The Mandalorian & Grogu Ruined My Weekend | Vile And Horrendous Episode 5 | Joe DeRosa

Propel Fitness Water with Gatorade Electrolytes, Zero Sugar, and Vitamins. Propel hydrates better than water to help you get the most out of your workout and get back to your best self. What propels you? Propel with Gatorade Electrolytes. Cut that shit! Yo, people! Welcome to Vile and Horrendous. I am your host, the Vile Horrendous. Good to see you all again. Good to have you back with us. I'm happy to be here. We're actually, this is a first ever for the show. We're recording in the morning. We usually record in the evening. Today we're recording in the morning. I always thought we were a nighttime show. Maybe we're a daytime show. Who knows? But the energy's good. I feel awake. Not hungover. That's a rarity. I stayed in like a good boy last night. Didn't drink, but instead ate a cheeseburger with serrano peppers on it and a salami sandwich. And I feel like that's healthy living. Oh, before I forget too, thank you, not just for the positive response we've been getting for the show, but also the positive response we've been getting for the theme song. A lot of people seem to be enjoying it and they're asking what is it. It's my band, Salsa Windfall. It's a song that we haven't released yet, but we will release it soon. We were actually talking about it today, so I don't know. I'll keep you posted on that. We'll release it, and we'll release an instrumental version and then the regular version so you can enjoy it with or without me. Anyway, okay, singing, I mean, with or without me singing. Anyway, all right, look, let's get into this. We've got a lot to cover today. And there's another first for the Vile and Horrendous show. This whole episode has a spine straight through it. Straight through it. This is all kind of tied together today. For the most part, I just want to start with a plea, with a plea if I could. Star Wars, dear Star Wars, please stop. Stop. You have to stop, guys. You have to stop. I can't take any more. I have stayed with you loyally since I was a child. The first movie I ever saw in the movie theater was Star Wars. It's the first love of my entire life. I have been with you through every iteration of this franchise for better and for worse. And I have reached the end of my rope. I can't do this anymore. You keep hurting me over and over and over and over and over again. What am I getting at? Well, it's going to launch us right into a brand new segment. Folks, you know I used to have a movie podcast. And this is not a movie podcast. But sometimes I might talk about movies on here. And that is what this segment is for. This is D-View. All right. I went to see, and this is what I started talking about at the top. I went to see The Mandalorian and Grogu. There it is. It's one of the many posters they released to get me excited. One of the many posters they released that screams, Star Wars is getting back to basics. Star Wars is getting back to basics. Boy, did we go astray. Boy, did we go sideways for a while there. But man, we're getting back to basics. They put out posters like this. All of them harken back to the old sort of poster art style of Star Wars from the original trilogy era. All of these posters harken back to the sort of feel and vibe of the 50s and 90s. 1940s and 50s serials and all that sort of thing. And boy, were we all excited, especially as they announced that Kathleen Kennedy had departed the company. So I went to see The Mandalorian and Grogu. You can take the pic down. I went to see The Mandalorian and Grogu opening day like a fucking dumbass. 2 p.m. in the afternoon on a Thursday. Mandalorian and Grogu, this is a perplexing movie. It is perplexing how such a. such a simple plot line could still somehow be convoluted. It is perplexing to hear a musical soundtrack that is somehow contradicting itself with synth scores going up against orchestral pieces. It's perplexing to see CGI in a movie that looks impossibly worse than it did when Lucas first introduced it to the franchise when he did the special editions back in the late 90s. Finally, it's perplexing that a Star Wars movie, the first one in, I believe, it's seven years, I think, could somehow almost put you to sleep in the movie theater instead of filling you with, at the very least, the joy and excitement of escaping to a galaxy far, far away for two hours. The Mandalorian and Grogu, this is not the way! God damn it, it sucked! Fucking terrible movie, but look, that's moving us right into our first segment, You're Wrong. We've never started with You're Wrong. This is a big first, a lot of firsts today here at the Violent Horrendous Show. Folks, let's talk about AI. Let's talk about AI. There's a lot of reasons people love this new technology, and in many ways, hey, I can relate if I'm being honest. What's not to like about science? Science is something that'll make your dumbass seem more efficient and intelligent. If I didn't know how to write a sentence, or speak properly, or communicate, and there was a machine that would do it for me, well, you know, I'd be all over it. I would love it too, but I guess I'm old school. I learned how to express myself, you know, using shit like punctuation and grammar and speaking my own words. These were the ancient ways, people. It was a better time. But the biggest arguments, of course, are not for AI. The biggest arguments are against it. The most you hear about AI is people saying, it's going to be bad. We need to get rid of it. We need to. I'm going to stop for a second. Guys, I thought this monitor was a good idea so I could see you. It was a terrible idea. It's so distracting. I wanted to be able to see the people in the booth. They're moving around. There's all kinds of whispering, plotting. That's not normal, though. No, shut that fucking monitor off right now. In fact, can you feed my shit to this monitor, too? Just feed it over. I don't want to see you guys. And leave this in. Don't cut this part. Because I'll get back to the argument I'm making. Don't worry. Yeah. There you go. You can feed the stuff on this one over to here. I don't care. I don't need to see myself, either. That's worse. That's even worse. This is beautiful. Great. We're back, people. Christ, it looked like the war room at the Pentagon. It was like, everybody's walking around, hunched over. Mr. President. Remember when they told Bush about 9-11 at the tower? Can you get it? That's what it looked like. All right. Anyway, look. The biggest arguments are not for AI. The biggest arguments or most common and frequent arguments are against it. And the main argument is that it will take jobs away. And I always greatly supported this argument. You know, of course. Why wouldn't I? But I now realize there is an area of job destruction where AI will truly shine. And goddamn, folks, I am all for it. AI is going to destroy Hollywood. Hollywood. Hollywood, for the most part, seems deathly afraid of AI. They want to protect the current system. Well, if you're one of these people who's on the side of corrupt money being wasted, vanity building, a cancerous institution known as Hollywood, and you want it to last forever, well, I just want to ask you one question. What the fuck are you protecting? Have you gone to the movies lately, people? I have, as you already know, that I talked about at the top of the show. We're not watching anything real anymore anyway. I'm watching this Star Wars movie. It's seen. After scene, after scene, where the only real actor in the scene is the guy inside the Mandalorian suit, which, by the way, isn't even Pedro Pascal. He's so goddamn lazy, he won't even wear the suit. He does a voiceover, and then he has them dub the voiceover with another guy in the suit who's on set doing all the actual work. So what you end up looking at is one human being, one human being, who's been superimposed in front of a fake environment, and is surrounded by either puppets and or computer-generated characters. Again, I ask you, what the fuck are you trying to save, Hollywood? What are you trying to save? If you're asking me to make a decision, and that decision is between spending $150 million to make some benign, boring, completely forgettable, fake fucking movie, okay, or spend 10 cents to make something infinitely better that could be done on one computer by one nerd who lives in the middle of Idaho, I'm going with the nerd in Idaho doing AI shit. I'm sorry. I just am. What propels you? This Labor Day at Lowe's. Get up to 45% off select major appliances. Plus, deals on select materials and tools to keep the job moving. Right now, get a free DeWalt 20-volt max battery two-pack when you buy a select DeWalt 20-volt max tool. At Lowe's, we have what you need to keep your job moving. Valid through 9-13. All supplies last. Selection varies by location. See Lowe's.com for more details. I mean, by the way, aren't we all supposed to be against the gross, the disgusting abuse of capitalism and indulgence and the spending of exorbitant amounts of money? Aren't we all supposed to be against that now? Don't we all think that's bad? Well, well, of course we think it's bad. Unless it's Hollywood. Unless it's the next Avengers or whatever the fuck. Then, then that's fine. Then that's fine. All this shit. Capitalism. You know, gross spending of money. Embarrassments of riches. It's all disgusting unless it's a Hollywood franchise. Then it's just fine. Anyway, don't get me wrong, people. I want to be clear about something here. I don't want to see any technology alleviate jobs. I truly don't. But it's bound to happen. Okay? That's what technology does. Period. And don't get on your high horse about this. Okay? Don't get on your fucking high horse. Okay? Do you use a laptop? Do you use an iPhone? Do you use an Android even? If you do, shut the fuck up. Shut the fuck up. Okay? Would you like to use Google to look something up? Or do you want to pay a skyscraper full of people to do it for you? You're using Google. Do you self-check out at the grocery store? Shut the fuck up. You've contributed to someone's job being taken away. My point is, we're all okay within our own limits on technology alleviating jobs. Okay? So, even though I'm complicit, even though I'm complicit, I don't want to say, I don't ever want to see technology alleviate jobs needlessly. Of course not. If you're doing true, good work, and by the way, on this subject specifically, independent filmmakers still are. You still are. It would break my heart to watch something that's automated take that away from you. But I got great news for the indie filmmakers out there, the indie actors, the indie crowd. You're not going anywhere. The machines will never be able to capture the brilliant and around-the-clock technology that you're using. So, I don't want to original ideas and emotions and experiences you convey, mainly on the smaller screens. There's a reason why all of that is being shuffled over to the smaller screens, and we're seeing absolute dreck on the big ones. So I'm all for protecting writers and actors and directors who are doing good work. But let's please, let's please stop fucking pretending that those are the Hollywood people behind these sanitized pieces of popcorn-selling shit that we're going to watch. It's just, it's not the case. There wasn't some struggling scribe sitting in the corner of an Irish pub banging his keys away on a laptop on the script for The Mandalorian and Grogu. That wasn't happening. It wasn't, oh God, if I could just get this made, man, this is my dream. I got to tell you too, by the way, after watching this film, I'm not positive the thing wasn't written by AI. It's one of the worst scripts I've ever encountered, and that's saying a lot, okay? And by the way, I love Jon Favreau. He directed it. I love Jon Favreau, and I think he's directed some really cool stuff. I think he's been a part of some really cool stuff. But I don't believe for a fucking second that when he first set his feet on Hollywood soil for the first time, he was sitting there going, oh, if only, if only my dreams could come true. And one day I'll get to direct a half-assed offshoot of an ailing Star Wars TV series for Disney. This is nobody's dream. This is manufactured studio plastic bullshit, okay? And as for the actors, as for the actors, we already established, there aren't any. There aren't any. As for Pedro Pascal, I'm sorry, fuck him. Fuck him. His heart isn't in any of this shit. His heart. His heart ain't in it. He's there for a paycheck and to raise his profile. And let's just, benefit of the doubt, devil's advocate, let's just say his heart was in it. Let's just say he really did care and wanted Star Wars to be great. Again, I ask you, what are we protecting? What are we protecting? Shuffling the same multimillionaire across six different franchises? Is that what we're trying to do here? Isn't that a bit gluttonous? Because that's all. We're doing Pedro Pascal. He's in the Marvel, DC, and Star Wars universes, for Christ's sakes. Isn't that a bit greedy of him? Isn't that like, oh, I don't know, kind of like him taking jobs away from other people? Could be. Nobody seems to care about that aspect of it. Nobody seems to care. Taking jobs away from people is just fucking fine as long as it's Robert Downey Jr. doing it. How much fucking money do these people need? How much fucking money do they need as they, by the way, go on talk shows and bitch about billionaires? By the way, have you listened to an interview with any of them recently? They sound less human than a goddamn speak and spell. At least the AI program attempts to mimic human emotion. It kind of tries. I mean, it kills me because there was a time when Hollywood was amazing. There was a time, and I'm lucky enough to have lived through a portion of that. I got to see it, like I talked about earlier in the show. I was around when Star Wars first started, when this summer blockbuster thing kind of really came into its own. I got to see it, and it ruled. It ruled. It was awesome. It was awesome. So here's the thing. Here's my advice to all the panicking Hollywooders. Fear the end of the world as they know it. Step the fuck up. This is pathetic. This is pathetic. I can't hit that word hard enough. This is fucking pathetic. The fact that you're worried a computer is going to be able to outdo what you're doing, it means you're not doing it to begin with. Period. Hollywood, don't get me wrong. Please, I do have some sympathy here. Don't get me wrong. There are still some things AI will never be able to do as well as you do. Malicious children, assault women, perpetuate racism, and yes, waste as much money as humanly fucking possible on a movie that nobody wants to exist, let alone watch. When it comes to disappointing humanity and the public, Hollywood, you're the tops, and you always will be. All right, let's move on to your wrong. Oh, no, that was your wrong. I'm all mixed around. That was your wrong. Let's move on to moron, morons. I want to talk to you all about the second most horrific thing that was happening inside that movie theater outside of the movie itself. The only thing worse, the only thing worse than publicly watching, one of these pieces of shit and having your nostalgic childhood soul shattered is the experience you have to endure in order to watch it. All right? Which I mean, of course, is going to the movies. Going to the movies. Let's start with the concession stand. People, what I am about to show you is real. This is not a doctored image. Do not adjust your screen. Can we see the image, please? I want you to look at number two, appropriately numbered. $36. Look at that. Popcorn, two sodas, M&M's. $36. This is fucking crazy. This is crazy. All right, pull it down. $36 for popcorn, soda, M&M's. Popcorn, soda, and M&M's. Not just popcorn, soda, and M&M's. I want you to really think about this. $36 for corn. Fake. chocolate and two soft drinks that could eat the fucking tread off your car tires, alright? I'm not going to get hung up on the fact that we're literally being gouged to eat poison, okay? It's been happening for a long time in this country, but what I am going to go off on is the fact that this meal, if you made it yourself, would literally cost $3.78. And there is no universe, not even one far, far away, where corn, sugar, and aspartame cost more than steak and lobster. Show me the second pick. This is from Sizzler. Show it to me. This is real. This is real. Look at that last one. Steak and lobster, $31.99. It is cheaper to get steak and lobster at Sizzler than it is to get popcorn, M&M's, and two sodas at the fucking movie theater. I want to punch in. I want to punch in. Go to the next pick, please. Look at this. Upgrade your steak to eight ounces for an extra $3.99. Folks, if you upgrade, it's still cheaper. It's still cheaper, alright? And please, go to the third punch in. This gets better and better. Unlimited items are priced per person. Please. Please, no sharing. You know what that means? It means that meal comes with the unlimited salad bar. You're getting eight ounces of steak, a lobster tail, sides, and an unlimited salad bar for less than the movie theater meal. It is fucking crazy. Look, the only way any of this could make any sense is if Sizzler is selling actual dog food, okay? Which, they might be. Or the movie theater is aware of some looming shortage of corn that's coming. Neither are good, okay? Anyway, you buy your bullshit at the concession stand, because you have to. You're there. You're like, "What am I, not going to fucking eat this shit?" You're there. So, now you're, I don't know, $50 in? Well, no, more than that, because that meal's for two people, theoretically, right? You're $50 in. Anyway, you buy your bullshit. You're like, "I don't know. I don't know. I don't know." $60 in. And I got to tell you, people, I really, I really used to be one of those tyrants, okay, when I went to the movies, that I had to get there before the preview started. What propels you? Roll out. Roll out. Roll out. Right now, get a free DeWalt 20-volt max battery 2-pack when you buy a select DeWalt 20-volt max tool. Valid through 9-13. While supplies last. I mean, I was really hell-bent on it, all right? That was, to me, very much as important a part of the experience as the movie itself. I can't let go of it. I don't know why I do this to myself anymore. I still get to the movies like 15 minutes before start time so I can make sure that everything is in order and I am in my seat when those previews. Why am I doing this to myself? Because here's what happens. You're sitting there. At the time the lights are supposed to go down, the first thing that happens is announcements. Announcements. They start coming out on the screen in the form of just still shots and short videos. And what are the announcements about? Silencing your phone. One after the next. Six announcements telling you to silence your goddamn phone. Okay? Fine. So you do. And why do they have you do this? Well, I'll tell you. I'll tell you why. So then they can play you six fucking commercials. Commercials. I'm not exaggerating. I counted. Six. Silence your phones, please, so you can't interrupt these commercials. I'm silencing my fucking phone to watch Jennifer Aniston sell smart water. That's what I'm silencing my phone for. This is what I'm quieting for. To watch a woman that I have slowly fallen out of love with over the last year. Over the last 20 years. Pimp a product she doesn't need the money for. Also, smart water. Maybe know your audience. Nobody at this fucking movie theater wants to buy a dildo-shaped bottle of refreshing water right now. Okay? We're here to fill ourselves with chemical waste while we poison our brains with what's on the screen. Know your audience a little bit. It's like playing smart water commercials at Burger King. It's the wrong place. And then, guess what? Guess what? No trailers. No trailers before the Mando and Grogu. None. Just six commercials straight into the movie. Now, on the one hand, I was kind of relieved because I'm at least cognizant enough of what, you know, that whatever I saw a trailer for, I wasn't going to want to see anyway. So I knew I wasn't missing anything. But then I really thought about it. I really thought about it. And I was like, I was like, this is fucked. This is fucked. Okay? It's one thing for an industry to pimp its own product on us. It's one thing for Hollywood to show us trailers because that's what they're selling. Okay? You go to a movie theater. The studio that made the movie you're about to watch makes other movies. They want you to see those other movies. You're in a movie house that's going to show those other movies. That makes sense. Trailers are commercials for the product. Within the establishment, you're whatever. But to show us commercials for a completely different thing, to inundate us with advertisements for things they want us to be purchasing in other areas of our lives, this is sick. This is sick. And it's happening everywhere, by the way. This is not just the movie theater. It's happening everywhere. It's happening on airplanes, which I'm going to delve into on a later episode. But it's just, it's happening everywhere. Can this sick fucking society, can this sick fucking society go 10 seconds without advertising something to us anymore? 10 seconds without showing us a fucking advertisement. I got to be honest with you. I'm shocked there wasn't product placement in the Star Wars movie. I'm shocked at one point I didn't see Grogu eat a Snickers bar in the middle of the goddamn movie. This is sick. This is sick. And finally, finally, after addressing all of the movie theater industry's bullshit and whatever and blah, blah, blah, blah, their terrible acts and abominations, finally we come to the people, the general public, that you must sit amongst when frequently, frequently, fuck, frequenting an establishment such as, I'm going to say it again, so you can see how the sausage is made, people. The general public, you are forced to sit amongst when you are frequenting, right? Yeah. An establishment such as a movie theater. This is the real reason I must never return to a movie theater. It's the people. As mad as I am about everything else that I've spoken about on the show today, the people are by far the worst offenders. You know, because we're the ones that are supposed to know better. And we don't. This couple, they sat down next to me. They would not shut their fucking mouths from the second they barely squeezed their husky asses into the seats till the minute the closing credits rolled. And they were clearly a couple. Don't these people talk enough to one another at home? Is anybody else tired of this? Is anybody else tired of hearing couples talk in public? How much more do you people need to fucking talk to one another? The whole point of leaving the house is to get a break. Save the convo for at home so you don't fucking kill each other or ruin your marriage with utter boredom. But no, let's not just talk in public. Let's talk through a goddamn movie in public. It's unbelievable. It happens every time I go to the movies. It used to be once in a while there'd be some asshole or some smart-ass kid, teenager, whatever, you know, that wouldn't shut up during the movie or didn't really get the rules in the movie or whatever or was trying to be funny and it's annoying. I swear to God, it's every single time that I ever go to a movie and I'm talking, I've been clocking this for years, literally years now. It is every single time I go to a movie, there are multiple people who will not stop talking. People that literally don't know how to be outside of their house. They don't know how to change the. behavior for public situations. And before anybody attempts to get racist, they've all been white. Not all of them. But a lot of them. So don't start with any nasty shit in the comments. You know what we need to bring back? We need to bring back drive-in movie theaters. Everybody in their own car. Zero space being shared. Drive-ins were once very popular and then they faded away. You know, they kind of just faded away and movie houses became, you know, the only thing. But then drive-ins came back during COVID. Why? Because it was quarantine movie watching. Okay? That's what we need to bring back. Quarantine movie watching. That's how bad the public has become. The public is so shitty. Okay? It's so shitty now to mix in with people in a post-COVID society. You'd actually prefer things to go back to the way they were during COVID lockdown. I know sitting in your car privately to watch a movie isn't that much different from streaming in your house. You know, because you at least see the other cars and whatever. Here's my point. I'm not being clear. I know what you're thinking. You're thinking, well, sitting in your car, well, then you might as well be home. Here's the thing. Sitting in your car amongst other cars, it gives the illusion. It gives the illusion that you're sort of connecting in some way to society, but you're actually not connecting. Okay? And I think that's what we need right now. Okay? We need this. We need this. Look, it's what we're doing anyway. We all love virtual reality. We all love this digital simulation we're all living in. Let's just push it a little further and be in public, but be in pods in public. That's kind of what a drive-in movie is. Do you get what I'm saying? I think that's the only way we can continue to see other people and not begin hurting and murdering one another on a greater level than we already are. We have to be in containment units where we can see the other people without interacting with them. Drive-in movie theaters, let's bring them back. I think it's a great idea. So, anyway. What are we left with when we go to the movies these days? We are being overcharged to eat garbage that you'll eat. You'll eat during a movie that is so boring you can barely stay awake, enough to even chew the garbage. Yet you only manage to stay awake to see the movie and chew the garbage because the people next to you are being so loud that you're filled with a burning fury. And before any of this starts, you get to watch a bunch of commercials. All in all, this once exciting, sometimes beautiful, sometimes magical, usually at the very least fulfilling experience, even though it was still overpriced, has been reduced to a thieving, empty, rage-inducing, even more overpriced venture that still somehow, despite not delivering on any level, is trying to squeeze you for even more of your money. Shame on you, movie studios. Shame on you, movie theaters. And shame on you, movie goers. You've turned someone like me, a staunch supporter of going to the movies in person, a person that prayed for these establishments to once again boom, you've turned somebody like me into someone who is now excitedly and actively praying for the collapse of the entire industry from soup to nuts. Which, by the way, would cost you $38 at a concession stand. All right, folks, let's move on. You know what? I'm gonna do something we've never done before here. Another first for today. And it wasn't on the agenda. And I mentioned it briefly in there, but we're gonna do a quick flight log. Cool? Flight log! Okay, I mentioned this in the last segment, and as I was talking, I was like, you know what, why not just cover this today? And it'll tie into this theme we have going where there's kind of a thread through everything today. But yeah, airlines, airlines. Look, we've talked at length on the show about how overpriced they are, about just the shameless thievery going on. You are paying a premium when you fly now for basic human convenience. It's really, really fucking disgusting. I've talked about it a lot in my act. I've talked about first class. You know, first class is bullshit. All first classes these days is a chair you can fit in. That's it. That's it. That's all it is. First class used to be a new experience. Not anymore. It's a chair you can fit in. And the way they get you to think it's a premium experience is they make coach so goddamn shitty that by the time you pay to upgrade to first class and you get up in those six seats up front, you're like, oh my God, my kneecaps aren't turning inside out. This is fucking beautiful. That's how it works. That's how it works. If you beat on somebody long enough, when you're not beating on them, they're gonna think you're treating them nice. That's what they're doing to us. It's really, really gross. NSA pre-check's another great example. They made us think that all of these security annoyances were absolutely necessary to stay safe, taking your shoes off, taking your jacket off, taking your computer out of the bag. Guess what? Turns out if you pay 150 bucks, none of that stuff's important anymore. You can just walk basically onto the fucking plane going through an old school rectangle gun detector like you used to walk through to go to the shopping mall. That's it. That's it. That's it. It all goes out the window for 150 bucks. They make it unbearable so you pay a premium so you can then feel like you're getting a decent experience and it's a hustle. It's fucking gross. But the grossest part of it is this. After all of that, whether you're in the first class seats or not, they are still showing you commercials, commercials on the screens coming through the speakers throughout the airplane for products you don't give a shit about. Showing you commercials and on top of it, pimping their fucking credit cards. Pimping their credit cards. This is so gross. Now, don't get me wrong. I have one or two airline credit cards. Why? I fly all the goddamn time. So, you know, I got the Amex so I can get into the lounge, you know, whatever. Sure. It's a nice perk of the card. All right? But for the most part, the cards they're pimping on these planes are not those cards. They're pimping day-to-day cards that people don't need. They're going to use. They're going to get themselves into further debt with these things. Okay? And they dangle this carrot. Well, if you do it today, you'll get a bonus of 75,000 miles. People, 75,000 miles don't get you shit. It doesn't get you shit. I mean, this is such a disgusting thing to throw this big bonus in people's faces to make them think they need to sign up for this card because, God forbid, this deal goes away. By the way, go home. You can get the fucking deal online. The deal always exists. You'll get an email every other day about this same fucking deal they're making you think you need to do on the airplane. And then these fuckers walk down the aisle with applications. They walk down the aisle with applications. It's like when you're walking through the street and there's somebody with a clipboard, the worst thing ever. You know what I'm talking about? You're just trying to go, you're just going to Target or whatever. Hey, sir, do you have a minute to save asparagus? Or whatever the fuck they're doing. No. And by the way, when I do have a minute, I'll do it at home. Why are you out here with a clipboard? You don't need to be. There's something weird going on here. It's just, why are you pushing this? Why are you pushing this on me right now? Well, I'll tell you why they're pushing it. Because they're trying to collect fucking names and numbers because they're not getting enough hits on the internet. There's not enough awareness. That's why. Yeah, well, that's the same reason they're pimping these fucking credit cards on the airline. They're not getting enough names and numbers and hits on the internet and applications on the internet. Right? Well, yeah, why? Because for the most part, credit cards are fucking bad. And people don't need these things. And it's not enough that you fucking stole from these people for them to get the most basic seat on the airplane, let alone one of the most, one of the upgraded ones. You're now going to try to con them, con them, into getting a piece of fucking plastic and then you're going to have to that's going to charge them 22% interest. Okay? And how are you going to con them? Because you got them in a confined space and you're going to make them think that 75,000 miles is worth signing for in this movie. Scare tactics. I studied advertising in college. My major was TV production. And we studied advertising because we had to understand how TV commercials worked. That was a big part of the, or not a big part, but it was one component of the major. And I'm sure as most of you know, intimidation is a primary form of sales. Intimidation. Making a customer feel, or potential customer feel, as if they don't buy right now, they will miss out greatly on something. That is what they are doing on these airlines. It is disgusting. It is gross. And then they make you think, well, if you use the card, then you can buy that next flight on the card instead of out of pocket. Do you see how sinister all this shit is? you see how sinister all this shit is well if we get them to sign up for our credit cards that'll make them less reluctant to charge airfare they can't afford to begin with and then we're going to get them on the 22 percent apr uh and and and also that carrot of miles and points and whatever that'll keep dangling because these fuckers aren't gonna aren't ever going to get to the point that they that they're going to have enough miles to really because that's the thing with the miles the average person doesn't fly enough to accrue enough miles to get any bonuses okay and by the way you can get more off of regular credit card points with an airline than you can with miles from an airline so and that's not me telling you to go do the credit card points thing i'm just saying that is truthfully how it works anyway airlines suck movie theaters suck hollywood sucks and star wars sucks everybody can suck my dick all right you , i'm exhausted already all right let's move on to our final segment for today what a world oh that came right back to me get out of here all right all right something positive from hollywood uh have you seen obsession yet i have not i heard it's very good yeah so obsession filmmaker curry barker gets eight figure offer for his next movie oh good for him hasn't even pitched it yet yeah good for him good for him why not let's keep up this trend of what could go wrong here he did a good thing that means he's got to do more good things well it couldn't possibly go sideways that's never happened before look i wish him well i hope he does well with it man and i hope his next thing is good but i mean for christ's sakes when will they learn with this when will they learn with this they do this all the time somebody has a really great sleeper hit kind of thing it's great your studio swoops in they go we're going to give you all this money because we think you're going to do it again without question and it's like okay well it's it's not that easy but you know i think when a studio does this what they're really doing is and this is again this this business is so sinister but this is the kind of they do and this is real this is not conspiracy brain uh excuse me churning away here this is real what they do is is they see a talented young person and they leap on it and they go let's give him a a deal he can't refuse as they said in the godfather an offer he can't refuse and what will that do well that'll keep him that'll keep him under our roof i hate that picture so much i hate that picture so much you know what now i hope it bombs um this is the guy i thought it was going to be like a i mean this is what i need to see more of what is he 23 how old is he he's 26 26. oh god i shouldn't say that i could meet this guy next week or something that's how it goes you talk all this then you run into the person so it's gonna have you in the next movie yeah look god bless man honestly but like it's it's you know they they oh but what i was saying was they do this thing where it's like they they they're like if we give him an offer he can't refuse we can keep them then under our roof you know and look they might not even make good on that next movie or they might string him along in development hell for so long under a contract that that money doesn't mean as much as it does five years from now as it does right now who knows or they might just be doing the honest thing and saying like you know we expect something delivered in in this many days or this many years and and here's the money go do it and god bless maybe he's able to do it and hopefully he's able to do it and probably i would assume a young tyke like this has a couple other scripts under his belt i doubt this is the only thing he's ever written so he's probably already said to them like here's my next idea and they probably said that's kind of cool so we'll see what happens he's older than the backrooms kid the kid that did backrooms is even younger even more frustratingly younger yeah he's 20. 20. i mean me i'm can i hang myself from one of these lights how strong are these things i'm 48 i'm sitting in an armchair at 11 o'clock in the morning praying for 20 000 views i mean it's just i called tim i called tim dylan the other day i go i'm done i'm gonna quit the business i'm finished he goes why i go because i'm sitting here looking at the youtube analytics of my latest podcast episode like i'm in the war room like it's coming through the feed and i'm just reading you know and i go and i wanted to take a break from driving myself crazy so i went online and the first news story i saw was nate bergazzi unveils blueprints for his new theme park and i was like i think i'm done i clearly zigged when i should have zagged i should say and i said tim i don't know what to do i don't understand this business anymore and he goes i think you should start coming up with rides i don't know what to do i don't know what to do i don't know what to do i don't know what to do uh that's not a knock at nate nate's one of my friends this is that's truly wild and amazing that he's doing this but it does make you feel like maybe you haven't achieved enough in your own life all right let's go to the next store look at that thing looks like i won't make that joke because it's nate i was going to make a joke but i won't nate land it's nate land so uh this one's kind of a follow-up of a previous one that we've covered a man accused of throwing rocket endangered seal barred from hawaii beaches oh the oh yeah i remember this yeah so now the guy's not allowed to return to hawaii and um he also has like a defense for why he did what he did i want to hear this defense because i still think it's odd i i it still seems to me a little odd that he was just trying to hit a seal in the head with a rock yeah so he he claims that his reason for doing it was i guess there was like some sea turtles nearby and he threw the rock to like scare the seal from eating the sea turtles does a seal eat turtles i guess so yeah but what well you know what this guy i was i was trying to go yeah you're gonna interfere with nature you dumb dickhead what an seriously i'm trying to protect the sea turtles i work at i work at cisco foods i'm a product manager at cisco foods i'm over here now in hawaii i'm going to try to protect the sea turtle i don't know where he works i'm just trying to think of a job of a guy that has no business interfering with nature nothing against cisco foods yeah and he had no idea that the seal was endangered you know he just thought it was just ordinary run of the mind he should yeah it look a seal's yeah yeah this i i think he's lying uh the only reason i'm the only reason i think he might not be lying is that's such a specimen if he's dumb enough to throw a rock at a seal's head i don't think he's smart enough to come up with the sea turtle excuse unless a lawyer gave it to him which i assume at this point he's got a lawyer on this but at the same time if he's smart enough to know the ecosystem of a sea a sea a seal excuse me eating sea turtles then maybe that is what he was actually doing uh and it would make sense that he's arrogant enough to try to interfere with nature like that but but banned from hawaii i mean that seems like every island or just the one he went to apparently just any hawaiian beaches oh he can still like go to hawaii and get face in the bars yeah i think he can i think yeah he can still go to hawaii but apparently he can't step foot on any of the beaches there how are they going to know this is what we're wasting our time on people with the authorities in different places you know what this yeah now every hawaiian cop has to be on surveillance watch for this guy if he walks onto a beach oh for christ's sakes you know what this guy and this seal all right i hate both of them now let's do one more all right uh so uh robert fripp is still unsure why hospital shaved his balls after heart attack wait did we talk about this one yet we have not who's robert fripp robert fripp he's the guitarist for um king crimson and what happened so he can you pull the story up yeah so he uh he just turned 80 recently and he suffered a heart attack yeah and he woke up and found his balls were shaved yes yeah they do that well they do that because sometimes they have to access the heart from the legs so they shave the area usually see he didn't know that well he's a moron he's 80 years old it's in a fucking fucking globally touring band. He doesn't know how this fucking works? You don't read on the bus, Rob? Sitting there listening to your own guitar solos all fucking day for 70 years in this band? Yeah. He's, you know, whatever. I'm not surprised. King Crimson has sucked since 1981. Man, they used to be awesome, though. Man, they were a fucking awesome band for a while. This picture is, this is a real picture? Yeah. This is not AI. No, this is a real picture. Yeah. I love, everybody's asking the wrong questions. Why did they shave my bulls? No, the question is why would you take this fucking picture? That's the question, Robert. Jesus Christ. That is not his body. You can see that the head, there's something weird at the neckline. Am I wrong? That head is on somebody else's body. Right? Yeah, that doesn't look real. Yeah, no, that's not real. That's not real. I mean, it's from Stereo Gum. I don't know if they post fake pictures. Well, what are they, asking questions? Jesus Christ. By the way, that picture is more entertaining than the last seven King Crimson records. Nothing worse than when an art rock band goes off the rails, people. I'm telling you, it's, look, art rock bands are already walking a fine line, but, so when they go off the rails, it sucks. It sucks. And it goes so fast from being amazing and mind-blowing like this music that creates a theater of the mind to like, it sounds like Ice Capades music. It's crazy. Just listen to, go listen to Yes in the 70s and then listen to Yes. Are you guys familiar with Yes in the Booth? The Pussyhounds? By the way, next episode, we're gonna address the submissions for the names. Pussyhounds, do you guys know Yes? I don't think that we are. Barely. Alright, well, for the few people watching that might know, this is what I mean. Runaround, Roundabout, excuse me, is one of Yes's most popular songs. Fucking awesome song. One of their big hits was from the 70s. I'll be the roundabout. It's a fucking awesome song. I do know that one. Yeah. Well, I saw a Yes concert in the latter years, meaning within the last, I don't know, 10 years or so. And they did Roundabout, and they did an all-acoustic version of it with bongos. So that's what happens. That's what happens. I wanted to throw a soda at the fucking stage. Anyway, protect Art Rock. Keep it good. Don't let it take pictures of itself in a hospital bed, naked, with a guitar. Alright. Folks, that's our show. Thank you for joining us. We appreciate it. We'll be back next week, because we are weekly now. Please subscribe to the show. Please hit those like buttons. Or that like button, whatever. We appreciate you being here. I'm going to be announcing some tour dates very soon. Go to JoeDeRosa.com Well, I'll announce on my Instagram, which is JoeDeRosaComedy, and the YouTube for me is at JoeDeRosaComedy as well. But some tour dates will be announced very soon. And then also, I will be at the Joke World Festival. I think it's August 14th and 15th. That's happening. So come on out to that. It's going to be a lot of fun down at the Coastal Creative in St. Petersburg, Florida. And as always, we leave you with my favorite segment dedicated to the crumbling mental state of white women in America. This is White Women! White Women! Singing the song of my soul. Beautiful part of the home. Yeah, it's great. Let's lift it up, let's put it down Let's run this game on the whole damn town, yeah Take it up, you gotta put it down Let's run this game on the whole damn town, yeah Have you heard that McDonald's Spicy Chicken McNuggets made with spicy tempura and a blend of aged cayenne are back? Remember to grab a few extra napkins for a limited time at participating McDonald's.