The World Cup, Trad Wives, and the Wedding of the Century

[MUSIC] >> From NPR and WP Easy Chicago, this is, wait, wait, don't tell me. The NPR news quiz. I'm the guy so new here, I'm still looking for the bathroom coat. >> [LAUGH] >> I'm Alzo Slade and here's your host at the student breaker theater at the Fine Arts Building of Chicago, Illinois, Peter Segal. >> Thank you, Alzo. >> [APPLAUSE] >> Thank you, everybody. We've got a great show for you today, later on, we're going to be talking to Carro Claire Burke, author of "Yesteryear," the book of the summer. That's the one about the tradwife influencer, who's mysteriously transported back into the real-olden days of 1855, where, okay, spoiler alert, everything kind of sucks. >> [LAUGH] >> But you can take advantage of our modern era by picking up your phone and giving us a call. The number is one, triple eight, wait, wait, that's one, eight, eight, nine, two, four, eight, nine, two, four. Now let's welcome our first listener contestant. Higher on, wait, wait, don't tell me. >> Hi, this is Alicia Booker, I'm calling from Cincinnati, Ohio. >> I love Cincinnati, the Queen's City, we've been there only once, I hope to go back, what do you do there? >> I am a high school social-study teacher. >> Oh my goodness. >> [APPLAUSE] >> That is a noble profession. How are the kids doing these days? >> They're doing pretty good at me right now, they're on summer breaks, so they're fantastic. >> [LAUGH] >> Well Alicia, welcome to our show, let me introduce you to our panel this week. First up, it's the writer of the seriously pop culture newsletter for the Washington Post, it's Shayna O'Neal. >> Hello Alyssa, how are you? >> [APPLAUSE] >> Next she's a comedian and an Emmy nominated TV writer, it's Karen Chi. >> Hi, nice to meet you. >> [APPLAUSE] >> And finally, on actor and writer you can see in the two-man improv show, Two Square at UCB New York in July 1st, it's Peter Gross. >> [APPLAUSE] >> So, Alicia, welcome to the show, you're going to play Who's Alzo this time? Alzo Slade is going to perform for you with three quotations of this week's news. If you can correctly identify or explain just two of them, you'll win our prize. Any voice from our show, you might choose for your voicemail. You ready to go? >> You bet. >> Okay, your first quote is a visitor from Australia, one of many people currently marveling at America's splendors. >> I get free refills as many times as I want. >> Bring it on. >> That person, like many, had come to the United States for what big sporting event. >> That would be the World Cup. >> Yes, the World Cup. >> [APPLAUSE] >> Social media is filled with visiting soccer fans fascinated by America. They're posting about our wide grocery store aisles, gas stations, larger than their parliament buildings. >> [LAUGH] >> It's really, I have to admit, it's kind of refreshing to see America through their eyes. I feel proud now of how giant our trucks are, and how many flavors of caffeinated beef jerky flavors we have. >> I'm just thrilled that people come here and like us. >> Yeah, I thought that they were going to either not come or come and just sort of be really upset. >> Well, to be fair, they like our snacks, they're not saying they like us. >> Yeah, I mean, some people, they're praising ranch dressing, they've never had that before. >> Yes, that's right. >> You see, they were like, we gotta bring ranch dressing to Italy. Have you seen that? I was like, I think Italy's fine. >> Yeah, don't, no, don't. That sounds like what the Olive Garden is. >> [LAUGH] >> The I think that's like ranch dressing in Italy but to get there. It also sounds like if you bring in a koala to another country, like an invasive species. >> Yeah. >> All the food turns to ranch. >> Americans are the invasive species of the world. >> Exactly, right. >> The next time you go to Italy, you're going to order lasagna and it's going to be like ranch dressing all over the place. >> Well, they're being impressed with us. The foreign fans are also really impressing Americans. One Boston bar owner, Boston and they're cheering for the word bar. >> And he says, and remember, this is Boston. He said the Scottish fans there to see the Scottish national team play. Drink like no one he's ever seen. He said they literally drank all the liquor he had in his bar. It is truly superhuman when a customer at your bar tells you it's last call. >> [LAUGH] >> And that was just like four Scottish guys. >> [LAUGH] >> All right, very good to listen. Your next quote is about somebody planning their wedding. >> It would be an era tour level production. >> That was an event producer commenting about how who could pull off the wedding. She is reportedly planning to stage at Madison Square Garden. >> There'd be none other than Taylor Swift. >> Who else, of course, Taylor Swift. [APPLAUSE] Miss Swift has reportedly reserved Madison Square Garden for her upcoming wedding. Of course, when you think about it, how could anyone start their lives together without a 45 person urinal? >> [LAUGH] >> I wonder if they a lot seating based on how much she likes you. So you're excited to be invited and then you're up in the nosebleeds. >> I mean, it is a little weird when you think about it. Apparently she's going to have a thousand guests, right? And if you could afford to have a thousand of your close friends come to your wedding, why would you do it in one of the only places in the world that can host that many people and still look empty? >> Yeah, wait, so it's going to be a thousand people in a place that holds 20,000. >> Exactly, right. >> So if you're in the nosebleeds, she really hates it. >> [LAUGH] >> Let me think about it, okay, Madison Square Garden. She's going to throw a party in Madison Square Garden, impressive. But anybody can rent Madison Square Garden. If you have the cash, she's Taylor Swift. She could do it anywhere. She could have the first wedding in the Strait of Hormuz. >> [LAUGH] >> I hear that's open now. >> Yeah, I hear she's, well, if it's not. >> [LAUGH] >> But we know that that cost $300 billion. >> That's true. >> [APPLAUSE] >> So, Alicia, your last quote is a text that was sent from a parent to their college-aged kid. As the kid was going through a Taco Bell drive-thru. >> Are you okay? Why are you in an alley? >> So that parent is among the many, many parents who are using their phones to do what? With their adult children. >> Oh, track their location? >> Yes, exactly right. This week, NPR covered a rising trend in which parents are still tracking their adult children on their phones. They ask if it was healthy for parents to keep such a close watch when their kids are independent adults. Well, the independent adult children asked, hey, mom, can I have $25? >> Yeah. >> [LAUGH] >> I do the reverse, which is I track my parents, but they don't track me. >> Well, really? >> Yeah. >> Wait, so tell me about this, what are you hoping to gain from this or are you hoping to prevent them from doing something? >> I'm preventing, I'm trying to prevent them from parting and doing hard drugs all the time. >> I have met at least, I think your mother, and she's lovely, so sweet. >> But even as you said that, I had this image of that scene in the movie Aliens where he's looking at the tracker. And it's like, my God, they're inside the wall. >> Exactly. >> There are a lot of benefits to this for the kid and not even if you're lucky enough to have your drug dealer live right next to the public library. [LAUGH] I mean, it's weird for the kid, especially as they get older, because not only are you at risk of your mom texting you, are you at a strip club? You're also at risk of your dad texting you, are you at flash dancers? [LAUGH] Is Rebecca there, or were both at flash dancers? >> Yeah, he's on his phone and waving, whoa, how did Alicia do in our quiz? >> Alicia did fantastically well, three out of three, perfect score. >> That's great, Alicia, congratulations. [APPLAUSE] >> Thank you so much for playing and enjoy your summer off. >> Thank you so much, bye. >> Thank you, bye bye. [MUSIC] >> All right, panel, now it is time for you to answer some questions about this week's news. Shane, a new study has proven scientifically what everybody has always just known. If you want French fries to taste better, just do what? >> Eat 'em. >> No, add more salt? >> No, fry 'em harder. >> No. >> Get someone else to pay for that. >> No, it doesn't, it doesn't involve someone else. >> Oh, oh, he don't want someone else to play. >> Yes, steal them. >> Yeah. >> Stolen French fries taste better. Subjects in this experiment were served French fries of their own, and then as to compare the taste to fries that they had taken from somebody else. And they said the stolen fries were crispier, saltier, and overall more enjoyable. And as for the best fries of all, just carjacks somebody in the drive. >> Wow, okay, so seagulls must be so happy. >> Exactly right, that's why they do it. >> That's why they do it. >> Look at that. >> There's a, there's a gradation, right? This is true. First, your own fries, they taste fine. Fries someone gave to you, taste better. That's true. Fries you stole from someone without their permission, taste better than that. And the tasty at fries, again proven by science, are the product of, quote, high risk covert -I feel this way, this is how I feel about money. [ Laughter ] -Yeah, if you earn it, it's fine. But if you steal it, it's great. -Yeah. -Especially high-risk, like a nice heist? -Good bank heist. -That's how Europeans felt about Native American land here. [ Laughter ] -Oh, wow. -Yeah, Spain is fine, but have you seen the Americans? -Oh, my God. -Oh, boy. -Have they tried this with other foods? Like, fries are a particularly easily stolen food. -Yeah. -It has, like, a bisque, you know. [ Laughter ] -That's how you pick the hardest food to steal. -Wow. -It's like a scooping piece. -I just imagine it -- I just imagine it, like, Tom Cruise being lowered from the ceiling and a cable with a spoon. -I saw. -Wrapping it up like a cat. -No, the best way to steal a bisque is with a piece of bread. -Oh, yeah. This is gonna be a good way, though, if it was good for other foods, it would be a good way to get kids to eat vegetables. Be like, steal that broccoli off your brother's plate. [ Laughter ] -That's actually so easy. -Delicious. ♪ I got what you want ♪ ♪ I got what you need ♪ ♪ I got what you need ♪ -Coming up, our panelist, "Key Gone," our "Bluft-Listener" game. Find out where I said it like that after the break and call one, "Triple It, Wake, Wait to Play." We'll be back in a minute with more of "Wake, Wait, Don't Tell Me" from NPR. ♪♪ -From NPR and WB Easy Chicago, this is "Wake, Wait, Don't Tell Me." The NPR news quiz, "I'm Alzo Slaid." We're playing this week with Peter Gross, Karen Chi, and Shane O'Neill. And here again is your host at the Stoodabaker Theatre in Chicago, Illinois, Peter Sago. -Thank you, Alzo. Thank you so much. [ Cheers and applause ] -Right now, it's time for the "Wake, Wait, Don't Tell Me," "Bluft-Listener" game. Call one, "Triple It, Wake, Wait to Play." Any of our games on the air? Hi, you're on "Wake, Wait, Don't Tell Me." -Hi, this is Kevin from "Climate, Not to Choose It." -Climate message, "Choose It." [ Cheers and applause ] They're at the start of Cape Cod. What do you do there? -I plot accessory dwelling units in people's backyards. -Oh, you plot secondary dwelling units in people's backyards. -That's exactly it. -I didn't understand. I thought you were saying something else with a thick Boston accent. And I couldn't understand. Do you build or do you plan? -Oh, boy. -That's really cool. That's really cool. Well, congratulations on that good work. Kevin, it's great to have you with us. You're going to play our game in which you must try to tell truth from fiction. Alzo, what's Kevin's topic? -A-ha. -A-ha. Not just what Alzo said when he finally found out where we hide at the good snacks. [ Laughter ] That, of course, was also the name of the '80s band whose song "Take On Me" became a global hit back then. The band made the news this week, though, for a rather surprising reason. Our panelists are each going to tell you about it, pick the real one, and get the weight-weighter of your choice on your voice mail. Are you ready to play? -I'm ready. -Okay, first up, it's Shane O'Neal. -Remember the music video for "A-ha's biggest hit, Take On Me?" The one where a woman is pulled into a comic book, and the animation is somehow like really impressive and really, really bad at the same time. Well, that woman has a name, Bunti Bailey. And as of last week, Bunti Bailey has an only fans. [ Laughter ] After several recent appearances at comic book conventions where she spent hours signing "A-ha" casingles, Bunti realized that she still had a devoted and very socially awkward fan base. [ Laughter ] Bunti says that she's actually rather modest, so how does she take on the challenge of adult content? Well, every time things get a little spicy, she activates an AI filter that renders her in the sketchy animated style of the music video. It's a surprise when people subscribe, she said, but most of these super fans love it. I mean, these people are super, super weird. [ Laughter ] And for the few people who are disappointed, who cares? They'll be gone! And adult! [ Cheers and applause ] [ Cheers and applause ] I'm sorry, we have to -- [ Laughter ] We have to stop all our equipment just shattered. Oh, I can do it again. Oh, no. We got it the first time. That was great. Louder? They're singing in mine. The model who starred as the heroine of the famous music video now on only fans where she uses that animated effect to keep things modest your next "A-ha" moment comes from Karen Chi. Earlier this year, after her beloved grandmother Peggy passed away, 28-year-old Madeline Michelson took on the sobering task of cleaning out her grandma's bedroom. Peggy had been a meticulous woman who'd served as treasurer in multiple clubs and kept records of her finances throughout her life. So when Michelson came across yet another three-ring binder, she assumed it to be some more boring tax documents. But she was wrong. Inside, she found something else. Pages and pages of obsessive details about her grandma's celebrity crushes. Said Michelson lovingly, "Oh, my God. Grandma was a freak." It's true. The innocuously plain binder was actually a hand-written log about men like George Clooney and Matthew McConaughey complete with carefully cut and pasted photos and facts including their zodiac signs. But even more surprising, the man featured the most, '80s band Ah Ha's frontman Morton Harkett, proving that no matter how old you are, you can always be a tween girl with questionable taste. Losing a loved one is difficult for so many reasons, including the fact that you wish you'd ask more questions when they were alive. And this is definitely true for Michelson who'd give anything to turn back time and ask, "Grandma, what the hell?" A woman finds her grandma's file of her favorite huddies and the huddest of them, the lead singer of Ah Ha. Your last story of an Ah Ha Ennick don't come from Peter Groose. In the wake of their thrilling NBA championship this week, the New York mix revealed an unlikely secret to success. The Ah Ha song, "Hunting High and Low." The brooding track about the obsessive search for a lost love was their pre-game hype song. As their star guard, Jalen Brunson told The New York Post, "Most teams go with high energy hip hop, but my favorite music they get psyched to is Moody Nordic Pop." After they lost game three to the spurs, Brunson knew the team needed a down tempo kick in the pants, so he lit some aroma therapy candles, dim the lights, and played them the following lyrics. She sound asleep, and she's sweeter now than the wildest dreams. There's no end to the lengths I'll go "Hunting High and Low." I explained to Kat OG and the others that it works pretty well if you just replace she with NBA championship, said Brunson. It's a trick that worked really well in the 90s when the Chicago Bulls used to sing the Neil Diamond song, "Sweet NBA Championship." Buh, buh, buh. All right. So Ah Ha popped up in our feeds this week for one of these reasons. Was it from Shane, the model from the video, now on OnlyFan, showing off her animated self, from Karen Chi, a woman found that her grandmother's meticulous records of Hutties praised the lead singer of Ah Ha as the hottest of them all, or from Peter Gross, turns out the secret to the next championship was adopting the little-known Ah Ha Ballad "Hunting High and Low" as their fight song. Goodness gracious. Goodness gracious and deep, sir. You know, I think it's because Shane hit the note so perfectly. I might have to go with Shane's story. You've chosen Shane's story. To bring you the correct answer, we spoke to an expert on the real one. There are points in time when people seek, again, the celebrity crushes they had in their adolescence. That was Chapman University Professor and Crush Researcher, Dr. Rebecca Tokachinsky talking about Grandma's Secret Binder. Ah! I'm afraid you didn't win our game, but you did earn a point for Shane, and I think he deserved one for that before. Yes, and I will do a recording on your voicemail for free. I know. I can sing that song no doubt. Maybe the tone, even. I will say we've been talking about this song all week in our office, and now here on stage, and none of us but Shane had the guts to actually try to sing it. So there you go. Congratulations, Shane. Thank you so much for calling and playing with us. So you can look, bye-bye. And now the game we call Not My Job. Almost as soon as it was published, Carol Claire Burke's novel "Yesteryear" was declared the Book of the Summer. The story of a tradwife influencer who has to survive after being transported mysteriously to the 1850s was an instant bestseller. It's already being developed into a movie starring Anne Hathaway, and we're so excited. Carol Claire Burke is joining us here on what is undoubtedly the NPR news quiz of the summer. Carol Claire Burke, welcome to "Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me." Thank you, thank you for having me. It's a pleasure to talk to you. I devoured your book this week, like millions of other people really enjoyed it. It's a thrill to talk to you. I would summarize the book as "Tradwife gets tratted." That's me. How would you do it? Oh, I think that you're one step ahead of me. I think that's a really, really nice summary. Mine's usually much longer. Because I imagined, and I have no idea how it actually happened, when you first came up with the idea, it was so simple. What if you took one of these tradwife influencers who always praises the old way of living and you actually made her do that against your work? Yeah, I mean, I'd like to sound smarter, but that's exactly what happened. It was that elevator pitch, and then it was the title yesterday, and then I was kind of off to the races. Were you, as you came up with that, I know you've been a media and writing about these people, but were you like a fan of these people, the real tradwife influencers? I think that I was kind of obsessed with the videos, and I didn't get why, because I have a degree, I'm a working woman, I'm secular, and I was like obsessed with buying a honey bee oven, and I didn't understand why. I was like, what's happening to me? And so I think because of that, I really decided to start researching the visuals a little bit more, 'cause I kept seeing them on mine. I feel I should ask this. I hope for other people of like mine. What is a honey bee oven? Okay, I don't exactly know. But it's beautiful, it's great, you have to have one. Yes, if I can pay an artisanal carpenter to make me one from scratch, I think that my life will probably improve. Right. Now, speaking of your life improving, this is an extraordinary story of how your first novel became the subject of a bidding war between publishers and then a bidding war in Hollywood producers, even before it was published, which is pretty cool, I have to admit. But I understand you had your share of rejection before that? I did, yes, I was rejected for about a decade prior to that. Not this particular book, but by other ideas and other book ideas, and people are like, yeah, no. Yeah, exactly. I think that it's good to build a healthy skin when you're a writer, and I certainly did so by just applying to everything and always getting told no. Right. And have you had your limo driver take you around to all those offices? No, but I really enjoyed. I had a few screenshots where I was like, this person's going to know that this was their email. Oh, yeah, I saw that. You were showing on TV some of the rejections you got, because I imagine that was like, we don't watch you here at HarperCollins where I am the editor. But I mean, it must have been a little weird because this is every writer's dream. You know, you're sitting there, you're working in this novel, and you're saying, oh, my God, the Hollywood's going to go nuts for this, there'll be a bidding war. In your case, there was. Yeah. How weird was that? Oh, it's psychotic. I still don't fully believe it. And I think that's probably a good thing. I think it's probably been a blessing for me that I don't really. I've been very dissociative, so that's a problem for my future therapist. Yeah, I see. It's like, future therapist. Let's talk about the fact you're not in therapy. That's fascinating. I wouldn't have written this book if I was in therapy. I wouldn't have just a book in a second. But your character, as I've said, the principal character, Natalie, is a tradwife influencer. The novel has the feel of reality. Like, this must be what it's like to be a tradwife influencer or an influencer. You're not one. How did you find out what their lives are like? Well, a lot of this book is about misinformation. And so, part of the -- without giving any spoilers away, I didn't really take much time to try to embody any one tradwife influencer. It was more just getting into the mind of a woman who doesn't want to be in the world anymore. And that was kind of where I had a jumping off point from. Yeah, I know you had to say that it's not based on anyone for legal reasons, but really, who is it? Once we get off this video, just text me. Okay, okay. That's great, that's great. Because, apparently, there's like a lot of people saying, "Oh, I think it's this person." Or, I think there's like one tradwife influencer who's got a farm just like Natalie does. And she's like, "No, it's not me. It's really not me." Which I guess is also flattering that people are having to deny being your model. Yeah, I don't think anyone would publicly come out and say, "Yes, I am Natalie." And so, that's kind of a nice defensive reflex for my book in that way. And I say this with all sympathy. And maybe I'm not going to ask you the question, but I'll ask how you're dealing with the question. Someone like you who has an amazingly successful, deservedly so debut as a novelist or anything else, always gets asked, "Well, what are you going to do next?" Have you come up with a way of dealing with that question? Oh, that's not even the top five of the question I get asked on this tour. Yeah, I mean, I'm writing. I'll keep writing long after people aren't reading my book. I mean, I've always been a writer, so yeah, I'm working on my next novel. Is it also going to be about another internet subculture? Yeah, the working title is "Yesterday or Two, Natalie and Space." (Laughter) Yeah, I mean, I got it, just like that. (Applause) Well, Carol Clairberg, it is a pleasure to talk to you. And we have asked you here to play a game we're calling. "Yesterday year, Meet Yearbook." Your hit novel is called "Yesterday Year." So we thought we'd ask you about "Year Books." And so we toured a few questions about those wonderful souvenirs of times we would rather not remember. (Laughter) And you will win a prize for one of our listeners. The voice of anyone they might choose from our show. Alzo, who is author Carol Clairberg playing for? Katrina Anderson of Manchester, Massachusetts. All right, you ready to play? Are you Katrina? I'll try. Here's your first question. When he was nominated for the Supreme Court some years ago, the high school yearbook of Neil Gorsuch came under some scrutiny. Why? A, he was voted by his class Most Pompous. B, he adjokingly listed himself as a member of the, quote, "Fascism Forever Club." (Laughter) Or C, someone had written in it "Have a great summer and overturn Roe v. Wade." (Laughter) I'm going to go with B, "Fascism Forever." That's right. (Applause) And I should say, a boy could dream, as he was making a little joke, as far as we know there was, yeah, there was no, as far as we know, there was no fascism forever club at Georgetown Prep in those years. All right, here's your next question. Despite the yearbook club's best efforts, and we know they work hard, sometimes errors slip through as in which of these, which happened to a Rhode Island school this month, the cover of the yearbook featured a misspelled word, "school." (Laughter) B, all of the photos in the yearbook were of the graduating class of 1926, or C, every single senior was listed as a member of the Model Railway Club. (Laughter) I'm going to go with A. You're going to go with A, they misspelled the word "school." You're right. (Applause) So that's a -- that's a -- that's a great name. That's a bad typo, yes. But in future years, the 2026 yearbook from Johnston Senior High Shoal will be quite valuable. (Laughter) You're doing very well here. Here's your last question. This spring, as well. Also this spring, parents at an elementary school in Florida complained because their yearbook featured what? Was it A, a retiring cafeteria lady, quoted as saying, "No more shoveling slop to tots." (Laughter) Or be a joke picture of the teachers all doing shots in the faculty lounge or see a picture of a toddler flipping the bird. (Laughter) Ooh. This is Florida. It is, yes. (Laughter) So all bets are off. Yeah, this is Florida. So I'm going to go with -- I'm going to go with B. You're going to go with B, a joke picture of the teachers all doing shots in the faculty lounge. I am sure that's happened. But this particular yearbook brought some criticism because it featured a picture of a toddler with her middle finger raised. (Laughter) And here's the best part. It was part of an ad placed by that child's parents. (Laughter) You know, one of those congratulations, graduate ads, they thought it was cute. (Laughter) Alzo, how did Carol Burke do in our quiz? She did enough two out of three, which is good for me. There you go. (Applause) Carol Burke's bestselling book is "Yesterday Year Carol Burke." Thank you so much for joining us on "Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me." It's a pleasure to talk to you. And thanks for the book. (Applause) Take care. Thank you. (Music) In just a minute, a handbag 65 million years in the making. That's in our "Listener Lumeric Challenge." Go on "Triple Eight, Wait, Wait" to join us in the air. We'll be back in a minute with more "Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me." From NPR. (Music) From NPR and WB Easy Chicago, this is "Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me." The NPR News Quiz. I'm Alzo Slade. We're playing this week with Peter Gross, Shane O'Neal and Karen Chi. And here again is your host at the Student Baker Theatre in Chicago, Illinois. Peter Sago. Thank you, Alzo. Thank you so much, everybody. In just a minute, it's the game the anti-Lumeric Media doesn't want you to know about. (Laughter) It's our "Listener Lumeric Challenge." If you'd like to play, give us a call of "One Triple Eight, Wait, Wait." That's 1-888-924-8924. Right now, I'll panel some more questions for you from the week's news. Shane, this week we learned about a new trend in travel. Catering to people who want to spend their vacations doing what? Stay inside for their vacations. That's almost right. It's usually an inside activity, but it's nice to do it sometimes by the pool if the lights good. - This is the last time they called the police. (audience laughs) Oh, reading? - Yes, reading, vacation packages for people that just want to read, they're offering vacation packages, built entirely around, quote, reading and relaxing. And no one's happier about this trend than your introverted niece, who's wondering, if she can just read in your office after dinner, if that's okay, these packages are aimed at those people who want to go on vacation, but they don't want to go parasailing, thank you. They just want two hours to read by the pool without interruption. Forget sandals, we found the perfect resort for you, it's called spotty wifi, it's called chairs. (audience laughs) This is actually true, my friend Eric, he and his husband have been doing this for years, where they go on two vacations a year, the adventure vacation, where they like go parasailing or whatever, and then the reading vacation, where they just choose a body of water and read next to it. - That sounds amazing, do you think they're looking for a third? (audience laughs) - Maybe, but I don't think it's you. (audience laughs) - I'm listening and I'm learning. - Where do you have a brother or cousin? (audience laughs) - This is a true story, I once took a book on vacation. - Wow, congratulations. - That's it? - That's all I wanted to say. - Was this one of the ones you wrote peed and wrote on? (audience laughs) - No, sadly, nobody reads those. (audience laughs) No, so I've been really, really distracted and hadn't really been able to focus in the book, so I took it on vacation, and once I got on vacation, I started, I opened it up to where I had left off, and I said, "You know, I've been so spotty about my reading, "I can't remember what's going on, "I'll start again from the beginning." But vacation itself was so distracting that I actually didn't get as far in the book as I had in the first attempt, so by the end of the vacation, I had read minus 75 pages of a book, which I thought was impressive. And then when you told this story, your wife was like, "I'm going on my own vacation next year." (audience laughs) Well, yes, but that is nothing to do with that. (audience laughs) Karen, a home organization expert has found that the reason many people can't declutter their homes is that they believe there is such a thing as nice, desirable, what? - Trash. - Right. Nice garbage, nice trash, nice clutter. - Oh, what? - Nice garbage is defined for these purposes as trash that for some reason you think is just too nice to throw out, even though you have no use for it, like really pretty shopping bags from a nice store or empty glass sauce jars, they'll be useful for something or shoe boxes from a particularly expensive brand. You look at that shoe box, you don't need it, but you think, man, there's going to be a day when we do need that shoe box, that hamster can't live forever. (audience laughs) - Peter, I'm gently panicking. I've got so many nice little glass bottles. - Yeah, that's-- - Yeah. And I didn't know what to use them for, but they're too nice to throw away, so I filled them with cereal. - You can't throw that cereal out. - Look at Han, so you have nice bottles. Like what came in the mergely? What kind of bottles were talking about? - They're like juice bottles. - Juice bottles. - But they're like glass. - What kind of cereal are you fitting in that small little hole? - Well, this is the problem is I bought cereal to put in the-- - Wait a minute, so you were just like, so you were like, wait a minute, I've got these bottles, I have no use for them, I don't want to throw out. You know what would be look really decorative if I filled them with fruity pebbles? - Yeah. - Say, listen, you joke, this is my life. - Wait a minute, Karen. - What do you do with that gorgeous fruity pebbles box? (laughter) - 'Cause you can't throw that away. (upbeat music) - Coming up, it's lightning filled in the blank, but first it's the game where you have to listen for the rhyme, if you'd like to play on air, call, or leave a message, at 1-triple-late, wait, wait. That's 1-888-924-8-924. You can see it's most weeks right here at the Studebaker Theater in beautiful downtown Chicago. You can also catch us on the road, we'll be at the beautiful Riverside Theater in Milwaukee on July 9th. Thank you, Milwaukee and/or Riverside Theater fans, and at the Green Music Center in Sonoma, California on July 30th. (cheering) Thank you, I like every place has its ambassadors. That's wonderful. (laughter) For tickets and information about all our life events, just go over to nprpresents.org. Hi, Ron, where do I wait, don't tell me. - Hey, Beard, this is Andrew calling from Kansas City. - Hey, Andrew, how are things in beautiful Kansas City? Place out loud. - There and great, we got the World Cup here, so. - Really? I didn't realize that, I haven't been noticing the venues. What teams are playing there, and have you met any of their fans walking around Kansas City? - I haven't met me yet, but I think we have Argentina has stayed here, England's stayed here. There's two others that I don't, Objiri is here. - So obviously you're a very invested fan. - I really am, yeah. - Right, right. Well, welcome to the show, Andrew. Alzo Slade right here is gonna read you three, news related Lemrex, but he's gonna stop before he finishes. He's gonna leave out the last word or phrase, you have to fill that in. If you do that two times out of three, you will win our prize, the voice of anyone you might choose from our show for your voice mail. Are you ready to go? - I'm ready. - Here's your first Lemrex. Growing dinosaur skin needs no pretext, and this great leather bag is the key flex. Our lab-grown concoction is now up for auction. It's a purse with the skin from a T-Rex. - Yes, a T-Rex. This week, a purse made from the recreated skin of a Tyrannosaurus Rex one upper auction in Europe. Why a T-Rex? Because nobody can name even one other dinosaur. (laughing) And by the way, if you're trying and failing, Barney does not count. (laughing) Now you might be thinking, wait, they found a living T-Rex and immediately killed it to make proper purse. That's ballsy, no. What happened was they grew synthesized skin in a lab from some protein found in a T-Rex fossil, and then they took that synthesized skin and made a purse. So if you've ever wondered, what was that the gift shop at Jurassic Park? (laughing) Now, you know. - More like Jurassic Park Avenue, am I right? - Oh my God. (laughing) - I actually read about this story ahead of time. Have you seen the purse? - I have not myself seen the purse. - Well, it looks like a bag made of T-Rex skin. (laughing) And if I'm right, I think it sold for like a quarter of the asking price. I think they would, they'd price it at like $600,000 and it sold for like $32,000. - Wow. - A steal, you mean as it were. (laughing) All right, very good. Here is your next limerick. - Though lost teeth and sharp falls make a shake, they are not what jolt's most folks awake. What breaks nightly bliss is a slither and hiss. The world dreams of a poisonous snake. - Snake, yes, according to search data, the thing people all over the world dream about most are snakes. - What? - And yes, people do Google the meaning of their dreams and it turns out, you look at the data, most often they Google, "Why do the penises "I dream about all appearous snakes?" (laughing) - Turns out that this data is regionally sorted out. Most snake dreams happen in countries with high snake populations, make sense, right? You're scared of something, it's a source of tension, anxiety, it shows up in your dreams. That's why I'm always dreaming about my biggest fear, sitting on something wet on the train. (laughing) - So like if you're in a country with a lot of snakes, everyone's dreaming of snakes. - People most often have bad dreams about snakes. - So if you go to the suburbs, everyone's having dreams about golden doodles. (laughing) It's back, right? (laughing) - I did move to LA last year and I have had nightmares about traffic. - There you are, I see. - Proving the thing, there you are. Here is your last limbic, Andrew. - Our dexterous side is quite deft, while the other ones weak and bereft. And yet when we walk, we will counter the clock. In a crowd, we all turn to the left. - Yes, human beings, it turns out, all, every one of us has a natural tendency to turn left to move in a counterclockwise direction. And scientists have no idea why. When moving in crowds, people veered to the left. Then it's one step to the right. And you do the time warp again. (laughing) - So the Brits are right when they drive on that side of the street. - They were sort of late. - They were more in touch with their feelings, which is the first time anybody has ever said that about Brits. (laughing) - Also, how did Andrew do in our quiz? - Three out of three, great job, Andrew. - Congratulations, Andrew, well done. (clapping) - Thank you. - You've won our prize, the voicemail of your choice, and a T-Rex purse, no one else wanted it. (laughing) Thank you for playing, Andrew. - Perfect, bye-bye. - Thanks, Peter. Thank you. (upbeat music) (upbeat music) - It's time for our final game, Lightning Fill in the Blank. Each of our players will have 60 seconds to which to answer as many fill in the blank questions about the week's news. As they can, each correct answer, now worth two points. Alzo, can you give us the scores? - Yes, Peter has two Karen and Shane are tied up at three. - Oh, slow. - Hey. (laughing) - So Karen and Shane are tied for first. Peter, you're in seconds, that means you go first. Here we go, the clock will start when they begin your first question fill in the blank. On Wednesday, Donald Trump signed a peace plan with blank. - Iran. - Right, on Thursday, the Supreme Court ruled that the government cannot ban marijuana users from owning blanks. - Perifidmail you? - No guns, this week tropical storm Arthur became the first named storm of the 2026 Atlantic blank season. - Hurricane. - Right, on Thursday, blanks presidential, center opened here in Chicago. Oh gosh, Obama. Right, Barack Obama's a new study found roommates, roommates, you're 26% of their blank with each other. DNA. No mouth bacteria. You don't kiss your roommates. Okay, live that way. In Argentina's first game at this year's World Cup Soccer Superstar Blank scored a hat trick. Leona Messi. Messi indeed, on Wednesday, Tom Holland confirmed he'd married blank in a private ceremony. Mrs. Holland, no. I don't know who he's dating. She married, he married Zendaya, the actress. This week a woman in Arizona who was ticketed for going 108 miles per hour and a 65 mile per hour zone explained to police she was only speeding so she could blank. She was only speeding so that she could get to Tom Holland and Zendaya's wedding. No, she was going that fast so she could make it home in time to watch Love Island. The Arizona Highway Patrol clocked this woman driving 108 miles per hour and they managed to pull her over somehow. And when they did, she said she was only speeding so that she did not miss Love Island. The police charged her with quote criminal speed. That's a real thing. And reminded her the opening credits of Love Island are like 40 minutes long. You don't need to rush. Also, how did Peter Gross do in our quiz? He did all right. He got four right for eight more points, which for now puts him in the lead with 10. Thank you. Awesome. For now. I'm an arbitrarily pick Shane to go next. Here we go, Shane fill in the blank. On Tuesday, the UK announced it was banning kids under 16 from using blank. Social media. Right on Monday, the FBI said it had thwarted an attack on the blank event held at the White House. The UFC. Right. This week, world leaders met in France for the blank summit. G7. Right. This week, a four ton elephant brought out to surprise guests at the Texas State Republican Convention Blanked during Governor Greg Abbott's keynote speech. Took a leak all over the convention hall floor. That's right. This week, young brands announced the sale of struggling pizza chain blank. Oh God, this is going to break my heart, little Caesars. No pizza hot. Oh, thank God. The tragic ending of a performance of Romeo and Juliet in Turkey was interrupted by blank orange cats. Yes, a cat walking on the stage and biting Romeo's hair as he was supposed to be dead. Amazingly, the performer is managed to keep it together when the tragic ending of Romeo and Juliet was interrupted by a stray cat getting into the stage and playfully biting the punitively dead Romeo's hair. It's not the cat's fault, though. This is just what the producers get for casting an open can of tuna to play Romeo. Also, how to chain doing our quiz. You did well. You got five right for 10 more points, which gives him a total of 13 and the lead. All right. How many then does Karen need to win? Five to tie six to win. Here we go, Karen. This is for the game. Fill in the blank on Thursday. A million fans attended the parade celebrating the New York Blanks NBA tournament win. Next. Right. For the first time since March, the average price of blank fell below $4 a gallon. Yes. Right. This week Kevin Wars held his first meeting as the chairman of the blank. The Fed. Federal Reserve. This week a lawmaker in Connecticut was criticized after he blanked during an event celebrating firefighters. Uh, burped. No, parked in an emergency fire lane on Wednesday. Africa CDC warned that the blank outbreak in the Democratic Republic of Congo may be its worst ever. Ebola. Right on Monday, New York wine bar lay was named best new restaurant of the blank awards. James Beard. Yes, even though it's still ongoing, the best headline of this year's Pride Month is blank. Uh, yay, gay pride. Best headline for this year's Pride Month so far is, quote, "Enemy, lesbian, nuns, quit, convent, and marry each other." Enemy, lesbian, nuns. Tale is old as time. Do nuns apparently hated each other, but after deciding cloistered life wasn't in fact for them, they left the convent, moved in together to save money, and they finally confessed their feelings for each other while watching a romcom called Love in the Villa. And they'd been together ever since. So delightful the two look forward to getting married someday and walking down the aisle to that classic gay anthem of a Maria. Alzo did, Karen, she'd do well enough to win. Nope. But she got far right for Tim Moore points, which makes her tired, which change the late art coach. Just a minute, we're going to ask our panelists to predict what will be the big surprise at Taylor Swift's wedding. But first, let me tell you that, wait, wait, don't tell me, is a production of NPR and WBEZ, Chicago, an association with urgent haircut productions, Doug Berman, Ben Neville and Doverlord, Phillip Gautica writes, our limb ricks, our public address announcer is Paul Friedman. Our ops manager is Jisira Vardak, thanks to the staff and crew here at the Stu DeBicker Theatre, BJ, lead event, composed our theme, our program is produced by Jennifer Mills, Miles Dornboss and Lillian King. Special thanks this week to Blythe Robertson. Peter Gwynn is our tradwife. And the joy is our vibe to yourator, technical direction is from Lord of White, our CFO is Colin Miller, our production manager is Robert Newhouse, our senior producer, is Ian Chilog and the executive producer. Wait, wait, don't tell me, is Mr. Mike Danforth. Now a panel, what will be the big surprise at Taylor Swift's Madison Square Garden wedding, Shane O'Neill, the chicken dance, Taylor's version, Karen Chi, their first kiss is going to be on the kiss gown. Oh, finally Peter Gross, she won't invite her parents but they're going to show up anyway because they tracked her there on their phones. And if any of that happens, panel will ask you about it on, wait, wait, don't tell me. Thank you, I'll don't slay, thanks Austin, this Shane O'Neill, Karen Chi, Peter Gross. Thanks for our fabulous audience here at the Souther Baker Theatre in downtown Chicago, Illinois. Thanks to all of you for listening wherever you might be. On Peter's Saga, we'll be back with you next week. This is NPR.