Want To Change Your Life? Stop Lying

You're listening to "Loaner to Leader," your path to power, passion, and prosperity. Hosted by Eric Mortimer, transformation coach, husband, grandfather, and author of the book, growing a business without sacrificing balance. Are you a man seeking more money, more connection, and to more deeply understand your purpose? Problem is that not all men have the support system necessary to live life with the values, direction, and energy that they desire. This podcast helps you act with integrity, moving in the direction you want, lowering your emotional baggage so you can lead with confidence and certainty, mastering the game. It's your turn. If this sounds like you, this is your podcast. Here's your host, Eric Mortimer. Almost everybody says they want to change their life. New goals, new plans, new promises, same results. And that's being honest about how that actually feels. You're tired, frustrated, stuck repeating the same damn cycle. You wake up with pressure on your chest, not because you don't know better, but because something's off and you know it. The only thing standing between you and freedom is one brutal truth. You're lying. Not just to your wife, not to your co-workers, your employees, not to the people watching you online. You're lying to yourself, and the worst part, you probably believe it. You say things like, "I'm doing my best. I know what I need to do. I'm just in a season. That's not truth. That's a story. And stories are great until you try to live in them. People love that phrase. The truth will set you free. Sounds deep. Looks great on Instagram. Perfect on a coffee mug next to your laptop. You're pretending to work on it. But the part nobody tells you. Truth doesn't set you free. Just do. Because most men don't tell the facts. They tell a filtered version, a socially acceptable version, a version that protects their ego and lets them sleep at night. Which is impressive, because insomnia usually shows up later. And we live in a world that rewards lying. Social media filters, angles, fake certainty. Everybody's winning. Nobody's honest. You ever notice how everyone online is crushing it, but somehow nobody you know actually is. Government narratives instead of numbers, feelings instead of facts. And after a while, men start doing the same thing with their own lives. So today we're not doing motivation. We're not doing my truth in air quotes. We're doing facts. Because facts don't care how you feel. Just don't argue and facts always leave fruit. If you want your life to change, stop lying. Tell the facts. And we'll talk about those facts and what they're actually producing. No, here's the real problem. Most men don't lie maliciously. They lie practically. They lie just enough to keep functioning, just enough to keep the lights on, just enough to avoid real confrontation. You're running your life like a car on empty. Duck taping warning lights, flooring the gas with adrenaline, hoping the engine does install today. It's not a big lie. It's a very responsible one. Here's a lie. No, you don't. Because if you actually knew you'd be doing it, I've had people say that to me all the time that they want to have coaching from me, and they try telling me exactly how they want to be coached and what they need and said, well, if you're actually coachable, you may want to consider that you don't actually know what to do, or you would already have the results that you want it. So let's be precise here. You don't know what to do. You chose comfort over change every single time. That's not confusion. That's a decision. Here's another big lie. I'm doing my best. That one sounds noble. It's great for kids. I tried my hardest. I did my best. It's responsible. It's almost heroic, but I'm doing my best usually means I'm doing what I'm willing to do. Best effort is measurable. Excuses are flexible. If this was your best, we wouldn't still be here. Number three, here's another big one. This is just a season. No, a season has an end date. A pattern doesn't. If you've been saying that for years, it's not a season. It's a lifestyle. A leaf feels better than facts, facts demand action. A leaf asks for agreement, facts demand responsibility. So where does this show up in your real life? Inside your money. Inside your business, you say things like, you know, the market's weird. I just need one more break. Or once things stabilize, once we're through the holidays, the fact is you're avoiding the hard decision. You already know needs to be made. You're not broke. You're capped. You don't hit ceilings by accident. You build them. Inside your marriage or your relationships, you say, we're fine, we're fine. She knows I love her. And now it's not the time, but the fruit says, distance, engine, low polarity. You shall know them by their fruits and you don't lose attraction overnight. You lost it, one avoided conversation out of time. East without truth is just silence with a countdown. Inside your health, you say things like, you know, I'm not that bad. I used to be in shape. I'll dial in and later I'll start Monday. Later is the most disciplined lie, men tell. Your body never lies. It just keeps receipts. Inside your spirituality, inside your purpose and your identity, you say things like, I should be grateful. This is just life. I've already done a lot. And then gratitude becomes alive the moment you use it to excuse stagnation. So why am I talking about this? What's the big deal? Everybody's doing it. Well, here's the cost of lying. You stop trusting yourself. When a man doesn't trust himself, nothing works. Fast forward five years, same lies, same stories, same money, worse body, colder marriage, louder regret. In the scariest party, you call it normal. No, there's different kinds of lies. Most men here lying in the picture, some cartoon villain twirling his mustache. Whoa, that's not how this works. If it were obvious, you'd stop. So first one, lying by your mission. You don't say something false, you just don't say the whole thing. You leave out the part that would force you to act. You leave out the hard truths. You can't hide from the consequences you refused face. Lying didn't start on social media, it started in the Garden of Eden. God asked, "Adam, did you eat the fruit?" And Adam said, "The woman you gave me, and just like that, lying, blaming, and outsourcing responsibility, entered human history. Adam didn't just get kicked out of Eden for eating the apple." He got kicked out for saying, "Yeah, but let me explain why it's not really my fault." And man, I've been facting that move ever since. Exaggeration. You inflate effort to feel progress. That's not momentum, that's self-sabetic, that's self-soothing. If you have noticed, I'm a little bit clogged up here, but I'm committed. I'm doing this, so that's not momentum, that's self-soothing. Exaggeration keeps you busy while your life stays the same. Minimization. It's not that bad. If it wasn't a problem, you wouldn't be explaining it. Minimization delays pain, it multiplies it later. Then there's comparison lies, at least I'm not like that guy. Person lowers the bar, so you don't have to rise. You don't measure your life against broken men. You measure it against your potential. Future tripping. Later is how men rent hope instead of building discipline. And there's spiritual bypass, I'm just going to go with the flow. I'm being patient. Only dead fish always go with the flow. No, you're hiding. Wisdom without action is cowardice, with better vocabulary. There's performance lying. That's where you're consuming instead of creating, learning instead of doing. If knowledge alone worked, you'd already be free. All these lies, protect one thing. Your identity. Not results. Identity. Because truth doesn't just change behavior. It threatens who you think you are. We didn't just normalize lying, we built an economy around it. If we look at social media, it's industrialized fraud. You got filters, you got angled, borrowed quotes. Everyone looks rich, everyone looks confident. It's wild how many millionaires are just one came in away from panic. Remember Adam walked, so influencers could rent lambo's. Yep, rented cars, rented houses, rented lifestyles. Nothing says I've made it, like returning the Ferrari before dinner. That's not success, that's cosplay. Here's a key. The system wants you distracted, confused, comparing, but real power, real freedom, it comes when you own your facts, brother, no matter how low it loud the noise is. You're not a victim of the lie economy, unless you choose to be. This is my truth, my truth, my truth isn't truth, it's belief with feelings. Ignoring facts is like standing in a flood with taper umbrella. You're not protected, you're just drowning in your own excuses. Facts don't care, facts keep score, reality always wins. The fruit tells the truth, your mouth won't, but here's the flip side. Men who face their fruit, they walk taller, they breathe deeper, they live later. No more pretending, no more defending, just movement. Reality stops being an enemy, the moment you stop fighting it. Now I'm not giving you a plan, I'm giving you a command. Right now what I want you to do is grab a pen, write this down. Where am I actually at? Where am I really inside of my health, wealth, relationship, and spirituality, and how does that actually feel? Where do I want to go, so where do I want to go, and how will it actually feel when I get there? So journal those questions, no filters, no excuses, let the fruit speak, and then decide where you stay asleep or you wake the hell up. If you want your life to change, stop lying, tell the facts. Reality knows where you're at, the only question is whether you're finally willing to face it. Alright brother, if you listen this long, you've obviously found some value, and other men will too, don't keep it to yourself, share it with a brother, remember to help the movement and share this with another couple men.