The Power of Showing Up

Speaker 1 Hey guys, welcome back to the Uphold Herb podcast. I'm your host Jess, and today we're doing something a little different. I have some special guests here with me, 3 ladies from our work at Life Choices. I'm excited we're going to do things different, but my goal is that you'll hear their heart, that you'll get to hear stories of impact and that you just leave today going wow. Like they're not like y'all are special like not don't get me wrong, but they're not like superheroes. Like we're just normal people being obedient with the Lord's asked us to do And like through that, we're just getting to be a vessel that the Lord uses every single day to help women in their hard moments and that they can really overcome them. And so today I know that you're going to hear stories of encouragement, you're going to hear stories of hope and you're going to hear stories that I pray inspire you to get in the game. We need every person being involved and you might just have the story or the missing piece that's just going to ignite a woman to really go, I can be a mother, I can do this. I can overcome really, really hard things and I can move forward with what the Lord has for me. And so I'm excited. We're going to jump in this morning first because we're going to do some hot seat takes. So you're going to see if you're not listening, if you're listening to this and not watching. We are going to have our guests get up and move the next girl in in the hot seat. But today we're starting with my friend Tori. Hi. We got you out of the office today and you're here in our little podcast area that we're been graciously able to use. Thank you. I love it. Thankful for other ministries, which is funny because the ministry, the place that we're using the host this podcast mean you used to work here together. Yeah. So tell them how like before we jump into all that, tell them just a little bit more about who you are. Yes, you have, kiddos. All the things. Speaker 2 Yes. So my name is Tori. Yeah, obviously. Me and my husband have been married for five years. Speaker 1 Of the car, yeah, I still think you're. Speaker 3 20 I know. Speaker 2 26 now, OK. Speaker 1 You're just a big girl. Speaker 2 Yeah, we have a sweet boy. His name's Kyo. He's two years old. Yeah, but he's so big. He looks like A5. Speaker 1 Year old. Yeah, he's the sweetest. Speaker 2 Yeah, he stays. Speaker 1 In our household, we always call him Baby Kyo. But then Marius saw him the other day and he was so big and he's like, we got to stop calling him a baby. This is a big boy, he. Speaker 2 Is he has like the persona of a sweet baby? Speaker 1 Yeah, like he does. Speaker 2 He's he is a big boy and how? Speaker 1 Do you think that demeanor comes from you or your husband? Speaker 2 No, I think he comes from me. Speaker 1 Yes, he looks. Speaker 2 Just like, like my husband, yeah. Speaker 1 So but he's getting my character. Speaker 2 He has my personality. I hope so. Speaker 1 Yeah, sure. Oh, that's so cute. Oh my goodness. OK, so I know like we work together here at well, I'll just say yeah, I'm like, I guess I can say it. I don't know why I hesitate it everywhere, Canson like there's nothing to hide. I was like, I don't know if people know that for reference, sorry. But yeah, we worked here together. It's so funny. When I was thinking about preparing for the podcast today, I was like, really? I I hired you on knowing I could train you because my season was ending here and I never thought that day would come. I love, I still love. And we are in great relationship with Drew and all this staff. I think it's always hard when the Lord starts pulling you from a place that you love and you adore. And then Fast forward, I stepped in as the executive director of Live Choices, and we were needing to hire someone. And I immediately thought of you. And I was like, what a dream that would be if our worlds could cross paths again because I felt like our time was so short together here. And so, yeah. What tell the people, how did you get to live choices besides me approaching you? But like, how did you process through that? Like, yeah, to leave the Dream Center, which is a place you love to. Speaker 2 Yes. No, I love every Arkansan. I've worked here at EA, the nonprofit organization, for three years. And for that time being, I served families experiencing homelessness in Arkansas. But in that field, I became so passionate about serving just moms and motherhood. But at the time, I didn't know what all that could entail, what that can look like. And so I was just like, OK, God, like, what's next? And yeah, you sat me. Speaker 1 Down at a coffee shop. Speaker 2 You're like, hey, I'm dreaming about this role. Your name popped up to my mind and the role, one of them was client advocate, but the other one was resource coordinator to serve moms. And I was just like, what? That's crazy. But as we talked for like, was it two or three hours? My eyes were just so open to the crisis that's happening in Arkansas with women finding themselves in unwanted pregnancies every day. And so after that, I prayed. I did research. Yeah. I was like, OK, God, like, what's next? Is this next? Yeah. And yeah. Now I've been a part of this. Yeah. A year later. Speaker 1 I think what was so fascinating sitting at that table with you is you asked so many questions and I could see I was like, I knew you had a heart. You were doing something here at every Arkansas where you were working with kids and families that were experiencing homelessness and you're working through like a grant through that and could work and partner with schools. And I just watched you kind of like have to develop that role which was given to you. And it's like, well, where do we find these families and how do we get into the local schools and help the school counselors and get these kids the supplies that they need? And you, we kind of joke at live choices because you'll make sure or you give out too many resources. But you know, I'm fine with because I'm like, what? We're not hoarding this stuff like people donate diapers and people donate clothes and like, if a Mama needs it, why are we going to well, how many points do you have? You know, like we're not we, there is a system, but hey, if my mom's really in need or she really loves that outfit, like we can extend some like, you know what, you can just have it. You will always be the one that does it. Everyone else, like Tori, you know, they're like, there's no way she has that many points to be what that's kind of a running joke. But I knew that day sitting down with you that you would do that for our our women. And so I just thought it was so fascinating that like you had so many questions. I remember feeling like I think I just exploded her mind, which I felt the same way because working in this world, we worked with a lot of kids and did after school programs and food insecurity and all of that. And then to start the conversation with moms at Conception, I know for me it was like we can get ahead of some of these problems that we saw on the back end. Like how have you saw that as you're sitting down with clients knowing your history of what you've worked with before into now? Speaker 2 Yeah, that's such a good question. I would say, you know, I we see this everywhere. When I was with every Arkansan and even now, so many moms find themselves in generational cycles or relational lack. And like you said, if we can jump the gun a little bit and meet them where they're at when they first find out first pregnancy, you know, they don't have like the relationships that they need for support or to be provided for. And I was, I was excited in the midst of like the uncertainty that a mom might find herself in or a woman might find herself in because just the things that we could offer her as far as, you know, material resources, which is great. I love giving that. Speaker 1 But your mom, too, You're like, I know how important those diapers are. Speaker 2 But counseling and classes and things like that and just in hopes of even if we can be a small part of adding value to her, like my hope is that can slowly break off those cycles that she's. Speaker 1 In Yeah. What do you think when you you finally said yes to me? He called me back like just I'm going to go in and have that conversation. Shout out to Drew. You did give me permission to approach Tori. But I am, I'm thankful for Drew too. He's such a team player in building the Kingdom. He doesn't care where we're all doing it. He just cares that we're doing something. So I do appreciate that about him, that when I called and was like, can I approach Tori? Like, I know she's a vital person to your team, too. He did say good luck. And I was like, I think I got God's favor on my side. No, but then you. But for all you called and like, I would love to have the job. When you first started, what is something that you can think and recall like that shocked you, surprised you about being a part of a pregnancy center? Speaker 2 Yeah, I would say no matter what her like a mom finds herself in just the willingness that a woman might have. And so we see, you know, women who are undecided or maybe they are excited. They just don't know what to do. They don't know anything about baby. Speaker 1 Or. Speaker 2 How to take care of a baby or anything, but just the willingness for them to say yes to their first class, to say yes to their first counseling session, to say yes to shopping in the baby for the first time ever. But all of those steps I was saying yes. Like those are small steps she took to further walk in motherhood, like boldly and confidently. So just, you know, even if they're not able sometimes they don't have transportation all the time. Sometimes. Oh well, we see women by themselves a lot like the father of the baby is not involved. Maybe the her parents are not involved, doesn't have friends or whatever the case might be, but she's willing to walk through our doors and take that small step of whatever that looks. Speaker 1 Oh, I know. I'm like, they're so brave. If I was terrified to show up to a place unknown, have to go through that, find out that I'm pregnant all alone, and then at my next appointment I'm sitting across the table from you, it's like, OK, like this can be a friend. You know, like you're not too much older than a lot of them, or maybe you're younger than some of them even. And you're saying, hey, you don't have to know the whole end game. You just have to know the next step. And I think you do that so graciously to say, I'm going to walk you through this. And the next step is like, let's learn what your body is going through. Let's get you through these first few classes with our prenatal care so you can learn how babies growing, what helpful things you need to do for your growing body. And I think as they get into those classes and they're sitting with our educators and they're learning, it is like, oh, like this isn't so terrifying because I mean, any woman, even if you're trying to have baby, when you get like confirmation a lot pregnancy test, like you're pregnant, you're like crap just got real, you know, like, OK, even me, like we were planning, we were going through fertility, like really trying, you know, paying to have baby, you know, and, and it's still, it's like we are really doing this thing now. What do I do, you know? And so I love that you get to meet women in those moments of just. You might feel overwhelmed, but here's practical steps to get you to the other side. I know you work directly with clients to provide resources and education. We're kind of, you know, hitting on some of that. What have you learned as you're walking women in that area? Like. Yeah. Speaker 2 This may not be like a light bulb moment or anything extravagant, but I've learned most of these moms, if not all of them, just want to be the best mom that they can be. For themselves, for their baby, for their family, their kids. Because we see moms in all seasons of life, whether they have 4 kids or it's their first pregnancy, they just want to be the best they can be. We have a Mama that we all know and love on the team. She is consistent, she's faithful, and she shows up time and time again. But she has found herself in many crisis situations and it's hard to watch her go through some of these things and process with us. A lot of it is out of her control. But regardless of what's been going on in her life, she still shows up like she is coming to class weekly. She's getting the diapers and clearing that she needs for her sweet baby. And she is such a good mom to her two little ones. She really is. Speaker 1 I love that I know you get to see countless stories like that. Is there a story, a person that's impacted you that will like stay with you forever? Speaker 2 Yes, a Mama who has been honestly a blessing to my life. She is older than me. Her name's Latoria. We've talked about her on social media a little bit. I remember her coming in her first appointment with her husband and she was nervous, so nervous, so doubtful. She was just like, Tori, I don't know what I'm going to do. I don't know anything about baby. I don't have anything to provide for baby. But I guess we're just going to do this right, Right. I was like, yes girl, we can help. Speaker 1 You. Speaker 2 And so we I. Speaker 1 Love her joy. Speaker 2 Oh my gosh. Speaker 1 Like she just has a, she is a little bit older. I mean my age. We're not too old. Speaker 2 No, no, but. Speaker 1 Just like this. I love that as people like her specifically, she always has the heart to learn. And she has so much humility about her that she's just like, you know, at her age, you'd be like, I should know something. But she just says, like, please tell me everything. I want to be the best. And so yeah, sorry, didn't mean to tell me about her. Speaker 2 She's so humble and will admit if she doesn't know something. Gosh, I'm opposite of that. I'm like, Oh yeah, I know that. Speaker 1 Faking it till I'm making it. Yeah. I'm like, why am I making it harder? I could just ask a question. Yeah. So she inspires me to like, just ask the question. It's OK to not know. Speaker 2 Oh my gosh. And I won't forget this. Like after we signed up her her classes and parenting class program, we were like, you come to classes, you're in points. Yeah. You get the education and tools that you need. Yeah. To be a Mama. Yeah. And for her husband to be a dad. And so there's two times the first appointment again, I won't forget it. She looked at me and she was like, how much does this cost the first time? So I keep like a small stack of DeVos on my desk for any woman who asks. I'll give it to them for free. She looked at it, Latoria. Then she was like, how much does that cost? I want one. It's like, yeah, it's yours. Like, yeah, free Devo. And then the second time, after we were done with the appointment, she signed up for what she needed to. We walked back to the baby boutique and I start going in my spiel. I'm like, yeah, we have clothing, diapers, wipes, baby equipment, formula, the whole 9 yards. And I look back, I see her walking, look around and she takes a few steps back. It looks like she had to catch her breath for a moment. And she goes, what is all this going to cost me? I was like, Latoria says. This is why we have you signed up for classes. So not only get the education, but you can have the dignity to shop here. Yeah. To provide for your baby. Speaker 1 Right. You get to pick out items that like you personally like yes, we're not just giving them like random supplies or clothes and say, oh, you're having a girl here is like 5 onesies like getting to go in and like shop and go, I like pink and I'm going to pick out five pink ones. It's like I want to do neutral stuff like they get to be selective and I, I love that part too about how we do things because it does provide the dignity of it all. So. Speaker 2 Exactly, and now she she hasn't missed a class since last. Speaker 1 Year she. Speaker 2 Signed up. She really hasn't. She shows up and now we we've gotten to provide her a car seat, a stroller, clothing. It's hard though, because her and her baby have been through the ringer. She delivered very early. Her sweet baby girl has been in the NICU since December, but we are going to rejoice and that little fighter is gonna be brought home one day. Speaker 1 I know she's gonna be in the center. I cannot wait for her to stop in and they'll finally get to do their newborn photos and it's just gonna be sweet moments that we're gonna get to rejoice with her. I love, that's what I love about so much, what we get to do. It's not just walking with them in the moment of their like uncertainty or crisis or overwhelm moment. We're going to say like, no, it's so much more than just this moment. We're going to walk you through. We're going to get baby here and then we're going to keep walking with you until your baby's two years old. So like the time that baby turns 2. We have been with them for almost three years. It's like we're in deep relationship with them. We know the good, the bad, the ugly by that point because we all become a listening ear, but we y'all really do become friends with people and so. Speaker 2 It's so sweet. This is a little fun fact. When we had a parenting class earlier this month, I did announce I was pregnant. Yeah, We had a smaller class that day, and we're a relationship with all of them. And they were so kind and so sweet. That's not even why I announced it. I was like, this kind of goes along with the topic. Yeah. Latoya goes why I did not know you were. Speaker 1 Pregnant SO. Speaker 3 Sweet. Speaker 2 She was just so excited. Now she won't stop talking about it. I'm like, girl, you're. Speaker 1 So silly our girls are the same age or you're having a girl. But yeah, mommy married one day. I love that. I know faith is at the heart of what we do at Life Choices and I just love to hear from you on like, what is a prayer you carry for every family you serve? Speaker 2 Yeah, gosh, for each and every client and family who walk through our doors to feel loved and to feel seen. Yeah. You know, we may only get a few minutes with a person. Yeah, maybe up to an hour and then they leave or maybe just in passing, we'll talk to someone. But my hope is that they get filled up when they walk through our doors. So whether that's filled up with the love that they needed that day, peace that they needed that day, the stress and anxiety off of them. For me, a lot of times it is a pack of diapers and lives. You know, if it's that material that makes it through the week for their baby, then yeah, let's get that stress off. So the goal is for all of us is that they leave differently than how they. Speaker 1 Came in. I love that. And I know as we come to close and we get another person in the hot seat and we'll get you out of it because I know you're like, please hurry up. That's OK. You're doing great though. I'm proud of you. Tori. What advice would you give someone wanting to maybe volunteer or be a part of life choices? Yeah, my. Speaker 2 Think about this. I remember when we sat down just how unqualified I felt when you offered presented this role to me. I was like, why me? There's there's no way like it's a joke, but I mean it's, it's so true. Like for me, I, I felt unqualified, but a quote I could not stop thinking about was God doesn't call the qualified. He qualifies the call and I had that repeated over in my head so many times and I really felt like it was the Lord saying, Hey, you can do this. You you don't know all the answers. I don't. And I thought I needed to know everything politically going on in our state in our nation. I thought I needed to know all the knowledge about pregnancy and baby. I'm a mom, but I don't have all the answers right. But still the Lord was just like this is. This is for you. Be that willing vessel and just go forth. Speaker 1 And I think what's so powerful in that is like in your obedience of saying, yes, when you get in the room with a girl, like all the noise of all the like things that didn't qualify you, I know, go quiet and dim because you're sitting across someone who's just hurting. I think Jesus would be in that room all the time because he's like, these are girls coming in saying I need help. And I know for me and for you, we've experienced him chasing us down and coming to us and meeting us when we weren't willing just to walk through a door and say, I don't know what I'm doing, but like I'm in help. And so the fact that our girls are coming in, maybe they don't directly say I need help, but they came through the door and they know on the other side of this, I'm hopeful that there's help waiting for me. And so I just think it's a powerful thing that you get to do was just sitting with them, letting the noise or the distractions of like all with the world and the chaos is going on. It's like, listen, we're just here to grab each girl by the hand individually and walk them through. And we really try to stick to our protocol and all the things. But when you're working with people, every scenario is absolutely different. And I just think like where you do it so graciously that you get to know each individual girl. You walk them through all the education, you hold their hand, you shop with them, you get to know them, you get to know baby and now walking with them and postpartum and, you know, launching that program too. I know we're just getting to know all of our girls in a much more like intimate, relational way because our hope is that we can just be the light in their darkness and that eventually they would come to know the Lord and they give me the light to their friends and their communities and their circles. And some thank you friend, for saying yes to taking the job at saying yes to doing this because you really do. You leave an impact every single day that you come into work. I know it'll be everlasting with the girls that you serve. And so. All right, You ready to get all the hot seats? All right, Melissa, you're it's your turn. OK, We're jumping in now. You're in the hot seat, Melissa. I know. I'm very thankful you said yes to you. Melissa just got back from travelling Europe, so we've all been Jelly of her, you know. How many countries did you travel to? Speaker 4 9. Speaker 1 9 I know you were glad to be home. I mean, it's beautiful, but not in countries in like 2 1/2 weeks. Y'all were getting it. Y'all were doing vacation like my husband's parents would. Yeah. It got every day planned, mapped out everything scheduled. Did you have like an itinerary? Speaker 4 No, we just kind of played it day by day. Speaker 1 Which is great. Speaker 4 Yes. Speaker 1 But y'all knew when y'all needed to get to what country by a certain point. I like that. So there was plan, but kind of relax. Speaker 4 Absolutely. Speaker 1 That's a happy medium. I need to tell my husband that like he likes like friends sun up sundown. We went and traveled and we met his aunt one time and as a joke, she had like an envelope with the itinerary on it. She made a shirts with the itinerary on it. She's like Maury, she will never forget the itinerary. And I was like this. This is my side of the family just poking fun at it. So anyways, OK, tell us a little bit more about yourself, or I mean, I know you, but you know, people listening in. Speaker 4 First, my name is Melissa. Yeah, I am a wife and mother to five and Mimi to 10 grandbabies. Speaker 1 10 Grandbabies yes gosh, that's so crazy. 10 How often do you get to see them? Often. I know they're all like all over the place, right? Speaker 4 They are, but they're just within two hours, OK. Speaker 1 This is not horrible. Speaker 4 It's not bad. Speaker 1 Yeah, I think my mom was still say that's bad. She likes to pop in on like a Thursday, you know, two hours. You're not just popping in. Yeah, they're also not dropping them off either. So maybe it's a win win. Speaker 4 We do make a plan to see them. Speaker 1 Off. I love that, OK. And I you work with our counseling department and you oversee that, which I think is such a beautiful thing. We've gotten to really start in the last year. We've had counselors, but I feel like me and you've really processed through a lot of that. I'm excited as we continue the conversation you to share your heart more on that. But so we have licensed counselors, Melissa, like overseas, getting them organized, putting the right the client with the right counselor and just helping the girl get through the paperwork side of that, like our clients and all of that. What has like being a part of that role? Like what I know, I know you've just love love what what you get to do. Will you just share like why that's so a passion point for you it? Speaker 4 Is absolutely a passion point because I went through recovery 20 years ago and since then have what through some counseling just from past issues and realize what it a tremendous difference it made for me. Yeah. So as we see young ladies that are coming in and life may not be just perfect, right. The difference it makes for them when they get in to see a professional counselor, maybe get some redirection, some support, someone just to talk. Speaker 1 To you, right, right. So like I, I know you actually came on staff at Life choices before I did. And I'm so thankful because you know, you never know when you take a new job and you have some of the staff you're like, I hope, you know, like people like me, it's just, and you are always so warm and welcoming. I'm very thankful for that. But I would love to hear like, how did you come to life choices? Because I might even be missing some parts of that story. Speaker 4 Sure, after I went through recovery years ago, I just placed a passion in my heart to see other people recover. So I began leading people through abortion recovery, but also sharing my story anywhere I could about the devastation of abortion so that maybe others can make a better decision for themselves. I moved to Conway about four years ago and it was in the neighborhood of life. Speaker 1 Choices. Speaker 4 So as I would walk by in the evenings, it was like there begin to be a pull from God just saying maybe you should check into this. So I did and there wasn't an opening at this time. And so I began to walk and walk through the parking lot even and say Lord, if it would be your will, then I could be on this team. Then open the door and in December of 2023 I got a notification that there was an opening. Wow. And in January of 24, I began. Speaker 1 You prayed your way in. I love that. You're like, you know what it's like. What is it in the Bible where they circle at 7 times is like, you're like, I'm going to work there one day. I love that, Melissa. So I know you've worked years, so I know that may not have shocked you when you came into life choices, but what is something that you're like when you finally got the job, you said, yes, you're working there. What is something that stood out? You're like, whoa, I didn't expect that in the pregnancy center world. Speaker 4 I think the thing that shocked me about life choices was a pleasant surprise, and that was our vision to walk with a young lady all the way through parenthood. Like from pregnancy to parenthood. Not just a pregnancy test, right? Not just an ultrasound, maybe even not so much just the classes, right, But really going on the journey with her and offering her every available resource that we could. Yeah. Actually getting to know them and when they come in, knowing their children by name. Speaker 1 Yeah. Speaker 4 And actually doing the journey with them, that was a pleasant surprise for. Speaker 1 Me, yeah, Because you're kind of thinking, oh, I'll just see them. They're going in this moment. They're going to be scared and like I guess I'll may not ever get to talk to them again. And I think even me when I first started working and kind of just watching it and observing it, I was like, I think one of my things that really stood out was there was a girl who just had her baby and left the hospital and came straight to life choices. And I was like and all y'all ran outside and everyone was seeing the baby. And I remember that was a moment for me. I was like, oh we're there people. We are there safe place and I I had, you know, I have two kids and I was like the only people I wanted to see right after having my baby was my mom and my closest of friends. And I realized stepping back going, wow, they're in deep relationship with these girls. It's not just they're here to receive something or take a resource. They're like they care about just getting to know even the people that work here and in vice versa. Y'all take such good care of getting to know them. And we serve over 500 women. That's a lot of women coming through our doors that we know on an individual basis. I'm like, we're running a small church over here, you know, like we're in the dev, we're in the weeds where we're taking care of resources. And man, it's been so cool to watch you. I know you work directly with our clients and placing them with their counselor. Have what have you learn as you walk with women in this part of the area of our programming? Speaker 4 I've seen a lot of young ladies come in kind of in a hard place, walk through with their counselors over a series of months and really come on the other side of that growing in their motherhood, growing and dealing with past issues. And I just feel like they really have overcome so much and they they begin to blossom. Speaker 1 When they come to life, yeah. I think that's one thing me and you have talked about so much. And like our just one-on-one meetings and planning and development of this area is, you know, we're taking care of a lot of things. We're taking care of the ultrasounds until they can get in with their OB. You know, like Tori was just talking about the resources and taking care of those, those, you know, physical things that they're going to need in their home to make baby safe and just the hygiene and all the things. But a lot of area that kind of got overlooked for maybe a season was these women are carrying maybe past traumas. Maybe they have shame wrapped around how they got pregnant. Maybe they're pregnant out of wedlock and they're facing their friends and family and that's a toll on them. They're having to go into church and they're not married and they're pregnant. And maybe just, you know, just the religious side of all of that comes with caring shame. And now that we've implemented having licensed counselors with us and you're placing them with them, like I just feel like it's for us. I'm, I know our biggest prayers that we're going to see generational patterns break off of them. They're going to see freedom, which is ultimately going to just launch when they have this child into a more consistent atmosphere. So mom has the tools to self regulate and not get overwhelmed or not be triggered from her past. And so has there been a moment where you've seen a girl like, transform in that way? Speaker 4 I have, and the person that comes to mind is someone that I LED through abortion recovery this last year. She was so dedicated and coming to classes. She was even sick one week and asked if she could Zoom. Yeah, have a meeting via Zoom because she didn't want to miss. She was so dedicated, and I began to see her transformation. Yeah, during her ceremony, we allow them to invite people that to come for support. And I had just watched her change so much and then her healing. And then she stood there and shared with us, we honor her and she honors her child or children and then reads a letter to them and testifies about what God has done. Yeah. And she began to use the word, I'm free. I'm free, right? I'm. I'm free. And I was like, wow, Yeah. It truly has happened for her. She truly has walked through this hard place and found forgiveness and embraced her children and are honoring them today. And as I looked around the room, I saw her mom. Yeah. I saw her brother right in her little and her little son. Yeah. And she was carrying a child in her womb, and she's honoring these. Speaker 1 Two. Yeah. Speaker 4 And I saw full fold, like generations in the room. Yeah. They were being changed by the power of God and the healing that he can only bring. Right. And I thought that was like the icing, you know, on the cake. Yeah. And then her mother came to me and said, you know, I told my daughter about life choices because I came to life choices. Speaker 1 That's incredible. Speaker 4 And so I got to see a full fall. Yeah, we are making a difference in generations. Speaker 1 Generations, yeah. Speaker 4 Through healing and counseling, their lives are never, will never be the same. Speaker 1 That's right, that's right. And I, it's just there's so many things that are just coming to mind. I'm going to try to get my, my train of thought, you know, me sort of rapid fire everywhere. But first, I just want to say thank you because you've used your story to turn around and bring healing that you've experienced through Jesus to offer that to others. You know, one in three women have had an abortion. And I was like, there's so many people who've had that, that just sit in silence. But you've received the healing from the Lord and you're like, I know what this can bring to others. And so the fact that you carve out space that you are always bringing it to all of us and the staff on the forefront of our minds that if a girl walks in and she maybe decides to go that route, because that does happen. Not every story is fairy tales and rainbows and every woman carries their baby to full term. We do have girls that call us and say, which is wild, that they're in deep enough relationship. They will still call and say, I've actually chosen this route and that you step in in that moment and you check in with them constantly through their journey. Like on the other side of it, it's not like, well, that's your decision. And we wipe our hands of you. You chase after them in a kind, gentle way, but that, hey, we're here for you. And that women have received that and they've walked in you and you roll up your sleeves because when you're walking them through abortion recovery, it's different. They're having to grieve. It gets snotty in there because they're crying big tears. They're grieving something that and a child that they've lost, They're grieving that they've bought into a lie from the enemy. And you're sitting with them and maybe the darkest moments of their life. But for you to, like you said, like the icing on the cake is when you're getting to watch her declare freedom for herself and for her family, that her family will have that same impact because you just all you did was turn around and say yes. And now she is willing and wants to have other friends that she know that she knows that I've walked through that like they need this, They need this. And it's like that's that is literally like, as all believers, the gospel should impact us enough to run around and say you need this, you need this. And yeah, one sin is just abortion, right? But there's so many other things that we have been freed from us believers and Christ followers that that should make us want to run into the streets and say you need this. And so thank you, Melissa, for just being willing to always go there and just support, supporting our, our clients with you understand the impact of sitting down with the counselor. And I'm thinking of the, the scripture. It says like, sure, like we give our hearts to the Lord, we're saved. But when we confess our stories, we're healed. And I think you, you understand that fully. And you're like, listen, sometimes it takes confessing to be fully healed. And that's confessing some of those darkest moments in our lives. And so I think you just graciously walk our women through that and, and you care so deeply too, about if they've had a miscarriage and just showing up for them and that as well. How is that like, you know, because we just keep developing the counseling program. It's like we have this girl who's had a miscarriage and we need to do something. What's your heart? How do you process that morning to meet them where they're at? I. Speaker 4 Think just, you know, looking at their background, seeing where their hurts have been, have they walked through that process of healing yet? How can we reach that girl? How can we minister to her? You know, a lot of times it doesn't work out for them to have children. Yeah. And that's such a hard part, right? When they truly desire it and they keep having losses, right. And just being able to minister to her in that moment, offer her some healing during that time and watching her just allow God to bring healing into your life. It's it's it's a wonderful place to sit. I see it as just like sitting on the front of miracles. Yeah. As God does the work. Speaker 1 Does the work? Yeah. What in hope or encouragement do you want to leave with the women and families you meet with? Because it's your why. It's your why you get up. I always say, like I always tell our team, you have to have your why and you better spend time with the Lord because you're on the front ground of the battle every day and you will pour everything out. So like, yeah, what's your hope for every family that you get to serve at LIFE Choices? Speaker 4 I think I always want them to know that there is so much there if they will just take it, you know, so much that's so good. Not only in the Kingdom as far as healing and God speaking into our lives and directing us, but the resources that are available to counseling, the things that we can offer with our education, the support group that they have just coming in and being a part of our our classes where there's other individuals on this journey, right? I wake up just hoping that I say something that is encouraging, that breaks that stigma of, yeah, you're weak if you come to counseling. You're so good. You're weak if you address these issues and talk about them because they wanted you. But the reality is we stay broken right until we walk into that healing. And so my hope and prayer is that I communicate to them such healing that it becomes appealing. Speaker 1 Oh, that's good. Yeah, that's so good. And I going off that, you know, you're saying like there's such a stigma around counseling, like I'm weak or I'm just going in there to like vent and talk. I got, I have my my friend for that. I have my mom for that. It's like, no, no, no, they're not just a friend that's listening. They're they're helping you move forward in the conversation, not just repeat the conversation. It's like, no, you have to break it to move forward. And sometimes you cannot do things alone. Like I if as much as I might want to lose weight, I, I'm not a dietitian and like, I need accountability and like as much as I'm like, oh, I'm going to work out. Yeah, I'm probably going to do a good job by myself one or two, three times, then I'm probably going to fall off, right? Because unless we have someone championing or like you're meeting up with someone. So if it's simple things like that, why do you think you want to go in and talk about your past hurts? Like you're not just naturally going to want to wake up one day and go, you know what? I want to deal with that. And I want to go walk through all and tread through all that trauma. Like, no, you don't. But when you have accountability and you have a meeting and you show up for yourself, you understand that I'm doing a work that's for me to like grow. It's like I don't want to continue to act in these behaviors anymore. Like it's almost like, do you want? Even if it's just out of curiosity to try something different so that you can produce something different than just repeating the same thing. And so, yeah, what's one thing as we come to a close, get you out of the hot seat. And all the girls said yes to doing this. I think reluctantly, but they did it. I'm proud of all. What's one thing that you would tell someone? Any practical tips for walking alongside families with compassion? Speaker 4 We never know where that person has been and what they've been through. A lot of times they won't speak about it. I know there's so many things even in my own life that I have not shared until recently because I went through some healing and was able to talk about it. And so sometimes just being more gracious, understanding that maybe the walk the road that they're on is tough, right? And they may not talk about it. That may be why you're seeing the the fruits that you're seeing. Yeah. But to have compassion and ask God to show you how can I minister to that person, right? What gifts and talents do I have that God wants to use to change, make a change in this person's life, to invest in this person's life? Because we're making a difference for the Kingdom and we're making a difference for the generations going forward. Speaker 1 I think it just reminds me of we're never going to be fully like complete until we're in heaven. And so we shouldn't have that expectations on the people we're doing life with like their course. They're growing and and growing in Christ image as much as I am as well. And so if I can just extend that same grace that I want for myself because I'm going to mess up and trip up and and fell and not ace it. It's like how can we look for ways just to serve one another? I think that's beautiful, Melissa. Well, thank you again for being in the hot seat. I think we're going to bring Julia on now, our baby of the group. Thank you so much. I really appreciate it. OK, Julia, not Julie. I feel like the first week you weren't here. I thought you, Julie. Speaker 3 You definitely did. Speaker 1 Yeah, I know. And then what's funny is test. This can all be in this. This is funny. OK, I get home last night and or yesterday and I'm talking to Riley, my daughter. And I'm like, hey, Julia. No, no, no, I didn't. My Aunt Julie, I was like, hey, Aunt Julie is going to go to the zoo with us on on Friday. And she's like, really? And she gets so excited. I'm like, yeah. And like you already knew this. And she's like, what? And she's like, I didn't know this. I'm like, yeah, Aunt Julie's coming. And then she's like, from your work. And I was like, that's Julia. So it's generational. I love that she immediately called you. She thinks you're Julie, too. I am. Speaker 3 Firmly accepting the invitation to go to the zoo with y'all. Speaker 1 We're going to Memphis. Speaker 3 I'll bring you ready. Yeah, I'll bring kolaches for me and. Speaker 1 Then I also told her that you've never been to Scoot Dog and that she was like, yeah that sounds like something y'all should probably do while you're at work because she doesn't like it. Speaker 3 She's like, you can leave me out of that one, but you guys should definitely do. Speaker 1 I'm in. I'm ready. Speaker 3 I love that. Speaker 1 Absolutely not, that sounds like something y'all should do during work. I was like. Speaker 3 I agree. Touché Let's pencil that. Speaker 1 In Yeah, we'll bring that in. We'll try to get you back to North Florida. Speaker 3 I love it. Perfect. This is the first time I drove on the Interstate today I'm. Speaker 1 For the for the people listening. Speaker 3 She's joking. That's a joke, yeah. Speaker 1 Yeah, she lives way out. Speaker 3 I live in the boonies. Speaker 1 In the boonies. Do you really though? I don't know. Speaker 3 I live. Speaker 1 Like, do you live on land? Do you live in a neighborhood? Speaker 3 And, well, not really a neighborhood. Speaker 1 It's land, yeah. Speaker 3 It's like a family compound style. Speaker 1 No way. Yeah. See, we're still learning. She's the newest member of this job. And how long have you been here now? 6-7 months a year. Speaker 3 Almost a year. June will be a year, yeah. Speaker 1 Time is flying. Speaker 3 Time is flying. 2026 is almost over. Speaker 1 Girl don't say that my kids turning 7 this year. Speaker 3 Oh my goodness. Speaker 1 I'm crying more as she ages than like me aging. I'm just like what happened to my little girl. Speaker 3 7 When I turned 7, that was my favorite. Speaker 1 Really. Speaker 3 Yeah, I had a pirate theme birthday. Speaker 1 You did. I did. I should offer that to Riley. Super cool. Speaker 3 Really. Yeah, it was awesome. Speaker 1 Last year she had Lizzie McGuire. That's awesome. Yeah. She's just living vicariously through me. I love it. A 90s kid. Yeah, like, I love this. I'm here for this birthday party. Speaker 3 Have you seen the new makeup line at Walmart? Speaker 1 Yes, my mom's bought it for her. Oh, good. Yeah, it has a little cartoon character. Yeah, the low gloss. I bet you have it too. Speaker 3 Well, I was gonna buy it for Riley. Oh, you know, I was like, I don't wanna buy this kid makeup and just be like, she's six years old, dude. Speaker 1 Dude, one of my favorite things about life choices is that there was a receiving blanket, which is just a bit like that. You swaddle. I know yours. Julia's still learning all what the baby materials are. Yeah. So anyways, it was Lizzie McGuire. What? Speaker 3 Yeah. Speaker 1 That's amazing. I may or may not took it home. Absolutely. I'll donate another one. Speaker 3 Yeah, I gotta save. Speaker 1 Everyone Riley. Riley was like. Speaker 3 This is the best blanket. Speaker 1 I know she sleeps with it. Speaker 3 Oh, that's really like, that's just a big baby. Yeah, I love this. It's like who? Speaker 1 This Lizzie McGuire. Speaker 3 I love. Speaker 1 It so don't hate me donors. I did take it. Whoever did that, it made my daughter's day. She replaced. I have donated lots of my son's clothes in return, so that's good. OK, tell us a little bit about yourself other than everyone knows you're fun now when you're young. Speaker 3 My name is Julia I this is like personal stuff or like. Speaker 1 Whatever you want. Speaker 3 OK. Speaker 1 I'm Julia. Not married yet. Not married. Speaker 3 Yet. Speaker 1 Hard launch my boyfriend. Speaker 3 I did welcome Spring. Go check out the insta post, give it a like and follow. Speaker 1 Let's just. Speaker 3 Say. Speaker 1 Julia keeps all of our staff young. I literally went home and was telling Marius how you were just talking yesterday and you're talking about, like, stemming. And he was like, I need a Google without me. And I was like, I'm just glad that I'm more relevant. He worked with kids and, like, at the Dream Center forever, so he would always knew, like, all the songs and like, all the hip phrases. But now he's pastoring a church and knows none of that. So I'm like, yeah, she's stemming. Speaker 3 Yeah, I was playing with my fidget cube while I was waiting for my turn to film because I was freaking out. Yeah. Speaker 1 So. So how old are? Speaker 3 You. So I am 21, OK. I'm not no. What? Cut that out. I'm 22. I just turned 22. Yeah, yeah. Speaker 1 This month, don't cut it. She's still climbing 21. Speaker 3 I'm 22 years old. I live on the family compound with my family. I have three dogs and two cats. My dogs, yeah, they're my babies. I have Lottie Lemon Bruiser Mac and cheese and Junie B Jones are my dogs. And then my cats, Tucci and baby Ellie Tucci. Tucci. Yeah, her name's actually Tallulah. Baby Belle. Nice, but she goes by Tucci. Speaker 1 I think one of my favorite memories with you so far at Life Choices is we had it the snow days, we couldn't make it into the office. And so I was like, hey, can you just like FaceTime me or Zoom or whatever we got going on? And she was like, yeah, but my, my kids aren't, or like my animals aren't acting well or something. And I was like, yeah. Speaker 3 They were actually like my kids were. Speaker 1 Screaming in the background. So like, I don't care. Speaker 3 Yeah, my kitten baby Ellie was like walking on the laptop. I was like it. Speaker 1 Was very distracting, but we got through it. We made it. We got. Speaker 3 Our spreadsheets in that time. Speaker 1 Oh my gosh. OK, so tell me what I know. I know similarly kind of the Tory said he wouldn't hit get on the camera, but we're going to make her take a photo. Speaker 3 We also tried to pass and she told me I couldn't. Speaker 1 So I'll pass on being on the podcast. She's. Speaker 3 Like no, that's you can't. Speaker 1 Yeah, you'd be fired. No, just kidding. Referral, referral. No HR coming at us, but I know she approached you too. I remember talking with Sid in our office one day and I was just like, we need to hire another role and we need someone really has strong administration. And she was like, I have the person in mind. And I was like, OK, She's like, she is younger. I'm like, I'm down. You know, I was like, I would love to meet her. So like, then we met. You came in for an interview. Let me. So. Yeah. When you left, what'd you process? Well, I didn't. Speaker 3 Realize that that was an interview. Speaker 1 OK, cool. Speaker 3 You guys said Said said that it was a tour, so I was like, I can. Speaker 1 Go back. Speaker 3 Door I was like, I can go on a tour and turned out it was my interview and so I'm glad I didn't psych myself out about it for sure. What was crazy, I was in just a crazy season of just seeking what the Lord's will was for me. I was becoming very successful in the line of work that I was previously in. I was having to make some major life decisions and life choices. I was. Speaker 1 Seriously, for everyone. Speaker 3 For everyone, even before I was on the team, I was seriously, I was just in a season of abiding so much. Like I literally went and got it tattooed on my wrist. Like I was weighing all of the options. I was putting applications in different jobs. I was, you know, training. I worked in law enforcement before. I was getting ready to crossover. So I dispatched, I was led. I was ready to go on the road. I was ready to be like just jump in and commit my life to that. And I was having a little bit of struggle because I loved it and it definitely was a passion of mine and is a passion of mine. I've grown up around it, but I just felt like such an important part of myself was just kind of slipping through my fingers. Oh, as a woman in law enforcement, you have to be very tough and you have to be very straightforward and you have to just be very direct. And I am all of those things by nature. But I was losing the compassionate side of me. I was losing my love for people. So I had to really just take a look in the mirror and decide whether that was my dream or my life's call. And in that same I was like, I mean, I guess now the tail end of that season, Sid approaches me. I serve in the youth ministry at our church with her and her husband Ethan. I serve under him with the girls small group. And she approached me and said, hey, we have this like, kind of position open. You know, it would be Mondays and Thursdays, 9 to 5:00 PM. And we would just really love to, like, chat with you. Just come in for a tour, like very low pressure, whatever. And I was like, OK, this is my sign. This is my chance. So I go in for a tour and we're walking around and it's like a spa. Tori was sitting at the front desk and I literally thought like, this is bring your daughter to work day. I didn't realize Tori was older than me, married and had a child. Speaker 1 She must be Jess's little sister. Speaker 3 I thought so. So we had our tour. I sat down with you and Sid and you guys really just went over what you did and just kind of the opportunity that I had. And you said this would be a perv. Like we want this to turn into full time at some point. And I was like, this is my answer to prayer. This is my way out. I've been praying for clear direction. Do I stay? Do I go when I'm in right now? And I was like, this is my sign. So at that time I was working the night shift. So I was working Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday nights, 8:00 PM to 6:00 AM. And then I was working at Life Choices, 9:00 to 5:00 on Mondays and Thursdays. So that went on for a few months and I mean, I was just burning the candle at both ends and I was happy. I was a little sleep deprived. Speaker 1 Just a little. Just. Speaker 3 A little and there came to a point I was like, OK, I love life choices, but I'm going to have to give it up. And in that meeting, I came in for a staff meeting and I was going to tell you and said I love you guys. I love what we do here, but I have to say goodbye. And you guys said, hey, before you leave, can we talk to you? And I was like, oh gosh, they're going to fire me before I can quit. And you guys. Speaker 1 I'm not putting this on my resume so. Speaker 3 I forget this ever happened and I you guys said the board has approved your position for full time and I said are you kidding? So that next week I put in my 2 week at my police job. I went to Guatemala for one of those weeks. Speaker 1 Came back, I remember being in such a pivotal moment because me and said knew we could see it. All these like light bulbs coming on for you and just you, you know, just bearing fruit and what you were doing. And it was like, man, we were in this place where we need to grow and knowing like, OK, I think Julia has the administration skill to do that. And it was a leap of faith for the board and for Sidney and I Not on you. We knew that you had it. But like, OK, like if we stretch our payroll to this point, well, but it's been so cool to watch. Like it's always when you step out of the boat, right? And you get to see God do a miracle through your life and like through life choices and people stepped up financially and all these different things. And so and it's just been amazing to watch you, you know, we we call it our you know our what do we call it? Gosh, I can't even think right now. Oh my gosh, the department. What do I always? Speaker 3 Say the scheduling. Speaker 1 Department. Oh, yeah. The scheduling department. Gosh, sorry. You're the third person I've talked to. It's like my, my words are starting to lose me. Leave me. Lose me. They're losing me. Yeah. The the scheduling department. It's Julia, he runs the front and you know, make sure like all of our clients, all the phones, you know, all the, you answer all the phones, you schedule all the appointments. You basically are air traffic control because we have license counselors coming in and you know, with Melissa doing all of her counseling and group counseling and postpartum counseling. And then you have Tori, he's doing all the education programs. So we have girls coming in, big classes going on. We have people shopping, we have just ultrasound and medical appointments happening. And then we have counseling. It's like there's a lot going on and you're like, I love when I see you in the morning. Do you like basically like, all right, girls, here's the plan for the day. He's confirmed he's not. And I just think it's so cool that the Lord trained you or you or where you do have to be direct and you do have to be on the phone and say, I'm so sorry I can't fit you in today, but I have to move your appointment to tomorrow or whatever that is. You know, try to help Tori not get rid of all the supplies and the boutique and be like, dude, have you checked the points? I try, but she's setting these ladies out like it's Christmas. Speaker 3 She's her own woman. Speaker 1 Oh, no, we love her. And, and I just think you do a really, really great job of keeping up with a lot of details, the details that really do matter because they impact how the client when they come in, that they can feel at ease, that they can feel heard and seen by whoever staff members going to be in front of them. And that does take attention to detail, you know, because we don't want them just to come in and like, OK, who's meeting with you? And when you know, you're keeping up with like all the protocol. And so that our other staff members can really just be in their sweet spot, meeting with the clients and only having to think about that, not having to think about what's their next step. It's I'm just with them in their moment of crisis or being overwhelmed. And when they come out, you're able to say gently, like, right, your next step. And you know, we'll meet see you back in two weeks or you're enrolled in education class. You're going to be here on Tuesday and just giving all the details. And I think you do that so graciously, but not only do you handle all the client side of things, you also work with partnerships with our or local churches and community members through volunteering and all of that. So you, you wear a few hats. And so, but yeah, so if you're not sitting with our clients, you're working with volunteers, what impact have you seen when people come in to volunteer with us? Speaker 3 So the first thing that we always like to do when we have a group of volunteers come in is take them on a tour. It's really amazing to just know the amount of people that either give monthly or they come in the front door to drop off baby blankets at their ladies ministry have made whatever the case is, it's so few times someone is like, yeah, I know, I know my way around like I've been in before. So my favorite thing to do is to really just start off kind of taking them them through an appointment. So we hold them in the lobby. I explain what happens in the lobby, we walk through the counseling rooms, the client advocate rooms, the nurses station, the ultrasound room. And I think the coolest, that's always my favorite part of the volunteer opportunity because you just see so many people enlightened about how much Life Choices does and how much Life Choices provides for ladies. Because they don't realize these people that are pro-life and they are so giving and so excited about what we do. They have no idea that a heart starts beating at the point of conception. And so when we tell them we see a girl at six weeks pregnant, we can see a baby and we can see a heart beating and measure that, they're completely surprised. They're completely taken aback and they think it's the coolest thing in the world. And then they're even more excited to go pack diapers or go hang up clothes in the boutique or help us sweep up the mess that parents and classmates. Speaker 1 Whatever. Speaker 3 The case is that's true. So I think just my favorite part is just seeing the the realization of the magnitude of what we do for our volunteers. Speaker 1 As you know, life choices have been around for 45 years. This past fall, we celebrated 45 years of ministry. I'm the 5th executive director. Some of our volunteers have been with us for 20 years. And volunteers may look different. That might be literally coming into the physical location and volunteering with us. But some women, like you were saying, knit blankets for us that go in our newborn baskets or they know, like their granddaughters, you know, or whatever, like had kids and like, hey, clean out those closets and I'll take it to life choices. Or maybe they've been a part of our baby bottle campaign where they take baby bottles and they fill them with change. And that's been a part of what they've always done with their local church to give back to their local pregnancy center. And so I think there's a lot of nostalgia because pregnancy centers just in our nation have been around since the 80s. They've started popping up so much then and then physically live choices has been there 45 years. So I like, I think you're absolutely right. So many people are like, oh, I know what y'all do, but I've actually never physically been in your building. We have a pediatrician that came and they drop off formula like all the time to us. And they had their, oh, I just hit their. Hit the thing, but they brought in their granddaughters the other day and they're little and I love that they're like, we want to see the place and they're like, well, we don't want to, you know, intrude on y'all and we're like, no. And I loved it was like the little kids curiosity to see everything like where do you put the formula? And you're like, well, come on in, I'll show you around. And so if you're listening and you live in the Faulkner County area and you're like, I know who life choices is and I didn't know I could just pop in. It's like just call. You can schedule an appointment with Julia and she'll take you on a tour. If you're giving away clothing or diapers or because some people like my kid outgrew these diapers. I only have like 30 left. Yeah, bring that. We'll use that. We will give that out. It's like, don't hide that away in a closet. Just get rid of it and we'll take it. But I think it's always cool. You're you're hitting it spot on when people really walk the grounds. And I feel like people always leave with like, it's so peaceful in here. It feels like a spa. And I'm just like, that is people covering this place in prayer. So even if volunteers are like prayer warriors for us, because there's when that girl is walking in or her boyfriend or husband's with her mom or grandma and that situation is walking through the door, they're walking in anything but peaceful. They are anxious, they are worried, they're fearful, they're shameful. Not everyone are feeling all of those, but some are collectively feeling every bit one of those things. And just so that the the fact that our building can feel peaceful and hopeful is nothing but prayer and God's presence being in the place going. I steal all of those nerves. I can steal that and bring peace to every circumstance. And so, yeah, what are ways that people can volunteer with us? Speaker 3 So right now our big push, what we've really fine-tuned since I've been on the team is diaper drives and diaper packing days. That is where you get with your group of friends, your church group, your ladies group. Whatever the case is, we really are always hurting for size 345 and six diapers. Speaker 1 Everyone thinks. Speaker 3 Newborn baby, I'll bring the newborn. Speaker 1 They're out of those diapers so quick. Speaker 3 I'll bring the ones, I'll bring the twos, and those are. Speaker 1 And our Mamas are so I would say frugal. Frugal there. I wear seems fancy, but like conservative and like just give me a little bit of bigger size diaper so that my baby can keep. It'll last me longer. Yeah. Speaker 3 So that is and then baby wipes, of course, all the time. But if you can collect those, get with your friend, we will get you on the calendar and we will set you up in the parenting classroom. We set you up with grocery bags. We pack them into bags of 40 because that's what Shout out Miss Judy has always done. Speaker 1 20 years of the. Speaker 3 Making 20 years of the making. Speaker 1 Well, diapers come in such weird things. So to be fair to everyone, because 1 pack of diapers can be 120 and then one little small pack of diapers can be 27. And so I love that Miss Judy's been a volunteer of ours for 20 years. She's like, we're just going to pull them all out and make 40 so that we're giving everyone gets the same amount and so. Speaker 3 It's a huge help. Speaker 1 Yeah, it's a huge help. Speaker 3 And that's, I mean, we just get together. I normally have music playing. We'll try to get some snacks. Yeah, we just packed diapers till 1. Speaker 1 Time you made some amazing hot chocolate. It was fire hot. Speaker 3 Absolutely. Speaker 1 So we do like to try to make it, you know, you are packaging diapers. It might feel like, oh, what impact is this really going to have? But when you see the grounds and you see the amount of women we're serving and how fast the diapers go, absolutely. Like we're always out of sight. Speaker 3 Always, I always tell volunteers like it might not seem like much, but as you're packing these, I my favorite thing to do, even during the week when we're packing them is just praying over each diaper, each bag and the mom that's going to put that on her baby and the baby that's going to be clothed in that and just praying for peace and just guidance and safety, right? And all the things because that is like, it might not seem like much, but it truly is a blessing. Speaker 1 Oh yeah, and those moms are coming in. Speaker 3 They come, Yeah, I mean. Speaker 1 All the time, all the time, needing diapers all the time. I mean, especially that newborn stage. You go through so many more than you think and then they grow faster than you think. But what I love most about our moms too is like if they ever have an oversupply or their kids grow out of something. Speaker 3 They're bringing them back. Speaker 1 I'm just like this. Speaker 3 Is a partial pack, but maybe you can put. Speaker 1 It on some others and I'm just like, wow, our moms are even the woman that we serve or so giving and they give back to you. They know how helpful and impactful it is for them and they're like, I can help another mom. I'm going to do it. Absolutely. I what's one thing is I think I skipped this question earlier, but what's one thing that has surprised you with working at a pregnancy center? Speaker 3 So I mean, honestly, everything I'm surprised by something new every single. Speaker 1 Day you're learning a lot about baby development all the. Speaker 3 Things I've helped 2 babies this week and they did not cry. Speaker 1 Oh, look at. Speaker 3 She That is a huge joke. Yeah, I think for me, just the sheer amount of women who are pregnant and need help. Speaker 1 Yeah. Speaker 3 It's there's so many, you know, like I grew up back home, like we did the baby bottle fundraiser in the springtime or at the beginning of the year, you know, like it's going to a pregnancy Resource Center. I had no idea what y'all did. Like I've always felt passionately, you know, the whole movement, the whole conservative movement of pro-life, you know, and we're all rejoicing Christians as a whole or rejoicing like when Roe V Wade is overturned, all these things. Yeah, that's a blessing. That's great. So what are we doing for the women on the front lines? What are we doing to equip them? What are we doing to love on them? Yeah, we're saving lives, but at what cost? Because we're just saving the life, the the life of the baby to save the life of the baby. Like how are we impacting positively or showing God's love to the mom who has to carry that baby and then care for that baby? So I knew that pregnancy resource centers were a thing and I honestly had no idea. Just the wide range of what we do. That's the material, it's the medical, it's the emotional, like anything that we any need that we can meet, we're meeting. And then girls are just, I mean, pretty much knocking the door down to get in. And, you know, like we are changing some protocol and trying to get our ducks in a row to change some things around. But at one point we're scheduling a month and a half now. And that is? Speaker 1 I remember the day I have to tell this story. I'm like, hey, we've implemented some new systems, Julia, let's slow down it on how many girls were taking in a day because we we did a huge leap of growth. We were going for maybe 5 or 6 girls a day to sometimes with classes and counseling and all that. We'll have 12 to 15 women walking in 20 sometimes a day. And so I was like, hey, let's just kind of slow it down. Like so everyone can really learn where what goes where. Because we were doing some changes in our protocol on just how we follow up with our clients, but also how we keep track of where they're at in the system so that no one falls through the cracks. And she was like, Miss Jess, we can't, we can't. And I was like, what do you mean? She's like, I'm already scheduling people a month out. And when you are working in, in an arena where people are calling because they're in crisis, they're feeling like they're drowning, you don't say one a month, I'll save you. Or like in a month I'll send you a float. Speaker 3 Just tread for now. Tread and just keep treading. I'll come by with a boat when I can. Speaker 1 Yeah, in a month. And you're like, I'm not going to survive this. And so we've had to change things to meet that growth. And I think that's been shocking to me too, honestly, when I got into this world, I've been in the nonprofit sector for, gosh, 15 years. I've seen a gamut of things and resources being handed out and a slew of people who maybe even take that resource for granted. And like, but shifting that all like motherhood and pregnancy and how intimate that season is and how much a woman's body is changing and a life is growing in her and how holy and sacred and, you know, just relational because they're in such a vulnerable state. I have never experienced ministry really like this So up close and personal, you know, because we're seeing literally inside them. Like we're doing ultrasounds and we're seeing their baby growing in the heartbeat. We're saying, do you have a baby bed? And like learning what's going on in their in their homes and like what they really do like to make sure baby's safe with well, here's a baby bed and here's a car seat and here's diapers for hygiene and them going in and shopping for the first time and picking out their outfit for their kids. Sometimes that takes them months. Like I there was a story of a girl saying I didn't go into the store, a little boutique to shop until I was like 8 months pregnant. And then it all got real. I'm like 8 months pregnant. You were like about to pop, you know? And I'm like, but that was the moment she picked out her outfit for her little girl and she was like, I really am pregnant. I'm really having a baby. And I was like, the light bulb came on. But we're holding their hand tenderly through all of that until that baby is actually here. And then it's like, now it's time to champion you. You're going to run this race. You're going to be tired. You're going to be weary. And we're going to be there to like, lift your arms. We're going to provide resources. We're going to encourage you. We're not done with you yet. And like, gosh, so we can continue to grow our programming until that baby is five and they're going to kindergarten. That man, that would be goals, you know, because kids grow like weeds. I know you're learning that they're like, Oh my gosh, you're going to be more close. Yes, that we are. Yes, we are. OK, so let's jump back into like, what would you want a volunteer to know? If they feel intimidated, if they're listening to like Tori talk or Melissa talk and they're like, I'm a licensed counselor or I can come in and teach or I have this skill set. What would you say to the volunteer that's like, no, not me, but they feel their heart racing, you know, they're like, Oh my gosh, maybe the Lord's talking to me, but not me. I. Speaker 3 Would say yes, you absolutely do. Yeah. There's never enough volunteers. There's never enough for too much. We all, we kind of talked about this at the beginning. We all wear so many hats, and that's what it takes to make this place run. And that's a blessing that everyone is flexible enough to be willing to do that. But knowing that we have the support and the backup is a blessing in itself. So if you think know you, yes, you. If you have a day off and you're willing to spend it with us, just come in. Just stop by, come introduce yourself, set something up or don't. If you're passing by, walk in. We there will be someone to talk to you. You might have to wait. Speaker 1 Just a second. Speaker 3 In the lobby and play with the baby in the lobby. That's totally that might happen but we are never not wanting help so don't be intimidated. We are just normal people. You walk into the lobby, there's normally cements unless the the kids, the kids like to run by and eat them like candy. There's normally some mint. Sit down, have a mint. We have the Christian. I have the instrumental Christian lofi music. Speaker 1 Playing. Speaker 3 It's a vibe like just chill out, introduce yourself and like just dive in. Just you just got to do it. There's no, there's no embarrassment. We're not, you know, we might ask you some questions, like, I mean, you're crazy. We might want you up in there, but like, if you're seeking the word, if you're walking with him, if you're passionate about it, don't be intimidated. You, I promise you can't know less than I did when I started. And if you don't know, we'll teach. Speaker 1 You. Yeah. I love this question for you because you are young. You know, some people would say, oh, my gosh, she's, you know, just 22 and she's already doing this big work, you know, or like, I'm intimidated and I'm in my 50s or whatever. So for the girl, the woman you know, or the OR a guy, because my gosh, we need someone to volunteer. I get asked all the time, what do you do for the dads? I'm like, yeah, they're showing up. There's some guys that were in parenting class and they were doing yoga and the instructor made the guys do it. And I thought that was so funny. So we even need guys like we could we could dream there could be a fatherhood program. We need the father back in the home. So if any of those people are listening and they feel unqualified, what would you say to them? Like I'm too young or they're they're, they're counting themselves out. Speaker 3 Don't count yourself out. When I toured, I wanted to count myself out. When I started, I had to Google where a uterus was. Yeah, Like I thought I'm. I mean, I was 21 when I started. I had to Google where a uterus was. I thought only women had pelvises. I didn't know that was like. Speaker 1 Back in the basement. Speaker 3 I didn't know everyone had that, you know, like I was a history and language arts girl, not a science girl, like. Speaker 1 Oh my gosh, I'm in here listening to heartbeats every day at work. Cool. Speaker 3 There is no such thing as unqualified. You might not be a counselor, you might not be a parenting class teacher, but you can go buy a diaper. You can go over love on a girl. You can come in and love on a girl. You can help her pick stuff out in the boutique. If you're a man and you just want to get plugged in, you can come get on a lawn. Speaker 1 Mower. Speaker 3 Lawn care Lawn care rotation. Speaker 1 You take Sydney's husband's job or he comes and mows our. Speaker 3 Yard. Absolutely. Speaker 1 You can help. Speaker 3 Him when our sink claws you can come fix that so I don't have. Speaker 1 To you can come. Speaker 3 Volunteer in our warehouse. You can do. You can hang. Speaker 1 A photo for us because we're in there trying to do it ourselves. Speaker 3 Listen, I. Speaker 1 We're all girl staff. We need some men. I. Speaker 3 Mean I have my little drill, but I mean yeah. Speaker 1 Please do it for me. Speaker 3 Please do it for me and a patch a hole in the wall. Speaker 1 Exactly. Speaker 3 Like there's there truly is no such thing as unqualified. Exactly like what Tori said. God doesn't call. I've heard it. God doesn't call the equipped. He equips the call. He doesn't call the qualified. He qualifies the call. He will if that is where you're meant to be, if you're feeling drawn, if you're feeling LED, the Lord will provide that vision and that education along the way and you will learn. I mean you can come help fold clothes and hang them up like there's. Speaker 1 Endless opportunities. I tell people that all the time. Like if you love to shop, every time you're at Target, buy a $10 pack of diapers, drop it by like every Sunday my mom goes to Walmart. I'm like, then every time you're at Walmart, say I'm going to give back and buy a dollar, you know, $2.00 pack of wipes. It's like you can collect that all month and then bring it by like once. It could be part of your normal life routine where you're constantly thinking of a mom and a child who really needs support. I think people don't understand that there's, yes, there's the poverty side of things, there's the financial lack that yes, they're in here for, but that's the relational lack mostly. Like if you've had a baby shower, you are blessed. If you have friends to call that rejoice when you're pregnant, you are blessed. If you have a church community who's praying over you, you are blessed. These are things that even myself took for granted that I'm like these women do not have. And I know that's some things that we're dreaming about is how do we provide baby showers for these moms? How can we just champion them? Because they're choosing life. They could take the easier way out. They could go and choose to end this child's life. They could do that easily through the abortion pill. They can do that easily by paying $650 and no one ever has to know. But they're going, no, I'm going to overcome. I'm going to choose live. I'm going to walk this out. I'm going to be ashamed. I'm going to be talked about. I'm going to be maybe laughed about because this is my 4th or 5th kid and I still can't get it together. Like I can't get it. I have 3, three other baby daddies. Like they have every reason because they're being, they are the outcast and we run into the outcast and say, hey, I don't care. It reminds me of the woman in the well, like Jesus sits with her. He was like, tell me about your life. She starts telling everyone about his life. He's like, hold up. I think you're missing some things. Like I think you've had more husbands than you're accounting for. And she's like, oh, you all my business now. And this is often what we do to our women. Like, oh, you're in my business now. And it's like, yeah, this 1 + 1 is not I adding up to two. We have hard conversations with our women because we're in deep enough relationship at that point. And but we're seeing women's lives transform where she gets to run back with full dignity, full hope, full joy and say I just encountered the Messiah. Like he saved me. He knew me. He knew that like parts of me, no one else knew, the parts that people did know that shame me and that cast me out that I'm I'm having to choose to go in the heat of the day to get water when no one else is there. And that's a lot of why when women are walking in our doors, they're coming in the heat of the moment and they're coming alone because no one else is there. And so I just hope and pray that as we, you know, come to a close and if you feel inspired and you are not even in Arkansas, like where we're located, you're not even in Faulkner County, there's pregnancy centers all over. Just Google it. People just promise you, you're going. It's going to pop up and just go be a part of being a part of a woman's life. And so I'm just so excited for today's conversation. I think it's important that we remember what pregnancy centers do. They all do things differently. Ours we we really do focus on the dignity of the woman. We want to focus on her mental health. We want to focus that she has the resources. We don't just want a woman to have a baby. And then it's here earthside and then DHS is involved. And now that we're flooding the foster care system, we want to bring in systems that break the cycle. We want to make sure that we bring in Jesus and hope so we can break generational patterns. We want to launch this woman and her child to have the most successful life that they can because they're going to. They are created and knitted and put here on this earth for a purpose and a plan. And we wholeheartedly believe that Jesus designed every person and they have a story. And so I'm just so thankful for our team. I'm thankful for the way that they serve and if this inspired you, I just pray that you and I'm going to trust that you'll do something about it. That you'll pray that you'll ask the Lord if I'm supposed to be a part, whether that's financially that you'll write the check that you'll be obedient. Maybe if you're like, I know I can pick up a pack of diapers. That seems so simple. I can go to my church and then rally and say, hey, girls, we can put together and gather P JS and drop it off like the smallest of things can make the biggest wake of impact. But I will tell you doing nothing will continue to do nothing. And so you have to be a part if you want women to carry life. If that is a core conviction in your heart, I would say don't just champion it. Don't just post it on social. Don't just say in an elect an official because they have that same stance. I would actually really challenge you to roll up your sleeves and be a part of that woman. Choosing life and all the other things are important. But once she chooses life, are you there to stand in the gap of whatever that gap may be, whether that's relationally or resourcefully? Is there a lack in her life that you can truly step in and fill that gap? And so, yeah, our prayer for you today as we close this series within our podcast is that you felt educated along the way every episode, or maybe this is the first one you're tuning in, that you would go back and listen to the others, but that you would feel upheld in this moment. That's our hope is that everyone would be uphold and equipped and empowered to live on mission for whatever the Lord has for you. And if we have helped you, equipped you, our next step is we hope we empower you to run your race, that God's marked out for you. So we'll see you back on our next season come fall. But this is the Uphold Her podcast, and we're so thankful you joined us.