The Psychological Power That Wins Every Negotiation Before You Sit Down | Ep 981
from The Game with Alex Hormozi
11m 15s
The speaker shares five of the most effective negotiation tactics learned through real-world experience and mentorship, rather than books. Central to these is the concept of a strong Best Alternative to a Negotiated Agreement (BATNA), which provides psychological leverage and enables better deal outcomes. Whether negotiating with employers, vendors, or in M&A deals, having a clear alternative—like another job or customer—empowers you to demand more. The speaker emphasizes anchoring strategies: setting a high initial offer to shift perceptions and influence the negotiation range, and using counter-anchoring to build trust by stating you wouldn’t accept less. He also highlights the importance of multiple bids or offers to gain market intelligence and avoid being pressured into unfavorable terms. Practical examples, such as a home purchase or a custom desk fix, illustrate how identifying the cost of a mistake or inconvenience can create a justified discount. Ultimately, these tactics work best when applied before negotiations begin, with preparation, mindset, and real-world experience forming the foundation of successful outcomes. The speaker promotes his $100 million scaling roadmap as a free tool to help business owners identify growth stages and overcome common scaling barriers.
Over my career or acquiring in Taylor Businesses for Acquisition.com, I've done a lot of deals.
I want to put the five most brutally effective tactics that I know in one video for you.
A lot of these things I didn't actually learn from books. I learned them from mentors
and actually seeing them do it and learning it like in the streets in the real world.
Most itty bitty tactics like don't actually drive the needle, but these five actually have gotten
deals done and improve my situation or standing in the deal. So let's dive in.
There's three contexts that you're going to use each of these skills with.
The first is with employees and this goes both ways.
If you're an employee trying to negotiate with an employer, then that applies.
The second is going to be vendors.
Now this also applies if you're a vendor who's dealing with customers.
And then third, you've got what I would consider partners.
This is when you do deals, M&A, things like that investment.
So these are kind of the three big vectors that all of this stuff applies to.
So if you're like, I'm not sure if this will work for me.
You for sure, even if you don't have a business, you are an employee.
And if you aren't an employee, you don't want to use that. You certainly have vendors
that come to your house and do things for you like this is the fruit of life.
You have to negotiate and you get what you negotiate, not what you deserve.
That means I'm not fair, but it's also the truth.
Number one, this is actually from a Harvard Business School thing that I learned from
Shiran Sarvata. It's called Badna. Now I didn't know the fancy term for it,
but it means best alternative to a negotiated agreement.
So what does this really mean? Research has shown that having strong badna,
basically a strong alternative gives you significant leverage in negotiations.
Negotiations all about leverage.
London Business School did a study and they found that negotiators who know their alternatives
set higher aspirations so they ask for more.
They make more aggressive first offers and they negotiate ultimately better outcomes.
So your badna serves as almost like an anchor, a counter anchor that you have in the back of your mind
of what you're negotiating with. It's kind of like a source of power.
It's a decision standard that you only accept deals that are better than your best alternative.
You can think about this in any setting. So if you're with a girl and you know that you can only
date tens, if a seven comes along, you're like, well, my alternative is a 10, so I'm only dealing
with tens. If someone says, hey, I'll be willing to buy all of your inventory for 10 bucks a piece
and somebody else comes along and says, I'll do it for nine.
Instead of just saying no, you're like, I'll do it for 10.50 or I'll do it for 11.
You can edge them up, but if you know that it's not going to matter, then it doesn't matter.
So I'll tell you something that recently happened. I'm right now negotiating to buy a home.
It's something that Layla wants and it's aggressive. We already have a home that we like a lot.
I really like the house we have. My best alternative to buying this house is doing nothing
and just enjoying the home that I already have. They're in a terrible position because right now,
I know that they haven't had anyone else who's bid on the property because it's aggressively priced.
That's what that way. It's them versus me and it's who wants it less. The reason bad is so important,
because you're like, okay, I get that. How do I have a best alternative to a negotiated agreement?
You win negotiations and I'm starting with this one, because I think it's all five or six or
ones that I'm going to be so important. But this one is probably the greatest source of psychological
power. And you do this before you sit down to the table. Me going to look at these homes,
I know I don't have to buy the homes. When I was selling gym lunch and prestige labs,
I was like, I can just keep the businesses and they'll just keep making me money.
I don't need to sell them. And from negotiating for that position,
you only want to sell when you don't want to sell. You want to buy when you don't want to buy
because you have something else. If you're looking for jobs as an employee, you want to negotiate
when you already have another offer. So if you're going to your existing employer,
get another offer and then negotiate with that. You can only do that so many times before you start
losing goodwill. So you have to make sure that you're balancing that well. If you're dealing with
a vendor, then you're like, okay, I'm going to get multiple bids before I'm going to decide to work
with you because these are what I'm considering. You'll get so educated from actually negotiating
four, five, six of these vendor agreements that you'll learn other terms that other people include
that you can use, which is a later strategy that I'll explain. Getting multiple offers before
you sit down increases your bets. So for sure, don't take the first offer because even if you have
first offer within the negotiation with one guy, but then you have that offer compared to all the
other offers that you're ultimately going to get to do the work. On the vendor side, it's reverse.
What's my best alternative? What are my other customers? If I've got 20 other customers,
if I've got people banging on the door, it's a supply demand thing. So I've got more demand for
my services than I have supply. And so if you don't want it, don't worry. I've got another customer
behind you. And so this is the leverage that we go back and forth in negotiations. And then finally,
with partnerships, the same idea, how can I get multiple offers from people wanting to buy my business
and the same degree for me? If I'm trying to buy a business, then I want to not have to buy the
business because I've got other businesses I'm looking at. So no matter what, all of this is one
before you sit down to the table. Right now, if you sit down and you need this deal and you've
no other offers, all the little taxes that you can try, sure, you can try to do it. But the
thing is that it's just trying to win at poker only on bluffing. It's a bad position to be in.
I would rather have pocket aces. If you have other offers, there's two different ways of thinking about
this. So one is you can be overt about it and say, listen, this is the counter offer. If you can
beat the offer, beat it. If you can't, no worries. We don't need a waste time. The other ways that
you just have it in the back of your mind, and then you just see what you can get because the thing
is somebody else is giving you a $10 offer. If you say, hey, I've got a $10 offer, maybe this
person will just beat it by $10.25. But if you have the confidence that you know you're going to
sell the inventory no matter what for a profit, shoot for $11. Shoot for $12. Shoot for $15. Like,
you can shoot way higher because you know your plan B is not bad. And so when you show it,
they're just going to buy basically marginally edge it versus you having the confidence to basically
swing big. We're quick. If you're a business owner and you're not growing as fast as you'd like,
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customer success, recruiting, IT, human resources, and finance. And so no matter what you're struggling
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So that's cool. Hit the link. Otherwise, enjoy the rest of the video.
Now the second is a big one. And a lot of negotiation books and courses and stuff talk about this.
And people are like, hey, I'm not trying to anchor here. It doesn't matter if you say I'm not trying
to anchor here. It's an anchor. An anchor is the first number that is set in a negotiation. If you're
like, hey, what do you think you'd be willing to do this for? And someone's like, ah, I was thinking,
I could maybe do it for $2,000. That's now the anchor. You want to get less than that? And you were
like, shoot, I was hoping for $500. Well, something you should have said $500 first because now they're
2,000. This is ridiculous. There is a strategy called counter anchoring, but it's typically not as effective
as anchoring, but it's the only move you have left. Now, the flip side is the reason a lot of people
don't want to put the anchor out is because they don't want a short change. If someone was going to say
yes to 5,000, you put 2,000 out there, you're like, damn, because whenever happens, if someone
gives you a fast yes, you're like, no, I left so much money on the table. So I'll give you a little
approach that I've learned being on the other side of this. If I have somebody who comes to me and says,
hey, I'll do it for $2,000. And I would have paid $5. And I say, yeah, $2,000 works. The next thing I do
is I say, hey, and if you were curious of whether I would do it for $2,500, I wouldn't have done it.
And the thing is that it puts them at ease that like, you know what, you wouldn't have done more.
And what happened is I bought a super expensive penthouse a few years ago. And after I bought it,
the guy who sold it to me, obviously, a wealthy guy too, he said, hey, we accepted your first offer
and you're probably wondering if we would have done it for less. He said, I wouldn't have sold it for a penny less.
It felt so classy. Maybe he would have sold it for penny less. I have no idea. But in the moment,
actually, like I was like, okay, it just made me feel a lot better. So if you're in the reverse
situation, I would put someone at ease by just saying, hey, I wouldn't have done it for any less.
I wouldn't have done it for any more, whatever. What's interesting is that Daniel Nobel Prize winner
figured out that people give excessive weight to the initial information and make insufficient
adjustments from that starting point. It's a psychological bias. Basically, it's like, you want to
anchor as high as possible. That's why I'm a big advocate of getting the gasp. You put the big number
out there because it completely shifts the whole negotiation numbers to way, way higher. And the
things people think in different increments. And that's what we want to change. If you say, I'll do
this work for $100,000, whatever you're in construction. If someone was thinking 10, their increments now
become the entirety of what they were willing to pay. They're going to be like, can you do it for 80?
All of a sudden, we're thinking in $20,000 increments. As a side note, you can also anchor increments.
So explain what that means. I'll actually walk you through the house negotiation that I'm actively
in right now. The house was listed 25 million. Then they dropped it to 20 million because the
market's changed and things like that. Okay. So now they're at 20 million. So I made an offer for 15
million. They countered and said, we'll do it for 16.9. So big move on their part, right? They're
moving aggressively. They're trying to sell the house. They moved a lot towards me because they're
trying to get a deal done. The natural thing that some people might think is, okay, they're at 17,
you're at 15, counter with 16 here. So what I did is I countered with 15.25. So they moved 3 million.
I moved up 250 grand. Things that there's this idea of like movement of you making an offer, I make
an offer. So if I say 15.25, what am I indicating? I'm not willing to move very much. I'm going to
out of reciprocity, which we'll cover later. I'm willing to move a little bit. I'm going to make
some counter offer, but I'm not going to give a lot. Then I can stack in other terms that make it
more ameliorable for them. My initial offer, I had two other things that I was like, okay, I can offer
cash. My first offer is not going to be cash. I can also say, hey, it has furnishings in the house
which are super expensive. I don't want to have to deal with refurnishing the house. What I did was
when I moved up to 15.25, I Sweden the deal by making it at all cash. But then I also said, I also
want the four million dollars of furniture that's in the house, which is technically a worst second
offer. Then my first offer.
But the thing is that I moved the number up and a lot of people are always way too fixated on the price and not enough on the terms
One is we anchor with our original price and also in the increments that we move in
This was something that took me actually a while to figure out and so let me tell you a story about this one
So one of my partners at my gym way back in the day I learned this from him
We had to get this big custom front desk built so I had like multiple cutouts
We have multiple salespeople big impressive thing you get a custom belt the guy came out they built this whole thing
He was like hey when we went to do like the final inspection
We noticed that they had kind of a nick to corner of it just from moving it around or whatever happened right
It was a small nick, but it was noticeable my partner goes to the guy and he says hey
How much would it cost you to replace this and the guy of course because he doesn't want to rebuild the whole thing
He's oh my god
It would be a huge deal for us to have to like just this little thing
We have to go back to the job. We have to do those stuff. It would probably cost us $1,500 just to replace that
And he says that sounds like a pretty good place to start it for a discount
nasty. I was like oh, I'm gonna use that if there's ever somebody who messes something up instead of saying hey
What can you knock off the price ask them what the big inconvenience would be for them a scriber price to it
And then they have a hard time backing down from that because they just said that's how much you would cost them to fix it
Then you should probably discount us by that much because that was the size of the mess up
So you get them bidding for themselves and then you flip it
Podcast Summary
Key Points:
Having a strong "best alternative to a negotiated agreement" (BATNA) gives significant psychological and strategic leverage in negotiations, allowing you to set higher demands and secure better outcomes.
Before entering any negotiation, always assess your alternatives—whether it's another job, vendor, or business—so you can confidently demand better terms and avoid accepting subpar deals.
Anchoring—setting a high initial offer—sharply influences perception and negotiation outcomes, as people overvalue the first number and adjust insufficiently from it.
Counter-anchoring (e.g., saying "I wouldn’t have done it for less") can build trust and reduce resistance, even when the initial offer is low, by creating psychological comfort.
Negotiation strength is enhanced by using both price and terms (like cash payments or included assets) to create a more compelling counter-offer that shifts the balance of power.
Always gather multiple offers or bids before committing, as this increases your knowledge of market standards and strengthens your position.
In partnerships and M&A, having multiple potential deal options ensures you don’t feel pressured into accepting a poor deal.
Real-world experience and mentorship, not just books, teach the most effective negotiation tactics, especially when applied to employees, vendors, and business partners.
Summary:
The speaker shares five of the most effective negotiation tactics learned through real-world experience and mentorship, rather than books. Central to these is the concept of a strong Best Alternative to a Negotiated Agreement (BATNA), which provides psychological leverage and enables better deal outcomes. Whether negotiating with employers, vendors, or in M&A deals, having a clear alternative—like another job or customer—empowers you to demand more.
The speaker emphasizes anchoring strategies: setting a high initial offer to shift perceptions and influence the negotiation range, and using counter-anchoring to build trust by stating you wouldn’t accept less. He also highlights the importance of multiple bids or offers to gain market intelligence and avoid being pressured into unfavorable terms. Practical examples, such as a home purchase or a custom desk fix, illustrate how identifying the cost of a mistake or inconvenience can create a justified discount.
Ultimately, these tactics work best when applied before negotiations begin, with preparation, mindset, and real-world experience forming the foundation of successful outcomes. The speaker promotes his $100 million scaling roadmap as a free tool to help business owners identify growth stages and overcome common scaling barriers.
FAQs
BATNA is your best option if a negotiation fails. It gives you leverage by setting a clear standard—only accepting deals better than your alternative. Research shows that knowing your BATNA helps you set higher initial demands and achieve better outcomes.
A strong BATNA increases your psychological power and confidence. It allows you to make more aggressive offers and reject poor deals, knowing you have a fallback. This shifts the negotiation dynamics in your favor.
Counter-anchoring involves stating that you wouldn’t have accepted a lower offer. It builds trust and helps shift the negotiation by showing you’re not overly eager to accept a low price, making the other party more willing to concede.
People give excessive weight to the first number offered. A high anchor shifts the negotiation’s mental framework, making others perceive larger increments. This leads them to propose higher numbers, improving your final outcome.
Ask the other party how much it would cost them to fix a mistake or defect. This creates a tangible cost they’re reluctant to ignore, allowing you to justify a discount based on their own calculated loss.
Before sitting down, identify your best alternative and research multiple options. This ensures you have leverage, understand your position, and can make stronger, more strategic offers.
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