This F*cking Guy: Jake Paul

Welcome to the latest edition of this fucking guy, the series where we spotlight one fucking guy making America worse and explain why they suck. I'm Erin Ryan, host of Crooked Media's hysteria podcast. Yes, and I'm Nina Parker, co-host of Crooked Media's Keep It. We love a synergy moment. You know we connect it. I'm so glad you're joining me to take on this fucking guy. Well, he's not ahead of state or religious scammer or a slutty cabinet secretary leading us into a forever war that's way over his mucus, smeared head, cough, hello, Pete Hegseth. Influencer turned high school dropout, turned boxer Jake Paul, is the physical embodiment of everything obnoxious about the internet. Oh, times two. He is the final boss of kids that give middle school teachers PTSD, you know, the type to read with their fingers. And the most pathetic part is that this mental child is almost. At the big age of 30, oh, Jake Joseph Paul was born on January 17th, 1997 to parents Pamela and Greg. Like many of America's worst whites, he was born in Ohio. Yes, Jake is the younger brother of Logan Paul. Now, we're only going to skim the surface on his brother's turbleness today, but just to break down their whole vibe for you, Jake and Logan Paul are the kind of people who give them self nicknames. Oh, by all accounts, the pair were a couple of exhausting morons from a young age, but we're always rewarded for their tedious behavior, unless it calcified into their personalities, their Christian church going parents divorced when the boys were young. Yes, marriage is sacred, unless it's hard, unless it's hard. But according to Jake's 2016 memoir, which is rated a 1.7 out of five stars on Spotify, their split was amicable, but it does sound like the elder Paul was kind of a dick. Yeah, and a 1.7 is still higher than expected, but please tell us more about elder Paul. Well, he seems kind of like the sort of guy who would play a bad dad in a Ryan Murphy show, you know, like a football obsessed, divorced house flipper. He's literally a house flipper who let his wild boys ride dirt bikes and thought that videos of Charlie's nincompoopery were evidence of his son's brilliance. Now, the way that Jake tells it, the boys were gifted a video camera when they were only 10 and 12 years old. And you really hear the words Jake Paul with gifted, but most 10-year-old boys aren't even tall enough to ride a rollercoaster at six flags at that time. But sure, give them tools to upload videos to millions of children and probably thousands of perverts. Sounds like a great idea, but the boys filmed themselves doing absurdly stupid things first just for their own amusement, and then for the amusement of others. In 2013, they started posting to Vine a short video social media platform that was, if those of you were not there when the black magic was written like me, a sort of shitty TikTok. But it was great for the kind of ball tasering jackass ripoff content that the Paul Brothers would become known for. Now, by the time Vine went by, Jake Paul had 5.3 million followers and billions of views. And I blame the boys and the bots. That is a pretty good theory. Their shared YouTube channel Zeus launched in 2007, but in 2014, Jake started his own channel on YouTube. Others increased their output, including ass and eye and violent pranks. We use quotations for pranks, including a concerning amount of tasering. This is all very stupid, very silly, very stupid, very stupid, Nina, I cannot emphasize how concerningly dumb, concerningly dumb, these boys sound in every single interview that they've ever done. Even before both of them started getting hit in the head professionally, this is especially evident in Jake Paul's aforementioned 2016 memoir, "You gotta want it." Oh, God. Which is narrated by the author and available to listen to. On Spotify, I listened to the whole thing. I think this might qualify you for Hazard Pay. I don't know what you do with this information and also a memoir. Who woulda thunk it. Yeah, I know. I am a glutton for punishment, so I read the whole book or I listened to the whole book. Being inside Jake Paul's head feels a little like watching two lone brain cells in a boxing match. And if I can be extra mean for a second, Jake's worship of his brother has led me to believe that the Paul Brothers had a sort of dysfunctionally enmeshed relationship that encouraged the worst from each other. Oh, I need you to elaborate. Oh, you're going to regret asking me to do that. Brothers who work together on rough housing related pursuits, I'm against it, creeps me out. Like they've definitely jerked off in the same room at the same time with the knowledge that the other one was also jerking off. And now I need Hazard Pay. In 2016, Paul was cast in Disney Channel's Bizarre Vark and I Carly Ripoff that starred a baby Olivia Rodrigo. Paul played a destructive doofus who did stunts when dared to. Even when basically playing himself, Jake Paul is not a good actor. Shocking. Hey, oh, I'm Jake Paul from Bizarre Vark and you're watching Disney Channel. Oh, no, look her. I can't believe Disney. I can't believe it. Like we got to get this guy on. You know who we should have. Let's get that one. And give him a wand. 2016 was also the year that Jake Paul attempted to convert his brand into something resembling what can best be described as a whorehouse for clout, a clout whorehouse, if you will, when he founded Team 10. Team 10 was a collective that aimed to bring young creators to Los Angeles, gather them under the same roof and create content together. And when we say young creators, we mean the not yet legal variety. People who lived in the Team 10 house ranged between 14 and 19 years old. And the only thing they kept in there was to create content that monetized every aspect of their lives. Yeah. Team 10 is giving the real world if it met big brother, if it aired on 2B. It's pretty much exactly like entertainment 720 from Parks and Rec, but without the charm of John Rolfio and more exploitative. Team 10 members were made to pledge to give Jake Paul a cut of their earnings for a specified period of time, even if they moved out of the house. This may have looked like an okay tradeoff to a young content creator who could have used the springboard of Jake Paul's popularity to get a name for themselves, but nobody got rich off Team 10 except for Jake Paul. Founding members of the collective included Alyssa Violet, who was romantically involved with Paul at the time, and would later accuse him of such very, very bad boyfriend behavior as telling her he loved her one day and the next day, flying in some girl from across the country to have sex with her within a year shot of his poor girlfriend. Again, I say shocker. She left the group in February 2017, Jake says she was kicked out. I think Fidelity would have been a major plot point at this time. I think we don't expect that of him. No, no, no. We're even a little bit far as in hell. Over the collective's life, more than 30 creators cycled through. Among them, Erica Costell, Tessa Brooks, Chance Sutton, the Spanish twins Emilio and Ivan Martinez, Anthony Trujillo, and Justin Roberts. I mean, this sounds like a digital sweatshop staffed at least partially by children. Yes, it was de Kenzie and it was, "Please, Zach, can I have some more followers?" In January 2017, during the waning days of the Obama administration, Jake Paul and 30 other influencers were invited to the White House for a creator's summit. Because Jake Paul harvests every experience he has as content, he decided to outdo the other creators by surreptitiously staying in the White House overnight. Nothing says invite, like, break in the law. You see what happens when you entertain Buckery Baroque? Stop it. Thanks, Obama. As Jake tells it, he hid in the bathroom in the White House until about four or five a.m. He filmed himself leaving and he could have gotten away with it too if he hadn't posted the video to his YouTube channel later that day. And of course, that got him a friendly visit from the Secret Service. I don't know if those visits are ever all that further. In early 2017, a couple of weeks after the White House prank, Paul announced he'd raised $1 million for his influencer marketing agency push. Then on May 30 of 2017, Team 10 released the single "It's Everyday, Bro." So creative and the title refers to the fact that Team 10 used to post one video per day. And it was also a diss track towards his ex Alyssa Violet. Whoa. Oh. Oh. I'm in. Oh my god. This is horrible. Oh my gosh. All these people, I guess what? No rhythm detected. No. Not a two-step, onbeat. Oh my god. Oh my god. No rhythm detected. No. Not a two-step onbeat. No rhythm, onbeat. In the house. I believe the phrase people use is "unseason." This is "unseason." Oh yes. This is "unseason." I'm one of those people. This is the most "unseason." Oh. The pants is down. Oh baby, no. It's everyday, bro. It became one of the most disliked videos on YouTube. And it's seen by many as one of the worst songs ever recorded, a distinction that Jake Paul monetized as proof of relevance via having haters. It made the collective $2.7 million, most of which Paul himself pocketed. Now, that summer, Team 10 toured the country, undoubtedly spreading bad music and chlamydia everywhere they went. You get a moxasillin. Meanwhile, Paul and Team 10 were terrorizing the poor regular people unlucky enough to live on the same block as their chucky cheese for at-house. Jake Paul publicized their address and crowds of their rabid and clearly unsupervised fans swarmed the residential Beverly Grove Street. By July 2017, neighbors were considering a class action suit declaring Jake Paul a public nuisance due to his never-ending stunts like when he set furniture on fire in his empty swimming pool. Now, that summer, local station KTLA ran out. a report about how obnoxious Paul and company were. Paul's appearance in the story didn't help the group beat the obnoxiousness allegations. No, Lord. But as neighbors living with this every day, we're fed up. Look at him. Shortly after we arrived, look who came out to greet us. If this was my neighborhood, I would have lost it. Look at this. He's running into a loser. God, I wouldn't do that. God, he called. No, I know. Honestly, you know what, these folks are to blame for thinking it's cute. I wouldn't do that. He created a living hell out here. It's like a circus. Yeah, it's all the fans. I mean, but people like going to the circuses, right? What do you say to the neighbors so that they're upset? They're really upset. No, I, I, I, I, he knows more works. No, I'm honestly, yeah, it's terrible. It's a bad situation. No, I feel bad for them. There's no way to do that. The Jake Paulers are the strongest army out there. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. No, no, no, not doing the dab and saying dab. Yeah. His story is brought to you by Honey Love. A few years ago, I realized that I was absolutely fed up with restrictive sports bras that would dig into my ribcage and give me the dreaded underboob effect. I would rely on them for work. Outs, but I couldn't wait to take them off as soon as possible. Then I found Honey Love Cross Flex activity bra. This is the only sports bra I found that supportive enough for a workout without all the tightness and digging in. It has an easy hook and I back. So there's no wrestling with it on your head like most sports bras. Plus it gives real shape and separation. So I can wear it all day and not have to worry about the uniform look. The Honey Love Cross Flex activity bra is so comfortable and supportive that I'll wear it out on a run and then straight to the grocery store or pick up my daughter from pre-game. Honestly, it's so comfortable that sometimes I'll forget it's on and I'll sleep in it. That's why I'm hooked on Honey Love. Honey Love is now offering a crossover triple bra bundle. So if you want a full refresh on your top drawer, you can get huge savings by buying three at once. Honey Love is an independent female founded brand with products designed by women who actually wear them, including the founder Betsy. Honey Love doesn't just make bras and shape wear. They've built a full line of tanks, body suits and underwear with supportive structure, smoothing fabrics and premium finishes. Honey Love recently launched their new crossover contour bra, which features their best selling wireless crossover bra design. Plus built in molded light foam pads for extra support and a beautifully contoured shape. Treat yourself to the most advanced bras and shape wear on the market. Use our exclusive link to save 20% off Honey Love at HoneyLove.com/Histeria. That's HoneyLove.com/Histeria. After you check out, they'll ask where you heard about them. Please support our show and tell them we sent you. Experience the new standard and comfort and support with Honey Love. Histeria is brought to you by Wilde Alaskan Company. Wilde Alaskan Company offers the best way to get wild caught, high quality seafood delivered to your door on your schedule. I love a good piece of fish, especially at the end of a hot day. I don't know what it is. I love like a good piece of fish at the end of a hot day. I love Wilde Alaskan because it is the absolute freshest frozen seafood that you can possibly get. It is super high quality. It comes right to your door. Each box comes with individually portioned fillets. They're vacuum sealed. They're easy to prep and great for any meal no matter how quick or elevated. All fish is quick frozen fresh from the Alaskan waters, which helps lock in its freshness, texture, flavor, and key nutrients like omega-3s. You can also trust this fish. There's no GMOs, antibiotics, or other additives. Every order supports sustainable harvesting practices. An Alaskan fisherman whose history is tied to the region and practice. I learned recently how to make really good fish tacos, and I have used the fish from Wilde Alaskan to make the breaded like Baja-style fish tacos. I've used the rockfish to do it. I've used the Pacific cod to do it, and I love a piece of halibut. It's all so good. It's all so good. Wilde Alaskan Company is so confident that their fish is the best that they offer you 100% satisfaction and money back guarantee, so you can try your first box risk free. Go to wildalaskan.com/guy for $35 off your first order of premium wild caught seafood. That's wildalaskan.com/guy for $35 off your first order. Thanks to Wilde Alaskan Company for sponsoring this episode. The Big Mouse House is not like that. Oh, Disney. Disney does not like being embarrassed by one of its stars, especially one that can't act its way out of a wet paper bag. Within days of the KTLA report, Disney's sh*t can't Jake Paul. Finally, a good decision. Now Jake tried to finesse this into a mutual decision saying that he had outgrown the channel, but that was a hot-butted lie, and he was ridden off the show in the middle of production of Bizarred Vark's second season. When team 10 was finally done turning Beverly Grove into a war zone, the company that owned the house they rented, sued Paul and company for at least $2.5 million, itemizing a trampoline on a roof, backyard fires, a pool full of breakfast cereal, and interior walls punctured by multiple holes. You know, I don't expect any less, and it was almost all of their everyday bro money. I know. Well, it's everyday bro. As the old saying goes, time keeps on slipping, slipping into the future. And team 10 was never built to last. In November 2017, the Martinez twins left, saying they'd been mocked for their limited English and went to bed each night fearful of the next prank. They alleged Paul used racist terms toward them, pressured them into physical altercations with each other, and withheld brand deal earnings. Cole Carrigan said that he was subjected to home-of-phobic bullying. Meanwhile, Jake was running through the women in team 10 like a golf cart being driven by a drunken chimpanzee, at least that's what he was playing at on his channel. Is there even a line between real and fake with this guy? Now, Jake had a fake wedding with YouTuber Erica Costell, and another fake wedding with influencer Tana Manjo. Which fans could watch on streaming for the low low price of $50. Before the newlyweds reportedly left the ceremony separately. Oh, how romantic. Yeah, his song about his fake wedding with Erica was called Jerrica, and it made it to number 86 on the Billboard Hot 100. Oh my goodness. I can't believe it made the list. By 2019, almost all of team 10's members had fled. Their accounts had gone quiet. Paul tried to reboot in June 2020 with new roommates in Calabassus, home of the Kardashians. Oh, wow. No, there are not the worst people in Calabassus. This was also smack in the middle of the COVID-19 pandemic and all the attendant restrictions. And of course, Jake Paul responded to them by throwing at least one giant maskless party on the property on July 11 in defiance of public health recommendations, eventually calling COVID a hoax. Of course he did. In August 2020, the FBI raided the Calabassus property, but it didn't end up in him spending even a moment in jail. It did lead to him being down if you loose guns, though. Oh, just what we need him with ammunition on to the next script. Now let's get into the backstory of how Jake Paul got into boxing because while he was terrorizing eardrums with his music and neighbors with his monetized chaos, he was also ramping up to be a professional fighter. During the summer of 2018, the Paul Brothers engaged in a tiresome exchange of trash talk with a pair of creators from the UK who were also brothers known as KSI and Comedy Shorts Gamer. Ultimately, Logan fought KSI, the older one. Jake fought Comedy Shorts Gamer, real name Deji Olutunji, in a double-built boxing match in the UK. Here's Jake and Comedy Shorts Gamer at their weigh-in in Los Angeles. Deji, this ain't okay, dog. We're knocked out on the canvas and your family's watching you. Are you going to hear this one? Two, one, two, one, two, one, eight, five, six, seven, okay. You see his stuff? How do you feel about what's going on? Oh my god, you made a mind. Why say the mind right now is just to kill you, okay? I want to end you. So this is real beef, y'all, boys and girls, this is real beef. It's like three brain cells up their tops. Somebody got two. Yeah, somebody's got two. Somebody was left out. Somebody's got tumbleweeds going through their head. Somebody's sharing one. Now, if you ever wondered what happened to the children left behind, the Paul Brothers are here. They just want to show improve. So it was a white color match which meant it didn't count as a victory or loss on anybody's official record as a boxer. It just means it was too lads fighting each other wearing helmets. Still, Jake Paul's fifth round technical knockout boosted his confidence enough to release a rap single about the fight titled champion. It's awful. What is he trying? Is he trying to be tough? Oh my god, he's trying to do the mumble rapping. He's doing Tyler. Yeah, he's doing uh, this is horrible. He's not, you're not Tyler, the creator, sir. This is no, oh my god. Oh no, stop dancing. Stop dancing, stop dancing. Yeah, no. Oh my god. Oh, another jumping. I'm so embarrassed for that. It's so dumb. A year later, Logan Paul and KSI would have a rematch which KSI won. Backstage, Jake cried about it like a little bitch. I have to let go every, okay, day, we would go home and feel like, what is the medication? He needs something, he needs some form of emotional regulation. He's acting like he just got news from a doctor that his brother's not going to make it. You know, Jake challenged KSI to a boxing match to avenge his brother, I guess, and after literally years of them quibbling back and forth. forth about Jake dropping wait for the fight. And now looks like the KSI Jake Paul bout of our dreams may never happen. Now Nina, Jake Paul's 2016 book and the backstage boxing match tears make two things clear. One, he's fucking idiot. Two, he idolizes his brother. Who is also a giant piece of shit? Yes, two peas in a pod. Now most normal Americans who were not unsupervised tweens first became aware of the Paul Brothers on or shortly after New Year's Eve 2017, when Logan Paul's infamous suicide for his video was first posted. Logan, three friends in his security guard had been careening around Japan, making videos of themselves bothering people for a few weeks, starting in December 2017. Jake wasn't there, but Logan was obnoxious enough for both of them. Here's a super cut of some of the moments they captured and released on his channel, via We The Unicorns. I just got to be careful to not like this respect the culture. Japan is all about the respect. Whoa. Oh my god. Don't Americans have arrived? Look at this. I don't worry about me, I'm just a vlogger. Gotta be careful to not like this respect the culture. Tokyo is a real life cartoon. It's going to be my god. What do you do? No. They should have kept him. They should have kept him up. Honestly, if Japan had bombed Ohio in response dropped a nuke on Ohio, I would be like, I get it. My soul's disturbed. Right? Disturbed. Are you getting dumber? I feel like it. I'm getting a little dumber. And lightheaded. Yeah. So this is where things start to get even darker. Yeah. It was their New Year's Eve adventure in the Ayokigahara forest that propelled Logan Paul from tedious moron to cartoonishly soulless clout demon in the eyes of the public. The wooded area located near the base of Mount Fuji is known colloquially as the suicide forest. And when Logan and his friends were there, they came across the body of a man who had died by suicide still hanging from one of the trees. Logan Paul and his buddies treated the whole thing like hashtag content and released a video. They blurred the man's face, but it was still extremely gross. Extremely gross. And the fact that Logan was wearing that dumb ass hat did not help. No, it did not. Originally, Logan made excuses for himself, claiming that he posted the video to promote suicide awareness. Yeah, I hate what stupid people try to lie to us. I know. By January 2nd, Blowback had gotten so severe that Logan Paul released this apology video. I've made a severe and continuous lapse in my judgment. And I don't expect to be forgiving. I'm simply here to apologize. This little size will put the hat back on. It was obviously unplanned. And the reactions you saw on tape were raw. They were unfiltered. No kidding. None of us knew how to react or how to feel. I should have never posted the video. I should have put the cameras down and stopped recording while we were going through. There's a lot of things that shouldn't have done differently. I'd like that he's keeping the video long enough to be monetized. Right. Even his apology video is long enough to be monetized. Because you know, it's normal to see a body and just start and think content. I don't know if I've seen the video. I don't know if I just do anyone who has been affected or touched by mental illness or depression or something. Does he know he's in there? He's talking about himself. You've been affected. Yeah, and his family. And I'm sure the victim's family was like, thank you so much. Thank you so much. Now, a second thought, I think maybe it's better that he was wearing that dumb ass hat in the suicide forest because it's less unserious than that dumb ass haircut. Oh, that haircut had a chokehold. Had a chokehold. For a long time. On the worst voice. As a hopeful coder to the suicide forest obscenity, Logan Paul took a three week break from YouTube before returning with a seven minute long suicide awareness video. He pledged to donate $1 million to suicide prevention organizations. But later, the mighty reported that he'd only donated 318,000, which is less than a million, of course, if you're Paul-level intelligent. And while he deleted the other vlogs from Japan, where he was doing things like throwing objects at police officers, jumping on moving delivery vehicles, as well as running through a Japanese market dressed in a kimono and cone-shaped hat, he never apologized for those. Of course, he didn't. He steps charities. How very trumpy of him. Now that Logan was back on YouTube, he was immediately back on his bullshit in early February 2018. The elder Paul posted a video of himself, tasering dead rats and joking about eating a tied pod. That's what finally got YouTube to suspend ads across Logan's videos. A change.org petition always can depend on a change.org petition. Demanding YouTube delete his channel altogether gathered 720,000 signatures. I wish I would have signed. I didn't, unfortunately. And let's not keep bringing up age into this. But I will for a second, because Logan Paul was legally an adult at the time. And he's in his 20s. He's not a 14-year-old goofing off for attention. This man can drive a car. He has a credit card, unfortunately. Oh my God. This is who Jake Paul looks up to the most. This man, child. Like I said, Jake wasn't there when Logan pointed and laughed at the body of a man who had taken his own life in Japan. Jake was busy back home, though. He was about to get his own round of terrible publicity. When he was caught on camera, free-style wrapping with the N word. Oh my gosh, what a clown. He had to say that. You can't, Jake. Jake? People gave his man money. They had given money. Lots of money. Yeah, I don't play about this at all. He is a culture of vulture to the core. Around that time, Jake posted a video called, "I Lost My Friginity," the thumbnail for the video, which, again, was for a subscriber-based, consisting mainly of children, featured Jake posed semi-nude with fellow team-ten member, Erica Costell, on top of him. January 2018 was also when Jake Paul launched ed fluence. What was ed fluence, you might ask? I'm still not entirely sure. I don't think any of us are. Jake was an early adopter in the game of scamming children, really an innovator in the field. He was the Henry Ford of stealing lunch money. Ed fluence was a 74-video series that was marketed as an online course. It's a portmanteau of education and influencer. Jake marketed the course to his 13 million YouTube subscribers. Again, most of whom were kids. Here's what it promised to teach students tips and tricks on how to build an audience and become an influencer just like Jake Paul. Here's how it really worked. Visitors to the site would take a quiz that asked them in size of questions like, what kind of influence are they wanted to be? And what their dream car was. That's a good place to start. The results were emailed to them along with a prompt to pay $7 to join something called team 1000. But then after paying the money, you'd get to unlock access to one video. And at the end of that video, you'd be asked to pay an additional $57 to access the other content that you thought you'd already paid for. But once you paid for that, you'd be part of Jake's inner circle. This is a whole pyramid scheme. It's lullaro. Yeah, well, the course promised to refund people's money in its pitch. The actual terms of service said that all fees were non-refundable and less refund requests were made within three days of purchase. And a lot of people read all this as well. A scam. Yeah, so no regulatory action was taken against at Florence and team 1000. The site was shut down in 2020. Oh. But our boy wasn't done scamming. Yay. Jake Paul's next awful pursuit would be to get kids into gambling. Of course. In 2019, he started promoting mysterybrand.net, a Polish website where users pay a fee to digitally unbox a mystery prize. Jake Paul made a video showing himself paying 99, 99 repeatedly at first winning cheap prizes, but eventually unveiling Yeezy sneakers. Oh, wonderful. Let's open it and see what we get. OK, it's like $99. I'm going to open it. Can't open the box. OK. Here we go. Oh, my God. I can't believe people fell for this. It's children. It's for kids. I just want Sesame Street to come back. OK, I got Converse. Dang it. OK, I was hoping for something better than that. Let's keep on going. OK, Chuck Taylor's. Do not smurch Chuck Taylor's. I'm sorry. Chuck Taylor's are his staple. I got the Converse again, four times a charm. Oh, Yeezy. Let's go. Yo, that is dope. Scammer. Yeah. He skies the scammer. And there's Kanye. I feel like there should be a moment in each one of these where it's like, and there's Kanye. One of the prizes advertised to users of the site was a $188 million mansion that it turned out mystery brand didn't even own. Of course they didn't. Now, some people took to Reddit and Facebook to complain that they'd received fake merchandise if they actually received anything at all. It was also alleged that the game was rigged for creators who posted promotional videos of the site. So users were led to believe that they had a real shot at winning, let's say, like a Chanel bag. When in reality, they had no shot at all. Aw. Want, want. Paul's only public response was a statement that was like, hey, kids, don't gamble. I mean, I'm literally not really dramatizing it. That's kind of what it was. But it turns out that Jake Paul was violating UK law as he was 21 at the time and in the UK, you're not allowed to gamble until you're 25. Oh, but wait, we got a little bit more because in 2020, Jake launched a new scam. Oh, I mean, an online course. And this one was called the Financial Freedom Movement. Curiously, it was launched just about exactly when Paul's first online academy influenced went dark. The Financial Freedom Movement was a 1999 a month subscription service that promised to pair users with millionaire mentors. They was pitched as an alternative to traditional education. The second lesson behind the paywall was about driving a new bird. Not a rideshare academy. [MUSIC PLAYING] hysteria is brought to you by Jones Road Beauty. I'm on camera constantly. And I like to keep some makeup on hand. to keep myself looking fresh. I used to need a heavy makeup bag full of messy products in order to get my desired camera look, but now my routine uses a fraction of the products and time. That's because I have the Jones Road Miracle Bomb. It simplifies the steps without sacrificing the look. It is the ultimate no-fuss multitasker. I use mine as a highlighter, bronzer blush, lip tint, get a glowy look in under 60 seconds. It's so fast. And now I never have to worry about that kicked-on look. It's just my skin but better. I wear it before every hysteria recording. So you have certainly seen it in action. My favorite part is that it's actually good for my skin. Every Jones Road formula is packed with skin loving, clean ingredients and none of the junk. Once I started simplifying my routine with Miracle Bomb, I realized some days I want a little more coverage just without going back to a full complicated makeup routine. And Jones Road actually just launched their foundation stick that fits perfectly into that. It's a foundation stick that even foundation skeptics will love. This skincare forward foundation delivers buildable, real coverage with feeling completely weightless on your skin. You'll love how it gives you medium to full coverage without ever looking heavy. It's dermatologist tested, impact with skin loving ingredients to nourish while you wear it. And the finish is just really natural. It's not too matte, it's not too dewy, it's just smooth, even healthy looking skin. And it's available in 30 shades to match a wide range of skin tones. Because clean beauty should just be the standard. Modern day makeup that's clean, strategic, and multifunctional for effortless routines. For a limited time, our listeners are getting a free, full-size mascara on their first purchase when they use code HYS at checkout. Just head to jonesroadbeauty.com and use code HYS at checkout. After you purchase, they will ask you where you heard about them. (upbeat music) In 2021, like the dumbest boy you graduated high school with, Jake Paul got into crypto. On February 12th, Jake Paul tweeted promoting electronics or TRX, replying to Lilliati and tagging Justin Sun with hashtag and a rocket emoji. For the SEC's later filing, he received crypto assets worth $25,019 for the tweet and disclosed nothing. He had 3.8 million Twitter followers at the time. - Oh boy. Now in 2021, Jake sent a tweet promoting cryptocurrency called SafeMoon that just so happened to coincide with the tokens all time high. - Now YouTube sleuth coffee zilla dove deep into Paul's scammy entanglements. He had found that Paul promoted league of sacred devils NFTs which resulted in buyers losing everything. Paul funded another NFT project from the same crypto wallet which brought in another cool million and a half dollars. This line of inquiry got coffee zilla sued by Logan Paul and that case is still ongoing. - Good lord. Now Jake Paul also promoted tokens called Milf and yummy. And at one point, he urged yummy holders to push it and insisted that nobody was selling it. And then sold his own free tokens roughly a month later for around $300,000. - Oh my god. In February, 2022, a 60 page proposed class action against SafeMoon named Paul alongside others such genius celebrities as Nick Carter, SoulJaboy, Lil Yachty and Ben Phillips. I always forget that about Lil Yachty, the crypto scheming. The suit also named company had Justin Sun. It alleged a slow rug poll in which promoters talked up the token while insiders sold into inflated volume. - A very classic pump and dump scheme. Coffee zilla was able to find Paul's digital fingerprints on a rarable open-sea profile called PRBLM child with @jakepall in the bio. - What a genius. - Including a $190,000 SafeMoon payment and 54 trillion SafeMoon tokens. What is that like? What is money? Receive the day before Jake promoted the SafeMoon racket. Problem child is also one of the nicknames that Jake Paul has given himself. If the @jakepall in the bio wasn't clue enough that it belonged to Jake Paul. - Problem child spelled really cool, by the way. The method Paul used was to create a fresh wallet for each project then consolidate everything into one address, which is what made it traceable. So total cross-all projects was approximately $2.23 million. And none of it was disclosed as advertising. And Jake got caught because he's an idiot. - Bad at crime. Of course, Jake is also into sports betting. No scam too big, no scam too small. He co-founded a sports betting company called Better in 2022 that spelled B-E-T-R. It received its temporary gaming license in January 2023. By March though, the short arm of the SEC had caught up with Paul's remedial criminality. The SEC charged eight celebrities with illegally promoting two crypto ventures without disclosing that they were paid to do so. Paul settled without admitting or denying the findings. Six of the eight settled collectively for more than $400,000 in discouragement, interest in penalties, and agreed to refrain from touting any crypto assets for three years. - But don't worry kids, there's more Jake to be purchased with your stepdad's credit card. Now if you look at Jake Paul's greasy ass complexion and his shower drain pew beard and think, well, I want to look like that when you're in luck. He launched a personal care line that is now available at Walmart. It's called W as in win. Our rated E for E-UK. Speaking of the opposite of winning Jake Paul's boxing career has continued to pace since that first unofficial fight with the British Jake Paul back in 2018. Paul has fought in 14 matches, among those he faced exactly two men who were prime age professional boxers, and he lost to both. - Of course he did. - Everyone else was retired, undersized, decades older from another sport entirely, or a journeyman brought in to be knocked out and around. The two wins that give Jake Paul's resume its glamour against Mike Tyson and Mexican boxing legend Julio Chavez Jr. were 58 and 39 respectively. - Now in December 2025, Paul finally got into the ring with an actual boxer, Anthony Joshua, who was returning from 15 months off after a brutal knockout in 2024. And well, it went about as well as Jake Paul Haters could pray and hope for. - Paul came up moving, landed a few jabs, but then he reverted to survival mode, doing his best to cover his face, and repeatedly dropping to the canvas like a scared, greasy turtle. He docked, he grabbed it, Josh was legs, the crowd booed. Referee Christopher Young lost patience in the fourth round and told both boxers that the fans hadn't paid to see this. Al Jazeera called it a mediocre contest that descended into force. - Oh boy, and then in the fifth round, that's what I asked who've been really started. Now once the match got into the sixth round, well, let's just take a look at Jake Paul's jaw, we can let us speak for ourselves. - Mm-hmm. ♪ We've got to shoot and feed like yours in the early rounds by two ♪ ♪ We're right up, it's amazing, Paul, it's still standing ♪ ♪ Taking the right upper cut, he knows he's been hurt ♪ ♪ His hands are down, it's just. ♪ - Oh, he's hurt. He don't know what to do. ♪ And he's gonna be dancing on this big shot ♪ ♪ And going like, "No, that punch is gonna happen." ♪ And it all goes to love, there's a lot of love ♪ - Whoa! - Finalist! - Yes! ♪ And his chin's turned on the ladder ♪ ♪ For that right hand right there ♪ ♪ And Mug and Jake Paul's face, he knew it right away ♪ ♪ He said, "Woo!" ♪ - Oh, super slow mo. - Oh, man. - Again. - Also, Anthony Josh was smiling when he does it. - Oh, as I would be. - Oh, wait, he can't speak for itself because it's broken into places which required surgery in four to six weeks of recovery plus a liquid diet. - Oh, sweet silence! This might have been the most satisfying part of this whole day. - Back in June 2025, there was some speculation that his fights were fixed after he beat Julio Chavez, Jr. Paul didn't like this and tweeted out a threat that he told his team to take legal action against people who were saying mean things about his boxing career. Not sure if he's actually sued anybody over this or if he's just been carrying out. Suffice to say he's very sensitive about his boxing. - Or babysat about his punches. Now he wants people to treat his name and care and respect. All of a sudden, mm-hmm. - If the great Gatsby is the great American novel, Jake Paul is the great American douchebag and no douchebag CV is complete without playing footsie with Donald Trump. Though he'd claimed to be apolitical in the past right before Election Day in 2024, Jake Paul released a 20 minute video of himself praising Donald Trump. In the video, he mentioned abortion, trans rights, Ukraine and Gaza. In other words, there's no way he wrote the statement himself. Still, Fortune singled out Jake and Logan Paul as two forces who helped the young male vote, skew seven points in Trump's direction over 2020 vote totals. With original insight like this, what choice would you have but to vote how this guy tells you to? - We're not here to call names and get involved in emotional battles. Let's look at who was the better president during their terms statistically. The next major point that always comes up is abortion, Donald Trump abortion, Donald Trump isn't protecting women's rights. That's what the media has painted to you and it's absolutely not true. Donald Trump was the president before for four years. What rights? As a woman, we're taken away from you. The answer is none. - He's such a fucking dumbass. - And you know he's been bent through a few abortions himself with somebody. How you don't notice? - And at the time, Jake couldn't even vote because he moved to Puerto Rico to avoid paying taxes at the expense by the way of actual Puerto Rican. So he just couldn't be worse. Even while being escorted out of a party celebrating team USA's basketball gold medal for, of course, drinking too much. - Jake, do the guys come with me? - Jake, are you all over? - No. - God. - Oh my God. - Do you know how much you have to drink when you're that big and that messed up? Like, how does he have room in his stomach for that much alcohol? - You know the else in there or the brain? - Yeah. Buy a bite of that last remaining brain cell. All right, brain. can't even get in the car oh no kicked out of a gold medal celebration because they're like too much. - He shouldn't have been invited in. - No, don't invite them in. Didn't you see centers? (laughing) Yeah, Puerto Rico is dealing with an influx of terrible mainlanders thanks to a law called Act 60, which lets people who weren't previously island residents pay close to nothing in taxes while living there roughly half the year. The Paul Brothers made the move and bragged about it to their 20 million followers. This benefit is only available to people who weren't previously Puerto Rican residents. So locals subsidize a tax break. They're statutorily barred from claiming. - In other words, Jake Paul isn't just a gentrifier. He's actively screwing people over. In a San Juan jurisdiction, the median house listing hits around $905,000. In January 2024 against household income under 30,000 and a poverty rate around 40%. By 2023, the phenomenon was on the house floor with one member naming Logan Paul specifically as a part of the new generation of gentrifiers. But the benefit has been extended to at least 2055, to which I say, Yuck. As a thanks for his last minute bandwagon hop, Jake Paul was present at Trump's second inauguration on January 20th, 2025. - Great day. But oh, he's not done. In March 2026, Paul appeared alongside Trump at a rally in Kentucky. Trump hinted that Paul would run for a half his one day and gave him his complete and total endorsement. Paul also fits into Donald Trump's inner circle because not only is he an idiot, he also has a history of serious sexual abuse allegations, like the big guy himself. Paul's first public accuser was Justine Paradise, a TikTok personality. Justine said she met Paul through a mutual friend and visited the Calabasas team 10 home several times. On one occasion, they began kissing consensually before moving to his bedroom, where she says he tried to have sex with her and she told him no repeatedly. After which, she alleges he forced her to perform oral sex. Justine was 24 at the time. She said she'd waited two years to come forward because she'd signed a non-disclosure agreement. Journalist Taylor Lorenz reported on the story for The New York Times, which included interviews with three of Paradise's friends who corroborated parts of her account. Paul's lawyer told the paper that Paul categorically denied the allegation. Paul also said he intended to pursue a defamation claim, but there's no record of a suit being filed, though. - Yeah, of course there's not. Now, another accuser named Riley Lawley alleged that Paul groped her and called her jail bait. When she was 17 and was working for him. Now, she says Paul routinely commented on her appearance and that after a video shoot in 2017, he groped her. She says she told him to stop immediately and he left the room. Asked about allegations by ESPN's Max Callerman, Paul said the claims dated back years, called them entirely false and said his legal team was pursuing the accusers, but no record of a suit ever actually being filed exists. - I guess not in a Trump world being a creep as an asset, not a liability. - Yeah, gentrifier, cryptoscamer, magnitude leader, child gambling promoter, sham online university purveyor, mullignant public men as sexual scourge. Is there anything awful about 2026 American culture that Jake Paul doesn't have a sweaty fingerprints on? The fact that millions of kids in their formative years were exposed to this modern day Falknarian manchild, some kind of role model is going to take years to unwind. The children have been left behind as you mentioned. - Well, there you have it, Nina Jake Paul, the living embodiment of everything wrong with American men. Now, where do you think he lies on her matrix of fucking guys? - Yeah, I think it's giving sociopathic grifter in a shiny red hat. And I also just think this guy is a huge opportunist. Like someone else we know. I think he's in good company. What about you? - I think he's a sociopath and I think he's an opportunist. No, he's a reckless dumbass. - Yeah. - He's a reckless dumbass and an opportunist. - Yeah, are we giving him too much credit 'cause is this intentional? I think so. - I think he just has learned how to get attention. - Yeah. - And to get attention, he acts like someone whose IQ is too low to be executed by the state. - But ultimately, this guy is a scammer. - Yeah, that's true. - It's just a full scammer. - That's true. He's not good at the things that he pretends to be good at. - He's a proper person. - He's good at the things he's actually doing. - You know, I think the best thing he did was get his job broken. And on that, it wraps up time that we have for this episode of this fucking guy. Now, if you like what you've seen, hit the like button, share with your friends and leave us a comment if you've got an idea for a future fucking guy subject. And if you're not already subscribed, there's no better time than now. - And while you're at it, subscribe to keep it. This episode was written by me with a writing assist from Meena Parker, all the rest of the credits, as well as links to our sources like Coffee Zilla's videos on YouTube and the SEC's filing against a bunch of crypto scamming celebrities can be found in our show notes. Take care, be well. Re-watch the video of Jake Paul getting his job broken by a beautiful man over and over and over again. And fuck that guy. Fuck that guy. (upbeat music) - Histeria is a crooked media production. Our show is produced by Caroline Reston, Claire Fogarty, Kendra James, Adrian Hill, Alyssa, Master Monaco, and me, Erin Ryan. Our team includes Matt DeGroat, Rachel Gayeski, Dylan Villanueva, Flavia Shang, Nia Kelman, Jay Banks, Charlotte Landis, and Jordan Cantor. Our staff is probably unionized with the writer's guild of America East. 'Cause girls just wanna have fun, so Annie, get your gun. ♪ Give 'em a big one, it will never be enough ♪ ♪ You can take what you want from me ♪