Welcome to Vile and Horrendous | Vile and Horrendous: Episode 1 | Joe DeRosa

This episode is brought to you by TXU Energy. For the first time ever, Texans have an energy plan that combines free nights all year with daytime summer savings. It's called Free Nights and Cool Summer. You get free nights every night, all year long, plus a 25% bonus toward your daytime use all summer. It's a first-of-its-kind plan created for how Texans actually use energy. Discover how much more you could save with Free Nights and Cool Summer. TXU Energy. Energy for everything. Visit TXU.com for more information. Rep number 1-0-0-0-4. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the inaugural episode of Vile and Horrendous. My mic wire is already showing. I was trying to hide it from the audience. Here we are at the YMH studios. Before we begin, I just want to thank everybody for their extreme hard work in getting this show off the ground. People, it took a lot of work to make this look like dog shit right now. Wait, I thought it was going to be easy. I thought it was going to be easy. A lot of work. Anyway, I am your host, the Vile Horrendous, Joe DeRosa, here with this new show, Vile and Horrendous. Look, we're just going to start getting into it. You're going to get the gist of what this show is all about as we move along here, but it's going to be a lot of complaining, to put it shortly. I am going to have a cigarette. I've been dying for a cigarette all day, and now that I'm finally inside and around other people, I'm going to have one. Folks, we've got a few different segments to go through tonight. All of them deal with the disgusting society we live in, hence the title of the show. It's just how we're going to roll. Let's kick things off. This first segment, it's about the fucking morons that are out there, that we run into every single day. This is Roll It, More on Morons. People, okay, I live in an apartment building here in Austin, Texas, and I would just like to show you a picture that I took in the elevator of the building. Okay, do you see that picture? There's a reason it says piss twice with three, different arrows. That's piss on the floor of the elevator. Dog piss. That's dog piss on the floor of the elevator, which means residents in the building have their dog piss in the elevator. Now, maybe it's an accident. I get it. Piss happens. Sometimes dogs freak. They can't hold it. I get it, but here's the problem, people. I am telling you, and I swear on my life, they don't fucking clean it up. It sits there. It sits there in the elevator, and by the way, I have called the building office so many times about this, and every time, they are shocked when they get the call, which means the other residents aren't calling. They're just leaving the piss sit there. What the fuck is going on? This is disgusting. All right, pull the picture down. This is disgusting, okay? By the way, I want to be clear about this. That's the human elevator. It's not the dog's elevator. There's no special elevator for dogs. It's the human elevator that the dogs are pissing in, and other residents aren't calling. I'm the only person going, Jesus Christ, and by the way, if any of them heard me complaining about this, they'd call me a fucking Karen. I'm not a Karen. It's disgusting. It's disgusting. If you are watching this, and you live in my building and have let this happen, or you live in your own buildings elsewhere, and you've let this happen, fuck you. You are disgusting scum. To what length will people's, my mess is somebody else's problem go? By the way, here's the thing. I don't even know why I'm surprised. I don't even know why I get worked up about this shit anymore, because this is what people. I'll tell you. Here's what I'm trying to say. Did you ever go to a party? I'm sure you've been to parties, okay? I'm sure you people have been to parties. Did you ever go to a party at somebody's house? We probably have a bit of an older audience listening to this, and all the guests at the party are in their 30s and 40s. You've done it. We've all done it, right? Go to a party where all the guests are in their 30s and 40s, and use the bathroom while you're at the party. Guess what you'll find? Piss all over the seat. All over the seat. Human piss, not dog piss. That'd be a good party. But no, human piss will be all over the seat, because 30 and 40-year-old and older people don't wipe up their piss. I can't. fathom this behavior. I can't fathom it. I can't fathom. If I'm at a dinner party and I spill water on the table, I'm like, oh dear, oh dear, oh dear. Oh, I'm so sorry. How do I clean it up, mommy? Help me. I freak. Water, not piss. This is disgusting. This is how inconsiderate people are. Look, here's the thing. There used to be house rules in society, all right? Well, not even. Let's call them loose rules in society, okay? There was at least a vague defining line that set the parameter for society, and I think that line was bodily discharge, okay? Once you brought bodily fluids or waste into the public forum without some sort of discussion or discretion. Discussion. I said it wrong. Discretion. But discussion, too. I think if you bring piss out in front of people, maybe you breached that subject first. But my point is, is if you did it without any discretion, it was fucking frowned upon. It was frowned upon. Apparently not anymore. You're just letting your dogs piss in the elevator. What is the end game here, people? What is the end game? We're pissing on toilet seats at parties. We're letting our dogs pee in the elevator. Is it how do we get to act like homeless people except inside? Is that the goal? Is that the goal? How do I get to be homeless inside? Oh, look at the guy shitting on the sidewalk. I'm jealous. I want to shit in an area people have to walk through, but still be considered a functioning member of society. Well, if that's what you want, people, don't you fret. We're almost there. We're almost there. It starts with leaving dog piss on the floor of the elevator and not cleaning up your own dog piss, or not being a responsible enough tenant to call the building to say there's piss on the floor here. We'll be up to human piss in the elevator before you know it. And it's already happening in the stairwells of New York, by the way. Walk through a stairwell in New York. You will smell piss. You'll get there. And by the way, this is happening once every three weeks, at least, once every three weeks. So we're almost there. We're almost there. We got human piss on the toilet seats. We got dog piss on the elevator floor. It's only a matter of time before we reach shit. So all hail dog piss. It is the unyielding activist fighting for our basic human freedoms in a long line of people who fought for the rights of human beings in this country. Martin Luther King, John F. Kennedy, Malcolm X, and now dog piss has the stage. It's disgusting fucking morons. I don't know what else to say. Anyway, let's go to the next segment, people. This one is called You're Wrong. You see the theme building here? Does everybody at home catch on to the theme we're building to? Okay. So the gist of this segment is public opinion is insane to me. And people all move in wonder, direction, and I don't understand it a lot of the time. So we're going to address some of those public opinions that I don't agree with in this segment called You're Wrong. And this one is very special. I wanted to do a really special one for the first episode. Can we, I want to roll the clip of this. I was on your mom's house. I was sitting in for Tom with Christina, and we were talking about having a discussion that involved marijuana. And this was the clip that they put out from the episode. I got tired of having to tell bartenders that worked for me. You can't walk outside during your shift and smoke fucking pot in front of the bar. Do you understand? I'd yell at you if I saw you drinking right now. Right. Friends going, oh, we got to drive to the mall. Let me just take a quick hit. Fuck you, dude. You're driving me. It bothers me that people think it's so different from alcohol. If I was about to drive you somewhere and I go, hold on, let me take a quick shot. That's true. This is a big argument that me and my ex-girlfriend used to have. I'd be like, people that smoke weed in the morning imagine if i woke up and said i have to clean the house i just want to do a couple shots first and she'd be like it's completely different i go it's different to you because you have a weed tolerance guess what i have a booze tolerance i can drink a lot a lot okay i don't do it ever outside of times when it's time to drink it is true did we have to plug the podcast at the end do people not know about your mom's house podcast does anybody watch this what's this show i do i only drink when it's time it's time this isn't a this will be here every episode uh look people this is this is booze okay this is a substance this is a substance uh okay let me explain let me explain before i start here this is a substance it's called whiskey okay uh it inebriates you uh it has an effect on your mental state uh and your physical state um which i realize weed no it does fuck that shit it does we'll get into it here's the point this is not meant for driving time this is not meant for 10 o'clock in the morning uh this is not meant for work real work not this but like a real job okay and that was the point i was trying to make was that booze has an effect on people and people that drink a lot of booze it doesn't have an effect which is why there are things called functioning alcoholics where people drink throughout the work day and you can't tell that they're drinking and they still function properly some of them function better inebriated because their body has become dependent on the substance okay they can't work if they're shaking and having withdrawals but they can work if they're drunk because that's their normal all right that was my point people do the same thing with marijuana sorry i called it pot sorry i called it pot i fucking i'm not up on my slang i guess guys i called it pot i never that's one thing i haven't heard the fucking end of since that clip went fairly viral okay the clip went fairly viral i thought i was making a fairly sound argument apparently i wasn't okay because we got 3405 comments as of two weeks ago okay about six of the comments were intelligent who'd have thought who'd have thought that the weed smokers would make the dumbest fuck out of their lives arguments on planet earth who'd have thought the most common uh argument that was made to me the most common argument uh and comment i saw was shut the fuck up pussy fucking pussy oh you guys sound chill you guys sound so chill this episode is brought to you by txu energy for the first time ever texans have an energy plan that combines free nights all year with daytime summer savings it's called free nights and cool summer you get free nights every night all year long plus a 25 bonus toward your daytime use all summer it's a first of its kind plan created for how texans actually use energy discover how much more you could save with free nights and cool summer txu energy energy for everything visit txu.com for more information rep number one zero zero zero four tammy regularly hauls stuff to her kids at college that's why she shops at bj's wholesale club saving up to 25 off grocery store prices beef jerky microwave meals laundry pods even they can't screw up have you met my kids and with bj's gas she gets there for less they call me the road warrior this is your home road warrior mom home of the save join for just 20 at bjs.com mesquite and save 10 cents per gallon for six months open soon limited time offer new members only bj's home of the save i just want to go through some of my favorite comments uh these are all coming from people that say weed is medicinal uh and it's good for you let's just go through some of these comments by the way the grammar and spelling in these is just fucking mind-blowing uh but let's let's show this one okay people who smoke weed are more in control than people who drink alcohol dot dot not dot dot dot dot dot seriously two more dots for no reason exclamation point weed is not hallucinogenics uh dot two more dots exclamation point again calm down bro two more dots this guy loves two dots two dots and ellipses is three fucking dots i would i don't know if you're putting an extra period in by accident or you're shorting the ellipse i don't know uh i would not trust someone on antidepressants driving or working considering they are dead from within period for no reason before slamming weed smokers who are still functioning spiritually and still emotionally wired again dot dot exclamation point this comes from designer what is it designer design me over design me over was it a male or female i couldn't see does it does it looks like okay okay it doesn't matter dumb shit is a dumb shit uh i just i again i love the two periods with the exclamation point uh and my favorite part of that one is weed is not hallucinogenics uh okay it's it's first of all hallucinogen is the term you're looking for and weed is literally a hallucinogen that's what it is it's fucking defined as a hallucinogen know your medicine know your fucking medicine please please and learn the word to at least use incorrectly it's not a hallucinogen not weed is not hallucinogenics plural for no fucking apparent whatever man we're just getting started with these give me number two the pull up the yeah there we go okay here we go i love this one uh richard thy is a grit is how do you say this richard thighs a grit that's what it looks like yeah i don't know i don't know uh he appears to be a mustache man with a headset on uh i can absolutely do anything baked i can't not baked, anything. Okay? Because you don't do anything, Richard. You don't do anything. When your life is filled with nothing, you can do all of it baked or not baked. Anyway, I can do anything, absolutely anything. Baked, I can, not baked, anything, name it. Okay, I'll name it. Let's start with learning how to write a sentence. I'd say you might be better at that when you're not baked. I'd add to that being successful, being present, being interesting, challenging, constructive. Oh, the list goes on and on and on and on and on. Then he goes on. Let's read the rest of his thing. I also have a problem with alcohol, but I can tell you I can't do 90% of what I do at my job. I can't do 90% of what I do at my job. I can't do 90% of what I do at my job or errands, et cetera, drunk. The guy literally says, I'm a fall-down fucking drunk. It's weird. I'm a raging alky that I can't do half of the shit I can't do. Yeah, maybe you're a fucking drunk. Maybe you're not even a functioning alcoholic. Maybe you're just a drunk. I smoke pot and drink every day, every day. And I can tell you with absolute certainty, alcohol is leaps and bounds worse. It's not even comparable. If I could just, I can't even read now. Hey, Richard, I'm right there with you, buddy. If I could stick to just the pot, I can't read. You can't write. We're all fucked. If I could stick to just the pot and not getting into booze after work, I literally wouldn't have a, I think I cut it off because it was just going on and on. We can fill in that blank. Literally wouldn't have a life, job. I can't even read. I think I cut it off because it was just going on and on. I literally wouldn't have a, I think I cut it off because it was just going on and on. I can't even read. I can't even read. just stepped out of a steam room after you sat in it for four hours. Your brain is completely fucking burnt. You're deep fried. Your eyes are so dry. They feel like they're going to fucking disintegrate. It's guys, there's a reason the word burnout exists. It's because of the way you feel burnt after you smoke weed and you're in a fog when you smoke too much weed. And I know the weed enthusiasts are saying, I'm never in a fog. It's because you're smoking fucking weed all the time and you're not aware of the goddamn fog. All right. I know it's not a hangover in the sense of booze. I know you don't get a headache or throw up or whatever. Hey guys, you know, what's never happened to me on booze. I've never fucking shaken in a spiraling panic for three hours on a couch because the cookie I ate was too strong. Does that mean, does that mean booze is better? Because, because, because you don't have a fucking panic attack. Fine. You don't get a hangover on weed. It still burns you the fuck out and there's an after effect. All right. Number four comment. This is my favorite. This is my favorite of all of them. The wizard of Haas, 504. This is ridiculous. I learned how to drive stone. Stone. Not drive stoned. Drived stoned. AF as fuck. Passed my test with flying colors. What the fuck? Yes. Congrats, Haas. Congrats, Haas. You tricked the instructor. Congrats. It doesn't mean it's good to do all the time. Haas, you know what I've done? I've been pulled over by the cops when I'm drunk and talked my way out of it. It doesn't mean I should drive fucking drunk. When I was younger, I did it a few times. I got pulled. Haas, let me tell you a story, Haas. I once got pulled over. Well, excuse me. I didn't get pulled over. My friends and I were in the car. We were all drinking. We pulled over on the side of the road because I had to throw up. We pulled over the side of the road. A cop pulled up. I had my head in the bushes vomiting. A cop came up to me and goes, hey, man, what's going on over here? Are you okay? And I shooed the cop away like this. I went, I'm fine. I'm fine. Get out of here. And the cop left. That doesn't mean I should be driving or anybody should be driving in that state. It means I tricked a fucking cop that wasn't doing his job properly that night. I'm sorry to even suggest this. Perhaps your driving instructor doesn't give a shit. Perhaps he's not illuminated working at the DMV sitting next to somebody that reeks like cat piss doing their driving exam. We've got one more of these that we added at the last minute. What is the, can we pull that fifth? Is there a fifth? There it is. Oh my God. Tom, Tom, 82 cat, K-A-T. Tom, 82 cat. Absolutely zero car accidents caused by smoking weed. Two exclamation points, not three. I guess he kind of means it. He doesn't really mean it. A hundred percent of drunk drivers cause accidents and deaths. This fucking thing. Tom, where did you get this statistic? High Times? Where did you read this? You clearly don't read anything that's not print on a vape wrapper. It's, there, there are documented news stories. The big one when I was growing up was there was a train wreck and when they tested the guy's blood and urine after the train wreck, they found out he had marijuana in his system. He did not have booze in his system and there was a train wreck. A hundred percent, pull that back up again. I want to, I want to make sure I'm getting this right. I want to make sure I'm getting Tom Sillian point right. Everybody in this room, and what is there, four of us? Know that that's not true. I've done it. I never killed anybody. Never even ran into somebody. Got home. Got home. Got home. Clear. Here I am. Sitting here right now. People smoke weed and get into accidents. It happens. A breathalyzer can't detect weed. Okay. And just because you're not getting a piss and blood test on site when you get into that accident. Okay. Or you blow a breathalyzer clean and they can't give you a DUI, but they have to charge you for whatever happened with the accident. Doesn't mean that somebody on marijuana or high, whatever the fuck you want to call it, hasn't caused an accident before. It is such an insane claim. Now, okay. We can pull that. Now here's the thing. Uh, I, I, I know I'm making fun of all these people. Okay. I know I, I seem a bit dismissive of, uh, of the folks that, that wrote to us, uh, in response to this, to this clip that was put out. Uh, so I, I did go to their profiles, um, because I wanted to get a glimpse of their unaffected lives. I wanted to see how people completely unaffected by marijuana use live. And, uh, guess what? Zero followers, no followers, no posts, celebrity photos, instead of their profile pics, leave it to a bunch of weed smokers. They can't even rise to the challenge of social media. They're too fucking lazy to even post on fucking Instagram. All the profiles were private that I went to. They were all private, probably because these people are not doing anything worth showing anybody. And they're just associating with their fellow smoke smokers, which is so typical of weed people. Let's, let's just all keep it in the circle, man. Let's all just sit in the same room together, man. Just us, man, and our Xbox and our thoughts. No, no parties. Let's just sit here. Earn your fucking medicine. Earn it. Okay. Earn it. It's a first of its kind plan, created for how Texans actually use energy. TXU Energy. Hank joined BJ's Wholesale Club the day he became a father of 30. I coach football. Now, Coach Hank saves up to 25% off grocery store prices. 30 pounds of pasta, three cases of protein bars, 75 sports drinks. And that's just pregame. He knows teamwork, and BJ's knows savings. This is your home, Coach. Home of the Save. Join for just $20 at BJ's.com slash mesquite and save 10 cents per gallon for six months. Open soon. Limited time offer. New members only. BJ's. Home of the Save. Medicine. I say medicine. Okay? Why? Because we all use this or marijuana or whatever to self-medicate. That's what we're all doing. Here's the difference. You guys were told for the last decade or so, maybe even longer, that marijuana was medicinal, and now you think it's not a substance and you're not fucked up when you're on it. It's now happening also with mushrooms. It's now also happening with ketamine. People are taking ketamine like it's goddamn Tito's. This is crazy. Ketamine used to be, used to see people on the floor in the fucking bar because they did too much ketamine. People are taking it now. Because why? Because they have ketamine therapy. So now people think ketamine's not a fucking drug. It doesn't fuck them up. It's medicinal. It's medicinal. Jesus Christ, guys. You know what else used to be medicinal? Cocaine. Cocaine used to be medicinal. You know what else they used to do? They used to rub this. On the gums of babies. They used to rub whiskey on the gums of teething babies so the babies wouldn't cry. It was medicinal, guys. A lot of bad things were medicinal. You know why? Because we hadn't found the right medicine yet. And then they found medicine and they said, you know what? Let's fucking maybe not use coke anymore. Maybe let's not put whiskey in the baby's mouth. Maybe weed is not really something we should prescribe for any sort of pain you're feeling or whatever. It's not. Because I used to smoke weed. And I'm going to get to that because I'm going to be clear about a few things before I wrap this segment up. I used to smoke weed, okay? Back when it was a lot weaker. But when California was one of the only states where you could get a weed card because it was medicinal, okay? My hand to God. I went to the clinic to get the weed card. The doctor, I show up at the clinic. There's a guy, outside, doing devil sticks in a tie-dye t-shirt. Do you guys remember devil sticks? Do you know what I'm talking about? They're the things, okay, they're the things you see. They were big in the 90s. It's like up there with hacky sack. Yeah. It's like the things you see on the boardwalk and the guy is flipping the stick between the two sticks. That's a perfect picture. The guy with the cigarette in his mouth, it's perfect. I go to the weed clinic. There's a guy in front doing devil sticks, wearing a tie-dye t-shirt. I walk into the weed clinic. I check in. They send me into a room. They said, the doctor will be with you in a minute. Who walks in? The devil stick guy was the doctor. He was the doctor. This is crazy. He goes, why do you want your weed card? Does your back hurt? I go, no. He goes, does your back hurt? I go, no, my back doesn't hurt. Why do you want your weed card? Your back hurts, right? I went, oh, yeah, I have back pain. He goes, great. I should prescribe you marijuana. This is so nuts. This is so nuts. Guys, for Christ's sakes, can any of these things be used medicinally in theory? Yes. I think marijuana has been known to help, I believe, cataract issues at times, glaucoma, and of course, people that are in extraordinary pain, it can act as an immense help as a pain suppressant. I don't know what they were using Coke for in the 20s, but they were using it for something. And hey, whatever they were using it for, I'm sure it was a pain suppressant. It worked just fine and still theoretically could. And I'm sure still, if you rubbed whiskey on the gums of an old man with no teeth or a baby that is just getting teeth, it would feel great. But you can't use the medicinal thing as a cop-out to just use your substance and abuse it all the time. You have to respect your substance. This is what I'm getting at. It's a substance. Fucking respect it. Respect it. That's it. I'm not saying don't do it. I'm not saying you're wrong for doing it. Okay? I don't think alcohol is great and weed is bad. I don't think weed is bad. I just think both are substances and you've been pimped into this weed as medicinal idea and you're not respecting it as a substance anymore. Okay? And I will add to this, I used to smoke all the time. All right? But I smoked in the 90s when weed was shit. When weed was shit, you had to build fucking contraptions back in the 90s to get as high as you do from one hit of weed now. You had to build contraptions back in the 90s to get as high as you do from one hit of weed now. Gravity bongs. Taking hits out of three liter Gatorade bottles and shit like that. Why do you think they invented hot boxing? Because weed was good? No, weed was fucking terrible. And you had to immerse yourself in a sealed car inside of a cloud of it to get a decent high and you still weren't as high as you can get now from one hit of a strong strain. I promise you that. Okay? So just trust me on this math. In the 90s, weed was hard to get. And weak. Now, it's super easy to get and way too strong. And that's if you're even getting weed. A lot of you are smoking THCA, which is a fucking concoction of some kind. I don't fucking know what it is. And yes, people have died from things they've bought at dispensaries. That has happened. Not saying it happens a lot, but it has happened. Okay? So I quit smoking weed. Why? It got too strong for me. All right? And that's why. It got too strong. All right? It's not having an effect on you means you just ingest it all the time and you have a tolerance now, which could mean you're an addict. All right? And you know how addicts respond when you criticize their substance? "Shut the fuck up, pussy!" That's what addicts do. They get angry when you try to take the substance away or when you contradict it or criticize it or you say it's bad for them. All right? I might be an alcoholic. I'm an alcoholic. I don't think I am. I don't think I am. Why? Because when somebody says, "You know, that's really bad for you," I go, "Oh, God, no, it's terrible." I wish I didn't love it with all my heart. It's probably going to kill me. I admit it. I admit it. All right? Okay? I know I could drive a car completely fine after five drinks. Trust me on that. I could drive my car fine after five drinks. That's more than a lot of people have in a night. But I don't fucking know. I don't fucking know. I don't fucking do it. Okay? Why? Because I know legally I shouldn't be doing it. I'm not in the state to be doing it, even though I can pull it the fuck off. Okay? And I will close with this. Even the New York Times thinks weed has become a problem. They were massive advocates of the legalization. Here are just a few headlines they've run. It's time for America to admit that it has a marijuana problem. That's from February of this year. Go to the next one. Okay. Let's see. "Review of medical cannabis use finds little evidence of benefit. Researchers found a chasm between the health reasons for which the public seeks out cannabis and what gold standard science actually shows about its effectiveness." So there you go. That's right on point with the medicinal thing. Let's go to the next one. "Health risks from cannabis may grow as users age. More older people are using cannabis products regularly. But research suggests that there's a lot of risk in cannabis. Researchers suggest that cannabis-related health problems are also on the rise." And I think we have one more, right? Or was there only three? It was just three. Okay. There was only three. Hey, what do I know? I'm drunk. Folks, I'm telling you something right now, okay? If any major newspaper was going to agree with the marijuana sect of this country, it was the New York Times. It was the New York Times. But when even those cappuccino fuckers are talking about cannabis, they're not talking about cannabis. They're talking about the fucking cardigan, soft ass, no lifestyle choice is to be shamed or judged, kraut. When even they can't get behind the cannabis crusade, you're fucked. All right? Anyway, let's move on to the flight log. Let me get rid of these papers. I don't need any more. What do we got here? Oh. Did we get that on camera, the throwing? Oh, just like Letterman used to do. Well, from the graphic that you just saw, people, you might have guessed. This is a simple segment that's just devoted to the shit experience of flying. It's fucking awful. I have to do it all the time. A lot of us do. It's miserable. Uh. We're just going to highlight some of the examples of how bad it's fucking getting and continues to get. This is truly incredible. They're potentially bringing out standing airlines. This is from the Daily Mail. Low cost airlines will officially introduce standing only seats from 2026. It is happening. They will introduce, not might. They will introduce standing only airports. Standing only airplanes. Dear God. Where do you even begin with this? Okay. There's a reason they're going to have a standing only plane. They're going to tell you that that reason is so you can fly affordably again. Now, the carrot on that stick is because they have made flying virtually unaffordable to almost any average person in the country anymore. Uh. I flew on Southwest, okay, round trip. Remember when Southwest, remember when you flew Southwest and people would be like, is everything okay in your life? You know what I mean? Like, did you bottom out? Like what the, really? That's what Southwest was great for. It was cheap. It wasn't no, you know, no frills, right? But it was cheap. And you got in line like cattle and they said everybody in it once and you fucking punched and kicked and tried to get a good seat and that was it, but it was cheap and you could always get your money back. Southwest now has even fallen into this gouging behavior that all of these other airlines have pursued. They're doing all the gouging tactics that all the other airlines are doing. If you want to fly on Southwest now and still have the refundable option, you can now pick a seat, which is nice, okay, and you can pick an extra leg room seat. Now listen to me, people. These might sound like perks, but they're not perks, okay? Everybody should have an extra leg room seat because all an extra leg room seat means is you can sit like a human being, all right? It's not a luxury seat. It's a seat where your legs can fit properly, okay, if you're not somebody who is under five foot five, okay? That's all that is. Picking a seat is not a luxury, okay? Picking a seat is something you should be able to do if you are booking your flight with a responsible amount of lead up time, okay, or if you're booking your flight and maybe you're claustrophobic and a center seat freaks you out even more, or maybe you're somebody with a bladder issue and you need to sit on the aisle so you can get up frequently and pee. That is not a luxury, okay? These are all things you should be able to do. Refundable, we could argue back and forth on whether or not that's something you should get or shouldn't get. should be refundable within a certain time frame, but they're always going to charge extra. Anyway, I flew Southwest round trip. I believe it was to Nashville, which is not that far of a flight from Austin, Texas. It was a thousand dollars. It was a thousand dollars for the no frills airline that I didn't check a bag that would have cost more, whatever, a thousand dollars. That is where we're at, okay? That is where we're at. They took 9-11, they ran with it, okay? They fucking ran with it. They cried poor house, right? When nobody was going to fly, 9-11, everybody was freaked. There was all this new stuff with airline security. They ran with it. And then they got a second shot to double down and really fuck us with COVID, okay? And now here we are. Here we are. After 9-11 and COVID, it is unaffordable. It's unaffordable to fly. They have made it impossible. So what they're going to do is exactly what Uber and Lyft did with yellow cabs. Yellow cabs had us by the balls and we were all paying way too much money for a shitty experience in a yellow cab. So what happened? Uber and Lyft came along and said, hey, you know, it's less frills. You're going to be in the backseat of a guy's Nissan and it smells like garlic. But hey, it's affordable. So trade off even more of the basic human convenience. So that's what they're doing now. Hey, standing sucks. We know. But we want you to be able to fly. It's got to be affordable, guys. We're trying to help you out. Bullshit. We're trying to fit more seats and more people on the fucking airplane, okay? And trust me when I tell you, those standing flights will become popular out of necessity because people need to fly. They need to get places. They will start taking these flights. It will be the only affordable option because the other airlines, by the way, are now talking about introducing all first class flights and no first class flights, okay? And what that means is once all the seats are equal, there's no ceiling on price. If it's all first class or no first class, if all seats are equal, they can then say, fuck you, here's what it costs. That's it. That's it. What are you going to compare the cost to? There's no other seats in here to make a comparison right now. It costs this. People are going to take these standing flights. They're going to be cheap. We're all going to get pimped into this idea that it ain't so bad. And then these standing flights in a few years are going to be $1,000 round trip, just like Southwest used to be the dog shit option and now is too expensive for the average person. It's disgusting. Flying sucks. Flying is shit. Let's move on. What a world. What a world. Okay, people. I don't read the news because as you can see, I'm a troubled man and I got enough stress and anxiety in my life just from the day to day. I really try not to look at the news, which, you know, call me apathetic, I don't know. I just try not to look at it. So we've got headlines here. The wonderful producers here at Violin Horrendous are going to feed me headlines. I've never seen any of these and I'm hearing them for the first time and I'm just going to react to them. That's it, right? I think I explained it. I explained it pretty good, right? Oh, yeah. Oh, great. Great, guys. Thank you for the support. All right. Go ahead. I'm listening. All right. This first one is quadruple amputee cornhole pro says he fatally shot person in self-defense. Good for him. I don't know, man. Guy's got no. Did you say quadruple? Quadruple, yeah. He's got no. No arms, no legs. All right. So this is a guy that's probably easily threatened and doesn't stand much, a chance in a fight. And the fact that he got a nub into a fucking trigger and shot somebody in self-defense, God bless him. I don't know. Unless this guy's an asshole, you know? The drummer from Def Leppard only had one arm. He still beat his wife. I always could never wrap my head around that. Still got arrested for domestic violence. Do you imagine? That's terrible. Domestic abuse is terrible. Can you imagine a one-armed guy? You've got to call the cops. My one-armed husband beat me. They're like, what are you doing, lady? Just hold. You've got two hands. Hold the one hand behind his back. Unless she was like, I got no arms. Then I'd be like, oh, I get it. All right. So this next one is kind of a two-parter. So this one is sword-wielding man offers squatter removal service in California. Wait, what? Sword-wielding man offers squatter removal service in California. What is squatter removal service? So he advertises himself as the number one squatter removal service. And basically what he does is he coerces squatters in, you know, residences or buildings or whatever to leave the property because I guess the cops are not allowed to get involved with those sorts of things. Squatters' rights. So he does it with a sword like. I assume so. Like Princess Bride. Yeah. He goes, my name is Antigua. You squatted in my apartment. Prepare to die. Yeah, I guess it's some sort of katana or something, but. I got to be honest. I like it, man. Squatters are a fucking problem. Did you see the thing? Uh, remember that movie Young Einstein from the 90s with that guy, Yahoo! Serious? Does anybody remember that? This is, I'm showing my age. There it is. So this guy, this has a point. I'm not digressing. I'm digressing a little bit, but this is a point. This guy, his name was Yahoo! Serious. Or is, he's still alive. He was a no-name and he somehow convinced, he was in like one movie in Australia and he convinced an American studio that they should give him all this money and let him be. And he basically write, star, and I think maybe even direct in his own movie. I don't know how he did it. I don't know how he pulled it off. They let him make this movie, Young Einstein. This guy was a flash-in-the-pants celebrity for fucking seven seconds. This movie comes out. It's a train wreck of a fucking movie. It bombs like unbelievably. It's terrible. I saw it when I was like 10 and I was like, this movie blows. When you're 10, a movie's got to really suck for you to be like, this blows. I was talking about this guy recently with some friends of mine and I went online to see what he's up to now. He is squatting in a guest house or something with this couple in Australia who were nice enough to take him in because they found him living in his car and they remembered him from his celebrity days and they felt sorry for him and thought he was a nice man. So they gave him their guest room. On the first floor of their house or whatever. And the husband of the couple is having serious medical issues. They can't afford to have this guy in the house anymore and he won't leave and they can't get him out. He won't leave. And they said when they confronted him initially about leaving, he said, I'm not leaving. I'm important to the world. That 's what they said. They can't get him out. And this poor couple, the husband is like, again, battling all these really serious health issues. The poor woman, they're like in their 70s. She's literally, there's footage of her at the door on the news being like, please Yahoo, please leave. They shut off the power and utilities. He's still living in there. I don't know. It's crazy. I guess he's coming up with this. He's writing this book. He's writing a sequel script to young Einstein and they're doing God's work. Squatters are a real problem, man. Squatters rights are a real thing. And it's terrible. It's fucking terrible, man. It's yeah, I like it. This guy's going in with a fucking pirate sword. You better get the fuck out of here. All right. So here's the second part of this one. Owner of squatter removal business facing seven felony charges. Well, yeah, that's obvious. You're not allowed to do this. I just like that he's doing it. Yeah, you can't. It's insane. It's batshit that the guy's doing this. But but hey, yeah, just because I like it doesn't mean it's legal. You know, it's like prostitution. I'm a big fan. It's not legal. Anyway. I will not, do not incriminate me, I've admitted to nothing. um for i got another one please kind of ties in with that well you'll see south korean court jails american youtuber for public nuisance i think all youtubers should be jailed it's disgusting it's disgusting it's disgusting i was hanging out with uh i was hanging out with hinchcliffe last night we were having a martini at a very nice bar called the betty here in austin texas and i looked at him and i said tony i'm gonna be making youtube videos till i'm 90 like what what is the path here how do we how do we get out of this this is it we're all stuck in this horrible thing and uh most of you too it's i i hate that we i'm gonna be honest with you people i ymh thank you for this opportunity i don't want to be here i don't want to do this do we need this does anybody need this look at what we have to do what is going on there's no retirement anymore the internet's the only way out of anything and like anything else nobody's being responsible with any of it it's fucking crazy youtube is nuts instagram social it's all nuts we've devolved now to the point where people these ones drive me the most crazy like cooking influencers that purposefully like cook incorrectly and do disgusting things and say it's delicious and that your family will love it just so they get engagement of people being like you're disgusting this is rage bait right it's so gross to sink to that level of doing something like that to not even have the dignity to say i'm not going to put something like this out into the world just because it will it will work it's so gross to sink to that level of doing something like that to not even have the dignity and then the sadder part to me is the dumb fucks that'll be like no this is a good idea i'm gonna put ice cream in my dishwasher and make a casserole they should be jailed what what was the guy jailed for what did he do probably some dumb shit probably ran up to some korean politician and shot a fucking firecracker in his ear or something right you're close yeah yeah um so he had been kind of a problem for japan and south korea he just you know going into public places making acting a fool but for this particular thing he uh was recording himself kissing and twerking beside a statue commemorating wartime sex slaves oh jesus wait first of all korea's got statues of sex slaves erected they have that uh you know painful history well yeah but you don't make a bronze fucking statue of it right am i wrong here that's a crazy right i mean it says um you know they're trying to comfort people comfort women with a statue of a sex slave that's like that's like being like we want to comfort women we erected this statue of a sex slave this bronze mural of a woman with black eyes in the kitchen to make them feel that's a horrible right everybody's silent am i wrong here you're right all right am i on the wrong side of history with this no you're right it's a weird type type of statue to have i'm not saying it's from world war ii era um you know women were forced into sexual slavery by japanese occupying forces and that's terrible yeah it's not great that's terrible and they should not erase that history they should be teaching that history it's just kind of weird to do it with a statue a public statue yeah well of course a public it's not a private statue but i mean is it like in like the town square or is it like a museum because that's different too um it looks like it's just kind of like it's kind of outside public yeah that's nice so now the birds are shitting on this poor sex slave homeless people are pissing on it on homeless people i'm gonna refer back to our first segment people not sorry i'm not saying homeless people are regular pets not what i meant that's not what i meant but you know what i mean people do oh god well all right yeah no that's a fucking shitty thing to do i mean you got to be a real bonehead to go try to push the envelope in korea does anybody not understand anything god almighty man all right whatever uh that's okay let's let's let's move on i want to get to we're we're running short on time here and i want to get or do we have another one do we have a quick one i've got one more um so nyc santa con charity fundraiser was more con than claws authorities say yeah no shit have you ever seen a santa con guys yeah i've seen it i haven't been but i've seen it i have a bar in new york we we had to fucking put we have to put signs on the door no santa con allowed when they do santa con it's crazy santa con is insane it's a if you don't know what santa con is uh they'll do it like right before christmas obviously they're not doing it in like july and um a bunch of people dress up like santa claus and do a bar crawl and it is the worst day for bars in all of any city it happens in it is completely obnoxious they are completely drunk by the end of the day you got santa's pissing and puking everywhere it's a disaster many many bars put up signs that say no santa con santa con is a fucking nightmare and i love that it's the biggest in new york what a way to make all the jewish people of new york feel comfortable is an army of drunken screaming santa claus is taking over the city for an afternoon uh so what happened at this thing uh so i guess the guy stefan pildes or whatever his name is uh the guy that runs it siphoned like half of uh all the donated funds that they would receive and they're going to be doing it for the rest of their lives and they're going to be doing it for the rest of their lives and they're going to be doing it for the rest of their lives and they're going to be doing it for the rest of their lives and like half of uh all the donated funds that they would receive from santa con that they were supposed to donate to charity he would just take it and just use it for his own personal gain this is this is where we're at this country deserves to go down the fucking toilet this is where we're at that people are donating money to santa con this is the way to get to the people in need santa con let me yeah don't donate to the fucking organizations that have been around for a long time a long time 50 or 60 or 80 years trying to help disenfranchised groups of people or the homeless or whoever now give it to santa con yeah oh this guy's drunk and he just shit himself in a santa suit yeah here's 10 000 i trust you get it to the right place all right folks let's move on to our final full segment of the show this is pig talk okay uh this segment is pretty simple um and we're gonna have you know let's put it on the bottom of the screen here because i don't know what the email address is it'll be violent horrendous at gmail.com there you go violent horrendous at gmail.com it's on the screen when you have uh your own uh experience that you want to share with your friends and family and you want to share it with us email us your story there uh and and what this is is i want you to tell me about a time that you encountered somebody or something that was violent horrendous in our society culture day to day whatever okay uh or it can be about a time that you maybe acted in a vile and horrendous fashion and you're not so proud of it uh either way okay but this is where we get to know the people that are out there um we do have uh one for our initial episode here uh this was uh from uh robin with a y which i thought only the singer robin spelled it that way maybe this is from her i don't know i doubt it is because the subject line was fat bitch ate my pie all right uh i am 27 f living with a 25 f roommate i thought that was the apartment number for a second it means i'm realizing it means 27 year old female living with a 25 year old female all right not a big age difference it used to be just us but after she got pregnant her boyfriend moved in that's never good uh nothing wrong with getting pregnant but when you're with somebody you you're living with somebody then they get pregnant then the boyfriend moves that's that's that's going to be tough uh at first it was fine they were quiet no complaints but as her pregnancy progressed she started getting more let's say entitled especially with my stuff she'd regularly eat my food and casually brushed it off as pregnancy cravings when i brought it up annoying but i was able to move past it nice enough that's kind of you the breaking point was when i brought it up and i was able to move past it and i was able to home a small personal pumpkin pie labeled it with my name and put it in the fridge you know you're in a bad spot when you got to treat your fridge food like you're at the office and put your name on it this is bad. And there's only three of you in the house. You all know whose food is what. Later that night, I found her standing there in the kitchen eating the entire thing, not just a slice, the whole pie. Well, you said it was a small personal pumpkin pie, but now you're saying the whole pie. Is anybody eating a personal pie slice by slice? You're cutting it up? Shove the whole fucking thing in your mouth. That's what you do with it. Anyway, that set me off. I confronted her asking why she was eating my food when she knew it wasn't hers. She started crying, saying she's pregnant and couldn't help the craving. I snapped and told her I don't give a fuck about her pregnancy or her baby. It's a little harsh. Jesus Christ. I was with you, Robin. You're losing me. She was so shocked, she ran to tell her boyfriend, who then came out and called me a bitch for yelling at a pregnant woman who can't control her cravings. Now, I'm wondering, was I out of line for saying that? Signed by Robin. Look, yes, of course. Of course, you were out of line for saying, let me get the quote right. I don't give a fuck about your pregnancy or your baby because you ate my tasty cake pie that I brought home. Yeah, that's an overreaction, Robin. It's an overreaction, but it's a high-stress situation, and you went wrong with allowing the boyfriend to move in. I get that you were trying to be kind, but at some point, you have to say, look, this situation is not going to work for a lot of reasons, and you guys need to go through your situation the way you need to go through it, so we've got to figure out a solution here. I'm not saying that's easy, especially in this day and age with rent prices and everything else, but that's something you have to address right off the bat. You swallowed too much, okay, and then when you saw her eating your pie, you said, you know, I want to be swallowing pie, not fucking anger and disdain and resentment, and you snapped. It is harsh. However, her excuse of I can't control myself is absolute horseshit, and what the fuck is his boyfriend doing? Why isn't he going out and buying her pies, right? That's his goddamn job. I have a feeling he's not going to be much of a provider, when that kid is born. So yeah, Robin, I think you're both wrong here, but I also think that your response is the result of a lot of bad behavior on her part, so I'm going to give you the pass on this one and say if they can't give you forgiveness with you offering a sincere apology and they're not willing to change their behavior, well, then they're just completely wrong and out That's my take. Let us know if you agree with my take down in those comments. Let us know what you think about anything I said down in those comments, because that's how these shows work. You got to let us know what you think. I'm sure the weed people are going to be telling me a lot. I do want to point out, though, Robin, under great duress and immensely underfed and hungry, possibly hallucinating from a lack of food intake because her pregnant roommate is eating all her stuff, still wrote with exquisite grammar. And this was a full letter, not a three-sentence Instagram comment. Anyway, folks, that is our show. We are going to close out the episode with what possibly is my favorite segment of the show. This is very simple. This is called White Women's. White Women's. And this is just a segment. We're going to close out. This is just a dedication demonstrating how we have shattered the psyche of white women in this country. These women are losing their shit. There is no shortage of white women losing. They have snapped. They have snapped. These dames have gone off the deep end. I'll let the behavior speak for itself. We're going to roll the clip, and I'll see you next time. Follow us. Subscribe. Smash that like button on YouTube. Subscribe to the show. We're going to be doing this every other week, the first and third week of the month. These episodes will be dropping. We want you to stay with us. We want to have fun. We hope you enjoy it. We'll see you for the next episode. White women, take us out of here. We are free and unafraid, and we'll stop your racist raids. Yes, we are free and unafraid, and we'll stop your racist raids. Let's lift it up. Let's put it down. Let's run this game on the whole damn town. Yeah. Take it up. You gotta put it down. Yeah. It's called Free Nights in Cool Summer. You get free nights every night all year long, plus a 25% bonus toward your daytime use all summer. Discover how much more you could save with Free Nights in Cool Summer. TXU Energy. Rep number 10004.