296. The Long Tunnel of Wanting You

[Music] Hi, I'm Liz. And I'm Reya. Welcome to Karma's My Bitch, a podcast about sex, love, magic, desire, purpose, bliss. And how life isn't simply the stories we tell ourselves. When the people say they're waiting don't have to be waiting. They could be having different experiences, but they're refusing because they're saying, "No, no, no. All of that looks like settling and I'm not going to." Ooh. But if this person's crossing your path, can you trust that there might be a reason? Can you be open enough to explore it? And then decide for yourself, as opposed to saying, but they're not showing up as "XYZ things as I have deemed it necessary to open my heart." You don't meet the person and then decide to open your heart. You enter it fully open-hearted. Every person who crosses your path. And you can decide next day, nope, you know, I think I was right. And you go on. Not with, you know, not with the sense of bitterness or frustration or anger, but well, that was an experience. Yeah. And then you're tuned. And your heart says, yep, learned that one, got it. Not going to go for that next time. Because your heart, the moment that makes that prints on your heart, you will tune those people out. Now, because your mind says, watch out for the flags. This, you know, you attracted this person once. You can't do that again. You're going to do it again, because your mind doesn't actually know what you're to look for. Your mind will start creating red flags that aren't there and ignoring the actual red flags. It's the heart that's the bullshit barometer. It's when we print that on our heart that we're like, "Got it." We keep trying to connect with the mind to the one thing that involves only the heart. Yes. Yeah. What does the mental body do in relationship? The mental body is good for two things in relationship. And it's great. It's actually great for two things. It's one, the first is recognizing all the possibilities and potential within that interaction. Because the mental body holds the map of your fate. So that's where the the mental body connects all those dots on the fate. Okay. Hey, here's somebody. But what the mind starts to do then, it says, "Well, if this person's significant and significant for these reasons, because if you haven't settled the ego enough, it's going to start connecting dots that are not there. They do this. This means this." Oh, the mind's literally being that little voice saying, "Ignore that." You've been disappointed before. No, no, no. And along with the theme of the possibilities and potential. Oh, fine, fine. Right? It's going to say, "Okay, well, then if that's the case, then doing this means this." The trap of that when the mind gets involved is that it starts projecting. So rather than acknowledge the future potential of something, it starts creating what expectations, expectations, and what it thinks it should look like. And thus be, and then that's what leads us to disappointment. So it takes the positive of the mental body and distorts it based on all its the separation experiences. Yeah. And the second benefit of the mental body when it comes to relationship has to do with finding context for the human behavior. As beneficial as the heart is in relationship, the heart is clueless when it comes to another person's intentions, not motivations, but intentions, which is why we say, you know, it's not, it's not, it's not just about how you feel, or how they make you feel, or they show you nothing, etc. Like how we have to use like a person's actions as a measure of their intentions, if you will. Now, it's not that the heart is wrong, but the heart can get it wrong. Because it wants to assign feeling. It's feelings matter, right? This makes me feel good. I'm going to keep feeling good. So when we don't have the most healed emotional body, or we carry a lot of memories from our previous karma experiences, or we just allow things to get influenced for whatever reason. The heart can kind of go like lead a stray, that is very possible. As much as we say, listen to your heart for yourself. When it comes to relationship, the mental body will sometimes say, hold on. Are you sure? Based on what this person is doing, not saying, but doing, are you sure about that? Now, I'm not saying the mental body is always right, but the heart does not always write either. And is this prior to. No, no, no, no, this is all the time. This is all the time. This can be post karma. This can be post hell. Because not everybody reads other people well. It's a certain skill. So when we are in full-bodied and in higher consciousness, we're much better at it. But depending on where our Achilles heel lies, are we always going to get it? I don't know. But that's why experiences will really start to tune the heart in such a way. Which is why I'm like, you're not always waiting. There are people who cross your paths who are opportunities, not necessarily to learn, but to gauge. Gauge yourself. Where are you? Because we just put these arbitrary timelines on ourselves. Well, okay, I've dated enough. Now it's time for something more serious. It's time to settle down. It's time to, you know, blah, blah, blah. I've got a clock, etc. But every time we start putting these arbitrary timelines on ourselves, is the moment our souls are like, we didn't come here for that. We may have. It might be written in your fate. But we needed these other things first. So quit trying to skip over those. Because you think that somehow you're going to get there without them. Makes sense? No. Fuck off. What I say, no, is that the heart gets it wrong. That's the bit that I want to understand. It does though, Rhea. The heart can get it wrong. Okay, so the heart is not wrong when it says, oh, here's this person. Great. I've opened my heart. There's nothing wrong with that. But if we use the heart to determine the role or the purpose of the person in our lives, that's where we could get tripped up. Yes. It's like imagining that the one night love affair will be the forever love affair when you haven't heard from them for six months afterwards. Yes. I don't fully understand this, or it doesn't. I can understand why. Because for somebody like you had alerted really trust her heart and her feelings. It sounds wrong. Yeah. I get that. But what we're saying is in the realm of relationship and a world in separation, the heart can get it wrong. And we have to understand that. And we have to accept it. And we cannot deny that. In post karma, if we've allowed ourselves for so long to operate a certain way. And we turn around and we're like, okay, but now I'm going to give everything over to the heart. And the heart is going to be right about all these people. We're also not honoring and respecting the rest of our bodies either. We're just giving everything over to the emotional body and saying, you take over. You're on the driver's seat now. I understand where the disconnect is. Because when you say heart, you're talking about the emotional body. Yeah. When I think of heart, I think of the spiritual body. No, no, no, no, no. It's the feeling of like, oh, I love this person. That's not spiritual body. Yeah, no, that's where that's where that's where that's where the person is. No, no, no, follow the guide. Right? That's why I think I was trying to feel like why I was like, what's going on here? Everything I believe is wrong. And then I was like, no, it's not at all. No, not at all. You're not wrong at all. Because actually there's a difference between like, I have definitely, like, they're a man that I look at. And I'm like, there have been men that I've looked at. And I'm like, you are not for me. And I know that deep inside. But I love you. And I'm able to hold both of those things. And the love doesn't mean as much. But if I forgot the other. It's a lot of careening as much. No, no, no, no. But it doesn't mean forever. Yes, that's what I mean. Whereas, you know, we always joke about when I've said to, oh, yeah, I fell in love for a night and things like that. Right? If I relied purely on my emotional body without listening to my knowing, etc. I would have gone myself into a lot of mess. Yeah. When I had, I had various ways. But I never doubted for a moment until I met Ricardo that I hadn't yet met the person I could spend the rest of my life with. I was always clear about that and I was never confused. Even if I, if I became like obsessive or fixated on a particular person. And granted there was somebody else that I thought, oh, yeah, he's meant to be. But because I was told as well. And then therefore I kind of fit that into a picture, which is why, you know, when it comes to psychics and stuff. You know, take it with a grain of salt. If you've had some train racks and some nice times and sexy times. And you just, you know, relationships are beautiful. How, you know, they allow us to learn a lot about ourselves. Because we don't learn about ourselves in a vacuum. Which is why relationships are so critical to one place. You could get to a point where something happens. And you find yourself face to face with someone who holds a lot of potential. And by potential, I don't mean potential you've assigned them. You know what I mean? They have ex-wise equalities. I feel this one when I'm in their presence. Thus it could be. it could be. You're looking for more when it comes to potential. Potential in bliss looks like I'm committed, okay, so like you are committed to your individual purpose and your pursuit of your purpose does not interfere with the connection that you have with this person. So nice. And that my desire for your happiness, for my desire for your happiness is as great as the desire I have from mine. Oh, that is also really nice. It's a nice feeling. Both of those things are nice feelings. Yeah. Which means nobody's operating while they operate autonomously, they do not operate selfishly. So there is no level of real self concern. It's not the I gotta go get my shit together, hang on. We're really actually both in a very similar place. That's what that looks like. So this is actually possible before bliss. I'm not saying well you have to wait to bliss to get to this. Not at all. Oh my god. Like what would be the point? I mean, I just throw this out by the way. I would not have found this acceptable at all. But we grow and evolve into it. So just as you said how in previous seasons we had these conversations, but by the time you're approaching bliss and you're much more in your own power, we exercise power and you see what it's like in your reaching divine consciousness, how much more meaning and deeper and media these things have. Yeah. It's like that. So you can have versions of this and as you grow as you evolve, because you rest up growing in bliss, but as you grow and evolve, the experience of it just gets deeper. That's so nice. Yeah. Yeah. Growing into this covenantal relationship is the step toward covenantal union. The distinction between covenantal partnership and covenantal union has to do with the fact that union is the promise that nothing will sever the physical connection until the end of our lives. Oh, I actually thought that was really cool. It pretty much means nothing. Nothing will suffer this physical connection. The level of consciousness required for this is quite high because it actually says, I'm going to put this in this, you know, I'm going to say this. It means that there will actually, I will allow for no temptation. If I have vowed this physical relationship with you, I will not even tolerate a temptation for another. And let me tell you, it's actually not that hard. It really isn't. You'd be super. I know a lot of people would be like, I don't know how you do that. I don't think that's possible in other relationships. You know, you have these moments, no big deal, right? And I'm like, yeah, cool, but actually you'd be surprised by how so tuned your heart is into this partnership. It wouldn't even occur to you. It would not even occur to you. You could, from your mind, fantasize, you could project, you could imagine, like, you know, but actually the feeling wouldn't even be there. The desire would not be there. Can you have that only once I did? No, no, it would be, it would be the same because you wouldn't tolerate a person having a weaker link to you than you would with them. You wouldn't bother. And union presupposes that our partner is similarly evolved and open-minded. So even if they have a different growth trajectory as in, perhaps their paths were different, they grew up somewhere else, you know, they, their values and standards are similar and they're guided by love or light, whatever it is you want to call it, but they are open-minded like you. So it's kind of like how you said you had, you might have different backgrounds and, you know, maybe in an old paradigm, what mattered was how things looked on paper. That would not be the case here, y'all. Yeah. And when we say similarly evolved, actually they're like, no, no, no, you can't, I can't even caveat this. Who like says what it says on the tent? It's true. They have to be similarly evolved. They cannot be, if you haven't figured out, they cannot be going out and figuring it out because by the time they've caught up to you, you're already beyond. But also what does figuring out even mean, I think that's what you were trying to say is that you know who you are, it might not be expressing in the exact way like you don't have to, you know who you are, you know what you stand for and you're expressing your purpose, but it hasn't maybe necessarily been like, I don't know, published yet. When we're looking at Covenantel Union, no, you're there. You're there. Okay. There's no like even if even if you're incrementally beyond them, it cannot be that great. Okay. So that gap is going to be pretty small. Okay. Yeah. I mean, I'm sitting here trying to caveat everything. You're like, then it can be this. I don't want anyone to think that this is not attainable because I do, I know not just in my heart, but I know it's possible. As we've always said, if this information comes through, then it is possible. It is written. So for us to describe it, it's not because it's unattainable. A lot of it has to do with where are you in your divine expression that you can ingress the potential and possibility for this? Where are you in this old paradigm? Are you that embedded that you cannot actually see beyond and grasp that perspective? Because that's what this is meant to call into question. If this doesn't seem possible to you, then that shows you where you are. Yes, that makes sense. If love is in capital L OVE, but then also love as in all caps, L OVE, are the basis for our partnership model in our post-carmic lives, which incorporates our full faith. Imagine then how it blossoms when we're confronted with the potential for bliss. What do you mean? So is in how much it can get bigger because one or two, both of you are going into bliss? Yes, and how much that can actually permeate out into the world. So you know how you talked really beautifully about devotion and purpose and how pouring all that light through that devotion into your purpose and how that really spreads? Well, bliss is not purpose. If you can be in bliss with another and have this level of union, how much that can permeate the world? But what happens if one person, there's a potential bliss, but one person does and one person doesn't? It can still work. Okay. It just has to be that their commitment to happiness and purpose is really profound. Okay. And that the main foundations for oneness and oneness consciousness is really there, which is again what we said in the previous episode, tolerance. I mean, I keep repeating it so people really grasp the significance of these words. It's tolerance, respect, harmony, and peace. Those have to exist within the dynamic at all times. Those are not negotiables. Like, oh, there's some degree of respect because they do this. If there is any semblance of disrespect within that unit, it weakens. Can you get over it? Can you cure it? Can you compensate for it? Or transform it? No. Transforming has to, this has to exist for transformation. Okay. Five, five, five. Right. But if the, if the disrespect can it get healed? Can have connection be found? Where then respect comes in? Right? I mean, God, they're just being so absolute about this. They're like, not when it comes to union, this shit's a given. Okay. Pretty clear about this. That those traits and values to some degree are going to exist. And by some degree, we mean 100%, but it may not be the 100% of like, bliss, 100%. Fine. They're just immediate and givens. It's not that we'll though fix themselves and therefore, because the level of rewiring required is we've discussed, takes time. And if you're not there because you're already beyond it, how much rewiring are you going to sit through? Yeah. Because like you said, and when it came, when it came to dating and your Carmen stuff, how distracting and how much work it was, you can't turn somebody into a project. Not when you're this far along in your evolution. But what about those stories? And it's funny, I'm using this as an example because I used it in the last one. What about those stories? I don't want people to think, oh, well, you know, no, I don't like throwing, I feel like that's really destructive. Because again, that's just putting rules on stuff. And I just think anyone can do anything. So like, it's actually, but we're not putting rules on things. We're not saying, oh, if this doesn't exist, they're not for you. If you're coming across people who are like that, then this isn't time. It's not time for this. And that's okay. Our point is, is like, stop actually listening to the people who tell the rules, who give you rules so you can get here. Yeah. What we're saying is don't take anyone who crosses your path, that you're attracted to, that you find interesting. We said this since day one, go for it. It's going to get you what you want to where you want to go a lot faster than if you're sitting there and being like, oh, no. So what we want to really see in full harmonious partnership in this dynamic are three things. And you're going to love these things because these are all you, right? Like, I love that. I was like, I could serve up these things that are going to be really like 100% natural and like right to you, which is, you know, integrity, which is I'm going to treat you as the divine person you are. Which you've already, you have in spades because you said I can always recognize the potential in others. - Yeah. - But, but actually I have to explain this for a moment. Just because you can see the potential in others, you have to hold yourself with integrity first. - Yes. - That's really what it is. - Integrity is the energy that governs this dynamic is not only honest, but it is seeing you for who you are as I see myself for who I am. - Yeah. - That's lovely. - Yeah, that's a really nice way to say it. And the second one is your favorite love. So, being with you inspires me to shine my light as bright as I can. - Ah, yeah. I feel like this episode has done a lot of us. - Yeah, no, I like it. I mean, it really is. Like, this is like great partnership. And the third piece is truth, which is the divine exists. I mean, you know, there's only one truth. I mean, whatever, but I'm gonna say this, okay. So we have it in the episode. But the truth is the divine exists in all that we do. So, within this dynamic, the divine is in everything. And it's not because I prayed about it and we prayed together. That's not it. That's not what brings the divine in all we do is because we acknowledge that we are the divine. So it's, I'm like, I'm trying to find a way to say this. So it just grounds, but it's just, God, we are just our fucking best selves. But not from an ego place or anything. We are just fucking amazing. (laughing) I don't know. Like, I'm trying to like not define this to death. - I mean, the thing is with all of this, you can define it and talk about it, but when you feel it, you know. - Yeah. - And that's really, that's all, that there's no, like I understand why everything is almost so strict because it's just, when you feel it, you know. But that's where the spiritual body comes in. And that's where that feeling comes from. It's recognition. - So you might think you're in love with someone, but your soul knows really. So when I say, when you know, you know, that's actually probably the truest thing ever. - Absolutely, absolutely. It is not, it's not a lie. Now let's be fair. Not everybody knows when they know, not everybody has that experience. And that's because they shut off the mechanism for it. And it's not necessarily because they don't trust themselves any longer, they just stopped trusting themselves at some point and forgot to turn it back on. 'Cause they were like, "Mm, that doesn't feel right to me. That doesn't feel. " - It's not even a true, it's weird, 'cause I keep, I'm like, is it really, is it a trust issue, is that they don't feel safe? And they were like, "No, it's not that." - It's just shut off. - You've just shut off. - So they're not necessarily looking for proof. They're just becoming, they're just gonna rely on their, their mental body to tell them, to give them the answer. - And even if you have like bits of your spiritual body still reminding you of the truth. - Yeah, no, no. - Your mental body will keep trying to shut it off. Your mind. - Your mind will just force you to question. It's like, "Well, how much more proof do you want?" - Yeah. - So, but we have it, we also need to accept it. As we said in a previous episode about separation, we need to accept that we haven't been wrong about our relationship paradigms, but they've been evolving into. But since we've been, like, as in, we know things were just supposed to change and things were supposed to be different, right? There's this notion of, like, we've moved so far beyond, you know, the traditional relationships where things were, that now we've just wrecked it. Like, you know, there's this idea that, but no, we've been needing to go in this direction to the point where we've had to wreck that so we can build a new. It is the one thing that we've been allowed to burn down 'cause do you remember how you kind of said like and we've said in the karmic stories, we can't destroy this world to such a degree we have nothing to build from. - Yes. - This is actually one paradigm we get to destroy. - Okay. - We don't need hallmarks of anything old that taints this because they have been so distorted and fucked with us. And so the beings that were meant to become just as our younger generations, they're just gonna bring in something new and that's just how we're gonna be better off. - That's nice. - And that's what we've been seeing and which is why we've been allowing this to happen and other people are over here like, oh, are you sure about that? You're throwing out the baby with a bath water. This is a little too extreme here and you're like, I don't know, but somehow this feels right. So as you said, sometimes you have to destroy something in order to give the hope for that connection to blossom differently. - Yes. - Completely, absolutely. And so it's been really difficult to understand how this has been playing out because then we're looking at this and we're attaching our karmic stories to it and we keep confusing things. So we just kind of keep remaining out of integrity with this whole thing in the process. But it's really important that rather than sort of see this and be like, I give up. As you said, I think in a previous episode, capitulation is the answer and solution to separation, not in oneness and that's exactly right. If we think that it's just been too long, I've been holding out for so long, I've been waiting so long, I've tried everything in nothing sticks, so it's not meant to be, that is not the approach. And we're not here to say, hang in there, it gets better. We're constantly saying, hang in there because you get better. I think those are your works. You get better at this and you don't get better at the game though. - You get better just not giving you any energy to it. - God, it would be so, like, I mean, it would seem the most pointless thing. Imagine like, if you did all of this and you still didn't get what you wanted, why would we even be here? Why would even this work keep evolving? Why would these concepts keep deepening? If we can be in a place where this can even be something we can wrap our minds around even a little, then it means it's possible. - Yes. - And so we have to, and I remember, I can't remember where it was or where I heard this from, but it's just like, it would just be a real shame to throw it all away just before the finish line. 'Cause it is meant to be. It is meant to be good. And that's been the point. The point has been love. We've lived through this time, we've lived through this entire endeavor. And we've done it for things to get better. That's why we've gotten out of the better in the morning. That's why we do this work. That's why we live. That's why we put our hearts into everything. And it's why we listen to ourselves and we keep listening to ourselves. Because we're allowing for the hope that it gets better. We're trusting in the hope that it gets better to make it real. And it's not for it to be the same or for it to be worse. 'Cause it can't be worse if there's love in it. It can only be better. So all we can do is just keep approaching with love, with an open heart and allow that trust and that spiritual connection to come back. Because that's, without spiritual connection, it can open everything, including all the possibilities and all the potential and make it real. This episode is brought to you by Karma Magic Bliss. For more information, resources and links to our books, check out our website, KarmaMagicBless.com and Karma Magic Bliss across all socials. 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