Week 51: Year in Review + We Bought a House w/ Guest Christina

Welcome to the first year dad podcast. My name is TJ Lacey, I have just recently become a dad and on this podcast I am sharing my journey each week during my first year of the dad life. Thanks for tuning in and enjoy the episode. Hello, hello and welcome to the first year dad podcast. This is TJ and it took us just a little bit longer than we expected to get this episode recorded. It had a fun distraction going on in the Lacey household that we will touch on, but it's finally time to get back two more episodes remaining. And as we've said previously on episode 51, we're going to be joined for the third time by Christina. Christina. Hello, hello, third time in last time. Third time in last time. And the last time you were on here, you received a lot of praise from the people about being such a professional podcaster. Does that as I make you feel coming into this one? I feel like I should have a career change. There we go, professional podcaster. All right, so yeah, on this episode, we're going to look back at some of the highlights during our first year as parents. We're going to talk through some of the most recent events that I've gone on since the last time Christina was on with the wedding. We had Liam's first birthday. We're sending him off the daycare, all that fun stuff. And then we're going to talk about what's coming next and spoiler alert. The reason that we were distracted the last two weeks is that we bought a house and are going to be moving to the suburbs. So we will touch on that at the end. So of course we're going to talk about the first year as parents. Christina, we made it. I know I ask you this all the time, but can you believe that it's been one year with Liam? My answer all the time is, no, I can't believe it's been a whole year. It went by so fast. Yeah, I can't believe it. It goes by super, super fast. When you kind of think of the first year as a mom, what are some of the first things that come to your mind? I totally agree that it goes by. Crazy, crazy fast. What are some of the highlights that strike your mind first? It's just all been so wonderful and so awesome. It was so nice to have so much time off with him and spend all that time with him and with you, the three of us having so much time to bond and get to and know each other in the beginning was fun. And then, I'd say the second half, just him starting to have his little personality and he keeps getting bigger and it breaks my heart in ways because he's never going to be tiny again. He's just going to keep getting bigger and that's so hard to grapple with, but he's just such a cute, awesome little man. So it really has been just simply the best. We have one of those little aura frames that is always showing old pictures and I feel like multiple times today. We're just like, oh my God, look how little he was when I never had pictures of him come up from when he was so small. Yeah, it's so crazy because he looks the same yet so different and I'd say in the past month, he's starting to look more like a toddler and not a baby. It's just the strangest feeling, how your heart aches and is just so excited at the same time, but it's definitely a unique feeling that I think only, I don't know if you go through that, but mom's definitely going through it. Yeah, I don't go through it quite as much, but I totally agree that you're starting to look much more like a toddler than a baby whose hair is starting to get long and those curls going and just looking more and more like an actual person which is so crazy. What's one piece of advice you give yourself a year ago? You could go back in time, pre-Liam Christina, what does future Christina say or would you do everything exactly the same? That's a good question. I honestly, I think I would do it all the same. If I was giving someone else advice, not myself, because I think I took this advice that others told me and I just had some self-reflection before I went into it, it's not going to be perfect and you kind of just have to let things go and savor all of those moments because you're not going to get them again. You just keep getting bigger and so I'm glad that the house is a little bit messier. The cleaning lady comes more often. I really prioritized him and also just letting things go that I probably wouldn't have let go before in the past. Just don't sweat the small stuff, just enjoy it is really what I would say. I feel like with us too, it was nice. We had kind of four distinct segments throughout the year as I was kind of looking back and thinking about it. There's the first month or two which is basically just survival mode, craziness, adjusting to having a new little human in the household. Then there was a couple of months after that where you were at home and all maternity leave and then I had my little segment where after you were back to work and then I was back as I stayed home to add and then the most recent we've been in is everybody back to work and send in Liam off to daycare. How has these last what has it been two months? Not even a month. It's only been a month. Wow. And one of those weeks he didn't even go to daycare because he was sick. But how's the adjustment of sending him to daycare been balancing work and being a mom? I honestly, I think it's more of an adjustment for you because I've been working since August. And he only goes part time so I still get to see him on half of the week basically. But I think that's been more of an adjustment for you of that change because for me not much has changed. You know dropping him off and I don't see we don't see him during the day. I know he's having fun. Of course he's attached to all the adults there because he's been around adults so much. But I think that question's more for you I think. Yeah, it's definitely not the same as being able to see him all day every day. But it's been it's been a nice adjustment. Nice and quiet in the house when he's not here, which is good. And we still get a couple picture updates from our daycare every day. So that's always nice. I feel like I'm always texting you like did you get any pictures of him? But now I'm on the group text, too. So yeah, and I feel like he's really been enjoying daycare. He can tell when you drop him off he like reaches for the door now, which is fun. Although when he was out for the week and then I took him on Monday, he cried that time. So it can kind of be different every day. But it seems like Monday is just the constant readjustment not just for Liam but for lots of the kids. They like forget that they go to daycare after the weekends. Yeah, he survives. Doing well. Another recent event was Liam's birthday. How was that whole kind of process for you? I know we ended up in a really good spot, but we were originally searching for different options and things to do. How did you feel in the planning of Liam's birthday and then how it all ended up working out? Well, I've been Liam's birthday. It came so fast and I wanted to do some special things with him, obviously. And I think for me, you know, I didn't want to spend, do like a huge hoopla birthday party. But I did want to see our friends and invite our family and also I wanted to just kind of focus on Liam. So I'm happy with where we ended up where we ended up having just family over on his birthday and we had dinner and birthday cake and he got to play with all of his aunts and uncles and his grandparents. And then that Saturday we just had a bunch of friends go bowling and that was really fun too. I think the hard thing is even when you want something simple, when it's for 50 people, there's planning required and there's money required. So that it doesn't just happen, you know, and that part can get stressful just with working full time. But I'm happy with how it went. It was kind of exactly exactly what I wanted. So I don't know how do you feel. It was really a lot of fun. The Thursday night when the aunts and uncles came over. He was in a particularly good mood, I feel like, which was great. Sometimes he could be overly clingy to you or me or whoever, but I felt like that night. He was really spending time with all the different aunts and uncles and they all got time with him there. Seeing him with the cake was cute. I love the video that we have of him eating the cake. It's just like dead silence for 20 seconds. Everyone just watching him. Sixteen people just staring at this baby and he's just so cautiously picking up little pieces of cake. So cautiously. So cautiously. But yeah, that was a lot of fun. And then one of the other things with his birthday was that his aunts and uncles all all chipped in to get a season pass to the Elmwood Zoo. So that's gonna be on our upcoming to-do list. We think we're gonna be aquarium, but I feel like he's gonna really like the zoo, especially at the stage now. - We also got a gift from my Aunt Mary for the aquarium. So we got a lot of fun things to go do with him. It's gonna be fun 'cause he's just so much more interactive with things and getting into that little toddler spot. So I think it's gonna be fun doing all that stuff with him this summer. So yeah, and spring. I guess spring is just starting. So. - Spring just starting summer around the corner. I feel like it's gonna be a crazy summer with him. We go down the Jersey Shore a lot in the summer. Last week, last year, he was obviously just a baby, but it was already notably not quite as relaxing sitting on the beach. And I feel like this year is gonna be even more crazy. He's probably gonna be walking by then and running around all over, but you're looking forward to this summer with basically a toddler on our hands. I feel like. - I know, it's gonna be crazy, but it's gonna be so fun. We're gonna be tired on the beach. Last summer was hard. The reason you were tired is just 'cause you constantly had to hold him. And that was exhausting. - True. - And everybody always wants to hold the baby until they're trying to get a son tan on the beach. (laughs) And we spent a lot of time in the shade last summer with him. And this year, he's gonna be lathered up with a lot of sunscreen running around. So that's gonna be fun. - Yeah, it'll be less sitting holding him more, just chasing him wherever he goes or trying not to get in there runaway from us. That'll be fun. At least I feel like we have a good handle of the packing of stuff. I also felt like the first couple of times we went to the beach. I would go back and forth four times because we would keep realizing we forgot something. - Yeah. I also remember recently, I forget where we were going, but we had a pack for an overnight for him. And he were like, "Is this all the stuff we need?" 'Cause he's just a little bit bigger and we don't need. As much as we needed in the beginning, which is just funny that it's the way you, the things you need change so quickly. - Like that first time we packed up the car. I mean, it looked like we were moving. But we had a full trunk, have to put the seat down. All his different things. And yeah, now it's relatively low touch in it. - Yeah, we also have like double items in many places now. - Sure, we built that up over the last year. - Yeah. - So what he goes to is grandparents or beach or whatever he's got. - Yeah. - Now plenty of things. But speaking of our car, looking like it was packed up ready to move. Soon we will be actually packing up a moving truck, leaving the city and moving into our new house and plimit meeting. - Yes. - Now can you believe that and how quickly it happened? - How quickly but how long? - It happened very true. - Slow, what did I say? Slowly and then all at once. That's essentially what happened with this house. We've been low key looking for probably 18 months, I would say, a year and a half. And then saw a house that we really liked pop up, went and visited it on a Thursday, did all the paperwork on Friday, sent in an offer Saturday and had an offer accepted Saturday night. - Yeah. - Crazy 48 hour period. As you like to say, it's pretty nuts how you just walk through a house for, I don't know, 15 minutes and then say, okay, yeah, take all my money now. I'm gonna live here forever. - I know, it's crazy. - Yeah, but it's gonna be so awesome. And yeah, it was definitely, I'm so happy, I mean, everything just happens when it's supposed to happen because it was really nice having a full year of Liam in this house. We got to have holidays with him and like Christmas was so nice with him. And you know, this was really where our start was with him. So I'm so thankful that we did have the timing that it did. It feels like it's kind of like the end of a chapter. Now we're starting a next chapter. And I really like where those bookends ended up. So that's been, I'm excited for that. So I'm gonna miss so many things, but it's gonna be really fun being in the, in the Vickery House where he's got space and a yard and families close, we're leaving some family closer to other family. So yeah, it's exciting. - The timing really does feel perfect, pretty much hitting exactly at the one year mark. We'll miss the city, but I think once we're out of here, we're gonna be happy to be out, but anything in particular that you feel like you'll miss about the city or that you wanna take advantage of in these last two months before we head on out to the burbs. - I mean, the perk of city living is just the access, you walking access, you have to so many things. You just plop them in the shoulder, walk and get coffee or you can go to restaurants and even walk into his daycare, just those little things of that convenience factor. Now on the flip side, there's a lot of things that aren't convenient. But I think those are the things that all miss the most or even like Liam loves to look out the front window. We have this big window in the front of our house and he stands on the ledge and just looks out at anything that's out there. And it's just an image and a memory that I'll always have of this house if I'm doing that 'cause it's just so sticking cute. And you know, we won't look out the window at other things, but just the excitement and hustle bustle of a city street is a little bit different than a cold of sack in the suburbs. - At one point I asked you, you think Liam will remember this house and you're like, no, he's one. - Oh yeah, you're right. - Yeah, we'll remember it. - We'll remember it. - We'll have plenty of pictures and videos of it. - That was a good house and we're planning to still keep the house and run it out. So the house will be moving on to someone else, but yeah, we'll miss it. This was also, I feel like, where we essentially met and started our life together. So that is nice. And then one other thing that is a little bit unfortunate with the timing is our, my brother and his wife, Amy, are having their little one in late May. So we're, and they live down the street from where we are. So it's a bummer that we won't be neighbors with them during that, but I've already got plenty of plans to come down here. I got my haircut, guys. So I'm gonna come down to the city, get my haircut, hang out with Denise. - Yeah, there you go. - What's their name, Denise? - No, hang out with Denise. - Oh, Denise. I thought you were here. Your hair guys, they was Denise. - No, not quite. Not quite. Yeah, I go to, yeah, my hair stylist, Denise. - Yeah. - All right. Anything else that kind of sticks out to you, as we wrap up. - Oh, it's been a good year. This has been fun. I've really enjoyed listening to you. Give this little podcast, quick time every week just to kind of reflect. It's gonna be such a nice diary that we have of the first year of having Liam. It's been a really wonderful time, and I can't wait to see how he just keeps growing and the little person he becomes. And I just can't wait to watch him grow. And I'm really thankful that you did this. And it's nice to have a little part in it. And I'm sad to see it end, but we'll just keep going, right? - Onwards we go. Thanks for joining for the final time as a guest, three time guest on the podcast, Christina. Thanks to all of you out there for tuning in. I'll be back with one more quick wrap up episode to really finalize things. But that'll do it for today. (upbeat music) Peace. (upbeat music)