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up now it only takes a few minutes chime is a fintech not a bank banking services and chime card provided by chimes bank partners qualifying direct deposits required terms and limits apply go to chime dot com slash disclosures for details now on to the rest of the episode you should know podcast hey everybody welcome back to you should know podcast episode two thirty nine we got cars cam back in the studio round of applause please welcome back to the studio of the the episodic rendition of you know podcast we're almost in the two forties looking like a crime scene can I say that can I just point it out immediately so the itch can stop in my brain someone has died here it it's getting to this it's getting close to spooky it is no we're in spooky season is getting close to the spooky night to the climax of spookiness yes to the Halloween to the oh spooky um no we we're one episode away from the Halloween special where we will dress up we're doing something very special next week uh next week's episode where cams picking my outfit I'm picking cams already bought his outfit and you know it's a humiliation ritual that okay now I have to return years oh you buy something very humble what were you but would you buy me green lantern really yeah oh like a light skin green lantern that go to be like we're baked in some Jason Tatum themes oh yeah it would have been real awkward so that's coming back I'm so I'm I'm I'm humiliated um I find it a little sexy is the bottom of my get me hanging out I gotta see how you wear it I don't know I don't know it depends on how you decide to where we're gonna lose thongs not lives no outfit comes with a thong I don't know I don't want to expose it too much but it is tight clothing I'll put that out there it's oh you know I'm not good with tight no you might need to bring like a small tie your little moves oh I can hide the moves I'm talking about the cinnamon right here oh no yeah that one's not getting in that one's out for the public to see oh my god oh I'm dressing I'm gonna dress you like a slutty secretary oh it's hot oh no oh but you're too long it's I mean there's gonna be the amount of body hair that's gonna be visible on you that's my new goal how much body hair of you can I show dude Sarah got mad at me like for that the other day because I shaved my tuffed and like I shaved it like two months ago and I don't know if I have a slight case of the alopeche it never goes back he is not come back to say hello that's good though no I know your tought is disgusting dude I don't care what you say it's gross Sarah loves my tuff and so like she'll like be play like she likes to just go back there and like play with the bat my lower the small of my back it talk about this while talking about back hair is diabolical yes she likes to play with it and then she'll like go back there and there's nothing there and she'll literally look at me in disguise and be like you're not the same that is okay first off speaking of you and Sarah y'all just got back from a sick trip you got to tell me you got to let you know you got to tell me oh yeah we so mean Sarah took a little couple strip to Nashville into that we went to Kane Brown's Halloween party at his bar Kane Brown's on Broadway if you want to go visit it it's a very fantastic place oh was it how was it Nashville was fun but the way to Nashville wasn't fun because my girlfriend and Sarah almost left me the other day she almost my girlfriend almost broke up with me the other day why this okay off rib before you say anything in it and Sarah I hope you see this I I believe her I believe her and she's she's justified I go this is too much in this it's okay honestly what I but the reason is the reason she's planning on leaving me doesn't make sense to me because I think everybody does this planning on leaving is insane planning on leaving someone to say she's like two weeks two more weeks she has to get her bearings right yeah just change her ID back to her old address okay but okay so we took a flight to Nashville and I like to fly with a pillow I have a personal pillow right I have my favorite pillow you fly with a pillow yes I mean that's flight 101 once you get to like frequent flyer miles oh I want to get to super elites that is gold I'm going now buddy I didn't have great they upgraded me come on now talk to me um no so um me and Sarah live together let's start back there me and Sarah live together and we sleep together in the say we share a bed yeah now she moved into my house she did before her I was single bachelor rock star I was sick I mean I was so cool and now I never oh my god I dropped in all and now now I've lived alone since college I left college in 2020 right that was about my last year of college so it's been like six years since I've been out of college yeah I haven't changed my bedding since I left college six years ago are you out of your are you out of your mind and now understand that might come off as crazy oh it comes off as filthy comes up as filth like rags like nasty okay but once my girlfriend moved in with me she said no we're getting rid of this bedding right so we got new bedding new sheets Egyptian conti thread counts I mean we're doing the whole thing silky it's sexy in there but I told her I love my pillow I have this one pillow that I've had since high school that I've taken to college with me and now it isn't come with me and my adulthood it's like it is my pillow to my comfort pillow I can't sleep without this pillow and she's disgusted about this pillow right Felizo yeah and she didn't know she knew that that pillow was dingy but she didn't know that's a decade long pillow she's starting to leave me because I won't get rid of this college pillow Hayden that's gross how she's it's a pill do you know okay off rip do you know how many times you've probably gone to sleep sweaty a little drunken night you lay that nasty head down on that pillow you and god god knows you're not washing it god god knows you're what he literally knows you're not watching like he's like oh yeah that's a disgusting pillow no I didn't but she does now she'll wash the pillow she needs to just throw it away she bro you why okay outside of it your comfort first off don't buy it's that you don't have a favorite pillow I've gone through pillows like like like beer like oh today's the corona oh today's a medello I don't care about a pillow really I've I changed pillows probably for two years wow one cleanness tube I my body it gets used to either stiff or firmer or comfy right so I need to switch it up that's so crazy to me like I have like I have a certain arrangement of maybe this is the tism talking it might be like I have a certain positioning of pillows and how like I know how my roll around patterns are at night so I know this is like my 2 a.m. pillow this is my start off pillow this is my wake up pillow and I have them all like laid out to where I normally rotate how many pillows do you sleep with how many pills do you sleep with on a bed one you I sleep with one pill I start with two so I can be upright while me and my wife are watching our show when it's time to go to bed the secondary the upright firm pillow goes to the ground and then I am asleep on my one pillow let's hold on that is absolutely no wonder you're pillow like a like quasi-moto you're in that go to sleep like don't make fun of us goal the only two a.m. pillow you're like that 4 a.m. you're like this and there's just pillows all around you and I sleep like this no way you sleep with two two one pillow I sleep with one pillow there's no every night of my life I sleep with one pillow can you don't have to do that you're not a prisoner that's prison work that's not that is not prison work that's spinal health I sleep with spinal that is spinal health no it's not you're sleeping on my heels I sleep with eight pillows two decorative ones the two decorative ones hit the floor before we get in the bed but I have eight pillows on my bed so you need to tell me that's childish behavior to have less than four pillows on the bed it's childish you're seeing an opposite children used to sleep with multiple pillows I slept with no pillows as a kid I didn't have a pillow you're a you're a bug rat you're a bug rat oh my god you followed no honor system no coat you were never single as a kid I had four as a kid I had four pillows as a kid I had four pillows right two and two that's how you sleep as a kid no because you need the comfort you're scared of the goose three goblins in the in the in the ghouls in your room - What is that called pillows? - As a grown man.
You're going to sleep and you're waking up all it it's a it's a transportation system to breakfast No, as an adult I have early onset sciatica. I need the most cover I can get That's what you do Bro, believe it or not. Hey, okay since okay Sarah loves you. She doesn't love you enough I love you enough to tell you you are Ruining your spine how how do you okay? Show me how you sleep is six pillows and other human in the How how are you sleeping? I don't stack this six pillows all the time If you want to sleep like this, this is fine. You're like I know you don't stack them. I'm saying didn't they spread out. There's like three on the head There's another person. Okay, there's one big bad. There's what it's it's oh, it's a king I have a king to oh, it's a cally king. You wanted to be a cally king. It's a regular king take a Portland king It's a charlotte king. Yeah, you you king now. There's another human now you each have respectfully one pillow And now it's throw two more in there and now let's throw two more in there And you probably get in the bed with the decorative zone, but then you get rid of it. I kick them off Yeah, so you were asleep with another human in six pillows, right? I feel I feel Crammed in my bed with live in my pillow you I know you are sleeping Literally like a family guy fall you're asleep like this at night And waking up talking about I need it for my back. That's what's killing your back. That's what's killing your spine If I stand up, I'm straight you stand up. You're like that and that's and I sleep with one pillow. No, okay So basically we just line the headboard with the pillows. It's almost like trench warfare It's like like if the krius coming and so it's like you got a lot of Line it up, right? Like we're we're an afghan on our headboards. Okay, so we can duck on Yes, so there's two pillows there. No from headboard to headboard. We can feel like three to four So you have four pillows at the headboard one two three four and it's lying the whole headboard and then I have one like On my outside facing towards the floor, right? Okay, so in case I fall or like That's a problem like my wake-up area. I'm right there like halfway leaned off But I'm on a pillow. So I have support if you're leaned off the bed and you're still asleep I mean you need medication and then I have one on my back of my neck So I'm I'm stacked up to here so I can roll around and that's my moot my favorite pillow I take it and I move it around the whole night like this is coming with me. She's not leaving me She's but she's really like flat almost like she like she has no spinal is now is Now is the head the favorite one nasty decade old the move around the transportation was my favorite. That's even more Why I know you and your body I know in your single days You would go to sleep with barbecues sauce in your chest hair. Yes, sir. I know that you would sweat I know there was other bodily fluids and you mean to tell me you're just sitting there hug and rinsing and rolling around in this pillow You had it for 10 that that I've never woken up not sweaty I never woke it up dry ever in my life I'm about to throw up and you so for at least 10 years at least 10 that is 1,650 days actually 57 because that's that's two leap years 3,657 days that you've woken up sweaty holding that pillow. Yeah, and you mean to tell me that you think Sarah's in the wrong because she wants you to throw away That is the growth. I don't know a human being that has a grocery pillow I don't walk into somebody's house. I don't want into somebody's job and tell them how to make burritos I don't do that. That's a burrito. They don't walk into my house to tell me how to sleep sleep is the most important thing You have to be comfortable. That's how I'm comfortable. Okay, for the love of God Can you not just get a different hold and squeeze and hug and turn pillow? Why does that have to be that stain one? I have hoarding things. I it's hard for me Hey, I am fully I love you to death. You're my rider die, and I love you down. I'm a hundred percent team sir I am what now leaving you. I don't know, but they're my she would discuss it. Like she is like I'm equally discussing Yeah, that's fuck that is gross. Yeah, it's bad. That's gross And I understand I understand that it's probably not the most ideal thing, but that's who I am and I don't Agree with people in relationships that do that. I don't agree with you know what you signed up for. You know, okay You know you sign up for a creature like me like that comes with all kind of quirks and might be a couple fleas. Okay But I agree, but you can't be just hell bent and this is me and I'm not changing Mm-hmm. You can if you want a very maybe long life and not so lucky in the love department Well, I mean you've been very lucky Oh, I even remember your name. You used to call your job But they're Compromise compromise I do a compromise fat. I shower every night. I brush my teeth every night I literally have been doing that. You know Sarah's proud of me itch because of you Sarah's been more proud of me because I've been brushing every night and my teeth are getting wider. They are getting wider I didn't realize how bad my mouth was before I mean it was gross. How'd she'll talk to me up close? I'm not gonna lie. I told you over And you just said you what I just make you But it's compromise she wants you to get rid of the dirty pillow. You get rid of it You can't you be like you know that I was this confident creature quasi-modo hunts back son of a And that's what I'm gonna be yeah, cuz what if set what if Sarah had some weird thing that you didn't necessarily like You love all if say it stays 100% you love 99% of her now one thing just itches your brain bad. Yeah, I do you should feel Loved enough and secure enough to go up and be like hey, I love you, but I hate that I bought her laser hair removal for her I just can't get rid of that Pillow if you didn't that hurt let her buy you a good pill. There you go. We're calling you. Yeah. Okay. We'll call it even She buys you a good pill. Yeah. Oh my god. Yeah, honestly, that's the thing if you want to change something about me buy it for me I like that that we'll do that This episode is brought to you by him's I guys It's starting to feel like that good old shabang bang time of the bedroom is always scheduled You know what I mean like you got it on the calendar It's on your skylight you're going over there. You're like oh shabang bang time scheduled and sometimes even you got a rescheduled You got to call in we like you know what hey, haha not today, you know bring back some spot in 80 That's what it's all about and you do that with him's it's not about managing a condition or treating a symptom It's about having that shabang bang life you want remember that good old shabang bang that fight you had come on Him's combines personalized treatment plans and 100% online process. There's no offices and no pharmacy line No awkward conversations. 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What is that? Why kids? Did y'all ever like did you ever have a moment in your life where you're like I I want to join a gang like I want to try to be a gang member I tried to create a gang. I was younger. I made a Facebook page and everything quick. I don't think that's okay Quickly realize Facebook page of my gang. It doesn't really give it much credit. What was a gang called bloody diamonds? I remember you talked about the same thing them right. Yeah, and it was literally is pretty much our net It was like your gutter game. Yeah, like now you actually used gang in the title not the smartest Then we'll go we're the bloods gang. We're the bloods So we said bloods are cool. I like read more than blue bloody bloody diamonds. Don't know why that literally Google searched Bloody diamond images found a picture and that was our profile picture So interesting to me that that that's like interesting for you like that That's something you would aspire to be is like put your life at risk. I like why that's the thing though We had no ill no ill will no bad. It could have we literally created this page and we got on it to talk about when we were playing video games Like there was no there was not a single devious. Yeah, single nefarious tech sit. Yeah, you couldn't it was the fakes gang of all time I have a question for you though about gangs and stuff. I watched this movie. It's one of my favorite movies I watched it again the other day. It's called Donnie brosco It's an old school movie. It's about um, you know if you seen it One time but I wasn't Johnny Depp Al Pacino Johnny Depp's an undercover cop that infiltrates one of the biggest crime families That's about the extent of all. Yeah, it's such a good movie undercover So I feel like you have this overwhelming confidence that you could like get into a character of a gang member. Oh for sure Oh for sure, even that was for sure. Oh 100% I could be a blood for sure 100% I could be I could be a crit 100% Now it now the I think the biggest thing you and crit back in the same room would cause like I know
- That's a natural disaster. - He said, (screams) - It's a scream. No, me and Kripp back would hit it off, 100%. - You think you and Kripp back would be friends? - Well, I'd probably distance myself a teach, but now to go under character, it's method acting. I have to lean into it. Okay, I gotta walk straight up to him, what up, Cuzz? - I said, forget about it, Cuzz. (laughs) (claps) - I'd have to, I have to lean in. - Okay, how long do you think you could be an undercover cop, like infiltrating a gang? - Oh God, do you think you could fully take down the gang before you get caught? - I think I could get to about second in charge. Now, if it's a family-oriented one, like Italian, Mahbos, and his brother's the right hand, his son's the next in line, that might be a little hard. - It might be hard. - Now if it's just the hey, conglomerate, we got people, all walks of life, we're all big gang, I could get to, I could at least get to board meetings. I could get to like a big, like a big wig in the game. - So let's take you to the proper term. - Let's take you to Mexico. - Okay. - How long are you getting in there? - Mexico's tricky, now, we have, we have any immediate, we have any immediate hold up. First is being language, and second, say their first thing is like, take a bump of that, I'd be like, mm, I'm a cop. - I'm a big, don't wanna do that, get other cop! And I'm probably in a room worn on 50, I probably lose. - So wait, that's probably looking down, like thanks a lot of pain. - That's how you would stop. Like that's where you would stop if they asked you to do some drugs, or like to watch them off somebody. That's where you'd be like, guys, my I don't have the stomach for this. - Yeah, I'm like, mm, I'm not feeling the best today, man. Anybody got a toilet? They go, shut up, gringo, and I go, oh, you're right. I would say I'd probably be more comfortable. I'd probably be more comfortable doing the drug than watching them off somebody. I'd probably have to. I'd be like, man, a bump, but you know what? Wow, I never thought this tape was gonna happen. Here goes nothing, stay in character. Not, oh, God, they'd be so smart. They'd be so smart to get me under the influence. I'd start babbling like a bitch. - You snitcher yourself. - Oh, my God. - You'd be like, I'd join the floor. - I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I'm similar to the guy, I'm like, bro, I've been lying to you for three years, bro. I'm from Dallas, bro, the, is it? Is it hot in here, anybody? Oh, dude, y'all are all going down. Oh, my God, two more years, you're all dead. I'm just sitting in the room, my, I'm so good. I've infiltrated your system. I found the supplier. Oh, y'all are so dumb. What till Sarge here's about this? What'd you say? - I'm done. - Oh, that's hilarious. - Yeah, the stuff. - Do you think? - Now, I would prefer an American gang. - Now, that's so sweet. - So, we drop y'all in South Central LA. - There we go. I can get down. - Really? - Which am I? - They would have you, it doesn't matter. It can't stop doing that. - Well, that's not even the real stuff. I'm just saying a B or a C. In my B or a C, very important. - Very important, dude, this is the most out of touch conversation I think we've ever had. - Everyone knows it comes down to the wardrobe. If I'm a B, can't be wearing, I can't be wearing, I think the gang rules have changed. I don't think it's that strict anymore. - Really? That's lame as f*****. Like, I've definitely seen Chris Brown wear blue. - That's true, but he's like, he's like a, he's like a, I think you know, he's like an ethereal. Like, he's past it. - No, he's not. - We know, no, we know his, we know what he gets down with, but he's also, how can he make his so much breach if he can't wear blue? If he was always in red, come on now. He's on stage with people. He's got to wear blue. I'm not going to have, rock, I would do good. I would do great. I don't think you sounded wider. (laughing) I would f***** rock in a gang, that's hilarious. - I'm not going to, I'm going to full blown take jail, like jail mentality. I'd walk straight up to the first, - Yeah. - Oh god, I'd have to. I'd be terrified. - Yeah. - I'd love to, bro, so I'm trying to get in. (laughing) - I'd steal his f***** and then I'd literally be like, yeah, this is my f*****, never had an affinity to do that. I've never really wanted to be in a gang. - I've never wanted to be in a gang. - I've wanted to be in a gang. (laughing) - Me, I'm like, how can I get this gang? You're like, how can I talk to him? - That's, now we understand the suburb white kid to fraternity pipeline. It's like, you wanted to be in a gang. - Oh! - There's no options for you in the suburbs. - No. - You're like, okay, now I'm in Purdue and I'm gonna do the elephant walk. - Oh, you pay for it. - Elephant walk. - You didn't know that's what they're doing? I don't want to put this on Purdue, but like a lot of fraternities, like your people, like the fraternities, they do the elephant walk to get in the fraternities. - No, I'm just saying, I don't know what the elephant walk is. What's an elephant walk? - The elephant walk. - Okay, if we had to, if you had to guess what the elephant walk initiation for fraternities is, what do you think it is? - No f***** elephant walk. - Yeah. They're like, all right, if the walk, everybody, all you, what's it called whenever you're a freshman? - No, it's like the people that are trying to-- - Oh, pledging, all you pledges, elephant walk, blindfolds, I'll give you that. - Blindfolded elephant walk. - It's gotta be something, elephants or creatures with insane endurance, I believe. - It's like, what else do they have? - Big f***** - Guess they got these dudes out here, but naked walking around with their trunks out. Blindfolded to where, where are they walking? How long are they walking? - Oh, okay, they're not walking alone. They're together. It's elephant walk. You grabbing the trunk behind you and you're walking around with it. First off, first off, God bless the guy in front of me. 'Cause like, he's so scared. They're in my trunk to grab, brother. He'd be like this, like right up on the pace. It wouldn't be, it wouldn't be too much away from the body, it'd be like this. He'd be like, I thought this was all male. - You go, you go, how'd she get in here? (screaming) - You're out of your mind, you are out of your mind. - In elephant walk. - I wouldn't elephant, I wouldn't elephant walk to save my mother. - Really? - Elephant walk. - How long do you think me and you could elephant walk? - I wouldn't elephant walk, the f*****. I'd do a marathon elephant walking with you. - I would do a two if there was no other human's, if it was just us blindfolded holding f*****. - Sure, I can get down with that. That's a little strange to say, but I can get down with that. Is this like a publicly viewed, do they have general admission to this? - What do you mean? - No, it's like, it's like. - So my where are they walking? Where are they walking? - In the basement, where are the fraternity dudes? - That's some clue clocks playing. - I'm not gonna lie, I'm not gonna lie. You grab 50 white dudes, all young, all eager, right? They wanna serve, and you grab 'em. What? - They wanna serve Alpha Fagal, but they wanna serve that. They wanna serve Alpha Fagal die. - Alpha data new. - Alpha data new to your elephant creep. You go, get butted, they get blindfolded, walk around it. That's f*****, which can't keep a 2500 to get in it? After your dad dropped 40 racks, you're doing witchcraft. - Yeah. - To then be naked with other men. Blindfolds in a basement. Which some people, that's your dream situation. - No, that's your dream, I don't know why. We don't have the same dream. - No, I'm just saying, like, that's insane. Like, that's what you're into, it's great. Like you just hit the jackpot. - Yeah, but do it for free, don't do it for 25 grand. - Right, I mean, there's dudes that pay a lot more to get the other way around, so it's like. - I did not, okay, I knew. - But it's confirmed, I watched a TikTok, and it was like, you know those like, street interviewers dudes, they're like, go up to like college kids on campuses. - Yes. - Like at their local like college bars, like on campus and stuff. And it was like a girl and a guy, and he was sitting down. And they were like, he has something about fraternities, the guy's in a fraternity. And I think the girl had just gotten broken up with from a fraternity dude. And is she like exposed at all? She was like, no, these are fraternity dudes or whatever they do, the elephant walk. And she's like, I put it on my soul right now. Whatever. And then the dude right there was like, this. And then the interviewer was like, what's an elephant walk? She described it. And then he asked the guy, he was like, he'll do that. And he goes, it's part of the culture. Bro, part of the culture is like, cooking ribs and like wearing the same polo on Game Day. Grabbing and walking blindfolded. - I'm not mad. You're not mad, you would elephant walk. - If everybody's consenting to elephant walk. - You a YSK elephant walk. - I was just about to say, we would have like the YSK Olympics elephant walking is one of them, is one of the games. - Disqualified. - Obviously with everybody consenting like wanting to do it. Yes, I'm gonna do it. - Yes, of course. - Like your job's not aligned. If you say no, you're not getting fired. - Okay, no. - You're fine, I'm just. - Did you rather care up in front of you or behind you? Oh my god. (clapping) - Yeah. - He's reffing. - No, he's not. Care up is in the elephant walk. He's behind your front. - He's on leave. He's on like a maternal leave or something. - No, no, no, no, no, he's here in the place. Is he behind you or in front of you? Oh my god, oh my god. This is what we're doing. Draft your YSK, your elephant walk. What is your, what is your perfect elephant walk? Your perfect elephant walk. - I don't wanna lead 'cause I want somebody feeling me. - I'm in the lead. - I'm in the lead. I'm either in the lead or I'm the caboose. 'Cause that way off-rip, I'm only doing one of the actions. I'm either being held or, oh my god. Does the caboose have to kill each of them? Does the caboose have to grab haunches? - What is, no, the caboose is getting held. - Yeah, he's free-handed. - I'm caboose. - Maybe he's blindfolded off. He's leading the pack from mine. - That'd be it. - He's like right. (clapping) - He's like, "I love my home, I love my home to join the army!" - That's crazy, babe. For turnings are crazy, brother.
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And Shopify powers millions of businesses worldwide from household names to small businesses just getting started. So you're up there with the big dogs as soon as you get started. I want you guys to launch before Black Friday, because it's a time of year when more people are already shopping and ready to buy. So launching before Black Friday means you could take advantage of that extra online traffic. That's just, they hand the business advice for me over there. OK, so if you're ready to launch your business before Black Friday, go to Shopify.com/YSK to start your free trial at Shopify.com/YSK. And you go to Shopify.com/YSK to hear your first. Ha! Now, on to the rest of this episode. You should know podcast. Speaking of elephants. Really? Yeah, speaking of elephants, it's actually crazy we brought this up. I think elephants are the most terrifying creatures of all time. OK. They're up there, but they're not all time. Elephants don't get to respect they deserve. I've been on the elephant train for a minute. I was about to say, you've been on an elephant? No, oh god, I would love to though. Yeah, that'd be an honor. No, be honest. Elephants are scarier than any animal you could imagine. Tiger, lion. Oh, shut up. You just started with the worst thing-- you just started with the worst thing you could have said. I don't think-- You know how I'm scared of clouds? Yes, which-- I'm more scared of elephants. Like elephants are more powerful than lightning. You, first off, what? I have elephant facts. More powerful than-- who says-- Like that, more powerful than lightning. If elephants decided to revolt right now, the world would be-- Elephants, I have more power than artificial intelligence right now. What do you think these elephants are? What do you think these are? They have aliens inside of them? I have never seen an elephant in person, so I never got to fully grasp the magnitude of these creatures. Right? They're big. Can't say they're big. Elephants are massive. Have you ever seen a Walmart? If-- I don't know, I want to stop you. If you're about to look at me in my eyes, as another grown man, and tell me that the elephants are sizes of Walmart, I will respectfully walk off the couch. If you're going to-- No, no, no, no, no. If you're going to tell me, there's an elephant, the size of a Walmart. I am genuinely questioning our friendship from here on out. An elephant standing up on its back to feet, like we're to stand up like a human, it could grab the top of a Walmart. OK. You understand that? Yes, that's a big-- That's a big-- No, no, that's unbelievable. Everybody go to a Walmart right now and look up. And imagine a 4,000 pound being like this over you. Are you crazy? That right there can take out 5,500 people. 15? First of all, I think you said 1,500. I mean, say 1,500 people. First of all, no, we can't. Just it standing up on a rate. First of all, elephants-- they are very dangerous. I'm not taking away. They're very smart. They're very dangerous. You get elephants on a stampede. I know you've seen Tarzan. I've known you've seen it. Tarzan, they whipped clean through a jungle. Yes. Terrifying. That is scary. Oh, elephants scaling up in-- Yes, what? We don't have elephants in Frisco. Why are you more afraid of elephants than anything else? I'm saying if they decide to revolt, the elephant is going to take over everything. And they're smarter than us. Can I give you more facts? You were-- imagine that. That's the first thing. An elephant is taller than a Walmart. No, it can grab a Walmart. It's taller than a Walmart. And I said, elephants are more scary than monkeys like gorillas and apes. Which-- they're more powerful. Do you know an elephant's trunk? Just it's snows. An elephant's snows. An elephant's nose weighs as much as an adult male gorilla. Yes. And their nose is as big as King Kong. No, don't you dare. Don't you dare. What is King Kong? You think King Kong's a regular monkey? You think King Kong's a regular ape? I'm just saying a gorilla. There you go. So, and everybody was talking about all gorillas versus black mombas. And everybody was-- Everybody's talking about how gorillas are the scariest thing in the world. Gorillas are terrifying. An elephant has a gorilla on its nose, brother. It smells out of gorilla. And that's fine. It's got a big nose. It's a big creature. It is a big creature, but it's only defensive. Elephants are defensive by nature. The elephant's not going to turn around and look at you and just want to absolutely mull you like a gorilla would. Or a tiger. The fact you said tiger. Yeah, you can. You can stomp. OK, so you're saying if the top of a wall are fell down, like if a wall are just fell down fully onto a tiger. What's going to happen to that tiger? The tiger's going to die. OK. So if a live moving elephant decides to go, right? And it just stomp you out. It's a Walmart stomping you out with a gorilla attached to it. Are you nuts, brother? But you're-- OK, that's the only thing you're saying. They can stomp you out. Do you understand? It's like move, move, camp, and then-- That's like a car coming at you. If that car hits you, it's going to be terrible. You move. Elephants are one of the fastest creatures in the jungle for its size per capita. Oh, no, per capita for its size per BMI amount percentage. Yeah, per capita. And imagine-- and that's just a regular-- that's standard elephant. That's standard elephant on a regular day. God forbid, you get an elephant. That's got horns in it. The tusks, yeah. Add here, that's a hippo. That's a hippo on literal TRT. That's a hippo on peptides. Yeah, he's a hippo of it. It's like Chris Mom said hippo. Elephants are scary, I give you that. But the problem is, why are you close enough to an elephant to where it can just fall on you? Why are you close enough to a tiger? I know. Are you scared of tigers? Absolutely. 'Cause same reason I'm scared elephants. That's a fair point. Thank you. All an elephant's going to do is crush you. An elephant's not going to chew you down. An elephant's going to stomp you out. It's going to hit you with its trunk, hit you with its tusks, and it's going to crush you. Camp. Camp. A gorilla can dismember you. A tiger is the real king of the jungle, by the way. They're not a lion. Tigers, the king of the jungle. And the elephant is the king of the jungle. Tot. Bro. A tiger. Who are the elephants? And the gorilla is afraid of, in Tarzan. Stop talking about Tarzan. It's a great, at this point it's documentary. Elephants can kill 15 tigers on one time if they wanted to. Are you, what, fairy land are you in, right? It has a gorilla attached to its face. It's a nose. It's a nose. It's not an actual gorilla going. So if I had to, so if I, if this weighed as much as a gorilla right now, would you be scared of it? Yeah. Would you be able to swing it as fast as you could? No. Would it be a lot longer? Yes. If I was a size of a Walmart, where are you going? Hips. I'm running away from you. With those hips? I'm running. Yes. Right. I'm confidently out running you and an elephant. You're tripping. I would out run an elephant. Easily. I would out maneuver an elephant that's so big. Your lateral movement is piss poor. There's a, do you think you can out maneuver a car on foot? What kind of car? You pick. Let's pick a big truck. No. I can't. In a neighborhood with tight turns, everything like that. No. As a human. Small. No. No faith in yourself. I, if someone, if you were, that's like you think you can outrun a car, Kim. You can't outrun a car. See? That's why your mind's feeble. It's not out running it. It's out maneuvering. If I go in a straight line, you and your cybertruck, you catch me. Elephant catches me. Yes. The second you take off, I immediately stop, hit a hard left. And then as soon as you go to hit left, yeah, guess what? Now I'm going right. Yeah. I'm on you. You're still going like that. I'm taking 90s, 90s. Kim, you can't move that fast. You can't take a right that fast. No, the car can't. Yes, it can. And the elephant can't. I can, I can do that. Regardless. Stop. Boom. Cars can't go. Okay. There are why whenever people take off on foot in police chases, why do they always get caught by the car? Like, what are you talking about? The cops get out with them and chase them down foot. No, they, because the car catches them. Yeah, because that's multiple cars and they're out maneuvering the person. I'm saying a one-on-one scenario. I know, brother. One-on-one scenario. I'm just saying elephants are the craziest creatures of all time. They are the king of the jungle. They are not the king of the jungle. They are crazy. But for you to think they're the king, and you said the scariest part, no, time out, time out. What the fuck was the lightning fact? You said they're more powerful than lightning. Because there's a higher likelihood that you could get killed by an elephant rather than lightning. And it's more powerful. It is. Peyton. It's the same thing if a tree falls on the forest, do you hear it? That's not what it is. It's the same thing. If a tree falls on the forest, it doesn't make a sound. And the answer is yes. It's not the same. If a tree falls with no one there to hear it, did it make a sound? Is the same. If a tree falls in the forest, did you hear it?
That's not the saying. The moral dilemma to get the cogs moving is if a tree falls and no one's there to hear it. That's what I'm saying. That's the same thing. That's the saying. You're adding something. Comment the question, okay, what's your moral, what's your question in yours? What are you talking about? I told you the question. If a tree falls on the forest, do you hear it? That's as simple as, am I in the forest? No. Then no you don't. Did I ask you the question on the forest face? Then no you don't hear it. The dilemma is. That's the dilemma. Did the tree fall though? Yes, the tree fell. How do you know? You're not in the forest. Pain, this is like some, this is some Jerry raked version of the real question. It's if a tree falls in a forest and no one's there to hear it, did it make a sound? Because it's cool. You just had a whole thesis statement. No one's ever said it that long. I said four extra words. If a tree falls and no one's there, does it make a sound? I feel like you've changed your question three times. It's said it was too long so I shortened it. So which one is it? Mine's never changed. If a tree falls on the forest, did you hear it? That's stupid. That is stupid. That is stupid. That's dumb. I'm not understanding how this is dumb. If a car crash, did you hear it? If your mom made my way, if your mom made my way popcorn, did you hear it? Can you brother fell out of his bed? Did you hear it? You're just saying something. There's no thought process. What are you saying? The general thought is really hard on the basketball court. Did you hear it? Were you asking me? That was thank you. You're right. I'm saying. Oh my God. Pain, you're just asking a question with zero dilemma. The whole point of these is there's a dilemma. The dilemma for the real question is. Did you hear it? Oh my God. Oh my God. The same question is being asked. No, it's not. Okay. I'm cheekily, I'm actually starting to get anxious because I'm not understanding what's going on. No, I know. Trust me. I know you're not understanding. I know. That was never up for the bit. Okay. If a tree falls, then shut up. What is the question? Not the whole thing. What are you trying to figure out? Did you hear it? Did you hear it? Right. Okay. In mine, you're trying to figure out, did it make a noise? Okay. Nothing. No, it's not. There's noises going on all outside right now. You don't hear them. So they're not the same thing. Exactly. No, I do hear them. I do hear it. If you're going to ask me something that's going on right now outside, I heard it. Okay. What Olivia just said in my house. She's not right here. She's not down-town Dallas. That's the dilemma. If you weren't in the forest, in a tree fell, you'd hear it. Exactly. But did I ask you in the forest? No. I'm asking you. In our studio. Right now. Oh my God. Oh my God. But you explain yours. Because I'm not understanding it. Yeah. I know. Oh my God. Stop saying that over and over again. Just get to it. The dilemma is if no one's there to hear it is a sound still made. That's the whole point. Because they're asking is- That's a totally different question than- I know, but that's- That's the real one. Because the dilemma is sound is only something that is interpreted. Like if there was no humans on earth, is there still sounds? That's like believing in God though. What? What are you saying? Get believe. Now you have faith in your- Three question? God. I love the Lord. No. No, you made it philosophical. My- Oh! My it's practical. Touch the point. But that's the point. Yes. It is to think. I mean, I want you to know your last two seconds, you let me say no. Yes. Like that's how confused you are. You went no. Yes. No. The question is, if the tree fell in the forest, could you hear it? Right? Now. And now if you're close enough to- Shut up. If you're close enough to the forest. Yes. I'm far away. If a car beeps outside right now, could you hear it? Yes. Yeah. If you ask me that in home, no. That's the point of the question. It's all about, can you hear things that are near you? It's the same thing. You're just being philosophical about it. That is so not the same thing. Can you hear things that are near you? Yes. Why would I be able to? You have a hundred percent success rate with that question. Hey. Can you hear this? Well, the pinch. What are you asking me? Well, if I'm asking you what I'm doing with this, I'm always going to be next. You can hear it. Yes. Exactly. There's no dilemma. There's no dilemma on yours, either. There's no conversation. The dilemma in mind, if you listen, people are saying sound is something that is interpreted by us. Yes. Fire ears. Like if we get like to someone that is deaf. This isn't insensitive. But to someone that's deaf. They can feel it. They can't hear anything. They can feel it. Okay. You're about to make this weird. I've seen somebody had a concert put their hand on the speaker and they were like rocking. Okay. There you go. But let's say they're not. Regular conversation. They're talking. Someone's talking to them. Right. Okay. They can't hear it. Right. But that sound is happening. To them, it's not. Okay. So the dilemma. If a tree falls in the forest, but nobody is there, did it make a sound? Am I deaf? No. I'm about to be naked. I'm about to strip. Why do you bring up the deaf person if I'm not deaf? Oh my God. Oh my God. I'm about to strip my clothes. I think you're gripping into it. You're going to be wildly surprised to comment to this. You're not making sense. Shit. You're. I might. I might do something. If these comments don't. Peyton. Okay. But don't talk so much. Your question. Don't use that. Don't use deaf. Don't use deaf people. Okay. No deaf people in quick straight to it. If a tree falls, does it make a sound? Yes. Okay. Did you hear it? I'm going to ask for 10 seconds. 10 seconds. No one's there. 10 seconds. No one's options. Would you say yes? Yes. I always want to listen to him. Would you say? I hate you. I absolutely hate you. Yes. More times than not. Yes. Sure. Right? Depends on what it lands on, but yeah. There you go. Now, if no one's there, do we still think it makes a sound? We did. Well, no. Because you don't know if the tree fell. Yes, you do. I'm telling you, the tree. How do you know if no one was there? Because that's the dilemma. The dilemma is you're lying. You don't know if the tree fell. You just said no one's there. That's the dilemma. That's the dilemma. No, it's not a dilemma. You're making something up. Say we have a. The tree didn't fall. We don't know if the tree fell. Does your pee brain really need a reason to make the tree fall right now? You can't just go with the flow. I have a silent firecracker planted in the root system of the tree. It explodes completely silent. It doesn't make a single sound, but it completely decapitates the tree and the tree is falling. So, yes, the tree fell. And it has a trigger radius of a billion miles. So, I can click the button for my house and it's guaranteed to work and it's 100%. And it's foolproof. So, the tree is gonna fall. But no one else is there. Is that better? How do you know if the dynamite didn't make a sound? But you know. Because it's 100% silent. Every factory ever created. It's 100% silent. But you don't know because you weren't there. You can't prove that the tree fell. It could have been a faulted. That's the whole principle of this. It's not about sound. It's about the tree falling. If you said no one was there, then you don't know the tree fell. Oh my God. Oh my God. So, what is your question? Say it again. I'm not in a forest. So, you don't know. Yeah, I'm not in a forest. There you go. How do you know the tree fell? Am I in the forest? Yeah. Then I saw it. So, did it make a sound? I heard it. Yeah. Conversations done. Thank you. That was a good one. What is that? What is that? I don't know, man. Oh my God. I am profusely wet. That is insane. Oh my God. I think I body that. I don't think you do that. I think I body that. I think I proved. I don't think you were going to be. Like, almost horrifically mistaken. When you read these comments. I proved my point and debunked your point. And that's because you are a serpent with the tongue. There is no point. I think you keep saying that because you want to. Why do you keep saying that about me? Why do you keep saying I'm a serpent with my tongue? Because your tongue slithers. You like my tongue. I don't mind your tongue. It's a big, it's a thick tongue. Do you like me? It's a thick tongue. You're decent. Good to look at. I can only imagine other things, but you're good to look at. Really? What are we doing? What do you mean can you imagine? What are you doing right now? You couldn't keep up with me sexually. You couldn't. If you gave me one night of your body. I mean, you would literally. You would just be. Okay, I'm not packing down from a challenge. You would be grossly under. You would be. You would be. Impressed. I'll say that. Because you think so little of me. You think, oh, why do my hips hurt so bad? Because they're wide. No, you know what I feel about you. If you try. So say we gave each other a fun night. Me and you were like, let's. Right. We mean you had a good night of like, let's. Let's. Let's explore. Me and your Christopher Columbus. We're exploring each other's bodies. Right. Okay. I don't think you could start me up. Like, like, oh, God. Like, you couldn't. You couldn't get me in the mood. Oh, you're pride. Sick. No, it's not pride. It's. - It's you.
I would blindfold you and I'd go straight behind that ear. See, that's the thing, and I'd start licking. See, that's the thing, that's the thing. You would try to get me going, like, actually trying to do sexual things to me. The only way you could-- What the whine and dine at first? Yeah. Oh, God. The only way you could get my draws off is you have to laugh my panties off. Like, you would have to make me laugh. And I'd argue there's no one in this world that's made you laugh more than me. 100%, but that's-- So you-- Draws are dropping. But I'm saying, but you wouldn't take that approach. You would try to just be-- You would blindfold me, you'd tie me up, and it just wouldn't-- I wouldn't like it. Like, I would be like-- You would eventually-- You would put chocolate on my nipples. Like, I don't want that. Like, you know what I mean? Like, that's not what I mean. You wouldn't take the time to figure out what I want. OK, if I could get the sense-- If I was staring at the hog, and it wasn't barking, right? And then I'd get the sense, all right, I'd skip the step. I would backtrack and put your clothes back on. But you'd be tied up with my clothes on? No. I mean, it was so-- It's weird. You Joe Goldberg's getting this glass box. Like, Kim, this is turning me on. I'm scared. I don't-- see, that's the thing. I never said tie you up. I said, blindfold. Like, it's been like $1,500 at the Adam and Eve. And like, try to get all this thing. Like, you'd get ice, and like, it like fruit loops draws, and have me guess which color is all my painting. Oh, I'd eat your underwear, clean off you. I would. I'd absolutely would. If it would fruit-- We have like a better hope, eh? No! You should know podcasts. You should know podcasts is brought to you by Mod. Mod prescribes a once or twice daily medicinal drink that can keep you energized, focused, and alert throughout your entire day. Here's how the mechanism works. Energy drinks that you drink has caffeine that temporarily blocks your adenosine, the chemical that makes you tired. But then it builds up, and when that caffeine wears off, you're crash. You're going to crash, you don't feel good. You already know exactly what I'm talking about. But with medicinal, that whole process works completely different. It engages multiple pathways into your brain, dopamine, norepinephrine, histamine, and aroxen to achieve steady energy and alertness for up to 10 to 12 hours. Good Lord. That sounds like your whole day. And the coolest part about Mod is it is trusted by some of the sickest professions out there. You've got your soldiers, your pilots, and even astronauts up in the space station use Modiphanil in high-stake situations where full concentration is required. So if you're tired of the temporary fix and that hard crash that you all know and hate, visit mod.com, that's m-o-d.com for a free consultation and get 10% off your first order plus free shipping with promo code YSK, that is promo code
[email protected]. Please see their website for important safety information and we thank you mod for sponsoring the pod now on to the rest of the episode. - You should know pod caps. - This episode is brought to you by Quo. Halloween's supposed to be scary. Sure, fine. But, you know what's actually terrifying? Your business ghosting its own customers. Oh god, it gives you a spook right down the spine. Nobody picks up, nobody calls back. And honestly, if you want me to just keep a buck, that's losing money. That is absolute losing money and customers. That's why today's episode is brought to you by Quo. Spelled Q, U, O, the business phone system built so you never miss a call. Quo is the number one rated business phone system on G2 trusted by over 90,000 businesses who rely on it to stay reachable and to look professional every single day. All of your calls, all of your text, all of your voicemails, they live in one place. Oh, I come down through a little head call. I'm sick, I'm out of office. Someone else has got my back. Ooh, someone had some bad chili for lunch. They gotta go to the pot and they're pooping for 10 minutes. I got their back. It's all in the same spot. We're not leaving any money on the table. We're not leaving any customers, untalked to and we're gonna get the deal done with Quo. Money is on the line. Always say hello with Quo. Try Quo for free, plus 20% off your first six months when you go to Quo.com/YSK. That is Q, U, O, dot com slash YSK. Thank you, Quo. Now on to the rest of the episode. - You should know podcast. - All right, quick little black. (laughing) - Wait. Wait. What? - I meant to say blast to the past. - And you started a quick little black. - That's how we get off an ad break. - I meant to say blast to the black guy here. - Quick little black thought. I got a quick little black thought in my mind raising around. No, I meant quick black. What's going on, man? Quick black, quick black head count. How many we have in here? For I get uncomfortable. How many blacks, right? Regina, count the blacks. Blast from the past. I don't know why I blast, blah, blah. I think that's my mind. I don't know. - Yeah, I don't know how you can blast from the past. I have a would you rather for us today? - Remind me how would you rather? Now it might get tricky for you. - Okay. - Okay. - It might get tricky for you. Would you rather receive $10 million cash right now on taxed? - Oh my God. - But your partner is allowed to sleep with one person of their choice. - How many times she needs? (laughing) I'll watch. I got a nice comfortable chair in the corner. (laughing) - Or stay loyal to each other. - Oh, there's more in my path. - Sorry, sir. - That's why I laugh. - Or stay loyal to each other forever. - But you can never make more than $50,000 a year for the rest of your life. - No, why are you crazy? - Nothing wrong with making $50,000. - Okay, so, so, sir, I have to sleep with somebody. Sir, I have to sleep with someone. - Go away. - And you're gonna watch. My full sport. (laughing) - Full sport. - Hey, I'll recommend. Well, you wanna go on the export page together? - Me looks great. - You're out of your mind. - At any time where I'm gonna be like, "Look at that, how I'm gonna meet." (laughing) You go, you sure you don't wanna? - No, he really could use that $10 million. - Wait, you wouldn't? - No, bro. - Why? - No, you? - No. - You asked me to touch live a lot. - No, I say to hug. I say give her a hug, she's feeling down. - No, you also go do, feel it back for neck. - Oh, it's a soft back to the neck, you know what it is. But no, I wouldn't. - Really? - I couldn't do that as much as I'll joke that I'm like, - You are. - No, no, no, no, no. I like my $10 million friends to hug. - In it would be close. - It's one time. - Ten million? - Yes, one time though. - Well, you just get a guy that you know is gonna be quick and get him out of there. - First off, it's her choice. 'Cause of course, it's always her choice. - Yeah, open it up to, no, I mean, it quite literally is in the question with, that opens up to the pain. One of she picks, okay, how do you feel if she picks the complete opposite of who you are as a man? - I wouldn't blame her. - The complete opposite. - That's 'cause she, for her one free pass that, oh, this is such a good thing for our family, we get $10 million. - I'm confident, man. - I'm gonna pick someone stronger, darker, bigger, bigger. - What's the problem with that? - You're like, what the fuck? - So you would prefer a guy to look exactly like you? - No, but at least. - Then what do you want? - Uglier than me. I want your one body for the 10 million to be a grenade. I want your one body to be the nastiest body. - I don't. - I don't care. - I don't, I mean, I really don't need it, but I'm not doing it. I'm not gonna make more of that. - I'm like, I'm fine with it. Like, I literally would never think about it again. - I wouldn't. - See, that's insane. - Or I could use it, I gotta get you a bit. Remember, you did that. - No, you can't. - Because that's like what's making the 10 million. - No, I'm just kidding. I wouldn't. I really wouldn't care. I think I'm just more progressive than most. - See, I don't. - And I'm getting some out of it. Like, if you're just doing it and my whole 18 to 24, I was doing that for, like, I was, my girlfriends were cheating on me for free. Mine was gonna get 10 mil out of it. - I mean, that's fair, but I guess for me, neither one of us have ever cheated. We're married. I don't like it. - That you know of. I hate to put that on you. - And I don't think she would. I know she wouldn't. - Oh, I don't know. - Well, which is it? I think like the statistic for cheating relationships like 80% of relationships are cheating. - Okay, that's fine. You think lives cheated on me? - I don't. I know. I'm taking it outside of you. You are just the person I'm talking to. - Oh, okay, okay. - I think the statistic show that 80% of, actually, let me, before I just spew out statistics, let me actually look that up. - 80? - That is, God, we suck. - What is the percentage of marriages that have infidelity? - That's a good word I just used. - Oh, it's way lower than I thought. - Okay, I was about to say 80's, that's four out of five. - Oh, it's, I mean, this is a lie, too. It's 25%. - Yeah, one out of four I can see. That's still, that's way too many. Like, why not think about four married couples? Like, your parents, my parents, me and Liv, and who else? Do you hear that? Something's under there. - No. - Hey, Louie, all right. There's like a, some, I'm not gonna go poke around and find out either. I'm not either. - Speaking of the wrong Caucasian. - Speaking of it. - Dude, let's explore it. - CJ, he's editing this. You know, we've had a rat prom back in the back of my house. He's been eating them. - The You Should Know podcast. - This episode is brought to you by us. The You Should Know podcast in our Patreon. If you want more access to the You Should Know podcast and one episode a week is not getting it done, join one of the three tiers over on patreon.com/You Should Know podcast camp. Tell 'em what they can get. Oh, you get all sorts of things over at the Koala Club every single week. Every Monday, you get a 10 minute talk. Oh, that's whenever you get a little deep dive into more serious conversations every single Monday, only for 10 minutes. Good morning to you. Every single Wednesday, you get a Patreon exclusive episode. That's another fool link that episode, but not just with me and Cam. [BLANK_AUDIO]
a whole YSK crew and interchanging guests and that is every single Wednesday. - And every single month, depending on your tier, you get one of our other existing shows. That could be Dr. P. - I'm not gonna lie, that's my personal favorite. That is my absolute diehard favorite. - Our conspiracy theory show. - Ooh, I'm out of IT, that might be my personal favorite. Fantastic, and it's highly, highly loved by all of you. - And a lot of you, I love our new YouTube channel, YSK Unplugged, but if you want every video that is uploaded on our YouTube channel, one week early, completely ad-free and uncensored, it is available to our Koala Prime and our Koala Royalty members. Speaking of Koala Royalty members, y'all get another two things every single month, which is another full-linked podcast episode, which is completely unhinged. And the things we say on the Koala Royalty, you cannot hear anywhere else. - Oh no, yeah, it's bad. They're gonna live on royalty and royalty only. - And you get a Koala Royalty live stream once a month with the whole YSK crew, and that's an hour of going live, just with the Koala Royalty members, and that is the closest we can ever get to a FaceTime call with you. - So join the Patreon right now, pick one of the three tiers, so you can get whatever kind of content you like. Click the link in the description or just go to patreon.com/yushanopodcast. We'll see you over on the Patreon. - Bye, Koalas. (clears throat) - But you should know podcast. - No, he's been trying to befriend them. - Oh, okay. Oh, see you. See, I hate to put you on blinds. He told me this yesterday in confidence, but he knows my job. He knows why I am, I'm gonna tell it. He goes on walks, our neighbor is big, so he goes on walks around the neighbor, and he knows the routes of the rats he sees. He'll be like, "Oh, that's where that rat is. He burrows here, and he comes out here." And so we have rats on our back. - He knows the routes of the rats. - Yeah, he routes the rats. He's a route router. - He's a rat router. - And so I've been noticing that the carrots have been missing in the fridge. I'm like, "I don't, I don't eat these carrots. Sarah doesn't eat these carrots. I thought, like, who's eating these carrots?" CJ doesn't eat. So I'm like, "Who's eating these carrots?" You know, CJ told me that he's been testing to see what food the rats like, because he wants to build a good relationship with them, is what he said. - What the fuck is that mean, CJ? What does that mean? You wanna build a good relationship with the rats? - That's what I said. - He's turning, he's turning, like, like, grew minions. - Yeah. - He's gonna turn, like, a rat army. - Yeah. Like, I'm scared to go up there in that room. What have you just got rats, like, in the pages? - No, it's just, genuinely. What if you opened that door one day? Like, you needed something, like, a question about something. - Yeah. - And you opened it and there was 20 rats in his room, but they were, like, freely moving around, like, super happy. - All right, call the police. - CJ was in his bed. And once we went, like, right across his chest, the other one's scaling the wall. - We get demonetized from my real answer, two more rats over there, they're like this. Like, he's like training, they're playing, like, rock paper scissors. - I promise you, I'd never see him in person again. He would never see my human existence. He would look at me through YouTube. That's it. That's the only way he would see me. - No, FaceTime? No, not a Zoom call? - He wouldn't think I still exist. I would, he would be so exiled from my life. (laughing) It is unbelievable. - What would you do if your wife? What would you do if your wife, all of a sudden, you said, babe, I really want to be happy. I want more companionship. The only way we could do that is I want to have some pet rats. You're a loving husband. What do you do? - I'm a very loving husband. Oh, yeah, let's let this, let's let this make it a little more real. - That's big. That's so much bigger than I thought. Oh my God, no, there's no way. And now I know she's not gonna get the hell rats, the ball black with her red eyes. But this is, look at this. This is one, oh that tail. This is one. - Yeah. - What would you do? What would you say? But she's like, babe, my genuinely, my happiness, like she'll start crying, like, what would you do? - First off, I'd be like, we're gonna get Jen somewhere. We're gonna, what's going on? - No, but regardless of getting her in somewhere, we find out we're after-- - Yeah, she just genuinely is in love with rats. She's always, I mean, but she doesn't want to cage because she cares about the lovely. - Oh, no, no, you gotta be f---ed up. No, I don't care. I don't care. You can be happy somewhere else. I don't care. No, dude, like, see that's a thing. Like, and I'm glad you brought that up because I said this earlier before this was even said, a marriage is about what? - Compromise. - So you want the rats, we can get the rats. I'm getting-- - So you would get the rats? - I'm getting a vibranium cage, and they're never out. - So you could, if that rat touches my son, I literally, I mean, that made a very good notice. - I'm hitting right over the fence. - Okay, so you would get the rats. - I would get, no, no, no, well, what is rats? This is, well, how many? - Six to eight. - Six to eight? - Six to eight rats. - The basketball team, she's getting two. - No, she's getting six to eight because-- - You eat two, come on. - She buys a family. - The compromises, they don't run free. - No, two, no, no. - Okay, what if she goes, I want six to eight, they can stay in the cage, but if you get two, they gotta run around free. - I go, you can get two in a cage. I go, final answer. Take you to leave it, deal with no deal. What's behind that case? Deal with no deal. You get two, and they can be boy and girl. They can mate, whatever they make, they can keep two. They're never sniffing fresh air. They never sniffed too. - Oh, no, they don't. - Do you find out in the cage? - You find out she's been letting them out when you're at work. - Oh, dude. - You come home, Malachi has one on his shoulder. - No, it's gone. - The rats, the rats are gone. That rat's so gone. - What's your thing with the rats, brother, fine? Michael Jackson had pet rats? - Oh, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, why that's me? She go right me, like a motorcycle. Got me a big Michael. - No, there's no shot. Michael, Michael, there's no shot. You have rats moving freely in my house. There's no shot. - You're insane, bro. - I honestly feel like you don't give live enough support. - You should, and Siles, CJ from, from your existence. - I don't love CJ. (laughing) - That's insane to say, he's ending this. You love CJ. - Yeah, differently. I do love CJ, obviously. I love him differently. - Oh, I love my wife. - I don't, I don't sexually please CJ anymore. - That's well, okay. - I do that with live, but soon you start talking about rats free in my house. No, that, oh, that desire, oh, that desire's tank. - You wouldn't divorce live. - No, I wouldn't divorce it, but you're not getting no tigers. You, you have rats. - You would need the tigers after a while. - You have, I mean, after a while, I'll have to. I mean, I'm a man. But there's rats running around my house. I'm not, I don't wanna have you. I'm sorry, that's crazy. - If you have pet, that's like having a pet like. - There's people watching us right now with pet rats. Even the comments put you on a pet rat. - Respectfully, I went to a fans house that is a pet rat. I dropped off some merch. - Like, why is a, can we break that down? Why is a rat a pet? People think of their cute. See, they're the same as hamsters. - No, oh, no, god no. - You say horror. - No, they are not. - They're both rotis. - Hamsters are cute. And I've seen them drive in like, gerbals in the wheels. - Right, and I've seen them get a fiat. - Yeah, exactly, those are cute. - Yeah. - A rat, a rat screams uncleanliness, sewage, disgustment. - This is borderline, like the Pixar should make a movie about this 'cause it has a little silhouette of racism. - It does it, it's not supposed to, but a mouse. 'Cause a mouse and rat are like the same thing, but the mouse is the tiny, petite, chute, little whiskers. - Oh, you're fat phobic. - Nothing to do with fat phobic. It's just, first, okay, this is all personal preference. That also sounds like racism, but it's like, I don't have a problem with them. They just kidn't go to the same church as me. - I don't want that, I don't hang out with them. - But it's the same as spiders. I don't like, I don't get people that have spiders as pets. And that's, that floats some people's boat. I would never have it. - Yeah, people think pets are very simple. You got your dogs, got your cat, maybe even fish. I don't even like fish really, to be honest. People that get pet fish, they're like killing fish. - Yeah, they got their predators. - They got killing tendencies. They're like, oh, wake up and see some death. - Dude, is that, is that a fact? Like, that might be the, like, just the most streamlined. Like, it can't be proven by science, but it's a, if you have fish, you're a killer. - Unless you're rich, you get good fish, like, you get those, like, rainbow fish. - In the wall tank with fluorescence, yeah. - Yeah, you got Dorian. - Yeah. - But you get in low, like, goldfish. - That's just booku, that's just booku. - If you're above the age of six, you have a goldfish, like, we need to, like, we need to check on you. - There's so many in your locker at the school. And that's just, and that's just how it is. Now, what's in that locker? That's up for interpretation. I'm just being honest, you don't need, you can't talk to the fish, the fish doesn't do tricks, the fish doesn't, you can't play fetch with the fish. - I've seen some, I've seen some, also, I think people that get birds are weird. - Oh, and now that CJ wants a bird, he's obsessed with birds. - You need to get CJ, like, a staff in a robe and just let him be a wizard on his own time. He's over here trying to be, radical-gast, and get with all the pets in the animal. He, like, wants a bird, like, he keeps talking about for years. - Like, people that get birds are weird. - Oh, dude, I almost lashed out. - Oh, my God, oh, my God, I almost lashed out. - People that get birds are weird. People that get fish are weird. What's another weird? - I mean, hamsters are toe in the line, 'cause hamsters are chewed enough. - It's the same thing as getting a rat. It's not, they're both broken. - Right, you put a, yes, they are, but you put a wheel and a cute little nipple to suck water from for a rat. Rat's gonna tear, right? - No, they'll do it, they'll get on the ropes. And the hamster is gonna get his exercise in, on his little treadmill, he's gonna pop off, wipe his sweat off, quick little nipples. - Rat's do the same thing. - People that get snakes are weird. - Oh, you get a snake, I'm never saying that out of your house. - Yeah. - Oh, you know what I mean? Seriously, like, in the most loving way, when I say I'd absolutely end your life, if I stay the night at your house, and you're snake, and I wake up and you're snake's on me, if I wake up, and there's a gullipithe on, sitting on, you will go with my snake on you. - Different snake. If I wake up and there's a python sitting on my chest as some form of prank. - No. - I've been prisoned. I've told many people in my life that a weird pet. It's like, my aunt Moll, she had a snake. - See, snakes, yeah, that like, they didn't switch that. - And its skin would be all over the apartment. - Like, yeah, I do want a snake. - For me, okay. - Nearing to some weird, like, yeah, weird cards, I will tell you about your few things. - Yeah!
- You got some dice. - That's where you're voodoo, witchcraft. 100%, you get a dog, 'cause it snuggles with you. It's fun, you scratch it, you can see it be happy. It lights up, cats, same thing, just way. Cats and introverts, extraverts for most part, cats and introverts. You don't get us, what do you get a snake for? - A snake, it's like, you definitely got a BDSM room. If you got a snake, you got a red room. - Let there everything. - Oh my God. - You have one of everything in black leather. - Oh, you like to put your fingers, which places I don't want fingers. - Oh my God, dude, yeah, it's nasty. A big octopus, tentacle with a little succumbent of the box. - It's like, oh, I don't want ice there. - Yeah, either ice, so much cool lip. - Yeah. - Okay, snakes, rats, birds, birds are creepy. Fish, fish just give, check out. - Fish are usually lazy. - Fish just need, you want lazy hangership, but you can't take on the responsibility. - Oh, 100%. You want to be able to just dump food and walk away. And then you come back, the water's green, they're dead floating up, it's been a week, and you just notice. - Mom's friend Allison had a ferret, would run around everywhere. - Hot take, I'd rather have a ferret than a rat. - No, you don't. - Yes, I would. - Ferret, no, you know you don't. - A ferret. - They stink. - Okay, well the stench, I can get it. Oh God, have you smelled Ruby after 10 minutes outside? - Yeah, dude, she's smelling like-- - She run from the inside out, okay? - She smells like something's boiling inside her. - I think she might be allergic to her food. Have you tried? Have you tested that? - Oh, that food's actually prescription. It was from the doctor, they tested her in the office, and we had three choices, and we went with that brand. I have to actually, I physically have to show up prescription card from my dog food, every time I buy it for, and her treats, and I'm not kidding. I literally have three prescription cards for my nine-pound chauini. Like think about it, if someone picks that bag of food up, and they take it to the checkout, and they can't leave the store until you show up prescription card. It's a serious food. She's on the no fat diet. Too much fat and oils. - Every day's a blessing. - Upsets are pancreas. - Every day she wakes up as a blessing. - It is, and she's cute. She's a cute dog, she's great. - You know how many times I, whenever I was over there at your house, I heard, where's Ruby? - Oh, Ruby. - Oh, Ruby, yeah, she, Ruby. - We like Ruby, where's Ruby? - Because the new rule, when humans eat, she goes up in the bathroom. - Yeah, I know. - She goes up, she's a prisoner, when humans eat. - Yes, no, the party was kind of like a two and a half hours just munchy munch. It was eat, it was eat, everybody was eating at different times. - She has eats some too. - Yeah, she already ate in the morning. She has breakfast and dinner. She doesn't get lunch. She's breakfast and dinner. - Did you feed that prescription, too? - If you feed your dog three times a day, I feel like if your dog's a self-sufficient on eating, it's your fault. It's an owner's fault. Like Malcolm, we left a bowl out all day and he would just eat like once or twice when he wanted. - You can do that more with bigger breeds. Because the only, not-- - Like, he does it, too. - Gin, he's a little medium breed, whatever. - Gin, he's like, he has a weird problem. - Was he like food? - Yeah, he likes eats and he doesn't digest it. Like he eats and as soon as he's done, he has to go outside and eat. - Ruby does that, too. - No, no. No, it's, Ruby's blood. - No, she has pancreatitis. I'm like, when it's normal, it's a good, it's still a little liquid. - It's an hour 15. - All right, guys, thank you for coming back to another episode of Use an O-Podcast scam. Get us out of here. - Appreciate you all. We absolutely love you episode 2.39, a wicked one. But if you want to see more wicked stuff, like TMTs and patron exclusives and live streams, Dr. P's and conspiracies and unplugs and everything in between. Hit that top link in the description. That is our Patreon. Go. Come a member of the Koala Club, join the amazing family, the amazing community, and see all the extra stuff that drops literally every single week. But you know where to find that. That's that link in the description. Go join the Patreon. Confuse the casuals. Get your good karma with this week's Secret Code. - What is it? - I meant to do like a double, like a double homophone. I wanted to say ear for elephants are scary, but then I quickly realized that scary starts with an S and not an R. - Yes. - So elephants are ridiculous. Elephants are, elephants are Walmart. EAW. - Elephants are Walmart. Oh, guys, by the way, if you're watching this on Monday, you will see me at Monday Night Raw. Right? I believe so. Yes. - This comes out the. - Yeah. - Yeah, in the 19th, yes. So you'll see me at Monday, right? Night Raw, San Diego. I'll be front and center for it. - Brrr. Brrr. - We absolutely love y'all. Remember one of the two. More Nashville trips and ship from this weekend stories are going to be on the Patreon exclusive with K-Rob in Dario. I will see you the Monday to vloggers. I'll make it on my Christmas and we'll see you next time. But yeah, I have to piss so bad I might throw up. Oh, he's starting to stink.
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