You Asked, We Answered: TRS Mailbag

I really like that with my hair situation. (laughing) Why you laughing? I don't see you, you. But my hair, I couldn't stop it. I'm done. I tried. You did so great. I tried. We've all lost our f***ing mind. (upbeat music) Welcome back to the recap show. You may have noticed that we've switched seats. It's very unsettling. How do you feel over there? I like it. Look at my two girls. So cute. This is my like morning. Every morning, this is what I see. Maybe not. You dressed up like this. What? I wake up like this. And all your many robes. But no, this is, this is cute. We have an amazing episode in store. But before we get into this, I thought it would be great for us to just make note of the amazing rippling effects from the Olympics. And obviously the end of the Olympics was stained with what felt just like a sour taste on laughing at. The women, the women's hockey team for winning gold. And I was sort of like, how is this all gonna shake out? And what I saw and what I have seen and continue to see is instead of clapping back, I've seen this wave of uplifting women, celebrating women and so many fun energizing things that instead of like pointing to the bad, have just been so good. Absolutely. I mean, I think the women's stories of the Olympics just kind of spoke for themselves. They were the most exciting. And honestly, most winning as stories that we had, these Olympics, obviously the comparison between the men's and women's hockey team, both winning gold. But I was watching the SNL episode where they had on both hockey teams. And there was one part that was so funny because it was like the men hadn't won and like, I don't know, some insane amount of time. And which is really exciting, congrats to our men's team. But then the women were like, yeah, we haven't won in like, you know, two Olympics or something like that. And it just like, you're just reminded it, like how awesome just like the statement of what you do is. And I think what we're seeing now is just like, women celebrating themselves, but also like the community celebrating them for just like how awesome and badass and unapologetic they are while winning, while being successful while driving the interests of women's sports is like, this is just the now. Yeah. And I think it's so cool because there was this initial instinct that I had that was like, don't laugh at us women. We're laughing at you. And you think like that sort of like the first generation of like feminism is like anger at like the patriarchy and the fact that this is even happening in 2026. But it was better. The reaction was better because it was about creating celebrations and uplifting each other versus taking anybody down. And even the men and the women joining together on SNL. That was a nice moment, a nice gesture. Flav of Flav throwing a party. It's like, OK, you know, maybe you're not being celebrated in this space. So I'm going to create a new space that's all about the women and the Olympians. And now I've seen so many different iterations of people welcoming the women's hockey team to different spaces and just wanting to celebrate them. And then you see campaigns like Ally, where you have world class athletes sharing their favorite moments of celebration in sports and just really shining the light on the very best of women's sports and leaving the rest behind. Yeah. And it's so great because these women, they're now owning their worth and their value in these huge moments where the rest of the world is looking at them. And it's kind of like, yeah, I won. And yeah, all of you are talking about me and my team. And there's just this wonderful ownership of the space and acknowledgement of what's happening. And I think partners, Ally, are just continuing to shed a light on just how successful these women athletes are and how many people care about how successful they are and how many people are inspired by them. And it is-- I love what you just said. There is like a new one's there. It's like about the feeling that we have as women athletes where we're allowed to want things. We're allowed to want to win. We're allowed to be better than everybody else and to want money. And it's not that anyone else is allowing us. It's like we're allowing ourselves. Yeah. And I think we're moving past this generation of kind of like having to say what we are and what we're doing. And now we're just doing it. Like it kind of reminds me of like that shirt, everyone watches Women's Sports. It's almost like we had to declare it. Like was everybody watching Women's Sports? No. But it was like we had to declare the future, right? It was just saying it. And now it's like we're just moving past it. It's like we're not saying anything anymore. We're just doing it. We're appearing on television. We're appearing in marketing. People are investing. Like we're just doing it. We're just living it. And this is as natural as any other moment. Like we don't even have to say it anymore. We can just live it as women athletes. I love this. You always say words, create worlds. We created this world and now we're living in it. We're living in it. [MUSIC PLAYING] Spring is in the air. And with it comes trips, events, and the start of a busy season. If you're like me, between work, family, and everything else, shopping for a whole new wardrobe just isn't realistic. That's where Daily Look comes in. Daily Look is the number one highest-rated, premium personal styling service for women. You get your own dedicated personal stylist who selects a box of clothes just for you, based on your body shape, style, and lifestyle, delivered right to your door. These are real stylists, not an algorithm. 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Peloton is built for breakthroughs and with the new cross-training bike plus, you'll find endless ways to move and reach your goals effortlessly. As we hit the point in the new year, where we're tempted to ease out of our resolutions, we're looking to pedal on with Peloton. As we enter women's history month, we are thinking about women in sports and beauty standards and how they have made us feel on the field and off. So, Tobin, what does it mean to you to put your game face on? Mm, I haven't done it in a while. That's true. Yeah. Dig back into the archives. Yeah, I have to dig back. But I think there were a lot of iterations of this because obviously when you first start playing, you're not thinking about that whatsoever. I mean, at least at four years old, maybe subconsciously I was. No. But I can remember times where I felt like I had to be different. For me, I always wanted to be easy. I didn't-- I try to eliminate as many things as I have to think about when preparing for a game. So, for instance, I wore my hair the same way my whole entire career. I remember one time, actually. I was playing at Chicago. You were on the Chicago team and it was so windy. And I have these flyaway wispies that there was literally so much hair in my face that I wore pre-rap for the first time in my life. And I felt like a weird person. How would you play? I don't know. Probably-- actually, we never lost to Chicago. So, we either tied our one. I think we tied and I scored. And I hit the ball off the crossbar. Ooh. I spotted the wings. It was probably going in, but it was probably the wind. So, my hair was easy. And then I never wore makeup. And it wasn't until I actually went to play at PSG that all of a sudden there were such intense beauty standards as a part of that culture. I remember one of the first things. One of the coaches grabbed my hand, grabbed, sounds very aggressive, but took my hand and looked at my nails and they weren't painted. And he was like saying that that was not OK. And so then I started painting my nails. And then I started getting compliments for painting my nails. And then I kind of enjoyed it like an art like thing. And then another thing was-- I was so adaptable. You are, by the way. Yeah. Well, look, we live in a society where you get treated differently as a woman if you do certain beauty standards. So then there was another experience I had when I was there where I put makeup on my face. I don't know if it was for-- there was a reason other than going to soccer practice that I had makeup on my face, right? Why are you saying it? I had makeup on my face like it's magically got there. It just showed up. Anyways, and one of the coaches again-- this was a different coach-- said, I like your face, how it looks. And then obviously I was like-- and he then started commenting about that I should wear makeup. Overtly? Overtly. OK, originally. But then every time I would wear makeup or anytime my nails were done, there was some kind of interaction that happened about these beauty standards. And then-- so basically for the time that I played in Paris and maybe a little bit after, like I started wearing makeup not a lot, playing, and painting my nails. That didn't last very long. Obviously, it came back to the US. And I kind of settled down into my roots. And I never wore makeup or painted my nails again. You are adaptable, but you're also true to you. And eventually, you always make it back to that low poe. First, I have to set the record straight. I hit the crossbar and then it went in. So that's what I was saying. Oh. I scored. So the wind didn't mess me up. No, no. I calculated the wind. Either way, the wind either didn't allow for you to score, or that's the reason why you scored it. It is. The wind was a major factor that day. It is the reason I scored, because I calculated the wind. And then I hit the perfect shot. And then it went in off the crossbar. Now. You're good. I don't know if you're that good. That should be said in the past tense. OK. Secondly, your experience in France, in my opinion, is every single woman in sports experience, every single day, except for it was set out loud. What I feel-- I think that's the cultural difference. Yeah, the overtness. Like someone actually talked to you about your face. Like, that's a lawsuit in our country. But actually, it's happening under the current. And it's all happening subconscious. And you know what? No, not everyone feels it in the same degree. But I'll say for my experience, I definitely felt the benefit of presenting myself in a nice way. As an athlete, you're an entertainer, and you're in an arena, and you have camera up your face. And every single thing you do is being judged. And people want to know your personality and your character. And in a lot of ways, make up a little bit like a little bit of an armor, a barrier between you and protecting yourself in the rest of the world and how they see you. And for me, my pregame was slicking my hair back with massive amounts of hairspray and a dry and brush. And using like seven ponytail holders because one time my ponytail caused me not to score. It was a bun. But my hair cost me not to score, and I was like never again. So then I would just slick it back. But that experience of like wanting my ponytail to be slick and big and beautiful. And then I could feel it pulling my face. And then I would put on so much sunscreen. It was like war paint. And I think that that feeling made me feel like protected and ready to play. And I think you hear a lot of athletes like because this is the world we live in, like whether or not you're wearing makeup as a female athlete is actually asked because you're asked to explain yourself, you hear like look good, feel good, play good. And I think that's true. Like I wanted to look good. It did help me feel good. So hopefully I could play good. But also there's like another level of that where I wish I could feel good. Whatever I decided to do. Like I wish that I could look in the mirror and feel good without feeling like I had to look slightly different or better. And I think ultimately what I grapple with is this tension between wanting to love myself for how I am and being natural and age and have wild curly hair. And then this patriarchal male gaze beauty standard that is the ideal of white beauty. And it is very much like male oriented male gazing at women that has constructed what I even think is beauty. So then I'm like, well, if I feel good, am I feeling good because I'm subscribed to some ideology that I don't actually agree with? Ooh, this is a lot. We're going to continue this conversation. But I think ultimately when you feel strong, you feel strong and it doesn't matter where that comes from. That was Keep Pedaling sponsored by Peloton. Let yourself ride, lift, sculpt, push and go. Explore the new Peloton Cross Training Bike Plus at onepeloton.com. Thank you, Peloton. You know that feeling when you're at Minute 88. Your lungs are screaming and you've got one sprint left in the tank to save the game. Yeah, me neither. I'm retired. But for those of you still out there chasing glory, meet the new Peloton Cross Training Tread Plus. It's powered by Peloton IQ, which is basically like having a world-class strength coach in your ear, minus the whistle and the 6am yelling. Peloton IQ takes the guesswork out of the grind. It sets your goals and suggests weights so you aren't just lifting. You're actually making progress. Plus, there's a new movement tracking camera, to counter reps and correct your form in real time. When you're ready to switch from cardio to the heavy stuff, the swivel scream is a game changer. Go for a 45-minute run on the Tread Plus. Then, with one smooth spin, hit the floor for a strength training session. It's built for a well-rounded routine because we know your schedule is more packed than a stadium on Derby Day. Best part, Peloton IQ builds your personal workout roadmap. You get weekly recommended classes led by instructors who match your mood, your vibe, and your personality. With personalized plans and deeper insights, Peloton IQ helps you finally unlock those new breakthroughs. Let yourself run, lift, sculpt, push, and go. Explore the new Peloton Cross Training Tread Plus at 1peloton.com. So it's been a while since we did everyone's favorite segment community questions. But thanks to our beautiful community who continues to send those questions. And now we have the perfect opportunity to get quite a few of them as we are going to do a mailbag episode. I'm so excited. You know how much I love community questions. And you've got a hat full of them. I have notches a hat, but like a relic. Look at this hat. This isn't right. It was right from your mind, pal. It was. Yeah, and I'm going to wear it home. The Velcro Patch Hat. So I usually don't cheat, but I saw Massachusetts on one of these, and I kind of buried it. All right. You ready, start? Chiso, that the Massachusetts one I might get it still. OK, Allison from New York asks, that's better. What football rule would you like to see change either in general or in a specific league or competition? What football rule? Can I answer this? Yeah. Amazing. I'm going to try to go quick here. But I want to change the offside rules, rule 2, that there has to be space between the defender and the attacker for it to be ruled offside. So it's advantageous to the attackers and we'll have more goals in football. That's my first one. My second one is to address the issue of goalkeepers faking injuries for tactical reasons. We are working on this one, but there will definitely be a role in place to address that because it is just not the spirit of football. We're encouraging people to go down and hold their leg. And like, it's like bad jujube. Everyone's acting. I know. I really agree with that. Everyone's acting. And also-- No, no, that's not. What about getting rid of the flip throw? I mean, just automatic, uncool, and yeah, honestly, yeah, that would be my rule. Like, no flip throws. If you can throw a ball really long, like adjustment, Donald just-- What's going on with your neck off? I don't know how they throw it that far. They actually have the ability to extend their back, actually. Oh, yeah, I can do that. That's where you're going wrong. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But anyways, yeah, those are three roles. We've got a lot to do. I agree with all three. OK. I'm going to keep picking, but you can decide if you want to answer them. Puttry from New Zealand asks, what part of women's sports culture do you hope never changes, even as it gets bigger? Rolling the shorts. [LAUGHS] Just kidding. This is where my mind went. Let's think of I can think something smart. I've won. I hope that we continue to build around the people who have contributed to where the leagues and the teams are today. What do you mean by that? I think it's so easy to once this becomes-- once women's sports-- and it's happening right now, there's so much more money involved. It's so easy then to take deals with the-- do they-- would you call them the incumbents, like basically the huge sports infrastructures that exist? But I would say continue to invest in women, continue to invest in queer on spaces, continue to invest in women's sports media that started with women's sports. That's what I would say. Because I think we will just-- yeah, we won't be able to recognize ourselves in 10, 20 years if we just become like the sports version that was before. No, I love that. And I think about the fact that women playing sports in itself was almost like a movement or part of a revolution. And that sort of where we got our culture was just the idea of seeing women at the highest level, being celebrated, being put on billboards as superheroes, was just like an act of, I don't know, reinvention of culture. And as we get bigger and women get paid, and things do become more successful, I hope we can keep that spirit alive, that we get to redefine the rules to how we do things that we don't have to follow a pattern of sports that has been created for and by men. And as the money flows in, I think there's this element that we've always had of local community, and welcome beingness and inclusion, I think. That there is space to grow it. And we've created our own community space. That's where these questions come from, our re-space. And like, as it grows, I constantly think about safety. And when you're building a community, the more people there are, the more fear you have for safety. But what I've seen in our community is that because the spirit of why we've convened, why we've created this community, because that spirit is our origins, it's able to stay alive. And I think that that's the essence of the women's sports community and culture. That was so beautiful. Tali from Boston asked, "I have a sense from what you two, as well as other queer women athletes, have shared that the feelings and experiences of being openly queer have changed a lot over the last 2010 and even five years. What have you noticed in terms of changes of how queer women athletes are viewed and talked about? And from the inside, what the experience of queer women athletes has been during these different periods? Have you felt certain changes and when did you feel those? Where do you still want to see the narratives or experiences go if you'd like to see further changes or development in this?" Oh my goodness. That's an amazing question. And I was recently reflecting on my queer history, my own personal coming out. And I think now where we sit, it feels like you and I didn't struggle that we've been welcomed and that it was easy to come out and that we have this-- beautiful love story and that's far from the truth. And I don't know why in our individual-- I don't know, traumas or processing our life. I don't think either of us have really dug into what our coming out experience has been yet. We are working on ourselves always. But it was actually really traumatic and hard for us. And we both grew up in a time where on our club teams as kids, there probably weren't any out gay women. On my college team, there was no gay out women. We found out we're in relationship secretly. There was a lot of taboo around that. And coming out to our parents for both of us was really, really hard and very associated with soccer. Like my parents and especially my mom thought I was gay because I played soccer. And yeah, I think we just personally lived through a period where there was a lot more women out in sports. And so when we left the sport, it felt like it was a welcomed space for gays and for lesbians and women sports. But that wasn't how the space was when we entered it. I'm sure it's been progressively better. So I mean that with complete reverence for the people who had it even harder before us. But I think we both navigated it very carefully, very cautiously, and we've been lucky to feel like incredibly embraced by our community. But it came with a lot of hardship too. And I don't know what it's like now for people in club soccer and college. I don't know if there's a lot more openly gay women. I assume so. I get the sense that the next generation is a lot more fluid with their labels. But maybe that's not true. What do you think? I think it-- I hope maybe it's easier, but I never found it to be easy whatsoever. But I do think that there is a safe space that women's sports has created for the queer community in certain locker rooms that we've been in. But there are certain times where even the locker room didn't feel safe. So I think that it's a complicated question, because I think it's like we've Instagram this, right? Like we have now a version that people like to see, which is you ship people. And there's now outcouples on the same team, on different team, in different leagues. And we've Instagrammed it to make it look like all easy and funny and cool. But there's a lot of hardship in all things in life. And I don't think it's easy whatsoever. And when I see players that are open and currently playing, I know for a fact it's not easy. So I'm glad that that kind of bravery and that type of visibility is making people think that-- and we have come a long way. But I still think it's a very complicated and difficult and fearful time. And yeah, that's my personal feeling about it. Yeah, no, it's true. And it's almost like an odd thing in my mind that I don't remember the way it really was. But I think ultimately I feel really grateful that the women's soccer community has given us such a gentle hug at the end here. Totally. J.C. from Fargo. If Tobin is a red-tailed hawk, what kind of bird is Kristen? L-O-L. California quail. Anna's hummingbird scrub J, chickadee, for some options. How did you become a hawk, a red-tailed hawk? And I want to know that, too, because this is my family bird. Oh my gosh, they must know that. How would they know that? That's because you talked about it on the recapture. I have never talked about that. And honestly, it's personal. But you did. It was something to do with your grandma getting a hawk as a gift. No. It's when-- it's-- no. When we see our red-tailed hawk, it's my grandpa. No, I know. But Graham got a red-tailed hawk gift for her birthday. And he talked about it on the show. J.C. don't want to go ahead with this question. Oh, yeah. OK. So you're a red-tailed hawk because you actually are, but you're nervous because it's personal. So what do you-- I got a red-tailed hawk. I guess it's in your lineage. Oh, it's in your lineage. In my family. Honestly, you're a pretty hawk-like. Really? Yeah. When I see a hawk, I'm like, [LAUGHS] I am definitely the hummingbird because I recently saw a hummingbird. And those things are flapping their wings so fast and working so hard to fly. You are. Yeah. Oh, my gosh. There was one more mending recently when you were just talking at me at 1,000 miles an hour. And I hadn't said anything. And I just looked over at you. And you looked like a hummingbird. Yeah. It's like hummingbirds are so beautiful. And everyone's like, oh, I love hummingbirds. But the reality is that they can barely fly. And they are working so freaking hard. That's so mean. I think they look like great flyers. No, they are working so hard to come off looking good. But it is a struggle. It's like the duck under the water. But the hummingbirds are doing a straight in your face. But their wings are flapping so fast that you can't even see them. It's just a blur. And that's why it's beautiful. You know why you also could be a hummingbird? Because they like sugar water. [LAUGHS] OK, one more. OK, she said one more. She said one more. Oh, Ashley from Massachusetts asked, knowing what you know now, one, is there a specific choice you made in your career that you would change? Two, how do you feel about never playing on a club team together in NWSL? I know that Tobin won't answer the second one that she feels effing good about ever being my teammate. Because she really likes having her own identities. So there's that. OK, the first part's a hard question because I don't really look backward. They say that each person's like oriented past-- present in her future. And I'm future oriented. I do my schedule a thousand times. So I don't think I have regret. But I would have scored. I had tricky to work up finals in a growing world. Oh my gosh. Good one. How about that? I have something. OK. There was a moment in the final 2019 final that I still can remember the feeling where I wanted to chip the goalkeeper, the balls of my foot, and like my mind, like, said chip, and I didn't do it. And I still remember that feeling. Oh my gosh. And I wish I did it. Oh my gosh. So when you started talking, I thought you were going to say there was a moment in the world final 2019 that I was wide open and you could have passed it to me. You remind me of that, but I never saw that. And you took the touch wide and you hit it in the outside side. No, that's what I was supposed to do. You were probably thinking about chipping it. I probably was thinking about chipping it. I actually thought you were going to say here on the recap show that you wish you had passed it to me. And you had been playing it over and over in your head. Honestly, if that was an option that I had in my mind, I would for sure have regretted it, but it was never an option. Yeah, because you were just seeing you in the chip. You were always one for glory. Yeah, that sums me up. OK, well, these were great questions. Our community is the best in the whole world. We're so lucky. We have more questions. So we have to do this again. We do. And the best part about-- I'm going to keep these under my head so that just so I'll be thinking about our community all the time. You know what's funny? Your head looks like more of a normal size right now than normal. You know what? I might even put these ones in. There you go. Yep. Beautiful. Yeah. So that way, whenever I'm thinking about our community, I can just pull one out. And as I was saying, it's amazing that we get to have a two-way conversation with our community. And that we get to create this. And another important thing that everybody needs to know is we are now doing TIRS Thursday's live. And I think it's being kicked off at Untamed Spirits. But we're hopefully going to do them at a lot of women's sports bars or sports bars that show a lot of women's sports. And if you have any recommendations for any sports bars that you want to introduce to TIRS Live, let us know as a place where we'll really-- every Thursday we release TIRS that you-- if you're a TIRS fan, re-imaginer, you can come together, meet some folks that also love TIRS. They might love you too. Well, I will say we have this never watch alone about a game. But I think I really like the idea of everyone watching TIRS in community. Me too. So we have launched a new initiative called Wares Women's Football. And that initiative is re-times Wares Football. And what we are doing, which we're really excited about, is a new segment where we're going to be highlighting women and queer football communities around the globe. And just celebrating how we come together around the joy of football. Yeah, and we get to highlight a really cool community in solo CFC that will take us to our favorite Mexico City. Wares Women's Wares Women's Football. Hola, I am Ferpinha. I am from Mexico City. My favorite city in the world. And this is the city that I represent. And I come from football. I played for the Mexican national team. I got an scholarship and played for LSU Tires. And later on, I played for the club America here in Mexico. And today, my work leaves between football, creativity, and community. My project is called solo CFC. And it means just being like just the U. And solo CFC, it's a community driven football project that creates open mixed spaces in a public court in Mexico City, where people come to play, to connect, to belong to a community, and also to feel free to express themselves. Playing in Mexico City feels intense, emotional, and it's a life. Football is everywhere. It's in the streets, in the conversations, in the TVs. It's in our daily lives. It's an experience you truly have to live to understand. What makes solo C unique is that belonging comes before competition, that you don't have to change who you are to play here. The court becomes more of a cultural space, not just a sport. And that place where you connect with really kind people, you can laugh, you can move, and generally have a very good time. So, solo C is my baby. It was built from so much love. And over the time, it has become a home for so many people. And I have done it mostly by myself. So I feel like now the project is ready to grow. And you guys can support through funding, partnerships, or collaboration, allows to show up more consistently, to build a real team and expand the positive impact this space has on many people's lives in a long term and sustainable way. Where is woman's foot more?