Wearing The Same Size As Your Girl - Episode 251

Tammy regularly hauls stuff to her kids at college. That's why she shops at BJ's Wholesale Club, saving up to 25% off grocery store prices. Beef jerky, microwave meals, laundry pods, even they can't screw up. Have you met my kids? And with BJ's gas, she gets there for less. They call me the road warrior. This is your home, road warrior mom. Home of the Save. Join for just $20 at bjs.com slash mesquite and save 10 cents per gallon for six months. Open soon. Limited time offer, new members only. BJ's. Home of the Save. You know what's being lost right now is, you know, shout out to International Women's Century. You know, shirts on sale right now. But what's being lost is, like, men knowing how to approach a woman. I'm not talking about, like, whatever conversation happens between you and that woman after you introduce yourself. That's between y'all. I'm not here to give relationship advice. But the approach I've been seeing, like, the couple that I've caught have been, like, crazy. I literally seen a dude go up to a girl and say, I just saw someone in that dress last week. You look way better than her. That's not bad, though. That's crazy. That's not a bad shot. No, no, no, no. Putting down another woman to get another woman is crazy. Come on now. That's what you got to do sometimes. Women like it. Yeah, yeah. They like that. Nah, that was crazy. She threw a drink in that nigga's face. Really? Nah. Save dude. Save dude. She said, that was me. Oh. No, for real. Go get your shirts, though. Unless you don't like women. I think they might be sold out. You think they sold out by now? Yeah. A lot of the sizes are already pretty low. But not all the sizes. Not all the sizes. So you big niggas, y'all still got a chance. Some big ass shirts left. Yo, yo. That's not what we doing. Hello. Hey, the radio is for people who are driving. The radio is for people who are driving. Yeah, I'll drive now. Okay, then. Welcome to Crash Dummy's podcast. Anyway, welcome to Crash Dummy's podcast. What episode is this? It doesn't matter what episode it is. It's in the title. Chicago. Somebody's always getting mad the way I say it, but I don't care. What's the other way? Chicago. Chicago. What'd you say? Chicago. Oh. Okay. Maybe I'm off the loop, too. Tickets are pretty low, so please get your tickets. By the time you guys are hearing this, it'll already be probably Wednesday. So hopefully you're not sold out by then. You got one day to get your tickets. Yeah, yeah. You literally should be online right now. Just literally let go of the wheel. Grab your phone. Fuck traffic. We'll wait for you. We'll wait for you. Yeah, yeah. Like and subscribe the podcast, obviously. Patreon. We got CrashDummyMerch.com. CrashDummy's live. Atlanta, Nashville, after Chicago, we're going to see y'all. So get your tickets. Don't wait till last minute. Come on. New York is very low tickets. Like, it could be sold out by the time this is out. So don't wait on that. We might do a second show. We might not. We don't know yet. Yeah, yeah. Depends on how the party's looking. You know, we just got a Soho membership, so we don't know. It's either Soho or another show. It's either Soho or So Long, nigga. Since we're on tour, a thought came to me. It was that it is really fun to. Party in other cities. Because no one knows who you are. And it's like, you're never going to see these people again. So you legit can just try shit. Exactly. Like, I would try a random dance. Like, this nigga don't know me. You know that? Like, I don't know how to do the Dougie, but this would be the place I would try the Dougie. Nah, you're going to end up on TikTok. Nah, in North Dakota? Nah. That shit going to make it to TikTok. Like, why is this nigga Mike Walter? What's hurting him? Nigga, what's hurting him? Fargo, North Dakota. Nah, that'd be crazy. You thought we wouldn't see this shit? I felt like if twerking was my thing, I would never do it in public. It would just be my own private thing. Nah, that's actually so crazy. Because there's definitely dudes that are out here that are good at twerking, and they don't want to be good at it. You know what I'm saying? Like, they'd definitely be like, damn, this is crazy. Ain't shit I can do with this talent. How are they figuring out they can. They can do that talent. Oh, them niggas. Probably had to ask it. Them niggas know. They've been pushed before. They're like, don't push me. The fuck was that? The fuck? I can make this motherfucker move how I want it to move. Niggas, I want my hips to tell the truth. I want my hips to stop lying to me. That's why I be looking at the dudes that dance in a club. I be looking at them weird. Because it's like, you can do any dance. To me, like, them dudes that be in the middle of the club dancing, and they can hit every move, that nigga can twerk. The nigga can twerk. No, that's not. Do you feel like it's weird for men to dance out in the club? Like, how do y'all dance? Because it is kind of weird if you're just doing TikTok dances. With a woman in front of me. That's how it is. Okay. That's fair. I do the Suge Knight. Just choke my girl. We just rock it out. I feel like everybody has their own thing that they do that's fun for them in clubs. Yeah. Like, is the straight break. Is the straight break dancing and the crumping against each other kind of funny to me? Yes. Would I do it? Probably not. But if those people are enjoying themselves, then it's like, I really can't be too, like, pressed about it. It's still funny to me, but I just wouldn't do that. Also, I don't know how to dance like that, so. I'm not getting in a dance battle, because I'm like a. I'm a medium dancer. Like, there's nothing like. You know what you can do. Yes, exactly. So, like, I'm going to lose. I'm going to lose to a good dancer, and then I'm going to lose to a terrible dancer, because everybody's just like, we've seen your moves before. This nigga. He's like an ass. He's so ass that we're actually all about to cheer him on, and you still lose. So, it's just like. It's just like a lose-lose situation. Especially if you're going against, like, a nerdy white boy. Exactly. Or, like, an Asian dude. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Who keep doing this. It's the same shit, though. He keep doing the same shit. Because if they don't look the part, it always, like. And they don't look the part, it kind of amplifies, like, their skills as well. Exactly. That's always the thing, though. That's, like, the thing with anything. It's like, with boxing, sports, when somebody doesn't look like they fit the part and they're talented, they get way more credit. Yeah. That's why it goes viral more when, like. You remember that one time that white girl was going viral for, like, mouthing a little baby lyric? Mm-hmm. When things are out the norm. And I know that whole song. Yeah. How is she any better than me? Yeah. I got Tommy, too. Because Tommy be dancing here. Is that his name, right? Yeah, but he black, though. He partially black. Yeah, yeah. He's 25% black. What? Yeah, yeah, yeah. We found that out, too. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Never knew that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Shout out, Tommy. Happy Black History. Hold on, though. I ain't saying all that. He still can't say nigga, but. He can dance. That's our boy. You can do whatever you want. Shout out to Tommy, bro. No, shut up. No, that's my guy. Oh, somebody sent me something. They tagged us on TikTok. I don't know why I never check our mentions. Yeah. Bro, we literally get mentioned, like, 10 times a day. Yeah. And we don't check them. Not. Because most of them be bullshit. People be, like, tagging us in, like, dark humor. Like, people tagged us in, like, a DV dark humor thing. Yeah. And I had to DM that person, like, never tag us again. Yeah. This shit not funny to us. You lame-ass nigga. I just wanted you to know that. But somebody tagged us in this, and they said, when I'm enjoying a podcast, then realize I'm genuinely a friendship cuck. Is it because they're like, we don't know them in real life? Because we don't know them in real life, and then they're watching our dynamic, you know what I mean? Like, we're all friends in real life, so they feel like a friendship cuck. Like, they watching us, like. No, I'm friends with y'all. Some of y'all. I'm friends with some of y'all. No, no, no. You niggas are cucks. What is a cuck? Work that down for me. Oh, y'all know what a cuck is? No. Oh, my God. Oh, wow. This is perfect. Okay. Oh, shit. Listen. Wow, this is interesting. So, a cuck is someone who gets off on their partner having sex with other people while they watch in the same room. So, usually, like, cuck, like, somebody. I saw that chair over there on live, and they said that's a cuck chair because that's usually where the partner. It's, like, away from everything. Yeah. With a good view. It could be men or women, but it's majority men that do it, that, like, want to. And most of the time, it's because in the situations I've seen, because we had somebody on the podcast that was also a cuck, it's because the woman wants to sleep around, and the guy just, like, wants to be there, so they have some type of open relationship. But usually, like, in open relationships, it's always, like, mismatched because it's easier for a woman to find a partner than it is a man, especially if you, like, talking about open relationships because niggas don't care. You think it's harder for a guy to. What? To be an open. I always, like. If he's ugly. No, I don't. Anywhere, like. You think so. Yeah, man. Right, it depends on, like, what you're going for. Okay, like, you can just take a couple. Let's say the couple, they're both, like, sevens on the scale of, like, whatever they're being rated on. If they say, hey, we're both going to go to a club and see how quickly we can leave with somebody to hook up with. A woman can literally walk into 720. In about 10 minutes, she found a dude and they're walking out of there. That dude is literally probably in handcuffs because he's like. Nigga, why are you around here asking girls for sex? He's in jail talking about. She's talking about, I'm almost finished, baby. I'm going to come get you out. I hate this game. That is true. That's what a cuck is, though. interesting so they're saying so there's a friendship cuck yeah like you enjoy someone's friendship from afar and you're not involved that sounds so sad they sound lonely yeah i feel like it's for like if you label it as a cuck it's like because you enjoy it though it's not like it's not a bad thing they like that they like watching the pod so we're not calling our listeners i think but also y'all gotta realize like bruh i know that's gonna sound crazy but we get lonely too bro like we're not all we're not always together like i know it looks like we enjoying ourselves and we are i know it looks like we got a lot of money and we do and i know i for one do not have a lot of money i know it look like we got nice cars we do but it's like you think our life better than yours it's all about perspective that's crazy that's crazy no there's definitely a couple there's definitely a lot of listeners that have way more money than me no fuck no you don't think so not than me i hate when i do that because like people are gonna tell you you think you're for real youtube listeners are probably like dying like oh that's so childish but the audio listeners like man it's evil motherfucker and i never realized why they thought i was so evil and then you i started listening to us on audio sometimes just to see how my voice here and i'm like damn i sounded serious as fuck when i said that like them niggas probably think i'm a damn evil person and you're right fuck them all is it me or does money not seem real when you're in other countries if i don't like when i'm in like sweden or like mexico like it says it's pesos right or sec right it's what pesos pesos pesos pesos what how would you say pesos pesos okay the the the number i see on there doesn't i don't do the conversions in my head right away so i'm more inclined to buy something that in another country than i would that's on purpose you think so oh yeah but it's more easy to spend that money they don't even put the dollar amount next to it right i think it's just a weird concept also now i'm thinking about it it's because everything is necessary at that point yeah right like in america i can go save money because i don't have food in the fridge but it's just like if i go somewhere to get food while we in london nigga i gotta buy that if i come here buy a shirt i gotta buy a shirt that says i was in london or some shit also imagine if like here in america like all our our dollar signs our tags had like different currencies on it yeah it was just too much the one thing you know something i dislike sometimes is when you go to expensive restaurants sometimes they don't even put the price on the on the menu and when they don't put the price on the menu it makes me feel like it's like you're playing roulette in a sense it's like oh that sounds like that sounds expensive that's if you're on a date yeah oh my gosh how embarrassing oh man no price no price on the menu and you always have to act cool when the bill comes no matter what you can't you can't break under pressure i don't even look at that no i'm at the point now where i don't look i don't look because i kind of have a gauge too because like usually i'm just going out to eat with my girl so it's like it's pretty easy to gauge just like just take i know how much everything is going to be yeah so i've never really been surprised on the on the prices of things that's the only thing i enjoy now that's the only thing that makes me feel like i have more money than i did 10 years ago is not paying attention to like what i eat and what i order but what is the group of four the no we usually if we eat together it's definitely it's always a business thing oh always a business that's probably the bad part about us we're so dumb like if you took like if okay if we took like five thousand dollars of the business account twenty five hundred dollars each i'm that twenty five hundred dollars i'm stingy with it like oh okay give my mama a couple honey give my sister ah nothing else you know what i'm saying but like if it's five thousand in a business account and we had a bar we like get this shots on us shots on us like it's not the same fucking money like we went we did the chicago show and all the money we earned from the chicago show we spent it on shots for the people that came to the fucking chicago but we gave it right back to the fans and shit who the fuck are we well we we already went to so we're gonna try and make money we're trying to make an experience never again though no i'm sorry chicago i know chicago very spoiled as far as like the mixer thing we are not doing the mixer like that was like a one-on-one thing that was like a one-on-one thing maybe we'll slide that was more of a celebration for us doing our first live show they'll love you forever though yeah yeah yeah we locked it we like ig friends with some of you no we follow like at least like 20 of them like we real cool i'm invested in some of their lives some of y'all making crazy ass mistakes like you you need to leave that nigga crazy mistakes but you're not cool enough with them to like call them out on it yeah yeah just like like bruh should i leave him i'll be like come on put the voting poll up so i can vote on this you click on some shit like yes and then you see that shit only 19 i know we like this nigga chat yeah okay the shade room back in i'm not fucking with the shade room no more i guess i really never was but like i don't like the way they put information out instead i like if you're gonna be nasty be all the way nasty i would appreciate that a lot more they they had like a tweet about 21 seven to say roomies did you know 21 savage is already a boy and girl dad here's everything to know about his three kids plus their moms that's so messy that is crazy that is so crazy to like to me like to even make if someone is famous to make an article about any family family member that's also not trying to pursue being famous it's crazy like okay if my cousin a rapper and then the shade room people i said we got the biggest podcast in the world and my cousin's a rapper he'd do something dumb in the shade room pick it up so be it like yeah and they was trying to pursue something but to like go after like my sister or something like that that doesn't have anything and then like to make an article about them is like crazy what's in the name so i feel like people go there for that but it's like they could have been did that and i'm sure they've done it before it's just the timing now because of this whole lotto situation everybody is on my girl a lot of people i've seen it was a meme about like i've seen y'all congrats a lot see that y'all did y'all got actual friends and people were kind of getting on like her for like 21 savage thing yeah i think because she her big thing was like oh she doesn't have a high body count yeah and then she used to make fun of people for being just a baby mama and shit like that so she never really made fun of people she mentioned it like we know the big mama no kids everybody liked that line but i don't think she ever was like going in on people who was just a baby mama no no no i get that but i believe that's all rappers though like gz rap about selling coke and then the nigga's son is smart as hell damn they're valedictorian so it's just like nigga you had me ready out here to bust some bricks down old time your son get a college education so it's just like i feel like as a rapper you gotta kind of contradict yourself because there's no way you could be living your life yeah we've seen what happened when rappers live their life i also heard that the reason why 21 doesn't really show his face in the pictures with her is because uh he's innocent and for citizenship reasons and allegedly allegedly and if he does show his face in it it does kind of when you're kind of going through the green card uh process that can kind of like mess with it because so he kind of has his way out no matter what yeah that's true yeah got a good exit plan too yeah i just wonder how long they can go without being seen together yeah we have not seen them together not one time it's like now you got a whole kid yeah home bodies you know got to be yeah you got to be yeah at that point yeah i just i just sent you a video since we own celebrity uh relationships the goat celebrity relationship to me is uh jaded pinkett smith and will smith like that's y'all don't think that that's literally the best relationship that we've ever had on the internet ever i they give us something every single year like you just want to be entertained yes okay this video i think is like if her and will smith will uh she says jada pickett smith speaks on whether she'll ever let her husband will smith move back in with her are y'all living together it's just this beautiful connection probably we will look at that not right now but you will yeah oh yeah that's why do you say that with such clarity um because that's that's what it's gonna be that's where it's headed yeah and you both are on that page yeah and you know but right now i really do enjoy my space yeah you know i've been living with you for a long time i've been living with you for a long time i've been living i'm alone i am a i am a my mother's only child right and so having this time that i've had to myself has been fantastic just to get to know me you know even to have my house exactly how i want it i have to be like well what color do you want this ball you know what i mean i can just do it you're the chooser i'm just i'm the chooser when you imagine your life back together because i'm sure you've seen it how does that look to you we don't know yet i'm not all the way mad at that though i feel like people in her position they're both famous in their own right obviously will smith is i would say will smith is more famous but if you can afford to live apart and that works for y'all, I don't see a big problem. What do you think? Let me get this straight. I remember before it was two separate wings of the house. Now they just got two separate houses. Yeah. I mean, I don't think they like each other. That's what I'm getting at, too. I don't think they want to be around each other at all. It's like a soul tie? It's got to be something. Maybe for the kids, so the kids can see them both at the same time. I just don't like when people make statements like that. And they don't put it out there as like, hey, the other person could be thinking like this, too. Like, oh, I want my space. I want my space. All she had to do was say, and Will probably wants his space, too. Yeah. And that would kind of make it even. And it says move in with her. Yeah. The title did, at least. The title did. But sometimes I feel like when people make statements, which I feel like she has in the past, and other people have in a relationship, it almost puts Will Smith into this. It's like the same thing Ayesha Curry did. Yeah. It almost puts them into, like, damn, does this person have control in their relationship? Or does this other person just control it? Or is it like, outwardly, like, demasculates them and stuff like that? Or is it emasculate or demasculate? Demasculate. I don't know. Hey, Sam, you didn't go, too. I think it's emasculate. It's fine. She's like, come on. We have Spaniel over here. Fixing pesos? Nah, nigga. That is interesting, though. A whole, like, two separate houses. I don't know. I think that's kind of crazy. I feel like it makes sense for them, though. Because their relationship was already kind of weird and just different than the traditional relationship. But that's just a non-traditional way of their living. And they can afford to do that. Yes. And I don't. And also, like, with them, obviously, she's making, like, headlines. I don't know if that's part of their ploy, though. You know what I mean? I could definitely see that. Because having us talk about it, anytime Jada say something about Will, and make the news, the same thing with Aisha and Steph. Maybe they having those conversations. Like, yo, I'm about to say this about you because I'm also selling this book. So I'm about to tell them, you don't be wiping the toilet seat, nigga. You cool with that? Wow. Just room for more entanglements, I feel like. They had that. Exactly. Then they had the open relationship. Yeah. You need separate houses for that. It went from separate wings to separate houses. Wow. Man, some shit. If you're having an open relationship and you can afford it, I would get separate houses. I just would never do an open relationship because it's just like, I really don't fuck with a lot of dudes, right? And then now this person has basically all this access to me. It's like, an open relationship is different from your ex moving on. Because the woman is still actively coming back, getting information from me. Maybe we're still hooking up. And then you're going to pillow talk with the other dudes. You're getting current information from me. And you're giving it to this dude. Now we're supposed to be, cool too? I'm just like, I don't know, man. Somebody got to die. There can only be one. There can only be one of us, my nigga. Hank joined BJ's Wholesale Club the day he became a father of 30. I coach football. Now Coach Hank saves up to 25% off grocery store prices. 30 pounds of pasta, three cases of protein bars, 75 sports drinks. And that's just pregame. He knows teamwork. And BJ's knows savings. This is your home, Coach. Home of the save. Join for just $20 at BJ.com. BJ's.com slash mesquite and save 10 cents per gallon for six months. Open soon. Limited time offer. New members only. BJ's. Home of the save. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hola, como estas? Bien, y tu? Oh, shit. Go ahead, Gene. Talk to her, Gene. De donde eres? CTM. I'm not finished. That was not the right answer. No, okay. I knew she was running out of votes. vocab. As soon as I heard that second sentence. I asked her where she from. She said, good. No, I didn't hear that. Oh, where am I from? I'm from New Jersey, but I live in Greensboro, North Carolina. Okay, okay. You come to the New York show, right? No, I'm going to Charlotte. Oh, you're going to the Charlotte show? Yeah, I'm in North Carolina now, so I'll be at the Charlotte show. Oh, type shit. Raleigh too. See you soon. See, I dropped that after Charlotte and Raleigh would have been better, but I already got my ticket for Charlotte. No, slide to Charlotte, bro. We got something in the store for you. Go to both. What's the strangest thing that you've ever spent your money on? Okay. When I was in high school, I had a boyfriend and he was lacking funds. He wasn't in school, so he was able to work. I was the one in school and he was lacking funds and I paid for his jewelry for my prom and the necklace was quite expensive and that was the strangest or dumbest thing I've ever spent my money on. Ever since then, I've been very stingy when it came to my money and men. Damn, you based your whole life off one interaction. Okay, how much did the necklace cost? That's what men do. Yeah, I mean, you're going to say, oh, I got a flaw, but everybody else got a flaw too. Basically. The money thing is not a flaw, though. Yes, it is. It is a flaw if she's stingy for the rest of her life because of one interaction. No, no, no, no, no, no. That was like 10 years ago, but now, like, in my older years, like, I've spent money on my, like, my boyfriend now, so, you know, money, but it took a long time to get there. Everybody in between, they didn't get anything out of me. No money, no nothing. You just had to find the right one to trick on. Well, how much How much was the necklace? Yeah. It was like Now, we're thinking, like, 2017 high school years. I'm working at Wendy's, so this was a lot back then. It was like $1,500. God damn! That's a lot now. Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on. What, like, how much is a 4 for 4 right now? What is a 4 for 4? It's like a biggie bag now. What do you mean, how much is the 4 for 4? Yeah, oh, shit. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Did they even have? But then again, I think also what was bad is is a brother that gave me graduation money. And I let him flex on the ground with my money. And I also let, like, my graduation dinner to make it look like he paid. I slid him some money so it could look like he paid for us. Oh, the girl was in love in high school. You didn't hold it down? Like, what is he doing now? Do you, have you kept tabs on him? I don't know. You don't even know? Mm. What would be your. No. I'm, like, I don't know. Huh? Like, we, we, we're, like, we're neutral. But I, like, I know of him. Like, I don't keep tabs. Like, oh, my God, what you're doing today? Like, how's life? No, not those type of tabs. Just, like, what he's doing. Just, like, what he's doing in life. Like, how's his life going? It seems like it's going good. Okay. Maybe he needs a little money for a little startup. The dumbest shit I've ever done. But a $1,500 necklace, he's still got to have that somewhere. Like, that's just not something you. That's not a cheap necklace. Yeah, it's not something you lose over the years. I'm not going to lie. He probably pawned it. Because life was rough. So he probably pawned it. But after that, like, literally, 4th of July, he broke up with me, so. Damn. Oh, damn. Real fireworks. Uh, what, uh. No, literally. May, June, July. What, um. What's the most expensive thing you bought your current boyfriend? We've been together. Well, we just broke up. But we've been together. We've been together for. Like, a little minute. So I don't. It's, like, things over the course of the time we were dating. Why y'all break up? So it's not, like, once. Huh? Why y'all break up? Why or when? Why? Then when? We listen to y'all together, so he'll be listening to this. I mean, it's too late. You already, uh. Talking about another nigga. Y'all already. Y'all already done pissed him off, so. Y'all might get back together. Yeah, no, no. Yeah, no, definitely. We might. Like, we definitely might. So it's not. It's just really not no. It's no, like. Y'all come to the live show together. We'll get y'all back together. Hell no. I'm gonna make it worse. I'm going to the live show. I'm gonna make y'all. I'll be at the live show. Hey, whoever her boyfriend is, come to the live show, too. I'm gonna make y'all switch phones at the live show. Oh, I mean, that's fine. Like, we can do that. That's what the problem is right there. I knew it. I knew it. It's something in his phone. No, it's nothing in his phone. No, y'all, seriously, pull up to, y'all should pull up to the live show. We can talk about this on stage. I got my ticket. Okay, hey, hey, look. She tied a pamphlet, nigga. She said, I got my shit. I'm done because I'm on him. Come to the live show. Come to the live show, brody. No, it's on a Wednesday. Okay, what does that mean? She got her ticket. Everybody can't make it. He lives, like, towards the Raleigh area. - He don't know what he can make and what he don't. Hey, bro, come to the show. we're putting her next to another nigga. We'll give you a free ticket to the show if he comes to the show. Tell him to come to the show. We'll give you a free ticket, bro. Not you, but the guy. Are y'all sure? Because I'll let him know right now. Yeah, tell him. But y'all have to come. Y'all want to come together, though. And we're going to pick on y'all, so just let y'all know. How he going to get his free ticket, then? He just got to DM us. It'll be at Will's car. Or we could just like. We control the venue. What I'm saying is because I heard what Mike said. Y'all not going to pick on us? Not pick on you, but we just want to dissect y'all's situation. Consult. For content. I'll see what I'll allow y'all to dissect. You can literally tell us. We can be like, yo, where you at? And then you raise your hand and be like, yo, how your day going? And then you can just be like, no, I'm not fucking with y'all. We just be like, alright, we move on. That's just the risk we taking right now. But best believe, if y'all don't say nothing, we kicking both of y'all. You're not kicking me out. I paid for my ticket. Whatever. Security. Alright, you have a good one. Hi. Happy International Women's Century Decade Day. Thank you. She said thank you. Thank you so much. You're welcome. Has anybody told you that lately? No, actually. Okay. I'm glad you got it from us. Yeah, me too. Alright. What's the strangest thing you've ever spent money on? I paid an Etsy witch to do witchcraft on my ex. They have witches on Etsy? Yeah, they have everything on Etsy. So was it like making like a voodoo doll? No, I don't know what she did. I just paid her to do what she does. I don't know. On your eggs? You didn't even check. You didn't even check in to like what she was actually doing? No, I didn't care. What did you ask her to do? Just to ruin his life. I feel like he ruined mine. Did it work? It was his turn. I think it did, actually. What happened in his life? I think it worked. Well, he played basketball. Like D1 basketball. He kept having to transfer. He was on the bench. He went broke. He even called me one day and asked me for money. So I'm like, oh, this has got to be working, bro. This nigga's life is in shambles. And I'm watching it unfold. So it had to be working. What did he do to you? He just was not a good person. And he cheated on me a whole bunch of times. I guess maybe it was my fault. Why did you say that? Because I kept taking it back after he cheated. What was the final straw? I went to see him one time. And there was another girl at his lock screen. And yeah, that was it for me. That was his lock screen? Oh, my God. He didn't even care about you enough to change his lock screen. Exactly. That's what I'm saying. He went to the bathroom, left his phone. Maybe he did it on purpose. He went to the bathroom, left his phone, sat on his bed. I clicked it. And it was another girl. On purpose? For sure on purpose. You could have done it. They made it easy now. You could do a little, little swiping thing now. Yeah, you can change it. He could have changed it. Yeah, so it was on purpose. It was on purpose. Oh, that's crazy. So when you went to Etsy to look for the witch, what was your, like, criteria you were looking for? Because obviously you put it into, like, the search bar. Well, I seen it on, I seen people talking about Etsy witches on TikTok. And I just commented, like, which one is the best one? And everybody was sending me the same girl. So I just paid her. Oh, that's crazy. One sent her link to the DM. Yeah, I will. I'm just letting you know, when you open yourself up to witchcraft, you opening it up to be done back to you. I know. So. It's okay. I'm about to see if this shit really works. Are you going to do witchcraft on me? Hey, man. I wonder what the same people that use the witchcraft on each other. Do I cancel out? I don't know. Maybe. Does he know you did this to him? No, he doesn't even know. Okay. Hopefully, he doesn't find out. Okay. What's your last message to him? Because it sounds like you're still not over this. I am over it. I just hope his life keeps failing. That's kind of crazy. Honestly. Like, how old are you? 24. 24. When did this happen? Maybe. It had to be like. It had to be like three or four years ago. Yeah, you gotta let it go. I ain't gonna lie. I can't. Why you can't let it go? You ain't find a new man? No. I do have a boyfriend, but I just feel like when people do me wrong, like, I have to, like. I just can't. Like, I just can't let that slide. Does your boyfriend know about this? No. So, he doesn't even know like there's a threat that if he's not good to you, that this could happen to him? No. Exactly. He doesn't even know. So, let's hope he keeps up the good work because he can be next. You know what? You know what? You're the best. Thanks. You're welcome. I don't know what these two other think about you, but I think you're awesome. Thank you. Are you ducking the smoke now? I think so, too. Ducking the smoke. I really like her. Like, I just feel like we just vibe and we'd be best friends. I feel like she's always gonna look out for me. Yeah, I will. I'll do witchcraft on somebody for y'all. I appreciate it. All right. You're welcome. Okay, there's this DJ in Cleveland that. Nigga didn't let me in, man. All right, you have a good one. I got you. Oh, shit. Thank you, y'all, too. Yo. Yo, yo, yo. What's going on with y'all? What up, what up? Sound like he in a Transformer. I was about to say, what's up, Optimus Prime? Y'all real as shit. You a truck driver? Hell yeah. Oh, yeah. You on that roll. You a long-distance truck driver or short-distance? I run the whole East Coast. You feel me? East Coast, East Coast. You married? Hell nah. Okay, good shit, good shit. You know better, huh? In a relationship? Nah, my bitch just left me yesterday, nigga. Oh, damn. Let's see why. All right, come on. I got a question for you. What was your worst purchase that you ever made? All right, so look, I was in high school in a nigga downtown in Baltimore. He had all, like, the fake Louis, fake Gucci shit. Uh-huh. And the nigga had the Louis V condom. Niggas ain't never had that. You feel me? Did you use it? Yeah, nigga, but I used it on the wrong joint, though. You feel me? What do you mean? Like, raw is law. Don't get it twisted, right? Yeah. So I go raw on all the bad joints, but it was just one sketchy joint, and I was like, damn, I only got one rubber. That joint was $70. You feel me? What did the condom, because I'm sure the packaging was Louis V. Like, what did the actual condom look like? It was just a regular rubber. It ain't had a monogram on it? Nah, hell no, but the package had the monogram. So, like, you know what I mean? You know, nigga, high school, you know what I mean? Bitch was like, you got a rubber? I was like, yeah, and I pulled out that Louis V joint, and I was like, don't put it on. Throw it back in the wallet. She be like, ooh. And then you have sex raw, this nigga. It's stupid as fuck. Hell yeah, nigga. Raw, raw. So you bought the condom as an accessory. Like, yeah, I could fuck you with the designer. But I'm gonna say that. Yeah, you feel me? As fuck. Like, yes, yes, yes. I feel you. Like, the CIA does a very good job. Like, this is it. What was y'all's answer? I'm a joint nigga. I'm a joint nigga. I bought a fake record deal, man, during COVID. A nigga was rapping, and a nigga hit me in my DMs talking about, man, I got connections. I can get you signed. I was like, oh, shit. This is my big break. Yo, yo, seemed official. He sent me a whole email. He was like, yeah, I can get your shit to Lil Uzi, the Uzi producer. I can get your shit to his DJ, his DJ. Oh, you know what I mean? You got to do a sign with me. But the sign with me, I need $1,200. I was like, $1,200? That's to me. He just cranked. Yeah, I said that, motherfucker. Like, how much music did you have out before that? Like, were you a well-known rapper before that? I mean, I was well-known in the area, but the area wasn't too big. 10 by 10? Yeah. That nigga went triple platinum in the lunch break room. I really fucked with this shit. That nigga ran the cul-de-sac. Everybody's talking about, man, man, play that one shit again, bro. I got y'all, bro. Oh, man. When did you find out it was a scam? After my shit ain't blow up and I ain't hear from that nigga again. I said, that nigga $1,200. I was talking to him back. I was like, yeah, so Lil Uzi DJ gonna play my shit, right? And that nigga ain't never hit my shit back. tell me this tape ain't fall out your pocket skinny um yeah type shit type shit uh where the song at i mean everywhere all my all my shit still on apple music still on uh youtube and shit what's the song that you thought that little uzi was gonna hop on or or play oh my shit is called nasty bitch nasty bitch by who by me fbe messy fbe messy messy yeah like m-e-s-s-y or s-s-i no like like the saga player okay that's tough i'll fuck with that hold on let me see not nasty bitch we can work on but i'll fuck with the messy shit wait what's it called filthy party you got some interesting uh song upset that's not on youtube what you don't see nasty bitch on there hold on nah bro it's it's way far down the algorithm we're scrolling though yeah you got black we're about to get to it i see i see it i see it most girls we've been to that motherfucker hold on you see my shit right past the messy highlights yeah she nasty nasty nasty yeah she nasty and a bitch but i fuck with her because she can suck a dick hold on because she a nasty bitch oh yeah she nasty nasty nasty nasty and a bitch and she a juggernaut and i ain't got no problem with it i'm with all the rest of shit let me call back let me call back no i'm not gonna lie hold on hold on hey i was like damn you nigga not at home no no no we have to listen to the song hey man that the song not bad i'm not gonna lie like with the right with the right audience and stuff with the right music video like i can see that being like a tiktok trend or something like that if that get to the right djs you know what i'm saying like if uzi heard that yeah if uzi heard it nigga we'd have been out of his shoulder rolling on bro i'm not gonna lie bro if you send us 1200 right now we we got you we'll play you we'll play you get ready oh man oh definitely gonna hear this one though that was funny hank joined bj's wholesale club the day he became a father of 30 i coach football now coach hank saves up to 25 off grocery store prices 30 pounds a day pounds of pasta three cases of protein bars 75 sports drinks and that's just pre-game he knows teamwork and bj's knows savings this is your home coach home of the save join for just 20 dollars at bjs.com slash mesquite and save 10 cents per gallon for six months open soon limited time offer new members only bj's home of the save what's up with y'all what's up with you what are you got your camera on yeah i'm on the way i was just i was just listening to y'all when i went to sleep i took a nap and i was in like the date night one oh the dating show yeah y'all like the date show like the three fat guys and y'all like bullying like a little mexican dude i don't know what podcast you watching dummies podcast no that was some tubi shit you was watching yeah he had a dream about i got a question for you what's the strangest thing you spent money on all right so i answered the question i was with my girl but it was like y'all know what spencer's is oh yeah yeah yeah to be in the mall yeah so like yeah like you go to the mall you go to spencer's they got all like the freaky stuff in there right so like me and her we went to spencer's and she was like trying to get me to buy this shirt because she was buying like a a rose toy so i was like all right cool so then i go in the back and there's like all like these like these like i don't even know what you want to call them like dildos and stuff like that all the freaky stuff and then she saw it it's like harry potter button and she was like i'm gonna get a butt plug she wanted me to buy and she was like do you want it and i was like you can buy it from if you want me to so now i got a voldemort butt plug sit in my room for hello for who like like just like just just so like just for it like it's not for anybody i'm not going to use it like decoration is yours i guess yeah like it's just sitting there like it's just like i'm just saying does she use butt plugs not to my knowledge so you bought a butt plug and it's at your place yeah well no she bought it for me but i'm not i don't use it hello you don't find it weird that she bought you a butt plug no like she'd be doing that stuff all the time like she'd just be like joking on me and stuff name some other jokes joking until you agree to do it i mean like i'm not i'm not too surprised like she'd be doing stuff like that all the time let's hear it let's hear it like what's some other ones like some other weird stuff she's done uh i mean she like has like some handcuffs like some glittery handcuffs like that type of stuff okay i mean there's like we got handcuffs butt plug what else have you guys used the handcuffs have we yeah we use the one okay so that's one item you use okay you just got this butt plug yeah she gotta joke about it a little bit more let's say be like i'm down no you're gonna be naked one day and she's gonna push you on the couch my friend my friend he was just saying that no that's it now he's gonna be riding that you know how they ride broomsticks he's gonna be riding it the other way no what what no no no no what other gifts they gave you hey no she gave me whatever she gave me yeah oh i mean that's like that's kind of like the normal like not normal but like that's like i thought other people do that stuff though like i'm not the only one you know what i mean you're the only person i've ever heard of this girlfriend buying him a butt plug and neither one of you guys use a butt plug but i mean like it's just just for i mean what let me think about something else she's got me like uh oh she did give me a shirt it says i love midget porn on it yeah that's that's another thing she got me something's going down bro we don't know what it is yet bro but she's cooking up something not my friend he was like like one day she was gonna like drug me and then like you know i wouldn't go that far i doubt it though she she that's that's wifey though like we're a little out there yeah you about to be locked in for real yeah i don't know bro yeah she but yeah protect yourself bro i i will i will you know how i get down hey by by what you've told us i really do not i'm a little confused but hey 2026 we not judging we're not judging you bro everybody everybody has their own kinks yeah that butt plug not there for no reason no no no no no no no no y'all doing a show in atlanta right yeah you coming yeah i'm gonna pull up all right just don't bring the pup butt plug leave that shit i'm gonna pull up all right now he didn't deny it that's your new nickname yeah he goes like y'all sign it no that's crazy i saw my vault my voldemort plug it's crazy no fuck no i would literally i would legit slap the shit out of you all right bro you have a good one man all right wait am i going to podcast we don't know man you just make sure that butt plug stay unused all right you guys i got you i got you hello hello hello hi guys what up what up welcome to crash dummies podcast episode 251 with your host mike pat oh is it 252 oh no one oh so you just corrected me in front of ladies for nothing that's cool uh pat has a question for you actually okay oh is this my question so then you trying to like power trip in front of her too no i'll just i'm just saying you're just being real weird because you weren't having this energy before she got on the phone that's true man i'm just like but it's just like you doing this in front of her for what i'm just saying bro just give me that money you owe me i'm just trying to answer the question whatever y'all got for me no pat actually owed me some money so that's kind of like that 10 bands i told you i got that 10 times over you better pay up you All right. let's get this started so i can hop in my helicopter and leave all right what was your i don't give a fuck moment i'm sorry i guess i can isolate that what was your i don't give a fuck moment um when i posted my ex on the t app um so basically i was just trying to get information like oh who else is messing with this guy because like at the time he wasn't even my man anymore but like i just fucked him so i was like who else is he fucking around with and like my post got blown up and they were like oh like three other girls posted him and so like i went into the other girls comments and i was like oh hey so like i literally just fucked him fyi and she was like oh no like he's my man like you're a bird bitch and i was like i was trying to be a girl's girl no yeah like i was like i'm trying to be a girl's girl and like i'm just letting you know and she's like you're just a bird you just want him back and i'm like he was literally just over here last week what do you mean i guess she's not wrong though no it's not like you i don't like the way you're talking right now you're supposed to be like girl both of us got played that's how you really get under their skin you don't like go back and forth and be like he was just over there he did that like no he's fucking both of us also you're not you guys weren't you guys weren't together at the time right no we had just like hooked back up but like we were like still like talking and i know this guy had things going on with other women too and i was like but y'all weren't exclusive well in my eyes like delusion right oh okay so you admit that you're a little delusional at this point a little but i mean like we kind of talked things out a little bit oh y'all talk things out oh so you let him back in again yeah so yeah i'll admit i was dumb and then it was funny too because like she like texted him off like a fake number and so he called me and like accused me of like texting him and doing all this stuff and i cussed him out and i was like f you that's not even me and i just came in the house and the pot of shit and i had groceries so i was like how the fuck i'm gonna text you i have groceries on my hand i go what the fuck is this about no that's crazy he don't even know who it is that's crazy he got so many what's he posting the t app though like because you might were you lying oh no i wasn't lying i told the truth i was like yo just want to know like i at least said like it was because i didn't want to say like my man because like at least i'll admit i was delusional so i was like let me just say situation because that's what it was okay uh what's your relationship like no um well i don't talk to him that was like last year so not just like overall like oh there's somebody in my life shout out to him though he's a real one i love him down this your boyfriend is it official um no we're not official we're just dating he's really sweet that's where you i mean you gotta learn your lesson from the last time you gotta define it at the beginning all these little no so we we definitely define things but uh definitely like that tf should die down so definitely probably wouldn't post anybody again because i don't get through it's a facebook are you gonna post this dude um probably not so you don't care you just don't want to find out he just that good of a man you don't care what are you doing no not really all right that's fair all right honestly delusional i'll admit it at least i'm not like i'm not gonna beat around the bush i was delusional oh that's fine how old were you when that happened i was 20 i just turned 26 okay pronto low was still developing yeah a little bit well i mean he was pretty stupid and then i was stupid again because i let him back in and then like you hear that our helicopter just got here though um not sure like taking off without me god i thought you wait a minute all right you have a good one you do things that's crazy what's going on what'd he do what'd he do welcome to casting this podcast thank you for having me again have you been on the pod i've been on three times bro oh what'd you like what did you say anything oh i i don't the first one was remember my boy made that we made i made that song with my boy and then i played it for y'all oh yeah yeah he couldn't rap he was trying to chase the beat well i got that with an ak-47 oh i got a question for you uh what's something you want to apologize for well i want to apologize for what you did for me i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry to my boys for calling calling them out on y'all podcast and like saying the music ass because y'all made a clip about it and the shit went viral and he ain't seen it yet but i don't know if you will oh he hasn't seen that i'm just yeah i'm just i'm copping a plea right now like hey big bro i ain't even me and all that i was just trying to be funny for the pod like you feel me no that's crazy no no that's what you mean i'm copping please no that's so crazy you're trying to get an apology on record and the nigga still ain't even take this take this out the clip though like i don't mean it of course but like he he like like i i he my friend i don't want to i don't want him to like know i said that we're definitely so like just say bro don't keep this it won't make it it won't be a clip but we definitely keep it this way yeah that's not good enough to be a clip but like i've if he looks all right good i don't need it to be i don't need it to be a clip but he just gonna listen to this part okay cool all right start start from your plea then so maybe he skipped this part yeah yo burdo i'm sorry for calling your music ass listen i know you just started a few months ago and i've been teaching you so it's basically my fault you asked too so i gotta take that responsibility on my shoulders too so listen we're gonna keep making music keep rocking out and we're gonna go a big one there all right that's how you keep him paying you huh he said what he talked to that nigga like a baby no because that's my little bro like he's 20 i'm 22 that's my little bro that's how you i said that's how you keep him uh to keep paying you huh no bro what you mean are his sessions free money uh i wouldn't say it's free it's transactional like you bring a bottle or you bring some like yeah you could get a you can get a verse oh okay okay okay if he gets you if he gets you loose he get a beat but i'm also the type where like if you pull up to my school you got to play me in 2k okay that nigga like all foreplay before you stay with some jokes bro i got some jokes for you dude you know what i'm saying you know what i'm saying i'm playing i'm playing all right y'all boys i'm about to hit the liquor store about to give me get about to get me some taylor parts so i'll talk to y'all later you gonna rub my feet for you get this well how many tracks you want um okay two tweet in a weeks all right let's do it these are the best deleted tweets on twitter okay the first one is i guess this was when um demar hamlin went down with that crazy injury yeah everybody remember that when was that one demar hamlin the buffalo bills player he had a his heart stopped or something like that right oh yes yeah this is perfect and the reason why you're perfect for this is because what you don't know is what some of our other listeners don't know and i hate when they comment like damn y'all went on a sports talk and just left us out we got y'all we got y'all somebody here okay somebody tweeted said yo scrape that nigga off the field we got a game to play crazy and i remember and you know who else got in trouble that night was skip bayless yeah because he was talking about like playoff implications during that time yeah and i think that was the downfall of skip bayless also the next one is this nigga changed his name to tyler the creator nigga them movies are ass keep it at tyler perry so somebody thought that tyler perry tried to change his name to tyler the creator that would be a dope uh name change though definitely a dope name change if tyler the creator wasn't tyler the creator i was tyler perry i would want that name it's just i'm creating all these shows yeah it's just funny how like fame makes a name regular yeah you know you have to say their whole name yeah that's why you know you made it yeah you can't just call tyler perry tyler like if there was no if there was no if there was no asap crew and i call myself asap pat i don't think it would hit as hard today you know what i'm saying i think it would asap pat yes it just has to sound different it sounds like a stage name any stage name can work yeah what about jock weas no shout out to the queen mix though that should be my shit oh oh man where are any other tweeters weeks uh yeah i must oh okay yeah here we go here we go um it was There was a moment where I think LeBron James checked into the game or, no, LeBron James was already in the game and a player named Jabari Smith, who's a younger player that plays for the Houston Rockets, checked into the game and he didn't have his shirt tucked in. And LeBron James was complaining to the ref like, yo, that's a delay game. He ain't got a shirt tucked in. And he turned to Jabari Smith, come into the game with your shirt tucked in on national, without your shirt tucked in on national TV? That's how we doing it? And the first comment was just like, just tucked my beater into my drawers. Glazing. Why LeBron snitching out here? Now, that's a good tactic, though. Did somebody say, I hate the fact that Brian even had to speak? Okay. Somebody had an obituary. Rest in peace, whoever this is. But the obituary. The obituary is crazy. One at the top, it says, I'm not rich, in quotes. I think that was like the favorite, the person's favorite quote, I'm not rich. And it says, but I got a lot of love to give. And on the obituary, there's three pictures of the person smoking. And over each picture, it says, puff, puff, pass. And it's the person passing the blunt is like the last one. Oh, damn. It's creative. It is. I would say that. Puff, puff, pass. I'll fuck with it. And it says, remember me always. I feel it, though. I feel like if that was their character when they were alive. If that's what they wanted to be remembered as, then cool. But if they were like secretly doing this stuff, and now you find out for the first time that they out here chiefing on, you know, like, wow. Nah, you shouldn't improvise a funeral. I'm always like, I'm always like, I don't know with like funerals. Because like, to me. Like, y'all should be doing your job to like, make sure I get to like, the great afterlife. Like, do all my shit. Whatever they say in the books, do. Yeah. Do that shit. Yeah. Don't hold no roast at my fucking funeral tomorrow. This is what Pat would have wanted. No, nigga. I don't like jokes like that. Now, you'll be mad if somebody puts song lyrics on your obituary. Hell, yeah. I want my shit to be serious. Like, I want niggas to feel like they fucking hurt about the. I won't. Like, if I go. It's for Mike and like, I'm like 78 or some shit like that. Like, I want this nigga to die directly after. No, bro, I think after we're like 50, we probably won't be friends anymore. No, no, no. I'm good. I can't take that type of heartbreak. I don't even fuck with old people. Like, we did have a contract on like our friendship after 50. Like, what else is there? We made it. That's a really good friendship. Not be friends. Yeah. We go about our own lives. I probably moved to another country. I probably started a radio station in Atlanta and be dissing this nigga subliminally every once in a while. I'm glad I left that nigga. Welcome back to WB 1027. That's crazy. A plan is a plan. We can't do this podcast and shit forever. If y'all niggas think I'm gonna be in like my upper 40s doing a podcast, y'all are crazy. No offense to anybody that's doing it. No, I probably still be podcasting. That's half of the podcast community. Yeah, that is half of the podcast community. No, no, no. I'm saying like me personally. Because you started in your 20s? Yes. I'm saying like, I don't want to be doing this shit for 20 years. If I'm still like- I feel like we'll still be doing something, but it'll be something different. It might still be a podcast. It might evolve. It might evolve. Maybe it's a TV show. Yeah. It gotta be something. The host of Family Feud. Yeah. I'd do that. 15 years. Those hosting jobs, man. Once you in, bro, you can be in for life. Nick Cannon. That's what you pop about. He got money for a date. He need to move over. He keep hosting every fucking thing. Steve Harvey, a set. You're a set for life. I want to do the Wheel of Fortune. Nevertheless. You know how many people are in front of you for Wheel of Fortune? I feel like with those type of late night shows, it's like they have the set people already. Yeah, it's a lineage. Because people can do those late night shows. You can do those for 20 years, 40 years. Yeah. They already got the next one. Trevor Noah might already be in line. Or some shit. It's going to be the same circle of people. It's going to be hard for somebody really to break in that's young. Y'all made me think of, do you remember the show Whose Line Is It Anyway? It used to be my favorite show. That show, if it was brought back. What was the concept again of the show? Was it like they say a line and you have to guess where the reference is from? No, it was more like improv. They give you a situation like, Mike, your car just broke down and Gene, your incompetent mechanic. Got it. Got it. Okay. And then the thing that would throw it off is just like, they'll throw me in and just be like, oh, you're just a passerby who's too nosy. So we'd have to guess his role or like, it's a different game. Yeah. I remember the title of the show, but it's like, I really faintly remember. Wayne Brady. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Oh, yeah. Okay. Yeah. That was Wayne Brady. Okay. I do remember this show. Yeah. Oh, because they were like, somebody would run up down on stage from where their seat, right? Yeah. To perform it. There would be like two people on the side and then you had the host. I forgot his name. He was like the judge. Drew Carey, yeah. He was the judge. He's the host of- Are we aging ourselves like crazy? He's the host of one of the game shows now. Price is Right. Price is Right. Oh, okay. Is he really? Yeah. I haven't seen him. They don't connect. Nah, this is a real auntie conversation. Y'all want liberty. I mean, that's how the box over there- But that's why we teaching these little niggas something. No, some of these people are our age, so a lot of them are our age. So they know it. Like, oh, I ain't thought about that in a minute. Yeah. Okay, so I felt bad. I felt really shallow. I was at the mall and I was shoe shopping for someone. Because I've always been a very adjustable, adaptable person. Especially when it comes with women, I always say there's really not a feature that I would look at a woman immediately and be like, oh, no. If I like the woman's personality and I think she's beautiful, there's no attribute or physical thing that could just- Just throw me off. Really? Until I was shopping and I tried to get a shoe in my size that I liked. And I was like, oh, it should be some fours. You know when you catch like a Jordan 4 at like a Foot Locker or some shit? This shoe not supposed to be here. Like, let me cop it. And the dude was like, I was like, he's like, what size you are? I was like, 11. And he was like, oh, man, if she don't buy that 11, we'll give it to you. So I like turned around like, oh, she must be buying this for a dude. Like, she definitely buying it. And she had that motherfucker on her foot. What size are they? 11. Men's 11. Was she super tall, though? No. But that's the thing. No, but the thing is, it's like, because I thought like a woman who has like a big as a foot as mine wouldn't matter. Yeah. Because usually- That comes with height. Yeah. And I would be okay being in a relationship with someone who's 6'4". Like, who cares? Like, if that's my person, that's my person. But someone who's 5'9", that wears an 11, ain't nothing I can do with that. I'm sorry. You ain't about to be slipping my shoes off. 5'9 is still kind of tall, though. No, I'm not about to be looking for my shoes. She already got the hoodies. She got the hoodies. She got the big t-shirts. And now she got the shoes. Babe, you got turned into you. Babe, you got on the fives? I'm just throwing the fours. Go ahead. Go ahead. Like, what? Like, me and my girl got every shoe, bro. It's perfect. Now, that shit would be so annoying. Same size shoe is a little critical. No, because like- But what about the people that are, they're pretty short as well? And the girlfriend is short. I've seen that situation before. Yeah, I've seen them. We literally know like a couple that used to be married that had the same shoe size. But usually it's like a difference, though. Yeah. You're just the feet not looking as goofy, I guess. I think of my girlfriend now. We got a lot of feet. We got a similar style. And like, if we had the same shoe size, she probably would definitely wear my shoes. Yeah. And I wouldn't want that shit. Yeah. Like, and I wouldn't want somebody looking down at like, you know what I mean? Like, I think every dude looking at my girl feet. Shoes is where it stops. You don't care if it's like a double XL shirt she wears. Because now they might be questioning where you got your shoes from. Like, you wearing your girl's shoes? Right. Now you got a question where she got her shoes from. Like, come on now, baby. The brand one. You think I'm stupid? What nigga had those? She got you asking insecure ass questions. So what size shoe was your ex? What'd you say? Oh, he was 11 like me? So if your girl came with the same size hoodie, like from another, not another relationship, just in general, she had it in her closet. It was already an XL hoodie. You wouldn't feel a way about it being an XL hoodie? It fits. It got to be designer or something. Like something like that. I can't replace. If I can't, but in XL though, if it's not her size, like your size, like, you know, it's from another man. Yeah. That shit. Nice. You gonna throw it on? If it's a Balenciaga hoodie and it's a fucking 2X and I know she got it from another dude, you know what I'm saying? I'm rocking that shit. And I might tag that nigga. Hey bro, you got hella taste, bro. But I'm never going, I'm never going out in it. I feel like that's kind of like, oh, you got my going outfit. Like, no nigga, I'm about to hoop in your Balenciaga hoodie. yo we are taking a quick break from the podcast hey don't don't times to us this is our own ad this is for tour slow that shit down we are live in chicago march 26 tickets are are moving quickly new york is super low uh atlanta nashville april 7th and 8th nashville uh then we got the 15 we got baltimore philly um boston new york charlotte raleigh uh we gotta emphasize raleigh a lot yes raleigh y'all pop out i know some of y'all like live in raleigh y'all bought show i mean our tickets to the charlotte show we apologize but if you're in raleigh make sure you pop out the charlotte tickets are halfway gone just to give y'all a heads up so it's moving pretty fast that show is moving we're also doing one in raleigh again next day so come on new dates we got cleveland may 28th we got toronto toronto toronto may 30th and we got detroit may 31st homecoming yeah make sure you guys get your tickets don't wait to get your tickets please just get them as soon as you can and yeah i don't know what else we got to tell y'all man hey get your tickets no complaining if you buy a ticket tag us on ig facebook twitter whatever we'll repost it because obviously we appreciate it and again crash dummies live.com there's people going to like some fake websites to get the tickets it was like three hundred fifty dollars don't buy no resale tickets no like if you're gonna get somebody three hundred fifty dollars give it to me personally i'll make sure you get into the venue don't even worry about nothing just go to crash dummies live.com to get the tickets all right y'all back to the show all right this is a listener from dublin ireland who sent us a email to wish her boyfriend des or des a happy birthday it says me and my boyfriend are from dublin ireland and my boyfriend listens to every episode of yours every wednesday and i mean every episode holy shit he recently got me to listen to and told me how much it meant to him when he worked graveyard shifts his birthday is coming up now on saturday and i was hoping if there's any chance you guys could give him a birthday shout out on the next episode his name is des he's turning 22 and would mean the world to him i'm already hoping to surprise him with videos from all his friends and the patreon subscription so she buying you the patreon subscription but a shout out from you guys would be the cherry on top cheers listeners from dublin what you got to say no we're not doing it bro no we good bro okay we can't no birthday shout outs no no because we start with you then we gotta read everybody's shit and everybody's sending their birthday what about me what about now we're just playing happy birthday man he's probably cut it off by now at least i can't take no happy birthday bro niggas playing you and love you guys that's crazy hey let us know if it's more uh listeners in dublin ireland that way uh you know we might do a show out there yeah we're gonna do a show in london so we're just gonna sit in gene and just gonna be two holograms of us now appearing the crash dubby animatronics oh there was a video from two bears one cave cave with birch chrysler whoa two bears one cave with birch uh chrysler and uh yeah but the question was they were talking about last meal in jail and stuff like that in prison so what would be your death row meal my death row meal would be uh boiled eggs um baked beans pinto beans kidney beans sardines whole milk uh laxatives you're trying to make a mess in there when y'all come to me y'all gonna smell this shit i promise you because i know i'm a shit on myself yeah and i want it to be the nastiest shit ever like y'all gonna have to clean up hella shit and i hope i got the little the jogging suit on so it'll spill out like leakage no you gotta like wear like rubber boots or something and tie the edge just tie your edge of your feet tie the edge of your feet so you're just a big bubble of shit no real shit bro uh i probably do uh sunflower seeds i'm just gonna eat it one by one i just want to waste time i literally just eat it one by one like y'all i get a last meal because is there a time limit to the last meal or how long it takes i think there is a time you got barbecued like nigga you about to be the sunflower start turning to popcorn and shit nah just uh nigga put some uh popcorn seeds in his mouth before you get on the thing oh that'd be that'd be funny that'd be funny that'd be funny gee watch your nigga die i don't think they use electric chair like that no more nah they do lethal injection yeah that's what i'm saying you know with the lethal injection like the lethal injection people don't know something this in some states but they don't know who like gave the the the poison base basically the thing that killed them there's full doctors yeah yeah just for their conscience for doctors yeah like full like fake oh yeah so if you had to choose no it was just for if you had to choose what would you want how would you want to go out uh gunshot through the lethal injection a firing squad just so i can see like there's people that are actively killing me that way i can like even that sometimes they lash out you know at the end like yo but like lethal injection is more like they got you like in a room it's a two a one-way mirror one-way mirror you can't see shit you don't know who outside it's your high school bully out there he playing uno behind the thing like yeah he's killing his nigga but it's just like you don't know what's there and it seems like more sad the electric chair seems like okay you strapping me and shit like that it's just like no firing squad the gas chamber like all that stuff will be like not good everything else is like too like claustrophobic yeah you want the quickest thing quickest thing you know what i'm saying or some like shit like yeah i want to go out like cleo like a gangster bro when i tell you that as black people we have some sad ass endings to like some movies like set it off sad ass ending hardball sad ass ending and i forgot michael b jordan was even there hardball man shout out to michael b jordan though oh yeah man i had an oscar question actually um if you don't show up for an award do you think you should win that award yeah you don't think so no not something like an oscar yeah if it's like something small then okay i think this i think it's the opposite though oscar you definitely like you had to earn that shit but like if we doing like you know best radio station in atlanta and then y'all not here y'all not the best radio station in atlanta when sean penn sean penn didn't show up but i guess he was in some other country talking uh and because i kind of wanted delroy to win from for his uh his part in uh sinners yeah uh but sean penn did play a really good character as well like and people were kind of mad about it because um in his character uh what's the movie called again one battle after another he basically was his his reputation in the movie was was bad like it was like a lot of essay stuff going on but i think when an actor can make you feel away whether it's angry happy sad that's like really good acting to me and if he makes you feel a certain way and i feel like he had a bigger part in in his show than uh delroy did it's a lot of people don't fuck with the the dude who is on uh who's in the wheelchair um he got a brother uh harris his brother famous too he was in a wheelchair on uh one of tyler perry movies and he used to abuse the girl oh boy the evil guy evil guy like yeah i don't fuck with him i don't fuck with pinky from friday you know i'm saying like i'm just thinking like character but that's like good acting though i feel like if you make somebody hate you like and you can see past like the character they're playing look up look up evil dave chapelle michael ely what what movie was he uh the bad guy in the um four color girls oh yeah but i've seen him in good roles too though yeah so like michael ely michael ely was like the heartthrob like i don't think he was talking about a movie i don't fuck with this nigga evil dave chapelle is funny bro no that dude that dude make me mad so buddy from one battle after another wasn't there so no he wasn't there see if i lost and i see that the winner yeah exactly i'm pissed i'm a little salty i'm a little salty and he's like his character like his the way people describe him is like he kind of has like that nonchalant like energy like it's like like he can be out fishing the way same way like jokic uh they say he don't like playing the nba he likes his horses more than the nba it's kind of that feeling okay no i get that but shout out to michael b jordan too for winning um yeah and ryan coogler they're trying to tear ryan coogler down yeah why what do you do they just i think anytime someone wins something every um i want to call them all minorities but every every uh group of people that have been oppressed they go look at if that person was an advocate for them before they like give them their flowers and stuff like that and i think a lot of people are like trying to do that and it's like sometimes people don't make statements i didn't know the the theme was to go to in and out and take a you know take a picture with the oscar yeah because i went michael b jordan though i was judging him a little bit i was like bro i know he don't like in and out that much but then but then when i found out it was like that's the thing to do that was like okay that makes sense i found that out too yeah i was like all right you can tell that nigga ain't been a burger in like five years that nigga bit that bitch and he wiped his whole mouth but y'all don't see y'all like them i've been killing niggas for years with have you had have you have you had in and out i have yeah it's very oh don't do that you we said we went this no restaurants and now you about the disc in and out you you ready to go down the path yes he was you think i was about to diss it yes right in and out it felt like you know he was right in and out one and ten one to ten yeah okay it's not the worst burger i've ever had okay i'm saying the whole experience because you had they fries too i'll give you style yeah it was an animal style oh nah i'm freaking gina wait wait i thought i think it's i think it's animals i think it's animals definitely animal right i don't even know once all right that nigga going to the wrong in and out that nigga's really going in and out oh oh fuck that shit i want an ass in and out the nigga said i want to get the nigga said i want to get an ass in and out the nigga said i want to get an ass in and out the nigga said i want to get an ass in and out the nigga said i'm going to in and out the nigga said i'm going to in and out hold the out what nasty style is crazy the nigga go in and out and say can i get the fries nasty style he's like i gotta go to the back room with your shit real quick nigga got a shirt on that say fries what the fuck is he talking about in and out ranch that's exactly the nasty style they're gonna put on that shit too nigga this is our glazed burger no that's too crazy oh man all right that's been uh the crash dummies podcast uh carrie appreciate you being on the podcast they've been loving you shout everything you got again of course wait can i ask y'all a question go ahead so my fiance is on a bachelor's trip right now oh how uh how do men be acting on bachelor's trips have y'all ever been they fucking i'm glad i don't even only my we cool bro um where he going they went to cancun they fucking do you know the uh do you know all the all the grooms it was like 11 of them and he's the best man so oh he's the best man oh it's not for him he is the best man for the bachelor trip back to our previous statement okay okay okay okay that's like very like you know what i think i think uh as uh somebody who's not you know getting married he's there just to have a good time he's probably influencing you know the actual no no no you know he definitely he's definitely a big influence because when i was best man i like control like the activities and stuff like that so like what kind of activity person is he is he more of like an experienced person so i know where they went so they did um they had some clubs obviously really big sections i do have the love um they also did like a big boat party situation somewhere and really was just a lot of clubs and stuff at the in the airbnb all right out of the 11 people how many of the 11 are single men maybe only a couple a couple okay is it more is it because it's 10 i think it's more people in relationships okay okay that's always a good sign yeah like too many when it's like i don't know about like fiancee yeah yeah type situation because people don't take boyfriend girl what what you know what resort they're saying that exactly no oh okay there is an adults only resort in cancun oh and it's called uh temptation cancun the playground for grown-ups caters to 21 and over adults offering a vibrant and passion-infused topless optional environment i'm just gonna hope that they just out there playing poker no you're good no no no we know because when we don't we we influence in the comments right now yeah yeah don't do that don't do that he good though i think i met him he seemed like come on but it depends it does depend who's leading it yeah because i feel like with uh if i had a bachelor party i would want it more like activity based as well like we probably gonna play like a tournament of something yeah like paintball soccer soccer go-karts something something something competitive contest you know i wouldn't do all that we'll probably we'll probably go right now if we're in cancun we probably do go to a couple clubs yeah yeah i feel like everybody's different like with bachelorette parties i feel like people they could be different too because they've had they might have those like super horny uh made of honors and they have those uh the dancy teddy bears uh come in and they putting the sheets on yeah yeah and they sucking dick behind the sheets the sheet is literally see-through like we can see i feel like they don't get strippers anymore like bachelor parties and no i think i honestly i do think people that are getting married are a little bit more mature these days yes i feel like there's too many cameras and yeah like their internet and like vlogging yeah like having like strippers at your your bachelor party i feel like a little if that's y'all thing like if you and your partner are okay with that then that's y'all thing but if like you put in like other people in uncomfortable situations yeah i'm not into like hired women like that's that shit will always throw me off like i can't hire someone to hang around me because like now everything you say is disingenuous like no like my shirt can't be that fucking nice i was hands off me i was at a party one time and this is like where i was like okay this is a weird occupation there was a woman on the table um and she they had like the the finger food on her oh whoa whoa okay i've seen that yeah like she was covered in like she was like she was pretty much naked but like her privates are covered by like the the food and you can like pick the like a finger food like crackers or like dip caviar off her off of her and you can kind of like dip your chips in as well it felt very soulless like it was just like how do you even get into like this occupation that's how i know i'm good like i've never been that freaky my biggest concern is like damn did she wash up today like her fucking ribs like one of those like super fancy parties it's just like man money would make a lot of people just do like very weird shit but it is it is that middle ground though like i feel like i'm in that middle ground i for some reason i like don't enjoy guys night like i enjoy guys night at like maybe like a cap of four but if you add that fifth dude like this shit like yeah i don't like rolling it's like it's like a meat factory in this bitch like it's like not even like i need women around but i just like it to be like different conversations when there's too many dudes a conversation kind of just goes down like this this path eventually and then eventually you're playing mary fuck keel with if i'm at a club too like even as i go out like say if i'm at a bachelor party i don't also don't want to be at a club that is all dudes at yeah like there has to be girls there yes not because i want to do anything with the girls but it's just like it's a different vibe when there's women around and they're having fun it's just like a different energy less tension yeah it's just more it's just like a way feminine energy yeah that's fine and people watching too like i want to see some interactions like i want to see this nigga get dissed for the fifth time tonight i already knew it this nigga stink like they gotta smell the shit just like i do remember summer's coming up if you can smell yourself a little we can smell you a little bit more if you can smell yourself a little we can smell you a little bit more we can smell you a lot now we gotta insert deodorant out there we really need a deodorant and make sure like listen uh indiana shout out to indiana nobody was musty shout out to st louis only two of y'all was musty and they know who they is because they're brothers now you're a little around you but i know what y'all was doing i think it was some weed or anything you got coming up uh carrie yeah uh brewer season make sure you guys catch me at the brewers games hosted by me and i'll see y'all in the next one bye and just make sure you listen to my podcast daily brain squeeze find it anywhere you listen to podcasts and follow me on instagram at carrie noni underscore check out noni juice hey yeah the merch is going out y'all yeah merch is i'm trying to create some new designs so dm me some ideas i might have from merch y'all not getting no credit nothing like that maybe like a free shirt of that design asking for 10 is gonna get you blocked man thanks for the idea also follow my tiktok not pat 777 it's supposed to be a burner account but it is what it is i don't got shit going on right now but all right y'all put this box and highlight up hank joined Join BJ's Wholesale Club the day he became a father of 30. 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