What Was That?

So I've been gone, but can I just start with a question? Yeah, sure. When do we think Jorm's going to not be sick anymore? Oh, dude, it's lasted. I mean, this is much better. I sound slightly better. Well, it's funny you bring that up, because I am sick now. And when we, the three of us, Seth, we had a Zoom with a reporter who was doing an article about the 10-year pop star thing two days ago. And right when I got on, I think Andy, but maybe it was you, Jorm, said, they heard my voice and went, oh, Keev, you sick? And I was, like, real confident, like, no. And then I was sick, like, 12 hours later. So you guys know me better than I know myself. Yeah. That's what this pod is for. It's for us getting really deep with each other. It's like wearing one of those, like, health rings that, like, tell you when you're, like, going into the zone. Like, if you do a podcast with bros that have known you since high school, they're like, hey, man. Hey, man. Maybe slow down. Yeah. You guys are like my life monitors. Yeah. You've missed a lot, Andy. You've missed a lot. Right. And I'm very excited to kind of update you on things at the top of the pod. First of all, I'm very happy to report Scott from Seattle sent me what is my second bottle of Martinelli's sparkling apple juice. So did you get it? This one had a note, and the note just said, yeah, I got it. Hey, Andy, I just noticed that you wrote me at 11 o'clock last night, awake, question mark. Yeah. What were you reaching out for? I was not. I was in New York. And so you thought me, a father of three, would what? Like, just bust out and hang out with L.A., Andy? What if you guys went and got a drink in New York? No, man. I just wanted a wrap. So, all right. So you wanted a wrap. But, like, if I had said, like, yeah, dude, what are we going to do? Like, what would you have said? Oh, I'd be like, oh, I'm sleepy. Oh, I've got to go to sleep. Sorry. Just wanted to see if you were. First off, Andy's on West Coast time. So maybe he could have done something. He's West Coast time. He's a little more awake. And he's, again, he's, like, not with his family. Right. So he's, like, I could, like, chat it up. I couldn't zonk out till, like, 3 a.m. It was tough. It's like when you were here, Seth, at 5 p.m. and wanted me to get a drink. And I was like, of course not. Yeah, that's true. I get it. I get it. Andy, I'm going to guess you know this story that Jorm brought up in the last podcast. What did Jorm, it's a little lonely, a little Jorm trivia for you. What did Jorm want to change his middle name to but then didn't because it was $400? Oh. In high school. High school. It wasn't Jermack. No. That's different. No, you should know this because for our wedding, we were considering actually changing our middle names to this name as well. Yeah. I know the story, and I'm ashamed to admit. You're going to be super mad when you hear it. I would have got this one right without the pod, I'm saying, just so you know, Jorm. Fuck yeah, Keeve. Yeah. McDuck. Oh, right, McDuck. God damn it. Two comments about Jorm trying to change his name to McDuck. A couple of people actually offered to send the $400 now. Like, they're saying if that's still, like, your barrier to entry, people want to take care of that for you. Gotcha. And someone just wrote a solitary comment in the YouTube comments section. They just wrote Jorma McDuck Dacone, and then the next person commented, my phone is offering to translate to English this comment. And then only on this podcast can you get that. We talked about, Andy, it was agreed, we had a voter pool as to whether or not this was an acceptable term. As far as British listeners, it's called quids. Yeah. And when you want to ask a quid a question, you say punt us in the cunt us. Oh, my goodness. By 84%. They're totally fine with it. Great. So hit us in the titties, and for all you quids, punt us in the cunt us? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. We had some other names. We talked about how Aussies would be quunts. This is just, they're fine with it. This is, again, this is anecdotal. This was not a poll. Wait. Because of Qantas? Well, no, I think just like, I don't know. But also, somebody did say, somebody based on that, Andy, did say we should be called Qantas. Other people said Quasies, but I think quunts is the most fun. Quants is good. Canadians would like to be called quades. Like, how's it going, eh? But like quades. Quades. What an extra. Quades. Oh, quades. Yeah. Or quinux. Quinux. Quades. All right. So, Andy, you're going to say, I don't know. You're going to nail this one. What do we call our New Zealand listeners? Queewees. Yeah, 100%. You got it. Yeah. Are you a crossword guy, Andy? Because the crossword people were sending messages to us this week. Well, you were in it, weren't you? Or was it the minute? I was in it. And also, digital shorts was an answer on Sunday. Why are they trying to winter soldier, bro? I know. They're just trying to winter soldier all the time. Do you think we're not onto them? And then they're like, what? What are you talking about? We don't winter soldier people that host a podcast. We just were. We just do. We just were. Which is exactly what someone that does winter soldier people who do a podcast would say. Exactly. Akiva, exactly. Hey, I think I was there this day, and I do remember multiple takes of this moment in Hot Rod where Danny McBride shoves Yorm into the van. Yeah. And they said, like, it really looked like he really shoved you. Yeah, he did. Well, when we were shooting that, I was like, harder. Harder, man. Yeah. That was what I was going to say. I remember it, too. I vividly remember Yorm going. Hey, don't hold back. Shoved me, like, really hard, so I fly. But then you were injured, I remember, as well. Like, you complained about it after. I was trying to snap my neck back. It's always funnier when it looks like it hurts, and then it did. That was the lesson we learned on Hot Rod. It's like, it's funnier if it looks like it hurts, and the easiest way to do that is to actually have it hurt. 100%. Yeah. Did you see that Will Forte was on The Boys, the Amazon Prime show, The Boys? No. Didn't. Was he good? So he was playing himself. He was playing himself, and I'm a little bit behind in season five, but it does seem like what has happened, it was Seth Rogen, poker game, Kumail's there, Forte's there, Christopher Mintz-Plasse is there, and there's a couple of the evil heroes, Homelander, Soldier Boy, sort of interrupt the game. And Forte basically is talking about a lot of people in Hollywood have been sort of executed for their, you know, opinions about these sort of fascist superheroes. Forte says he's so psyched. He's been so psyched ever since Hayter. He's been psyched ever since Hayter died, because he's getting a lot of offers now on parts. But then there's a moment, and this is what people wanted you to know, Jorm, which is there's a moment where Forte says, can we just get out of here? To these two, because now like gnarly stuff is happening, and Soldier Boy turns and goes, cool it, MacGruber. And so they were like, oh, so in this world, these bad guys are like, when they see Forte, they call him MacGruber. Yeah, that's his go-to. Oh, great. We're part of the lexicon. Which makes me believe that like the actor Jensen Ackles is probably like a MacGruber fan and was like, hey, can I do this? So SNL just fully exists in this universe. Yeah. Like our version of SNL. Yeah. Can I say what I was going to guess it was going to be? Yeah. That it was going to be Forte and Homelander like drinking some milk. That's a big thing with Homelander. It just seemed very Forte-ish to me. Forte and him just enjoying milk together. Shugging milk. I also like milk. Like from a bosom. Oh, yeah, they do a lot of bosoms. Hey, congratulations, Andy, on wrapping your film. Thank you. Oh, yeah. Big time, dude. Thank you so very, very much. And for anybody who's like, oh, my God, he wrapped his film. That means a lot more Andy on the pod. Immediately into another film. That's right. Yeah, it's bad. Yeah. It's bad. It's a blessing. We're working very hard. We're very happy for you. For people who like to see you in movies, it's good. What a privilege. What a privilege. Yeah, what a privilege. I would never complain about it, Keev. Thanks for getting out in front of it. Do you feel refreshed now, though, Andy? Now that you have like three days before you start shooting again? Yeah. Man, I'm totally refreshed. Good. And I don't look worse. No, you don't. You don't. Two quick final things, and then we'll roll into an episode, which I maybe remember less about than any episode that we've talked about since we started this pod. Somebody said if we do do a rewatch, we floated the idea of like, should we do a podcast where we just rewatch the ALF pilot? We should give the Quades a heads up so that they can watch the ALF pilot in prep for us doing an episode about the ALF pilot. I think that's a good idea. I wanted us to do the whole series. I think a single episode about the ALF pilot is a good idea, yeah. I think so, too. I just have heard about people being like, they should do a full ALF rewatch pod. Oh, no, no, no. You don't want. I'm telling you guys, it's good. I think we'd start with the pilot. If it goes great, then Jorm can tell us another specific episode at some point to watch, and we can tell everybody to watch this episode. Okay. All right. Sounds good. Well, also, like, it's. I think, you know, obviously, this is something that I think Andy's angling at, which is like how Dax does Armchair Expert, and then like. Four other podcasts. Like, Andy would love to have, like, the ALF one be its own thing. Oh, yeah. More. More podcasts. I just keep showing up to these, hoping that eventually one of them's going to end, and I'll be allowed to leave Purgatory and go to heaven. It's not how it works. So, do you think, in this thinking, was the first podcast, like, the day you died? Definitely, yeah. So, this is all just a limbo. That's correct, yeah. Can we call it the ALF Limbo Podcast? Well, it's not. It's not ALF. It's just any episode. He's like, of course, we're watching ALF, so that hopefully we can go to heaven at the end. It's the middle space, Akiva. And you know what? I couldn't ask for a better group. I feel like ALF would be like Finding the Hatch in Lost. You know what I mean? Yeah. Like, it's like a little reprieve. A little spoiler. Oh, and the last thing, a comment I enjoyed was, not enough. This was a comment about the last episode. Not enough theater rake talk. Andy, you probably didn't listen to the Over Your Dead Body pod, but Joram and Keeve did like 10 full minutes on theater. Theater rake seating. It was like five minutes. I've been told by multiple people they like that this pod is about, you know, the craft. The craft, exactly. That includes pre-production, writing. Yeah, those are all good things. Post-shooting. Yeah, but which fucking nerd said that to you, Keeve? One of the Daniels. What is a theater rake? Like, well, you guys, here's a good, he left the door wide open for you guys to do your tight ten. Oh, great. Andy, I'm so glad you brought this up. Oh, no. It's the slope of the theater, and that can really affect an audience's enjoyment of hearing other people laughing in the theater. If it's too high of a rake, you get a little bit less of that. Keeve still likes the old school, you got to move your head a little bit. Like, somebody's sitting in front of you, blocking a little bit of the screen, that's a fair enough price to pay for the collective enjoyment. Understood. If it's going to be a big, full theater, yeah. Now, so on that note, Seth, when you're choosing where to film a stand-up special, do you keep theater rake in mind? I've never knew it was a thing, and I didn't put any thought into it at all. Okay, so no. That's a no. I think with stand-up also, it's very quiet, because it's just your voice. And so you're probably not competing with the soundtrack. You're probably not competing with the soundtrack of a film where it's blaring at you. Oh, I think you meant that Seth was so bad at stand-up that it was very quiet. No, I just meant there's a lot of negative space for the laughs to be heard. I think you would hear all the laughs will be heard. When all your jokes eat shit, you don't have to worry about theater rake. Keeve's like, you can try to find a theater where people are facing the back of the house. I've seen your show, Seth, and the rake ain't the problem. With Seth's show, you hear a lot of wind. Sometimes a tumbleweed can get pretty loud. Oh. The howl of a coyote. There ain't no rake that's going to crack that problem. Hey, by the way, the podcast hasn't started, just for anyone who's listening right now. They know. Because it starts when you hear a theme song, and Greg Chun has sent in a new one that he wanted. He requested that we listen to live. Oh, great. Okay. And so we'll do that. He's been killing it lately. I've been texting him, because I haven't been hearing him before I hear the show, and there's been so many good new ones. So let's take a listen, and then we'll start the podcast. Just three guys from the streets of California. One piece coffee area. Then came Seth, and the whole was greater than the sum of the parts. So now they talk about whatever they want. Like f***ing art box and smoking crack in a f***ing house. And gulping big f***ing d***s as payment for work. We're watching a cartoon. Just three guys. And Seth Meyers, too. Wow. I think we should just end the pod after that. Really good. Really hard to follow. For those who haven't visited ALF recently, that was to the tune of the ALF theme song. Just great. Just great. Thanks, Greg. Wow. What a lovely human being. Yeah. You killed it. Thank you, Greg. That made me feel actually better about what we've been doing with the pod. Oh, interesting. We talked about Fatal Farm at some point on this pod, but do you guys remember the Fatal Farm version from like 15 years ago of the ALF? It was the ALF opening credits intercutting shots into it. Because in the credits, they're like watching a TV, right? Yeah. But on the TV was all like hidden camera footage of the bathroom. So it was like everybody's cheerfully watching this TV, but they're watching horrible security cams of people on the toilets. It's curvy. Yeah, it's so uncool. I'm sure it's still online, guys. You just look at it. I remember finding it quite funny. It's inappropriate, but what I liked about it was sort of the commentary on the commerce element of sitcoms. Yeah, I didn't like how inappropriate it was, though. Yeah, but we don't stand by hidden camera footage of people going to the bathroom. That's not okay. I would never do a search for that on a porn site. No, not like multiple times. Multiple times, no. That's not how we found the video. No. We were like, we were typing in funny ALF videos. Hey, do you guys remember this short? Yeah, unfortunately. Oh, interesting. Andy watched it. I rewatched it. He texted me last night. I did rewatch it. Had you remembered it before you watched it? I did, but I hadn't watched it since it aired. And I remembered it going bad and being like, huh, I was wrong. But then watching it again now, I was like, man, was I just in a whole other mind space. How so? Because you disliked it. Just I thought. I thought it was like. Good? Yeah. Wait, you thought it was good on the rewatch? No. Okay. When we wrote it. Oh, I see. When we wrote it. Now, you guys have to take credit. Well, no, I don't because I had quit this season. That's what we figured out. No, you're misremembering right away. It was written during one of our album sessions. Seth, you know how you keep being like, you're sitting on all this gold, all these songs. Why don't you do one on the show? You've done Shirani, a new one. Why didn't you ever do any of these? Well, here's your, here's the big first one. Yeah. So this is an album track. We wrote it. Okay. We all together, all three loved it. Just kidding. Wait, what is this short? I just don't know what this fucking short is. It was, what was that? Right, because this is your, to remind you, you're not at the show. No, yes. I was not at fault for the video. Yeah, so we recorded it. To be fair to the statement I just made, we knew on some level it was, it was not. I just had sex or Jack Sparrow or something. No, no, no. And that is why we felt comfortable doing it because we thought it was a little, or at least I thought it was a throwaway one. So I was like, oh yeah, that'll fill the time. I thought it was a throwaway one. But I thought it was going to go on the album. But I thought, yeah. Yeah. Yes. I also really thought it would be on the album. And then once it aired, we were like, oof, that is not going on the album. I'm so glad we did that because now our album is going to be better. It's really true. It was a real lesson. Yeah. I think, I mean, we'll watch it. The disconnect for me was thinking that anyone would be able to laugh about the things that are mentioned in the song. The joke being like, to anyone, like a child, the horrific things that people have done throughout human history, you're just like, what the, what the fuck? Yeah. They feel so, they also just feel so abstract, but also so unfathomable that, I mean, a lot of them are unfathomable to any age, but as you get older, maybe you see more, I guess, evil in the world. As a kid, you're just like, how could someone do any of that? Yeah. My kids are that age where you tell them about, they're like, why would they do that? Like, very much. That's the whole premise of the sketch. Have I ever told you, has anybody ever read, I don't know if this happened to you, the Fireboat is this book that like one of the kids checked out from the library and like the cover of it is like a fireboat, like with hoses and you're like, oh, this looks fun. And I'm reading the book to my kids and it's about this old fireboat that they stopped using. It got decommissioned. And then these guys bought it. They bought it and they refurbished it. And then literally halfway through the book, it's 9-11. Oh, geez. And like children's drawing, like, you know, children's books illustration. And it's about how this decommissioned fireboat like got called into service. And it's like this, but like, I'm sobbing. Yeah. And my kids are like, wait, what happened? They're like, yeah. What is, what are you talking about? Who did what? And I'm like, just let me get to the end of the book about the fireboat. Yeah. I mean, yeah. Watching it now as an adult with children. I mean, we weren't like young when we wrote it, but compared to now, I, for me, I was like, it's kind of chilling me and we wrote it. I think just the, I think ultimately the joke of like saying the most horrific things that have ever happened and then being like, hit the showers. Like the dissonance of that does make me laugh, but I think. Yeah. The joke is about this character. It's not about the stuff, but. Of course. But. So how quickly into watching it on the night? Were you like, oh, like, of course. Pretty quick. And did you know it dressed? Did you have a moment of like, oh, this shouldn't air? I don't think it was that strong. That's a good question. Yeah. There's also an interesting choice made in it where like, I wish we had kept it all as TV feed cameras, but we switched to like glossier steadicam and watching it now. I was like, oh, it would have felt more protected if we hadn't been like, now check out the slick version. So it felt more like an actual thing that was happening with these kids and then this one really old guy pretending to be a kid. Why'd you make that bad decision, Keith? I haven't seen this since the day it aired, so I'm, I don't even remember. I, I forgot that it was at a UN kind of thing till you just said that. Let me say this though, Keith. That is not why it didn't work. Well, Andy and me and Andy were texting last night. Andy was more bullish about this than me. And I was going to, I'm going to put you in the category yorm because only because I'm not going to put you in the category yorm. Because you probably, even though you weren't there when we shot it, you were there when we recorded it. Yeah, sure. But I, I, I didn't dislike it, but it was definitely a shrug for me a little bit where I was like, I get it and it's fine and let's do it. But I don't want to put words in your mouth, Andy, but you were just more into it for whatever reason. Yeah. I think that that happens occasionally with me and Andy in particular on recording where I really sort of like us fucking around. And occasionally it's maybe a little thinner. I don't know, Andy, did you agree with that? Sometimes yes. And sometimes no. And sometimes no, you know, like you got to see them through to find out. Like there are certain ones that we were like, I don't know if that's even anything. But then because you started and you do it, you realize it's one of your favorites by the end. And then sometimes it isn't. I have lots of examples that we've talked about where one of you, where either both or one of you are starting something that I'm like, maybe like, I'll use an example of Ibiza from Popstar. Andy kept being like, let's do that song about Ibiza. And I'd be like, I, that's such an old observation. I don't know what there is to it. And the moment I was like, fine, I'll record you. And I just got on the computer like, here we go. And I was like, I don't want to stay in your way. So I'm like recording it. And then as soon as with the music and with his voice. I don't know. By the time you get to our tummies are full of pajaja, I think that like you're winning pretty hard. Here's the recipe for the pajaja. Steamy broth. That's what I mean. Like, because there's no pitch there. Like, oh, it's just a song about Ibiza. And I use the list. You're like, that's not a thing. But then you realize so much pop is based on less that it actually is. It's wonderful. Anyways. Do you like, before we do the rewatch, do you like it musically, Andy? Like comedy aside. No, because it's also my voice is really grating. It just has a lot of things going against it. I really like that beat. And I really like the synth line that comes in at the end when Arcade Fire starts singing. Do we remember who made it? Does it sound like a. I think it's a Drew Campbell, maybe, but I could be wrong. Sounds like it's what it is. But I don't know. We'd have to look it up. But yeah, I don't like the lyrics we wrote for Arcade Fire. They seem a little too pleased with themselves. Not them, the lyrics. I mean, see what you guys think. But for me, I was just rewatched it and was like, oh, man, I just would have done so many things differently or not done it. All right. Well, Keev, you want to lead the way? Loading it up. All right. Okay. Maybe fucking today. So fast. Thank you, Andy. That was great. Next on the day's agenda, a very, very special treat. The winners of our Model UN competition are going to address the General Assembly and present their thoughts on world history. So please, welcome. I like that side angle. Hello. Based on our hours log deliberating at the Model UN, here are our key thoughts on world history thus far. Two. Two. Three. Four. The Holocaust. Oh, yeah. What was that? Hiroshima. So it goes into the study right away. Well, yeah. That was just an intro, but it would have been fun if it was if we had just committed and shot it this way. Yeah. Come on, guys. It just seemed like a TV broadcast. What was that? Nanking massacre? That fully sucks. And Rwanda? Real mature, guys. Tiananmen Square? Give me a break. The Inquisition? What was that? The Khmer Rouge? I like these kids. Kids rule. Armenian genocide? Unacceptable. Ethnic cleansing? Talk to the hand. Talk to the hand. Apartheid? What was that? Get it together, guys. You're blowing it. The Middle East? Quick, goof it around. And all these oil spills? Hit the showers. The Dark War? What are you guys doing? But dancing? That'll set your whole mind and body free. So, you gotta shake it off and dance. Arcade fire! And dance your troubles away. Are you hearing this? And we will fight off the hatred and evil. You don't! 'Cause if you million-battles. You don't!. Yeah, I do think that that other camera, like, keeping it more TV. Keith, first off, most importantly, thank you for stopping it before the music started. Well, I was impressed that they left in the clapping and stuff. They left it a little air for you guys. It's because there was visual. They don't cut off visuals, but we had let it linger at the end. Yeah, that steady, though. Not as bad as I thought it was going to be based on Andy's preamble at all. Oh, okay. I'll take that. You were singing Irritating. You're opening Salvo as a dude, a kid in Model UN. You were great, Andy. I was with it. I was like, hey, maybe it's going to be good. Yeah. Hit the showers. Hit the showers. This is a question. Do you ever, when you see that many extras in a thing that you don't feel like playing, do you ever feel like, oh, God, we brought so many people in? No. Yeah. No, I feel it about bringing in all of Arcade Fire. Yeah. Yeah, that's fair. Yeah. Although they were a good vibe. They were, you know, running around, getting on top of desks. How do you, I don't want to put you, but did you guys ever have those moments where you're like, oh, my God, Arcade Fire. They're so great. I can't believe they said yes. Like, while it's playing and you're like, oh, this isn't quite landing. Do you have any, like, how do you feel? I mean, you mentioned it, Andy, but are you really like, oh, it's going to be awkward to see them? It definitely, like, once you see it air in front of an audience, you mean. Yeah. Because on set, we were like, maybe this is going to be great. Of course. Yeah. And I'm sure they felt the same way. They're like, great. And also, like, because they're putting their trust in you, of course. Exactly. And they, you know, they had been in the, the office meeting one for a shot. Yeah. Yeah. So we. And then we, and we, and we did like a Yhorm dances with them. We were pals with them in a way that I don't think it felt as shitty to like, you know, if you didn't know them as well. Also the whole, you know, it's every show is so hit and miss of an SNL, obviously, that this doesn't like stand out once it's in the 90 minutes to me. It just cruises right by. So I, it's just us holding ourselves to a different standard. I think maybe for me in rewatching a cube is just like the, the beat drops and I just scream the Holocaust and no one laughs. Right. I'm just like, Oh, this is bad. Yeah. But I mean, the jokes it's getting, you know, not the hugest last, but it's getting laughs on what it's supposed to, which is, you know, you're immature, like talk to the hand about the worst things, the general dynamic of the joke of saying the worst thing. And then saying something very, that you should just be saying about something very flippant is playing on some level. Yeah. On some level you can hear like 10% of the audience in enjoying it. Yes. I think the other thing is like once you, you either like the premise or you don't like the premise, but there's not a lot more, it doesn't like spike through the ceiling as far as heightening goes. So agreed. Also, I personally dislike that I, or we made the choice to scream arcade fire because everyone knew it was them. It just felt very SNL and overly presentational. I'm just down on that out of fear that they weren't famous enough, but they were the musical guests. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Second time, uh, keep, keep, do you remember where you guys actually shot that? Cause like that room is pretty big. It's a good looking little room there. I mean, it was, it was definitely, I think we were at SNL. I don't know. You've killed when you're talking about how good the room looked. Well, by the way, we, but we did pull off the overall thing. That's the actual UN symbol. That's why that's the actual symbol. And you know what? It is good. I'm trying to find a wide of the back of the room is what you're talking about. Cause mostly it's these, uh, real cutaways of people at the UN. Yeah. But yeah, like what's that door there? Does that remind you of something of a state? One of the stages, Seth, you're there every day. What's this door? Um, that is not my, that's somewhere on six. I would say, I bet that's across the, this is just a testament to how much we shot in that building that I'm like, oh, I don't know that room. The three kid extras are great. The ones playing music are great. Oh, there we go. This is the whole room. So I don't know where that is. Sorry, dogs. Don't know that plays the part that fucking building. I mean, you know, it's maybe just, um, super poignant. It's just not meant for laughter. You know, it's like children telling adults, stop fucking it up. Oh, poignancy. It's a lot like the fifth element, you know, just when she's like ingesting all of humanity's trauma, you know what I mean? But it's, it's a lot like that. And she's like, why y'all suck. Yeah, that's right. I think that she says that right after she cries, she's like, hey, why y'all suck? Bruce Willis defenders in the quades, the way that like daiquiri girl gets weirdly defended by being so, um, so bad, but not, I guess. I, you know what? I'm very, I'm really leaning into putting poles in. So, uh, we're going to put in daiquiri girl versus daiquiri girl with a bullet is not attempting much and therefore is pulling it off. I think you moved your mic too far away for you, Andy. Um, the, but we heard you, uh, the, is this better? Yeah. Oh, that's, I was just trying to open a bottle of water. So my hands would be free for one fucking second, but that's not, that's not going to be good enough. Andy, would you want, well, don't talk when you do it then, Andy, the, uh, would you want this one to have not existed? Oh yeah. Now you don't ask him questions right after he pushes his mic 10 feet away. Cause he has to open a second. Yeah. One second. I have to take a sip of my water now because I had to take a break to open it. I got to agree with any of though, if I think if you guys had shot it without the steady and kept it all within the context of UN footage, I would have been way more into it. Yeah. But it's no, but it wouldn't have been any funnier. What I would like about that is it would be protecting it. As Andy said, it would just feel like we hadn't tried as hard. Yes, exactly. One, but two, if it had been actual kids doing the song instead of me and not doing it in that annoying voice, I think maybe it could have been just a cool, interesting little piece, which is just kids yelling at adults. What was that? Talk to the hand. They might be fucked up the whole world. What the fuck is wrong with you? Yeah. It might not have been huge laughs, but at least would have been like a complete thought. Point across in a clear way that didn't try to be thirsty as well. But you, you just, by the way, the point, the point. across is don't be like mass murderers and pieces of shit warmongers yeah that it's obvious to children yeah and also most adults couldn't get rid of your ego to like not be on camera right no i had to be in the show me and yorn kept saying let it be a kid and then he was like you were kevin and hot rod do you think you were the right age for that and then we were like fine i wasn't there i wasn't it was exactly like that andy did you see the picture of me sitting like lauren underneath the poster of lauren oh you did i did because that was on our text chain that was so funny yeah and it made me very happy it was so fun thank you lauren loved it too uh keep to answer your question do i wish it didn't exist at all yeah that we hadn't done it that's tough oh man i don't like yeah you don't want to change the past right yeah i don't like to ever regret something that much that you'd be like erase it from ever happening because we learned from it you know oh so you're glad that dar for happened then that was the quote that was the quote but yeah i mean i might i might delete it from all of human history it's fine i think it's it's professional it's just not what we like yeah you know uh speaking of uh the ones that you know sometimes you don't know if they're going to be what you think they are or maybe being overly bullish me and you were so into legalize it from pop star i don't include you yorm in that but you can include yourself or not i mean i like it but yeah but we i remember just really really liking it because of how it sounded and because it was different and because i thought and then for years i've been like ah we should have put fuck off in the end credits because i like it more now than yeah i agree with that yeah but it was interesting at the pop star screening so we're it's the end credits and it's playing and it's a short amount of it that really lines up nicely with the credits it feels good and it ended and we were talking about stuff and and i brought it up to the audience because someone brought fuck off and i was like yeah i wish it was that when it said and then everyone there kind of slightly disagreed and was like that's a good feeling they like fuck off but they were like no i'm not going to do that oh no it's really good there it fits with the credits it ends nice yeah but kiev where the people that all said that like oh we love that one and then they were like lazing in the audience yeah yeah it was at the kingston screening gotcha in jamaica and they were all smoking no no no they were like weed heads you know i mean like they obviously you can bleep that as is our custom yeah of course but uh in a house bleep it by the way by the way by the way yeah no one has approached me anywhere and asked for a gulp oh a lot of people in the comments are trying to line up their gulps they're like they want time and place because they've been watching digman and loving digman and they're like where do i go for the gulps well look i got a mouth sitting right here you know and you're in new york now they're one of the great walking towns in the world yeah people love it by the way the first time this actually happens i'm going to be real uncomfortable hey i probably shouldn't have to say this guys but if i'm with my kids don't ask for the gulp okay just take him to the side he's off to the bathroom um obviously like traveling pairs and make sure one of you has like toys for andy's kids to they can play with while you take them traveling pairs yeah yeah there's logistics if you're looking for your digman qualp uh just have a bag of toys stuff that the kids what are they into andy what are the things your kids are into right now so they should have so much stuff you know just like straight edge hardcore and um wait can i share the screen for a sec keeve uh yeah i'm not sharing anymore oh right how do i do it again fucking i know oh yeah here we go i know you share the screen is that what you want all right hold on share boom uh optimize share sound oh no okay oh jesus it's a roller coaster oh no okay uh this one you guys see it yeah this is like but has become like a meme this sketch do you know which one this is it's when he spits in her face right yeah look at you more like scarlet joe handsome good nickname so real quick andy you've done this the most this is junket press yeah so this is where you uh you a movie actor sit in a chair and just like different interviewers come through yeah uh yeah bill and wig just already making me laugh so much by the way this episode is scarlet johansson arcade fire and it's from november of 2010 and wig and hater just walked in as cheesy interviewers basically almost like morning show they're they're gonna do some junket press with scott i'm brady trump and i'm anastasia sticks thanks so much anastasia sticks is a great name and bill almost laughs right off the bat at anastasia sticks yeah anyway are we speeding is the lens cap off all right okay my peas are my shoes shiny okay scarlett johansson right off the bat i gotta say congratulations on your tony award how did that feel oh god i was so surprised i was not expecting that at all um being on stage in new york it's it's such an incredible feeling they're weirdly nodding encouraging her to keep talking big open smiles you know i i do realize that i have i'm playing a sight gag sketch which is not great for the pod but i do i do encourage everybody to go see a hollywood dish wait i want to get to the you know what i just i think i should just go wait wait wait wait please please one last question one last question and not personal at all yes we're asking everybody just tell us how excited you are for the next and probably final season of the jersey shore you know i've i've never seen the show so i i just don't watch a lot of reality television wigs holding it together wow so we did a spit take but into kristen wigs face oh that's great then he took like a slurpee and threw it in her face and then a whole bowl of popcorn or chips and dumped it the bowl on her head he's still acting super surprised it's a wonderful i mean so is that that's that's a little gif that gets used over and over yeah of turns up all the time but then grabbing her drink throwing in her face and then pulling like a bowl of spaghetti from off camera is that what it is wig really holds it together well she did and then bill trying to hold the face of like shock that she's never watched reality shows or whatever that's really funny um andy do you remember we're gonna watch you from dress oh no this is vocabulary words cut oh vocabulary man do you remember it no who who wrote it you and jost the classic me and jost probably some high school or college topic thing because we were young guys uh probably you want to give it a go i mean look at how young this gentleman i know that's crazy well seth meyer's actually years america has spent more and more on education with no noticeable increase in test scores here to comment on the state of our education system is the kid who just learned a bunch of vocabulary words i mean it's a real it's a real justin andy right off the bat aloha seth oh so i hate this guy i mean i hate this guy so much more than the guy from the model u.n well this guy is well that one aired and this one got cut yeah let's see we're about to find out why aloha seth you look exquisite thank you so how are you i'm doing swimmingly seth and also effervescent thank you okay very good so uh so tell me where do you think america's education system has gone wrong well seth i think you'll surmise that not all of the populace has been magnanimous there's a lot of metaphysics that's almost quixotic in its magnanimous out of curiosity can you define the word magnanimous you are so sporadic seth god you are sporadic define sporadic oh i don't know what they're doing i don't know what they're doing i don't know what any of these words mean the essay teaser in a week i'm never gonna get into howard university do you think howard yeah i'm sorry for being so maudlin i apologize for this incessant nictating what's nictating it's a latinate verb synonymous with blinking hey i think you're gonna be fine i think you do know these words really would you say this went swimmingly sure okay okay i'm gonna go back to my room to masticate you're gonna go back to your room to chew oh no i used the wrong word you just learned a bunch of vocabulary again works both ways nice i like how short that one was yeah it's cute uh totally fair cut but let's uh not bury the lead here what you have tried to do there was repurpose griff banks is the griff banks yeah so banks has failed now twice as a sketch you're like what if we take the part that's also not worked that's right it was the crying that was the griff banks and the voice oh got it but the perspective is decidedly different yeah this one was an update feature well there you go it was a weird episode two of the I mean Scarlet one of the great hosts of our generation Arcade Fire one of the great bands of our generation and yet sometimes they just are you know they come and go there was some good stuff in there Surrounding Busts is that a sequel to Chandeliers I will say I was looking at the rundown and I noticed Jost had a real good show and I was like ooh you think like maybe like oh she's like a lot of rehearsing she was like you're a star well or he was like yeah he was doing his best to like catch her eye you know yeah and it worked they come and go like Tumbleweeds at a Seth Meyers stand up show good wow it took me a second it took me a second oh good he's got a big bowl of zucchini to eat the show's come and go I don't know somebody said come and go it worked did your child bring you your big bowl of zucchini yeah Seth great well hey papa I got your evening bowl of zucchini thanks kiddo papa we wanted to make sure mama wanted to make sure you got your food before the pod was over so the quades could hear you chew Andy drank some water if the quades don't hear papa chew then I sleep in the closet we bought you the crunchiest zucchinis we could find it's watercress guys it's different it's a weird house over there even crunchier well at least you're also sick unreal alright I actually have to go well first off let me just do my my spelling bee oh yeah Andy spelling bee Jack Black spelling bee spelling bee I got it with one hint what was your hint word it was fucking nuncio oh yeah I missed one but I haven't looked up what it is and you're gonna guys in real time you're gonna see how mean Andy is when I tell him a word I didn't get I only missed by one but I'm gonna tell him uncommon you fucking idiot wait you got nuncio Seth yeah but only after hints and what did it mean uh uh swimmingly exactly it seems like maybe vocabulary man uh fuck him I'm not gonna get into Howard I'm not gonna get into Howard bro you guys obviously the best joke in that was yeah I'm not gonna get into Howard yeah you guys I little update on me I only I'm only on good right now so I have not gotten to solid hey guys it's Andy I'm on an airplane I'm about to take off it's May 4th I hope this isn't the last thing that I ever say but I got queen bee squeaky clean I got it squeaky zero hints of any kind it was an easy one granted but I did it in under 15 minutes and got it completely squeaky and it felt like a goddamn dreamer hot knife through butter uh Seth didn't he already texted me so he definitely didn't get it I hope this isn't too hard to listen to okay later queens love you hey can I just say one last thing before you leave Seth yeah I got a bone to pick pick it I sent in a voice note for last week's mhm right at the end and I knew it would be right at the end cause I was told that I was talked about right at the end yeah and so I listened to it to see how it was cut in and I said later Arnold and they cut it out and they cut it out and they cut it out cut it out what well I I think cause people like they like hearing Jorma say take it away Arnold wait is that not what you're supposed to say you can still let Andy say later Arnold and then just come back for whatever you need I don't take it up with Jeff dude I'm not doing the post look I'm the favorite character on the pod by the way everybody does Jorma is everybody's favorite now we just all have to fucking deal with that reality well it's cause he's the only one who's on it look when you're hungry you gotta eat watercress yeah it turns out the guy who like takes out like multiple hours of his week all the time to thank everyone individually is the most liked oh somebody said they met Jorm and they said Jorm is the nicest person in show business it's fake I haven't met Forte yet no it's Forte we all know it's Forte and I will say Jorm is trying to sell you something you know what I mean yeah oh big time over here dead body out now there it is the thing about Forte is so nice to people I think we've talked about this if you meet somebody like in Kansas City and they're like I oh I know Will Forte you're like oh no I gotta like I gotta be so nice to you to just be half as nice as Forte was correct like he's so nice and so patient and so kind and like it's lovely but like if you're like cause you wanna be like dude before this even starts I just want you to know I'm so much nicer than most celebrities but I'm nowhere near as nice as Forte and that doesn't mean I'm a bad guy and also let's be real there are times when Forte's so nice that it's like arguably a liability oh not sometimes I'd say like 50-50 where he meets someone somewhere and they're like oh I'm so happy I just got out of prison for a triple homicide and he's like come to the after party he's like I did some weird stuff to a guy who looked like Lorne Michaels he's like oh you should meet the real one Andy how did you feel about New York Magazine saying that Seth and Yorma were the two sweetest sweetie pies of the Lonely Island Seth Meyers podcast uh I think that you know it's easy for people to just hear what they're given on the pod and not know the truth right the dark dark truth yeah but that's fine you know it's a good watercress yeah why are they putting on such a show you know what I mean who's it for for them is it for them in a way you know it's so that they don't feel like where is this need to be liked coming from you know what I mean dark dark place well do you think it's just like ASMR fans who are just like super into it into Yoram they just know that it's gonna be like great question like great voice and like a lot of crunchy food yeah there's certain people that just tune in for the chime ads I bet oh yeah I hope it's a chime week we don't know yet guys we record these and then we find out later which ads are in can I show you guys something before you leave Seth no I gotta go look at this somebody gave us this he did he did individual uh illustrations for every single short and he gave us these posters it's so fucking nice gotta post it gotta post it his name is Josh Abraham is his name and thank you Josh thanks Josh Abraham yeah take a will you take a nice photo of that hell yeah that's awesome it also makes us feel good about all the work we did alright I love you guys Seth's really trying to shut it down love you too Seth love you Seth love you guys take it away Arnold later Arnold later Quades fuck