450. The Real Reason You're Burned Out (It's Not Just Your Schedule — It's Your Mind).

Are you struggling with overwhelm? Are you constantly feeling bombarded by life and all of the things you have to do and not quite sure how to get through it, how to keep going, how to deal with it in a healthy way? Well, you're not alone with that and we're gonna be talking today about some strategies to help you when you're feeling that overwhelmed feeling. Are you ready? Let's go. (upbeat music) Something inside you knows there is supposed to be more than this, more than going through the motions, more than the patterns you keep repeating no matter how hard you try. Hey, you're not broken. There's a root beneath it all and there's a path through it. Welcome to the Made Whole podcast where biblical wisdom and psychology meet to finally get you unstuck. Hi, I'm Brittany, a former therapist and someone who has sat in the same place you're sitting right now. You don't have to stay there. This is where you're made whole. The broken place has become beautiful and you finally come alive. (upbeat music) Hey, friends, so excited to be here with you. I, it's perfect this episode is about overwhelmed 'cause that's where I'm at. Actually, I'm feeling less overwhelmed in the moment, just more exhausted. It's been a week. I'm sure you could tell me all about yours and list all of the things that happened and you would be right there with me. But yeah, this, for me, it's just been a week. We dedicated our foster daughter to the Lord on Sunday and we then hosted a 40th year anniversary party for my parents on Monday and spent all day preparing. School started for us on Tuesday. I launched the, what we're calling currently, Freedom 2.0. It's essentially the Academy for the Church, the Academy that I run here, but making it, adapting it for the Church. I started that yesterday Wednesday. Today, the Academy launches for the, the Made Whole Academy. And then, let's see, that's today and then tomorrow is my son's birthday. Soccer starts on Saturday. I'm on stage for part of the time on Sunday and then it starts all over again on Monday. (laughs) Anyways, it's all good things. I'm not at all complaining. I truly feel so blessed. I feel like filled up and depleted all at the same time. Have you ever had those moments where you're just like, it's, you're just so happy and it's just so alive. Truly all of these things have made me so happy. So I love them all and I also feel so exhausted. So that's where we're at today. I hope you feel the same way. I know sometimes when we're overwhelmed though, it's not, it's not always joyful things. It also is things that you don't want to be doing or frustrating or bring grief or are just annoying. It can be a lot of things. And so I know it's not always like the overwhelm I have right now is a good kind of overwhelm in a sense that it's just all things I feel blessed by, but that's not always the case. And so wherever you find yourself, I hope that today just brings a little bit of encouragement, maybe just one little idea to help you get through this season and find yourself in a place more of peace. And I just wanna encourage you that if you're in a season of overwhelm, I think I talked about it in the last episode a little bit, but it shouldn't always be this way. We shouldn't always be in this state of overwhelm. Like the week that I have I'm having right now is one of the fullest weeks that maybe have ever had. I'm sure there's been other similar ones, but it's been a minute since it's been this intense, just every single day, just high capacity. And so, but we don't, I can't live here. This is kind of the peak I hope in the name of Jesus of how intense it's gonna get. And I'm hoping it'll still be intense for the next 10 weeks because I'm running continuously all of these things and more than that with school obviously. But I also know, starting things the first moment you have to get all these things established, it takes a little bit extra time. And so, yeah, but I can't always live here. So I just wanna encourage you that if you're in constantly a state of overwhelm, it might be time to assess your schedule. We talked about that in some prior episodes, so I won't go deep into it. But you need to make sure that you are giving your best yes and making sure that your schedule lines up with your values and you're not just always overloading yourself. So, I just wanna say that. But if you find yourself in a season of overwhelm, and it's just temporary, or you don't quite know how to change it yet, I just wanna share some more things. I started this in the last episode, but some more things that have helped me kind of get through these moments or seasons of overwhelm. And how do I manage it from a healthy place? And I honestly, like, even in with this week coming up, there's been a few moments where I did go into kind of a stress state and kind of let that really consume me for a few moments. But overall, I've just seen a lot of progress in myself, and this is not to suit my own horn. This is just to say, like, what we talk about here works, like the pain and peace cycle works. The, obviously, Jesus' work is following him and getting close to the Holy Spirit. It changes you, and so it's just been cool because I think normally in even times of even less pressure, I would lose it, lose my cool a lot. And I haven't really seen myself do that for the most part. And I would, you know, just be so anxious internally all of the time and just be consumed by that. And again, there's been a couple of moments where I've kind of felt that really, like, attention in my body. But it hasn't been constant. It's kind of been in moments where I'm like, okay, I literally have to get this done within the next hour. How is that possible? And that, those are when it kind of comes and then it fades afterwards. But in between, I'm not just thinking about all the things I need to do and how am I going to do it all for the whole day or the whole week or the whole month. I'm just kind of in the moment in present, which is one of the main things we're going to be talking about today. And so I sort of encourage you that wherever you're at, you don't have to stay in that place as you, if you keep doing the things that we talk about here, then you will begin to see change in your life. You're going to begin to see the fruit of that. And so just know that wherever you're at, you're not stuck. And if you need help with that, yes, join the academy. I mean, if you really want to join this round of the academy, there's some spots in our 10 a.m. call. You can join, yeah, at this point, you've only missed the introductory call. So you can let me know if you were going to be super last minute here. But we also launch again in January, which would be a great time. And then in the meantime, one, you can get signed up for the academy early and start doing all of the pre-work that is available to you, which also includes the unstuck workshops. So you can kind of get moving in this direction before we go live as a group. So that can be a great option for you. And then also if you just want to kind of dip your toe and without going all the way in, you can get the unstuck workshop and really begin figuring out how to use the four steps in your life to begin rewiring your brain and getting regulated and just changing your patterns. So all of that, all the information for the academy on the unstuck workshop is found at madeholdpath.com. So hope to see you over there. But the first thing I kind of want to dive into where I left off last episode is talking about boundaries. And this is one when I was thinking about overwhelm was so huge. Now, I kind of just mentioned the first kind of boundaries of the typical kind that we normally think of. And that is saying no to things and making sure that when we say yes to things that it's an alignment with our values and alignment with what God's calling us to in each season. And so that's a huge part of overwhelm is in a sense preventing it. But I was also thinking of boundaries in some different ways when it comes to overwhelm. And so I jotted a few kind of notes down about the how this shows up for me. So the first one that I want to talk about is if you have children, this applies to you. And if you don't, then we're going to get to some things that will. But if you have children, the first boundary that I think is helpful for overwhelm is making sure that your children are participating in the helping. I think it's so easy in our day and age with the culture of parenting to feel like you have to entertain your children and to not really expect much of them to allow them, not allow them, but I think we just see it in different way. We see it based on culture as we are to entertain them and take care of their every need and make sure every moment is filled with activities and stimulation and all of these things. And those aren't bad things, but that's not the lens we should view parenting in. And I'm not going to go deep into this today, but that is essentially a child-centric home where they are the center of the home. And that's not what God calls us to. We've got God calls us to a God-centric home where God is the center. And we are all serving Him together. And then from there goes our marriage and then out from that goes our children. Our children should not be at the center. They should be even beyond the marriage, that the marriage should be priority over that. And so we've just got to be careful how we're looking at things. But I think we also do a disservice to our children when we make them the center and we don't expect anything of them because now they start to believe that it's everyone else's job to entertain them and that they are the center of the universe. And I think children are already kind of born with that mentality. And so we've got to really teach them otherwise. And so when we can teach them that they're a part of a team and that they contribute to the team, they're not just takers from the team, but they're actually a part of the ecosystem of our home. And that's how the home functions. Then not only are we teaching them that value and they're going to learn to live that way as they go beyond in their life and become adults and they're gonna see themselves as someone that helps and not just takes, but it also helps you because you're not just cleaning up after them or just entertaining them. They are helping in that. Now I understand when they're young, sometimes it's actually more work to do this and it feels a lot easier just to do it for them, get it done. But. this in the long run will be helpful and it already starting to see my children actually, in some ways, be helpful. My seven-year-old knows how to do the dishes. Not all of them, like it's not perfect, but he knows how to do the dishes. They know how to clean out the car, because yeah, it gets messy pretty fast and we need to work on that. We've been trying to work on it and, you know, if I'm not reminding them every single day to take their trash out of the car, then that's what happens. Very quickly, it goes downhill, but when I say, "Okay, time to go clean out the car," they are able to go do that. They are able to help pick up the house and to get it back into a state of peace. I have to do some things still, but they're starting to actually be helpful. And this is something we're still working on. I'm actually not perfect at all of this, and I'm always trying to grow in this area because I can also tend to just do it for them, but setting that boundary of I'm not just going to default to me doing it all, but I'm actually going to ask for their help. And even with things like simple meals, sometimes when I've had to feed the baby, and we're kind of on a time crunch, I say, "Okay, we have leftovers in the fridge. You can go heat it up. You know how to use the microwave, you know, the seven-year-old, almost eight, can help his siblings to get their food." And, you know, I'm not saying that we do this every meal. We're still cooking and providing great meals for them, but sometimes in a time crunch for a meal here or there, then, you know, I can have them go and take charge of that if I'm having to take care of the baby or whatever's going on. And so we've got to set the boundary of not doing everything for them and actually having them participate in what's going on, okay? So that's one way that I was thinking about boundaries. Another boundary that I think can be helpful is asking for help. This one, I see it as kind of a boundary in that once again, we're not just assuming we're going to do it all, and we're just, yep, I've got this, I don't need anyone, I can do it on my own, and sure we can, we can do it on our own, but at what cost? You know, what are we losing when we try and do it all on our own? And, you know, there was a week where I was just really overwhelmed, oh, my husband was out of town, and it was my first week with all four kids alone, and having the newborn, and, you know, all the things that I'm doing. And I, my mother-in-law, just reached out to me to say, "Hey, just, you know, let us know if you need any help this week." And normally, I would kind of just say, "Oh, thank you," and move on with my life, and not really ask for anything specific, and if they reached out with a specific time, they wanted to take the kids and say, "Sure, but I wouldn't ask for anything." Not because they've ever told me not to, not because anything they've ever done, but because of me, because I like, "Well, I've got this, and I'm not going to ask for help." And this time, I was like, "You know what? I am going to ask." I was kind of overwhelmed because I'm not on top of the bottles, which my husband often helps with, you know, putting, and we have a bottle washer, which, this is my first experience of the bottle washer. It's great. Usually, I am nursing my babies, since I don't need a lot of bottles, and since anyways, I've just, I really love my bottle washer. I traveled for a bit a couple of months ago, and I didn't have my bottle washer, and I was really sad about it. It was, it was really sad to hand wash all the bottles. Anyways, first world problems, but anyways, he wasn't there to put the bottles in the washer, and so I was falling behind because I'm trying to manage all the things, and, you know, getting the flow of all four kids by myself. And so, I knew I just needed a couple hours to just bust some stuff out in the house, and my life would be so much better. And so, there was an afternoon, we didn't have anything, and I asked my mother-in-law if she could her and my father-in-law could take the kids for a couple hours. And they did, and it was the best two hours of my life. And I got so much done, and I got on top of things, and I felt so much less behind for the rest of the week, because I had those two hours. But if I hadn't have said anything, I wouldn't have gotten that. They offered, right? But I was like, "No, I'm not going to ask for anything." And so, anyways, that's a boundary that we can set as asking for help, whether it's from in-laws or a husband, or a friend, or a neighbor, or whoever it might be. We need to ask for help. And I know our pride gets in the way, and we feel like we've just got to do it all by ourselves, but it says nothing about you that actually says something good about you when you ask for help. It says that you aren't just living by pride, and that we are a team, and that's how God designed us, and really kind of our current culture and society fragments families so much that it feels like this crazy thing to ask for help sometimes. But that's not how it's meant to be. And if you don't have family around, that's what the church is for. That's what community is for. And if you don't have a church that you can call on, you're probably not invested enough in your church. You're probably not in groups and serving, because when you really dive in, there's going to be people in your corner that are going to be able to help you. Sometimes it takes some time to get that established, but that is something that will come from investing in community. So, ask for help, okay? The next thing about boundaries that really was huge for me is what I call mental boundaries. And this is where I am staying present to what is in front of me, okay? And I'm living in this moment with what I have before me, because I have all these different buckets, right? I have the marriage bucket and the kid bucket and the house bucket. Some of these buckets intersect with each other, obviously, but there's all these buckets. I have the work bucket. I have the ministry bucket. I have the friendship bucket. I have the different ministry buckets. You know, and so there's just all of these different things going on. And so if I was to look at all of the buckets at once, I would just be drowning constantly. I would not be able to breathe. I would not be able to keep going. But I've gotten really good at, in a sense, compartmentalizing, not in a bad sense where I'm ignoring all the other things, but that I'm in the moment, right? If I'm sitting here recording this with you, I can't be doing dishes at the same time. So why am I thinking about the dishes that need to be done? Or if I'm sitting here with you, I can't be plugging away at some ministry stuff that I need to, some admin work for ministry that I need to kind of get on top of that I'm behind on. I can't be doing it right now. I can only be in one place at one time. And if I allow my mind to be somewhere else that actually is going to make me less efficient, it's going to slow me down. I'm not going to do as good of work in whatever I'm doing. And so it works against me to do that. And so we've got to make sure that we are being where our feet are planted. If you've ever heard that, people say it, something like that. And so we've got to be exactly in the moment and not allow the other things to consume us. So when I'm with my kids, I'm not worried about work. Even if I have a huge deadline, unless I'm like about to step into work as my husband's about to be home in 10 minutes and I'm going to switch gears because he's taking the kids. And maybe then my mind is already starting to go there. But when I'm with the kids, I'm ignoring my emails. I'm ignoring the to-do list. I'm ignoring the deadlines that are screaming at me, even if I have to work late at night. They are, I'm with the kids. If I am working on my business, then I'm not worried about ministry. Now sometimes I kind of hop back and forth depending on the day. But when I am working, like I'm like, okay, we've got to get this done. I am focused, hyper focused on my business and named with the ministry when I'm working on ministry stuff. I'm hyper focused on that and I'm not worried about the business. And so you've got to do this when I'm resting. I'm not worried about work. I'm not even worried about the state of the house. I know that I need to rest when I'm going to bed at night. I'm not thinking about all the things I have to do. I'm like, oh, my job right now is to settle down my body and my mind and spirit to go to sleep. And so I'm taking care of myself, my teeth and my skin. I'm getting into bed and enjoying that moment. I'm reading a book. I'm not getting some extra things done on my phone. I'm not thinking about what I need to do the next day. I am present in that moment going to bed. Okay. When I am working, I'm not worried about the state of my house. So when I'm working and it's my time to work, I'm not thinking about the laundry and the dishes and cleaning. Those things do need to get done. And in this season, they haven't been as in the state I would like them to be. But I also know that if I worry about that while I'm working, I'm going to fail at working. So I've got to be present. I think I've driven the point home long enough. But these kind of mental boundaries will help you so much because sometimes with overwhelm, it just all comes flooding in at once. And you're thinking about a hundred different buckets and a hundred different things. And you can't do that all at once. And so you just need to know what bucket you're in and be present there. Okay. And making sure obviously that you're delegating enough time to each of those buckets. So, you know, that can create a problem if we're not investing enough time into our kids. And we don't even have a bucket for them because there's no time left. So I think, you know, you first have to make sure there's those buckets established throughout your day. I think the point that I'm at, I know my rhythms well enough of, okay, this is my work time. And this is the my kids time and etc. And so I am confident that time will come where I can be present in the kids or in the house or in the work or in the ministry, etc. And so I know that that's coming. And so I can be confident in that. So that's part of that. Okay. But we've got to do these boundaries. It's going to help so much. All right. Couple of things to help with overwhelm. I mean, along with this, I have another one that says don't worry about tomorrow. Just be present today. So same kind of concept, or we're not worrying about tomorrow's tasks for the things. But just today, what do I need to get done today? One day at a time, one minute at a time. And really trusting that if you have been stewarding your life well and obeying God and he's called you to something that he's going to give you the capacity and the time to do it. And that's something I've had to wrestle through in moments. Even this week trying to think, okay, can I really do this all? Am I going to get it done? And I keep going to the checklist of like, okay, am I called to this? Am I called to this? Did God confirm this? And each one was like, yes, yes, yes. And so here I am. And I'm like, okay. Okay, he's gonna sustain me through it. We're gonna get through it. And every time, he gets me through it. And I am also trying to think of how I can systemize things a little bit better, a lot of bit better. Systems, I love systems, but they're not easy. They don't come easy for me. I love the idea of them. I want to create them, I crave them. And we have some distance in place for sure, but I could get a lot more narrowed in on that. And so anyways, I need to establish that in order to create a little bit more margin. And I also know that God's gonna sustain me through this season. It's both end. So don't worry about tomorrow, prepare for tomorrow, but don't worry about tomorrow, just be planted and present in today. Easier said than done, which is why we need our four steps. We'll get there in a minute. I always got to talk about the four steps. Okay, some other strategies, some of these are so obvious, but we still got to talk about them. Praying. I know we know about this one, but are we doing it? When we are going throughout the day and it's a moment of just unbelievable overwhelm, are we just screaming or are we rolling into ourselves and curling up in a ball, whether physically or internally, are we numbing ourselves or are we turning to God and bringing it all to God and dumping it all on God and saying, God, I'm really struggling here. I need your help because when we don't bring it to God, I just heard someone describe prayer the other day as this way that we remind ourselves that we're offloading everything to God. It's not ours to carry, it's not our burden to bear, it's not ours to control. And so when we pray, yes, it also moves mountains and actual things change in the world. But it also is this reminder that it's not ours, that he's in control and we can trust him and we don't have to carry it alone. Yes, we have to walk things out faithfully. We have to do the actions and pick up the children and complete the assignments. And you know, but we're not doing that alone and it's not even by our own strength, it's by his strength. And so all throughout our day as we're hitting these moments of overwhelm instead of just curling up and falling into your pain cycle and coping with whatever you normally do, turn it in prayer to him. And it's gonna remind you that it's not yours to carry, okay? Also I have in my notes something about a 4 a.m prayer and this just goes to show you the season I'm in because it's just a couple weeks ago, I was waking up every day at 4 a.m. to feed a baby. And we're not anymore, but I don't know what I prayed exactly at 4 a.m. But I do know that it is a reminder that in those moments that are the hardest that he will sustain us 'cause I do know those moments of being so depleted and exhausted that I had to cry out to him. And so I'm sure there's something about that. But the next thing I want to talk about is open communication. So this kind of goes to boundaries but I think it's something that we need to make sure that we're doing is sometimes when we're overwhelmed, some of us tend just to internalize everything and hold it all tighter. It's kind of almost our way of controlling it. I know I do this sometimes when I'm extremely overwhelmed, I don't even want to talk about it to anyone. I don't want to speak words to anyone, including my husband. I just want to hold it all in. And this is a problem because it leaves us alone in the midst of everything. And we end up usually being rude to people as well, but then we're also just caring it by ourselves. And so we need to make sure that we are openly communicating to the people around us in our world, okay? Starting with, if you're married to with your husband, you need to let him in on what you're going through. You need to tell him what you're dealing with. And this helps so much for so many things. One, he's gonna be able to give you more grace and empathy because he understands what you're caring. Two, he can lend a hand with some things that you might not have realized could have been helpful before. And I've just noticed myself, you know, in the season as I've been overwhelmed with having a newborn again. And I think I normally would just try and power through it by myself and just figure it out or shut down 'cause I'm caught in my pain cycle. But this time I've just communicated it. And I've been like, hey, I'm really overwhelmed right now and this is where I'm at just so you know. And I still have moments where I kind of don't want to talk. But then in a moment where him and I are at peace, I'm sharing with him, hey, this is where I'm at right now. This is why there's some moments where I'm not able to kind of be as open and talkative or whatever it is as usual because I'm just so overwhelmed. And so then he knows what's going on. And so then that's when he, I think I shared this before, but he started washing all the bottles because I was telling him that I can't keep up with all of this. And I didn't even specifically ask him though, I should have probably, but he just started seeing that there was a need and started filling it because I communicated, okay? So we need to do this. This also goes to telling friends how we're feeling. I don't know if you ever have friends, you know, check in on a Sunday morning or at a text message and ask how we're doing. And sometimes we can just give the highlight reel and say we're doing good because overall, sure we are. Yeah, we are surviving. We are getting through. But are we really telling them like, hey, actually, could you pray for me? I'm just feeling a little overwhelmed this week. And I'm trying to manage it all. I'm doing okay, but I really, I really could use some prayer and fed some moments where I've just kind of hit the floor. So that's where I'm at. And our friends need to know they want to be checking in on us and praying for us and we need to let people know. It's like we're just, it's picture like we're just carrying this giant boulder on our backs. It's a giant boulder bigger than us. And we're just carrying it and there's like all these people along the path I'm picturing like a hiking moment and all these people along the path saying, oh, can I help with that? Let me help you carry that. That's so big. And those people genuinely want to. They would actually like to because then they get to be a part of something and get to help you. You know what it feels like to help someone. It feels great to help someone. And they really want to help. But we're like, no, no, I got it. I'm actually good. I actually kind of like this boulder. It feels great, you know? And we just kind of in our pride and our pain cycles, just keep carrying the boulder alone and convince them that we're actually totally fine when really we're about to die. The boulder is about to crush us and we're going to fall on our face and the dirt. And they're literally standing right there trying to help us and we're like, no, no, no, no. I got this. I'm totally fine. Totally fine. Look at my Sunday smile. And we just don't even communicate to people where we're at. And it's just such a sad thing because God made us for community. God made us so we carry the boulders together. And we were not meant to carry it alone. And it says nothing good about you that you carry it alone. It says nothing good. It says good when you ask for help. So, preaching to myself too, but we need to do this. And even talking to our kids a little bit about this. Now we don't want to overburden them and put it on them. But I found it helpful in times where I'm just a little bit overwhelmed and a week that I'm a little overwhelmed. I just kind of will say, hey, I'm sorry. I haven't quite been as present as normal. I'm just dealing with a lot of things and you are so much more important than this. But right now this is something this week, as there's a little intense. And so I know once we get to this week, it'll be a little bit lighter. But I just want you to know that I'm trying to be there as best as I can for you, but I'm a little overwhelmed. And so we're not like asking them to care for us, but we're just being open and communicating where they're at, where we're at because they can sense something. So let's just help them understand it. 'Cause if they sense something and we don't talk about it, they might decide, oh, well, maybe it's me that's the problem. Maybe my mom doesn't like being around me. Maybe, you know, 'cause they're sensing something different. And so let's help them understand that without burdening them with it, okay? So we need to openly communicate. Okay, the final thing, and I'm just going to barely touch on this 'cause we don't have time and you hear me say it all the time. But in order to go through a season, where there's a lot on our play and not be crushed by it, we've got to stay in a place of peace and not be in pain, okay? Pain, when we're in our pain cycle, it leads us to people pleasing, or perfectionism, or anxiety, or numbing, or all these things that we don't want to do, right? Isolating, but if we stay in a place of peace during these seasons of overwhelm, we can actually be present in each moment and actually enjoy the things that we have our hands to and actually see the fruit of it and feel the fruit of it. It might feel a little bit heavy and it might be a little exhausting. We're still gonna feel that, but we also can enjoy it. Like, this week is insane. But in each moment that we've had these things come up, I've been present in it and I haven't enjoyed it. I've had so much joy in it. Yes, I'm exhausted. But there's been so much joy. I'm not missing any of it because I'm present in it. And so make sure if you don't already have your four steps in place, your pain in your peace cycle that you learn that so that you can stay in that place of peace as well when everything is happening and it's all about to crush you and now you can know how to walk through it in peace. So join the academy, get the unstuck workshop, learn those things 'cause those tools would change your life. Let me just pray for you. God, I just thank you Lord for seasons. God, that stretch us. God, I thank you God. That in those seasons that stretch us, God, you're expanding our territory. God, you're expanding our capacity. God, you're bringing fruit from it. God, as long as we're not unwisely living. God, if we're just aligning our lives with you, God, you're bringing so much good from that God and it's pray for everyone that feels weary. God, that you would lift our spirits. God, you would help her just to communicate. And tell some people that she needs some help and to open her arms to that help. And I pray God that you would sustain her in the midst of it, God. And give her wisdom about how to walk through it from a place of peace, God. But we just thank you, Lord, that you are right with us in it, God, you never leave us, God. You're so faithful, you're so good. We give you all the glory. And Jesus, and we pray, amen. Love you. Hey, friend, I hope that God used today's episode to speak to you or encourage you in some way. And if he did, don't leave it just with you. There is someone else in your life that needs to hear the encouragement that you heard today. So be sure to share it. And maybe you're still feeling stuck and you're realizing that you're in the same place day after day and nothing is changing and you need to take it a step deeper. If that's you, then the unstuck workshop your next step. You can finish the whole thing in a day and begin getting unstuck. You can find out all the details at maidholdpath.com. Lastly, if the show has meant something to you, I can't tell you how helpful it is for me if you leave a review. I am deeply encouraged, and it also helps other women find the hope and tools that you found. I'm so very grateful for your friend. I can't say it enough and I can't wait to see all that God has in store for you.