Trevor Wallace & The Dr. Dre Conversion

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Hi, I'm Bobby Lee, and I created a graphic novel with my friend Matthew here. It's called Deadweights. Look at how beautiful this is. Wow. Wow. Amazing. Dude, this looks great. Look at that. Oh my God, this. You can get it everywhere. Books are sold. Barnes and Noble, Amazon, and GunnerBooks.com. It's rated our Kung Fu Panda Meets Kickass. It's from my heart, and so please check it out. It's a good combination, they serve. We'll see. I want them to debate 10 a.m. Open mics, and if it's worth the time. Ramsey is going to win every debate, even if he's like, yeah, okay, fine. I was speech-in-debate champion in college. Yeah, I know I can just feel it, even if it's like about periods and stuff. I feel like you'd would. Yeah, you should debate or say why periods are bad when it should stop. I'm trying to navigate Bobby right now. 10 a.m. Can you start with piano? 10 a.m. I haven't started with a piano as of late, but maybe I will. Maybe I will. Protect your nose, Ramsey. Please cover your nose. Nice. [music] And beef. [music] What's going on with your nose? I was just covering it up. Why? I don't want it to be any inspiration for anything. If it was, I would start with, hold in the nose. I'm not talking about nostrils. Like, I try to win a competition. I talked to a doctor. They said it was normal. What is wrong with your nose? He's got 10,000 pores inside his on the nose, which is natural. According to my dermis. I've just never seen it. Natural amongst what? Sand people? She did not. That's not a very nice word. He's Muslim. Yeah, thank you very much. No, I was talking about Star Wars reference. Oh, yeah, yeah. So, because I know there were men wearing masks in the movie. And you're just like, "La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la." And I'm cat. That's that. Crazy. This is crazy. Normal holes in the nose. You know, women find you attractive. They do. Very. There was one girl. I told you who it was. That one. It's ramsy single. In my mind, I'm like, it was the first time where I went, "Oh, he could be attractive." He could be attractive. Because when I look at you, I don't see it. I can only see it through other people's eyes. Yeah. I mean, would you find him attractive? Yeah, I think so. Thanks, Kapper. But do you see like your openers on stage and you're like, "Oh, there's no way that they're hot." Yeah. Well, is that why I go? What? Is that why you take me? What? Because there's no way that you think I can get it into women. I don't know why I take you. I haven't really thought about why. Let's not get it. Let's not get too much in the scar. Although somebody on my DM said, "Can you bring Kapper to San Jose?" I don't know if I can use her because Santino uses her. Wait. But I don't have pores in my nose. Oh, no. I take a porous guy who's loyal. You have pores on your badge. How do you know that? Oh, that's kind of weird. What? I don't care for the disloyalty. I stay loyal. I'm loyal? Unless Santino's interested. You did a really good job at my special. Did I? I think you were running around and you really did. Because you see my assistant there? But I was there. You had your assistant there? At the after party. She was eating Taco Bell. But yeah, you really did work hard. Some would say, "Secure to spot in your tour." I think so. I think you're right. Some would say that. Some would also say, "I can do maybe five minutes at the top." You can host the show. Okay. You can host Santino's day. You can feature it. I can headline. Okay. Deal. You can headline. Have you done stand-ups? Is that your favorite character in Star Wars? Or Jawa? relate to them. They look like the Raiders of Oakland a little bit. Yeah, but Luke, Luke never calls them Tuscan Raiders. He does. Yeah. In the movie because it's sand people. Yeah. So there's Obi-Wan, I think. Mm-hmm. But you saw the movie, right? Oh, love that part. Yeah. So good. Yeah. So good. Classic Star Wars. So did you finish episode one of Game of Thrones? I got pretty close. You know, you know, since we last talked about you just started. Yeah. You never saw it. The original, not the new thing that's out the. Yeah, but it never saw the original. It just came out three. Oh my god. I've never seen it either. It was great. Whoa. Whoa. Guy and he cut off the guy's head and did all that stuff. Hey, man. Hey, man. Well, yeah. For cat who hasn't seen it. Yeah. Is there a lot of it? Why haven't you seen it? Let's get down to this. Yeah. Let's get down to it. Because I think I tried to see it in the beginning and I was like, okay. Okay, what? I know what this is about. I know the political. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I think it's my ex-boyfriend at the time was like, you got to see it. And I just didn't like that. I just didn't want to see anything that he was seeing. You know what? I think I have the same reason. Yeah. Not the boyfriend, but the girlfriend thing. Yeah. That's why I don't really watch like basketball anymore. I like, I stopped watching football with Tim Tebow when he was on. Oh, or whatever you say. Okay. Because that was it for me. Can we go to stick with Game of Thrones? Yeah. Tim Tebow, you know, you dated him? No, no, no, no, he wouldn't, he wouldn't want to. No, I didn't date Tim Tebow. No, no. Because it wasn't he a virgin for a long time? Yeah. I think he was like a famous Christian. Yeah. We go back to, um, sure. Oh, why wouldn't you? So those, that's the only reason why you haven't seen it. Yeah. You're not a TV guy. No. Girl, I mean, thanks. Yeah. So are you gonna finish episode one or no? I'm thinking about, I'm thinking about it. I don't know if it will. I don't think you're a TV guy. No. You didn't like it at all. That's fine. Hey, kids, I think you said you're gonna watch it until the, uh, I'm gonna watch the red bedding. At that, I'll give you my word. But you, you have to watch them finish one first. But that's the thing about it. I don't like. Wow. Oh. Oh, God. He's fine. God. A sidewalk here. A star. A sidewalk. Yeah. Yeah. Do you say like, has it in the Super Bowl? No, that's your profile you look at. - Talk to me. - Thank you. (laughing) - That's why I call you silent. - From the side, you kinda look like a Horebo gummy bear. - Here we go. - You know what? - And I'm not saying Horebo because it is a, (laughing) it's the best brand. - It's the best brand. - Horebo gummy bears are the best. - I love it. - Yeah, yeah. - But you know how confident you've gone, I think a year ago you would have never slept me back. Because I've done this show and I know that you like zingers. You zips abs off on this show. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - I can't, yes, ain't. You gotta come in with heat, yeah. - Yeah, yeah, I am gonna know straight, yeah. - Would you be talking shit about your guys knows this? - It's not my mind. - Can I see your side profile? - It's not the profile he has an issue with. It's the porous level. - What does that mean? - What? - Mostly at his nose and look at all the porous in his nose. - Trevor, you don't have to do it. - Oh, yeah, that's a Braille man's. (laughing) - You got Schindler's list written on your nose, dude. - I was writing that, it's a line. - That's these scrolls that you can read in front of those. - Yeah, yeah, wow. - I would have never noticed that unless Bob brought it up. - Yeah, yeah, but now that you do notice it, right? - Can you unsee it now? - Please don't. That's not. - Yeah, I can unsee it. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - Yeah, Rims is a great guy, so I'm not gonna lie. - He's a great comic, great guy. - Great guy. - Yeah, do you know Katmuch or no? - A scene at the store but never met officially. - Nice to meet you. - Kat, Trevor. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Great nose, but yeah. - Great, thank you so much. - Can I see the side profile? - Yeah. - Oh! - Is it German? - French. - Yeah. - Okay, yeah. - Yeah, I'm a type of French person. - Kind of like-- - That smells of the pits. - Smelly, yeah, hairy armpits. - Okay, yeah. - Sluts. - Okay. - Roode. - It's not not true. - Our French sluts. - It's Manajitois. - You're very-- - What does that mean? - You know, they're very sexual people. - They're open. - They're open and sexually. - Yeah. - And I feel like I could get laid there. - Oh, big time. - Yeah. - You think? - Maybe what? - I think Irvine. (laughing) - You think Irvine got laid up and Irvine. - Oh, wait, let me tell you. - What parts of the country do you think I do well in then? - Irvine. - Irvine, yeah, Irvine, yeah, yeah. - K-town. - K-town, obviously. - San Francisco. - San Francisco. - San Francisco, good. - Korea. - No, in this country. - North or South. - North. - Hawaii. - Detroit. - Destroy. - Hawaii. - Destroy. - Hawaii, where else? - I think that's it. - Yeah. - Five places. - Okay, I'll tell you. - I think anywhere. I think I really think anywhere. - I don't think ever anywhere. - How about Jose? - Like Lubbock. - I don't do so well. - Yeah, I don't do so well. - Really? - But who does well out there? - Yeah, yeah. - Do you want to do well out there? - Jacksonville, Florida. - You don't want to do well out there? - Where? I did do one there. - No. - Do one? - Yeah, I did one there, and she was. - What? - I feel like the woman in Jacksonville who wants to fuck you is going to be really hot. - That's a good compliment. - The one there is going to be really hot. - Oh, the one. - Yes. - The one is a test. - She's a Jacksonville. - Oh, the one there. - Only one. - Well, if there is one, she's a. - There is one. - There is one. - Yeah, yeah. - And you did? - Can we pull her up? - I did, I did. - The one. - Yeah, I did one. - Well, what do you have? Let's pull her up. - I get to get my phone back and show you. - Oh, really? - You don't record with your phone in here? - What? You don't record with your phone in here? - I forgot it upstairs, guys. - Like a 5G thing? - Yeah. - Usually, do you have my phone down here? - I just don't have it right now. - Here's what girls and Jacksonville look like. - Wow. - One of those guys. - The one's like a history book. - Yeah. - And also, that's not accurate. There's not one gold grill. There's not one white girl saying the word white, but you can't say on that. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - I don't see an invincible tattoo anywhere. - Yeah. - Yeah. - I don't explain that joke. - Wow. - Like, kind of a white track. - He didn't hit with me. - He kind of tattooed the person, you know? - Invisible. - Invisible. - With Mark Wahlberg? - Yeah. - Let's just move past the joke. - No, no, I want to analyze it. - It was an attempt. - Yeah, yeah. - That's what I'd be awful. - Invisible tattoo. - Yeah. - Okay. - Yeah. - Can we couple something else, maybe? That's, yeah. - I don't see it. - How about backdoor babe? - I like that. - Two of those pretty good. - Maybe. - No fat. - Tap out logo. Whoa. - Tap. - Oh, me on the nose? - I'm spigging it up on the nose. Jacksonville, you can find it right there. It's above. - It's a date count. - Orlando. - Orlando Jacksonville. Orlando's it. - Yeah. - That was a tip for tap. We're even right now. - We are even. - We are even. - Yeah, very good. Good call back. - Hey, thanks Matt. - I appreciate that. - Thank you. Why isn't Steve on the show more often? - Steve who? - Your brother. - He's been on a New Year's. - Manly 20. - He's probably number one Lee, I'd say. - Ooh. - A lot of the Lee clan. - Ooh. - Out of the Lee's. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know what I would say? He's number one as well. - That's nice. - You know, I was really trying to rally you up. And I got nothing. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - Yeah, I just feel like people in the comments are like, "Where's Bobby's bro?" - Yeah, yeah, I agree. Yeah. You're not gonna rally up today. - Good. - You know why? I texted Santino and I said, "What can I do to piss off Bobby before they're in the show?" - Yeah. - And he literally said, "Bring up Steve." And the fact that he's not on the show. - Yeah. - I don't want to come on. - So shout it to Santino, but it didn't. I like this mood you're in today. - It's a pretty good mood because I'm on Alexa Pro now. - Nice. - Yeah, yeah. So I think it's. - Wow. - What since when? - A couple weeks. - Okay. - Congratulations. - Congratulations. - How do you feel? - Ruminating thoughts are not as intense. - Nice. - Because I go into these loops. You know, and I start thinking about something. And I just get super depressed because I'll just think of negative things. Constantly. Even after the special, that week was terrible. - Why is that? - Because I think it was like, I worked on it for so long. It was done. And it's so much anxiety over the year just giving, you know, getting ready for it. And then once it happened, it went fine. But I just went into depression. I think mainly because I have to write another hour. - Yeah, yeah, it's hard. - Not for a while though. You have like a year. - Yeah. - Put it on five years, I think. - Yeah. - You can still run the same house. - I think, you know, I'll probably do another one three years. - Really? - Yeah. - I like that. - That's not that long, three years. - I think in three years, I'll have one. I'll tour it and then do another one. How many have you done? - One. - Yeah. - Shooting another one March 1340. - For who? - For me. Oh, I don't know. - Was it teradactyl? - Well, you had teradactyls the first one, yeah. - What was the first one? - Prime. Amazon Prime. You sold it there. - Yes, Prime. I don't have a buyer yet, but we're just going to shoot into what happens. I don't even care if it goes on YouTube. I feel like that's almost like second. That's like, might be best case scenarios. I already have the audience there. - Oh, right. - And you can just drive somebody clips to it on there. - Oh. - I don't really know. - Yeah. - I'm honestly surprised you got a 4.3 out of 5. I'll take that all day. That's not bad. - I'm scaled. - What is up? - Yeah, 4.3 out of 5. - But that's at 8.6. - Oh, okay. - That's 86%. - That's not bad. - That's good. That's great. Did you choose the background? - Yeah, I chose everything. - Wow. - You did a great job with it. - Yeah. - It's dope. - It is. How did you, your set design, you showed me at the store, really sick. - It was so cool. - You guys were both at the taping? - Yeah. - Yeah. - How'd it go? - It was awesome. - He killed it. - It was awesome. - You killed it. - Did you show your cock and balls? - No. - But hold a little bit. - What? - Anything. - What? - I didn't do anything. - Is that crazy? - There was a little pub shot at the end. Last one. - That's where the credits are. - I see. - I did one pub shot at the final shot. - That's gotta be the hook. - Yeah, yeah. - That should be the thumbnail. - I genuinely believe that's true. - Yeah. - No, because for many years people were like, you know what? - Oh, you could make a, you know, you do all these weird things. And I wanted to show that I don't have to do those things. I just do it for funsies. - I think that's beautiful. - Yeah. - But let them see a little cock and ball. Especially now it's on Disney Channel. - Yeah. (laughing) - With Hulu, they're like, we have one note. No penis. (laughing) - Yeah, yeah. They had no notes too, which is weird. - Really? - Really, nothing. - It's already done or they were there. - No, but they were all there. And I asked, you know, is there any notes? And they don't have any. (laughing) - Yeah, the word, which makes me feel like they're gonna go, "Oh, we're not airing them." (laughing) - No, no. - Like whatever, whatever. - We fucked up, give you a deal. But yeah, yeah, we're not airing them. - What's the name? Have you said the name yet? - Yeah, I mean. - I think you said it here. - I mean, I might change it. - What's the working title though? - Finally. - Finally. - Yeah, that's great. - Oh, finally. - Oh. - Is that all the LE? (laughing) - Is it LE? - No. - Oh. - It should be right? - I think that's good SEO, good search engine. - I know, Lee. - I know, Lee. - You should do finally. - Finally. - I'm gonna know on that one. (singing) - Fellas, you already know what time it is. What time is it, Blue? I mean you? - It's time. - It's time the chew. - Yeah, it's time to level up too. And Blue chew just dropped something crazy. I'm talking next level championship bell, gold-plated energy dude. - Okay. - Blue chew gold is the newest innovation from the number one chewable ED brand. - Whoa. - I'm telling you right now guys, I use this stuff. - It's the best. - And I, you don't need to use it. - Yeah, but sometimes you want it. - Sometimes you want it. Sometimes you want it. - Give me a high five. Sometimes you have to. - I want to. - But the reception has been 100% like Rotten Tomatoes. - Oh wow. - Yeah, it's been great. - Yeah. - And this ain't your grandpa's a little blue pill. This is a four-in-one beast that's setting the gold standard for performance. - Down. - We're talking two ingredients for blood flow to keep that rocket pumping mixed with morphine and oxytocin. - Oxytocin. - Oxytocin. - That's the love hormone. - Exactly. To turn up the arousal and connection in your brain and body. - Blue chew gold dissolves under your body. tongue and works in as little as 15 minutes. That means you get you can get it on quicker and stay in the game longer. Elevation without hesitation. Make life easier by getting harder and discover your options at Blutu.com. We've got a special deal for our listeners. Get 10% off your first month of Blutu Gold with Code Belly. That's from a Code Belly. Visit Blutu.com for more details and important safety information. We thank Blutu for sponsoring the podcast. The game is almost here baby and no better way to cash in during America's biggest sporting event than price picks. Where it always feels good to be right. And since the big game is right around the corner that also means it's your last chance to get into the football action before the next season. So close out the season right with price picks by getting $50 instantly in lineups when you play your first $5. Wow. Are you copying Bobby's lineup, Ramsey? I got a couple guys I follow but Bobby's one of them. Well, my lineup has the jets in it and I don't think they're in the Super Bowl. So I don't think you should. But anyway, find your community on price picks right? You community, right Ramsey? It's very important. With the new social feeds feature, you can share price picks with your friends and copy lineups for winners with a single click. New lineups you like or use them as inspiration for your own picks. You can even follow price picks partners like us and tail or fade our picks with just one click. All right. So a big game is coming up. Do we like Drake May for more or less than 220 point. What about Drake? I go less. I go more dude. It's a big game. Oh, I'm going more for Bobby. Okay. Let's go more or less than 1.5 passing touchdowns. I go more. I go less. Come on. Okay. Finalize the lineup. It's that simple. Yeah. Download the price. Do one more. Okay. Do we like Kenneth Walker for more or less than 0.5 rush or reception touchdowns? Oh, I think I think it's going to be more because that's a lot. That's a very that's a very few yards. Yeah. I think he's going to have a bad day. He has an ankle vibrations. Are you? He has ankle vibrations and I don't think that's good for the Super Bowl. Ankle vibrations. Yeah. Finalizing it right now. That easy. Download the price picks app today and use our code Belly to get $50 in line. That's after you play your first $5 lineup. That's code Belly to get $50 in line that's after you play your first $5 line price picks. It's good to be right. It's a tough one. Did you ever have company merch coming up? That was like the pun or like corky. Like like it's like you flip the shirt up and there's a punch line. I think that was popular early on with road dogs. Did you ever have that? No, no. I never I never did. Wow. Never sold merch on my life and my life. Not even a pub. But you know, oh, that's a good one single Bobby Lee pub. Yeah. I would go for a lot of money. Yeah. You know, D&A. Yeah. I'm scared of that. Me too. Because I do glue thums. What? Yeah. What is this? Glue thums. What is this? See that wall? Yeah. So the glue. Yeah. Well, I'm obsessed with glue. Oh, I think I know you should make glue thums. So you put glue in then you peel it off. Yeah. But you have to do like 20 layers in order for it to get into. Yeah. So it's been. God. He found Lexipro. Hold it. Yeah. You're the glue. You let right and draw on it. And I used to thought I thought to myself, should I sell this as merch? But I don't want to murder to happen to have to put my thumb prints all over the house. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, so it's like you still do it or no? He was. I made a complete glue hand. Maybe a month ago on the road. Maybe Pittsburgh. What inspired you to get into glue? Depression. No. I'd get it. It's got to be a middle school. What is that? That's you putting glue while driving. Oh, really? Then you just do that. Oh, yeah. I used to put glue and then it's like somebody's filming their Uber driver. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And he's got a door dash order too. How long ago was this? This is our 11th vlog. So this means it was probably nine years ago. Wow. Is it like a texture thing for you? Yeah. Oh, wow. Yeah. You know what I also used to do? I used to take by brand new. This is back in that time. Brand new converses. And I should time the back of my car. Like you just got married. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And I would drive it from Phoenix to LA, dragging on the freeway. So they get weathered. Oh, and then you wear them. And then I would wear them. Yeah. Wow. I did that shit in middle school. I wanted to be a skateboarder so bad. And they all had the, did you guys take it? Yeah. They all had like the tear right here from doing kickflips and kickflips. So when that I just grind it on the skateboard. Yeah. And then like one day they're brand new and next they are just torn up. And they're like, Oh, you must have skated hard. That's pretty crazy on that grip tape. But yeah, I was such a poser man. I just wanted to fit in. Yeah. I just have done a lot of posey stuff. Well, it's like also bite. So, you know, I wear Japanese Rottenham. I don't know if I cut it. No, but I'm going to say what I'm going to say. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And Christine. No, you know, really like no. Yeah. We call them freedom genes now. Yeah. I liked it, George. I like it. Bob is ready to go in. Explain it. Explain it. It's like freedom fries, but for jeans. Yeah, but explain why it's funny. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. So, but you like the shoes now, but what I would do is I would I go to APC. What is that? It's a close. And they have raw denim. They rent them out. So they'll get brand new raw denim. Have people wear them for years. And then they buy them back and they be selling a surrogate. Yeah, it's a surrogate. Yeah. And I buy them and they're more expensive. After they've been worn. Yes. How does that work? They're more expensive. Yeah, because they're perfectly distressed. Oh, yeah. Yeah. So who will have you look up APC pre-war and sold at the store? That's like that experiment in middle school when they like you have to watch this egg for like a week. Oh, yeah, return it. Like somebody has to take care of these jeans to the perfect level, then return it. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I don't. Explain the egg. Explain the egg. So I never went to biologist biologist chicken, but they'd make you I don't think they did they ever do this with placebo. I know. You make it kind of see something. I know what an egg looks like because it's up doing this. Okay. Okay. I know what an egg looks like. Okay. Yeah. Thank you. So we're loose. But I feel like maybe it was just a placebo effect or like I never really happened, but I think in middle school, you'd have to watch an egg for a week to show that you'd be a good parent, which is not a good. Is this real? We had to drop an egg off of like the third balcony to see if it would crack. Like we'd have to wrap it up and then it would work. Would you look what worked for the Ford Motor Company? No, it's just you know, they used to that with skulls and stuff to test like seep out some stuff. Like I do. Anyway. That's what we did. Yeah. That was it. That was a bad one too. It's what? No, because it's just. Yeah. Damn. God damn. Damn. That we're all failing on. Yeah, we'll explain our shit. Yeah, I don't want to explain. You're right. I dropped the ball of that one. It wasn't a reference. I was thinking about the egg. You said it. I was thinking it. Yeah, you were. Yeah, but you didn't say you know why? It wasn't that funny. But she threw it out there. Explain it. Explain it. You said with the girl in Jacksonville. Explain it. Yeah. Yeah. Can I tell you something that happened the other day at the comedy store? Please. I want to see what the correct reaction would be. Good, good, good. And I want to see if this person was out of pocket because I don't think they were, you know what I mean, but I didn't know how to react. So it was at the comedy store and like you don't know Kaperne, right? I mean, you've seen her around, but you didn't really never talk to her. There's several people like that at the comedy store where I know. I'm nice to them. I just never, I don't know their real names necessarily and you have fake names for. No, he does have fake names. Yeah, I do. Yeah, sometimes. Yeah, if I give, well, give me some of the fake names. There was no neck. No neck. Who's no neck? Yeah. I'll tell you after. I'll tell you. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Because he doesn't know that he's called no neck. He doesn't know. He's called. Yeah. Yeah. Minion neck. There's minion. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Are there the same people? This would be a fun game. See if I can guess who. No neck and maybe they're not the same people. Yeah, what else? I was told swap it. Yeah, come your nose. Yeah. Joey is Muppet. Muppet. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So if I don't know somebody's name, I'll just throw out a nickname. I'll just call them that. Like Rick Ingram, for the years I don't know his name. So I used to call him white lightning. That's great. Honestly, even better than Rick Ingram. Yeah. I think it down good to go to your actual man. Yeah. Yeah. Let the comedy show they're there. There was an outdoor man that walked out to me. I don't know his name. I've seen him around. Just don't know anything about him. He was, hey, could I talk to you by? And I go, sure. I thought he was going to, you know, when a young comic wants to talk to you, what do you think it's about? Comedy. It's about comedy or can I open for you? Can I open for you? Or like I need some advice. Yeah. And he goes, hey, if this guy goes, hey, if you know what I know about Jesus Christ we should get together and we could should talk. Like it excuse me? Yeah, but like this was out of the store. Yeah, this gives like flapper's energy. Yeah Hi, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, and that's he Zeus at the hall. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, that's right and I go excuse me and he goes yeah, but you know because I heard you want a podcast talking to a Christian and And he's like, "If you want to ever get together and talk about it, you know, I'd love to do that." And I go, "Thanks, dude. See you later!" Yeah. And we kind of walked away from each other. Is he new there? No. Oh, no. You guys super nice. By the way, Ernest, he's being very earnest. He's being earnest. He's not joking at all. He's not joking. Deeply Christian young man. Yeah. Can we say the name and bleep it? No. I don't even think you know. But there's no way you know. Can I ask you a question, were you coming from like a set? Were you in a good headspace when you. Oh, yeah. I killed. Okay, okay. That's the worst time I'm talking about Christ. I accept it. Talk to me after I bomb. Yeah. Patrick was wrong. It's like being coked down there. Do you want to sew, we're up here. I want to keep this train going. Oh, yeah. Fuck, yeah, yeah. So I'm in a good mood, killed. Yeah. You know, so like, you know, I'm on a new medication. I feel, I feel, you know, not ruminating, right? Sure the best way. And when he brought it up, I got trapped in my mind. Mm-hmm. You know what I mean? And there was so many different things that were going on. And did you try to get him fired? [laughter] I think the thought crossed your mind. It did. It did. I need to, yeah, yeah. Can you see a photo of this? Because I'll tell you why. I'm going to tell you why. Okay. Because the younger generation now, they don't know rules. Too confident, you feel it? Way too confident. And it's like, when I was a doorman, I'm just showing them a photo. So we can really, I'm so nervous. Have you seen number four? I think so. Probably around as well. Yeah. Because he's a student. Like, if I would have said hi to like Martin Lawrence in the '90s where Chris Rock, I would have got fired. Is that really how it was? No, but it was like, I don't think that it would, I think it would have completely ignored me. Yeah. Like, hey, you know what I mean? Yeah. Joe Rogan? Did he have to park your car? Do you think he's put like a rosary everywhere? [laughter] Or the demons? Yeah. Yeah. Then also, do I, am I evil? That's another thing that you go. Because he doesn't do that. He would never do that with Sebastian. He might though. There's no way. You don't think so. Sebastian get married in the largest Catholic church. Yeah, he's done. Yeah. You're approachable to somebody who wants to convert you. Yeah. To a religion. You have a vulnerability. You look convertible. Yeah. Oh, I'm not convertible. I didn't think I'm open though. Okay. Yeah. I think five minutes. Convertible. With my uncle, you think about Islam. Five minutes. Five minutes. All right. I think 10, but five. Okay. 10 minutes, amen. 10 minutes maybe. Yeah, yeah. You didn't say anything you just left. Thank you. I didn't know what to say. That was nice. That was nice. You weren't mean. I was in shock. No, I go, thanks. I didn't know it was a guy. Thank you so much. Guy. Yeah, man. And I walked away. And he was the first guy called. Do you avoid him now? Or have you seen him? Have you ever seen him since? Will you be avoiding him? Yeah. How have you come up with this? I want to know how you're going to follow up with this. Because this is pretty. This is. I think he'll be nice. I think he'll pretend like nothing happened. Well, I know his name now. Yeah. So now we'll go. Okay, please. Oh, fuck, please. We said this whole time. If you didn't know his name. What would you call him? What nickname would you give him? Yeah, that's what I wanted to know in the beginning. What was his nickname before? I see. That's another thing. I think it's probably-- He wasn't even in the realm of nickname. Wow. You know, I mean, he was NPC for sure. You're not saying that. It's like saying a non-playable Christian. Say hello to the world. Oh, shit. Yeah, he was at a non-playable Christian. That's tough. But funny. He's a funny guy. Very funny. I looked him up online. Yeah. And he's got potential. Yeah. Yeah. But there is a part of me that was founded offensive. I don't think it's okay. He never even said hello. Yeah. As a first conversation, it's a little interesting. To open with that. To me was-- God, God, God, people. And listen, I love God and Jesus and all that. But they'll stand up for an acrypto.com with a megaphone. They're not asking for like, hey, what's your name? Where you from? I heard about our Lord and Savior. They're just in it. They don't have any like social regulation. They're just like, here, let's talk about Jesus. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know. Kat and Ramsey. Has he approached you to try to convert you guys? No. He knows I'm steadfast in Islam. I would never. But he's never come up to you. He's never come. No. Which is actually really offensive. Yeah. He doesn't want to save your soul. What the heck? Yeah. I'm going to give you an example of why it's weird. Okay. So many, many years ago when I was living in San Diego, I had met the shores. Okay. And I was also heavily in AA, right? And Mitsu said something. I forgot what she said, but it really hurt my feelings. And I went to my sponsor, my A sponsor. And I go, no, granted, I'm a dormant in La Jolla. At that time, I had probably had a one conversation with her. I had just gotten past. She was super intimidating. And I was just relaying this to my, like I hurt my feelings to my sponsor. I was like, you know what you need to do then? Because this is what we do for as an active member of Al-Qaeda. And I'm just sit down with her and say that you have a resentment, you know what I mean? And that it really hurt your feelings, you know what I mean? And I looked at it on my go, the same rules don't apply to show business. You can do that at home depot or any other place, you know what I mean? But that does not apply to go to Mitsu shore and to do that. There's just no way. So I never did that. I think the same rule applies to this situation. He shouldn't come up to you. I don't think so. You're Mitsu in this situation. Hold. Hold. Hold. Hold. Yeah. He's ing this together. Nope. I think the rules have changed and maybe it's different now. But I'm just saying at that time, would you say that you're also more accessible than most colleagues? That's what I want to say. You're so friendly with everyone. Bobby's very nice to the girl. He's a little friendly as a word. Yeah. Right. You are more, you smoke more cigarettes than most. Thus you're on the patio. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You're most available. I'm available. Yeah. Yeah. Not the friendly. Because I've known about you for my whole career. But I feel like I would see you. And I didn't approach you until I heard you say something nice about me on this podcast of bad friends. But up until then, I just had not moved on. Yeah. As like a sign of respect. But that's, that's, that's how I'm like with other people. Like I didn't talk to spade until he talked to me. Yeah. And you had to put a wig on and wear a bra. Yeah. You downfired? I downfired it. Yeah. You're quick today. Very good. You don't have to explain that. I got it. You don't want it. Downfired. Don't explain. Is there anybody you would take the advice from? Like if Santino said like, hey, seek God, would you? Or you think it's a bit? Right. In my mind, as a cool out, who could do it? I think God knows that the only way that I could convert it, is if it was like decapriol. Mm. That's hilarious. If he used decapriol. He might be a different church. Yeah. That's what the sign ends with telling you. Yeah. But you know what I mean? It's got to be like a Barack Obama. Yeah. League of Obama came up to me. Hey, you know what I mean? It's like two thousand and tens. Celebrities kind of thing. No, you just need the credits. You need a good, I am. No, it's not credits. It's got to be something that's like, um. Simon Cowell. Merge Jackson. Let's go through the list. It's the lowest celebrity that could get you. It's now what I'm interested in. Quentin Tarantino. Quentin Tarantino. Maybe I'm shallow. Yeah. Do you think I'm shallow? I think that's what. No, but it feels like an attack. It feels personable. Because it's not even about the religion point. And so he looked at me and saw that I needed help in some regard. So now it's about you versus the religion in my perspective. No, the reason why he did it, it wasn't because that he set mentioned. Well, I heard you on George Janko's podcast. And George Janko's podcast. What? Isn't that a god party? Yeah. So that's why he got. I heard you're on that. So if you ever want to talk about Jesus, you're going to be, let's get together is kind of a thing. This all feels very friendly. No, it started. The more you keep explaining. It was like very genuine that he's just like. No, you guys are understanding. So I'm giving more details. Keep working. I know what I'm saying is. What I'm saying is if I'm working in an Apple store. There we go. Right. Right. If I'm working at Apple store. I like this. And when Steve Jobs was alive, he just happened to like, be visiting the store. Where you Steve Jobs in the situation. You've been missing short Steve Jobs. Steve Jobs. Are you going to explain me the situation? It's going to be an example, right? But I don't think an employee would walk up to Steve Jobs and go, hey, you know what I mean? You want to talk about Jesus. Yeah. For sure they wouldn't. Yeah. Yeah. So what you might walk up to Bobby Lee though. Maybe their manager. All right. So what you're saying is that I have no power. I'd say he's an employee. He's an employee and you're at the genius bar. It's not, you know, that's the. Oh, you're a shift leader. Yeah. But like Palo Alto. Palo Alto. Like where it all started. Palo Alto. Palo Alto, Bobby. Oh, headquartered. That's what you'd be like. I'm Martin Luther King, Jr. All right. All right. All right. So. In that situation. I'm Jesus. I'm working. Okay. I'm pinned to the cross and you're going to come up to me. Talk to me about myself. Okay. Okay. right. Maybe you're right. You were going to say something George. No. Yeah. You were at your hand up a long time ago. Okay. I do think it is weird that he approached you if that's the first thing you ever said to you. But I do think he was trying to help because he heard you on a podcast. He's trying to help. What to do? What to do? What did you say on George Janko's podcast? Maybe spark. I would have fine. He's just someone help me. Some younger voice from the comedy team. Please seek out to me. Yeah. But I also thought this is that if I do die, right? I mean, like judgment, right? And they go, you're going to hell. I go, why? Well, we sent people down. Right. And my, oh, that was my way. Because he would be the guy. He's a pure soul. This guy. I think God would do. I, yeah, there's no way. I think God's coming down as Leonardo DiCaprio. Yeah. I would. If you really want to say, it's a Bobby. It's not through a comedian. You got to send like some riot chick. Big rack is like, have you heard about the Lord? And you're like, go on. Yeah, baby, baby, baby. God would have sent somebody down to you through the form. I think that God would send a messenger that I would listen to. Yeah, he did. He did. Exactly this person. He's like, I tried and Jacksonville can work. Yeah, yeah. Didn't he get a lady who went to church? Oh, my God. I did. I did a worship leader. I did a horse. No, it was a horse. A horse. A horse. A horse girl. Yeah, yeah. It's weird that we're just saying people can convert you based on their IMDb or like how popular. No, but what I'm saying is that if it was like, you know, Mike Tyson probably could confirm me. Oh, 100%. Yeah. Another 100%. Yeah, give me, give me some names. And I'll tell you who. We have to find the Lord. What? Trevor Wallace. I'm Jewish. Welcome aboard. We're not. I would be I would have a conversation with him now. You know, I mean, yeah, if he really tried to convert me Trevor, you would listen. I would listen. Right. So what I'm saying is give me some names. I'll tell you if I would or not where it stops. Okay. Uh, Jay Johnson. New girl. Jake. Yes. Oh, okay. Letterman. Nope. Josh Peck. There we go. Yeah, you know, see, this is, this is where I'm interested in the line. Where's the line where we go? Nah, I'm not listening to that guy. You love him, man. I do love it. Maybe I will. Okay. Yeah. Maybe I will. Lucy Rose. What? Gypsy Rose. Nope. There's no way. No. Craig Robinson. You have to. He's on the office. Yeah. I don't know if he likes me. Why do you say this? So it's only people that like you can't have credits. Yeah. Yeah. I can't imagine him doing it. I do have a dream person who you kind of hope speaks to you about this. Oh, cool. Yeah. I mean, if it was like Dr. Dre. Yes. Anyone from N. W. A. Anyone from N. W. A. Ice Cube. Yeah. Candace Owens. Yeah. Candace Owens for sure. How about Puff Daddy? No. Eric Kirk. No. No. Jay Z. You have to listen. He's got the fireworks and everything. You gotta listen. Dr. Dre. That's right. He has to do it. Easy. His ghost. Yeah. Oh. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It just depends. How about you? Who could convert me from Judaism to Christianity? What's funny is when my dad proposed my mom, he was Christian and when he proposed to William Armington, my mom before saying yes, said, will he convert to Judaism for me? And he said, yeah. But before saying yes to the ring. She asked that. Wow. But like, what a pressure moment. That's a lot. I've already got the right. You're signing the lease for dries. Hey, that is real love, though. For your girlfriend, would you? No. Absolutely not. Would you? What? Convert. Convert. As he don't love her. No, I'm just not going to. I'm not. That's what that's real love. What he did was real. As parents, real love. My girlfriend is Jewish as well. Okay. Converting to Judaism is so much work. It's not. It's a full government. It's a whole thing. It's easy. I'm in it. And I don't even know. You got a daughter. You got to go. I'm sure. It's a lot of water. Yeah. Trust me if anybody. This is what I would say. Do I have to study? Yeah, you listen. No, but they said no. Sign of the dotted line. I was there. I'm not studying. I'm not reading any of the books. Right. I'll do it just to do what? What would you do then? Just sign up kind of. No, I would just convert. What does it matter? I just don't know how it works. Honestly. I'm not going to do it. I'm not doing any work. Yeah. It's really. What do they read? The Quran? Yeah. Tora. Tora. Yours? I'm the cramp. Yeah. Your Quran. Your Torah, right? Yeah. Yeah. It's kind of where I read. I won't read any of them. Oh, now that. Yeah. Yeah. Now you're just being hurtful. Yeah. I mean, I would read like a note from that wall. Oh, my ankle hurts. Oh, yeah. Big time. That's a big problem. What do I do? I guess you could try to go to a doctor, but that might take forever and be so expensive. Then what? Then what would I do? I think you've got. You've got to go to Zahdok. Exactly. Because why wouldn't you do that? You do that with everything else, right? Of course. You're re-reviewed on what restaurant. You don't go blindly to a restaurant. You probably do. No, no, no. Yeah. If this is Halal, guys, you'll go. But yeah. But but most of us, you know, I mean, we read reviews. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And I do that with my health as well. You got to stop going to the Halal, guys, with your heart and your body. Okay. Zahdok is a free app and website that helps you find and book high quality in-network doctors. So you can find someone you love. We're talking about booking in-network appointments with more than 150,000 providers across all 50 states. Whether you're looking for a dermatology, dentistry, primary care, eye care, or one of the 200 plus specialties offered on Zahdok, you can easily search by specialty or symptom to build the care team that's right for you. I really did use this. You know, I had a skin problem. I sort of got to use this too. You really and you went to Zahdok. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And they found a great dermatologist for me. It really worked out. It was so easy to and I read the reviews. And now this guy's my guy for life. Oh, it's convenient. It's convenient. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You did you didn't want for your nose. Not my nose. Okay. Stop putting up those doctor appointments and go to zahdok.com/belly to find an easily booked doctor. You love today that zocdoc.com/belly. Thanks, Zahdok for sponsoring this message. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Well, I know the name, but I know there's a wall. I wouldn't know. I went to that wall. How were you doing there? Jerusalem, right? Yeah. You showed me the photo. Yeah. I went to the wall and I stuck a note in there. The great wall. I'm trying to. Yeah. What are you doing? Yeah. What are you doing? Is there so much wall to do it? So it's not a lot of a lot. What were you doing in Israel? Oh, it's a funny bone out there. What is going on here? Yeah. So I went, that's the wall and you have these photos pulled up so quickly. Yeah. I would. I did a little note that stuck in the wall. Do you remember what you wrote? It was about pussy. Oh my God. Yeah. Hey, God, you get me more pussy. I don't know. Oh, something like that. Yeah. It was about a girl. Like can you get Sabrina to like me or whatever? It was like something. The majority of those notes are there. Yeah. Oh, was it a. What was that? We read Bergen Bern. Do you do some for the IDF? Yeah. No. Yeah. What's the shirt that I'm wearing? Bob Dong. Bob and Doug McKenzie. McKenzie. Oh, yeah. From Bruce. Brucesters. What's up? We went out there to perform for the troops or no? Are you were just on birthright? Oh, that was. Oh, that was Jamie Chong. It was. Jamie Chong what? Wait, is that what? It was just a free trip from Israel. You see Epstein in the back? Well, what it was was they used to bring groups of celebrities out there. Free. And you get to, you know, the first class, five-star hotels, pretty all the meals paid for. They give you big tours of everything. But everything if the tweet positive things about Israel. And it was. Did you know that before going? Not really. So you're in Israel and then you're like, wait, what do I have to tweet? It was hard to tweet because I did the first tweet and it was bad. It was in German. What was the tweet? It was what? Oh, this is beautiful out here. Thank you for the, you know, like hummus and stuff. What? Yeah. Is that it? Baby is great. Nothing weird going on here. Yeah, yeah. I like that. You know, it seems happy. Yeah. And then the comments were, oh my god. It's a hornet's nest. You don't need to rattle. You said, yeah. It's a hornet. It's a hornet. Yeah, it's like about groundhogs day. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Bugs, it's on. He feel. Cause you don't get to buzz. You don't do politics in your act now. Yeah. You don't talk about politics in podcasting either, right? Mm-hmm. You would Michael's to do it. Yeah. Yeah. What a great guy. Great guy. Really moving tickets. He's very funny, man. He's so funny. That guy. So he really is his energies. Yeah. Electric. Yeah. It's, it's hard to get two guys at the same level of host in terms of talent. You guys meet a lot of porn stars, don't you? We stopped doing that a while ago. It's got weird when you're like at an airport and some drunk guys like, what does Bonnie Blue see like? Yes. Latex. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. We had Bonnie Blue too. Yeah. So we had Lily Phelps and Bonnie Blue on and Lily was super funny and like good riff. And then Bonnie was kind of just more like, like you'd make a joke and she'd be like, No, I like getting real by that. - Oh, yeah, I'm playful. - Where was that door man when she was there? (all laughing) I think after that we were like, okay, we hit the Mount Rush more of people who do porn. We just, we kind of stopped. We just thought it'd be fun just to be ourselves or just like have other comics and whatnot. - I mean, I support people that are in the adult entertainment industry, but would I, like when I have porn says would I date them? I don't think I would. - Why not? - Have you never, though, I would never have? - Is that just because you've-- - Really? (all laughing) - Yes. (all laughing) - Explain yourself. - Yeah, yeah. I haven't. - But you've never hooked up with one? No? - Yes. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - A Jacksonville for sure. - Yes, I have. - But more, only fans of people. - But where does the line blur? Because you are the only fans and they're doing the same shit just different website. They're showing butthole and everything. - Yeah, I know. - No, it's probably just lingerie. You got a one reddit thread. You're like, why is there a lot of hair? - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - But some only fans only show, they don't show sexual, but it gets there. - You think, once you do, I'm only gonna do news. You think eventually one does. - I literally think it's a gateway drug to porn. - Yeah. - Wow. - Once you start the LF, even all the comics that are doing LF TV, I'm like, they're showing cock soon. (all laughing) - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Like one dark joke turns into anal perfect. - Right, yeah, yeah. - Exactly. I just think it is slippery. It starts with like lingerie and then people get bored of lingerie, and they're like, fine, one nip. - Yeah. - I mean, if I could get views on only fans using my butthole, and it was, I was making body blue money or these kind of people's money. - They're making so much money. - Then I would probably do it. Me and Ramsay would do sexual things. - I would do it, 100%. - If we, okay, which hole? (all laughing) Sorry, I've known this guy for like a decade plus. - Oh my god, thank you. - Bring it. - Pat. - That was really quick. - Yeah, yeah. - Yeah. (all laughing) - I think we're out of this bit. - Yeah. - No, it's not. I was thinking about which hole in the nose. Probably the one that's like 90. 90, I mean, 2000 to the right. - Send me the coordinates. - Yeah, yeah. - Yeah. (all laughing) - I should've been coordinates. I thought it would've been fun. - Longitude. - Yeah, that would've been it. - That would've been it. - Yeah. - Yeah, yeah. - Yeah, yeah. But would you, like, so, how about this, us four, right? If we all made $250,000 a month, right? And we all four, and we had a quick comedy, and we just all four had to have sex with each other. Would you do it? - Cat's face almost died. - Yeah, yeah. - Wait, I'm just confused. I'm like, what the mission statement there was. So we just quit comedy and we just-- - How about you, you're not involved. - You're just directing. We get the quick comedy, you have to drug these things. - Full time. - But it's us three. I know that you would do it based on your face, but yeah, yeah. - I might go down even to 10K. I'll be reverse from the negotiation. - But that's because right now, you're not there yet. - What I'm saying, no, no, no, no, no. - What I'm saying. - What I find Christ in your life, I've got here. - What I'm saying is that you, in two or three years, you're gonna be making great money. - That's awesome. - Because you were once at his level. - No. - Yeah, I mean, I have no Ramsey for like-- - He's a talented guy. - No. - This is getting weird. - I don't know why. - I think for both of you, I think that your guys are a couple years away from making pretty good money in the business. - Okay. - I think you're going from really good to pretty good. - Yeah. - I think that's a good idea. - And like, two to three years, you'll be getting, you know, bare minimum. (laughing) - You'll work at it. - Yeah, but you'll be making the $10,000 a month. - So we have to have sex with each other now? - No, I'm saying both of you-- - No, I'm just, forget that. Okay. - Let's go over that, okay. - I'm not going to do more of a positive thing. - Okay, there we go. - That's Alexa Protot. - I'm like, it's-- (laughing) - Okay, all three of you are a ziggin today. (laughing) - Some failures, but I think we're all the fucker. - What do you think? - Doing great. - The batting average is a battery average. - Either strike out, you get a grand slam. - I just wrote out there. - Absolutely, yeah. - Volume shooter, as they say. - It's a volume shooter. - Volume shooter. - But when you hit, you hit. - Yeah. - You've got some good singers today. - Thanks, Bobby. (laughing) - No, I'm being genuine. I'm genuine. - Yeah, I love doing this show. - Yeah, but you two don't do worry, I think. What do you think? - Yeah, I agree, yeah, yeah. - Trevor and I-- (laughing) - I've never seen Canada go up, but I've heard great things. - You just had a don't tell a special drop? - Yes, I did, yeah. - Plug it. - Thank you. - I had a don't tell a special out. - All right, leave that out. (laughing) - But yeah, I haven't seen you go up, but I hear great things. - Thank you, it's really nice. - Yeah. - How long have you known Ramsey? - Through Open Mikes, unlike the West Side. - Old school days. - For like 20 years. - Were you guys friends in the Open Mikes? - Time, I don't know. - We were definitely not, I wouldn't say we're not, we were not friends, we weren't enemies, but I remember doing a hosting at Open Mikes, and I drew Trevor last in the West Side, and I literally just, the only person in the audience was me. So I just went and sat in the audience of the West Side and I went there to watch you do three rounds. - Wow. - There was one A.M. bucket pool. - Yes, dude. - Because the West Side, they pulled 25 names out first, so you're so excited. - Yeah, yeah. - And throughout the night, you realized that you could be that last spot. It's almost worse than if you didn't get pulled. - That was my first ever Open Mikes was being the last slot at the West Side comedy ever. - Well, why do you stay? - Because you don't know, so you pulled 25 names. - Yeah, but by the second to the last guy, you know. (laughing) - Well, you would leave, right? - Yeah, I would leave. - Oh, you've waited so long. - Yeah, exactly. - I left when the other night where I saw Sebastian go up, and then Ali was, but then I saw that Sebastian had a 30 minute spot, and I just went home. I think I would leave in that situation, the West Side situation. - I had to stay. - Well, they don't tell you when you're going to be out of the 25. So like 50 people signed up, then they pulled 25 up top, so there's hope in that 25. - No, I was going up for sure. - You don't know if you're going to be the very last or one through 25. - Oh, I see. - You have hopes, 'cause you go through like one through 10, you're like, this is a packed house. - That's nice. - That's packed? - Yeah. - Oh yeah. - Oh wow. - It was a great mic. - Yeah. - Oh wow, it's still going on. I think so. - Yeah. - And the booker is there too, so sometimes he helps you get into the club. - Oh, I see. What's the club? West Side? It's on Santa Monica, right? - Yeah. - Didn't Neil Brennan have a show there? - Yeah. - I used to play there. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - It's a great spot. I like that spot. - Yeah, you are sometimes going up very last one in the morning. - Wow. - Just me. - Cross armed watching Trevor Wallace. - Yeah, like this kid is cooked. - Probably wasn't good. I'll say that, but yeah, I remember there was a outside mic somewhere in like Marina Del Rey. It was like in a shack behind a coffee shop. - Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. - Venice grind. - Yes. That's why I heard the McChicken antibiotics joke. (laughing) - Is that your joke? - Oh wow. - Remember any of my jokes from the night I went up at West Side? (laughing) I remember all this about you. I thought we were a tip for 10, this bitch. - Yeah, yeah. - I'm not, I'm not, I'm a little moved right now, Trevor. - Really? - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - You see a lot of people out there, and then you start to see the same faces, and so many people kind of like fall in and out of it, but like when you just see the same exact faces, there's a trust in your head, we were like, okay, I'm not, I'm not, I know this person, but I like know that they're dedicated about it. - Wow. - Yeah. - 'Cause I haven't done, I don't wanna, I'm not bragging, I'm just saying, I'm old. - Yeah. - Right, but I used to do it. Like all this stuff reminds me, 'cause we used to have a brew house in Westwood. That was that kind of thing. Where you were there, I don't remember very sober being there, I just, I feel like this might work in there. - I was just like, right? - I feel like this might work in there, right? - People talk about this might work. - Yeah, yeah, but it was like, it was still a mic, and you had to wait there for sometimes hours to go off. - Was there a room that isn't around anymore that you like missed, there was like the mecha? I know people talk about the parlour used to be like, great, was that it? - parlour was okay, but double is the greatest room. - What was that? - You don't know about double. And what is it now? Like an Alfred coffee? (laughing) - I think it's empty. - I hear places, there was like two places like Jay Davis ran, and that's like where Dane could grow. - Yeah, that's the only place. - Was it Dublin? - Yeah. - And it was a good room. - Tuesday night, Dublin, it was, oh my god, can I tell you about this room? - Yeah, please. - No, it's right across the street from the comedy story. It's between the comedy story and the laugh act, right? - The little goofs of comedy. - Yeah, what like, so it was Tuesday nights upstairs, and Dane was sort of the focal point of the show. But you would walk into this packed room, and it was just in Timberlake, Cameron Dia. I mean, everyone was there. All people who could convert you. - Yeah, all of that, all convert everyone in there. - To every religion, yeah. - But you would also have every agent and manager. I gave back key, I mean, just everybody was there. - At the open mic. - No, it was kind of a book show. - A book show. - And you would perform, and if you killed, you would walk off state, I'm not kidding you. And people, you would just see business cards from everyone. - Yeah. - You're old. - Yeah. - Yeah, pretty old, yeah. - I can't get you off today, you're, yeah. - I can't piss you off, I love this energy. - I think it's wrong. I think that let's probably be as wrong, because normally, you would have said these things. I would have gotten angry. - We also brought the door guy here to convert you. - And what year was this show? Like what years were like you brought? - No, this is early 2000s. - Yeah, 2000, four or 2005, that used to be something that aren't. - Why are these, why are so many questions about it? - We're just sitting in the history. - Yeah, you're our elder. - Yeah, I don't know. - You were trying to question, see if I did open mic. - No, we know, you did. - We know, we know. - No, but like these were good shows back then. Yeah, but there were questioning whether you did open mic. - But a lot, a lot, do you guys know who Jordy Foxes or Jordy Elder? - Okay, anyway. (laughing) - Explain. (laughing) - No, 'cause he worked for ATC for a very long time, he's an executive, he worked at Comedy Central as an executive, but he was a stand-up at one point, and him and I have had many war stories about certain gigs that we would just sit there for hours, there would be no audience, and we would still go up in front of nobody, and this is for years we did that. - You ever bomb in front of somebody really important? - Oh my God, you have all the fucking time, and what are you talking about? Can I tell you the war story? - Yes, we would love that. - And one day my manager, and I almost fired her for this, I should have fired her, I had a Montreal showcase, but she sent it up at Freaky Mondays or something, it was like the chocolate sundaers, the back there we had like these black nights, you know, chocolate sundays. - I think that's what. - Mondays, what? - Mondays, you know? - No, no, no, no, what was called Freaky Mondays? Fat Tuesday, right? Chocolate sundays. - Chocolate sundays. - Yeah, yeah, I mean, there was all these rooms. I don't know what, you know what I mean? Chocolate one, I do. (all laughing) - What a chocolate one. - Yeah, I don't know of the flavored ones I did, but there you go. Is that better? - Yeah. - But it was, so not only did Montreal come out, but Abby goes, I called everybody, Will Smith's production company. I mean, all these fucking people. - Why Will Smith? - I don't know, because she had a big production company back then. - Oh wow. - She invited, like, half the town. And I was on, I was about to go up, but then somebody comes up to me and go, "It's an old blockroom," and I don't generally do good. And, you know what I mean? Because what happens is I have a Southern California kind of a vibe, but for some reason, when I'm around Mexicans or a blockroom, I change my accent. - Code switcher. I code switcher. - You do code switcher. - Hey, bro, how you doing? Like, that's a Mexican, yeah? - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - You know what I mean? That's my room. - You ever do that? - All the time. - Yeah, you code switch. - Oh, yeah, yeah. - But I'll never code switch in front of like a Korean though. - That feels the worst. - That feels it, yeah. - What are you doing? - Yeah, that's what I mean. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - I want to be in the same environment as everybody. - Yeah. - I'm gonna say wave. - I love white rooms. - Yeah. - What's up, everybody? Good to see you. - Yeah. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - So when you wait, some guy came up to me, he goes, "Listen, these two kids are gonna go up before you." And they go, "Who are they?" They're like seven, eight-year-old rappers. - What? - Yeah, and I go, "All right." - What? - And they go up and say, "This was your one song." They're in their third song, and they're getting standing ovation. - Oh, no. - And then the host goes up and goes, "You guys have to leave because we have other comics," right? And they never left the stage. And what the host did was, brought me up while the kids were still on stage. - Oh, yeah. - Were they rapping to your set? - No, but they were like, "You know what I mean? "Do we?" - Yeah, yeah. - In the background. - Interpreting, dancing to your joke? - Yeah, and as soon as I open my mouth, I fucking-- - Said the N-word? - Paul. (laughing) - You cranberry. - Yeah, yeah. It was, "Bomb," and my friend Jonathan Gautzick, right? It was at the improv, and I could see him, you know, at that doorway area? - Of course I. - And I could see his face, and I could see him go, shake his head like that. - Oh. - And go, like we locked eyes. And I almost started to cry. - Oh, yeah. - I bombed that hard. - Do you remember your first sentence out when you're on stage? Like, "To make you bomb?" At the first, here's my opening line, didn't it work? - No. - So I used to miss my hair up. - Oh, yeah. - Right? - Yeah. - And my opening line was, "I'm not really Asian, "but I just woke up." (laughing) (laughing) - Yeah, and that's paper, that should work. - No, that normally didn't work. That normally worked. - I'm dying. - But if it doesn't work, I'm fine. - I used to get in my head. - What's your backup? - That there is none, right? So I'm like, if that doesn't work, 'cause that's like a strong, back then was my strong opening, right? So I said it, I go. But I said it more, you know what I mean? - A black sense? "I'm not really Asian, I just woke up." (laughing) - And eat it, and then I see Jonathan shake his head. You ever see somebody get boot off stage? - Oh yeah. - I saw it once in Sacramento. - Oh yeah. - The riveting to see. - Have you ever been booted? - Because I feel like a wrong football team or something. - Oh, right, right, right, right, right. - The bill's stuck and then all the testosterone comes going on. - You saw a comic in Sacramento get boot off stage? - Yeah, this guy Lance Woods is a Sacramento comic. I was doing shows of the punch line years ago. He was like, "Do come to this room." It's an urban room, we should do it. And the guy in front of me, I'll never forget this picture. He's a white guy in shorts. And he starts talking about his, getting his ass eight by his girlfriend. And the crowd is not having any. - White guy in shorts. - Yeah, white guy in shorts. And you hear a guy in the back, "Oh hell no!" - Yeah, yeah. - Next. - Yeah. - Next, so he's jiggling the keys and they go, "Get him off stage, get him off." And I was up next. So why don't white? Already? - No, no, no, no. - But through him under the bus and immediately got a pop. I was like, "I'm white, but I'm not that white." And they're like, (laughing) "But it was yeah." - Wow. - Great job, boot off stage. - Wow, wow, wow, wow. - Yeah, you had to take your shorts off and be like, "Oh fuck." - Oh yeah, they're jorks, they're jorks. (laughing) But yeah, that was the first time I ever, - Did you see it? - Did you console them afterwards this guy or no? - Fuck, no, I didn't associate with him at all. (laughing) - Yeah, I was like, I was like, "What, the audacity of white people, man." - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - I said I was mixed or something. (laughing) - He parked rush in the weld to something. - But seeing a guy before you getting booted to get off stage, is you hear about the shit like, the dev genius, the jingling keys, you get off stage, boot, and when you're next in that, not a fun environment to me. - Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - And he just leaves, he's like, "Okay, I gotta get out of here." - Oh yeah, he didn't stick around. - Whoa. - He went straight to Reddit and was like, "Well, I got a piece of my mind." - Oh, I don't know what he did, but I hate when people double down on their bum. - Oh yeah. - And they defend it. When I bum, I go inside myself and I destroy myself. So I can rebuild, right? I never go, "No, man, that audience, "I was good, I'm never like that." I try to kill myself tonight. - Yeah, it's him. - That's even when you have an amazing set. - I do that too, yeah. - That's the worst thing I've ever done. - I never go, you know what I mean? Go, "Oh, you know what I mean?" It was them. I stick around to see the next comic to see, "Was it truly them?" - Yeah. - Or before you ask, sometimes like, "I'll be at the store," and I'll see really great guys not get big gloves. And then I know. I'll even ask 'em and go, "Was it they tough?" They're like, "They were fucking tough." - You need that second person. - I do, I do, yeah, yeah, yeah. - I just sat in the OR a few weeks ago and Tim Dillon was next. And I was bombing so bad. I saw him put his hands on his head. - Oh. - Oh. - And then I had to introduce him and he goes up and he does not as well as Tim Dillon. Well, he does it, I'm like so embarrassed. So I wanted to watch him be like, "Okay, I think it was me." But the audience is really bad. And then he comes up to me and he goes, "Those guys fucking socks, huh?" - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Okay, that's okay. - Sometimes they just suck there. - Yeah. - Tim doesn't bomb a lot, but one time I saw him go up on a girl's got to eat show. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - And it was me, him, and one other person. He just wasn't connecting with him for about 10 minutes. - Yeah. - And it's like pretty quiet. And I love Tim. I'm in the bag dying. - Yeah. - And then he just flips and he goes, "You know what? "Fuck all of you. "I have a Bentley out front. "I have my Bentley out." - Yeah, yeah. "Hollywood Hills, while you low miserable fucks "are paying for comedy for a woman's podcast." - Like this five minute, Bill Burr and Philly-ass speech, it was one of the best things I've ever seen. - I like when Tim bombs, because he doubles down. - He's the best. - He's the best. - So funny. - Yeah. - And he got out of it. It was great to see. - He's the best. - He doesn't back down, which is amazing. It just keeps it. - Yeah, yeah. - What a great, yeah. I once at the improv saw somebody walk out, they see me in the hallway. They're like, "Oh, what's up, Trevor?" I was like, "Do Tim noonson." You got to go watch him. He goes, "I'm on shrooms right now. "It is just too much." - I totally, yeah, I don't need to think about the federal reserve. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - I'm good. - Yeah. He literally is one of my favorites to watch. - Yeah. - So goddamn good. - He's so good. - Oh my God. - What? - No, I just agree. I saw him in the main room a few days ago. - Yeah. We've seen him too many times. - Okay. I was just. - Have we not? - You guys ever kissed? (laughing) - Yeah, we have. - I actually have. - You guys are happy, aren't you? - Don't say why. - Yeah, yeah. - You have to say why. - I got paid. - I got paid to do a lot. - Yeah, she got paid to. - Oh, yeah. - Yeah. - Sort of. - Like a make-a-wish thing. Who's an acting thing? - Who's an acting thing? - Kind of an island situation. We'll talk about it. - It's an acting thing. - Yeah. - How much did you get paid? - Not a lot. - Under a hundred or over. - Over. Actually, yeah, over. - Okay, you know what? I don't even get to get paid a lot, but you do me a big favor. And the benefits outweigh the money. - What? - That's true. (laughing) - You're disgusting. - I do not find you disgusting. - Yeah, you find me disgusting. - You find me disgusting. - I don't find you disgusting. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. You said that. - No, I did it. - You told me you were I was disgusting. - No, I never said that. - Yeah, okay. - Anyway. - How did you get paid for this opportunity? I love Cat Bird. I think that she is out of the segment of what's at the Columbia store I know, but she's a rising star. I believe that with the Ramsey. There's a couple of people I feel that about at the store. - Did you believe that with Trevor? - Sometimes I'm wrong. - Were you right about him? - By the time I met Trevor, he was already doing well. - Thank you. - No, what I'm saying is that, 'cause I don't do the other shows. I only do club shows. - Yeah. - So as soon as you started showing up at the promoted shows, the monarchs, these are the things. - Yes, yes. - That's when I would watch her and go, "Oh, this guy's good." - Right. - Okay. - But I didn't watch the struggle. - Right. - You were already established. Same with your Michael Blastine. - Close enough. - Yeah, yeah. - The Blastine. - The Michael Blastine. - He's a bigster. - What's his name? (laughing) - Michael Blastine. - The Blastine. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - The Blastine. - I think he took over a week and four Michael Blastine. - Oh, he's saying. - That's a crazy much. - And people canceled, but saw Blastine, and didn't like read it again. They showed up thinking it was gonna be him. - Oh my God. - Which is very funny. - It's hilarious. - Did they get refunds or? - I mean. - They probably enjoyed the sell. - I imagine. - I was just kidding. - Did we get a side by side? - I feel like Michael might have a slight crossover. I feel like they probably liked this bit. - A little bit. - Michael does well in all rooms, but Michael Blastine is one of the funniest guys. - Yeah, yeah. - Oh my God. - Did he come out wearing like a Dashiki? - I hope so. Similar to Jostrosion. - Wait, now, they must have walked into the club and saw Michael Blastine's photo. 'Cause sometimes photos are up. - Yeah. - And they probably would, they weren't surprised in the room, probably, no. - They probably were. - Yeah, I would imagine they were. - Some of them, yeah, wow. - Yeah. - That's crazy. - But maybe they were, maybe I read it wrong. - Yeah. - He felt that we can form and people didn't read it. - I got booked for a Henry Cho gig. - Okay. - People both thought that I was Henry Cho, right? - Yeah. - And the day I was flying out, it was a corporate gig. - Yeah. - Him, right? The guy called me and goes, hey, I just want you to let you know. You're not the Southern guy, right? (laughs) - Yeah. - Oh, no, you're thinking about Henry Cho. They go, yeah, yeah, don't come. (laughs) - Don't come. - Yeah, I'm like, okay, yeah, damn. - You don't Henry? - I don't know, I don't know. - I love him. - I feel like I said. - He's a legend. - Yeah, I still really enjoyed his comedy central half hours, like one of the first ones I ever saw. - Yeah, yeah. - He's great. - I like the denim. - Yeah. - And he's a. - Korean. - You guys know Korean comics? - I'm a big fan. - A few. - Yeah, can you name me three Korean comics? - Joel Kim Booster. - Oh, oh, Joe Koy. (laughs) - He's Filipino, right? Look at this. - Oh my god. - Oh, I guess you did the hair thing. - Yeah, that's what, that was, I did that show. I'm not, I'm not, I'm not alive. You came out today and did that opener? - I'd still work. - I'd still die. - Wait, wait, wait, hold on. - Yeah, yeah. - Well, yeah, I would, - Do you notice my voice in that? - It's crazy. - It's very hype. You guys wanna hear a little bit of voice in that? - No, no, please don't, please don't. - Just so they know, just so they know. - Okay, please. - Just like, high, high, high. - All right, that's enough. - I broke my hair like this. I'm gonna get this out of the way. (audience laughs) 'Cause Asian people look alike. (laughs) And I wanted to look a little different. (audience laughs) But Asian people don't even know I'm Asian now. - You're a voice. - Your voice is so different. - I know, you stuck like this. - Do you know why? - You're putting it on. - Oh, he's definitely on 10 minutes set. I think it's like one of the best. - 'Cause then that was when Christopher blew up. - Yeah, it's it. - As a stand-up. So I'm like, oh, I'm gonna do a high-pitched voice. - It's fucking stupid. (audience laughs) And then later I realized, oh, just be yourself. - Yeah. - Yeah. - You're trying to be an Asian, Christopher, it's hilarious. - That's Jackie Chan. - Yeah, yeah. (audience laughs) - Many movies on it. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Yeah, the things that I went through, a changes, you know what I mean? Did you change a lot? - Or were you always you? - No, I think I had my changes. I think that there's times where there was, when I got really big, it was when Delia was really big. - Oh, right. - Not when I got really big, sorry. When I first started and you'd see so many people on mics kind of like the manner is how they pull the phone and not the phone, the mic and a lot of that. And then like I get, a lot of people do like burn, and stuff like that, but I think you try it all on. You see what fits the best. - Yeah, I think every guy is like, you know, parts of little pieces. - You do it long enough to find yourself. - Right. - That's a good way. 'Cause we all had a different specific cadence. That we, you know, we just watched on TV. Oh, this is how you're supposed to do it. Why, I like David Tells. Well, you know, I'll do it. - Yeah, it's like wine. There's notes of other people that you can see in there. - But then one day you're just kind of, I mean, when you, 'cause when I look at you, all three of you, I see you. I don't see other people. - Yeah, yeah, early days, I put on a voice. I had like a weird rose, I was like, "Hey, what's up, man?" - It's really bad. - Oh, like a Roddy Daniel. - I don't know, I was trying to sound grittier, I think. I don't know. I thought I'd supposed to. - Yeah, yeah. - I'm from David Tells. - Yeah, really bad. - Take my wife, please. She has a lot of job. Take my wife. - Whatever, what do they wear? - Her job. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - She's got her job. - Yeah, her job. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Beautiful. - Wear, though. - Thank you for saying that. - Yeah, I appreciate that. - I appreciate that. - What's the point? - Thank you for her job. - Oh, to protect a woman's modus. - Sexism. - Oh, is that one? - Yeah, sorry. - Yeah. - Yeah. - Are they breathable? - Yeah. - Yeah, bro. - Nike hext. - Nike, yeah. - How is Under Armour not been like we got plans for this? - They already do. - They do. - Bro, my mom's got some Nike hijabs. - Well, the Olympics too, right? - Can you know a woman's heart just by this area? - Okay, Bobby. This is. - No, can you? - Can I? Yeah, I could. - Well, great, Charles. - Oh, shit, is that a. - It's not the eye of that. - But that's a shistie. That's like what they wear in old blocks. - Yeah. - Yeah. - Oh, does it Nike hijab? - Yeah. - For your buck. - I think Conn makes. - Oh, dope. That shit is hard. Yeah. You can tell she's beautiful. - Well, yeah, you can see her face. - Yeah. - Yeah. (laughing) - I'd like to be blurred out during this part of possible. Are you being real? - No, I'm kidding. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Okay. - You know, Ray Charles used to touch the wrists of women to see if they were pretty. - Really? - Yeah. - I could tell. - I could, absolutely. - Yeah. - Just on wrist alone. - Yeah. - I would think Trevor's a beautiful woman. - Yeah, I felt just wrist. - I think I felt my wrist now. - No, I would be like, are you ready to go with you? I'd go, maybe if I can't find anybody else. - Yeah, yeah. - I'd be a wrist. - Yeah. I'm a 2A of it's joy. - Yeah. - 100%. - Can I have your wrist? - Yeah, yeah, go. - I'm going to close your eyes up. - Pretend you're blind. - Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I'd get a pacemaker on this. - I was just sleeping right here. - Yeah. - Well, good wrist. - Smooth. - I'm getting older, man. I don't have high blood pressure. - God, sorry. - I'm trying to do better. Oh, but my eating. Ray Charles, do you think people lie down a lot? - Oh. - Yeah, of course. - You're like him, particularly, or just blind? - Well, like if I was Ray Charles, like assistant, or whatever, and Ray's like, "Hey, that girl in my last night. She hot?" - I go, "Yeah." - Even if she wasn't? - It was a dude. (laughing) - Yeah. - I probably stretch the truth a little bit more. - Yeah. - I would. - What specifics if I was blind? - Yeah. - Oh. - Yeah, let's see. Okay. - Especially when he's paying me. - You guys are my team. - Sure. - All right. - Okay. - Hey, well. - Hey, what's going on? - Hey. - Hey, hey. - What's going on? - You got a 2 p.m. today? (laughing) - A 2 p.m. - Yeah, yeah, just letting you write your meetings and stuff like that. - You also owe a-- - What's the weather like? - It's pretty good. - It doesn't matter for you. (laughing) - Hey, who said that? - It's your wife. (laughing) - Praveen. - Oh, no, that's Trevor. That's Trevor. - That's very funny Trevor. - Anyway, after the show last time, I met that woman. - Oh, he's Chris Tucker again? (laughing) - Yeah, I met that woman, you know? - Yeah, yeah. - Kataliana. - Yeah, it's hard. - Yeah, it's so hard. - What'd she look like? - Oh, man. - Asian? - Okay, I'm okay with that. I don't know what that means. (laughing) - He just, I don't know what that means. - Oh, I just-- - Exotic. - Yeah, beautiful. - Yeah. You mean the eyes? I could touch the eyes. - Yeah. - She's incredible. - When I touched her eyes, I knew she was Asian. She was either sleeping. (laughing) - Oh, she was Asian. - She started to recognize you. - Yeah, she was. - Anyway, 'cause I'm Asian, right? I touched my own eyes, I know. Yeah, so she's Asian. What else? - Great face. - Oh, what kind of face? Describe the face. - Slender? Good nose? - No, no holes. - No holes. - No holes. Not like yours. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Wrong. (laughing) - Well, yeah. Give me your nose, I wanna read a book. (laughing) Anyway, thank you, Ramsey. What else? What's the body like? - Great abs. - No hair on her tits? - Oh, you know I don't like that. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Uh-huh. - I could touch the presses. - Yeah. - Yeah, so I know what they seem like. - Okay, yeah. - Yeah, the body. - The body was probably seven out of 10. - Yeah. - Booze. - Is that good? - It's good, it's great. - It's great. - It's good, it's good. - It's great, yeah. - Bruises, a few. - We were in Jacksonville. (laughing) - Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. - That's okay, it's normal over there. - Yeah, where are the bruises? - On the knees? - The. - Couple were sort of under the armpits. - Face. - Yeah, okay, okay, red place. - What about skin? - Black. - Dark, like your vision. (laughing) - Real good. - I see. - Nice. - Sit just a bit, you could be anybody. - Yeah. - You carry where you're blind anyway. - That's right. - What do you carry? - No, what do you care? - Oh. - Like vision really. - So if you were blind and some door guy came up to you and was like, do you wanna talk about Jesus? - What would you say? - I'd be like, no, Jesus, Jesus fuck me. (laughing) We're both with no eyes. - No, no, no. - We're blind. - Yeah, I wanna talk about Satan. - Yeah, I wanna talk about that. - Yeah, but you know, if you're blind, you know, just as long as they smelled good. - And sound good. - And they sounded good. - And they were nice, right? And they just kind of felt, you know what I mean? They could look like anybody. - Oh yeah, they got to feel good. - Yeah, they got to feel good, I think. It's more about that sensation. - That would just be crazy to have someone just touch you immediately, just to pet you, to see if they like you. - Oh, yeah, that is weird, yeah. - Right. - Yeah. - And you have to be returals. - Yeah. - You can't be just like, you know. - Just be like the guy, I mean, I'm a key maker. Not that guy. - Also a wild profession for a blind man, Kimi. (laughing) - Yeah, that's true. - A locksmith. (laughing) - Really? - Yeah, yeah. - Heavy machine. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - What would be a good blind lifeguard? - Pottery. - Pottery. - Why? - Pottery. - Because you're itself touch. - Oh, it's touch. - It's touch. - Shame. - Oh yeah, yeah. - Okay. - Missouce? - Missouce is a good one. - Then that gets a little tricky. - Oh yeah. - You're a little too low. - Happy ending. - Third leg. - Ah, I say, I say, I say, I say, I say, very good. Yeah, yeah. At Berk Williams, the most sought-after Missouce person was a blind Russian. And I had him a couple of times. And he was amazing. - You prefer a guy? - He was the best because he was blind. So, I know he was just good. I think because his sense is with his hands. - Uh-huh. - Yeah, it's more-- - Oh shit. - Did they have somebody like walk him into the room? - Oh, that's awesome. They take off his robe. - Yeah. - I don't know. - He's naked for something. - We play Marco Polo. (laughing) - I got Marco-- - Polo, he's in a different room. And that took about two hours. - Yeah. - That was fun. - You get a really good blind, Missouce? - Yeah, yeah, yeah. And what is this line of eyes working here? Yeah, perception massage. - I don't know about this. It feels weird this ad for some reason. - Yeah, yeah. - 'Cause she's just like-- - Yeah. - As long as he's tied, I'd be okay with it. - Oh, Russian is a bit. I know that picture's been taken. - Yeah. - Is everybody blind? (laughing) - I'm the person getting the thoughts. - Yeah. - No, they're all Asian, dude. (laughing) - You're Asian. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - The person laying down is-- - The person on the right has-- (laughing) - What? - Yeah. - I thought they were all blind. - No, the ones that are doing the massaging are blind. - All blind, that's the massaging. (laughing) - Oh, you think it's a blind place for blind people, too? - No, I think-- - You know what I mean? - Everybody's blind? - Can we flag this? There's a Braille photo in the background like they can see that. (laughing) But there's not Braille on it. So why are they putting Braille in there? - Yeah, yeah. - Who is that floor? - Yeah. - It's for the-- - Yeah. - They feel good about themselves. Oh, look at me. I'm helping blind people. - Well, how's she gonna put that on? - Oh, so why does she have a blind spot on? Why does she need it to know they're blind? - Damn. Damn, dude. - Maybe it vibrates after the time is up. - Maybe. - Definitely one bad masseuse went in there and pretended to be blind. - There's no question. - Why is that the right time? Is that right though? I'll tell you that right now. (laughing) - Yeah. - Real fun jokes about the blind. - That's crazy. - Yeah, but yeah, I think your sense is right when you're blind is more heightened. - I'm blind. - Like your sense of smell and taste, do you think or no? - Yeah, absolutely. - Yeah, you don't need me. - You don't need me. - Do you have a daredevil? - Oh yeah. - Super hero. - Yeah. - Blind chef would be interesting. - Yeah, blind chef one. - So good. - Has TLC done anything with the blinds? - It's a good question. - I feel like TLC loves it. - Yeah, yeah. - A good disability. - It's something, yeah. - Yeah. - That's how they pitch shows are like, yeah, yeah. It's cooking, but what if they couldn't see? - Chopped, but we chopped their videos. - Well, there's the blind photographers, you know that, right? - What? - Yeah, there was a documentary on HBO about blind, there's a couple of professional blind photographers. - It's like this is a photo got in the woman's restaurant. (laughing) - Yeah. - No, I didn't know about that. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - And it's, they can sense based on the environment. - I think somebody tells them what to shoot. - Okay. - They have an assistant and you go. - So they have eye. - Yeah, yeah. - Is it good? - But they're just, yeah. - Yeah, John, I think that's it. - Yeah, John. - A camera operator. - Can you look it up? - Yeah. - The famous blind photographer. - But this one is, the winner of master chef season three is a blind woman. - Oh, if you lose a blind woman, you gotta get out of a restaurant. - Yeah, yeah. - You gotta quit that day. - Yeah, but you feel, how do you feel about yourself when you demolish a blind woman in master chef? - Good, she's blind. I should be. - Yeah. (laughing) - Chopper, that. - I wouldn't beat her by like a lot, but like a person. - You'd have to gotta listen. I will control 50/50 on that, but she's blind. You're 50/50. (laughing) - Yeah, fair. - She's chopper-owned festivals? - She has someone that tells her where to chop. - Cheating. - Cheating. - Yeah, she's got a chopper-owned festival. - I'm with you, Bob. - Don't you think? - Yeah, I'm with you. - She was the blind one. - She's cute too. - And she won, yeah, yeah, yeah. - Definitely helps, so she's cute, yeah, I'm sure. (laughing) - If I was blind, would you say that I was cute or not, would you lie to me? - Where are we on the tour? - Yeah, are you trying to cross the street than you're a cute man? - Yeah, you know what I'm saying? - We're friends, one day we're just hanging around and I'm gonna stand, I'm gonna stand down. - Yeah. - Right, there you go. Hey guys, FYI, I just want to ask a name. Would you guys consider it gonna be hot? I don't know, I'll never see myself. - Am I opening for you at the time? - Yes, you are. - Yes, I would say you look beautiful. - Well, you're not opening for me. - I'm not opening for you. - Yeah, what would you say? - I'd say you look nice. - Can I open for you? (laughing) - So you wouldn't say that, so I'm not attractive. - What do you mean, you're attractive? - I think you're attractive. - What did you say that? But what if. - But if you were looking back, if you were looking particularly bad that day, I wouldn't tell you is what I'm saying. - Oh, I say. - But you live with that. - But in general, you would say that I'm decent looking. - Yeah, I would say you're a decent looking guy, but it's not interesting. - Yeah. - I think you're. I would say that about all three of you, probably. - Yeah. - Should we start our only fan staff? What do you think has been the hottest era of Bobby? Is it right now? Is it 10 years ago? Matt T.B. - 'Cause now, now is better than the photo that we, or the video that we saw earlier. - What was this? - The blind photographer. - Yeah. - Sija Korn, like Korn, the band spelled. That's cool. - Baker's field. - Yeah, what is she taking photos of though? - Oh, she's feeling it. - She feels it first, yeah. - The lens cap is on the whole time. (laughing) - I want to show the world. - It looks like my vision. - Yeah, what I see. - Yeah. - Yeah. - Yeah. - I kind of fold with this. This is kind of sick. She's over the camera. - I kind of get erotic the way she touches someone. - I know. - Yeah. - She does like the portraits from middle schoolers. She's like, hold still. - Yeah. - Yeah. - She's photographing herself, like thinking she's looking at yourself. - Oh, so she does preparation. - Yeah. - Right. - She feels things out, right? - And that angle is awful. - Yeah. - She's supposed to be looking at the camera. (laughing) That's the most fucked thing out of the world. - She's the better for the photo. - How do you know that? - Yeah. - Is that good? - She's like, I'm a dizzy man, right? - Yeah. - Yeah. - Oh my god. - That's the husband. - The guy is weird. Oh, that's her husband. - Yeah. - Okay, rocks. - Yeah. - Anyway, let's move on from this. - She would rip on Killtony. (laughing) - But, golden ticket winner. - Yeah. - Golden ticket winner. - Have you guys ever done Killtony? - I think when it first became a show, I did in the belly room. Way back in the day. - Yeah, but you would do it now. - No. - You would draw. Would you draw? - I don't think so. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. Why? - I don't know. - It's a lot of exposure. But I don't know if I'm in, I don't know. I guess if it were to, it's just as it seemed for me. - Your Bobby Lee, you have nothing going on in your life. Let's say, would you do, is that something you would do? - Well, you already have nothing going on now. - Yeah. - Yeah, I would not do it. - Yeah. - Yeah. - Yeah. - Anything to promote? - I'm shooting a special in Arizona. March 13th and 14th at the Orpheum. - Oh, nice theater. - And then I'm on tour of a whole Texas run, doing a bunch of places, St. Louis, Kansas City. Memphis. - That's awesome. - I already did Jacksonville, great city. Alabama, Texas, why don't we-- - Did you get anyone in Jacksonville? - I met a guy who was smoking a joint, and as I approached him, he put it out and stomped it out with the feet, and he said, "Oh shit, I thought you were a cop." (laughing) On brand for my face. Are these all theaters that you're playing? - Yeah, yeah. - Is it huge? - Wow. - Yeah, man, I'm in the middle of a tour right now, and it's been a lot of fun. - Wow, wow, it's been a lot of fun. - You prefer that over the clubs? - Yes and no, I mean, it just depends based on, I think music venues kind of suck for comedy, 'cause they're dense, so the laughs kind of go up and down. - Yeah. - But traditional theaters are fucking incredible, so much fun. - Yeah. - But there's just certain clubs that are just, you know, better than some music venues. - Oh, that's the merch. - Yeah, I hired a really cool, like merch, like downtown LA, like, you know, like-- - Yeah. - That's cool. - Guy, and he's right. He just knows the vibe. - Yeah, yeah. - Unemployed, kind of. - He's the best, he's so good. - Good vibes. - But yeah, I'm on tour right now at TrevorWolfs.com. And I'm so excited for your special to come out. Just hearing what you did for years with the effects is really cool, now I'm like, fuck, I gotta up my game. - I don't know how it's gonna turn out, but thank you. - It's gonna be great. - Well, there's, you've been edging everybody for 30 years. - I don't know. - This nut is gonna be tremendous. - Yeah. - I love. (laughs) - Just practicing your blood face. (laughs) - Yeah. - Give Trevor a round of applause. - Woo! - And thank you for having me. - Oh, always a pleasure. - Coming on. (upbeat music) (upbeat music)