True Crime! Dr. Lindsay Kallen Weisner Returns (Again!)with "The Husband Did It"! (**note:not HER husband...)

Welcome to the Sherpa Shale on Mount Podcastia, where it's time for podcast picks with Jim the podcast Sherpa. You'll get to hear about podcast recommendations for your podcast playlist, along with occasional interviews with other podcasters and video hosts. Now, waiting for you to use your host, Jim the podcast Sherpa, he's just like you imagined. But don't worry, we'll make it up to you somehow. This week, on podcast picks with Jim the podcast Sherpa, Dr. Lindsay Callan Weisner returns for a third time to discuss her new true crime podcast, The Husband Did It. The Sherpa was telling Dr. Weisner that every time he drinks his tea, he gets a stabbing pain in his eye. She suggested that he should take the spoon out of his cup. Welcome to the Sherpa's podcast picks. It's the podcast about will podcast. And now, coming to you from Mount Podcastia, here's your host who wonders what's on your podcast playlist. Jim the podcast Sherpa. Hello there, rubble's of the Sherpa Lucien and welcome to podcast picks with Jim the podcast Sherpa. That is me coming to you from Sherpa Lucios here in the Sherpa Shale, Hire Top Mount Podcastia where I've looked at millions and millions of podcasts that are out there. I didn't expect that one. Well anyway, we are here. Another podcast or interview. Yes, I know you guys want podcast recommendations. And you know, I needed some guests and, you know what, I put out a little bit of a social media message to one of my friends who has actually been on this show before and she responded and actually did me a huge favor as well. The ladies that you heard a few weeks ago from the Nothing Untouched podcast were recommended to me by my guest today, Dr. Lindsay Callan was there and if that name sounds familiar, well, it should because she's actually been on the show twice and both times so much fun. She's great. She is definitely a show favorite as far as I am concerned. And the rest of the Sherpa Lou studio team is concerned as well. All those little Sherpa Lou studio players, the AER bots just go crazy over her. So before the interview started, Lindsay and I were playing catch up with each other's lives and Lindsay certainly has a lot in her life going on. And one of those things is a new podcast and it is called The Husband Did It. No, it's not a spouse blaming podcast, although that can get a lot of episodes I know. But a Chewcrime podcast of course and so well done. And as you know, she co-hosts with her friend Mark the Crimes of Long Island podcast. But this one, she's going national, she's going international. The husband did it all over the place and sometimes the boyfriend did it as she notes in our interview. So we definitely had a lot of fun talking it. She really brought up a lot of interesting things. You never know it, Lindsay. It's always exciting. She definitely brings some great viewpoints. Super smart lady. She is a clinical psychologist and also writes a lot of psychological publications as well. Fascinating things and that's how she likes to approach things especially with her podcast. So if you haven't heard her the first two times she's been on the show, you get to hear her today. As I said, a much beloved guest here in the Sherpa Shallae. Here's my chat with Dr. Lindsay Callan Weissner. To all the rebels we are in the Chewcrime adjacent room here in the Sherpa Shallae. My guest is a clinical psychologist who has written a book and many of her writing blogs have been featured in psychology today. She has hosted several podcasts. We're co-hosted. Direct nourishment. Crimes of Long Island and her latest one, which we're going to chat a little bit about. The husband did it. Our name is Dr. Lindsay, welcome back to the show. A favorite by the way. I hope your favorite show to go on. We always have so much fun and we did it during the pandemic. That's right. It's funny that you mentioned that because I'll tell you a little story. A little bit of trivia. In 1978, there was a movie that came out called same time next year. I believe it was based on a play. I think it was too. Right. The movie started Alan Ulzer and Oh, Alan Burston. Okay. Nice memory. And they played two people who were buried to other people and while they were away on vacation, they mean that they have an affair. Every year they go back and they revisit their lives and stuff. But the interesting thing about the movie isn't so much the fact that they're having an affair for all this time. It's that their life is moving onward and the way that they relate to each other is different and they become really like good friends. Oh, so it's like us almost because we keep running into each other again and again. Right. I mean, we met like you said right before COVID. Right before COVID. And your book was supposed to come out and then my book was supposed to come out in on March 18th and that was literally the week they shut everything down. Yeah. Yeah. A book came out but not with a bang, but a whisper. And then during COVID, when you have the clubs of Long Island and now. Yep. Here we are with COVID, hopefully. Oh, please knock on everything that won't echo our sound. But I'll invisibly knock on my head, kind of thing. Yeah. And now here we are again and hopefully COVID in the past and better things are in our future. That's right. We can only hope for that. I love it. I love it. So the husband did it. Now, it's interesting because it's a podcast. It's a spoiler alert and it's a title of a lifetime movie probably. Probably. It's called the husband did it because spoiler alert, the husband does it. Sometimes it's the boyfriend. But the reality is it's a trope for a reason. It often is the husband committing the crime. Yeah. And not as much the wife, not as much the wife. But we have so many, I mean, right now I think we have seven or eight episodes out, but we've recorded a whole bunch of them. And I'm very excited. My co-host Mark, who's hosting it with me, and I also did crimes of Long Island podcast, which we're bringing back again. So that's exciting. That's going to be coming out soon. And I'm just filled with excitement about all of these stories. Right now, one of the episodes that came out, it's about this man named David Hendricks. And he supposedly, because Mark and I are still undecided, but he was sent to jail for murdering his wife, two daughters and son. And it was a brutal murder too. But he was sent to jail, but we are both still sort of on the fence on about whether or not he did it. And so we don't go into it with blinders on. We go into it with curiosity for the cases. And in this case, I don't know, like he went to jail. And it was a brutal and it was awful, but he came out of jail. And I believe he'd be married, if I'm remembering correctly, and didn't kill anyone else. So I don't know. That's one where we're not sure the husband did it. But you know, it's a great, I mean, it's a horrible time to be in the true crime genre, because it's so oversaturated. But I think the nice thing is, Mark is really in touch with cars and history, both local where we are. And also, he gets into the history of whatever town or state we're exploring. And I bring the psychology. Yes. Okay. So that's going to lie. That's sort of my specialty. But you do it so well. I mean, you've been doing it for a long time. I've been doing it for a long time. I've been to psychologists for 20 years now. Wow. Congratulations. Thank you. I mean, I know I don't look a day older than 16. She does have a youthful appearance. I know this is a video and like they don't know, but they don't know. I don't know how old you are. And I would never obviously ask because I am turning 49. It wouldn't even guess it. No way. You wouldn't think a day over 48, right? Also, I realized now, you're doing this, you know, where the husband did it. Yeah. And you know, there's a murder. And like you said, and very often, he's like, oh, that's a thousand. Now, does your husband sleep with one eye open now? Oh, that's a great question. So, humorously, my husband is both a psychologist and he used to be a public defender. On a second date, we were supposed to meet and I called him and he answered the phone and said, I'm actually at a crime scene. Can I call you back? And I think that was when my panties dropped. I'm not going to lie. Now he's a psychologist at a hospital and he enjoys what he does. And I enjoy what I do, but he wants nothing to do with your crime. Okay. Like any documentary, because sometimes we'll watch documentaries, sometimes we'll do the pen and paper newspaper research. I prefer the latter mark prefers documentaries at times, but if I when I do have to watch documentaries, you know, have to twist my arm. I haven't refused this to watch it with me. Did he see a lot of like, did he ever try any murder cases when he was? No, he didn't try any murder cases, but that was not what he wanted to do with his time. I mean, he's, my husband is the nicest, smartest, most well-mannered man ever, as opposed to his blunt, swerry-wise. How long have you got married? Um, we actually have been married 21 years. 21 years? Wow. How about you? How long have you been married? 19. It'll be 19 this year, actually. Should I be you? No. You got married first. I got married first. Yeah. I don't remember. How did you and your wife meet? Can I ask? Oh, yeah. You worked with my sister. She didn't want to meet anybody, and I was kind of like, eh, and then we met and then we just plucked. Uh, that's so nice. My husband and I met in graduate school. We were both getting our doctorates in psychology. Uh, and the first day I met him, I told, um, one of my very close friends, uh, I said, I'd just met them and I'm going to marry. And she took my margarita away from me and told me I couldn't drink anymore. But she was the bridesmaid in our wedding, so there you go. And you were right, too. And I was right. Yeah. I'm, I'm, I'm right pretty often. Um, now that's going to be unique when two psychologists meet and fall in love. Do you, do you guys think that you overall has each other? Um, or you can keep that off to the side. It's not as unique as you would think. Um, we were, our graduating class had 15 people in them, and I married my husband. And then one other couple came from our class, and she spent five years with the same people. Um, you know, it's like five years with the same 15 people. Um, and then the class below us and the class above us also had people that got married each other in the program. Um, but it's one of these, uh, it's funny. It either works totally or doesn't work at all. My husband and I do very different psychology. Um, he's what we call cognitive behavioral. You know, he's like, you identify the action. You want to reduce the action. You, um, you know, reward and punishment and et cetera. Um, and this works for adults or children. And to me, I'm more like, how does your mother make you feel? Um, and so it's, and I actually did a postdoc in what's called psychoanalytic psychotherapy, which is like the couch and everything. Okay. So, um, that's more of my style and his style is slightly different. So although we share our business, we share an office space. Um, and, uh, we also share headaches at the end of the night. But we can't tell each other what our headaches are about because that would be breaking confidence. Yeah, it's more like, oh, my head is killing me from a long day. And we just have to look at each other and be like, wine. Not, not, not person fee, but person A. Yeah. Exactly. Exactly. So remain nameless and generous and, right, right. bedtime talk does not involve patients. I'll tell you that much. Yeah. But you know, I, I think also when you, when you're both in the same field, it's probably makes it easier to relate to each other. All so that you, you know what they're going through. Sometimes like when you don't know what a person does or, you know, you have come like a vague idea. Yeah. You don't know what the little intricacies of it, but, but both things like, I'll just, you know, yeah, and there are times where like, I'll ask his opinion on something or he'll ask my opinion on, like, name, no names were given. Um, we're not at the office at the same time. So we don't see each other's patients or anything. Um, I also do a lot of my work virtually these days. So, um, you know, we're still protecting identifying information of patients slash clients. It's just that it is nice to have someone. I mean, I'm, I also have a best friend from our graduating program as well. So I've got two of them to go to if I don't like his answer. Oh, okay. Yeah. So it's good to have a backup. It is. Um, you know what I read, interestingly. Um, oh, I started, first of all, I started going on TikTok, which it's, it's, it's a young person's world out there, but I'm giving it a try. I'm at Dr. Lindsay Callen Weissner. Um, so if you're listening, follow me there. If you want to see me stumble and fall a couple times. Um, no dancing allowed that right? No dancing. No, no. But, um, but it's funny. Uh, so I had recently, there was a study that came out that, um, exposure to true crime actually lowers your anxiety. Really? Yeah. What? Okay. Why is that? Uh, the other, the other way around, right? You would think it's the other way around, but it's not. And in fact, uh, this study was pretty interesting. It came out with a couple of different findings. Um, but they, they interviewed 200 German. Um, men and women and they asked. There were, uh, four things that they looked at. Or five, but what they found was that your, uh, a couple things, your level of anxiety predicts the amount of true crime you have, you consume, like watch or listen to. Um, and so the relationship is the higher your level of anxiety, the more likely you are to, to consume true crime the following day. So, like, if I'm anxious today, it's highly likely that I'm going to consume, um, true crime tomorrow, which is great. Can I? Would love to lie in bed all day tomorrow listening to true crime. Um, they also found that the, the amount of violence in the true crime actually determines how positive your mood will be the next day. But weirdly, it's the more positive your, uh, I'm sorry, the more crime you consume, the more positive your mood will be the next day. Uh, you'll be happier that that is so unusual. I mean, what I think you're like, well, well, it's not happened to me. At least I didn't get stabbed today. Is that so it, it could be, you know, the idea is, um, it's sort of like a crime scene, fire drill for your brain. Or like the worst things that could happen. Right. And it's sort of some of us feel like we're preparing for it. Um, true crime doesn't increase anxiety, anger, or sadness. Um, and weirdly, people who consume true crime before they go to sleep are less anxious the next day. Yeah, that is, that's really unusual, because I would think like somebody who was living maybe like in a bad situation, who was listening to like a true crime story that might be similar to them. You think that, oh, no, this is going to happen to me tomorrow. Right. You would think it would cause, um, an increase in anxiety, uh, increase in fear, um, maybe like jumping, you know, jumping, what could be lurking around each corner? Right. But no, it actually is a positive thing. And the, I think, and it's interesting, because I don't usually listen to or watch true crime before bed. It's just not in my routine. Um, largely because my husband doesn't like true crime. Uh, and so I, I, I don't often do that. But what they found, the study says that, um, what they think, rather, is that it's sort of like exposure therapy. Like we're, you know, where you, like if you're afraid of the dog and the dog, you can have the dog at one side of the room for you and then it gets a little closer. Okay. So that's exposure therapy. So they think that maybe the reason true crime sort of reduces anxiety is that we're, it's sort of preparing us for that fight or flight mode the next day. Oh, uh, it does make sense, right? Yeah. Um, and the other thing that, um, and I wrote a psychology today blog about this. So this is why I've got it fresh to my head. Um, one of the things that, um, that they also said in this article was, uh, about the exposure therapy, um, is that like in true crime becomes a familiar tale to us. And I thought of, if you think of the fairy tales, we tell children, before they go to bed, like, um, they're not very good. Like they're not very happy stories. Okay. You know, two, two kids got caught by a witch who tries to eat them in the woods. Hansel and Gradle. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Right. Sleepy or like Cinderella, you know, wicked stepmother, dad dies that, you know, they steal her boyfriend and none of these stories are really as it is. And yet we use them as sort of lessons. There's always a lesson in there. You know, don't be the evil step sister or don't be, um, so I think that might be related to the whole true crime and exposure therapy. therapy like this might be part of the reason why we use true crime to make us feel more comfortable with the world okay like that does make sense okay so go I think my selling points on that will be listen to the husband did it because you'll get more sleep that night and be less anxious the next day here we go I think that'll work like a charm right that work are you are you are you convinced because I think I think it could be kind of a convincing tagline oh so I mean what we we are talking about your podcast is it it's not going to just focus on Long Island like like I'm so crimes of Long Island is purely focused on Long Island okay um and we often get the question is there really that much crime in Long Island and in fact I asked this to my of Mark the first time we he approached me about doing a broadcast podcast together I was like is there that much crime in Long Island and he later told me that basically that question basically made him want his head want to spin off you know spin around in circles because he was shocked by it because there is a lot of crime in Long Island and it's a pretty it's kind of a big place you know it could be like a small state of its own um so we uh there's plenty of crime in Long Island but the husband did it is all over the place okay we've got a text a case about Texas coming up soon um the one that I was talking about the David Hendrix case that took place in Illinois um it's all over the place so if you know of a a true crime like if if or if your listeners know of a crime that happened nearby them where the husband did it or the boyfriend did it they can we love having our listeners call in and give us tips on cases to follow next because it's fun for the listener to see their idea come to fruition and uh and it's fun for us to save an ounce of brain power I guess that when you know you like you say you you look at this like a logical aspect of all these true crime cases has there ever been one that you just really kind of got glued to or did you think you could kind of step away from it so there is one case that I am obsessed with it happened it's it's actually a crossover we're gonna use it as a crossover episode for what the husband did it and the crimes of Long Island because um it's this woman her name was Mindy and she and her husband were going through a divorce there was a lot it was very contentious it was an extremely wealthy man um he was the his father was one of the founders of a major oil company uh and he was just a multi-millionaire in the 80s uh money so much money he didn't know what to do with it except he did know that he didn't want his student to be ex-wife to have that and unfortunately and mysteriously Mindy was murdered in her own home um in a house where very few people had the locks or keys and um they he was never charged he went on to live a pretty long life and she died at the age of belief 31 yeah it might have been 34 but I mean she was young and beautiful yeah and that's one that I can't shake and so um I had actually started investigating it on my own actually this was a COVID case that I was like following during COVID that I was obsessed with okay and um we finally recorded it about five weeks ago and I almost cried after we're recording it because it felt so good to finally speak this out into the open and um you know camper enclosure to her family but it's certainly uh I don't know if there was something really moving about that case man yeah I you had a failure at some point there's there's something that's going to touch you because you know it is human lives and yeah they're they're taken away senselessly not you know well they were 112 and they passed away and they're smart you know it's just you know cut down in their prime really it's people cut down in their prime it's sad when there are children involved and they're often are um one discussion we've had a couple times is whether or not um when a man kills their um wife and children sometimes they're referred to as um a family annihilator it's like someone who you know kills the whole family but there's certain criteria of that so we've had a couple of healthy debates about whether what qualifies as a family annihilator case and what doesn't um usually the family annihilator also has some sort of history of um narcissism and sort of juvenile um prime uh over activity there and so we dabble a little bit into the typologies of uh you know like anti social etc um and god it's fascinating I love what I'm doing I love what I'm doing I'm just excited to share it because we've recorded so many episodes in there you know we're slowly releasing them over time and uh yeah and having obviously you know living on Long Island and done uh crimes on Long Island you know everybody probably asks you about Rex you or Ben yeah I don't think he's the Long Island serial killer really yeah wow um I think he is a killer okay I think he did kidnap um and have plans to kill uh Nikki um but I don't I don't think he is the Long Island serial killer it's an unpopular opinion but okay you do you think that that they're still out there or you think yeah I think they're still out there um I think that they're still out there I mean I guess there's a chance they might have you know died of natural causes um because I you know you think about average age but I think this was uh a police officer or someone who knew more about how the police force worked right and therefore was sort of able to um navigate this right yeah they'd be able to hide into the radar or everything yeah yeah it's a super unpopular opinion but I'm glad you asked because I like being part of him popular opinions yeah it's interesting because you know you hear what the news feeds you sometimes and yeah there's you know you probably look at it at you know giving your profession you look at it from a different angle too sure sure yeah I mean I think he was and he was definitely a murderer he was definitely a horrible person um I just can't I'm just not sure I can see all of these murders and all of this time um and there doesn't it's not like there's a clear tie um do this right uh it was it's been long I mean before we had Rex Hurrim and we it was sort of long suspected that maybe there was more than one person killing people in Gilgo Beach right you know and I'm not quite sure why that whole idea just you know at the fan or like left everyone's mind when we had someone who was really fucking creepy it helps but that was my first one um I did well I did pretty well um so really effing creepy and willing to take the blame for some of these cases and right I maybe like you said I think you hit the nail on the head that all of a sudden there was somebody to point to where they just didn't know yeah oh yeah and he they pointed to him and he nodded yes right you know it was crazy because we will never know or maybe we will I hope we one day do know for sure and if I'm wrong I hope there's something compelling some compelling evidence that really like I'm confronted with that's like wow you're right this was the guy um I think there can be more than okay I'm going to use my second one here there can be more than one asshole in a town you know that's right you know I mean and coincidentally one of my guests the while back as a guy named Joseph Chevelli wrote a book whose father on his death bed said to him I was the Tylenol killer oh wow and he destroyed the father destroyed all the evidence so he was having a hard time you know like he became a forensic psychologist okay as he got older and um interestingly enough I interviewed a police sergeant from uh the Chicago PD and I was telling her his story and she's like I just started reading his book I was like he wants support from the police I'm like do you want to talk to him he says I have somebody who does cold cases he says he says I'm on it that's a man oh my god that's that gives me chills that's like that's how excited I would be about it you know yeah I mean I hope that he gets that closure you know because having because he lived with so much growing up you know he said he said he went to a lot of therapy to you know to deal with his feelings and stuff like that and yeah he saw there was like a he was a monster you know he said you know how to now yeah he's dealing with and like hopefully just get that answer I mean obviously it doesn't change anything in the past right what happened to these people but at least for him you know he knows that like i did the right thing i agree you know i think that i feel as passionately about brookrime as people feel about um the jfk's assassination and like getting to the in the um the film with the z and blink that's a brooder thank you um you know and like i hope there's one day there's an answer for all of us for our quest and i think i hope that as true crime podcasters what we're doing is sort of trying to uncover little more souls of brook like maybe can make connections that haven't been made before and maybe that's extremely egocentric it's definitely mainly egocentric actually but i think that we're all curious about understanding more about our history and how we got here yeah and sometimes when that one little fact is uncovered it could change the course of everything right you know yeah i don't think it's i'm going to uncover it but i would love to be around when it's uncovered you know you never know Lindsey I know i'm pretty stubborn that's true so um you know that we always like to tell people like what podcasters on our podcast playlist i was wondering if you uh oh sure hold on let me say you provided me for us actually i know right um what is on my playlist oh well true crime obsessed it's a great it's a great podcast i would give you that host role is his name um what's his name um there's two of um bro is bro one of them no no okay um oh you know what else i've got i've got uh this show podcast pics oh oh that's you are you that clown yeah yeah that um dear Nina is a good one too um it's a woman talking about a very knowledgeable woman i believe she's a therapist talking about um friendships and how friendships mature um uh and then what else uh oh there's a podcast called um break in the case which is it's another true crime podcast i wish i could say like oh i've got cosmo on my hug no i don't listen no a fashion tips i don't know i don't do that it's mostly psychology and fear crime okay so uh of course you know we have shame the self promotion you you've done that twice before you and i love that go yes so uh if you would like to listen to one of our podcasts which you should you can uh have a listen to crimes of long island podcasts there's also the husband did it uh that's their found everywhere podcasts are found um i am also now on tiktok at dr. lindsey l-i-n-d-s-a-y calon k-a-l-l-e-n wisener w-e-i-s-n-e-r but you'll put that in your notes um and then you can find me on instagram at psych shrank mom there we go dr. lindsey calon wizer you know it's always a pleasure to have you here so thank you so much for playing by the show you know it's always a pleasure to be here i can't wait till the next time it looks like the sherpa is no longer locked in the bathroom at the sherpa shale so we can finally get back to the show thanks so much to dr. lindsey calon wizer and be sure to check out the husband did it because we know you guys love to crime podcasts as you know we do to crime episodes over here too when we do do crime screening when i believe we've got one coming up um about a week or two if i'm not mistaken so be sure to come back around there but check out lindsey's enter crimes of Long Island podcast also that will do it for me um next week we will be talking to more podcasters we'll be talking to christian and andy from the dangerously unprepared with christian and andy perfect name and another good conversation uh christian was online previously a few years back when he had the random christian show now he's got a brand new podcast and i got to meet him he got to meet his co-host andy and uh we had a lot of fun so i hope that you check that out so if you're not doing something on a Saturday check out my sherpa selects those are some of my favorite episodes over the past many many years that i've been doing this or if it's season eight i get that right still we we will be on season eight for a little while rebels and it'll probably be a good one i know we've got some inspiring episodes coming up so if you want to be inspired wake up Saturday put on the podcast and be inspired how many times do i make you that offer not very i say because most of the time i'm just being silly okay but that will do it for me and until then we will see you next week and i say to you liva lasher pollution thanks for listening to the sherpa's podcast picks the podcast is now over please disperse and tell everyone about us as long as they don't put us back in jail viva lasher pollution