243: The People Are Ill..?

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I'm ready. Where's my mug gone? Is this thing on? My hair is doing something crazy today. Why? I don't know. I just don't like it. I keep, it's one of those days where I wish it back and forth and front and back and ponytail and up and down. I don't know if you've ever noticed that fidget of me, but some days they're really, it's really obvious. No, my eyes, like I cannot stop messing with my hair and head lately. Like I was editing last week's episode, you guys, and like literally I'm just like, stop touching your hair. I'm like, why? I know. I don't even watch. I don't even watch them back because I'm like, I don't want to watch myself do my little like any type of repetitive fidgets. Yeah. Yeah. But I don't know. But here we are. Here we are. Here we are. We've got a really good theme today, I think. Hi. Hello. Welcome back to another episode of Two Hot Takes. I'm your host, Morgan. Joined by. Lauren. I did that with a guest today and they looked at me like, what, what is that noise? Oh, usually don't break it out for the strangers, but I can't believe you did that for a stranger. I thought that was like for, I thought it was special, but yeah, no, it is special each and every time. Okay. But yeah, I don't know what, what was I just, what was I saying? It's one of those days, you know, but I think it's going to be a good episode. When we recorded the bruh theme, bruh, bruh, you had a line in there and you were like, the people, the people are ill. And that has stuck with me. I'm like, oh, thank God. I don't have to think of a theme. Yeah. So good. So that's our theme today. The people are ill slash like, are the people ill question mark or who is ill? Which person in the story is ill? Is anyone ill? I don't know. Just a bunch of chaos all across the board. Some new, some old, some updates, some no updates. It's going to be a surprise roulette, rapid fire. I've got options. I've got some gross stuff. You will see poop. You will hear poop. You not see it. You won't see it, but you'll hear it. You'll hear about it. We don't have pictures. Oh my God. I don't think I'll refresh, but it's going to be a really fun episode. And I, I got a glass of wine for the first episode in like three months. Wow. I don't think we've had wine on the show. You're not having wine. Lauren's still doing her whole 30, whole 60 now because it's past 30. She's just Well, yeah, I have broken the whole 30 and I wasn't exactly sure how I wanted to do it. Cause I was slowly introducing foods. And then unfortunately I went to a friend's giving a lot of dairy and There was just so many beautiful foods and wine. And I was like, you know what? So did that. And then as you should now I'm kind of like back, um, trying to still do whole 30 and then kind of like or just see how foods make me feel. So it's, it's still happening. It's just not as strict as it was. Yeah. Yeah. It's good to figure out what your body needs and doesn't need. And yeah. What, what makes you feel good? I, speaking of poop. Oh, let's go back to that. Let's circle back. I, it's funny that you're talking, that you accidentally said you guys will see poop because I have to take a picture of your poop and send it to someone. No. Oh, but thanks for giving everyone that vision. Well, sometimes you have to do that with a dog. No, I did not do that. Um, but I watched this video last night where this woman pretended that she had pooped in a Tupperware in a car and gave it to her husband and his reaction. I don't think it was a fake. Like, I think it was a genuine reaction and I couldn't stop laughing. Like I need to see that. I know. I want you to like insert it. I want to do this to Justin. You should. What did she use? A tootsie roll? No. So she used an actual, um, like toy piece of poop. Like you can order online. Yeah. And then she put Nutella on top of it and then she sprayed it with this like spray. That's like for pranks. It's, it's like poop spray and she sprayed it in this Tupperware. Oh, the fart spray. Yeah. And then she goes, she closes it. And then, um, she goes, honey, I'm gonna use the bathroom before we like leave like one second. And then she gets back in the bathroom and she goes, here, hold this. And he's like, I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. What is this? And she's like, what's my poop? Duh. And he's like, why would you poop in this? And then she ends up being like, it's not a big deal. And she opens it and puts it on his shirt. And that's when he lost his mind. And I was rolling laughing. God, she's ill. She is ill in the best way. I love her. I love, yeah. I'm like usually not a prank person, but the one where mom or dad or whoever will be on the toilet and be like, can you bring me toilet paper? And it's like their little toilet paper. And I'm like, I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't two-year-old or something like gets them toilet paper. Five-year-old, six-year-old, whatever. They have Nutella or fake poop on their hand. And so as they reach for the toilet paper roll, they smear poop on the kid. Oh my God. Yes. Yeah. And the kids just, their reactions are so good. Some of them instantly lose it. Some of them are like, it's okay, mommy. Oh, like so good. So good. So maybe I'm okay with some pranks. I think pranks are hilarious. Like just, not ones that are mean, the crazy ones that are like, ha ha. Like, oh, I had an insane one. Really? It's on next week's episode. It's horrible. Oh my gosh. Horrible. I guess I got to listen in. Got to tune in. Yeah. THT listener. Let's see who's ill or not ill. I don't know. Let's dive in. Let's do it. Let's do it. That felt nice. That did feel nice. I don't know what is happening here today. We'll see. I think we should actually start off each episode that way. Oh no, I lost it. That one was good. I've been hearing a lot of like, what is like the vagus nerve or something. Yeah. I think that it healed it. Just now. Just now? Yes. Flex your foot a couple of times. That also can help with your vagus nerve and nervous system. Wow. I always do that. That's good to know. If you're like really stressed. That's going to be my new fidget. Or if you go push up against a wall really hard, that helps with like deep joint stimulation and that calms your nervous system. But you have to like push really hard into a wall. I like doing the arm in the doorway thing. Yep. Same thing. That's- Oh my God. I haven't done that in a very long time and I need to. And if anyone hasn't somehow done this before, go in your doorframe, put your arms on either side and like for, I'd say, give it at least 60 seconds. Full 60 seconds, push out as hard as you possibly can. And then magic happens. Truly, truly, I was about to say Harry Potter style. And then magic happens and truly like your arms float. Like I'm not kidding. They literally float. It's the craziest magic. Yeah. It's like that one thing. I don't know if anyone did this as kids. You'd have to like put your two fingers together and then your friends- And would like keep tying knots, invisible knots over your fingers. Whoa, no. And then as you pull them away, it, like, is really hard. You feel like you have, like, you're tied. Really? Yeah. I got to try that one. I'll do it to you after. Let's get into these stories, though. This first one, coming from our very own Tuatake subreddit, 15 hours old. My coworker secretly used my face in her vision board relationship collage, and I don't know how to act normal now. This is going to sound insane, but I swear I'm not exaggerating. I, 28 female, work in a small office. One of my coworkers, 30 female, is very into manifestation, crystals, aligning energies, all of that. She's nice, a bit intense, but harmless. Or so I thought. Last Friday, we had a casual team lunch. Someone jokingly mentioned vision boards, and she lit up immediately. She said she actually brought hers because she wanted to update the universe during break. Everyone just laughed. She pulled it out, and that's when I saw it. There was a whole romance collage, candles, beach sunsets, champagne glasses, and in the middle was a cutout photo of my face. My face. So weird. And next to it, a torso of some random shirtless guy, with his head cut out from the picture. I froze. My other coworker saw it too, and literally choked on her water. She tried to cover it up by saying, oh, no, no, no, it's just an energy representation. But guys, it was my actual LinkedIn photo. Printed, cut out, glued next to half a man. She kept trying to explain, saying things like, it's not literally you, it's the energy you give me. And you attract what I want to attract. Everyone got super uncomfortable and quietly changed the subject. I could barely finish eating because my heart was in my throat. I don't know how to look her in the eyes on Monday. What do you even say? Is this harassment? Is it delusion? Am I overreacting? I feel violated and also weirdly guilty for feeling violated. This is the most bizarre situation I have ever been in. Any advice is welcome because I genuinely have no idea how to handle this. Without making work 10 times more awkward. I think all of those feelings are very valid to that. I don't feel like I'm going to have good advice here because I'm like a weirdo. And I would be like, I'm so flattered. I did make one of these vision boards in. And my face was on it? It was not. No, I didn't put myself on it. At all. But I did cut out a picture of John. What's his last name? He's from The Office. He's Emily Blunt's husband. Yeah, I forget too. But he's such a cutie. He was cute. He was in this magazine. I had limited magazines to work with. It was for, I don't know, something in grad school. And we had to create a vision board. And at that time, I was single. I wanted love. I wanted to find my person. Don't let Justin edit this. And I literally. No, he's seen it. He's seen the vision board. Because it was shortly before meeting him. And I put this dark-haired dude on it. Kind of like a similar look. I don't know. And I put New Flame at the top. Kaczynski. Sorry. Yes. Yes, John. Yeah. And so that, it's like. Sorry, Emily Blunt, if you're listening. But that's someone who's unattainable and not in my circle. Yeah. But I do think it's kind of odd that she printed. This picture from her co-worker's LinkedIn. And then got so excited to whip out this manifestation vision board. If I did that and I knew I put my co-worker's face on it, that thing would be sitting at home. It's like, it's almost like a weird voodoo doll. And I don't, like, obviously this is in the theme just because it's super weird. Maybe she's dealing with a little bit of delusion. I don't know. But, like, I think overall it is just odd behavior. I don't know if I'm just like. It is definitely odd. It is definitely odd behavior, 100%. Yeah. But, like, her reason that she came up with, I don't know if I'm just that gullible. But I'm like, oh, okay, like, that tracks. Yeah. But, like, I haven't heard that with a vision board where you put somebody else's face. Because I. Her response, if it's not true, was quick. Because it's like, okay, you see somebody that, like, attracts all these type of men that you want. How do you embody that type of energy in order to get the type of. Men that you want to be attracted to you, too, and to chase you, too? That explanation, I'm like, that doesn't feel like it's an impossible thing for her to do. But also it's like when you do a vision board, like, it should be all focused on you, you would think. So it seems odd to post about somebody else. Like, that almost feels like envy or, like, jealousy. But I don't know. I'm not really down. I don't really know a lot about those type of the vision board lifestyle. I did, however, buy a book off of, like, TikTok shop or something of, like, a vision board material. And I just, like, look through it in the morning because it's, like, so pretty and, like, fun little quotes. I like that. But, like, you're supposed to, like, cut stuff out and then, like, make a board with it. Yeah. But right now I just like it as a book. That's okay. Anyway. Use it how you want. Long story short, this is totally fair to be very creeped out. And I'm thinking. I completely just forgot. Like, was like. And then she was like, oh, my God, this is so embarrassing. I forgot that I put a co-worker on here. Poor thing. If that's the case, poor thing. And then the other option is that she could be a huge creep. Well, I think. That's a possibility. It's hard because it's like you cut out my head, put it on a picture of a woman, and then next to the woman is a man without a head. Whose head is supposed to be on that man? Yeah. Who? Who? Who? Who? Like, does she just. Maybe she doesn't care about, like, the head. She doesn't care about the hair color. She just wants the abs and the pecs. She just likes the nips. Oh, no. I also think, like, say I was making a vision board and it's like, I want to embrace, like, Alejandra's work drive and your kindness and, like, all of that. I would put you on my vision board, but, like. Like, we're friends. We're close. And, like, that would be a more, like, explainable thing. But, like, you could also just add the words, like, kindness and, like, heart. Like, I don't know. But. But that's what I was saying. Because they're not close. Right. But that's what I'm saying is, like, I don't fully understand, like, that when people are into, like, that lifestyle, like, it goes deep, right? Like, and they're really about energy. So, like. Yeah. Writing down kindness versus writing down, you know, what you think somebody else embodies. Like, I feel like you. Like, writing down, like, I want good work ethic or putting Alejandra. When you think about Alejandra, you actually can, like, see it and feel it and, like, the energy. You know that she's, like. When you see, like, hardworking, good work ethic, like, I don't know if you really feel it and believe it as much as when you see a person that you're, like, that's inspirational. Like, she's a badass walking down the streets of NYC. Like, you know what I mean? Like. Okay, so maybe not that weird. I don't know. I don't want to make excuses if it's. Maybe not that weird, but. Maybe not. I don't know. I'm really curious what everyone's takes on this one is. I'm a little bit lost. I don't know. I guess maybe not bad intentions, but don't whip it out at work in order to update the universe during break. And, like, I fully am on board with manifestation, crystals, aligning energies, whatever. Like, I think that shit is so cool. I do, too. I just don't know much about it. I don't know that much, either. Like, I love getting my tarot read. Literally, Martina read. My tarot and Justin's tarot, like, a couple weeks before he proposed. And, like, the tarot was on, like, saying. Proposal. So, I do believe in that stuff. Justin's like, gotta move up the proposal. He. No, afterwards we talked about it. Yeah. And he goes, yeah, no, I felt that. It was so crazy. Yeah. It's awesome. But it's just maybe not the time or place to expose your vision board in this way. No. And, like, I don't blame OP for feeling violated. Like, going on to somebody. Somebody's LinkedIn and printing out a photo of them and then seeing it somewhere. I don't know. Like, that I do understand that that would feel really odd. Let's get into the comments. Okay. Top comment. I'd start keeping that energy representation to myself and limit your interactions with her. And inform your boss of her weird stalkery vibe. Which I don't know if you can say that in an HR meeting. But someone else responds to that and goes, Cosign. Document everything. Send a short bounder email. Like, please remove my image from your materials and do not use my likeness going forward. Then loop in your manager in HR so the request is on record. If she brings it up again, reply only in writing. So, these people are taking, like, a very professional approach. Like, hey, it's at least, at the bare minimum, kind of inappropriate for work. Yeah. Which, legally, like, I don't know. Like, I think people. Do you remember those hear-me-out cakes? Yes, yeah. Like, it's almost, like, in that weird way where it's, like, you printed off pictures of your coworkers and then, like, made a hear-me-out cake. but you're on a vision board instead. But wasn't hear me out like supposed to be like, they're gross, but I'd still hit? Yeah. Like that's like super like harassment. It's worse. Yeah, I guess it's way worse. And so people were getting fired for the cakes. Good. It's like so ridiculous. No, it's bad. But I'm like, could you get in trouble for printing out your co-worker's picture on LinkedIn and putting it on your vision board? I wonder if that's like an actual offense. I don't know. It doesn't feel like it unless it was repetitive. Like I feel like a one-time thing doesn't feel, but here's the thing is that bottom line is that OP feels really uncomfortable and you shouldn't feel uncomfortable in your place of work. So I agree that actions do need to be taken, like set boundaries, make sure you notify your manager, like all of those things should, I agree with all of that. Because in your place of work, like you deserve to have that like feeling comfortable. Absolutely. And people, people do start to get a little nervous in the comments. I mean, people are like, she's not trying to attract your energy. She's trying to be you. There's a weird envy or somehow a delusion vibe there. And it's going to get worse if no one checks it, to be honest. Well, like I, we don't have enough like background information to confirm that that's going on, right? Like does OP add any, any other like moments where she's felt like this person is stalking her? Or is this the one thing? We don't have any comments from OP. Yeah. See, I was just, I wouldn't like be convinced of that from just this story. It is definitely a possibility. It could be innocent. I'm curious to see what everyone else thinks. Yeah. But we are going to move along. I don't know if you saw me earlier when you were like saying some have updates, some don't have updates. I did like the emoji teary eyes. I think face like my face was smiling and I instantly was like, what, what, what? Well, we'll see. We'll see what ones coming up have updates. What if you had to pick, would you say this person is ill or was innocent? I would say I'm going to give the benefit of the doubt and say, hey, there's good intentions here, but maybe this person doesn't really understand like social norms. And just like doesn't understand how this could be coming across to other people. Like I do think like the explanation was like almost too quick for it to be a lie. Yeah. So maybe she looks at her coworker and is like, she's got a lot of friends at work. People like her. She does well. I'd love to embrace that. Yeah. Embody that type of vibe. I'm going to go glass half full, but I could be off. I could be off. Okay. So this next one is coming from our two, I take subreddit 22 hours old. Titled I ghosted my boyfriend after I found out who he really was. Nobody knew why. And I think people thought I was weird for a long time. Hello, Morgan. I'm a huge fan and your show saves me during my work commutes. I figured since I listened so much, I should contribute. Here is my story. I 30 female had just started dating a really nice guy, 40 male. We were on one of our first dates having a great time. He was concerned about me. Considerate fun seemed like a really good person. At one point during our conversation, he told me he was once married and has since divorced. He also told me his ex-wife later passed away from cancer. At this point, I felt a cold wash of dread start from the top of my head down to my toes because when he first asked me out, I thought he looked slightly familiar. I figured out after he told me of his former marriage, he was the one who used to come to my place of employment with his then wife. I work in healthcare and we watched over time how he abandoned her during her treatment when it got in the way of his social life. How she had to deal with everything on her own during her final months. He divorced her in her most vulnerable time. He was the worst. I hated him. And now he was sitting in front of me at dinner. And I wanted nothing more than to smash his pasta dish in his face. Shut up. But I was also really stupid and couldn't bring myself to break up with him right away. We went on some more dates and each time I tried to reconcile who I knew he was with who he appeared to be. But I couldn't do it anymore. As someone who loves to avoid confrontation, I slowly pulled a Homer Simpson and faded gently into the bushes. He eventually got the hint something wasn't right. When I wasn't responding to his calls or messages and broke up with me via email. To this day, I wonder what he thought happened. I know his friends thought I was a horrible person for just up and disappearing. Many of his social circle were not around during his marriage. I couldn't just tell him I thought he was a terrible person who abandoned his dying wife. He definitely did not remember me from my past workplace. I was a student and didn't do the main interacting with them. Should I have said anything or made up a reason? He has since married and I feel terrible for his wife. What if she got sick? But I also couldn't really say anything because it's also partially patient confidentiality. People think he is great. They think I'm the kind of person who ghosts dates. It's been years since this happened and I still reel over how I dodged a bullet. How wonderful and kind he seemed and how terrible his past history was. There's a lot of illness here. In more ways than one. Genuine illness. Someone dealing with cancer. Is there anyone else that's ill in this story? I thought she said boyfriend. Ghosted boyfriend. That was the title. Ghosted my boyfriend. But then it sounded like she had only gone on a few dates with him so I'm a little bit confused there. Maybe boyfriend is used a little looser than you would use it. But like. Like if that's the case, I'm like, why would you even spend a second worrying if somebody's thinking you're weird for ghosting someone? Like, whether we like it or not, it happens all the time. It's not like. I mean, I don't think she's ill. Yeah, no, no, no, I know. But I'm just wondering why she's even worried about what other people think. What other people think? I don't know. Maybe like they run in a small social circle. But like, if that's the case, I don't know. Sometimes I think a little gossip is healthy. I think it's okay to tell people, like, oh, no, like I ghosted him because I recognized him from years ago when he abandoned his sick wife. Right. And that's why, like, OP. I feel like that would have been fine. I wish OP said that to him. Like, just to see his face, even. Yeah, and just to like be kind of called out. Like, he should. It was bad behavior. He should face that. It's really sad. It really is heartbreaking. And, you know, that. I think we've talked about this before, but that stat where it's like. Yeah. If a woman in a marriage gets ill, the husband is likely to leave, whereas if it's the other way around, the wife is likely to stay and support the husband through it. So it's just like, it's one of those moments where it just makes you really sad to, like, hear confirmation of that happening. I know. It's like, you didn't beat the odds. You, like, literally fed into that stat. Yeah. I can't, like. I can't even imagine. Like, it doesn't matter. I love Justin so much that, like, I can't even, like, put myself in this headspace. But, like, no matter what went wrong, it doesn't matter how much I disliked him. He didn't even, like, sound like he disliked her. I mean, I don't know. It's like, were there other issues and then she got sick and it made it worse? Or truly was it because she got sick? Yeah. And his social life was impacted? Like, genuinely. Because this is an outsider looking in. Exactly. But that's what it looks like. That's what it looks like. Is it a duck? Is that what it is? But, like, I can't imagine ever abandoning someone who's dying. Or who's sick. You don't know if she's dying. Maybe he did know she was terminal. Like, I can't imagine that. Like, it's so sad. Yeah. I think, like, and I was thinking about that, too, because it's like, we don't know what was going on behind the scenes. Like, I don't know. Like, what, yeah, what if they were about to get a divorce and then she got sick and so he was like, I'm going to stay with you and help you. But it just got to the point where I don't know. Too much. Yeah. And, like, even then I still feel that way. Like, it still is really sad. Someone that you love to, like, let them go through it on their own like that. Even if you guys are not together romantically, like, you, I would just still hope that, like, somebody that you decide you care about enough to marry would want to stay by your side. Yeah. So, like, that still, that still sucks. But, again, we don't know all the details. I think Opie didn't do anything wrong. Yeah. I wish Opie would have said it so that we could have saw his face. Yeah. I want that shocked Pikachu meme. Him. I don't know what that is. What? It sounds really cute. You've never seen shocked Pikachu? Is it a new thing or an old thing? I feel like it's been around for a while. Oh, they call him surprised Pikachu in the meme. Surprised Pikachu. Oh, I love Pikachu. I just want to see his face when he gets called out. Yeah, I know that face. I just didn't know that was, like, a thing. Oh, my God. How have you never seen this? Wow. Yeah, I don't know. I don't know, you're not ill, OP, don't. fret about this thank you for sharing because this is like some serious tea but um oh my god i already forgot that it was actually like a write-in it's one of us it's one of ours our little babies yeah no this is this is crazy i think he's a little sick in the head for doing that to someone he supposedly loved and cared about in sickness and in health and also i yeah i mean who cares if his friends think it's weird that you ghosted him like it's it's fine fuck his friends too yeah okay number three i have a real good feeling about this one this is coming from our very own too hot takes subreddit we are three for three on too hot take stories right now first second third too hot takes baby nice fam it is titled my brother-in-law just moved in and hates my favorite artist oh no hey hey too hot takes fam longtime listener first time poster i love this community and the advice is always stellar so i'm hoping y'all will be able to help me my partner male 23 and i non-binary 25 are huge swifties i was literally gonna i was gonna use a story anyway continue but yeah we same same i feel i i feel your pain already we own every vinyl almost all of the vinyl we own almost all of the cardigans have her on almost all of our playlists what can i say she really does have a song to fit all my vibes and i even went to the eras tour recently my partner's brother male 22 fell on hard times we moved away about six months ago and are renting a very small two-bedroom house 12 hours away about four months ago my partner's brother was kicked out of their family home by their mom long story but she's a real piece of work and moved in and she's a real piece of work with his partner that didn't work out so well either it was a rural area decently far from the family and he wasn't able to find a job after almost two months he missed his car payments lost his car and then also got kicked out of there we've all been friends for years so we offered him our extra room to help him get on his feet a little bit he's been here for about three weeks now and has found decent employment and has been a good help around the house when he moved up here we knew it would be a drain on our resources he had zero dollars to his name and a huge adjustment for us but we didn't anticipate any huge issues now everything is coming to a head with taylor swift's new album coming out he's really amped up on his hatred for her okay i would know he's out we can't listen to her in the car watch any interviews tiktoks etc in the living room are you kidding me that contain her play any of our vinyls or talk about her even to each other without him blowing up i totally get she's not for everyone and i respect that i have friends and family who don't like her music at all and it doesn't bother me not liking her music is different than hating her i can totally understand that this guy sucks ungrateful weirdo but my brother-in-law all caps hates her in my opinion an amount for a person you've never met i feel like i'm not allowed to even exist in my own home without inciting an argument on the rare occasion i do play a handful of taylor swift songs he makes it a miserable experience between slamming doors stomping around and making nasty comments oh my god he's out i would kick him out so fast he's even interrupted my partner's work he works from home to rant about her and send several fake news articles about her he's even interrupted my most recently tonight my partner and i were cuddled up on the couch while eating dinner watching the tiktoks i've sent him and there were a few three containing her songs his brother came down to grab food we don't always eat together hung out for five minutes heard two tiktoks with her music then got up huffed and stomped made a few comments i couldn't catch under his breath threw his dinner in the trash and threw his utensils into the sink i can't even listen to this like i'm so mad my heart's racing loud enough that it made me jump and then he stormed upstairs we've tried to talk to him about it and say that he doesn't need to like her but he needs to respect that we do and learn to tolerate her music in the house we're not asking for listening parties or anything crazy we've been pretty mindful more than i'm comfortable with about playing her music or talking about her when he's anywhere near however i don't think it's unreasonable to say that we'd like to be able to have a glass of wine and pop an album on once a week or something after a rough week in our house where he's living rent free currently we pay for everything including his weed oh my god i've even tried to listen to his favorite artist pointing out that until that exact moment he never even had an idea i can't stand them either i've let him play their music talk about them relentlessly watch interviews whatever and i've kept my mouth shut because i don't see the point in ruining his joy over 10 minutes of my unhappiness it obviously didn't change anything aka why i'm posting here the constant negativity and shitting on something i enjoy has really been getting to me i've noticed i'm increasingly more irritable and on edge i don't even want to be around him right now i don't know where to go from here or how to fix it he's only been here for three weeks and i've already had to tell my partner his brother may need to move out at this rate yeah two hot takes fam what do i do oh my god i love that you're a two hot takes listener my heart goes out to you i'm actually so angry like i'm like shaking no i don't i i'm not shaking trembling with rage but my heart is like actually racing because i've thought about this a lot where for all the celebrities that have been child stars to the place they are right now and just celebrities in general like taylor swift and everything that she's been under all of the pressure like there's been so many things that she's had to go through and she always does like perseveres and i'm just so impressed with the way that she handles her life and communicates and stays positive because it can be easy for a human to crumble underneath all of that it's like for me when people hate her music that's so fine like i everyone's got their own taste yeah hate her music that's totally okay but like when people genuinely hate her i'm like how you clearly don't know anything about her if you hate her because she's just like so kind like yeah i mean at least from what she like shows us yeah i mean you're you're the ultimate swifty i'd say like i enjoy the music but i i definitely don't like her music don't know that much like there's certain things i've seen online lately that have like kind of upset me we've talked about it like oh i forgot where i'm like oh that's a little dicey you should probably address that but i do think like there's so much energy behind this where it's like this is not your home oh yeah this is aggressive stomping doors because you hear someone you don't like music grow the fuck up this is not your house your brother and his partner aka your future like in-law like are kind they're paying for your weed even it's just that's not an essential item it's it's like this it's ungrateful ungrateful entitled and rude extremely disrespectful yeah i he's deranged i know range you're getting kicked out of like two different places and that and in your like lowest moments you're gonna just go and make life even harder and basically you're gonna be like oh my god i'm gonna be like oh my god i'm gonna be like push these people out too like of your life from helping you like why are you making it so hard for people to help you it's not you don't literally it's not that common for people to help people no matter if they're family or not like in this way so the fact that you have people that are willing to do this and you're gonna just like shit all over something that makes them happy is so messed up like take taylor swift out of the equation right because like i whatever like some people insert anyone yeah insert anyone he knows how much you love this artist you have the vinyls you have the merch you have everything you love this artist and he goes above and beyond to incite like this hateful energy like the minute someone slammed a door in my house out the minute you throw your dinner away because you're so disgusted you can't be in the same room as the music ridiculous and then you throw your silverware in the sink that fork is gonna come flying at your ass at your ass and i hope it's shishka bobs you i hope it does just start booby tramp chopping the house i mean at this point like i'd say hey you know your behavior is really really unacceptable like we've gone above and beyond opening our doors making sure your needs are met we've put ourselves out there by giving you money paying for non-essentials like weed we really have gone above and beyond to make sure you are in a safe happy healthy home and you have recreational fun like we've gone above and beyond and you're not being at the bare minimum respectful yeah we're gonna give you three weeks to move out that's no i'd be like you're out now i'm not even kidding i know i don't know i don't care i don't think he has any money i don't care get the fuck out you have a serious attitude problem yeah and you need to fall on your ass and hard in order to adjust it because if you got kicked out twice before this and this is how you treat your gas or you're not your guests the the owners like you clearly need something big to happen in order for you to change that and something needs to give because this is so unacceptable so like yeah go and like figure it out on your own i know and that's the other side i mean i think like hey i hate this behavior notice like no he can go find a roommate he's working now nope like right now you're done why am i being the devil's advocate a little on this one i just think i just think that this like behavior is so you despicable it's like it's just like triggering um and and then add like taylor swift now it's personal so the people that hate taylor swift that are listening are like literally like crossing out my face on everything really no i mean everyone is entitled to like who they like like it i mean i don't love certain artists but like justin does and so i'll listen to them if they're in the car that's that's different though you're not gonna spit on him for it but i'm not disrespectful exactly he's disrespectful yeah top comment does say that he's living rent free and throwing a fit over your music the audacity this isn't about taylor swift it's about his respect for you in your own home for sure time for a serious talk about house rules or an exit plan exit plan being now all right our writer does respond thank you that's what i've been saying the level of disrespect is insane he's been my best friend for three years and now we all live together and my partner and i are helping him financially and he acts like this wait brother-in-law is best friend that's what oh they're all like i mean it was like they were all friends yeah so now i'm like okay maybe he's like really comfortable a little too comfortable okay maybe we can give him like one week notice i think two is no we can give him one week to get his shit together and if he doesn't like it then we can give him like two weeks to get his shit together if he does then he can stay for a little bit longer okay i think that's a fair compromise this other comment goes not the asshole i don't like taylor swift but if you are graciously giving me a place to stay when i'm on hard times your music choices would be my last thought yeah i'd be more concerned about what chores i could do to pay you back while i looked for a job yeah and to thank you on a daily basis what to do well he can shut the fuck up and contribute to the household or he can move out again i really can't stand taylor swift if someone was kind enough to offer me a home when i needed help i'd be so grateful being a jerk about what music you love is such a terrible thing to comment on you seem so kind and i'm sorry this is happening why why do people like can't stand her like i don't understand that we're gonna have to ask some people in the comments i just think like it's you see that like her art brings so many people happiness and connection like why does that make you angry i do not know but uh we do have an update this is like the one i don't want an update for i'm like move on i hate everyone just kidding hey two outtakes fam thank you so much for your input on my last post with the exception of a few people the comments were really affirming and helped me pull my head out of my ass man up and face the situation more directly i went ahead and deleted the post just in case as i caught a few people i know in real life peeping it my fault for putting everyone onto the pod we waited until he was in a good mood then my partner and i sat him down and laid out on the table we told him that his reactions to our music made us feel like we were walking on eggshells and being held hostage in our own home we told him we were starting to become resentful and considering drastic measures if things didn't change we made it clear that we were happy to help him to an extent and clarified the extent but only if he could remain respectful we clearly set the expectation that in our house our house we don't throw things slam things yuck anyone's yum or yell we made sure to address it delicately but firmly we asked if he'd felt respected in the house if there was anything deeper going on mentally he let us know about some personal things that he was struggling with and we worked together to make a game plan going forward so to those of you that pointed out it was likely a lot of change at once and there was probably a deeper mental health issue occurring thank you he recognized and acknowledged that his reactions were not the same as his own and he was not the only one who were inappropriate as well as unwarranted he apologized for his responses and disrespect thanked us for being willing to put so much effort into making him understand how his actions were affecting us and how mindful we've been about playing her music while admitting we've been objectively overly conscious he agreed that the frequency we were asking for wasn't unreasonable 45 minutes a week after a rough day over dinner without him talks in private conversations not including him during activities not including him like watching tiktoks on the couch as he walks by this is fucking crazy yeah you should be able to live in your house do you are you kidding no he can no there's no you don't need to make no he confirmed we weren't listening too loudly that he wasn't able to hear it in his room or upstairs at all he should stay there and that we should be able to sparingly listen to her music in common spaces as we allow him to do that as well we came to the conclusion together that his frustration has been building since his feed has been full of her stuff recently with the recent album that fact is likely due to his interactions with her hate videos is a discussion for another time hate videos who knows he's probably watching something and then getting even more of her content we collectively agreed that it's just better for him to keep his mouth shut going forward ultimately there's nothing we could say if we ever tried to make him like her and on the flip side there's nothing he can say he knows how we feel and there's no point in beating a dead horse so basically he's been overexposing himself it was good to hear him come to the conclusion this whole situation was 99 his own fault and tell us that we weren't doing anything wrong we told you that honestly neither of us were expecting the level of accountability he did take yeah all three of us got headphones we gave him a pair of earbuds about a week ago and we will continue using them in heavy rotation for longer listening sessions of music the others don't enjoy this is like way too many compromises for your house but maybe i'm just an asshole no i agree it's your house it's no op goes on to say i've agreed to teach him budgeting and basic finance management techniques to get him on his feet faster and planning to surprise him with a few vinyls of his own of his favorite artists our lease renews in april until then we'll be having bi-weekly sit-downs to go over concerns and we'll re-evaluate our living situation at least renewal if he's still here then if all goes well sooner if things don't improve the mood in our house is great now i thought there might be some tension after the discussion but it went over really well well as long as you're happy that's good there you go i don't think you should have to make compromises though but if you feel good about it if you feel happy then that's what's important yeah i mean i don't think you need to be this big of a person but if you're comfortable doing that to make peace in your home and like support your your friend your family then that's a sacrifice you're willing to make but i also think he was being extremely unreasonable and disrespectful and he can go in his room when there's music playing in the living room that he doesn't want to hear it is your house and you're paying for every single bill yeah i'm like a little i'm like blown away by like how much give there was but good for you you sound like a great person yeah i'm sure it's probably just like i mean if well one it's op's partner's brother and then on top of it op's best friend so i can see how like once you have that conversation and he's being so like understanding and now he's being like respectful and taking accountability that then like okay cool you but that then you kind of want to like the love that you have for this person comes out and you're like i'm willing to like i can see how that would happen even though it's like her home but but i'm i'm it sounds like good enough happy ending good enough moving along we love you thank you for listening thank you for being here teach me your patience because i i do not have this level of composure i don't anymore i used to i've been like really i've been like having thin patience lately super thin yeah how do you expand your patience and how do you expand your patience and how do you expand your patience is that like how do you get that back i don't know this is like the first time that i've been this like quick to get well i don't want to fly off the handle are you flying off the handle i don't even want to say that either because like i definitely have had like times where i get like really really like frustrated but like i feel it kind of like boils over yeah um and like lately it just feels like like i have like somebody like not let me in when i'm merging and i'm like - A little road rage, I had, did I tell you on my road rage the other day? No. I'll tell you about it after. These guys already heard about it. I don't flick them off though. Maybe that was on Patreon. I don't flick them off where they can see it. So I do hold back a little bit because I don't want actual road rage. Oh yeah. It's like more internally but I do, I flick them off under my car. I love my horn. I use my horn pretty often. No, I just like, I had one experience where like, I don't know, like somebody did something stupid and like, and they ended up honking at me and I was like, you were the one who did the stupid thing so I honked back. I just want to do this. And then she like, Honked at me again. And then she was like honking and like flicking me off and like just being like, like driving crazy and in that moment I was like, oh my God, it's not worth it to have road rage. Like it's not worth it to, I can feel it inside and I can scream in my car but like it's not worth it to like interact with this person. No, people literally get killed over road rage. Like people are so ill. People are ill. People are ill. This next motherfucker is definitely ill. Motherfucker. Ew. Okay, that was a little aggressive. I take it back. This episode is presented by State Farm. There's impressive, like instantly winning over your boyfriend's parents and then there's impressive, like being smart about saving money for your dream home or a sweet new ride. And a great way to do that is to bundle home and auto with the State Farm personal price plan. Bundling, just another way to save with the personal price plan. Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there. Prices are based on ratings plans that vary by state. Coverage options are selected by the customer. Availability, amount of discounts and savings and eligibility vary by state. This episode is brought to you by Chrysler. Life with kids is basically a never ending series of plot twists. One minute, everyone's buckled in. The next, someone's dropped a snack, lost a shoe or needs a bathroom break immediately. That's why the newly designed Chrysler Pacifica is built for real life. With thoughtful features like stow and go seating, hands free sliding doors, and passenger seating up to eight, it helps keep everything moving because family life isn't about the perfect moments. It's about making the most of any moment. Visit your local dealer or chrysler.com to learn more and schedule a test drive today. Chrysler is a registered trademark of SCA US LLC. Okay, next story is brought to you by Ollie Wellness. I hate feeling like an asshole in life. I like when I'm balanced in all aspects, but especially my vagina. It's where happy hoo-ha comes in. Ollie's vaginal probiotic that supports vagina health and pH balance. And this next story definitely needs something balanced out. I mean, I just warned you. I'm like, this is not okay. So let's get into this next story. So it's coming from AITAH, nine days old, titled Am I the Asshole? For asking my husband not to sneeze like that. My husband has always been a loud sneezer in the 17 years we've been married. Recently, he's begun screaming while he sneezes. When before he had been making a loud yell shout. I've brought it up casually that he's really loud when he sneezes. And is it really necessary? He says he can't help it. Last night, I was in bed with a headache. Right around the start of bedtime. He came in to use our bathroom and did one of his scream sneezes. I said, please don't sneeze like that. I have a bad headache. He didn't know about my headache. He became upset and said it's involuntary and he can't help it. He very sarcastically said, I'm sorry for sneezing. A few minutes later, he came to my bedside and asked me to open my hand. He put a folded up square of toilet paper in my hand and said, quote, I'll stop bothering you with my involuntary sneezing if you will stop voluntarily leaving period blood under the toilet seat. So will you go clean that up right now or should I do that for you? Whoa. I told him that I thought I had cleaned up after myself earlier. Earlier, I had asked him to bring me a new tub of Clorox wipes when I was on the road. I was on the toilet and I cleaned up with that. He then said, quote, I'm really offended because I apologized for my sneezing and you didn't even acknowledge it. He then took his pillows and blankets and slept in the extra bed. This morning, he said he was sorry for getting snippy last night. I haven't known what to say about it all yet. It's all so ridiculous. And I'm wondering if I'm out of line for thinking that screaming while sneezing is not necessary. He didn't used to do this. I'm not saying that he has to stop or control the actual sneezing part. You all are insane. Wait, is this a listener? No. Okay. No, this is coming from AITAH. Likely a random. Yeah. I don't know what's going on, but you know what? They are out of fucking whack. But what's funny is that these are like also very like innocent problems compared to other stuff that we discuss. Like, you know, it's their argument over. You go ahead. You go ahead. I'm pissed. You don't think these are innocent compared to some of the other stuff we talk about? I'm going to shut my mouth and not interrupt you. Morgan, we've had we've had like incest cheating stories. Okay. We have. Okay. Well, when you compare it to that. That's what I'm comparing it to. Well, you might be right there. I don't know what it is. I think this is a dude thing with age because my dad has become this person where he is like, and it's like it's you don't need to sneeze like that. I understand. But I actually would be really upset if my partner tried to police my sneeze. Like, how do you sneeze? I don't know. Do you scream? No. But like, I still think that I still think I would be very upset if my partner tried to police my sneeze. But at the same time, I don't know if I can judge that much because I will yell at Brian for his burping. Is that similar? That's yep. That's apples to apples. So he a different font. What he does, though, which grosses me out so much. Yeah, you're in it. I kind of feel bad for saying this like on here. But like he'll burp and then he like lets his whole like body like like growl with it. Like, oh, disgusting. And I'm like, stop doing that. And and he's like, it's just a burp. But I'm like, no, it's not. You're making yourself like act like you're about to throw up. Like, stop. So I'm so I'm like, I can also relate to her, too. I just I feel confused. I think there's a little bit of a breakdown in their communication, clearly. Oh, I mean, his response was was crazy. That's what's sending. Yeah. Can you imagine you accidentally so pissed like I the other morning, like I my my cramps were so bad. I couldn't find my heat pad. I was like on the brink of like, I kind of want to go to the hospital. Like my cramps were that bad. Couldn't find the heat pad. Listen's looking all over the house for 45 minutes. I fake cleaned and I hit it somewhere. Can't find it. The next morning I get up and I like ruined a pair of underwear while I was sleeping. Ruined them. Ruined them. And I take them off. I rinse them. And then I'm like getting into the shower. And before I can get in the shower, I'm like dropping globs of blood. You know, I don't really bad. I don't like glob talk. But like I wiped him up. I grabbed like our cleaning bleachy spray, whatever the hell it is. Wiped it up. But if Justin then would have came to me and been like, open your hand. Oh, yeah. I'm thinking it's a cute surprise. I'm thinking he got me a piece of chocolate to make me feel better. I don't know. And he goes, here's a piece of paper towel for you to go wipe up your period blood. You nasty woman. Like, I'm just like, that's like how it feels. Yeah, no, I'd be furious. And so it's like, hey, I have a headache. I just kindly asked you to not sneeze like that and scream. Why are you screaming? You didn't always scream. Yeah, I think the fact that he didn't always do that, like do it like that. That would send me. That would send me over the ledge. So I'm like, OK, all you had to do is be like, hey, super sorry, hon. Super sorry. Will you rest up? And if you see a little period blood around the rim, you ignore it. Just like you do the explosive diarrhea spots. You ignore it. I knew. I knew that was coming. Sometimes you have to ignore it. Yeah. I have the grossest story, but I'm not going to out this older family member. So I'm not going to go there. But it was pretty nasty. And guess what I did? I ignored that bathroom. And guess who cleaned it the next day? Justin, because he loves me. Wow. Yeah. Wow. That's love. That is love. Love is ignoring the nasty parts. I'm like, is the older family member me? - No, did you pee on my ass? floor no yeah no um i like that you i don't know if you're keeping this in here but me and morgan were talking about how i now say ruin and so i thought that was funny how you're like ruin ruin i um i have a guest coming up who's also from the midwest and i'm gonna compile a list of words that we say wrong and i'm gonna hand them the list and see how they say yes i love that so if you guys have any words that you want me to make them say please drop them in the comments maybe i'll like pin something i know i said hammock weird the other day i don't know what got into me i don't say hammock usually i don't think at least i don't know i did realize i say toyota wrong oh yeah i saw that comment can't win them all okay wait i think i say hammock yeah i think i do say hammock do i say hammock too i don't know oh god but hey i think these people can figure it out i think they need to communicate i think there's a way to get back on track get balanced again because this just like is not gonna work long term like you guys have been together 17 years and maybe this is one of those things because they've been together 17 years they're like what do we have to fight about oh i guess sneezing yeah that's period blood but hey after after 17 years if your sneeze changes i'm gonna be a little sussed out i'll be a little pissed i like how you try to fight me on the fact that this one is like one of the worst stories we've come across and i'm like no remember what we've read not the worst but like it just like some of the innocuous ones just have irk you because it's more like me and yeah i get that that's how that's how i've felt about one of the stories it's like it's so random but like i'm like it did something to me i don't know why it peaked a core but hey just like our relationships sometimes vaginas can get thrown off balance too ollie gets that whether it's happy hoo-ha that empowers you to take charge of your vaginal health or period hero for pms support i period heroed it up the other day that like those so good for my cramps great timing great timing to have an ollie event to go to it was magical but you can find ollie supplements at retailers nationwide or at ollie.com code tht30 for 30 off these statements have not been evaluated by the food and drug administration this product is not intended to diagnose treat cure or prevent any disease wow it's pretty good thanks ollie for sponsoring that story and we're on to the next one oh i didn't even read the comments um top comment my husband used to do the same thing and i told him great so why isn't it involuntary in public he's a loud sneezer in public but no yell i would have killed him had we gotten to a scream stage after that he stopped not saying it would work for you and not saying it was an easy conversation either but it's been a lot of years now i love the way that you're reading her i like feel like i can hear this person actually talking i try i try uh someone else goes this has been my experience to the letter my partner sneezing so loud at home it would hurt my ears yet we stayed with his family for a week and he did quiet sneezes to not make noise in their house i clocked it immediately because he spent years claiming that he cannot sneeze quietly i pointed out he was doing normal sneezes and he had always denied being able to he now sneezes normally i'm still baffled why he was always doing normal sneezes screaming his sneezes previously you know what it is can you do what can you just like can you do a scream sneeze fake one i just like i need to like um i need to hear it so my dad sneezes really loud so let me try to channel that i'm nervous like i'm locked in i'm listening uh don't want to be friends anymore that was not it though because my dad was way deeper i was really trying to channel his sneezes but the thing is is that like if you have kids around i will say that me and my brother would laugh so hard when my dad would sneeze that's cute so i think that's also why this doesn't trigger me is because i have a good memory associated with loud sneezing that's cute yeah i do not i have been woken up so many times by my dad's loud sneezing if you have a loud sneeze screamer can you please record them and then tag me in it on instagram i would like i just want to see for research like what are you dealing with but okay we're moving on to this next one okay if you are grossed out by poop please skip to the next story okay so this one is coming from r slash am i overreacting it's titled am i overreacting she's shit with me in the shower yes this is bringing back to our first episode throwback baby this is the one that the episode that i would talk about to refer people yeah that i would tell everyone what the podcast is about hello long time lurker first time poster throw away because i don't want this affiliated with my main i female 22 have been dating this girl female 21 for about three months and it's been great the only red flag i've seen before this was that she was a bit messy leaving things without putting them away including trash anyways yesterday we went to a karaoke club got super wasted and she spilled her drink all over us no big deal we went to my apartment after we were in the shower nothing sexy or anything we were too drunk for that but i remember looking down and there was a streak on the bottom of the shower and i asked her what it was i shit you not she said quote oopsie i did a poopsie ha ha ha keep her and pushed the ball of shit into the drain with her toe oh my god i didn't know what to say i just kind of stood there this chick really just pooped i told myself that she was drunk and we could talk about it tomorrow today fast forward to this morning we woke up and i could not get what i saw out of my head and so i tried to keep it light and laugh about pooping maybe try to get it into the toilet in the future and she goes on to explain that she just feels comfortable with me and doesn't want to hide who she is anymore whoa i asked if she poops in the shower all the time yeah she does i asked if she could refrain from doing so in my shower and she agreed dot dot dot dot dot i just feel like i can't move past this and look at her the same and kind of want to break up with her am i overreacting i need you to know how much more disturbing this image is for me after yesterday unclogging our bathroom bathtub and i don't know how much more disturbing this image is for me after yesterday unclogging our bathroom what what was in your there was not poop but like but my point is is that like my so my hair is long right and even though i try to like i it gets in my yeah hands and i'll put it on the side of the shower and then i clean up and throw it wipe it away i clock you yeah put it in but still some hair falls into the drain right it happens so it started filling up and so i like got a snake and pulled it out and i was like oh my god i'm gonna puke i'm gonna puke i'm gonna puke i'm gonna puke and it was like an actual snake in there and like my hair was tangled up with just like like gunk just like it was like yes like white gunk and like i don't i don't know what it all was but i was like pulling and pulling and it was like really gross and i just can't imagine if my partner was pooping in there and i'm using my hands to like rope this stuff out with their poop in my oh yeah no sorry that is a safety hazard we can have nope we can't have any of that did i do you remember what happened at the condo when i lived with my dad no our pipes in the building the building was old the pipes got insanely clogged apparently the upstairs neighbor was flushing wipes there were rumors he was also putting diapers down the toilet like it was it was really bad so our our pipes for the whole rumor like clogged well because this guy who came said he found diapers and wipes oh my god yeah i i like i have a hard time believing someone would be dumb enough to flush diapers but there's a towel in there if there was someone dumb enough it would be him full on christmas tree and so because everything clogged all of a sudden because it went from the third floor to the second floor to the first floor out to the sewer yep so my toilet started overflowing with stuff that wasn't mine yeah the pipes were so backed up my bathtub started filling with the building's shit oh my god the night before i was supposed to record like my first episode with a big guest it was horrible horrible they had to come over to that they're like smells good no i I paid for an emergency plumber. It was the most insane thing. They came and, like, jetted the pipes with a huge water jet. Oh, my God. But, like, you're not—that stuff's not supposed to be in there. No. Like, I wouldn't—I don't blame you. I don't think you're overreacting. I think you—I think you would have to break up. I'm—you can pee in the shower all you want. Yeah. Pee away. But when you start pooping in that shower— That's where I draw the line. We're done. We got to have some type of boundaries here. I mean, if you accidentally shit yourself and you need to rinse off, different story. But if you're doing it continuously, there's toilets, girl. There's toilets for a reason. No, I completely agree. The fact that OP's partner said that it's a constant thing, that would be very, very concerning. Yeah, I mean, she said she just feels comfortable with me and doesn't want to hide who she is anymore. Who she is. Is shitting in the shower. I also just think it's so—it's so weird. Like, I don't care how comfortable I am with anyone. Like, why would you want to expose them to that smell? What if you had a taco the day before and there was a corn kernel in there? That's kind of a moot point, but— I just don't know why. Like, I think I had a story with Mikayla this past— This past week, too, and there was, like, a poop story. Because they—I don't know what. Reddit goes through phases, and poop is on the Reddit brain right now. I remember when people thought you had, like, a fetish. I know. I was talking to someone the other day, and they were, like, describing their podcast, and they were like, yeah, it's a comedy podcast, and we talk about diarrhea a lot. And I go, whoa. Whoa. You gotta be careful with that. People will accuse you of having a poop fetish. I don't know why. That's, like, probably one of the funniest, like, negative things anyone's ever said about the podcast. It's just so crazy. Because I really, like, it actually freaks me out. Like, if you knew me, like, I just find it hilarious. Well, that's why it's so funny. It's hilarious. Oh, my God. But, yeah. Top comment. You cannot spend your life with somebody that shits on the floor and mashes it down the drain with their foot. I feel like this isn't a thing that even needs to be verbalized. But it's how we started the podcast. It's how we started the podcast. OP responds, She just said it with such calm. I wanted to be sure. Yeah. And now I feel so valid. I'm definitely breaking up with her. Wait, do they live together? No. Okay. Only dating for three months. Oh, okay. Oh, wow. Only three months. Run. Run. OP has since deleted their account. That's all she wrote. She's like, oh, my God. She's like, I don't want to be associated with that anymore. Well, that's just, like, nostalgic for me. I know that sounds crazy. But, like, truly, that I think it was either the first or the second episode that we recorded was a story where. Waffle stomping. Yeah, where this girl, I think, was like, I don't know what to do. I just found out that my boyfriend always poops in the shower, which is why after the gym he always forces me to shower first. And one day I finally was like, no, you shower first. Like, why do you, why do you always do this? And he was like, it's because I don't want you to go into the shower right after I pooped in it. And she was like, what? And I think they'd been together for, like, years. Like, they were living together. They were living together. Yeah, in that one. This one dodged a bullet. Yeah. But that's just, like, for so long when I would tell people, like, they're like, oh, what's the podcast about? I'd be like, well, it's, like, Reddit stories. And they're like, what kind? Like, finance? And I'd be like, no, like, this girl had a boyfriend who poops in the shower. So she's like, what do I do? And we're like, I'll break up. It's so vintage. I spoke on a panel last year, and it came up on the panel of, like, why do you have a video podcast? And I'm like, well, like, I'll give you guys an example. Does anyone in the room know what waffle stomping is? And, like, you saw, like, a couple people, like, slowly raise their hands. They're like, do I want to admit this? Literally. And I go, for those of you that don't know, waffle stomping is when you take a shit in the shower. And stomp it down with your foot. And the room gasped. Like, jaws were dropped. And I go, that's why you have video. It was just, like, this, like, it was so powerful. It was powerful. But I think these next couple stories are going to be pretty powerful as well. Powerfully ill. Sick. This episode is brought to you by Revolve. If you're looking at your closet right now thinking, no, none of this is working, just go. I love that they have the brands I actually want. There's always something new, and I can order a few options because the shipping is fast, and the returns are easy. Go to revolve.com slash THT to shop my faves and use code THT for 15% off your first order. Offer available for a limited time, so don't miss out. This episode is brought to you by Cash App. I myself have fallen for a scam. Thought I was getting a really good deal on tickets, and bam, I sent the money, and I didn't get my ticket. There's so many common scams these days, and finding all the red flags can be hard. That is where Cash App comes in. Keeping your money safe from fraud deserves to be a priority, and Cash App treats it that way. With Security Lock, Cash App requires a successful face ID or biometric authentication to access your account. It's like your money is protected by your own personal bodyguard, even if your phone is lost or stolen. Plus, if you're about to send money to someone new, and Cash App notices something looks a bit off, or that you may have a problem with your phone, or that you might be falling for a scam, it will send you a warning before the money is sent to confirm that everything looks right. Download Cash App and spend with peace of mind today. Download Cash App today and make your money work for you. Cash App is a financial services platform, not a bank. Banking services provided by Cash App's bank partners. Visit CashApp.com slash legal slash podcast for full disclosures. This next one, which, I'm going to be honest, okay, you guys, there is going to be the people are ill theme. Over on Patreon with Lauren, we just read a story that it's a Patreon story. Yeah. It just does not fit on this side of things. Yeah. It's a heavy conversation, and we just feel that it's better to have in a space where it's a little more communicative and people can really, like, we can intimately have a conversation, which is what we do on Patreon with a lot of the stories that we feel are too big or too heavy for the main channel. So that is. It is a story about a mom who's asking, am I the asshole for, like, still visiting my son in prison? And it's a really complex story, and we definitely want moms to chime in and just, like, have a conversation with us, but it's going to be over on Patreon. So instead, our last story before a palate cleanser is going to be this one. Okay. Trigger warning, though, you guys, this story does contain talks of a very traumatic birth. So if you cannot handle that today. Please go to the palate cleanser. So it is titled, Am I the Asshole If I Told My Husband I Wanted a Divorce After He Made Fun of How Many Pants I Tried On? I, 30 female, had a baby eight weeks ago via a traumatic birth. Ten hours of active labor, super high fever, emergency C-section, and my son didn't breathe for eight minutes after coming out. Oh, my God. I told my husband, 37 male, that I had no problem. I had no birth plan, and I just wanted us to all get out of the hospital alive and healthy. However, I did have a very specific plan for the first 40 days postpartum that involved eating specific Chinese foods, limiting outings, and not being cold or in the wind. I told him it was very important to me culturally and for my healing. While I was pregnant, which also had its complications, I meal prepped and froze a lot of food that I just asked him to heat up and add vegetables and make rice, and I wrote down recipes for him. He said, I got you, baby. He, in fact, did not have me. I spent the first two weeks postpartum sleeping on the couch because I couldn't get in and out of bed after my surgery, doing the whole night shift by myself every night, and not eating anything besides the fast food he would bring home, or I would end up cooking for us. Oh, my God. He told me that staying inside for 40 days was stupid, so by day 10, we were going out. I know that I should have said no, but I was too tired to argue. We had gone to the beach day 14, and when we got there, there were 35 mile-per-hour winds, and my husband said, quote, let me just fish for a little, and then we can go. But he disappeared down the beach with the car keys for three hours. Oh, hell no. While the baby and I sat in the wind. On day 16, he invited his sister to stay with us for a week, so I had to vacate the couch and climb in and out of our bed, still taking the whole night shift. His sister had a very similar surgery, hysterectomy, earlier this year, and was telling my husband and I about the risk of hernias after surgery like ours. This was after both of them sat on the couch for a week. on the couch and watched me haul laundry to and from the garage while they watched TV. Wow. She also demanded that we eat certain foods while she was here, that she can't get back home. And my husband door-dashed whatever she wanted to the house and or drove us all to go get food that she wanted. Meanwhile, I couldn't get him to heat up frozen food for me. Wow. She also told us about the importance of scar care after the surgery and suggested that I get a C-section massage. Any place I found were over $200. And I texted my husband that I felt guilty spending that much money on something so selfish. He changed the subject and didn't address my text at all. I hate him so much. I felt so incredibly hurt by this. I don't know if it was hormonal or what. No, he's a horrible person. But him not saying anything to me, feeling guilty for wanting to do something nice, for myself, made me feel so unloved and insignificant. Especially because after his sister had her surgery, he talked to me about wanting to send her $10,000 of our savings to help her out with medical bills. And he didn't even acknowledge, let alone offer to pay for a $200 massage for me. Wow. After I was cleared for regular physical activity at six weeks, I asked him if it would be okay if I spent 30 minutes a day in our garage working out. He agreed and said he would watch the baby for me. The next day, when I asked him to hold the baby for me while I worked out, and he took my son, he put him down into the baby Bjorn. The baby started crying halfway through, and I had to finish my workout while wearing the baby. He told me while I was pregnant that it was a non-negotiable for him that he continued going to the gym three times a week, and started going back week four from 2 p.m. to 6 p.m., leaving me with the baby and having to figure out dinner. Two to six? Is there a typo in that? Holy, oh my, oh, what is wrong with this guy? The last straw for me was yesterday. The last straw for me was right when you started. Right when you started talking, Morgan, I was done. I had been with the baby all night, and all morning, and he wanted to go and get lunch. So I asked him to watch the baby so I could get dressed, and I was taking longer than usual to get ready. He snarkily said to the baby, quote, Mom's got to try on six more pairs of pants before we can leave. And I lost it on him. I screamed, Nothing fits me because I just had a fucking baby, and I don't get to work out at all. I told him I fucking hate him, and that I should, go to his parents' house, or sleep on the couch, or whatever, just leave me alone. He shook his head at me like I was being irrational, and I felt such rage inside of me. How could he not see that I was dying? I spent the night Googling divorce lawyers, and I feel like I'm overreacting. Nope. Not at all. Do we have an update? I'm like, let's cut to the chase where you guys do get divorced. Come on. Come on. Fast forward to the ending. Also, like, try not to say it, try not to say it, try not to say it. Is he in love with his sister? There's definitely some interesting family dynamics. I don't understand this. Like, I would help my siblings if they needed it, but I wouldn't help my siblings over caring for Justin. That's, see, that's why I'm like, it's, it wouldn't be odd to me, if that's the person that he is. But the fact that he puts his sister on a pedestal, and his wife who carried his baby, like, gave birth to his baby, and he's going to treat her like crap, like, that's, that is so weird to me. I'm just disgusted by him. I'm absolutely disgusted by him. And there is an edit. So, looking at the actual post on Reddit, the post has been removed by OP. They, ended up deleting their account. So, I don't know if that's because of the comments and what they got and just, like, didn't want to hear it or it reconfirmed what they were feeling and then just, like, I'm good. I'm going to delete this before it goes crazier. I do have screenshots of an edit, but would you like to get into the top comments and then talk about the edit and then really go off on this person? Or do you want to go off, edit, top comments? Or go off, top comments, edit? I think, just start reading wherever you first see a word. I see many words. Just pick one and go. You're stressing me out. I'm really indecisive lately. I have decision paralysis. It is bad. So, the top comment, because I do think this came before the edit. Not the asshole. My ex once went hiking with a friend and left me alone with a four-month-old. I don't know why. I don't know why. I don't know why. While I had a pretty serious case of the flu. That was only the beginning. Notice I said, ex, these guys just don't get it. Don't want to get it and should never marry in the first place. You are not overreacting. You aren't dragging it out for 20 years like I did. That's the type of wisdom I did not have. Next comment. My now ex wanted to go on a Father's Day hike. Ten days after our baby, he was born. Vaginal, not C-section. A hard-rated hike. Five to eight-mile loop around a waterfall. You start at the top, so the second half is back up. We got into a massive fight because he would not slow the fuck down while I was carrying our baby upward hike of slippery rocks and waterfalls. He put on the baby carrier and just sped off without me. Wow. He still does not think he was wrong. Our kid is a, a teenager. Some dudes just don't get it. Wow. At least both of those have my now ex. And someone does quote them and goes, at least some kind of happy ending. So one of the other top comments is a hyperlink and it says, he gets it, he just doesn't care. And when you click the link, it goes to another post. It's from the 2X chromosome subreddit. Titled, he knows he doesn't care. My husband says he doesn't see the mess he leaves on the floor. I always end up having to pick it up. My fiance keeps grabbing my boobs randomly, even though I asked him to stop. My boyfriend yells at me and slams doors whenever we argue. He understands, he knows he doesn't care. He can hear you. He has a job. He attended school. When he gets pulled over by a cop, he gets his license out. He can read, he can follow directions, listen, understand consequences, and act to avoid them. He simply does not care about you. He is quite comfortable with you being unhappy, uncomfortable, burnt out, traumatized, as long as it means he gets what he wants and can keep the status quo. There isn't a special way to rephrase your feelings that will get through to him finally, or a special tactic you can use to get him to respect you. I honestly feel most women just don't understand how much disdain someone, some men have for us, on average. As painful as it is, we absolutely must come to terms with the fact that most, yes, I said most, men do not see or respect women as real people just like them, equal in value and humanity to themselves and their male buddies. Most. Meaning, it's statistically more likely the guy you're dating views you as a continuum from benevolent sexism to mild dehumanization to callous indifference to veiled contempt to outright hatred. Saying, I care about you, I love you, I'm trying, I'm sorry, does not mean those things are true. Actions make those words true. A man who cares, loves, tries, and is sorry doesn't make you rack your brain trying to find novel ways to communicate to him. He knows he simply doesn't care. Yup. Wow, that's such a powerful comment. Woo! And, yeah, just wow. It really is, like, I was talking to my friend about this who had gotten out of a relationship and she was saying how she saw herself so mean to her partner towards the end in a way that she's never seen herself. And I was like, well, he did a lot of crazy, awful things to you. He betrayed you a ton and you continued to forgive him and you kept trying to teach him how to love you correctly. And the thing that's so difficult is that, like, as humans, it's like when we first start dating people, we're not showing them all our bad right away, right? So we get attached to each other early on. And then when the bad starts coming out, we're already attached to each other. So it can be really hard for us to, like, pull away. And so when these other sides come out, instead of just being like, I gotta leave, we think we gotta teach them how to love me correctly. And sometimes, sometimes that can work. But most of the time, it's this never-ending game of making yourself crazy, of just, like, trying to figure out what way, you can communicate with them, is it softly? is it in the morning is it aggressively is it nicely what's what is it gonna be that they'll finally start like getting it and respecting me and like like showing me with actions and the answer is it won't you'll just end up being the worst version of yourself and screaming towards the end of the relationship until you finally are done but sorry no I think that was really good I'm just I'm sitting here like I'm soaking it all in and I'm like I'm just I'm thinking because yeah I think like if there's small issues early on yeah you can fix a lot of those you can learn how to communicate you can learn what each other needs from the relationship but if you get down the road to a point especially once a baby's involved and they're still not getting it you are expressing your feelings and they're still not hearing you or they just don't care they don't care then I do think it's a disconnect because you're not getting it you're not getting it you're not getting it you're not getting it love like love is work and like yeah you can choose to like put effort in and like work on your relationship each and every day I know there's a lot of relationship experts out there that like love isn't easy but for me love has not been this hard yeah like love has been very like honestly it has been kind of easy like have we had difficult moments early on yeah we're blending two families we're learning out how to navigate the holidays we're learning this and that about each other but like which should happen by the way that should happen that's growing if you're not growing in a relationship like that's not realistic either like or you're just gonna have a time if you're not gonna have any fight like there's there's somebody is like keeping to themselves yeah it's two humans very complex yeah you're joining lives to fight like Justin has always said because I got nervous about like some big fights early on and he was like no like fighting's not bad like you do need fights to grow like they can be constructive and help but like again like you shouldn't feel like a broken record you shouldn't feel like you're sacrificing your needs being met and you just feeling terrible because your partner really doesn't care about you yeah even after a baby even after you sacrifice so let's get really into this so what OP was talking about at the beginning of this whole post was called sitting the month so this is a Chinese tradition after childbirth it's usually about 30 days it can be longer and it's a confinement period there's a beautiful Chinese way to say it I don't even want to butcher it Zhao Yu Zi I'm not sure but it's essentially sitting the month it emphasizes rest and recovery for the mother the mom is like supposed to have so much help the mom actually gets like massages every day to like compress the womb and it's just this beautiful thing they eat certain foods they get pampered you're not supposed to go outside you're supposed to sit in your pajamas you're supposed to be zen this is like what I expect like absolutely this is what I want yeah this is what I need I think every woman needs this yeah deserves this shouldn't settle for less the fact that he dragged her to the beach how many days after a traumatic birth and c-section no it's so bad I was on a honestly thinking that 14 fucking days yeah and I was thinking two weeks I was thinking that it he was gonna spin it as like this is for so that you can get sunlight it'll be healing 35 mile per hour wind with a newborn baby three hours disappeared with car keys in the pocket oh my god I'm hitchhiking home I'm leaving this fucking woman went through hell three hours three do you understand how long it is to sit at a beach for three hours a harry potter movie in a healthy world without a newborn I don't even like being at the beach that long okay well that's where we differ but I do I do feel your newborn didn't breathe for eight minutes after being born no it's insanity c-section cut open sleeping on the couch sleeping on the couch and doing all the night feedings without any help this motherfucker's laying in bed getting ate piece of shit I'm not hours. Unreal. I like if you break apart every single piece of the story, working out, working out from 2 p.m. to 6 p.m. Unreal. Four hours. And she can't even get 30 minutes without the baby crying halfway through. And then she's got to wear the baby in a fucking baby carrier, a little baby Bjorn, because he can't be bothered. You know, like situations like this make me sad that she can't just like disappear with the baby legally. Like the fact that you have to still like interact with this piece of poo sucks. This is the poo that should get pushed down the drain with the toe. Toe the fuck out of this lawn. Get it out of here. That was quick. I like that. Okay. I'm clearly very unhappy with this one. This man is ill. This man. Oh, this man. What does he deserve? To date poo girl. He deserves to. Poo girl doesn't deserve that either. No, no, no, no. God, poo girl's gross, but not this bad. He deserves to be put in a big bathtub with a thousand leeches. Wow. Yeah, that's yeah, that's dark. That's not that dark. Thank you. Could have been way darker. If Michaela was here, she would have came up with something really dark. Michaela would have killed him. In detail. So we have an edit. Edit for clarification. That's what it says. We talked about every incident and he genuinely feels bad about how he behaved and has been spending more time with the baby with every talk. I fully know that I'm a doormat and have been working on it with my therapist and it was really hard for me to even express my postpartum needs with him. He does financially support us and has spent a ton of money on baby gear and gadgets that helped make nights and feeding easier for me. Bottle washer, nicer pump bottles, etc. Easier for you. Yeah, there it is. Why is he not fucking helping? He's a dad. Yeah, he's a dad. That's made it easy. That's made it easier for all of us is what it should be because he should be doing that. So he wants to support the family financially, but not emotionally, not physically. He wants to have a puppy. He wants the cute little puppy baby. Like, God. And since the beach day, he's greatly decreased our outings with the baby. He has also been holding the baby at night for a couple of hours from 9 p.m. to whenever he goes to bed so I can sleep. I don't forgive him. He's also been on paternity leave this whole time. Wow. Just throw your computer into the wall. Burn the Christmas trees down. Sorry, guys. Light this place on fire. I read that right. I read. Yeah. So he's not working. Justin, come here. And he's getting eight hours of sleep. And he's not feeding the baby. He can't. He can't even hold the baby for 30 minutes while you work out. Meanwhile, he's on paternity leave. leave and gets four hours to work out. Oh, well, he's decreased the outings. You and your fucking baby shouldn't be going anywhere. You're supposed to be sitting the month. Sit the month. He can't even heat up a microwavable meal that she already meal prepped and froze. Someone give this man of a sect to me so he can't do this again or to anyone else. I like the fire in you. Yes, I'm going to fucking get myself canceled. I want to. That's so bad. That's so bad. Can you help? I just I don't know what to do. I feel like I've lost you. Like you're in a different you've you've gone somewhere. I'm in the inside. Yeah. Inside out movie. Yeah. I'm the little red man. Oh my God. The red man. She's actually I think anger. I think little red little red guy. The little. OK. That's who I am. Yeah. I am him. He is me. Wow. Anger. She's not done. Oh. After the whole he's been on paternity leave this whole time. Also, I don't have any family I can stay with right now. And my friends have all recently moved out of state. So tough. Isolation. Oh, my God. What? There's another update. That was the edit. We have an actual update. I don't know if mentally I can handle it. Update. We talked this morning and he said that I'm punishing him for things that happened months ago and that it's unfair that I won't forgive him or see his support in other ways. He said that I'm the problem and that I always need someone to be angry with. I brought up his sister and he dismissed it as me needing to compare my life with other people. I told him I feel like I ask for so little and that he's not listening to me. And he said I just fixate on everything he doesn't do. Yeah, because he doesn't do shit. So classic. I just feel so unseen. He said he would love to give me time to go do things I want to do. Quote, accept. you don't have any hobbies he said if i gave you two hours right now what would you go do and i said i have to clean the bathroom and do laundry he said i'm allowed to treat him like shit when i'm hungry and sleepy and he always forgives me i do get very standoffish and short when i'm both hungry and sleepy but i can't forgive him for something he did so long ago we're speaking a little in riddles towards the end here what did he do so long ago did he cheat is he at the gym four hours every day or is he with a girlfriend i feel like she's trying to say so long ago as in the two because he started off saying that like she can't let it go from how he acted right after the birth i don't know a little bit a little bit of a riddle here at the end but um i mean the comments just go crazy like it's again and again just like just please be done like please be done like this you're already a single mom like oh he says if i gave you two hours what would you do and it's like i'd clean the bathroom that's like so messed up that he said that too like you don't have any hobbies so you don't deserve time yeah literally it's like none of your business bitch i'll sit in a corner and stare at a wall rather than be next to you for two hours you asshole i would take a nap and that is perfectly acceptable yeah consider i'm doing everything else i maybe i would have some hobbies if you weren't such an incompetent piece of shit yeah maybe then i'd have some hobbies i love that maybe i would have the peace of mind being able to leave our child with you yeah knowing that you weren't going to pop it in a baby bjorn and then not be able to handle them when they're crying yeah can't even work out for 30 minutes because you're so incompetent i wish you could say this to him how can we somehow get this message delivered to his face i don't know and i don't think we're gonna get any updates past this i mean op deleted their whole account like i just hope that like if anyone out there hears this like this isn't okay someone can provide for you financially but they should still be expected to be a parent 100 like you both committed to having children like you both signed up for that yeah i actually just saw someone post recently about when you are talking about kids with somebody that you're dating to really dive in and ask all of these detailed questions like how do we divide up responsibilities like what do you think for punishment if like a child's doing something that's not appropriate like like actually asking all these questions beforehand will give you so many answers it's important and i just think i've never even considered that like i like when i was dating didn't even consider really like asking people if they wanted kids like unless they said i don't want kids then i just was like oh i just assumed like i don't i don't know i didn't i just didn't really ask those type of questions and i just think it's like such a good idea to do so because i mean obviously op like you you know you got your baby like out of this marriage and so that's wonderful but like i don't know i don't know i don't know i don't know i don't know this guy is probably not your guy long term and the fact that he only temporarily started acting better and then went right back to being like you don't notice any of my good things you're just calling out my bad things like star votes he's deflecting and yep putting it back on you exactly i also am getting now like kind of hearing more too like i'm getting some financial abuse like you should have been able to just go and buy that 200 massage yeah you just had a baby it's like the least that you deserve oh so like you shouldn't have to ask to go spend 200 on yourself after having a baby yeah for both of you so i'm getting a lot of red flags so if this is any alarm bells for you guys like please know you deserve better this is not not it i don't think i've been this distraught from a story in quite some time no i like literally like i said i lost you for a minute i don't know if you even knew i was here to be honest justin's like sitting over there like i don't know what he's doing i didn't read this fully video game or something i didn't read it fully like again like i'll read some of the titles and then get to a certain point and i'm like yeah it's good enough okay this is really this is juicy i didn't read i sure as shit didn't read the update like yeah justin i know justin popped in for this like last little bit he's like not reacting at all to anything and like his he doesn't have earplugs do you want come in come here come here it's not too late come here come give your celeb take please be the male voice of reason i was just making jokes i don't want morgan to punch you oh yeah i'm definitely not coming over did you hear did you hear me say that he's so happy playing i said justin come here we need a face to punch no one's gonna punch you it's just a joke okay he's gonna come in for a celebrity take i'm gonna move and then we will have the palette cleanser i've never been this like razzled before razzle dazzle i mean am i the palette cleanser yeah is that why i'm here i don't know why i'm here because the people like seeing you you're a friendly face i'm here hi it's like i don't know why they they're gonna have to go a whole week maybe even two weeks without seeing you but now they get to see you because you jumped in you know i i had part in the trees so yeah doing great i have like stage fright i have anxiety right now i feel i'm prepared morgan's face is behind the camera is great too this is going off the rails guys it's great it's a g episode we've been off the rails two hot rails i offered i offered prior to this story to sit right there with a mic in my hand and no one seemed excited about that so i didn't know that feels like i'm being thrown in at the end like here you go you said you said it too quietly we didn't hear you no it was it was heard and acknowledged do you have any christmas turning red yet any christmas plans seeing family friends this is going downhill quick okay i don't know the story okay okay adios this episode is brought to you by trivia a not so hot take sweeteners that taste great make life easier like trivia allulose plus stevia sweetener and monk fruit sweetener it tastes like sugar with zero calories per serving and no aftertaste it's perfect for beverages baking and cooking if you're looking for a better way to enjoy sweetness with zero calories per serving you really need to try trivia allulose plus stevia sweetener and monk fruit sweetener available online and nationwide at kroger albertson's safeway your favorite local grocery retailer but here here but okay here we go here here four score 20 years ago here we go with the palate cleanser my friends because we are certainly not going to end on that note so this is titled my dentist asked me out not sure what to do it's not in my spreadsheets it sounds familiar but it's not there so here we go i went to a grocery store over the weekend and saw my dentist and i was like oh my god i'm gonna go to the grocery store my dentist which was a little weird but she recognized me and came up and said hi we had a little chat and it was nice because human contact is so non-existent nowadays then she said she had to go and asked for my number i figured she needed it for dentistry reasons if i'm being honest but i probably should have figured out it wasn't for that anyways after i got home she started texting me with casual stuff eventually we talked about how i'd never read harry potter or seen the movies and she said did you pick this one for me specifically yeah a lot of them i picked just for you today um and she said quote we could grab some food and i'll watch them with you followed by if you want about five minutes later i haven't responded and it's been 30 minutes if she wasn't my dentist it would be an absolute yes she's hot and she's fun to talk to and i'm like i'm gonna go to the grocery store and i'm gonna go to the i know we share a couple of hobbies too which is always nice on the other hand i'm 90 sure they aren't supposed to ask their patients out i always thought she was being a little flirty sometimes but like i said i don't think they're supposed to do that so i never took it as flirting so i guess what i'm asking here is what the hell do i do i don't want to cause problems with her career but i also would really like to date her a lot find a new dentist idiot boy brain versus girl brain come on love of your life oh my god over finding a new dentist over a once a year that you probably go in every other year let's be honest i'm sorry what i'm talking to the guy how often do you go to the dentist i don't know like twice a year okay yeah you're good i'm like lauren you're supposed to be going every six months girl i know i actually should be going every quarter because i have gum issues honestly i don't have dental insurance and going every six months is cheaper than spreading out longer because then you get a cavity and cavities cost way more to fix makes sense if anyone needs a good dentist around the la area dr bradley matthew don't don't overbook him because i still need to go there i know i was gonna say that's risky he's just such a good dentist like such a good dentist he's incredible i like went somewhere here when i first like needed a dentist out here because mine in minnesota retired this dentist told me i need like four crowns i had seven cavities i went to him and he's like you're fine you need one crown that's it i'm like con artist savior like he's so good so i get in that breath i'm like okay i get finding a good dentist and not wanting to lose them but uh but uh harry potter and love of life and hot and similar hobbies it's a no-brainer it's a no-brainer so top comment it's easy to find another dentist but it's hard to find a good wife also it's not worthy to mention how up close she has been with him she already has an intimate relationship with his mouth and still had the balls to ask him out at the supermarket bravo madam yeah someone goes you fucking go out with her and eventually become her trophy husband what the fuck is wrong with you say yes uh someone does decide to quote the ethics code from the american dental association 2.g personal relationships with patients dentists should avoid intrapersonal relationships that could impair their professional judgment or risk the possibility of exploiting the confidence placed in them by a patient she could lose her license for becoming sexually involved with an active patient yeah i know they just they need to not be i mean as long as she's not a bad dentist it's not like just because she's sleeping with him i feel like that would incentivize her more to do good dentistry work it's not doesn't work that way okay no i'm just kidding i know that but okay we do get an update you knew it was coming right i you said palate cleanser so yes i was like there better be an update mm-hmm mm-hmm all right jeez i'll say yes sorry that's really nice i'm really really happy for them sorry that was a really great episode guys um no that's that's cute okay what else happened is that it no okay edit number two oh my god haven't raccooned in a while no it's actually making it look like you have like a glitter it's pretty beautiful yeah edit two we're going to watch harry potter on friday just need to decide what kind of food to order thank you for pushing me to say yes i honestly probably would have turned her down oh update three days later i know it's a different account got an auto mod message telling me i had to make a throwaway account so here i am i don't understand the rules oh it's annoying anyways the update that two whole people asked for me and you checking in yes we got together had some food and watched harry potter that's about it to be honest in all seriousness we hit it off pretty quickly i kind of feel like we were already friends anyways we usually talk a lot during appointments while she's getting all of her tools ready and such so i know a little about her already but not being in that setting made it easier to talk to her for sure yeah also confessed to a bunch of stuff found out she's had a crush on me since my first appointment two years ago and she was trying to figure out how to ask me out for a while also got to hear how she would purposefully get a light schedule when i was coming in so she could go slower and we'd have more time to talk which i think is the cutest thing i've ever heard oh a girl actually wanted to spend more time with me on purpose another thing i thought there were three harry potter movies not hundreds but we got through two of them and have another date set up for tomorrow so i'm not complaining also i had to take all of the tests so in case you're interested ravenclaw and i have a wood mouse patronus she seemed happy with that don't know why but she's in ravenclaw too so i'm sure that has something to do with it and lastly the entire reason i made my last post i talked to her about it and i do need to find a new dentist which kind of sucks but it's understandable and worth it not like i'll be missing her or anything because i can just talk to her whenever now unfortunately until all the dentists swap out i'm not going to be able to talk to her because i'm not going to be able to talk to her and i'm not going to be able to talk to her because i'm not going to be able to talk to her unfortunately until all the dentists swap out i'm not going to be able to talk to her is dealt with we are just friends but we both made it clear that we want to be something more spicy than that when we can this might be too much information for some of you but if i didn't include it someone would ask so no we didn't have sex and no puns about oral were made we were making out and she stopped it she felt uncomfortable doing anything with someone that was still a patient so we just cuddled and watched the movies instead and i drove her home afterwards honestly i wouldn't have it any other way oh i'm like kitty it was probably the best first date i've ever had oh i love being on this journey with you so cute that's awesome i'm just like this is so funny so anyone who follows me on instagram probably knows that i'm watching harry potter for the first time through i just i'm floored uh you've seen it all right yeah yeah i had no idea like when i was little i watched the first three movies when they came out in theaters and you thought that's all there was well i just didn't like i didn't piece them together i kind of thought that it was like these kids that would do these little side quests and then solve it and then you know it was like the boxcar kids i don't know what that is but sure but no it's just like well i didn't mean it like that i just it's a book he used to read them in like a school well that's what i thought harry potter was apparently but i just like i couldn't believe one how sad it was in the other movies i never expected that i didn't think anyone would die i thought they were like kids movies and i also just didn't know it would all tie together like the way that it everything all of a sudden started making complete sense and i just thought it was so magical and i love fantasy and i love magic type stuff so i just thought it was so fun and i can't believe it's been so long and i just think it's really cool that i got to experience that and i i don't know what to do now that's like what i had been looking forward to is like watching more and now i just feel kind of like what now have you seen um it's a show called the discovery of witches no i think you started there okay the white queen i love love the white queen oh maybe you start there okay start there okay the white queen that's all i got people are ill i'm ill after that my brain i feel like i have brain rot i'm like what what did i just put us through i actually feel less ill okay y'all lauren wants this spoiler alert if you haven't seen harry potter yet goodbye this is where we end for you yes love you thank you for being here yes okay yeah yeah that was a great palate cleanser i will say the other day when you posted a picture of dobby the elf oh my god i was like damn she's gonna be wrecked i was wrecked i was so pissed i can't even oh he's a free elf and then bam done unbelievable honestly sorry spoiler if you haven't seen harry potter i was gonna say you should probably add a spoiler before that you've had plenty of chances to see harry potter at this point no if somebody like i no one ever spoiled harry potter for me which is so cool i don't know how i don't know how you got to experience that and game of thrones in modern day without any spoilers i don't know make that make sense i don't know and you know what's so crazy is like i i truly did not know what happened to the point that i i started thinking harry potter was going to die oh yeah i was like yeah especially when he's in that white room yeah like he's i i don't i also i feel like i need to like give a spoiler again like can you put a spoiler like right before this insert spoiler please yeah okay we'll put a spoiler in for you okay okay amazing thank you okay that's all we got friends uh lauren will be on a patreon episode this month michaela's episode just dropped we've got one coming with justin all about wedding drama and holy smokes since we did the wedding episode until now the most insane wedding stories have actually dropped that i'm like wow wow wow wow wow i want to do three more wedding episodes because people are losing their minds but we can't well we could but i won't i won't do that to you so there will be a good one over on patreon but thank you for being here another episode another week another year i mean we're coming up to uh spotify is wrapped and i'm like oh i'm just feeling so blessed so grateful I just appreciate all of you. I appreciate all my amazing guest co-hosts. It's just been a wild, wild, wild year and I'm just beyond thankful. So thank you. If you noticed this episode, we have holiday trees on set getting very festive. These trees are going to be looking for a new home very soon. So if you live in the L.A. area and you need a Christmas tree this season, please comment on the Instagram or YouTube. I'm trying to make sure people can get some trees. So let me know. How are you going to arrange that? They're going to send me a message and then I'm going to send it to them in an Uber. Seems easy enough. Love that. Yeah. Yeah. There you go. Something special. Maybe if you know, if I have time, maybe I'll drive it over to you if you're close. But. How'd you come up with this idea? I'm just on the top of the brain. I like that. Yeah. It's cute. I know. These trees, let me tell you, me and Justin were fluffing them last night. My hands are raw. Raw, Lauren. Raw. It's like the tinsel. I don't know. It's a thing. But thank you guys. Love you. And until next time. Until next time. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Coca-Cola. For the big. For the small. The short. And the tall. Peacemakers. Risk takers. For the optimists. Pessimists. For long distance love. For introverts. And extroverts. The thinkers. And the doers. For old friends. And new. Coca-Cola. For everyone. Pick up some Coca-Cola at a store near you.