The Rental Car Robbery

The following program contains names, places and events that have been anonymized or fictionalized for the purposes of protection and safety. The following program is provided for entertainment purposes only, and any commentary from the hosts are strictly conjecture and should not be held as making any definitive statements about the truth or identity of any particular individuals or circumstances. If you or a loved one are involved in an abusive relationship, please call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233-4-Support. Good morning happy dating detectives Monday. I love how many people comment and say that saying happy dating detectives Monday, like makes their week because it's a holiday every week. Everybody gets so excited they're like oh my god what kind of shit show do you have for us today? Oh no what we do have a shit show today Rachel is our guest today and she is a good example of someone who went through an experience and is like oh hold my beer like give me the microphone I need to spread the word you'll hear obviously from her but I'm really glad that she chose to increase the reach of her story here because she's posted online. It's one of those stories where the relationship itself really doesn't get out of the dating stage like it's pretty quick and yet the damage is long lasting yeah it's one of those things that you just can't get away from and it sucks because it feels like it's like a scarlet letter almost one of those types you know what I mean it's very frustrating you're gonna be frustrated it's got some financial scam situation so let's let her tell the rest of the story but first order of business we have shows more shows I'm so excited for you guys to come here are you excited to come to Florida? I am beyond excited especially I know we talked about it a little last week but I just can't stop saying how great Chicago was everyone we met was oh my god isn't it amazing my new favorite city new favorite city and I love literally everybody who came to the show it was so awesome I know everybody says the Midwest is nice but truly the den theater the staff was so sweet they were everyone we met it was just so sweet and you guys were so fun and involved like we gave everybody red flags so obviously when you feel like this red flag you can wave your red flag it was so interactive and it was funny like we would somebody would be telling us story and you'd see all these red flags shoot up like oh yeah so this guy started talking and then all the red flags it was funny so Orlando and Tampa is coming up and if you want to tell your story well obviously if you want to come there's tickets in the show notes so get your tickets but if you want to come and come on stage and share a story it does not have to be a super long dogfish story it can be a crazy dating story we just want to talk to y'all and hear your stories but we need you to submit them ahead of time so you know the drill if you have a story email investigate at the dating detectives podcast.com if you're in Orlando or you're in Tampa and you want to chat with us we want to hear from you so look at the dates and the info in the show notes we cannot wait to meet you in Florida and as always I know you guys are good about this but tell us where else we should go yeah absolutely pretty well I think we should do more a lot of people I come to this day come to this day come to Texas all these different places so I think that's really you know so thank you so so so much and I think let's get into it let's let Rachel tell her story you guys are gonna bridge hi Rachel hi Rachel thank you for being here hi we're so glad that you're here we would like to give you the floor will you please take us on your journey yes my name is Rachel I live in San Diego so basically me and my two best friends Olivia and Brooke we decided to go on a trip to Zion National Park in Utah and while we were there we thought we may as well we have this rental car go for a day trip to Vegas it's not too far of a drive and we're always down for something spontaneous so we did on our last full day we packed up the car and we drove down to Vegas we just planned on going to a day party and then one of my friends is sober so she was gonna drive his home that night just in time for our other friend to get on her flight the next morning back home while we were there it was so much fun we had a great time at the pool party went down to the casino after had a couple more drinks just having a great time and then as we were on our way out of the casino my friend broke ran into this guy that she knew from previously while she was talking to him I noticed that the friend he was with was sitting at the slot machine he kind of looked cute I decided I was gonna go over and introduce myself I did that his name was Logan I introduced myself I'm sitting with him he offers me a drink or two we're having a great time we hit it off right away and then he's asking how long I'm gonna be there for how long does he get to spend with me and I was like approximately 10 minutes before we could try to go and then he started offering you know what you should say and I was like a cat my friends got her flight tomorrow and then he's offering to pay for her a new flight and then I was like well we don't have a hotel and then he's offering to pay for a hotel and then oh my usually that's not something that I will accept that kind of offer but I don't know Brooke knew the guy he was with I thought it was chill we all kind of looked at each other like let's do it should we yeah wow can I ask like how old are y'all at this point you're obviously I assume single yes all of us were single at this time I was 27 Brooke was 28 and Olivia is 26 at this point and these guys how does she know this guy just she met him back home at an event I guess he had come to our town and I guess they had the little fling that was casual but nothing crazy came from that so it wasn't like a random person friend it was like a past hookup that makes sense yeah but nothing like too serious or long term or anything like it was like oh I I know you I remember you from that one night at the club type of situation so yeah and then after he offered to pay for those things we felt like you know why not she doesn't have work for a few more days she doesn't have to get back to the city right away so let's just stay and so we do this is like so vegas just to be like you know what that's what I was thinking in the moment too I was like what's the worst that could happen like this is vegas coated we'll have so much fun we're all very smart girls we're not going to take the hotel room yeah exactly so we do spend the night together the whole group of us he ends up booking us two really nice rooms for us all to share just spoiling us to the nine's food anything we wanted ordering it right away for us the moment I said I wanted something he was like on his phone ordering it and then I was like oh shit we need two fresh shoes toothpaste we don't have any of this stuff because we weren't prepared to stay the night so we all go to CVS and again he offers to pay for everything he's like go down whatever aisles if you want some alcohol for tonight if you want snack something for your dry poem tomorrow like whatever you want get it it's on me and I mean who wouldn't want to hear that and go for a little shop yeah thank you fella I appreciate this right and there was no feeling of like I'm gonna pay for this stuff but you better spend the night with me like he was nice and gentlemanly no nothing at all he was flirting with me but I didn't feel any type of pressure like if I got all of that and then I was like you know what I don't really feel great like I'm gonna actually head home tonight we're gonna hit the road I didn't feel like he would have any issue with that he was so nonchalant but still flirting made sure that his interest was showing but without like feeling pressured at all because I I get the if so fast if someone makes me feel like pressured into anything and I did not get that worse at all with him so yeah we spend the night we don't go out out but we like hit a couple bars we walk around three months we're drinking the whole time and me and him spent the night together in one of the hotel rooms and it was honestly so nice like I get the if when I think about it now because of what I'll share but in that moment it was so romantic he got us a room with like a big jacuzzi and he got all these facts prize from the CVS and like just on that side call really nice evening for the two of us and it was great I had a great time and I was really excited because during that we discovered that we didn't live too far from each other me living in San Diego and him living in LA not far at all so and like usually that doesn't happen when you meet someone on vacation I feel like usually you meet somebody it's at one night or one vacation fling and then you never hear from them again but we were so close so I was excited I was like I get to keep getting to know you and keep getting spoiled yes yes you're so right it was gonna be great what did he do for a living so he sold electronics and appliances buying them from like auctions and stuff and then fixing them up and reselling them for more than he paid is what he was doing for his job he so he was entrepreneurial didn't really work for anybody kind of worked for himself the next day we left or like they were leaving we were leaving he like offered to fill up our rental car with gas too just everything you could think of that he could possibly paid for he was offering to pay for get it guy yeah I know it was so nice at the time and then we go back to Zion National Park enjoy the rest of our stay head home once I get home we and him we're still talking he's not big on FaceTime calls or phone calls so it was mostly just texting which I didn't love I do prefer a good FaceTime or phone call but no we start dating ish we're not like official or anything but the intention from what he was saying was definitely we're getting to know each other with the intention of dating and I was very honest from the jump that my last relationship wasn't so great and I'm definitely not looking for anything casual or wishy washy where I feel insecure in the relationships like I want to put that on the table right now that I'm looking for something serious and he agreed that he was looking for the same thing. How long had it been since your last relationship ended? My last relationship formally ended in like 2022, the summer of 2022, but then we kind of stayed connected for another year until 2023. So I would say that it was about like two and a half, three years that I had been single for before meeting him. That's a while. Yeah. It had been a while. Yeah. And it was not a good breakup the last one. So I felt like I had to come into that so honest with him. And it was so nice to finally hear from a guy that they are looking for that because I feel like usually when you tell a guy that they're just like, okay, I'm out of here. I'm not looking for the same thing or they lie to you. Yeah. And then yes, actually. So we start talking about coming to see him, come to me coming to visit him. And, you know, we're getting to know each other. He tells me about his family. He has two kids. Surprisingly for me, that's not something I care about. I didn't bother me, but he told me about them. He was very honest, which I appreciated that he let me know that right away. He told me that they were two separate moms, one of them being a one-night stand. And the baby was very young, I should say. He was like two years old, I think. So he was like, that was a one-night stand. I'm not like involved with the mom or whatever. Tell me he hadn't been in a serious relationship since high school. And he was like, it's kind of just telling me exactly what I was telling him, but in a different font. Like, same thing. I haven't been in a relationship for so long. And like, I'm also looking for something serious and meaningful with you. We can I hear more about, I got to hear more about his kids. So do all the kids live in the same city as him? Was he like, cute dad energy when he talked about them? One of them, he said lived in the area with his with the mom primarily. And then he just had the kid on weekends. The other one lived a little bit further away. And he definitely was giving like, cutesy dad, got to go to his football games, his basketball games. Whenever we would go out shopping, he would be in the kids section looking for stuff for his sons as well, which I thought was really admirable. And he seemed to be a very present great father, which I found very attractive. So I end up going to visit him two weeks after I got back from my vacation. He books me a train ticket because it's just the easiest quickest way to get to him. I don't have a car myself. So he books me a train ticket. I head down. When I get there, he suggests that we rent a car for a weekend. So we can go around. He said his car was like, I don't know whether it was like a tire was locked. He had issues with his car. Something was wrong with his car. And he couldn't drive it. And so he says, just that we rent a car. No problem to me until he says that his license is suspended. And so he's wondering if I can go under my name. Oh, in the moment, I didn't think it was a big deal. Because I was like, you know, everything so far had been so good. And like, everything for things. And he's been spending. So yeah. I was like, yeah, for sure. Like, what's the big deal putting it on my name? And we went on to the website. He said it was something to do with speeding. He made it seem very casual. And like, I don't know about he, but I'm saying the I go, you can get your license and spend it for pretty much anything if the cops having a bad day. So in my mind, I just made it seem like less than it was. Like he made it seem like less than it was. I'm like, oh, you know, you go on one too many speeding tickets. His license got suspended. It's not a big deal. No problem. Like, I'll rent the car. So we go onto the hurts website and everything, checking the price. So he can give me the money in advance. And like, this was his suggestion to do. So I felt very comfortable doing it. So we go, we rent the car. I put it under my name. And I obviously put it on my credit card too. And we use the car. We have a great weekend. His apartment was full of all those appliances that he was selling. So he suggested that we go stay at a nice hotel instead, have a nice romantic overwater stay. And I'm a piacise. I love being by the water. So that was just music to my ears. I was like, lovely. Let's do that. So he booked us this really nice hotel over the water with again, another jacuzzi. And he was like, we'll never have a hotel room without a jacuzzi with me. Okay. So yeah, looks at that. Just treats the whole weekend. Again, just how it was that first weekend, you know, food orders whenever I wanted something to eat. I once mentioned I wanted some fruit. And the next thing I know fruit was showing up at our hotel was like, what the heck? We went shopping. We went to eat. We went to the casino again. Just had a really great time. And then Sunday rolled around where I had to head back home. So I could go back to work on Monday. And I was getting ready to pack up my stuff and, you know, suggest we go drop off the car before we hit the train station or just drop it off. And he's like, oh, you're coming back next week to visit me again. Do you think that I could just use the car for these errands? I have to like move this TV, whatever. Wait, but is he even allowed to drive it? Not technically. Technically no. But again, I was just blinded by just like the exciting weekend I had wanting to come back the next weekend to have that same week. Like, you know, I wanted to do it again. So I was like, sure, yeah. No problem. We can do that. Let's see how much it's going to charge for the extension. And then if you can send me the money, blah, blah. And he did, we checked how much it would be to extend it till that next weekend. He sent me the money right away for it. And then I left. He dropped me off at the train station and I left the car with him. I get back. We're talking. It's good. His texting's not the best, but it's like manageable or bearable, I should say, for me, but I like to be communicating all the time. So already not this time. Yeah. His texting being slow. I was just like, uh, this sucks. But even maybe want to go back more so that I could skip the phone communication and just be with him to talk and get to know him more. And I was so, so excited about the weekend in Vegas and then the weekend at his house that I was just so hyper focused on having that experience again. It's always so tricky when their texting communication is way worse than their in-person communication. Because you're like, I don't know, it's such a, it's such a little game that it plays with your brain. Oh, yeah. Yeah. It's the push and pull of like, wait, I'm making me more attracted to them. Yeah. Because of it. Oh, yeah. You're still mad about it. No, it's like so common, I feel like. That's nice to hear because I felt so like, oh my gosh, why did it like after the fact? Like, uh, no. Why was I so blinded? It's so common. I mean, how often do we hear like, oh, I'm just about texture. Like, oh, I just, I'm like, not on my phone all the time. And it just, it's almost makes you want that more. Because then you're like, maybe I can make them a better job. Exactly. Yeah, literally, like, you're going to like me so much that you're going to want to text me, or at least that's what I should be. But yeah, so I extend the car for him, go home, his texting's like, eh, but it still is not terrible. It's just like, I would have appreciated it a little bit more, especially after having those two weekends together. Time goes on. We're planning the next visit. He's not like, again, being as responsive. I end up not coming back that next weekend. I couldn't come. It wasn't his doing. He did have all of it set up for me to come. So I can't really fault him for that weekend. Me not coming. I couldn't get off of work. I couldn't go. But then I have to return the car by that day, because that's when I extended it to. So I'm letting him know, can you please just drop off the car? He's telling me he can't return it unless I'm there, because then I'll get like, Bill, find me for having someone else drive the car, which they would know because he would be the one dropping it off. And manipulated it to seem like, I can't. You have to keep it rented or extended until you come back so that you can return it. And so extended again. We plan another visit. So then I end up going back to visit him a few weeks later. This trip, it was definitely different. He didn't care so much now that his apartment was full of things and kind of a mess. It was all good. If we stayed there this time, there wasn't a hotel booked. And like, I don't need that. I don't want to preface. Like, I totally find if people like my apartment would not always spot this clean, that is not an issue to me. But obviously the expectation had been set. He told me that anytime there would always be a jacuzzi stay. And I was like, okay, so it's fine, but weird to switch up like that. So we stay at his apartment. We don't even go out as often as time. Like, we're really just inside watching movies, not doing too much. I started noticing that he goes to the bathroom for long periods of time and we're at his house. He's got an idea for sure. Oh yeah, definitely IBS or something. I hope it's IBS and not like drugs or something. Well, that's when I started to think out for the fact I was like, oh dear, like, what the heck have I gotten myself into. But even when even come out, we'd be laying in the bed watching a movie and he's always playing these freaking casino games on his phone, which I never know what it's all because we were actually actively out doing things. So he couldn't. But the moment that we were just casually at his house, yeah, a lot of tricks to the bathroom that lasted quite some time playing these casino games on his phone. But then when I would talk to him, he was like responsive. He was actively listening to what I was saying. So it's not like he was not listening or not conversing with me and just checked out on his phone. He would just be like on it, but like talking to me. I was like, hmm, I don't love that. But I was just like mental, no one thinks at this point because it's still early. You're still just making those mental notes. Are these casino games gambling games? Are they just silly little games or is my no, I think they were actually gambling games. I don't play any of those so I don't know for sure, but from the looks of it, they looked like those like I get ads for them all the time of those slot machines where it's like you're guaranteed to win this much money if you put $20 in all of those kinds of apps that I didn't look closely or ask specifically what they were, but I do think right they were probably real gambling. He doesn't strike me as the type who I met in Vegas to be like big gambling if that makes sense. Okay, sure. So his attitude kind of changed a little this trip. He's a little more comfortable, a little more familiar. Yeah, definitely. He's still comfortable. Still cute, still like his the way he spoke was still very flirty and daring. Like he was saying all the right things like he called, oh gosh, he would call me pretty lady and I hate that. I just hate those two words now, but he would call me pretty lady with every sentence he said and for some reason that like I was like, oh, you were just in the bathroom for so long and I was so annoyed. But then you came out and you said this nice little thing and you called me pretty lady with yet. No one has ever called me pretty lady. I don't know. Maybe it was the lady and it felt like, I don't know. It sounds silly that I'm saying it out loud, but it's pretty lady. It's good to hear the little things that made you Like flutter because it's easy looking back at these to be like, oh, he was gross But it's like no, you were you were falling for him and there's he was obviously doing many things aside from paying for stuff Like just his personality sounds like it was charming just really easy to talk to and I think I'm typically I can be quite reserved with guys and anxious to share my full personality a lot of the time because I am very Out there and outgoing when my full personality is showing and I think it can intimidate guys a lot of the time So I'm very used to holding back and with him immediately I felt like I could just be myself. I wasn't like thinking before I spoke. I was just letting myself be So I feel like that was a New and refreshing feeling that I was really attracted to with him So those things like calling me pretty lady and like being engaging in the conversation was new for me Unfortunately, but yeah, unfortunately It's really yeah, it is unfortunate. It's really sad actually But yeah, his energy was definitely different, but still his words were really good and he wasn't not Showing up in all those ways like he's like making sure like if there's something I wanted to eat or if I was hungry He's checking in on those things like making sure I was as comfortable as possible without really caring about the environment We were in and then again, same thing happened Sunday rolled around It was time for me to leave and he had the same excuse and this time I was a lot more hesitant I didn't really want to leave the car with him I especially because I was noticing those few things in his apartment like the long trips with the bathroom the casino I was just like I don't know if I should be doing this, but I was like in this really awkward situation in my head like Kind of that like people pleasing mindset of I Don't want to upset you because I am so interested and intrigued with like continuing to get to know you even though There's been these like few things that I'm unsure about and I don't know if me Saying no or putting my foot down will like intervene with that and then fortunately I didn't follow my gut And I let him keep the car again. How did he specifically ask you if he could keep the car? It was the exact same way he was like Do you think I could keep the car for this extra week? I have this this and this my son has this football game on this day that I'm gonna take him to and I could really use the car for that And he would always say if not it's okay I can ask my mom or my sister to help me out, but then I don't know I wanted again like to be helpful for him. I wanted to see where the relationship would go And so I said yes because I felt like It was the best decision in terms of the relationship probably not the best decision for me myself personally, but yeah And he's still paying you back for it. Yeah, so will this extension he paid yes this is the second extension He he paid for the first booking the first extension and then this is the second extension Which he did pay for he sent me the money right away before I had left I think if he hadn't maybe I wouldn't have left the car I would have ensured that I had the money or it was returned But he gave me the money and then I left This time around when I left Communication is a lot worse like days without responding to me. Oh Responding and I'm like and he has the car and you know he's on his phone all the time And yeah, he's on his phone all the time because I saw him on his phone And I sent that to him to our member in our text conversations. I was just like is everything okay? Because you were on your phone when we were together, so I just I don't understand why you can't respond and he's like I'm so sorry. I was doing this with my it always was tied to his family members in hindsight I'm like thinking how he always tied when he wasn't responsive to being with his sons or like out of football Gamer out of basketball game and so how can I argue that or continue being upset when he's like well I'm so sorry. I was with my son. I can't be like too bad Like you can't ask yeah, I'm his full attention in that regard totally makes you the bad guy. Yeah I love that this podcast is brought to you by quince because I'm all about finding the best pieces that are ones you wear On repeat. I'm not a one and done person. I want some uncomfortable versatile and somehow right for almost every occasion at quince They make elevated essentials using premium materials like European linen organic cotton washable silk Without the traditional retail markup seriously. This is the first place I go to get Basics by mom loves to shop there. My dad loves to shop there. 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I'm getting panicked less about the relationship at this point and more about the car because I'm like oh shit This thing needs to be returned He's not responding enough to even feel like I can make plans to go back for another visit to go return the car Even so I'm getting nervous and I'm telling him like It's okay like I mean it's like if you're not interested in me anymore That's okay, but we need to return the car like we have to we have to figure out the rental and he like no Oh my gosh, I can't believe you would think that of course. I still like you. I'm so just and busy like All these things are going on. I 100% still want to see you. Let me know what days work for you And then I would tell him and then again, he would go two or three days without responding And then the time came with that the car needed to be returned and I was not hearing from him So This car company starts reaching out to me. They're like your car is overdue. You either need to extend your rental or return the vehicle And so I'm telling him that but then I'm not getting the straightforward response You're telling me he'll take care of it or he'll book me a trip to come see him and make him return it But I'm just like I don't want anything to go wrong with this rental So I quietly extend the rental online myself and I don't tell him I tell him that it's still overdue and that we need to return the car But so that I don't get linked with the crazy fee I'm just going to quickly extend it and make sure he pays me that when when he pays me In general for whatever remaining balance there is He again keeps just giving me the run around that he's going to return it or he's handled it or he's working on it He's handling it and then I'm like okay What about the fee for the extra days that it's not been returned for he's like I'll send it to you Don't worry. It's not a dollar. We'll touch your account of your own money. I promise you I just kept thinking like why would you leave that car with him like Why did you think that that was okay? Why like what if he's been in an accident with it? What if the car has been damaged? Like I have no clue what's even happened with this car like all the bad Possibility started rushing through my head of like when I'm not hearing from him and the car companies reaching out to me saying That they need the car back. I'm like oh my gosh. Did he get pulled over and they saw that his license was suspended and he's in jail or did he? You know wreck the car and like ditch it somewhere did he give it to somebody else to drive and that's why he can't return it And he's giving me the right like every possible outcome or other situation that it could have been Grand through my head and I was just honestly pretty down on myself like my two friends who I was with they heard the thoughts that I had where I was just like I'm such an idiot for that like I can't believe and I don't feel this way now But like in that moment I was like oh maybe I do somewhat feel this way now, but I really heavily felt like I was really really really stupid honestly for just Getting myself into that situation to begin with and I felt a lot of shame I didn't tell anybody besides the two friends that were had met him for the longest time Didn't tell my mom didn't tell my family I didn't tell anybody because I was afraid of what they would say or like the tough love that they would give me I just felt like super ashamed and disappointed in myself because I am smarter than that and I know that I'm smarter than that And I know that leaving a rental car with just leaving a rental car even with somebody with a license that's on your credit card Isn't the wisest choice for them adding on the layer of the fact that I knew his license was suspended definitely uh Wasn't my sharpest moment and I think I was feeling a lot of that at the time And so Time's going by the time that I extended it to surpasses and I'm getting more text messages from the car company saying that I need to return it And then eventually I get a letter from them and the email saying this is very overdue You have to return the car otherwise it will be repossessed and you'll get charged to repossession fee In addition, you may be banned from renting further with us ban from our company And so I sent him that thinking if he sees this surely he's gonna get it together and return this car and work with me here And he tells me that he's he's returned it and so my okay Maybe like they like you know, maybe their system like auto-sense it I don't know again. I'm like making it more sense in my house It wasn't the whole thing that if he returns it without you, you're gonna get another penalty So he's I know well then he said that there's like after hour shop off where you can leave it in the parking lot with the keys inside and lock the vehicle And I'm just like why don't you tell me that we did that before but obviously now I'm like oh because you wanted to keep using the car So he tells me he's returned it he told me that he handled it with his sister Also, he's not responsive us in the relationship aspect of this when I feel like it's important to highlight like we were Obviously just communicating about the car because he was barely even communicating about that So he was kind of ghosting a little bit with the exception of the car He was looking ghosting me even about the car, but then I don't know I guess felt some moral battle to get back to me about the car. I don't even know why he chose to I don't know I'm very confused even now that Less pretty lady conversation. Well, no. he is still like in all his messages calling me pretty lady being flirty being like I've handled it don't worry and being flirty but I'm not I'm just like okay we need to deal with this all of my communication became more straightforward just about the car and I was less I didn't I didn't want to see him anymore at that point there was a point when I was like waiting for the money or asking him for the money for that last extension that I was being kinder just still kind of see if I could get some give from him but no he was like definitely trying to ghost me I think until I was like they're gonna repossess the car and then he said he handled it and so yeah he says he returns it few days goes on I'm not hearing from them either which isn't very important to know he said he returned it I didn't get any more phone calls from them no email follow-ups nothing so I was like okay like he he probably returned it and I was checking my credit card statement for the final charge now thinking through yet which I was like hmm I feel like they would have charged me if you returned it but I don't know I also hadn't really rented cars before this I'm not familiar with the whole process or how the billing goes at the end but all signs seem to say that he did return the car and so I'm relaxing a little bit and I remember vividly I was sitting right here actually in this exact spot getting ready to go to my friends house for our friends miss and then I get a phone call from a LA number and I thought maybe this is him maybe he got a new phone maybe that's why he's not being so responsive maybe he changed his number I don't know so I pick up the phone call thinking it's gonna be him and it's someone saying oh hi this is so-and-so from this towing company I've been sent from first to repossess the car oh my god if you can't it's okay like we can get in without the key but then you will get charged for like a key replacement fee and I'm like been lying there's no way there is no way and so I have to tell the guy the truth I'm like sir I'm so sorry unfortunately I'm not there I did let somebody else drive the car let me try to call him and see if he can come down and give me the key can you please send me a photo of where you're at with the car as well because I was like I need evidence for where this was found because he told me I returned it and so I text him and I was like what are you doing you didn't return the car you liar their downstairs right now repossessing the car he doesn't respond at first I'm blowing up his phone he's not answering and then finally he texted and he's like it's done I handled it and I was like you're lying like they they're repossessing it right now this is not handling it having to get to a point of repossession is not handling it you lied to me you told me that you returned it you didn't return it and so I was like you need to call me back if I need an explanation for this and I also need to know how you plan on repaying the rest of this because that was like a full week at least since he told me he returned it so there was all that overage that was being charged to my card and he was like yeah I'll call you back I'm at my son's basketball game of course he didn't call me back and then I finally get the final charge getting my statement they charged me 5,000 for this card because not he did he not return it when he said he did so I paid for the extra extension that was one bill that he didn't pay for yet because I did that without him even knowing so that I would thought I would be protected then the final charge for all those extra days added on all of the toll charges he incurred that I was not even aware about during charges oh I was taking tolls he was taking the fast lane I think everywhere he could because there was $500 just in toll fees oh my god so I get a huge charge also banned from her since while they let me know that I'm banned and what I didn't know is the tolls you also pay separately so there's the charge and then you have to manually like pay that toll fee yourself otherwise they charge interest I couldn't let that happen so I paid it for him so that I wasn't getting charged interest and then added that to the balance that he owed me I start texting him for the payment he is telling me he's gonna send it he's just sorting out the account to send it from and so I give him like two or three days and then I follow up and he says that his Venmo account is locked because of a transaction that he did that got flagged but that he's like talking to their like resolution team and they're going to be unlocking it it's no problem oh and then he says that they tell him it's not going to be unlocked for the next amount of weeks and I was like that doesn't work for me my credit card bill is due in 20 days max like that we got cash we got wires we got options to figure this out but he says that that's his only way he can send it and that it's locked and so I'm like okay I don't know I didn't know what I could do in that situation is besides just like hope for the best that he's gonna send it to me and keep following up on it so I keep following up on it and he's giving me the run around just telling me like you know he's still waiting for it to get unlocked then the day comes that it's supposed to be unlocked and he's telling me that he is waiting for a deposit then and the story's changing and this is all text messages so I'm seeing him get caught up in these lies of like what's actually happening with the payment and so I'm telling him but you first you said it was your account was locked and now you're saying you're waiting for this deposit I just really want to make sure that I get this money like my credit card bills do at this time I really don't want to have to pay the interest it's giving me a lot of anxiety they're making me really anxious and also he's still trying to call me pretty lady and flirt through all of this and I'm telling him like I'm not like you need bro please and then finally there comes a day where I get a little bit less kind and I'm just like listen like I need you to send me this money if you don't send me this money I'm gonna post you in the local are we dating the same guy group and warn people about you and he gets really defensive he's like I told you you would not be paying a penny for this I'm gonna send you the money I just need you to be patient I'm being honest with you I'm just trying to figure out like this this and this and I'm like it just doesn't feel that way you need to put yourself in my shoes and the understand that I just got charged this large sum of money they're not responsive and it's really hard to believe you and he's like I know I can totally understand why you feel that way but I'm telling you I am gonna pay for it I'm just figuring this out I can't control that this thing got locked or this and this and I was just like okay you keep saying that but yeah I did get charged for it so even though you still say that I'm not gonna be paying for it I feel like I'm paying for it right now and he just keeps telling me to be patient and then I was like okay I need you to promise me consistent communication I want daily check-ins on the status of all of this because like the only way I'm gonna feel like somewhat okay and he agrees to it but then goes four days without responding so on the fourth day I said I'm posting in the are we getting the same guy group and at this point I'm like okay if I post him I'm probably not he's not repaying me like the after I post this but at least I can let people know what he did to me and warn girls in his area in LA wow so I write up my post I follow all the group guidelines I posted anonymously because they have the feature where you can post anonymously for your protection in these groups and so I posted anonymously I kept it as detailed but also as vague as possible that makes sense like all the details about what he did wrong but vague yeah yeah who I am and at first no comments came through for hours and I was really anxious after I posted it too because I was just like it's always scary posting in one of those groups and finding out what this man could possibly be and then I see that I got a notification and oh my gosh the first one was actually the craziest one too the first comment was an anonymous comment and it was someone saying I was dealing with him during this time period he ended up scamming me as well by running up charges on my after pay account and then leaving me with the bill and not paying me for it and then they oh my god it was interesting it's in their comment they were like yeah I had a suspicious charge for the airline that my friend flew home with from Vegas or sorry she flew from Utah but the airline that she flew back from there was a charge for the new flight he booked her and I immediately was like oh my gosh my heart sunk to my stomach at that point I was like oh gosh all of this was alive like none of this was what I thought it was immediately all of those red flags that I didn't see before we're just coming right front and center and I was seeing all of it I was like oh my gosh if that flight was charged on her card who paid for the toiletries who paid for the hotel like we really wasn't sorry so you're saying that this person who commented on the Facebook post says I got a charge from another airline and you recognize that airline as the one he said he bought for your friend so he used this person's credit card oh my gosh exactly that so I commented back to her and I was just like girl if I comment my phone number will you please text me because I know exactly what that airline charge is from and so she does I comment my phone number very fast she texts me I delete my phone number off of the thread and I start talking to this girl and she's telling me her story and she's saying how they were dating he dipped off in communication around September which is exactly when I met him in Vegas and she tells me that they were dating she was really enjoying getting to know him they're both parents and she's a single mom so they really bonded over that that mutual connection of having young children and I guess when she was explaining it to me she said that they were hanging out one day he was trying to buy something and something went wrong with his account and he was asking her hey do you think you could put this on your card and I'll send you the payments right away but my account is just not letting me do it and I guess she was feeling the same way as me of like you know things were so good I don't know I can't speak for her but the way she said it was like things were good she felt comfortable doing so he gave her the money for that first charge. Clarna is the thing just in case somebody doesn't know Clarna is that thing yeah so like if I can't afford the sweater I'll pay it in quarter it's $200 yeah you could do like $50 every two weeks or whatever okay keep going. So she let's make that purchase and then the relationship continues progressing he ends up getting access to the after pay account and making further purchases and from what she told me in the beginning similar to my situation he was sending her the money right away so she felt comfortable until it got to the point where he wasn't sending the money right away and so as we're discussing she's telling me more about the charges and it is more of the charges that I knew were from us like the hotels and the toiletries on her card but then more comments are to come in on the Facebook post while I'm talking to her unlike rambling all of that more comments come in about other women who he did the exact same thing with Klerna and after P.A. Cal. Oh my god. And I'm just wanting to do the same way just like please will you reach out to me and unfortunately a lot of the girls were saying how they've left that chapter behind them. It was too draining and too exhausting to try to deal with with him. And that definitely made my heart sink even further because I was like yeah, these girls went through this and it got to a point where they just couldn't even do it anymore. Then oh gosh, like what am I getting into now? I was really upset obviously reading all that. I respected them. I let them know like that's what we find if you change your mind. I would really love to hear from you more because I'm trying to connect all these dots now and figure this all out. But despite that, even just hearing from this one girl, I was like this isn't up to no as seeing those comments is enough to know that you are a serial scammer. Like you're doing this to people. He's the after pay asshole. That's a good way to put it. That's my name for him. It was really devastating honestly because I am a lover girl and so I really did like him a lot. At first, I couldn't even process those feelings because I was so worried about the financial aspect of it and about like just getting the car sorted and the car bill. But then when you know these other girls started to comment to the timelines or kind of overlapping, I was like oh damn, not only did you scam me and not return this car but you also lied to me about all these other things. And so I don't even know how much of this was real. And honestly, I just felt like yeah, devastating. Like my heart just felt broken. Honestly, I wasn't I did not love the guy. I wasn't at that point, but I was really, really interested in him and I really liked him. And I opened up to him a lot about my childhood and my life. And I told him why I wasn't in relationship for so long. Like I opened up about all those things. And so it just sucked because I wouldn't have like to share those details with him. It also sucked because like I finally found someone who I could see consistently and also for being single for so long and then and that wasn't like I was casually dating in between either. Like I was damn near celibate, not fully, but I was basically celibate the whole time. And so finally meeting somebody that I felt comfortable sharing my body with and my emotions with and my history, my story, my childhood with. And then losing all that and finding out that it wasn't even really real to begin with. And that I also don't have that person that I can go see anymore, just really sucked. Like it just the money aside, I was like damn, I was really excited to have a little boot to go see and have sleepovers with and keep getting to know and then it went back to like, okay, great. Now I was just feeling ready enough to date again, found you and now I'm straight back to my thanks a lot. Yeah, I think a lot for running my life again. So do you really know I ruined my progress? But then he finds out about the post. So no, who told him, oh my god, someone's not a girl's girl. No, those groups, I could, I could, I could have a whole podcast on just how I feel about those groups. Honestly, after the fact they're not great as people think that they are, they're not what I thought that they were. We've definitely heard stories from people that say like, yeah, obviously they helped in some ways and then hurt in other ways. If you want, I know you have, we don't have a separate episode, but what do you mean? Like what was bad about them for you? I, in the end, got banned for sharing a story about him on there. They fully removed my access to protect women in his actual area. Like, I posted it on my TikTok and like, you know, I'm talking about it with you guys and I'm doing what I can to spread awareness about him, but being in that local group that he lives in would be the best way to spread awareness about him to make sure that women can see his face and know what he's done. But yeah, they banned me and the reason is because I mentioned the group's existence in my TikTok when I talked about this. I didn't say anything bad. I just said, oh, I posted about him. Just like I'm telling you guys, I posted about that. That's crazy. So you mentioned that you posted it on TikTok and they were like, you can't do that. Geez. Because they wouldn't be allowed in these groups. Would we talk about it all the time? Yeah, no, they were like, you can only talk about the group's existence outside of the group if you're defending it. If you don't talk about finding the group, there's one rule about fight club. You don't talk about fight club. You don't talk about it pretty much. Which like I get it, they want to keep the group safe, but let's be real. Everybody knows about those groups. So talking about their existence in the way that I was just by saying I posted it, I didn't think was that big of a deal. And I felt like, you know, you care more about your group's reputation than actually protecting the woman in this area from this harmful man who I have proven is very harmful. Okay. Then this group is maybe not what I thought it was. If anyone listening has been banned from are we dating the same guy, will you share your story and tell us why? I know I can't be the only one. Okay. So anyway, you're talking to these girls? Yeah. And then he finds out about the group. He texts me very vulgar words about how awful I am for posting him and how I should have just been patient. And he doesn't need to pay me back now because I posted him and I was like, no, no, no, no, you still owe me this money. Let's not forget that the money's to do with the car or not to do with your reputation or the Facebook group. He was going off on me saying that all I needed to do is be patient, trying to shift all the blame on to me and basically say that I don't need this money. If I'm going to be posting him, then all I need like I'm getting the attention I want and I was like, this isn't about attention. I'm seeing that you've done horrible things to other woman. Everything you paid for for me was on the dime of another woman. Yeah. I need you to just pay me back. But then also even as I was saying that to him, I was like, this feels wrong now because are you going to pay me back with one of these women's money? I don't even know how I go about this anymore because I don't know if I can trust where the money is coming from, but I also feel like I don't want to be out thousands of dollars. It was just a really shitty situation. He ends up saying, you know, if you delete the post, I'll send you the money right away. I don't really believe him, but in my head, I'm like, you know what? Let me follow this. Let me have it in writing. Kim is saying he's going to pay me as soon as I delete the post. I'll delete the post. Hopefully he just does it and this can just meet like, well, I was going to repost in regard. Listen to him at the time. I'm going to tell him, you know, we can leave this in the past and go forward. And so I delete the post. Of course, he doesn't send me the money. I wait a few days. I'm way too patient. I think that I should be, but I wait a few days, I give him a few days, give him the benefit of the doubt. He doesn't send me the money. So I post him again. When I post him again, my post just disappears. It gets reported or the admins deleted it. I don't know, but usually when your post get flagged and those groups, they give you a reason, a feedback reason for what group rule you broke. And there was nothing there. So I was like, weird, like, I don't know why my post is gone. So I post him again, and it gets removed again. And I'm like, weird, just so odd. I think that like, people, he knows people in those groups, for sure, who had to have been like, we're like, the post, fished his way into it. Honestly, I would not be surprised. Maybe all that time in the bathroom was who knows why plus getting in on the R.I. team, the same guy groups. But yeah, my post just keep getting removed. He's not sending the money. He is saying he's working on it. I don't have the post up. So he has no reason to say he's not paying me. We're on good terms. I put in air quotes because how good of terms could it really be in the situation? But he's saying he's still going to pay me. We're still in communication. So far, despite that initial conversation of him being very angry that I made that initial post, things have kind of simmered down. And he's again, back to saying he's going to pay me back. And there's no conversation of him being like, I want to see you again. Like, I miss you. Like, there's no. He did say at one point during that initial Facebook post and like that huge like conversation go into where he started off very vulgar and then simmered down as we agreed to delete it and impaying me. He did say he's like, it really sucks because like that you like, you think this of me like those those comments in that group aren't even true. It's just like people trying to bring me down. People from my past, you don't even know the full story. Like none of that is true. Lying to me about all of it. And saying it just really sucks because I really did like you and I really did like getting to know you. And I still like you and I just wish that like you could like all of us be patient to know that I wasn't trying to do anything like this to you. This isn't what it seems. I didn't know my account was going to get lost. And I think like this has ever happened to me. Start again, fall in thing is money saying like, I've never not had money. Like I've had millions before and oh god. I just couldn't have seen this coming. And I'm like, I really hope you know that like, I'm going to pay you back. And I'm just like, yeah, you keep saying that, but yet no payments have come my way. And so did you think he was going to pay you back at this point or were you kind of like, I just want to see what happens? I would say it was like 90% sure he wasn't going to pay me back, but 10% of like, I still want to hold on to hope because it's a lot of money. And I wanted it. So I feel like part of me was just trying to hang on to any of the remember of hope that he would pay me back. But majority of my mind knew that he wasn't going to pay me back. And even that 10% of the hope that he would was still conflicted with where was that fund coming from. And so then I lose my job. Of course, like right after I paid this large bill and he's like giving me the money around to pay me back, I lose my job, unfortunately. And so my income stopped obviously. And I let him know that I was like, honestly, busting into skies, but at the time it was very, very stressful because of that large charge and just everything going on. But let him know thinking maybe this will make him feel bad and he'll put a little bit more work into paying me back. No, not the case. He doesn't even acknowledge that message. Actually, it's one of the messages that he ignored. And then when he did eventually come back and say, sorry, I wouldn't risk the one I was going through this like I'm working on getting the funds for you, I would say like, you know, I literally told you I lost my job and you have no urgency to make this right. Like, I'm struggling here. And everything just stays the same, honestly, from like losing my job till around March. Communication stays just as horrible. Anytime he does communicate, he's doing the same exact excuse of he's working on it. He's doing this. He's getting it together. He's going to send it to me soon. He's never been this low in his life. And he's just trying to get out of this like, he said he was stuck between a rock and a hard place. That was his exact verbiage every single time. But he's never been stuck between a rock and a hard place like this before. And he's just doing what he can to get out of it. I'm on the top of his list to make things right and pay it back. And I'm just like, okay, I need this money. But again, still conflicting internally of, like, where is it? coming from and I really don't believe you're actually going to do it. But then, to my surprise, come March, it's my birthday and on my birthday, he sends me $300 out of what he owes me. Yeah, it was, it was, you know, it gave me more hope. It definitely made me feel like, okay, maybe he really was just going through something really bad. Like maybe he did never intend to do this. Sounds awful, but I was like, you know, maybe my situation was different because I did feel like the intentions in the beginning were good. The car was for a weekend. We did have that great weekend together. Maybe this did just end up in a sticky situation unintentionally and he didn't ever ask me to open a corner account. He never asked me to do anything like that. So I was telling myself, maybe I maybe I was different than these other girls who I hate that. But I was like, okay, maybe, because he just sent this $300. Maybe he really truly was trying to get it together. And he said that he'll send weekly payments at least $300 until it's all paid off. And I'm like, okay, sure, one week goes by. No further payment. Tells me that he is working on it. Again, just the exact same run around. And it's all like, okay, you're again, probably not going to pay me. I'm really not buying it. But I keep pushing forward. I really can't like dwell all day every day consistently, like begging him for this money. So I'm kind of trying to move on and not let go of it because I'm pretty stubborn and I don't want to let go of it. But try my best to keep moving forward without it letting just like letting it take over everything. Yeah. And then time keeps going on. I'm sending maybe a check in like once a week or maybe even two weeks, like I'm being really, really patient and lenient with it. But still not fully letting it go and letting him know that, hey, I'm still here and I'm still expecting this money. And then June 1st rolls around. Still no further payments by this point. There's not much to go on. How long ago is that trip where you first rented the car? Yeah, that was in September 2025. I'm doing math. Oh my god, wait, 2025. So June, June, like a month ago, June? Yeah, like last, last month, June 1st. I've received that one extra $300 payment besides the initial payments that he did give. And I sent him a message and I was like, listen, I need the money by June 15th. If I don't receive the rest of this payment by June 15th, I'm going to go all over the media with your name, your face, and exactly what you've done to me and these other women. I'm going to post it on every social media app that I have. I'm going to plaster your face everywhere to make sure that everybody knows what kind of luck that person you are. And I know that you're not going to pay me back after I do that. That's fine. But I'm going to make sure that you can't do this to anybody else. You have until June 15th. So I gave him just over two weeks to figure it out. He doesn't respond to that message. June 15th rolls around. He still hasn't responded. So I'm like, okay, and I didn't get any payments, obviously. Oh my god, right. I'm going to put it everywhere and I took a few days to process that internally. Like what that meant? I was going to be sharing and putting myself out there like that. And then I sat down and I recorded it for my TikTok and I told everybody what had happened. The TikTok did numbers, which I didn't expect my account. I don't know. I am not like, I do not have a lot of followers. I am not someone who has viral videos by any means. I had like one other video in my life that like went somewhere, but this one went somewhere fast. People are starting to reach out to me. What were people saying? You know, it was a mixed review. A lot of people were like, why are you telling us? Why aren't you telling the police? And I'm like, I did, but I'm not going to, you know, I don't need to tell that to the TikTok. That's yeah. You did tell the police. I want to hear. I did call them before the TikTok post, but it was pretty minor. I just called them told them that he did this and that I knew he was doing things to other women as well with their funds. But the police basically just said, this is a civil matter. We can't really do anything to help you. So good luck. And sorry, that happened, which is like annoying, but it's true. I mean, for my situation, unfortunately, I did willingly rent the car. So it wasn't a criminal matter. He didn't force me to a car rental place force me to sign a lease and like take the car, you know, you do any of that. But yeah, the TikTok response was mostly a lot of people saying why didn't you call the police? A lot of people telling to sue him. And then there was some people who knew him. There is a few people who were like, oh, I have them on Snapchat. He was Snapchatting me or I saw your post in the are we dating the same guy group? I was trying to look for it. There was one girl who told me that she was in communication with him and would casually hook up with him. But as soon as she saw my post on, are we dating the same guy completely stopped responding to him? And I was like, think I'd miss that. Oh my God. Stop if it's just one girl that I stopped from getting harmed from him. Then I've done as it's worth it here. Oh, I bet that felt really good. I mean, not good, but yeah, it was one of those alleged sword where you're like, I wish I didn't have to. Yeah, but I'm glad, because I just, you know, if someone had posted about him prior to me being involved, maybe I wouldn't have had to go through this. So I'm really glad that I could share my experience and prevent that. I could try to pursue civil law as well and try to go to small claims court, but I don't know. I don't want to go through that process. Who wants to go through that process? They don't have to. I thought maybe he would send it by posting. And also, I knew that going through civil law and going through small claims court, from my understanding is they garnish wages from somebody and he wasn't working a job that he can garnish wages from. He was selling appliances on his own. So I was like, what's the point in dragging myself through all of that for like basically the same outcome in my mind. And it's still something that I am thinking about and I have talked with attorneys. And I'm still on my mind as a possible option, but I don't know, honestly, the ticket was cost more than it's worth it might. And I don't want to spend any more money on him or the situation rather. So, B.I. Post that TikTok, it gains lots of traction. The first day that I posted it, he responded. So it was June 18th. And he texts me, which is such a coincidence. He does text me, but he text me as if he hasn't seen it or like he doesn't know that I posted it as if nothing happened. He was just like, Hey, I know it's been a while. I'm not going to give you excuses or give you the run around, but I almost have it together and I'm going to send you some money soon. And in my mind, I don't even respond to his text message because I'm like, don't believe you. I think you're just trying to save face because you saw my TikTok video and you're trying to be a lot less aggressive with your response so that it seems like you're the nice guy and you're trying to make this right and you were never trying to do all of that. But when he responded to the Facebook post, it was a lot less kind. And so I was like, my wonder. So he responds nice at first. And then all of a sudden he hits me with, you've got to be kidding me. You posted the. I hope you got the attention you wanted. He said, I can't believe I ever messed with a bitch with no home training like you. Why? Because I posted him this guy. We would know. Wait, that's so. This freaking guy. He called me a suicide bomber who would rather blow up everybody else's shit than just be patient and deal with it on my own. Oh my god. You mean you don't want me to raise awareness for the bullshit you're doing. That's what you don't want other women to know because then who are you going to scam next? You're right. It does blow up his whole plan. And that was the goal. That was like, if you're not going to pay me, I just need to make sure you can't do this to other woman. And I kept telling you that to you. I was like, if you think I'm doing this for attention, then that speaks to who you are. And we're going back and forth. It's him constantly just in different words telling me that I should have been more patient. All I needed to do was be patient. I'm like six months is patient. I don't know how much more patients you expect from me. I lost my job. I paid the bill. I paid the tolls. Like I have been patient. I've gone weeks without even following up with you and giving you time and space. Like I've been patient. You need to just figure this out. Get a real job. And he says, I would I will if it's something I think I need to do. I'm like, when you owe this money, people money, it should be the first thing you feel like you need to do. And then time passes the TikToks up. It's going around. He tells me that it's only fair for him to pay me back if I delete the TikTok. I said, nope, I fell for that before. You told me that when I had the first Facebook post in January. And you still haven't paid me back to him since. So why would I believe that you're going to pay me back if I delete this TikTok? I'm not deleting the TikTok. When you pay me back, then we can discuss the potential removal of my video. Thank you. Yes. Only if and when I receive my money up until then that video is staying up and I'll post more as well. So then I get a comment on it that says, OMG, not my baby daddy. Not my baby daddy. What? Baby mama unlocked. So I messaged the baby mama. And I was like, Hey, I don't know what your relationship with him is like, I don't know if you guys are on good terms, but I could really use your help with some things. And she's like, I don't like to get involved with his girlfriend drama. And I don't know how much I could help you to be friends. Like he owes me a lot of child support. So that's my main concern over with me. Oh, other women. And I was like, that's so interesting. I'm so sorry to hear that because he made it seem like he was such a present great father. And I would assume he'd pay his child support. She's like, he said he was a present father. No, no, no, not not at all. And I was like, that's crazy. She's like, what did he tell you? And I was like, Oh, he always told me he was at his son's football games at his best football games. Doing all these things for his son buying him gifts. She was like buying him gifts. He's bought him one pair of shoes in the past year. And that's about it. And I'm like, Oh, I saw him buying jackets and clothes and like all these types of things. Like did he just return all those things after? And he was just trying to flex possibly. She's like, No, he got one pair of shoes max. And he's not received anything else from his father at this whole time. She even told me that the other child swims, but doesn't do other sports, but that he has never gone to his other sons to women practices or anything to do with his other son. So she was like, I don't know how much I could help you honestly. I was like, Oh, I'm not like expecting you to ask him to give me the money. But if you could help you get his new address, that's all I really need. So that if I do decide to serve him to take him to court, I need that address. And she said she doesn't know it because he was recently evicted, but said if she gets access to his new address, she'll give it to me. So that was the last conversation I had with her. I don't really want to bug her about it, but when she comes to me with the address, and maybe I can take him to small claims court with that, but coincidentally, the day that she messaged me, he also came back out and he would really, really rude asking me again to tell me to leave these posts, calling me all the names in the book again. At that point, I'm just like, I don't want to deal with you. You have to pay me back this money regardless. Like, I don't know how to get that through your head. And so I ended up sending him a formal demand letter through text because they don't have his address stating, this is what you owe me. This is why you've acknowledged that you owe me it. This is a formal demand letter for payment before I do take whatever legal action I can. And I sent that to him with the total of the bottom, my PayPal link, and then I blocked him because I was just like, I don't, I don't want to go back and forth just to say the same thing over and over and over again. It's draining. It's very draining. And I know that that's what you're trying to do. Like, now that I'm like processing it all and I've gotten all this information, I know that you're trying to frustrate me and entire me and exhaust me of the situation to the point where I just let it go, but he met his mother fucking match. And that's not going to happen because I'm not letting this go. Hey, man, I'm just kind of wearing this about this because it's just, it's disgusting. Like, you have children whose mothers are struggling because at your hands, you've made another mother, single mother, who maybe not your baby mother, but she's a single mom and you make her make her struggle at your hands. I have my, I have my fur babies and I'm struggling at your hands. It's just disgusting. So I blocked him and obviously, he can't reach out to me anymore. And then I post him on my Instagram. And this is the one I did last because it was honestly the one I was most scared of just because Instagram is more personal. I feel like it's more people that I actually know in real life TikTok. Like the algorithm can just take it away and do it at pleases. It's not really so many people from my personal life, but Instagram. Yeah. It was kind of like my last one that was going to be a little bit more personal. So I did post on my Instagram and the friend, his friend, who my friend knew the one that we met originally in Vegas. We follow each other on Instagram. So I knew that he was going to see that and he did. And he directly himself did not reach out to me, but he had a bunch of his friends and his brother all harassed me, calling me all these friends and names saying that I shouldn't be using them to begin with. I'll attention seeking and just like all these things. I'm just like blocking them because I'm not, I'm not going to deal with it, but mostly a positive response. He's locked. So I have no idea what he's saying or trying to say or wants to say, but posted it there and then did reach out to his mother as well. Because like anything I can do at this point, I want to do it. So I reach out to his mom. Wow. How did you reach out to her? And what platform? What did you say? I need it all. I Facebook message to her. Facebook message. That's the way to. Yeah, I Facebook message to her. And I was honestly so polite to when we're successful, even though I wanted to be like, your fuckass son is so fucked and like, you need to figure this out. I was just like, hey, like I want to talk to you know, fuckass. Yeah, what your son, you know, the situation with your son here, like he owes me this much money for this reason. I also know that there's a few other women that he has some wrongdoings to correct with. It's not your responsibility, but I'm really hoping you can encourage him to make this right. Because I really don't want to have to take this further than it is. So I would really appreciate if you could talk to him, try to talk some sense into him. She locked me. No response. No. I'm sure he's lying lying up his butt to all these people saying. Yeah. Who knows why she's lying. Yeah, I have all the proof. I have all the receipt. It's all but either way, she blocks me and I think it's mostly because she's benefiting off of it. Another reason that I found him attractive in the beginning is because he was uplifting the woman in his life and speaking so highly about his mom and his sisters and how their father was a presence. So he was really the man of the family. And since a young age, he was taking care of them. Like you got a sister car for her birthday and he pays his mom's phone bill every month. So in my mind, after she blocked me, I was like, oh, you benefit off of it. His scamming is paying your bills. So of course you're not going to tell him to stop. You're going to keep enabling it because you want to keep benefiting off of it. So yeah, she blocked me. I blocked all these friends who are harassing me. And because where it's at now, is like, he's blocked. My post is up and honestly going through another resurgence these past couple days. So even more people are seeing it and finding out about him. And I'm sure you'll get more and more stories about him. Unfortunately, I think I will. I think I'm just crushing the surface because I feel like if you've been able to successfully do this with the woman that I do know about, there it has to be so much more than what I can see. There's no way that it's just that. And it's just a fluke that you were able to successfully scam these for and me. And there's no one else. Like there has to be more. But yeah, that was my experience with him still out about $3,000. I'm so sorry. What a, it's so shitty. I wanted to say like there's so when someone asked you to borrow money and you loan it to them and they use it for something different than what they said they were going to use it for that to crime, right? That's an arrestable offense. Okay, I don't know how much it'll hold up, but whatever. It's still a crime. I wonder if the rental car thing is along the same lines. Like, but I mean, I guess I see your point to like, if you rented the car and then let him drive it, I guess, I don't know. Ah, just sucks. Like, that's okay. Yeah, he didn't technically steal money from you. So from my understanding, because I did call a few attorneys in his area, I thought it was my free consultations as I could take and just see what my options were. And most of them are like, you could kind of go for him because you have writing, him acknowledging that he owes you that money. So it's less of like the car rental and the contract with the hurt, like none of that, but more so you have a contract with him and writing through text that he was responsible for paying you for that. And so you could try to take him to small claims with that not so much like he stole the car or he didn't pay for the car to the rental company because I was responsible for the rental car company being paid and I paid it. So my responsibility was done. I did what I needed to do. His responsibility was to uphold the agreement he gave me of paying me back for that car rental. And so that is where I might have legal grounds, but then letting someone drive a car with a suspended license is also an offense. So man, I did make mistakes in all of this. I didn't make the best choices through all of this. I all because of being loved bombed and manipulated and fed these lies that I think most people who, you know, I'm a lover girl at my core. So I like to believe people when it comes to those types of things. I want to give people the benefit of the dollar. I want to assume goodwill in all these people that I meet because why would I come out in a negative mindset, but unfortunately that led me to maybe not making the wisest choices, but I still think like you never deserve this. You can make. I don't think I did it all day long. It doesn't mean you deserve to be scammed like no. That's why we're constantly, you know, of course we get comments and I'm sure you've gotten comments on your TikTok that are like, well, you shouldn't have done XYZ. And it's like, yeah, we all shouldn't, I should have made my bed this morning, but like, it's okay. You make mistakes. You learn from them, but you're not malicious. And this guy is. And that's where, yeah, the line is so clear to me. 100% and yeah, a lot of people did comment stuff like that. They're like, you put yourself in this situation. What do you want us to do? And I'm like, I don't want anybody to do anything for me, besides maybe hit the repost button. If you feel like this would help people that follow you. That's all I'm really asking for when I posted. I'm not asking for someone to pay me. I'm not asking for any of that. I'm just looking to spread awareness about him because like, yeah, and I even said it in my video, I know I made mistakes. I know I didn't make the smartest choices. I know that there's things that in hindsight, I would never do now, but yeah, we all make those mistakes. And I'm not looking for anyone to fix this for me at all. I'm going to figure it out on my own, but I'm going to try to help the next girl out of it. Exactly. Exactly. Because I do wish that one of those other girls had posted about it because I was frequently searching that group, but I can't blame them either because now that I'm going through this, I see how draining it is and I understand how daunting it isn't even just like, I don't care that people know this now because it's out there for the world, but it was very exciting. When it first started to go viral, I'm not used to that and the thought of how many people saw what he did, then that's great, but also saw how silly my choices were. That does feel embarrassing and there is shame that goes with that, but I'm just trying to remind myself that the outcome of protecting other women is so much more worth it than like the amount of shame that I might feel from the choices that I made. But we should never feel shame around feeling like we're doing something for someone else. You know what I mean? And that's the problem is that we all feel like, like in the moment, you're like, Oh, good, you kind of feel like you're helping someone and you're taking care of them or doing something for them. But then at the end, only when we realize they're taking advantage of us, do we feel bad for it? And so the shame should never be around what you did and we should never feel dumb for it, but we do. We really do. And that sucks. I know. And it's so it's you're so right. Like it we shouldn't. And I don't know how to like not feel that feeling. I mean, as time passes, I feel less and less ashamed because I get more and more angry at the whole situation. And I'm like, no, I didn't even I was just doing what anyone would do and believing someone who's feeding you so much sparkle that's not even really there. Right. And it's not like he wasn't paying for stuff. He wasn't initially like, Hey, can you pay for dinner? I'll pay you back. He was paying for everything was paid for upfront anytime I came to see him. He paid for me to get there. Everything was paid for every little thing. You want grapes grapes are on the way on door. It actually everything. So I think a lot a lot of people fail to put themselves in. into the shoes or at least try to before they speak. And they think they wouldn't ever do that, but I also said the same thing. I have definitely watched people's story times online before. I'd been like, I would never do that, but I would. And I did. And everybody would and might fall for something stupid that they think they never would. Well, we always say the minute you start thinking that you couldn't fall for it is when you're the most vulnerable. Is when you're the most vulnerable? Yep. Yeah. And it's true. Looking back on that. So hindsight's 2020, as you've said. And you've already kind of mentioned this, but do you want to go through maybe some of the moments that in the moment felt so good. And now hindsight, you're able to be like, oh, that was this red flag, that was this red flag. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. Just to help you help the next girl is what you're trying to get to. I think if it seems too good to be true, it probably is like someone paying for every little thing like that. It can seem love bombing, right? And it can be really easy as I experience to get caught up in it and accept all of it. But I think if it seems too good to be true and it seems like something that's so out of the ordinary like that where they're paying for every single like paying for your friend's flight. I don't know. That was a bit much in hindsight. I wouldn't typically let someone do that. That's not the type of people we usually like, we like to put paper ourselves, do things for ourselves. I would have seen that as a more of a red flag, but like, why are you so willing to spend all this money on somebody you just met? I think also this not his apartment wasn't bad, but it wasn't the nicest and it was like, again, pretty messy. And I think anyone who had that much money would probably live somewhere a little bit nicer if their revenue or stream of income was from a reliable source. They probably wouldn't have such a dodgy. I don't know because it wasn't really that bad, but for the amount of money and spoiling he was doing, you would think he'd live somewhere a little bit nicer. So that was kind of maybe a red flag. Obviously, the broken car and suspended license was a huge one that I should have looked at and taken more seriously. Also, the texting being not great is something I should have not tolerated because I don't tolerate that with a lot of people. Like, my friends, if my friends don't text me back, I'm so quickly like, just what are you doing? No, absolutely. But I do think that there's two sides to this. I think we as women, not just women, but a lot of women are loud about how being a bad texture, quote, is BS now. But for a while, I really do think that we were made to feel either in directly or like we were too needy, we were insecure, we were asking for too much. And that if we're the cool girl, then we're chill, and we're not expecting them to text us back all the time. And we're not texting back all the time. You know, especially if he has a child or has multiple kids, I know me personally, I would be like, Oh, he's an adult. I need to act like an adult so he knows that I'm mature. You were there. You're like taking it right? I feel like I had that exact percenting said to my friends, I'm like, you know what, it's fine. I have to remember that he's got two kids. He's busy. Like, I can't expect him to be like, I don't have that. So I have more time. So of course, I want more communication, but he's busy. He's a dad. He's doing that. Like all the excuses. Well, I only know that you were feeling that way because it makes sense. It's not you were not an idiot. You were a human. Thank you. Appreciate that. I just want to reshare your TikTok to everybody. And also, I like, what does he have to now? Like, who's he scamming right now? Who's he buying a flight for right now? Take back what I'm wondering. I'm like, you're not texting me back and I know it's not because you're at sword games. I know that now. So it's probably because you're actively. And then even when he was talking, like, I'm working on it. I'm working on it. I'm like, I hate hearing that because to me, I hear I'm trying to get access to this girls after pay, like, hold on. And I'm like, no, I can get a job and pay me back that way. Please. But at this point, I think I, I'm just going to let go of getting the money from him because I really truly don't want that to come from another woman. Like, I would rather not get paid back, then get it from it potentially being from another woman's wallet. Like, I, I, I will be fine. I've made it this far without it. I, I'm going to be okay. It sucks because it would be really, really nice to have that money back right about now. But it is what it is. And at this point, I think, like, yeah, all I can really do is continue to spread awareness. And he might think that like, oh, I posted my TikTok, I've blocked him and it's going to fizz love. No, I will do as much as I can to keep talking about this. God damn Logan. Oh, Logan. I did you, but I didn't think about, you know, I know many people come on and say, I feel so stupid, but I didn't even think about the rental car thing. It's like, if I'm running a car, like, yeah, if you need to use it, like, whatever. She had, at that point, no real reason to be like, no, you cannot. Like, she's trying to be, to be nice and do the right thing. And it makes sense. I know that that got taken advantage of for anybody. Like, it's not that she knows that that was a mistake. You know, she was obviously very open about feeling like, oh, I would never do that again. But it's important to remember that we're allowed to make mistakes that does not mean we deserve to be abused and scammed and stolen from. It's just not her fault. So, yes, great cautionary tale in terms of being extra protective of your money and sharing things, but he paid for everything. He was such a gentleman and it was early on and she felt bad and he had sons and he played the game really well. Like, we were not in that conversation. We don't know how charming that man was and I imagine. And also, once he did the thing of paying for all the things in the beginning, that's that's the tone that he's not exactly broke. Like, he wouldn't, he's not someone who would take advantage. Like, he already paid for us for stuff. So if he wants me to put something on like his driver's license situation, then why not? You know, so for me, that wouldn't give me pause. I was thinking about it as we were listening because I was like, obviously hearing it in this context, I know that something bad is going to happen. And he was kind of giving me the egg how much he wanted to pay for everything. Yeah. And I realized, of course, I, there's a bare minimum of expecting. If you're in, I always think of it of like, who's pursuing who? So if you're in a gay relationship, there can still be somebody that's like pursuing, if you're into that. And whatever it is, like, there's usually somebody that you kind of are like, oh, they're pursuing me, they're paying for stuff. And at what point does it become an egg when they're insisting on paying for everything? At some point, I kind of want to be like, no, I got it. Like, yeah. Like, what's your goal here? Like, what's your motive? If somebody's too nice, I'm like, what's your motive? Yeah. I guess I'm kind of curious what people think. Like, if you went out with somebody that was just like, I never want you to pay for anything ever again, would you instantly be like, Princess Crown on Princess mode activated? I love it. Or would your guard go up? Because I think my guard would go up. And I hate that because I want to be spoiled. Damn the show. I know. Right? I know. The fact that he used his sons as an excuse all the time is always disgusting. I don't like that. I don't like that at all. Who surprised that she found out he was not paying child support and barely involved? No one. Not me. So yeah, the rental car thing was smart. I mean, he was like, oh, I'm going to put it back. Well, I mean, it's hard to know what an endgame is for these people, but I think she hit the nail on the head. He just wanted to keep dragging it out, keep wearing her down and exhausting her until she gave up. Yeah. No, that's exact. That's what that's exactly what I was thinking while she was telling that story. I'm like, he knows that there's no real recourse unless you go through the ringer. And he knows that he's not stupid. And can we also talk about the clarna and the afterpay these the finance like, so the clarna afterpay, I'm sure you guys know what it is, but it's basically a way to buy something and you can you can buy it back and you put it on finance. And it's just like, you know, however many dollars a week for every two weeks or whatever. And it's it's helpful if you really need it, but just like any credit, it can be a slippery slope. Yeah, I think the thing that people forget is the late fees stack up. It's there are sneaky service fees. Yeah. And it's like phantom debt. Like you're not always on top of it. It's just like a really I I'm so wary of it. But I mean, you learn by doing. It's definitely seems like a great idea. And so it's not. So I guess he just, yeah, he just got people roped into what he was doing. He knew it, paying for something. Well, because it didn't come out of their pocket right away. He knew that they wouldn't feel immediately impacted. So he could get more bang for his book because it wasn't affecting them right away. And by the time they did see it, he's moved on to someone else who could who he could steal from. Yep. And they yeah, are trying to get in contact with him. And obviously we know he was really good at avoiding that. And then they're left with it. It's so frustrating. It's so frustrating. My anxiety is too much. Like if I know that I did somebody wrong and they're texting me, like my heart starts racing as soon as soon as their name pops up. And I'm like, Oh God, like I get to I get to it. I don't know how they do that. That's so much anxiety. At least the benefit with afterpay stealing is that it doesn't does it affect your credit. I don't know if it does. It only negatively, but I don't think it positively like, no, it doesn't do anything to help you. Like if you're gonna buy something, you don't have the money for it. Do it at least on a credit card that is gonna help build your credit. But I don't think this finance programs actually help or I don't think they I do think that they affect your credit if you don't pay them back. Also, he was just running a Ponzi scheme. with other women. Yeah, like you would just take your money to pay for her Vegas trip and that was so frustrating and I said it in the episode, but I want to hear people's experience with are we dating the same guy? Because it's wonderful until it kicks people out. Well, they're really strict because of course there's there's a lot of liability, right? And there's a lot of chatter around it. And so are we dating the same guy? The creators of those groups can get in a lot of trouble if they're not careful. And so because they can get sued for libel slander. And so it's really important like they have super strict rules about posting and things that get like taken down and all this stuff. So it is kind of tricky, but if it's, I mean, they've been we've seen them be useful to other people. Remember that conference call with like 20 other girls. Yeah, when one episode and it was crazy, but even though she got kicked off, it was useful like it's still. Yeah, exactly. Sometimes I guess it's nice to have, but sometimes it can. The benefits outweigh the downsides, I think. I think so. I really do. And I think that although they have to be careful, like it did not not help, you know what I mean? Totally. But yeah, let us know what your experience has been with those. And if you have any dating dogfish diaries about, I'm trying to think of a D alliteration where that has to be money. Dollars, a dollar, stealing dogfish. I don't know, but I want to hear because he's got this. He's so snake like you so sneaky. Just be a while. Pay for this. I'll pay for that. And no one actually could, but that's the thing is I think over time he started learning that it would take more effort on their part to come after him. Then you know what I mean? And so I think he just, I think he totally took advantage of that. I'm proud of Rachel for sharing her story even though she felt shame around some of the mistakes she felt like she made. I hope we as an audience, I'm sure will be supportive and, you know, who among us has been perfect in the dating scene, especially if someone's gorgeous paying for everything, you know, sexy and I don't know what I'm saying. You know what I'm saying? Can I just say that our audience is so cool. Like you guys are so supportive of our guests and that you've just created such a cool community and a great safe place for these people. So I really applaud our audience. We have the best audience. Like you guys are so great. Thank you so much. Thank you so much. And that becomes more and more clear. The more I talk to people on Patreon and the more you meet them at live shows. So I really want to meet people at the Orlando and Tampa show because Chicago was just perfect. Oh my god. It was and and if you've never visited Chicago 10 out of 10 recommend it was so it was probably my new favorite city. There was so much to do. It was so cool. So thank you to everybody who came to our show again. We are so grateful. And please come see us in Tampa and Orlando. We love y'all. Send us your stories. Send us your comments and thoughts and support. And as always trust your intuition. [Music]