The Spiritual Cure for Anxiety, Control, Overthinking & Relationships with Rabbi Joey Rosenfeld.

(dramatic music) - We have the pleasure of having Rabbi Joey Rosenfeld, the good friend of mine, mentor, I can't say, "Habruta, cross the board." Back, back again, Rabbi, it's the third time you hear, "Hazaka?" - I think it's more than three already. - Very fourth, it's always a pleasure to have you on the podcast, this class, "The Sponsor Looney," "Runashmai Yachmai Di'an, Bagnalli Show." And for the success of "Gadi El Shep, Ahmed," and Reina Marco de Tobabasha, we merit to receive the tour of Brenul. Rabbi, thank you for coming on the podcast. We're here on a Sunday morning recording in the week of Mauchos, and we're gonna talk about receiving. - Yeah, look, during the week of Mauchos, there's nothing better to talk about. The week becoming a vessel. - Yeah, so we'll talk about how to practically become a vessel. I always have to bring your tours down to Earth, you're always in clouds. - No, come. I'm coming down, Earth's a song. - Jesus. - Earth's a song has a way of grounding a person. - Amen, amen. So Rabbi, what are you working on? Give us some of the things you're learning. We don't really learn the ball. - Learning. - I'm learning a lot of Bala Sulam. - Or you're talking about the Bala Sulam. I'm incredible. It's such a different language. - It's a different language, which is a language that we have the responsibility of translating now. - Yeah. - Bala Sulam's light was too bright to be fully incorporated at the time that it came down. 'Cause he was really giving us what the Arizal was saying in clear psychological language. And everybody was worried a little bit, because here's this person who's coming along with this great spiritual confidence and saying things that are different than what was said beforehand. Not content, but the language. And it's our job to bring his teachings back to the tour of the Balshentov, to show how he was no different than any other sadic, except that he had a specific language geared towards our psychological selves. - Any at the same time, so practical as far as every single day we are giving over receiving. And this seems to be like the biggest issue in relationships, the biggest issue in life. What energy are you in? Are you giving over receiving? - Yeah, for the Bala Sulam, he wasn't easy. He demanded work from us. Because if a person allows themselves to just be their natural human self, we become animal. - Exactly. - No, there's no two ways about it. It's not because we're bad. It's not because we're evil, it's because we're animal. We have a large part of us that's a Nehthashtha Bahamas. Left to its own devices, it's egocentric at its core. Not because it feels that it's better than others, but we only know how to worry about ourselves. And so the Bala Sulam came into the world and said, "Hash, I want you to do one thing to shift that orientation." Stop thinking so much about yourself and start thinking about others. - You can do for others. - And ultimately what we can do for God. - That's an area also where a person has to be very careful with because you can do so much for others, you can lose himself. I mean, as long as you don't lose yourself, like that's absolutely. - I sometimes took that a little out of context, "Okay, let me continue to do for others, but I'm losing my identity. I'm losing, I'm shrinking in myself." So we have to be careful, but a person has to do that, use the consciousness with that area. - I think what it's I remember-- - I'd rather do it. - I used to teach this in 12 step all the time, that if you're on an airplane, and let's say you're a stranger on an airplane, and your job now is to gauge how ethical a country is. And you're listening to the rules and regulations on the airplane, and you think, "Okay, they care about people, they care about their loved ones." Then suddenly they discuss that if the air pressure goes down in the cabin, there's this mask that's going to come down, and make sure you don't give it to your helpless child or the person that needs your help, make sure you focus on yourself most. If I was a stranger, I'd be like, "What in the world? That's at a left field." But the clarified wisdom says that the reason that you're taking care of yourself first is so that you could be of service to others afterwards. - Right. - If you're working for others to the detriment of working on yourself, it's codependency. - Okay. - So the definitions, you don't shrink yourself. You make space for others, you understand it, but you don't shrink yourself, and make yourself smaller just to make a person weak. It's like almost saying, listen, you got to gain 30 pounds so I could feel comfortable with my weight. - Exactly. We have to become a self first before we can give to another person. And if a person has not yet learned the boundaries of self, which means my ability to say no, then my yeses are somewhat meaningless. - Correct. - So I'm saying yes without knowing how to say no because I'm afraid of saying no because the moment I say no, I'm afraid the other person is gonna turn to me and tell me I'm worthless. So that means my yeses are coming from a place of duress. My yeses is coming from a need to be accepted, approved, and it has nothing to do with altruism or wanting to do for the other. It's about my need for self affirmation. That's the first and foremost we have to establish and double down on developing a sense of self, a healthy, minded sense of self. And from there we can flow for others in a healthy way. - And at the same time we get what we tolerate. So you know. - We get what we tolerate. We get what we tolerate. And the whole world is a classroom to learn the secret of tolerance. - Absolutely. - The whole world, the whole thing to realize that we can tolerate more than what our minds tells us that we can. - The whole world has a big problem and one of the things I was talking about is your table with some friends. And the comment team is, we know that one of the works of the mind is faith according to the Baselam. It talks about the work of the mind being able to have certainty, be on knowledge, understanding. And people are like, yes, I have faith but I have a control issue also. Talk about how that's completely conscious statement. Like the whole thing is to go over control. - Yeah, yeah. The greatest, the Baselam has a letter where he describes how the loftiest place in a person's mind is when they're able to give up hope on their own human efforts. When I'm able to fully realize that I am powerless and that all of my human efforts will not bring about the thing that I need. Not because I'm not good enough, but because it's only Hashem was the capacity to do anything. In that moment, a person embraces powerlessness and we feel a deep sense of relief. The most exhausting thing in the world is to feel that we have to be in control at all times. And that this world, this jungle of a world is under our supervision. It's enough to drive a person mad. I wouldn't get out of bed. - How would you advise on a practical level to get people to focus on getting rid of control? To get into this place of I and to get into this place of battle. - The thing that I've been speaking about more often than not is that moda-ani point. When I wake up before I got out of bed, let's look at the halah-hik reality of how we view this in between space. When I look at my day as an active place that I have to accomplish things, I can't do anything until I wash my hands. I have to purify myself from impurity and husk-sive impurity because when I sleep my imagination, this will look that, meaning there's a real sense of you come into the world liable to fail. And you have to be super, super careful. But before we get out of bed, there's a prior moment where we're able to talk to Hashem in a face to face way, where we're fundamentally becoming aware of our gratitude in the face of God. And it's at that point that we have to download our general perspective for the day. And then the rest of the day, I just have to set reminders for myself. - I love that. - We have to download this meditative space that Hashem today, I am operating in your world. I'm a character in your story. You are my author. - I want what you want. Help me understand how there's pleasure to be found in this world. Help me straight away from the things that take me off course. And then I can remind myself throughout the day, but that has to be the operating download. - You know, one of the lines that he said, he says, "The biggest cause of sadness is not one thing what God wants." Like, God wants us to have the eternal pleasures. God wants you to have so much more than you can imagine. The more you want to settle for like the 10 cents on the dollar, you know? - This is an article from the book. - It is the bahasulam has such a radical belief that Hashem is capital G good and that the world is meant to be good and the world is meant to be enjoyed. - Right. - We're meant to enjoy ourselves and he took this all from the Ramhaal. - Oh really, wow. - Yeah, the Ramhaal was the one who basically told us that the ultimate purpose in this world is the hisane gala shem to experience pleasure through connecting our minds and letting go of self and being dovakta shem. This is the birthplace of pleasure. It's not dopamine. It's not the pleasure that comes about through sex or food or drugs or anything like that. That's in its adoration of the pleasure principles within the brain. We're talking about a deep seeded sense of pleasure, which is rooted ultimately in the meaning that comes about by having a moon. - Hmm. You know, it's one of the things like, for example, the other pleasures that leave you with half of the desire and then you have to, you have to, you keep on running. This other pleasure is to, I feel like any spiritual pleasure that I've received, it implemented on my soul and I can always go back to that place. - Right, because spirituality doesn't dissipate. - Yeah. - It leaves an indelible mark on our soul that we can believe in. If I have to feel my spiritual value, I'm never going to be successful. Because it's not about feeling. Pleasure we've gotten so sidetracked by this dopamine perspective that pleasure is about feeling pleasure. Pleasure is about operating with a particular form of meaning that makes sense out of everything in my life. This is where a person can feel at ease. There's a person that says, "Whatever resolves a doubt," that's one of the greatest forms of happiness. Resolving a doubt is one of the greatest forms of happiness. But the Balhasulam explains it actually not as the greatest form of happiness, but the greatest form of pleasure. Oh wow. He says that the greatest pleasure in the world is the resolution of doubts. So the practicality would be that this person is going through a challenge. This thing is happening for me. Like life is happening for me, this is exactly the way it had to happen, the break up the this, the divorce, the this situation. It was all to my benefit. That's the resolution of that that we're talking about. Yes. Living with Hashgah, a practice. So you need faith to be able to resolve the doubts, to be able to get to happiness at the end. Faith is like the outlet. And what we plug into that outlet is going to be our Betachon and our knowledge of Hashgah a practice. In accordance with my download of faith in the morning, I struggle practice for all the people that is sick synchronosity, the concept of living to trust. It's in kronicity and seeing Hasham in my life at all times, seeing all of my events, however they look, and understanding that there is a hidden goodness that is not yet revealed to me. Now here's where people get confused in the teachings of the Balhasulam, because if the world is meant to be pleasurable, and the world is meant to be good, and the evidence of reality very often seems to express the opposite. So I had students tell me, you know, recently that it sounds like I'm siding with the abuser when I talk about God in this way. And I'm validating God's goodness, and I'm telling everybody to believe in the great goodness of God, and spread to the fact that people's evidence sometimes says the opposite. So the answer that the Balhasulam gives, and it's not, it's not something that satisfies us necessarily, but it's a mindset that we have to download. The fact that things are good, and the ultimate good doesn't mean that we have the perception to grasp that. That the ultimate good sometimes takes shape, but there are alama, it's hidden. Hasham hides himself in this world. We can't be surprised by that. And all the other things, yeah, not only is it not only is it is, and this is exactly what our Ahramah says, whoever believes that everything's happening for him, he gets a taste of the world to come. And I think we're both, me and you are both in the same, we're both in the same business of bringing consciousness to people. Consciousness is what builds temples. I mean, there is no consciousness, there's no temple without the content without that. It is the temple. It is, it is this, this was the pomegranate offering to the world. This is where the medicine comes from, that where you are in your mind is where you're at in your reality. 100%. And it's not, and it's not the external forms of manifestation. Right, you could manifestation and, you know, the promise, these are all really like, immature forms of spirituality, only because they make the mind into something powerful. The mind is the least powerful thing in the world. The mind has a power of being mvacul itself of understanding that it's a vessel for Hashem. And when the mind understands that it's a vessel for Hashem, then the thoughts that are coming down into my mind are no longer my thoughts. It's Hashem thinking through me. Wow. And that would be a fourth level of, that's the fourth level of receiving where you master, you master faith so much, we got to take over you. Yeah, exactly. And as Rabinachman says, well, it's really Rabinachson. And Rabitramah said, this is the most important place in Lukute Halachos. And he'll Khushluhim Halachadahad in the laws of messengers that ultimately our task in this world is to be the messenger that carries the light of God into places that they'll can't enter into. So that we're doing a mitzvah. If I'm lighting Shavus Campbell's or I'm putting on my thillin or I'm saying the words of thillah, I'm really doing it for Hashem. And it's Hashem who's giving me the strength to express these things. And so there's no distinction. The self becomes a vehicle. And that's right. That's another reason why we have to have kids in this world and we have to stop. We don't have kids. There's no legacy today. We're not thinking about carrying the message in generations. And this is where the selfish act of just I want to get married for myself. You're not begun the message, but you can't carry out the message throughout your life. It's the only thing that the Torah refers to abjectly as bad as evil. This unwillingness to create others. This unwillingness to want to have children. And it's not so much that we need more numbers or more bodies in the world. It's just that the entire purpose of being in this world is to do for others. Is to do for other. Is to be sto is to share is to carry the message is to be a link in a chain. That doesn't think that it's there to hold the light. The moment I think I'm meant to hold on to my light or hold on to my sense of well-being. Then I become stuck within myself. I have to be translucent like water. I have to allow the sunlight to move through me for others. Beautiful. You have no time in a they say if you go your mind is a dangerous neighborhood. Nobody cares. Going there on your own. If you're lost, if we're trying to work our own stuff out, we're not aware of where stuff comes from. And it's the 118 and it talks about we just read it on Rush Kharish. So there are a lot of things that are not about the world. There are a lot of things that are about the world. Let's talk about this practice. How in the world, how is the world? Each person opened intuitively. There are so much destructive elements in the world. We can no longer rest assured that a child will be able to naturally emerge into their ethical and moral nashama. One of the main points of shifting consciousness for others is letting them know that the difficulties and the hiddenness and the concealment in their life is not the opposite of God, but it's part of their relationship with God. This is the first corrective. The first corrective is to tell people you think God has only found in the light and he's not found in the darkness. You've limited God and now you have to understand that everything, the good and the apparently negative are both contained within the same light of us. And in that place, we extend the territory of encountering us. That's Alif, because how many people G'dalia are walking around not only with their own symptoms and feelings of failure, but the judge and the shame and the self-persecution that comes about because they feel they should be feeling differently or that they should be acting differently, but that they should be in a different state of mind. In recovery, they say you're shooting on yourself again. That's right. But when you say I should, you're already telling yourself that the way I am right now is not good enough. And then because there's too many people to blame in the world, I'm left to blame nobody but myself. And because I think I have a shock absorber that can handle all of this negative self-judgment, I feel it and then I don't pay attention to it. And it goes inside, I think it's gone. And then two months later I'm wondering why do I feel so heavy, why is life terrible? Because I've judged myself and I've made myself feel terrible for feeling not good. Do you think me and you, because we've dealt with it with people in recovery and the 12 steps, that we saw the Torah through a completely different angle? I think it comes back to the Malsimtov. I really do. I think it comes back to the Asimtov, but I think in our generation there is an emphasis that has to be focused on the healing element of Torah. The world is in a state sickness. Everybody needs healing. And we've forgotten about what healing means because now everyone's talking about psychedelics and this and that and everybody wants healing to just be, you know, dopamine. Healing is a slow and steady process of coming into my consciousness, of occupying my consciousness and being consciousness, and bringing back the fragmentation, bringing back the wholeness. And bringing everything back in, everything, no holds barred, seeing Hashem and being aware, being aware of my existence. The Pesat's Narebarrot, I just read a diary entry that he wrote in more saguetto, and he never meant for people to read these things. But we found it and he says it would be really great if God gave us two lives. The first 120 should be spent just working ourself. stuff out. And then the 120 should be that we can actually experience life. And he says, "But that's not how Hashem does it." And most people discover that they're ready to live when they're already dying. Once the way to live is to journal each day, because you have to look at yourself. We have to look at ourselves in this world. We have to be aware that we're alive. The deepest pleasure in the world is a drowning person who suddenly saves, because they're enjoying the deepest pleasure of just bare existence. It's incredible. It's incredible when somebody's something's taken away from you, and you go get it back to completely pleasure. I remember having a sports injury, where I couldn't work out for months. And when I get back to the gym, the pleasure that I had at that gym, I've never had that pleasure of never being hurt. Which is such an incredible concept of. Rehook, the Rehook, I look, Rabinachman, more than anybody has taught us that we tend to think that the Tsara, the pain, the difficulty, the concealment is only there to be gotten over so that I can then go and grow and receive a double portion if I pass the test. That still paints Hashem as kind of like a bully. And he's testing us and he's punishing us in order for us to pass the test, then find the light. Where Rabinachman explained is that no, the difficulty is where Hashem is. Wow. The difficulty is Hashem. It's a way in which Hashem is revealing himself to us in this moment. The same way physical pain got forbid, the same way emotional pain. All of these are malachin from Hashem. They're all just moments of conscious awareness. You see today the attachment sounds when people don't do the inner work. It becomes, you know, you're trying to control a person, suffocate the person. You know, where Ram Das is the best thing you could do is you go work on yourself, I'll go work on myself and we'll meet together in a couple of years. That's the goal in any relationship. That's it. I don't know anything. How refreshing is that sound? Like, do me a favor, you do your therapy. Let me do my therapy. And let's come back in a month or two months. And let's, let's, you know, we're all we're all we're blaming each other, we're forcing each other, we're suffocating each other. And that seems to be the common relationships today. It's everybody wants to control. Right. Control dynamics because everyone has been in the band them in styles and it's just it's like a, that's itself is a lack of conscious. The mistake is that people tend to think of a relationship as the face to face encounter where we turn away from the world and we turn to the other and they become our whole world. But that's not what a relationship is. A relationship is choosing that person that I want to face outwards towards the world with. Here's the person that I want to look at reality with and process reality with when I'm face to face, I can't tolerate any discrepancy or any differences. And then I try and force the other person to be like near force myself to be like the other person. And that's where resentments grow because I'm cutting arm and they're cutting off their arm and the hopes that we can make some sort of, you know, monstrosity together. The truth the matter is that husband, wife, partners are never meant to be the same. They're actually meant to be oppositional to one another. And that's where the magic happens. Wow. That's where the origins of life at itself that itself is like, you know, but who's teaching again, who is teaching these things? And that my whole system is assist these guys, the guy going to Shiva, the guy going these guys, there's not this information, the information is so wack, marry something like your mother, marry some, you understand the information from a repeat itself. Trauma is the most natural thing for trauma to do is to find another situation in which it can express its cycle in one more time. So it seems to be everybody's just walking into the same pit. And nobody told me, nobody told them, nobody write them, we have to do better, we have to do better at getting the word out. We have to, there's a lot of people, you know, we see in the outside world now that these speakers or podcasters are getting way too much platform time where their anti-Semitism and their poison is being spread forth like wildfire. And the world is aware that these people have what to say. The same should be true for pinimia satore. We have to be screaming at louder. We have to be staring at the more as medicine, not as here's how you reach the veicos. Here's how you reach divine consciousness. Who has patience? People want to figure out how to get out of bed in the morning. You know what the, you know what it has to do? As far as we've said about that, it's, it can give it Hawkins says it the best. He says, the hate's already inside. They just needed an outlet like Tucker Carlson to like stress all stress and hate is eternal, internal. We just need outlets. Say, oh, Carlson, you can't disowns. That's the, that's the outlet. Anti-Semitism, anti-Semitism is the hate of the earth. Anti-Semitism is the hate that's built into existence from the very inception point. Hashem decided that he wanted to be, that there should be antagonism against the Jewish people. And we see in certain moments where there are mouthpieces in the world that are given the opportunity to unleash their, their vial poison. And we can't be surprised. We can't be afraid. We have to be prepared. And we have to dig down deeper into the confidence of what it means to be Jewish. Person should know and be armed with the fact that to be Jewish, to have a Jewish soul, not talking about being better than anybody else or being, you know, but there is nothing greater in existence than being endowed with a soul. Nothing. We have the greatest capacity in the world to change things. Wow. And they say the thing also the same, the problem. If it's nothing used in the right way, it's being used in the wrong way. Exactly. Exactly. But every year, the moment I have to value how many times a day do I want to honk loudly out of people who caught me off here in Israel. I think that when I hold back from honking, the morning, lo, hayame, o non, there's never been such a novelty. No kid is Hashem has ever been made like me. And in that moment, I'm looking up to Hashem and I'm saying Hashem, you see, I remember the mission here. There's somebody in this twisted dark world who remembers the mission to be kind, to be compassionate, to make space for others to overcome the temptation towards immediate reactivity, the zehu. And in that moment, to get registered as a win, a real moment of consciousness. You know, yeah, he'll Hashem is an absence of God. Khalag. It's not that the guy, it's, that person is missing light. Just like a sick person who's sick. Person is healthy. He's full of light. But a person who creates a desecration of God's enemies is missing. He's missing light. The task for us has never been greater for every Jew, no matter where they find themselves, no matter how irreligious or religious they might be. There's no distinction at the core base level of the soul between a person who's never done a medspa or a person who's done all of the medsvas. On the core level of the soul, which is the mashyah consciousness, every Jew is equal in the face of God. Every Jew is three, he means two seconds and you know, we're not one as a beautiful Torah, less than 17 and a second half for the kutamaran. And he says, God does not look at the wickedness of, of Yaku. He doesn't look at the wickedness of Yaku. That means that we're not set up to look at the families. The thing is, if you want to live, and he talks about it in that Torah, if you decide to live in a world of the Harshqah Proct, you think God's going to watch you. But if he does, you know what I live in a world of divine organ, then he's going to leave you to nature. It's in the mind. It's in the mind. Yeah, not a punishment. It's a, you decide to go in this world. That's an effect, exactly. Puzzle in fact, exactly. No, this is, I have, we have to choose what we want to believe in in this world. Right. When the going gets tough and it's so reasonable to believe in chaos and overwhelm and sadness and despondency and hopelessness, other Abba, the opposite is true. We have to strengthen ourselves and tap into positive points. This is in the end of the day, the only lesson that will remain, to find the positive point in the moment in front of me right here right now. One of the things that changed my life, 100% changed my life about learning how to see the weather of Nakhrib al-Sulam, well-shemt of, it's focused on your attitude first, then the conditions. And this is completely the opposite of the world. How is your attitude in this crisis? How is your attitude? First attitude through joy you will go out versus the conditions are going to change my attitude. I thought that was, that, that to me. It's everything, but this was the, this was the novelty of the Balshemt, those form of medicine. He came into a sick world and he said, instead of dealing with symptoms, let me reveal to them that they're already healthy. So that once you know you're healthy, then you can deal with the things that make you not feel of. And you have much more confidence in yourself. If you start with your symptoms, you're done because you'll never come into a place to feeling healthy. Who can feel healthy in this world, except unless you radically accept it as a God-given tree. I am good. I have a soul. And your symptoms also, you have the, not only do you have the symptoms, but then you have the paranoia, you have the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, one thing's got for a bit of, I get diagnosed with, you know, with cancer, got for that. And then he's going to get, now it's going to be paranoid about the seven, the worst-case scenario. Everything got for that. Yeah, it's too easy for a person, a person is one step away in this world of falling into, of falling into the abyss of anxiety. A person left to the, gravity, I would say. It's almost gravity. But it's gravity, right? Depression, these things are afar. The most natural proclivity of the self is to be inactive is to not do, especially when the world seems to be despair-oriented. There's no greater thing than his Hodgius and lighting oneself on fire. Even if it's a self-cut, if it's a self-created flame, even if I'm the one creating the inspiration, It doesn't matter. inspiration, awakens the self to be proactive about how I'm going to experience life. You know, Ramachman said there's two ways. One time you can actually, you could actually inspire yourself by praying loudly. And second way he also says you can inspire yourself by inspiring others. So it's really in our hands. He's easier with others, he says. It's all well. But it's easier. Sometimes it's much harder to talk to oneself. The others, you know, that's you can like people up. Souls are waiting to be lit up. Every face, every face that we encounter on a certain level should hold us hostage. They should hold us and say, until I'm able to say, how can I help you? This is another thing Ramachman said. Ramachman said, like, he came to a point in his life where he said the only thing that I actually want to say is how can I help you? Wow. It's the only words he felt were necessary for you. None of them are human beings to say. Wow. And it's funny how God purpose, Ramachman, lesson 21, that he'll purposely, he'll purposely, you'll need other people to give over your Machiav. You're personal, he needs, you need other people to discuss. Otherwise, you'll never get new information. So like we're wired to connect. And we could see why when we have seen not to get on, we don't love each other, not only to be lose the broof and we lose the expanded consciousness that comes. It's all rooted in the same thing. Yeah. We want to be like God and we think that we can be like God and God is isolated on a certain level. So we think we could do it on our own. And that's where we get lost. That's where we become our own about the Zara. That's where we become harmful to others. That's when we become self-serving. The only thing we have to recognize is that we are not God. We are creatures and we need people. We need us. And you do how? Right, that's the first word in the 12 steps is we. We admitted we were powerless. It's talking to one person, but there has to be a sense of togetherness. Person needs friends to rely upon. The Bala Sulaam says that the only Bakhira, the only true choice that a person has are the people that they connect themselves to. They're friends. They're friends in this world. The person needs a Javir, a person needs connection, a person needs the ability to relinquish some of this heaviness of needing to carry it all. It's too much for anybody. And it seems to be everything in life that usually is hit so hard as when we're holding on to things. It's a lack like either Thedav says, expression is the opposite of depression. And Al-Phan says, it's not the blue hole said, it's not the load. It's the way you carry it. Right, we spoke about Ruf Kuk also that all anger comes from unexpressed spiritual creativity. Wow. Right, it's like carrying a stillborn within the self, God forbid. It's like having something that needs to be expressed, but holding it within, eventually a person is going to feel just, you know, spiritually constipated, so to speak. I feel like you share a lot. I feel like that's you're always sharing things. I have to. You have to turn on the faucet. To turn on the faucet otherwise as a vada Tbjani. And the benefit is that it's beneficial to others. It's a person has to find the way of expressing themselves. A person must, even if it's to themselves, a person doesn't need to become a frontal facing person. You don't need permission and you don't need permission. Nobody needs permission. Nobody needs permission anymore. And nobody cares. Nobody's looking at you all day long either. So if you want to understand that, you don't need to make every right permission is granted. Harushas Nesuna and Adaraaba and Adaraamhaal writes that in our generation, each and every one of us are responsible to pick up the beacon of shining light for others in this world. In a dark world, each and every one of us has the responsibility of choosing to shed light for another person to illuminate the darkness. In the generation of Arbisheem and Bajoyohai, they would see a stranger walking on the road and they would say, open up your mouth and illuminate the world. You're incredible today. People talk to come to me all day long with salvation. So I said, it's your duty to tell the salvation over to people. And if you tell your salvation over to people, what's going to happen, you're going to get another salvation. To the side of the road. Tell me, you know what they tell me, I'm afraid I'm going to get the evil eye. Right, everyone's very afraid of the evil eye. You understand? I'm just a mindset. God is your praising God and you're afraid to tell people about the salvation. So you get an evil eye. So now you don't have any more since this is God's name, you're not afraid of anything. Yeah, we're so delicate and we're so afraid. Binachman speaks of such spiritual courage, such spiritual courage of the ability to break on through to the other side and stop caring. Stop caring, say, huh? Stop caring so much. Binachman uses in two different places, the language of that a person has to be connected to a shem to such a degree, add shalom, yechbat, like flour, until they don't care about anything. Wow, I don't care. I don't care. I care about finding light in this moment right now. I don't care if all evidence tells me the opposite. And I'm care of every anti-Summit in the world once to point out every issue with the Yiddin on every level. I'm done even caring whether they're true or not, let their claims be true. It doesn't make a difference. Our only job is to spread more and more light in this moment. This is what a person has. Abraham is one. Abraham is one. That's it. That's it. The moment the moment I pay attention to the naysayers or the imagined naysayers, then a person retreats back into into the wrong type of anonymity of the feeling of a weakness that who says I have the right to do anything. The Balasulah, the prophet, the letter to his Tamiyid, and he says, my whole life, I've never asked this question. I never felt the need to ask the question of why me, why am I the one who's given the ability to spread spirituality? He says, I felt it, so I did it. He said, I felt it, so I did it. There's no time to spend time contemplating. You know, it took him 12 years, I believe, to even how long did it take the Balasulah? The sum was very interesting, sold when he came in, but it took him a long time to be able to start. I also heard something, something 12, something 10 years. That's for a long time. Like, Raspih had to sit, like the Ariesah had to sit, like all of the Saddiqim would all sit. Doesn't mean the first perk time that I feel I have something to say to the world I immediately say, sad with it for 10 years. Older, it a person has to cultivate their oaths in the Torah. Most people say, like, how can I teach each and every person receive the Torah? The Torah was given for each and every person to the degree that if only that person received the Torah, then it would have been enough. Each person knows what the Torah is saying to them. Each person knows what the healing words of comfort that they can share with themselves, with others and what the world is. This is Shavu'iz, right? This is teaching 56 of each person has their malchus. Each person has a sphere of influence. Right. And the cool thing is that we have no idea what our sphere of influence is. Right? I can have 500 people listening to a class and I can see a stranger walking on the street, and that person walking on the street could have a far greater influence than I do, even though in an external level I'm speaking to more and more people. We have to understand that our spiritual work is having an impact on reality. Every ounce of effort, there will be no sense to share this all the climate. It doesn't go away. It's not wasted. Right. And even says the minute you go to another level, your automatically lifting another person up another level, even if they didn't do anything. Exactly. It's like it's an incredible concept. That means the more you grow, practically in your life, the more you are pushing people up, they're all getting an upgrade. That's also because it's my world. It's my world. Wow. Everybody exists in my world. The same way I exist peripherally in your world, you exist peripherally in my world. And both of us are the soul inhibitors of reality. So I would say that the root, based on our conversation, the root cause would be the self-centeredness of saying, this is all about me. You know, self-centeredness, everything about oneself, being too stuck in their own head. For the nation, for the nation. First and last, to forget the self, we have to become translucent. We have to care about others. We have to care about Hashem. We have to want to share the good word about how Kaddush Barhur in the world. We have to remind people that it's a good world. Even if we have to tell stories, right? Dorganachman said, like, I'll teach it to you, but that might not do the trick. I might even have to start making up stories to convince you of it, but so be it. So be it. Whatever it takes, whatever it takes. Yeah, he said, first start, look at the barren. If you can't do that, then look at the kids are then advice. Then I'll have bet. If you can't even hand, pal, if bet you got, we'll wake you up with the story. Dream, dream, dream it into existence. Nobody knows what reality is. Nobody knows what consciousness is. Nobody knows what quantum is. Nobody knows where the aliens are. We don't know anything. And it's going to become clearer and clearer and clearer. And the more we're focused on our own power and possession, the more frightening it's going to be, the more information comes to light. But the less possessively are, okay, new information. The light, there's aliens. Okay, what do I care? The more you realize you know nothing, the more the more grateful you are, the more teachable you are, the happier you'll be. But the more you think you know everything, the more ungrateful you'll be, the sadder you'll be, and the more anxious you'll be, the more depressed you'll be. So it's like it's a rest to keep one of the other. The ways a person down, Hashem is the greatest drug in the world. Even if that's the motivation for serving him for the relief that comes from it, Let that be our little. for now. Eventually we'll come to higher levels of Lishma, but seeking relief through spiritual connection is more than enough of a motivating factor to enter into Bodhisattva Kadesh. Also, Mastrasu said, "It says 1,000 percent, I think a thousand percent of any spiritualize, 1,000 times more than any physical light." If we believe in what we're reading, we know that one mitzvah that we did is enough to sit back and relax and enjoy the show. We have to believe in our spiritual, but he does say, but each and every day we have to get about our spiritual growth and start again. Were you saying this exactly what I'm not saying less than 24? Is this depending on how you value a mitzvah is the infinite light that you're getting in that mitzvah? Yes. If you really believe that the infinite light you did, it would be like saving you know, 100 people from death. Imagine if you saved 100 people from death, you know, you would be dancing in the sky. The equivalent to putting on the villain, but the problem is, again, because of the sadness, we don't value what we do. And we live in a post-capitalistic society which has valued, you know, quantity over quality and we're judged based on our production value and how it can be sold, etc. So we've completely been taken away of the capacity of believing in the inherent value of each and every moment of conscious awareness in this world. You know, when I go to Europe sometimes in the summer, I'll go for a week or two and they kick two months off in Europe. Okay. And I'm saying, when I get there, I almost get like, and first I get, I'm like, wow, what a life. And then the second we become almost an anxiety, how could these people not work for two months? What are they doing? Yeah, at the same time, they're happier, they're skinnier, they're healthier, but we're programmed in America. If you're not working eight, nine hours a day and you're not doing this, this something's wrong with you. It just, it's, when you go to your, what, what are my missing here? Because it's rooted ultimately in the belief that man can become God. And if it can become God, God forbid, then man can be perfect. And if it could be perfect, then our imperfections are our own fault. And if our imperfections and our own fault, then pleasure is sinful and communists is sinful because we've got to be working off that original sin every second to scrub the stain of being human. Yiddish shows up and says, other Maharisham was not perfect. Other Maharisham was not perfect before the hate. No human being will ever be perfect. Our job is to make sense out of our human imperfections. Bro, it has made worlds before eating protocol. Exactly. Exactly. And this frees the mind to stop chasing this artificial form of perfection. A person can work endlessly in the hopes that it's going to provide them with that secret thing that's going to finally make them comfortable. It's not. They can forget themselves, they can obliterate their minds. But in the end of the day, we have to come to a place of all-rightness in the face of Hashem, even when we're not doing anything. That's secret of Shabbos. Yeah. That's merely Dish Tusa. We have to mammish, laugh at the world. We have to make a whole joke out of the world. We have to take it seriously but also laugh at it at the same excited. And throw our moukh in the way and say, Hashem, I am here with you today. You know, I'm going to show up to the best of my ability. I think that's the first thing when you get to Rabeenachman's teachings, they tell you throw your throw whatever you know, throw it away. And I think luckily, because I went to public school and never went to the shiver or anything. I came in with with not that much garbage. So I came in ready to learn. But how many times people walk in with all these things? For the holic to call them. Yeah, Chachmah. Everybody has Chachmah. Everybody has their understanding of how the world is operating. The only Chachmah there is to know is to know that we don't have Chachmah. That's right. And that's not saying what's value stupidity. Adara, but every second that I learned something, I rebuilt the temple of not knowing on top of that base of, and I create these landscapes of, look how far it can be knowing that I don't know. Rabeenachman says in lesson 53, he says that wisdom is much more. One thing, a thought has potential power, but wisdom is even valuable. You know, wisdom is, is koachmah, hachmah, koachmah, the power of knowingly, I don't know anything. I don't know anything, Hashem. I don't have possession in this world. Look, this is what forces me to lean fully into that, which is present in front of me. If I think my family is my own, if I think I'm the one in control of how long things are going to go, then why don't I have to pay attention to it today? Let me pay attention to it tomorrow. It'll be there tomorrow also. We have to know anything. So we have to have to put effort, but at the same time, you have to let go of it. That's what I was saying. Just completely do nothing. You have to put the effort, but you do let go of it. In the beginning, that you start off with letting go. You start off the day with letting go, and then you engage in effort, and then you remind yourself in the middle of the day to let go. And everyone says he would never force since to happen. He would never, there's a time where he was coughing and didn't want to interrupt the person because it maybe wouldn't go his way, but he does it. Things are not going to go you, things are not going to go in the order that you think they need to go. And if you don't have a relationship with that, you're going to have a very, very miserable. The person has to wake up already in the morning with the knowledge that, okay, the first letter of the Torah is a base, not an alif. It's not meant to be a singular unity. It's not meant to look the same. It's not meant to be easy. It's already split. It's already split. My job is to find the alif within the base. I'm supposed to unify the split, the tarant, rea- Wow. Instead of thinking like Hashem, why don't you give me a perfect semblance of reality? We'll see that when the shiaf comes, and even there it's not. You remember, an aquaun doesn't listen to you too, that a person, this is exactly why we were born in Tishra, because Tishra is Tarshach. It's out of order. And your whole, the boon in this world is make order, make order from this order. That's it. That's that's how we deal with our symptoms. Each person has their own unique symptom, their own chisaron. And instead of judging ourselves, our first step as R. Binachman says is that I could be sad about my deficiencies, and then I realized that Hashem is revealing the deficiencies for me to do the work with him. And how great is that that Hashem is speaking to me in this way? I always find that before I have a very, very, very big breakthrough in my life, I'll go through a massive embarrassment stage, massive embarrassment. And as long as I just get out of the way and say, this is exactly what you want, the breakthrough comes 10 times than it could even imagine. Yeah, yeah. The film "The Gormais" said, the film "The Gorms" said that he was embarrassed once by somebody, and he was very excited about it. And it's told me the amassed, how could he be excited about this? This person just embarrassed you. He says, "If I had the strength, I would dance until I had no more strength. You have no idea how we're in the shuffle that comes down to a person when they feel slighted, when they feel wrong, and they're able to be silent from the face of it. It doesn't mean being a pushover, it doesn't mean letting it active, but it means letting go of resentment." The dome goes to the dome. Yes, the dome transforms into the dome. The bud, the rage, gets transformed into a certain silence that's not like a meekness that says, "I'm too weak to confront this." It says, "I see beyond this. I don't have time to this. I'm seeing I see the taخless. I see Hashem in the distance. I'm not getting caught up with this person who just bothered me." Wow. Wow. I'm not going to let me. There's not enough time and reality to rent out space in my head to fools. Wow. Amazing. Rabbi, I can't express to you how Pajr is always talking to me. That's always so much. There's so much to tell. We would be, we could be here for hours. Okay, we'll do it again. We've got to do it again, but we want to make it tangible of the not caring. Live your life, grow, share, and stop caring about people. Relax. Relax. Manu khasana-shas is the goal. Manu khasana-shish of hadas, a certain perspective that's no longer bothered, no longer bothered by the things that I don't have to be bothered by. If I'm in a circumstance in my life, I'm still dating. I'm in this place that I have to engage in processes of caring. Then before I enter into my garments of caring, I have to lean into not caring. And then after I've cared, I have to return back to not caring. They have to be my bookmarks. The same way I wake up in the morning, I tap into the infinite, Hashem. I go to sleep by night, I tap into the infinite light of Hashem. The middle period is where I'm a human being and trying to do things. Exactly. It's funny to love when we hire you attract a person's by not caring if they care about you so much. Then you're yourself and then they actually care about you. But the more you care that they care about you, whether or not they care about you, the more you function like, the more that's the more it causes the end. We have to let go. You gave me the book. We have to let go and let God. And it's not two stages. It's not that if I let go, then I let God. The act of letting go is already allowing God into our lives. Because the Shama is a khilak alaykha'imim al and the Shama knows its way. When we have to get the debris, connect ourselves to good people and good friends and we become vessels for blessing. That bless you Rabbi. Excited. Yes. Yes. God willing us to see his name. Amen.