Wales w/ Joe List & Sarah Tollemache | You Be Trippin' with Ari Shaffir

Hey guys, welcome back to UB Trip and today we got a great episode, Saratolamash and Joe List back off their successful, trippy award-winning episode where they talked about Ecuador for best, most makes you want to go award. Joe List and Saratolamash are both hilarious, stand-up comments from the New York area for the time being anyway and they came on to talk about their trip to Wales and non-stand-up comedy trip and you guys will love it. Please subscribe wherever you're watching or listening. Help out the podcast by hitting that subscribe button. Why don't you? All right, let's start the episode. We're back. So yeah, it's been great. You guys both fucking killed it. Awesome. It was really fun. Yeah, you tried so hard. I did. That sounds like you failed. I don't mean like that. I didn't take it that way. Yeah, that's not what I meant. You had to really work hard in your story and it came out great. I didn't know work. I was thinking about working. Well yours was one of those where I was like, once I was like, hey, I'm going to shoot the show again. I was like, I can't wait to record that story. I didn't do anywhere. I didn't want to tell you. I didn't, I didn't record it. I didn't run it. I didn't try it. I just went. But I think, you know, looseness is good. I read a lot of this Rick Rubens shit at a different artist, different ways, different things, you know, man, I just went up there. I wanted to be authentic, real big J for his roast stuff. They were like, Hey, can we get the script with that? I don't really know it. And we saw his, his like friendly, finally wrote it out. He goes, Cheryl, under what is so black, she seems like and then just underlying. He goes, Oh, I'll figure that out later. Yeah. And that's like two days before he goes, I got to, I got to get a word. Yeah. But I just want to respond to the comments before they come. I do not shave my legs if you were the look closer. Wow. It looked like you shaved recently. Sarah's hairier than I am. I am. And also I feel like you're both disgusting in your own way. We are. Yeah. It's true. I think. Well, Sarah forgot Deodorant. I told Sarah, I'm like, you're not the kind of person that can forget Deodorant. No, I smell like soup. Let's get some Chinese food and blend in. Yeah. Run the music. All right, guys. Welcome home to America, United States of America. Thank you. It's your first time back in the podcast. Yeah. Together as a team since Ecuador. Oh, yeah. Ecuador, which is a great episode. And then today, this is like, so sometimes I do these when people like this happen like 10 years ago, 20 years ago, and then some it's like it just happened. You guys just got back. We did, but we're not talking about that strip. Oh, we're talking about different. Yeah, talking about whales. Remember? Yeah, I thought you went to whales this time. No. We went to whales like it was like years ago. So this is not an example of what I was talking about. You be tripping is no good with like baby travel. You're like, and then we found a playground. I do have a no resorts rule for this. No, no, Amsterdam, because Amsterdam is just the same store. I got two fucked up and wandered. All right, right. Resorts like, dude, this fuck I got a C-Doo. Well, we just had a crazy trip. It was we went to Scotland. We went to Glasgow, Edinburgh, London, Bristol, Dublin, Belfast. So it was fucking awesome and crazy. By the way, we learned this. You always ask advice for travel at the end of the show. We can do it up front. Here's a quick one. I bought two three hundred and fifty pound tickets for first-class train from Glasgow to London. Five hours? Yeah. They never at any point checked the tickets, zero tickets. Then on stage, I went, hey, no one's checked my tickets. And a guy goes, yeah, it's a hundred pound penalty if you don't have a ticket. So to ride a train with no ticket is a hundred pounds. If they catch you. And I bought a first, if they catch you, they didn't catch us. And I spent like 700 bucks on tickets that no one ever looked at. So the on the Lewis in Dublin, the little, it's called the Lewis, the Lewis throughout a snake. It's a tram that goes to the city. And that one, too, it's all honor system of tapping your card when you get off in your life. It's so funny to apply an honor system to a country of people who have none. Literally, my sibling was like, hey, it was like, oh, if you get caught, you play dumb American. But whoa, and then if you get caught twice by the same guy, you like, stop, you're paying the fine. But the fine is like worth like two tickets. You get off the train and then you scan. Like you're free. You're on the sidewalk and it goes, boom, it goes, thank you. And so I was doing it with a card with no money. So it just looked like I was doing something. That's like leaving a note on a car you hit. Yeah. And then like, sorry, I don't have money. But yeah, so I just donated $800 to the queen or whatever. That's good for the NHS. Well, this studio is really going to hold that in. Well, you can't even talk with with the studio. We said it smells like underneath tone. Marley in here, man. So Wales was pre-K pre-K pre-K pre-K. Yeah, that's not true. I was thinking COVID is not the opposite of pre-K. COVID starts with a K. I actually do, but I was worried too. No, Wales was $29. Go with $19. 2019. 2019. 2019. 2019. Because we were going on a trip every year. 2018 was Sarah's 40th. 30th. Uh-huh. And I took her to Paris because I'm a fucking hero and we went to the French Open and it was awesome. I remember that. And then 2019 was Wales and fun story. I feel like you'll appreciate not really a fun story, but a fun note. This was back when they still had Sky magazine or whatever. Remember that? Backer plans. Yeah. Yeah. It was like a little magazine, whatever. Yeah. So don't go on the back. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, I mean, advertisements for like the next place to go to somewhere in Spain or something. By the way, if you help getting there, United will help you. Yeah. It was like one of those. And Henry Phillips used to take them and Photoshop his face and put quotes. Because it would always have quotes of like, when I was flying and he did a funny thing that I don't really recall. So I shouldn't have brought it up. But there was a little thing being like, Wales is the secret place that no one ever went to. And I like a story of like, you came here for a weird reason. There's no like, oh, I've someone said this to that. And it was like a little blurb being like, no one goes to Wales. And it's fun. So I got in my head like, oh, we should go to Wales. Wow. I never heard of anyone going to Wales. It's so funny how it's like whatever it is that gets in your brain about a place. It got in your brain. You saw a TV show where they mentioned it when you were little. I get that way with music sometimes. Like I remember reading like the back of Spin magazine. It would be a blurb about an artist. I'm like, that sounds actually pretty cool. And you'd buy the CD and you're like, this is great. Yeah. The Rolling Stones list of like albums out that week. There's one two or three. And they rated it one to five. I remember Joshua Tree. They like, they gave it a five. They rarely give anything a five. I'm like, we'll check it out then. Yeah, really pretty solenovel. We're aging everybody here. I mean, yeah. I mean, I was looking at backlogs. Oh, I got and by the way, I got arrested. I tried to steal from the library. Anyway, yeah, that's you guys. But Wales. Yeah, it was like one of those things of like, I never really met anyone that went to Wales. It seemed like fun. Right now I want to go to Mallorca because that's where Rafa Madal is from. So he's like, oh, that's not Mallorca. Mallorca is the cooler one less, less people. Mallorca. There's Mallorca. Mallorca. I didn't know there's a Mallorca. It's like maybe a Mallorca, a majority. Yeah, it is like that. What the hell are yours? Yeah, the pussy lips. It's a Jewish holiday. Mallorca. That's the one you guys want to. No, no, we didn't. No, I didn't even know there's a Mallorca. Mallorca. I've never heard of this one. Let's go there. Go directions, Mallorca to Mallorca. Yeah, Mallorca. Let's see both of them out. That's an island. Look at the map. And what's what's Mallorca? Mallorca is a Spain. Yeah, it's also an island. It's where Rafa Nadal is from. Oh, right there. Okay. They're like friends. Yeah, they're buddies. They've got to be buddy or just serious enemies. They're like on a bike. It's like a little side car. Stay in here by. And I think Barcelona is. Mallorca, don't wander. Barcelona is on the mainland of Spain. Of course, but I'm saying I'm almost Barcelona. Barcelona is the place you go to get to these places. Absolutely. Look at that. It's a 14 hour walk from one island to the other. That way, Google map. You have to be on a ferry walking back and forth. That's funny. Are you using that? Yeah, Barcelona. There you go. See you fly to Barcelona. You have a second couple of dicks there and then you just shoot over to Mallorca. So you guys do this travel stuff together all the time? Were you doing this before you got wet or no? We had a child. Yeah, so we went to where we go. We went to, well, we didn't have money early on. Yeah, we got money. We got money and then we did two trips and then we had a kid. Yeah, we fucked up. No, then we did Ecuador. We did Ecuador. We did Ecuador. We did Ecuador. We did Ecuador. You see that episode. And we do a lot of last year. Now we have a kid. It's more domestic travel. Last year we did the entire month in New England, which was fucking awesome. That's cool. Guys, I need to present this to you. Oh, what is it? Thank you. This is heavier than I thought it was going to be. No, that was. That was some kind of speaking thing. I'll lift my leg and make a show of it. Open it up. Slide it open. It says list slash Sarah. Yeah. My name's just slides out. I see. Yeah. So every year, I have a list of awards for best episodes, best guests, best, uh, whatever. And this year, what do you have one from before? Best pictures? Best guy that didn't get laid on a trippy schedule. Yeah. Well, Dan, you're a two-time winner because you won most makes you most want to go. Wow. For Ecuador. Yeah. For Ecuador. Yeah, huh? Look at that. Sarah, you can have this. I already have one. You tried to go away. Sarah has no sentimentality. Sentimentality. Our proof player and volleyball seventh grade. Come on, dude. Our therapist is 304 years old. Yeah. He wrote us a handwritten note being like, you're going to be great parents. Congratulations. It's the adventure of a lifetime. I can't imagine two better parents love with all my love and heart. Alan? and Sarah crumpled it up the other day to make things. You didn't crumple. - I didn't crumple. - You started to crumple this fold, isn't it? - You said, are you gonna throw that away? - You had folded. I'll show you the fold. That's how I knew you were throwing it away. - So what's our most, did people really reach on be like, we wanna go to Ecuador? - Yeah, well also, - You can also like seriously kill somebody with this. - Or throw it through a windshield. - Throw it through a butt. - Yeah, I was thinking of pussy. - But right here, this part. - If that's not done. Why don't you punch yourself? - We go this way. - You're still saying that. - Why do you go this way? - Sarah turn it around. - That's sharp. - I love this now. That's my new thing. - Thank you very much. - Yeah, Niana, listen to it. And she was like halfway through the episode, like cataloging everything and doing all the timestamps. And she was like, I mean, I gotta go to Ecuador. - That was great. - Yeah, that was awesome. - Yeah, I think South America gets a bad rap of being racially dangerous. - Do you know what I mean or like the idea of like you're gonna get mugged? - Almost more so than like going to Africa. - Yeah, and I'm a witch, so they'll burn me. I'm a gay witch. It's really dangerous for me. - Super. - Yeah, so anyway, congrats. - Thank you. - So yeah, Wales, we went in 2019 and we fucked up. We did a couple of things that we fucked up. - I love this, 'cause you should show some regrets when you travel. I wish I had done this, but still had a great time, but wish I had done this. - Well, here's where we fucked up and we could jump all over the place here. - Yes. - So we first, we went to London and we did show, 'cause it's nice as a comedian, you can make money for the trip by performing. - Yeah. - So we went to London and I did a show, which was awesome, and Sarah ran around doing shows, doing-- - It was a top secret, but it was great. - And you make a bunch of rules. - And you make a bunch of money there, too. - Yeah, that's it. - Slopped my hand with a fistful of cash. - It's a fistful of cash. Like you could beat off a mugger with this. - It was more than I thought it was gonna be, but less than to claim. - Yeah. - Less than what? - To claim. - You wouldn't tell the states about you. - Yeah, you could get away with not it. - Yeah. - But anyway, so we went to London for a few days, which is also awesome. And then I had planned this whale strip, which I was excited about, and it was gonna be a hiking trip and beautiful. And part of my motivation, by the way, I came out here, did the Peru. I had that Peru trip that was insane, and I was like, I can't have the best trip of my life with my ex-girlfriend. - It was some skank. - So I was like, we gotta do a fucking hiking trip that's gonna be the trip of all trips. So we planned the trip and you're like this, I think. I love a trip that hiking is the thing. - Yeah, it's so fun. - That's what we're doing. - I was living in your footsteps on the Salkantai Trail. - Salkantai Trail, which I couldn't believe. You didn't call it. - Far more built up than when you did it. - Right. I did it. We were like the only ones on the trail. - I know, the tents, it was like, no, it lodges, and like, - That sucks. - Yeah, you did it. - Yeah, it got to lived out. - It did, yes, it was like, there was nobody. There was no, I told you the story, I think, on the pod. Like, there was like a kid in the tree going, "Gringo's, Gringo's!" It wasn't sad. It was like, it called the Edward. I still haven't recovered. - You did it at the right time. - But anyways, so I was like, we gotta fucking top that. So we were going to Wales and, you know, you're like, Sarah was like, okay, that sounds good. She's a very go with the flow, and I'm like, don't worry, it's gonna be a stir. - If I was on a dating side, it'd be like, I like to travel, but I don't, I'm not the planner. - I will plan if there's no one else doing it. - Okay, so it's fun to travel with somebody because each one could take on roles. - Right. - I'm always like, I don't know, tell me what we're doing. Like, I'm on with Morris here, so I'm just like, tell me what we're doing. - Right. - If you're the one that's like, this is what you're wanting to do, then I'll go, I'll do it. - I'm sure it's right. - Yeah. - Yeah. - So we booked the trip. So then, what a different hike in Wales than over the giant pass of 40 to 600 meters. - Yeah, yeah. It was a totally different kind of thing, but it was so fucking spectacular there. So we fly to London, we do the shows, then we took the train to Cardiff, which is like the capital of Wales. - Yeah, it's the first place we went to. - So we went there, from London, to Cardiff. - And I like broke down crying the first night. - I will say why? - It's a Sunday, we went there on a Sunday. - We went to Cardiff on a Sunday, and I was like, here we go, Wales, baby. Well, I get emotional when I travel anyways, and I'm a little gay, so we get there, and we walked around Cardiff, and it was just like - It's just a city. - The most whatever, just kind of like, in respect to Cardiff people. - It does have history only because it's on an island that Romans went to. - It was a castle. - Yeah. - And we found a pub that was just kind of like sad food. - It was like a quiet. - It was the first time we learned that the side dish for fish and chips is smushy peas. I like peas, but there's something depressing about peas as a side dish. But they are making a comeback in my life. - Peas? Oh, 'cause you're a kid. - I think, yeah, they love peas. - Peas of mine. - But I am actually like, they're pretty good 'cause they're sweet and they go with anything. - Yeah. - Do you guys have rare bit? - No. - We just had a lot of fish and chips. - No, rare bit. Look at rare bit. - I think it's called rabbit, it's an animal. - I don't think it is. - Okay. - I think it's their dish. - No, we didn't have rare bit. We had fish and chips a lot. - Welsh rare bit. - Oh, what is that? - Right, I don't know. - I don't know. - It tastes like a toasted sandwich. - Welsh rare bit is a savory, cheesy dish of melted cheese sauce served over toasted pizza. - Right there. - I should have had it. - It's Welsh pizza. - A fancy cheese on toast. Hi guys, it's time to break in and interrupt today's podcast. Tell you about the guests. Joe List and Sarah Tollamash. They're both hilarious stand-up comics and two of my best friends in the world. They've come to visit me when I was in Ecuador. Actually, they're making the return trip from a trip to the award-winning episode of most makes you want to go on the trip to Ecuador to visit me. Mendovali and keto. Sarah Tollamash is a great comic. I'll start with her. I know there's a stereotype out there that women aren't funny. That's antiquated. That was around when I was starting comedy 48 years ago. And since then, women have entered into the open-mic scene and now become middlers and then headliners and then national headliners at an alarmingly high rate. And if you're looking for a female to appreciate, look no further than Sarah Tollamash. She's great, legitimate. She's great. It's a rebel, funny, low energy in a way that's really cutting your leverage. She's got two specials right now out on YouTube called Butthole Money and Voluptuous Boy. She's also on tour. She's at this weekend at Soul Joel's in Pots Town. Go to saratikomedy.com to get a ticket for the show. Follow her also on youtube at youtube.com/seratollamashcomedy or on Instagram @stollamash. Joel List, one of my best friends, legitimately one of the greatest comics in the world right now. I make jokes between them and the family. They share one child and one chin. But all jokes aside, Joel List is hilarious. He's at the top of his game right now. It has been quite some time. And if you've been sleeping on Joel List, you're an idiot. He's great. His Instagram is Instagram.com/Joel List Comedy, YouTube. YouTube.com/Joel List Comedy. He's got specials called enough for everybody. This year's material and I hate myself. All three, some of the best specials you'll ever see. Shock full of jokes. He's also got two podcast, two of his stories and the regs. He's also on the road. You can find all those tour dates at comedianJoelList.com. He's in Tacoma, Portland, St. Louis, Austin, Royal Oak, Michigan, Seabrop, New Hampshire, Rochester, New York, Tampa, Philadelphia, Raleigh, and Kansas City. Also, both Joel List and Sarah Tollamash on separate episodes of my hit television show, The End. You might know it is. This is not happening. It's got no relation to that show at all. Get an episode right now for $5.99 sets. Get both episodes for $12 or $11.98. And as long as you're getting two, may as well get three more and get five more. You get two for free if you buy five. That's right. Every episode for just $29.99, The End. Available at rysphere.com. Please watch-- please subscribe if you're watching or listening, guys. Help support the show by hitting subscribe and leaving a comment for the algorithm. Why not do it for once? Leave a comment, talk about stuff. If you've been or where you want to go, the comment section is ripe with people giving advice on where to go and things to do. If you've been to Wales, absolutely way in, give some tips on Wales. So as people listen to this episode or watch this episode, go to the comment section and they go, "What kind of trip can I make?" And you guys will help them out by seeing some fun shit yourself. That's it, guys. Also, I have a special out right now called Jew. It's available on youtube.com/rysphere. Please subscribe there. I've got three specials on Netflix, double negative, America's sweetheart, and Jew. That's it. Let's get back to the episode to Wales. All right. Wales, this is something I find fast about. Great Britain. Yeah. You go over there and you're like, they're all the same. And then you go over to Wales and you're like, what the fuck is this language? Well, it's almost like-- You're like, is this another country? I'm so stupid when you're like, is this another country or is it just, it's not like Scotland or Scotland? No, it's like Scotland. I don't really understand Great Britain at all. I don't know what United Kingdom is. It's different from Great Britain now. It's down in a country, but UK is also a country that knows both of them. UK is not a country. There's Northern Ireland. It's like New England. It's like a region. It's a thing. The crown, it's the empire. The Great Britain is the United Kingdom. It's Great Britain. Great Britain is the United Kingdom. They're you from-- That's the same. That's the same. I thought they were different. I did. You're wrong. Great Britain and the United Kingdom are the same thing. It's made up of England, Scotland, Northern Ireland, Wales. Did I miss one? That's gotta be it. England, Scotland, Northern Ireland. Great Britain is the only way. Yeah. Same thing. United Kingdom is a sovereign political state. Whereas Great Britain is a geographical island. - So Great Britain is. - All right, it's only an island. - It's only an island. - Oh, so Northern Ireland isn't part of Great Britain, but it is the United Kingdom. Well, I'm a big asshole. - But then there's like the Jersey Islands where they do offshore accounts, which is they're equivalent of. - Genieva, Switzerland, yeah. - So wait, that's all. - Or came in islands. - Wait, what's the one? - Okay, this is. - Hey. - So Ireland is it's an island, but then Northern Ireland is good. That's the craziest part. - Great Britain is just Scotland, England, Wales. - But the United Kingdom is all the shit, except Ireland is not part of it, but Northern Ireland is. They had some troubles over there. - Oh, yeah, I've heard about that. - The troubles, yeah, they say they're troubles. - So it is confusing, but you don't need a passport for any of, meaning you're not going overboard or patrol or anything like that. - No, you don't even need a ticket as it turns out. - Wales is not an island, is it? - It's on the island. - It's on the Great Britain, it's the East. - Okay, so you're in this dumb fuck city. - So we call it the Cardiff. We walk around, we go to a pub, we have the most whatever food. We're just like this. - It's closed. - I'm like, what is, everything's. - Everything's closed on. - Yeah, everything's closed at shitty. There was some castle we went to. I was like, all right, we'll buy a ticket for the castle. The castle feels like it was built in a mall. It was just whatever. It was like letting you go. - It was very, like, it felt really and it sounds festival to me. Like, just because it was probably their only touristy thing that they offered. - It was just a sad. - And it was also a day of like. This is just an observation and nothing. Like, I have any disdain or an opinion about this, but it was just like a ton of farcey there. - No way, really? - At this castle. So it must have been like, it was a huge, it must have been like a holiday for them and that was the one place that we were gonna go to to celebrate. 'Cause it was a big celebration there. - Now the one fun thing we did see. - That's cool, it's on a little hill. - It was on a moat. Tested with a moat? That's fucking rules. - Yeah, remote dude. - This is it. We watched her on that Parliament-y little building, but the coolest thing we saw was there was a bird guy. One of these hawk men and he lost his bird. - No. - It went a wall and he had to climb up a wall and he kind of like fell and. - He's straight. - He was like, with blood on it. - We have photos of that somewhere. I'll find the photos. - Yeah, and he was like trying to be funny. He was like a Scottish, funny guy. - He's just gone away. - He's just a little weird. - And he turned his ankle and then he was trying to climb up and little rocks were falling. He kept like, skidding down. And we were like, now we're talking. - Yeah. - And his fucking little eagle bird hawk thing was flying around. - It's not having it that day with his bird. - So that was fun. But in general, it just felt like, what are we doing here? And you know, you have a motion and I'm like, I fucked up, I'm a piece of shit. I didn't do it. - But. - It's cool though, 'cause there are things that I like about stuff like this is like, you're touching a wall that Romans built, that people were back in like 10. - That shit is pretty cool. It's not even like they've rebuilt it. It's the same stones. - It's the same stone. - Yeah, that's amazing to me. - Yeah. - What was I just gonna say, fuck? - Cardifical. - We're the best. - We're the best. Oh, obviously the best guest. Two-time trippy or winner, first time trippy or winner. So we're one of those authentic, what's it called, sweaters with the buttons? - Cardigan? - Cardifigan. - You're serious. - That's good stuff. - I feel like I shouldn't be. - Cardiff. - That's good. That's good. - Marty would like that. - I think I know why the room stinks. - That's my corny jokes. - It's a little modern corn. - Look at my legs, my god. I really think you shave like, oh yeah, I got a wedding next week. I gotta shave them again. - Yeah, I bright like a dime on them, but look at this. - So you're in. - It's in steel and sex appeal. - You're in cardiff. - You're like, this blows. How long were you there for? - Just like two days or a day and a half. I was really upset. I was like, I failed. I don't know what I'm doing. I'm such an idiot. - Part of it, I'm like, there's never a one moment that I was like, why did you take me to this piece to shit place? - You didn't, but you felt responsible. - Yeah, you just feel like, oh my god, this is crazy. - Whenever you're the person in charge of planning it, if it doesn't go perfect, like fuck, everybody hates me. - It's like when you choose a restaurant and then everyone gets like diarrhea. (laughing) - Yeah, it's like, sorry. - Now let me ask you, can we each side note real quick? - Go back to the thing I wanna see this video of these people, yes, side note. Yeah, these two, let's see them. Oh, this is maybe a nice little video. - Yeah, see, it looks like this. That might have been us. - Yeah, that's me. - Yeah, wow, we did everything. - We did verbal editing, really? - Yeah, we did all this stuff. And it was just kinda like, all right, I guess, whatever. - Why are they trying to squeeze all this into 18 seconds? It's nuts how fast they're going in this video. And then sometimes they hold for no reason? - I don't think that's the end of the video. - Yeah, it is. (laughing) - Now, I would love to get, this is sort of like a philosophical question. I would love to get your Phyllis Diller softical question. - Okay. - I would love to get your thoughts on this. 'Cause for one time, we're in Marfa, Texas with Sarah and her mother and her sister. And her sister's the planner person when it comes there. She sets up a thing to go see this art installation. - It's a known art installation where it's these big stone. It's like Stonehenge but gay. - But it kinda looks like concrete that you would see if they were doing road construction and then we'll get to that later. We need to just store these here. - So she buys the tickets, we go. And Sarah's mother who likes the arts and is very smart person, a consumer of art. She hates it. And the whole time she's like, this sucks, this isn't art, this is bullshit. - Well, I felt like she was mainly trying to be funny but it just came off. - But she disliked it. - Yeah, she didn't. - The point is. - She wasn't impressed. - Her sister booked this thing to go see art and then her mother hated the art but then her sister was getting upset. Like, I'm sorry, you don't like it. Some of it's good, I like it. Who's right? Is it rude to hate? If I pick a movie and you hate it, should I be offended? Or should you just be nice about the art, even though you don't like the art? - I mean, okay, I'll weigh in. This is Philly's. - Please. - This is Diller. - I think there's a level. - I think it's like, keep your mouth shut 'til it's done. Don't ruin the event. Or just go, oh, actually I got to the restroom and go outside. (birds chirping) (water running) - The Burt Christchurch Dillens by Free Waters. Wherever you go, there they are. - I've been to art shows with a cousin where they're like, I got arted out. Like, where's Jeff? Like, I got arted out. It was about 30 minutes I was done. So I just waited outside for you guys. - Right. - We were like that at the Guinness factory. - I'm done, you guys don't need to drink. - Oh, right. - And it was just like three ingredients. So they had to, it just looked like at an intense PowerPoint presentation for like three ingredients. - It sucked ass. They'd like show you the barley. They're like, here's the barley. - Everyone says you have to do the Guinness factory. - It sucked. - Everybody says it. But I have Guinness where I live. - And the lookout deck was great. And I think if you cared about learning how to pour, but I've already bartended, so I know how to pour a Guinness. - Oh, stupid. (laughing) It's so stupid. Like, we use water and they show water falling. I'm like, get out of here. This is gay. But anyway, so-- - The building's cool. - I don't know. Where do you come down on that? If you, like-- - I think you gotta be like, hey, no. You weigh in ahead of time, go, I have no interest in doing that. I hate that stuff. - Well, she was interested though. She likes art, but she hated this specific art, but then her sister was taking it first. - No, 'cause then you're blaming the sister. Especially once you see the sister getting upset, she'll go, hey, no, I'm just joking. It's fine. It's fine. I was just fucking around, man, I'm sorry. - Yeah, I was very interested. - Thank you for doing all the planning. That's why you do all this work, and then somebody's shitting on your wallet, it's like, oh, but then, I don't know, man. - Yeah. - But then sometimes people plan all this work, and you're like, yeah, I hate this. None of us wanted to do this. You forced us into this thing, then we all pretty much expressed what you didn't want to do. - Right, but this is specifically about the art though, 'cause it's like, I felt like your mother was like, yeah, I know, I'm fine, having fun. I just think this art sucks, and then her sister was taking it personally. But it was like, one of those things were like, you're both-- - Wrong and right. - Yeah, you're both right and wrong at the same time. It's like Northern Ireland. - You're handling it wrong. - You both have, yeah. - My best bet is, don't complain, don't explain. - Yeah, it's like Ireland, I get your upset about being colonized, but don't take it out on the people that are just trying to, like, not litter. - Yeah, you don't blow up a four-year-old. - Yeah. - Well, that is troubling. - That was serious trouble. - Loose enough. - But anyway, so then-- - People already look like a potato. - The next day, we went to-- first of all, it's also weird, because you're in Cardiff and you go to, like, Hurtz. So when you go to rent a car in a foreign country, you're just, like, at the shitty Hurtz Decks. - Yeah. - You know, like, do we have until you're on a camera trip? - You should be, like, the equivalent of-- - I try to go to Europe car because I feel like I'm traveling. - Right, well, we go to Europe car, it goes here. - I'm Mercedes. - We go Mercedes. - So then this is the other thing. So, Louie, our wonderful friend, Louie. - People always talk about what a genius he is, but he has his moments of not so genius. But he was like, you cannot rent a car, you will die. I have a friend that hit a guy, you're nuts, it's impossible, you're crazy. And so I'm like in my head being like, can I not drive on the other side of the road? - Fear's really ruined stuff. You know what I mean? And then you're doing, you're like, oh, you're pussy. - I forgot, you're in my heart. - But they get in your head sometimes. - Yes. - And you know why I heard that was the guy who just got in. I'm like, yeah, right, is it higher or lower than anywhere else? - Than the standard people that get in a car accident. - Right. - Have you broke it down by foreigners driving on the other side of the road? Or wrong side by the way? - Yeah, and I will say, it is scary for numerous reasons. - Roundabouts. - Roundabouts. - I do like, but when you're first going approaching, you're like, oh, no. - I was just a GC, I'm like, you got to be like, am I in the right, if I'm out in the right lane, I try to turn, and then, yeah. - Yeah, and you're like, we live here now. - I went to the car in Edinburgh, and when she just went north for a while by myself after the fringe, and it was like, around about, I just decided, like, wherever the car in front of me goes, I'm going. - I'll figure it out for that. - I'll make it turn. - There's so many wrongs. (laughing) - I can't, I can't, I can't be thinking of my own here. I've been almost hit by a bus so many times, walking this way. Like, bro, fuck, fuck. - Yeah, yeah, there's that. - So that was part of it was, we're in our head, being like, okay, this is crazy. Louis, they were going to die. He's the genius, we're fucked. So, but then, Sarah's father gave us a good piece of advice, and here's more travel advice. - Okay. - The driver is always in the middle of the road. - Yeah. - Here, you're on the left side of the street, left side of the car. - We're doing the logic of it. When you're like, okay, we're going to take a right. Remember, you're in the middle of the road. - Yeah, you stay in the middle. And the other advice I have is, you have to have, at least one passenger fully present and involved in the driving. - You're going the wrong way. - Yeah, she can't be on her phone. - You're like, okay, we're about to hit around about. - Yeah, we're in the bushes. Which, a few times, it was hard for me to get used to more car being over there. So, Sarah would be like, just heads up, we're just totally in the bushes. - It did feel like we were about to do a clueless, the movie clueless, just completely. - No, take out the cars, the freeway. - One stop, because you lost your virginity after that. It was such a good scene. - Great film. - I was just with Big J, and he was texting about something on the way, and I see him, in like whatever suburbs. And just fading out, and then a bus was coming. Like a school bus, and I was like, the car. He's like, what? Like, the yellow bus, bus, bus. - You're like, what? - I'm like, bus, though. And he's like, oh, thanks. - Well, like $25,000 pyramid. - Right, the point is, in your lane, death. - It drives kids. (laughing) - Okay, okay. In the back, one lady, the one lady was in the front, and that was like a big thing. - It was a virgin, yeah. (laughing) But anyways, yeah, first time you figured someone, what? Bus. (laughing) Anyway, so we got the car, and then once we were cruzant, now you have the thing that's great about travel, is you have that thought of, we're doing it. We're fucking doing it, man. - And we get around about, and we fucking nailed it. - We nailed it. - Confident builder. We're like, now we're like, you know, we're in it, we're feeling it. - Yeah. - Yeah, so we're living for it. (laughing) - So we're going to the National Park, which I forget, the name of the city, and maybe you can pull this up, it's called Bootsie Coed, which is pronounced B-E-W-T-S, space-why. - We didn't, there was at one point with the language, and just the naming of stuff. We threw all care and respect out the window, and just pronounced it the way we wanted it. (laughing) - It's right at Bootsie. - No, no, it's B-E-W-T-S, and then do space, the letter-why. - E, which is the end of it, yeah. - So we called it Bootsie Coed. - I think we were calling it Bootsie Co-In, but it's pronounced. - But it's pronounced. - Y is an R, it's like R R. - Is it W in between the T and the S? - But the W is a V, isn't it? - Or you know, the W is a U. - The Y is a K in Coed. - How is it pronounced? - Yeah, do it pronounced on that. - It's like, Bootsie Coed, it's retarded. I mean, there are retards. - Do we have a pronounced thing? - Beto's a Coed. - Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, slow down, hold on, give me a count to three, two. - Beto's a Coed. - Beto's a Coed. - Beto's a Coed. - Yeah, maybe it wasn't as crazy as I thought. - Beto's a Coed. One more time, one more time. - It's like nailed it, it's dead on. - Beto's a Coed. - Beto's a Coed. - Beto's a Coed, I like that better. - Beto's a Coed. - It's the wrong, Wales is wrong on this. - 'Cause when language, you're so used to our rhythm with the way that you speak English, and so when you go to another country with a language like that, you're using their alphabet. You're like, it doesn't know how I would say it. - Right, and then there was another place called Dallegu, which was D-A-L-L-E-G-E-A-U, or something like that, but we called it Dallegu the whole time. - Yeah, one of these people got what that. - Here we go, Dallegu. - Yeah, so the way we pick the trip, I just went and looked at the National Park, and literally just went into the town, there was a town in there in Google Maps, and I was like, all right, Bootsie Code. This is a town, we'll find it. So I looked up Bed and Breakfast Bootsie Code. I went all just map, great Dylan line, using ideas as my maps. So I pushed in and was like, okay, Bootsie Code is a town, decently in the middle of the National Park. So I found a Bed and Breakfast. This is another funny thing. I wasn't thinking Bed and Breakfast is like a guy that owns a house that he cooks breakfast in. So we would just stop it off, take in photos. - Oh my God, come and tease. - And then we got a call from like a wacky Wales number, and this guy's like, hello, what time will you be arriving? It was like quarter and six, he's like, I have to go to bed. This is my home, and we were like, oh shit, so we had to speed up. - David's David. - David, yeah, I think Sarah was in love with him. - No, well, I only think he was so nice to us, and I always feel like when Joe's on trips or anywhere, he racks up a lot of father figures. - Yeah. - And I felt like with this guy's, how nice he was, I was like, uh, I just found a father figure. - Well, he was very kind and he took us around, it was like a classic Bed and Breakfast. Like he was like a whole. - Yeah, I saw it in a scholarly, and it was like, these are so much different. - It was fucking awesome, and he took us around, and look at it. - It was a really great place. - It was the best room I've ever had. It was so spacious. We had windows and either side with the brook. Literally, you could hear like a babbling brook. And then, this is our first hilarious thing that happened. We went to breakfast, Sarah, at that time before the kid, Sarah, it was a, she stays up late and sleeps late. - Yeah. - It's like, she's like a heroin addict. - It's bad. - It's bad. - I'd be going about like 2 a.m., and she would be starting a film. Literally, and like, three o'clock. - Like the ring. - She's like, "I'm gonna watch Lord of the Rings." - She's the only mom that's like, "Sacrus won't be down." I still do nothing of my life, but it's not gonna slow me down on that endeavor. So for most of our relationship, I would go out and live my life and come back and wake up, Sarah. So I came down for breakfast, best breakfast. Europe has fucking crazy scrambled eggs. They're like wet and like milky. - Your game breakfast was the best. - And hotel European breakfasts are my favorite. - And it had salmon on it. - Whatever that is, scrambled eggs with salmon and toast. It was fucking, it was nuts. And it was me and a bunch of old British people with RT and everything. And I was like, "I gotta get, Sarah here." And it went till like nine a.m. or whatever. So I was like, "I gotta leave." And as I was leaving the old lady went, he's going to Rouse his wife, which was fun. And I was like, "Sarah, you gotta get down here for the breakfast." And she's like, "Fuck you, I'll get duck and doughnuts." Or whatever. And I was like, "Fuck it, you're personally insulting them." (laughing) - Well, I got the point. We like, I need to show up. - He makes like eight dishes for the eight people. - And he's running, David's running the kitchen. He's sweating, he's taking orders, he's answering the phone. - He sure does. The sweat is built up in his chest here. - And his hair is just getting wet. - Hi guys, this message is brought to you by Raycon. Guys, the summer he got you down. Doesn't that look at this? Can you see the sweat on my forehead? On my brow? Can you see it? (sighs) It's not supposed to be like that here. I came for the coolness. You didn't get any of it. Well, to stay cool, I had to listen to songs about London, specifically L.D.Anne on repeat from L.D.Anne. And the best way to do that is ear buds by Raycon. Oh, Raycon's everyday ear buds, classic is packed with upgrades. You've got active noise cancellations, so you don't hear the craziness around you. It's best for the big cities. Or, if a bear is chasing you in the woods, and you wanna have your last moment in peace, noise cancellation can do that for you too. Multi-point connectivity so you can pair with two devices at once. Oh, that's actually really really big. 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The everyday ear bud classics are a great option for everyday listening. Go to buyraycon.com/chippin to get 20% off. Thanks to Raycon for sponsoring. Hey guys, today's episode of "Evary Chippin" is brought to you by Mudwater. Guys, last time I was in Australia, and I'm sad to say the Maroons lost in Game 3. They should have won Game 1 and Game 2. Last time I was on Australia, I built my whole tour around the state of origin, and the maroon's won that game in Sydney, take it to you. But when I got there, when I got to Australia, I wanted a flat white tour of the city of Melbourne. I drank eight flat whites, and I was jacked, and never recovered. I had jet lag, and I had so many flat whites that I stayed up for three days. I had a new type of jet lag, because I've never been discovered before in humanity. What I should have done was drinking mud water. Mudwater White has 1/7th the caffeine of coffee. Yeah, 1/7th. 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If you're just not off with code "trippin" it, m-u-d-w-t-r.com. After you purchase it, I'm going to ask you how you found out about them. Please show your support. Let them know. That I sent you. So Sarah comes down. How good was the breakfast? Tell them about the breakfast. That's really good. There you go. I love a bap. A bap? A Scottish or British breakfast. A British? Yeah. I like a English breakfast. You got the beans? I like faffinous, mushrooms. Sausage mushrooms. Mushrooms. Baking. Bring up a fucking Welsh breakfast. They all name whatever their name is. It's the same thing. And you're like, guys. There's no differences. No, what did we do? Oh, yeah. Maybe a blood sausage in Scotland. Yeah. A haggis. It was fucked up. Haggis is great. Okay. It's the sausages that I love there. I don't feel like you can get sausages like that here. Yeah. And look at that type of-- I like that kind of bacon. Oh, it was fucking good. It was so good. Yeah. And so we went there. And then the evening, the night before, we're going to go for an evening hike. Because you get there, and you're like, we just got a hike. What's the stuff in the middle? It's probably haggis. That's haggis. That's a wealth. I tried it again and I didn't think it was that bad. I liked it. Yeah. It's just a little dry. It needs something on it. Some sauce. Brown sauce. So yeah. I got some brown sauce. Or some egg yolk. Dip that in egg yolk. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Crack it on there. Yeah. Get your good. So this was great. And then we're going to do the big crazy hike. And we're like, what's the crazy hike? How long we talking about? I think like a four hours. Yeah. With different terrain. A little bit. Yeah. Yeah. So I was like, we're going to go hike around the town. And there's one of these picturesque towns where there's like a, I mean, you should probably find a photo. It's like in a BBC show of just like quiet crimes are getting solved. Stone bridge. An antique dealer is solving crimes in this town. Waterfall. Rapids. Stone bridge. Look at Bootsie co-ed bridge, whatever the fuck into that my two Welsh listeners are like, stop that fucking it's obvious. It's not that. Yeah. Give me Bootsie co-ed stone bridge. And we go out. And now this was a, this was, this was huge. The guy, David. That is. Wasn't it? No. That's just like a bridge. But maybe that is, maybe I'm changing it in my mind. Yeah. We did walk over that bridge. I think there's another one. That doesn't work. This was looking. Look at better. Look at better. Bootsie co-ed bridge. Fucking perfect. But anyways. So he's like, yeah, there's a golf course over there. He's like, there's a gate that says do not enter. Open it. He's like, they put that. What? They put, that's the bridge right there. He found it. Well, you're fucking good. Which one? Where? The one on the left there. Pontipair. Pontipair bridge. Yeah. See the stone. Yeah, and the picture right there. There it is. And our house was like fucking right there. Might be that one. Wow. That is so like yield. Yeah. It was fucking tremendous. Oh my god. I want to go back. But it did have the feeling like if you're not in my dark vampires are coming into town. Like everybody's like shutting down and everything shuts down. Yeah. That was the best place I've ever been in my life. So hard being in New York and then going like, where can I eat? It's like, no. Yeah. And then you are the driest hamburgers of your life. Go up that street. You probably find it. The photos of it in my fucking pocket. This one too. I can't zoom up. I was cutting him. You got to cutting him? I bought my boots there that I still have. Wait guys, hold on. Let me see cutting him. I still have my boots for that. And today's episode of Ubuntu is brought to you by cutting him. If you're looking for boots last minute while you're in boots. Bootsie, go ahead. Bootsie, go ahead. Look no further than cutting him. Boots. We'll get you a boot. And we'll find out what your British size is compared to your dumb American size. I also bought him sheep. We support you. We bought a sheep there that we love. We bought a sheep. That I kind of like shit on. What? It was like a. A little torsie sheep that says wails and his little legs dangle. Yeah. He's got a weighted bottom so you can see them. There I am. Go back up. One more block. You're going to be at our place. We're on the corner of this street. Go up there. Keep going. To the right. I think. Yeah. Oh wait. Go back to the left. Go back to the left. That's our house. We're up there. Straight up. Yes. Let's go. That place. That's it. Man, you're fucking zoom in. That's it. That's when we had breakfast in that porch. You can get up here. Oh. That's the breakfast spot. I can't believe this. Wow. It was fucking awesome. And the trail leaves from right there. Yeah. Oh really? The big one. Yeah. The big one. So I'm all over the place. So the first day we went in the big high. Like you go right down there? Yeah. We got lost. Do we do like one where we thought we started and then we went back onto the street again and we're like, whoops. That's the story I'm telling. Okay. We actually got lost because it was so egregious how close we were to the trail. He was like, you go out here and then you'll go that and I was like, we did like a full lap around the block because I'm like, we got to, I can't find it. We were just on it. It was like right there. But the first. I love it a guy. He's like, it's there. Like I looked everywhere. Like you. It's I live here. It's obviously there. It's crazy that you found this on Google map. Go up to the front. Go up that street. I feel like an old boomer. But that's amazing. It's fun. You stay there. But the first day he's like, yeah, there's a big sign on the golf course. It says private. Do not enter. He's like, open the gate. He's like, that's illegal. They have right to roam. Right to roam. He's like, you can walk anywhere you want. The sign is just there and he's like, I'm telling you to open it because you can open it. That's illegal to say right to her. So I know all the other. I guess I was driving in Ireland, maybe in Scotland too, but on the cow fences of these steps on other side. We had that. Step over and go. That's like, you're going to roam. Yes. Let me help you out. So it's somebody. America. No. Can you imagine? America let you do right to roam. It would just get ruined. They are right now at least a dozen people looking at someone thinking of going over their fence as a cut through with a shotgun going. Yeah. I'm legally allowed to do this. Popping cross it. But it's not even, I just feel like if you let people write to roam in America, it's just littering. You're going to have big red bottles everywhere in Mountain Dew Shoes. Big red? Yeah. That's your red neck term. The only people who drink a big red are not. They do not throw away a trash can. It's just like you can't have anything nice in America. So what if you find a big red thing out there like, how do you even find this, let alone throw it in the grass? Or just like monster energy drinks everywhere? I don't know why. It's so crazy that we just found this place in the map. But anyway, so we opened it and ended up being a great little hike and the next day there was the big, it was like, whatever, yeah, three, four hour hike that started and ended like at our fucking bed and breakfast was amazing. And then we ran into this Welsh guy who just was on his property to check, I guess, the water levels and we had a pleasant conversation. Everyone's always really nice when you're open to telling them that you're like, I guess traveling. But they got, yeah, he was like, there you go over here and then, yeah, and you don't mind that. Oh, and the sheep are quite lovely. And then it just blows my mind how friendly. Did they see a lot of tourists there, you think? I think just like, in country tourism, but not, I don't think a lot of a, I might be ignorant, but it doesn't feel like we ran into a lot of Americans and whales. Well, like I said, I've never met an American that was like, I went on a trip to Wales. No, nobody. If they get all the way to… No, no, no. Great Britain. There's no Doni. Yeah, that was the park. Yeah. But, yeah, so we bumped into the guy and like you said, there's like fences and they have just stairs for anyone that's coming through. It's pretty cool. It's a beautiful rain that like misty sideways rain that you want there, you know? Yeah. But like still warm enough? Right, I had like a light track jacket on and I wasn't cold because you're, you're also walking on some inclines. And also you might, you might get served, so you get ready to break. Right. And one of my best memories of my life was being in that bed and breakfast. We had this spacious room and I put on a moon dance, the album by Van Morrison. In the end of the mystic with the babbling book. It's raining outside because it's always raining a little bit. Wow, that was just… Drinking tea. Perfect. Guess fuck a lot. We fucked. I actually remember, I remember every time we've ever had sex and we tried to fucking the shower and it went on for like a day and a half and finally we had to just call it. It was one of those… We were like this. I don't think this is working. I'm like, yeah. If you're so locked in, I'm like, hold on. Get my leg… - I felt like my head was jammed into the tile. - You're trying to figure out a puzzle and stay hard. - It was like a waterborne. - Well, it was like a big shower. - I'm still wet. - It was like a big shower with like a bench in it. Like, so we were like, oh my God, we got to fucking the shower and then you try and you put a towel down for the her knees and then, but then the height is off. - There's her feet in your cords. - Yeah. I remember literally, we fucked for 75 minutes and we both were just like, yeah, I'm not. We just dried off and fucking went. - I was gonna get a burger. I was gonna get a dry burger. - This sucks, but yeah, so I don't remember fucking in there. That's so funny though. It's like a seven year ago, fuck that I remember. - Weird fucking in a B&B, the guy's bedroom. - Yeah, that's my house, dude. - So, I'm coming on my plant. - That sexual adventure nominee should be 20-25s. - Six, what are we in now? - So anyway, we gotta get to some of these other hikes for God's sake. - So you went on these hikes, that's so, okay, cool. Hiking was just phenomenal. - The first thing, too, we had a weird moment. We thought we heard gunshots and now, you know when you hear, you think you're gunshots, I don't know. We were like, marked down the time, just in case. - So you know, if there's a murder mystery, we could at least be like, it happened at 4.15. That's how we know. - I try to be a good, thoughtful citizen. You never know, you might be a witness in a murder. And we heard, it's whales. - And whale. - So you just, we literally heard like, (imitates whale) - It was popping. - Yeah, and I was like, that sounded like, I don't know what else that would be. And it was kinda spooked, we got spooked for a minute 'cause you're very isolated. - You're in the woods. - And they do have shootings every now and then. - People get murdered. - Yeah. - That's how you know guns, but I guess the gun. - No, I remember, I went to the UK in '87 and during that time there was a mad man, like some disgruntled worker that went all of his town and shot people in somewhere in England. But I remember that. - What's gruntled mean? - Disgruntled. - No, what's just gruntled? - Yeah, you never hear gruntled. - You were gruntled and then you got disgruntled? - Yeah, that's a good question. - Or is it just gruntled? - Gruntled. - To be pleased, satisfied and a good humor. No one's ever heard that, no one says that. - That's great, I'm quite gruntled right now. - Yeah, let's try using gruntled. - You hear about disgruntled, but you never hear about gruntled. - Yeah. - Back formation of what we're interested in gruntled did not exist for most English history. The word disgruntled came first, being angry or satisfied. 'Cause they probably had disgruntled at the first thing, I go, that's confusing. - Yeah. - Gruntled. - Get a little disgruntled myself. - But it's a fun word, disgruntled. - It's a fun word, isn't it? - Gruntled. - Very well placed. - Next time a tell says, like I was just said, am I totally gruntled? - And it'll go really, giving you, and you're like, all right, dude. (laughing) So anyway, so then we gotta get to some of these other hikes. We went to Dally Goo. That was the other place. - What's it terrain like on these hikes? - Okay. - Is it green, rolling hills? - Yeah. - For, the first few hikes that we did were nothing super, super estrenuous. Then I think the Dally Goo on the state park where we saw her the Navy jet go over. They just have like, you know, on Great Britain, sometimes they'll just (growling) that's, it feels like it's right over your head. - It's trying to break the sound barrier. - Yeah, it felt like, so we saw a few of those. That one had some inclines that were hard, but we'll get to the big one before we left. - This is always fine. - Oh, just every once in a while, there's just like a photo of your tits. - Let me see all of them. - Look at this. - The deal is, I get to see all the pictures. - Oh my God. - Now I just want to look through all the photos. Yeah, you guys keep talking for gun six. - Anyway, so. - Good once in. (laughing) - Anyways, and then it's so on top of it. - So. - Double, and I'm nothing without you. (laughing) - Sir, you had no expectations going into this? You were just like, whatever. - No, and honestly, I never was like a huge hiker, but I also was just like an alcoholic for 15 years. - That's right, you've never hiked, I remember that. You kind of were like, what is it? - What do we do? (laughing) - Because of Joe. (laughing) Because of Joe. Over the years, I just really like it. I like walking. I don't know if that's 'cause I'm older. - And the serenity of the front porch. - It's very spiritual, it's not in a cheesy way. I don't mean that I'm like finding God out there, but. - What do you mean then? - Then I mean like, it's good for writing, it's good for clearing your thoughts, it's good for rehashing old, old thoughts. - Is that meditative? - I find it meditative. - Spiritual. - Listening to, yeah, I like listening to music. I think of really grandiose ideas when I'm out there. - It is nice, you clear your brain and it lets you do whatever. - And then if you're with the front, I do, it's really fun. I inadvertently, because I'm in nature, somehow you just end up shit talking, which seems to be the anti, what you shouldn't be doing. But I really enjoy, shit talking to me is like an art and it's fun and it's rusty and I'm not out there ruining career. - Yeah, people call it negative. I'm like, no, but we're joining his friends here. So it's positive, and let's talk about it done this other person is. - And we're having a good laugh on writing jokes about it. - You can do about 40 scrolls in this direction safely and get to see some of this stuff. But basically, it's very specific northwest. - You look so young here. - I know, isn't it weird? I was thinking the same thing. Well, now I have a kid, you know what it is. - Oh, I know a lot of it's the, that's only been seven years. I mean, seven years is a long time. But I mean, it was fucking cheap 50 pounds ago. - Everywhere, 50's high. You love 50. Remember we had that other incident? - You're really bad at guessing. - We had that other incident, you're like, we were talking about some very attractive woman, you're like, I've got to lose 50 pounds. I'm like, that lady weighs 120 pounds. - At 70, she'd be fuckable. - But that's what are you like? - I was like, you got to lose 50 pounds. Like 50, do you know what, weight 50 pounds is? - I've lost 50, I got to lose 20 right now. - That was probably 30 pounds ago though. - But I'm also beefier, too. - I also like a trip where I'm working out, really. I hate, I mean, I'll take a good lying on the beach, but I also really enjoy swimming a lot when I'm at the beach. I just don't wanna get super fat on vacation. - Super fat, yeah. - That sounds very fat, phobic, but that's where I'm at. - Sorry. - Also, there's better. This is like kind of ideal, like British isles hiking. - Well, it feels very Pacific in the weather. Very great, like dark, rich greens, more-- - A lot of waterfalls are happening. - Dark in the rain. - Because it's rain. - Yeah, stone houses. - It's always funny, too. You always are like, isn't it great we're walking in the rain? And then when you're here, you're like, it's raining, I can't come out. - Right. - Yeah, that's perfect. - Like I was joking with my friend. She was like, after the wedding we took acid and we walked home in the rain and it was wonderful. And then we got back home when we got back home. I'm like, leaving work. She's like, can you get me some cigarettes? It's raining. I'm like, what, why don't you just take some acid and just enjoy your food? - Yeah, do some acid. Feel it. - So it was a lot of babbling, brooks, a lot of that kind of stuff. I mean, the difference, Peru is like, you go through climates where you're getting snow and then hot, but Wales was just, it was just beautiful and awesome. But then we had the other one, we went to Penny Farm. - What is that? - That's like P-E-N-Y-F-A-R, right? - Yeah, Penn/Y/Far. - What's the penny-fiving? Can I tell you why this one was particularly like, difficult for me? - Yeah. - No fucking switchbacks. - And this hike, what was one of those? - So that's difficult, what do you want straight up? - Yeah, and the climb was actually pretty intense. We did get to a switch as spiral. - Like these kind of steps. - Yeah, those are beautiful. - Oh, that's okay. - Yeah, those are okay. I like a switchback. - So Penny Farm was fun. - Wow, what is this? That's so cool, look at that. That's so pretty. Go back to the waterfall. That's Brecken Beacon's. - Wow. - So this hike was fun too, because we were driving, and I'll tell you, I'll get to where we fucked up. We were driving. - Oh yeah, a lot of lakes too. - We were driving back to return the car and then take a train back to Cardiff. So we were driving back, and it was our last, and we had to return the car at a certain time. And I was like, let's get one last hike in this penny farm. It's on the way, I heard it's great. And then we started driving down these like, one way roads where, well it's one lane, but two ways. You have to pull over and it was all these huge hedges. It was like 10 foot hedges. - Yeah, that's good. - You couldn't see anywhere you were going. - In the countryside, there's times where, when my parents talked about this, when they did the kind of the same trip, they talked about you'd have to stop the car, and somebody would have to get on to the roof of the car and be like, you could never tell if traffic was coming. It almost felt like you just hoped for some divine intervention that there was not another car speeding down when you take a turn. 'Cause the hedges are two, you can't see any ongoing traffic. - So we feel like you're in a dull, fucking maze. - Yeah. - What beautiful it is. Yeah, this is the top of Favourite. So you can see it there. So we did this last second trip. We were like, okay, we have to return the car by whatever it was, 6 p.m. We got here at like two p.m. - Wow, look at that, you see forever. - Oh yeah, and it's straight up. No switchback, you start at the ground, you walk up, and it's just a steady incline. Then you get to kind of like a bot, a steep incline that could be like a lake. I think there was like a lake down there. Lots of sheep too, which was fun to watch them run and heard. And then that kind of ended up getting like, 'cause now we're on the top, getting closer to the top. But yeah, that one, it wasn't until then that it got a little easier. but for about. - Half an hour, or maybe even longer, took a long time to climb. - Oh, it was hours, it was a couple hours. Steady incline, and then this is the best, similar to the breakfast, Sarah's like, all right, I'm calling it, I'm good here, and I was like, but it's right there. - I thought there was like this steeper incline, and I just, and Sarah, if you do not come, you will be so disappointed in yourself, and I have to tell you, it's such a great analogy in my career. - I just see it through, please. - 'Cause it's plateaus, and it's the thing we were looking at, it's this huge like circle plateau. - That's amazing. - That's a four million years to flatten out like this, and you can see the entire nation 360 degrees. - In the sense coming to the crowd cloud, so it looks like a place that you could, it'd be great for where aliens could beam you up. Like it looks like a great alien induction place. - I'm gonna say, we did a three hour hike, and with like 12 minutes left, so I was like, I'm calling it right here, good. - I can't do anymore. - There wasn't even, oh, let's just get to this point, and then we'll call it. It was the end of the thing, it was like the top. - Can I have to tell you what's also really funny when you do these things, and you're wearing your hiking boots, and you're like, this is like terrain, and you get up there, and there's like a four-year-old wearing converses that had, it's not, their feet are fine. - I'm just like, no, it's not gonna be a little. - But now having a kid, his fucking father probably carried him three quarters of the way. - Did I took, did you do Arthur Seaton, Edinburgh? Did we ever climb that hike? - I don't know what that is. - No, no, no, it's my central park there. But like, yeah, I took to Rosa. I was like, let's just climb it, it takes like an hour. - Yeah. - And it's like, it's all round about the expire. It's like not difficult. - Yeah. - And he did this, he quit like 10 minutes ago. He's like, nah, I'm like, bro, it's right there. We're gonna touch a fucking ancient stone. - No. - There was two hard and same thing, six-year-olds are passing us. - Yeah, well I was grateful that Joe was like, you have to do it. - You have to do it. - You have to do it. - But I had that-- - It was so beautiful. - Overruled, overruled, that's so dumb. - Yeah, there are times where you're like, that is dumb, you have to do it. I just thought it was gonna be a steeper climb. That's why I didn't wanna do it. - Right, but it was a mountain that's like, it's a mountain like this and then the trail goes up the top. So it's like, you could fall either way. So it's like the most beautiful kind of hike. - Also the history with that was, there was like a little kid grave up there and they're like, what? - Back in like a few hundred years ago, some five-year-old went missing and they found him dead up there. And you're like, how the fuck did he get up here? - That's where the guy that's the last time. That's how dad's like, I'm sure you're going. - We also went to the smallest house in Great Britain. We saw this little fucking thing. - There's somebody like to press, I don't wanna say, I guess it's depressing to me, but it towns that you're like, how do you guys make income here? Like how are you supporting yourselves? It's just a post office and then a B and B. - I don't know how I'm like, I feel like I'm a three hundred years old. I'm like blown away. I'm like, look at this. It's online. - It's so funny, it says the smallest house in Great Britain and there's crazy whatever the fuck this language is. - Yeah, that's the fucking illithical thing. But then in the window there's a picture of that house and it says the smallest house in Great Britain and then it goes eat to live Lou, whatever. Open daily, but it's a picture of its own house. It's like, yeah, we see the sign right there. - Oh yeah, Conway Castle, we went there too. - Yeah, we had fish and chips everywhere. - We had a hundred percent-- - Oh, this is the smallest house in Great Britain. - Yep. - Yeah, we didn't even know that. We just stumbled upon it. - We stumbled upon it. - Did you go in? - No, it's the smallest house, I think. - Yeah, and someone lives there, yeah. It's not in the slime. - Smallest house, there it is. - It's like I'm doing pretty well. - No, that was tremendous. What were the other things we were gonna talk about that were so interesting? - A big, big hike. - Well, we had one where David had told us directions. That was a really great one. That was the one with the ghost. - David's your father. - David's the father figure on the show. That one was on the coast and the waves were amazing 'cause it was just tumultuous. - Oh, that's right. - And we had, I think we just kind of inadvertently found, 'cause he told us it was so confusing. - Well, so that was the thing. - There's no signage. - No, there's no signage. - Let me tell you like 10 directions in a row. And you're like, you see me not writing this down. There's no way I'm getting these. - Well, but we ended up finding out. - We loved it because this is the other thing, this big gates and Sarah would have to keep getting out and swinging open these gates. That was what was so fun. - I think we think you're on people's private property. - Yeah, and we drove past it like 12 times 'cause it was so like unassuming. It was like this big gate covered in brush and everything. So we kept driving past it where like, it's gotta be this one. But you have this thought as Americans that you're like, what if this is the wrong gate and someone just unloads a fucking AK-47 on us? But eventually she pulled and it would be like an eight foot gate and she'd have to pull it and I would drive through and then she would close and jump back in the car. - That's fun. - That was fucking awesome. - I feel like you're going to a hideaway? - And it was so windy, remember? It was like crazy. Like my wig almost blew off. It was fucking nuts. - My bald spots were showing off. - Oh, so you have to wear wig with those curls there? And it's like you're like, weighing in on anything? - No, Sarah's bald spots were on full display. (laughing) - Oh, here's a video. - Oh, it's just, but that one was tons of sheep. - There we are. - But just like amazing, like three legs next to each other. - Yeah. - You just got yourself a comb over. - Just got amazing hair. It's not, it's not dandy line hair. - We were at the barbershop today and the kids barbershop and she was like, your hair is unbelievable. - Am I taking a shit there? - Sarah's sitting there. - Crying, Sarah's sad. Stop with the fur. - I miss David. I don't know. It was the best trip of my life. - So then what did you do after the hike? Did you just stay, do you want back to? - So then, this is so, it's difficult. I found food to be difficult if you're not in a main city. - Food in Britain in general is hard. They have like hamburgers that are brown and dry. There's like, I guess bangers and, you have like beef stew. - Did you like scones with clotted cream in the afternoon with an English breakfast tea? - Just occurred to me. We never had Indian food. - We should have done that. - I love Indian food there. - They love curries, yeah. - But yeah, we had fish and chips, five million times. - That's gotta be your like, your chicken parm for over there. - Oh, 100%. - Yeah. - Which is also because my parents, we just got back from Europe and my parents left America for the first time. - They went with you? - They came and- - They went to London and then also Dublin. That's what, I think that's probably what we didn't do. Curry, 'cause you can only get it in London and we weren't there that. - But we could have done it before, I guess. But man, it was hilarious. I mean, they are just- - It's a story I quote a lot where you're telling them, like, oh my god, Brazilian steak. So like, oh, did we have Brazilian steak on that? - On the Disney Cruise. - And then change the subject and you're like, all right guys, it's like actually the basis of this podcast, you know what, no one cares? I do care, I wanna hear about it. - No, no, they were hilarious. I mean, they had some funny moments. I got them as the air lingus lounge. They'd have never been to a lounge before. - Yeah, how'd you get them in? - We bought it. It was only $45, we got Joe did. - Yeah, well wow. - I mean, just clarify, I don't make any money. - My tickets got us in. That was the funny thing that the lady said too. Our tickets got us in and me and Sarah and Marty each had a ticket, so we each had a thing. And then two guest passes was like $45 or something like that. - But we're like gonna spend it at the diners or whatever that's nearby. And the lady goes, I'll tell you what, I'll credit the boys ticket, a two year old son hit ticket to one of them, so you only have to buy one pass. And I'm like this, yeah, that's what we're doing. Like I'm like, you're not, come on. Like when you're gonna charge the fucking the two year old. - You already thought that. - Yeah, I'm like, he's literally asleep. He was literally napping. I'm like, of course. So when he was getting to bed in one pass and then my dad asked the lady, he goes, "You got any local beers?" It's like, and it's a help yourself. It's not even a bar. It's like refrigerators with beer. And the lady, it was a Russian lady working there. She goes, "Bud wiser." We're in London. It's like, this isn't a place to be like, can I get a local beer? It's like, open the fridge and drink anything free. They had bush mels, whiskey, wine, beer. - Did you ever share the story when we went to Palm Springs that eat at this Mexican restaurant? - Oh my God. - And he's like, what beers do you have? Joe's dad, and she's like, Liz Corona, De Secchi, Ticotti, Bud Light, of course, just a long list of kind of beers like in that world. And then he's like, do you got any Sam Adams? You're like, no. Why would she, she would tell you that. - He'll very clearly American. - Palm Springs, Mexican Mexican Mexican. Mexican people, restaurant. - But you're like, you got Sam Adams over there? - She went to Hollywood. - She had a Sam Adams. - You got Boston Laga here? (laughing) Anyways, no, they were, they were fucking hilarious. And my mother, we went to Dublin and she was like, I thought this was gonna be like green grass and sheep. I'm like, well, this is the city. - City. - We're in Dublin. - It's a proper city. - Did you, when you were in Wales, was there anything like you were like, "Fuck, I wish we had done that." - No, because we did the one- - What you want to do. - Real city. - I think it was a ski in Snowdonia when it's more winter time. - Is that what they call it that? - Probably. - Yeah, maybe. - I don't know. Oh, but here's what we fucked up. Sorry, I know you have questions. - Or threats are good, but. - The big fuck up was, and I forgot about this 'til the other day, 'til Sarah reminded me. I tacked out, we didn't know this comic. Maybe you've done a Bergen Norway, Christopher. I've done it a few times and I was like, we're there. And he offered, he's like, you're gonna be in London, come do this. And I was like, well, we'll make more money. We'll pay for the trip. And we had been in Wales for six days and London for four days. And I thought, hiked and traveled and done the thing. - Just like, we're serene. - And it was amazing. And then it was like, oh, now we have a four hour flight north and have to work. Adding work or another thing. - On the tail end. - Big fuck. - You want it in the beginning. - You're not in the beginning, get it out of the way and then be like, sick now I'm done. Yeah, even if it's like, I'm doing tweets before and just one show it's already there. The last two days, you're like, let me think about my bits. What am I gonna say here? - Yeah, you're in, we start doing a countdown. - But even vacation in general, just don't push it. Don't go to a second location. It's like getting abducted. You just keep your wallet and then you're like, I can't go to a place. - Oh, you're gonna be there. You wanna come to a completely other country as long as they're there. Well, I'm already, in my first time in Australia, be like, you gotta go to New Zealand. I'm like, well, I'm not, why? - Right. - That's far. - It's like being like, you're going to LA, you gotta come to Seattle. - Yeah, it is like that. It's almost exactly like that. - I get that way when we have family from South Africa, visit the States and they'll be like in California and then we kind of get quietly butt hurt. They didn't come to see us in Texas, but you're like, yeah, it's not, it's not close. Yeah, it's stupid, but you can't help, but be like, but you, why can't you just swing to us? - Well, I remember thinking of that when-- - Already there. - We had a high school exchange student when I was in high school and he was from France and I was like, oh, what's Paris like? And he's like, I've never been. And I was like, what? - See there. - But then you're like, oh, it's like the equivalent of meeting an American and being like, what's LA like? And I'm like, I don't know, I'm from Charlotte. I didn't go there. - The best is an Ecuador correcting people on the geography of their own country. Like, yeah, I went there to the north. Like, is that the north of south? Like, it's definitely the north of the house week. - Yeah, really had to go north. But anyways, yeah, I mean, the trip was mostly-- - You guys ever fight traveling together? Is it ever like friction? - Couples traveling is a different way to travel. - I don't feel like it, I don't know. I can't remember ever being like-- - But you! - No, we don't, I don't think we fight there. I think when we did Belfast, it's that thing. Because it was like, Joe went there for work. And we had no one to like, babysit Joe. It rained, no one-- - No, the babysit Joe. (laughing) - I know what it is, it holds us in. - Marty, that there was no like, playground. So Marty and I were just kind of like stuck in the hotel. And I felt like, we had, it felt tension there a little bit. - Yeah, but not in a super negative way. - Yeah, yeah. - Sometimes just like, I don't want to do that today. - Right. - Especially after a week, you're like, well we're all kind of probably want to do the same thing. And then longer than that, it becomes like, now I want to do this. - Right. - I mean, the other person's like, well, I have no interest in that. - Right, no, I don't really have that. I don't know, I always see couples in like the subway. I saw a couple of the other day being like, I can't win with you. And they were like, well, I don't know what to tell you. And they were like, I don't know, we're never really those. - To go, when I see it publicly, I'm like, this is so far past the disagreement. This is like habitual with you guys. You're, to go public with a fight is so nuts. I don't care who sees me. We're having it out right now. Don't talk about doing this. - Yeah, I don't have that. Also on vacation for me. - On vacation, this is for the most part. - I wish I never, happier ever when I'm traveling. - I think we're always in the zone. We're on vacation. 'Cause all external shit like our day-to-day life and time challenges that we deal with are gone. It's we are the team. - Right, so if you have any friction, it's like, well, let's weigh less friction than my normal life. So it's still like, it went from a 90 to a six. - And we have a goal together. - Well, I also think with vacation, the great thing about vacation is, and this is what we talk about 'cause we don't drink. What you miss, what I really miss about drinking, is the feeling of everyone together being like, we don't give a fuck. Forget all the stuff. We are letting go complete. It's weirdly meditative to drink. The problem is when you're done meditating, you fucked your ex-girlfriend and shit on the front end. - You can see it again, Dorosa. - But it's like that feeling of-- - The letting go. - I'm letting go of this day. I'm not trying anymore. Let's get drunk. And that's what vacation feels like is like, I'm not thinking about any, and I don't respond to texts or email or anything, when I'm on a trip. - That's so smart, you too. I at least want, I get to do one hour of catch up with stuff because I can't let stuff go. But I get really bad, you know? Someone's like, when can we do this? And you're like, I can't let two weeks go by without talking to that. - Yeah, you gotta tell everybody that's like, I'm actually gonna be out of touch. - Yeah. - So there's not like, in an emergency, it's like, just, I won't be there. - Right. - But you gotta really let people know way ahead of time so they can plan for it. - Yeah. - Yeah. - I do like an out-of-office reply. - That's so fun. - That's so fun to have people. You know you're gonna hurt them. They're gonna run you and you go, I'm off on vacation and wales and I go, - It's respected too. I just got reached out to somebody to do a clip for me and they are on vacation and I was like, respect. - Nice vacation, this day and age? Wow. - Yeah, I will not be answering from 62 to 67. - Well, that's not 67. Well, that's what I just, I love so much about you. And that's what we just did this two week trip to all these countries. And the thing I actually realized till I get home that I love the most was we weren't podcasting. - Yeah. - I hate podcasting. I mean, I hate it. - It's getting to be too much. - It's too much. - It can be a time suck for creative endeavors. - It's another one I quote it when I was like, we were doing that two cigars, two comics. - Yeah. - And you and I were smoking and you were like, it's for 45 minutes and you were like, "All right, can we turn this off and talk real shit about people?" Well, fucking, remember when we went to the fucking, I got furious with you years ago, we went to the avalanche game and you're trying to smuggle microphones in. I'm like, "I can't podcast at a hockey game." It's like people sitting with us. It's crazy. - Yeah, it's like taking a face time in public. - Yeah, it's a little too much when you're just like, can we just have a conversation or just be quiet for a bit? - Well, my thing is- - Sometimes I like a good silence. - Yeah. - And look out the window as you're driving, both quiet and just both looking out their sides. Or one of you and the other ones scrolling Instagram. Either way. - Yeah. - No, I mean, like the hard thing for podcasts is it's like, I do, I actually love it and it's fun. You make money and you joke around and fans love it and it's fun to have that, but it's not art. - No. - It's like, "I want to write a movie and take photographs and do comedy." And podcasts, I'm like, "Would you blow your dad for a hundred bucks?" - You're like, "You might be good at it or bad at it." But it's like, do you really put a lot of thought into how these are gonna be going? - Right. - I've never cared enough about podcasts. - Right. - Like give a fuck. That's just stand up and that's it. - Right. If it was a good source of income for me, I would. - Yeah, but then it's a job. You don't have a care. - But it's such a time commit. I mean, to have an obligation every week. - Every week, it doesn't end. - Yeah. - I like this one. I could build up ahead of time and take months off. - Yeah, batching is better. - Yeah, this will be on late October. - No, it's like, yeah, is that right? - I don't know. - I don't know. - We might be able to take months. - Should we announce it now? - I mean, I've talked about it in every podcast. But also then it gets nice out here and you're like, "I don't know what I'm talking about." - Yeah, right now. You gotta wanna go after October. - Yeah, whenever the weather, I will say, the only thing I'm traveling I get a little tired about, I get tired of like living out of my suitcase and wearing the same thing over and over again. - That does. - We're in the packing. - We're packing, we're packing, we're packing, we're packing. - Yeah, and then we've seen how you unpack. - Like just, I unpack, I unpack, I let it out. I let it out. - I don't know how you do it. Even for two days and then we're going up somewhere else, I'm like this, it takes you eight hours to get all your shit back together again, right? - Oh, it takes quite some time. - Yeah. - I just told the story when we were in Key West. You were like, "I landed in Key West." And I was like, "I'll be right over." And I came and it looked like, "I can't even describe it." It looked like you opened your suitcase and shook it as you did laps around the house. I couldn't believe it. There was clothes over there and over there there was a dildo and come and fucking a bedsheets. I was like, "What?" - Wait till I get high. "Ajra comes in sometimes to my hotel." And she got nothing like that. And then she'd be like, "Why are they just rappers everywhere?" - Like what do you mean, like M&M, Sir Mixlott? - Yeah. (laughing) - M&Ms, you got me. - M&M. - Sir Mixlott sounds like candy. - You look like a rapper. (laughing) - M&M was the first great one 'cause I really could've gone either way. - Right. - That was great. - Yeah, yeah. I'm like, "Where's my thing I need?" - Do you get souvenirs when you go on trips? - I will. - souvenirs is a good topic. - Thank you. - I like to get natural souvenirs. - No, stupid ears. - A rock. - You have stupid ears? - Yes, stupid ears. - A rock from somewhere. - Oh, that's a burden. So you're just carrying heavy rocks over. - Fuck off, fuck you. I invited you over here. You're mad at me? - I'm pretty mad. - Why? - No. - Oh. (laughing) - Really? - Yeah, something is unique from there. Or if I need something, then I'm like, like if I don't have a bathing suit, I'm like, "You know what, I'll wait, I'll get it." And I'll be like, "That's your souvenir." - I got a lot of bathing suits in the world. - I had a bathing suit for like a year once. - By the way, my travel-- - I had to touch you down to give you a bathing suit. - My-- - A blue bathing suit. - It's burdened in my head. - I fucking blew one piece. - One of my travel tips, and I tell this to Sarah and it never gets through to her. We've bought 50, one of our number one things we do is buy a lady's bathing suit on the road. - Really? - But one of my travel tips, take a bathing suit, swim suit, put it in your suitcase, let it live in your suitcase. - The travel suitcase. - It takes up no space. - The travel bathing suit, I'm in. - And then you just have a bathing suit. - Oh, speed up, guys. - So many people just think, like, oh, I'm going to Detroit. I'm not going to swim there. And then you get to hotel and you're like, - Duh. - This is a component of that. - Yeah, it's so annoying. - Or worse, do you know? - Another annoying thing when traveling is I, your England collected so much data for me because all their menus are QR codes. - I think you start getting like subscriptions. They're like, what dude, I just want to eat here. I didn't want to, I didn't consent to signing up for anyone you can do business with. - I got up to five apps. - I had ScotRail, Irish Rail, EU Card. - When portals, it's insane. - No, I had 50 apps for the trip. Well, that was hard about this trip. We just did is, and we were talking about things you get sick of on trout. Because we were bouncing around and I had my parents, we were taking buses every day, trains every day. So half my vacation was being like, okay, we got to take that, which I do love for a while until the 17th day, we were like-- - It maybe becomes the guy that we're like, where are we going? - Yeah, you're like, okay, we're going to take living on your phone until I have to do this constantly. - Yeah, so-- - That's when it's nice to have someone else play, and I'm just gonna go wherever you guys are going. Even if I see the directions that way, if we're going, I'm not weighing in. - Well, I love being that guy, and I take pride in it, but by the 16th day, you're like, I can't look at bus schedules anymore. It's like making me go. - Can we share, I wish we could share the lady that we took a photo of if I felt bad. - Oh, you could share it? - We sent it to you. I mean, you could put it up, who gives us-- - Oh, yeah. - Oh, yeah, yeah. - You have it, because I sent it in the thread. - Yeah, hold on, I do have it. - But I have the photo. I showed Joanne Judson, she's like, that can't be real. - It was one of the things like, couldn't stop laughing, and I know it says that someone else is expense, but like, come on. When you're walking out of the house like this. - I like the idea that you're like, we can't show this on Ari's show. - Ari's like, maybe first and last eight. - I have to see if it's, I have to figure it out here. - How are you crazy? - I think it's in my favorites. - I got it right here. - It's fucking nuts. - I say this is a Belfast's eight, and this lady, the craziest photo is the full photo, because, but I don't want to share with my son in it, but it's like me and my two-year-old-- - A lovely photo. - Yeah, it's my son sitting on my lap on a double-decker bus, and this fucking-- - It was also one of those moments too when we were on the bus. Jo had recalled the memory. He was like, you know, and there's two women that were laughing hysterically, and he thought it was a snafu that he did. - Yeah, so I got on the bus, and the ticket didn't work. Everyone's like, you scan, it didn't work. And then, the guy, I heard him say something, I couldn't understand the accent, so I got up with my son in my hand to go scan. I was like, oh, he wants me to rescan, and the bus had started moving, so like, we went flying. The guy was like, I mean, look at this. - She looks like she's zoom out a bit. Don't show him, but zoom out some. And then, she looks like she's putting a curse on you, like a Romanian jersey. - Yeah, looks like Sam Raimi, film. - I know, and I'm taking the photo, it's obviously I'm taking a photo of her. - No, I didn't even think about it. - You were not. - I had clocked her before she went on the bus. - Did she draw in her eyes angry? - Can I just say somebody else? - She was like, I want people to know all upset. - I showed this to a friend, and we were talking about like you would think that she would get a natural brow lift from the tight bun. - Yeah. - But no. - No, she drew him lower. She drew him lower because she, so if she takes the bun out, those are below the eye. - Those are dropping below the eye level. - And look at, it's almost a unibrow, and then she was like, ah, fuck, I didn't want, and then just took a little eraser. It's enough for a little eraser had to get into the center. - In the middle. - It's unbelievable. - Yeah, it doesn't match. - It doesn't look like any eyebrow that's ever eyebrowed before. - I also think how-- - There's no lift to it. - She probably has a mass of headaches from how tight that bun is, and I also think how good that would feel to take that out at the end of the day. Just have it stick. - Yeah, or then being water in your head. - Trust me, sister, I get it. - You're almost there. - That'd be a good comb over, just get it on top and cover up. - But you're like, you know, you just want to help someone like that. - Oh my God, if you hold onto the button, she looks so much sadder. - Yeah. - She's like, looks away just like, oh my life sucks. - Well, she's got some problems. - Well, you know, I can make it a little bit better. Just a few tweaks and-- - Her deep set of her eyeball. - You know what she looks like? - She's tired, y'all. - Her nose and mouth look like Danny DeVito's penguin in Batman Returns. She kind of has a DeVito penguin look. - Yeah, she does. - Right. - And the outfit, kind of extraordinary. Look, she's got a black-- - Stripes that matches her eyebrows. - She's Danny DeVito. Can you but, hey, YMH, or if you're whore, how you want to try it, but if not YMH, put a side-by-side with her to Danny DeVito as a penguin. - Yeah, I'll see that. Let's see what we come up with. - Interesting. Well, yeah, I thought, also, UK was interesting too, because, you know, you watch Love Island and you're like, where are they finding these girls? And you're like, oh no, they're all over Britain. Those girls were so many fake eyelashes and tons of pancake-y makeup. - And she, she looked like that. - That is amazing. - You nailed that. - Wow, oh, bless our hearts. - Oh, yeah, he's got to put it up in a bun. - Like the nose and the mouth crease? - Oh my God. - That's pretty close. - She should do stand-up comedy and I mean that. - She would-- - If she just told me about her day. - Oh my God. - And didn't even try to be funny. I bet you she's funnier than most people. - I don't know, guys. - Yes. - What's the next place for you guys? - I really want to go to Columbia. So Sarah, who's the guy you follow that did the thing about going places? - I don't know his name, but it went viral a few months ago. The guy that was like, he does these quick 24 hour trips as far as like Brazil, where he goes, you get there early in the morning, you can do a whole day and then you can leave at night. - Wow, really. - And there are generally some places that you could-- - You got to have an emperor close the town. - Yeah, I think Barcelona was one of those places. - If you landed in Newark at seven, you're getting to Manhattan by 10.45. - Well, we had this-- - It was Barcelona, really. - Yeah, we had to stop-- - Several places that were like that. He went far. - But we just did like, we went to Edinburgh. That's the way we started. That was our port of entry. And we had the best day there, 'cause we got there at 10 o'clock in the morning. - You're kind of loopy. - And you can't get into a hotel yet. - Yeah, so you have to like just by time. We went out, we did Edinburgh, it was fucking great. And then that night, you're like, if I woke up tomorrow morning, I went back to the airport and flew back. - We're good, we got it. - It's not crazy. - Yeah. - So I would take that idea and be like, two days. But so now we have the baby, but I was just thinking I'm like, we could go to Columbia on a Friday morning, get a hike in some coffee chill. Next morning, do like a serious hike and then be back Sunday. - Yeah. - You know what I mean? Or something like that. Like Columbia, but like. - Well, changed my mind about traveling. Meaning like you don't really have, you don't have to put too much thought into it. - You really don't. Especially people who have regular jobs are like, fuck thanksgiving already. Just leave Wednesday night, come back Sunday. - Yeah, go to a place. - Go to a place where they don't do it. So it's not even packed or anything. - Right. - And Spain, I'd really go to Spain. - I knew the Pyrenees. I want to do that well now in the hike that everyone talks about. It's like 500 miles where you stop off in these cool towns. - And I can speak for Spain. - From like it into like France to Spain. - Yeah, something like that. - Michelle Wolforanet. - I can believe it. - Wait, what's the call? - Like politically. - She would convene over the area. - Caminos, Santiago, Camino, the. - That girl can do anything. - Yeah, she sets her mind to it. - Those Caminos. - No, so and then we want to come back. The whole point of our UK trip, we just got back from was to visit you. - Yeah. - And you weren't there. - People love that. They love that you weren't there when. - Oh, they think it's the funniest. - You said you were going. Will I be there? And I go, yeah, I think I will. - No, no, no. - You said, I'm going this day in whatever. Are you gonna be there? - No, that was after the initial you're moving. So I was like, great. And then after we booked, I was like, you're gonna be there. - Will you be there? - I'm like, yes, I will. - Yeah, no, we booked the whole tour. No, 'cause my agent was like, I don't understand. Sorry, he's not there. - No, I'm not. - Yeah, I was ready to do a guest spot for you. It would have been sick. I was planning again there, late March. - We didn't see Tim Dillon there. - He was there though, so funny. - I reached out to him, I go, are you in England? 'Cause I saw my peers Morgan. And I was like, oh, we're there. I'd love to catch up. And then he just reaches out to Joe only. And then cancel twice. - Multiple times was like, I'm coming to the show. We'll have, like three different times. Never saw him. - There's nobody who cancels more. - No offense, Mark. I know you're a big canceler. - Well, Mark doesn't cancel. He goes, ah, I can hit my cab. - There's no one. We had all these plans to go see the next game one. Like, what are we gonna do? We gotta go watch. This is five days ago. We're like, all right. Okay, what are our options? Like, well, we can go to a fucking sports bar. Sam's out of town, I think he's going. He didn't have the party. - They made it on the TV. - So I'm like, do you know anyone who has a house? Obviously, Mark. You do. But whatever. And he goes, no, let's get a comedy club to show. Like, all right, look into the Brooklyn rooms. You know those-- - Who are we talking about? - Norman. - Oh, right. I forgot that he's a Nick's fan. - That's what I remember. - I mean, I mean, whatever. You gotta support the home team. - He also says, we, he's a we guy. He's like, we won. I'm like, you're already we. - He's me. - I don't think you know what of me. - I don't know. I don't think you know what a free throw is. He's saying we, I can't abide this Mark's a sportsman. - But I might see, we tried the cellar. Like, hey, let us in the new room. Let us all just have a party there she was like zero chance and so I was like all right Well, let me know what the book and then that morning like you're gonna. Hey me. I talk I took spots Well, that's the funniest idea of Mark being a big nicks fan I'm like he will not watch a single minute of the game because he'll be doing the watch at the bar in New York comedy club Yeah, but I love being in the same city as a comic that you and our friends with I think it's fun Yeah, I like to go out Yeah, let me see no one wants to see it some movie like you're across town. I love it so much. I just booked a UK tour You didn't come let him down let him down, but One of the trips I wanted to do before and so the oh so this is I talked about unique ways of finding places to go travel When we were at the air B and B in Wales. I was I was Eve's dropping on the people eating breakfast and the woman was talking about how York is the most beautiful City in the world, and and it's just and if you look at York. Yeah, it's crazy It's like the most beautiful thing I've ever seen so 2020 that was the plan was to go to York and there's a national park there That's on the coast in England. I forgot the name of it It's on the east coast of England next to York So that's the ship I really want to do and now I've never toured those northern cities like Liverpool leads Manchester so I think the next trip might be doing Newcastle All these places Scarborough. Yeah, North York more is national park. That's the one. I also there's nothing to kill you there We have a pub called tollum well not we but my have a fan. There's a family pub called tollum us arms That I wanted it was one of the flattest flat tires Just like we have to the tollum my family has a dub dub and so you want to go see it? Well, it's not like Yes, I do I want to go to Tollum us arms and relapse and relapse. That's the place of relapse I'll lapse. Oh, that is a thing All right, so here's the roots of the Santiago and and Columbia Yeah, and York and you work and you know, I would also like to do Asia I want to do a food I want to go to rehab for my Asian voice. I think I would do South Asia like I want to do Vietnam Thailand I want to eat I want rending. I just want to eat food Brian Redbane. Brian Redbane. Branding is amazing I read a list of best foods in the world time magazine, but and that was number one red day Rendon I got a purple and then I saw it in Indonesia. I'm like wait. I remember this from a thing. Yeah Befriend done. I made somebody at Barstool in Chicago make it. I think I'm a Malaysian I would eat it at this place called Malaysian grill on the upper west side Indonesia and Malaysia is like the same shit Yeah, it's so good. Oh, is it I mean, it's like region where we haven't done it tonight. They got general style mission Chinese are back They're back. Maybe all right. Let's wrap this up. Let's go guys a plate of my underwear questions rapid fire No, what we did we did what's it called throughout? Tips tips you have one. You did one. I have no I have no tips. I'm still trying to figure out how to pack if you have packing to be No, it's so good. Get a good suitcase when you're traveling my wheels breaking Suitcases from my parents one year. By the way funny story Christmas. I got zero gift from my parents my sister my my sister my wife I confuse my wife sister my wife got a lovely matching set suitcase for my parents and they gave me zero things But then the wheel just broke because it was from marshals and How to good run it did it's just I need like off terrain wheels because you're on cobblestones and Europe Roads and your wheel. I don't know. It can't take it bump it You need like one of the suitcases where the wheels swivel mm-hmm I got a tip and we just did this we stayed in Soho as we always do in London and There's the camera muse a not museum a photography photography. Fucking place. That's awesome You know, I'm a lover of photography We each got I got his and hers black and white instant cameras black boy film Then you just add disposable camera. That's the word. It's looking for not instant dispose of camera So yeah, then you get your pictures when you time you only get 20 or 40 whatever. Yeah, 27 or something like that Yeah, and then you like take them wisely, and let's look at him in like a month. Yeah, sick. We live it. Yeah That's a that's a fucking solid one. There you go. I mean, I guess it's half yours because you're fucking you guys split everything now So great tips Aaron Joe. Yeah, you're welcome I was breaking down real real quick. That's what I did this on the trip I was breaking down George Carlin had that bit about one hour photo and he's like, oh, what is this one hour? You just saw the fucking thing, but I was like well the point is that like you get the service done quickly Yeah, you don't have to wait through your laundry and come right back Yeah, you drop it off and then you have your photos. You didn't just see you took a thing when you had the film in your pocket Drop it throw it to the you just take a picture of the one-hour place I'm Lord Carlin. No, I took the photos six months ago, but now I can drop it off go to Burger King eat lunch come back and get my photos That's the one I want to come back three days later. I bet our bits in life that you hear that you're like It's not logical. You maniac. Well, you're your mental I think Dana go ahead a joke about George Carlin when he was like George. God had to joke get on the plane get on the plane Fuck you. I'm getting in the plane. Dana go goes all right, George. I think you I Think you knew what they were I think Seinfeld have the same bit but he goes you don't take it over you get you take it. Yeah, you drive way you drive in your drive All right, well, you know what? What have you ever laughed at stuff like that? I like I want to have the etymology of that word is Get on the plane. I'm getting into the plane. All right, George. This is one of the guys who are currently feeling very gruntled Okay, George. All right boys. Thank you very much. Everybody check it. I'll do it outro later That's a woman. Oh, plural boys. Yeah, you get enveloped That was fun great job. Jorge on the ones and two Jorge killing it improving every episode. These will be out of order You'll see how good he is and you'll know what order we taped it As he shows improvement of these ten or so. We do here. Oh, I'll plug him when it comes out your dates and all your and all your shit if you have a special comment I'll save it for then. Yeah, but both these guys are in the show the end right now at rshfr.com You can get each of the episodes. You actually were not in the fuck episode. You were in the I'm a failure episode Yeah, I was wondering how did you fuck? I thought I was your first lover Shane Sam talent Rob Robert Kelly Soder Yeah, and I'm with fucking slappy white Jordan Jensen and Roy Wood Jr Anyway, guys, thank you. Yeah, let's go eat. Let's go eat some dinner boom. I haven't heard more damn nice episode. Nice non-comedy related episode I know a lot of people go a lot of the what are the critiques of this show is that You know all the comedians on I'll just talk about stuff. They've done for stand up, but that's not really true I actually don't really talk much about the shows at all unless they've been in really weird places like like When Tom Rhodes came on and talked about performing on my goal. I find that very interesting But generally I tried it to keep him away from one the stand up stuff and two politics There's no politics and whales. I don't even think it's a country. I think it's a non-associated region of the United Kingdom It's coming home by the way Hopefully hopefully they beat Norway because this podcast bumpers recorded before the Norway game. Oh my god Dude, the fucking okay, so pubs here close early 11 sometimes 12 and The last UK game the last England game. Excuse me against Mexico was started at 1 a.m Here and by royal decree the pubs were allowed to stay up to 5 a.m Which was lucky because I was like the only 3 3 30 max now the game was delayed by an hour for lightning strikes Dude, I was falling literally fall asleep before at the cup hub before the show started Before the game started and when it did man the energy was there. What a game. I've never seen defense like in the month I've been following soccer That's right associated Associated that's where soccer comes up the football association Soak That's right soccer is the real term not football Also in Victoria Park where football kind of started bring it's coming home guys. It's coming home God, I hope they beat Norway. This will be so stupid God it was electric everybody's like screaming at the ref at the other team. Wank Wank So funny. It's so fun being here. My stuff's been in storage for over a year I still feel like I'm traveling and It's been legitimately wonderful to be here be associated with these people. I came right from the New York Knicks Winning a title and that whole title run where I was a bandwagon fan But the New York Knicks fans were like you can be a bandwagon fan. We've been it's been long enough since we've been Title contender that we'll allow you it was great the whole city came alive and man England is coming alive for the English football team. It's coming home Wank, uh, Wank, uh Oh, then we hit it go. Dude, so I watched one game at a at a gunner pub and then when Harry Kane scored like "ArriKain" is spits when it talks, "ArriKain" is spits to a stiff. But this time when he had that penalty kick, he was like, "Hey, I really can't. I really can't." Ooh. Oh my God. It was electric. I can't. I mean, when it does come home, I'm going to riot in this city the same way I rioted in New York. That's right. I made sure to pick out a head of time, placed where there's no CCTVs, dead spots, and I created Mayhem there. I'm hoping you appreciated the episode. Thank you, Joe Lesson, Sarah, toll him us for coming in. Then go check them out, there's specials, butthole money and the voluptuous boy for Sarah, for Joe. It's enough for everybody. This year's material, and I hate myself, you can check out Sarah Tollemash at SarahTKami.com. She's in SoulJoles at Potsdam.pa this weekend, the 17th. Check her out on youtube.com/SarahTollemashKami, Instagram/SarahTollemash. JoeList, you can follow him on his podcast, Tuesdays of the stories, the regs, Instagram.com/JoeList comedy, youtube.com/JoeList comedy, and he's on the road to coma, Portland, St. Louis, Austin, Royal Oak, Michigan, Seedbrook, New Hampshire, Rochester, Tampa, Philadelphia, Raleigh, Kansas City, get all tickets at www.commediateJoeList.com. And please subscribe wherever you watch the listing. Next week, I believe we're going to do another trippy award winner, Magnus Return. Hamilton Morris for Best Drugs, honestly already, possibly best episode, and another trippy nominee for Best Drugs, for taking Ibogaine and Gabon, and then going to South Africa. It's a Gabon/South Africa trip, and it was a wild one. Do an Ibogaine with Tribesmen and Gabon for days at a time. Hamilton rules, you guys. You're going to love it. Please subscribe. If you're watching on YouTube or if you're watching on Spotify, subscribe, guys. So you're notified when new episodes like that come in because it's a great one. We get to that, I don't know what we'll do. Maybe Big J. Ocasin. Blue J. Ocasin. That's it. And make sure to hit the end. Go to rshfr.com to get the end. Get all seven episodes, plus the, what do we call it? Damn, I haven't said it in a while. It's the prequel, no, damn. I made for like 60 grand, I made a explanation, a claymation explanation of what happened to the old show and how it's beginning a new show. And it's hilarious and you guys will love it. By Gravy Mercedes, William Childress, sorry, not William Childress, it's a comedian friend. We'll child. We're all seven for just 29.999, help support me producing independent stand-up comedy, the way I want to. You can stream it. As soon as we're done with the streaming, we'll be giving out download codes so you can download the episodes as well. But for right now, it's just available on streaming, but don't worry, you'll own it forever. I will see to that. That's it. I will say, let's continue this thing and put it out something great this week. I also went to Wales, by the way. Wales. Real quick. I guess I was there. I didn't really do much. It was just on the way to a music festival, so I did a show there where I acquired one pound of mushrooms. I was the shaman for my group at a camping festival that once from London brought the white and I brought the mushrooms and a guy, you know, an Irish guy. Did mushrooms for the first time in his life? He did it for four straight days, lost his shoes on day two, turned his phone off, he went out of batteries. I say this story a lot. After four straight days of mushrooms, his first four days, he turned his phone back on a Monday, got his angry text message from his boss, saying it's not very cool that you're not coming in on Monday when you said you would. He took his phone, realized how terrible this phone was in his life, and he just ruined his voice again and then Helen went and got it and goes, "I'm holding on to this till we get back to London." What a memory that was. What a festival. Yeah, I got pounds of it. Pounds of it. God. England knew festivals right. Speaking of that, here's the good thing I want to tell you for the day. Another band. The last dinner party. They fucking rule. Joe Liss, if you're listening to this, you would love them. There are mix between Florence and the machine and white reaper. They shred, guitar driven rock and roll shredding with a cultish, witchy attitude. Their performance was next level. Wolf Alice was on after them at this festival and I just didn't care about Wolf Alice after them. It's kind of like when I see somebody like real natural go on stage, like real smooth and natural, like Tony Woods, Eddie Griffin, and then afterwards a good comic go on, who's semi-conversational. They seem contrived afterwards and seeing Wolf Alice after the last dinner party. It made it like every time she did a wolf Alice, I guess Alice, did her interstitials. I'm like, "You're pretending." God, the last dinner party was so fucking good that performance level was on another level. I got to reach out to them and see if they want to come. With this podcast. Does anyone have an end with the last dinner party? God, they were all so fucking witchy and fucking cool. I cried like multiple times watching that show. Any chance you get to see the last dinner party live, take that chance. Anyway, that's the episode. Thank you very much Sarah and Joe for coming in. Today's episode is produced by your mom's house network. It's recorded by Jorge over at Gas Digital. Check out Gas Digital if you want to rent a studio space for Jorge's man on the ones and twos. It's edited this episode by Alan Caffey. That's it, everybody. I hope you're enjoying your life. It's coming home. Sorry United States. You made a good run. Congratulations, Donald Trump for getting what's his name, Balagon reinstated. It's pretty funny that Trump spends not being political, but Trump spend a lot of his time trying to negate the birthright citizens saying you can't just swim over here and have your baby on shore. Do you know the story of Balagon? So his parents were visiting Nigeria and born, lived in England somewhere. Anyway, they were on holiday in the U.S. and then they got back in a plane to go back to the U.K. and the airline was like, "No, absolutely not. You're seven months pregnant." I don't know what's allowed in fucking Nigeria, but no, you're not going to have planned this pregnant. There's no chance. Not where there's nowhere to land over a bunch of water for forever. So she had her child in the United States. Not what she would have, but then she said it was fate. It was fate that she plays for the United States. It was fate that Balagon played for the United States and not because he would have been maybe the fourth striker on the U.K. team, on the England team, excuse me, and probably not made the team, or the probably second or third striker on the Nigerian team. No, it was fate. And Donald Trump, I love that guy, who's so against birthrights, citizens. He's like, "No, no. I'm going to fight to get this guy." That was Rickard. Rickard stayed. And I'm not saying I like the other party. I'm not saying I like Democrats, but it is funny. It's funny. They're all hypocrites. Every witch side. What do you prefer? People putting humans in cages of the border, or people who prefer building cages for the border to put humans in, to really no one's situation. So you can just leave. People are asking me if I left because of Donald Trump. No, dude, I've planted this for three years. I hope you enjoyed the episode. Again, please subscribe. Leave a comment. Like, the people really are in the comments. If you've seen the last dinner party, or if you've been to Wales, or if you've anywhere, you've just been way in on the comments saying, "I took a great trip." You can also follow. You'd be tripping pod on Instagram, at you'd be tripping pod where you put up pictures that were unreleased in the episode. Fun little details in there. I will tell you guys, the trip around the world is now coming. I am searching hard for an apartment flat where I'm living now. Once I get that, I'll have so much time, and I can be going over it, and I'm going to be picking out that winter for the trip around the world, for the Patreon. I also got other things for the Patreon. I would say don't subscribe right now, but soon subscribe at patreon.com/jubytripping. It's possible to be tripping pod. I don't really know. And together, we're sending someone a trip around the world. Don't do it yet because I'm so far behind, I feel bad taking any extra money. That's it guys. Until next week, with Hamilton Morris, I'm Ari Schaffer, saying cheerio.