The Fears Episode

what's your greatest fear mine's sitting right here it's me on the mic and my friend and my girl and i gotta be right diarrhea diarrhea is not what i was hoping you'd say don't be fearless because you write tears miss don't be fearless have no fear because this episode will take it we'll take it all on you know i almost stabbed my friend to death one time no i didn't know that how did that happen that sounds crazy i'll tell you i'll tell you i was sleeping and it was like i heard a noise and i was like what the fuck and i wake up i like sneak out and i'm like walking around everywhere and i keep hearing noises and i'm like holy fuck i'm like okay i gotta go to the kitchen and get a knife like i have to get a knife oh my knife is so personal well i was like i have no i have nothing else to do what else am i gonna grab i have nothing you have no gun no check i don't have a gun i don't i don't even know how to use a gun i'd like shoot myself by mistake yeah how do you know where the knives were you just opened every drawer it's like i'm in a kitchen there's only so many what are you talking about there was like a butcher block no there's like a butcher block and i and i and i went and i and i grab it okay and then i walk like behind a thing and i'm like sitting here and then i hear something in the kitchen and it's like and i'm like is that person grabbing a knife and i'm like holy shit and i'm like and i like start getting like low to the ground because i'm like if i can like stab up and i like and i like stab up i like sneak around and then as i'm sneaking around okay i'm sneaking this way my friend is thinking the same thing okay and he's he had grabbed a knife and we're both turning a corner and it's just a coin flip whether i go like right there for some reason i don't do it and we go ah and we see each other and we did not stab each other you think if you encountered an intruder you would you would just stab him yeah yeah what do you mean i have no if i saw a man i didn't know in my home i just would oh no see i wouldn't do that what would you do i would be like i have a knife oh you wouldn't you say i have a knife he'd be like okay cool or he'd be like yeah like what do you say i have a knife a girl in my high school which is like a we went to a very you know normal suburban town she was just in her childhood room with like very normal room with like you know the window unit air conditioners yeah all of a sudden she woke up in the middle of an of the night and a man was just crawling through her air conditioner and she was like oh my god i have a knife i have a knife i have a knife like the window area no yeah she had to get out of bed she had to kick the man out of the room call 9-1-1 it was like they never found the guy he ran away it was just such a one-off crazy thing to happen in a suburban town like that well that's sometimes crime happens in the least expected place i think i would i think i would i think i would go like this that's true i think i would say like i think i'd be like i'll if i if i was face to face with a robber and i had nothing and i'd be like i'd be like i'll give you anything you want like i like we can go to the bank right we can go to the bank right now we can do whatever you want or i'd be like i'd i'd resort to i would you would suck their dick yeah i would a hundred percent are you kidding me what if they don't want to get their dick sucked yeah if it was an option if they said yeah if the guy was like hey man suck my dick and i won't kill you i i i would i would but why do you think like any guy that breaks into your home wants you i don't know if he wants you to suck his dick i'm saying just if he said if he was like hey suck my dick or i'll kill you i'd be like i don't i hate this topic and and i feel like your your biggest fear is flying on airplanes yeah that's definitely number one like you you literally have to take ships first of all i prefer the bus over i prefer the bus over flying yeah like even like even if i love selena's in new york you have to it takes you three days to get to her i really really really really don't like to fly 2020 or 2021 we were on facetime with you i remember this you got off the plane yeah with your little roller suitcase yeah i was i was i was playing snl uh it was our first so this was like we were the second act back it was me and justin bieber and we were playing uh lonely on snl and they had a a private jet to take them back and i i was planning this is so out of character like me like them just springing a thing on me being like because i was just planning on taking my normal bus back home and they were like we got a jet man just like on the jet and i was like yeah okay and i was like yeah maybe i will because it was like all happening so quickly so i go to the airport i have the bus drop me off and i get on the plane and everyone's like oh man you did it and like everyone's on the plane and i'm sitting there and they're like about to take off and i'm like nah and just get off fully got off one time i can i tell you a small business plan that i never saw through that is such a good idea yeah i have a great imagine a small business that is a company where you book a you you have to go to thailand or wherever you want to take a trip they come to your house they inject you you wake up you're in thailand yeah your suitcase is unpacked and they just they know how to medically induce you into i guess your kidneys no i mean i guess it's not i didn't really ever do any no i want it i want to get on the airplane and you look out the window it's not just a screen no i wanted to be put on we're not we're all just circling around and going right back where we started one of the last times i took a plane somehow someone convinced me to hitch a ride from la to coachella and i'm on the plane with a bunch of people and i'm sitting next to harry styles okay that must have been crazy go on i'm on the plane i'm sitting next to harry styles and he's a friend of mine he's a really sweet guy that's crazy did you sign an nda to be his friend no i did i didn't sign an nda to be his friend um but he's a very sweet sweet guy and i'm sitting next to him we're in the air and it starts to get a little turbulent and the first thing he does is he looks at me and he goes oh no man he goes i think this is the one i think we're going down really yeah that's the first thing he said to me you have a fear of flying no he was joking and i was messing with you and i go really and i got so scared and it was like we were in the air and i was like and he was like oh no it made me so scared but he also did it in a way where it made me laugh but i was secretly petrified and that flight's like 18 minutes long i was petrified have you ever as someone who's scared of flying youtubed like bad turbulence videos yeah i look at it every day like i looked at it two days people with their iphones are like yep it's my favorite they're like smacking against like the ceiling and like flying down i saw a tiktok about help you if you had trouble with flying and it said like if you just imagine a plane in jello that's like what the pressure coming up and the pressure coming down creates so you're not really just gonna like drop out of the sky i know all the things yeah but all it takes is a bird to go into the propeller even a bird it takes it could really just be like a number of things yeah the whole thing man what about a man who's just like a high shaker no just the the pilot's just like you know what fuck this shit well you guys you could do anything yeah i don't like i when you're in like a car even though it's way more dangerous than a flight you feel like you can you can turn you have a second yeah you can no second no no i think about this all the time driving is one of the most yes yeah social activities we could do as a species we're all just like trusting trusting one another on the road there's the only thing that's between us and death is like a painted white line i know but if you're in a plane you're like this you're like like you're just yeah it's so long you're it's so long i have one recurring nightmare and it is i'm sitting on a plane it's like a peaceful flight you hear the hum of the thing like four rows ahead of me a man just looks out the window and goes no no no and then another plane smacks into the plane i'm on takes off the front half of the plane and it's like going like this it's like on fire and it's like this and then it's like going down and i wake up you don't care that's rough check that's crazy and you fly flying oh shit my sandwich oh fuck check is it okay no it's perfect it's a little what do you mean it's perfect maybe i really forgot about it let's see chuck it's literally oh it is perfect it is perfect it's crisp so okay oops fuck fuck do you guys know about new mccafe's brightberry blast do you well now you do that's foam i mean even the way this is delectable i love it you love it you want to talk about it she gets excited tanya the days that we have to do the mcdonald's mccafe drinks you get excited about guys more than excited and I live for it. - I gotta say something. This thing's like a reset. It's like a reward. It's like a way to get through the day. I mean, really, it's a reason to hang with friends. - It's also more than just a drink. It's special. It really is special. - Try all the new McCafe drinks. Yeah, let me tell. They've done it again. You know what I'd like to do? - What? - I'd like to settle the sauce argument that we had with a credible source, Yahoo Scout. Do most people make their own sauce, Yahoo Scout? - First sentence. Most people rely on packaged products. Nearly nine in 10 people use store-bought sauces or marinades. - Now, Chuck, I'd like you to read the second sentence. - However, homemade sauce usage stands at six in 10 people. - Thank you, Yahoo Scout. Majority rules. - Meaning both methods coexist among American households with packaged sauces-- - Chuck, I don't wanna hear it. I don't wanna hear it. - Scout.com, you mother-- - Scout.com. - We trust you. - Sorry. - Sorry about that. - Hey guys, you know, on our podcast-- - Not a bunch of vignette. - Vignette. - On our vignette segment, you just really feel like you're like fly on the wall in the experience of like hanging out. - You broke the concept by speaking to him. I'm just kidding. I spoke to him earlier. - All right, cut it, cut it. - No, don't cut it, don't cut it. - Cut it. - It's, it switches medium. - Chuck, how many of these do you think, I could shove in my mouth right now? How many? - I would, I would love to find, I mean-- - How many? - I bet you can do 15. - How many? Both take backs right now. - No, wait, no, 30. - Wait, 30? - In your mouth at once? - Yeah, once. - You're not swallowing? - I won't swallow, just shove. - I think you could, I love this, and you're doing it. - Yeah. - I think that you could do, I think you can put like nine in your mouth at once. - Okay, and what's your guess? - Do you have any idea what the answer is? - I have no idea. I've never done this before. Maybe when I was a kid. - Yeah, okay. Well. - My mouth has grown. - Sure. - How many do you think I can do? - Fuck, I fucked it all up. - Or do you wanna do your mouth too? And we'll see who can do the most. - I have a huge mouth. - Okay, let's see who can, who do you think can do more? - I think she could do more. - Okay, okay, and you guess nine for me, and how many for her? - Like 11. - Okay, okay, okay. She goes one. - Wanna do it? - One, no. - Hold on. - What? - No. - Let me just make my s'more before-- - Two, I'm watching. Two, her mouth's already full. - Yeah, now we, now I-- - Three, four, five, six is the best thing I've ever come up with. Six, are you-- - You're just, you're just getting started. Don't make her laugh. We can't make her laugh. It's like dangerous to make her laugh. You're just getting started. That can be squished like foam. Don't look at us. - Seven, are you-- - Do you wanna stop? - Are you choking? - No, she's all right. Keep going. - Seven, that's it. Okay, seven. So I think I'm just gonna put seven all in at once. - What do I do with it? - Smart. - No, I'm not gonna-- - I was drooling. - Okay, so she did seven. So Chuck, I'm just gonna go for a quick eight, okay? - You gotta be careful. You guys are making me laugh. - Chuck, I'm gonna go for a quick eight. You ready? - Don't choke. - Okay, this is four. - But remember, it's not-- - Can you turn this flame off? - No, no, I just wanna have more than her. This is four. - But you're gonna try to see how much you can fit. - Well, first I'm gonna get eight. - Yeah, but that's just the first step towards the larger goal. - I don't know how much it'll fit. She has a huge mouth. Okay. - What I'm saying is-- - Horse mouth. - At the end of this, we will know how many you can fit in your mouth. - You've done this before, I can tell. - I swear. Maybe as a child. - Oh, well, you've done it before. So just so everybody knows, I've never done it. - I don't think I've ever done this before. Okay, here's four. - Oh, fuck. Five. Six. - Mm-hmm. - Mm-hmm. - What's that? - Don't make him laugh. Keep going, you're just getting started. They can stick out. They can keep, yeah. Just if you push them together, they can stick out and drink. Okay, I'll count for you. What's that, 11? - Mm-hmm. - 11? - Mm-hmm. - 12. Keep going. Don't make him laugh. 12. - Mm-hmm. - 13. You can keep, you can do the whole bowl if you focus. 13. 14. Keep going. 15. Wait, hold on. Let me just, don't get distracted by what I'm doing. I just have to film what you look like. Okay, you're at 15. Don't laugh, 16. Keep going. There's a whole bowl. 17. At this point, you're just building. - Mm-hmm. - Oh, I think he might've actually, he might be able to go forever now. 18. 19. It really comes down to laughing. It's not that. Hmm. What number is that? - 20. - 20? One. 21. 22. 23. 24. Don't laugh, stop. Just be focused. 25. We're just getting started. 26. I'm gonna get a different angle on you. Just 27. You look like Santa. Don't laugh. Oh no, that doesn't count. 28, I think. - Mm-hmm. - 29. Keep going. 30. 30. 31. 32. Just keep going. Maybe you're not at 33. Maybe this could go on forever. - This is insane. - 34. If anything falls, it's done. - Okay. - If they fall, they're done. Your structure's not valid. 34. - They're sticking together. - 35, I know, but they're hanging on by a thread. 36. Now he's scared of gravity, so he's cocked his head back. 37. I don't know. I've lost. 38. - Mm-hmm. - Okay. - This is insane. - Oh, the dangle. 39, but it's dangling. - Uh-oh. - Oh, smart adjustment. Wow, he ate six of them right there. 40. 41? Is that a-- - I don't even understand it anymore. - Gravity is-- - This is beyond. This is beyond. - It's beyond normal. - I've completely lost track. - I have no idea. - It's like 60. - I can't even believe this is happening. - Oh my God, but that's done. Time. - Oh, wow. - Time. - What was it? - I think it was 50 or something. - Oh. - All right. - Oh my God, my mouth feels crazy. - Yeah, I mean-- - My lips are like chapped. - Unbelievable. - Now. - Truly one of the coolest things you've ever done. - It was one of my favorite things you've ever done. - Yeah, it was one of your favorite things I've ever done. - Were you that kind of kid at the-- - Until this. - At the-- - - I'm sitting down for this. - Mm-mm. Don't, yeah. You would never. Your Achilles would rupture. - Check, I'm doing it right now. - Don't jump from the thing. - Where are you trying to jump? - To that thing. - I think that's such a bad-- - I don't know. - I would not do that. - I don't know if it's structurally sound at the end. - Check, I think I can do it. I think it's not-- - Benny, it's sticking out further. - Honestly, if you wanna be a-- - Check, I hope I slip and break my leg. - Maybe just do a little jump to the floor. - Do you even want me to move the phone-- - No. - Or the sunglasses? What if I just do one-- - Or the knife? - You have nowhere to land. - How could you not want-- - What do you mean? I'm gonna do one foot there and one foot-- - Oh my God, I can't, your Achilles is gonna rupture. - Should I try it? - I wouldn't, but you guys can do whatever you want. I just don't know that if it can take your weight. - This thing? - Check, first just hit down there and see if it can take my weight. Just like-- - Can you move my phone? - I have no idea. I'm not a physicist. - Can you move my phone-- - You don't know? - No, I don't know, like, weights. - Wait, just press hard over there. - Yeah, I think it can probably take your weight. - It's taking my weight. - You guys, this is not like jackass, get out. - I just wanna try. Check, should I try? - I'm not telling you to try. I think you do whatever you want. I'm obviously, I've backed up to see what happens if you try. - Do you want me to try? - No. - Check, there's so many sharp things. Okay, move the knife, move the knife. Just move the knife. - Move my-- - But leave the cell phone there. - Okay. - No, that's my phone. That's my cell phone. She doesn't want it there. - And move my sunglasses. - Gotta leave some obstacle. Leave the joint that's burnt. - I'll put the tape right here. - No, no, no, I don't like the tape. - Okay. - Check, I'm scared I'm gonna bang my head on this. - Benny, it's probably not a good idea. Benny, don't do it. What if you do hit your head or something? - No, I think I got it. - Look. - Oh, you did it. - That was so-- - I did it in one place. - That wasn't even hard. - That was so dumb. - I love it. - It was so anti-climactic. But over here, it actually looked like it was dangerous. - I thought it was very climactic. I was shocked. We were expected to be a simple step over. - That was the stupidest thing I ever watched. - What is your goal with this scary music? - Ever heard of a scary story freestyle? The stories I could tell you, you wouldn't be able to sleep. I got some real scary stories. You know, I have a song that I made called "Scary Story" that sucks, don't ever listen to it. Is this what it sounds like inside your brain all day? And it's like, it's like, do the, do the, don't do it. - Like kill myself? - Yeah. - This is not, this is too much for me. - You wanna try? You want me to? - I feel like I'm being like-- - Hello. - Hello. - Transported? - Oh wow. - Yeah, hypnotized. - You are. - I feel like you guys are, yeah. Wow he's so good You're like Chucky Yeah you are You would be like a hard You're like a hot Chucky - Come. - Come? - Come in. - We have everything you need. - I can't wait. - You wanna do it? - Yeah. - You do? - Yeah. - What beat do you wanna go on? - This. - Okay, okay. You can. - I just. - Furman. - Furman? - Furman? - Furman? - Furman. - What? - She's playing the wham. - It sounds like Blake Waikardi. That was cool. - Can you do it? - This sounds like one of the beats you. - I like this one. - Do your step dance. - I like it. - Am I even in the right key? - Take it. - Am I in the right key? - No. - Yep, you are. - Oh, yeah, you know what to do. - Yep. - What am I even doing? ♪ Let me out, let me out ♪ ♪ Let me free, let me out of this cage ♪ ♪ Let me go, let me out of this rage ♪ ♪ Let me go, let me know what I should pay ♪ ♪ Let me go, let me know what I should pay ♪ ♪ Let me go, let me know what I should pay ♪ Let me know where I should go, or I'm gonna die They're all gonna know, they're all gonna know They're all gonna say, they're all gonna say, they're all gonna go They're all gonna cry, they're all gonna die They're all gonna fly, they're all gonna say bye Three days go by, bodies decompose Media verges, friends call home Friends knew they were gone, friends tweeted Friends cried, friends died That was insane. I don't know, I like it better when we were eating marshmallows. I was having so much fun. Chuck, did it feel real? Yeah, real. Yeah. You didn't like that? I loved it. Everyone had to die. I thought that that was unbelievable. I thought that when I came out of here, everyone, you guys were gonna be like, that's the, the most. You were just like, everyone dies. Well, I thought we were supposed to do scary things. Your biggest fear was getting murdered, but how am I off topic? Speaking of fears, you have some OCD around one of your biggest fears. I do, and I don't love talking about it. My biggest fear is, like, my parents dying. That's one of my biggest fears, and I have a lot of OCD wrapped up into that, and I do some rituals around it. And honestly, it's not the right way to live, and if I knew about having a company like NoCD when I was really struggling at my peak with this thing when I was a kid, I might have tapped into it. I didn't know about it, unfortunately. Right. You should know that insurance actually covers 138 million Americans and includes support between sessions, so you never have to face OCD alone. You know. To learn more about starting. OCD therapy. To learn more about starting OCD, sorry, I have to read it again because it's OCD therapy. Yeah, I understand. Ah. To learn more about starting OCD therapy with NoCD, go to nocd.com/friends and book a free call with their team. That's nocd.com/friends. Hey, Chad. Yeah? I love drinking White Claw with my pals. Well, what about me? You're one of my pals. Oh. I think you're my best girl pal. You know what? What? On that note, I think we should have more nights where we drink White Claw together. I'm not drinking this on camera, but you know what I'm going to do? I'm staying home tomorrow, and I'm having a good time. You know what? I'm staying home tomorrow, and I'm having a backyard, pregame, day drinking, last minute party. I'll see you there. Can you say "spontaneous"? It's drink responsibly. Hard seltzer with flavors. White Claw Seltzer Works, Chicago, Illinois. I can. Look, why is falling asleep such a big thing- Why do you stick your tongue out when you go? I do. You went. What's the last way you'd want to die? Being murdered. Yeah. No, no. The type of way. What about skinned? Yeah, or suffocated. Yeah. Just like. Yeah. I mean, in the movies, being trapped under ice. Oh, my God. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Yeah. Trapped under ice is crazy. Do you ever worry about being in a factory, in your chains, getting stuck on the machinery? I'm choking you to death. Yeah. Jack, you ever worry about when you're in the factory? Have you ever stepped foot in a factory? I've never heard planes feel more- Yours are like fighter jets. Yeah. Literally, since we started creating these vignettes, it feels like- You mean filming a movie? Filming a podcast? No. The podcast? What do you mean? This is just a window into people hanging out. Chuck, is your biggest fear calling the vignette a podcast? I don't know what my biggest fear is. Probably not. I mean, look. Obviously, death. Not fulfilling my potential. I have- Your biggest fear is not- I have a big fear of, I have a really big fear of children coming and a number of things happening. One, me not feeling like the whole thing is that life changing. That's a fear. What's the whole thing? Being a father, having kids, like being kind of unmoved by children is a fear. I don't think that's going to happen. I think I want to be more moved than anyone, but it is a fear. More moved than anyone. Another fear is my body will break down before- That's kind of already happening. Before I'm able to play on the floor with the kids. Even with little kids that are family friends or whatever, when they want to play and they ask me to play, I play for five minutes and then I want to blow my head off. I just don't like playing. I have a fear that- I have a fear that I'm going to always think my kid is annoying because they want to spend time together. I'm optimistic that I will want to spend the time with the kid and that pivot will be what changes my life and my perspective for the better. But my fear is that it won't and that I'm trapped in this hell hole. Chuck, did you just say your biggest fear is that your kid will want to play with you? No. I mean, one fear is that I won't be moved- Your shirt is so long. Yes, Chuck. Your shirt is two-thirds your size. It's not that long. Chuck, your legs look like you look like a Oompa Loompa or something. In high school when your shirt was too short, they would say, "Your shirt is so young." Yeah. You do hate when your shirt is short. I've noticed that. I love it when my shirt is short. You always are like, "Is this shirt too short?" Oh, I hate the contemporary box, short, crop shirt. I hate it. Remember how good he looked the other day when he had it? Oh, yeah. I was like, "Oh, my God. I'm going to have to buy a new one." I'm going to have to buy a new one. I'm going to have to buy a new one. When he dresses and anything other than the Nike dry sport, I think you look so good right now, even though you are wearing a shirt that goes down to your knees. Do you think I have a good style? I love your style. Chuck, my biggest fear is that your shirt's going to fall down to your feet and take over your body. Do you think I have good style? You don't. Try. We'll go one at a time. Okay. You go first. You can go first. I already said it. Okay, do I think you have good style? You said what? Yes. I do think you have good style when you try, but for the past six years, every single day, you have worn a Nike dry sport shirt, one that traps your body odor. It makes you stink. I love the way you stink, so I don't mind it, but it is a unique choice for such a stylish man. I love it. Thank you. Those are days that I'm just with you. I know that you're- No. No, no. It's just days that you're with me. of you or like interview you're wearing the nike dress just for the last six years but it's wild so wait did you think i have good style or no yeah are you looking at me you're looking at benny oh my god do you benny can you see can anyone see i can see you check i'm looking at you not right now globally you don't have to look at me just what's your instinct good style or no i think you always have poor shoe choice for your outfit like you always have like chuck you always dress like like your shoes are like a man who has like plantar fasciitis they look like he doesn't care but he cares i do like you're like laissez-faire like attitude with style i do i do appreciate how like it's not stylish yeah but it's like so not stylish that it's stylish what do you think about mochi lee is she stylish i love her style well right now i'm kind of on a i love that hoodie yeah you are very stylish you've been 70s yeah yeah i think because um it's just because it's him no honestly what's happened is i got overwhelmed with the thought of having to pick you got a little overwhelmed with god damn what all the times i was going to have to pick out clothes for this vignette yeah segment segment no i like vignette podcast absolutely so i thought who cares i'll just wear t-shirts i think you look great in a t-shirt but i'm talking your hoodie is so good what about your style outside of this i haven't thought i i i don't we haven't gone anywhere you know he's way more flamboyant whatever and he said can i dress you for one night and he made me wear like these i looked like a coal miner like the outfit was so ridiculous is that your guys's 30s i i said i would love to wear this because i i it like it flabbergasted me that he even owned this outfit seriously and i wore it like honestly to make fun of him i have never gotten more compliments on my outfit everyone's like oh my god man you look so cool it's just like a cool pair check out oh my god i'm having probably the most fun on any vignette most fun on any vignette we've ever done why don't you do an accent for us let's hear that again i'm so bad at accents just try one no we're gonna have to cut out whatever accent you do new zealand or something uh new zealand no i don't even know why you'd go there that wasn't i don't even know why you laughed so automatically that no matter what i said because you do it all the time and it always sounds like that it's like you broke your jaw how about this southern accent don't interrupt me well sheesh oh i'd like to tell you a story about a feller by the name of carlos see carlos was a gambling man well sheesh just about everybody was back then that was really good it was awful until just about everyone was back no no you said like carlos really well i think it is just you have to work like bradley can you tell me what you're thinking i think it's just you have to work like bradley can you tell me what you're thinking really well i think it is just you have to work like bradley can you tell me what you're thinking bradley cooper i think went to a dialect coach bradley cooper i think went to a dialect coach bradley cooper i think went to a dialect coach coach to do the you can't even speak regular coach to do the you can't even speak regular coach to do the you can't even speak regular english english english they're gonna have to reconfigure your jaw they're gonna have to reconfigure your jaw they're gonna have to reconfigure your jaw okay let's see you guys do an accent okay let's see you guys do an accent okay let's see you guys do an accent um let me see here oh um let me see here oh um let me see here oh is it a good one yes whoa it was a good is it a good one yes whoa it was a good one isn't it where are you going just chilling where are you going just chilling where are you going just chilling what if i just the glass just shy just what if i just the glass just shy just what if i just the glass just shy just fell right through the home don't you fell right through the home don't you fell right through the home don't you want to jump off a building sometimes want to jump off a building sometimes want to jump off a building sometimes me or you no just in life like never me or you no just in life like never me or you no just in life like never really whenever i see a ledge i just really whenever i see a ledge i just really whenever i see a ledge i just like immediately want to run and fly off like immediately want to run and fly off like immediately want to run and fly off and when i was young my that's crazy you and when i was young my that's crazy you and when i was young my that's crazy you should go see a doctor you're having should go see a doctor you're having should go see a doctor you're having suicidal thoughts you're telling me if suicidal thoughts you're telling me if suicidal thoughts you're telling me if you're on top of like a big tall you're on top of like a big tall you're on top of like a big tall building you never look at it and just building you never look at it and just building you never look at it and just want to run full speed and jump off no i want to run full speed and jump off no i want to run full speed and jump off no i think about how i don't want to do that think about how i don't want to do that think about how i don't want to do that you're telling me you don't like when you're telling me you don't like when you're telling me you don't like when you're driving down the highway you you're driving down the highway you you're driving down the highway you don't like this is a different don't like this is a different don't like this is a different situation situation situation but no i don't want to just fly off but no i don't want to just fly off but no i don't want to just fly off no sometimes when people cross the no sometimes when people cross the no sometimes when people cross the street i think if i just street i think if i just street i think if i just went up a little further i could knock went up a little further i could knock went up a little further i could knock him in the ankles when i was young i him in the ankles when i was young i him in the ankles when i was young i went to the grand canyon with my family went to the grand canyon with my family went to the grand canyon with my family i was like eight and i literally had so i was like eight and i literally had so i was like eight and i literally had so much confidence back then and like not much confidence back then and like not much confidence back then and like not fear of this type of thing that i told fear of this type of thing that i told fear of this type of thing that i told my parents i said i know that if i my parents i said i know that if i my parents i said i know that if i jumped i would be able to survive and jumped i would be able to survive and jumped i would be able to survive and land it that's what do you think about that well that's what do you think about that well that's what do you think about that well i think more stressful do you think what i think more stressful do you think what i think more stressful do you think what type of parent do you guys think you're type of parent do you guys think you're type of parent do you guys think you're gonna be really good ones great ones gonna be really good ones great ones gonna be really good ones great ones what i was saying i don't predict what what i was saying i don't predict what what i was saying i don't predict what happened it's just a fear i would be happened it's just a fear i would be happened it's just a fear i would be that would be go as long as you can don't stop you have go as long as you can don't stop you have go as long as you can don't stop you have to go as long as you can to go as long as you can to go as long as you can don't i guarantee you i can go so much longer i guarantee you i can go so much longer i guarantee you i can go so much longer after him after him after him okay all right okay okay you guys you have to do that voice like you have to do that voice like you're so much shorter do you know how to rock do you know how do you know how to rock do you know how do you know how to rock do you know how to rock scream to rock scream to rock scream so when you rock scream you have to you so when you rock scream you have to you so when you rock scream you have to you have to go you have to go have to go you have to go have to go you have to go you have to go you have to go and then you have to slowly go up no i and then you have to slowly go up no i and then you have to slowly go up no i can do that into a scream okay chuck can do that into a scream okay chuck can do that into a scream okay chuck you go first you go first you go first you go first like a cow i don't want to do it because i have i don't want to do it because i have i don't want to do it because i have made it now you try i don't like that what sounds like a yawn okay i'll try what sounds like a yawn okay i'll try what sounds like a yawn okay i'll try yeah okay i think okay i think okay i think chuck do you like summer camp yeah chuck do you like summer camp yeah chuck do you like summer camp yeah favorite part of life it was one of my favorite part of life it was one of my favorite part of life it was one of my favorite times in my entire life favorite times in my entire life favorite times in my entire life and i just reconnected with a few of our and i just reconnected with a few of our and i just reconnected with a few of our friends that i hadn't connected with friends that i hadn't connected with friends that i hadn't connected with meeting up and renting a home on airbnb meeting up and renting a home on airbnb meeting up and renting a home on airbnb and just like doing a whole color wars and just like doing a whole color wars and just like doing a whole color wars thing and having like the best time thing and having like the best time thing and having like the best time airbnb is something that i haven't airbnb is something that i haven't airbnb is something that i haven't really spoken about how airbnb really spoken about how airbnb really spoken about how airbnb connected us early on in our connected us early on in our relationship. Oh yeah. It did? Yeah. If you hadn't booked that home on Airbnb's platform that day, you wouldn't have given me that ride home. We wouldn't have connected maybe at the length. I think we would have connected anyways, but thank you. It was a gift. Airbnb connected us because I got to give you the ride home and I got to spend extra time with you and I got to know you. We respect you. We love you Airbnb. We love Airbnb and we love you. You know, we're not the only multimedia experience. Oh yeah. We are kind of, but. No. Canva. Yeah. Yeah, they can do a lot of things. It's a diverse program. It is a diverse program. Yeah, I said it weird. You did say it weird, but that's okay. If you were using Canva, you could probably just say it however you want to say it and it would get it. Because it's word, you prompt it with the words. Yeah, it can kind of understand whatever prompt you give it. I think it does a lot of different things. I think if you're like, "Hey, help me make this video," it can do it. Yeah. "Make this poster for me." I mean, that's just. That is cool that you can like use. There's so many more like creative platforms to use. I can't believe it. Canva. What's that mean? Just because C-A-N? I can't believe it? Canva? Canva makes design easy for anyone. With built-in AI that lets you remove, generate, and animate content in just a click. Start designing today at canva.com. What's your fear? Sex becoming complicated. And what would become complicated? If, for example, one day you said to me like, "You know, I'd really like it if you started like talking dirty to me the whole time we have sex." Yeah, you don't like that. I would be. And you meant it. I would be just rocked and I would not know how to move forward. I'd have to immediately probably go to therapy to have any understanding of how to approach this. Because when you say that, I can't necessarily. Like me saying back like that makes me uncomfortable. It's such a turn-off when they're just saying, "To turn me on requires this aggressiveness." Yeah. Yeah, I see what you're saying. You get in your head about it. Like what if she was just like, "The only way I'm gonna be happy is if we like had sex like twice a day." Well, that's different. That's different than talking dirty. Oh, so that one, you're not afraid of that complication? So it's just talking dirty? It's not just talking dirty. It's just becoming. Sexually unaligned. Oh yeah, that's a good fear. We're so sexually aligned in every way. Like literally, I'm not exaggerating. Every single time that we have sex, it feels like. The other night, the last time we had sex, I said I felt like that was the best time we ever had sex. And so only recently did I personally just have the best sex of my life. Do you think about that? Yeah. Do you feel the same way? Yeah. You do? One hundred percent. Cool. Yeah, it's pretty chill at our house. It's so nice. That's cool. You know, you should just like, one day, just like fuck with them. Just throw some- No. Just be like, actually like- I just see you as first woman. What is it? Eve? But not even. Not even? Not even. Oh, wow. You just bring out an animal in me. Cool. You're the one who asked. Tell us about you and Selena's sex life. I'm not allowed to talk about that publicly. Oh, wow. She made you sign one? No. I'm just like a gentleman. Kind of just like a thing I do. I'm like a gentleman or something. I don't know. Don't worry. Open up your explore page real quick. Guys, this is how you know it's real and we're really just living inside a vignette. Reggie Neis. Our dog. of two years. I can't believe he's making his debut. He just arrived. Are you excited? Oh my god. Hi. How was he? He was so good. Such a good boy. What's happening? Thank you so much. I'll see you tomorrow. Thank you. Big boy. Hey Reggie. Reggie? Where's Reggie? Reggie, why don't you come over here, dog? Yeah! He is! Hey Reggie. Wow. I mean, he's, I mean, there's a lot going on here. He's like, he's a smart dog. He's figuring. There's nothing going on. What's he doing? Sipping water? Yeah, his food's over there. Why don't you shut that door so he can't get back outside? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Good call. Well, anyway, one of Dave's biggest fears is Reggie dying in front of him. Reggie, why don't you come over here and speak on this? Oh, wow. The bone dog, Reggie Neas. Oh, hey Neas. Chuck, can you believe Reggie? You alive over there? It's like I'm hanging. I'm having gas issues. I'm like, hey, fart. Do you think it was the marshmallows? I've been holding them in. Do you think it was when you stuck 87 marshmallows? No, I just don't want to fart all over the camera. Like, I don't want to fart, like, so much. So much? You're worried? I farted so many times. I farted on camera earlier. So you're just going to hold them in? Yeah, I don't believe it. You strike me as the kind of guy who, if there is a good fart to have, you would attempt it. I don't want to do that. Can I tell you my theory? What? You're scared you're going to shit your pants because you've had shit in your ass all day. Am I right? Should we just be silent for a little? Yeah. Okay. Reggie is like, the lack of attention he's paid us is shocking. Okay, hold on, hold on, hold on. Reggie. Shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh. I mean, people probably like a little silence. Okay, okay, let's try to be silent. It's not good. It's not good. It's not good.