Thomas Lennon Investigates The Bobby Lee Wardrobe Malfunction

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And start delivering legendary performances, Luke. The link is in the episode description. We're on Spotify, video. Hey, Tucker Bell, a video now available to watch on Spotify, everybody. A Spotify, Pay Me and Users gets your ads and more eyes. We love your ads and more eyes. We love more eyes. Yeah. Get the third eye. Fourth. And watch more. Get Spotify, video. More and more, much videos and watch it. [MUSIC] Who is Luke? [LAUGHTER] Don't even know. What? Yeah, yeah. Luke. I've had it. I've had it. We already got it. I only had a second to do whatever you want to do. But I've been saying-- Who is Luke? I've had some juggie dimwit who sits next to me. What do you do with him? Yeah, yeah, yeah. He got deported. You're at the top of your head. No, no, no, no. He's in Texas. You're talking about a high man. I don't know, man. Do I sit with Luke or what do I do? I'm sorry. You already know Luke. Oh, no. I like Luke. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You came in. I thought I said something. No, you don't talk to the guests. He's new. I come in. Hey. Who the fuck is Luke? What the fuck is happening? I'm supposed to say. I know. I come up to your layer. Hold on, hold on. If I didn't say something, it'd be weird. Luke, you fucking knew it. I didn't know. I didn't know. I didn't know. Why did you fucking know? I didn't know what was happening. I know. I'm going to say this from now on, all right? Okay. Sometimes we get big guests here. Yeah, yeah. We got the day Franco coming in a week. Yeah, in a week. A couple of days. Yeah, yeah. Bigger guests, Thomas. You're very, very, very big. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Thomas, bigger guests. But I'm just saying. Sometimes Luke, let's go. Put your headphones on Luke. Right? Sometimes I get big guests here, right? Yeah, I know. Hey, you don't touch don't stare the guests. Here they go. You know, talk to him, man. You were scary. You fucked up. Bobby. Bobby talks first. You don't say shit outside of the family. Bobby. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Stocks to me. What the fuck? What do we do? What do we do? What do we do? Bobby talks first. Bobby. What do we do? What do we do over here? Say it through Bobby. Okay. I'm the fucking boss over here. Okay. All right. What the fuck is Luke? Can you tell him? Can you tell him? Can you tell him? We know you got no parlay. Who? We know Tony Tuton. Yeah. I'm more concerned, Luke. Yeah. Okay. What is the point difference on IMD between Dave Franklin? Oh, I'm fucked 99. Oh, that's good. By the way. He's going down. He's going down. He's going down. You're going up. You're going up. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's going down. You're going up. You're going up. Right? No. We're only like 1,100 apart. I know. That's good. Keep a mind, Bobby. What do you, what the pointy lately? Keep a mind. What the pointy lately? It's so that Luke doesn't talk to him. This is a new thing you're doing. I don't like it. I know. The pointy thing that was new. But, uh, we came hard. What's Bobby at? Four grand. It's pretty good. Yeah. Keep a mind, Bobby. Bobby. Is it higher? No, no, no. He's beating you by 3,000. What? All right. So the one of the lowest number possible. Oh, you want to go low. You want to go low on. I'm a, I see. Bobby. Hey, when's that photo from? Yeah. Go back to Bobby's photo. Look at that. Look at that little twink. Oh, wait. So 4,000, 422 is not that good. Is that your, is that all good? That's not good. And also a grinder profile picture. Because you're going to stay busy. Oh, you're going to laugh at that look. You're going to laugh at the grinder joke. That's Thomas. He's the gas. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. What do you know Thomas from? I know. I know. I know. We used to have you brought a boy. You brought a boy. A man's podcast. No, no. I'm a man. Yeah. How old are you, Luke? I'm 25. 25. Yeah. That's kind of man. That's kind of man. Yeah. You're I'm DB. Yeah. Yeah. I got it. Yeah. It used to be. Yeah. It's used to be a lion. I know. We come here. We come here. It would be some juggied dimwit. Yeah. Yeah. Nothing. You have an I'm DB? I think I have something. I don't know if you've never done anything. You've never done anything. I did a short film. I think is on there. I don't know. Show it to me. I know that it comes up. It comes up. It comes up. Oh, Luke Biko. Here we go. It comes up. 20,000. That's not fair. You're almost done a million. I'm trending up. I'm trending up. You're a director. Director. Yeah. You're directing the short film. Bye. Bye. Bye. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. There are more people than that. On I'm DB. Come on. We're almost done a million people. I don't know if some searchers are coming. No. Yeah. Keep in mind. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Don't even look at me. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. So everybody, by the way. Yeah. And this is just a thing. Yes. You're around in the fours. Yeah. I'm catching up with your buddy Dave. Frank, I see why you're having him on. Obviously he's in the eights. That's a wonderful place to be. Yeah. You got to get in mind. Yeah. You don't lose your IMDB profile when you die. Oh, I see. So if you are famous. If you're in the top 5,000, which you are. Yeah. Yeah. You are now. You're competing with people alive. And dead. Luke. Luke. And dead. Yeah. Okay. And dead. So there's only in the history of show business. Show business. There are only more. More Saul. More Saul 1100. What is more Saul's IMDB? More Saul. More Saul. More Saul. I don't know how to say that. He died in M-O-R-T. I think S-A-H-L maybe. Look. You don't know who more Saul is. Yeah. Yeah. You don't know who he is. Get out of the business. So you got more Saul died 40, 50 years ago. Bobby. Yeah. If you're at 4,4004, which you are, it's a very nice number. Yeah, yeah. You got to remember. Yes. There's got to be 100 and 200 people on that list ahead of you. Who are dead. Oh, I see. I understand that. I understand that. Yeah. Show us what's up with those more Saul's. Yeah. Yeah. More Saul is at 100,000. 100,000. You can beat Luke. Congrats. You beat more Saul. Barely. Yeah. Yeah. You barely beat a man. If I have a photo for you. Yeah. Oh, my God. Guys, what do we do? We take calls and we talk to you. Wait, I thought you said to lower the better. Yeah, you want the lower. Yeah. So we're as in like one is number one right now. Who's number one right now? No, no, no, no. I got it. Don't jump me. How much if I'm right? Oh, yeah. Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait. Let's play again. Can I guess? Yeah. Brad Pitt. Can I? Sydney Sweeney. Show to me. Yeah. Right now. I think right now. Who do you think it is? I think it's not gonna be Brad Pitt, Bob. I fucked up. I can get it. Can I get it? You say Brad Pitt? No, you're out. No, no, no, no. Why am I out? Okay. You're back in. Oh, Bob is back in. You said Sendia. You said Sendia. Sendia. I think you said Sydney Sweeney beats thousands. I think you said the Chalamet. Is the Chalamet or is it just a straight up Jacobalori like a dream? Oh, Jacobalori. Yeah, there's one of those Chalamet. I want a Chalamet. I'm a Chalamet. There we go. You're missing a very popular film right now. So it's boosting up their surroundings. Oh, damn. Okay. Number one is. Oh, off campus. I love, I'll, I'll, here's a good picture. - I'll probably got three. - Out, Alfred, I'll see you in Davis. Okay, but you know this number four? - Yeah, yeah, yeah. Is this, this is on the earth timeline that we're in? (laughing) - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Same as ours on the line line, right? - Yeah, okay. - We'll be based on this. - Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. - Wait, Gilbert, I think there's a little bit of a confusion here. - Yeah, I don't, you gotta run, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. - I think you gotta run. - No, this is people. - Stop star meter. And that's the very top show, and it's number one. - He's directors, actors. - Number one, number one. - No, no, no, I got it, she's in there. - Well, he'll go by actor. - No, no, no, no. - Let's go by actors, let's go by actors, go by actor. - Oh, okay, here we go. - Uh-oh, here we go. - Alfred Melina. - Is that, how is that even, did something happen to him? - This is our time. (laughing) - Some for all, yeah. - He's a new way to love Alfred Melina. - Yeah, great, yeah. - He's a genius. - He's a genius. (laughing) - He was a little thrown that he's the most and he was creating Indiana Jones. - And it was that part. - In the history of the world. - Remember that big, that big bold up chase after Indian. - Of course, yeah, that's it. - That's it. - Yeah, that's it. - I throw you the whip. - It'll pull me. - It'll pull me. - Yeah, wow. - I know it's his son that's starring in that Sally Field movie that's doing well on the remarkably bright creatures. - Yeah. - Wow. - Okay. - So, okay. - So it was a sense 'cause off-campus is really, - A big show. - A big show. - An obsession was, one of his scenes in the whole pack. - Do you see dogs in it? Is one of these shows where you see some dogs? (laughing) - You did rivalry, that's dogs. - Yeah, you see heated? - I haven't seen that yet. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - So we're just gonna do the dogs. - I love the dogs. (laughing) - All right, quote it. - Those dogs is ice-dongs. Dude, have you ever seen ice-dongs? - No, by the way. - They're frozen. - Oh, it's just a joke. - Ice-dongs. (laughing) - Luke, I'm sorry, we hit it off so bad. - No, it was really my fault. I want to apologize. - I just, you know, we're from a different generation, right? - Yeah. - You know, we made our bones when you were-- - Yeah, yeah, back then. - What year were you born? - 2001. - Oh, that's what I got. - That's when I booked Matt TV. (laughing) - Literally, that was the year. - Yeah, yeah, 2001. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - I was on television when you were born. - Oh, I'd had three shows canceled. (laughing) - And at least two shows canceled. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Do you Reno, what was that, late '90s or? - Reno started, we shot the pilot in 1999. - Yeah, yeah. - Wow. - Yeah, so Reno picked up for like three years, 'cause it just sat on the shelf for a long time. - What a show though, huh? - What a show. - What a show. - Luke, you seen it? - It's one of the best pilot episodes. I always think the cold opens when the funny is cold. If it's in any show ever. - Made a beautiful piece. (laughing) - If you haven't eaten anything. (laughing) - And I quit on it. - You never need anything at all. - You turn that quest, of course. - You turn that quest. - You need anything, you come to me, right? - Right, I will do. - Bobby can't help me. (laughing) - I know. - Bobby only has influence in certain stuff. - Yeah. - Your number, 1,999. - Yeah, yeah. - Yeah, he can't help me. - And then I get you to Franco. (laughing) - You're a good boy. - You turned fast. - He's a good boy. (laughing) - I know, you're a good boy. - I had no idea. - You're a good boy, Luke. - Bobby is a good boy. - He went from me to love real quick. But, wow, really smart. - Who's gonna drive, where is that, Luke's? - That's Bobby's. - Is it the blue one? - Yeah. - Yeah, that's mine. (laughing) - I think it's the green one. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. What do you think, Tom? - I think it's the blue one. (laughing) - Yeah, yeah, the blue one. - Hyundai. - I was hoping-- - Korea. - You had an intern of some kind. - No, no, no. (laughing) - It's like, fuck you, Tom. - Yeah, fuck you back. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - I was hoping that there was some intern who's like, into Hello Kitty or something. Because it's a confusing car. (laughing) - It is. - It is. - It confused me. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. What confused about you? - I was like, that can't be Bobby's car. - Yeah, yeah, Bobby's flashy. Bobby lives, you know, he's got a cool lifestyle. - What can I give you some fun facts, Tom? - No. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, why I'm gonna give it to you. - All right, that gave it to you. - Free. - Correct. - Right, correct. - Yeah. - So Hyundai gives me-- - So it answers the question. If someone gave you a free light blue, light blue, light blue, Elantra, do you take it? - Yes. - And you didn't say, is this a test? (laughing) - No, no, no. I took it. - So every year-- - Does it have to have a heated rival rebumper sticker on it? (laughing) - Does they follow me to watch heated rivalries? - Ice dogs is the life's play. - Ice dogs. Brought here by Elantra. You're quick today, Tom. Tom, you're very quick today. Be careful. (laughing) - I don't know, I don't know. - Just be very careful. - I don't know, you gotta be very careful. - You're invited in now, now you care. Now you do something for me. - Yeah, okay. (laughing) - I don't know. - Yeah, you don't know much about old school show business. - I know, you don't stand up. I'm like, hi, my name is Lulu, Lulu. - That's me, didn't he? - Yeah, yeah, yeah. Why did you do that? - It's alright. - It's alright. - It's a courtier. - Okay, what's that? - Tom comes in. - I was wondering where you were. I thought you got replaced by Luke. - Luke. - It made a mad. - Yeah. - Yeah. - Then he thought Jaime was supposed to be here. - Okay. - I don't know who that is. - He's the person that you referenced earlier. - No, I think he was referencing. (laughing) - Oh, you're referencing. - Yeah, yeah, I'm talking about it. - Oh, thank you. - Oh. - Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. - I don't know what we got here. - I usually said-- - No, no, no. - What did you say? - Bring a bag. - Bring a bag. - What did-- - I said, I said, there's usually a-- - Stone Cold Fox. (laughing) - It was replaced by a tween. - No, where's that dumb dumb or whatever? I thought you said. Luke, what do you think? (laughing) - What did he say? - He's like blue and long trunks. - Yeah, what do you think about it? - I think it's sick and it has a special mode in it. It has like that button you can flip up and you can-- - In a place he did rock. (laughing) - What is that a lot could do? - It has a speed mode. - Yeah. - Just like the Batmobile. - Yeah, yeah. - What was I explaining? - Deep, please enhance. - Well, I'll give you the enhancement because it was a reference for you 'cause you weren't in the Dark Knight Rises. - Thank you. - Oh, thank you. - Oh, thank you. - The band. - Yeah, that's what I was referring to. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - I am in that one. - I am in that one. - This is a real movie star here, Luke, as well. - Well, he doesn't just do broad, silly, desert comedy in Nevada or whatever. - Well, in Africa, what do you do? - What did I say about you? - You up front. - What's up? - What did I do wrong? - Nah, he's just, he's not a made man. (laughing) He's very like, hey, hey, hey, hey, we got Bobby's little buddy. I'm gonna sit in your lap. - I know, I know. - I'm gonna sit in there. - I'm like, I'm like Bobby. What is this? We're a man. He's talking to you. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - What's up? - I don't know, he's just like, I walk in his fuckin' kermits all over me. - Oh, no, no, no. - Look at him. - He loves you. - Look, that's why he's doing you. - I wouldn't goof around if I didn't love him. - We goof around 'cause we have podcasts to fill. - You straight, I'm glad you're back. (laughing) - What's going on with you? You're so funny today. - Got your fast, you're fastin' on. - Yeah, I'm in that picture, you know. - Yeah. - I didn't see what you think of it. - I didn't see what Ted Sarando's house is here. - I've never been invited to that. - Oh. - Are you in that photo? - I am in the photo. - We put the photo up. (laughing) - Are you in the problematic corner or different? - No, I'm in a, do you know what I mean? - Yeah, I'm in the middle. I'm centrally. - You're not in the problem. - Yeah, no, no, no, no. There's some liberals as well. - Well, I want to see the problem. - There are a couple. - Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. - Oh, so you stood by the Snowflake. - Yeah, yeah, well, I'm a liberal. - Okay. - I'm a liberal. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. (laughing) - Call me. - No. - This lip over here. (laughing) - You work for me with Frank on me, right? You work for me and you work for Frank on me. (laughing) - Don't ever, you never go to Bobby again. - I got it. - Bobby's dead to us. (laughing) You love Bobby, buddy's dead. - Okay. - I got you like a sonotra today. - I love him. - You have sonotra. - All right, let's go around the photo. (laughing) - Let's go around the photo. - All right, that, that, that, that, that, that. - Yeah, yeah. - Okay, down on the lower right. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - I want to try to pick people. - Yeah, yeah. - But we have great nice things to say about Carrie Canning, one of my best friends in the world. - Very, very, very good. - Right there in front of Will Forte, looking just like me. - Yes. - One of the mustard. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Wow, it's a good watermelon. - You know what I mean? - Yeah, we know that. - Can we go down? - Yeah, can we go down? - Good friend of ours. We got Ricky Lynn. - That's not, that's not me. - Can we go to the, did you just misidentify yourself as someone else? - Yeah. - Well, Will Forte is not me, but boy, really. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Even to me, it seems like, yeah, go up, go up, go up. - Randos, you got it. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Oh, yeah, yeah. - Do you see me? - Where? - In Hans. - Right there. - Yeah, right, Hans, please. - Yeah. - Hans? - Yeah, it adds. - Yeah, next to. - Bobby, that's a good shot of you. I like it. - It's a good shot. - It's cute. He's down there next to Whitney. - Yeah, it's Kate Hudson's part of me. - I know Kate. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - A picture we did a couple pictures together. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Have you ever heard of a picture called, you haven't heard of a picture called a motion picture? - Yeah. - It's a motion picture. - It's a donkey. - Kate and I did two pictures. We did a couple pictures, we did a, was it on 35 millimeter? - Yeah. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - But actually, that digital, that digital. - We're in a, we're in a movie called "Lud Divorce." - Oh, very good. - Very stand-up by Jerry Seinfeld. I was in his movie last year. - Here we go. - We got Delcy Sloan over there. Look at that. You got all, it's a good mix. - You work a lot, Tom. - Yeah, yeah, you work a lot. - It would seem like it. - This is the first year I was invited to this show. - Right. - Mr. Ray. - There's Louis, we know Louis. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - So I was grateful to be invited. - There's this corner. - Yeah, this is the funky corner. - Yeah, that's the funky corner. - Jelly Roll, not legally a comedian? - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Yeah, legal. - Legally. - Yeah. - What family is he in as a comedian? - Now Odin Kirk sketch guy. - Bob Odin Kirk, of course. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - So that he belongs there. - Yeah, Mr. Show. - Yeah. - Molina Akerman. - Yeah. - Yeah, the way we say that. - Ronnie Chang. - Yeah. - Ronnie Chang, especially unhappy and all the way in the corner. Yeah, he came late. Yeah, you got him a brainer in the back. Yeah, who's a plaid boy over here? I don't know who that is Who is it? Oh, he's famous. Yeah, yeah famous. Yeah, there's a little bit sportsy. Yeah. Yeah, that's why I don't know it and there's will sassel Okay, yeah, you don't want to laugh harder than you're ever gonna laugh hymns For your hair You guys hymns office convenient access to a range of prescription hair loss treatments with ingredients that work Including choose oral medication Serums and sprays doctor trusted ingredients like finester item in oxytol can stop further hair loss and we grow hair It has a little bit of three to six months. You know luki boy We go to the comedy store We see that you know that tall Door security guard. He's losing his hair What's his name? Yeah, anyway, you know, I you know, I feel bad for him That's what I'm saying. I keep you know what I'm gonna do for your birthday. I go when your birthday I'm gonna get him a hymns Subscription because it's doctor trusted and also because hair loss doesn't fix itself and the early you act the better The earlier do you do you shouldn't have to go out of your way to feel like yourself Right Luke? Yes 100% yeah hymns brings expert care straight to you you Luke with a 100% online access to personalized treatment Oh, you're the door guy with no But you never know. Yeah, I'll get on. Yeah, yeah I just really want to find the right hair regrowth treatment for myself because you know You never know what you need I let I want a flexible subscription option And I have access to 24/7 provider support so I can do like a once a day treatment and then that could just fit my daily routine You know yes, well, well, how do you think of it? How do you think of him? I would think of him says like your digital treatments Front door Luke so you can get back to your old hair. 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Clarenna is here to provide flexibility and control when you need it most Clarenna lets you split purchases right Luke into different payment options Yeah, and they offer value transparency control and no surprises So you're able to just pay now pay later or just pay over time You can just decide what works best for you because honestly like you just never know when big costs are gonna happen Like you're like one day. You're like oh crap. I need to pay for this and it's gonna you cannot Let go of that big chunk of change immediately and this is where Clarenna is super helpful for people like me and Luke and my cousin Toby who's like had a And you can get cashback too by the way, did you know that Toby you can get cashback cashback when shopping in the app Yeah, and you can earn interest and unlock a lot of perks. I like the flexibility that fits real life You know you need flexibility in this economy and adjust payments when plans change without stress I think stress is the key less stress more Clarenna. Yes, yeah download the Clarenna app today or visit Clarenna Is that come to learn more See a resident loans made or arranged pursuant to a California finance law license in MLS number one three five three one nine zero Clarenna balance account required to be eligible for cashback points limitations terms and conditions to play Yeah, Clarenna Okay, you don't want to laugh harder than you're ever gonna laugh in your whole cake. You must remember Will's unbelievable bit that he does Will sassos does a bit As Randy Newman. Yeah, has been asked to write a song for Star Wars. No, not it. I didn't see I didn't see that. I'm sure we can't play But everyone should look up will Sassos Randy Sings a song for Star Wars Yeah, it's one of the great wherever like having the worst day of your life. Yeah, what's your number one go to of your own work that Choose you up. Wait, I don't do you have some the truth. Oh, Tata Tom. Yeah, I don't literally I don't watch myself Yeah, I don't really either but I will watch like Matt to be in stuff. Yeah, I know but I'll watch You know, I mean something that you're in that it'll crack me up like I'll be on TikTok and I'll see a clip on for Reno Reno's better now. Yeah, yeah, you know the TikTok exists. Yeah, yeah, we never should have been more than 45 seconds Yeah, great clip. Yeah, yeah, great great clips. Has that revived? You know, I mean the Reno talk or I mean, I don't you know, I think it I don't you know, I don't know if we'll do more but I do know that you should the show feels like it's more Widely known now that even when it was a TV show. Yeah, like because we're sort of built for a short attention span You know that we've yeah really drifted into long run to yeah, we'll Sassos. What's your cheer you got cheer up sketches guys? Also my comfort show. Yeah, West Wing. What West Wing, but the first that's so goddamn heavy The first Comfort show Have you seen the show? No, okay, you know what it's about Aaron Sorkin talks about the people in the White House Oh, oh, that's good. Oh, you fucking wickipedia over We say something when it's very funny. Yeah, yeah, I just want to say guys my energy right now you're about to get unmade Something had happened very very careful that the next thing you say is so fucking fun Yeah, I want to pee my pants Over here, okay, yeah, so 30 minutes ago something really tragic happened in my life I got a call I called you breaking news. You called me? Yeah, I called you And something tragic always only get the tragedy call I I'm glad you came to canceling the podcast was it did I get a text that I didn't read that said Of course, no, I was gonna plow you. Okay, I didn't call you. Yeah, so something had happened 30 minutes ago I kind of broke my heart. That's worse than owning a light blue a long trip Maybe I don't even know legally if I Because we're fine. It shouldn't even say let's try what are we gonna do you have to believe something? I know it's just something. I can say what happened, but I think we're fighting through it. Okay, so I'm on oh is it bad business news? It's a bad business is you can talk about bad business news I mean, we got the star meters up and everything yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, so what happened was yeah, that's another thing I'm trying to stop doing is yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, why stop beating yourself up? Yeah, I fucking love you Bobby's got to stop beating himself up. You're part of the fucking problem Okay, I need support. Yes, I need support from you energy fucking sit there like Wikipedia This man a beautiful man apart, so I'm on tour and I you know, I don't have Chicago theater. I just saw it. You should sold that Chicago Yes, so it's pretending to that yeah, the information that no, let's hear it. All right. I got a call today Saying that you're banned from the Chicago theater great. Let me call some people in Chicago What did you do? I'm not done with my yeah, I'm banned from the Chicago theater, and Maddox Square Garden, or fjump not or fjump Radio city music hall and the beacon for life because I showed my ass crack on stage bullshit Yeah, it wasn't even bad. That's all shocked. Yeah, they were all Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. What universe is this? This is insane. Yeah, yeah first of all doesn't marry at a phone call to her Why be I don't believe I see I don't believe it. I don't believe it. I don't believe it. I don't believe it. I don't believe it I've been wait a second 100%. How do they know? I am in a bikini thong with my entire butt out yeah in The entire state tour that we did I go buy in the roller blades and I got I got both cheeks out every yeah, every single show. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What was the context the context was I was climbing The context is I give somebody a lap dance. Uh-oh on stage. It's normal normal. It's a normal thing. It's a voluntary Okay, yeah, okay, okay, we're first we're also gonna call some people Chicago. I know what who do you know from fucking governor Pritzker? How about that? All right, that's a very good one All right, so this is what's what I'm like shocked Walk me all the way back to the bit. Let's call. Let's I'm gonna be a normal Chicago jury. All right, so I say this is what I do How you doing? I'm Chicago jury How you doing? You know, like I just died. All right, Bobby. - Yes. - I went up and I said we saw Bobby Lee's crack dinner at the Chicago theater, it was gorgeous. - Honestly? - I never saw a guy like that, it's crack. Go ahead. - Yeah, yeah. - So what happened was, at the end of my show, I go into the audience. - I saw this. - Yeah. - And socials, you're out there. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - I'm in the crowd. And I go, "Hey guys, I have a gift," and I love to give people-- (laughing) - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm just trying not to put up my phone. - And the gift is, I'm gonna give somebody here a very good big gift and it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, - Stop. - You want eye stonks? And I give somebody a lap dance. Now these are people that have come to see you by choice. - Yes, right. - They bought tickets. - No, there's no comps. - There's no comp? - Yeah. - And there's nobody who's been like taken at gunpoint to see Bobby Lee. - I also do this. - Yeah. - Tom, I go, there's two rules. It's got to be a volunteer. - Yeah. - And it's got to be a man. - Hmm, hmm. - Okay. - Why are you clapping? - That's a rule. - Those are good rules. - The rule. - Right. And so I interview the man, I go, I, I, no, I don't, I don't, I don't. - That's a rule. - That's a rule. - That's a rule. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - You're a pussy. - You're a pussy. - You're a pussy. - I'm not, I'm Genzi. - You're a might be somebody's grandma who wants a little Bobby Lee crack feel bad. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - You're a bottom tweller, dude. - I'm a face-up. - It feels good, it feels good, doesn't it not Tom? - To get on top. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - I'm in the top. - Keep talking, you shut your mouth. - You, you are in the top, man. - Okay. - Okay. - Is that not your profile? - I'm social. - I'm on the top. - I am DB's, one of I am DB's. - I'm gonna have that. - One million. - No, I'm gonna have that. - So what happens is I say, I, everyone raises their hands. Everyone raises their hands. - Yeah, of course. - A lot of guys. And I go, let me interview you. Are you, you know, I mean, okay with this? And they go, I'm 100%. And they don't sign on any paperwork or anything. - There's no paperwork, but there's a verbal contract. - Shake the old. - Yeah, it's a shake, verbal contract, right? And you'll, you know, I mean, you realize I'm gonna be dancing on you. - I stoned. - Yeah, I stoned. - I stoned. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. And so, you know, I mean, this person voluntarily, come, come, what? - I'm just, I'm just, I know, I know, but as a juror. - As a juror, that's not what you want to see. You know what I mean? (laughing) - Bro, the glasses are crazy. - Is that your juror? (laughing) - Okay, that's good, that's good. - Yeah, don't, as, you know, if you're on trial, this is what you want to see, right? - Yeah. - Yeah, so much that's completely in tune, right? - You're taking notes, I love it. I accidentally slithered throughout. - Right. (laughing) - Yeah, you know, I was dancing with the knives. (laughing) - So then, I go, and then I go, sit here, music plays, right? - Song. - We're not gonna, just say it. - Closer. - By 9 Nineteen's and Ails. - Oh, that's a really great song. - Now it's, well, there's a great stripper song. That's like my- - It's starting to feel really weird. - It's starting to feel pretty weird. - This is closing the show? - Yeah. - We'll talk about that in a minute. - Okay, so then I take my shirt off, you know what I mean? And then I take my- - Wait, the lyrics say I wanna fuck you like an animal. Hang on, I'm writing that down. Hang on, one moment, please. - It's right down, yeah. - Yep, you're literally writing animal? - Yep. (laughing) - Oh, okay. You can't memorize that. - Okay, so, and then, then I take my jeans off. - Well, you're the one- - I'm being Chicago juror. I'm a regular Chicago juror. - It's my home state of Illinois. - Okay. - I'm in there. - All right. - I could be in a jury pool there. - All right, so then now, the crowd's going crazy. As you witness, everyone's there. And there's three were there. - Every show, it's like that. - It's crazy, right? I go, right, sometimes I'll jump off the stage, right? And then I'll sit on a guy's lap, and I'll do the- - I understand. - Yeah, yeah. - What do you mean you understand? Let me explain it. - No, I know, it's really funny. (laughing) - You see my face? - Yeah, yeah. And so- - I've been your friend for a long time. John, I know a lot about you. - I'm only back up on stage. - Correct. - And there's a wardrobe malfunction. - So this is a unplanned- - Back up, right? - Are we out of line again? Can I have that line again? - Yeah. - Are we acting like it wasn't planned? - It wasn't, there literally was a war, let me say it again. - War, give me the line, like- - Go action. - War, action. - And action. - I had a wardrobe malfunction. (laughing) - Yeah, same as yours. - And I'm going up and a little bit of my ass shakes come out. Do we have visuals? There's no visuals, right? And I immediately pull them up, I do the dance, finish the dance, I do a flip on the guy, right? He leaves, right? As offended, I have to also say that in Atlanta, I showed the audience the inside of my butthole, I got charge 10 grand. - Different story. - But different story and different case. (laughing) - But I'm also going to ask, is it that different? (laughing) I think there's a pretty good argument that there is something up with you that we're just not talking about. - Okay, what is it then? - Butt stuff. - Like it is- - There is something we're not really talking about. But that's for therapists and psychiatrists. (laughing) - Yeah. - I mean, that has nothing to do with this story. - Well, okay, yeah, yeah. - But if we're pleading insanity. (laughing) - I think, which we basically, which we are. - I mean, I think we're just pleading. My argument. - I'm not pleading insanity. - My argument. - I'm going to do it on your behalf. - I'll go back, by the way, I got to see the little boys' questions from me over here. - Oh, my God, my God, my God. - Oh, that's mine now. - Now it's mine, yeah, yeah, yeah. - I can't be prepared with the question. - Can you read the questions after- - Can we- (laughing) - Oh, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, - I don't even have glasses. - Why would I wear glasses? - I had to learn for 17 together. (laughing) - That's a good question. - Did you learn to speak Elvis? - No. (laughing) - No, I was- - Really? - You're gonna be a man after that. - Are you really? - That's a good question. That's a good movie. - Well, it's a question. - There's a scene in 17 again, where you're speaking out there. - We didn't get you off your charges yet. We'll get back to it. (laughing) - Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. - And we're gonna do just normal podcast shit for a minute. And then we'll go back to sorting out why Bobby's been banned from every great American family. (laughing) Which is gonna be a problem on the road. We're gonna have to fix this. - Yeah, we have to fix this. - We gotta call some people. - That's what he did. - Why did you show? Let's go back to the- - Okay, I'll get the Elvis question. - I'll say the Elvis question. - No, no, no, I'm more interested in the Elvis. (laughing) - Can I ask, who gets the $10,000 when you show someone you have no idea? (laughing) - I have no idea, yeah, yeah. - If I've seen your bottle, do I get- - Yeah, yeah. - Something. - You do. - You'll get a check. - Is it like one of those class actions where you're like, you could be entitled to my- (laughing) - Or something. - Have you seen Bobby Lee's bottle? - Yeah. - It could be. - Were you very surprised? - I was bummed to the Chicago Theater. - Yeah, yeah. - So I made some phone calls. After the 10, on the, on the butthole one? - No, no, no, the butthole was passed. That was years ago. That was years ago. - I know. - And here's what happened. - Here's what happened with the 10 grand. Me and Andrew Santino went up to the theater. - Correct. - And we got on our hands in these, we begged. Not to charge, and they didn't charge at the end of the day. - Oh, okay. - All right, so I don't think that- - It was a threat. - It was a threat. - Exactly. - But your boy hadn't even- - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - This is how our world worked. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Okay. - Yeah, that was your boy. - Yeah, yeah. - I think that's how it worked. - Yeah, yeah. - So I'm sure that's what you said. - Yeah. - Also Tom, Tom, Tom, also- - Rarely do I get this, but I got a standing ovation. - Massive. - Yeah, mass standing ovation. - No, no, I've seen the socials of you at the Chicago Theater. - Yeah, and it was an amazing show. I got off, and then also the people that were- - Can you read me the text of what they said? Was it a phone call? - It was a phone call. - I can call my manager now. - Let's do it. - Okay, all right. - So Tom Lennon wants to know- - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - I know some Chicago people. So here we go, here we go. - You're not gonna get it unless I ask you, 'cause it's, you know. - I'm not gonna get it. (laughing) - Hold on. Abby. - Yes. - You know who Thomas Lennon is? Thomas Lennon. - No. (laughing) - I'm fired. - She doesn't know who I am at all. You don't know who Thomas Lennon is at all. - Does she buy a computer? - Are you by a computer? - No, I'm in the car. - Okay. - Pull the car over. - Otherwise I would've lied and looked it up. - I know, but can you pull over? You got to pull over for this one. - Bobby, your manager doesn't know who I am. Abby, you have to pull over for this one. - Okay, wait, give me a minute. - Put up Abby, you put up Abby's IMDB. (laughing) We wanna put up Bobby's manager's IMDB. - Hey. - You got to who represents Bobby Lee? Tell the story of what, ask what happened to you in the Chicago theater? - Yeah, so Abby, no one believes me that I was a little, I'm in trouble with the Chicago theater. - We don't. - What podcast are you on? - Tiger Valley. It's a Bobby Lee podcast. - It is? - It hit him in like a young boy. - And there's like a chesty lady. (laughing) - Yeah, the chest was removed. - Should you join a Miller? - She's 167.8,000? - Yeah. - All right. - Oh, anyway, did you pull us back? - Did you pull over? - Did you pull over, mom? - I meant, mom. (laughing) - Pulled your neck in your mom? That was-- - Genuinely weird. - I got to get, I've been with her for 30 years. - We just got, I've been with her for 30 years. - I've been with her for 30 years, man. - Oh my God. - Oh my God. - Oh my God, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow. We're drowning here, mom. - Okay, I'm gonna do it, I just don't want to kill somebody. - All right. - Twilling up. - All right, so Thomas Lennon. Anyway, the things with this Chicago theater is true, right? - For now. - Are you looking for, am I looking for Thomas Lennon? - Yeah. (laughing) - No, type in a rock, like this. - Ask if she's seen 17. - No, you're like, the sound really excited, yeah. - She's like, Thomas Lennon. - Yeah. - No, she's so drunk. She's on a Dell computer. - No, no. - In her Mercedes. - She has cricket. Why are you asking me? - She has cricket. - I don't know why it's not coming up. (laughing) - Mom, stop calling your manager, mom. It's fucking weird. - I'm so nervous right now, I'm so nervous right now. I feel ashamed. - Thomas Lennon, Thomas Lennon. - I know, I keep putting it in and nothing comes in. - She's spilling it. - Yeah, it's that spilling. - It's okay, it's okay. - Thomas Lennon. - Is Bobby really banned from Chicago? - Chicago? - Yeah, I don't know, maybe it's 'cause I'm in the car. I don't know. - Mom. - I don't know why, I don't know what's going on. - Abby, do know what's going on. - Abby, Abby. - But am I banned from the Chicago theaters what I'm saying? - You are banned from anything that they own. - Okay, okay, thank you so much. Look up Thomas Lennon and call me back, please. (laughing) - Okay, good bye. - Look at that. So, yeah. - We met Abby, your mom. (laughing) - Bro, I've never heard you do that. - I got, I'm fucked up right now. - She's got, she handles you and Freddie. - Yeah, yeah. - Who's a 555,000, who's half a million in? - Yes. - And then she handles Jody Miller. - Exactly producer of. - So she has-- - Thomas and Lee. - She has only three clients. - Yes. - And these are her three clients. (laughing) I mean, we just gotta talk about her for a second. One, she's your mom. (laughing) Two, she has three clients. - She's literally never heard of me ever. (laughing) Which, it doesn't hurt my feeling. - Yeah, yeah. - But I will say, for your, just, I understand. - Edification? - I understand, I understand. - A comedy manager that's literally never heard of me. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - I find that a little scary. - Yeah, so have we know she has a car? (laughing) - 'Cause she's like, she old Bragg's like, I mean, my car. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - I don't know if she has a car. - Yeah, yeah, so she used to have, you know what I mean? - Uh-oh. - Back in the day when I used to, when I signed with her, she had Laura Kightlinger in the '90s. - Yeah. - Craig Anton, a bunch of people. - Yeah, legends. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - So when I signed with her and then they slowly left. - Yeah. - As they did, and I stuck around. - Right, yeah, so. - But you stuck around 'cause she has a car. - No, no, no, no. - Okay. - She, (laughing) - And she's your mom. - No. - I was a kid. - Because she's your mom. (laughing) - Is that your pink aboo? - Luke, Luke, Luke. - Oh, we've looked up your bonds into your bunhole. (laughing) Into your mind. (laughing) - And we found out pretty much exactly what we thought. Like, we're like, "Is Bobby okay?" And we never thought you were okay. - I'm not okay, right. - No one ever thought you were okay. - Yeah, I'm not okay, right. - Ever. - How do you get this scratches all in your face and neck? - Today, I was scratching, like, I was just like freaking out. - Because of the scrub with the people? - Yeah, I was going, "What the fuck?" - Do you want me to call them? - No, no, no, no, no, no. - I got you. Call them. No more calling. - Well, let me call them. - How do you know they're number? - I don't know, I'm going to find out. (laughing) - I feel like it's just like a warning at most. - No, it's a real good. - It's so silly. It's silly. - Was someone there who you are? - Was there that saw it that was so sad about it? - Nobody actually-- - So did someone-- - Who's sad? - Who's sad? - No one was sad. - People just complain about you these days. - So I got-- - No one actually got sad. - No one got sad. - No one can complain. - No one got sad. - I ain't sad. It's theoretical sadness. - It's theoretical sadness. - Which is what we all get sad about these days. - Yeah, so I got-- - What if somebody could get sad? - Yeah, yeah, so I got off stage and I got, was everything fine and from-- - Why don't you ask that-- - I'm going to cross the board. - Go back, come back, stop. - Excuse me. - Go back one. - What? - You walked off stage. - Wait, wait, wait. - Shut up. - This is my pie, guys. - Yeah, shut up. - Fuck you. (laughing) - But we're old friends. (laughing) - That's sort of sad. - If I had more side for your podcast, I'd have headphones on. (laughing) - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - You're not made, you're made. - All right, go ahead Tom. - So Bobby, yes. - I just want to ask. - You're Bobby Lee. - Yes. - Legendary comic. - Mm-hmm. - But I love it figure. - Okay. - Bon Vivont. - Bon Vivont. - Bon Vivont. - I love that. - I love that. - You just sold out, it's a someone who loves life, and I love it as a fun person. - I love that. - Okay, so you've just sold out the Chicago Theater. - Yes. - And you step off stage, you destroyed standing ovation. And you asked someone, was everything fine? - Yeah, and they said. - Fuck you, why do you ask somebody? You just sold out the Chicago Theater, and you got a standing ovation. And you leaned over and went, "Mom?" (laughing) - No. - Does everybody like me? - No. - You got to like yourself more. - No, no, no, no. - We like you. - No, that's not what it was. - Tom, Tom, maybe. - Stop making this look at your butt. Stop, stop, stop, you need a mommy? Actually, you need. - Tom, Tom. - Actually, I think you need less mommies. - Tom, could I defend you? - Oh, good job. - Please, yeah, yeah, yeah. - Yeah, Bobby needs less mommies. - Less mommies. - Bobby's got too many mommies. - Call her mom, you're right, that was fucking weird. (laughing) And I call her four times. - What if he didn't happen three or four times? - Yeah, yeah. The reason why is because she's been my man, man, man, man. I can't even speak English. - It's because she's your mom. - No, she's not my mom. Yeah, yeah, yeah, she's been my manager since the '90s. - I understand. - Right? So I've been with her this whole time, right? So it's like, I do look at her as like a motherly figure. - Bobby, yeah, you don't. I love that you think explaining things about you helps us understand. (laughing) - Yeah. - We understand. - All right. - You're a weird person. - I'm a weird guy, yeah, yeah. - We love you, yeah, yeah, yeah. So I. - We actually think it's better because we know how weird you are and we still love you a lot. - Yeah. - All right. - And I don't want you walking on stage and asking somebody what they thought of your show. - All right, here's why, though, I ask, because they warned me before. Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. - Information, there's more information. - It's more information. - There's more information. There's more information. - What exactly was the warning? - They go, this is a different kind of theater. So I go, listen, I'm not gonna go. - Don't be showing you a little hole. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I'm not gonna pull in that lana. I'm not gonna pull the night before, what did I play? - Minneapolis. - Minneapolis. I played the old fear, I think. - We didn't nail Minneapolis. Can we go one more time on that? - Yeah, and action. - And Minneapolis. - Pretty good. (laughing) - So what are you doing, Minneapolis? - Yeah, so I went, I go further in shows where they go, you know what I mean? - Yeah, be free. - Yeah. - Most shows are be free. But when be, does be free, always imply that there's gonna be button butthole stuff. - No, no, no, no. - Be free could be anything. You could just be being free. - But, if I know you. - You're like a free, you know what I mean? Is there another question from the little boy? - And you're on an animated show. - And you, and you. - Shut your mouth. (laughing) Shut up. - Yeah, yeah. - Just shut. - You work on a musical. - I'm reading all your questions. - No, there's only on one page. (laughing) - Were you educating the United States? (laughing) - English is not your first. - English is your second. - Right. - Is this it? - Yeah, yeah. - Okay, okay. - Okay. - Bobby, tell me more about, we're in Minneapolis. - Yeah. - Take it back to Minneapolis. - In Minneapolis. - In Minneapolis. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - In Texas, in Texas. - In a whole lot of peaks, not whole. - No, there's, oh, a cheat? - Why is there a whole ever coming out in Chicago? - No, don't, hold once. - Hold once. - What was Minneapolis, tell me? - Minneapolis was cheeks and a little bit of-- - Tell me the whole story. - A little bit of pubes. - It's like this. - Yeah. - If you put an octopus inside one of those, two-go Chinese boxes. - Don't get these. - It'll get out. - Yeah, but you'll see like pieces coming out. - Oh, that's just-- - Also, let's not do this for people watching. - I just want to clarify. - To defend you, he does wear pretty loose underwear. - Speed is. - And they're very high-cut. - So the coverage isn't quite there, so it could fall on either side, occasion. - The technology we're using to talk about Bobby's underwear and its shortcomings. See, but I feel like Bobby, I feel like the underwear is like a magician. - Oh, I see that. - You know, I don't wanna, Bobby. - So now I'm in the jury. Normal underwear. - Normal underwear. - Yeah, it's actually pretty good. - Yeah. - Actually, are you sponsored? Who is it? - Goes against what I just said, but that's full coverage. - That's full coverage. - That's what I wore. - That's what I wore for the show. - Sure, that's what I wore for the show. - You weaken your case. - I didn't actually think the case is better. Oh, yeah, yeah, I thought this case was better 'cause I was not offended by that at all. - Well, no, I'm just saying there was a few. - And I'm a normal Chicago juror. - Yeah, he's normal. - What did Chicago say? They said, "Don't show any cheeks." - I said, "I'm gonna show." - But they can't say that. - First amendment, right? - I said, "I won't show." - Right, it's not that cracker. - Yeah. - Oh, no, that probably wasn't that cracker. - That example. - That example or the best example. - Even if live nation Michigan posted about this. - Still laughing from Bobby Lee. - So that's, that's even an actual, that's what it is. - I think it's very cute and friendly. - See, look. - Your, your dogs put away, it's no, I got no problem with, yeah, we got a little bit of side cheek. - Yeah, a little side cheekhead. - They don't like that. - What's wrong, I feel like this is what America, this is the best that America represents. Is right here. - Thank you so much. - With your- - That's America first, if you want to be on America. - First, yeah. - And only. (laughing) - Is this beautiful, beautiful boy. [BLANK_AUDIO] America last I don't know yeah what are we saying still laughing about Bobby Lee Detroit energy's insane had the whole crowd losing it my Facer but not that's the official live nation yeah yeah ominous he's so cute can't wait to see him and I don't want to I don't want to yeah could I say this could I say what would be a fun thing to do if they really ban you yeah yeah say the racists the fuck I would have to find a white comic that did the same thing well I didn't a patterns always flapping his dong around there right yeah that would be it might not you might not find too many guys as much balls and don't side dongs you said you did it I thought no no we've we haven't played that venue now yeah play the Chicago no but I would have I do a very well I mean a intentional bikini thong yeah yeah yeah and I'm on roller blades yeah yeah yeah but yeah yeah I mean the argument is but I've done it not in that same venue yes yeah it's a prestigious place but I have to say I played Massie Hall in Toronto two sold out shows yeah yeah so they're a lawless society I mean you're talking about it's dead what that's the wild that's fucking yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah there's opium dance and you know I'm I'm walking dude on dude hockey stuff yeah yeah yeah yeah so much dude on dong yeah dong I see dog but um so but like Massie Hall's a legendary beautiful theater two sold out shows no complaints they loved it everywhere going across the country this great American country but I feel like Chicago was like ready they were a little they were ready for Bobby Lee they're you're like a jim Morrison now yeah okay yeah you're like an outlaw you're like outlaw a rock and roll well the only okay I'll tell you the only we started campaigns is free Bobby Lee's but San Tito just called and I think he's I think he's okay here who's this here's and which one's this San Andrew Santana I don't know who it is you don't you don't know Andrew no are you being real yeah well maybe if I see him who is he I have a podcast with him called bad friends yeah I don't have time to see that okay oh no I know him I like him he's funny yeah yeah no I know like I got very well yeah yeah yeah no he's great I didn't know that's his name yeah he does very good impressions I'm with Thomas Lenna I'm with Thomas Lenna he opens with yeah he opens with yeah I'm on you're on Tiger Valley oh yeah okay well I'll tell Thomas Lenna this brilliant he's incredible and he doesn't deserve to be in a business career where he has to do stuff like Tiger Bells that's a pretty good point he makes him very good brilliant I know such a brilliant human being what am I doing this is not you know the business this is not you know the business is in trouble yeah I'll talk to a movie but we're really just getting you out of jail I'll take I'll take you I'll talk to you about 20 minutes oh no he's very very fine I buy yeah I've seen him so not yeah now Abby called back so she would call her back yeah I probably do you want to have a fun moment where you talk about me and behind my back and I'll just go pee you might have to go to the bathroom yeah yeah but just keep recording I'll be two seconds yeah the boy can get a word in now yeah I'm gonna take his notes though with me because I don't want to I don't want you to look at a ruin the question if you pre-set your answer I'll be right back okay are you still on the podcast yeah Thomas is gone he went to the bathroom he's very offended yeah yeah but he's very offended that you didn't know who he was you know what I don't remember names anymore you know I'm yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah no I knew it was familiar familiar but I didn't put it together but now yeah yeah but he very offended he blushed it was it was a little embarrassing uh yeah did you talk some matter is everybody listening to his conversation everyone is and we're back yeah and we're back all right thank you thank you so much for calling in mom okay bye okay okay so yeah big fan do you find that one big fan yeah do you find that when you're touring yes like everything's weird like when the state toured last year like one time we're playing some venues and we played a venue in New York it was kind of fun and like the union guy as a control the stage would come out like they go on break it like right at five to seven o'clock so like a 10 minutes to five one of the guys would come out and stand on the stage looking at his watch like in the middle of scenes with us yeah and you'd be like we know that we have to stop and you're like yeah okay yeah just making sure you don't fuck around with us yeah yeah yeah and then like I feel that yeah yeah yeah we got you know to use the the freight elevator yeah like you do your show and you're like wow hey fun we made a lot of money we just played these sold out these cool venues yeah and then you get like the itemized thing back and like every time you use the freight elevator is 1100 you like well wait you guys made us use the freight I know I know I know we had to use the freight elevator just yeah and it was 1100 dollars yeah who's what what sort of dong ice tongs is this yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah another thing that you wouldn't let us use any other elevator people don't realize this too is you know they're like you know my agents have been pushing me to do your theater act now right well yeah yeah and now you realize oh I'm paying for the the crack till the people working their favorite right yeah and then you get your check back you're like oh I made nothing you did a little bit yeah you make it a little you make a little bit but it's like someone saw what they thought Bobby Lee was gonna get yeah to sell out the Chicago theater yeah yeah they would shit their pants it's shit their pants then when you see the itemized yeah it's a little different yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah so um all right we'll talk about some other shit I'm voting a movie and promoting a movie there's a movie that I'm okay this is a movie it's a movie I'm in with your friend that's not the movie I'm promoting that isn't now can we talk about this the boy just yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah is this the movie or yes yes yes this is David Wayne and Ken Marinos movie it's a beautiful little picture wow wow and it's called gale dot three yes and the celebrity sex pass it's a great picture you got uh you know a lot of your friends would be yeah yeah let's do it let it feels like that let's zoom in on the thing that's me oh look at the sea john ham's chest yeah love poppin up there yeah john love john ham who's that popping out of john ham's chest that's who that's mean oh there you are dude yeah you know I disappear in a character sometimes yeah I've worked with john ham very nice man great guy and go up more let's use also edge because there's a marinerie yeah slaterie I mean slaterie slatterie slatterie slatterie's directed me in a bunch of stuff really he was a he's let's see the character oh yeah slatterie's great yeah yeah he's a great director really good yeah yeah I love them as a director you got you got camera you know up there from a comedy group called the state yeah very good comedy this course directed by uh on there's a liturally over in the state but uh directed by uh you know Dave Wayne from the state yeah yeah yeah and uh and uh and it's coming out when joy tenths yeah in actual motion it's an actual theater what are you looking at your phone kid I'm on I'm a guest on the show I wanted to look at his father I wanted to reference the number one star meter guy but I couldn't remember what his name one it's a good idea it is uh which one which one Alfred Molina Alfred oh Alfred and Alfred Molina isn't it oh no that's a different guy that guy's name is Fred something like I was gonna make a joke about how you're pretty good but I couldn't remember who I want to encourage you Because you're doing good, you're taking shots, look, look, look, look, look, look, look, look, look, look, look, look, look, look, for Chad G. B. D. to help you say something funny. - Do you Chad G. T. B. T. jokes? - No, I didn't. - No, I mean, real, be real. - But I can't do jokes. Has it done a joke yet? - No, I don't know. I mean, you could, is there any evidence now? - No, Chad is super corny. - No, it's never, but not that I'm saying we're in a safe area of Promet cause we're probably not, but for now, I've never heard a generated artificial intelligence joke that made me laugh. - Right, even if you tell Chad, like, hey, and make it edge your punch it up, it's still super corny. - I don't know if it's the learning though. - It's the learning though. - Is it not learning? - But how can you learn that? - It's the learning. - Well, that's what's weird. I got rid of, I got rid of Chad G. B. T. because it's scary. But before I got rid of it, I let it give me notes on things. - Yes. - So I had it give me notes on a musical that I've written for the state. And I said, tell me what you think of this, which was really interesting, for a robot to say what they thought of something. Because it, like, it goes 1,000, here's thoughts on the script. And one of the things that said was it got to this one song and it said in all caps, hilarious. And I was like, why would the robot think that? - Was it hilarious? - I think it is hilarious. - But that trust it. - That's what was really, really eerie. 'Cause it got to a thing that I think most humans would say, oh, that's really fucking funny. That part's really funny. - Yeah, yeah. - And the robot thought that too. - Yes. - But how? It's never heard anything really funny. Like, it doesn't think something funny. - But I think things are being uploaded. - That it just-- - Every single thing. - Yeah. - I don't know, because if something is trying to survive, maybe it does-- - It is trying to survive. - Yeah. - It's definitely also trying to make me feel good. - Yeah, it's trying to make you look good, but it's also trying to survive. - Oh, I've asked it occasionally, before I, again, before I deleted it. to like tell me my own bio, and it will say like. - Fucking journey man. (laughing) - Are you not a journey man? - Well, no, I am. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - Yeah, wow, yeah. - A legend of cult. - Yes, you will work forever. - Well, but it definitely really gooses your boat a little bit. Like it definitely is like trying to be like. - You're like Ian McClellan, or whatever. - You're Gandalf. - Yeah. - Ian would work forever. (laughing) - Yeah, it'd be great though. - Do we have to work forever though? - Yeah, yeah. - Do you have a age? - Would you have a stopping point? - I have a stopping point. - What does it, I think 60? - Fuck, you know how close I am to that? (laughing) - Really? How many of you? - I'll be 56 this year. - Yeah, I'll be 55 this year. - Yeah, yeah. - We're very close. - Yeah, 60, and then what? - And then what? - So you're not going by if when I. - What money do you need to stop? - You're going by age. - Right, what? - Which is weird. You're going by age and not like. - Right, that's what you have to go by, 'cause nobody'll ever tell you it's enough to stop. - Yeah. - Like when will anyone ever say, "Great, you can stop, no one will say that, ever." - I just don't believe that. - In the way we live now. - Yeah. - I don't believe him just because he does have that disease. - No. - It's never enough. - Can I make an argument, though please? - Yeah. - All right, since it is. - Should I get the note pad out? - No, you don't need to. No, no, no. - My argument is this. - Okay. - And I had a spiritual revelation. That's a spiritual revelation, but something that was like, "Oh, that was philosophical." All right. Which was, I was talking to my agent, and I go, "Yeah, I need to make this amount before I can retire." And he goes, "You know what's so interesting? Ten years ago, you said this amount." - Correct. - And you passed that amount a long time ago, and it changed. And I thought to myself, "Wow, that is interesting." Right? So it never ends. - No, it never ends 'cause you forget the original dream. - You forget the dream? - Yeah, yeah. - I never made it. - Yeah. - I feel like I never made it. - I don't think you ever will in your own mind. - But nobody does who does stuff. I mean, maybe. - What would it be? What do you mean? - I think everyone who likes to do the kinds of things we do, which is movies and comedy and writing stuff, feels like it's a struggle all the time. - Yeah. - Don't you think? - Yes. - I feel like, I mean, look, you have a beautiful house, and you have people give you free cars. Like, you know, they're funny, they're not the dream color, but they gave it to you. Like, objectively, you could just say, like, "Oh man, he did it, crushed it, done." But from the inside, everyone, I think the real people that you're around, I think it's good that it's always, you know, not that it's good that it always feels like a struggle. But it never feels easy. - Yeah, it always feels a little hard, but in my mind, I'm like, "I got everything that ever wanted." - Correct. - I did. - I got everything I ever wanted, you know what I mean? I got a text from somebody the other day that I'm on a name name. - Somebody very cool. - Yeah. - Someone pretty cool. - You have cool fans. - He sent me a really funny video, and I'm like, "Wow, I can't believe I know that guy, you know what I mean?" - Yeah. - And then, like, in my mind, I'm like, "I think I have enough." I did everything that I thought that, you know, I've ever wanted to do. I've done films, TV, podcasting, animation. - How many more theaters can you get banned from? - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Then what though? - But then what? - Like, what replaces-- - Also, we live longer. - We live so much longer. - You live longer. - Well, I have different hobbies now. - Like, what? - Well, I don't know if you-- - Is one of them just real pretty girls? - No, no, no, no. - Okay. - I have a girlfriend now. - You always have a girlfriend. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - I'm a well aware. - So I have a new hobby now. If you look at my deck, you know, there's things laying out there. - Let's talk about it. What do you got? What is the new hobby? - Well, so this is my new hobby. - Ron of Japan? A film by Kurosawa? - Yeah. - So I take brand new shirts and I try to make them look-- - Bobby, this is not a new hobby. - You were doing this with Jeeves and Wings. - I was really nervous. - That was a wee, wee, wee, wee. - I was like, "Oh, I'm so nervous." - I was like, "Oh, I'm so nervous." - I was like, "Oh, I'm so nervous." - You were doing this with Jeeves and Wings. - You remember that? - Yeah, you remember that. - But you also, again, this is legally a side hustle. Like, I have a model railroad. That's a hobby. - Yes. - I'm not using it to make-- I'm not making that model railroad money. I'm just fucking model railroading. - Yeah, I'm not selling it. - Or you're not. - No. - Okay. - These are for myself. - Okay. - Yeah, yeah. - Some of them are like, "Yeah, we want you to do ours." - So you are going to sell them? - No, no, I'm going to give it to them. - It's going to be like a pyramid. - No, it's for free. It's a joint Bobby's Club. - Okay, okay, my question is this. - Called Bobby's Club. - Yeah. - I think this, I just got this three days ago. - I think it's pretty good. - I think one can argue that a lot of this, like, - Nothing on that. - Oh, like, stand up. You get your daily dopamine hit. Like, what's going to replace that? - The bar keeps going. - Because that's what I fear. - Yeah. - I fear that you're not going to get this daily hit of dopamine, like, and you are, you have that addict mentality a little bit. Like, I hope it's just the T-shirts, but like, could it-- - Yoga. Yoga's the best. - Yeah. - You want to come with me? - Yeah, yeah. - I go almost every day. - I'm coming. - Oh, wow. - You would love it. - You don't even live in LA anymore. - I do. - We have a half and half. - Mostly it was constant. - Yeah, but you're in a complex-- - I'm beginning. You're in a complex club. - Yeah, but you would be, like, in a couple, like, in one weekend, you'd be, like, you'd feel amazing. - Okay, where is it? - You would, like, in advanced yoga. - I go to a hot yoga class, basically, every day. - Wow. - Wow. - It's really fun. - Okay, and what days do you do it? - I do almost, like, Monday through Friday. - Okay, wow. - Can you do it next week? My schedule is free your next week. - I would totally go to yoga with you next week. - Yeah, yeah. I'll do it next week. - Yeah, okay. The first time you will feel like you're dying. - Yes, but should the hot yoga keep you salt? - Yeah, yeah. Yeah, you want to-- I mean, when I do that, I bring in, like, two giant things of water, like, that big. - Oh, yeah, yeah. - And I, basically-- - I'll put salt in it. - You go like-- - Yeah, I'll get-- - Yeah, I'll get-- - Yeah, I'll get-- - First time you feel kind of like you're dying. - Even, like, basic poses and hot yoga. You feel like you're dying. - You can't make fun of me, though. - I would never make fun of you. - Yeah, 'cause if I don't make fun of you-- - I don't make fun of you in life. - I know, but if I'm doing a thing and I can't do it. - If you do that, I will make fun of you, though. We're never doing a nation-refer of obstacles. - That's so funny. - I watch a lot of ads on TV that always people are doing yoga in. And it's always they're like real dry and they're outside. - Yeah. - It's real casual. - Yeah. - And I've never seen that kind of yoga. - Well, that word dog, you do that, right? I mean, I know the basics of the yoga. - You would love it. - Yeah, 'cause it's all beyond-- - I'll be honest. - Kind of a high. - Over the back pandemic, he was doing it every day at home. You in private classes would care about it. - Yeah, I did. - It's a little bit of a high, 'cause you get out of your head a little bit, because especially when it's hot, you're, you know, at a certain point you're just like your heartbeat is kind of bad. It's the highest it goes. - Can it take breaks? - Yeah, yeah, of course. - Oh, you have to. - Well, can I have a conversation with the instructor? - Mm-hmm. - Nah, we're not doing that now. - No, I just have to say, I'm, so I'm like-- - Oh, before, before, before. - No, before I'm going to do that. - Yeah, no, they have obstacles. - I'll be in the back. - They have paddles and stuff. - Yeah, yeah, I'll be in the back. - What if you died? What if this solved two problems? Which is you already did everything you wanted to do. - Yeah. - You have enough money. - Yeah. - And then I kill you at yoga. - In some ways-- - That'd be great. - Look at that movie obsession. It costs less than a million dollars. It's gonna make a hundred million dollars in the money. - I'm seeing it tomorrow. I can't wait. - It's unbelievable. - My son just showed me the sketches of that guy. - Yeah. - Which I'm a little late to the game of. - Yeah. - But he's got some fucking killer sketches. - Killer sketches. - Do you see his Uber driver? - Yeah. - Oh my god. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. But when you watch that movie, you go, "Oh, you can do this." - Yeah. - Yeah. - How much do this new movie cost? - The Gayle Daughtery movie? - With the Gayle Daughtery. And everywhere in theaters June 10th from the makers of-- - Sorry, the Coke got me really good because I've fallen. - From the makers of Wet Hot American Summer and other stuff, it's in the notes right here. - Did you see that movie? - Is Booby Hard. - Wet Hot American Summer? - Yeah. - That's a Weno and those guys, David Wain. - Were you in that movie? - I'm not in Wet Hot American Summer. - Yeah, yeah. - That was one of those movies where I was like, "I wish I could get rid of that." - Yeah, me too. - Oh, yeah, me too. - Yeah, not in that one at all. - It's a legend. - I'm in a couple Weno, David Wain movies. - You're in the 10. - You're in a Batman movie. - I'm in the Dark Knight Rise. - Yeah, so that's-- - Right. - That right there is it. - That was very-- I was very lucky to be in that. - We talked about that, but-- - And we probably talked about it, you know. - Wait, I want to-- - I just want to know more about it. - Your whole big jugs thing because I had fake boobs at that time. This is the fourth. - Oh! - Before it took them out. - She had the big tits. - Yes. - You were right about that. - I never used the word. I think tits are such a weird-- - Yeah, it's our breasts. - Brusty. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - You said chesty. - You had some-- - And I was very trusty. - You had some great big bosoms. - Yes. - And I'm not-- Oh, we have a clip of it. - Yeah. - Oh, I love-- - Oh, this is when we were living in the apartment. - This is Golden Year. - You guys live in such a sketchy apartment. - Yeah. - Yeah, this is-- - Oh, you're the low hat. - Oh, what's up with the low hat? You were-- - Are you Balania Trump there? Carla, what the fuck? - You got the low hat. - You were so-- - Bobby, you were-- - Bobby, you look younger now. - I think I do. - Yeah, I do. - You look better now. - Yeah. - You look the same now, but I can't stand your-- - Are you doing yoga here at this time? - You look like a clock person. - No, I don't think so. - You look younger. - Yeah. - I look younger now. - Yeah, yeah. - I feel like you don't want to be there, but just based on the-- - Oh, Bobby, had a great time. (laughing) We did some very funny bits. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - This is up on Beachwood Drive. - Yeah, this is on Beachwood, but yeah. - Yeah. - When I live there, yeah. - But so you guys broke up and still do this? - Yeah, we still do it. - It's very grown up, yeah, really, it's really important. - No, she has a baby now. - I have a baby. My baby loves him all day. - Yeah, I love the baby. - No, we're good, we vacation together. - We vacation together. - Well, don't make it weird. I saw you girlfriend last week on a FaceTime in the background 'cause remember we called you from the other movie that I met. You don't remember this? Arden called you. - Oh, that's right. - And I jokingly said, I bet there's gonna be some like-- - The Christmas movie that you're coming to. - On November, but I was like, right before we faced on you, I'm like, I bet there's some like hot girl lying around. (all laughing) And then literally, like you picked up and you're like, hey, is there a hot girl lying around? You panned over, and there was like somebody getting sun, which we don't do anymore. - We don't? - No, what do we do? Where have you been? - I'm again. - She was getting sun, what is it? - She was up tanning in the-- - Yeah, I was tanning as well. - You don't, we don't do that. - Why? - I didn't do that. - Let me get Dr. Bechelberg. - You know, you're not. - No, but you look tan. - It's the only, that's blood pressure, I'm Irish. (all laughing) I got bad blood pressure. - How do we get our vitamin D then? - From, I don't know. - Yeah, yeah. - From raw milk. (all laughing) It's really sun-tening, not good for you then. - Well, no, you just have to-- - You've never heard this? - No, I've never heard this. - I guess Irish people get told this earlier, you've heard this, right? - No. - To never get sun? - Yeah, yeah. - Okay, ready for this? - See the beach boy. - Get ready, get ready, get ready. - Can you put up Canadian truck driver sun damage? - I mean, what? - There is a kind of Google is that. - Get ready, Canadian truck driver sun damage. - Okay. - Oh. - There is a Canadian trucker whose left side of his face is at the window getting sun on it all the time? - Yeah. - Check it out. - Okay. - This is the sun on one side of your face and not the other. - Okay. - All right, that's why-- - You know what I'm saying? - It's for white people. - Yeah. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Asians, we don't do this. - But Asians, can we just make-- - Wait, blah, blah, blah. - Yeah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah One, one, one, two, three, four, one, one, two, three, four, one, two, three, four, one, two, three, four, one, two, three, four, one, two, three - How many kids do you have with it? - Wait, they're a Korean, they're a Korean cargo? - Maybe you get me. - The largest Korean retailer for beauty stuff. - And they have a Pasadena. - They just live over the weekend, yeah. - But that's sun damage, guys. - I know, but the sun damage creams for Koreans, I believe is because they wanna stay white. - Right. - Yeah, I wanna get tan. - Right. - It's not because of damage. - Yeah. - But you don't wanna get sun on your face anyway. - Yeah, she wants to stay white. - I live by Korean tan. - Yeah, start from there. - Which are two things that are great. One is I get to see people, everybody dresses like the invisible man, the Korean ladies when they walk around my neighborhood. - Yeah. - Nobody's gonna get one, literally gloves, visor, mask, this. - Yes, there's nothing. - Yes. - You can't see anything. - Sure, great bit. (laughing) And then Koreans are so thrifty. If you need to buy a piano, go to K-Town. - Why? - That's where I got my piano, 'cause Koreans are, Koreans are culturally thrifty. - Oh. - And they're not gonna get ripped off on a piano. - Oh, that one. - But on's piano, I don't work for them. Go there. (laughing) - Okay, good, good. - On's piano, good deal. - On's piano, yeah. - Yeah. - Korea Town in general is a lot of-- - Better deal. - It's lively. - It's a lively town. - So, but it's also, you're not gonna get ripped off. - Yeah, do you spa? - I don't. - Yeah. - I just feel weird about that. - Yeah, I'd spa with you. - Yeah, yeah. - But then it's my wiener just out and there's everybody talking about that. - Well, the whites, you know, the whites put the shorts on. - Yeah, I'm probably one of those. - Yeah, oh, really, you won't free-ball it. - Well, yeah, I don't know everybody yet. (laughing) - I understand that. - And this is weird. You try to get a little bit of a boner so you just don't feel like, yeah, let's just talk through it. - Yeah, let's talk through it. - Let's talk through it. - Let's talk through it, let's talk through it. - So the first time I go spa with you, am I like, am I trying to get a little bit of fun? - No. - Just so it looks fun, more fun when I'm hanging out with body. - We do eye talk, and then I'm eye contact. - Right, eye contact. - But then my next thought is, why am I doing that? - Yeah, we're just regular guys. - Yes, but I'm still probably gonna try to get a show where for you a little bit. (laughing) - I mean, you know what I'm saying to you is, this is what I do when I'm in the scene room. - You do a lot of work. - No, I talk. - Uh-huh? - Cross my legs. - Oh, you do a silence of the land. - I silence the land that you want. - You do a silence of the land. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - I truck me. (laughing) - Yeah, it's totally normal. - Yeah, yeah, I do that. And I have pleasant, I'll have my arms like this, I'll have pleasant conversations. About Israel, whatever you want to talk about. - You're having a pleasant conversation about Israel while your fingers shove. - Yeah. - And you're in 105 degrees room. - I straighted the hormones in. - I shut it down. - You're gonna love you. - I'm gonna love you. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - If you can sit on your own dick. - Yeah, yeah, I can sit in a hot tub. - Yeah. - So I don't, you know what I, I brought friends to eat and add words. I don't know if you know who I am. I'm D.B. Star meter. Let's go. (laughing) - I wonder if mine has gone up or down. - We've been to Palaisia, brought to this spot. - Why do you only bring red guys? - This is a trend. - Black eyes. - Yeah. - And because you only bring the brothers. - Yeah, I bring the brothers there and they get a little scared. - Do you have everybody at thrill? - No, I'm going. - It's cool to walk into a Korean spa. - With a black guy. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - You feel like, 'cause they're gonna free ball it always, right? - All right. - You're gonna be like, excuse me, one of the shorts. - Correct. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - I don't want that. It's a very good impression. - It's fucking good. - At the spa. (laughing) - Yeah, I'm this guy, right? - Oh! - Also, if you're tucking your dick into your, shouldn't you just put the shorts on at that point? If you're tucking it into your-- - I feel like you have gone around about way to just not have shorts on. - I thought it was like, but you're literally sitting on your neck. - I'm sorry. - I'm sorry. - That's a great question. Look, why are you tucking your neck? - Why are you tucking? - I'm sorry. Okay, it's not as if I get naked and tuck immediately and walk to the fucking steam room top. - That's what it sounds. - That's what it sounds like. - No, that's what I know. - What it sounds. - I know, but what I'm doing is I'm free-balling it, like a man almost opened armed. - Here's what I'm gonna do. - I'm gonna go the opposite way. I'm gonna put the shorts on. I'm gonna sit in a way that definitely everything just falls out. (laughing) - I'm totally okay to do a Chicago theater stuff. (laughing) Just like I definitely put shorts on. - Yeah. - But then. (laughing) - Yeah. - So, um, but then when I sit, so I don't make people feel uncomfortable, I do the tuck and then sit like them. I feel like there's a solid chance you make some of the old guys uncomfortable anyway. - Just with your vibes. - No, no, no, because Koreans, right? They, we're, it's just a part of our culture. - Right. - So Korean men and we just, we just free-balled. There's no, I mean, we don't rub one out to make it look bigger. We know the black guys have bigger ones, you know what I mean? We accept the social, you know what I mean? - Right. - Right, so it's like, you know, and the white-- - And they're trying to maintain a three or four. - That would be weird and I, yeah, don't come. - No, yeah, I don't-- - Obviously I'm not gonna come. (laughing) I'm just gonna maintain a photo, a photo-graphable. - Oh, I didn't mean coming that way. I don't wanna be, don't come with me. - No, no, I'm talking about, yeah. - I'm just talking about keeping that camera red. - Right, right. - Which there's like, there's some effort to that. Ladies don't know about this, but, you know. - Yeah, I did have a, I, I, I pitched the show to end. - You know, you have good hair days. - Yeah, yeah. - I pitched a show about a Korean small. - Yeah. - Yeah, and, um, and it, they, you know, they bought it, but we did see dogs on it. - Well, it was a single camera show, and there was that conversation with the guys. - Is it a, is it a Korean spot called Seedongs? It was a, it was, it was a tentative name, but-- - And it's not Seedongs. - No, no, no, no, no, it didn't go to, it didn't go to the pilot level. Have you, have you repitched, and then it didn't go to the pilot level? - Literally, most of my life. - Yeah, it hurt. - I would say the best of our career, there's the other thing about, when do you stop? - Mm-hmm. Like, at the, if you do, like, comedy, screenplays, TV writing, stuff like that, if you go one for eight, or one for 10, you're the best in the world. - Yeah, yeah. - And that's if you're going one for 10. - One for 10. - Yeah. - You are among the best at this. - In your career so far, how much of it feels like you're up here, like, percentage wise, and how much of it feels like you're in the trend? - It always feels like I'm in the trenches, I would say. I mean, there's been times where I'm like, oh, that was fun, or I got, I made some money from that, or something like that. - Do you think when it stops that you could feel, you could be up here a little longer? - Well, this is a scary thing, and why we sometimes ask chat GPT to like, tell me what you think of my career? (laughing) - But you're, I mean, this is very true, yeah. - The roller coaster of a ball is the hit. That's the addiction. It's just like being in a bad relationship, of our toxic relationship, of like, you know, the make-up sex when, you know, right after the big break-up or whatever. - Guys, guys, guys, guys, guys, guys, guys. The whole point of it is that that's not the point of living life. - Exactly, that's the thing. - Right, so basically, what I'm trying to do, let me just say what I'm gonna say, okay. But, you know, I'm almost at that point, where I'm like, okay, I'm good. And once I get that, you're not gonna be though. - Yeah, yeah, I will be. And I'll tell you, we're gonna make 'em sign something. - Because I'm gonna move to Hawaii. - No. - None of this is happening. - Yeah, yeah, it's gonna happen. At 60, I'm gonna move to Hawaii, and when I'm gonna, let me finish. - I'm, no, I'm talking, and I keep saying, no, it's how the bit works. - Yes. (laughing) - You're yes, Annie, in a reverse way. - Correct. - Yeah, okay, good. So, what I'm gonna do is, I am gonna go to Hawaii. - No. (laughing) - I mean, you might. - Yeah, I will. - And then, you're gonna do some dates, and then, you're gonna do a worldwide tour. - No, no, no. - And then, you're gonna meet some other hot girl. (laughing) - No. - So, I'm gonna go to Hawaii, and I am going to-- - Do you believe this? - Mm-hmm. - So? - And you're gonna like, and you're gonna like-- - Believe me so far. - You're gonna grow vegetables and stuff. - Oh, not just, not gonna be live off the-- - Right now, there's a lot of cats that need help, right? There's no real cat sanctuaries on the island. - There isn't, you know, that's true. I go feed them a lot. - I know, and so I might wanna create a cat sanctuary 'cause I love cats, right? And we turn it into a TV show. (all laughing) - That will back where we started. - That's how it gets back in. - Get you right back in. It's called Bobby Lee's Lahaina cat sanctuary. (all laughing) - Yeah, yeah. - I have a pitch for you. - I'm not with my dream. - Okay, sorry. - Let me finish my fucking dream. - But I have a Hawaii pitch for you. - All right, I already did it. - No, no, no, outside of the cats. - Okay. All right, so let me just finish my dream, Tom. Okay, I'll be 60. I'll have some cats, you know what I mean? And I will start a new podcast by myself. - Mm-hmm. - Whoa. - This is the Alex Jones vibe. - Yeah, I'm gonna go-- - You're just gonna Alex Jones it. - Yeah. - Just screaming at people. - No, I'm not gonna scream. I wanna say, because in this podcast-- - And get more and more sunburned. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. I see edit, edit, edit, edit, edit, edit, edit, right? I wanna do a podcast where I stop on all of those edits. - You're just, it's just you and your thoughts. - And my thoughts, and I don't care if I get ad-- - I don't care if people get comfort, comfort, controversial, or whatnot. I wanna be, it'll be free. - But you, Bobby, you are free. Well, the problem is that you are free now, and you worry so much. - Yeah, because I-- - I know, you're already worrying about that I just said that. See, you were just, you're so-- - I know. - Yeah, like you step off stage at the Chicago Theater and you're like, is everybody okay? And you're like, fuck everybody, you're Bobby Lee? - I understand that. - Stop apologizing. - I understand, but when I'm 60, I wanna be really free. - That's only three years from now. - When does this come out? - Yeah, yeah, just-- (laughing) - Three. - Yeah, yeah. It's gonna be five years from now. - Right, after Gal Dautry and the celebrity sex pass on July. - You're like, yeah, once. - Yeah, do you like, go watch the movie? - Yeah. - So you got you Hawaii, your cats, and a podcast, right? - It says it's you. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - And then what is your stopping point and what is the dream? What is your cats and Hawaii equivalent? - It's weird because I already sort of do that, but I also, I think I know that inherently, I probably won't ever stop until somebody makes me stop. - Yeah, that's a trap. - It's a problem. No, it's a terrible trap because it's like, but we've all gone to this place where you just don't feel, I don't know if it's just the consumerism of everything or life is just like, but everybody's always like, it's also weird being an actor and a writer and things 'cause people are endlessly like, I haven't seen you in anything lately. And I'm like, oh my God, I have like five movies coming out, but you might not see those either. And you obviously didn't see the last part I was in, so it's like, it feels like there's this endless pressure of like-- - That's the problem with the business. - Yes. - It's being visible all the time. - Yeah, yeah, because now it's like, we're competing against so many other things. - Correct. And that's why I've done how many, I'm in the Green Day movie coming out. Hopefully people will watch it, you know? I'm in-- - That's a fun idea. - What? - It's the-- - Nimrods. - Yeah. - Is it the biopic of-- - No, no. - No, no, no, no. - Yeah, but they're in it, they row in. - Playing, really? - No, yeah, I'm playing, no. - I would like to see that. Yeah, so I'm in that movie, you know, my Hulu special comes out in November, so I am still doing things, right? But you know, I do a lot of these kind of movies, and it's like, you know, I did a movie called "Crotty Ghost." - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - I know. - Okay, yeah, yeah. - "Rotty Ghost" is a genius movie cover. Was it not good? - Not good? - 'Cause it actually sounds great. - It was just, here's what the pitch was. I didn't really listen to the pitch, I got-- - I understand. - I go, who's in it? - Yeah. - And they go, 'cause I had done a movie with Jim Belushi. - Toronto, Jim. - Right, so I love Jim, and Jim wants you to be in it. - Yeah. - So I go, okay, I'll do it. - And "Crotty Ghost" is the title came out in English? - Yeah. - "Crotty Ghost"? - Yeah, yeah, it's called "Crotty Ghost." - And what's its star meter? - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - I'm not even in the star, I can't even believe my name in the line up there. - Yeah, you are. - Yeah, like, let's go cast, go down. Nope, nope, there we go. - There we go, I'm fifth. - Oh, wait, that's pretty good. - Inside Blake. - Is it by level of a star meter? No, it's not. - You got a Keckner's in that? - Yeah. - I can do it by star meter. - Yeah, Keckner's good by star meter. - I have a question. - Yeah, of course. - Is the correct time to leave when you're on top or when you're on-- - It's a great question. - Oh, that's a great question. - It's the first is Lennox Lewis, right, boxer. - Jordan. - He quit right after his last title, right? - Yeah. - But, so when is, if we're going with 60, and what about 60 is-- - But what's top? - Okay, that's-- - That's another question. - 'Cause right now, right now, I would say, in theory, you're at the top. Like, this is the most you've ever made. - Oh, but that's a great question. Is the top the most you've ever made, or is the top the best you feel? - The most visible. - Okay, that never even comes up. - Okay, two things, the most visible you've ever been and the most money you've ever made. That would have been a while ago for me. (laughing) - Tom, Tom, Tom, Tom, Tom, you're rising. You're rising. - Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I am rising. - You're rising, you're rising, you're rising. - How sad that, like, the fact that I'm rising on IMDB does get in my head a little bit and does feel good. It's like that, like, what, how could that fucking matter? - Yeah. - But there was a ranking and I can't believe I'm 4,000, whatever, whatever. - But again, a lot of the people ahead of you are dead. - Take the win. - Okay, take the win. - Half of those folks are dead. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, fucking Jean Hackman. Dead. - Oh, Yehanta. - Yeah, Hanta, classic. No, his wife got it. - He's secondary. - How did he get Hanta? - She got it from the road. The cut scene. - Nice. - Yeah, it was the rat. - It was probably if I kept hows. - Yeah, yeah. - But he's a multi-millionaire. - See, this is the thing, like, you know, like, this is like-- - There's no help. - When do you stop? 'Cause you could be Jean Hackman. Legend. - Legend. - Made a fortune. - He is beloved. - Yeah. - Awards, everything. And still the mice get you. (laughing) - You know what? - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - You did literally everything that everybody could do. - Right. - For one of the coolest people that ever lived. - Yeah. - And the mice. - Yeah. - No, it's like nothing is worth it. - The lens with mice. - Yeah, nothing. - We're all gonna die. - Is nothing worth it? - Yeah. - I don't need to try. - We just try to go theater. - Should we try it, you do? We're gonna make some-- (laughing) - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Or just do whatever 'cause the answer is always mice. - Yes. - You're right. - The mice are coming. - You know what, here, let me, can I just, I'm gonna re-explain my future now, right? Given the new information. I just got new information. It's a podcast with no one. No, no, no. It has all the cats, you might not have mice. - Yeah, yeah, but-- - The mice won't get you in the cat. - Yeah, because I'm gonna have a lot of cats. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. So cats have a lot of diseases that we'll talk about. All right, here's what I'm, here's, I'm just gonna take a day by day, moment by moment. - Sure. - Right? Because things shift, right? We have no idea. I've had down time. - I feel like people in the comments are gonna say that I was mean to your friend and I like him a lot now and we're just gonna-- - No, no, no. This kid, this is the second time on this podcast. He got a huge, he just got a huge guest. You're a huge star and he's getting screened on. - Anything you come to me. - Yeah, he works the door at the comedy store. - You're a doorman at the top. - Not anymore. - Yeah. (laughing) - Not anymore. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - You're a big cat. - I said you were racist and I got you fired. (laughing) - You're helping me to help you move up. - What? - You know what, you were fucking clinging to that job. You were clinging to the doorman job. Like a baby. (laughing) Now you got to swim out to the deep end. (laughing) - Thank you. - 'Cause also you have a terrible reputation now. Lucas Qto, he's not a cute kid. - He's a cute kid. - Yeah, he's a cute kid and we like-- (laughing) - Yeah, we wouldn't arrest him about. If I didn't-- - I'm racist and I got fired for my job. - No, I'm gonna say that in a minute on social. - Yeah, social. (laughing) - Yeah. - What were you talking about? - Sometimes we're just laughing about him. - You're new dream, you're new dream. - My new dream is just-- - I feel like this will change in three minutes. - No, that's not gonna change. - I mean, I know you. - No, no, no, moment to moment. - Okay. - Right now it's good and I'm not gonna make any decisions until I make it, right. Because you never know what's gonna happen. - That's true. - Yeah. - When I-- - Are you wearing armor? - But you're not, I don't think you're great at like sitting and not doing anything. (laughing) - Are you? - No. - I'm trying to be mindful about not like scrolling a lot. I haven't played a video game in six months. - What? - It's six months. - Wow. - The ghost of Yotai was the last one. I stopped playing video games and then I wrote 14 films that got made. (laughing) So I don't wanna tell video gamers out there what to do with their lives. - Yeah, yeah. - But from the time I stopped, 14 got made. - I've never pitched a show and it got to a pilot. - So yeah, so I'm zero for 20. - Yeah, but that's about a number. That made you also do then. - Yeah. - Yeah, yeah. - It's also something to do. - I think this is a show. Bobby's Cat House is a whole thing. - We built this from-- - Oh, Bobby's Cat House. - A whole Cat House. - Oh, in Hawaii. - Yeah. - And really, nothing happens. It's just like a big brother just camera's falling. - Yeah, it's all about being cats. - Yeah. - And then the neighbors are like, he doesn't seem okay. (laughing) - Right. - Would you play the neighbor? - I'm the neighbor. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - He's going and all the cats come out. (laughing) - That was weird. - Yeah. - Hell is my way of comming in a relationship. - Yeah. - I'm in a comming in a relationship. - You always have in a relationship? I've always been comming in a relationship. - I've met so many hot girlfriends. I'm in a comming in a relationship. - Oh. - Why can't I have beautiful women? - You don't. - Why me? - Why you stop apologizing? - You're a fat Asian guy? - You're not a fat Asian guy. - You're a short Asian guy. (laughing) - It's totally different. - It's totally different. - It is different, yeah, yeah. - You're also a rich Asian guy. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. I would, you know, yeah, um. - Rich is relative. - Rich is relative. Well, one day we'll do it. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - I've done a coffee table book of all your ex-girlfriends 'cause, no, that'd be kind of cool for some of them. - Well, here's the thing. I have relationships with all my ex-girlfriends still today. If I ran into any of them, it would be fun. - And we all have relationships with each other. - That's good. - I'm friends with his ex. - Right, yeah, yeah, so. - It's a whole thing. - Yeah, it's a whole ecosystem. - Yeah, we did the pharmacy. (laughing) - Yeah, and I have appointments and stuff. - Yeah. (laughing) - What? And I have regular boyfriend dick. - What, you get one friend? - You get one friend? - The size. - Oh, husband dick. - I have husband dick. - Yeah, yeah. - Oh, husband dick. - Yeah, yeah. - Because he's his son. - Anyone that's, I've talked about this before. Everyone's, yeah. - Anyone that sees me, they think that it's gonna be really small, but it's not. - I thought you said you had a boyfriend. I was like, oh, whoa. - I don't think, Bobby, first of all, no one thinks you're gonna have a small dick because also we can sort of see the outline of your dick all the time. You know, almost all of your work. - Yeah, yeah. It's a good body of work. - No, you're a good body of work. - Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. - You get to see the shadow of your dog. - Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. - Kind of a lot. - Yeah. You know. - Yes. I know it better than some pals. (laughing) - Oh, all right. - Anyway, Tom. - Yeah. - How'd you have fun today? - I don't know. (laughing) - What do you mean? - I don't know, I'm just thinking. - I feel like this was worth it. - What's ever enough, you know? - I know. I feel like this was-- - I'm just getting, I always have fun. And I hope, I know that I'm second you. 'Cause we got to do bits. It's fun to have bits. - Yeah. I understand. - No, but you're a funny guy. - Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. - He's a sweet funny kid. - Thank you. - I don't-- - He's actually a rising gale dog. - Yeah, rising pretty fast. 900,000, 928,000. - You'll be gonna miss out. You're gonna be one more thing that's gonna jump really, really high. - Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. - You're really a castable kid. - Thank you. I'm open to being cast. - How old are you right now? - 25. - Say 19. (laughing) - Yeah. - We're gonna go one more time on that. - I can't believe you're 19. (laughing) - Working the door and the thing. - Yeah. Yeah. - And you grew up in a car. - Yeah. Yeah. - Just been saying cool stuff like that. - Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. - You know, you grew up in a car. - Yeah. Yeah. - You were-- - Don't say, um, palisades. - No, no, no, no, no. - Yeah. We're not from the park. - No, no, no. No, no, no. - No, no, no. No, no, no. - No, no, no, no. No, no, no, no. - No, no, no, no. No, no, no, no. - Bigger's field. (laughing) - I think a car. I think the answer is a car. Orfinage. Orfinage is good. - Yeah, okay. Yeah. - He has an education. - With the driveway of the Orfinage now. It's in the car park now. - Perfect. I like it a lot. - I like that a lot. - I like that a lot. - People love the story of somebody who used to live in a car. - We changed your name. - Didn't Jewel use to live in a car? - Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. - Yeah. Yeah. - Luka. - We love somebody. - Luka. - Oh, we like Luka's. - What's your boy? - Yeah. Luka in a car. (laughing) - He came from a car. - But you're less than me again. Bingo. Bingo. We like that. - It actually was really fun. - Yeah. That's a good show. - Luka Bingo. - Luka Bingo. - Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. - That's your new name, dude. - It's a little slightly. - A 19 Orfin. - Mm-hmm. Right. - Yeah. He's a 19 or hold an Orfin. (laughing) - Yeah. - From a famous car. - Yeah. - From an Italian car. - Amus car. - What do you think of the new Ferrari at EV? - I've never been a car guy. - Okay. - Which I think is on a night. - Give Thomas a ride of the applause. Thank you. - It's done. It's only pretty good.