Why Men Pull Away Even When They Like You

Welcome to My First Live Stream: Today's Topics Start streaming, we are connecting, we are connecting and hopefully we are live on Twitch. OK, welcome everyone. I don't know if I'm live, this is my first time doing this OK I'm just a girl do not come for me. If you see me look over to the side that's because I also am live on TikTok at the same time because you know we're fishing over here and I'm German. So I'm like might as well not put all of my eggs into one basket but might as well go live on TikTok at the same time. I'm literally looking at 2 screens. Hello, hello. I can see the live chat on TikTok. I don't know if the live chat is live on twitch. Let's have a look. Oh no, we are live. We are live. Yes. Welcome to my first ever Twitch stream guys. I'm so excited. I don't know where to look because this is literally so overwhelmed because there's literally 3 different screens. OK, I've got my phone, I've got my laptop and I've got my iPad and I'm looking down at my iPad. I feel like I should put my iPad like this so I can kind of and I put the mic down. The only question is, do you still hear me? Well with the mic like this, people on TikTok are jealous. They're like come to TikTok first. No, I'm sorry, we can't do it because Twitch actually allows me an option to go into YouTube. So what we're going to do is today I will be showing you some of my life couples analysis in action, OK, I'm so excited because I will be sharing my screen with you later on for everybody who's watching on Twitch, I'm going to give you a little preview. All right, so this is so exciting. I feel like I have my own little TV show now so I'm going to see if this works in the chat on twitch. Let me know if you can see this TikTok. You're missing out. TikTok come to twitch. Can everyone see this? Can everyone see my screen? Can everyone see the YouTube and me in the corner? You know how you see it on twitch? How you see it on kik? How all the professional streamers are doing it, Girl, this setup is amazing because what's going to happen from today onward weekly, OK, I'm going to change the timing a little bit because it's 12:00 PM in Europe. It's not the greatest for everyone. Most of you are from the USA. Lot of people here from Germany, which is amazing. Lots of people where I'm from, from Germany, but yeah, lots of Europeans here. And I just want to give you so much value. I want to review so many cool videos with you. And we're going to do it live together. So everyone TikTok, head to Twitch. You're definitely missing out because we're going to do the live couple analysis today around the viral New York rooftop couple. We're also going to look into different couples that I love. I love Tom Holland, I love Zendaya. There's also a little bit of drama we need to discuss, OK, because we have Callum Turner and his ex-girlfriend and stars talking in the podcast about how Callum Turner used to tell, I think her name is Victoria. OK, I'm going to do a little bit more research around this life with you, so do not quote me just yet. But his girlfriend Victoria, he will tell her, babe, we can't do any photos and whatever because it's just not who I am. And I don't like the paparazzi. I don't want to post with you. And then all of a sudden he's with Dua Lipa, they're married, and he posts about her nonstop. OK, so there's like a few things like very juicy topics today. So make sure you're staying till the end. I don't know how long the stream is going to go for, but probably a long while. OK, so nice to see everyone in the chat room. We also have some of my mentorship girls here. So welcome to my VIP clients, the mentorship girls. We also have some questions from my clients that are going to be answered first. OK, so before we go into the couples analysis, I will be sharing the screen again to just me to this beautiful view that we can't get enough of clearly and I will be answering some questions first. OK, if you have any questions in terms of I don't know if any tech things happen, knock on wood, please let me know. This is my first time and I really need to work on all of the setup. There's so many people on TikTok First, I'm seeing you live yo come to twitch. So please let me know if there's any issues with the mic or you don't hear something. You don't you don't see something that I'm sharing. Please let me know in the comments so I can keep on top of it. OK, so with all of that being said, even with the mic, I hope you can hear me. So let me know if that all works. Analyzing a Listener's Dating Dilemma: Early Intimacy All right, so let's get into the questions, shall we? I'm going to open. I'm like a boomer with this iPad. Are you serious? Oh my God. But here we are. I turned 30, it was my birthday I think 4 days ago. So yeah, I'm a boomer now I guess. So me with the iPad, it suits me, right? OK, so we have a few questions. We also have a few scenarios and case studies. So let me start with some of my VIP client questions because I promised them. You get first in line ladies. OK, we have a little bit of a scenario which I'm going to read out loud. It is confidential. I haven't been in a relationship for nearly a year. My last relationship hurt me so much that it completely disgusted me. From men dating relationships all together. I joined your mentorship program because I wanted to learn from you and understand myself better. Then I met this guy and for the first time in a long time I actually felt excited about someone. We've been on four dates and my interest in him has grown. If I as a mentor have to pause it for a second, I immediately go to places thinking, OK, so you're telling me you're the first time very excited about someone. Why you've been on four dates? Four dates is not that long. Like it's a month, you know what I mean? Like some people you've been working with for maybe four years and you still don't trust them, You know what I mean? In a Co working space and setting. So when it comes to romantic love, I will tell you straight away, I can read from here that there's a lot of attraction maybe OK, it's just an assumption. I'll read further in a second. But there might be a lot of attraction or chemistry from your end that you might mistake for true connection and compare comparability. Because for dates you don't really know the person. So what? What is it about this guy that you really like? So if you would be live with me, I would now make you reflect on what is it you really like about this man. And after four days only already you hated going out dating, you hated man, you hated the idea of relationships. And all of a sudden you really, you know, like are you really like this guy? Where is this huge and sharp contrast coming from? Is there a chance that your physical of physiological reaction to this man being close to you and you being across the dinner table and going on dates, that may be your body and the chemistry and the, the, the attraction levels are maybe creating a false sense of closeness or connection. I would love for you to reflect on this. OK, we've been on four dates. Mattress has grown. The thing is, he's pushing for intimacy. Bad red flag because if a man likes you, he respects you and he obviously is scared of touching you because I mean don't let me get into this now, OK? Otherwise the stream is going to be 5 hours. But there's something like the Madonna whore complex where some men, not all men, not all men, but some men can't like fathom the idea of the same woman they sleep with. I feel like I need to be careful how I speak because I can't say the word SEX on stream, I don't think. But some men don't want to put the same woman in they sleep with and are also their wives and the mother of the children, somewhat in the same category, their male fetishes or their male lustful attraction and behavior versus then the woman they see as the dream girl and their future wife and their future or the mother of the children. For some men, it truly is hard to sort of combine the two. I think the best relationships are actually where you combine the two, where men can be dirty with you and you can be dirty with your men and at the same time, you know, you're like a devoted partner or wife and devoted mother children. But anyway, for some men, they therefore marry, for example, and they love their wife, they love their children, they love being a father, they love being a husband. But it's almost like based more on like a friendship level, like true like genuine love. But for men, the differentiate between love and lust at times, again, not all of them. And then they will seek out their promiscuous behavior or lustful behavior and like the physical attraction, which means nothing how much he likes you, but he will seek his attraction last, sexual intimacy, all of that. He will seek that from someone else. This is why so many men cheat on the woman they do love. OK, and don't twist my words. Don't now say, Oh my God, Anna told me that, you know, he cheated on me, but he still loves me, girl. But a lot of men are like that. Women mostly cheat when they're not in love with their men anymore, you know? OK, let's continue with this little case study, shall we? Because I think a lot of you might see themselves in that as well. I told him that I needed to fee say first. Great. On our last date, he said he was willing to wait for sex. Amazing. But also, why is this even a topic of conversation? I'm so sorry but I think it's the worst thing to talk verbally about sex. I mean I was scared earlier to saying this word because I feel like it's PG rated in the stream but now I'm blurting it out. I don't know. We shall see. Right now we're still rolling so I'm guessing it's OK. I think the quickest way to almost get rid of any sort of chemistry, any sort of attraction, any sexual spark is to address it and talk about it. So again, my my mentorship view on this, if you'll be live with me in the room and you'll be my client, I will tell you. Why do you talk about sex already on the third date, right? Like, why is this a topic of conversation? And clearly we all know it's sort of like this is the elephant in the room, in the room between men and women. Like we're starting to date and we're attracted to this person and we kind of like knowing we're going to jump into bed at some point, you know, and especially when you like them, like all you want to do is be close to them physically. But men know women like to wait. It's, it's more of a sacred ritual for us, right? And we like to wait and we guard our bodies and all of our feminine energy and everything. And men know this and women know women just want to sleep with us anyway. So we are kind of playing the game a little bit here. This is why we date, to test boundaries, to see how the people feel about it. But this is literally why we date and like hang out together, right? Like not for not for sexual closes or physical intimacy, but to sort of see and understand people's values and standards and like, especially men. Like, is she going to hop into bed with me the first time around or not? Is she going to wait? I have guy friends who literally tell me that they will push for sex on the first date and they are the ones initiating and wanting it. And then as soon as they sleep with the woman that they chase and they wanted to sleep with, they lose interest. And then I asked them why and they said well because she slept with me. And I said well what you initiated to sleep with her? And they said, well, yeah, because men always going to initiate sex with you. It's true, you know, so they would test your boundaries. So even now it's getting like a little bit awkward 3 or 4 days in talking about sex. Like if you're married and you're together and you're already in a established relationship, and then you talk about the topic of sex, but in a way where you talk about your preferences, what you like, what you don't like, you make it sexy. It's like dirty talk that's different. But you don't really know each other. You're 3-4 dates in the topic of sex is now awkwardly in the room with 1000 on the table. I don't know, I'm not a big fan. OK, but let's continue. On our last date, he said he was willing to wait for sex even though he disagreed with my approach girl, because he believes sexual comparability is important to establish early. All right, let me take a deep breath. Let's talk about sexual comparability. What does it mean? And men being horny and constantly wanting to put as EU inside your EU sexual comparability when a man tells you that a man, a man being like, Oh my God, we got to be sexually compatible. OK, We got to be romantically compatible. Like from a female perspective, we got to be emotionally compatible because I need to know that you as a man are in your masculine energy and you can provide for me while I'm literally 9 months pregnant not being able to walk. Do you know what I mean? Like you want to be able to build a life with this person and feel safe with them. And this is the biggest cop out. What a man tells you I need to test my sexual comparability with you. It just means how willing are you as a woman to jump into bed with me as soon as possible without me having to provide that much. If a man says that to you, it is selfish and he's not willing to offer you much. A man that really likes you respects you, respects your intimacy, respects you, your body, respects your sexuality. It's the highest reward for him and he actually wants to do things for you in order to then get access to it. He is lazy and wants your highest reward. OK, just remember that woman, whether you choose to or not and whether you, you know, biologically there are, but women are here to give life. So that's like your gift and he wants that from you without actually giving anything in return. OK, let's carry on. Also, Oh my God. Someone said it looked like Bonnie Blue. Do I need to close the live chat? Let me quickly open the live chat one more time so I can check in with all the girlies from Twitch. I hope my Internet is good. I just want to make sure that all the tech is good and it's all loading. Hi Anna. Yes Queen. I love that. I love all of the messages. Right now it's not connecting, but that's OK. I'm just going to keep rolling with it. If we do have any issues with the tech, let me know. OK so back to the case study. Navigating Inconsistent Behavior, Boundaries, and Self-Worth After that date, I told him I was actually starting to feel ready to meet at his place and ever since then his messages have become inconsistent. He leaves me on red for hours. He posts stories with his friends taking to the OK. Pause, pause, pause. Everyone's like finally Anna's back. Yes, I've been gone for almost 6 months. I'm back. I'm not stopping. I'm so excited to be back. OK so after the date, she told him that she's ready to go over to his place. And ever since then, he's messaging inconsistently. He's always going out with the guys. He's not really interested anymore. But he posts stories but not with her. And he doesn't he can't message back. So here's what happened. He was never romantically interested in the first place. He was never emotionally committed in the 1st place. He wanted quick sex from you. You didn't give it to him. Amazing. You have boundaries. Amazing. Now you're anxious attachment kicked in because we all have a deep longing for love and connection. So all of a sudden you subconsciously got pressured from his weird manipulative sexual comparability comments you got pressured into. I do like this man, like I don't want to lose him. So therefore you kind of coming his where you're actually compromising your own values and boundaries by saying I'm going to come over to his place. OK, See what you're doing there? Like you neglecting yourself in order to please him and what are you pleasing him with something that you're giving yourself up with? You're giving access to yourself without him actually having to earn it. I don't like, I get so angry about this and passionate because I'm so protective of all of you girls out there. Don't let that be done to yourself. It's not worth it, you know, because men will use you like he's clearly wanting sex from you and that's what he's using you for. And all the red flags are there. You're compromising your own boundaries, your own values to go over to his place. And now he's not even interested anymore because he also feels like the chase is really gone. Like he got everything he wanted out of you for an ego boost, right? He's on been a few dates with you, but then all of a sudden he's realizing, oh, this girl's a bit more difficult, like I can't get between her, her legs. So I'm just going to tell her this is very important to me and we're not sexually compatible. And then you think, oh, I like this man. I feel like he's running through my hands. I can't hold him. He's disappearing on me. I'm just going to compromise my own worth and value and boundaries. I'm just going to make sure that I'm ready to go to his place and maybe we can do the deed. And the moment you actually compromise your own values and your self worth and your beliefs and your boundaries and you laid out to him on a silver tray, he all of a sudden becomes inconsistent and disappears. Why is that? Because his ego has gotten everything he wanted from you. The chase is over. And now the whole sexual chemistry is somewhat gone as well because now he's like, oh, she wasn't easy catch after all. So it's like a, it's some men literally just stated to test how, how you, how quickly you're going to end up in bed with them and they're going to date you for their own pleasure and they're going to date you as a test for the ego, not genuinely for you. This is why it's really important when you date somebody to ask the right questions, you know, to really build connection over verbal exchange, like getting to know people on a deeper level and make sure that men get to know you on a deeper level, too. And they can respect you as a person and they like you as a person. And you can rule them out quickly as soon as you realize they just want one thing from you. There's also, you know, another narrative going on around online from other dating cultures, which some what I agree with. If men only want sex from you, men can twist it on on its head and say, well, we only want money from men. Like if that is, you know, and some of you watching this might be OK with that and want that. Me personally, I'm not a fan of that. But yeah, that's just that's just my viewpoint. All right, continuing. I remember you saying in the mentorship that inconsistency is a powerful trigger for attachment, that that is exactly how it feels. But that's exactly what he did. It's inconsistent. It's hot and cold. He put himself 1st and maybe you're anxious attachment or wounds and childhood triggers and the longing to be long and be loved and accepted overpowered your own boundaries. And this is how you know that you're not maybe there yet in yourself development journey that when you pass triggers and the way you've been brought up as a child, your inner conditioning, your belief systems, your parents voices, the neglect, the abuse from back in the day. All of these negative feelings from your previous attachment styles that you had to your parents. If that is triggered with a man still now and you act on these past emotions in the past condition self, literally your inner child, you act on that, you slip back into the role of that inner child that felt abandoned and in solitude and all of that. If you slip back into those old patterns and behaviors, rather than still feeling shitty about it, sad, hurt, you know, in pain, anxious, nervous, like whatever, you can feel all of the negative emotions from your past conditioning, right? It's it's, it's an emotion. You feel it, it's triggered. There's is something in your subconscious that reminds you, oh, I've been here before, I've been neglected before, I've been abused before, I've been ghosted before, I've been abandoned before, right? You can feel these things. But what's important now is to choose a new future. And the new future should look like I'm going to have boundaries no matter how I feel. I don't care if this man is the most amazing man on the planet if he doesn't give me what I want, which is respect towards my boundaries, my values, and maybe more patience with physical intimacy. If he can't take the boxes I need him to tick. There's no negotiables that I'm body as a person that standards I'm body as a person is if he can't give up to them, I don't want to see him. And this is by the way, what I mean by women need to have high standards. I don't mean he needs to give me 10K minimum a week spendings. He needs to always buy me flowers. He needs to do this. These are all add-ons. They're great. But let me tell you, there's a lot of women with all of the jewelry in the world, a lot of flowers on the table each week, and they're miserable because their men either cheat or their men are not acting right or their men don't care about them as a person. OK. It's important that you connect with someone on an emotional level. OK, let's continue because I think there's just one more part to this case study. OK, I guess my question is, oh, the question is only coming now. I guess my question is, how do I quiet that part of my brain? How do I stop thinking about someone when there is no extra information to process? How do I stop my mind from filling in the blanks during those empty moments? OK, I basically answered all of that just then. How do I quiet that part of my brain? Look, I can tell you night and day now, go to therapy, do the healing, da da da. The quickest way to quiet the part of your brain that is anxious and overthinking is to remember it's probably your inner child. It's probably a past version of you or maybe the teenage version of you, and maybe a version of you that was the ex-girlfriend or ex-wife of a previous man. There's some wound or trigger attached to a past version of you and the person you're either dating or seeing now is activating that same core wound. That's it. OK, this is what's happening. I can save you years of therapy just you knowing this now. Everything in the in your life is a choice. So you're always presented with two choices, not more. You only have two choices when you're activated and triggered in the same way of anxiousness, pain, hurt, betrayal, whatever emotion is you feeling, whatever you're going through, you can either repeat the same destructive pattern and either phone to victim mentality and think, Oh my God, I'm never going to heal. This is always going to happen. I'm only attracting Batman. This is so negative. And Oh my God, I loved him so much and I've really trusted him and he's going to be my future husband. But now he cheated me, me, me, poor me. Victim, victim, victim. All. You say I'm above this pain and I'm not going to let that past version of me, that past conditioning, really activate my nervous system and my subconscious. You have to pull yourself out of your body, but you feel the emotions in your nervous system, in your subconscious. You have to pull yourself into the conscious mind and think, I'm going to make a different choice. I'm going to just handle this differently and you can handle it differently literally by just admitting to yourself this man did not meet my my values, my standards. Like I'm a person that would never cheat. He cheated. OK bye bye. That's how simple it is. Like you got to love yourself more than that man. You got to respect yourself more than that guy. You need to love yourself before you love anybody in this world. You need to love yourself. Even when you love a man, you still love yourself more. You always love yourself more than any man you dating, seeing, marrying, have children with. You always put yourself 1st and if this is the foundation that you lead with in your life, anyone who then doesn't treat you with the same integrity and respect and love that you giving yourself, they're not on your level. So you say bye bye. It's not a loss to you because they already proven to themselves that they are beneath you. It's only a loss to you if you don't have confidence in self worth and you think this person is on such a high pedestal. And this is what sometimes to me is crazy. People literally will pedestal a man. So like out of this world, like this man is amazing and this, even though he acts like the biggest idiot and has no morals or ethics or values and clearly this dude from the case study of Red doesn't. He's pushing for sexual intimacy after 3-4 dates. He's even verbally addressing it. He's saying we're not sexually compatible. OK, wow. That's like disrespectful to me. That's like the biggest turn off now. I don't care how much I like someone or feel a connection with, as soon as something like this will come out of a man's mouth, I lose interest. Do you know what I mean? Because I immediately know. Oh, you just want to sleep with me? But we'll see. If anything, it's not a compliment. A man's lust and a man's lustful behavior towards you is not a compliment. You can only really measure how much a man likes you by his actions towards you. And even then, you got to be cautious because maybe he's only investing into you for sex in return. How can you test it that that is not the case? By pushing out and holding off your biggest gift, right? Physical, feminine, energy, sexual intimacy by holding off as long as possible and making a man invest into you whether it is emotional, physical through money, financial, making time, making calls, bringing you things, quality time, acts of service and what people forget. And This is why I always talk about the golden retriever. It's in their nature. Just like we have in our nature somewhat of a mothering instinct. And if we sometimes don't have a lot of self worth as women, we fall too much into our mothering instinct. And we mother men because we think this is what we should be doing. We're really, you should be doing it for your children and other women too, by the way. OK, let me quickly double check what's going on in the live chat. This is so fun girls. I love it. OK, connecting to chat. I feel like my my chat is not the best everyone being new on TikTok. Hello everyone, I'm talking to the camera here because I'm live on twitch. Come to twitch because we're going to do a full cup analysis on YouTube in a second as well. Do you know I was like, I'm going to do this stream for like 30 minutes. Sorry, I'm going to do this stream for like an hour and I've only answered one case study and we're already half an hour in. This is how I know I'm born for long form content I'm born for like YouTube and twitch like this is TikTok used to be my baby. OK, my first born child Instagram is my second born and then Spotify, but I just love being in front of the camera. If you couldn't tell, and I love talking to you all right, so ladies in the chat, because I'm watching the chat as well on twitch. You can also ask me questions all right, so bring them through. Let me let me see if there's anything coming through here as well. Ask me questions in the live chat on Twitch. Now I have more questions actually to answer for you before we do our live analysis. Two Options for Women Facing Betrayal in Marriage And these are short and sharp. I just wanted to start with a little bit of a case study. So someone asked about the psychology of men after confessing on betrayal and how women with kids should act. I think you should offer him two options. Or actually, I'm going to offer you two options, right. So a lot of celebrity couples do this. I'm not going to be the type of woman that says girl leave him, blah, blah, blah because it's intellectually lazy. It is also very superficial and form of privilege not a lot of women have. It's like the dumbest thing when I see this online. Oh my God, he cheated on me after 20 years. We have children together. Girl leave him. Well duh. OK, like of course. But at the same time, it's the privilege not all women have. They don't have the money, they're financially dependent on their men. Also, it would completely tear apart the family. Maybe there's also issues with different religious, different cultures. Like you never know. OK, I've been coaching women one-on-one for years, so I know I'm like a first responder to these emergencies. OK, Like, I know what it's like. It's easier said than done. So let's assess this a little bit. I think option number one, obviously the superficial one that you already heard from every single dating coach out there. Leave him, take your stuff, divorce, move out, take the kids, even though it's sad, tell the children, well, this happened, blah, blah, blah, option #2 And this is what a lot of celebrity covers do. And I think this is actually what Victoria Beckham and David Beckham did because I do think that they might have been a cheating scandal, which funnily enough, kind of piggybacks of what I've said earlier or goes hand in hand with what I said earlier, that I do believe he loves Victoria to death like he loves her and it's the mother of his children, it's his wife and everything. But sometimes there's promiscuous women too, you know, sometimes there's also women that say, Oh my God, this man is a star. Want to jump into bed with him, Whatever. I'm not saying he's innocent. I'm not saying she's innocent. Whatever. Also, I was like, what? I was probably 8 years old when it happened. So I don't, I don't recall that, but I've heard that there was like a cheating scandal and they stayed together and it was like for the sake of the family. So I think if you're married, this man cheats on you, you have children with him, either you leave and you say it's all worth it. You know, like I'm so unhappy in this marriage already. It's not worth it. And the children are going to suffer from this. We're fighting every single day. This is just a pain in the ass. I'm going to try to do everything my power to look after the financials and I'm going to place more importance on my independent happiness and my own value and belief system. And even if I have to take a big pay cut or I have to as a woman, take a job again, I don't want to be with this man anymore because he betrayed me. I'll never trust him again. It is too much of a betrayal that I could ever move on from it. So I let him go. But then you do that. Then you do let him go. None of this bullshit. Yes. Well, you know, we still staying together because of the kids. We're living in the same house. Are you serious? None of this, oh, yeah, we're still married, but like, we live separately. OK. Like, what's with that? Like a clean cut is a clean cut. You got to have a backbone as a woman and make sure that you stay or stand on your word and you follow through with it. OK, option #2 This is very black and white, you could say. I know this man loves me. We have a great friendship. I know that he made, he, he did something promiscuous, which I'm not a fan of. But you know, I also understand he's a man and he was curious after years of marriage. I'm going to get I'm going to get a shit stomp for this, but I don't care. And you're almost above it as a woman. And you say for the sake of the children, we just stay together. And I'm just going to turn a blind eye. But on the other hand, I might ask him if I can open the relationship so I can also, you know, have some fun since he's opened the relationship on his terms without telling me and he's been cheating. He had an affair. Might as well ask if I can also open the relationship, you know, and see other men. And you obviously keep it in secret, away from the children. But it's an eye for an eye. You act unbothered. Nothing happened. That's fine. I understand. We've been together for years. You know, you wanted to explore. I'm glad you had your fun. And now that you're admitting this to me, actually, I would also like to have some fun. Why don't we open the marriage? Why don't we open the relationship and we can both explore. And we all know this is reverse psychology because men are very territorial for a woman to cheat in a man's mind, it's much worse. Even though it's unfair. No one's going to hear wants, wants to hear this. But like for men, a woman cheating is much, much worse than a man cheating because men know women usually cheat out of emotional like a emotional deficit out of and they don't respect their men anymore. They don't love their men anymore. They're not attracted to the men anymore. So they sleep with someone else for sorry for emotional closeness. Men don't care. Men could sleep with anything and still love their wives. So it will cut him a little bit deeper and you're basically using reverse psychology and he will probably rebel against it and say no. Well, what do you mean? You want to have fun? Like, and then you just, you just so cool, so sweet, so unbothered. You don't care. You just come and collect and you tell them, well, honey, you had some fun. So I think it's time to have my turn. And the kids are happy. We stayed together. You know, we spent a life together for 20-30, forty years. There's no need to go through the whole drama of divorce. And how could you? It's an eye for an eye. You had your fun. Now let me have mine, you know, Easy. That's it. That's literally, it's so funny because that's literally what I would do. And also when I was like 9 or 8 years old with my best friend, we were hanging out in Germany in this park. And I was this lady. She was like, oh, I would say like maybe in her 60s or 70s. And she was just sitting there, like watching the trees and the wind and the sunset and kind of sat with her. And we talked to her because I talked to anyone, right? And I love making connections. And so we spoke to her and she was kind of all of a sudden talking about, I think she I think we actually approached her and talked with her about us seeing our crushes before or whatever. Like we were like really young. And then she was like, ladies, let me give you a little life lesson on men. And I was like, oh, let me here. And she said, I just divorced my husband. So I let him go. She always used these like really wise words, like this one was like sent to me. I feel like it was like in a book, like she was like this older wise lady. And she just said, I let this man go. And me and my best friend, we looked at each other. We like 8-9 years old. We don't understand man. We don't understand the world. Be like, what do you mean? And he's, and she, she just said so happy and so confident, peaceful. She just said he was the love of my life. He was the father of my children. But there was a time where I knew our time had ended and I knew that he's a man. I wanted to let him fly, lie. He's a free bird. I wanted to let him fly before we ever get into a point of betrayal or darkness and our families involved. I could sense that maybe his eyes were wandering. I could sense that he's longing for more. And I decided to let him fly. I decided to let him go. And that's story from that all. The lady really stuck with me and for some reason I just listened to her. I looked at her, she looked so happy and peaceful and I was like, damn, like this is how you want to deal with a breakup or divorce. Like let him go, you're setting him free. Like even the way she said it, it was like she knew she had all the power. She knew this was not a loss to her. You know, she will always have her children. She will always have herself. She will always have the community, community of women as well. Finding Love: Real-Life Connections and Approachability OK, so next question. Also ladies, please drop me some questions in the live chat box. I don't know if my Internet is good because I feel I don't get questions coming through on the chat in Twitch. OK, there's some coming through. There's some coming through. Maybe I'll leave the chat on Twitch open so we can see if there's more coming through. There's a lot of questions also on TikTok, so maybe I can combine the two. TikTok is set up on a very strange angle. I'm sorry, TikTok literally is only seeing my armpit. This is this is crazy. OK, this is better. All right. Do you think a high value women use dating apps? What's your opinion on that? I love meeting people in Relive. I've met all of my ex partners and current partner in Relive. But I do think that it can be helpful. You know, I would also be smart about doing it, like I would set the location on different places in your city that are more affluent, more wealthy, like the the suburbs that you would like to marry into, for example. Like there's nothing wrong. I'm not gonna sit here and say dating apps suck. You know, like, again, it's like a form of privilege to just tell people off or without giving solutions. So dating apps are something that can work for women. But at the same time, I think meeting people in real life is so, so, so, so, so much better because you can't create a false sense of closeness through texting. You can't create like all of this manipulation, men chasing you like your photos and commenting on your dating a profile because I just want to sleep with you. You kind of get rid of all of these grey zones when you meet people in real life. Because in real life, it's like back in the day before Internet, before we had phones, you would meet somebody at 3:00 PM underneath that tree on that public park bench. And you wouldn't tell them on WhatsApp and you wouldn't 20 times call them up and you wouldn't stalk them on Instagram. What they're doing on this story. You would say we meet here at 3:00 PM underneath this park bench, underneath this tree on this park bench. And then you get there and they're either there or they're not, you know, So in real life, you know exactly where you're at with someone by them either initiating, pursuing you, making a compliment, smiling, trying to follow up. Like, you know, immediately if there's a connection or not. You can meet somebody in the coffee line. You could meet somebody in the supermarket. I literally tell my clients go to Whole Foods because I know most of you are in the US. Go to Whole Foods and go shopping and then ask a man for help. Do not ask for his number. Do never ask a man for his number. I'm shocked when people tell me this. Don't ask him for his number. And I know Janet from 3rd grade now that she's nettled. She did it once and all the happily married. OK to all of the Janet's watching, great for you, but you're the 2%. Don't ask men for the number. Go to Whole Foods, go shopping, and then ask a man that you see in the aisle that you like or maybe even not like, but as a little test or experiment for you. Ask them for help. Ask them all, I can't reach the cranberry juice, do you mind helping me? I can't open the store. I can't reach into the freezer. Whatever it is like. Ask for help. And when you are approachable, this is what a lot of women also don't realize. When you are approachable and you put yourself out there, that's like a man's invitation to pursue and to ask for your number or to initiate and to follow up. If you don't look approachable, you look, take him or you look not interested. So men, sometimes this is when, when, when men feel like she's intimidating, it's not because you're so stunningly, astonishingly, Oh my God, what's that word? Astoundingly, astonishingly, whatever you because you're so pretty and so beautiful, but you're intimidating because of your energy. It's closed off. You know, it's, it's not a good thing. Don't strive for I want to be intimidating. Like strive for being approachable. And men will literally not stop knocking at your door. Because here's the thing, when you approachable, like I said, it's an invitation for men to come after you. And we all know very good examples of this. For example, in the bar when you're just wanting to hang out with your girlfriends, you just want to get a drink and all of a sudden this random dude is making eye contact with you and you smile because you're trying to be nice. OK, you're trying to be nice, but you think in the back of your mind, who is this dude? Like he is not my type. Why is this creep staring at me? But I'm just going to smile because I want to be nice. The law of approachability right there. That's what you did, that's what you used. That psychological law. What happens is 5 minutes later, because you smiled at the random creep standing in the corner eyeing you down, he's going to walk over and buy you drinks. Not because he's a creep, but because you look approachable. So he thinks I've got a chance. So stop doing it subconsciously with men that you don't want to attract and start doing it with men that you do feel attracted to. Be approachable, ask for help, smile, eye contact, become approachable and men will not stop running after you. OK, someone said you're killing it. Leveling Up: How to Handle Workplace Smear Campaigns The HA girls. I love you. This is my first live stream on Twitch screenshot. I'm actually so proud. I'm so happy. I love this. I love talking to you. OK Oh, someone said the word is astonishing. Sorry. OK, thank you. We learned a new word. Yay. OK, somebody else asks what do I do if there's like a smear campaign against me at work? This is something I get asked in my DMSA lot of times as well. And I will tell you this the only way. And I know you're looking for like dark psychology secrets and like boundaries and what can I say and what can I do to protect myself? The only way to protect yourself from a smear campaign at work is to become hotter, more confident, richer, and potentially look for a new job knowing that your current situation is never your final destination. This is why I got to where I am. I used to clean toilets. People don't, people don't know this or people like to forget, you know, because they look at me and they're like, oh, little dumb Blondie influencer girl. She's sitting now talking and yapping like, hey, there's a lot of reasons why I know what I know today. OK, Because I've traveled a lot. I've worked with a lot of men in very dangerous situations as well. And I've been very vulnerable for a long time in my life because I didn't have anything I didn't have like a safe family space I could always back on to and run to. I moved away when I was like 14 from my family. I didn't have a good connection with them. I literally had $10 to my name. I was sleeping in public parks before, like camping in tents even on winter was freezing. I slept in my friend's car before. Like I've been through all of this shit so I understand psychology. I also understand life. I've seen extreme poverty, drugs, crime, all of it and how disgusting and ugly humanity can be. But I've also seen both, and trust me, there is like bad and good on each sides of the spectrum when it comes to money, for example, or success or power or status. There's Asos everywhere in the world. But just like there's bad people, there's a lot of good. And I'm a deep believer that there's more good than evil, but we have to look for it. So back to your question, how can I protect myself from smart campaigns? You level up, you become better. The reason why I am today where I am is because every single job I had, I always knew this is not going to be my final destination and I never settled for workplaces or environments. Other people did. Other people did settle for the shitty nine to five job. Other people were happy cleaning toilets. I always looked around. I thought, how can I get out of this? How can I become rich? How can I make more money? How can I look better? I didn't always look like this. Do you know what I mean? Like I just understood my colors. I learned to go to the gym and look after my body, understood nutrition. And don't get me wrong, I had like a few beers yesterday. I'm on holidays, OK. And then I was like, wait, I'm going live on Twitch tomorrow. This is like kind of a big deal. And I became I just came here. The only preparation I did was do my hair and makeup and have a cute dress on. That's it. But your energy needs to be committed. OK, so even in the workforce, I feel like I sometimes started doing literally only the bare minimum, but was asked for me in my work, I would only show up on time then leave on time. Like I just and I didn't really ever look for friends at my work too. I work for a very famous beauty brand in Australia. I need to be careful because this is Twitch. So I feel like this is different in a long form stream what I'm saying because I give away a lot of juicy tea and then people are going to clip it and they're going to put it on Instagram and TikTok and then someone's going to from an old company, see what I'm talking about. So I'm like, OK, let's keep things confidential here. But a very big beauty brand in Australia, and it was very toxic. It was extremely toxic, OK. And it didn't make friends there. And they hated me and they singled me out as well. But I always looked at them and I thought, one day I'm going to be gone here. One day I'm going to be gone. I'm going to be a very different place to all of you. You're judging me now, OK, You don't like me now, like whatever. But one day I'm just going to walk in here as a whole different person. I'm going to be a customer. And guess what happened? So the only way to protect yourself from a smear campaign, you become better, you level up, you don't compare, you don't think of pleasing them or changing the narrative. They already hate you. They don't care about you. You can't now fix how they see you. You can't change the narrative they're spreading. If not, it's false. OK, the smear campaign is probably false, but as soon as you kind of try to justify or explain yourself, you fall beneath them because now they have psychological power over you that you're trying to live up to. If you just become better and you say let them talk, the real people that like you and are authentic as well, they will catch up. They will. It takes a while, OK? It takes a while. I had people in my life say to me like, Oh my God, I really believe this and this person spreading rumors around you. But now six months later, I see the truth. And that's actually a horrible person. And they sometimes come to me. I swear to God I had people in my life come to me with tears in their eyes and guilt. And they said, I'm so sorry that I supported this person that was going against you, but I forgive them. I don't care. I'm like, I don't need your support now. I needed it back in the day when I had people going up against me. And you weren't loyal as a friend, you know, so, so see how people, it's so funny, like life's perception, the people who don't support you and all of a sudden switch sides. They're either an enemy or not a true friend. Or maybe they need to take some time because the manipulator also pulled the wool over their face. Have some grace with people, people not the smartest. They need to learn on their own, you know, And when they come crawling back and they apologize, take it. Take the apology, but always sleep with one eye open. I feel like my phone is going to die any second. How can I change that? Here is my charger. All right one second I need to oops. Oh my God, what's happening here now how can I change this? Oh, I just swipe left to close. I just completely oh, here we go. This is so fun. I really like long format stuff because on TikTok I normally or Instagram I Yep, for like 10 seconds, you know like short videos and this is like long form and it's really really fun. I like it. OK, Also my Twitch ladies, I just want to ask, can you hear me when I put the mic here? Because we're going to go shortly into the reviews of YouTube and couples, Tom Hollands and Daya, all of that. So I need my hands to maybe type and click and change some things. So for all of the Twitch ladies, can you hear me when I put the mic here? If not, please let me know. OK, I'll hold it here. But can being extradited effective women's image as a high value woman? Balancing Extroversion with a High-Value, Mysterious Aura OK very good question. Can being extroverted affect the image of a woman that wants to be perceived as high value? I am the most extroverted person that you will ever come across. You don't understand, like we're on holidays in Croatia and I almost feel like I know the entire island. I talk to every single waiter. I talk to every single person staff like cleaners, whatever. I buy them drinks. I'm like, let's hang out together. Here's a shot for you. Like I just love making friends with people. I love it. Like I'm so, so, so, so social. And funnily enough, therefore a lot of doors open in my life too. Because you need to learn how to network. And I don't care. Because I don't care how much value a person can give me. Because if you only look at networking as being a social climber, you're already lost in life. Because it's very superficial and I don't think it's good karma for you. I generally like to network also with people who can't give me much, who have lesser than me. Because I like exchange. I'm very social now. Does this go against my belief of blackhead energy and high value woman? And I will tell you this, you need to know when to shut up. You need to know when to not speak and you need to know when to speak. And so of course, if you're always like happy, go lucky and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, then in like in every second of the day in any social setting, of course, you're losing a little bit of your magnetism, You're losing a little bit of that mysteric aura, your energy, because it's just very out there, you know, and you're bubbly and you just talk about everything night and day. And you're just an open book. You can still be high energy and socialize and open, but not talk about your life, your deepest darkest secrets. Always talk about yourself, always laugh at every single single joke. And This is why I'm going to give an experiment as a extra lated girl, extroverted girl. It's so interesting when I go a little bit more quiet, people immediately notice because they're not used to it as much. And then that to me is an affirmation of how attuned people are with your psyche and your mood and your energy, which you kind of want, right? Because if people don't care about you, they don't care about your mood. But if people care about you, they do care about your mood. So here's an experiment for all of the extroverted ladies. The next time you go a little bit more quiet. And I'm not talking about Debbie Downer. Oh, my God, I'm so quiet. Oh, my God. I'm having such a shit day. Just stay for yourself a little bit more, you know, just talk a little less. People will, will ask, is everything all right? Like, are you good? And, like, what's going on? You're so quiet. And then you don't lean further into it. You brush it off and you say, yeah, yeah, everything's fine. Sorry I'm just so busy, my mind is like elsewhere right now. So the more you become unpredictable and people can't read you, the more power you have over their psyche too. This is also what you can do with men to somewhat guilt trip or manipulate them a little bit. If you're grateful for every single gift he gives you, grateful for every single flower, grateful for the tiniest bare minimum, you become the golden retriever. If every now and then you're not overly happy and overly pleasing and overly grateful and overly oh and excitement and big eyes and big smile, I'm so grateful and I love you so much. If every now and then you're a little bit more reserved, you say, oh OK, thank you. Like if you just a little, you know your energy is different, he will notice it straight away. This is how you condition people. You don't condition them by telling them how you feel and what they don't do and how they should perceive. You don't tell them. You do it through psychology. You do it through body language. You do it through gestures. Understanding Male Lust, Dating Intentions, and Self-Focus OK, so many questions on Twitch. Hi Anna. What do you think about when a man's For You page is full of naked woman trash? I would personally break up because it's disrespectful. Look, I have so many. I have so many like split answers to this because it depends on what you want. If you're dating for marriage, that's probably not marriage material. At the same time, I truly believe there's not one perfect person out there speaking about myself too, you know? Like we all have our like issues. The sooner we realize men are just a little bit more torn to that like lust than we are as women, the quicker we can almost forgive it. And don't twist my words and give me a shit storm and tell me Oh my God Anna you're making excuses for men that are being promiscuous. Not really. I'm not making excuses. I'm just saying it's kind of in their nature though, you know what I mean? And I'm not telling you this to then kiss a man's ass and always turn a blind eye when he's behaving like trash. But I'm trying to make you achieve a mindset of being above it, genuinely not pretending, not pretending and turning a blind eye when Justin surprise cheats on you for the fifth time. But if Justin likes a girl's photo and she's beautiful, that you don't immediately have yourself worth crushed. But if you see it's a pattern and Justin always likes other women's photos and then slides into the DMS and on top of it his for you pages full of naked woman, you probably have the wrong values. But then you got to also ask yourself, which men are you dating? Are you dating men for their looks? Because men who look good, they think they're on top of the pyramid. They think they're better than even good looking women because they're competing with women overlooks. Men should never do that. Men should compete with a woman's happiness, right? And then a man coming into that Woman's World, that's really what you should measure a relationship on. Is a man gonna add to my life or am I better off alone? Not which hot guy can I get? Like this dude is so strong and so hot. Like, I understand that there is like from a biological perspective for women, we want to feel safe. We're attracted to big men, like muscles, whatever. But you need to look for comparability and also a man that treats you right, that you can see as the father of your children. OK. What if a man leaves you all of a sudden going abroad and you, you want more worthy. You want more worthy and it leaves you confused, hurt and anxious about you, about your worth. What if a man leaves you all of a sudden going abroad and you are anxious? OK. I mean, we need to get a life, ladies. OK, If a man all of a sudden leaves you and goes abroad, I mean, I don't know enough of the circumstances. Is that after you were dating? Is that after you've been together and married for 20 years? I don't know. Is it because he's going on holidays? Or is it because he generally broke up with you and left you? Either way, get busy. Level up. Always, always, always, always level up. If a man leaves, another one will come into your lure, into your life, into your world. Being an Authentic Role Model: Online vs. Real Life OK. Oh, this is a cute question. I like being asked personal questions. Hold on, do you feel responsibility to be good role model when you have so many followers or not? This is a really good question. You know what, I'm going to try to be as honest as possible because there's a lot of fake gurus out there who will say I feel so responsible, but then do the absolute opposite. You know, for me, because I feel I've always been very honest with people in terms of sometimes I have a drunk cigarette, you know, But at the same time I will tell you things like if you're a smoker, you can't attract like a high value man because it's like a dirty, dirty behavior. But at the same time, I'll have a drunk cigarette when I'm on holidays in Italy. So I feel like I've always been very honest about me and my life and where I've come from and my struggles and issues I've been facing and the imperfectionist characteristics of myself that people who are in the community, who are my followers know that if I all of a sudden, let's let's flip it on the set, if I would be somebody that's super performative, not only show a little bit of my life and I don't show you that I'm also not perfect. And it's like based on the wrong values because all I ever wanted was money and followers and status. And then all of a sudden something truthful comes out about me that would be much worse, right? So I feel like there's not too much of scarcity or intimidation to needing to be a super good role model because I don't ever want to lose myself in that sense. What I'm trying to say is a lot of people who build the following, they're trying to please the audiences and their public image so much that their own life suffers behind the scenes because of it. You know, because everything's performative. Where I always put my own life, my friends, my family first. I put Anna Christina, I put her first, and I want to be a good role model to people in my life. In real life, when I walk into a room that's very important to me. I want to be a good role model. But online, how I'm perceived, I can't control it. I can only like really put out there who I am already behind closed doors if I'm not lied for it online, I don't get intimidated by that. I don't care if people don't like me. So I'm not really. I'm not really. Yeah. I don't know. I don't think about it too much and it's not really that important for me. It's important to be a good person, but on and off the screen and followers, knock on board. Obviously I'm very grateful for what I've built, but I don't know. I also feel that I'm not really intimidated by numbers. And Oh my God, so many people are watching and Oh my God, this is happening and I've got so many followers and therefore my responsibility is growing. Actually the opposite. I think that your responsibility for being a good person, having the right values and being a good role model as a woman to younger women around you should always be your priority and something important to do whether you have a following or not. Following is just, it's just a digit. It's just a number. Don't change your perception around people just because they all of a sudden have status. Are they a good person in real life? You know, that's really what you can, where you measure someone. This is why someone's integrity, someone's character. And This is why I love meeting people in real life. And the number one thing I always see when I see people in real life, they say you're so much nicer in person. You're so much nicer. And then I'm like, wait, but like, I'm trying to be nice online too. But they're just like, well, but you know, you give advice and like, it's sometimes very blunt, but like I just always connect with people and followers when I see them in real life because it's very important to me. I probably connect more with people in real life than online. So anyway, I just, this is really interesting. I could really reflect on this for a while. Very great question. Thank you so much for asking. I started getting my nails done to femur, femur and also something to do when I feel alone. But sometimes I miss my husband's affection quality time. Get a dog, get a dog. If you miss affection quality time, you don't have enough of it in your life. Cuddle your girlfriends, have a pajama sleepover with your girlfriends. Get a little dog. Try to. Some people are just naturally a little bit more needy. If you fall into that category, try to soothe your need for closeness through something else. Otherwise the other person will always have so much power over you. And then it can hurt a lot when that person leaves and who suffers from it? Not the other person, but you. Dissecting the Viral New York Rooftop Couple So it's a bit unfair on you, you know. OK, ladies, shall we go into the reviews and can you answer me on Twitch about about the mic? Because I will put the mic here. If you're watching this on TikTok, come to my Twitch so you can see me live. And you can now see who I'm going to review because I'm going to be reviewing the live. No, hold on. The couple from the New York engagement situation. I really want to see that. I really want to see live with you what happened there. OK, leaving the chat open now. Let's swap over. I'm so excited. OK, Can everyone on Twitch see this? Yes. Great. OK let's play it. I'm going to put on mute and while I'm playing it I'm going to say goodbye to TikTok. I love you all so much. Come to Twitch and watch us live there to review all of the most interesting couples of the last two weeks. Bye bye everyone. Not me multitasking. This is so funny. OK, so we are seeing the by row New York Empire sale building couple that climbed on. Is it the Empire State Building? Yeah, it is. And I love that she has like a blackhead mask on as well. She's a badass. It's so funny. Like I immediately look at her like I'm a girl's girl. I love women. I'm just like, wow, she climbed that. Like that's why That's crazy. But what is everyone's comments about this couple? I have not too much look into their relationship. What I've seen is that they're also two creators, influencers. They do have a big following online too. I think it's great marketing. They also have their own Netflix movie. So there is already, you know, like it just fuse their brand. It is very on brand for them and it's very smart because now people who didn't know them, including myself, all of a sudden do know them because of what they did. I think it's, I think it's a really cool thing to do. No notes, no notes. It's literally just a really cool thing to do. It's really cute as well. It's very adrenaline. Oops. I don't want to change that. OK, let's pause here. What happens if I click on this? There's more. Speaker 2 Citizens below just walking. Speaker 1 That's just wild though. Oh girls, for the next for the next live stream, I need to get YouTube Premium. I am so sorry you have to watch ads with me. But you know what's really funny? I kind of feel lucky like Justin Bieber when he was at Coachella and he was just sitting there and chilling with his laptop on YouTube. And I also think Justin Bieber Coachella also didn't have YouTube Premium. So even Justin made you watch ads. So I'm sorry, but here we are. Same thing with me, but let's close this. Tom Holland & Zendaya: A Masterclass in Relationship Dynamics I want to get to one of my favorite, favorite couples in the world, Tom Holland and Zendaya, the ultimate black cat. Go on the Trevor Copper. I love these two so much. And why is he go on the Trevor? Why is she the black cat? Let's analyze their relationship a little bit. Also body language on the red carpet shall we? He's just a good guy. Like I genuinely am a big fan of both of them so much. I love Zendaya. Do you say Zendaya or Zendaya? I mean look at her she looks like an actual goddess. This makeup as well is insane. Like no words stunning and you can tell that this man is proud of being with her. This is something that is so so, so so important that you remember that a man needs to be proud to be with you. As soon as a man starts hiding you, not posting you and it's being weird and makes excuses like that's the biggest red flag. And I give you examples later in a minute as well of how not to do it or when to leave a man after what he said. What are some signs that he isn't proud of being with you? OK, we're going to get into that in a second as well. She's a powerhouse too. Like she's a very independent woman that at the same time is very feminine with him. Both of them has very like masculine and feminine traits. It's a really good balance. If you see them sitting next to each other. Sometimes she's literally like the wide legged woman and she sits quite masculine. And then he's like with his little crossed legs, but it's fine because then in other scenarios he's very masculine. And that's that's what it comes down to. There's nothing wrong with a man that is a little bit more on the feminine side. There's nothing wrong with a woman. There's a little bit more on the masculine side and what is important is that when we interact right, the whole relationship dynamic, when it comes down to non negotiable moments like for example protection, there's a threat organization planning. We should as a couple in relationships always revert to our more natural state. So for example, a man even though he's more on the feminine side should in in a situation of a threat always go and lean into his masculine of protection. If a man is a little bit more feminine, like Tom Holland for example, he's also a little bit smaller than her. He is very softly spoken. I would argue he's more on the feminine side as a man right? But he's a great guy. You don't need to always go for the hyper masculine crazy alpha dudes because usually they might be lacking masculine energy in moments where it's important, like for example, loyalty, integrity, honesty, right? Important skill sets or attributes of or characteristics of masculine energy. And Tom Holland exceeds in all of them. Like for example, in this video, he watched these photos that are going to show up. This is a little bit older. How long is this ago? One year ago. OK, so they're having date night, they're matching in their outfits and then that is completely swarmed by paparazzi and he just gets in there and makes way for her. I think this is the video. I did a little bit of research. OK, I came prepared. I hope this is the right 1 though. Speaker 2 They're matching date night looks. Speaker 1 OK, first of all, they're so stunning together. His eyes are always on her. He leads her. He has her hand. He goes into his masculine, like, look how you know, like, not dominant, but like, he's a leader. He protects her. She's like swampa paparazzo. And he comes and grabs her hand. He's like, girl, I got you, let's get you out of here. It is so attractive. And I just love them together. I'm matching. I'm matching with my favorite couple. But yeah, she is the reward and he is just happy to be her and be on her side. But they're two very good people. I think they share the same values as well and belief systems, which is also really important because the polarity between feminine, masculine is very important for your relationship. Yes, but you got to be compatible. If you're not compatible, then also doesn't work. And I'm not saying you always need to listen to the same music. You always need to have the same opinion. You always need to do this. But there needs to be still similarities. There needs to be a connection. Otherwise how are you ever going to connect with someone when you're always disagreeing, you know? OK, so that's them. What else is there? Yeah, that's just photos of them. I just love them. He is another one at the Odyssey premiere. They all look so good. Speaker 3 How did you get that to light? Speaker 1 Up. There's a battery in here somewhere. Speaker 3 Everybody came to play today. Speaker 1 Yes, yes, we understood. They all look so good the. Speaker 3 Odyssey's global tour kicked off in London today. Zendaya's bold look was fresh off Schiaparelli's Paris Fashion Week runway. Speaker 1 Yeah, this is insane. Insane. Speaker 3 Ethereal number by Valentin. Speaker 1 Here we go, the name. Speaker 3 Shakes everybody's hand. Speaker 1 There are a few actors that can do it as well as she can, and I love watching her do it. I. Speaker 3 Also heard you'd love to do a ROM com with your wife next. Speaker 1 You know when I'm trying to go to bed at night while I'm thinking about his movies and what could we do? And that's how my brain works. Speaker 3 By the way, have we looked? Speaker 1 At so cute I'm like staring at him weirdly. I'm looking at his ass right now. I shouldn't do that. Speaker 3 Got to ask you, do you send Ben pictures of you right now and say bro you see me now? Speaker 1 No, he's, I said, OK, pause here. So can you see even in the interviews how highly they speak of each other? And they're both very successful actors. And she's done a career outside of him. He's delivered a career outside of her. They're sharing their success. They're not competing with each other. And especially men, like some men feel so triggered by women's success. But he doesn't like, he is not triggered by her at all. He's mostly admiring her. Every time she comes into the red carpet. He's like twisting. He's like tits. And day arrives, like, what's going on? Where is she? He loves this woman. OK, reason I paused here is because, and I got so much shit for a TikTok I've uploaded where I basically spoke about Anne Hathaway and Tom Holland at this premiere. It's actually from this clip I think as well. They were standing together. She's pregnant. So congratulations, which is beautiful, you know? But they were standing together and Tom home basically says, Oh my God, I feel always so awkward. I don't know what to do with my hands. And then she's like, oh, let me hold it. And of course, between them, she's pregnant, she's married, she's he's married. Like, it's fine. But sometimes I like to use examples just for real life people like you and me to understand the example a little bit better and to have visuals. And when a man next to you says, I don't know what to do with my hands and that man is your best friend's or close friend's husband, you as a woman don't take his hand. Do you know what I mean? Like, you don't do that. You say we'll put him into your pocket. Honey, do whatever you need to be aware when you date a man that treats you well, he will automatically become more important and is also going to be placed on the pedestal. His market value is going to go up for other women too. No, I'm not saying and Heather way it's going to now all of a sudden snap up Tom Holland. But I'm saying for you watching that, I want to give the advice to I'm not talking to these people. You know, I mean like they don't care, but I'm talking to you about understanding. If you have a man that treats you right, do not brag about it. Don't post about it. Keep it secret. Just be happy. Just be grateful because the more you will boast him up how great he is, you will attract other promiscuous women who might take him away from you. Because women don't really respect commitments in marriage as much as men do. Oh my God, Anna, this is something so bad to say. What do you mean by this? Well, men have this like bro code territorial sort of thing where they know if their dude, their guy friend, their brother, their cousin, their neighbor, another man has a woman, they won't touch that woman. You know, not in all cases. Of course, there's always a 2%, but it's like a no go. And for women, and we all know this. We all know it because we've seen it in real life. I'm not telling you fairy tales for women. A man that treats another woman good in their relationship and is perceived as a good partner will become more of a target for other women. All of a sudden he's more on their radar than when he was single because they see he's a good partner. And good male partners are rare. And when we go back to like Stone Age times or whatever, that's just how it was. Like, women would fight over or compete over the best man who is the strongest and probably has the best, I don't know, genes to protect them and shelter them. So they're for survival and also for, you know, the children and everything. So yeah, just a little reminder, If you have a good guy, don't become a golden retriever and tell the whole world how great he is. Just be grateful. Just keep it closed. Do it for your own sake. Do it for your relationship. The evil eye is real. People become jealous. And that's the lesson here. Dua Lipa & Callum Turner: When Men Change for Love OK, next we have these two. What do we think about dual leaper and column? So these two are interesting. I love them together. I think she's a blackhead. He's a golden retriever, 100%. Again, a man. He's a very feminine, but I think there is a soft side to him and he doesn't play about her. There's once again the same dynamic that he just likes her a little bit more and lets her shine and is proud to be with her and want like look how how lost he looks alone on the red carpet. Like he feels so confident and happy and like a reward being next to her. She's the dream girl for sure. And you know, what's really, really interesting is if we pause here and I have not found the actual clip, let's see if it's this one. I really want to play this. Callum Turner's ex-girlfriend says on this podcast that he never posted her or always said like, oh, I don't want paparazzi photos and everything. I don't want to be seen in photos. I'm just so private. But now he's literally at the Met Gala with Dua Lipa. Like, they're always at the red carpet together. They're so happy, you know, taking photos together and all of it. But back in the day with his ex-girlfriend, it wasn't the case. So that's super interesting too. So let's quickly TuneIn and listen to this. I hope, Oh my God, excuse me. I hope this is the right snippet. Let's have a look. Oh my God they met. My ex-boyfriend is now engaged to someone who they He met her while he was having dinner with me. Speaker 2 Everyone's talking about how perfect Dua Lipa and Callum Turner look together, but the timeline? Yeah, that's where things start getting messy. Because here's the part people can't ignore. His ex is claiming he literally met Dua while they were still together. Not at a party, not months later, but at the same dinner. Imagine. Speaker 1 Nothing necessarily wrong with that. OK, I'm just going to say nothing necessarily wrong with that. At the same time, it opens your eyes as a woman to no men are men. They see another woman and it could always be a potential future partner. That's just how the brain works and that's what happened here too. That also doesn't mean that you as a partner need to now always be sleeping with one eye open, thinking, Oh my God, I'm going to lose this man. Just stay focused on yourself. Make sure you're confident, make sure you get your nails, your hair done, you look good, you have a good life. You have a life that you're happy with. Also without a man potentially in it. And that's how you hold. Amen. Not by being clingy and desperate and saying I'm going to lose him to another woman while at the same time being smart enough to understand my male psychology. And clearly, Callum Turner met Dual Leaper while he was on a date with Victoria. It's just what happened. But you never know. Maybe they just became friends in the beginning, whatever, and then they broke up. But let's continue watching, because there's a few things I want to analyze here with you. Speaker 2 Across from your boyfriend, and that's the moment he meets the person he ends up engaged to. Speaker 1 Like she sat next to us at this restaurant in London. Whatever, but so which is crazy. Speaker 2 That's not just awkward, that's brutal. Now technically nothing has been confirmed as cheating, but the way this story lines up, it definitely raises eyebrows. According to what's being said, Callum was in a very private relationship before Dua. Like no social media, no public appearances, no celebrity events. Speaker 1 He wouldn't let me post photos of us together on Instagram because he respected our relationship so much that he was like, I, you know, this is so safe for me. He. Speaker 2 Apparently didn't want anything. Speaker 1 Pause, pause, pause. OK, and this is the exact snippet I wanted to show you. She says he never wanted to post anything because the relationship was so private and he wanted to respect their privacy. Meanwhile, now with his future wife, the dream girl, Dua Lipa, he's always at the red carpet, he's always at the Met Gala. So what is the difference? And the difference is that he never liked her, the ex-girlfriend or loved her enough that it activated the mescaline instinct to fully pursue fully own fully. I don't want to say ownership and the territorial, but I know it's toxic. People going to say, I know you can't talk about this because it's just psychology and you're making it toxic. But I'm sorry, man, Just work that way. They they are territorial of you. They want to somewhat own you, possess you. This is what obsession is about. If a mentally loves you, he wants to show the world like I'm with her, you know, like they're proud. Look at Tom Holland and Zendaya. Now look at Come Turn and Dooley. But that's just what it is. If a man tells you I don't really want to like, post photos together and I'm so private, Really. Really. What are you hiding? You're not. You're probably keeping your options open and you're kind of keeping the relationship private because you're keeping an eye out for another woman. That's what I'm thinking. That's what I'm thinking anyway. OK girls, keep the chat open on Twitch. I want to see all of your questions now. Let's continue here. And I want to hear your feedback on this as well, by the way, for me. Speaker 2 He apparently didn't want anything to do with fame like that, and yet now he's engaged to one of the biggest pop stars in the world. That's the part that's confusing people, because it's not just he moved on, it's that he completely switched lifestyles. The same guy who supposedly hated Pop Perazzi is now out in Paris arguing with photographers and. Speaker 1 When a man loves you, he's willing to change. When a man loves you, he will literally move countries. There's a lot of men who say, for example, I would never leave my hometown, not for a woman, not this, not that. When a man truly loves you, trust me, they will do anything. They will change their lifestyles, they will change careers, they will do anything. It's almost like they yearn for the type of woman. Not a lot of women activate this type of trigger in Mendel, but they yearn for a woman that actually puts them on their knees and they think I would do anything for her. Once they find a woman like that, they then do anything for her. And that's the type of woman you want to become. But you only become the type of woman. But you don't care about them. You almost want to be so out of their league. You want to be so just when you walk into the room and this man sees you, he's just blind and he's in awe. He thinks how is this person real? You know, like that you want to shock them with you aura, your energy, your beauty and mystery as well. Always leave him guessing more seducing with all of your senses. And I, I promise you, even though men say I would not move countries, I will not change my career. I have all of these standards and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. That's just their male ego and they're set in their ways. They, I deeply believe this. They secretly yearn for a woman to come into the world and completely blow them away. For them to then all of a sudden become soft in the knees and say I would move countries for you, I would change my life for you. They actually need that. It's almost like an instinct for them to all of a sudden they level up, they look better. They all of a sudden change careers. They become more wealthy. A lot of men who are good men who find the love of their lives, who then they commit to and adapt to the woman and center the woman. Usually their life changes for the better because having a stable relationship and having a Good Wife on your side can change a man's life for the better. And they secretly all yearn for that. But of course with all of the toxic videos and toxic masculinity. But then on the other hand, very feminine man. Like there's so many different narratives out there and This is why they don't they believe themselves. They believe themselves. Callum Turner probably believed himself when he said I want to have a private life, I don't want any paparazzi, blah blah blah until Dua Lipa completely blew him off. Oh, wait, not that way. Oh my goodness. Is that how you say it? Jesus. Sorry. Until she blew him away. Not blew him off. Oh, this is funny. OK, can you do me like everyone watching? Can you clip some stuff? I want to see what that looks like. I want to have some clips that I can then rewatch on TikTok. Can you do that? I don't know how you do it. I feel like that would be really fun. Reading Intentions, Men on Vacation, and Embracing Singleness OK anyway. But yeah, so if a man who loves you, he's willing to change. Let's keep watching this in the background without audio while I'm reading the comments. You have an interesting way of thinking from a psychological perspective, based on external expressions, how a person speaks and so on. Have you heard of a science called kinetic intelligence? It's also an interesting way to judge a person by their gestures, body language, how they behave, hold themselves and so on. I think this isn't given enough attention. What's your opinion on this? Never heard of it, Sounds about right. I don't like to over intellectualize a lot of things because in the end of the day, you can. You can read a person by the micro expressions. If you just read a person by the gestures and what they say, but you don't listen to in between the lines, you can't really read them because people hide their intentions behind their words. Somebody can tell you you're so beautiful, but the intention is to make themselves feel good about themselves, that they're such a good person telling you these compliments. Somebody could do something for free for you, only to then maybe a day later ask for something in return. The intention matters and a lot of people have selfish intentions. You know, This is why people are so thrown off who when they meet people who are selfless because it's very rare in this world. I would say I have a big selfless part to me, but it's a, it's a good balance. Like I am very selfish, but in a way that I would never hurt somebody in the progress of me putting myself first, you know? And here comes a new ad. But yeah, this is, by the way, this is the podcast episode. I think I'm going to do TikTok about this as well. And now that we have basically covered some of the YouTube stuff, which, you know, this is new, doing some live analysis, I really want to hear for you for the future, what other stuff you want to hear more about. OK, let's go back to this. This is better now I really hear more. I want to hear more from you in the future. Other type of couples, I can analyse more YouTube live analysis like whatever it is, please let me know because I really want to review more couples live and I can also do more research on it. I can bring a whole topic on it. I mean, this is my first dream. So I'm still working with the whole switching screens as well. And maybe it's better if I review just the photos and then I come with the topic and I can present it to you. You know, if you do like the video reviews as well, let me know. Message me on my Instagram, message me on Take Talk, message me on Twitch. Like, please let me know what you want to see more of so I can attend to that and I can really improve the streams. I can answer all of your questions and all of it. So I want to just get a little bit more into questions. So why don't we do another round of questions in AQ and A. So keep your questions coming through my loves and we can get started on the Q&A. Actually, I'm going to open my Instagram now because we do have so many questions on my Q&A here. How to behave when a man is on vacation with his friends. You let him go, he's on vacation and you go on vacation with your girls. If a man is on vacation without you, you can't control it. So I don't understand the question. OK, think about this, how do you behave while he's on vacation? We should be thinking how does he behave? What's he doing? Why is he on vacation without you? Why is he on the boys trip? OK, how old are we? Any contacts? Are we 14 or are we in our 40s with children? Married? Either way, I'm a big believer to focus so much on yourself and keep yourself busy that you don't even need to think about what's he doing. It's probably good you don't know what he's doing. There's not much to say to that, you know, because look, I'm, I feel like I am a coach, but I'm not a therapist. And a therapist would tell you about all of these different strategies to regulate yourself, to heal yourself, to become more confident and all of these things. But if a man is on vacation without you, let him be. Let him be. Get busy, focus on yourself, maybe go on vacation with the girls. That's it. You will never be able to control his behavior, what he's doing over there, ever. He could be hooking up with someone. He could be having a foursome. You will never find it out. Or maybe you do, but then you know it already happened anyway. So instead of sitting at home and wasting your own time and your own life thinking about what is this guy doing on a boy's trip, why don't you level up? Why don't you focus on yourself? Why don't you build a life outside of the relationship? So if one day he definitely all of a sudden is promiscuous and he cheats, it's never a loss to you. You know, relationship and breakups and betrayal and cheating. It only hurts because you overcompensated to begin with because you were sitting at home while he's on boys vacation and you think, Oh my God, Well, you know, I don't know what to do. I need to ask Anna what's he's going to do on when he's on holidays. And therefore you wasted so much mental energy and time, maybe even money on this man that then when he leaves you, you feel like you need to seek revenge or there's a deficit. There's so much unfairness. Women who put themselves first the entire time, they don't feel that because I think, well, it's not a loss because I always put into myself, OK, what else is there? I've been single most of my life. I had a few short relationships. Do you think that's a bad thing? A woman once told me was weird and that I might have a problem. What do you think? I don't think that's weird. I don't think you have a problem. I think the woman judging you and labeling you for not having a lot of relationships is weird. OK, because I think it's a good thing to focus on yourself and obviously being single. It depends on what you do when you're single. If you're being promiscuous and you only sleep around and you kind of like out there to have fun, I'm not a big fan of that. Even though the media likes to push that. I don't, I don't think that's good for women to just sleep around and have fun. Like, I'm not going to judge it. Whatever you want to do, whatever you floats your boat, okay. But I'm not going to tell you to do that actively to pursue that and go down that path. I think it's a bad idea. I think being single and just not having met your person and then trialling, experimenting with relationships and trying to commit to someone. You have a short relationship maybe didn't work because you didn't align. You're getting to know yourself a little bit more. You understand what men are like. There's nothing wrong with that ever. Like why? Why would that be? Why would that be bad? There's people that are single for like 10 years. You need to ask yourself why you feel insecure about it because you never said you're insecure about it. But I can read it by how you said the question, how you worded it. Maybe you're longing for connection and you're longing for a deep committed relationship. That could be the case, you know, But then maybe the question needs to be different. Maybe the question should be, how can I find my person and make it last? And the answer to that would be become selfish first and build your life first. Become the woman that you think your dream partner would fall in love with and then go on to the right places where your dream partner would be hanging around and be approachable. Make sure you level up, go on to these places, feel good, be confident, be approachable, smile eye contact and try to attract people to you rather than you seeking commitment and love. From Situationship to Relationship: Affirmations and Logic OK another question Hey I'm I'm dating a guy where is 6 months in a situation trip. He's based in the US and I'm in the Philippines. He's 30 I'm 26. What's your advice for us? He's honest with me that he's saving money to visit me here in the pH but not now while we're not meeting yet. What do you think is the best way to assign from not replying on him immediately or answering his calls? Me blackhead woman, please. I'm dating a guy Six months situation ship. So that's not great. Six months situation ship. He's based in the US and I'm in the Philippines. So you already have long distance, but it's not even a relationship yet. It's a situation ship and it's long distance. It takes a lot of commitment from two people to make that work. He's 30, I'm 26. What's the advice for us to last? Well, first, get into a relationship above a situationship. He's honest with me that he's saving money to visit me in the Philippines. How do you know he's honest? And when you say situationship and don't answer me this because this is confidential and I want you to reflect on this yourself. When you say situationship, what does it mean? What is the exchange of your relationship or situationship? Sorry, what? How is what is that established on? Do you send him mutes? Do you text everyday? Do you FaceTime? Do you have telephone sex? Or is it genuinely a deep connection of 3-4 hours of calls talking about family, upbringing, getting to know each other? So it's this is something that happens a lot these days that a lot of women confuse a man's lustful behavior. I'm not saying you're doing it, but just came to mind. A lot of women confuse a man's lustful behavior and pursuit of lust with real connection. Just because he's asking you for nude and he's Facetiming you and then it turns promiscuous, it does not mean that he likes you, neither does it mean that he's going to soon ask you to be his girlfriend or you're establishing a connection. There's no chase for him in it other than sexual chase. There's no reward in being with you. There's no value for him in this relationship, neither for you to be honest. But I'm trying to explain his perspective because the chase is over. He already got access to you and your family and energy and your physical energy and your sexual energy. So there's no, there's no way to bond because men bond different to women. Men need testosterone and dopamine. Excuse me? And best suppressant to bond with a woman, How do they release it in their brain? It's a neurotransmitter that's being released by facing difficult challenges. You know the challenge if you FaceTime him naked? Do affirmations work millwork for self love? Yes it can. I do like doing it as well. But you gotta have a certain energy and consciousness about it. You can't just stand in front of the mirror and say I'm so beautiful, I'm so confident and read it out loud, like a little monologue, like you gotta stand in front of the mirror. I put music on, I put a face mask on, I have my glass of wine. I'm just like, I'm beautiful. I'm confident. But how many times did I even tell you this on this stream? I'm so confident. I like saying it. I believe in it so deeply. It makes me happy when I say it because I'm like I'm so proud of myself. I love myself. How many times in this almost 2 hour stream that I say I'm so proud of myself, I'm so happy, I'm so excited, I'm so confident. I say these little affirmations unconsciously already just throughout my day because I believe them so much. So just remember that yourself talk, yes, is extremely important, but you got to believe the self talk. You truly have to embody it on every single cell in your body. OK, How do you react or solve when you're going to make right choices in life? Should you say that to him? Hold on. Should you follow your heart or your head? Always follow your head. Just remember that there's also something called intuition. We as women have usually a pretty good intuition about things and we can listen to that because that's somewhat like your gut instinct. You know, it's like a warning signal. But I would say follow your head. Don't follow your heart because your heart can be guest lighting you a little, you know, because your heart is probably more so your inner child sort of knocking on the door saying, hey, please love me or let's do the spontaneous trip to see the sky across the world. Just to be long, just to accept, to be accepted, to be loved. And then your heart is like, this would feel so good. Where really it's your unfulfilled desires from inner child. And it's not logical at all, you know, And I'm not saying don't have fun. Like I'm the first one to have fun. I'm the first one I have full. Like I'm so full of adrenaline, riding the jet ski, being on the boat, dancing, like I don't even need alcohol for this. I'm just full of energy. I like doing things, I love being spontaneous. I like doing trips last minute. I like following my intuition and like my gut instinct of this feels right. Like I just want to do this with love and romantic connections. You're already like blinded a little bit. You can't really think. It's almost like you're on drugs. So listen to your head, not your heart. Feminine Routines, Handling Narcissists, and Becoming a Black Cat Can you tell us about your daily routine, what you do every morning and every evening? Every morning I do a little gorgeous on my face. I put moisturizer on my body. I massage my body because like lymphatic drainage because I feel like it's nice to feel myself. I don't know, it sounds weird, but like I just like it's like a grounding thing for me. I also listen to my body, what I want to do for movement. I usually do like one of three. I go for a walk or I run or I gym. And I literally just got my period this morning. Excuse me, lots of information but I just feel a little bit rundown. We had so many birthday celebrations, there was lots of drinking and everything. I'm just feeling a little bit tired. So this morning I actually said the whole time before I'm going live on Twitch, I really want to go to the gym because the gym makes me probably the happiest. It's my favorite workout routine. Pilates and stuff is also good. But like the gym for me to become stronger and to build muscle and everything OK. But the gym is like my favorite type of movement form and I get dopamine from it like nothing else. Like I feel so strong, I feel so good. I've become so confident and I really wanted to do before the Twitch stream. So I have energy and I woke up and I'm like, there's no chance I could go to the gym. So my morning routine is different depending on how I feel, which is also very feminine to do. It's very masculine to always stick to the same thing. And I need to run, I need to lose weight, I need to look good. How does your body feel? There's also different types of your cycle, right? Like when you're on your period, maybe just going for a walk is nice. So I went for a walk, I got some breakfast for us and it was beautiful. And then I went on Twitch and I did my makeup and it was very slow and connected. Then I usually do a swim or sauna or something to just, I don't know, get it off my hand. And then I shower, put my makeup on, and then I get into work. I start with emails, which that's new. I used to always just to content because I've got the most energy in the morning. I always do my videos in the morning. And then my business just blew up. Like I need to do so many things now and I've got so many clients and it's just like crazy busy, busy, busy. So I do emails 1st and then I do content. But yeah, that's kind of my routine. And in the evening I somewhat do the same thing. I finish off with a hot shower of the day, do another lymphatic drainage or like moisturizer oils even under the shower. And then I always put my hair up in a bonnet, like a silk bonnet, and I sleep with like a beautiful nightgown because it just makes me feel very, very feminine in the evening. I like to put on a face mask. I'm like an addict to face masks. It's almost like a little bit over the top. OK, I don't recommend it to you. I almost have a face mask every day. Like those peel of ones I almost do daily. Just I love the ritual. It's cold on the skin. It's so hydrating. I love it and I take gummies to sleep better as well. Melatonin gummies. Then I play sudoku to keep my brain fresh on my iPad. I listen to podcast about politics, cultures, different religions, aliens I don't know and then I doze off to sleep and sometimes we watch something on TV. OK, my narcissistic ex used to start talking negatively about my body. Even though I look great at that moment, moment I didn't do anything. What should a black cat do? Give it right back to him, you know? Oh my God, honey, you should be going to the gym. Talk about yourself, sweetie. Talk about yourself. Because those few beers you're having every night, honey, I can see it in your belly. Have you ever heard of a beer belly I can see peeking through? OK so before you come for me, talk about yourself. When you .1 finger at the other person, 4 still point back at you. So it's like you got to be quick with it. You got to be quick. Give it back to them. Don't be afraid, they kind of like it too. Men like a challenge. Not that you need to impress your narcissistic ex, but you got to give it back to him. And I personally love good banter. I love it. I love a challenge, too. You want to come for me? All right, let's play. Let's play because I'm going to win. You underestimated how quick I am with my words. You come for me, I'll come for you. It's an eye for an eye with me, OK? Sometimes even worse. Actually, it's more than an eye for an eye. OK, I believe I'm the Bambi archetype. What should I change to become the Blackhead and so that I won't be target for Batman? You got to have a backbone. You need to believe in yourself. You need to use your voice and your words as the strongest tool to defend, deflect, or attack. That's the only tool you have because as a woman, you're not brought like a man. You don't look intimidating physically when you don't look aggressive. So the only tool you really have for protection to defend, deflect, or attack is your voice. Your words are extremely, extremely, extremely powerful. OK, but what the blackhead does, she's not like, I mean look at my energy. I can't hide. I can't fake this shit. Like I've been sitting here for almost 2 hours. Did I ever come across to you as I know there are this in this and I'm so dominant. I'm going to have to teach everyone and the ego through the roof. And I'm such a man eater. I'm so independent. Like if a woman is overly hyper independent and I'm such a man eater. And we don't need no man. She's coming from a place of wound or pain. Because if you truly don't care about men and if you're truly such a man eater and if you're truly so healed and if you're truly so confident, you don't need to tell us the whole time. You don't need to prove it the whole time. And also the energy people say things with is usually how truthful it is what they're saying. So if she says I don't need dominance, I'm so high independent, blah blah, blah, blah. And it's with aggression and dominance. You need to think where is this aggressive energy coming from? It's usually a layer of pain or woundedness. Again as well, when a woman is healed, it should feel, I mean unbothered, but it should feel almost happy or carefree. So when I, for example, multiple times set my informations, I didn't have to convince you. I just said, well, I'm confident, you know what I mean? Like I'm confident and that's it. Like you're just happy about it. You carefree, but you don't need to prove it to anybody else. So when you set boundaries with men, you don't need to yell, you don't need to announce it, you don't have to be super dominant, you don't need to be like cutthroat or blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. The tonality always stays feminine. The words you choose are extremely aggressive. They're very harsh. They should be cutthroat and they should be intimidating, but the tonality is soft and regulated and unbothered. OK, So when you set boundaries, it should be one or two sentences. It should be short and sharp. And you can talk about your feelings, how things made you feel and the consequence of a man's actions and how you're going to move forward. And when a man comes for you and makes silly jokes, you got to make silly jokes back. You got to just give it back to him, you know, and the tonality always stays the same. Grounded, confident, unbothered. Literally how I speak, none of this like it's so even me. I don't want to be around that energy. I'm sorry. I can't even hear you because you're talking so fast and you're so aggressive. When there's miscommunication, when there's issues as confrontation. As a woman, it's important you know how to handle yourself. You have way more power when you talk like this and you're grounded and you make short, sharp, also eye contact and you can hold the uncomfortable energy and then you respond with clarity. And again, you can use aggressive words, no swearing, but harsh, bold, cutthroat words, threats. You can use all of this but the tonality is feminine and this is how you are perceived. Also as powerful. And as someone that actually means what they say. I don't believe you when you're threatening me with all of this stuff but your entire energy is extremely irrational. I just look at you're mature, you have no idea how to control your emotions and whatever you're currently throwing out, it just makes you look extremely weak. By me holding it all together and having the opponent yell at me and pointing the finger and threatening me and people observing. Everybody knows who's the more powerful 1. So know when to speak, know how to speak and know when to not speak. Someone said don't you do journaling and read books? I am so busy right now I'm reading books on the beach. I started a really cute one. It like plays in Norway, I think it's called. Oh my God, was it called? It's not in the room with me, but I need you to post it maybe on my Instagram. It's a really nice book. I love it. And it's about 3 girlfriends and their 30s going to Norway. But it's also a little bit creepy. Like I'm really, really excited to read this book. I'm going to soon finish off the stream, then go back and read the book. Embracing Aging, Detaching Self-Worth from Appearance But let's quickly finish off just the last few questions. My loves. Where's your dress from? This is from Perfect Stranger, the label I believe. I found a single Gray hair in my hair. I'm late my I'm in my late 20s but I've completely sparred. How can I deal with this? Okay, aging is normal part of the process. I'm 30 now and there's definitely more wrinkles. OK it's normal but I always remove my emotions from it. Nothing. How can I become better? I also believe in I'm going to look better with age and looking back at old photos of myself I'm always like I always look better year by year. If you make this a belief and mindset of yourself this is what naturally will happen. If you say every year I'm getting better, older, wiser, more mature, pretty. I'm going to level up every day by day then, and you look at things and opportunities and how to fix certain things. Look, I'm going to give you the harsh, honest truth. I can't help you with your emotions here because if you find the Gray hair and you spiral, that's one thing. But the other thing you could do is remove your emotions and say, well, I don't like Gray hair, so I'm just going to color it, period. That's it. Moving on. So you need to remove one thing from the other. Yourself worth being tied to your hair color, yourself worth being tied to the laxity of your skin, yourself worth being tied to your appearance. We got to, we got to stop doing that as women. While at the same time, once you remove the two from each other and they're not really in correlation, you're worthy of yourself whether you have Gray hair or wrinkles. But then you can now look at your appearance from a very superficial, analytical and strategic point of view rather than emotional and say, how can I look better? How can I improve my looks? How can I make this one Gray hair go away? How can I improve the thickness of my hair? How can I improve the health of my hair? How can I improve the color of my hair? No emotions attached. Because you know inherently you are worthy no matter what you look like, while at the same time understanding how society works and that we're being perceived and our worth by others is maybe perceived by how we look. Does that make sense? You got to remove the two from each other, but then you can still work on both independently. OK, last few questions, ladies, and we're going to end soon. What would you say on minimum standards for a girl when it comes to self-care, self-image, self esteem, self respect, boundaries? Wow, Girls should never break or go under those standards. Like minimum standards for self worth and actions. To be honest, this is a really big question, but the answer is to be honest, very, very, very, very short. If somebody doesn't treat you with respect, you got to get rid of them. If somebody doesn't treat you with the same values that you would treat yourself with, they're not worthy of your time. Because here's what's going to happen, ladies. If you treat yourself with respect, the same amount of respect you treat yourself with, you should somewhat treat others with. OK, so if I really think highly of myself and I'm respectful of myself, even on days when I don't, I feel good, look good. I was also respectful of myself when I didn't have money. I look at the world the same way because everything in in life is a mirror, right? So if I'm thinking highly of myself and I'm respectable of myself, even when I had $10 to my name versus now being, you know, a multiple business owner, I look into the world at people and I give them the same integrity or values back. So I think I'm going to respect this person in front of me even though they also have only $10 to the name because they're my staff or my cleaner or whatever. But I respect them deeply because I respect myself and I had $10 to my name. OK, so now that we learned this, the second step is understanding whatever you offer to someone in a relationship or connection or transaction of friendship, you can demand in return. So if I'm giving that person respect the same amount I'm giving myself and I'm bringing respect to a friendship or relationship, but they can't give that back to me on the same level. I don't want them in my life. OK? It's like I'm trying to make it so easy for you to understand because it's literally my brain. Like it's a psychological template. It's like a tutorial. You think about yourself and yourself, perception and identity a certain way. You treat yourself with standards or values that matter to you. You want to protect yourself. You want to respect yourself. You want to show up for yourself. You want to be disciplined. You want to be resilient. You want to be mentally strong. Whatever you bring all of these attributes and skill sets and characteristics into every single relationship because that's who you are. You bring all of that into relationship. Whatever you bring into relationship and what you offer to the other person, whatever resource, skill set, characteristic, value, integrity, standards, you can demand in return on the exact same level, if they cannot match it, they shouldn't be in your life. Because if you bring loyalty and the person can't give you loyalty back, there's a mismatch. If you bring a lot of positive energy and forgiveness and kindness and the other person doesn't, they shouldn't be in your life. So this is how you know what standards you should embody by looking internally. What are the standards you embody for yourself? You can't look and run after men that have 6 packs but you're not going to the gym yourself. It sounds really dumb but it's the truth. Like you can't demand things from others. You're not offering yourself in the relationship either if you don't offer a certain skill set or attribute or characteristic or value in a relationship or certain standard or non negotiable. If you don't offer that in a relationship, you can't demand it in return from the other person either. You want this dude to be loyal to you, but you promiscuous yourself. You want this super healthy dude, but you're not healthy yourself. You want the very committed man, but you're not committed yourself. You believe in certain things but and you can demand it from others. OK, does that make sense? So this is how you know what standards to establish. This is how you know what should be non negotiables, not by looking at other men and your potential dating partners and thinking I'm going to hold them to the standard. Look at yourself 1st and think but what are the standards I have for myself? I have very high standards for myself. I show up on time, I deliver amazing value, I know how good I am and what I do. I love myself, I'm confident I show up. I go to the gym on my weakest days. I still do the absolute above and beyond if I can offer all of this. Also in friendships I do so much for my friends if I or relationships in general. If I do that for the people, I can demand the same in return, you know, And this is how quickly I cut people off too, because I'm thinking, well, if I'm being very honest with you, for example, as a friend, but I find out you lie, you're not my friend. I don't like when people lie because I'm extremely honest. I own up to my shit very quickly. You know what I mean? I have no problem saying sorry. I have no problem apologizing if I would ever do something wrong. So if somebody has a problem apologizing, if somebody has a problem with speaking the truth, there's an energetic mismatch because you can demand brutal honesty from me all the time, which is a gift to have as a friend, by the way. It's somebody who's brutally honest with you. But if you as a friend, can't give me brutally honesty back, you're not my friend. So this is how you determine your standards. My Journey: Understanding Relationships, Polarity, and Gender OK. Hi, Anna. So good to see you live. Hello. Hello, So this is so fun. I'm loving it. OK Anna, what is your rising sign? My rising sign is an Aries, which kind of makes sense because Aries is a fire sign and I am normally a cancer. Do you know, I'm sometimes scared showing people my signs because then I'm like, what if someone like, I don't know, like isn't that weed with astrology? I feel like it's something really intimate to give people. But anyway, my rising sign is an Aries. It's too late now. I guess everybody knows my rising sign now. Should you text your ex if you want help with a job opportunity? He's a career coach and helps people find jobs more of their career. This is an interesting question because I can read the intention from it. You're not really asking him for the job thing. You really probably maybe want contact with him. So First off, before I answer your question, please please please ask yourself. Hello, Livin is here as well. Oh my God I love seeing all of my people. This is so much fun. OK, hold on now I lost track of the question. Should you? Oh, wow. Oh my God, this is so fun. OK, wait, sorry, I need to scroll up. Should you text your ex if you want help with a job opportunity? OK, ask yourself one question. Do you really want to be in contact with this person again? Do you want him and contact with your ex more than the job opportunity or do you genuinely, really desperately want to level up and need help with your job opportunity? Ask yourself that question. Reflect on that first. OK, If you, let's say we don't care about him and you're selfish and you're smart and you say I don't care about my ex, but you know, he's a career coach and I just want to help and I really am so excited to level up my career, who cares? Message your ex, OK, who cares If you think this is a great way to get in touch with your ex because you love your ex so much, then there's feelings there and you know, by chance also I'm looking for a job and by chance, by accident, Whoopsie. He's also like a career coach. How amazing. What an alignment. Don't do it. Not worth it. Don't do it. You become the goal in the tree way because you're running after him. All right, my loves, can you talk about colour psychology and attraction? To be honest, I'm not an expert. Somebody said to me they wanted to do like in colour analysis on me before. I don't really know how it works. I've never done it. I just know I feel extremely confident in red. This is my favorite colour. Even my hair brush is red. Everything is red. I love wearing red lips. Red makes me feel very confident. I think red makes you stand out too. It looks very powerful. Also as a woman, when you wear red, it's just sexy. It's a seductive color. I think white is a very angelic color and it looks extremely luxury and classy and also almost wealthy in a way too. I think how you're being perceived by that same man. I think it looks very innocent and very feminine too. Like light colors and pastas, even nail colors. Like it looks very feminine the lighter it is. Wow, there's so much going on. Wait, this is so exciting. OK, we have another Aries rising in the chat too. I'm a scorpion. My situation ship is an Aries. Oh my God. I mean, look, I don't really know too much about the star sign. How do you learn so much about relationships? I learned so much about relationships because I ran away from home when I was 14. I had a horrible relationship to my family, my parents specifically. In my family, we have a lot of issues, OK? Like, there's a lot of bad mental health on my father's side. There's been like, I mean, I need to keep things confidential here, right? But there's been a lot of bad history in my family. And it just prompted me as a little girl to, in a survival instinct in a way, to research and understand psychology. It made me also very passionate about it. And I went to therapy from a very young age. And I've also seen other people because of the circumstances I was in, I got pulled into very even further bad circumstances. And I've been exposed to like crime and drugs when I was a teenager. And I've seen what happens when people are not loved or supported by the family when they go down the path of homelessness and drug addiction and just like zombie looking type of people. It became just really fascinating to me because I thought how come there's so much good in the world and so much evil? And what makes what makes the world go round beside money? And it's psychology, it's status, it's power, it's all of these hidden rules that we don't really actively speak about because we usually speak about, you know, money and success and like hierarchies and all of that and careers. And that's all out there. There's a lot of information about that even in the school systems and everything. But the hidden world behind all of that is psychology, ecology, right? It's relationships, not even just romantic relationships with a man, but also between women and social, climbing, networking, all of it. I became obsessed with it. And then because I was so vulnerable when I was younger, I became very street smart because I basically was on the street for a little while too. And then I took on very bad jobs because I was desperate for money. So I took on every job. Like like I said, I was cleaning. I was cleaning toilets. I was a dishwasher before and then I worked for almost half a year on a commercial fishing boat with only men, which was absolutely wild. And probably that was the most life changing moment of my life. And that's where I took most of the lessons away from that I'm teaching you today. This is what catapulted all of my knowledge around psychology, humanity, men versus women, feminine versus masculine, polarity, relationship dynamics, all of it to the stratosphere. All of a sudden, literally, I came off the boat and I was like, wow, this completely changed my outlook on men. And, and last, you know, it's just different. Like men and women are different. People like to fight this. I had a debate with somebody about this the other day. I want to talk about this. One of my best friends. We align on a lot of things and I love her, but we don't align on everything. And she was like, I think men should be allowed to wear nail Polish. And I was like, fuck yeah, men can do whatever they want. I don't care. And she was like, I think all men should be allowed. And I was like, anybody can do what they want. I don't care. But I'm not a big fan of it. And she was like, oh, why? And I said because that's something for US women. The same woman that basically say men take away everything from us and men copy US women, men want to control US women, men want to take over women and fuck the patriarchy and all of that. Are the same woman that then say men should wear nail Polish, but men copy us and men take away every from everything from us. But then you want them to wear nail Polish. And also the other thing is I know that their intention when my friends say things like that and they say men should be allowed to do this. Yes, they can be allowed. But if we push for this narrative that men should be allowed to wear skirts and high heels and nail Polish and all of that at the same time as women, we need masculine men. We need leaders, we need providers. And the same woman that say men should wear nail Polish are the same woman who would never be attracted to a man wearing nail Polish. Do you know what I mean? The meth is not mething. Turning Situationships into Relationships & App Launch OK. How to level up from six month situationship to a committed relationship? Stop sleeping with him, stop sending him nudes, stop having promiscuous FaceTime calls and try to because I think this is the same person that was long distance. Try to limit your interactions a little bit and see what happens when you pull back a little. You can't go in more when you already are stuck in a situation ship. You're currently stuck in a Gray zone where this man has access to two things, your sexuality while also getting girlfriend benefits. Right? Because women give the full spectrum while men just sleep with you and then they go about the day with their boys. In situation ships, men give the first woman give the full spectrum. So women also then call and play the therapist or talk with him about his family, even though they're not yet in the relationship category because that's just who we are. Like we are kind, we're giving. There's a mothering instinct there. So now men always have the best of both worlds when you're in a situation ship with them because they get all of the sexual benefits from you while not having to commit to you, right? So when you pull away the sexual benefits but also your girlfriend benefits on situation ship wages and you remove all of that, you will see by his reaction what he truly wanted out of you. Is he contacting you now and genuinely worried about where you went and why you are distant, what you are up to and how he can get a hold of you and what's happening in your life? Or is he trying to chase you up and follow you up with superficial messages just to get access to your sexual energy again? You will immediately know the only way to turn a situation ship into a relationship is by pulling back. I've done a full podcast on podcast on this. You can head to my Spotify to tune in and listen to it as well. Rihanna and Kendall are Aries rising signs too. I like that. What's your favorite candy? I don't. I don't like candy. I love eating peanuts. I love eating chips. I actually secretly love drinking beer, but that's because I'm from Germany. I love wine, red wine. I love having like a cheese board with it. I like fruit as the only sweet thing. I'm really not a sweet tooth. I don't like sweet stuff. OK my loves, do we have any more questions because we already live since 2 hours. I'm so proud. I hope everyone has been loving the first stream. I'm so excited. I mean I could go on for hours as well but I'm looking at the beautiful turquoise water and I really want to go and jump in and I need to read the book and I post the book on my story so you know which book I was reading. And please e-mail me. Please message me, please send me all of the DM, send me everything wherever you can with feedback, topic requests and anything else that comes to mind because remember, we can do the YouTube reaction thing, which I really want to do more of, OK? So please, please, please give me all of the feedback in the world. Let me know your thoughts. And by the way, I think it's tagged also on my Twitch account. I just launched my brand new app. You can all claim your free trial. It is literally for free. You just need to sign in. You can create an account and you can sign it and trial it for free if you want to. You can also sign up to the app straight away and unlock all of the benefits. But if you're still on the fence, at least try it for free. You cannot lose anything but trying it for free. The app has like amazing features with free ebooks, free learning resources. If you like my stuff already, if you like my advice, if you like my education, head to my app. It is all linked on my socials as well. It's linked on my TikTok. It's linked below on my twitch account. It's linked on my Instagram as well. Sign up to your free trial claim it today. It is absolutely worth it. You can talk to my AI client, which is basically my second brain, so you can keep picking my brain as well. Obviously nothing compared to the real version if you know what I'm saying, but if you have any last questions, please let me know. OK, what's your e-mail? I'm literally putting it into the chat. Girls, this is so much fun because I can literally interact with you also on here. OK black cat cat me. Oops, this is not working. I feel like such a boomer being on an iPad. Black cat a cat. theme.com sent OK can I pin this pin [email protected] Amazing. I would like to actually give you the link of the app as well. Can I do that? I don't know if I can do that on here. Let's try it. Let's try, OK? So also, while I'm looking for ladies, please let me know your last few questions because I'm really, really excited to answer a few more. This is pretty good for first dream two hours. We've outdone ourselves. We've truly outdone ourselves. Do you reply personally on e-mail and Instagram? Instagram, yes, sometimes e-mail, sometimes it's also my own team. OK. It's just because I'm so busy, girls, it's actually crazy. Do you know there's like this feature on Apple where you can copy and paste in between MacBook and iPad? I've never seen that before. It's really crazy. And I also don't really know how it works because I'm trying to do it right now. It's clearly not working. So. Oh, OK, ladies, let me know your topic suggestions as well in the chat. I would love to see that too. Here we are. I've got it. OK, so this is the link to your free trial so you can claim it. Navigating Social Media Red Flags in Relationships I'm going to pin that as well. See, we're learning. We're learning so much. OK, so this is the link to the app. Claim your free trial over there and I'm just going to quickly leave up everything while I'm still here. Why not? What if the guy you're seeing newly has random woman on his Instagram following and they follow each other? Is this a red flag? OK, this is a question that comes up all the time. Just remember men are men and they like what they see and they're lustful by nature. They like to seek out beautiful woman. They love to look at beautiful woman. The question is, is this a person that you want to marry and is going to be the father of your children and somebody you can trust for carrying his children in your body for nine months time while he's out there doing promiscuous things? Statistically, statistically speaking, a lot of men cheat while their women are pregnant as well. So it's incredibly important that you look at comparability and that you can trust your partner at the same time, don't overthink things. I think a lot of men follow Pretty Woman online. It's just inevitable, OK, I mean, what are you going to do? Put his phone away, blindfold him, looking him in your room? Like you can't ever just hide him from beautiful woman. That's just, you know, it's impossible. You need to be OK with within yourself knowing what he's doing. And if it's like a deal breaker, I was looking for the right word. If it's if it's a deal breaker for you and if you just want to have fun, if you're young, do whatever floats your boat. To me personally, it's just a little bit of a turn off because I don't want to compete with other women for a man. He should be competing with other men for me. Do you know what I mean? I'm going to be busy floating or filling my life so much and looking after me and building my life and my success. I personally also am drawn to older men. I think you should all date older men and I think you should always look for remaining the price in the relationship, having something that's going for yourself, whether you're younger than the guy you're seeing rather than you're prettier than the guy you're seeing or a little bit smarter. Like you need to be two steps ahead of a man. Otherwise if you feel you're equal and on top of that he's somebody that always is promiscuous, you lose your power very quickly. As a woman, you need to be the black cat. Black cat in the golden retriever is the black cat is a little bit more independent on the outcome of the relationship. The black cat cares a little bit less. You know, that's the way it should be. Look at Tommen Zendaya, look into a leaper and Callum Turner. It works. That's the way it should be. Can you explain more what you meant about crazy woman on your recent IG reel? Let's bring it up, shall we? What did I say about crazy woman? I post so much per day, I've no idea what what I said crazy woman. I said something about crazy woman. Let's look it up, actually, maybe put more contacts into the chat box. I don't think I've said anything about crazy woman. Nope. Feminine energy means selfishness. A man can always change his mind about you. The real reason the man will come crawling back. You need to eliminate a man before he eliminates you. Trigger the chemicals to make him bond to you. We've been speaking about a lot girl, but we haven't speak been speaking about crazy woman. Do you know what we can also do? Next time send me the reels you want me to review live? Because I think sometimes my reels get misunderstood. So we could even do live reviews or could add more context to certain reels, you know? OK, someone asked. I heard that you can do a voice recording on your phone to the AI clone that I just shared for your free trial and you can share it. You can do that. You can also share text screenshots from your situation, ship or whatever. You can literally send my AI clone just like any AI photos and say analyze this, which is why it's like no other dating coach does this. Again, I'm really proud. So try it, try, try, try. The team has been amazing and they're all holding it together. Feminine Communication to Empower Men & Stream Conclusion OK, last question and I'm going to go jump into the water. How to cheer men up to get more ways to build money to have for stability in the family. I'm the only one who's getting clients to our company and we have two kids now and it's too much responsibility for me. Have you ever spoken with him about this and have you communicated in a feminine way that you, for example, put yourself more into the wife and the mother role? Because right now you're and you're masculine, right? Because you're the one working, you take on so much responsibility. You also need to ask yourself, because women are a little bit smarter when it comes to foreseeing the future. Women usually tend to rush to emergencies before men do it, and we sometimes don't communicate it. I don't think you men ask you to work more. I think you naturally did it because you see the future and you think if we need more money and you need to, you know, support the family and everything. If I was you, I would pour a glass of wine over dinner, sit with him, hold his hand and say, honey, I am so exhausted. I've been working so much and I feel always lead with I feel, I feel I am, I'm this, I'm that, like lead with your feelings. He can't argue with your feelings. So you say how you feel and you say I just feel a little bit isolated and overworked and I just love being a mother. I love being a wife. I love looking after the family. I would love to then paint a picture of what the contrast would look like you as a wife, if you would work less and say I would love to cook for you everyday, like, you know, put it out there, paint a picture. I would love for you to, you know, welcome you home in the evening and just like have a warm meal on the table. I would love to look after he and there paint a certain picture what your marriage would look like if you would work less. So you lead with your feelings in a feminine where you're not complaining, you're not nagging, you're not aggressive, but you just say, I feel really exhausted. I feel really drained. I feel like I can't show up for you as a wife as much because it's true. Like you and all the men holding the entire thing together. And after all of that has been explained, the feelings he can't argue with. But it will trigger his mescaline instinct to nurture and protect you and look for solutions versus you Also additionally learn painting a picture or scenario of what your relationship and merge could look like if you would work less. Which is positive reinforcement of you working less to then offering a solution. Positive reinforcement of him working more. So you then introduce a solution, right? Let him get there yourself though. Let him sometime like try talk a little less, pause and let him offer. Babe there's no like absolutely no problem I will work more. What can I do what can I do to help? You know he will ask if he really cares and if he's a good man he will ask how to help and then you positively reinforce it And if it doesn't work straight away, which it usually doesn't because men take their time and they need mental reminders. I would use a template I've just given you, maybe another 2-3 times, you know, but do it in a feminine, seductive way. That's how you get through to his little brain. You never get through if you approach him with masculine energy, because it's a mirror. There's no polarity. He just gets annoyed. He doesn't listen. So yeah, that's my answer to that, my loves. Thank you for watching today. I had so much fun. Oh my God. And yeah, I don't know what to say. First time kind of nervous so yeah, this is it. Please let me know feedback. The chat is probably going to be close when I leave now as well so I don't know how that works, but please, please, please send me your feedback on iMessage. No wait, iMessage means you have my number on DMS on e-mail. Try the app for free. It doesn't hurt. You can always remove the trial. OK? Like try the app for free. You don't even need to put your card details in. Just try the app for free. It is absolutely amazing. I'm so proud of it. It is an amazing product. It can literally analyze your text screenshots like it's wild and you can message it all around like whatever time it is, it doesn't matter what time zone, it speaks all languages and it's there for you every single day. And it's the cheat like the cheapest offer. I could make it that cheap like it's the best. So yeah, thank you so much for your time. I speak to you next week. I'm going to be live again on the 22nd of July. I don't know what time yet. We will, we will see, OK, But I will let you know on my Instagram and thank you for watching. Bye.