TOTALED: Carrying Things + Lines Outside Stores

The following podcast is a "Dear Media Production" "Hey, can you come pick me up?" "Yeah, what's wrong?" "Nothing?" "Pretty sure." "Yeah, no, I just need a ride." "Right." "Oh, I don't know why I just want to have fun." "Let's start your engine." "I'm Benito Skinner." "I'm Mary Beth Brown." "And this?" "Is?" "Ride." "Ride." "M-M." "Pretty around." "Wake it, Wes!" "Got it out of our system." "Feel better." "That will not be the last time." "If you think you got it out of your system," "I didn't get out of my system." - Mademorable. - Mademorable. - The bed of mouth. - The bed of mouth. - Wicked, wicked. - Wicked. - That is so-- - That is so coming out. - Oh no. - I do get it. - I don't know. - You all really thought I was mad and horrible, huh? - But I'm wicked. - Wicked, wicked. - Wicked. - So you had the pleasure of introducing me to this, which hadn't come up on my algorithm at all. - Literally, like, to get to share this with a friend. Also, we just came in here with the worst attitude, our producer. She, like, doesn't even know what to do right now. She's, like, totally-- - She left. - She left. She left. She goes, "I've never seen this." - She said, "Just let me know when you're done." - Sometimes when it's in the afternoon, the whole day has beat us up. - Oh my God. Today was, like, 15. You had, sort of, one big annoying thing. - I got Molly walked to the past hour. - I had my day started. I mean, I had 15 annoying things. We don't have to get into all of them. - Please, we can't actually-- - We actually can't, 'cause it's just not fun to listen to. Let's just say I was at my apartment. I did a brand activation today-- - I did a brand activation. - For milk, the dairy beverage. And they were generously sending a card to pick me up. And I knew the confirmation was done. And I got the text and everything. Then I get a call from a New York number. I answered it and they said that they're at the airport. They asked if my flight had landed. I was like, "No." - You go in a lot of ways. Yeah. - What, like, a week ago, yeah. When I came back from-- - It was as before. - As landed. - Yeah. - And I don't know who that person was picking up. My driver was-- - I hope they still picked up somebody. - Somebody, I'm sure. I mean, they had a job to do. But my driver was at my place. So it was just like, it's just that I had to-- You know what I mean? - Why am I picturing some girl at JFK and she has a bag and they go, "Mary Beth?" And she goes, "Yeah." - Yeah. (laughing) - You know what? Yeah. - M M. - M M. - Flip it around. - Okay, so you introduced this to me. I've run in my family completely mesmerized by this bit. - Well, of course, I didn't bring food to Thanksgiving. - I brought Madame Marable to give it to show. When you said that you hadn't seen it, I thought, "I've never had a moment happen like this where I'm more excited like this." ♪ Some people wait a lifetime ♪ For that one special kiss. But to get to show you this. - For anyone else that's like me that I hadn't come up for them, this is Michelle Yo on the Wicked Press tour. Her character's name is Madame Marable. And then if you flip it around, she doesn't have M M with her fingers flipped around with-- - She's like, "She's the real Wicked Witch." - Marri Elizabeth, flip it around, Wicked Witch. - My sister asked from the reference and my cousin and I individually pulled it up on our phones and started playing it at the exact same time. And it sounded like we were in Madison Square Garden. - M S G. - She was headlining M S G with this bit. Imagine headlining M S G with one bit. That's what it felt like. - That's so cool. - And she could at this point. I mean, it's taken the world by storm. - Let's talk about Wicked quickly and usually obviously, and we have to put it out every time we talk about something typical, we usually don't. - Yeah, it's shocking for us. - But as we said, anything can happen, including the end of the world. - Including this episode, which is a total episode, which I don't think we've done one this season. - No, and I'm happy to do it. - I think it's the right day. - I think it's just every now and then you need a little holiday gr-- - It's, hey, worst groom. - It's the Grinch. - Grinch McDoth. - But I actually, okay. And this I think is me just flying past that. (laughing) - Well, and then you go, when you do this grumpy, like Cindy Liu, who bullshit, it kills me. - So this year, I'm really getting into the holiday spirit. And I think it is this sort of reaction to fascism where I go, I need a distraction. I need to pour myself into something. And this year, it's the Christmas spirit. - The mall. - The mall. So it's been, oh, the mall, that just reminded me. When I was little, my cousin, her school was under construction and they moved all the students to the mall. She told me she got to go to school with the mall. For half the year, the school was under construction. Just imagine that's like, how is that not a, like a lot of American nashing movies. - Every person in that class now works in fashion videos. - Merchandising, 100%. - They all went to Parsons at work. - Well, they walked by Express every day and they thought we have to be fashion merchandisers. - I can't stress enough that I wouldn't have learned a damn name, but I would have learned everything I needed to. - Totally. Well, it sounds like the lie of a child to be like, I'm going to school at the mall, but this really happened. - God, I forgot. - I forgot. - I forgot lie of a child. You know, I remember this lie. I told at one point, and it like could have ruined, like a lot of people's lives. - Same more. - As a kid. I just remember my dad would dress up as Santa, and at TCPY, the country's best yogurt, I was with my older sister, and we were getting froyo, and the woman was super sweet to me, and she's like, do you know her? And it's like, sorry, but like, no. - In many ways, yes. - In many ways, yes. But like, I don't know her. But I was like, yeah, she's like, she's friends with Santa. I could have like, ruined my dad's life. I was like, it was so-- - 'Cause of the levels. - Yeah, the levels that were there. She was like, oh, he's just like, I can't find. - You speaking critically. - But I've been thinking about it, and I'm like, that was crazy. - Yeah, but you couldn't have known at the time. - No, but I just loved, I was obsessed with proximity to Santa. Like, who knew Santa, who was close to Santa? - It's so a friend of Judy. - It was so-- - But it's a friend of Santa. - And a friend of Dorothy. - Oh, that's my man. - Not a moribal? - Oh, my God, what? - I say we're gonna do it once. How's 30 times? - Dorothy, that's what it is. It's not a friend of Judy. - Friend of Dorothy. - I don't know why I said that. I mean, Judy Garne, I know why I said that. 'Cause I have, I'm just a girl standing in front of a gay guy, asking him to host a podcast right there. - And you're begging for it at this point. - I have to, yeah. - So my big thing was wicked, and if you-- - So make me beg for you, 'cause I'll beg for you. - My big thing with wicked is that I think, first of all, all you need to do is learn that language, and you can do the spells. That's first of all. Second thing is Glinda, just from what I know about her from the movies is, she's not sitting down and learning that language. - Well, no. 'Cause she-- - It might as well be a rose at a settlement. - Sweet, she's popular. - She's cracking it. - Oh, and a clock tick, everything else I loved. Clock tick is not gonna happen. I said, every time I heard it, I needed to step out for a cigarette. Just one, do be. - Yeah. - It's a clock tick away, but I am interested in the play. I haven't seen the play I really want to now. I mean, obviously, it's much shorter than the two films. So I assume that the language feels more like, of the Lord of the Rings thing, or it's consistent, or like, where it's-- - Oh, it's changing words. - It starts like clock tick. - It's clock tick. - Yeah. - Well, I'm s---ed-ed, yeah. - Well, and bleep. - And bleep that. - And promise me, you'll bleep that. - I will. - Those definitely make my butthole tight, but I really had so much fun at the theater with you. I got chicken strips and say that. I don't, it was crazy. 'Cause here's my thing, it was a matinee. But we were going at 11.45. - And I was like, so we're not eating lunch. - Yeah. - Because like, I'm corn-fed, Idaho. I need lunch around noon. So it was crazy to me to not have a protein, then. Fortunately, at AMC. - Oh, that's halved. - M-m-m-m-m-m. It's hard not to just, I mean, obviously-- - It's hard not to do it. - I guess we want you to do it. - We ride for that, and that's the carpool, but-- - Well, and in many ways-- - What are some of the things in the notes app? I think I wrote one thing this week, but I'm not sure. - Well, I want to talk about my most Republican take, and then I would like for you to talk about when you were a call girl. You're filming over a compensating. - Oh, me? - Or maybe you should go first. - Oh, me? - Because I don't want to, I don't want to leave people hanging on that. Because I've often thought leaving my building. I want to know what my dormant think I do for work. - And I think maybe you gave me that prompt, and I thought back to me at this service, and be out with staying at Toronto. - Oh, I think you laughed, by the way. It's a goose honk. - Oh, you laughed just drunk. - Yeah, sorry. It's just-- - I love a new laugh. - It's just what's happening right now. - Mine, like, it's such a witch cackle that I can't, and it's so obvious now. And because of this wretched podcast, people know when I'm really laughing, so they know when it's fake. - I know. - It's a bummer. And I'm like, "Someone pitching me something I don't like." (laughing) Not the writer's room, but just in general. People keep pitching me randoms, and I'm like, "Oh, God, stop it." So I'm in this Airbnb in Toronto. I just started to notice the hours I was going, so I would leave early in the morning, and I would kind of dress up for set. I thought it'd be cute. It was fun to have a cute little outfit on when I got there, and see what you guys think. Sometimes it would be like, "Ugh, boots, cargo shorts, and a tank top, though." Very, like, Ryan Atwood meets also Marissa. - Yes. - Absolutely. - So if you get that you can kind of the duality there, it's very-- - Yeah. (laughing) - So I go, and I'm fresh-faced, like, no makeup, hair, slicked back, or whatever, and then I would come back with a bigger bag, kind of like look a little sloppy, spray tan-- - Full face of makeup. - Full face of makeup. And it looks like I just gave someone the best night of their life. I give it to Toronto Businessman, the Business Woman's bag. - Special, yeah. - And then on the weekends, I would just go shop. So on the weekends, I would come back with all these bags. So I just was like, I think, potentially, this door man that's kind of giving me a wink every time I enter, I don't think actors at the time, top of his list. No, he's thinking, well, that guy just worked hard for his money. Well, and every time. And he said, and he randomly one time said, do you sex work his work? Yeah, yeah, he did. That came out of nowhere when I was showing him the sweater I bought. Do you know that I became such close friends with the dormant and door woman? I would like on the weekends, they would be like, what'd you get? And I would pull it out of the bags and show them. It was fun. Yeah, we had a lot of fun. And next door was this smoothie place that was the strangest dynamic. And I think they also thought I was the sex worker too, which I was like very flattered. It was a mom and her son. And I've never seen such a. I don't know how to describe it. Like, it was almost like exactly from a movie the way that he was pathetic to her and never did anything right. Oh, sure, sure, yeah. I only got a smoothie there a couple times. Oh, yeah, and it's bizarre. And she would like, I don't know. It's she like, I think. Well, because they had like beakers. Do you know what I mean? They were like doing mixology with the smoothie. They had like a scale back there and like many glass bottles. And it's just like, just make the smoothie. Exactly. I think she was a nutritionist. So it was like a whole, there was like a whole science back thing. But I'm like, this, you know. Well, it's science back. It's double blind tested. Yeah, I'm like, those are still frozen blueberries from whatever the version of Costco is here. Like, I don't know how crazy we're going. Yeah, my life was funny, but I loved it. Of course. And I used to walk in there with you sometimes and it felt good. Well, they said, they said, oh, good, at least there's a sex worker community. Totally. A friend he made on the job. Yeah. And sometimes it would be super late at night. And I think they were worried about me. Yeah. Because it'd be like four a.m. And I'd be getting back. And they're like, God, and sometimes it was a long day on set getting spanked by Adam with a paddle or. Or what have you? Getting stabbed in the woods. Always naked. So I was like coming back and, you know, I was walking, walking slow. Walk them out on these lupus hands. And they said, damn, I know that's right. Shout out to them. Shout out to them. Whoever they may be. Or to see you again soon. Oh, I know, but I'm not allowed in that building. I know. I got sued by the guy. Well, he tried to sue me the owner of the Airbnb because I did break the ice machine, but I didn't know I did. How'd you break it? I have no idea. I guess it was leaking. I was too busy making. But I know you didn't open that freezer once. I didn't open that freezer once, honey. Not a chance. Oh, I did. I had Sophie Pavett face ice. Ice things. Ice. But that's it. Just put on my face. Yeah. But no. Yeah. I don't think I'm allowed back there. And probably he couldn't get the Tanner out of the tub. I tried, but nothing at Canadian tire worked. Wow. I'll be you forget. I changed the shower. Well, sweetie, I'm I know. Don't talk about changing the shower when I change the shower. And you can't stop thinking about it. You crazy. You with a wrench. When I face, I'm bending and he answers and he has a wrench. It's the first time though in your eyes. I was like, she understands why someone would want to have sex with me. Of course. Also, I need help with something at my apartment later. But we'll talk about it. Okay. I hope I can come. Not today. We're dying to watch. He did rivalry together. Because I want to sweat next to Mary Beth. And Pinkie. Yeah. Well, if it ain't time for the Gold Belly ad, have you heard of Gold Belly? It's this amazing site that I order from all the time where you can get the most iconic famous foods from restaurants all across the US. They'll ship it anywhere across the country. It's perfect for hosting loved ones. And it's truly magical. And it's an unforgettable gift making this holiday season one they'll talk about for years. Gold Belly can ship you show stopping meals. Show stopping. Show, show stopping. And that's what I say every time I have the iconic Joe Stone crab in Miami. The famous desserts like the Christmas pie cake in or Martha. Or it's an incredible cake. 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So that was a test to see if you guys were still on the train with us as we did that. Because all your traffic flows through their servers, internet service providers, including mobile network providers, know every single website you visit. And in the US, of course, ISPs are legally allowed to sell that information to advertisers because they live in a capitalistic society. ExpressBPM is the best. It's the lowest price ever right now and plans start at just $3.49 a month. That's $0.12 a day. Oh my god. And here's the thing. It hides your IP address, making it extremely difficult for third parties to track your online activity. You can't see me go from essence to porn to my best website. Good luck. It works on all devices, phones, laptops, tablets and more so you can stay private on the go. So this is something that I've recently just locked into because I think we all just need our data safe. Like the last thing you want is your password taken. I'm sorry. Like we have enough shit to deal with. Like I don't want that to happen to my girls. I want all of their computers totally encrypted. Do you get that? Secure your online data today by visiting expressvpn.com/ridepod. That's EXP-R-E-S-V-P-N.com/ridepod to find out how you can get up to four extra months. Expressvpn.com/ridepod. Where in the world is Mary Beth Maroon? Oh, never tell. Nevada. Like I don't think about it. That people listen to these ads. That's what's exciting. It's sort of this place where we get to just have fun. Yeah. We don't think about being perceived on that note. It's almost 2026 and you're still being rent without bills. We cannot have that. Build is the loyalty program for renters that rewards you for your biggest monthly expense. Rent. I don't like paying rent and I bet you don't either, but Bill makes it feel a little better. Build is the loyalty program for renters that rewards you monthly with points and exclusive benefits in your neighborhood. With built, every rent payment earns you points that can be used towards flights, hotels, lift rides, amazon.com, purchases, and so much more. And when you pay rent through Bill, you unlock access to exclusive benefits from a network of more than 45,000 merchants. Merchants, merchant tiles, just link your credit cards, spend at your favorite local spots, earn bill points on top of your regular card rewards and get one step closer to that trip you wanted to take. Yeah, all the way to Tahiti, baby. Oh, yeah. Personally, I would do my points for Mary Beth. Yeah, you can find me on builds. It doesn't go towards me. This isn't going to get my account. You purchase me. Personally, I am going to redeem my points for my New Year's trip with many drama sevens. Build points have been ranked the most valuable point currency by the point sky. I think I should eat ham. And they just announced build cash a way to unlock even more value from builds partners. Join the loyalty program for renters at joinbuilt.com/ride. That's J-O-I-N-V-I-L-T.com/ride. Make sure to use R-U-R-L so they know that we sent you. Oh, yeah. Oh, I'm built built tough. So my most Republican take and now please keep in mind that I used to work at SoulCycle. I've worked both at HQ and in the studio. Among our responsibilities were, you know, giving shoes to people in the right size, checking them in, helping them with lockers, and also wiping down the bikes after class. Obviously, wiping down the bikes after class, it's like no big deal, but it makes a huge difference, right, in the cleanliness of the studio. Well, of course, I can't imagine the bacteria in there. I believe in just a lot of fluids. I believe in the two classes. I wonder what those things would be without the heat. Yeah. Well, it's also like, it's what you make it. Life's what you make it. So let's make it rock. They were saying crazy things, am I? And then they'd be like, you guys ready for your margarita after that? It was like kind of no. Well, yeah, it's a lemon. In this moment, not exactly, yeah. But I've been to some workout classes where it's like $50 for a class. It's not a full hour, it's like 50 minutes. And then it's my job as the patron to wipe down the machinery. So I might be Republican in this, but I think if you're paying $50 for a workout class, yeah, I just don't want to. Like, I've just worked out. I hope this is the one clip we use for that. Well, we don't control what the AI accounts are clipping, by the way. Oh, my God. That's not us. We would never add that many filters. Just one or two. Please just include the part where I say that I worked at the studio. And I was totally fine with my job description, including wiping the bikes down. We flipped the robots here. Did you watch that? Smahina? Did you watch that? Smahina? How she don't care. I know. That's sweet, man. I know. And maybe I'm fucked up for it. I just think like I did a better job than the riders would do. I wanted to make sure it was actually clean and we had there was a lot of camaraderie. We would blast the music We would wipe down the 50 something bikes spray it in our mouth And then turn them over for the next class So I just think that if I've just paid that much for a class I don't want to wipe the machinery down But that's just me. Maybe there's people doing it and they're totally happy - yeah, I just don't want to I hear that God, I'm gonna be cute again at someone Look at me look at me with this beard y'all Look at him with this beard y'all. Look at me with this beard y'all So I am hosting a swole Santa contest, which I've announced on my Instagram. It's December 13th in New York City if you want to come It's open to everyone to come and I'm gonna be judging hot guys and I'm gonna find the swole Santa I will be there to everyone We're gonna be in the contest. God, maybe I should That's what I'm gonna start with. Oh my gosh. I want to be Santa on stilt You know my big thing is I want to learn how to walk and stilt because I just want one day But I'm not gonna tell you that I've been taking the classes and then one day I go I go look out your apartment window and it's me My god wait you in the middle of the courtyard Stilt I want to be on stilt I keep checking your location and you're somewhere random in like Staten Island. No, I know and you're like what is he doing and you're like It's either trapeze or something like it. Oh my god I tried to get a group of people to do trapeze with me in the summer. Do you remember? No, when was this? Oh? Yeah, for my time. Just know that if I text you something like that the clinical depression has returned Oh looking for any way out. It's sort of like when you texted me after we shot the ride cover and said we have to Reisshoot the cover 12 huskies Okay, babe. Sorry. Your friends are in a tour. I have oh speaking of which yeah I reached out to the Barone who made the come-on-care plunk and like that gothic stained glass. Mm-hmm. We're cooking up a little something. Oh Cooking up something wait. I'm loving our hat. I'm loving the merch. Oh, I love the hot shoe I want to stay kind to teach me how to distress it. Yeah, well last year me Ellen white. So we've you know, I Oldly have decided to look like dog shit on this pod for weeks and weeks I have to I had glam today because of the milk. I know and I hate and it does a body and it does a body And I'm sorry I'm sure she knows but like maybe not it must be so it's probably bliss. I talked to someone who's incredibly famous a few weeks ago And he just said to me straight up. I haven't been on social media in five months He has social media someone's posting for him. You've fully just said I have not been on social media in five months I have to hope Michelle. Yo has not been on social media in five months. I think she would think it was so funny But maybe some of the other tick talks about I mean, I think just wicked in general. That's such a hard movie to be a part of Oh my god That's a true a true nightmare and God you can't even like if you just want to watch one thing I think that's the hardest thing It's like even with overcompetiting. It was like I just want to see the good and then no matter what you always go to the next one Why is he wearing so much blush? It's like cuz I fucking wanted to and sometimes actually that's just rosaceous So actually you've really triggered me and I'm really going through it. I should have said that I don't the casino clip though. I'm like, yeah, no, that's say I think like spice or something I'm a you can't you can't forward with that good luck you'd or I loved it. I'm I was hey. I was happy with it Yeah, should we get into what we die for? We're doing a total episode today. Yeah, I okay? So I was gonna die for falsies false eyelashes. They kind of drive me insane Yeah, but I don't want anyone to think that I think they look bad on people It's just like they drive me insane and that's kind of all say on it So that's like a mini crash I'd say I would say like maybe a little fender bender is I'm just like they just They're never like placed right I guess yours are though I don't think you're such a psycho mate. Well, of course you know me. Yeah, I wouldn't walk out if it's not glued on properly I know I was on set. Mateen has been putting them underneath my lashes. That's delicious. Which is perfect a few like the individuals I can imagine strip lashes cuz the glue comes off and it's like y'all need to be looking out for that you have to be in my head in my head The oh my god the individuals take up to six hours because they're putting like what they have to put a hundred tiny ones in the corner I mean, I think it's all artistry, but it's something in me. I it's like the OCD I just want to peel it off. I know immediately. I just want to go. Oh, yeah, get a tweezer in there. Yeah, maybe I'll put them on I'll start wearing them every day. So that's a mini die because I think you fear the most Batman. I fidget literally Yeah, I don't fly away. I fidget so much. Oh, the ending of wicked was very similar to and clip that no that was a movie Sorry, the ending of like it was a fucking movie by the way, it is dark night. Oh, did I send you that? No. Oh, okay I just came up with that. Oh, it was on threads and it was like they made the posters the same and I was just like How have I not sent this to Mary Beth and I guess maybe I didn't have Wi-Fi. I guess you're not thinking at me Yeah, cuz then and then someone has to die for good or something. So it's Glinda low-key Batman them Glinda's two face Which actually kind of makes sense She was kind of flip-flopping in that one. I thought Ariana Grande was incredible in that movie. Everyone put in very good acting performances 100% I loved oh my god. I loved that sexy with alpha bun. She has that big sweater. No, I mean you want to buy a big sweater It made me want to do the opposite to return a big sweater. Yeah, interesting Okay, not in a bad way. You didn't want one Don't think I need one. I have a really big one and I actually thought like maybe I should give that to Mary Beth You know that big blue one I have no, but I want it cool So I will be dying for lines outside of stores and I will be dying for Carrying things Wait, where are we going who cares ride? And I would love to go first. Hey, the things Mary Beth carried cuz I don't want to be carrying this I don't want to be sitting on it So there's something about me is I have a lot of body pain the body keeps score and I've been through a lot Really so what a dumpster fire year. I'm excited for your 2026 Same no seriously. I need this year to end. Yeah, me too. So I have a lot of shoulder pain chronic neck pain my neck hurts right now It's like a whole thing. I had to change how I sleep. I can't sleep on my stomach anymore I have to sleep on my back inside because of my neck That's tough just to add on top of everything else this year I had to change my sleep style after 34 years. It's like give me a fucking break. No, I can't even imagine I'm constantly in pain all the time and I have this physical therapist in Midtown who I love and he's really helping me I Just buys carrying things. I don't want to do it. I want someone else to do it. Mm-hmm I want to have a boyfriend or a stud girlfriend who is carrying my shit or a stud gay guy. No stud girl friend That's a girl friend. I'm the sad girl friend. Yeah So I just want someone to carry my shit like I just really don't want to I just don't want to this is the reason why I could never rob a house I ain't carrying the shit out. No exactly. No chance. We pointed out to Stug Girl friend Bonnie. Best case stud girl friend Bonnie. Call me Bonnie. I'll call you Bonnie. Mm-hmm I think I don't know. Maybe I sound like it's a little brat this episode. I'm just like I don't want to clean sweaty gear What did we tell them? I am so mad at Morrible and you are so wicked which carrying things. Yeah, it bums me out So when I got to this brand activation today. I had to bring all my wardrobe my laptop my bag a bag with shoes in my hair It's such a tiny girl so many things and I got chopped off and then I had to get get into one-world trade So I was just carrying all this crap I don't want you to sound like we're just complaining non-stop if anything. I just want to Empower we're all about empowerment this season. I think that's been our big theme Empower you to just have a bitch session at about something that's pissing you off Don't post about it maybe on social media because I feel like sometimes even this episode I'm just like worried about how it's gonna be perceived but I just yeah, I'm a delicate flower and I don't want to carry stuff and I mean It sucks like I sometimes I enjoy it because I'm like I want to be useful like I was at your house for Thanksgiving Make goodness how gorgeous was that it was a really fun your mom and so I love all your family But your mom and I oh my god your mom was wearing this fedora by the end of the night I believe it was your dad's so sad and we could not stop going Wait, I'm gonna piss my face Come on, babe. Come on When you walk can never there's a scene And then what was the other one we did we did that oh yeah It's a new day It's a new life for me Feel it and your mom takes that off Because we were sharing a bed so pinky was in her crate, which was in my dad's office, which is next to my parents room So in the morning my mom would text me your girl is chirping For one pinky woke up. Sorry. That's incredible your girl is chirping. She sent me the exact same text two days in a row Your girl is chirping. She's perfect They love so we're having oh my god and just like the amount of bags I had in that house she goes Are you moving in promise speaking of carrying things carrying things? Oh my god I've been carrying things for weeks. I've been yeah, I've been like I'm in between I'm in between places right now I'm it's I wish I was out of brand activation But I'm in between places right now so oh god. I've been carrying things on stop So I really hear that but something about on set I really love carrying things like I love my big tote bag And then my other tote bag and my backpack I love carrying things because I kept thinking like I'm not a really a cook here, but I would love to you know you know, this big ol' rig I got. - Stairs, downstairs, things like that. - Yeah, so I'm happy, I'm the stud girlfriend. I'm the girlfriend it's stepped up. - You are, and my other thing is like, 'cause I'm constantly on the hunt for like the perfect bag, but I had this realization at one point as I was shopping and I just thought there is no such thing as the perfect bag because the perfect bag is a bag that someone else is carrying for me. - So cool. - So until I get to that point, maybe that'll never happen. - And yeah, I do. - It's just an aspiration of mine. - So then would the thought be that you get a bag that your guy would love to carry? - Maybe. - A little. - Well, I want that to your bag on the real world. - And Hermes Kelly's so bad. - Oh, I know, I love that bag for you. - I'm eyeing it, but you know how I know it's over price 'cause it's still available. And I'm not gonna be the fool that pays that much. - It's a nipple, it's not from a nipple baby, by the way. It's from a true similiate. - Totally, yeah, and I wonder where they're getting rid of it. We'll never know. - Too many bags. It was so funny. We were at the dinner with Mary Beth in her family. She was like, "I really want this to your bag." I was like, "Okay, let's see if I can guess it," and I got so close. - Gustingly close to what it was. - Yeah. - It really, that was one of the times everyone. - Your brother was like, real recognize, real. - He goes, "Oh, so you know ball." - Yeah, and they said, "Oh, ball, yeah." - I know ball. - Maga Moro ball, motherfucker. - I will say another thing I'm doing because carrying things can also be metaphorically. I'm going to see like a cranial something masseuse tomorrow. Or we know Wednesday. - I'm just carrying that galaxy brain around. - It's really heavy, it hurts. But I think there's just a lot of narratives. I'm like, clinging onto that I need to let go of so I can like, free myself. - Oh, totally. - Because I've just been carrying a lot. And obviously this year too, it's like added a bunch more. I need a clean house. I need to get out with the old and with the new trauma. - Come on now. - Come on now, trauma. - Can't wait to meet yet. Here's a seat at the dinner table. - Welcome to the dinner table. - Those meditations that are like, let all your things, let them sit at the table. And I'm like, I think we can tell her she's good. - She's done for now. - You're actually not in my-- - Things that happen to me in college, where I'm just like, I want to let that go. - Well, you know, make a TV show and you are. So we're getting pretty close. - Do you see how my neck hurts? Like, I'm having a massage on it. - Oh my, it's the things I carry in this low back. Can someone carry this ass around for me for a couple days? Holy shit. - My air pods are too heavy. They're giving me neck pain. My air pods. - The big ones. - The big ones, you have to say this. - They're not the big ones. - It's the in the air ones. - Oh, sweetie. - I physical therapist said that's what's doing it. - Why are you so correlized? - I don't know. I am in so much pain. - I think if I had someone to like hold me and take care of me, it would help, at least a little bit. I have to imagine it would help a little bit. - Oh, and by the way, I'm not dating right now. Isn't that cool? - Yeah. - I'm not dating until after I do my special. - I love that. - I just don't want to. - You told that to me and I thought that was-- - I don't want to do it. - As your friend, I was doing thumbs down and then you said that and I went-- - Can I say? - Thumbs up. - With Kid Witch. - In that moment I thought matamorable actually. - Yeah, I don't have emotional bandwidth capacity, et cetera. - Yeah. - I just need to focus. - I'm so excited. It's going to be so fabulous. And yeah, why do you want to deal with all that bullshit? - No, I have enough. I need to make room for the-- - I would say, and new year, I mean, the new beginnings. I mean, I can't even get into it. I've been back on the pattern app lately. And it's just, I'm like completely retrope. - Pattern is so funny because I feel like that came out maybe in pandemic and it was like, guys, I'm able download the pattern app instead of going to therapy. - Well. - You're doing both. - What if Amanda did both? - Imagine how healed you're about to be. - Oh, speaking of which, so for anyone who's going through a dermatitis journey, like yours truly, I can't. I actually don't even look at me. It's a whole thing. - I can't comment on it 'cause you look fine. - I love you. - I love you. - I wish I could. - People love the hair, facial hair too. - I wish I could see myself through your eyes. - Me too. - I was working with a specialist and it's kind of like nervous system component. And it's like just always feeling unsafe and it's so common to just be like, you're watching the news, you're going on the internet, you're doing all these things make you feel so unsafe. So just being more thoughtful of just you'd be carrying a little bit less. - I think this is actually really beautiful that you've crashed for this. - It's two things. - I'm about to crash. - Yeah. - I hate seeing you carry things because you already carry the weight of the world on your shoulders. Let me take that back. - Thank you. - My love is super love. - Third love. Third love. - Third love makes better bras. - Whoa. - Here he is. - Here he is. - Founded by women who are sick of settling for bras that were good enough. Daddy wears third love. - Of course he does. - Yes and she takes it off in the middle of dinner and goes, "I'm cold." 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Picture this. You're going about your day when suddenly a horrifying thought flashes through your mind. I want to kill Benny drama seven in cold blood. Maybe it's a fear of something happening to a loved one. So me, a disturbing or sexual image that keeps replaying in your mind or an urge to do something you don't want to do. Your heart races, your pumps sweat and anxiety washes over you. You're mortified and you feel fully convinced that it's true. Even though you know you don't want to kill Benny drama seven in cold blood, that's not who you are. But still, the question of, why did I think that? Am I a bad person? What was that? Start to consume you and you feel like you have to do something. Anything, make them go away. That sounds familiar and I know during the holidays, it definitely does for a lot of you. Here's the thing about those disturbing unwanted thoughts. They're more common than you think. In fact, almost everyone has them. 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But after the pandemic, a few stores thought we liked that. Create the illusion of exclusivity. Yes, I made the mistake within this past year of around a straight guy saying like, "Supreme's like business model." And this man launched into it and I had just brought it up, meaning I knew what it was. It's like, you know you'll sell this many units? Cut it in half. There you go. Supplying to man, it was explained to me. But I know that that's the illusion of it. Just the line outside Missouri in like near Maught Street. I'm just like, and do you understand that the line outside Missouri is also a poem? Like I just read it. - I know. - Yeah, that was like beautiful. - Yeah. - But there's something about it That's just driving. me insane because I'm like, you have room in the store. Just let people into it. This is insane. And I'm just like literally going in there to get like one thing quickly. Like you're being crazy. Yeah. You sound insane right now. Me at the front. Me with the bouncer. You sound insane. I'm trying to get a chain bracelet. It's just driving me crazy. And it's everywhere. It's rampant. Like if you go anywhere in New York and in LA, oh my god, there's a lot. They make lines for everything now. I know. I'm sure some stores are doing it for lost prevention because they don't want things to get lifted out of the store. However, here's what I will say. Yeah. Think about it because it's like constantly. Think about it's a forest like come on down because they've figured out that the amount of product that they're losing and via theft is offset by the number of people that are in the store spending money because that's what it comes down to. Yeah. It's like, is it it's a cost benefit analysis in a lot of ways? I could explain this to any of the people, any of the people and you go the bouncer's is this line deterring enough customers who would have bought that are not going to buy because they're not going to wait to offset like a ring or two going missing. I don't know the answer to that. Maybe Missouri has figured out that it does make sense. But there's many, many other stores that have things all behind glass or the items are not as easy to like put in. And it's just like, why are you? Okay. Yeah. We went to a club in London. Oh my god. Speak line to 15 people. We get to the front. Yeah. The place is empty. Empty. Yeah. Somehow the people in front of us in line weren't even in there. It was just us. No, no, well, they do understand that they went out the back door and went right back in the line. It was a little caterpillar. Yeah. We got fucked. It was an amusement park ride. I know it was totally insane. But I just I don't like the optics of it. I don't like that. You know what I'm really bumping up against lately is the optics of exclusivity. The optics of I can't say it exclusivity. If you have to fake it, it's not exclusive. Come on now. I just don't I don't like it. I really don't. Oh my god. Edit outlets like the cap is on outlets outside Palm Springs. I'm like, let me in. Let me in. No, let me stay in line. Stay in line. But it's like, oh my god. Like you have enough so like sales associates and like all of these things have they have the what's it called? Like the little monitors. Yeah. Yeah. Of course. You know, oh yeah. The BBB, you know, the set, whatever they call the sensors. But my other thing is like everyone's talking about how brick and mortar struggling. Everyone's going online. I have a few notes and I think I can get I can get us back. Cut the shit. Schools in malls. Schools in malls. Schools. That's how we revive the art form of malls. Imagine the popular girl going to Orange Julius. Effie Mining. She's eating Panda Express. Orange chicken every day for lunch. I just think it's not good for business. It's not good for business. And that's my thing. And it's just yeah, I think that's the thing too. It just it's like a lead us. It's annoying. And it's like the it's like all these weird power dynamics in it. And it's just like come on. Jude. Jude. Actually, this feeds into something that I've been bumping up against. I hate to be so negative. But I'm having like event fatigue. And it's not even like attending events. It's more just like how many events. And I think because I engage with a post about events, they're coming up more for me. And I'm just like, it's just a lot of events. Yeah. It's a lot of events. Like let's see if we can like slim it down to like a couple of year you guys. I know we can do it. Yeah. It's just feeling like every store opening in every city. It's like an event. I know which I'm like, I'm happy to see stores opening, I guess that means. But then they have a line outside because of the event. Of course. More Lions for Benny Jama. Still girlfriend to Mary. So I got on the New York magazine. Culture Audi 50 list. And someone goes, they spelled Mary best name wrong when it was me. It said me. And I was like, that's so funny. Kind of dragging me. But I was like, that's incredible. I was like, I love that. I love reading me down. For that. Of course. I'm going on Wednesday. Yeah. God. It's so weird because I'm such a terrible dinner guest lately because we're just like, we're in the thick of right in this big puppy. So I literally just be sitting there in like a song or a player or something. And I'm like, there it is. Yeah. I think I feel distant. I'm sure I'll be such a fun Christmas guest. Yeah. It's end of the year. It's like, there's just maybe there's a lot of fatigue. I think there's fatigue everywhere. And oh, God, I can't imagine the lines during the holidays outside majority. There was a huge line outside. Ever lane today, too. I was like, the fuck. Like that's a big story. That's a huge story. So I broke the glass. And I said, for everybody. Yeah. For everyone. You brought a big log like in Beauty and the Beast. I didn't need it. I did a big. Yeah. Back. I did one bat. You brought a bat. A supreme baseball bat. Yeah. A metal one. Yeah. It's a lot of fatigue. I'm feeling to be ordinary. I guess it is. Speaking of fatigue, we are doing two re-run episodes over the holidays. I just want to preface that I would love for you to still listen to them. Like even if you've heard them before, we're doing Encyclopedia of Ride. Listen again. What a kill you to listen again. Hey, come on. We would never not listen to the Encyclopedia ride again. I can't stop thinking about we would never not come to dinner because it's like so us in every single way. I also think we miss quality, too. Like it wasn't that. No, but I actually think you're so right. But like I'll never check it. I can see it also vividly. Like we would never not come to dinner. Us that Thanksgiving. Yeah. Me at any event during, oh my god. I played just dance. There was so much joy. There were a ton of things to ride for today. But like let's freaking crash and burn. I feel bad. I'm like, are people going to be mad about this? I don't know. You know what? I just feel bad. I don't want to be negative. I guess we're positive a lot of the time. I have to be negative about one more thing. So while you're flying, I almost crashed for this, but then it felt too like really specific and maybe the title would have gotten too long. It would have gotten flagged. But unless you have a connecting flight, that better be leaving very soon when you come from back of the plane or it can be either one seat behind and you try to cut the person who's in the seats before you to get off the plane. There's a social contract. You'll be meeting floor. Yeah. You'll be meeting. You'll be meeting the runway and it's because Benny drama broke your knees. And you can tell, I feel like when someone has a connecting flight because they're always, they're always conferencing with the flight attendants. I can always tell. Yeah. And that to me, I'm like, go. Go get your girl. I literally almost grabbed by the shoulder. Go get her. He's like, what? Wait, actually, that's a challenge this holiday season. If somebody, if somebody gets to have the pleasure of cutting you on a plane, and you think it's for all the right reasons, grab them by the shoulder. No matter the gender and say, go get her. Go get her. And wink. I will. Merry Christmas. Like you're the one who allowed them to. Right. Yeah. Yeah. That's nice. Oh, I was at this gay event in London. And again, I do piece so bad. And it was the first time in my life where I was like, I wonder if this straight girl, I'm not saying that I just immediately knew she was straight. But I did in every way. She was a straight girl at this kind of gay night. It was like a dance night. And I just had to be so bad. And I was just like, can I please cut? And she was like, I got you girl. And it was just the first time in my life I would have ever really done. Cause I'm like, women spend their whole lives waiting in lines to go to bathrooms. Like that's just kind of like, I can imagine how much your life was wasted. She did in that moment. And I think she understood what pride meant. So I'm just shouting her out wherever you are. Wherever you are, is that Kesha? You are throwing out some musical references this episode that I do not know how to be hard and dairy back in the days and down the sanctuary out of marble. Not in marble, like in which you know what you are, Benny. Your words not mine. Babe, you're my rider. Die. Ride or die. So I obviously die for lines outside of stores. I mean, if you have a good reason, I guess fine. But my immediate instinct if I see that is like, what's going on in there? And actually don't tell me. And furthermore, I don't need to see it. Me every time I'm like, I, it makes me sad, but I go, I can get it online. I say that to everyone in line. Get the shit on mine. Hey, get this shit on mine. Hey, hey, you got this shit on mine. Cause you go in the store and they don't have any stock. So you think you're going to go in there to try something on. Forget about it. I ride for carrying things. I die for you having to carry things. Thank you. Do you understand that? It's like, I hate seeing you carry a big old thing. Last night you had trash and I was going to take it, but then you wanted to walk with me. Yeah, I wanted to walk you to elevator. But I was happy to get my arm, my forearm workout for you. I think, yeah, it's just living alone too. I'm just like, I am responsible for so much of my own shit. And I know that many people are living that way. I'm not saying it's just me, but it would be nice to share in a lot of ways to share the load sometimes. Let's share this load. Share the load. Find someone you can share the load with. So I hope this episode wasn't too much of a bummer. And I don't know. Maybe send your group chat. You all have an opportunity. Oh, have I told you guys this in my chat? It's good for people. It's good for everyone. You know, it's like, it toxic positivity does exist. I mean, on then you got to be like, and we're keeping it real. And it feels so good. Like, oh, God, and everyone's going to go home and you see friends and family and whoever. And just sometimes you got to just bitch. My favorite person to bitch, she was a person who's wrapping presents. Get them in a room. Oh, yeah. Get that bitch in a room. Oh, yeah. Close the door and say, yeah, no. And we did that. We did a little side barring at Thanksgiving. I my favorite thing in the world to go close the door to take you and Vicki into a room and go with them. Yeah, in my group chat and my friends from high school my friend Emily said we should start doing a wreck of the week Like a recommendation of the week. So every week everyone has a recommendation and then one week one week Auto correct changed it to wreck of the week as in WRECK like car wreck of the week Yeah, so then sometimes when we have a negative thing we do a wreck up the week. Oh, I thought it was a compilation video of like car wrecks I love this one. I mean that would be cool. Maybe no casualties. Well, of course always no casualties Yeah, maybe just take some space for a wreck of the week this week and there really are two people two types of people in the world The people who stare at wrecks when they pass them and the people who don't I never do. It's not I want to I'm on my way a place That's so crazy. Also, I'm like, what if I see something that alters like my brain chemistry for the rest of my life Yeah, I don't want to see that that's between them and God. Whatever happened. I'm like a god. It's really private It's private and guess what you're holding up traffic. Let's go. Let's go Let's go. It's a movie. It's a movie in your experience. You should know that you're an adult. Oh my god. Wait This weekend someone in my family asked Bikki something and we were quoting. It's a movie So as the person was walking away she goes you're an adult. You should know that and then she's like wait I didn't mean you though. Yeah, no, sorry. Yeah, sorry. Oh God. Sorry. We were doing a really specific Britney Spears of meme award for work. Yeah. Yeah Madamore Marvel Wicked Witch Oh, my exit. Any babe eyes in the road There you go Right Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode