Travis' Return, Mama Kelce Renovates & Conan O’Brien on Oscars Prep, Favorite Jokes & More | EP 182

You said you're trying some of these jokes out in these comedy clubs. Would you try some of them out with us right now? We don't have to put it in the episode. We can cut them. I absolutely will not. Dang, it's all right. Fair enough. And I don't trust you. I'm going to be honest with you. That's fair. That is very fair. You have a great reputation. You seem like good guys. You're a wholesome, Ohio boys, but I don't. I think you're going to leak these. You're going to flip me over. And you're going to laugh. And then you're going to high five each other. Oh, this is going to be such a lousy show after f***ing hanging with it. Oh, no. I'm getting in for an hour, dude. We got some good stuff to talk about Travis. It's not going to be Conan, but it's still a big good show. Yeah, I don't barely ever look at the rundown. I looked a little bit at Conan's rundown, but. Well, I mean, have you been paying attention? I mean, 87's coming back. How about that? Come on now. Come on now. Yeah, we're doing it again. That'd be fun. Get to read now with my friends. Do we want to wait for the insurance? We just talked about it now. Well, what point did you know for sure you were coming back? About midway through the season. So, what were you waiting on then? You know, I think I was taking Jason Kelsey's advice. I was taking the advice. It's take a step back. Because you know, you got to let the emotions clear. And you got to have a clear head. I've made decisions based off of emotions. And, you know, they haven't always played out the right way. So, I think taking a step back, letting the emotions settle down, the frustrations from the season. Of course, I want to come back. Of course, I don't want to end my career not making the playoffs, not having one of the best years and, you know, definitely having a down year and all that. So, I think taking a step back and letting it kind of build. And, you know, what's my desire? What's my body feel like? How did I feel going into this year versus coming out of this year and where my body was at? And, you know, even letting it kind of settle, it's still felt like I was hungry enough to get back at it. And obviously, there's still a little bit of that grid and that emotion that, you know, I fucking hated the way that shit ended last year. And I want to do this, I want to make it right, you know? I don't want to get another chance in another fucking Super Bowl, man. Yeah, so the addition of Kenneth Walker and Patrick Mahomes rehabilitation and nothing to do with it? Oh, no. No, I know that Pat was going to be Pat and he's going to work his fucking tail off to get back and be at his best. I knew that was a no-brainer. My new coach Reed was going to make adjustments. I knew Vich is going to do his best to get the best guys in here. We've got Eric B. Enemy, one of my favorite coaches of all fucking time coming back into the building. But outside of, I wanted to take a step back from all of that because that adds to the emotion of wanting to play again. Sure. You know, those are all, you list these pros and cons and all of a sudden we get all these good pieces. But where's my body at? And where's my, like, mental determination, my focus, my love for the game, all of that's still there. So once I let that kind of settle and the coaches and the Kansas City Chiefs knew all that going into the off season. So well, welcome back. Let's uh, let's welcome back another episode. New heights. How about that? Travis want to start off? Let it do it. Yeah, about it. Welcome back to new heights. Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls. It's a one tree show brought to you by Hills pet nutrition. We are your host. I'm Travis Kelsey. He's my big brother. Jason Kelsey on a Cleveland Heights. Ohio shout out to those tigers. I'm setting St. Ignatius the other day. Man, shout out to the men's basketball team. Making it through to the regionals. We're all rooting for you, baby. Heights Tigers are the basketball side are back, baby. Shout out to JR Bremmer of Heights alum as well made it to the NBA. He's turned that program around, man. Believe in Heights, baby. The Tigers are back, man. But yeah, shout out to the Tigers. Shout out to the Heights for for getting back St. Ignatius, man. St. Ignatius has always been a powerhouse in all sports. But they're not basketball like this is upsetting. St. Ignatius like Cleveland Heights is somehow like big underdogs. Again, St. Ignatius basketball is freaking always one of the best teams in the state. What are we talking about? Yeah, notoriously. Yeah, I mean, we're definitely known as a basketball school for sure. And Ignatius has kind of always been, you know, like. Coach Camp Letty. Shout out to Coach Camp, baby. Coach Camp over 30 decades built that program. Yeah, he did. Shout out to no blue for fucking sinking a shot to win it or with a dagger. I guess they won fucking like by 10 or whatever it was because they weren't the underdogs. Nice. Make sure you subscribe on YouTube or wherever you get your podcast. If all the show and all social media at New Heights show with one to ask. Jason wants to tell the people what we have coming up this episode. 92% is we've got another great episode. The big yeti is back for year 14. My goodness. We also have some other major home renovation news and Conan O'Brien is here. Oh, yeah. That's right, Bubba. Let's get into it right now and a little bit of that new news. New news. New news is brought to you by American Express. And let's talk about the most important news out of the Kelsey film this week. We know everybody's been waiting to hear about it. Everybody's on edge of their seat. And we wanted to wait to break this news on the show. But reports have already started to leak out. Yes, I already knows about it, ma'am. We got to talk about it. Yeah, as mentioned, the tweet that leaked out has been viewed over 24 million times. Donna Kelsey is remodeling her modest Florida home. Let's give it up for Donna. Mama, mama, mama. Mama Kels. Mama, I told her she needed me to like screw some door hinges in. I could have fucking done it for her. But I guess she wants to do the whole remodel. Yeah, I mean, I gotta say, I gotta say modest home. Listen, Donna's changed. Nine windows in six doors, ma'am. Really? We are that spoiled now. You got to do all your windows in that condo. Mama was just there. She's going to steal. What's next? The golden plated toilet or the squad of speed. I'm playing it. Fucking like faucets. I don't know. Mom, those doors seem to work just fine when I was there last month. What kind of doors is she installing? I don't know. Maybe she's got there's like a new like remote control door. You can like, you just press a button and it just opens up by itself. I don't know. Well, congratulations, mom. I can't wait to see how beautiful this home looks. It was already, it was already cozy. Which HGTV show do we think is remodeling it? It was honestly the comments. Oh, it's hilarious. All time. I mean, it was a completely absurd. 24 million, it's absolutely ridiculous. I hate to give it to him, but he was the guy's fucking strong gold with that one. Really got the people going. I just really want to know what the advertisement is for. Like what a what a what a what do we it's got to be an HGTV show, right? No chance. There's no chance they're putting out a TMZ article unless there's some type of like advertisement or some sort tied to it. No chance. I promise you. So what happens when your mom turns into reality TV? It's done a big time. She's on traders remodeling her home now. So proud of her. It is impressive. She's done it with grace. You've changed, mom. Don't you do that, Eric. Well, if you need any extra hard working men, you got two of them sitting here waiting to help you out. Yep, they're right over at the Home Depot. They're very good. I got a month's speed dial. She doesn't want us replacing it. We're going to fuck it up. She'll have to replace nine other windows. Why is it normal? I don't know how to install a fucking window. Put the fucker in there. I don't think that's how you got to like nail it down. You got to make that you got to make that thing air tight, especially kind of window she's getting. Yeah, we're going to need a ruler. You'll Kelsey way. I got. Have you asked mom about this? Have you if you talked to her about census came out? Oh, I have no idea with this. Should we ask her right now? No, it's color. Let's see how baffled she is that anybody even knows this. How fucking good would it be if she isn't doing this at all? I bet you a thousand dollars. It isn't HTT. Mom. Yes. We are doing the podcast right now. Come on with Travis. Mama. We. She gave me. She yeah, he just said hi. We are wondering. This tweet that has taken the world by storm. That's what the heck. I know even TMZ, you know, like sent me a text and said, can you be honest? This is really funny. I'm like, it's so stupid. They probably pulled a planet because they're coming on Monday to put my windows and doors in. Is it is it like an HGTV show or is this just like a legitimate random? No, I know what they're doing. They is my, my people are coming to put in my windows on Monday. Oh, nice. Well, at least you're not doing it yourself, mom. Wait, you're doing 16 windows. The article says not because you know my whole apartment is all windows. Oh, my gosh. Windows all the way around. What are you replay? Are you going bulletproof? What's happening here? What's what do we replace in the windows? Are you going bulletproof is a barrier? This year it got so cold down here. It was in the 30s and I literally had sweat coming down the windows in pools of water in my living room because it couldn't handle it. These are cheap windows that were put in 20 years ago. These damn Floridians. They don't know about the old Midwest windows, and I'm like I'm not doing this again Oh, I'm putting a new windows so I called In a South and told them I wanted them to put some windows in and this is the date that it was playing day You know the 16 and so that's next week. Yeah, so be here for three days So that's it period. Well, I just wanted to say mom I they said modest home and I just it feels like you're turning this place into a bit of a gilded palace if I must say So I think I think you've changed a little bit I think you've you've you've had a taste of their good life and now the sudden Yeah, what do you know I am so like Logical it's like I'm doing something so that I can save money on heating and air conditioning And to keep my windows from sweating. That's as simple as it is. I know. I don't we're just giving you We're just we're just we're just having fun with it too. It's amazing It is hilarious and in an awesome way So yeah, and then you know what Disney did? Parks went out there and said they took a picture of Cinderella's castle and they said this is not what Mama Kelsey is going to be renovating her My house into and so I tweeted that and said That's correct. Yeah, it's not what I'm doing Yeah, I spent almost as much time there, but I said no, nice. It's not it But I consider it my second home. Well, while they're remodeling the home Maybe Disney will let you stay in the palace as as the queen that you are I think it's so funny. It's like doesn't any is I'm terrible things happening in the world right now Okay, we don't need to talk about that. We don't need to talk about that. We don't want to talk about that I love you mama. Love you mom Travis is screaming. I love you too as well. Oh tell Travis. I'm so happy. He's going back I'm thrilled for another year. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you too. I'm doing the right things Say about a mom Nope she didn't know Yeah, can't wait to see what mom's house looks like all golden windows is Bulletproof glass and all right. I mean the TMZ article got 24 million views. Oh insane in the membrane Good saying in the brain. Sorry. All right, and let's get to the actual biggest news coming out. Travis is coming back for a year 14 We talked about a little bit up front Yeah, trap. Yeah, what how we feel how we feel? You know feeling good about the decision. I feel it excited Been texting with a few of the guys on the team Just you know ready to get this thing fucking going man. It's As you know, it's it's not a just in-season thing It's something that I truly believe you need an entire offseason to get the body of the mind ready for training camp alone And then training camp you start to get that wear and tear and like you kind of build your own armor of toughness to like get you through the season It's a year-long thing that I'm excited to get going and I'm excited to be around the guys when OTAs come around and start to really mold this team and get that get that mentality back to where it needs to be That that determination that that's that you know expectations that excellence every single day and And doing it in our own way where we show our personalities we get to stay fucking rolling Did I'm excited to see it? I'm as a fan of my brother and as someone who loves watching you play I can't wait to watch you play for another season very excited also about the Kenneth Walker signing because that guy is a Can't wait to meet the old Super Bowl MVP Man, the guys is just fucking his unbelievable man. He was explosive all year round and When Charbonne went down and he really got the chance to be the featured guy for the most part like Up in that carry load You know because you always wonder sometimes he's explosive guys when they get the full workload if it's still got that pop and it's still had that pop baby Oh, no, I'm not the only guy excited for you. I your teammates are all posted stuff Patrick my whole is posting a carousel She's uh, what is what is this alarm clock in the plane? What's that mean? This is not a plane. That's uh, it's a bow and arrow. Ah Typical Travis Kelsey Kansas City Chief celebration then we had Chris Jones on Twitter. We are so back a lot of people pumped up a lot of people pumped up man I'm just as excited to be joined in forces with those two guys men Um, and I think we all kind of had Talks at the end of the season um like I said I was always pretty optimistic that I was coming back there a lot of people in the building knew that but wanted to kind of give it some time and And refocus it and uh and let the let's choose to make some moves and figure out a lot of things first Uh to make us an all-around better team Uh, then you know, we kind of talked about some of these things as the season ended like man How are we gonna never to let it get to this fucking point again? And um and I think we're all three especially us three right there Be kind of being at the helm and being here at the longest uh and feeling like we have the most uh You know uh leadership and accountability on the team in that aspect So no doubt excited excited to get back into the building with my guys and then get the same cookin Well, we just mentioned Kenneth Walker on offense. Obviously the offense has gotten better It would appear through the first shortston of for agency, but we did we have lost some defensive players Trent McDuffy signs a huge contract There were a few guys signs some big contracts Trent McDuffy went to the Rams my guy Jalen Watson paper cups went to the Rams They got two unbelievable uh Corners and guys that are gonna fucking come into work every single day and i'm happy both of those guys got paid and then on top of that We got Brian could be cook over to Cincinnati's back home representing uh Cincinnati in the hometown for the bangles Also got paid and obviously you're happy for these guys, but man you hate to see him go because of how much you you love playing with him and all the blood Sweden that you put into to the offseason and during the season with him So it's it's tough to see these guys go elsewhere, but um i'm happy these guys are making you know lifetime money It's insane because i was thinking about this the other day the the defense has really been outstanding for the chase the past three seasons right like What spags and that 100% is been fantastic in the backfield is completely Overhauled right like you out there too with Trent McDuffy leaving now cooks like last year just and relieves Then you're uh the year before that uh, oh my god tightens. Oh you're talking about the ledgerious need Sneed yep So it's just need man Yeah, it's it's it's had a large transformation It'll be interesting to see how they retool that area. I mean spags as as good as it gets I don't know you got to make choices right and Offensively we needed some more firepower. They go out get Kenneth Walker So gonna have to have some young guy step up you're in line and uh, and you know off and spags we trust baby He's uh, he's unbelievable. I know Dave Merritt our db's coaches Unbelievably getting the guys going over there and like understanding the system He's been with him since he was in New York and he's been with spags since he was in New York So they're they're quite the duo and uh, we still got some guys in that room that can play some ball now um, I know uh, they're gonna have to step up but uh and become more of Every down corner, but um, I'm excited to see it happen man. One being no allowance. Well There's some other free agency news as well for the Eagles. We extended Jordan Davis three years 78 million including 65 million guaranteed. I thought this is an outstanding extension Jordan Davis really came on this last year. Yeah, he was very strong. He had a outstanding season was in the best shape of his career I'm just so happy for the fact that he's like a great fucking dude man He's an awesome dude, but he's matured so much He came in with this youthful just like he's a giant kid man and he still has that enthusiasm and Nature to him like he is a big kid, but now he's grown into it, right? And he's he's accountable He plays and practices hard. He does everything right and you always love whenever guys like that get rewarded. So Congratulations, Jordan Davis. That is life changing money quite literally unreal Eagles. We did lose unfortunately. Jalen Phillips to the panthers signed a four-year 120 million contract with 80 guarantee goddamn And then what? Dude, those numbers this year have been astronomical and free agency. So We're gonna talk about it a couple of times because there's some other crazy numbers I also want to bring up I think that there's a reason these numbers are getting to the level they are One because they're really good players, but I think people underestimate How much the salary cap is going to continue to go up in the NFL. Let's talk about we also lost One of the exciting whites. We are now down to the exciting white undefense Read blanket chip assigned with the Houston Texans find a three-year 24.75 million dollar deal. Congratulations to read Awesome teammate and was a big part of our success since he was with the Philadelphia Eagles for four years Congratulations, and here's some of these other numbers centers are getting fucking paid Chargers signed Tyler be at S three years 30 bills signed kind of a government to a four-year 52 million dollar deal But the big one everybody's talking about is Tyler Lindemalm three years 81 million This dude's making over 25 million a year at the center position I don't think people realize how fucking crazy high that is he's just jumped 10 million dollars the market was at what? 16 17. I think actually I think reads creed got up to 18 right so when I left the the year Yeah before creed signed his deal at 18. I was making the most on a per-year basis 15 at four. It was 14 and I I had, I had, I had upside to get to 15. I think we're a half glass full kind of family, Jason. There you go. There you go. Um, and even that was pretty high. And I think what is Creed reset the market at 18 and then Tyler Linnebaum and just one year has reset that by nine million dollars. And, um, one Tyler Linnebaum's incredible. He fits the scheme perfectly. Like they're going to run that KUBEX system down there. And in order to run that system, having a center that is really, really good makes outside zone systems go. Like you need that. Like you go back to the Denver Broncos with Mike Shanahan, you have Tom Nalen. Like if you have a guy at the pivot position that can reach a nose guard and get to the second level, it makes a big difference in that run game. But beside that, all of these numbers that have been released this year have been very high. And I think it's a clear indicator. The NFL salary cap is going to continue to go up. These teams are banking on the salary cap rising each and every year. They know the media contracts are being negotiated right now between the NFL and all of these media companies. And it's the biggest thing that any of these networks can afford. Over the past two years, it's gone up 40 mil just these past two years. Last year, I think it went up 30. This year went up 22. But what I'm saying is most of the money that dictates the salary cap are the media contracts. 100%. It's gone up 40 million. The last couple years or went up 40 million last year. What was it this year? You said 20 something. So yeah, last year was like 30 something this year's 22. Yeah. So it did that without redoing the media contracts. That's just in revenue going up across the lead. What's going to drastically change it is the NBA redid their media contracts a few years ago without the revenue really going up. Like the viewership and everything stayed stagnant. But these networks need sports to survive. So they spent huge on the NBA media contracts. I really do believe that this is NFL teams knowing these media contracts that they're coming and renegotiating right now are going to be astronomically higher than they are right now. I think we're going to start seeing absurd number. I mean, these are already crazy. My god, Duffy is getting 30 a year. You look four or five years down the line. It's you're going to start seeing close to I wouldn't be surprised by in the next 10 years. You see a quarterback getting like a billion dollar contract. I'm not messing with you. Because look at what Pat's side. Pat's side of $500 million deal, right? Basically, I think it was just under five. I think you're right. I think it was a little bit over five actually. Within 10 years, the media contracts are all going to double. Now, it's going to be a long term deal. This was a 10 year deal. Yeah. You're going to see quarterbacks making close to $100 million a year. I bet it is crazy what these media contracts have going to. The networks have to have the sport because NFL rules all of the viewership numbers. It's what all the marketers want. It's how these networks are surviving right now. They're going to get desperate to have this content. Fox, CBS, they're all freaking competing against each other. They know these numbers are going to be ridiculous in four or five years. And they're starting to try and renegotiate them early. So it might even happen earlier. I don't know, man. I think this is a clear sign as any that all of these teams know the Salar cap is going to be outrageous in four or five years. And that's all we got for this week in NFL free agency. It's been a new news, Jason. We got out of the house and hit TGL, man. Yeah, baby. Yeah. How fucking awesome was that? Well, yeah, you had quite a blast. You were there, what three days in a row, three days, Sunday, Monday, Tuesday. Yep. And to be honest, I'm not gonna lie. I thought it was fascinating. The stuff that you were doing where you were going underneath, you were showing the lockers with the players, have it their disposal out there. Also the technology that goes into all this stuff, the recovery, the workout rooms and everything. It is a fascinating environment over there. And that's exactly what they brought me over to do. I think a lot of times watching, you know, on TV, you don't realize the technological. And I'm telling you right now, I was blown away in person seeing that place in person. Like let alone, you don't understand what you're, what you're about to say, but seeing that place in person and being in the arena is a night and day difference of being in and watching it on TV. For sure. On TV, it doesn't, I mean, it looks good. But when you're there in person, you really get an accurate representation for the scale of it. I mean, it's the enormous facility that screen is gigantic. It's huge. The green is huge and it moves and changes. And the technology and, you know, the innovation put into that place is just state of the art. And I had an opportunity to go down there and show that off. And I've just, first of all, I was excited to see it because the whole golf world has been talking about this facility down there and so far. So I'm like, dude, I would love to go check it out and got the chance to see how the green works going underneath that. Got a chance to hit on the simulator and got a chance to watch some of the best golfers in the world. Hit in front of a grandstand full of people. I mean, I will buy that ticket every day of the week. Honestly, I will buy that ticket to see my guy, Minwoo, absolutely ripping the fucking ball. I got a nice little chipping lesson from Minwoo. Yeah, wouldn't he tell you because you actually look like you actually kind of took something out of that. Yeah. So I feel like when I'm chipping a lot of times, I try to like take my hands out of it as much as I can and just make it like a pendulum, almost like you're putting type thing. And he was like, dude, you're too, it's making you too stiff. You got to be more like you got to have a little bit of release. It's not like a full swing, but it's got to be more fluid. So he was giving me some great advice. I was like taking it on a hand and kind of swinging it. Then he was just kind of giving me to release the club still even when I'm chipping. And right away, you can see how much more feel when my hands aren't involved at all, it's hard for me to gauge the feel of hitting the ball. The moment for whatever reason when I start to incorporate my wrist just a little bit, I feel like I can gauge speed better chipping and really putting to like it's there's something about my hands being involved that I have a better feel. So it was great. I would love to take more lessons from your men. I don't know if you got time. I know you're busy winning all sorts of championships. Yeah, I think it's time to use top 10 over at Arnie's place this week release. There we go. Last I looked at was going to start putting some money down on men. And then Tom Kim hitting the whole and one to win in call the way back from a major deficit. My dog. Okay. And make the playoffs was pretty freaking epic. Dude, it was so fucking lit in that goddamn arena when he made that dude. It was so fun, man. Before we were getting ready to do that show that day, they're like, hey, Jason, we're thinking about putting you back up on the lift for those holes. And I'm like, dude, guys, I'm happy we did the lift thing, but honestly, it was terrifying. I don't want to go back up there. That was a one and done thing right there. And they said, okay, what if we do some fun bit? We're like, hey, you've had a long week. We're going to show off the cold tub. You get in the cold tub to ice down your legs and recover from the long week of TGL. I'm like, oh, yeah, it sounds good. So when that happened, I'm in the locker room in my bathing suit, I just hear the whole place he rupt and I'm like, dude, what just happened? And we pull it up on the like phone and we see that Kim hit a hole in one. And they're like, all right, we're about to cut to the cold plunge thing at the next break. I'm like, there's no way they're going to come in here. More odds to get cold. There's so much shit happening out there. Keep it on the guys. Keep it on the guys. Keep it on the guys. But the lead producer Jeff gave me a good ribbing. He's like, yeah, we, I bet you would have liked to have been in the lift when that happened as opposed to in the locker room. I'm like, yeah, you're probably right. It was an epic week. Got to, you know, talk to tiger woods. It was just, it was so cool. Being down there, talking with Homa and and men who max max was such a good dude. He was enjoying himself after that win. No doubt, no doubt. Um, so it was, it was a great week. And we got to play golf together. I got to see you, Travis. It was just, it was a very fun three days, especially in Florida out of the bitter snow that we had that week in Philadelphia. And so yeah, I'm saying it right now. We got to do a live event. We got to do it, dude. We got to do it. We got to do it. We have to, we, I, if they let us, I don't know what they let us around technology and and now I think we could fill it's, I think we could fill the seeds, man. I think it's, uh, it's such a cool atmosphere. I think there's a way we could, we could have some fun with it, bring it because everybody fucking golfs, man, it don't get me wrong. We're, we're no professionals, but yeah, but it's, it's, it's fun to compete, uh, and it's fun to fucking be on a live stage like that in such a unique atmosphere. And I think, uh, I think we could, we could put something together and get some things brewing, uh, just in the NFL world, let alone if we start crossing leagues and, and bring another guys into it. Well, I, I do gotta ask you, you, you saw my golf game, uh, for three days, basically, two days, are you getting nervous about our time? No. What? I thought it was playing pretty good. I thought it was pretty good. You are playing pretty good. That doesn't mean you're gonna get into positives. All right, Trif. You're not 30 strokes better than what you were. I don't need to be 30 strokes. You're right. He's not 30 strokes. I'm sorry. Yeah. You're not, you're not, you're not, not. If you break 80, you'll, you're gonna be in the positive. You, you think you're breaking 80? I think I'm gonna be able to break 80. Yeah. I do. All I gotta do is fix up the short game. I got it. You rid of the fucking butter, dude. You get rid of that. I might start shaking in my boots. You get rid of that butter. I'm doing it with that freaking peanut butter, whatever you want to call it. That bulls eye. You don't even know where to hit it on the club to hit it consistently. This I do. This I do. I just miss it sometimes. I know where to hit it. I just don't hit it where I'm trying to hit it sometimes. It's a small name swamish small type thing. It's a small sweet spot. It's gonna be fun. It's gonna be fun. There is no chance. You're breaking 80 with that putter. All right. Well, we shall see. I have never been more confident. Just let me put it. Let me say that. To be fair, breaking 81 day isn't going to get you into the positives. Yes, it is. Well, it will for a day. I mean, if you do it all three days, you'll be in the positive. But yeah, breaking 80 by that stable forward scoring will probably be in the positive. We'll be in the positive for sure. Because if you're breaking 80, you're only getting. No, no, no. I hear a handful of double bloke. But you got to do it three days in a row. Oh, that's a thing. Yeah, you would have to break 80 all three days to be in the positive. But you can do it without breaking 82 really if you break as long as you eliminate doubles, you can be in the positive fairly easily in the stable for two. I don't know, man, because a par is a point. Well, I guess. Yeah. And you know, he is evil is nothing. You really the doubles, the doubles are the drives, which I think you'll agree. My drive was on point this week. I got that thing figured out that blue shaft. I was up there fucking living it counts accounts. Yeah, it does. It definitely does. All right. Well, that does it for new news. Shout out to everybody at TGL for making that absolutely epic in shots. All the NFL teams making moves in the off season. Once again, new news brought to you by American Express shots at American Express. All right. Let's keep this thing moving before we get to Conan. Night Did Your Percenters. It's March. And you know what that means. We are officially running it back with the new Heights. Reese's March Manders bracket challenge. That's right. So we need all of you guys to enter and give your best bracket. Jason, have you been watching any any basketball? I have not as typical. I am knee deep and football stuff all for the most of the basketball season. So I just don't see a lot of college basketball. I would love to offer my expertise though on who to pick. So look for that, which is usually based on height. For asking. I might ask ask expert this year. I might not even I might just go completely off of somebody else's opinions. Okay. All right. I got somebody that I know that knows a lot about women's basketball. Oh, you know, not saying any names, not saying. Oh, you scared to tell us he's he's he's lying. Just don't put him on the spot. Don't burn the spot. All right. Well, I watched a quite a bit of men's basketball. And I know that Cincinnati is on the bubble right now. Come on, bear catch. We shall see. I know Miami, Ohio is undefeated. And that's about as far as I could tell Jason, if you're going to cheat and ask people for opinions. So, um, that's cheating. That's cheating. Yes, doing research is cheating. Yes. Do your own fucking research. Sight your fucking sources. If you're not going to fucking tell us your source. I'll tell you. I'll tell you. I'll tell you. I will. I will tell you my sources. Jake won the bracket. Joe Graham of the truth. Wait a second. Wait a second. Um, and, uh, yeah, Jake won it last year, but no chance he wins it this year. Zero men's and women's brackets open on selection Sunday March 15th. Next week, uh, we will make our final four picks and share the links to, um, participate in our bracket challenge. So this year, the winners will get a swag bag. Uh, with signed new heights, merch and Reese's cups. Oh, you think we ran out of gold cups. Jason, we can get some more. Well, they, I mean, they can make more of them get a gold cup. I think they at least got to get another gold cup. Yeah, we get more gold cups. Yeah, it's just more gold cups. I don't know. I still don't have a gold cup. So, yeah, why don't we get a few of those. All right. I will get you a gold cup. I love it. Can I get it embroidered? I'll pay for it right from the new heights account. Both of our names. Uh, yeah, we can definitely, we can do it. We can do that. We can get you a cup. We get the winner of this cup. Those cups are expensive. They do cost over $10,000. It is gold plated. It's a big deal. It's a big deal. And it's a fun thing to take to a party, uh, and, and Chuck Beers out of. So I've also used it as a casino chips cup. But your kids have seen that cup. It is a good luck. I have done very well to casino and my gold cup. There's no question. There you go. All right. Now, once again, thank you to our friends at Reese's for team enough for this March. Man is bracket challenge me the best 92% or win. Let's get to our conversation with Conan. Oh, Brian. Ladies and gentlemen. Thanks for representing sponsor Hills pet nutrition. Life moves fast. You're up early. You're grinding through the day. Handling million things at once. That's right. And through it all, your pet is right there. A constant calming presence in all the chaos. They give you so much without asking for anything in return. And you want to give back, especially when it comes to their health. Let's be honest with everything on your plate. Pat parents need solutions that actually work without adding more stress to your day. That's right. That's the beauty of Hills Hills science led nutrition helps you give more love than humanly possible. They're formulas are designed by experts. So you know you're giving your pet what they need to thrive even when life gets hectic because you're only human. There's hills. Find the right food at hills pet.com slash science does more. Thank you to our sponsor, American Express. The more we travel, the more we care about taking it slow. If there's nothing like a heaven time to take your time vacation mode is a real thing. And honestly, that feeling it should stay with you from the minute you start your trip to the minute you get back home. That's right. That's why veterans like us reach for the American Express platinum card. It's the card that moves you without any issues throughout your journey from the airport lounge to the world class hotel. Yes, being a platinum card member gets you access to the largest curated global hotel program as compared to other credit card programs with special benefits as of July 2025. Hotels that actually understand what it means to take your time and be taken care of you check in settle in and take things day by day your whole trip at your own pace just the way you want it. Now that's how you know you're doing it right with premium travel benefits and award winning service. There's nothing like American Express platinum terms apply learn more at American Express dot com slash with platinum. Oh, my God. We rolling. We're going. Guys meet six feet four inches. Yeah. 90 pounds of pure Irish magic. I wish I was there in person because I would physically intimidate you both. I like it. I wouldn't be able to take it. You just wouldn't be able to. It's too much. It's a lot of man right here talking to you guys, but. Ryan control yourselves. How are you both do a good dude. Absolutely fantastic man. Thank you for the times. Thanks for having me on. You're preparing for the Oscars. What is how much of that team overlaps with like what you do with team Coco and like late night like is it completely separate. No, there's a lot of overlap. A lot of these are writers that I've used before. They worked with me for years. I mean, I've been at this forever. I have all my favorite writers come in for this and we just get a room going. It's not probably unlike your world where it's all about preparation. Sure. So we get people together and we start a couple of months ago and we just start working and we have a room that goes all the time and I drop in and out of it. I usually just waste their time. I do all this bullshit. I got him laughing, but it's not in any way productive for the. You always got a vibe check. Exactly. That's what it is. It's a lot of vibe check. So that's just fun. That's that part is probably my favorite part. The two things I miss the most when I'm not working on a project like this or doing a late night show is the band and the writers. You're so in sync with the band specifically the drummer. I mean, the intros to the late night are some of my favorite like showman work of all time. I mean, the hips with the high hats. Yeah. Yeah. The the the the coat tails to the. Yes. Yes. Yes. The nipple nipple twisting. Yeah. You know, this was my version of an end zone dance. You know, like that was my. I always, you know, was thinking if I ever did somehow accidentally get thrown into a game and managed to catch a football in the end zone. It would be the string dance and then the nipples. And then I'd probably be. It probably the nipples would get me tossed. Probably. Nothing care allowed to do that. You probably get your little fine. Maybe at least 15 yards. All right. Well, you know, it's maybe worth it. Maybe worth it. It is. If you get in the end zone, you can do whatever you want. Exactly. We're going to talk more about this. We're going to do the intro real quick though. And because I know we got it in the show with the audience. Oscar Prep and everything. So whatever you guys want to do, whatever you want to do. Yeah, the man dude. Here we go. Hi there, guests today is a six foot four comedian writer and fellow podcaster out of Brookline, Massachusetts. He graduated Magnum. Come on out from a small state school just outside of Boston. He is a six time Emmy winner, winner of the 20, 25 mark trained prize and for humor. You might know from his time as the host of the hip podcast, Conan O'Brien needs a friend or as the host of the Emmy award winning travel series Conan O'Brien must go from his 16 year sting as a host of late night with Conan O'Brien. He is the man that gives the world comedy classic, such as Pim Bot, try if the insult comedy dog masturbating bear and Andy Richter and this Sunday he is back for his second time hosting the Academy Awards. 90% is pleased welcome. That's the largest Irishman I know now. Conan O'Brien. My God, I've been waiting for that intro. Hey, Jason, are you available to do my intro for the Oscars? Are you well? Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, be careful what you throw out there, Conan. If you did that, first of all, it would be way too long. The Oscar people would be snow-passed. The band's playing. Kelsey Nation would be going crazy. Fuck you, Alfred. I'll be tuning in to the Oscars for the first time. Hey, absolute honor to be here and I do want to stress. If you saw me in person, I'd have nothing but mad respect from both of you because I am a physical, I am a specimen. I'm a physical specimen. And a lot of people don't know that because I act like such a fool. The hair is a golden red right now. The top piece is looking fantastic, dude. Isn't that beautiful? I have so many wigs for every occasion. [LAUGHTER] Don't you envy my wife. She sees this orange sherbert lying on the pillow next to her. It goes real. And also, everyone here in my world, Team Coco, so excited that I'm doing this, that I've got fans sitting in right now at huge chiefs fans, Tunisian buddy, just jump over here. Can you see that? Let me jump over here. Come on over here. I mean, he's magnetic and get in here. Get in close right around me. There they are. Oh, check out the jersey. All they do is talk about the damn chiefs. And by the way, no offense. I'm a Patriots guy born and raised. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Had a feeling. Had a nail nailing. Yeah, sorry about that. Not a terrible situation to be in as a Patriots fan. Not a terrible situation to be in. And then, you know, I wanted to get some Eagles fans in here, but they're too violent. They're just-- [LAUGHTER] You got to go down to the courthouse to find some of those. Yeah, yeah, yeah. If we had Eagles fans in here, they would be tearing out the equipment and throwing it at me. I'm terrified of an Eagles fan. Much respect, but they frightened me. They're so intense. But guys, it's a huge treat. I appreciate it. The treat is all ours. I mean, I can't tell you how much we watch you all growing up. And we've followed-- I mean, I was-- I played hockey growing up. And we would go and have sleepovers when we were younger. And we're like, I mean, middle school at this time. And we would stay up play video games and purposely stay up just to watch late night with Conan O'Brien. Every time. And see the walk of Texas Ranger Lever. Well, the walk of Texas Ranger Lever was one of my favorite things ever. I've heard it. I was ever. And it's one of the things I'm most happy about. And then they made us stop doing it, because they said that we're playing all these clips. And there's actors in those clips. And they said to me, you know, the actors are starting to notice you're playing these clips, and you're not paying them. And they're going to come after you. [BUZZER] And I went into a depression because of my favorite thing. And then I said to my producer, I want it to end to my lawyer. I want to take this to trial. And they're like, what are you talking about? And I said, I want to show these-- these actors are going to go crazy. And I said, no, I want to go to trial and show the clips and then say, ladies and gentlemen of the jury, that is not acting. [LAUGHTER] And they said, you are not going to do that. And it's not happening. Shut up. So that had to go away. But you wouldn't want it right there. This is before internet. So I didn't know when the show first started, all we had was like reviews to go off of. And the reviews were written by people my age or older. And they didn't understand. They just didn't like what I was doing. And no one told me that, no, there's all these 14-year-olds out there who are staying up and watching it. And they're building a religion around it. And so I always wish, well, why couldn't Travis and Jason have got a hold of me back then and said, hey, man. [LAUGHTER] There was no way. And now I meet all these comics who are huge stars now. Or like, oh, no, I grew up watching your stuff. And I thought, well, we didn't know. No one told us. You didn't have any ideas, though. It was a kind of a rough start, no? Like the first episode. You came in with high expectations off of SNL. And like everybody was like, man, Conan O'Brien is hilarious. He's going to kill it. And the only reason I know this is because I tried my hand at a late night show this year. One of the hardest things I ever done. But I had-- You had a bunch of my writers. All of them. They were all former late night with Conan O'Brien, John Glaser, Tammy Sager, Andy Blitz, and Kevin Dorf. All those-- They were all right on the show. It was so hard and daunting. And they knew what a fan I was of your stuff. And they said, it wasn't easy for Conan when he just got selling. It took him a while to really get into it and everything. So I don't know. I don't know why I'm bringing this up now. But yeah, go ahead. It's like anything else where, again, I think there are probably some analogies to your guys' profession where you come up. You think about comedy all the time. You're obsessed with it. And then finally, you get your show. But I was 29 when I auditioned. I had never done anything on television. And so it's one of those situations where I was thrown in as a rookie. And I'm just getting sacked left and right. It's kind of a disaster. We were doing the kind of comedy that I wanted to do, which was very strange and stuff that I really believed in, and that my head writer, Robert Smigel, really believed in. So we knew we were doing what we wanted to do. But I had to learn a lot. I had to kind of learn how to, in your world, you'll be like, see the field and figure out how it all comes together and gels. And the only situation was you're just out there alone. You're one of just a few late-night hosts. This is back when there weren't any. And I mean, there were very few. And so there's a lot of focus. There's an incredible amount of focus. So yeah, we barely survived that first year and a half, two years. I always thought I was going to get canceled. But then it started to gel. And then it started to click. But I think I started in September of '93. And I don't think it really started to click with Americans until like '96. It makes sense to looking back at it, though, because a lot of this stuff ended up you're building like this atmosphere within the show, right? There's so many pieces and characters and bits and things that take time to really take foot for fans watching. But once they're in, it's like, this stuff is gold, man. It is hilarious. And the fans love it. And I feel more, and maybe I'm wrong on this. But it feels like you, almost more than any of the other late-night show hosts, there's like a level of fandom that is to a die hard nature. Like people absolutely love Conan O'Brien with like an infatuation. He's so spot on. And I've always actually wondered why haven't you done more acting? Oh, well, I've always-- I've always, in my mind, like, man, he's so good. He could do all of it. He's got the full gaming. But I feel like you haven't like-- I don't know. Am I off on that? No, no, you're not off. You're off about a lot of things. But if I am, I am off. This is, you know, I mean, Travis. So you're so off on just about everything. And I'm getting this from Jason. But he's got a lot of complaints. No, you're absolutely right. Here's the problem. I just love what I do so much that the idea of me being in like a buddy comp movie-- if it's comedy, I would be excited to do it. And I did a serious acting role this year with Rose Byrne for this movie, if I had Lakeside Kiki, which did really-- she's nominated for an Oscar. And that was exciting to try. But I don't think I have it in me to be in a real acting scene, meaning if I was in a scene and my job was to tell a woman how much I loved her and then start crying, I would just be doing bits the whole time in jokes and they'd fire me right away. You know, like I couldn't-- You know what I mean? If my job was-- I loved you. I love you so much. I think I would-- I mean, people in the audiences would just be laughing. And then I'd probably look at the camera and go, - Whoa, what do you want from me, you know? - So, no, that makes all the sense in the world. - She's grieving about her father just dying in you. - And I'm like, who get another father? What's his behavior? Father's doing dime a dozen, you know? (laughing) - I'd lose some stupid bit, I'd ruin it. Guys, it's for the best, it's for the best. But I stay out of acting. - You're not staying out of the acting world. You are hosting the Oscars for your second time coming up this Sunday. - Guys, I need you, I will fly you in. You guys have to be backstage with me, getting me psyched up just before I go out. If you did that, I'd go running out there with way too much energy. (laughing) And they'd have shots of like Timothy Chalamet and, you know, these like famous actors Brad Pitt. - I mean, what is wrong with him? (laughing) - We're gonna kill it. - We're gonna shoot it up and spit it out! - We're gonna fucking kill him. - Yeah, and then doctors would rush in and carry me away. - That's right, travel, we'll give him some pre-workout drinks, some smell insults, creatine. You're gonna be juiced in a gills, Conan. - You give him all that, we're gonna need to give him a helmet too. All those things, you need to put a helmet on if you're gonna do that, that can cause you to get crazy. - If we did this, I would totally, the Oscars would be a disaster. And afterwards, work would get out. People would be going like, what happened? He did it last year and it was good, what happened? Well, do we mention that Travis and Jason Kills, we're backstage with him. They gave him some stuff to drink. They gave my helmet and they yelled at him. That might have had something to do with it. (laughing) - Then Conan went over and speared the trombonist. It was crazy. (laughing) - Yeah, just take him out, just take him out. - Yeah. - Electric, give the people what they want to see, man. - Sure, you got it, you got it. - Well, have you seen most of the movies that are up for awards? When you're hosting, do you make a point to try and watch all of them? - Yeah, I really do try to see 'em all. And this was a great year. I mean, this was a year where there's big stars in the films. There's a lot of great movies. There's, you know, box office hits. I mean, movies that did really well. So I watched them all and I thought, this is a great crop of movies. So it's a good year to host. I was excited about it. - You had a Kendrick Lamar joke last year that you bet one of your writers on that whether it was gonna work out or not. - Oh no, I didn't bet. And my producer did. My, one of my writers wrote a joke. And I think it was, I'm trying to think of what it was. It was like, well, we're halfway through the show. And Kendrick Lamar had, he had just done the Super Bowl half-time show. And who was he feuding with? - Drake. - Drake. - That's right, it was Drake. And so, you know, these feuds, I try and keep up with them. (laughing) - Bradby. - The rap beat. - Yeah, I said, hey, we're halfway through the show, which means it's time for Kendrick Lamar to call Drake a pedophile. And it destroyed. It destroyed. And people went crazy for it. But just before I went out, my producer Jeff Ross was like, that joke's gonna bomb. No one's gonna get it. And I'm like, are you kidding me? And so he bet the writer of the joke. And as I walk backstage, I see my producer handing him like $100. (laughing) - Better than I thought, yeah. But I was never endowed about that one. - Are there any jokes you're worried about this year? How does, how do you go sussing out which ones make it and which ones don't? - Probably one of the best things to do, which I've been doing now for about two months is I go to clubs and I show up as a surprise. And I go to far-flung clubs, like really clubs that are way out there. - Jason, could you imagine just sitting there and Conan walks out? What? That means taking a surprise. - That's so cool. - It's fun and you go to these places where, I mean, sometimes it literally is like a little comedy club in the back of a bowling alley in Covina. And there's no, like the bathroom door is busted, so they say just use the alley. So, I was in an alley in Covina, pissing up against a wall before I did my set. And I thought, I'm mostly in the Oscars in like five weeks. And I'm pissing in an alley in Covina. And I just thought like, this is amazing. I love this. - This is what it takes to be the best. - Yeah, you've got to go urinate in an alley. - In an alley. - I'll be probably doing that just before the Oscars, minutes before I'll see. Do you guys have an alley? - What are you talking about? - I'm superstitious. - Yeah, I'm superstitious. I need an alley right now. And I need nine quarts of water. (laughing) You go out and you try jokes out and over time you get a sense of these ones seem to consistently do well. This one doesn't seem to land right. And it's just a lot of, again, something you guys can relate to prep. I mean, a lot of things in life are put in the work and do the prep. I'm a big believer. I always thought how much talent I have isn't my business. I don't even know, it's very hard to know like am I more talented than that person or less talented than that person. I always thought I can't control that. That's a mystical thing that you can never really know. What I can control is prep. I can control prep and I can control hard work. And be honest with yourself. When it didn't go right, don't tell yourself it went great, be honest with yourself. So those are the principles that I probably think apply to not just your profession, my profession, but you can apply that anywhere. - There you are. - I was the one that I can't control. And if you do the prep, then you, if the plan doesn't go right, then you improvise, but you have a freedom. Well, at least I did the prep. So now I feel free to, okay, this didn't unfold the way I wanted it to and this prop just broke or something just went wrong in front of everybody, but now I can make something up, I can scramble. And I think that, again, same principles in my business is your business, it's the same thing. - Yeah, you're 100% right. So I think two of the things you have touched on are like monitors that we use our whole career, like the control which you control is something that is so important in athletics and really everything, right? So many people get wound up in their head thinking about what ifs and things that are outside what they have control of and it's like, hey, if you just focus on these things, this is actually what's gonna allow you to be successful. To me, I felt like whenever I practice and really put the time in, I just felt confident and you're not as nervous, you don't worry as much. You're just kinda out there doing what you just did all week preparing for. And it does free you up and try new things out. You're going to the clubs, we would try things out in practice. I go out there and I'm gonna try this technique out today. Oh, I just got my ass kicked, okay? Let's throw that one away, we're not gonna try that one again. - Well, I got my answer, yeah, that's great. And there's also a thing that I think about a lot is muscle memory and you think you can apply that to anything. You can apply muscle memory obviously to athletics, which is just thousands and thousands of thousands of reps. So you're not thinking when you catch the ball, you're not thinking when you're centering up. You're not thinking about any of that stuff because it's the muscle memory. It's the same thing that happens in comedy and it's the same thing that happens, I'm sure in every other profession where you have that and that can take over so you don't have to waste any brainpower thinking about that and it frees up space to take advantage of, oh wait, this weird thing just happened. I'm gonna go left, I'm gonna go right, it's all the same thing. - Traveling to call that black and out. He's talked about that numerous times. - Yeah, black and out, but you do the work so that you have those natural instincts ready in your back pocket to play, you know what I mean? - Yeah, I think it's so fascinating. We all have the different, like you were talking about the work you put in, the prep you put in, we all have that different world that is our prep and I think that's where you really make it unique and you make it you and to hear that you're going to these kind of one-off small town comedy spots. That is so cool to know that you use those to be on literally the biggest stage that anybody could ever be on. - Yeah, the other thing that's great about it is, I get a lot of energy from being around, I mean sometimes these are, you know, people in their 20s are hanging out, trying out their sets there and they have, it's tough to make a living and stand up right now because the business structure of it all has changed. So a lot of these people that I'm hanging out with before I go up or after I go up have two other jobs and you see that I like anything that reminds me that the scale of things can change, you know. You can, you can, you can be in the Super Bowl or you can be hosting the Oscars, but fundamentally it's not different from you playing in the street in front of your house. There is something that the two are connected and to act like there's not a connection between the two, - I think so. is silly because there is. There's a real fundamental connection and I think sometimes people forget they think, well, you know, Super Bowl, that's just going to be a whole new thing and you think, well, actually fundamentally, it's the same thing. We've added all these layers of, you know, money and, you know, prestige and commercials and, you know, there's going to be rockets firing in the air and there's a huge halftime, but fundamentally, it's the same thing and that's what I think about is when I go out there in a couple of days, it's going to be the same thing that I've been trying to do in one way or another since I was 14 years old. It's really not that different. It's just now I've got makeup, like a really nice touch, you know, you might be time for that. We'll see, you know, but yeah, you said you're trying some of these jokes out in these comedy clubs. I'm too superstitious. Fair enough, fair enough. I absolutely will not and I, and I don't trust you. I don't trust you. That's fair. That is very fair. You guys are, you have a great reputation. You know, you're a wholesome Ohio boys, but I don't, I think you're going to leak these. You're going to fuck me over and you're going to, you're going to laugh and then you're going to high five each other. That's what's going to happen. That's right. That's right. You see right through us, Conan. All right, last officer's question. Will the dude in sandstorm be making another appearance? You know, I got to change it up and this culture move so quickly that the thing that you could joke about last year, you know, this year if I made a dune joke, people would be like, what's dune? I mean, everyone has such short attention spans now that they're thinking about these movies that we're talking about tonight. And if I talk about something that happened six weeks ago, they don't know what I'm talking about. So, yeah, we know. Let's move on to something we've really been wanting to ask you since we've found out that we were going to have the pleasure of having you in front of us kind of already touched a little bit on this. But as someone that's done 4,380 episodes of late night TV and now a fellow podcaster, what is what's the golden nugget to becoming a better interviewer? Okay. I do have a strong opinion about this, which is it's not a good one, but it's a strong opinion. No, I think that you can do kind of a Jedi mind trick on yourself. And I do this. If you're talk, if you're interviewing a lot of people and over the years of the interview, like three people a night, five nights a week, you know, 48, 46 weeks a year. I mean, it's just a total grind. And there'd be people that would come on the show that I to be honest with you because you're doing such a volume business, I wasn't naturally that interested in that person. That would happen. It just there's no way around it. And what I would do is I would spend some time thinking about that person and try to find the thing about either themselves or what they do that was interesting to me. And if you think about it, you can always find that thing. So you could at first glance have a guest and you're thinking, you know, we're talking to, you know, this guy is the, was this former treasury secretary? Why do I want to talk to the former treasury secretary? And then, uh, but then if you look at it, you find out, oh, uh, he's, he loves restoring 1967 Chrysler's. And then you're like, oh, that's kind of cool. Or he, uh, he likes Taekwondo. Wait a minute. That's interesting. If you think about someone and read a little bit about them, you'll find things that's your way into that person. And I think humans listening to any interview podcast late night, they can tell when you were really interested. And so all it is is finding what's the thing that interests you about that person. And the second part is listening. Because believe it or not, there are a lot of interviewers out there who don't listen. They just, they have their question they want to ask, but they're not really listening. And if you're listening, you'll hear the person say something like, you know, there was that summer that I worked in a, you know, coal mine. And you'd be like, wait a minute. What? You worked in a coal mine. What's that all about? And if you're not listening, you let the you breeze right past that and you, you know, you lose this golden thing. So those are the tricks. Yeah. I mean, that makes all the sense in the world. By the way, I hear kids in the background. I hear children. That's mine. Yeah. I do this in my basement. No, no, that's. Big production. Big production. If you want, uh, Jason, I will totally scream at them for you. I mean, guy, which one, which, which, which one's making noise? The, which one's making noise? Conan wants to scream at them. I'm getting a nose for my wife. I'm getting it. Yeah. That's okay. I respect her. I respect her for that. No, you know what? It's for the best because your children would be, uh, scarred for life that say, why did that orange-haired woman yell at us? And that lady was so mean. Thank you to our sponsor, Allstate. Checking Allstate first could save you hundreds on car insurance. That's smart. Not checking, uh, the clocks are reset after daylight savings time. Rookie moved to be fair. I was only late because I have no idea what time zone I'm in. That's why checking is smart. So check Allstate first for a quote that could save you hundreds. You're in good hands with Allstate. Potential savings vary subject to terms, conditions and availability Allstate North American insurance company and affiliates Northbrook, Illinois. Thank you to our partner, liquid IV spring is here and, uh, you know what that means, spring break travel. Who doesn't love a good spring break travel? We oftentimes would find ourselves growing up going down to Florida where our grandmother lived, our uncle lived on Marco Island and then we'd try and time it up in a little Disney World action. It was the highlight growing up as a kid. Um, and then I got into high school and we would go every spring break to tour as a jazz ensemble where I forgot to mention to Conan O'Brien that I actually played at Brookline high school. I competed in jazz against his alma mater. Anyways, uh, spring break is perhaps the best time of year for kids and adults who have kids because you get to enjoy some incredible family memories. Alrighty as travel vets, we know how important staying hydrated is on the go, whether you're jet setting to escape somewhere warm for a few days or taking the kids to go see the family long travel days, take a toll on your body and especially your hydration. That's why liquid IV is a must have and you carry on bag, just tear one open, pour it into your water bottle and you're good to go with an optimized ratio of electrolytes essential vitamins and clinically tested nutrients. Liquid IV turns ordinary water into extraordinary hydration that helps you rehydrate more than water alone. Plus, there's tons of hydration multiplier flavors that choose from like cotton candy, popsicle, firecracker or my favorite peanut colliding or you can try sugar free options with flavors like white peach, lemon lime, rainbow, sherbert and more wherever you're heading this spring, travel with on the go hydration from liquid IV, tear, pour, live more head to liquidIV.com and get 20% off your first order with the code. New heights at checkout. That interview vice is great because I it is often that you find yourself like you're you get caught in the questions and you're not listening and that's what it's like. It doesn't feel like a conversation. It doesn't feel like it's going anywhere. The other thing we find that we're often doing is we're just doing like a bit of that Chris Farley SNL thing. Do you remember? That was great, right? Yes, man, I love that sketch. I love when he would do that. You guys are huge Farley fans. Is that correct? Oh man. Yeah. So I was there the day he came in for his interview to he had to go talk to Lauren Michaels about you know before you get hired you have to have this one last interview with Lauren Michaels and Lauren had this office that was right above the studio. We would all write up on the 17th floor, but then the studio is on the 8th floor and on the 9th floor there's this small office that Lauren had and he would you know he'd make people wait a long time that I kept noticing this guy sitting you know it was a real young Chris Farley and he was sitting on this couch wearing like a blue blazer and a tie and he's being so Chris he was just waiting for his big shot to talk to Lauren and I'm a writer there and I noticed after a while like this poor guy's been waiting a long time and someone said oh that's that's Chris he's probably going to be a cast by everybody has to have his interview with Lauren. So I told Chris let's take a walk buddy I'm Cone and he's like oh hey how are you oh you know you know bowing and like oh oh and I'm like hey let's take a walk I'll show you around so I walked him around the studio on 8. And I was doing this bit where if a guy was raising a boom mic, I would shout out like I was in charge of him. And I would shout out like I was the boss. But if he was already raising the boom mic, I'd be like, "Get that boom mic up, let's go! Get that boom mic up!" (laughing) And his name wasn't even Charlie. I didn't even know his name. I'd be like, "Come on Charlie, hire the boom mic." And Chris was laughing and then Chris started doing it. And so we walked around just doing this bit for about 20 minutes, shouting at people to do the thing they were already doing. And then he ends up having his interview with Lauren, which obviously went well. And then he was just such, he was that guy. He would always meet people in comedy who were kind of serious when they're not doing it. And then they turned it on. And I've always really related to the people that do it 24/7. And that was Chris. I mean, Chris, you'd see him in the hallway and you could pretend to hit him in the stomach and he would double over and then he'd go into a character. And it was that all the time. It was really joyous. - You just fed that to my bow, to my heart and my bones. We love Farley, man. We grew up on that. And I can only imagine how amazing it was to actually be around the guy, even off camera and everything. - Yeah, yeah. - When it makes sense that you two would click right away 'cause I feel like both of you were very physical comedians, right? There was a lot of body motion and physicality to the humor. I guess that probably does lend itself to like, if you're like that, you're probably like that off air as well. It's probably hard to turn that on. I would assume. - I'm one of six kids and I grew up in environment. And we were all born practically within months of each other. We defied science. It's the Irish Catholic way. - Irish six templates. - Yeah, exactly. And so there was a lot of physicality just growing up. I mean, I have, we have dogs and cats and I just see them on the floor rolling around. They're playing, but if you didn't know any better, it looks like they're fighting, but they're not. They're playing. They're like soft mouth, but they're like kind of biting each other and cuffing each other and rolling around on the floor and making noise. And that's how I grew up. And I'm very much still that way. I like to be, for better or worse, very physical around people. And I'm constantly, now that I'm no spring chicken, but for years, I would immediately want to do any bit that involves me jumping through something. You know, like a big class or taking a fall or making a leap, I just love that stuff. And now I'm 62 years old and I still like doing that stuff. And so I'll come up with an idea where I do that and the people, the professionals will say, well, no, we're gonna have to get a stunt guy. And I lose it. I say, no, the only reason I want to do this is I want to jump through the window. I want to get tackled. I want, you know, that's the stuff. I want to go through this table. Yeah, I want to go through this table. And, you know, I'll figure out the rest later, meaning if something breaks, we'll figure it out. You know, but that is very much the kind of thing I've always liked a lot. And so I don't seem to be adjusting for age. And that's probably gonna go very badly at some point, but no, no, not if you just keep living young, you're good. Okay, so the doctors are wrong. (laughing) We'll get you some torridol, you'll be fine. You'll be getting itself precautionary. Jason, what is it called? Torridol, it was a big, they used to inject it and then there was a lawsuit. Well, you can still get the injection. So you're saying that I qualify for an injection of a drug that. You're gonna go back to your forties. We would be honored to host you to Bill's Mafia, Buffalo, New York. We're gonna inject you with some torridol and we're gonna send you through a flaming table. I think you'd be very excited for this. Guys, I'm not kidding. I will promise you this right now on the air. I will meet you anywhere, anytime. I want a professional doctor to inject me with torridol. And then I will come through something. I promise you, this is not a bit. I'm here on record. I think that would be so much fun. Let's go. Yeah, and then my wife will take all of us to court. Me included. (laughing) That would be so much fun to do that though. I mean, I'm giddy just thinking about it. This is going to happen. It's going to happen. We're gonna shoot it. We're gonna be video. It's gonna go viral. And then you guys can come visit me in the hospital. I'm just gonna say the chiefs do play in Buffalo next year. (laughing) We know we're on borrowed time here. We're gonna do our last segment. We gotta ask, all right? Are you kidding? I will spend the week with you. I would rather do this than any of the hospital stuff. (laughing) Seriously? Don't send me back into the room with this. This is the most fun I've had in a while. And I'm going, let's go. It's just joyous, though. I am very happy. Of all the guests you've had on late night, where the pod, who is your favorite? There are different kinds of guests that are great in different ways. But I think a guy who was a true artist was a Norma McDonald. - There it is. - There it is. We had a little $50 bet going on ourselves. It was gonna be Norma now. - Absolutely. - And look. - And if I mentioned Norma, I've got to say, there's also, I mean, Will Ferrell when he would come on completely in character. And, you know, as a leprechaun and a fong. I mean, so it's not that there's one winner, but the reason I mentioned Norm is that nobody did what he did and no one ever can again. I do think he was uniquely able. He would come out and just tell these stories that were total bullshit. And you knew from the get-go. It was total bullshit. And he'd be like, you know, I'd say Norma, how's it going? I'd say I'm a pretty good gun. And I, you know, I'm a, I got a farm. And I'd be thinking, he doesn't have a fucking farm, but I'd go, you know, 'cause you're the interviewer. I'd be like, oh, you have a fucking duty. I got a farm and I got three daughters, Conan. And I'd be thinking, what? And I'd go like three daughters. Yeah, yeah, each one, each one prettier than the next. And one day, a traveling salesman. Yeah, yeah, a traveling salesman. And you'd think, oh, he's just telling a joke from 1942. And he's pretending this really happened to him. And it's performance art. I'm telling you, when I walk around in the world, people, people like come out of the woodwork and say, oh my God, Norma McDonald, this time he was on, that time he was on, this other time he was on. And I just think that there's, I think people are going to be talking about that guy 50 years from now, you know? I mean, he, he-- Another percent. And he, and, you know, and the way he told jokes, and he was completely fearless. That's the thing. He was always so smooth, man. Did you ever have an underrated guest? Like, so like a sneaky guest that was kind of your favorite, nobody would-- I mean, there's so many different guests that would come on and defy the label, you know? And there are people that can come on where, you know, they're known for being, you know, incredibly good-looking, and, or you think, oh, this person's going to be this type. I shot something once with Tom Cruise and London where we're driving around together. He was so great, comedically, and naturally funny. And I have to admit, I had put him in a little bit of a box that, well, he's an action star, guys. So he probably doesn't, you know, he won't be like the funniest person. And he was. He was really great, and he played it perfectly, and he had really good ideas. And I thought, well, that's on me. I put him in a box. I thought, you know, he's great at hanging onto the wing of a plane and delivering like a great action line. But there's no way he can-- I mean, I'm not expecting him to be funny in this way. And he was that-- 100% of that. That and more. And I'm sure you guys have experienced this doing the podcast, which is you'll talk to someone and you think, well, this, you know, OK, they're going to be really fascinating, but they're not going to be x, y, or z. And then they are 1,000 times over. So we all make-- we all form biases. We all form like, OK, I'm going to talk to these guys. And this is what we're going to talk about. And no, you're completely wrong. There's people will surprise you every time. I share that same story. Ironically, in London with Tom Cruise, he just-- he was one of the funniest down the earth guys. And it's just-- you just don't think to put him-- and really, you don't ever want to put anybody in a bubble. But it's just like, you don't think of it as that. And he really did. He really was just the best guy. Do you have like a favorite joke of all time? Oh, man. No, there's two men. There've been too many. I don't think there could be one joke that I would say is my-- you know, I have bits I've done that I really love. I once-- And you know, we found out that there was a league that played baseball and they played with 18, 1875 rules, like literally the same-- This is one of my favorite bits I've ever seen. They dressed like it was 1875 and they called the ball the apple, which is something that they really did in 1875, did like, you know, pitch the apple and they talked in that. So I showed up and I got into this insane costume and a fake, like, handlebar mustache. And I just became one of those guys. I literally became one of those guys and I was such an asshole and I was taunting the pitcher and saying, "Hurly apple, purly apple!" And making like weird jokes that would have been from the 1870s and the guy got irritated. So he whiffed one really close to my head and I ducked and then I dropped the bat and I come after him and I started putting my fist up. The only way somebody fights with a handlebar mustache. When I do fight both of you in a parking lot, which will happen because I'll be whacked out on Toradol, but it will be this style and I'll get a few pops in before you rip my torso into two pieces and candy comes out. I love those moments. There are moments where I don't even know I'm doing comedy and you guys talk about it too. It's when you said, "It's the blackout moments." Those are the moments that are the ultimate high for me is when you're doing your thing and it feels easy and you're not even thinking about it and then it's over and people say, "Oh, that was great." And you go, "I don't even know what happened." That's what I live for. This isn't in the runabout. I do want to ask you this because I'm always fascinated with people that are writers and also just naturally and inherently funny and you can just go like you're talking about. Blackout, they just kind of are riffing. In football, it's very easy like, "Hey, if you practice running routes versus specific coverage, you know where the open space is, you know structurally what is." Is there a structure that you hone or practice in the world of comedy that makes you able to riff and kind of just be like that all the time? I don't think I've ever seen them written out, but there are certain structures that get passed on from time to time and you mostly learn it through. You grow up and you look at what's making me laugh, like, you know, I would, I took from everything. I mean, I learned from, you know, really funny movies, like the Clueso movies with Peter Your Sellers, but also, you know, Warner Bros. cartoons and also, you know, TV shows I really loved and you'd pick up on different funny people you'd see on Johnny Carson and you'd notice a certain rhythm and it just kind of gets into your bones. And so it's not so much like there's a textbook anywhere. I'd be very suspicious of any book that said, "Make sure the joke always hits on the three. Make sure of it." Like, I would be suspicious of that, but I do think you pick up on things and then just through trial and error. And I mean, not even in front of people, but so much trial and error happens in comedy anyway happens. First, when you're a kid around your parents and your brothers and sisters, then in school, then it happens just out in life. You're constantly seeing and adjusting and learning on some level, but there's no book. No one can write it out in chalk on a board and with X's and O's and then you cut left or cut right. But it's one of those things that you learn just by doing over and over and over again. It kind of just sinks in to your bones. I think that is, because I don't, you know, the minute someone presents me with a structure, I would be, it would bum me out, you know. I think you always want to be able to surprise yourself in a moment. Man, you're giving us all types of nuggets of golds here, man. And it makes sense because I think comedy so much is about doing insane, the unexpected. So the moment you try to put structure to it, like it's like, okay, you're taking away the part that kind of makes it funny is by setting something up and then varying in a direction that nobody anticipates your going in. And every people try and analyze comedy, I think it just disappears, like it suddenly turns into a conversation because you're trying to grab smoke, you know, and you're like, I've got the smoke, but then you open your hand and it's not there, but I mean, that's kind of how it feels. It's just there's so many things that are mysterious to me and I kind of never want to know how they work. People, you've got another stage you're hidden this year and it's in a commencement speech at Harvard. Yeah. How do you feel about that? How did that come about? I get a lot of energy and inspiration from young people. So that's the thing that's exciting to me about it is I, I always feel like I'm a little bit like a vampire in that I like being around young people that are optimistic because it's really easy to get cynical or to start, you know, feeling like you've seen it all and what, you know, you can just enter a phase of your life where it's easy to go down that road and to me the antidote is be around young people. And a lot of times you talk to them and you think, oh, wow, these people are really smart. They seem to get it. They've got a lot of energy. I think we're in good shape going forward. You know, it's easy. People get very, you know, dour about the future, especially adults and older adults. And when you're around younger people, you can kind of feel like the world is in good hands. Oh, yeah. You've been best, but you've been blessed with great length, Conan. You're six foot four. We've talked about your imposing physical stature. Have you ever attempted to dunk a basketball? Yes. Yes, I have. How did it go? Well, the ensuing surgeries took six years. There was a total reconstruction of my, my, my arms had to be completely built from the band up. Oh, no. Well, your arms look great. I was one of those late bloomers, so it's like late high school. I start to shoot up. And I'm still growing. I think when I go to college, and I'm six four, and people would see me and go, wow, you must, you must be a great, people are always throwing me a basketball and saying, let's go. You know, but you're amazing. And I would have to explain to them that height is one of the things that helps in basketball. There are some other ones, natural ability, coordination, caring, caring about where the ball is. Focus. And when I would play basketball, which I liked to do, and I would always do bits the whole time I was playing basketball, and when I'd play stick ball, too, we would go, there was a place that had a wall and we spray painted like a, you know, rectangle on it for the strike zone and you'd use a, you'd use a really thin bat and tennis balls. And I would always announce who my character was and explain my character before I got up to, to the plate. And there'd be, I mean, there'd be people that were laughing and there'd be other people that were like, Jesus Christ, what are we, and I'd be like, okay, this next guy just got out of prison. He went, this is a real guy. I had a character whose name was Nikki Fiss, who was the most hated man in baseball. And I'd say now Nikki Fiss is up at the plate. He just got out of prison. He did two years from manslaughter because in a rage, he threw his bat into the stands killing an old woman. Fans hate him. You know, he's been banned from the sport, but he's back tonight. Nikki Fiss and it could be like, can't you just play the game? This is the game. Thank you. This is a much more important game. That's the game I was obsessed with. And Bob Odenkirk and I lived in Chicago and we did a comedy show there once, years and years ago when we were in our early 20s. And he and I would go to shoot baskets and I would pull my shirt up and put it over my face so that you couldn't, I couldn't see and I had my shirt over my face. And I would say, I'm the phantom, a guy who magically shows up at a basketball court. And I'm the phantom and then I would try to play with my shirt over my face. And of course, Bob would go into a phantom. Maybe if you took the mask off, no one can know my identity. People would pass this in Chicago on the north side. People would pass this idiot with his shirt. And I'd be I'd be missing not just the rim, but I would be missing. I wouldn't even, I mean, I'd just be throwing the ball up into the street because I can't see, but that was more interesting to me than actually trying to get the ball in the hoop. That's fucking good, man. If I played for like the Eagles or the Chiefs for one day, the coaches would have blood coming out their ear because they'd say, all right, guys, let's go. We're going to run this formation. I'd say, hold on, hold on. My name is Giuseppe Eldardo and I'm from Italy and God. What the hell? What's he doing? You know, it's fucking gold. Oh, man, to be honest, though, that's, you need some of that in every, in every like building, every workplace. Like you need that ability to just be, let everybody be themselves. And as long you're being productive, but I, I, I would have fucking died to be a part of any of those fucking games. Keep it in mind, because I know, you know, you just signed up again, Travis. So yeah, baby, I'll come into the locker room. If you guys are getting your asses kicked, I'll come into the locker room, you know, at half time. And I'll, I'll, you know, I'll be a character. Boy, will people get pissed? You'll be laughing. But everyone else, he had him, the fuck out of here. I can't wait to bring that to coach Reed. Yeah, yeah, tell him, oh, I bet he's going to be all over that. We got one last question. Do you have a welcome to Hollywood moment, Conan? That's a good question. Let's see, a welcome to Hollywood. Yeah. I'm going to say, that's a great, I came out, grew up in Boston with the school in Boston, and then went right to L.A. in 1985. I'm 22 years old. And I thought, because I didn't know anything. I mean, you know, I, I was such a rube. I was such a naive guy. And so my writing partner and eyes guy Greg Daniels, we were like, hey, let's go Hollywood. Will we rented a hotel, a hotel room, because we needed a place to stay and we need, you know, when we got started. So we rented a really cheap hotel in Hollywood, because I thought Hollywood was where all the stars lived. And it was going to be really fancy. And I couldn't believe how cheap this hotel room was. So Greg and I fly out on this really cheap flight. It was called People's Express. You guys aren't even born yet. But still you're still ripping sigs on the plane or what? Oh, it was just I'm literally, this is in the day where you don't need a reservation. You barely have to show your ID. You show up, you've given like $60 and they throw you in this cattle car that's an airplane and you fly across the country. And we land and we go and the sun is setting and we get to our little tiny place in Hollywood like with a Bunsen burner, you know, and and then we go out. We should get something to eat and we start walking around and we're walking down Hollywood Boulevard on like a Saturday night. And it is not what I thought it is, you know, rip, I mean, it's rip clubs. It's a really depressing cheesy. There's it's just it is, it is the mode. And we're walking around. And when I said I'm a young 22, I was 22, but I was 64. I was 158 pounds. Oh my god. I was so skinny. And I was at that age where anything I ate just dissolved into it just became nervous energy and hair. So I'm walking around and I'm getting proposition by men, women. There's like neon blanking. There's trash everywhere. There's needles on the sidewalk. And I was like, you know, where's Harrison Ford? Where's Halie Berry? This is frightening. So yeah, I had a real quick education that that no, I'm not going to be hanging out on Hollywood and Vine at night. Unless I become a male prostitute. It's still a goal of mine. A future is still still there for the taking. Honestly, this has been outstanding. We can't thank you enough. My face fucking hurts, man. You are the you're the best brother. We can't thank you for the time. The stories are epic and wishing you nothing but the best man. I want to thank you because I've never appeared cooler to my staff than and I've got a few fans over here who are losing their shit. And and also I'll say this on a sincere note, you're both really funny, really nice people. And that comes through and that's huge. And so I'm just overjoyed to get to talk both of you seriously. And you know, stay healthy, be good. And anytime Jason, you need your kids to be screamed at, you know, wait till your wife's out of town. Yeah, right. Yeah. Way to the wife is out of town. Yes. Yeah. All right. This has been a joy, guys. The best dude. Go over here. And ladies and gentlemen, let's go. You're the best man. All right, that does it for Conan. Did not disappoint. Just fucking electric man. We've been trying to make that episode happen for a long time. And you know, he's just like a legend in our eyes from growing up, watching him. The fact that he's still freaking just like, dude, it's so cool. And in every way, he's going to host the Oscars. And that we're going to get to see him jump through a table, builds my opinion, sounds like on tour at all. I'm not going to be more thrilled with I'm definitely doing tour it off. I'm jumping through another table. I want to see it. All right. That wraps up another episode of new heights. Thank you to Conan O'Brien for being here. You can watch Conan host the Oscars this Sunday. No, Brian needs a friend releases every Monday and Thursday. Oh, and make sure subscribe to the new high channel on YouTube and wherever you get your podcasts. That's right. Once again, new heights. A wendry show brought to you by heels, pet nutrition. Get those little furry friends of yours or none furry friends of yours. The healthiest food that they can get. They can live to be big strong boys or girls. Follow us on all social media at new heights show with one asset. Thanks to our production team, our new heights production team. And all the 92% is out there. We wouldn't do this without you. I promise. See you guys next week. I do got to say the moment you said the thing about cats growing up, I knew you were going to be a wolf arrow fan. That audition for SNL, where he's playing with the Make Believe cat. One of my favorite things of all time. That's a guy who and talk about a guy who's doing it 24/7. He and I were on a flight once cross country. Like, you know, they sat us next to each other on a on a on a red eye. We did a bit the whole time. I never once asked him, how are you? How's your wife? How's your life? He never once asked me, we did a bit that lasted six hours. Let's go. How does that start? You just like immediately go and they just and and will just knows you're doing a bit. I see wheels dead eyes. He's got the eyes of a doll that sharks eyes. I ran out of jaws. He's just got those dead eyes and he's looking at me and I started to talk to him about my love of books and because I had a book in my lap. And we both went into these characters who talked for six hours as if they love books, but neither one of them could read. That was the joke. Flight attendants are coming and we're like waving them off. And like, I couldn't have just had a fatal diagnosis, but I wouldn't have told him because we're in this now, you know what I mean? So stupid.