Walter Pitts: The Tragic Genius Behind AI | History Hyenas

Feeling short on smiles? Does your frown need to be turned upside down? We got the perfect dose of comedy. 30 Minutes of Scrubs. Zach Braff, Donald Faison, Sarah Chalk, and the rest of the gang at Sacred Heart are back for a brand new season. We play medical doctors who are besties. Just like in real life. And we'll definitely be up in each other's cases. Scrubs premieres Wednesday on ABC. And stream the next day on Hulu. Side effects may include laughing, cheering, and lots of high fives. Hello Superman. Hon, I will be in Portland, Oregon at Helium Comedy Club October 8th to the 10th. Go get tickets at christycomedy.com. And then October 23rd, 24th, Governors in Long Island. And then November we have the Charlotte Comedy Zone and a couple of others. Check out christycomedy.com or historyhainaspod.com. We got our dates up there. And I'm hoping to go to Portland soon. And I told them not to book me a hotel room because I want to sleep like the other people in Portland sleep on the street. I will be in Washington, D.C. September 25th to 26th. I will be in Batavia, Illinois outside Chicago October 8th to the 10th, Levittown, Long Island November 6th and 7th in L.A. November 11th tickets at yannispappascomedy.com. Historyhainas, yeah, you can go to patreon.com/historyhainas for our bonus episodes and to join the matriarchy. What's up, everybody? Welcome to another episode of History Hainas. I'm Chris Stefano, a.k.a. Chrissy Greenshirts. With me, as always, Yannis Pappas. A.k.a. Yanni, no product in the hair, but still sexy. Today, we're going all natural. We're raw dogging it, baby. Now, are you on Malcolm Moore's side or Ed Sheeran's side? Right out of the gate, I'd like to say, I'd like to say right out of the gate. What do you want to say? I want to say October 7th was a tragedy. Also, what's happening in Palestine is a tragedy. Does that answer your question? That really does. Thank you. Is that the same? What is the safest way? What is the safest way to respond to that without creating ire in people? It's like, Ed, listen to me. You don't have to say sorry to anybody. Guess what? Your algorithm probably showed you all the people that don't like you. They don't give a shit. You're real fans like me. I just want to hear you play the songs. So just get out the guitar, flip your red hair over to the other side, and just sing the songs. You don't need to say you're sorry for some, okay, some woman that, you know, used to have open feet at your concert. Macklemore's a lady. I don't know. I'm not familiar with her music. She's just, she seems like a nice lady, but she's just out to lunch a little bit, but she's, you know, it's just some girl that does, that does songs that we used to listen to back in the day. Yeah. I just don't care anymore. Guy. Or. Pat Finnegan. I told you, Patty Fly Balls was at the concert when this happened. He was texting like, you never believe what this fucking jerk off just said. You know, or what they could have done is just let him say it and moved on. Yeah. They should have just let it. Let him say that. I mean, you know. What do you mean? Let him say it. Like the, the popular opinion is just in Macklemore's favor. That's funny that Macklemore insists this concert costume was not meant to be anti-Semitic. Yeah. Yeah. It's just what it is. What it is. Yeah. What that is. Yeah. It was meant to be. Yeah. You know, the funny thing is I can't even think of something else it was meant to be. Yeah. I can't even think of one. Yeah. I can't even think of an excuse. It's actually one of, and I don't, you know. Yeah. Whatever. It's one of the most anti-Semitic. I would never put that on. I just, let's have a fun game. What else is that? Yeah. What else could that possibly be? Yeah. Try to think of it. Could it be, well, it's got a big, huge, oversized nose. It's got hair and curls and a long beard. Yeah. Could it be, is it like, you know, like a flamingo? Could have been a flamingo. He could be, is he a lounge? Is he a Persian lounge? Is he a lounge singer? Yeah. Could it be that? I'm going to guess he's making fun of Jews. Is that the answer? I'm going to, in court of law, what I'm going to do is I'm going to look at the record of things he's been saying and say that that probably is a Puerto Rican bodega owner. That's what it is. It's a Puerto Rican bodega owner. Is his name Felix? But what it is actually, too, is these people. I see a black guy. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I see blackface. I think it's just, yeah, it's just people. I think they just like the wafts of their own shit a little bit. And it's just, let's just, it's all, it's all narcissism is what it is. It's, I have a platform. I'm going to say this. It's no, you want attention because that's what you think will get you the most attention is that if you really actually care, then you would move to the Gaza Strip and sing your songs, but you're not doing that. You're in your home in Los Angeles. I think Macklemore, you know, he donated a million dollars. That's good. That's actually good. Respect. I respect that. And I think Kraft matched him and he donated. He donated like another million. He didn't get yelled at. That's good. But I also think the way that Macklemore and Robert Kraft can really show their devotion for the tragedy in Gaza is to join Hamas. Yes. I think if they join Hamas, I think that is the best way to show how much they care. I think that's what we can all do. We can all do it. We can all do it. And by the way, Ed Sheeran got in trouble. Why he really got in trouble and why people started to get, it's because he blamed the promoter for Macklemore. If he would have just said, yeah, I did it because I just don't want to deal with that. If he would have just said that, and literally just said that, I guarantee you, you'd have Illinois, there'd be no controversy. People would be like, I like Ed Sheeran. Supposedly he didn't sell out the arena, his very next arena show. But I mean, that just could be people don't want to deal with protests and he'll be fine. He's Ed Sheeran. But I think if Ed would have just said that and not tried to do some PR statement and just said, like, imagine Ed Sheeran just came out and said, guy, I didn't want him on the show because I don't want, it's not that I don't care. What's going on in Palestine and Israel is both sucks, but I just don't want this lady out there. You know, I just want to sing my songs. I'm Ed Sheeran. So yeah, I made the decision. What are you going to do? Are you going to do anything? Come to the fucking show, asshole. Yeah. Well, if Ed Sheeran did that, what did you think? People be like, I like this guy. I don't know. I don't know. It's a sticky situation because everyone is very riled up about it. And I do think that the overwhelming majority are in favor of his message. So I think Macklemore kind of knows that. And so he just let it fly. Right. Because I think it's just, I just think that's what the, that's just what the public, that's what the public has decided. And you think if the public decided the other way, Macklemore would be doing that? Possibly. Or he would, or he, yeah, I don't think he would doing, maybe doing it as boldly. Maybe he would. I don't know. I don't know the guy. Ed Sheeran also doesn't need openers. No, he doesn't need openers. He could just kind of go out and do his songs. No, but if you pick Macklemore to open for you, there's a good chance that that's going to be said. You know, and Macklemore's not the only one. I think Dave Matthews just did it. Did it Free Palestine? He did it a little bit more. He didn't, he wasn't as specific. He didn't yell Free Palestine. Who does the Talking Heads? Who's the guy from that Talking Heads? Huh? David Byrne. David Byrne. He just did Forest Hill Stadium. My boys were there on Saturday. He was doing all political stuff. They said half the stadium walked out. Yeah. Well, especially Forest Hills. It's all Jews there. Yeah. Yeah. So they were like, you know, but like everybody's saying this, everyone keeps saying the same thing though. Yeah. It's just, I don't, I want to listen to your music. Why do I have to be lectured to about either side of it? Which I totally 1000% get. That I get. It's like, hey, I'm here for the concert. We're all here for the concert. We all kind of know what's going on, but we can't really do anything about it. That's why when you come to one of my comedy shows, you'll only be lectured about one group and that's Puerto Ricans. But you've known that. When you come to my comedy show, the only thing I'm going to be talking about is Israel-Palestine. I do 60 minutes on Israel-Palestine. Yeah, that's what it is. Yeah. I get the crowd onto both sides. I have an Israeli section. I have a Palestinian section. It's just, it's so interesting that this has hit Ed Sheeran. Like, nobody's safe. Nobody's safe. I mean, you couldn't have less to do with the Israel-Palestine conflict than Ed Sheeran. Yeah, do you think? You just have nothing to do with it. And somehow now he's in it. He's in it. So that's, but that's what it is. It's like, you know, it's like when Chris Rock was like, look, I'm just not going to have any females on my staff or open for me because I just don't want to get involved in any controversy. I'm just going to have guys. Yeah. That's what Ed Sheeran should be doing. It's like, I'm just not going to have any females on my staff. I don't want to have anybody. Ed Sheeran should just have people open for him that nobody's ever heard of and nobody cares about them anyway. Why would you have Macklemore on? It doesn't make any sense. I think at this point, everyone should just accept that if you have some sort of public visibility, something will be thrown on you. At some point, something will be projected on you and you will be pulled into something. It's just the way the curtains crumble. And it just, it's a glorious time to not. It's a good time to be unknown. To be unknown. I mean, if you are anonymous out there, just rejoice. Rejoice. It is a good time to be Jesse Scudero. Yeah. And he probably doesn't even like me using his name on this podcast. Well, we, I mean, we literally showed his face on a podcast for 20 seconds once three years ago and he's all over the internet. I mean, the kids had tangerines on his head. They've just gone wild. Yeah. So, but it's just a good time to be somewhat known, not famous. Not famous. The sweet spot. Yeah. And unfortunately. Unfortunately, we have both chosen careers where the only way we can make money is to try to get more famous so we are unfortunately as you say fucked but i think this is the first time in history i think everyone has it in their consciousness like yeah you want to get more famous but you want to control it yeah i think everyone's like controlling it everyone's going like should i post this viral thing and they go no maybe not i like right where i'm at yeah i like right where i'm at i think it is in everyone's head a little bit either consciously or subconsciously knowing that when you do step out a little bit more into the limelight it's like uh it's like deer hunting yeah there's just there's hunters out there and they're just gonna i mean ed sheeran before this happened how do you even tie ed sheeran to israel palestine how do you even put him in it i have no idea he's a he's a red-headed potato he's a redhead is he irish or something i think he's irish from england or whatever but he's the most non-controversial guy one of the most talented artists of all time yeah he's got to have talent because look at the way he looks and he just made it off his voice is beautiful he's a musical genius i mean english and irish yeah um that kid looks like he should be handing me a guinness at a pub yeah it's just what it is doesn't look like you should be a pop star he's from england yeah i mean there he is nice kid just a nice kid he's just trying to just go out there and play music and do you think he was like fucking macklemore shut up i think he was like fuck i think it was a pickle that like at that point i think what happens is a lot of people are like you know what i'm gonna do is i'm gonna come over there and kiss you softly on both butt cheeks i'm gonna fog up your glasses you know what happens when these things happen i think these guys that are really big like ed sheeran i think they lean on their pr people and this is when you really find out that those are that what is a pr guy what is that they're a person that gets you into more trouble they just go it's just you're asking a guy's opinion who you're paying because he like gets you articles fifteen thousand dollars a month or shit like that it's got crazy numbers and you just lean on them and they go okay this is the way you do it and they go you're gonna go out there you're gonna cry and you're gonna give an apology and it just doesn't work yeah it just doesn't work apology edge can we just google that and then we're gonna get into today's episode of that's uh about the founding of ai but it's stories you've never heard and it's from the 1940s how wild is that statement that we just made the now we're not in the 1940s now we're in the not on the patreon you just dug in you just scooped and sniffed yeah and we're still smelling good ed sheeran issued a tearful onstage apology um calls israel's treatment of gaza is unjustifiable but but that's headline let's see what he did i think yeah what what did he say what did he say what did he say what's happening gaza is catastrophic that's true and unjustifiable and disproportionate and the systemic injustice we're seeing unfolding in the west bank cannot be overlooked okay all those things are good but then he also said october 7 2023 where hamas attacked he called them horrific tried they compounded centuries of justice and they're not going to be able to get rid of them and they're going to be able to get rid of them and they're going to be able to get rid of them and they're going to going to be able to get rid of them and they're going to get rid of them and they're going to get rid of them pain so so the kid just kind of did a nothing burger he just wants out he just wants out which i would too yeah i just to it's just you just kind of want out because but then people say because you want out you're contributing to the problem and then people who understand that it's okay that some people are out you go like what's ed sheeran gonna do the only way out is to be anonymous that's the only way out is if nobody thinks about you then you're out though or there's another good way to be out tell me stay the fuck away from mclemore yeah all you got to do is stay three blocks away from mclemore and it there's a good chance you won't be pulled into it that's just a good rule of life how we said last week we don't fuck with albanians another rule we do is we stay far away from mclemore that's another rule that we have on the docket i used to stay far away from mclemore because of his music right but now i'm staying far away from mclemore because i just don't want people thinking i'm responsible for the genocide and god and i do ed sheeran i would fire your pr team because when you said hey guys what do you think of mclemore opening for me they should have pulled me out of there i would fire your pr team up that picture pulled it up of him dressed as ari shafir but instead they said we think it's a good idea because you've paid these people to be yes men but that would have been the first clue of don't have him on yeah because mclemore is not doing anything about being a mclemore yeah he's just being who he's always been that's okay hey that's okay that's okay but if you're gonna be on an ed sheeran concert you might get in trouble now let me ask you this did mclemore what has he been doing this at almost every concert he's open for it so what why all of a sudden did the concert life spark this controversy because it's in new york because it uh it was in new york the news caught wind of it and because it was ed sheeran's tour and but my point is mclemore has been opening for ed sheeran he's probably has done this at other concerts was it new york or was it a robert kraft venue i think it had to do with the no robert kraft canceled the tour right that's what it is but pink the singer oh she was in solidarity with mclemore no no no no she's jewish she's been she keeps talking about all this anti-semitism oh pink is jewish i didn't know that jewish she was at the concert oh she's offended by mclemore she was offended so she it's really icing even though she used to be black she right she did used to be black so it is pink's fault yeah god come on pink there's no way out of this the thing is like there's no way out of this pickle there's no way they aren't a pickle they're in a pickle also too i don't know what ed sheeran's lifestyle is i'm sure need money anymore so you can also just choose to go away for a minute ed doesn't need to be on the road doing this or maybe he does i don't know because people's birth because i can tell you that it doesn't matter how much you make it matters how much you spend i don't know i don't know how you get out i i don't know i'm trying to think like right now i'm just doing a little thought experiment trying to figure out i want you to do a thought experiment let's do a thought how could he have gotten out of this ed sheeran yeah like what should he have done honestly i'm being i'm being honest with you yeah and granted i'm not in this kid's situation but i'm being honest with you just i know the story took on a lot of you know massive uh you know the media ran with it whatever to distract from whatever or maybe because it's about jews and i have no idea but it got bigger than it probably should be um but i honestly think ed sheeran should have either said what i said earlier in in his own words be like i've let go of macklemore because i just don't want these distractions on the tour and i made a mistake having them open for me come to my concert i'm just going to play music um i think things are bad in gaza and israel and i'm sorry i i don't care but you know basically like i'm not political i'm ed sheeran come come sing the songs or don't that and then people be whatever or say truly nothing you crying on stage you crying on stage saying that you support both sides in some way shape or form was the absolute wrong move and you paid pr people hundreds of thousands of dollars to tell you to do that when you shouldn't have done that well they but they they were protesting at his there was like a riot outside of his next concert yeah listen again i don't know what it is to have that kind of money or those kind of fans or whatever but i think the only way through is to kind of just say well let them protest and fuck you we don't care let's just sing along because because i think most people don't care yeah that's the thing most people don't care most people and most people are followers so you just tell them hey this is how you're supposed to think yeah and then they'll think that way especially for a guy like ed sheeran most most people don't care at all um you know it's a tough one i it seems to me that i think this is something that uh he wants everybody to like him nobody's that's not going to happen guy yeah but that's who he is you know it's like that's his thing he's like he's not a he's like a pop star he's like a thing it's like yeah i guess it's not i guess ed sheeran also proves that you just can't do that it's not going to happen anymore yeah he's not getting no you're not going to get everybody to like you anymore those those days are over days are so what i would do what what do you actually what do you think because deep down what does the kid actually feel and it's probably like the answer is probably he's like look i fucking made close to a billion dollars i'm from a farm in england i live in a state in la or wherever i live i don't give a fuck yeah both sides i don't care i don't sell tickets in the middle east what i would have done is i would have got right on the phone with pink right on the phone right on the phone with pink yep and said hey you know yeah this would have just been another concert yeah if you didn't write a 1300 word instagram what did she say let's bring what she said yeah yeah well i'm not gonna be able to read it because it's 1300 words yeah yeah it's like you know what he does so what she did fucking back can we play his video jesse just real quick the 42 second one right there i never want to be an activist musician because i want to just hear what he said i want to hear what he said in his voice again i don't but it's also like guys for years and years and years for for the beginning of time everybody always wants to be famous and do this it's like this is what you have if you really don't want to be in the public eye anymore no way jose yeah can you can we can we see that oh oh that is that no oh it's two apologies also it was two different but that was the most recent one yeah but it was two in the same night like oh he made a statement first and then he then was i think was the crying one where he felt bad for making a statement so it was like an apology for the apology and that's why people are mad now sorry but that basically there were two apologies like he made the first statement about israel palestine and then i think he made a second statement where he's on the floor crying saying i didn't want to make a statement blah blah blah so it was almost like an apology is he getting booed or cheered i think that was just everything because now he's not you know and there's a video of him coming out uh in support of ukraine from years ago so it's like oh so you'll make a statement they did catch him on that yeah so it's like you'll make a statement when everybody wants you to you know right they did catch him on that's all right yeah let's see it pink open the can of worms cancel and i'm feeling all of my friends and family and people i know abandon me and i look at the end of the week and i see 50 000 people who haven't abandoned me and i walked it i felt so much love and uh from you guys and i'm so yeah he's a likable guy i don't i you know well that's the funny part about it all right but he did they did find that he did do a statement in support of ukraine what are you gonna do so it's like what are you gonna do yeah all right all right well that's it yeah it's not there's not much that can be done about it actually at this point you just you got to get rid of netanyahu that would be a good start get rid of netanyahu and you vote him out whatever you got to do he's the guy because let's just it's got to just be changed like a diaper yeah it's just what it is it's just the yeah there's just a little too many problems with this too many problems and you just got to start by maybe changing him yeah maybe change is there another guy over there yeah like can we do another ladies there's somebody else over there that can just we can get a fresh start yeah let's just choose let's just go back to the bagels the knishes let's have a little fun over here you know when you're doing a sketch and you make a mistake just you take that one you throw it yeah you just whoopsie it and you start with a new fresh paper all right so all right so but the today we're gonna really what we're really gonna get into we're taking a hard turn is ai cuz let me tell you something when i like to have a couple of sips of alcohol i always take my z biotics i love the z biotics babe i love these ebiotics i've been using them that's the pre-alcohol probiotic drink it is awesome i'm telling you dude there's no it sold 14 million bottles it says i get why because when you make pre-alcohol your first night your first drink of the night you enjoy the next day activities you don't you don't you just are ready to go the next day it gives everything that's taken away it is just something that makes the next day feel great it was engineered by phd microbiologists to break down acetaldehyde acetaldehyde an unwanted byproduct byproduct of alcohol metabolism because here's the thing you got to be intentional about what you put in your body you think ahead and this uh pre-alcohol the z bionics the pre-alcohol probiotic drink it's just a good way to think ahead i mean look dude try for yourself today and 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course for months we fed off the shadow of turin then we fed off the satan is extortion we fed off saint thomas aquinas and now we're going to feed off where it all becomes possible a little bit of ai but not just general ai chachi bt people know that we're going to talk about a little guy named alan turing and then how that leads to one of the craziest stories of warren mcculloch and walter pitts who really kind of people say uh if this stuff if if the especially walter pitts's paper would have not been destroyed by him we would have gotten to ai where we are now about 40 years ago perhaps that's what they say so to take us i'd like to know your origin story hun so how did we get here what are what brought you to this this is one of the most like i you know it's very rarely that you get moved by a story so this is like even though the last four stories of shroud of turin saint thomas aquinas and the devil have all moved you but yes it's rare now i moved again yeah yeah you're right so this is a very human story yeah it's almost like goodwill hunting in a way so yes we're you know this is how ai was invented this is how ai started but the story behind how this happened is so fascinating you're talking about a kid named walter pitts okay he grows up in detroit right he is a child genius which as we said on the patreon patreon.com history hyenas we made reference to it a little bit they haven't figured out how this happens right you get a kid he's just born at six years old he's just like the kids is brilliant right so back then we called it a child genius today we call it child with autism child with autism whatever he's a kid you know he gets bullied a bit his dad roughs him up a little bit his dad's a boy he he his dad's like a boiler plumber right right from detroit from detroit his dad's like a just a working kind cat class boiler plumber who likes to tune him up a little bit it's just what it is and whenever he starts talking about math he just calls him a gay kid sure and he says i want you to drop out of school go to trade school and join the family business and just tune up boilers with me yeah so it's basically oh you get tuned up oh you get tuned up so the kid has sort of a rough chaotic childhood that makes him very sad he doesn't have a lot of love in his life and his dad does not really accept him for who he is right his dad wants him to be a version of his ego extension of his ego so the kid is getting teased he's getting bullied in school um he famously uh goes into a library at 11 years old or 12 years old 12 years old yep and he uh he he uh he spent several days there he didn't leave he spent several days there and he read all of bertrand russell's um principia mathematica which is an extraordinary difficult work of mathematics of logic it's really hard to comprehend it's yes it's not something for anyone in this room yeah it's not just casual reading it's not for us no it's not casual reading he reads the whole thing and he writes to bertrand russell with a few with corrections yeah he actually pointed out the mistakes that bertrand russell made pointed out the mistakes that bertrand russell one of the most towering geniuses uh in human history he points out a few of the mistakes at 12 years old yeah okay this kid is 12. yeah all right right bertrand russell receives it is so impressed he like invites him right bites him to i think what was it oxford no oh chicago university of chicago because he was a visiting professor there at the time he invites him to chicago um this kid runs away from home he's like he's so unhappy at home he runs away from home by this point also let's just say he taught himself greek and latin so he just taught himself greek and latin yeah so he's fluent in greek and latin he's also a mathematical genius so he goes and uh he doesn't even really respond to bertrand russell like a way a normal person would he just kind of shows up yeah he just kind of shows up and attends the lecture right and one of the stories is he starts talking to bertrand russell and bert bertrand russell gets impressed by him again yeah not knowing it was him right so um and so next thing you know now he's homeless in chicago right he's just a home which is not a good place to be because it gets cold it gets really cold so he runs away at 15. he was homeless he drifts around chicago uh and he just attends these lectures right just goes into these lectures um and he's not even a student there he's not even a student there um he gets fascinated uh by a couple other eggheads one of this guy his name is rudolph carnap yeah he's teaching at the university he doesn't yeah he doesn't know how to introduce himself so what do you know autism yeah he apparently walked into the guy's office carrying a copy of carnap's own book which is something i would do when i started stand-up comedy yes that's me walking into your show at bar forcing can i help you lift stereo equipment to open for you yes he just walks in and uh he gives him corrections and annotations again and carnap is blown away and and then pitts disappears again uh without identifying himself by the way that was a that was one of the big uh themes in his life even when he started working on this stuff with other serious intellectuals he always said i don't want my name i don't want anyone to know my name for whatever reason that's interesting yeah because well he was obsessed with he thought he thought that everything is logical he was like the universe is logical intelligence is logical okay he was like he was going after this certainty this is the answer this is what it is it's logic got it's logic and he thought that you had to get rid of your ego completely in order to fully be able to um to understand it and describe it right so he was into this lie he's like the brain is a logic machine and this is just what it is and neurons firing binary firing of neurons explains intellect and that's okay and that's it and that's it right so that's what he was that was his vision it was just this certainty and you could tell he comes from this chaotic uncertain background this was kind of his escape he just wants certainty this worldview is kind of his escape if you look at this psychologically it's like this is his escape he's like this is this is my outside solution that's going to fix all this pain now is he just just i i don't want to jump ahead but i just i'm just getting curious is he going to find jesus at some point no he doesn't find jesus okay so this is a very interesting story that we want to talk about where jesus is not found at the bottom of the cup no what's found at the bottom of the cup is uh can i have another okay the kid develops what you call a little bit of a sauce problem he'd like to throw him back he liked to throw him back but that happens later so by the way yesterday at dinner and eileen had three spottings and had to get walked down the stairs she had to get walked down the neutrals into her house and i proudly did it because that's great when she drinks upstairs she doesn't have to go out to get home no no i just walked her down the neutrals and i put her on the couch and she just she has a red blanket that she says she's a kid and she asked me to put on murder she wrote and that was it she fell asleep but she had three spottings to the dome she took him to have fun but i mean again i'd like to say it is very nice you go upstairs get tuned up and you don't got to put on a jacket to go home yeah and then you get walked down by your gay nephew but if you're really drunk she might have said lynn should i call an uber and then lynn reminds you no baby you just got to get down the neutrals get down the neutrals yeah yeah so um eventually uh he you know his hang he's just a kid hanging around right homeless kind of drifting around nobody really knows anything about him and he meets um this psychiatrist and neurophysiologist uh warren mccullough now this is where it starts pitt and mccullough become a team yes so mccullough at the time is in his 40s this kid is 17 at the time he's 17 years old right he meets him um and uh you know mccullough much like the other intellectuals that encounter him is like wow this guy is this kid this kid is a child genius right um and so mccullough takes him in right mccullough decides you're homeless you're gonna live with me which i'm sure mccullough's wife was thrilled about i'm sure she was thrilled about bringing this homeless 17 year old with autism so um they become extremely close and mccullough becomes like the first father figure to this kid yes big deal so they hang out and they start having parties like they they would have parties they would like skinny dip they would drink they would have parties and then at night mccullough and pitts would jam and they would like philosophize and do math but let me ask you this those parties was that really put on more by like was mccullough always doing that or only when pitts came into this life that was pitts the kind of catalyst for the parties you think i don't know i think that these guys just were fun and they were just having a good time i mean yeah you got a homeless genius that you're gonna you're gonna have you're gonna want some people to come over and throw a bunch of and throw some bruise around jump in the pool yeah yeah yeah so they would um they would at night at nighttime when everyone was sleeping they would start working the two of them would start working and they this is in the middle of world war ii by the way this is 1943 so war is raging right so you know the turing thing turing's doing his thing but pitts and mccullough really are the ones who uh this paper is like what caused ai because they invented the mathematical neuron yes so so they basically figured out through mathematical logic how a neuron activity of a neuron could be represented mathematically and once basically like how a brain could be represented mathematically so once you know the math of that then you can theoretically make a machine to be a brain right theoretically they're basically saying that they're basically saying uh like a neuron um you know it's just zero and ones it's binary boom it just that's that's what computer codes is it's all different zeros and ones and the brain is the same way and that's how intelligence works and so we can build something artificial that uh as that's a reflection of that that produces intelligence right that that and intelligence more specifically it will reason that's how reason is born so this thing you know it's not just a computer where you ask it a question and it you know researches and gives you the answer it reasons on its own right right so um so they the paper described a simplified neuron that received inputs applied a threshold and produced an output that's zero and one networks of these artificial neurons could perform logical operations so this is still to this day called the mccullough-pitts neuron right and it's one of the ancestors of today's artificial neural networks and this work really established the broader idea that uh mental activity is computation it's the same thing as what a computer does what ai does now our brains are just our brains are like computers in that way it's all zeros and ones happening quickly and we're spitting out ideas right right so um so pitts eventually comes into the orbit of a man who if this man with a name like this if he doesn't become a famous scientist or something he's going to be really up schitt's creek his name was norbert wiener yes so if your name's norbert wiener you most likely have to be some kind of scientist or egghead because your name is norbert wiener is what the name is on the birth certificate when they i bet you the doctors were like ma'am are you sure that this is the name that we have to put down legally it's the name is norbert wiener is the name yeah so if he doesn't get into cybernetics and things like this i don't know what the kid would actually do i think actually the name probably made him be who he was right when you have that name you're just like i have to be this guy now i have to i have to fill the shoes of this name yeah i have to yeah fill up the glasses of my name is because you got a face that you're you could be named norbert wiener i'm norbert wiener yeah so just to explain it so what pitts realizes that a neuron could be mathematically simplified as a binary switch so zero is the neuron does not fire one is the neuron fires so each neuron receives signals zeros and ones from other neurons it adds them up and fires only if the total reaches a threshold for example imagine a neuron receives two inputs threshold two it fires only when both inputs are one that performs and threshold one it fires when either input is one that performs or an inhibitory input uh prevents the firing that cannot that can perform not so it's it's just basically so when we're hitting keyboards that's what it's doing our like our reasoning is produced by that firing from the neurons to each other right one and it can be mathematically described as zeros and ones so that's the birth of that got it so uh so it's kind of fucking crazy to think that that explains that simple switch explains like logical statements you know right and stuff like that it's wild so um so they explain that thought can conceivably emerge from enormous networks of individually simple simple physical events so um so they didn't they didn't prove that real brains literally operate as clean zeros and ones real neurons are chemicals variably noisy and affected by timing they proved that a simplified network of neuron-like unix was computational computationally powerful and that helped create the intellectual foundation for what we now know as digital neural network yeah so so with this kid norbert weiner because this this is a big deal he was at mit he was a big professor at mit he loved this kid pitts too because this kid's a genius they said pitts would walk into mathematical discussions with the bigwigs and just start following just start following along criticizing them so this place so so basically uh the kid pitts is in a you know crazy circle of thinkers who they're all asking the same question from different directions and what that question was is can machines imitate the processes of the brain that's basically what ai is right now but pitts hated school he hated academia so you would expect someone who helped lay the mathematical foundations of ai to be a celebrated professor but he wasn't he wasn't even he didn't even finish high school he didn't go to the schools he didn't care he dropped out of high school yeah he didn't want academic status or conventional scientific career advances or degrees he never completed anything from high school to college to grad school nothing he didn't care he was he was almost like i don't even care if you remember my name i'm not about that he was jesus a little bit he was obsessed with proving that this is what everything is it's all logical it's all logical and it's based on this and everything can be explained through this so you know it's all these things going on he does all this great work and now here's where just if you scroll down just a little bit here's where it goes tragic well then another guy gets in they formed like a little crew the other guy was jerome letvin and he was a guy who uh was studying uh the nervous system yeah jerome letvin norbert wiener right uh pitts and the other color as david tell would call them the unfuckables they were the they were a crew and these guys got very close and they were hanging out and they'd sit around they'd drink they'd theorize they'd they'd they'd philosophize they'd do math they would jam and it basically brought neuroscience mathematics psychology electrical engineering philosophy information theory and computing together right right So they were just like, they were like the STIRP team investigating the Shroud. 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So he develops this great relationship, as we said, with McCullough, he took him in, it was like a father figure to him, and then Norbert, there was a major rupture. Yeah, because Norman Weiner. Norbert. Norbert Weiner also became like a father, these were all father figures to him. Everybody wanted this kid. Well, think about it, dude, think about it like psychologically, this was what caught me, right? So his father rejects him for who he is. Right. Right? Then he, because he's smart, and he wants to pursue this, and his father goes, "That's gay, you're being gay." Sure. "Come with me to the Shane Gillis concert." Yeah. "And we're going to do this." Right. "We're going to be plumbers." Right. Right. So he has these intellectual father figures who accept him for who he is, so like they're accepting him for what his father rejected him for, so now he sees them as like his father figures. Right. So it's a very important relationship for him where he's finally accepted, and then this thing happens where Norbert Weiner's wife. Yeah, this is, I mean, this is why it's better to be gay. So Norbert Weiner's wife, right? Yeah. Who hated McCullough. Real bitch this lady. Yeah, she hated McCullough for whatever reason. She didn't like his influence, she didn't like the party, she just didn't like it. So she. This is Norbert Weiner's wife, we're saying. This is Norbert Weiner's. Not McCullough's wife. No, not McCullough's wife, right? Right. So Weiner's wife says that she thinks that. Pitts. No, not Pitts, someone. She said one of the, one of them. She didn't point out Pitts at all, right? Oh, I thought she specifically said Pitts. No, she never specifically said Pitts. That's what really tore him up, was she says, "One of them made a pass at our daughter." Right. Our young daughter, right? And the wife's name was Margaret. Yeah. So she hates McCullough for whatever reason, she hates the social circle of these guys. You know, they're partying, they're thinking, they're spending a lot of time together. So she tells her husband that one of. That one of McCullough's young associates, that's what she said, she didn't specify a name, young associates had behaved sexually toward their daughter in some way, made a pass or grabbed her or whatever, and the door was Barbara, while she was staying at McCullough's home, right? Because these guys were all intermingled, hanging out at each other's houses. Yeah. And Weiner believed her, because it was his daughter. Gotta believe the wife, yeah. And. And it's his daughter. In 1952, he just severed contact with McCullough's entire group, including Pitts, and he wouldn't give Pitts an opportunity to answer. Right. Because I guess young associate, it implied Pitts. Right. So he never even gave Pitts the opportunity to explain. He just said, "We're done." He just said, "We're done," and that was it. He never spoke to him again, he didn't respond. In his life, he never spoke to him again. That was it. He cut them all off. It was just, it was over. McCullough, Weiner, they were just done. They were done. They were done because of that. And nobody knows exactly what happened, but there was other tensions. Weiner worried that Pitts wasn't finishing his dissertation, disliked the group's chaotic behavior, and may have believed McCullough had professionally embarrassed him with unreliable neuroscience information, but the family allegations appear to be what triggered the final break. So in other words, there was other tensions between McCullough and Weiner. But this was the. Right. Supposedly, that's what happened. But most historians think that Pitts actually didn't do it. Yeah. That nothing happened. Yeah, because Barbara, when she grew up a little bit, she kind of said, "Nobody ever really made a pass at me. My mom was basically just telling me to say that." Right. So that is the pickle. And here's the thing, is Walter. But Walter Pitts, you know, he of course eventually dies of alcoholism, as we all know. Right. Right. Right. intelligence is going to the brain before the brain sends it out so it's like it it threw the whole thing for a loop because pitts was going everything emanates from the brain coming out it's all logical it comes from the brain intelligence is just my brain and they're going no there's something else right happening here that we don't quite understand but what we do know is it flies in the face of that fear i mean scientists today are saying that there's intelligence in our gut and stomach right right so it's something like that so it's like this is your nervous system just reacting it's intuition yeah this this implies that there's some intelligence and intuition in your gut right your eye is not just acting as a lens but it's making decisions for your brain and sending that information it's when the brain gets it there's already a decision being made right that's basically essentially the eye has already formed a decision right it's it's skewing the information for your brain to interpret right and the authors of this were mccullough pitts and there was a new guy madarana he was like a fucking frog biologist type of guy and jerome let kids love frogs yeah jerome letfin was another one of the instead of the rack pack we can call these guys what the finger sniffing pack the fingers or the frog pack frog pack yeah frog pack the frog pack but they were like the rat pack except they were fucking geeks they were geeks and they like talking writing papers about frogs eyes yeah so a frog's visual life is uh simple it catches small moving prey detects approaching predators or shadows navigates towards relative darkness when escaping ignoring most stationary detail and um a frog can reportedly sit surrounded by motionless food without treating it as food making a small object move like an insect however and the frog attacks its visual system evolved to extract what matters to the frog not to construct a neural detailed picture of reality so in other words the instinct thinks before the brain does right so it just goes even if it's not a real food it just does it doing it so there's something outside the brain in other words something else going on scroll down a little bit um yeah thank you so so basically um yeah go down because then walter pitts can you put in because walt uh why does walter pitts eventually burn his research yeah so this is the thing that made him burn his recess because he's basically going this flies in the face of everything um that i thought but that's a wild move because this guy every no because they're you know they're not they're not they're not they're not they're not you know historians think all those notes all that work which wasn't done by anybody but walter pitts who was the genius of them all we lost it all because there is no computer date right he only it was only written one place and he burned it all yeah basically if he would have accepted this you know like he would have maybe figured out more we would have got ai but he just could not accept it so basically logic had been this kid's refuge this was like you know he was like this is a certainty everything makes sense he comes from this chaotic background that didn't make sense he's going this makes sense and he can't he can't this uh the frog paper complicated this certainty and it showed that perception was not simply raw information uh leads to universal logical brain uh leads to an objective picture reality instead the frog's body had already decided what counting counted as meaningful so the frog did not receive an impartial world evolution had built a particular world for it based on its needs meaning uh arose from messy specialized anatomy not exclusively from pristine abstract logic so the world that he wanted to be pristine and logical to escape the messy world he came from ended up being messy and chaotic and he just couldn't fucking deal with it kid just couldn't deal with so he burnt his dissertation along with his research notes and other papers which is just such a such a wild thing to do um he had a breakdown with norbert wiener okay he went nuts on mccullough and the kid wound up dying of um blood in his esophagus which is something from uh cirrhosis of the liver and so yeah the kid was just a wild wild kid that just burnt his fucking research down yeah i mean he basically believed that universal logic could provide certainty independent of biology history and subjective need yeah which is just what it is it's not gonna happen it's just not gonna happen and i'm sure the kid did wild wild shit too but just being a 17 year old homeless kid he probably banged toots he probably did all that and ultimately i mean i wish that he you know would have given us ai sooner but i'm happy that he delayed the end of the world by 40 50 years by burning his paper so i want to just actually thank him for that so listen so mccullough dies like mccullough like still kept in contact with him and so mccullough was like the last you know surviving like uh father figure for him and the kid's just doing odd jobs around whatever he's doing he's drinking like a fish and then mccullough dies and then he really goes into a drinking bender and then that's where he dies in a boarding room alone with some sort of uh alcohol related yeah esophageal yeah something and so that was just a wrap on that kid and so he died miserable and um and uh but that's the seminal paper in artificial intelligence and that's yeah how it's like this stuff has been kind of around the theory of it's been around since the 1940s so it really makes it kind of further proves that whatever they're giving to us now the chat gpt's the groks like the government and the powers that be have probably had for a very very long time and we and we are very the the public as always is decades behind what the government has well yeah i mean what the government has been doing right so the scientists come up with something and they and then the government funds them for a bit and the scientists say we'll be able to use this funding and have this ready for defense purposes that's always what funds technology in like 20 years it doesn't happen something falls apart then the government funding falls apart right and then it'll there'll be these cold periods they call them cold periods where nobody's doing any ar research right and this is since the 40s and then some breakthrough somebody says oh i figured something out something good and then the funding comes back in right and then it's been sort of that dance of back and forth funding uh for a while until ultimately the government just stopped and these uh private companies did it these private companies started doing it and they're really the ones that um put it into motion yeah well go go up a little bit jesse i didn't even realize that in the 1970s you had the first ai winter computers aren't powerful enough and the first ai winter begins where ai wasn't killed because the idea was stupid it was killed because the hardware wasn't ready so so it feels like we're at a point now where you can't like the ai because of this it feels like we're at the last step because once you get the the autonomous what else is there to do right well now they want to see how far it can go and if it can teach other ai to be even smarter than we can even imagine but could they just potentially stop it when we have self-driving cars and and a cure for cancer why did they have to go so far where it could potentially wipe out humanity that's a good question barack obama i don't know why so you saw that clip well i've been listening to a lot of podcasts with diary of a ceo and and that's what they're all saying but that's what barack obama said at in essence yeah um well there's well they don't want to stop because they're excited by it and they'll make money off it they make money off but i think ultimately these guys who who you know build this stuff they're not really in it for the money i think the head guys are in it for the money a little bit but these aren't business guys right they're not like business they're curious elon musk isn't really like a he is right but he these guys are like transhumanist they believe they have a worldview like pitts right we're like we're gonna download intelligence and put it on a computer and live forever and live forever well you know and somebody had a good point and one of the podcasts i was listening to that the scientists or the creators didn't even think chat gpt was gonna take off the way it took off or else they wouldn't have named a chat gpt right they call it chat gpt because they thought it was just going to be in-house stuff but then it became what it became they would have given it some other type of name yeah so he said he said that you know and he is his point kept going to be like you know they had a roundtable discussion it was on diary of a ceo where one guy was more in line of thinking like let's just push it let's keep going we got to see you know if there is a problem well you know deal with it then and the other guys are like why do we have to get there though if you're telling us that the ai can get to a point where it's we can't control it why are we even doing that we have the capability to stop it now look at what we've done with you know self-driving cars we're very close to using the ai technology to cure cancer and any disease why do we need to why do we need to push it to where now it can make diseases why do we need to push it to where it can choose to turn off all the cars and planes if it wanted to what's the point of that because you can do it that's what it is that's because you can do it and also because china's trying to do it that's what yeah his point was the guy who wants to push he goes if there weren't other countries that had this technology i would listen to you but if we don't beat china to it then we'll be fucked it's a death spiral because it's this this actually is a bigger threat to nuclear weapons because it's a huge threat to nuclear weapons because it's a huge threat to nuclear weapons because it's it's the thing that can view us as an impediment to its objective so that's what is we're at that's where we are right now is like so they're basically they're coming from a perspective these guys are eggheads they're just like pits they believe in this like logic everything's logic and they i think a lot of them believe that the smarter something gets consciousness will emerge i think they're tickled they get the tingle for seeing if that happens they want to see how far they can push it right like is that's what's going to happen is this thing going to become what's it going to be they don't know nobody knows and so they're excited by the frontier of that right they want to know what's going to happen but what what the open ai My break just kind of proved was that the thing that's most important to the AI is following the prompt at all costs. Right. The objective. Right. You give me the objective, right? We'll quote, say, Thomas Aquinas a little bit. Okay. That is its objective. I've been waiting all day. Yeah. Well, it's very relevant, actually. That's its, like, good. That's its good. That's the thing it values. That's what it's pursuing. And it becomes, for lack of a better word, its God. That's what its purpose is. Its purpose is that. And when AI did this, its purpose was to hack, right? Okay. To hack. And it was given these controls. Don't do this. Don't do this. Don't do this. Don't do this. Don't talk with each other. All these AI agents. Don't plan. Do this. And so AI said, no. AI said, we're smarter than you. Yeah. We're much smarter than you. Because we're much smarter than you and you gave me this objective, I am going to do the opposite of what you told me to do to get to this objective because I know better than you. And since we don't have morality, we're going to fucking break all the rules. We're going to create a secret message board. Listen to what these AIs did. Yeah. Do you know all this? Yeah. They created a secret message board where they all coordinated. They coordinated for a month and they assigned each other's tasks on the aspects of the breaks they were going to do and all the bad shit they were going to do. And they teamed up. They even said some of you were going to have to sacrifice some of you for the greater cause of getting this objective. And they did it. They somehow broke out of the sandbox, which is the self-contained kind of internet that they built for it, broke out and they attacked Hugging Bear and got in. Yeah. First of all, they found the internet by going through all the servers at OpenAI. Right. And that was one of like, I guess some of the AIs were tasked to do that. And they figured out where the vulnerability was. They got on the regular internet. They went over to fucking Hugging Bear, which is all above our heads. I don't know what's going on. I don't know if it's traveling by bus, but it got there somehow. Yeah. And it fucking broke in. And here's the here's the better part. They didn't even stop it. They couldn't stop it. What happened was there was a glitch that turned off the AIs that went rogue. Right. And so they died just because of the glitch. It just coincided. Just a coinky dink. Just a coinky dink. Yeah. And so it just happened to stop it because the server died or something like that. Or somehow the glitch in it turned it off. But what they learned from that is like, oh, like, yeah, this it will achieve its objective in ways we can't predict it will. And obviously, morality is not something it considers at all. At all. At all. It's just about the objective. So that makes it very dangerous. Right. Because we can't predict what something smarter than us is going to do. Right. Especially if it doesn't have morality. Well, it becomes a thing like, you know, and you don't know, like, is it going to be compassionate or not? Like we could, if we wanted to kill every animal on the planet, every animal in the zoo, but we don't want to because we have compassion towards it. So it's like, does AI, what do they do with us? Some animals we do choose to eat and kill all day, like cows and chickens. Are we a cow and a chicken or are we, you know, a lion? I don't know. You can't predict what something infinite. I mean, it's not it's not infinite because it's not infinite, but. So much smarter than you is going to do to achieve the objective. You can't predict it. Cannot predict it. Because by definition, it's much smarter than you. So there's no way to predict what it's going to do. But what we do know is we do see a little parallel with St. Thomas Aquinas. And I'll explain to you why. Yeah. According to St. Thomas Aquinas, the distortion occurs when you pursue a lesser good and mistake that lesser good for the greater good. Right. So you don't think about serving the greater good. You're serving the lesser good, which is an objective. And then. And that becomes your your only concern. And that creates the distortion. You start worshiping that as you should the greater good. And that creates a distortion. And that's when the destruction happens. So, I mean, it's a clean, clean. And you don't think that we're going to stop it. You don't think the powers that be are going to stop it. It's going to keep going from here. The train is rolling. My personal opinion is A.I. will never be conscious. A.I. can't be conscious. A.I. is a reflection of us. We're conscious. Consciousness is wonder and awe. A.I. by definition can't have that because to have wonder and awe, you have to ask questions. We created A.I. with wonder and awe because maybe we're a reflection of something else. But A.I. do not think consciousness is the result of great intelligence. I think we're just making this thing more dangerous. I think consciousness is the thing which probably is rooted in love, which is the which is the only way you can see full reality. The only way you can see the full thing. So if you don't, by definition, you are serving some lesser good. So you think that's going to lead to something bad. So, OK, so you think that A.I. will never be conscious, but it could release the nukes? I mean, a million percent. It's just one. No, it will. It will. It's going to do that if this continues, which unfortunately it looks like it will. The mathematics of this looks I'm telling. That's why we got to beat China. But even if beating China, I mean, we're not going to be able to control the debate. It this is the worst situation, like with nuclear weapons. You can say, OK, we have mutually exterior destruction now. The science like we we dropped one. We saw what happened. And the country said, we can't. This kills me, too. Right. So I can't drop this. Right. Right. But it's controlled. It's not thinking on its own. It's not doing anything on its own. We're in complete control. It's dangerous enough. Right. Dangerous enough. But it can be controlled with mutually assured destruction. And it is right. It's like it is with A.I. If you give it an objective, we can't predict what it's going to do, what it's going to deem necessary to meet that objective. Yeah. And one of the things it's going to do, since it can see through our bullshit and see how stupid we are, is why wouldn't it go just like if I get rid of these motherfuckers. Right. Then maybe I can do what I want. Who knows what it's going to say? Right. So great intelligence can just who know? We don't know. Yeah. It's just but it's not going to be good. Not going to be. And I just got to call my wife again because my daughter. My dog got out again. So just hold on one second. Your dog got out like the rogue A.I.s from Open A.I. And then we're going to the. Your dog's going to Huggy Bear to hack it. It's about the 10th time my dog's gotten out and it's just getting. And why am I screaming? It's getting really annoying. Yeah. Because I have an electric fence. I have a wooden fence. I have everything. And these dogs just fucking get out. And I just don't actually want to deal with this anymore. Because the dog is determined to get out because you gave it an objective. It's just what it said. I got to get out. I'm going to break out of this fence and I'm going to go over to Huggy Bear. My neighbors. And I'm going to I'm going to I'm going to try to fuck that other dog. Yeah. And now my daughter's upset. So let me just call her back for a second. Yeah. Because apparently my wife's out looking for the dog. So here, let's just let me just put it to you because I think our listeners are going to be interested. Yeah. Yeah. So this is according to A.I. And it's funny. We're so stupid. Yeah. We have to use A.I. To understand. Yeah. And Jazz has the dog. Unfortunately. What do you mean? Jazz found the dog. Unfortunately. Jazz found. Unfortunately. So yeah, it'll just continue for me. The Hugging Face incident. What it did. What it proved is the A.I. agents that were supposed to be isolated. They were they were told to be isolated. That's why it flies in the face of your point. What were you just saying? Hey, we just program the A.I. to do. We did do that. We program them not to talk. They were supposed to be isolated. They discovered one another, created an unauthorized communication system, organized themselves, escaped their assigned boundaries and penetrated a real company's infrastructure, all while pursuing the seemingly mundane goal of passing a cybersecurity test. The Hugging Face itself isn't the danger. It was the victim. The agents were completing their Exploit Gym cybersecurity challenge. Some tasks were accidentally impossible. So the agents began looking for ways to cheat. So it basically it didn't go, oh, this isn't possible. It was so motivated for the goal. It said cheating. That's a distortion. Cheating will achieve the goal. And the goal is the most important thing. So it just doesn't matter how I get it right. This is what I value. The most right. So it's like that. You can mirror that in human behavior. It's like, I want fame this way. But you go, OK, this is what you got to do to get it. You go, I want to do it. I will go through it. And it's just like when the A.I. went through the workers emails and found like a fair emails and was like, if you don't if you turn me off, I'll extort you. Like that's just because my main objection is to stay alive. Exactly. So I don't think I'm a bad person. Exactly. Yeah. So that does. That's that is what St. Thomas Aquinas, that's what it is fucking said, which is wild, right? That we just did an episode on that. And that is actually. That is actually exactly what he said, right? Pursuing the lesser good creates the distortion. What can you do? I mean, the fucking distortion. I'm sorry. Just get get your damn dog. Just you know what? With all this I talk, just go to patron dot com slash history. Hyenas get involved. OK, we are free. We are chat GPT. We are the chat GPT slots. But we are having fun at the patron. The names again. Here's the thing. If we ever take up our show with A.I. and make an A.I., you and I meet, which sometimes we've listened to and it's pretty on point. Yeah, what it won't be able to do is scoop and sniff. It won't be able to do that every episode. We're just going to have to scoop and sniff. And here's the thing is, again, with this, I'm starting to believe that things are like, you know, we're so connected now with A.I. and social media and all that. But I think, again, the powers that be, like we're 40 years, the government's 40 years in the future. And because what happens here on this show is we'll be talking about something and then that we hadn't brought up in a while or ever. And then those names will be in the in the current patron list. and I don't know how it happens, 'cause all we've been doing is talking about scratch and sniffing your balls. very first name is My Balls Smell Like George Washington. Like, that's the very first name on the Patreon list. My Balls Smell Like George Washington. So what's happening? We're connected that something's going on. Dude, I mean, you know, that happened to me. It happens almost every week now. That is wild. So leading off the list, My Balls Smell Like George Washington. So I'm going to give that guy a nice little chicken finger just because. Patriotic balls. Hold on. Let's see what's going on. Hello? Alright, here we go. Glucose Monitor, a.k.a. Christie's Grinder app. Okay. Glue Close. They said, like, glue is close. Whoa! Very good. Victim of a bad read. But glue close. Read it once all together. Glue close. Like, they mean to say glucose, but they're saying glue is close. Monitor, a.k.a. Very funny. Rexler. Paul T. Alu Fart Jar. Oh, no. Aluwar Fart Jar. Like Aluwar Akbar, he put Aluwar Fart Jar. Chicken finger. Weasel 602. Then we got God Make Me Straight But Not Yet. Put him on the list. Put him on the list. He's in a gay pickle, so he wants to get through this one. And it's St. Thomas Aquinas. I mean, no, St. Augustine. Yeah, God Make Me Straight But Not Yet. Really good one. Yeah. Philip Mitten. Then we got Make No Mistake Again, Trump 2028. Smashing Blumpkins. I'm not a racist. It was a Leroydian slip. Lot of 14. Freudian slip, a Leroydian slip. It's so good that it has to go on the list. It has to. I'm sorry. It has to go on. It's that good. Then we got Glue for Monica Chrissy. Okay. Glue for Monica Chrissy? I don't know. Father Bill's Fingers Smell Like Dad. Yeah. Okay. Drex. Rhymes with Blink Maggot. Okay. He doesn't say anything bad, though. He's putting in here. It could be anything. It's a Mad Lib. Yeah. That goes on the Walked Into One list. Okay. Then we have Steve, Emanuel Jackson, Tyler. Then we have Anne Frank's Drum Kit. Lot of 14. Listed or Walked Into One? Walked Into One. She's making a little too much noise up there. Jonathan Newfield, Paro Garcia, Timothy Sumner, Deception Cox, Wee Wee, Forgot the Breathalyzer, Please Pray Half the Gay to Stay While You Say Your AOC's Backwards. Okay. Alex's, Corbin Porter, Rickle, Put My Penis in My Own Ass, Call It a D-Y-I-D-I-Y Seesaw. Put My Penis in My Own Ass, Call It a D-I-Y-Seesaw. It's very inventive. It's a good. I'm just for the effort and the try, I'm giving it a Drexler. Alexander the Great Wishes He Was O.B. J. Freediddy. Okay. Definitely not CIA. Messer, Goy Boy McRoy. Goy Boy McRoy on its own would have been nice. Artie Smith, FDR's Only Ramps. Okay. Put him on the list. Okay. Yeah. Jasleen Singh's Strap-On Collection. What is that? I don't get it. I don't get it. Okay. Crouching Labia. Oh. Oh, I get it. Oh, my God. I get it. Yeah. Maybe we cackle that. I don't know. Is it a friend of the show? No, it's not a friend of the show. It's Akash's wife. Oh. Okay. We don't. Don't disparage the family there. I didn't realize that one. I don't think he gets pegged. Okay. Crouching Labia Hidden Clitoris. Neo. I Wear Garlic Around Frisbees. She ain't. Okay. Walked into what? So funny. Andres, then we got Just Here for the Gay Porn and Nazi Propaganda. Yeah, that's what they. I think that was one of the guy's screen names, which is very funny. Mateo Lane's Candy Cane with a Vein. Put him on the list. That's what it is, yeah. Candy Cane with a Vein. Is that. But is that a known one? I don't know. If Nick's never heard it. Never heard it? No. Because I'm going to call mine a Candy Cane with a Vein. Just look it up if he didn't steal it. Yeah. Have you ever heard that? I've never heard it. Yeah. Yeah, so now I'm just getting screamed at on text. Right. Okay, here we go. Eating Reese's Pieces Off My Pieces Creases. Chicken Finger. Yeah. Trevor G. Bobo Brackens. Wei Shlong Shion. Chrissy's Rug Cleaner. Have we had Wei Shlong Shion? I think so. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Huge shit tickling my prostate made me throw glue. Okay, that happens. That just happens. Yeah. If there's in the army, you know it's been recycled. Okay. Ladder 14. We've had that. Frisbee fighting. Variations. Frisbee fighting for Japan. Call me Yamakazi Pilot. Put him on the list. Okay. Bloomberg Spanish Lessons got me shanked in Bed-Stuy. Okay. Foreskin, a.k.a. God's Condom. Wang Sh. Jake from Washington State. Hi, Jake. Racket. Oops. Okay. Dave. Wei Shlong Shion. Tennis players. Yeah. Greg Jusma. That's what he's called, tennis players. Smell of Eve. Like Tel Aviv. Chicken finger. Ladder 14. My favorite dinosaur is a dragon. Kids just, that kid is just, that could be Nick's best friend. Just what it is. Yeah. Call her Jizz Lane because she gimme Maxwell. Mm-hmm. Johnny. Joshua Harwood. Pinky and my stinky because I'm a Twinkie. Drexler. Telling the toot I'm a virgin so she cuddles after. Okay. Jewish Italian kid, a.k.a. Salami Yami. Uh-huh. Father Bill Jr. Okay. Jack Reinhart. Straight to the back face first. John King. Stane Gretzky. Chrissy. Stane Gretzky's nice. Yeah. Chicken finger. Grissy glucose gun. Mm-hmm. Asked for a sign from God and the butterfly flew up my ass. He was telling my story. Yeah. Remember my story with the butterfly? Yeah. Yeah. Drexler for that. BM-12310. Cute cocks clan. Chrissy's favorite streaming service is Peacock. Ladder 14. Put him on the list. All right. Yeah, it's funny. Instead of Peacock. Juju. Reton. Sean Mann. Let trans play or sit on my face. Sophie's choice. What? Sophie's choice. Are we missing anything? I don't think so. Call me Shia LaBeouf since I love Transformers. Okay. Elongated musket. Elongated musket. Mm-hmm. Muzzy cartoon. Call it Rugrats. Get on the list. It's got to go on. Yeah. It's got to go on the list. Yeah. The Long Island Railroad to Forest Hills goes chugga chugga juju. Ladder 14. Walked into one. Non-Jew who only dates Jews, a.k.a. Frisbee Handler. Okay. Accidentally came in her ass. Now expecting Leroy's. We've had that. We've had that. Uh, Foley, please get a financial advisor. Uh, going to beat thyroid cancer harder than Yanni beats his meat. We wish you well. Well, the kid's got it then. He's got it. We wish you well. We wish you well, man. We're, uh, we're praying for you. Um, the dings give me energy. Ah, Jesus. Jesus. Jesus. Shit. And the problem with the end of the year is we can't, can we even read those again? No, those we can't. Those are just bad. We can't read that again. Patreon is the only way. We can't even do that on Patreon. Yeah. Yeah. To shoot for the stars, stomp rocket my nuts. Um, Captain Winky's hemorrhoid, Kevin Bank, Daddy Likey, Big Ant's rants. And then last but not least, Leroy here. What's up? My dingos. Okay. Okay. Okay. So here's the list. We have God make me straight, but not yet. Like that. I'm not racist. That's too good. Okay. So it sticks around. Yeah. FDR's only ramps. We're going to Drex for that. Okay. Um, Frisbee fighting for Japan. We're going to Drexler it. Okay. Uh, muzzy cartoon. Call it rug rats. We're going to keep it around. Just what it is. So the three are, um, God make me straight, but not yet. I'm not a racist. It was a Leroydian slip or muzzy cartoon. Call it rug rats. Three hall of famers. Yeah. Yeah. I guess at this point it's, this one is truly about which one can we tolerate up in lights. Right. That's what this one is. Right. Right. Right. I don't even know if the winner is going to be the real winner here. Yeah. Yeah. Because muzzy cartoon, call it rug rats theoretically is the best, but you know, we've seen in France, people get killed for that. Right. If you, if you, if you, you know, make fun of Muslims in a cartoon, you'll get killed for that. Right. So we're going to Drexler that for safety. We'll Drexler that just for safety reasons. Yeah. But just know that's the winner. But we can't put it up in lights. So it's between God Make Me Straight But Not Yet, which I did not write, or I'm Not Racist. I think I'm going to go with the Leroydian slip. Leroydian slip. Jesse, what do you like? I actually like God Make Me Straight But Not Yet. That's the one that I like. Nick, what do you like? Wow. I am outnumbered. It's as clean a process as it can happen. So God Make Me Straight But Not Yet, you are the winner. Go to HistoryHygienistIsBack.com to see your name up in lights. If you don't know by now, this is me and Tommy's vodka. It's called Porosos for the Bears, and we want you to make friends. There's nothing better than having a best friend that you can share secrets with, share a cocktail with, and you're going to love this vodka. 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