This episode of the Legion of Skanks podcast is a celebratory and chaotic farewell to Tristan Bowling, who is leaving after 15 years. The hosts—Big J Elkerson, Luis J. Gomez, and Tristan—are joined by guests Crack Amico, Zach Amico, and Tim Butterley, who promote their upcoming comedy specials and tours. The main event is the Spring Turn Olympics finals, where three interns—Cerebral Paul, Gimmick, and Nutsack—compete in a lie detector test to determine who advances to a rap battle for the coveted unpaid internship. The results are comedic: Gimmick admits to gay sexual experiences, including enjoying making another man ejaculate, while Cerebral Paul and Nutsack answer questions about personal topics, with some responses marked as undetermined. The show also features humorous discussions about a flight instructor who jumped to his death, leaving a student to land the plane, and a comedian who was booed and hit with a bottle onstage. Throughout, the hosts weave in sponsor ads and playful banter, maintaining the show's signature crude and irreverent tone. The episode builds toward the rap battle finals, promising more chaos and entertainment in the remaining hours.
-Fill her up! -You're listening to the gas digital network. ♪ When you hit that bomb drop, blah, blah ♪ ♪ You know what to do, open up the pit ♪ ♪ Bitch, I'm coming through ♪ ♪ Big J, the battle rap champ ♪ ♪ All up in your ass with the strap, red attack, tag ♪ ♪ Unload the clip, I got a bone to pick ♪ ♪ Twins, these blinches don't win a bowling pin ♪ ♪ Puerto Rican rattlesnake, venom in your veins ♪ ♪ Natural born killers, bleeds in the skies ♪ ♪ Wow, I'm coming through ♪ ♪ All up in your ass with the strap, yeah ♪ -What's up, everybody? Welcome to your favorite podcast. To my right, as always, it is "Tristan Bowling." -Woo! -Yeah, "End of an Arrow," dude. 15 years tonight's "Tristan's Last Show." To my left. As always, the Puerto Rican rattlesnake, Louis J. Gomez. He ain't going nowhere. -This is all I have. -I'm Big J Elkerson. We are the legendary Legion of Motherfuckin' Skanks. -Yeah, you guys are being here. -We have a great show for you guys today. I do want to point out that before the show started, Louis pointed out that parents of a friend of his sons from a school player here in the show. And now all I can think about is Louis not being himself this entire show, dude. -Do you think he showed up because he was in a-- -Louis, you're fulfering. -You don't even know what to say. -But I'm saying, do you think he showed up because his daughter was in a curse? -Do you think he showed up because his daughter was in a play with me or a fan and then was like, "Oh shit, Louis J. Gomez's son is in a play with my daughter." -I don't know. -Yeah. -He might be here to serve you. -He knows what I do. I'm assuming. -Yes, he knows. -Yeah. -This is not-- I'm not hiding anything. -Do you know what your son tried with his daughter backstage? -They did almost kissing the play. -They did almost kissing. -They did almost because they stopped each other. -But you said James said she was begging for it. -Yeah, well, he's-- -I'm talking about it the entire time. -I'm not going to talk about this guy's daughter. -Huh? -I'm not going to actually talk about this guy's daughter. -Did you just cut my mic? Did Louis give you a signal to cut my fucking mic? -Let's introduce our guests. -We have great fucking guests tonight. -Coming on the show, what order should we do? You point to the order and I'll go. -Top. -Just do it. -Let's get a rhythm. -Everybody you know from Two Bears, One Grave, from his song, "Read Money." Go subscribe to his YouTube. -Because it is fucking great. We love him over here. It's the great crack, Amiko. -Hi. -Hello. -Crack Amiko and the mother fucking hell. I can't hear anything in my headphones. It's almost like they're not on. -Track, very nice to have you on the show, my friend. -Great to be here. -Yeah, UT is a very big announcement for the end of tonight's show. -Oh, yeah, it's big. -Huge. -It's big, damn. -Our second guest. Not to be confused with our first guest. -Yes, a new guest, digital half hour coming out very, very soon. You know him from the morning, Zoo. The Midnight Spook Show. It's everybody's favorite. The international superstar, Zach Amiko. [ Cheers and applause ] -Hello, gentlemen. -Zackery. -We weren't going to put Zach in the middle seat. That would have been fucking bananas. -Yeah, come on. I had the foresight to hug the wall on this one. -If you were to fight and Zach went to go sit in the middle seat, I would start crying and fighting the entire staff. -I had a lady recently. I had the aisle scene and then they moved me to the middle. And the lady got on and just went, "No." And called the flight attendant over and wouldn't sit down. -I would write a letter. I would be so loudly, huffie and puffy. -There has to be rules in this place. -We have some decorum. We're the country of laws. -Listen, if I sit on this side, it's going to fuck up the bounds of the plane. -I'm so pissed, Zach. -That's been at least our final guest. So excited he's in town. He also has a new guest, digital half hour coming out very soon. You know, from the Dad Me Podcast, have had it for our friend Tim Butterley. -Hey, I sat next to a big girl on a flight recently. -Are you calling me a big girl? -You think the space issue is going to be what really drives you nuts. But what you're not prepared for is the amount of heat radiating off of a body this shape. -Oh, yeah, it's going to like flat. It's going to like iron. -You feel like a spitting swarma sitting next to them just getting f*cking crooked on one side. -Yeah, that is bad. -Yeah, but your clothes are so wrinkle free by the end of that flight. -You get f*cking steamed. -Oh, they really are. Dude, that side is f*cking pressed. -I can feel it. I can feel it from right here. It's crazy. -Really? -Yes. -That's my Latino heat. -He radiates a heat. -You think I'm f*cking around? Put your hands four inches from the bottom. -Well, Zach is half microwave. [ Laughter ] -If you guys knew that about. -The food cooks in there. -Yeah, dude. -Who's pushing in his mouth the wrong way? -He cooks in his mouth. -I like to think of myself as an air fryer. -You get pretty strong chewing frozen burritos. [ Laughter ] -Look, I'm very excited about today's show. You guys came on a great night. It is Tristan Bowling. After 15 years of being with the show, this is his last show. -I know. -Very sad. -We hate to see him go. -End of an era. -End of an era. -We also have the finals for this year's Spring Turn Olympics. One Spring Turn-Up. -Spring Turn-Up. -Lambick Spring Turn-Up. -Spring Turn-Up. -Spring Turn-Up. -Spring Turn-Up. -Yeah. -Spring Turn-Up. -Spring Turn-Up. -Spring Turn-Up. -Spring Turn-Up. -Spring Turn-Up. - Everywhere we go. - Let's make it.
two thousand. So if you win, you're up. I hate losing. Yes, let me say this. Not only do I hate losing a thousand dollars, I hate losing a thousand dollars to Jay. You do it so much. I know. I've lost thousands of dollars to Jay. It's never ending. I feel like you said, the word specifically barely or you said, weren't working or can we give a synonym for barely? No. Only barely. He's talking to your microphone. He might have said, I can't really hear anything. Yeah. He might have said, there might have been a qualifier. I'm not here to cast out, but I'm thinking there might be a qualifier in there. Well, yeah. What's argument? No, if you said, if you said, oh, you said barely. And then Alex, I'm not positive. Alex goes take the bet. I'm not taking the bet only because I'm not positive. You said the word barely. No, this isn't the one. I'm going to get this thousand dollars back one day. It's not going to be today. It's every seven hundred thousand dollars right now. Oh, do double or nothing. To me, my sister would do that when we're kids. It was the time when I owed her like eight million dollars. It just kept on getting doubled. I think you guys are about even now. Yeah, she's taken it from your house 20 to time. Oh, my God, dude, she stole my fucking, she stole my my flip flops. Man, if there is any indication that you your family is Puerto Rican, it is your sister. Yeah, your sister's all the Puerto Rican stuff. Flip flop thief. Yes, steals flip flops. Check that test. Her chocolate. That's chocolate. As long as you're not flipped and you're just going to let that slide. Thank you. That was a great joke. Oh, she's going to beat her kid with her hands. Well, anyway, look, it's a huge day. We have the finals of the internal Olympics, which we are going to set up a pretty soon here. It's two parts because we have three internal Olympians left, right? We have two and a half. We have cerebral Paul, we have gimmick, and we have nut sack, which is great guy. Clap it up for our final Olympians. The audience, proved them. I said this to many, don't prove them. I said this to many people this week and they were come talking about the interns to me in Harrisburg. They were talking about nut sack. And some people don't like nut sack. And I was like, I was surprised by that. And I go, you know what it is? I got to take these two in as just a sweet couple. She makes the rugs before. So I was like, oh, they're big fans. They're really nice. They come see all the shows. But nut sack has been an insane lunatic for the last seven weeks. So sure, but I don't know if that's the real him or not. Nut sack is problematic, I would say. No, I think he's a real go getter. Well, he keeps on coming in and he'll be like, he was like, you guys don't know what you're doing about audio. Let me fix your audio for you. And that just offends the productions that they hate that you can't keep your wife hydrated enough to piss, bro. I'm going to take your electric advice. Fuck right off. Can I say another thing that was it? It was interesting that was brought up to me because because one of the things we're doing is we're going to start with the light detectors here soon. They were going to put one of the questions that we're trying to to include it in this for gimmick. But I don't only think it should be a question. I just think we should just bring up this fact. Seraphina told us while she was using your phone to film stuff. She opened up your browser and there was all like a wild amount of porn that was opening your browser. 20 tabs was 20 tabs was the number. Yeah, 20 tab. Who's and gimmicks finally. So he was looking at him. But then I was like 20 tabs of porn on Seraphina. Is that a picture of his browser? She took a picture of your browser. Thank you, Seraphina. That is fantastic. Good job. Seraphina is learning the job. What was he looking at? Was it any children? It's one of the titles. It was nuts. Wow. It's fantastic. So, gimmick. How many do you think you have open right now? gimmicks watching a lot of porn. That's all right. That's not that. If you're opening a new tab every time you click, that could just be he jerked off for he got there. Yeah, he also can just been looking for the right thing to jerk off to. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. They always do it. They do open a new tab sometime. Yeah, that's why this is why you jerk on a computer. Yep. I can't jerk off my phone. That's insane. Not insane. I don't get up here. If I was jerking off too small. If I was jerking off to like a person closer to your eyes. If I was jerking off to a personal thing. But it's child pornography then for the right size. This is someone to one aspect ratio. If I'm watching, if I'm going on porn websites all day, computer. Yeah, I can't do it. Yeah, so I'm looking at like a girl sending me nudes. Yes, I'm out transferring those to my computer like a lunatic. Yeah, one of my guys I got to buy a fucking UCB, C-D-U-C-P-C-U-S-B. You have to get an operate to this. You have to do mild improv. I have to get to level four improv before I can fuck it. The fuck? You need an incredible S-A accusation where you can jack off. I'm a transferring via fucking external hard drive nudes from a girl. This is it. That's what you jerk off on the phone. Yes. Computers meant for porn every single time. Yes, that is just that. That's just adults. But that's Tristan Tristan so young that I guarantee you that that's just his generation. I guarantee you young boys are jerking off to their phones regularly. Want to put a thousand dollars on it? Not damn it. That amount of thousand dollars. And then immediately acting in a play with this guy's daughter. I bet you I can act in that play and also jerk off of my phone for a thousand dollars. But you're honestly, man, I don't think I got it in me, but you should take the bet. Yeah. You, Tristan, what's what's that important to you, jerk off to you? You're a young, young man. I feel like you guys are like it's a new generation. You guys won't look at like great porn or anything. You think our generation does that? Don't I? No, I feel like you're an outlier and you're a generation. I don't think you even type that into your fucking computer. That's great. You're like, no, you're the Billy Joel of Rape porn. Oh, somebody told me that he's a Rape porn. I don't even like interracial. They, they, they, uh, they change it. So you can't type in Rape porn. You can't type in forced, but I talked about this recently on another phone. You found go around. No, there is. There's a word that you have to use in order to pull up rapes. You don't have to. You don't have to. Sorry, you know it. You know it. What is it? Concentral, not consensual. Thank you, sir. Thank you, sir. Thank you, sir. He said it like it was a gift. That's definitely a birds of a flat of other types of situations. And that's where you can find that's where you can find really fun, really fun. Rape porn. You see? I'm like, sir, Rape porn. See? No. He's okay with it. His daughter is gonna play with my son. Thank you. Lucky James. So I'm excited about these. We'll get into some of these things in a minute. Do you want to, I didn't, I don't know what you want to talk about, Jay, this, I didn't see this story at all. No, I heard about it. It's pretty hilarious. The flight instructor. Yeah. There was a flight instructor who jumped, jumped to his death mid flight, leaving a 22-year-old to land the plane. Now that's pretty interesting for sure. We could talk about that, but I also saw today an Indianapolis Helium. A committee was on stage and he got booed by the whole crowd. They started throwing a bunch of shit at him. And then one guy throws a bottle. It almost hits him in the face. It's awesome. Oh, there's video of it. Yeah. I saw the tail end of it. We're just being like, now hold on, hold on. That's all they have is a tail end of it. And he ducks and covers. He runs once that bottle almost has his face, he just goes, nope. He just walks off stage. So he's bombing first. All you see is they already hate him. There's not, I wonder, there might be more to the story. Maybe he was killing so hard. The video picks up with, nah, fuck y'all. Does it? Yeah. I think he insulted a guy being like, you look like you're wearing your dead homies clothes. Yeah. Everyone's just like, well, that means something to me, I guess. And then they all proceed. Pretty great. Or the guy jumps out. Either way, we have stuck in the money for a lot of techers. Yeah. Yeah. We will. They got to take their pre questions. Can I use one of the interns? You could do whatever you want. I need, uh, preferably a water, but definitely an ass tray. Is it going to bother you if I smoke a cigarette? No, I don't care. You're good. Correct. Usually the interns mouths are uses ass trays. But tonight's an a fun exception. That's actually a great point. If one of you guys were really good interns, you would come over and let us use your mouth as an ass tray. And I'm looking at you, Nutsack. You have that energy. Nutsack will let us eat sushi off his naked body. You know, Nutsack, he drank a cup of piss. We said, take a shot. He was like, fuck it. He chugged the entire cup of piss. How you remembered? He took a little sip and we made him chug it. No, that's not true. He wasn't stoked on it. He didn't take a little sip. I'll bet you $1,000 first. He didn't take a little sip at first. But he didn't want to do the whole thing. He didn't want to do that. No, he didn't want to. But he only had to take a shot and then he drank the whole thing for no reason. It was far too much piss. I thought we'd bullied him into more. It was too much piss to be ingested. I think he barely drank the whole cup. Yeah. No, the whole thing was gone. All the piss was gone. You can barely do that all you want. But the piss will be gone. I got to be on a thumb laying eyes on your graduating class for the very first time right now. And I got I can't I can't imagine three more legionist gang's dudes walking this fucking planet. Absolutely. I just want to mention for the record the Edgar Allen Poe guy has gotten me everything tonight. These other interns are sitting on the fucking ass. He's out. He's out. Poe was out. Poe was out like 10 episodes ago.
But Paul has been showing up every week and kicking ass and taking names here anyway. -It's the best one. -Yeah, it was great. [ Applause ] -Paul is on it. -Speaking of Po, we should get a little bell for Po. [ Laughter ] -I feel like that's the most appropriate thing. -Oh, speaking of -- Speaking of Po, this is an unpaid internship. -Po. -Beam Po. -You're gonna be Po. -You're gonna be Po. You're still gonna be Po. -Damn, cerebral Po, you should have released half laughter to that. -I'll be deducted from your overall score. -Yes. -You call him cerebral Po. All right, so I guess we can talk about this while we're getting them set up for the line of tenure, 'cause they have to do their pre-set up questions. So G-Mike, what's the order we're gonna put them in? Okay, so you know what, first up, we'll do cerebral Po. cerebral Po, get up there, buddy. Go over to G-Mike right now. You're gonna get up for cerebral Po. Who is the -- [ Cheers and applause ] -I think the fan favorite right now. -Not in the hip hop. -I mean, he dropped his tanger, Sam. -Help him! -No, it's like a Willy Wonka thing. The king gets stuck in the ground, and then he takes two sounds and does a cartwheel. -Oh, this pulsing bastard. -Well, that's his intake. -Oh, boy. -Oh, what are you getting sick? -No, he's making me sneeze, he's joints. -Oh, yeah. -Oh, the sneezers, yeah, they do that. -You got lady lungs now. -Something with your lungs. -You have a pussy now. -And this is the pussy. -Can I -- I don't want to ask an intensive question, but is this just a physical thing or is, like, you know, does the brain match the chassis? -Uh, I just have fat legs. -Jesus shit, he's got it. -All right, he's a sleeper, bro. -Nothing else is wrong with him, dude. -He's a dented up Honda. -What kind of question was that? -He's a dented up Honda Odyssey with like a V8 in it. -Do you remember since you got my sleeper, bro? -He's a 10-second retard. -Yeah. -You should see this track time on this motherfucker. -Did you guys have that video, James, talking about Alex? -Tim, ever since you got Mike Tyson teeth, you've been totally deaf. -What are you talking about? -Me? -He's where I get from Joe Rogan, by the way. -He punched your teeth out. -Yeah, Joe Rogan gave me three gold teeth. Poverse on Holy Ghost, then speaking through my comedy. -Yes. -Alex, do you have the video, James, talking about? -Okay, well, you know, we got to time these things properly, guys. I got to be honest with you, it's fucking-- -Fuck, it's just getting more of a philosophical question. -Why? -Why? I just want to get some talk about the story, because we don't know the video anyway. So, yeah, this guy jumps to death mid-flightly. We have a 22-year-old to fly the plan alone. Before jumping, you told the student, you know what you have to do. Carry on. -Do you see a guy jump out with that appearance? You don't have an airplane. He's got it. -That's cool as hell. -That's going to be jarring, for sure. You expect him to go, like, 30 feet and then just start flying right beside him. -There's got to be a 20-second trick. All right, what's the trick? Oh, this guy was hot, fuck. -He's a handsome guy, dude. -That's the guy who jumped. If I was that handsome, I would never kill myself. It could always get better, I would say. -Probably has an impossibly small cock. -No way, dude. -Maybe. -Only way he would do it. -You know, micro-penis. -Did they find his moisture as he, like, maybe there's a tree? Maybe he fucking ramboed it. Maybe he fucking first blooded it. -He's sticking out of a field. -Go down a little bit. Berterzo, Berterzo, then unbuckled his seat, moved down, removed his headset and opened the plane door and jumped out. -You said, "I can barely hear out of this headset." [ Laughter ] [ Cheers and applause ] -How about $3,000? I make it. [ Laughter ] -Razaria, who has a private pilot's license, a letter to officials at the Flying Parrot Flight School in Cordoba to the mid-air tragedy. -It was a guy at their emergency protocols. -Oh, so this was like a flight school. -I was imagining a big giant commercial jet. -No, no, no, no. -So when jumped out of a Delta, you thought they did it. -No, no, no. This was like a private lesson, flight lesson, and the guy was like, "You know enough now. I'm killing myself." -I don't know why I imagined literally him getting out, having to turn that whole thing. [ Laughter ] -He just gets sucked out of the plane. [ Laughter ] -He goes. -Anyway, guys, the current machine's broken. [ Laughter ] -I don't know what I'm doing, man. -You're seeing the curvature of the Earth at 30,000 feet. -All right, that's exactly what I'm saying. -Hey, guys. Let's go. Just got kicked out of the World Cup. -Do you think he purposely made a flight joke before he died? -Oh. -You're gonna have to carry on? [ Laughter ] I was good. First time, guys. And I was good. I like the pilot. -He goes. "And then he told me I had to carry." "Oh, now I get it. Pretty good, teach." -I assume he was a standing deliverance to style teacher of flight schools. He taught misguided, young, Hispanic youth. -I mean, while he -- -You're gonna kill yourself. -He's backwards of the pilot. [ Laughter ] -You're low-riding. -Yeah. -All right, guys. I'm gonna talk to you about flying right now. -You have a fly playing with rims, player? -As I walk through the valley of the shadow. -This guy was a fucking asshole. He could've easily just done this by himself. But he's like, "I'm gonna scare the shit out of the fucking flight student." -Well, no. -Here's a thing. -Wasn't it a girl? -Now you heard me. -Possibly heard of the people if the plane fucking tanks in a place where there's popular. -Oh. -He was like, "I want to get up there, and then I'm out." -He's being thoughtful. -He's like, "I talk you enough. You could land this." -That's how all flight school ends. -Yeah. -I mean, you can also just. -There can only be so many pilots. -The guys that did 9/11. -Yeah, it's like Jedi and Padoon. -Padoon. -Yeah. -Now they're a flight instructor. -All the guys who did 9/11 took flight lessons. At some point, they landed with an instructor, and they were like, "Huh? You did it." And he was like, "Excelerating." This is the most amazing feeling I've ever felt. Let me take you to our backs. -It had to be pretty exhilarating to fly a plane into the World's Rit Center. -No, but they learned how to fly. -No, I know. I'm saying like that moment. -I heard they didn't land. -Because when you crash the plane, you're going to literally immediately just. Like, how quick? Like, you're two seconds of pain. -You like to think. -Do you think you'd see the inside of one office before you die? -Somebody thinks. -Yeah. -The last thing you see is a cat saying, hang in there, holding on to a thing. I hate Mondays. -It was Italian in the food court today. -It's a fat lady blowing at her birthday candles. -I mean, there's a person who was like at that window that was like, "Oh, shit." -That thing's coming in pretty hot. -I think it's coming in pretty hot. -Pull up. -Yeah. -All right, that's actually getting weirdly close. -There's a guy in one window who's actually turned around going, "Guys, you're not going to believe this." -There's a guy. -You can still get a picture of me. -There's a people literally watching out their window like they're for the first to be impacted. There's people that are like three offices down that have no idea. -There were some people that were like, "I'm going to die in 30 seconds." -For sure, yeah. -Do you think there's one guy in a basketball uniform trying to break its ankles? -I'm actually trying to parry a plane. -I would have went to the roof. -I would have went to the roof and tried to silver surf it down, man. -You would have tried to ride the building as a collapse? -Yeah. -I would have been on the roof falling down with it, and I would have jumped at the last second. -Right. -That's the last of it. -There was one person down. -That's my mobile update. -When you get to the bottom of the rubble, fucking tumble saws out of it. -For sure. -One person was sitting there going, "Where are all the Jews today?" -That's crazy. Usually they had a kosher option at breakfast, but just everyone skipped it today. -I don't add a complaint in the box today. -I don't need to wear a jacket into work. It's like a nice temperature in here. No one's complaining about it. -So also what we're doing today for the Spring Journal Olympics is, we're doing a light attack, we're kicking off the biggest liar right away. And then the finals are going to be in honor of Crackery Amico, is the finals, or we are having a rap battle between the final two competitors. 16-bar rap battle. -The side of my complaint goes, "Do you call him Crackery Amico?" -I did, I did. -Is that his full name? -Yes. -Crackery Amico. -Don't forget the jacket. -Did you call him Crackery Amico? -It's his full name. -He's full name. -Crackery Amico. -Yeah, but that's fucking box. You're right, Jay. That guy wasn't jumping out to fuck that guy. He was jumping out because somebody needed to land the plane. -He's like bringing that plane back. -It's expensive. -Just fucking slice your wrist, dude. Jesus Christ. -I think that just goes nose down with the plane. That's pretty dope. -He probably respected the craft. You know what I mean? Didn't want to damage anything. -Didn't he respect it? -He wanted an honorable pilot suicide. -Oh, yeah, the squirrel nasty landed it. -It's actually the nicest guy ever. He's like, "I don't want to destroy the property. I don't want to hurt anybody. I want to light just, dude. What a hero." -I found out today exactly why you never go to a female barber to get your haircut. I didn't go to her, but she is in the chair next to me where I get my haircut always. And when she went on her break, the guy who cuts my hair goes, "I feel bad for her, dude." There's a boyfriend just cheated on her. She found out. And in the worst way, the other girl's four months pregnant. -No. -And I was like, "Yo, if I was getting in her fucking chair to get my haircut today." [ Laughter ] -I don't know. Whatever you think, huh? Just make me look manly. She just cuts off your ear. -Yeah. -So I mean, that would be so fucking terrible. -So what are you going for today, cheating fucking pig?
line son of a bitch. Oh, I know a piece of shit who has that haircut too. Sure, I'll do it for you. Fucking asshole. All right, guys, let's take a quick moment and thank Body Brain Coffee for supporting the show. Body Brain Coffee is premium freeze-ride Colombian coffee blended with the tropics and adaptogens that will make you feel absolutely great. You don't have to think about your vitamins and about your pills every morning. You drink a cup of coffee and it'll naturally support your testosterone, your brain function, your mood and energy. Genuinely great, better than an energy drink. Better as a pre-worked out. You can drink it hot. You can drink it cold. You're putting it in a protein shake. You can put it in your butt, Jay. I do. I know you do. I do. It's part of my shower routine at this point. Yeah. Yeah, I've learned, I used to use a funnel, but now I've learned to just kind of like put a pile on top of my asshole and I can kind of like accept it. Yeah. If you relax yourself enough, it just kind of just, it's almost like I do some of my throat almost to make it happen. And well, but it gets it, either, it gets in there either way, and I'll tell you what I'm cranking 315 for reps. Pretty sick, dude. Look, buy to drink coffee.com is a website. Use the promo code LOS 20, save 20% and if you subscribe, you're going to get 20% off and free shipping for life. Pretty cool. Buy to bring coffee.com. All right, folks, let's take a quick moment. I think brunt workwear for supporting the show. Thank you. Brunt workwear. Tough enough for any jobs like, but keeping it comfortable all day long, the most comfortable work boots you're ever going to have. You don't have to break them in or anything. The right out of the box, the best work boots ever. I have two pair. I get my son a pair. Jay, you were your brunt workbooks all the time. We're not working guys. We just like to look cool. Yeah. LOS got two pair, one for construction, one for hate crimes. 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You gotta tell everybody how much it's been raining pussy on you since you've been blinged out with this shit. Absolutely, I've been iced out around the neck and pussy is falling from trees. It's amazing, dude. You look like Mr. T. There's real gold in every piece in the hands of sons and you can see and feel the difference. Honestly, Tristan, I mean, honestly, when you put this on, I'm watching women just throw themselves at you. It's crazy. I know I almost tore an ACL. Loan went full speed at my knees to try to get my penis. Yeah, they're larger women, but still, they're baddies. They got a lifetime warranty, so you'll have it forever. And they have a custom shop as well, so you can customize your own jewelry. If you've ever wanted to be a jewelry maker, oh my god. Well, you know, somewhere in my family, there was one. For a limited time, new customers are going to get an insane deal. If you use code skanks, you're going to get 40% off at GLD.com. That's 40% off with code skanks at GLD.com. After you purchase, they're going to ask you where you heard about it. I'm living in the Legion of Skanks, sent you one more time that's code skanks for 40% off at GLD.com. All right, let's go back into it. Are we ready for questions for cerebral pals? 20 seconds for cerebral pals. One more half for cerebral pals. Come on, give me some more. 20 seconds of love. 15 more seconds of love, please. This is going to be so good. Do you want to go first, Lewis? Sure, it doesn't matter. Whenever they're ready. What are you going to do this one? Whatever you think, my friend? Are we ready? Yeah, we're ready. We're ready. All right. Are we ready? Let's see. All right, cerebral pals. Yes. If no one would ever find out about it, would you have sex with a 17-year-old girl? No. Good answer. He wants to tell everybody. Yeah, he wants everyone to find out about it. May the Lord be with you. I have to give it a second to tabulate me. Yeah, so this is an FBI level lie detector test. G mic had you go to literally weeks of training in order to administer the test. This is a real deal, guys. So, and it's come, it comes back pretty good every time. Are we good? Do you like? Good. Okay, I'll go next. Cerval Paul. Yes. Do you think there's any chance in God's green earth you could fulfill any duties we will require as an intern? No. I appreciate his honesty. Oh, with that tabulate. We've done this. You guys have never done a lie. Nobody here has done a lie detector, right? We're going to get you on the next time you guys are on, we're going to terrify. If we had more time, we'd fucking terrify. Yes. You done it? Yeah, we all did it. So, here's the thing. On this show, if we're going to put people through it, we do it. So, the lie detector, the choke collar, the electric collar, everything. I've done it all. I've done it all. But they have for the show. Yeah, they represent the show. We're ready for our third question. Trust the only person who I see how to my balls. I did that for the show. That is true. Oh, it's my turn. Yeah. God. It's hard to figure out which one. We can make one up on the spot. Me and Jay did. Yeah, there's so much fucking pressure, guys. Can I please? Please, that, please, that. Have you ever used your condition to try and get sympathy pussy? No. Look at that. No, he's gay. Will you now? No, no, no. Don't confuse the machine. No, can't. His name's Paul. Yeah, lie detector test. It's a lot of pressure. It is. Yeah, scary. No matter what. It's like taking an AIDS test. You know, you don't have age. You're like, maybe I did that on the show as well. We did eight tests on the show. Tim Dylan refused an AIDS test on the show once. Pretty funny. That was great. I think we've done it twice. No, we did. We did one what Mark Norman. And we did one where we were like, pretty sure we had AIDS. I was never worried about it. But I was supposed to do it every month. An AIDS test? Yeah, the way they're fucking guys. I mean, I do exclusively have sex with men with AIDS. It is true, dude. I'm still cruising strawberry fields over in Central Park. Is that how you get AIDS? Yeah. By having sex with men with AIDS? I mean, that'll help. Yeah, dude. Well, I mean, I dropped out of college, but yeah, I think, I think people with AIDS having sex in your ass. Question number four. I got one. Go ahead. Cerebral Paul. Yes. If hurting gas digital somehow fixed your crazy body, would you do it? No. Wow. If that, I mean, if that's what we're talking, you have a brain injury if you, that is the truth. Yeah. You should take us down to fix your body. Are you doing mine? I might hurt gas digital to fix your body. That's not bad. I feel okay. Hang on. I'm thinking out loud here. How about I feel like Marine crawls around like a snake with like a tray of what we want on his back? He does look like he could be a good ottoman. He could be a good ottoman. He could be a great ottoman, cerebral ball. Thank you. He can. And I mean, that respectfully. He could be a paperweight. I mean, if we do a, if we do a show on the road and we go to like a casino, we could park fucking crazy clothes. So I'm a Paul. Do you have like a handicap thing? Like a, yes, a handicap parking. Yes, I have. So whatever, what's happened to your drive? I'm not sure because my dad uses it when I get my car. It's a big custom van. I don't know. Beeps when I go slowly into it. It's smaller than the regular school buses, but I think it's a Subaru, but I don't know which type. You die. Nice. Nice. One more question. Yeah. Is anybody have anything to make good good kids? He's been good. We got to, we could always do this. That's all such. It is funny. Last but not least, cerebral ball. Yes. Do you think you're funnier than Mike Feeney? No one's funnier than Mike Feeney. That'll be a yes or no answer. No, just saying no. You say no. Yeah. No. Okay. All right, cerebral ball. Give it up for him. He's gonna stay there. They're gonna tabulate the edges. It takes just a couple minutes. In the meantime, you know, why don't we do some plugs real quick while we're getting cerebral balls answers? Zach, what do you plug in there? Oh, somebody else has to go into the chairs. Oh, just uh, it's
- These scrims, Zach, is not slimy. Punch up that live slash Zac Amico. And I got my half an hour coming out next month. - Yeah. - Or so here I am, yes. (audience applauds) - Tim Butterley. September 10th, 11th and 12th. I'll be in Baton Rouge, Lafayette and Lake Charles. I don't know where Lake Charles is. It's in one of those states around there. October 1st, 2nd, 3rd, Gainesville, St. Augustine and Sanford, Florida. And October 8th and 10th will be in Toronto at Tim Butterley.com tickets and schedule. Also, my debut YouTube stand-up comedy special guest digital presents 30 minutes with Tim Butterley. He is coming. (audience applauds) - One second? - Okay. - Second and the third week of August. - The second or third week of August. - I will have a date in the next few days. - Okay, I was thought I was going to have a date. Sorry, that was kind of anti-climactic, but subscribe to my YouTube channel. - No, you don't want to hold the seat when it comes out. - I'll just fucking, you know, - Is there a chance that we can announce the date? - Yes, we can announce it right now. - Right now. - Yes. - We'll fucking make it. - Yesterday. - Oh fuck, I was so happy to be asked. Lewis, thank you so much. - We'll say, why don't we do Tuesday, August 18th? - Tuesday, August 18th, the debut of my first day of YouTube comedy specials. Only on the Tim Butterley YouTube channel. - Yeah, you and Zach both, I mean, you guys can't, same night fucking absolutely murdered. We're opening up the, the specials with you and then Zach and me goes the second week. So you guys are fucking incredible. - Oh, amazing, they might. - Tim Butterley. Tim Butterley wore no shirt and a fucking far vest on his specials. Pretty crazy dudes, pretty crazy. - Check them out, go. - Yeah, check out my music. YouTube.com/crackamico got merch. It's very nice. Top banana USA.com/crack. Check that out, patreon.com/crackamico. Follow me @crackamicowrap. Let's crackamico, R-A-P on IG and Twitter. And most importantly, July 17th and 18th, right here at the stand, rich boss will be performing it. (audience applauds) - I fucked up at the end. - Sure. - Yeah, rich boss, really good at it. - Tristan Bowling. - You can see me September 4th. - Oh, for the last time. - I know, I'm in the fucking years. - Last time, fucking brutal. Well, if you wanna see me in person and bring me flowers 'cause I will still be in mourning. September 3rd, I will be doing the comedy cabin in Wisconsin. And also, I'll be headlining September 11th at the Catechomes Cabaret in West Toronto, or just Toronto. It's gonna be fun. 9/11, come escape New York and visit me with Canada. - Hell yeah, Tristan Bowling. - Also, Po, bring me a dream. Or did he turn into a Raven? (audience applauds) - He may have. He turned into a Raven. - He may have been walled up inside of a castle. - Big J? - Oh, bigjacomity.com. For all my dates, I'm all over the fucking place. This weekend, I'm gonna be at, though, oh, Winnipeg. Yeah, the great outdoors festival. I think I'm doing Dr. Phil Live, and then some showcase out there. I'll be a governor's long aisle in Richmond, Virginia. Hey, coming back to that funny bone. Mark Ridley's comedy cast on So Much More. It never fucking ends. The greatest yapper alive tour happening right now. Listen to the bonfire, five days a week, "Fection Talk" Series 6 and 103 with me and the great Robert Kelly. And of course, story wars right here on the gas station on that work. And then also, watch the Kevin Hartrose. It's still on Netflix. Damn, I got rid of it yet. Go enjoy that. And you follow my YouTube and all that shit, too. I live streaming. Every gallon again. - Come see me live, guys. Rotterly this tour. Next up, July 24th, 25th, I'll be in Denver, Colorado. A comedy works south. Very excited about that. Right after that, I'm gonna be in Lafayette, Louisiana. Late Charles, Louisiana. Right after that, me and Tim Butterley. We're doing the same little run there. Fort Waterdale, Florida at the comedy bar. Empire comedy club Portland, Maine. Vent Coover as well. I'm doing in October. A lot of other stuff, guys. Go to Lewisofskanks.com. Subscribe to my mailing list. So you get inside information about all the things that are happening at gas digital and skank fest in my entire universe. Go by my book, knives and spoons. And if you love this show, subscribe to gastas.com. We do a bonus show every Friday night. Just for subscribers. So the only way to get that bonus show is to subscribe. And we have an underman library, over 900 episodes, all uncensored, all ad-free. All in one place, you get access to the racist live chat. And many other member benefits. Go to gastas.com, download the apps. Use that promo code LOS, save a couple bucks a month. And, uh, yeah, support the show. Support the show. Interest, and we love you. Thank you. We're gonna miss you, dude. I know. All the bigger and better things. Bigger and better things. Uh, G-Miker, you, uh, do you have your results over there? G-Miker, not you, guys. You have the results. Great. Okay. Run through 'em. Cerebral Paul. You're on note. Do we want to get a camera on Cerebral Paul while we do this? We can do that, yeah. Yeah, I think we should get a camera on Cerebral Paul. Thanks. Good job, Poe. Oh, Poe reappeared? Yeah, Poe just jumps right in. God bless you. Alright, Cerebral Paul, five questions, lie detector. Remember, the biggest liar is going home, uh, right away. We're gonna find out who our Spring Turn Olympian is tonight. Question number one. Also, we didn't do the intro for the lie detector. We're good. Sorry. I thought we'd go through all the questions and then go through all the answers. Is that what we're doing? Okay. That's fine. Oh, you know what? I'm so sorry. I didn't realize we were doing that. I apologize. That's fine. Thank you, Alex. Good job stepping up. Good job. Good job, Tommy. Cool. Cool. You are dead backstage. You crazy asshole. You just fuck with the wrong bull. Get out of here. Kudos. Good. Way to produce. Oh, you are dead. I do not like all the girl power that just came with her. I watch all the women being like, yeah, you go, girl. Someone finally fucking told Lewis Jacob. That's what's what? Yeah. We're gonna fucking literally beat your ass backstage. Alex, we're going to be fucked up physically. We're going to jump you. You're so fucked up. Tell your daughter what her friend's daddy's done. Okay. This fucking guy. Okay. This fucking guy. So they're giving him the, uh, what's your call questions? Yeah. What are the questions that they have for his ready? It depends how many it takes because he's a shaky asshole. Do we, do we have the video of the guy, the comedian? This is wild. What is going on upstairs? It's a real hoot and hollering party. Oh, I think it's like one of those like all female orgasm parties. Or the others like yell for like a wicking something. Nobody touches these other. No one touches each other. Yeah, it's all like raky. Yeah, raky. It's like raky comes. And everyone's clits are fucking like big. Like they've been rubbed too much. Dude, imagine going to a raky rub and talk. You're like, "Just fucking touch it, you bitch." Oh my god. If some fucking Asian chick treat my dick like a fucking, a rage ball. If a bitch is, if a bitch is water bending around my penis, I'd be so, I'd be so frustrated. Like, please, he's just fucking touching. Yeah, but I've been after a long time. The second she did touch it, you come. Oh, yeah, dude. Oh, yeah. Just explode all over the place. You look up raky porn, don't you? I look up raky porn. But you have to call it unconsensual. Unconsensual content. Thank you, sir. I appreciate it. I'll never forget that. You're gonna touch it on my arm now. I didn't realize you were just tricking him and telling you what to look up. Because you can't find it anymore. No, so a lot of people sent me that to you. I'm like, dude, it's called unconsensual content. You can find it. Because I thought it was gone off the internet. You play out in the world on social media. Man, I miss rape porn. No, I put it out on a podcast. People were like fucking like, "Hey man, I'd still out there." I said that I miss-- You gotta play the game a little bit if you wanna find it. I just want to know why you wanna throw it under the roster. I don't. Where's my camera? Oh, wow, you're so moral. As you jerk off to women shitting on camera. Never jerk off that one. Just go see a fucking piece of shit. I never jerked off that one. It's my life. I take it in. I take it in. You watch it. It's fucking bizarre. It's bizarre that you jerk off to it. I watch the same way I watch it be heading, dude, like this. Oh. You jerk off? Man, it's to be. But I'll finish to it. I finished the regular stuff with Dixon Bajayas. You see what I mean? I'll say, you're immediately officially boot off. Turn it up like you're turning the volume up. Because Spadels and Objects don't. Oh. No, you gotta--you gotta turn the volume up. Black indie sounds like Black Indiana Jones. Yeah, this belongs in a museum issue. His name is like-- It had to be motherfucking snakes. His name's like-- Oh, man, it's dogs. I don't fuck with dogs, bro. His name's like Cartlin fucking browners at some-- Cartlin funny TV. Cartlin funny TV. Why can't we get volume? Oh, it's find a different one, though. What it does, have to think. What is it just booing? No, it's like, but you hear the-- The bottle whizzes. It hits like next to his fucking face on the wall. And it was because, yeah, he said, like, you're wearing the clothes of your dead homie. I mean, I don't know what led up to that. No one-- I was about to see if there was any kind of like follow-up like a talk about what happened other than they just keep showing this video. Why do you hate hand me down so much? He's dead, he's not using it. What the fuck, dude? Yeah, so he definitely had a dead homie and I really hit. And he was definitely wearing his fucking pants. No shit, for sure. But I couldn't guess why the crowd-- Probably had his face. His face was airbrush on them. I'll tell you what, when they were just throwing things, I thought it was a forced, like, you know, like, make a video of, like, people, because they're throwing, like, it looks like they're throwing lettuce at him. At least they planted a guy to throw a bottle out of it. But the bottle, dude, dings him right by the face. It's crazy how close it comes to hitting him. Fuck off!
[LAUGHTER] To that bottle, fucking, I mean, it hits them probably on the recoil. [INAUDIBLE] Fuck y'all. Oh, shit. That was crazy. All because he ran the line. By the way, just the slowest thing is, you know what? I'm just going to go. Oh, shit. Thank God, the city got a door. I will tell you this. In the enapolis, helium is a club by play. I love that club. It's a great club. But one time I was hanging out at the front bar for a while, and we left. In the corner, the corner that that club is on is where the Hood meets a frat guys. It's a strange little fucking area there. And there's always problems. And when we were me, Dylan, and Mike Fenoy were walking home. A guy got shot just in the middle of the-- Also, Dylan is where the Hood meets frat guys. [LAUGHTER] No doubt. So he fell right at home. Yeah, he was fine. He was like, let's hang out here, dude. I know the guy who killed this guy. But yeah, there was a guy on the ground fucking shot, and we ran back into the club for like 20 minutes, and they let us go. But it's a wild place. So I guess it's not that great. But I guess a black show within the enapolis maybe could be this rowdy. But I can't think of the last time I've seen an audience collectively throw shit at somebody. That's wild. Well, you-- I mean, you're the black show's expert in the room. I've had things strongly-- What could you say to get the crowd going like that? If you accuse me-- Happy Father's Day. I know one specific word that I don't think they'll love. But I might get respect from it. Hey, guys. Be honest with me, is this a funny bit? Someone told me they were in a traffic thing. And a guy who had a thing on his car that said he was deaf, like, cut them off. And she was like, you know, pissed off. And she was like, I go, can you-- I go, why don't you curse them out in sign language? She goes, I only know ER in sign language. And I went, perfect. [LAUGHTER] Also, you can just flip a black deaf guy. You can flip them off. That's fuck you anyway. All right, gimmick is ready. All right, gimmick, I'll start with you. All right, let's go. A big guy, alpha guy, gimmick. Have you ever done anything gay? Yeah. [APPLAUSE] Oh, Zach, fine for a while. I mean, we know that's truth. What did you do that was gay while we're waiting for it to reset? I mean, I bought an article sound system t-shirt and bought a ticket. So that's pretty gay, right? No, that's not what you meant. You fucking-- We were looking for, like, you joking, you know what I'm saying? No, I mean, let's do the second question. Yes, sorry. Jim, during his baseline questions, one of the questions was, have you enjoyed the company of a man? And he said, yes. Wow. [LAUGHTER] We wasted one. [LAUGHTER] It's guys big gay. Yeah, dudes are great to hang out with. What's wrong with that? We're going to hang out with broads on me. Get a beer, feel their shoulders. Yeah. I enjoy the company of lots of people, my god. Yeah, here a good story. We're good to go again. Go out with somebody who knows what they want for dinner? We're ready for question number two. Go ahead, Lewis. Lay it on him. OK. All right, fine. By gay, we mean, have you ever done anything sexual with a man? Yeah, had some bad uncles. What? Jesus Christ. Let me know when-- let me know when we get to the fucking next one. This cop suckers making me pissed off. [LAUGHTER] Oh, man, he's making me get specific. We're all getting to the bottom of one thing here. I got it, though. I got the wording. We're going to get you, dude. We're going to get you for what you did in that locker room. Your prints are all over this thing, man. You can give us the fucking sad, sick, bad story. My uncle was handsy. We're going to find out what you didn't have to-- Jason. Uncle. Yeah, yeah, man, dude. That means word got around, oh, yeah. This kid is dumb watertight. It goes, yo, fucking little gimmick has the bottom of his throat. [LAUGHTER] Shut up, dude. I'm your brother. I wouldn't lie to you. We're going to question number three. Stacey's kid is hot to trot. Have you ever done anything sexual with a man because you wanted to? [LAUGHTER] Yeah. [LAUGHTER] What a pussy. What a problem. Dude, there's only two questions. People know how gay you are. [LAUGHTER] Tristan, I wanted to get out of the basement. I hadn't. Tristan, you were asking if he loved it. [LAUGHTER] Or was it consensual and non-consensual? Oh, fuck me. That's good. Damn it. Gimmick, mate. This is good. That's a good-- god damn it. I'm having a good time. Neutral? Where do you go to now? What's the pivot? Well, I think we know the next question. This is good. And G-Mike gives the signal. Ready? All right. Gimmick, do you like Big J more than me? Come on, dude. This is an easy one. Wow. You're a piece of shit. Oh, I hope you get through to the next round. I've got what people call an X-Factor. I bet if you showed me 10 Skanks fans, I could pick out which ones were J guys and which ones were Melissa guys. Usually the guys with the chains. Sarah Boyles is a Lewis guy. I can tell you a lot about it. They're going through the room. Go through the room, and it'll see if we're right. Nobody answer right away. Lewis guy has no idea what the show is. Big J guy, Lewis guy. This is Lewis's neighbor. Don't count him. I know this guy personally, my family hangs out with his and they create art together. Yeah, he's a big J guy, though. [LAUGHTER] I'd love if he's a big J guy. We're ready for it. So excited. It's wondering where Dave is. You got so excited that another fucking school plate that knows big J. We have one more question. That's a good one. No? No, I don't know. It's got to be a more fun one. Since you do gay stuff now, would you ever go back to one of the uncles? No, we don't have to. That's a waste of a guy being a question. We all know it's just fucking Chris. OK. Let me know when we're ready. Have you ever been happy to make another man ejaculate? That's crazy. Why do I get all these questions? Because the first thing was so gay. Longer than a no. You could just lie to once and be done with it. Unfortunately, you steered into the curve, my friend. You could have lied once earlier, but nope. And I'll be fine. I'll be fine. Yeah. Oh, he said, yes, quietly. He quietly has made men ejaculate. That is so fucking crazy, dude. And he stoked on it. Dude, that's crazy. That's a big gay guy. Totally gay, man. So one thing they all got in common, yeah. And all fairness, Jay does give off Uncle Vibes. Actually, the guy that did it was named Uncle Vibes. It related to Uncle laser, of course. Don't worry, Jimmy. When your parents fall asleep, I'll come in your room. Well, that was that, right? One more time for gimmick, guys. Give it a big round of applause. [APPLAUSE] Damn. What? I was an expecting him to have made a man ejaculate. Come on. He's the stuff that we're finding out about him. You're trying to read his mood right now. He's missing the visible teeth, which means, you know, you want drugs at some point. You got to do what you got to do. Damn, dude. Was it for drugs or pleasure? It was for pleasure, you know, mama. It wasn't for drugs. You don't give him that out. Damn it. We don't have another question. It was for drugs pleasure. It was the pleasure of doing drugs. By the way, it's been a pleasure doing drugs. Do you mind if I make you come? I'm very excited about this. You don't really watch the taste of fucking cock out of your mouth? Drugs. We didn't find out if it was with his hand, with his mouth, with his butt. I can get 30 more questions out of this with the camera. I'll just give you a hole on the podcast. Just be a spinoff. We just let it take to get me about all the gays shitties. That's gimmick-centric story. What's happening right now? Story wars, Uncle Edition. Yeah, gimmick. You have no idea how much you just made Louis J. Gomez feel not so alone in the world. He's laughing at you, but he's also going like, "Oh, God, someone else has his experience." Oh, touchy T.O. I'm not allowed. I'm not allowed in the world. I'm not allowed. For the first time in my life, I feel hogged and braced. No, I'm not gay. We figured it out. Don't trick me with his lie detector and to believe me on this day. You're a lie. Do you not know this Tim Butterley? This is so funny. Do you remember the story? Dave Smith. Dave Smith. Now these way long gone is a raging faggot for how he handled this. He's a fucking poon. Why? I'll tell you exactly why, because we just told a- So we did the lie detector test. They told the producers preemptively that we're going to ask me if he thinks he might possibly be by. We'll be by.
But they said make sure you tell him no matter what that he's lying when he says no So they did this on the show they told me no and it really got in my head At the point where Lewis told us he goes I Think I'm starting to look at like Like pictures of like It was like trans or whatever was you were like I was start to think like maybe Maybe I could maybe that's it. Oh, that was the joke I know you were joking all to me, but you were just the thing like you really might be like in my buy like why would Why would a lot of that there's been so on point accurate really accurate It's been it's been on it's been on determined It's been undetermined when you answer a question where you're like, I don't like if you if that happens Yeah, I mean you yeah, I was there You mentioned how like you went to a play of James recently and you really connected with one of the kids friends dad And my ring is I don't know which kid he was talking to you. What did you see this guy? What if me and this guy were fucking each other And this thing that nobody knew with me and this me and baby James After the play we kiss in the parking lot just fucking jerked each other off that's a classic fucking North Jersey story my man Being nose-to-nose whispering yeah back and forth to each other. Yeah, yeah, we can't look at each other when we see each other in the wall Yeah, so comedy So they tell me that I'm but essentially they so now where days are going by where I'm like really in my head and Was like that dude don't it's a fucking little thing No, we're like, but it's been it was like it was weirdly right about a lot of shit. It was like weirdly on point Because we all three of us did it. We're like so I don't know but you know whatever and we kind of just let it go good. We let Lewis Unravel in his own mind. Yeah, and he was and then Dave Like when Lewis started going and he's like dude, I can't I don't know why that thing said Dave was just like dude We were just fucking with you off Camera off micro it was fucking insane. What a boom dude all-time blunder for sure. All right all-time fucking blunder fuck you, Dave If it he was such a terrible guest I don't know why we even had that guy on he's just politics Political last day. Are we ready over there? Two more minutes nut sack right here nut sack will not tell a lie. I'll tell you this much nut sack at the very least He's an honest person Nutsack goes into standby mode when you're not directly addressing him by the way Noises going on His wife knows that she's look she's really nodding are you a wife or girlfriend? You're girlfriend, okay, but I mean yeah, she's no she was nodding her head like oh this dude shuts off at some point I just watched it happen He was going like you have it on camera already. He's going like this And then I said nut sack anyway He was looking into the I was about to say the best look back in that moment. He's got enraps your dude at the bottom of the pool, dude I just feel sink and man. I just feel sink and You've best went back to his friends. It's like I got a fucking doughnut out there looking at me Look at his retouching glass. I'm looking at my ass Fucking nuts. I'm not saying that's how nut sack has gone above and beyond here's a nut sack Maybe the most annoying out of everybody in terms of like presence and being around and having to talk to him But I will say he's gone above and beyond. I mean well be like he fucking wants it really badly And he's he's killed it That's x fucking he's in top three couple people are going in right now This is that by the way, this is the best spring tunnel in things we've ever done. Bye. Bye. Bye Thank God we had no hot chicks to make it all pussy-ish. Yeah, we had one we had one chick that was bald What was her name? Thud? No, I caught her in yuck. Yeah Why you so good in a great name for her? Yeah, that would have worked. That would have been great, but yuck was good We thought with somebody else to be have a thud of course. Yeah years ago Thud one you dated her for two weeks But her call you least a car in your name. You don't remember this. That's crazy He goes, dude, you spoke too much pot man. You put a city bank account with him. You guys had a threesome with a guy You don't remember this dude. You have an LLC with her You guys started a fucking online muffin business. What are you retarded? All right, we're good ready. All right, the first one fucking lay it on him, dude. All right, so You were scratching your back. Oh, oh shit Mike. Please no jerky movement Mike never actually finished Lie detector school as instructor killed himself He goes and then you just you know you put it in the info and you wait for the results. Got it. Anyway, I'm gonna check out He just jumps out of the plane. You're doing life detector school in Okay, last question. You think I'm gonna do this Yeah, do you think I can recover from this? They actually lived because they were in the second floor of a strip all New Jersey, so Zach you watch send help. No. Oh good car. Good airplane crash. Okay. Did you watch evil did burn not yet great? Hey, you know what either of those would have been a great thing to send them on a tangent about for sure Yeah, that was it. You know, you're too solid rise. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Did you watch obsession? Yeah, although, uh, no, but although I saw I brought Bobby Kelly to the sea evil day, which was on purpose because it's like bringing it's like without having to bring a black woman I'm bringing a black woman He jumped up. He threatened to leave several times He walked in circles like a dog before it rains same silhouette Dude, it was he and I also got his pdx seats the 4d seats, so he was jerking around. It was oh my god so much popcorn on the floor We're ready. These are some bad out of life people Damon's dude my sister used to scam me with demons All right, baby, we are ready. Not sec is ready. All right ready Not that last week you drank some piss Sure at one point you were presented with the option of drinking saraphina's piss in fact and you noticeably smiled Not that the question is this Given the option would you rather drink saraphina's piss over your girlfriends? No All right, you know what though you just delayed a fight by about 10 minutes As a parting gift you guys get me a decanter of saraphina's piss with I've ran this question by a few people and it's like It's a fight that makes no sense, but it's a fucking fight You want to drink some other bitches piss? I don't want to drink any piss, you know, but if you had to drink piss You'd want the fucking young bitches piss fuck you. She has AIDS And now everyone thinks saraphina has AIDS. I mean here's a truth like it does it is just pissed the inside of the body It's no harder than like it's just but I've already paid saraphina to drink her piss So I'll just tell you this it's mostly water. She's a fit gal And if everyone on the staff we would all most likely drink saraphina's piss. That's not true It doesn't hold on. It doesn't make any sense because it is piss from the inside of a body. It's a matter with no GBM regardless It's going to blind you like moonshine Please don't here's the thing Lewis and you have to understand I think you'll agree with this I don't understand what I'm saying if you drink if someone goes here's a glass of saraphina's piss And you drank it down it's still going to be gross to it's not that you're going to be like this is you're going to be like But like it's you get it down if then someone went dude. That was all x-pissed Immediately it's mental You understand what I mean it's a mental game Must drink a lot of fego The switch the fucking misdirection you think it's peeled grapes, but it's actually real human eyeballs in the book It's the ultimate of time to kill Now picture she's white That may be almost put just thinking about it because I was picturing like drinking sarah's penis and you were like There's no way there's no way x-piss doesn't have head on it I'm like a freshly born man Lewis. I will agree with you that saraphina's piss is more of a summer shandy Now his is a fucking kid is dude you let that big set on you split the Sentiment at the bottom if you got a swirl it. It's a bottle fermented if it was actually be like man Seraphine is drink more water That's what a fucking chunks in it Stuff that doesn't digest like leafy letter Corn nibblets Okay, but think about drinking pass how much more appetizing is it if it was in a champagne flute as opposed to a plastic cup It's great point there
- I'm reminded of the chalice. - Go ahead. - Something a keen would drink piss out. - I'm right from the tap guy. (laughing) - Just draft? - Yeah. - Nutsack. Do you think that you could produce the show better than Alex? - The audio. - Oh, yes or no? - Yes, if we're talking audio. (audience cheering) - Wow. He's coming through. - I'm not that experienced with video. - Dude, Alex is gonna hit your girlfriend out. - Whatever. - All right, I probably have a lot more experience doing audio. - That's all. - Damn, dude. - Mom first the rug lady. - It's pretty crazy. - That's fucking wild. Yeah, well, he's probably not wrong. (laughing) - Nutsack, do you know your face does stuff when you're not talking? - Yeah. - Is that crazy? - I'm trying to, I'm trying to remain still and become. - He's very expressive. - Gee, Mike and Nutsack look like one of those videos where a guy takes his nonverbal brother to shop by himself for the first time. (laughing) - I think, I think they're about to challenge each other to a duel or they both fucking are bar tenders in 1915. - We're ready. God, do you have anyone you want to do, Tristan? - I defer. - Okay. - To who? Anybody have one they want to ask? - Oh, I'll ask. - Okay, go ahead. - Nutsack. - It's fucking face, man. (laughing) - Have you ever done anything gay for the purposes of sexual pleasure with a man? - Nah. Good answer. - I believe. - Great fucking answer, that's the answer. That's the type of answer that deserves to be a Legion of Stang's intern, unpaid. - All right, I got one. I got one. - Please, wait, you gotta wait until he's ready. - What the fuck happened to you? - I hold my sneezes. - Oh my God, it looks like you're about to fucking explode. - Oh, do they make you sneeze too? - I don't know, I just sneezed. - They make me sneeze. - Okay. Don't smoke 'em. - I think you guys are just sick. (laughing) - We must have that diarrhea disease that time. - I think it's time for another round of eight's tests. (laughing) We have been losing weird amounts of weight. - Fucking hell, hell yeah dude. - I have a question too. New requires club, please. We have two more questions, so. - Two more questions, so good, please, trust him. - You time ready Mike? - You've said you've never done anything gay. Would you do something gay to retain your internship here at Gast Israel? - Great question, Trace. - No. - Wow. - Doesn't want it. - Doesn't want it. - Doesn't want it. - You gotta want it more in the next go. - So maybe that was a lie. (cheering) Dude, Sarah McCall can't even feel his legs, dude. He would be a pincushion for cough. - He doesn't give a shit. Dude, whatever you want, I'm playing fucking Nintendo Switch up here. - He's got an apple in his mouth. We're just picking at him. - We have one more question. - Can you be trying to find that cane when we're done? (laughing) - He's just gonna spit it all the way through. We're cooking him like pastor. - We're gonna be well on cerebral palsy ass. You know what, Po? I did ask you for a diet coke and you never brought it. You're about to be right out of this contest. He's. - Hey, Po, I'll take another beverage as well, my friend. - I use Diet Coke as well, Po. - And I'll take one as well, Po. - And Po, not to be a motherfucker, but please, man. - Please, Po. - Just a Po boy from a Po family. (laughing) - That's not kinda love here. - Yeah, that was good to fuck it off. - Dude, if you just started singing bohemian rap city, I'd say, say, say, that'd be awesome. - Po, bohemian rap city? - We're ready? - Yeah, they do. - All right, final question, Greg Kamiko. - This is slightly similar to Tristan, so if we need to do a different one, just let me know. But, if it goes out of town, not sec. - Well, if he doesn't answer it. - If it meant winning the spring turn Olympics, would you break up with your girlfriend? - No, no, don't answer it. Don't answer it. This is gonna be no. Yes, it's gonna be no. - Dude, it could be a lie. - No, she funds it, no. (laughing) - Yeah, I assume she has an actual job. - Every time you ask nutsack a question, it looks like he's doing an impression of a Chinese guy. (laughing) - You understand? His girlfriend's parents hate him because she funds it with her job. (laughing) I was a general manager of a banana republic. Three stores. - I think we should ask another one. - Thank you. - That's great. - Whatever you need me to ask. - Um, I don't like that one, blah, blah, blah. That was good. - Oh, this is a good one that we should ask a couple. I'm glad we're asking somebody this. Did you use AI in any way to help with your rap tonight? - Um, I could say yes. (laughing) - Oh boy. - Well, let me explain. Let me explain. - Yes, there's no question, Seth. - There's no question. We don't want your explanation. - The list that was looking up stuff on her phone and kinda like, but I didn't take any direct lines from that fucking thing. So quit your fucking, we don't believe you. We also don't believe that that was your real piss in the cup the other day. - That wasn't even your piss. - Are you just full of rugs and what? (laughing) - One more time for The Great Nutsack. That was it, right? (audience cheering) The Great Nutsack. We're having a great show here today. What an amazing experience over here. You guys have a good time here tonight, guys. The last shot for Tristan Bowling. So much more show coming up. Still have a, we still have the rap battle coming up with the finals. We're gonna know who our actual fucking spring turn is. Unpaid. Gonna make sure that it's very clear. We say that on camera. - Nutsack, good news. We celebrate with flutes of Seraphina's piss. (laughing) - We cover you in it like you won the Daytona 500. - It's the golden ticket of AGT. - And we're gonna take a look at gimmicks porn tabs. All this is more in the last two and a half hours of Legion of Skates. - I just went to Seraphina. I was like, oh, this guy, I'm sorry. He's a piece of shit. (laughing) - I'm sorry. - No, you don't deserve the sure of the kid. - No one treats Seraphina better than me. Where is she? (audience cheering) - No one treats, no one. - No, it's full on respect. My comedy daughter. I told her everything she knows about being hilarious. - But you have a daughter. - I know, but she's not as hilarious. - That's not true, Isabelle is very funny. - Which means she's not as important. - My daughter did comedy once and then immediately was like, open mic seems like it sucks dick. I don't want to waste my time with that bullshit. - Then you ain't ever wanna do it. - Yeah, that's fine, yeah, do something else, that's fine. - Hey real quick Skanks fans, let's thank one of our amazing sponsors for today's show and that is Sheath Underwear. Ooh, they've been with us for a long time and my dick and balls have just been feeling great for years. I take it for granted almost. These underwears are so great. And your dick and balls deserve the absolute best. Switch to Sheath Underwear right now and see what you have been missing. They're the best underwear ever with obviously the two pouch technology. One for your bag and one for your fucking packer. - They make you look great, dude. I don't look any other time, whoops. - You look fine. - And no, I don't look great in my underwear except when I'm wearing a Sheath. I look like, I feel as confident as I've ever felt. - Yeah, but it's still not great for you. - No, it's not great. Look, it's not great for anybody, but for me it's pretty good. - It's good for me, dude. It really squeezes the right way, dude. I'm fucking, it's packing what I'm saying. Hold on. Go ahead, feel that, dude. You're not wrong. Hang on, get me a stop hauling at it. - Joyce and Joyce and feel James Balls and Dick right here. - I don't need to, I feel the essence from him. - Damn right, you do. - Go to Sheath.com/LOS and use the code LOS for 20% off today. Sheath even offers the first pair guarantee. So if it's not for you, you can get your money back. But once you try Sheath, there's no going back. That's S-H-E-A-T-H.com/LOS and code LOS for 20% off. - Let's take a quick moment and thank Blueprint for supporting the show. You need to stop mixing and matching your daily supplements. Blueprint's longevity mix is just one daily scoop mixed into water with science-backed data-driven ingredients. That scoop of Blueprint helps support energy, cognitive performance, mood, focus sleep, and healthy aging. It also tastes great. I'll tell you right now. You don't want to take a bunch of pills every morning, right? You don't want to have to take 15 supplements every single day. Why not just have one scoop, one quick drink in the morning? It'll make your life that much better. The third party tested for purity and toxins. And you can see the results in everything in the supplements on their site. - With science-backed precision-based dose, no BS. For a limited time, only Legion of Skanks fans get 20% off plus free shipping at Blueprint. Lose a mouthful. Blueprint. Brian with a Y. Blueprint. Brian Johnson. B-R-Y-A-N-J-O-H-N-S-O-N dot com. And then use code skanks. Listen, get a pen. It's code skanks. That's the easy part. You got it? This code's going to be skanks. But it's blueprint dot B-R-Y-A-N. Brian Johnson spelled like you think dot com. And for all that effort, you're only going to get 20% off. [LAUGHTER] Your time's like you said. Fucking crazy. All right, let's get back into it.
All right, we have the results ladies and gentlemen the results for the line detector are in You want them up while a one at a time. Yeah, don't come up here one at a time guys. So the first one was Sarable Paul Sarable Paul gonna take a good Sarable Paul and I could tell you just by looking at him a scumbag liar you think so I think everything oh Yeah, he's walking straight out of here This guy's got nothing wrong with him. I saw him. He'll kick the other day Where's that guy going. Is there a DJ set upstairs? You just goes out to George Floyd's family Question one you asked Paul if no one would ever find out Would you have sex with the 17-year-old girl? That's a crazy question. I'm sorry Yeah, dude. You got me on me for something like that with you. I did yeah Paul said no and the lie detector determines. He's telling the truth He's like and he's not exactly rain and pussy on this guy. He's like too old Fucking bush beat it grandma. They usually stop playing roadblocks around then Get him in their problem No fucking him was called playing roadblock And we always got to remember when we do the lie detector you have to ask such Easy specific questions to not find loopholes in an answer got question - yes Do you think there's any chance in God's green earth? You could fulfill any duties required as an intern here Paul said no and the lie detector test term. He's telling the truth Honestly save It was a big one. That's a big moment. That's a lyricist A poet with words Poe it. Fuck yeah. Oh You too Nevermind Question number three you ask them have you ever used your condition to get sympathy pussy? Paul said no and the lie detector test determined he was telling the truth Wow Wait Paul Have you gotten pussy before What was the question I'm a microphone Have you gotten pussy before yes, okay, I never was about your disability Normal normal lady It's never been the Disability it's all about his face, which is the revolting part was it was it was it a disabled woman or yes It was a disabled woman death woman physical or mental a disability She was deaf deaf. Yes. Oh my god. Wow. Did she moan crazy? Yes She has Yeah, did you I gotta go creep it out. No, I'm not you walk like that Are you like redone? I think I took your crush is you took my crush is Just two wheelchairs banging around You guys are these two fucking are playing murder ball Roll of shame We do the episode on YouTube throwing a little murder ball thing on the screen there If you don't like pausing in deaf are not even the same Side of handicapped the same group with the library. Yeah, exactly same community center for sure We didn't mean that the library was Take this information run all your field research is just made off in one swoop and that was the only girl you were ever with That was the only girl you were ever with No, I've had a few relationships. You've got a few relationships Disabled there are some normals in there some disabled some normals. Okay Yeah, he hasn't judged you if you're normal he doesn't Last question. I'm sorry that I have Yes, do you prefer normal or Is there because these guys have never had sex with a retarded girl except for this guy They're wondering if maybe there's something that they're missing out on yeah like retard strength like it's like a Hand job. It's like you come fast because it feels dangerous because she might rip it off completely So yeah, it's like girl you have to keep make sure you're pleasing her before she hulks out. Yeah, you don't have to ask her to spit on it Yeah, I watch this bitch strip the corn off a cob It's pretty good either way, but plusy's pussy That's a take note some of the fucking gummy legs is just as good as your normal movie It doesn't matter if the hole is there it's there and I'll put my penis it until I'm done I'll flop your fucking shoelace legs around however it has to go. I don't care That horse hobbles says it's a hole a hole. Yeah, as long as you have a complete face Two more questions for perfect so far though three for three. Yeah You said if hurting guest digital fix your crazy body would you do it? Paul said no in the lie detector test was undetermined But to be fair, they should have hurt us to fix your body You should have said yes, dude. You're fucking bodies He's thinking about the normal pussy fees again. It's like finding a wing place. It gives all flats Life's different forever. You know, that fucking gristle and we're fucking car legit lemon pepper wet from here on outplay, boy It's magic city honey barbuck you bone was basically I mean I might have been the first time the question even occurred to him though Yeah, you know it's fucking great. He has no idea. I'm determined though. It's not officially a lot to have a lie So outside of really just three and a half points so far. All right, gee Mike And then finally said do you think you're funnier than Mike Feeney? He said no in the lie detector test determined. He was telling the truth wow four and a half points That is a great score to beat one person I'm for cerebral Paul guys give him some Somebody goes five for five. We're seeing this guy rap Can we call him big daddy came Give it is up next Now gimmick we're figuring out right now if you're gay or a liar There's a change you leap here as This guy's got stolen gay valor over you just got sure to see valor He's definitely being changed to game at the end of his on this week's episode of Fagged or fired Did you imagine everything he says no to we make him do gay and we go oh, dude It's not the worst thing you've ever done you've enjoyed jizz. Where does asking you to fucking kiss a guy? All right, gee Mike. Oh All right, the first question you asked you said have you ever done anything gay? Give me said yes in the lie detector test determined he was telling the truth all right You're Question two you said have you ever done anything sexual with a man Give me said yes the lie detector test determined he was telling the truth Thumbs through the sleeves thing now it all makes sense. He's my girl. He's waiting for an evidence in cost here He has a choker in his car that he took off before he came in No, chokers his family nicknamed trust him. He definitely knows every line of the Yeah, we did it. We've been in a hot topic to recently It's turned to all anime Question three you asked him have you ever done anything sexual with a man because you wanted to thank you You're welcome gimmick said yes the lie detector test determined he was telling the truth Love it out this portion of the segment is outing gimmick You You asked if do you like big J more than Lewis? Yes, the lie detector test determined he was telling the truth
Dude, all unwelcome under my umbrella. - I could use a fuckin' pro, a gay pro wrestler. - Will it be you? - Will it be boys kissing under your umbrella? - Hell yeah, this is finisher. Flying 69, dude. Make it flying 69, that's his finishing move. - It's finishing move. - Watch out, Lewis, don't talk shit. - Dude, before my boy flying 69. - Yeah, he's gonna make you come in, tap. And he's pumped about both, dude. - So pumped for both. - And finally, you asked, have you ever been happy to make another man ejaculate him? (laughing) - Give me a sec, yes, the lie detector test determined he was telling the truth. - Yeah, that's a five. (cheering) - Honest, Honest, the lead, Honest Gabe. (laughing) - Okay, in the interest of specificity, he could have been glad to make the guy come 'cause then it was over. (laughing) - Zack, don't give me that out, you piece of shit. - That's not what he meant. Damn, dude, strap him up again. - You gotta be so specific, you have to say that. - Fuck. - You got my, you're happy that the guy's come on you because you were super happy to play with his dick because it was a guy you wanted to have sex with. (laughing) - Kempik, I think you're basically guaranteed to get into the finals right now, so how do you feel? How do you feel? - Right. (clapping) - No, is this as good or better than gay sex? (laughing) - I feel like I have a worse than having a guy's come. - Whatever you answer, we know the true answer. (laughing) - It's more pleasurable, this feeling, we're having a cop to your throat as a man shoots his load into your face. - Winning or butt fucking guys. (laughing) - I think give it just a win from me to take it. - I really, I respect and laugh so hard at gay sex. - So good. - So good, dude. We have one more. Not Zack, you fucking crazy son of a bitch. You're a wild man. Let's see if he was a liar. Once again, the person who has the lowest score here will be going home right now and we will have a final rap battle to see who our final intern is. What a show, what a week. What a good competition. (clapping) G Mike, what do we got? - The first question you said, would you rather drink Seraphina's piss over your own girlfriends? You said no, the lie detector was undetermined. (cheering) - Where is she? - She's not in the room. Oh, we got a towel. - Yeah, she moved. - Where is she? Oh, she's there still, wow. Wait, hold on, how does that make you feel? - Here's one drink, anyone's piss. - But if he had to choose. - But yeah, if he had to choose. - He's undetermined whether or not it would be. - He's Seraphina's. You don't care. - Yeah, but what? If he preferred, another lady's piss is the question. - Undetermined, I mean, that means like he was really holding on and trying to like make his body straight. (laughing) Get his heartbeat regulated, he was pinching himself. - He's got a thumbtack in his shirt and putting his foot down on it. - I think we can all agree that Seraphina's squirt would smell like cucumber water and yours would be like rug. (laughing) - Now, man, is it true you did win the title of Mrs. Sparrow's 2024? (laughing) - She just beat fucking Joey. (laughing) - Yeah, do she like squirt like lentil soup? - Absolutely definitely. - Yeah, Ukrainian ethnic foods for sure. - Yeah, yeah. - That's a thick parogi piss for sure, no. - I don't know, is that your period or borched? (laughing) - Seraph is just peeing out fucking leave shade off of a tree. - That's great, dude. - Like a fallen. - Like a brana source. - Like a fallen. Number two. Number two. You asked them, do you think you can produce a podcast better than Alex? - Oh, that one's even worse. - gimmick said yes and the lie detector test determined he's telling the truth. - Wow. (cheering) - Yes, respectful. - Yes, respectful. That's who to be your boss if you get through to this. Jesus. - I would never be an uncomfortable relationship theft. - She's not gonna take it. - You might try to physically intimidate her. He looks like that kind of guy. - Yeah. - That'd be great, dude. If someone sort of secretly beating Alex. (laughing) - She had to come to us and tell us and like, I haven't seen that. (laughing) - Then herring too. - You can't just throw these kind of accusations around. - Yeah, I mean it's white things. - You know what that could do to his life? - Dude, his wife's fucking rug company is all fucking consumer-based shit. - It's out of whack. - It's out of whack. You're gonna fuck up their online presence. - Yeah. - This will look terrible for gas digital. We need to keep this to yourself. - And now that we know that even our own husband won't drink her piss, no one's gonna respect her. (laughing) - You guys just missed him take the biggest breath in, breath out to try and calm down to these next three. - He did this, he went. (laughing) - I wanna win, dude. - You wanna win, I get it, dude. - He's also trying to stay out of power-save mode. - No, but I'm gonna fuck dude, I'm just sassy. - That's the question of shaking the mouse before your screen turns dark. - He's got shiggled. - He just, he's pipes. (laughing) - All right, let's see. - The next question, you asked Nutsack, have you ever done anything gay for the purposes of sexual pleasure with a man? - Yes. - Nutsack said no, lie detector test determined, he was telling the truth. - Wow. - Straight as a man, that's a hooking lie like it. - Yeah, straight. (clapping) - Yeah. - So, 2026, man, open your mind, dog. (laughing) - All right, so, yes, two and a half points right now. - We asked, would you do something gay to retain your internship at Guest Digital? - You said no, the lie detector was undetermined. (crowd cheering) - Wow. - So, logically, your commitment to this job is what fucked you over in this competition right now, because you're at three points right now, you can only get four, we're gonna find out your last question, but we're gonna have to say goodbye to Nutsack right now in this competition. You drink piss for nothing. (laughing) You got mace for nothing, we bear mace you outside. - A woman on your favorite podcast who produces a hate to you now? (laughing) Every time you need help from your girlfriend, she's gonna go, "Why don't you get Sarah Feena "and get you fuck off?" - You ruined her relationship with your girlfriend. - Why isn't Sarah Feena fucking get your favorite pillow? - And finally, you asked, "Did you use AI "to help you with your raps?" He said, "Yes, the lie detector test attorney "was telling the truth." - Wow. - Four points, and he cheated for the rap battle in the end anyway. Ladies and gentlemen, Nutsack is your biggest fucking liar. What a piece of shit. - Boo! - You fucking lying scumbag. - Back to the rug factory for you. - He wants to, he wants to have a goodbye. He can have a goodbye thing. - Did, I really wanted to win this bad. I was pretty nervous. - I didn't fucking lie. - But I don't believe him. - I'm out of the competition. - You are determined to win. - Maybe I can get back in by fighting the winner. - Surrible, Paul? - No? (laughing) It's fucking crazy. - It's fucking, it's been seen all over. (laughing) - You think we all don't want to just fight, serve upon, win easy. - Well, with gimmick, it'd be a good fight. - The fucking fun wouldn't be to beat the shit out of Surrible Paul. - If you can't do anything, he's defenseless. - gimmick is obviously, it's not 100% either, man. - No, absolutely. - The gimmick is right now inside. He's dealing with a lot. - Yeah. - What is a raging homosexual? - You're not beating up a mentally handicapped person and somebody who has Surrible Paul's here. - Really? (laughing) - If you fight, gimmick, you're fighting a guy who just came to terms with himself 15 fucking minutes ago. - I would try Judo, I don't know on Surrible Paul. (laughing) - I would attempt to videos on him. - Dude, gimmick has the head of one of those pro wrestlers that's like eight feet tall. - Oh, yes. - And it's good. - It dragged out of the corners. - If I fought Surrible Paul, I would try to punch him into different rooms, like Mortal Kombat. I would see if I could punch him upstairs. - If you fight gimmick, can the loser be the guy who has to say uncle? (laughing) - I love that. I love that. - One more time for Nutsack. He tried, guys. Give it up for Nutsack. He didn't work so hard. (clapping and cheering) Very clammy hands. - Service. - Very clammy hands on Nutsack. And we have our final, our finals are happening right now. A rap battle. These guys both, they all prepared wraps for each other. So they prepared a bunch of wraps, I'm assuming, but this is gonna be it. They chose their own beats and everything. All right, guys. We're gonna give it up for Surrible Paul first. (clapping and cheering) This is a great crack to be. Go one of the best rappers in the world. - Oh, thank you. - Other battling each, yes, so they could think they could. - I've been trying to see how small of a space I could fit Surrible Paul into. - Dude, my, uh. - So it is these two are rapping against each other. - That makes gimmick of blood, right? - Dude, what, they're setting us up? What, they're setting us up? My daughter went to see Jay Z last night. It was fucking stalled, like four fucking, it's crazy. It started like 12, 15 at night. That's wild. - Are you saying a black guy was late? (laughing) - No, some kind of security thing, but they were all packed everybody outside of Yankee Stadium. So like, I think they added you a bomb sweep. - Is that what it was? - Yeah, I think they got that every time. - Yeah, there's something, a threat of something, yeah. - Damn. - Anyway, she's alive, everyone. - Yay. - Alright, Surrible Paul's got first. We have, give me a second. - Do you think the guy on the shirt he's wearing is one of the guys? - Amazing, right? - Well, you know, he gets a microphone, right? - I give the merch afterwards. - Hell, absolutely dude. - If a guy was nice enough to let me butt fuck him. I go clean yourself up with that.
this. If you want to wash it yours, my, my won't reach. Hey, wipe your lower back with this and then get out. I can't believe we've just done. I might even get your gay for you. Let me do this under you while you waddle to the bathroom. Hey, go awkward for your asshole. Fucking bring me back up for protein shake. Alright, go for it. I'm not the best to look at and I know that I walk a little bit crooked but I've never been shopped. Never been cooked. I'm the 99 calculus, the full metal alchemist while you're the man with the Hitler stat. Boy your face really smells like ass and I know I might have to pass at the spring term Olympics but you know I'm in this to win this. So take your ass back to hot. You know you're the fucking slug and while I'm the pint-sized pimple cousin picking back B.V. Bull Buzzo. That's the thing on the side of his shower. Crack what you think of that. I mean the word play was there. Definitely some lyricism. Definitely a little shaky. I would like you to start more confident, you know, but maybe that's something you have going on. I don't know but I don't see it getting much better than that. That was pretty good. Pretty fucking good. Fell off a couple times, got back on. That's something that's hard to do. Yeah, especially when you only have one leg. Gamer, you're up. Yeah, you're gay. Get it. Forget about all that gay stuff, dude. Right now we're doing something off. We're not getting on straight to right now. We're going to pretend we're, I was there enough for this round. I'm going to pretend I don't know who you are. Me personal. I have some curious years in my teens. I'm not like some fucking flammer. Yeah, dude. It was part of the history of Jackson. Oh my god, the over-explanation is making it so much work. It's out of the room. My eliminate is out of the room. Or you're turning up. Yeah, all right. I put in you overdose and work for me, brother. Just like sobriety, pregnancy didn't work for your mother. But enough of these hijinks, do you really think that this man could run on drinks? He can't even blink. He's out of sync. Or us, I'd like a slow wink. Bold for fake Italian considering your spas with East Lim. Having a mind of its own like it's improv jazz. Uh, you need more. Oh my god, I can't believe. It's about to be over. I don't know. This is crazy. This is like when Jake won the last one. It's a psychotic. This is a slightly upgrade from Jake. Damn, rap is not my strong suit. We all realize that. You think it's Sarah Muppell's strong suit. Oh, man, dude, if we ended this with a making another man come competition, you would have fucking crushed it. You should have fucking, when the first thing, gay question came back, you should have punched G Mike and ran out of the room. You're going to lose the contest because of the rapid now everyone knows everything you've done. Everyone that wins these things and is useless, when are you guys going to learn? They keep winning. The definition of insanity is trying the same thing over and over, expecting a different results. It's been fucking losers. Every time in the second and third place, like shit head here are really useful and good people and then they stick around. Sarah from it to evil and we fucking got through. And Sarah from it didn't even won, Paul. Paul. Paul. Paul. Paul. Paul. Paul. Paul. Paul. Paul. In every fucking time. I don't think anyone has ever stuck around. He's got a big dog. You for Adam Corolla in three months. Not wrong with that. More than likely. Holy shit. All right. I mean, look, we'll go to prakameco as a resident hip hop artist. We're going to waste everyone's time with you. I think we all know, but crack, what do you think here? I was trying to decide whether or not I was going to give it to Paul as a bit, but he legitimately is the body of it, ironically, he embodied him. Ladies, gentlemen, the winner of the 2026 three-total Olympics. Cerebral Paul. (audience cheering) ♪ Cerebral Paul, Cerebral ♪ ♪ Thanks for going there ♪ ♪ That's what they're like ♪ ♪ Spray, take this life away ♪ ♪ He's a useless, he's a terrible guy ♪ ♪ He's a fucking dumbass, re-dog ♪ ♪ But he won the fucking show like ♪ ♪ Trey, Dura, Bail ♪ ♪ Dura, Bail, Bail ♪ ♪ He's a useless, fray, terrible guy ♪ ♪ He's a terrible guy, he's a terrible guy ♪ ♪ That's 'cause you're warned ♪ ♪ I'm a terrible lady, babe ♪ ♪ I'm pretty sure it's a legal ♪ ♪ Cerebral Paul, Cerebral Paul ♪ Unfortunately, they didn't clap at the end, so we gotta run it back. ♪ Turn up, limp, pick ♪ ♪ Now, Cerebral ♪ ♪ Spray, take this life back ♪ ♪ Cerebral Paul, Cerebral Paul ♪ ♪ You're a winner in these years ♪ ♪ Get for no reason ♪ ♪ Spray, take this life back ♪ ♪ That's what I said, but that I can't believe ♪ ♪ We can't do what's destined ♪ ♪ He is retarded ♪ ♪ As lights don't work ♪ ♪ But we're all left, probably dead ♪ ♪ This time, drink, drink ♪ ♪ Do where's my ass, tray ♪ - Thank you. - Yeah! - Thank you. - Great point, great point guy, clap, I heard it. - I heard it. - And early congratulations to the winter internal Olympics winner, head in a jar. (audience laughs) Paul, do you have anything to say for yourself? I'm very proud of myself and I'm proud of you. - How are you? - We're proud of you, brother. - Congratulations, though. - He's your last song, but he's nobody's on his cover. - So far, Dicks killed Tony. - We started to, to the full disclosure, we started setting up competition, saying, "Well, we got to get rid of cerebral pals, "so let's do physically and possible things for him." And you made it all the way through despite everyone trying to sabotage you. - I figured that. - Yeah. - Wow, we were like having a cerebral pals, but he kicks ass and everyone loves it. (laughs) And then he just can't fucking win it, dude. - Got to win it, it's hard. - Like the next, yeah. - He rose above all fucking challenges, dude. Don't let people tell you something. If you have a disability out there, you can eventually do a horrific job but getting his drinks 'cause we have a sense of obligation now. (laughs) - If you're thinking it was so long to get us our drinks. - I'm gonna just get my own drinks. - Oh, you better keep coming, dude. - You had a cerebral pals shadow. - You had a guy that told you we can't do the job. It's on a letter. - He didn't form his own life, Tector. He's never been able to do anything gay, right? (laughs) - I don't know if you understand this, though. The guy did nothing gay for pleasure, no less. - For pleasure. - Not even money. For pleasure, no. - You'll let the uncles slide. - Oh, fuck. - The uncles. The uncles in your fall. - He went back to the well. - That is your fall. Whose last few were your fall? - And now you're hidden last challenge. You have to race me up the stairs. (laughs) - Dude, this is, you can do this in your sleep, so I'll walk you up this fall. - In your sleep. - A real tortoise in the tortoise. (laughs) - Oh my god. - Dude, the odds on this are gonna be fucking tight. (laughs) (indistinct) - So look, this is Tristan's last show. The crack of an announcement you're gonna make at the end of the show and we have a new song for you that we're gonna world premiere at the end of this show. But Tristan, let's say goodbye to you first, my friend, because we love you, man. We, you know, 15 years of creating something together. - You were fucking 13 years old. - Yeah, dude. - I was 13. You were a 13 year old boy when we found you. (audience applauds) And we watched you grow into just being a beast. - So, you got sex for time. - What you've done with politics. - You've been there every time. - Honestly, God, your crossover politics has been insane to watch. - Great father. - I know. I can't believe I met Charlie Kirk, that won Misty Day and wherever he was. - I know. - You did ruin that Lewis's buy bit, but. - That is my bet. - No, no, no. - Sure. Everything's fine. - The thing is, I just can only be honest and that's what helps me out in politics. - It is. - Yes. - That is the fucking thing. - I'm assuming about how I want a shadowbox Benjamin and Yahoo. - But we do. - And skank this. (laughs) - But we do have a little, a little best of my dogs that the producers put together for you. - Oh, you guys. - Tristan Bowling. - 15 years. - Tristan Bowling. Louis J. Gomez, big jail person. - I've been a part of this thing for past 15 years. - We don't show no damn spider people here, boy. - I've been tricked before.
-You must work as a team, gentlemen. ♪ By the rest, direct you with ♪ -Next week is going to be. [ Laughter ] -What? [ Cheers and applause ] [ Cheers and applause ] -It's trying to be honest with you, buddy. -Yeah. -I grew up looking up to you, man, man. -I wouldn't be a part of comedy. -Thank you, man. -Thank you. -If you're wondering for what the three of you did, so thank you so much, man. -Thank you so much, man. -What a -- What a road it's been. -What a road it's been. -Aunt Bigger and brighter things, my man. -I know. -Your main stream, we're down here in the trenches. -I know. -I kiss can to soons. -In our hearts, dude, we just can't. It's three for life. -Three for life, baby. [ Cheers and applause ] -Clark and McGee have an announcement. I have an announcement as well. Just like this is the last time you guys will see Tristan as the host of the show. This is the last time you're going to see me in this fashion. Retiring from rap, 32 years old, and honestly embarrassed to be wearing shit like this. I played the character for as long as I could, but it's time for me to be the real genuine version of me. So I hope you guys will respect that. -The real genuine version. All right, well, here it is. World premiere of "Track and McGee"s new, the new "Track and McGee" show. End of an era. -I got nowhere else to go. -Will you survive my life? -Oh. [ Cheers and applause ] [ Music ] [ Laughter ] [ Music ] ♪ How long can I keep up with this old game ♪ ♪ It's old game ♪ ♪ The duets and gold grills don't fit the scent, hey ♪ ♪ Well, I was fin fire, but the flame burned out ♪ ♪ On a long dark road ♪ ♪ And I'd hate to turn around ♪ ♪ But I made up my mind ♪ ♪ And I'm praying that it's not too late ♪ ♪ To say I want to be white again ♪ ♪ I want to be white again ♪ ♪ I want to stock and then crimes and be on time again ♪ ♪ And I want to say I love my prayers and even my nightmares ♪ ♪ 'Cause keeping up all blacks is getting tired ♪ ♪ And I'm tired of being a rapper ♪ ♪ Tired of being a wigger ♪ ♪ Tired of my daddy saying I'm acting like an income poop ♪ ♪ I'm leaving home and turning to buy me to be who I am inside again ♪ ♪ Not again ♪ ♪ I'm gonna flush my perks and lean and grab a couple of fruits ♪ ♪ It's true ♪ ♪ I'm gonna trade my new board ♪ ♪ Hundred four can a shit hit you ♪ ♪ If post my loan can do it and jelly broke and do it ♪ ♪ And neither one can say I guess it's really nothing to it ♪ ♪ 'Cause I'm country fans are stupid and they'll listen to whatever you play ♪ ♪ So I say I want to be white again ♪ ♪ I want to be white again ♪ ♪ I want to stock and then crimes and be on time again ♪ ♪ I want to say I love my prayers and even my nightmares ♪ ♪ 'Cause keeping up all blacks is getting tired ♪ ♪ And I'm tired of being a rapper ♪ ♪ Tired of being a wigger ♪ ♪ Tired of my daddy saying I'm acting like an income poop ♪ ♪ I'm leaving home and turning to buy me to be who I am inside again ♪ ♪ I want to be white again ♪ ♪ I want to be white again ♪ ♪ Dear white lord ♪ ♪ I want to be a master of dark arts ♪ ♪ But then my country stars make it so much ♪ ♪ Got damn money, pardon me, why? ♪ ♪ I just want to make my daddy proud of me ♪ ♪ Lord, can you find it in your heart now? ♪ ♪ Make me white again ♪ ♪ Um, yeah, I'm gonna be white again ♪ ♪ I'm gonna be white again ♪ ♪ I'm gonna stock and then crimes and be on time again ♪ ♪ Thank God I said I love my prayers and even my ♪ ♪ Fight who man's ♪ ♪ 'Cause keeping up a black sin was too tired ♪ ♪ And I was tired of being a rapper ♪ ♪ Tired of being a wigger ♪ ♪ Tired of my daddy saying I'm acting like an income poop ♪ ♪ I'm leaving home and turning to buy me to be who I am inside again ♪ ♪ I think I'm white again ♪ ♪ I want to be white again ♪ ♪ Dear white lord ♪ ♪ I want to be white again ♪ ♪ 'Cause keeping up a black sin was too tired of being a rapper ♪ ♪ Tired of being a wigger ♪ ♪ I'm gonna stock and then crimes and be on time again ♪ ♪ I'm gonna be white again ♪ ♪ I'm gonna be white again ♪ ♪ I'm gonna be white again ♪ ♪ I'm gonna stock and then crimes and be on time again ♪ It's the right move, it's the right move for you, my man. I've seen it work. I'm blessed to be here with you, brothers. Hell yeah, everyone, your favorite new Christian country star, Crack Amico, the name stays the same. The vibe is different. How about it for Crack Amico? Our amazing panel, Zach Amico. Tim Butterley in town. I hope these guys got guessed it. My F.I. was coming out real soon. Look out for those. We've just skanks one last time. Good bye to our fucking long-time friend Tritris. Oh my god. We don't know where we're going to get a Christian bond. We're four million lives are going to sort it out. We always try. We always try to sort things out here. And you guys got it. We keep a level head, but no matter what, the Legion of Skanks lives on. As always, the fucking Legion of Skank Hell yeah, dude. Skank hands it. No one gives a shit. I don't give a fuck either. I quit. Good night. You've been listening to the Legion of Skanks podcast with Big J. Opperson. Did you suck it? I think I would instinctually suck it. Yes, we fucking over, Lewis. Lewis Gomez. Lewis J Gomez. Lewis J Gomez. You're trying to watch a retard-draw swastika hilarious. I'm sort of known as a point guard of podcasting. Being a fat gay guy is so fucking awesome. And comedian Tristan Bowling. The Legion of Skanks podcast. [Music]
Podcast Summary
Key Points:
The episode marks Tristan Bowling's final show after 15 years with the Legion of Skanks, celebrated with guests and a farewell tone.
Guests include Crack Amico, Zach Amico, and Tim Butterley, each plugging upcoming projects like comedy specials and tours.
The Spring Turn Olympics finals feature three interns—Cerebral Paul, Gimmick, and Nutsack—competing in tasks, including a lie detector test.
Lie detector results reveal Gimmick as openly gay (admitting sexual acts with men), while Cerebral Paul and Nutsack answer various personal questions, with some undetermined results.
A rap battle is set for the final two interns to determine the winner, with the loser eliminated.
The show includes comedic banter about a flight instructor who jumped to his death, leaving a student to land the plane, and a comedian booed offstage in Indianapolis.
Sponsorships and plugs are woven throughout, including Body Brain Coffee, Brunt Workwear, GLD jewelry, Sheath Underwear, and Blueprint supplements.
The episode blends humor with farewell tributes, including a planned final rap battle and ongoing intern antics.
Summary:
This episode of the Legion of Skanks podcast is a celebratory and chaotic farewell to Tristan Bowling, who is leaving after 15 years. The hosts—Big J Elkerson, Luis J. Gomez, and Tristan—are joined by guests Crack Amico, Zach Amico, and Tim Butterley, who promote their upcoming comedy specials and tours.
The main event is the Spring Turn Olympics finals, where three interns—Cerebral Paul, Gimmick, and Nutsack—compete in a lie detector test to determine who advances to a rap battle for the coveted unpaid internship. The results are comedic: Gimmick admits to gay sexual experiences, including enjoying making another man ejaculate, while Cerebral Paul and Nutsack answer questions about personal topics, with some responses marked as undetermined. The show also features humorous discussions about a flight instructor who jumped to his death, leaving a student to land the plane, and a comedian who was booed and hit with a bottle onstage.
Throughout, the hosts weave in sponsor ads and playful banter, maintaining the show's signature crude and irreverent tone. The episode builds toward the rap battle finals, promising more chaos and entertainment in the remaining hours.
FAQs
The episode celebrates Tristan Bowling's last show after 15 years with the podcast, marking the end of an era.
The guests are Crack Amico, Zach Amico, and Tim Butterley, each promoting their own projects like YouTube specials and stand-up dates.
It is a contest among interns, featuring lie detector tests and a rap battle, with the winner becoming the final unpaid intern.
Gimmick admitted to having sexual experiences with men, enjoying making another man ejaculate, and preferring Big J over Lewis, all confirmed as truthful.
Cerebral Paul was truthful in most answers, including not having sex with a minor, not using his condition for sympathy, and not being funnier than Mike Feeney.
Nutsack's test was undetermined on some questions, but he truthfully denied gay sexual activity and was ambiguous about breaking up with his girlfriend to win.
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