Understanding Frequency - The Key To Your Evolution

What is up SDC? I'm back with another episode. It is far too long overdue and in all honesty, man, the last few months of my life have been so amazing, so incredible, so wild. And I'm so excited to be back with you here in another episode, sharing this wisdom, this insight, this transmission that has been coming through so powerfully for me and so real. As real as the sky is blue and as real as knowing with absolute certainty that the sun is coming up tomorrow. The last 60 days of my life being 4.5 years alcohol free, I've experienced more shifts, more changes, more integration, more calibration, and or I should say recalibration, and a raising of my entire conscious energy, my frequency, the relationship that I have with myself, the way that I interpret reality, the way that I interpret God, source, universe, label it what you want. Don't get caught up whether you're religious or not, atheists or not. I'm talking about that underlying intelligence that knows how to beat your heart and digest your food without you putting in any effort. The thing that makes this all real, the underlying animating intelligence that permeates nature, that permeates all human beings, that permeates all plant life and the entire biology of what we know as this earth. And it's wild, it's wild. And so in this episode, you know, I want to talk a little bit about alcohol, but where I want to focus most of the conversation is about understanding your frequency and how this all connects together, how it connects to alcohol, how it connects to addiction, how it connects to your personality, how it connects to your goals, your beliefs, your values, your identity, your paradigm, what you believe to be true about yourself, what you believe to be true about this three-dimensional existence that we're all living in, what you believe to be true about the possibilities of what can happen. And I want to I want to help you connect the dots here because it's all connected. It's all connected. You've heard me say this time and time again. Quitting drinking has nothing to do with alcohol. And what you discover on this journey as you come home to yourself and you begin developing the courage to open yourself to what is out there outside of what is already known and familiar and safe and comfortable. All the autopilot programs and patterns that you have known and have operated within and have been familiar with and have used as a way to get to where you are now in this present moment, that there is there is so much more, there's so much more, the rabbit hole goes so deep. And I don't just mean in terms of information, but I mean in terms of experience by how the fabric of your consciousness, the fabric of how you interface with yourself and how you interface with the environment, how deep and transformational and profound that can be and is not candy, but is. And so in this podcast, I want to talk about frequency, you know, and so what is your frequency and what frequency have you been operating in, right? What has been the frequency of the way that you show up, the way that you feel, right? So when we think about frequency, frequency is your, it is the total sort of representation of your energy system, right? By now if you've listened to my podcast, you've began to hear this term, the human operating system that we're a conscious witness to. And so if you're listening to this episode for the first time, let me just kind of take a quick step back and help you understand the model, okay? None of us asked to be born as far as we know. Maybe we did, maybe we're here on a mission, on a path and a purpose, maybe we knew exactly what we're going to come to do on earth and what we're going to experience. And it's there's fate and destiny and it's all divinely guided and scripted. Maybe not. Maybe it is and we forget who knows. But what we do know is that as far as we know, we didn't ask to be born. I know that for me, that's something that constantly plays in my head. And it became very real to me around seven years old when it felt like consciousness was like just exploded in everything. Like I became so hyper-present of the fact that I'm real and I put my arms out and I wiggled my fingers and I was so, I was so blown away at like, what is this thing? Why am I here? Is everybody a robot? Is this just a big game? Like what is the fabric of this thing? Because as far as I know, billions or trillions of years, maybe an infinite amount of time has gone by and I wasn't sitting around in a black, dark waiting room waiting to be born. Now I'm just here. Why is it the way that it is? That's always fascinated me. And so we were born and we don't get to choose our parents, right? That's what it's like. We all, there's a there's a there's a random stroke of RNG. And we don't get to choose our parents, we don't get to choose our environment, we don't get to choose where we live, we don't get to choose our base architecture, we don't get to choose that base architecture. We're pretty much at the win of our environment, our family, our mom, our dad, our caretakers. And through the experiences or through the evolution of ages of zero to about seven years old, the human goes through a very sensitive learning and calibration period where it is learning how to literally do everything. It is learning how to interpret. It is learning language. It's learning how to walk. It's learning how to move. It's learning patterns and programs based off of culture and the the this structure that we've built, which is simply just comprised of other humans ideas of what's acceptable and what's not acceptable. And during these early very very formative years, we have a very sensitive nervous system and we have a limited context of reality. We have a very small map and a small window of tolerance to handle anything that's basically not love safety and connection. And through this process, what happens is we all experience either big T or little T trauma. Doesn't matter if you came from a perfect family, white picket fans, you know, you guys had dinner together every night. Like it's just it's impossible for a human to get like a perfect design. Right? Like something something's going to happen where somebody's going to come short or fall short, we're going to make mistakes, we're going to get reprimanded, we're going to get laughed at, we're going to get rejected, we're going to feel shame, we're going to get embarrassed, we're something's going to happen at school, we're going to get picked on, you know, our coaches going to call us out, like something's going to happen. And what happens is through this really sensitive early developmental period where we are literally taking everything on as fact. That's what children do, right? Because they don't have an expanded level of consciousness with enough context to understand like the separation of other people and why other people do things or make decisions. Children take everything literally and personally. So they believe that they're the center of the universe because in their own mind and level of consciousness they are. So when we experience pains and challenges, whether it's at home or at school, right? We experience these big-tier little T traumas. These things get programmed in because if we don't have an adult to help us interpret and navigate this disconnection, this lack of safety, this fear, this anxiety, this pain, if we're not able to fully regulate our system when it goes into fight or flight and we're not able to regulate our system back down to safety, think of that cycle no longer being able to complete. Therefore what happens is our brain takes a snapshot of that experience, it records it, it's like, hey, right? This is just what the brain does after tens of thousands of years, millions of years of biology. Our brain is a threat detection system in this three-dimensional environment and there are certain patterns and programs at play that are just all designed for survival. And one of the main goals of the brain is to protect you from pain because it believes that if it protects you from pain, then it is going to give you a better chance of survival and that is evident and true, right? It's like if you just look at our history, right? If we go hunting and there's a huge, you know, a bushel of berries, but then right next to it there's this huge pride of lions, right? Like what decision do you think the brain is going to make? Is it going to go for the berries and possibly take on the potential pain of dying or getting your, you know, your arm bit off? Or is it going to say, hey, we should should avoid these berries because there's potential pain there. And so take that analogy and now look at your life and look at all the experiences that you've had and everything your parents have told you and the way they've reprimanded you and what your brothers and sisters did to you and what your friends did to you and the relationships that you had and the experiences, right? When these things go unprocessed, they become like a filter, they become a program in our mind that acts as a filter. So in every moment through our five senses, we're taking in millions of bits of data through our site, through sound, through taste, through the energetic sense of what we feel around other people and through smell. And that information unconsciously, every second is being filtered through all past experiences, through anything that might be closely familiar to it, all of our beliefs, all of our values, our identity, our paradigms. And then from that moment, we then unconsciously, infractions of a second, make an assessment around sort of what the best course of action is and then it produces a feeling, right? And then from that feeling, there's an action or a behavior that's produced. This is what you learn inside of Neuralinguistic Programming, which is an incredibly powerful therapeutic model for change work, trauma work, dismantling, limiting beliefs, healing your inner child, reconciled dating, reprocessing memories, changing the fabric of the way that you use language. And it's wildly, wildly powerful. And it's much of, you know, there's a lot of its architecture is woven into SDC in the program and it's so wildly powerful for so many people. So, right, we have these experiences, they create a filter. That emotional sort of response that we had from that big tier little tea trauma, call it fear, anxiety, self-doubt, I'm not good enough, I'm not worthy enough, I'm not lovable, I have to be a people pleaser, I have to go above and beyond, I have to overcompensate, whatever those sensations are, those also get stuck in our body, right? And so now we go out and we've built all of these patterns and programs, hundreds of them, thousands of them, that we unconsciously practice over and over and over and over and over and over again as we confront the world and meet new people and have new experiences and those experiences, some way somehow in some shape or form, resemble those past experiences and so they're constantly re-triggered. And it begins to form our personality, right? What's really important to understand is that if you want to begin to change and transform your life, you're going to have to begin to change and transform your personality. And for some people, you might hear that and be resistant to it. But here's what you have to understand. When you really begin to understand the human operating system and consciousness, very important to understand that like, it's time that you, you, especially, like if you've got stuff that you're trying to rework and reintegrate and disintegrate and you want change and transformation, stop taking so much ownership of who you are. Stop taking so much ownership of who you are because who you are, the you that you feel like is you that you grasp onto is nothing more than a representation of the, of the modeling that you've taken from other people, right? You learned language from somebody else. You learned math from somebody else. You learned about any topic that you know about from somebody else. And so like to hold on to your personality is the ego. It's the ego trying to protect you and keep you safe and keep, keep you close to the, to the comfortable and to the familiar and to the known. But understand that like, if you want to achieve your dreams, if you want to achieve your goals, if you want to become the person somewhere that you can sense in your heart and soul that you know somehow, you don't know how, but like, you know somehow like that's destined for you. Dude, it is totally on the other side of what's known, say, familiar and comfortable. It lies in uncertainty. It lies in unmanifest potential. It lies in a totally different part of life that you haven't tapped into yet. And so I talk about courage all the time. You have to develop the courage to move into the gap of the uncertainty and the unknown to allow this vibrational system to begin to recalibrate into something else. Because if you keep doing the same things over and over and over again, while it feels safe, while it seems like in the short term, it's helping you, it's destroying you. It's destroying you and it's keeping you the same and it's not allowing you to heal and it's not allowing you to change and it's not allowing you to transform into your potential, which is why you're here on earth. If life was not about fulfilling your potential, there would be no college. There would be no higher education. There would be no financial and monetary system in a free market capitalistic based system for people to innovate and to get better and to try to become more resourceful and more creative and to solve problems. That is the whole point of biological evolution is to move towards increased complexity and novelty and ultimately towards, really, when you look at it from a very deep spiritual point of view, it's moving through an upward evolutionary path of consciousness that's ultimately leading towards higher and higher frequencies of unity, love, connection, harmony, joy, and really, like unity or enlightenment. Why does religion exist? Why does spirituality exist? Why has this been a fundamental framework from the beginning of time in human evolution? It's like, what are we searching for? We're searching for connection. We're searching for unity. We're trying to get back to the source of what all this is about. Right? And I don't want to get, like, I don't know where my listener stands on spirituality or God or if you're religious or if you're not religious. And I don't want any of this to turn you off. Like it's really important that whatever your worldview and model is, that's beautiful. Like, replace the word source, universe, God, if you want to call them Jesus, if you want to call them Muhammad or Buddha or whatever you want to do. It's totally up to you. It's the same. It's the same. Right? So, we go through this process. We incur all this programming. And then we're into our teens. And if we're an individual who had a base architecture that had a lot more pain and challenge and disconnection, big to your little T trauma, we have a higher predisposition towards addiction. And here's why. When you're evolving through those early formative years in your brain is forming, right? The circuitry, the neural circuitry of your brain in your nervous system is forming. If you have a lot of uncertainty and a lot of pain and a lot of negativity and all that type of stuff, the circuits in your brain in the way that, and here's how I've come to understand it, in the way that your brain, like secrets, neurotransmitters, like serotonin and dopamine and GABA and oxytocin and things like that, in the way that your nervous system responds to the environment and responds to the programming of, "I'm not good enough. I'm not lovable. There's something wrong with me. I'm not deserving. I'm not worthy. I could never do that." Right? So, I'm operating in lower frequencies because of that unresolved and unintegrated architecture of trauma and pain. Our frequency is going to be lower. Therefore, our brain isn't going to be producing maybe as much serotonin, which is responsible for kind of having you feel happy or joy. It's not going to be producing as much dopamine, which is responsible for that feeling of motivation towards the worthy pursuit of meaning and connection and goals and purpose. That's also tied to that feeling of anticipation towards like, "Hey, I'm about to hit a goal. Let me work a little bit harder. Let me get a little closer to it." Then also that reward that you get when you hit the goal. It might not be producing as much GABA, which is the neurotransmitter that calms you down and makes your nervous system feel more calm and sedated, which alcohol produces GABA and dopamine. When we, for those of us who grew up in environments that lowered our frequency, when we discover alcohol in our teens or in our 20s, it is fucking the best thing we've ever found. And for the first time in our life, we get to go. Oh, wow, this feels amazing, right? Because we've been living our life in a state of stress, in a state of fear, in a state of anxiety, in a state of fight or flight, in a state where we've been inhibited, where we've been fearful of taking risks, where we have been afraid of going towards our goals, where we have known and wanted and desired to move through and express ourself in a certain way, but felt fear and limitation and judgment and shame and guilt for doing it, because what if we did and there was painful repercussions, right? Just like there was in the past when we tried. So we experienced alcohol and alcohols like, "Oh, dude, this is fucking amazing." I get this huge rush of dopamine, I start to feel uninhibited, I start to feel relaxed, my pain, my stressors, my job, my work, my relationship, my kids. Oh my God, amazing. This is the best thing I've ever found. And as we continue that relationship, guess what happens? Well, first and foremost, we stop growing. So all of that past architecture, you're programming, the patterns, the beliefs, about yourself, about the world, the relationship you have with yourself, the way that you interpret your mind, the stories that you tell yourself, the way that you talk to yourself about what's good, what's bad, what's possible, what's not possible, the way that you predict what might happen. If I do this, then that's gonna happen. If I try that, then that's gonna happen, right? All based in lower frequencies of shame, of guilt, of apathy, of depression, of anxiety, of fear, right? Hopelessness, right? Impossibility, unworthiness, not good enough, not strong enough, don't have it, I'm not cut out for it, don't have the skills for it, it's gonna be too hard, it's gonna require too much risk, I'm gonna have to, whatever, right? Lower frequencies. And so what happens is, through this developmental process, we stunt our growth. So we just keep drinking, we keep drinking in high school, then we drink into our 20s, and we go to college, and we get really, really good drinking, and then we maybe find a job or a career into our 20s, and then into our 30s, and then maybe we get into a relationship, maybe we get married, maybe we have kids. And guess what? At what point, at what point in our human evolution, do we have an initiation process to go from child to adolescence? To go from adolescent to young adult. To go from young adult to fully mature adult. There is no initiation process. We are all willy fucking nilly, going through the motions, trying to figure it out, while being bombarded from every angle, from every show of every newscast, from every movie we watch, from every friend that we have, from everything, we are being programmed. We are being programmed. I want to remind you that you, who you think you are, you, like, is nothing more, and don't take this personally. Like this is just like waking up to the raw facts. Human beings, what this human avatar is at a fundamental level, is a data processing unit. You are a conscious witness that has a brain that learns things, interprets that, takes that on, and then applies them, and then you have a feedback system called your feelings and emotions that produce sensations in your body. That's it. Who you are, who I am, is a representation of all the data that I've taken in. From the books that I've read to the people that I've listened to, to my own personal experience, how I've synthesized them, the stories that I tell myself about myself, about the world, movies that I watch. We're constantly shifting. We're constantly changing in every second, in every moment, with every breath, with every step that we take forward. We are changing. We are not these static individuals. You take on new information that goes into the file system. You do something with it, and then you update your memory, or you update the program, or you change your idea, or you change your beliefs, or you don't, or maybe it reinforces what you already thought, or you already believed. When we start drinking alcohol, it halts our evolution. That's why I say it's procrastination against your personal evolution. When we go into life, and we start to use alcohol as something to, we begin to outsource to alcohol something that we're missing internally. If we're missing how to manage our stress internally, we don't know how to do that. When the overwhelm of the sensation starts to flood our body, and we don't know how to breathe through it, and we go into a state of panic, and we catastrophize that sensation, and we say, "I just need to fucking shut this off. I can't take it. It's going to last forever." I don't know what to do. When we outsource the management of that stress, or loneliness, oh my God, I'm so lonely. Nobody loves me anymore. I made so many mistakes. I fucked up the relationship that I had. I'm bad at making friends, but what value do I have to bring to other people? I don't know what to talk about. I don't know what to say. Or we outsource to alcohol. Maybe our social anxiety. We end up in a social environment where people are hanging out and talking and doing their thing, and it's like, "I just don't know. It doesn't feel good to go up and just say, "Hi, and introduce myself." Because what if this person looks at me and asks me about who I am? And it's, I don't know. Whatever it might be. Maybe it's, you know, pain from somebody passing. Maybe it's, you know, confusion about your life path. Maybe you know that you want to go west, but like everything in your life is structured for you to go east or north or south. And you feel frozen and overwhelmed by the fact that, like, somewhere deep down in your heart and soul, you know that you want to go this way, but like your life is set up in a way where it's like, dude, to start going east is like, or starting to go this other way is going to require a lot. And that's too much for you to handle. So you num it out. You outsource that change to alcohol because you don't have the courage in the present moment to meet those parts of yourself and to begin enacting the change one tiny micro step at a time. So what happens is throughout our evolution through our 20s or 30s or 40s, 50s, 60s, whatever it is, right? We are outsourcing to alcohol all of these different things. And alcohol is like, sure, yeah, awesome. I'll manage your stress. I'll help you forget about the job that you don't like. I'll help you numb out to the fact that you feel like you lack purpose and direction in your life. I'll help you numb out to the fact that you're in this relationship that you're actually not in love in anymore. And you don't have the courage to have the hard conversation yet, like for sure. I'll help you forget about it. But then you do that and guess what? Alcohol seems to work for 30 minutes or an hour or a couple hours or maybe an evening. But then you wake up the next day and you're having to pay back so much more than alcohol gave you in that moment. You now have brain fog. You've got shame. You've got guilt. The way you probably showed up during that time was out of alignment, out of character. You showed up in ways. You said things. You behaved in ways that maybe crossed your personal boundaries that crossed other people's personal boundaries. And now you're left with that residue. And guess what happens to your frequency? Guess what happens to your vibration? You are now operating through shame and guilt and depression and resistance and fear and anxiety and self-doubt, right? So it lowers your frequency and guess what? If your frequency is the total culmination of your energy system, primarily the way that you interpret, navigate and use your mind and the way that you interpret and feel sensations in your body, your frequency is now lower. And now guess what? When you're in the present moment, right now is you're listening to this and you think about your future, right? And you're trying to move into a future that hopefully is like a more ideal outcome where you're growing and evolving and fulfilling your potential and moving towards goals. How are you going to do that when you are in a lower frequency? It's going to be way harder to do that. You're not going to be able to go out and be as clear and as productive and as proactive and as aligned and as creative as you can be when you're in a lower frequency of shame. And guilt. The quality of your thoughts are a representation. They're a mirror to your energy, your energy being your frequency, being the state of your feelings and your emotions, right? That's why when you're in a state of joy and excitement when you're on a vacation or you just got a raise, everything is expansive. You have a good relationship with yourself. feeling proud, you're feeling confident, you're looking at yourself and you're appreciating the skills that you have and the value that you bring and your quality of communication is different and the tonality is different and the way that you show up with your kids or your partner or your friends is a totally different frequency. It's expanded, it's rooted in possibility, it's rooted in growth, it's rooted in moving up the conscious vibrations towards love and unity and connection with your friends and your family and potential and opportunity and possibility. And when you're not in that frequency, when you're in shame, when you're in guilt, when you're in fear, when you're in self doubt, when you're in a feeling of hopelessness and negativity and unworthiness, well then guess what? What-- how do you think your thoughts are going to reflect that? How do you think your tonality with your wife or husband is going to reflect that? How do you think the choice of words in language you use to your children or to your teens or through your adult child, how is it going to reflect that? Your frequency is everything. And I know this might sound like, "Barty, where is this coming from? This is different from everything else you've talked about. It's like, this is what it comes down to. This is what it comes down to. All this work that we're doing, changing our minds, that changing our beliefs, upgrading, the way that we interface with ourselves, letting go of bad habits, optimizing our routines, improving our communication. It's all coming down to what is the energetic frequency? What is the vibration? Is it a low vibration that's rooted in these lower frequencies or is it in higher vibration rooted in these higher frequencies? And when you begin to understand this, everything starts to make a lot more sense. Why are people with trauma more predisposed to addiction in dysfunctional patterns? It's because the way that you interpret an interface with your mind and the patterns and programs that are running, the architectural language models that are running inside, that voice inside of your head, are more limited, they're more negative, they're more disempowering. They're by your nervous system responding to those, creating a lower frequency of depression, or anxiety, or limitation, or self-doubt. Thereby, you don't feel empowered. Thereby, you don't feel confident. Thereby, you feel more insecure. Thereby, you have lower self-esteem. Thereby, you're not truly connected to your worth and your value and your power. Thereby, that feels out of alignment for you and you don't understand the path and process to begin to heal and reintegrate and optimize your life. Thereby, the system overloads and red lines and you've got these pins and needles and sensations in your body that you don't know how to manage otherwise so you say, "Fuck it and you drink." And then every time you drink, it produces almost as much dopamine as cocaine. And with enough time, you get caught in the dopamine feeding cycle because every time you drink, you get better at drinking. It's just how it is. That's what dopamine does. Anything that produces dopamine is reinforcing. It's reinforcing. So whatever produces dopamine, you're getting better at doing that thing without knowing it. And this is the big fucking lie. This is the nonsense of this system. This is how we've all been duped into drinking alcohol. Yeah, it's great. Party, relax. Have fun. It's part of the end game. It's what wealthy people do. Relax, sit down. Have a $10,000 bottle of wine. It's great. Meanwhile, it's lowering your frequency. It's siphoning your life force. It's giving you brain fog. It's disrupting the way that you prioritize and manage, like, in feel motivation. Right? And it's like, when you think about that and you think about this system and how they've architected it to keep that out of your awareness and to keep you living in this tiny looping short term cycle of what's the term? This tiny short term cycle of immediate gratification. You begin to see that it's just mass manipulation. It's mass manipulation. They're exposing everybody to this marketing that says, hey, do this. It's great. It's have fun. Don't worry. You've worked hard. Just have one after work. You're good. You're fine. Celebrate. It's chill. Meanwhile, they're literally like wiring our system for short term gratification. And if you know anything about what it takes to succeed in life, you understand the first principle of it is that you have to learn delayed gratification. Do you want like a very overly simplified and generalized explanation of like the journey of overcoming alcohol or addiction? Is you're learning delayed gratification? There's no way around it. OK? Every single person who's listening to this podcast, myself, any person who has ever been addicted to anything or had a problematic dysfunctional relationship with anything who has gotten sober, who has quit that substance, has to develop the courage to remain present in that loop, in that moment where you want to instantly gratify towards pleasure or to the relief of pain and you have to sit in that gap. OK? The buck is going to have to stop. There's going to be a moment where there's a program and a pattern and a trigger that you've practiced over and over and over and over again. It's a sunny day out. It's Saturday. Oh, it's evening time. Oh, I'm cooking dinner. Oh, I'm out with my friends. Oh, I'm on the boat. Oh, I'm about to play golf. Oh, I'm about to watch the game. Oh, but I'm in Vegas. Oh, but it's 9 o'clock and I need to put the kids to bed. Oh, I need to get to sleep. Oh, we're in another argument again about the same thing. There's going to be a moment where that trigger hits and your neurochemistry and your nervous system is going to flood your body with all these thoughts and sensations and you're going to have to pause. You're going to have to say, OK, what I would normally do is go out and drink. What I would normally do is pour a glass. What I would normally do is this. And I really want to do it. I really want to do it right now. I can just-- I'm feeling for it. I'm salivating for it. I'm itching for it. But guess what? You have to learn how to sit in that. That is your mental, emotional, spiritual maturity. That is where your growth as a human being develops is by acknowledging that gap, that moment where you would normally go do it and you sit in it. And then you apply tools and strategies that you learn in my program. And you can learn in other places to cope through that process. What does it mean to cope? I've talked about this before. To cope means to bear. We hear this all the time. You got to learn coping strategies. You got to learn to cope. And people think there's some magic coping strategy. There's no coping-- there's no magic coping strategy. What some one person uses a way to cope might really work for them. For another person, it might be totally different. To cope just means to bear. You're bearing the load. You're shouldering the discomfort. You're shouldering the sensation, allowing it to pass, allowing it to change and transform and become something else. Which is what this experience of life is, is it's change. The only constant, the only permanent, the only thing that you can absolutely rely on is that life is change. Your thoughts are constantly changing. On average, we have 60 to 90,000 thoughts a day. You think about your email, then you think about feeding your dog, then you think about what you're going to wear, then you think about how much traffic they're going to be. Then you're going to wonder if you've got to go to the grocery store now or later. Then you got to worry about and think about this or that. It's just, dude, it's always going. One thought to the next. And by the time the third thought passes or comes, you forgot about what the other thought was. It's as if it didn't exist anymore. So it's always changing and learning to become the witness of your operating system, learning to step back and become the conscious observer of your mind and to become the witness to the sensation that fluctuates. Learning how to create distance between these two modes of our internal experience is what we're doing here. Because up until this point, we have been living in autopilot fully identified as the voice inside of my head. That is me fully identified as the sensation that I'm experiencing right now. And that's why we catastrophize it. Because we believe we are that thing rather than the witness of it. And as you learn how to become the witness of it, as you learn how to take a step back, as you learn to pause, as you learn to observe, that gap, That gap is where everything in your life begins to change. That gap is where everything begins to transform because now what you're doing is you're pulling out of the programs and you are becoming the one who can observe. You're becoming the one who is sovereign and can choose a new response rather than being the autopilot program of the old reaction. And this is the fundamental basis of how we change, of how we heal and how we transform and how we learn how to reclaim our sovereignty and power as human beings. Because up until this point we've been running on programs, we've been running on patterns. That's what this biological system does. It's geared for survival, it's geared for safety, it's geared for comfort, it's geared for doing just enough to get by until we have to go out and do something again. And when you begin to connect all these dots and understand this, it starts to make much more sense. I want to reiterate and remind you that the way that you feel right now, if you're struggling with alcohol listening to my podcast, the way that you think this process of quitting drinking is going to be is not how it's going to be for the rest of your life. Listen, when I was, I mean, you know my story. My dad died of alcohol poisoning when I was 14 years old. I grew up in an environment with immense amounts of instability and trauma of all kinds. And the very first time I picked up alcohol, it wasn't even a question. I was, I was, in alcoholic. I was never the type who could just have one. Every time I would have one, a switch would go off and I would have 10 to 15. And I started going to A meetings and I was 18 or 19. I've been to over a hundred of them. Never made sense. Never clicked. Never taught me anything of substance or of value. Their entire model and paradigm just seemed ridiculous to me. But bless all those who it works for. And tried dozens and dozens and dozens and dozens of times to stop throughout my 20s. And I would get a week. I'd get a couple weeks. I'd get a couple months. The longest I went with six months. And then fell right back into drinking because I gave into that voice though, it was like, hey, it's been six months. You're doing great. Things will be different this time. Just, you know, keep it chill. Keep it chill. Like manage it. Come on. It's like, all right, two weeks into it, right back into drinking. How I was. And then COVID hits and I get up to drinking every day and I start drinking four to six bottles of wine a day. Most of the people that come into my program are drinking two to six drinks a day, two to maybe 10 drinks a day at the high end. Some are more binge drinkers and they're drinking, you know, a couple days a week. And, you know, when I injured my shoulder in the pool and my left shoulder was upside down, mangled. And I was in the most excruciating pain of my life. And I realized like, okay, like I played the tape forward in both scenarios and I recognized like if I like, if I don't stop drinking, I'm going to die in early death and I'm going to die without fulfilling my potential. And if I'm able to figure out how to stop drinking, I think I'll figure this thing out. I think I'll figure life out and like things will get better. Like, you know, and in that moment, man, when I was in the pool and I was like reflecting on playing my life all the way through and it's in its movie, you know, and like as I sat there, the thought and idea of quitting drinking was unfathomable, unfathomable. I was so used to the feeling of alcohol. I was so used to the routines and rituals that I had. I was so used to the comfort of knowing that I could pour a drink whenever I wanted. I was so used to the feeling of the dopamine of the reward of the euphoria of the relaxation of my ability to just disconnect and let go and forget about whatever was happening in my life, whether it was conscious in the present moment or just shit from my past and my programming that was creating dysregulation and creating my paradigm that I wasn't even aware of. And I truly thought it 29 years old when I quit drinking. I was like, all right, I mean, that's it. Like, yeah, I'll be sober, but my life is over. It's not going to be fun anymore. It's going to be boring. I'm going to be constantly missing out. I'm probably going to have cravings forever and constantly thinking that I'm going to be filtering every experience through alcohol and constantly missing it. And every time I go to dinner, hang out with somebody, I'm going to be wishing I was drinking and dude, I experienced that so deeply, so deeply. So I get it. I get it. If that's where you are right now, you're like, "Bardia, a lot of this sounds good." And alcohol has been fucking up my life and I want to stop, but I'm scared and I don't know how and what's my social life? How's that going to be? And are people going to judge me and think I have a problem and that I can't control it and are people going to look down on me? Like, dude, I experience all of that, all of it. And what I can promise you, like, think of me as a time traveler. If you've gotten any level of value from my words and you're like, "There's something here. Please trust me when I say that what you think quitting drinking is, it's wildly different than what you can begin to imagine. The fears, the anxieties, the worries, how am I going to do it, how am I going to survive? It's like, you know, how am I going to deal with it? Like, it's not like that forever. It's not like that forever. The reason your paradigm is the way that it is right now is because you're operating from a frequency and from a place where you've been living an autopilot with this, with a certain level of conditioning of your mind, your neurochemistry, your nervous system, the way that you interpret yourself, the way that you talk to yourself, the way that you interpret and navigate your feelings and emotions, the relationship that you have with the world and people and like, it's you're operating from a fairly limited scope in this moment. And so, when you continue down this path and you do the work and you work a good program, I promise you, I promise you that it all changes not only for the better, but in the most beautiful ways that you actually like it, like I'm not bullshitting you when I say this, you conceptually can't conceive it yet. It is outside your frame of reference. It's outside of, it's like you've heard that saying, you don't know what you don't know, right? If there was some ancient fact about India, about some ruler that I don't know about, I just made that up, but it wasn't in my consciousness, it wasn't even on my radar to be able to come up with that. It's like, it's, you know, it's probably a terrible example, but it's like, the way that your life will begin to change and transform is outside of the scope of the realm of what you can even tap into and it gets infinitely better, infinitely better. Your neurochemistry heals, your dopamine recovers. The way that you begin to live your life in your habits and your lifestyles and your routines improves. Your memories can begin to change. There is strategies and tools inside of the program, inside of neuro-linguistic programming, these other things that can actually reprocess and reintegrate the way that you respond to memories, the way that you respond to ideas, to thoughts, to move energy through your body, to change the fabric of your nervous system, to change it from a sympathetic and fight-or-flight or free-state to a more sympathetic, calm and relaxed and peaceful and equanimous state. So understand that like, this journey, it's, it's, dude, it's so wild. And you can probably tell from like, just like the energy of my voice and the tone that I'm carrying is I'm coming into this podcast, it's been a little while since you've probably heard my voice, is that like, should it's changing, man? And it's changing in the best ways and in the most beautiful ways. And the relationship that I have with the universe, call it God-sourced creator, animating intelligence, the stars, I don't care what you call it, it doesn't matter to me. It has become so like aligned and so beautiful that I mean, you've heard me say this again, it's like, dude, it's, it's the gift that keeps on giving. When you learn how to evolve out of alcohol, vibrationally through your consciousness, and you begin to see and understand what alcohol is and what it represents through the human evolutionary, spiritual development process and maturity. process. You just begin to see it for what it is. And the thought and idea of going back or craving it or wanting it or thinking I'm missing out of anybody who's in alcohol culture is like it's as insane as me just driving my car off a cliff. That doesn't even compute. It doesn't register. And this is coming from somebody who is just like you. This is coming from somebody who gets it. Who is drinking four to six bottles of wine a day, 15 year bin drinker, alcoholism runs in the family. I was the worst of them all. I was the biggest fiend of them all. And this journey and what's happened and how life is unfolded as a result of me taking it one day at a time, staying committed to my growth, to my healing, to honesty, to radical transparency and truth and making an effort to expand, making an effort to stay close to my heart and soul and my guidance and my intuition and just trying to not only better myself, but better every single person I come into contact with, every single person I exchange energy with. Whether it's in my communication with them, whether it's how I hold space in my presence and the way that I look at them in their eyes, the way that I support them, the way that I guide them, the way that I remind them of who they truly are. Like my mission on earth is to use my talents and my gifts and to be a conduit of energetic transfer. And like I'm just a vessel. I'm just a vessel. And my mission is to help people evolve vibrationally out of alcohol and to fulfill their potential. That is why I'm here. There's no other major reason. Like stop drinking coach and this thing that I've built, this program, this podcast, the content that I put out, it is to help you and to remind you of who you are, to help you remember before the patterns, before the programs, before the trauma, before all that nonsense, dimmed your light, dimmed your shine, made you believe that you were less than, not capable, not worthy, not good enough, not smart enough, that you had to be more than who you actually are. That made you fearful of being your most vibrant authentic self in sharing your truth and expressing your truth with the world. Because when we remove alcohol, that's what opens up. Truth, the truth starts to come forward. Your truth, my truth. And truth is equivalent to love and love, I think, is equivalent to God or the universe. I think that that's one of the highest frequencies. In fact, I saw something on social media the other day and they said, actually, the highest frequency, even above love, is authenticity. And I'm like, damn, that's true. Because when you meet somebody and you can tell like they're genuine and they're authentic and you can feel that energy, there is something magnetic about it. There's something about it that you want to get closer to it. You want to align to it. You want that transfer of energy and you, you, you, we all crave and desire truth and authenticity and genuineness, right? Like there's that, that somehow in the biological programming is good for survival. It's good for evolution and removing alcohol from your life and developing the courage to simply start to confront and be present to your old programming that is going to bring up some pain and discomfort for a while, right? That eventually, as you cope through it and become more resilient and increase your window of tolerance to stress and learn how to re-regulate your neurotransmitters and, you know, improve your mental regulation, improve your emotional regulation, develop a better and healthier relationship with your own mind and get better at navigating and like connecting to your intuition and making better decisions, compound it over months and months and months and months. Like that is going to lead to more authenticity, to more truth. And it's going to make your life in every sense of the word so much better, so much more connected, so much more fulfilled, so much more vibrant. And it's like, dude, that's what we want. That's what we were searching for through alcohol. You were searching for peace. You were searching for connection. You were searching for stress relief. You were searching for confidence. You were searching for love. You were searching for capability, risk taking, like whatever it was. And so whatever you were outsourcing to alcohol, you have the ability to resource within yourself. And that's why we're here on Earth. This is our maturity process. This is our mental, emotional and spiritual growth process. You're not just here to fucking have a job. You're not just here to pop out some kids. You're not just here to raise kids. You're not just here to pay bills. You're not just here to watch Netflix and order shit on Amazon. You are here to discover and to create an architect your dream. Like, what's a better pursuit? What's a better endeavor than that? Who knows how much time you have left, how much time I have left. And as far as we know, we go back into the void from which we came. So how much longer are you going to procrastinate because you don't want to feel fucking craving? How much longer are you going to procrastinate because you think that you're destined to be fucking lonely forever instead of going out and meeting some people, even though you've got pins and needles in your body. How much longer are you going to put it off? Because dude, time is flying. At one point, if you're lucky enough to be in a moment where like you're reflecting on this life that you've been gifted with, blessed with, with your heart and your soul and your upper, like, skills and opportunities and what makes you uniquely you, what makes you uniquely passionate in the way that you are with the way that you can give love and help and support and guide and create. And if you're reflecting on it and like, you're looking back and you're like, "Fuckin, I didn't do it. I was too scared. I let that one experience fucking dictate the rest of my life. I let that person who hurt me, control me for the next 10, 20, 40, 50 years. I let them own me because I was not willing to forgive them or myself. I was not willing to temporarily re-experience that pain in a safe controlled environment with either therapists or coaches or, you know, someone else to process through it and to move that energy through my body and to move on. Like how much longer are you going to keep playing the same fucking game that you've always known?" You know? Like, dude, at some point you've got to say enough is enough. You've got to wake up. See it for what it is, dude. Alcohol is not. It is not what they made it out to be. And you know that. You feel that. It's nonsense. And so maybe you're at a place in your life where it's like, dude, it's time to reprioritize. Maybe your values were, I'm going to do enough to get by, I'm going to pay my bills, and then I'm just going to have fun. I'm going to do enough to get by, I'm going to pay my bills, and then I'm just going to go out. Like maybe it's time through your maturity process to remove fun from number three to number six. Maybe it's time to change the way that you look at discomfort. And instead of looking at it as this catastrophic thing that I have to avoid, to look at it as like a necessary part of your evolutionary and adaptation process, it is necessary. The only way that we grow and evolve and get better and get closer to our dreams is through discomfort by actually experiencing and being in the discomfort. That is what allows adaptation to occur. Just look at nature. Just look at what happens when you go to the gym. You voluntarily expose yourself to discomfort when you work out and when you run. And what does that do? It strengthens your heart. It makes your cells more efficient. It produces energy. It expands your blood vessels. Your brain doesn't atrophy as fast. Your muscles get bigger. You physically become more attractive as a human being to other human beings thereby increasing your dating or sexual market value so that you can get an attract and be with an even more desirable, healthy partner to optimize your longevity by pursuing discomfort, by allowing yourself to be in the courage of being in that gap of discomfort temporarily. But guess what? That discomfort isn't for the rest of your life. You become more resilient. Just like when you go to the gym and you work out the first four to six weeks, your muscles burn and it sucks and you hate being there. But guess what? Six months in, you've put an inch on your biceps, you've lost 25 pounds, your abs are visibly visible, and you've got more endurance and you have less back pain and you can move better and you don't get as winded and as tired. By voluntarily exposing yourself to the discomfort and our journey of sobriety, of coping with alcohol because we were afraid of confronting the truth of our own life is the same way. Maybe your loss, maybe your confused, maybe you hit your job, maybe it's time for you to move into a different relationship, maybe it's time for you to move into a new career, maybe it's time for you to have a conversation with your mom or dad who hurt you, maybe it's time to let things go and learn about forgiveness. Maybe it's time for you to trust yourself more, to trust your own gifts, to trust your own skills and your own talents and to take a bet on yourself and to start that business. Whatever it is, we're each on our own unique personal and spiritual journey and if it's calling you and you feel it, it's your responsibility to do it. And trust the process and trust the process. And if you're fearful of doing it alone and you've tried doing it alone and you can't figure it out or it's too much or you don't know what the steps are, join a program. I'm telling you, I tried every which way. If you're listening to my podcast, you're like, "Dude, this guy seems like he has a relatively decent level of self-awareness in the things that he's saying seem good." Like, "I wasn't able to figure it out on my own." I tried every which way. But I was at a different level of consciousness then. I was not the same barge in any sense of the word. Sure, some of my base architecture, like my passion for growth and personal development and trying to become better, that was always there. But I was not at the same level of consciousness in any sense of the word. I didn't have the ability to synthesize and articulate the way that I do now. I wasn't able to interpret myself and my reality and my mind and my sensations. I had a limited map. I hadn't experienced enough life to know. And you might be 50 or 60 or 70 listening to this saying, "Well, Bardy, I'm twice, three times your age." Like, "I've experienced more life than you and I'm still struggling." And it's like, "Dude, that's why I'm telling you." There are layers to this thing that aren't just about how much money you make or where you live or how much prestige you have or what your career has been or whether you have a family or not. Like, it's, dude, this is a different, this is going inward. This isn't the outward physical manifestation of the work that you've put into generate revenue or start a business or a family. This is the inward journey. And again, not to get like too spiritual here, but it's like, you look at every, every living master or profit who is written in books. I mean, I don't know how many books you're written in, but like every person who our cultural society deemed important enough, they all said, like, stop looking outside of yourself and begin the journey inward. And that's what this journey is about. And I can promise you that it's more beautiful than you can begin to imagine. You just have to have the courage to start. And the beautiful thing about this journey is that as you begin to heal, as you begin to increase your self-awareness, as you begin to let things go that no longer serve you, as you begin to optimize your life and your habits and your perspectives and your beliefs. These are like unlocks that when you move up the chain, when you move up the ladder, it's so much harder to go back down. It's so much harder to go back down. Like now in my life, if I'm met with discomfort, if I'm met with a curveball, there's no catastrophizing it like I did before. There's no red line activation of my nervous system that leads me to want to immediately numb it out. I take it with total surrender, with total acceptance and reverence that the universe is perfect, and that if this is happening, it's supposed to happen. And that whatever is here, I'm somehow supposed to experience it. And it's for me, and there's wisdom in it, and there's medicine in it, and there's something to learn from it. And there's an opportunity for me to take more ownership or awareness or accountability or responsibility to recognize whether this is something that I can maybe something I can do differently next time or put into place to avoid something like this happening again. And it becomes a, every moment becomes a sacred opportunity because the relationship I have and have developed with myself and have developed with the universe is one of harmony and acceptance and surrender and grace and truth and reverence and understanding and acceptance. So life doesn't have to be this battle. It's not a game of victimhood. It's not a game of that person did this and this is right and that's wrong and like I'm surrendered to it. And it would be virtually impossible to go back to that other side of things because I've increased my frequency, I've raised my, but my vibration, my baseline vibration operates through courage. And as I stay conscious and aware and intentional, I'm leaning into love and acceptance, enjoy and appreciation and gratitude as much as I can. And when I feel that, guess what? The quality of my thoughts and the possibilities of expansion and what life can become and how many people I can help, reflects that and mirrors that vibration. There's less doubt, there's less uncertainty. The path becomes more clear. I know what I need to do. I know who I need to call on. I know what I need to put into place. And knowing the systems and knowing that I have better management over my time and my intentions and my thoughts and the way that I use this avatar as a conscious witness of it, that's aware of how it operates and its mechanics. The time and distance between what I desire to call into my life and materializing that window gets smaller and smaller and smaller and things begin to happen faster and faster and faster. And the synchronicities that occur, which is like, I just recorded a video on my Instagram that's like, the results in your life is like 80% frequency and 20% execution. And when we understand frequency and how the universe is a mirror, the universe vibrationally matches and presents people and opportunities and things that match your frequency, it's like, I just have to keep being me at the highest level. I just keep having to lean into my gifts, to my truth, to my authenticity, to my genuineness and the universe handles the rest. Somebody reaches out to me. A new person comes into my life. A new opportunity presents itself. Like, I didn't do that. The universe brought that person in. But what I had to do was get myself to a place energetically by having the courage to go inward and do the work and commit to that process, to where I could raise my frequency enough to a place where life gets easier, life gets more harmonious. And so that's what we're doing here, my friends. Stop drinking, coach. It's not just a program to help you quit drinking. I am building what I believe and will eventually be seen, invalidated by others, to be the most powerful and successful, not only sobriety and alcohol recovery program, but personal transformation system. You know, I help people quit drinking, but what my passion is, the reason I'm here on earth, is to help you fulfill your potential. That is what, to me, is a worthy mission in purpose. That's why I get up every morning. That's why I do what I do. Because by doing that, it allows me to be of service to the collective, to humanity as a collective, to the collective. to the collective consciousness of humanity. And that is my part. That's my part. You know? I don't know how long we'll be here, hopefully, with AI and the way technology is advancing in the next 50 years. You know, I used to say I'll be around to LaMADI. I don't know, maybe I'll be around to 120, 150. We'll see. We can stop aging. That'd be cool. So I think I'm going to wrap things up there. If you've made it this far, thank you. I really, really appreciate you taking the time to listen to this transmission and to hear me and see me in my deepest level of personal truth. You know, short form content on TikTok and Instagram is cool. But when I record my podcast, I am operating in a different frequency. And I feel fortunate and grateful to be here and to share this with you. And if you've received it, thank you. I trust and hope that something that I shared with you inspired you or motivated you or is going to do something to improve the direction of your life somehow. And if you feel called to work with me either one-on-one or to join my group program, it's a year-long program designed to give you the systems, support, structure, path, resources, tools, accountability, community support, and weekly ongoing coaching for an entire year to help you achieve a year alcohol free. Go to my website, www.thustoptrinkingcoach.com, fill out an application and book a call directly with me. So yeah, I'm building some really new powerful things inside of SDC as of now. Everything, you know, with the launch of the group program, the last few months, everything has been going super, super well. The course that's inside there is absolutely incredible. But over the next kind of couple months here, I'm going to be working with Julian, my co-coach, and we're going to be going in and creating some truly next-level assets and guided experiences that just don't exist on planet Earth. Because I have such a broad understanding of so many different types of spiritual principles and different healing modalities. I'm going to be building these guided experiences that stack multiple modalities and things that will take you through these experiences that will completely like-- completely kind of like blow your consciousness in terms of like taking you through these experiences that will open doors that you didn't previously even know were inside you this whole time. So I'm super excited about that. And those assets are going to be really what separates SDC from everything else out there. And so yeah, share this podcast with somebody who you think might need to hear it. Share it on social media. If you listen to this podcast specifically and you enjoyed it, feel free to reach out to me on Instagram, shoot me a direct message, and just connect. My Instagram handle is @thestopdrinkingcoach. So yeah, I appreciate you listening. And I will see you in the next episode.