The Jake Shane Episode

♪ His name is Jake ♪ ♪ Jake what? ♪ ♪ Jake what? ♪ ♪ Shane ♪ ♪ Jake Shane ♪ ♪ Jake Shane ♪ ♪ Jake Shane ♪ ♪ He was a little pain ♪ (crowd cheering) - You excited for Shane to come? - Shane Jake? - Yes, Shane Jake. - I am excited. I've never met him. - I've seen clips of him online. It seems like he's a prominent podcaster. - Do you know how he actually started? - He. - What? - I was just going to make a joke. - Oh, you want to make it? - Do you want to tell me to joke first? - Oh, check, make your joke. - It's not a good enough joke. It's why I didn't say it. - What is it? - A sure microphone and a dream. - Is that even a joke? - A Shane microphone? - No, sure, like an SM. - Yeah, I know, I know it sure is. - That's how he started. - You know what? - All right. - It's a little hot. - Get a little hot. - We'll take off the blanket. - Maybe with all the jokes you're getting. You're going to save them for Jake? - I'm going to make a lot of jokes to Jake. - Really? - I need you to tell me about what's in front of me, so I can start eating. - What's in front of you? This is a beautiful pineapple. Wait. Why is the lava cake brown? - It's the new Domino's Smoor lava cake. - Are you telling me this thing's a Smoor? - Yeah. - Domino's Smoor. - You never had it. It's new. - Oh my God. - Yeah, show the good. - You see the goo? - Show them the good. - Put the cream to the lens. - Oh. - Oh my God. - Is it good? Give me. - Give me. - How about a mom? - Oh. - I got, they're coming in our direction. - And there's, you couldn't take a bite of that and you can take a bite of the. - That's a chocolate mold. - Mm-hmm. - Is this? - I'm Smoor. Give me some more. - This is maybe the best Smoor I've ever had. - I definitely think them. What other things can we put on sticks? - Heads. - What? - No, the cook. - Oh. - You could put this on a stick. - Mmm. - Chicken. - Me? - Good chicken kabab. - Yeah, I got kabab. - Yeah, everything's good. - You can put anything on a stick. Fruit, pizza, from Domino's with pineapple on top? - There's no stick pizza. - No one's ever had a stick pizza. - You could put the pizza on a stick if you want. You just fold it and put it on a stick. It's not that hard. - I never put it on. - No one would ever put a pizza on a stick. - Get a fire going on. - Now I'm cold. Now I'm going to get cozy. Honestly, Smoor reminds me of camping. - Oh yeah? - It does. - You big camper? - Do you like camping? - I hate camping. - Do you like the idea of it? - Do you ever go on? - Over night camp? - Oh my god, yeah. - I don't like going to like some fucking flat of land. - Would you ever be in like a tent in like the middle, sorry, I can't even think that I'm getting residual taste in the back of my throat from how delicious the Smoor was. - I just thought of a new joke. - Okay. - Why did the guy hate camping? - Why? - It was intense. - That's a good joke. - That's good. - Oh, Jigs here. - Hey, I'm here. - We do high pussies. Oh, this is serious. - Can you believe we did this? - Oh, thanks. - 'Cause we're talking about it doesn't fry. - Buckberry kills a three of us. - Oh Jesus Christ. - Jack's a laugh. - Yeah. - It's amazing. - Like perfectly. - Oh. - Oh. - Oh. - Oh. - Oh. - Oh. - Oh. - Oh. - Oh. - Oh. - My favorite. - Wow, you really hit a perfect note there. - Thanks, I felt that. - It was like pitch perfect. - I know. - You know these things. - You did not know you sang. - No, I do a little like comedy music. - He does comedy music too. - I don't take him seriously. - You got anything on the web? - Yeah, I'll send it to you after. - Okay. - Do you know about his past with Octopus? - No, I don't know anything about your past. - Would you explain your past with Octopus? - I used to review. I still do actually review Octopus. That's how I started my account. I would do like high pussies and then I would review the Octopus and then I would do it out of eight tentacles. - So did you put a lot of thought into that strategy? - No, I was smoking a lot of the time. I was bored. I was in college. - You love Octopus? - I've actually never had octopus other than. - Oh, shit. See, I messed up. - Why? - I forgot to put the dressing in before I put it. - Use this one. - Oh. - You can do it. It can happen. - Pour it all in. - No, no, no, I think you're right. And now I'm a little stressed out about it. - You want to just eat out of this one? - No, I'll do this one too. - Have you ever had Octopus? - Not in its very form like that. - What's it? - It's not form. - Just go like this. - Calamari? - No, that's squid. Come on. - It thought it was Octopus too. - But. - I had the same thought. - Really? - I actually don't know if it's form. - What? - Philly. - Eagles fan? - Yeah. - God, they're a lot. - I mean, I love I like the Eagles too, but they take it seriously. - Where are you from? - New York. - But do I actually like the Eagles or no? - I mean, I do because the people I'm surrounded by like the Eagles, and if they lose they're in the worst fucking mood all day. - Yeah, exports. - No, I like how people behave. - Are you surrounded by a lot of Philly people? - Yes. - Oh, that's fun. I love Philly people. - I love a Philly boy. - Yeah. - Clearly. - Oh, I didn't know until I met him, but. - There's a little bit of a grit. There's an optimism mixed with a pastemism as well. - You're the blue collar working. - The blue collar, boy. - I can't do. I cannot see the life on anything. I don't like bones in, and I don't like, you know, I see the. - I like to put some on bones. - No, I know, but like a chicken wing. - Yeah, check. - I don't like the tentacle. - You'll like this. - Yeah, that's a good piece. It's so good. - Tendrils. - No, it's so great. Just put it in your mouth. It's delicious. - You're picky eater, huh? - Yeah. - Isn't that delicious? - It's the tendrils. Oh, my, that's a tendril. - Tendril. - Just swallow it. Do you mean tentacles? - Yeah, tentacles. - Do you mean tentacles, Mochi? - Yeah, there's good. - Yeah, you know. - No. - Do you know immediately if you taste something, he immediately hates it. - It tastes like a mile. - That was like a dollar. - I got to say, I just, I do think that, you know, this is a tentacle, right? - Well, stop touching them. - This is a tentacle, but on the tentacle, there's more tendrils. I think I have no, I'm not sure. I've never said "tendril" in my life before. - I don't even, it's like, it's talking about like, pee, tendrils. - These are little circular things. - No, I haven't called it. - These are tendrils. - If this is called a tendril, then I'm blown away at my own feeling. - Are they called a tendril? - Where'd you go? - Are you asking God? - Green, if it's a tendril, red, if it's not. Yeah, not a tendril, you're an idiot. - A tendril, even a word. - Tendril. - I like tendrils. - Wait, so where'd you go to college? - University of Richmond. - Spiderman. - Virginia. - Yeah. - You like? - I did. - I didn't love it at first because it's very, very, like, preppy. Like, every single guy is wearing, like, purple pants and, like, a Lanier croquis, all that. - Yeah. - That's not my speed. Like, I'm like-- - What's your speed? - Just, like, this type of outfit, like, a guy who knows his way around the basketball court. But I learned, Richmond, I really did. I kind of judged a lot of this. - Look, everyone taking their shoes on. - I can't stand. - I can't stand either. - I realize that it is too. - Oh, my god, do you know how much better I feel? - I feel calm and at ease. - Oh, my god. - The top of Dave's body is always in a different mood than the bottom. - What do you mean by that? - Like, right now, like, the top of him is like, "Oh, I work in, like, finance." Or, like, it's, like, casual finance. - Where are you getting finance? - "Casual Friday." - He's hot. - From, like, a-- - We're married. - No, yeah, yes, yes. - Like, a J Cru shirt. Then it's like, "Oh, my bottoms are, like, maybe I'm at Equinox." And then, like, the shoes are like, "I'm at home." - At the University of Richmond, I judged a lot of books by their cover. I saw these men in the way that they dressed, and I thought, "Wow, you guys are fucking losers." - Uh-huh. - And then I realized, I like these people. At the end of the day, when I got past the office, I thought, "These are just normal guys, just like me." And then I found my people, and then I ended up loving University of Richmond. - People that dress like you? - No, I'm saying they dress really lame still, but I like their personality. - That's lame. - That's lame. It's an East Coast vibe. - Yeah, I find it to be like an ostentatious, pretentious way to physically carry yourself. But maybe that's me being, I'm being judgmental. - I'm being judgmental. - That's okay. - I'm admitting that I judge books by their cover. - Yeah, I think if you would say something incorrect, and you admit it right after, it's fine. - Is your face like so chiseled right now? You look very different in a very good way. - You suck the fuck up. - Are you being serious? 'Cause I woke up, that's one day I looked in the mirror, and I was like, "My face is so puffy." - No, you look like chiseled. - I think I lost weight since I lost all you. - Are you like having a lot of sex right now? - No, I haven't had sex in a while. - What about, and then was that last time great? - Yeah, it was awesome. I think it was, yeah, it was awesome. - Are you dating? - I'm dating around, yeah. - Yeah. - But it's just all the guys, good guys are in New York, I feel like. - Are you, are you like not fast sexually? Like do you, you know, so I'd like to think of myself as not, but I think I am. - Okay. - Are you at the upper bottom or verse? - What do you think, Benny? - No, you have to be verse in a time like today. - I can't be verse. - You have to. - I don't want to. - Your bottom's up, bottom's up. - Yep, I don't want to be verse. I don't want to. - Have you ever fucked the man? - No. - You haven't. - No, never. - The man. - Is that crazy? - Well, I don't even have much context for how often. - No, he didn't even, he didn't know top bottom or verse. - Do you have gay friends at all? He has like 10 gay friends. - I don't even know. - Yeah, you have like a lot of gay friends. - Yeah. - He wants to talk about being gay. - Okay. Well, how often, like, is it rare that someone who is a bottom does not at least experiment with the top? - No, I think it's rare, the my mindset. - Yes, your mindset is rare. - Like, I think I'm just. - Rare now. - Rare now. - Yes. - It didn't used to be. But like in the like, 2020 onward, it's been a whole lot. - It's just like everything's for everyone. - You're always looking down? - No. - I'm always looking for someone to, I'm looking for like a top. - But when you're, but that means that you're up. - Well you, you're just on your stomach. - Yes. - Yeah. - Well, you could do another, you could do another, you could be like this. - I guess, yeah. - Have you ever fucked like that? - No. - You've never fucked like on top of a man like this staring at him? - Like I have. (laughing) - I don't know, not with my legs spread out like that. - Well, how do you do it? You're like this. - I don't know. - I mean, you don't know. - I think I would be a bother. - Wait, are you a guy? - Yes. - I think I was, yeah. - Wait, I need to know, how are you sitting? - Like, I don't know what, yes, ask please. (laughing) - Is there a certain personality that follows the top men? - Like you know, I just would like someone that like takes care of me. - Yeah. - Like takes care of me. - It's kind of like a dominant non-dominant. - Yes, leads the way. And I feel, and I feel very, I feel very dominant in like my professional life and like my other spasits of life. So I'd like the opposite of my romantic life. - Yeah, I like that. - It's very much like that, I think. - Yeah, I wish that men and women had an easy way to just decipher sexual appetite like that. Like if you-- - You don't think you do? - No, 'cause you could, everyone's moving around and taking different, really, you can tell like what a girl's into. - Yes, usually. - You can't tell all of this. - No, but usually it's, usually I believe it's like what you're saying. If someone is like really dominant in like their professional life, they probably want to be more submissive. - Well, here's the twist. - A woman could be very like sexually aggressive, right? But in a way, where they're still being dominated. - Yes, I know what you mean, yes. - Okay, wait, Jake, you have to guess all of our sexual preferences right now. Not just like as a whole, like a dominant or submissive. Okay, go to him first. - I think you're dominant. Sometimes, I think you're submissive. - Okay, oh, you got us flip flopped. - What? - Yes. - Interesting. So you're submissive, you're dominant. - You're not submissive. - And you guys are like both submissive. - No, we're both romantic. - I don't think romantic is submissive. - Okay, it's just very, it's not like, we don't, neither one of us like like aggressive, like like we don't like that. - I think it's pretty versatile. - There's a word for you guys. - Oh, check, you guys, you're real dominant all the time. - Anyway. - And he is like a- - So I would think you would like to be spanked. - I have psoriasis. - So what is that exactly? - As I remember, you know a baboon, how they have like that purple, slimy backside. - Blue eyes out? - The baboon, the creature, like Rafiki, in the, you know, that's the right answer. - Rafiki turns his back to like the TV audience or whatever you see the purple. - Who's the Rafiki? - Rafiki of the lion's eye. - Your joke isn't landing. - It's not a joke. - He's saying- - Who Rafiki is? - He's saying that my ass looks the same as a baboon's. (laughing) Domino, snores lava cakes. - Did you guys ever camp? - Yeah. - Ever been camping? - Oh, 'cause it smokes. Yeah, I have been camping. - I have been. - I love you. - Yeah, I used to do, when college, we used to do like an annual camping canoe trip, but I would sleep in the car. I didn't do the tent thing. I was too. - You slept in the car? - Yeah, every year. The bugs and like the, it was like the stickiness of the morning. - Speaking of stickiness, there's nothing better than- - Stickin' your mouth out of this. - Domino's lava cakes. - Look at this, you guys wanna see the goo? - Look at that. - Look at that. - Oh, every time it's gooey. - You can get three. - Domino's lava cakes, when you mix and match any? - Two or more menu items. You know how I've been doing a lot of online shopping for furniture? - Yeah, I see a lot of wafer. - Yeah, I go on wafer, and then I scroll to the bottom and you can see all the reviews. - And there's like pictures and there's so many reviews, and that's how I decide if I'm gonna buy the product. - I would never buy a product that wasn't reviewed often. And wafer actually has 20 million five-star reviews. And I also have this thing called wafer verified, which is hand-vetted by product specialists with a 10 point quality inspection. Yeah, their reviews are really helpful. You never wanna go on anything blind. I'm not buying it unless someone else has put their body on the line for me. Join wafer rewards today to get 5% back on every purchase and start saving on your next home upgrade. Head to wafer.com to shop all things home. And it's w-a-y-f-a-i-r.com. - Wafer, every style, every home. - I know why they call it wafer. - Why? - 'Cause every deal they have on there is wafer. - Woof, who's your dream man? - I think my dream man is, well, I use this mm-hmm. Like someone that looks like Ashton Kutcher and works in finance. - Oh, that's finance guy. - I feel like that's so easy. - That sounds cool. - That sounds cool. - You would think so. Like I just don't want somebody that like takes away from like, like I like to, I don't know, I like to be like the funny one and-- - They can't be funny? - Well, though, I would appreciate if they're funny to me. But like, funny to everyone, no. - Really? - Only you can be funny? - Well, I don't want them to be funny to everyone 'cause everyone's gonna be laughing at them and not me. (laughing) - Well, but here's what I said to Kristen in our vows. Like I always thought, of course I'm gonna be like, the funny guy and whatever relationship I end up with, like blah, blah, blah. I really feel like, I said in our vows, I said, you know, even though I thought my whole life that I was meant to like, entertain the world, I realized like maybe my true purpose is that I get to be your audience. - Wow, that's so sweet. Do you find dating an LA hard? - It's miserable. - Yeah. - Okay, tell me about the worst date you've had in LA. - The worst date was this guy. We went on a date, it was like fine. So, okay, this is where I'm saying, we split the check. I was like, I offered a split and he was like, yeah. And he was 26 and I was like 20. And I was like, or 21 and I was like, what? - Can I just ask a quick question? - Yeah, the check splitting. - See, this is where I'm like, I want to be treated like a princess, you know? - It falls into the dominant, non-dominant relationship. - Yes, it absolutely does. - But now, because I make my own money, I'm comfortable enough like getting a check sometimes. Like, had we been on like a second or third date, but on the first one, pay for me, please. - You want that to be like the signal of like, here's how the relationship is gonna like. - Just like, I'm gonna take care of you. I'm gonna look out for you. But then like, once we get that like courtship out of the way. Like, we can, you pay for me, I'll pay for you. We'll go back and forth. - What's the best date you were last time? - It was explained the date. He was in New York, and we'd been talking for a while, and we went out to get a drink, and then we met up with two of my best friends at this restaurant in New York to get a drink, and we drank there for like three hours, and then went out and had a sleep over, and woke up, and I was like, oh my God, that was the best date of my life. - It's your best date. - You had a drink? - No, like, I mean, not it with my friends. My friends were like, my friends were like, oh, he's so great, like. - He's saying it was the best date and person and connection. - Yeah, it's, oh my God, thank you. - What do you want? - I don't know, I thought it was gonna be like, you met up with a guy, and you had a drink, and then you saw your friend. I thought it was gonna be like, like. - A crazy story. - Yeah, there was like something like, beautiful that happened, or like. - Have you been in a relationship? - No, one time I went on a date, and we got stuck in the rain, I guess, that was sweet. - That's sweet, I like that. - Well, what's your perfect man? - Early 30s. - Older. - Yeah, I think so. - 'Cause they think they're more mature, like has a career and it's like passionate about it in a sense that like, there's a path for them. - Yeah. - And they like are very focused on that. - You wanna ambition and drive? - I mean, I guess, but like, I just want them to be good at their job. And like, I like have a life. I want them to have a life. And then I want their friends to be normal as well. And then I want them to get along with my friends. And like, I'd like them to be like, five, 10 or higher, taller and then, which is difficult 'cause I'm so short, and that's about it. - I'm sitting on the couch with this. - Oh, what happened with the one with Selena? She sent me a rose, right? And then we're messaging. And so his best friend was seeing my best friend, Julia, at the time. And he said, we should go out with Julia and blank. And I was like, oh, that's kind of weird, right? Like, why are you asking me on a double date? We've never been on one date. - Yeah, yeah. I was like, you know what, whatever, whatever, whatever, whatever. We go on this double date. It's like, actually great. We get along all is good. Then he's supposed to come to Julia's going away party the following day. He doesn't come 'cause he is doing other shit. I'm like, whatever. So then he texted me, we text the next morning. And so this is, that date was on a Friday. This is now Sunday. Then Sunday, he's like, FaceTime me. FaceTime's me, showing me around his house. We're like talking for like 30 minutes. And then whatever, right? So then I like make a comment over text about like, how wanting to, 'cause he's like, I leave next week. And so I like make a comment, be like, okay, let's go on a date before then. Hair rough back. Being like, wait, no, this wasn't romantic at all. Like, I just wanted to hang out as a friend. But he sent me a rose on hinge. - But also-- - So do you see the confusing part? - We don't like that. - Yeah, fucking, what's his real name? - I'm not telling you. - Say, we'll leave it out. - But that was, that's, that was misleading. And also he's not dating it. - That's what I'm saying. - You don't wanna, yeah. - You know what that was? - What? - Your fam got involved. - Well, I know. - You think he was just trying to hang out 'cause you were famed. - Not too bad. - Not too bad. - Not too bad. - Get a grip men out there and women, and then he's, I know, well, whoever's doing this. (laughing) - I have a few questions. Okay, I have a few questions that popped into my mind. - Are they hard hitting? - I don't know. - I have a few-- - Are they thought starters? - I'm gonna forget 'em. Okay, okay, okay. I think I might have already forgotten 'em. Okay, number one, who were you most nervous to interview out of any person you've interviewed? - Probably Selena. - Really? - I was really scared. - Why? - I don't know, 'cause I've been watching hers and that was a kid, so I was like intimidated. - Really? - You kind of, didn't you kind of come up really fast, I feel like? - It did happen very fast, but yeah, it was most nervous for Selena, and I was nervous for, yeah, that was the most, I was ever nervous. - Ah! - Yeah, to be a child star, be kind of the, one of the most famous people in the world, she so isn't, like, her personality is so enormous. - It's so not. - I also thought that, Okay, okay, has anyone canceled on you day of not day of by accident, but yes I've been canceled on before many times dream top three dreams Taylor Swift Okay um Jennifer Lawrence, okay? Ariana Grande do you think you're close to getting any three of them probably not I'm you are I feel like you're really I'm just I'm just like left. Yeah. Well Taylor doesn't tell it doesn't do that So that's what I'm saying probably you're very like I here's what I'll say I didn't even I Became really into tiktok like whatever 2021 and I would and I became I would see you around Yeah, but I saw you I saw you doing I would see you with what's your your friend right? No, um, Sophia Yeah, yeah, then I feel like I just I like watched you But not even knowing that I was watching you just all of a sudden you've really done a great job of like Oh, my god, actually, I want you all the time. Thank you so much, and you're funny, and you're cool, and you're like authentic Which I think is really nice, but I get shut down really easily really anything. No, no, no, no I'm like saying like confidence isn't real like you could throw something at me and the entire house will break Okay, see I fall like you know what I mean. Like it's like a glass house like it looks like I you're sensitive But you one rock will crush the whole thing. You're like you thought you're a sensitive that's hard to be doing What you're doing would be sensitive because think yeah, do you guys find yourself to be sensitive? No, they're like you're not sensitive I don't know what we mean by sensitive. I'm sensitive. I'm sensitive. I'm sensitive. You're not sensitive Well, I can be confident and sensitive, but you just aren't sensitive This is one of the reasons that we work because sometimes I say things I don't mean or I like yap and I don't think you're that sensitive either bending. You're not sensitive I'm very sensitive as a person. I think we're defining sensitive Like personally like I'm very like like I like cry all the time. Yeah, you have feelings But like I feel very deeply, but no, no, I don't take anything personal myself self esteem is sensitive I would never yeah either one of you are that sense like you're ego or whatever. Yeah, our ego is not like that Like my ego is sensitive like like myself that like I could be working with Dave and either one of us could be like That's a terrible idea. That's so bad go start again It could be something I worked on for like a month and like I might disagree with him But if I agree with him, I'm just like oh fuck you were right like I'll the best idea always wins I don't give a fuck. I don't care if I've been working on something for a year if someone's just like this sucks that I trust Their opinion and I'm gonna like go and like I don't know I think we both have our eye on the prize in like a way that's like that. I don't care Yeah, I just want what's gonna be the best you guys are healthy. Yeah, they don't care You guys don't care what people think of you at all do you read comments? Yes, you do of course, why? Because it's there in my face. Of course, I'll read them you read when you put up a video right after you put it up You start scrolling through the comments. Yeah, but don't you get like they're probably mostly positive But there's always the one no you know, I actually went to a post the other day all negative. Oh, and you read it So you know, I just in that moment I remind myself thank God I'm Doing my job well enough to do a point where people have negative things to say you bounce back that quickly from that nowadays Yeah, but it's the negative stuff about you your opinion. Yeah, I saw on my yesterday That was like he doesn't seem genuine. Oh genuine everyone. Thank you, but I was like oh my god Am I not genuine? No, it's so yeah, so deep like it's not like oh fuck. He's ugly. Yeah. I don't know And that's like your biggest guy's like your biggest insecurity. You're like I'm genuine And I was reading it and I was like am I not? No, I can tell you're genuine. Thank you. I think I'm genuine too Wait, so you still read comments of course on every platform Yeah, I need anything I can get my hands on pretty much every comment pretty much Yeah, what if you get like thousands of comments? I don't oh if I if a video gets that then I don't But if it's like a hundred comments. Yeah, but aren't you just like numb to seeing all the like nice things now Do they even does it even make you feel good anymore? It makes me feel good when I read something that's like This made me laugh because this was this and that. Yeah, specificity. Yeah, why they like This was this was good because of this and that so people give comments and they're specifically calling out like good How lovely is that you need that's so crazy. I know Ever well, you also don't watch yourself ever Remember you told me yeah, I don't you know like I don't ever watch Anything. I've done so like when when I go on your podcast My manager watches it and then he'll tell me and then I say and then he'll say like I think we should take this thing out Because if I watch it then I'll start thinking about it or I'll start putting like I don't ever So like if I do a photo shoot for like a magazine or something and they're like hey, do you want to look at any of these? I'm like no, I don't I only want to look crazy. No, I don't want to look like pick a picture where like your bangs are split It's things are gonna happen and I'm never gonna see them again Like I don't ever see that if you're on the cover of vogue magazine You wouldn't want to know that your bangs aren't split. I've been on I've been on the cover of a magazine And I didn't even see what photo they picked sometimes I don't let you say yeah And for but for me it's like this. It's like there's times that I'll let you see yeah, there's gonna be so many Things in your life that are out of your control like that and it just like doesn't matter It's just like a numbers game to me and I'm like we're all gonna die and I'm like okay if I look bad It doesn't help me. No, it helps me so much. That doesn't help me really we're all gonna die doesn't help me because I'm alive now No, but it helps you to me. It just like reminds me how in significant we are I can't pick up on it because I'm alive and conscious right now. So it matters I think what I struggle with is that my career is based on what people think of me Yeah, so if people don't like me then I'm doing a bad job at my work Yeah, but you're just not totally genuine. That's just like no, but my every genuine. That's just the one He's not like an in-genuine thing today. Is there any other comment that hit you deep recently? Yeah, I don't know he seems like a bad person Because they stick with you he seems like a bad person in genuine. I think somebody called me like Like like oh my god. What was it? It was so clever. It was like twink demon LaBouboo or something But like that's funny to me. So like I don't know that stuff bothers me like the you seem like a bad person Yeah, that's where I'm like oh my god am I but you know you're not so then it's just like not all the time So I'm like oh my god am I no he seems like he seems like he seems like chopped. It's nice that people even are wondering what you seem like Are you finding yourself like really like thinking as you're doing your? Now I am yeah, I used to just let it rip. Yeah, that's too bad. I know I know how you get back. I don't know because the generation like you're like the gent gent the younger Gen Z is just brutal Can I say something about Airbnb real quick? Oh, yeah, Chris And I know that you've been mentioning that you wanted to have some sort of commemorative party with all the guests And I haven't ever believed in that concept Until now because I just found this full Western town. Would you show the show the community? This is the viewership. I mean, this is a Western town. I would love to do this This is this is like you walk around like you know you turn this corner You got like Griffin dribbling you turn that corner. You got Sean O'Malley shadow boxing and it all has to be Western Like maybe everybody wears Western themed clothes. Yeah, it's a kind of an ask because it's not that close to LA And then we're talking to the dress up, but either way book a home today on the Airbnb platform Hey, don't worry. You're still in the right place. We're just starting this moment from here Because you never know what to expect but one thing that is going to be important no matter what is that you show up for your friends Which makes me think of the time that Benny showed up for me when he ordered me Hello, geez, big. Thank you door dash. We got crackers. Is that the one you like? It's the one that I think I'm going to like. Oh my god. This is what I wanted. Oh my god. She's taking all kinds Mm-hmm There was a guy who would be door dash. I love you door dash. We respect you. We respect you Door dash makes showing up for the people you love easy got you delivered door dash order now Is he out there? Okay. Okay. Before we go outside with Jake I bought a bunch of stuff off Amazon that reminds me of college. You were just ordering stuff You this is actually good for you Dave. What is that a pot? I mean think about it ramen me. Would you you were in a dorm, right? I wasn't a dormant. If only I knew that you could make your own ramen in house And not have to walk to the dining hall it would change everything for me. I love ramen. I would have eaten it every day No, that's mine. Yeah, you might want to tap into your college age self-too. Look as oh, that's nice It's a computer table. Yeah. Oh, yeah, for your ergonomics. I've never used one in college. They're great for college You can put your computer right here, and then you can sit in bed, and it just is right over you. Oh my god Look what I have here. Oh, wow 76er speaker. I couldn't imagine being in college. I mean, obviously it was pre-king Yeah, things are different now now that the kings arrived post-king when we just say Now that we're talking about the sixers the bride Thank you Seriously, it means everything check. How'd you get all this stuff so quick? Amazon has like an office college section that you can order from and looks like you're not too old To enjoy the section I wish I had this stuff when I I didn't even go to college. I wish I went to college Do you wish you went to college? So I could have some of this stuff you can have it now that I could order if I was going off to college Amazon doesn't check your idea when you make these orders. Are you telling me I could order off to college? Amazon purchases myself even while sitting in my home is a 38-year-old man. I feel as though you can all right from sitting out there for a while, let's all go. - Sorry, Jake, we're coming, baby. - So nice outside. Are we okay to be outside? - There's a gosh darn right we are. - Shh. - Oh! - Oh! - It burnt my, oh, your foot. It's okay. (laughing) - Can I have another one? - It went out. - Chuck, were you lighted on fire and I tried to throw it in your mouth? - Definitely not. - What's your idea of a perfect night out? - Oh, my God. - Okay. - Or just a perfect night out. - No, no, no, perfect night out. - I'm pretty similar. - I can answer that. - I don't know if they're similar, let's see. - I have dinner at like four p.m., right? - I love dinner early. - Just like postmates, postmates 'cause we're all going out for the night. - Oh, oh. - Yeah, it's like we'll have a very big party that we need. - That's fine. - Okay, what's your postmates order? - Like before going out, like maybe like some, just pasta, some easy pasta to eat and just like coat my stomach with bread. - Do you know what Dave calls what you're doing? He calls it laying a base. - Yeah. - And he does it every time before he's gonna get when he was single and we used to like drink a lot and go out like he used to, check. You know what he's describing in his perfect night out? - What's up? - Check, he's describing the beginning of your perfect night out. He's talking about laying the base. - Oh yeah. - Yeah. - So, but it's four p.m., and everybody is invited too, and we are all going to a party tonight. Not only are we going to a party, but it's not, we're not hosting it. A close acquaintance/friend is. So we're very comfortable going to this party. - Okay. - And then we all meet in the kitchen and like, but not only is it just us at the pregame, like it's a bunch of our friends that are also all invited to the same party. And then we're all hanging out in the pregame, we're listening to music, playing whatever music we want because there aren't like boys there that want like, you know what I mean? - Yeah, girl, like you're- - We're playing Taylor Swift. - Yeah. - We're playing like old, we're playing good music. - Yeah. - And then we're all like drinking, drinking, we're like slowly getting drunk. We're making like emotional toast where we're just like, we really love each other. - That is fun. - We really, we really just love each other. I love you guys. Like, you know, love you, love you, but like mean it. And then like, we're like, oh shit, we have to go soon. The party started, it looks like everybody and our other social groups that are all along. - Are you looking for online to see stories? - Like a little, we're seeing people. - I'm really like throwing a lot. - I'm having fun. - And then we're taking videos, like TikTok, or taking photos. We are having the best time. Like, and we are like getting down at this pregame. Like dancing, like really? To the point where I have to freshen up after 'cause like we're sweating. I have like a possible romantic interest at the party. - Of course. - But it's not even like where I'm not like, that's out of reach. I'm like, we've met before and like we've vived. So then we go to this party and it's great. The car ride there is great. I just, we killed us for a little second 'cause like the car rides a little long so we're like, who? - Even so then you're in your best night. - And you're like, you're singing in the car. But then like, at one point, someone's like, are we almost there? - No, yeah. That moment is the worst. So in my dream scenario, that moment doesn't happen. - Oh my god. - Yeah. - No, but you know when that happens. It's like in the vat and you're just like, are we like, and then you kind of stop. - And the mood is like that. - So again. And then like, right when it gets real like, yeah. - Yeah. - And then people are like yawning. And you can tell that everyone is kind of like - No, no, no. - I'm out of it. - But there's the perfect party. - Yeah. - So then we got that. - Well, hey, hey, hey, hey. - No, hi, either. - We, everyone we know is there. People that we don't know are there. Like, like, we're having a great time. Then I see the guy, like, and then my night can end one of two ways. One, with the guy or two, like, back at my house and we smoke a joint and we order food. And then, or, sorry, we smoke a joint and go to bed and then wake up. And the first thing we say to each other, first thing. - So happy we didn't order food. - So happy we didn't drunk you last night. - Yeah. - So happy we didn't drunk you last night because it just sets your Sunday up for six sets. You're like, and you know what? Now I can eat whatever the fuck I want. - Yeah. - But drunk eating is so unbelievable. - Yeah. - It's so fun, but you wake up and you're just like, you guys go, do you guys gossip the next morning? - Too we, yeah, of course. But the best is when we gossip about each other, to each other's faces. And like, oh my God, you were so stupid. Like, this was, like, you know, and then. - Wow. - These are not, yeah, that's my dream night. - That's my dream night. - Are your best friends, guys? Girls? - Girls. - I have a few guy best friends, though. And they're gay. - Kinda. - My favorite thing is, like, my friend, some of my friends will be like, they'll be like, oh, like, we have a gay friend and you have a gay friend. Like, just like, just like, two gay people have to automatically like each other. - But then, like, it's just weird. I don't know. - Every time you interact with another gay man, you've, in that sense, you go. - No, no, no, no, it's just like, if I'm going, I don't know, if I'm going to a party and let's say there's a gay person there, like, that my other friends are bringing. And like, I think he's hot. Like, I immediately feel like, oh, that would be nice at that happen. And then when it doesn't, - Yeah, yeah. - And then when it doesn't, it's not like I can look to four more gay people. - Yeah. - But you wanna know what would make the night actually fucking perfect? - Yeah, what? - I don't go home with a guy, I go home with my friends, I smoke, we go to bed, and then right before I go to bed, he taxed me like, so much fun tonight, let's go for a drink. - Why are you gonna say so much fun tonight? Come over. - No, no, no, no, no, I'm too much. - I said, I smoked, it's done. - What's an average weekend then? - Well, do you wanna hear what I did this weekend? - Yeah. - I learned my lines for an audition I had today and I went to bed. - You didn't audition today? - Yeah. - Before this? - Right before this. - I was on the self-tape. - You know, I didn't think it went too well, but I'm okay with that, I'm happy that I did it, and I'm putting myself out there. - And then you came here and it didn't, that would have been hard for me, I think I wouldn't have been able to do an audition, and then-- - Well, I was really upset, but then I talked to Louise, who was my manager, and she's very good at helping me be like, this is what you're upset about, or just like helping me, I'm lately, I've been making an active effort to compartmentalize like my stuff, so like I was coming here, I can't be upset about that, I have to put it away for now. - Yeah. - And I've been really making an active effort to do that. I literally in my head, I think about Tupperware, and I like think about putting the thought in it, and closing it. - Yeah, I've heard, I've heard of that being like, - And that's what I've been doing. - Can I open just the Tupperware? - Yeah. Just in this particular instance, this was a self-tape, right? - Yeah. - Was it due today? - Yeah. - Okay. - And I did it Friday, and I was like, fuck, I'm doing a really bad job at this, and I was kind of dreading having to do it today. - Yeah. - And I'm just happy it's over. - Why do you? - I can't say I didn't do it, I can't say I didn't do it, 'cause I was scared I'd be bad. - Yeah. - Why do you even feel like it went bad? - I just, it's just how I feel. - Yeah. - I just felt it. But I'm looking on the bread side of things, and there's things I learned this time, or like certain kinks I got out of the way, this time, next time, I'll be better. - Should we go inside? - Sure. - That would be a lot for me to have an audition, and then have to be on a podcast? - Yeah, but this doesn't even feel like a podcast. Like I'm really like-- - I forget what it is. - Right, podcast. - Oh, are you, are you, do you have like OCD? - It's the worst. - And how does it manifest itself? - Like if I posted something, and like fucked up the caption when I posted, the easy thing would be like, just press edit and edit the caption. But my OCD would be like, come up with a whole new caption, delete it, and redo it with a whole new caption that will take you 10 minutes to think of. - Yeah. - Just very difficult, or you'll have horrible luck and everything will fail, and you'll die. - Do you have any rituals? - Yes, but I've gotten better with them, but like, stuff in the shower, like I have to move a certain way before turning it off. - Tell me what you have to do in the shower. I'd like to see. - Like I have to like, turn around. - Show me what you have to do. - Show us the moves so like, the shower will be on. I'll be like, okay, I'm done now. So we'll turn around this way, then turn around this way, and turn it off. Because if I don't do that, - I'm on the phone all day. - And my friends will hate me, and I'll lose my career. - Can you tell me another thing you do? - Every time before I shower, I have to bring like my underwear into a very specific spot in the bathroom, so then right when I get out, and I can't touch, so like right now I don't have a mirror. You know how I have like a shower mirror to shave? Sometimes I don't, well right now I don't, 'cause I lose room, so I know the rooms, and so I stick my phone there, and shave, and so I cannot touch or use my phone until I put my underwear on. And then. - So you're still doing these, you're still keeping up with that? - Yes, yes, it's not as bad. - Are you creating new ones still? Sometimes, like this phone one is recent, and I can't wash, I love to wash my face in the shower, and I can't wash my face in the shower. If I don't have a mirror, like a phone, or a mirror to look at myself into, I can't just blindly wash it. - Oh wow, so what's a recent one? - But you don't always have that building. - So then yeah, it's horrible, I'm telling you. - How do you do? - I stick my phone up, and I do know the craziest thing. Do you know? So I wash my face in the shower, and I wash my face out of the shower. There's two times I wash it a day, but I can't keep the face wash out of the shower, I have to keep it in the shower, and I have to walk in, grab it, squirt it, walk back out, and I can't buy another one, and I have other ones. Actually, so I could leave one right there, but I'm not allowed to. - You can't squeeze it outside of the shower. - No, I have to squeeze it in the shower. - And now I have to see it. - I have all these new ones with my wedding ring that are so annoying. - Oh, what? - Oh my God. So I have to, when I get in the shower, it's insane. I know that I'm gonna have to take my wedding ring off because the little loose, I have to get it tightened. So I'm hoping after it, but I have a feeling it's still gonna stay even after it's tightened. But I have this thing where I have to start the soaping process, feel it getting loose. Even though I know it's loose, it's loose enough to take it seriously by now. - And then I have to sit down, I have to sit down, 'cause there's like a ledge that I put on. I have to sit down, put it on the ledge, and I have to sit, I can do it standing up easily, but I have to sit down, put it on the ledge, and then I have to, I say a thing to myself. I don't wanna say it all, I gotta say a thing to myself. - Why am I able to say what you say? - I say, now I honestly don't wanna hear, I'm scared I'll do that. - It's fine. - It's fine. - I say, I say, don't forget the ring, don't forget the ring, don't forget the ring. And I say it's three times and what? - That's crazy. - And then, but I don't say it out loud. - Now I get it. - Oh, I get it! - And then I do that too. - No, and then it's pretty freaky. - When I get out of the shower, I take it, and I put it back on, and then I do my whole routine out of the shower, but I have to take it off for my routine out of the shower, but I know, I put like this baby oil on me, and I know it's gonna be slippery, but I have to keep it on during that, and then I take it off, and then I do the whole thing, and then afterwards I put my ring back on, knowing that it's still gonna be a little slippery, then I take it off again, wipe it with a towel, and then put it back on, and then wipe it again with the towel, and I have so many. - This is it, this is a time-soft. - So do you ever, but it's still quick? - So doesn't it make you want to do things less because I know, so that's what it makes me lazy, 'cause I'm like, oh, I know how much, I'm gonna have to go through to do this task, I'd rather just lay in bed. - Yeah, that's what I used to have it so bad that when I was a kid, I'm like brushing my teeth, too. - Oh my god, I have to go brush, and then I go on my gums, one, two, three, four, and I have to spit four times, and none of this spit can touch each other, like I can't, and then I wash it all down. - Do you think that it trickles into like you can't, can you not do anything like half-ass in life? Like do you feel like it makes you really like a perfectionist? - I think in some sense is yeah, like I was really struggling earlier today with my audition. - Yeah. - Like if I messed up one word, and he was like, no, like that's how like human language works, like you don't need to. - Right, but you're such a person of like, what, it throws me, I mean really? - I'll see things in my head, like if I don't do like something, like I'll be like, oh, I'm not gonna do, like I'll go like this, sometimes I'll be like, oh, I'm just not gonna do that. And then like, I start like seeing it over and over again, over and over again, and I can't, it's like a, it's like, and then I'm just like, I find it. - Our closet is very much like, I feel like, his closet is like pristine, it looks like the nicest, like the nicest luxury story you could go to, and I walked in, yesterday he was like, don't, it's like, it's messed, like I wouldn't do it this way. Like it's messy right now, and it was like perfectly folded, like space between each hanger, and I said, what would you do different? Like what's different? He said, well, there would have been something filling this space right here. I have to, when Selena, she doesn't know this, but we had people coming over and they were gonna hang. And I said, oh, where do you think we're gonna be hanging out? And she wasn't thinking at all, so she just told me. And I was thinking that because I'm like, I have to clean those areas where they're gonna hang. Like she was like, oh, we're gonna hang out in like the glam room, and then like we might, I might have, and like, she's just saying it passively, and then I go, and I don't wanna make a big deal of it. So like, I won't tell her, but I'll like walk in the glam room and I'll be talking to her and I'll slowly be picking up all the things and moving in. But I don't wanna tell her like, cleaning it, at all. And sometimes she'll be like, what are you doing? And I'm like, oh, do you take Adderall? I take it like, no. Have you ever taken it to try to mitigate the bad ADD from? Yeah, like I had to write like an eight page thing the other day, and so I took it not at all. Would you have to write eight pages? Like, like, interviewed my friend for a magazine, so I like had to write the-- I've taken Adderall since I was 13, but it sometimes helps me with my obsessive thoughts. Are you taking it right now? I take it every day since I was 13. Have I ever met you not on it? Probably not. I take Adderall, I don't have that much ADD, but I have a little bit, right? I don't know how to quantify it, but I started taking it in high school, and I do think that it really does help me, I'd rather live life on Adderall, and it helps me like, you know, I don't really feel the ADD now much. So my issue with Adderall is the calm down for me. It's really, really, really hard. It's like I, like, just get so in my head. Have you tried taking different milligrams? No, because I'm so hyper. I know I can just-- I know it's not gonna work for me. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know it's not gonna work for me. I don't like the way I feel after her. Like I'll like it to like-- If I remove that bottle from the-- Oh, I'm so sorry. Was it being loud? Just the way that the crackling, I just seem like I'm fast-forwarding to the edit, and I'm just seeing, why didn't I just say stop cracking it? Stop doing that, I'm so happy you said it, 'cause I would have had really bad scaries had I realized it was a problem after. Every time I leave, every time I leave any social-- I wonder if you guys, I've never asked the two of you if you have this, but I feel like you have this. Well, were you like, was that okay? Every-- it's like it's like my brain and like a high-pitched voice going through, like every single thing that was said, every single movement I did. Oh, shit. I just-- I've never heard that sound. I know, it was-- I think it was a huge brain. Oh, it was a brain. I've never heard that sound. That was really funny. In my life, guys. Yeah, that was awesome. That was a good-- That was awesome. Wait, you've-- It's a really incredible comedic timing. He does. He does. Like, it is-- you have the gift. He does. His father will get you nowhere. Wait, so my parents actually used to say, "Flaud, where he gets you everywhere." Really? Yeah, do you not believe that? My hands are-- or-- Do you sweaty pumps and drink? I think so, yeah. You can both hocks in your hands. See, it's-- Well, then I've got sweaty. Let me see this one. This one's sweaty. No, it's not bad. I felt sweaty here. It's pretty sweaty, but not too bad. What color would you say your hair is? Okay, so it's such a good question. I think it's brown. But a lot of people would like to say it's dirty blonde. And I think they're ridiculous. But people really stand by. That looks great. No, I think it's dirty blonde. Do you actually think it's bright? I'd have to say, if I could only pick one word, like one color, I would say red. Fuck you. Because there's a group of people that believe that too. It's not red. It's between red and brown. But it looks almost like, it's like, it's like, what? You guys are seeing things. No, no, no, it's like cool. It's like charcoal. Yeah, it's like, OK. I don't think-- wait, it's just dirty blonde. It's like the color of your hoodie. Like, it's lightest. So, yes. No, it's lightest. It's a lighter version. To me, it's like a mixture of this. It's both your pants and your hoodie combined. So should I die? No, it looks cool. It looks like it's already died. Can I see-- can you take a photo of it? I want to see it. Or show me like a mirror. Can you carry your phone? I don't want to take a photo. It's got a sheen. It looks healthy. It is healthy. It does look like both of-- I see what you guys are talking about. It does look right. No, that's a good picture of you. Do I actually don't hate it? Do you like the picture? I like how my face looks. Yeah. It's so chiseled right now. Your jaw almost looks like when you put that filter on. Oh, my god, do you mean it? I swear, doesn't it? Hey, you said it multiple times. So I do believe in you. Yeah. I do like you. I do like you. Really? Yeah. Well, you just spit on me. So maybe a little lesser done that. Can I talk to you about eBay Live? I would love if you talk to me about eBay Live. eBay Live. It's got the capability to start. I mean, this is-- look, let them stay. This is live. That's cool. Just happening in front of everybody. I feel like this is where eBay belongs. Like, they've been-- this is eBay. It's good that they're continuing to add on. Add on to this. Add on. Keep building. Keep growing. Keep changing. Keep changing. Keep evolving. Keep having fun. A little bit of it on some? Yeah. I would love that. What do you want? A sports card. Something. Something rookie. Yeah, I need some rookie right now for eBay Live. Baseball? Yeah. What do you want? Oh, honey. Oh. [LAUGHTER] Did you say oh, honey? Isn't it oh, honey? Oh, you're talking much. Oh, I thought you could say to me oh, honey, like-- No, I was-- Oh, honey. [LAUGHTER] eBay Live is live. Interactive shopping on the eBay app. Watch live, shop live. This episode responds to your bite better health. Shop, how is your definition of taking care of yourself changed or evolved over time? When I was younger, I couldn't see things-- For the macro web. I had to see them right in front of me. And it can be so overwhelming trying to conquer all these things, like right next to you, without being able to pull out and see the broader scope in the full sports tree. Yeah, to see the forest through the trees. And I think therapy really helped me not only do that, but gave me the tools that when I am stuck down on that ground floor, I can really like reach into my bag of tools through CBT and help get me to a better place. I love those. The time is always right to start taking care of yourself. Sign up and get 10% off at betterhelp.com/fks. That's [email protected]/fks. What's the most vain thing you've ever done to your entire life? I feel like it's-- what does vain mean? Yeah, I can tell you not very genuine. Oh, no, just kidding. vain means overly concerned with your physical appearance and did something that's-- I used to bring-- I used to sneak a little thing of makeup into my pocket in high school, and I used to take Q-tips and take my mom's makeup and load up with enough to last for all the pimples that I might have. And I'd go to the bathroom with a little task, and I would dab the thing. And then I'd go back in there and it was like a whole ordeal that I never even-- I don't think I've told anyone that. I didn't-- you never said that. Yeah. So one time I put sun in in my hair? No, you like lasering your pubes is like a vein. Yeah, I guess laser. That's not vain. I don't know, it makes me comfortable. My dick has hair all the way up. It sucks. Yeah, it has hair up to the actual end. My dick would grow a fucking full beard all around the shed to the head, so that the fight would shave my shed. Yeah, because his dick's made of nuts. Yeah, my dick's fucked up. Do you not know his dick was made of nuts? Like your skin. Among other things that your balls are. Yeah. That's what his penis is made of. In parts. Your life. I've had surgeries on my dick as a baby. to be so sexually insecure for my whole life, yeah. - Are you sexually insecure? - It's beyond. - Why? - I just am happy. - I just am, like I haven't had it, like I don't know. - You just need someone to make you feel comfy. - No. - Really? Maybe I think that is what I need now? - Yeah. - No, that is what you need. - Oh. - But that won't, that won't. - That won't say that. - What do you mean saved you? - Yeah. - Oh me, I saved you. - I don't feel sexually insecure when we hook up and all. I feel very confident and good. - You've always kind of been confident sexually in my experience with you. - Hey. - Hey. - Hey. - Hey. - I was gonna say something, but it's so stupid. - Say it. - I was gonna say, what's your rose and your thorn? - Of this hangout? - Or like, yeah, of this hangout. - Yeah, of this hangout. Fuck Mary Kill of the three of us. - Oh, I like both of this. - I don't wanna play that game. - No, you have to. - 'Cause because you want to do-- - Yeah, I just don't want to play that game. - Nope, sorry, I don't want to play that game. - It's inappropriate to say you have to say, like, who you'd fuck in front of me? - It's weird. - Oh yeah, I'm sorry, that's my bad. - So I'm gonna do rose and thorn. - I got it. - And bud, bud is what you're looking forward to, but everybody has to do it in here. - Bud? - Bud? - Bud is like budding. - You don't understand, sorry. - So my thorn, I'll start off bad. My thorn is, when I went to go pee, right before I went pee, I was like, I didn't say anything stupid. And then my rose was, you every single time you tell me, I lost weight. It's a feeling, unlike anything I've ever experienced. And then my bud, my bud is, I am really excited to, go to dinner tonight. - Okay, what's your rose thorn in bud? - Thorn is the, just my thoughts the entire time. - I got it, I got it. - I'm gonna, ugh, I got it. - I got it. - My rose is right now. - Oh, I'm, I'm like, why? I don't know, I just feel happy right now. - Oh, okay, good, good, good. - I thought it was, 'cause it was end in. - Oh, what's your budget? - No, maybe, no, not really. And then my, I don't, my bud, oh dinner, I'm hungry, I'm hungry. - What do you gonna have? - I don't know, I was just gonna, - I mean, Japanese curry. - Whoa! - If I could have some of that, that would be my bud. - Great, your turn. I think my rose, well, it's too macro of a rose, but I really, I really didn't know you and I was just, I feel really enjoying hanging out with you. So on a global level, my rose is just meeting someone cool and fun that I like. - You know, I feel that same way with you as well. - My thorn? - Uh-huh, okay. - That's when you were gripping the bottle. - Okay, that's fine. And you know what, it was pissing me off. - I feel like I stressed something. - It didn't even piss me off. If we weren't, you know, trying to capture the content, I wouldn't care at all. - Right, right. - No, but it was a problem and it's-- - And that's it. We're done. - Well, he has to give this. (laughing) - My rose was eating the octopus. - It was good. - Well, it actually might be my thorn. - It was my rose. - Unfortunately, it's here. - I don't know, I got it. - It's here. - No, you know what my true rose was. I was a little bit too high right before we started this and Dave saved me with fizzy cola, stale things. - That would be my thorn. - It looks like Dave's making a brand new thorn right now. - He lost his phone. - You don't need your phone in this very moment. - I would say I got too high because it's a new weed. I've never smoked this weed before. - Yeah, weed was the type I did your last. - I didn't like this weed. - I didn't like hairs. You're with the two people that text you. - No, I know, but I was gonna look up something that was kind of a full circle thing. - In the bud, and my bud, my bud is actually taking our relationship a little bit further. - Do you know that I was mapped onto my bud as well? I really think I'm excited to like actually become friends. - I can't tell if you're being genuine. - No, I am f*cked. - Or if you're just like not an actual genuine person. - But I am excited to become friends. - Me too. - Like actual friends. - 'Cause then why are you laughing? - Because I'm just laughing. - Tendrils. - Tendrils doesn't mean what I thought it meant. - Oh. - It's like a plan. - No, octopi do not have tendrils. - Tentacles. - Yeah, that might be what I was confused about. - Well, they don't have tentacles. - Oh gosh, that was a great podcast. - And we're done. - That was so fun. - I didn't know they didn't have fun at all. - That was great, yeah. - Thanks for having me. - You're a pro. (upbeat music) - This episode is brought to you by Dominoves. (laughing)