The Curse

- Hey Seth, I know that this isn't the right time to bring this up, but will you actually come pick me up from the bisect me when I get one? Like, I just wanna said, in fact, this isn't the right time to bring it up? I feel like this is the only place it's ever discussed. - It feels like exactly the right time. - I mean, ideally, we're not having a second conversation about this. - After this. - Listen, get it out of the way, I guess. - Well, I just wanna wrap it up. I just wanna put a, you know, button on it and fucking be done with it. Like, can you do it? - Yeah, but like, when are you gonna do it? I'll do it whenever it's like good for you. Well, I just, my problem is, did it get harder? - Because now I have to like carry you to the car or something. - Is penis? - I was gonna say, I don't think it affects that. - That did, it did seem like we were talking about my penis. - I mean, historically, no. I'll, I'll figure it out with Kevin. I'll do it on and off week, or maybe that's worse, but we'll figure it out. - So, Yo, I'm about to bad accident in your, your late 40s. Does it get harder? - Oh yeah. (laughing) - All right, we're often running. John Hamm is here. A lot more Vass talk than I was expecting. (laughing) - Oh man. - Like, that there's just any at all. - Well. - Hey, John, if you're in town, you can come to. - Fine, I'm, you know, I've had to, I've had to enlist a lot of very unwilling participants to pick me up after my colonoscopies. - No, John, you always say you gotta give the Vass a lot of difference, right? You always pay a difference to the Vass. - No, I give mad difference to the Vass. (laughing) - I mean, what's the difference between the difference? (laughing) Is this something, Seth? There's a Vass difference between the difference of the difference. Once it's cut, there's a difference. - You gotta be different when it comes to the Vass. - I'm just very excited about like just a couple days into the future when Kiva's like, so this is what it turns into. - Fuck him. - You know what? Fuck him. (laughing) - I wonder what she'll show. ♪ The lonely island and Sethfire's podcast show ♪ - So Akiva could be here today, but he said, "Please replace me with what he called the Keeve type, and then he gave us a list." - Yeah. - And then top of the list. - And John Hamm was the only name of the list. - John Hamm. - A selection of one. - Welcome, John Hamm. - Hi guys. - It's very exciting. We are talking about John Hamm. This is your second time hosting, but it's your first short. - And it is. - And my first long time listener, first time at 10D. - Yes. - Yeah. - Yeah. - At the peak. - You are a member of Quaid Army in good standing. I think we all know that. - I hope. - Very much so. More text from this guy than most Quaid Army. - FOTS, friend of the show. - I do check in quite a bit. I might've been the first guy to give you my own bag of solid nickname, which we may or may not want to share, but. - Oh yeah. Probably not. - Probably not. - Should we do a classic thing where we say it and then Seth has them cut it out and everyone gets mad at him? - Yeah, but then we-- - Like you did last time? - Yeah. - What the fuck? - Maybe we hear the reaction. - Just say what it is. - Say what it is. - Well, I dubbed this group. (beep) - Yeah, that's right. - Leave it. (laughing) - Perfect. - A lot of extra letters. - Good way to start the show with something that I can't hear. John, I don't know if this is your memory, but your first episode was an exceptionally good first episode for anybody hosting. And yet, I think this is better. - I was looking at that rundown, Seth Lee, and I was like, this was a banger show. - This is peak Golden Era. - I mean, I'm not gonna, yeah, not to toot my own horn, but my own saxophone. (laughing) - Yeah, foreshadowing. - Well, you know-- - That's another foreshadowing is also another word for a vasectomy. - Vasectomy. - Oh, I was gonna sign. Thank you. - Forsecordery. - Be there or be square, Seth. - Yeah, the reason why the first one stood out, so significantly to me. - foreshadowing is when you're interting at a bris. - I was gonna say, yeah, the vasectomy, you have to be on circumcision. - Let me just hang out here by you, Rabbi. - Sorry. - I just wrote a foreshadowing a little bit. - Yeah, yeah, I was foreshadowing. I was just seeing how it's done. - It's amazing, yeah, yeah. - You gotta get a certain number of hours, it's like your pilot's license. - Yeah. - Everybody has a first time, first day school. - Have you guys been to one of those? - We're a school. - Have I been to a bris. - How many brises have you guys been to? - Yeah, I've been to one. - I've been to two. - Two. - I've been to two boys. - I think I, I must have had one performed on me, although it probably didn't call it a bris. - Right. - Yeah, I definitely attended my own. - The reason it was so, it stood out to me so much was because Polar had a baby the first time I hosted. So that was its own kind of very special episode. - What you famously referred to is stealing your thunder. - Very, very clearly. - Yeah, very vocal about that. - Got an extra update piece out of it. Elizabeth Moss had to come in. They cut my Bronx beat. There's a lot going on there. - The hell. - The hell. - Polar's such a shitstack. - The hell. - Defend yourself, Polar. - The hell. - I remember you loudly saying to Lauren, like they'd still do Bronx beat if Betty was sick. - Yeah. - And you just thought it should've been a one woman Bronx beat. - It's a one on one. Just making a one on one. (laughing) Oh, she couldn't be here. - But yeah, also, I mean, again, your first show was great. It's a Vincent Price, it's a Jeff Montgomery. It's a A-holes. So like you would think based on that, tough to be. - Yeah, we had some home runs on the first one for sure, but like as you said, man, so many home run hitters in the cast, I just, anything that was coming back was clearly something that already worked not only with the audience, but you could kind of plug and play with people that were really having fun with it. So for example, yeah, Bronx beat being one of them unfortunately, I didn't get a chance to do it. I think they did it later with, do you know what I mean? I can't remember. - Yeah, Jake did one. - Yeah, somebody else came back and did that one. But yeah, I mean, A-holes, like it was so great. It was just so great. There was such a deep bench for people to roll through and hit the ball out of the park. - But like, I look through this. I feel like across the board almost everybody has a perfect sort of representation of what their best version of a sketch is in this show. - We give some examples. Are you really? - So, all right, so Wig off the top, you have Wig doing "Do Make Me Sing," which is, literally an all-time great sketch that I have re-watched recently. - Yeah, so wide. - Independent of this podcast. - Yep, me too. - I do still quote it. - Me too. - I mean, the premise of "Do Make Me Sing" is it's a sort of like roaring 20s type dinner party. Everybody's asking, "John to play piano." And then just sort of from the back of the room, Wig says, "Do Make Me Sing." And it's this really, the game is very simple, which is she keeps saying, "Do Make Me Sing," even though no one has asked you. - No one has asked you. - And it works really well. Everybody's on board. - Do you want to sing? No, I couldn't possibly. No, no, no, no, no. Everyone's making me. - "Do Make Me Sing." - And then you, I can't remember what it is. Like somebody says, "Can you play Rhapsody in Blue?" And she goes, "Oh, Bill Bailey." So she very much only knows how to sing "Oh, Bill Bailey." Fortunately you as her company does not have to play it. And then the game, which again, it was a fun enough game that she was like, "Do Make Me Sing." Is that she's also terrible singing. - Terrible singing. - She keeps coming in. - And can't come in on the sheet. - She keeps missing the end. - Yes. - And it's a real thing. - And then it's frustrated and takes it out on everybody else. 'Cause they ruined it. You're making me sing. - So like a lot of wig characters are like unofficially and some officially are like a person's bummer aunt. - Yeah. - For sure. - Surprise. - Yeah. - This one is the fun thing. It's a bummer aunt move. - But she has this wonderful voice. Don't make me sing. (laughing) - Was that first up? - That was early. I think that was the first sketch out of "Out of the Monologue." Was it the first "Do Make Me Sing"? - I think it was the only thing you sing. - Well then it was. - It was a one and done. - Yeah. - And you were right. - But to have her meet a spike. - There's a great moment where she's having trouble coming in. And. (audience laughing) - And sing. - Sing on the one and the one. - Do you need a signal? - Just nod when you need me to come in. (audience laughing) - Oh hello. - You missed it. (laughing) - She immediately forgets the nod. She thinks you're like flirting with her. - Hello. - Also then everybody's mad. - Finally they just ask you to play. You know. - Some freeform jazz, I believe. Doodly doodly doodly doodly doodly doodly doodly doodly doodly doodly. Do you remember what she says when you start playing freeform jazz? - Oh, don't make me dance. - Yeah, don't make me dance. (laughing) - An escalation. Ham, were you a part of the writing process with this one for "The Sublette Intercept?" Do you remember? - No. So coming back the second time, I was first of all thrilled. - And so cocky, right? Just fucking like. - I will say I was definitely not cocky, but I definitely felt like I was very cognizant of what was to be expected. Much more so than from the first time, which was utterly unaware. And so I was more excited than nervous. So I was stoked 'cause again, by this point, I kinda knew almost everybody. I knew some people cone in the first time, but I knew most of you guys much more after. This was almost a year later. - Yeah. - 'Cause I did the Halloween episode and this was like Valentine's Day or something. - You also knew us from like stopping by the show though. I felt like there was this real crossover between Mad Men and the show. - Oh yeah, for sure. - And I remember coming in to see you guys in your office. I remember it was just so cold and you guys were all sick. - Well, yeah. - And this is like a pre-COVID idea of people being sick and it's like, let's just hang out in a closed room together, guys. 'Cause we're all super sick. - Yeah. - And you guys being really tired and really sick and like, yeah. - You guys just wanted to do, 'cause I didn't get to do the short, the first time I hosted it was Roz Trent. And you guys were like, we have this one idea. It's like the Kool-Aid man, but you're Tim Capelli from the Lost Boys and I was like, that's really funny. You're never gonna do that, but I'll do it if you guys want. Ha ha, see you never, 'cause you're never gonna do it. And then literally like two days later, you're like, well, here's the sax. And I was like, ah, here's your outfit. - All right, wait. So first of all, I do want to say it's a January 30th. So you host in October of '08. Now this is January 30th of 2010. So it's been about 16 months, okay. But that is when I think about a January 30th show, that is where everybody is sick. 100% disaster time to come through and host the show. - So cool, it was so cool. - So if we're gonna get into the short, talk about this Lost Boys character, which is not like the most iconic character, but like your and Andy, like, was this the thing that you talked about? - Let me ask you a question. It is for certain people I feel like. Let me ask some prelim questions. I know Keith wasn't there. Oh my God, John has a picture of him framed on his wall. - Well, is it from who signed? - The sign by the guy. - Oh my God. - And it says, the description says, "Thank you for giving me a second career." - Oh my God, what a dream. - That's wonderful. That's like why you do art, you know? - One of the key grips that I worked with on a movie was his cousin. And he said, "I've gotta give you this picture "that my cousin promised if I ever met you." I would give you a picture. - I don't use this phrase often, but that fucking rocks. (laughing) Well, Andy, why don't you explain what the reference is a little bit? - Well, first off, Keith was not here this week. Were you there? - Keith, I don't know if I was either, because I don't think you were, because this is my recollection. You are the one who showed this to me. I had seen Lost Boys when I was a kid, but shockingly one of the things I didn't remember vividly was Tim shredding on Sacks in the concert scene. So you were obsessed with it. I want to give-- - It's a little bit blinkin', you miss it. - Yeah, I want to give you the credit for bringing it to my attention. - I don't know if it's blinkin', you miss it. You guys got to watch Lost Boys. - I mean, if you blink, it's real. Like if you blink, like you blink for like three or four seconds. (laughing) - It's a super slow-mo blink. - He is rocking out. - So I just wanna, I'm gonna briefly just read the Tim Capello Wikipedia overview. - Tim Capello, also credited as Tim Capello, is an American multi-instrumentalist composer and vocalist he is primarily known for his saxophone work supporting Tina Turner in the '80s and '90s, as well as for his musical performance in the 1987 vampire film The Lost Boys. - Yeah. - You can definitely tell it's a famous person 'cause you're like, "Why would you stay on this as long as you are in this particular film?" 'Cause it's not really about a saxophonist. - It's not remotely about a saxophonist. (laughing) - You're right, you're right. - When you walked out of Lost Boys, you were like, "I thought the balance between vampire "and that saxophone guy was good." - Yeah, I felt like it was mostly not about a saxophone. - That was probably the best vampire saxophone movie I ever saw. (laughing) - I can't remember who was more obsessed with it, was it Akiva or like 'cause we all lived together and I feel like these were things that got, these were like early viral moments from things. I mean, like without the internet, that didn't actually happen. - I can see that, like there's definitely something that you're like, "This is way too long of a cutaway "to the grinding leather clad shirtless crotch "of this dude wailing on a sax in a concert scene." - Yeah. - Like thrusting and bust and really, really thrusting and gyrating. - Yeah, and oiled up and looking fucked. - Yes, so in it. - Proper, yeah. - Well, but I also feel like in a teen which kind of way, like the rap scene from Teen Witch, like those are also things that Keeve got pretty obsessed with as well. So I'm not sure what like, if it was- - Well, Teen Witch was me 'cause I was- - Oh, that was you. - It was on cable, the one of the cable channels I had growing up, Teen Witch was on over and over and me and my sister were doing. - I feel like that's what kind of constituted virality and that certain time in the late 90s was if it was on Nickelodeon or some cable channel that you had on heavy rotation, then you were gonna pick out the important parts. - Yes. - And my sister would do top that with each other and- - Yeah, and if you were particularly sarcastic, kids watching these things, you'd be like, "Oh my God, what was that, what's that saxophone?" - Well, you know what I mean? Especially growing up in the bay and being super in a rap and being like, "What is this?" - But noticing Tim Capallo in "Lost Boys," like this was an early way to signal people that you sort of had like comedy nerd cred. Like that you knew the reference. - I had certainly never heard of it. - I knew "Lost Boys," but it did not stand out to me 'cause I had only seen it if you could ask. - Again, I only knew it 'cause your arm had showed it to us and we were like, "That's fucking incredible." - Okay. - To marry that with the cool later and then slather it with a Stephen King thinner story. - Well, it was actually threefold because the structure of it is based on an old, I wanna say twilight zone episode. - Sounds right. - Ooh, classy. That sounds classy, bro. Which is a guy, I forget the actual real thing. It's basically like a guy, this might have been a 90s twilight zone reboot or something. - That's classy. - Hit us in the tittest. Someone out there is definitely gonna know what I'm talking about. - That's ringing a bell for me. - Where a guy is like visited by a gargoyle or something. - Oh, right, yes. - There's like a murder, he accidentally kills someone and a gargoyle from his building turns real and tells him he'll get away with it. - It's a movie and that star is Ray Don Chong, so I can look it up. - No, it was at the twilight zone. - No, no, no, no, I know what it is. Hold on, keep going. - What? - I'm pretty sure that Andy's right behind me. - Twist for the fire. - Keep going, keep going. (laughing) - Oh, it might be in the twilight zone movie and it's one of a bunch of vignettes. I don't know. - Yes. - All right, while you guys Google, I'm gonna bring in one more bizarre coincidence that has to do with Tim Cappello. So at the time, I had my first dog and over the course of my dog's life, lovely dog, lived for me for 15 years, not to bring up dead dogs, but my dog had to be put down and then. - Frisbee. (laughing) - Oh, all right, sorry, I'm ham. John, I'm so sorry for your loss. - My dog, Korra, actually, we didn't have to put her down. She ended up dying in her sleep, but at a certain point, we had to, you know, kind of wrap her up and take her away to get cremated and all the other stuff. So we had an end of life kind of veterinarian that had been with her and given her all this, like acupuncture and stuff over the course of her, of her later part of her life. While this woman is taking my dog who passed away peacefully in the night, wrapping her up kind of and putting her in a way to take away to the place. She goes, "Hey, you know what, I used to be a roadie for Tim Cappello." (laughing) - Wow. - I was like, wait, what? She goes, "Yeah, I was in my previous career. I was like a roadie for Tina Turner and Journey and all these guys that be on the road with them." And Tim Cappello was one of the guys that, he's a really nice guy anyway, you know. And I'm like, "There's a lot of emotions coming." In my head right now, but nostalgia wasn't, I didn't think it was gonna be one of them. - You're like, "You shell-jogged." - Hey, you sat about your dog. You want to think about something fun? - No, how about this? - All right, I'm right. It was Tales from the Dark Side, The Movie. - Really? - Yes. - I do remember that. I knew that was real. - And I went to see this on a date, and it's Lover's Val. It was a three-man-yet stories. - Yeah. - Preston is a struggling artist. He lives in a studio with a skylight through which a large stone gargoyle on a neighboring building pierced down. Preston's eight-new calls, asking to meet him in a bar, a few blocks away, they had to remember him. Along the way, Preston stops to relieve himself at a back alley when his friend sees and shoots at a gargoyle monster. The creature attacks, severing his hand, and then decapitating him. Terrified Preston tries to ride away, but the creature corners him and speaks, agreeing to spare his life, if he swears never to reveal what he's seen. - Right, yes. - And then his life goes on as normal. He meets a woman, he falls in love, he has kids, and then he fucks up at the end and tells her what he saw, and she goes, "No!" And like her skin and stuff falls off, and she's the gargoyle, and then you pan over, and there are two kids, there are little gargoyle kids. It's so fucking heavy, it's scary. Anyway, this is not one for one with that, but this and other twilight's only things, this structure of someone's an asshole, they get a curse put on them, they're like, "Yeah, right." And then it starts coming to pass. And so the idea here was, what if that curse was the saxophone guy from Las Boyes bustin' through the wall, like the Kool-Aid man every time you're a piece of shit? - I mean, it's really fascinating to eventually get to the place where we realized these three disparate threads, because as the shorts go, this one does have like the most story structure, and to be honest, like a very terrifying ending. (laughing) - Agreed. Okay, so it's much longer than anyone I think we ever did before or after. - But that said, it does get to the punch pretty quick. Again, you guys are so efficient. - Well, here's the thing though, but let's give credit where credit's due here, because this is a predominantly Chrysler and Andy, because I don't remember this at all either, and I'm looking at the date of this, and I'm like, "Oh, we were deep in the edit of McGurber, "which was down the street at the Brille building," which is another like SNL office. - Yeah, I remember it was the first time I had met Chrysler. - Yeah, I think it was just me and Jonathan. - Yeah, yeah, so it's, you know, I mean, I know Kev has his own thoughts on this short as well that we get to the voice note, I haven't, but I haven't listened to his voice note. I also will say, I have not watched the curse, I don't think, since it aired. - I'm very excited to watch this one with you, Turkey. - Oh, so you haven't even watched it to get ready for this? - No, I intentionally didn't, 'cause I wanna come in like, truly having like a fresh look at it. (laughing) - Yeah, I'm very, I'm very excited. - Did you watch it him? - I've seen it, yeah. [BLANK_AUDIO] because I've watched it specifically for this, but I've seen it probably in the last six months. - 'Cause you have it like geared up and like ready to show to people, right? Any time you do a new job, you'd like, "Oh, take a look at what I do." - Every time I see it, it makes me laugh. - Also, you look, all structure mires, I mean, I love how the pieces fit together in this thing. - You like that. - Oh, I remember when it ended having a real, my god, they've done it. - Well, let's get to the ending after we watch, 'cause I do wanna talk about how that felt. - Also, one comment I feel like I have to read after you are established that he and Keith weren't there. And of course, they were not there for last week's short, as well, "Legicats Five." One of the Clayd army wrote in, "I thought you guys might be interested "in how many times Kiever, "you're mentioned how many times they weren't there this week." So I listened to the pod twice and double checked my work. They each said it one million times. (laughing) - I really like our fans. And I do think, I just want Clayd army to know, I think one of the reasons that Yoram and Kiever point out why they weren't there is to get out of the way of any credit they might catch. - Yes. - And they're actually doing it for the most noble, it comes. - That's how it feels to me. - Yes, it comes from a place of sort of an obscene ability. - But, but, when you hear Kiever's voice note, which I did listen to, he's got some critiques. (laughing) - Oh yeah, and he had them, oh no, that's, he had them on Sunday, to me. - And I just deeply remember watching this one and not having nearly the- - I'll be curious to see what he said his voice note. It's one of the only times ever with Kiever, I was like, come on man. - Yeah, it's usually, like wow. - He was picking some nits really. - He wasn't there, you know? - Yeah, very interesting. - All right, should I share screen? And you guys tell me when to stop listening. - Yes please, Seth. - They also have the audience response, sometimes in the audio of these, right? 'Cause I remember it playing really hot. - Yeah, we'll be hearing that. So, we're gonna put that theory to the test hammer. (tires screeching) (laughing) - Good music so far, immediately, like the music. - Uh-huh. - Yeah, no, I hear what you're seeing Bradley. But if she wants to play in the big leagues, she's gonna have to get her hands dirty. - Yo, yo break the sacred talisman. - Maybe you shouldn't have left it lying in the street. - You pay me. - Kiss my ass. (tires screeching) - Did you guys write that? (tires screeching) Sergio! (laughing) I curse you. - Nice try, buddy. Anyways, all right. I mean, we've established everything we need right there. - Yeah, that's a real movie. - We know why it's called the curse. - Yeah. - And not Sergio. - We get Sergio out there. - We think this is in the 80s, yeah? - 90s. - We think, based on the car in your look, this guy is, it definitely related to the dude you played in hero song. - Yes, for sure. Same suit, similar. - But everything about your look. Again, you know, early digital shorts, you did not have the full wardrobe department behind you. They absolutely murder it both with your look and Fred's look. - Yeah, also the sacred talisman is like just a dream catcher. - Yeah, it's a dream catcher. - It's a cool dream catcher. - I like Andy when your hair is blown dry. Is it really does? It gets a lot of loft. - Yeah. - You can see who I would have been in New York in the 80s, for sure. (laughing) - But everything, again, we're 41 seconds in and that is with the digital short title card and we know everything we need to know. - Fred committed to the bit, even as the shot plays off of him too. - Well, Ham, I don't know if Fred in the curse fake language, but I think he probably did. - I think he probably did. - I'm guessing, yeah. - Yeah. - Another Fred character that is, of course, unlike every, like snowflake characters from Fred and by that, I mean, none are exactly alike. - Not exactly alike. - Can I comment on one thing that I think I keep is already gonna have had a problem with is the jump cut push in as we pull back and then there's a push in on you. Like there's a jump to it. - Did you say you already listened to his voice note? - No, I don't think he mentioned that in the voice note, but I'm sure, 'cause I remember him being like, we would never do that. That's just not what we do. And I was like, on my hands. - It's not part of our visual vocabulary. - Yeah. - I do wanna just drill down on how quickly and he found the logic problem of your I'm saying. I already listened to it and then your I'm saying. I wonder if this is gonna be in it. - You're rubbing off one, I'm saying. - That's true. I like, I blame a lot of stuff on this pod now of my drug use that, 'cause I'm on a lot of bin killers because of my, yeah. It works pretty good. - Oh, since I have that, somebody said, I love that your my 15 pound terrier are on the same medication. But anyway, everybody talks about their dogs on this bed. - I gave my dog Gabbapent in the other day. - Yeah, first of all, I take more of it than a dog. - All right, is that good? - I don't know, my dog's 95 pounds. He's probably on similar dogs. (laughing) - I probably take double that. - Is your dog taking it, 'cause it fell off a ladder? - Oh. - All right, just keep going, press the plate. (laughing) - All right, guys, I know numbers are down, but if we just apply this system, I promise you, we're gonna see revenue skyrocket. - Can we pause? - I think this is the exact same setup as like a boss. - Yeah, no, it really doesn't. And hair wise too. - Same hair, basically the same suit. - It's also like the same stock footage is in like, probably like 90% of it. - I know, it's just ice cream flavors on the spreadsheet thing behind you. - Oh, is it? - Yeah, chocolate, rocky roads, strawberry vanilla. I think you're really seriously discussing. - That's what this guy does. - Ice cream guy, we stick to the process. - If you wanna know how you keep one of these moving, it's that he says things like tell her if she wants to be in the big league, she's gotta learn how to play ball. And also, I know numbers are down. - She's gotta get her hands dirty. - Oh, he's gotta hands me. - Yeah. (dramatic music) (laughing) (upbeat music) - Oh, I wanna make some little nods from that lady. The lady's like it. (laughing) - Gosh, guys. Marshy team. - Siv's ya'll. - All right, so a lot happened. - Yeah. - Now what you're, if you didn't know what this was about, I'm guessing that's not what you were guessing. It was gonna happen. - The audience certainly didn't really know what was going on. - They're not with it, they're not with it yet. - I think there was a bit of a laugh, no? A titter? - There's a bit of a laugh, but it's the bill. I'm only saying like, I wanted to get full credit for how it builds in both how the beats are better and the storytelling gets very sticky. - They're not quite sure what they're laughing at yet, other than it is absurd. The audience, I feel like, is treating it kind of like the people around that conference room table were, which they're kind of like looking like what's happening? - Yeah. - Okay. Oh, I'm gonna get up and start dancing now. - Yeah, pretty positive. - Also, one woman and one man got up to dance. - No, you know. - Yeah, it wasn't just that the ladies were into it. - There's some pretty good cutaways of your bod too. - We also don't quite know, it's a horror movie yet, 'cause nothing really horrific has happened. Even you weren't that scared, Andy. - No, correct. - Just a little confused. - Confused, yeah, like, what the hell? Gotta just burst through the wall. - Now, I will say, I wanna remind everybody that when we're shooting these things, we're on some, what are we on, like, night floor, some weird 60, we're building these stages in some random place. It's probably, you know, two in the morning and it's freezing cold, whatever the place is, we're shooting these on these stages is so cold. - Yes. - And I'm covered in gel. - Yes. - Yeah, yeah, you are. - And I'm blowing out, but I can't blow out, because I have to puff out my cheeks and there's no read in that saxophone. - Yeah. - So I'm basically holding my breath and on more than one occasion, I almost passed out. - Yeah, you're saying acting is hard, right? Like, I mean, don't forget, we're all sick. - Everybody's sick. - Everybody's sick. - This is pre-COVID, but people still get sick. All right, let's keep going. (audience laughing) - So you're just thinking about it? - Yeah, it was crazy. - Hey, sorry, Seth, can we stop? That was a big laugh at the end of that first surgery. - Ah, you right, take a bath. - A little pause in the night. - Again, I'm a huge fan of it, Andy. - All right, sorry, I'm sorry, yeah, I'll play it. - All right, let's play. - Seth's y'all. - So you're just thinking about it? There you go. You look dazzling. - dazzling. - Jenny. - The wind is back. (upbeat music) - The best season of "Lenny Pegasus" - This might be some of my favorite dancing ever done on the show. - Jenny got crazy. (laughing) - That's like, she looks like a car salesman balloon guy. - Yeah, it's very good, a very nice work with what she's given by Jenny Slate and it's a shark. - Also that moves pretty fast, that beat. - It beat. - Totally. - Yeah, now it's gaining momentum. That's what helped that one. - Now we are in, if you wanna know what Steve Higgins office looks like. - He looks like everybody on 17. - Just like this. - We are in it right now. It is Cedacus as a therapist and Andy in a couch. We know right away. - This is therapist stuff. And here we go. - Is that it you? - I know it sounds crazy, but I'm starting to genuinely believe I've been cursed by a homeless man. - How do you mean? - Well, I broke this trinket and now every time I feel a gust of wind, this crazy, sexy sacks guy comes bursting through the wall. - So these are daydreams? - No, I think it's actually happening. Oh no. Oh no, not again. Sorry, it was a little stuffy in here. I thought you give the window a crack No problem, so where were Good stretchham that like your stretch over Andy's face to like really get your crotch in there as fucking wonderful I think it's explodes and becomes your explodes into so Jenny is there somehow again that Crotch in the face move is to be repeated on the hundreds correct. Yes. Yeah, the beat the beat got our face full of crotch The nice thing about how this is structured is we have hit rule of three's so I think that kind of the your guards down a little bit now and also a cool a man cool a man and then sit eggs explodes very nice height in there Jenny comes back from beat two to join the dancing beat three and now we're back We're fully into plot right now would you know I like it's got the it's got the drive and momentum of a 70s thriller at this point Yeah, it's the parallax view. Yes Can I can I also mention that just because we did to have a different director and Chrysler was really good at doing his own effects, and I remember actually being kind of excited that I was like Oh these are kind of new stupid effects But he was really good at actually like doing his own. I mean did a shitload of like after this look at this shot right here This is a little dutch angle. It's you know, it's got a lot of something else going on velocity to it It's there's it's a dare I say Hitchcockian? Yeah, you can say it It's like I said the velocity is is ramping up. All right, here we go Please you have to make it stop you made your choice you would not pay a pay anything please just lift the curse all right I will help you take this Mend it hang it over your bed. Keep it safe. It will protect you from the curse forever. I will. I will thank you. Thank you Five years later. That was great like all right, so the fact that that happens simultaneously as was great really good for it for a moment Clearly five years later because you're wearing glasses. Yeah, totally different guy. He's nice now. Yeah, you're nice You don't sweep your hair back anymore Rump old hair. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, wig is your wife You didn't end up with Jenny. I think we're all happy about that. Yeah, it worked out based on based on how she reacted to Sarah Jo Jenny was not the one for you. Yeah, I think that's really was ready to pitch you over the side and And again, I don't think anybody anybody is ahead of this at this point in the audience. No, which is really joyful Hey, hang on honey. You're doing great nurse ready to burn the room That's it. You're doing great. Just hang in there. I love you. I love you - oh By the way, I'm earlier today. I accidentally knocked your good luck trinket out of the floor. I Didn't know that it fell and I just stepped on it really really hard and I broke it I think you just have more Greece than you know It's like in grade By the way, it's 345. Yeah, it's really not that long. No, not for the storytelling that you pack in I remember it being much longer You think it's long because you can't believe it's it's so much story Genuine it's cutting very fast. Well, that's what I said you guys you guys are tremendous at the economy of storytelling You get right to the next beat to the next beat and the the the pace and the internal velocity ramp up I mean, it's it really does start kind of deliberate. You get all the story like Sess said you want in 40 seconds and then it runs So the really nice thing is she tells you she broke your good luck thing Then she holds it up because of course she's delivering a baby, but she also brought it out and she brought it with her In her pocket then we hear the sound cue the wind starts going through Andy's hair again Andy's the only person the only character in the scene who knows something's about to happen you're looking around at the wall We all are usually where he comes from unless he explodes the therapist and instead he comes out from between Wiggs legs just like covered And just I don't know Jacinta. Yeah, yeah, I mean, you know, you just even sex clear. It's just clear gel clear gel And then what I like is everybody reacts the way they would yeah in the way the first beat like everybody's like Oh, what's going on here now? It's a full fucking horror movie. Yeah, we're a movie wig passes out Haters creams and then we have one of my favorite anti-faces. I mean just Horse mouth open sob Yeah, horse mouth open sob is a very good way HMO first and not the last. You're very good at naming your own facial Chrysel Chrysel came over. He's like can you give me a little more horse mouth open sob? I got you. Yeah, you want a wide angle lens? Let's fucking dance. You want 20% more This was one of the places though where I was really really really cold. Yeah, I should say so I remember you saying it at the time Yeah, like let's let's let's quick sticks on this one because I'm freezing I'm so cold right now. I mean it was a fucking perfect perfect take. I just want to jump in real quick Because it's like such a cool short and it's so funny like how much John wants to hammer home how cold it was I relate to this if we were talking about certain things. I've done that I have to point out how cold I was Yeah, which is many times Seth as you know. Yeah. Yeah. No, I got it. Yeah So I remember being on the floor watching this air and being like this is going pretty good And then when it got to that last scene in the in the delivery room and he comes out I remember being like oh, we did good because the audience goes fucking insane on that moment And I remember being like I'm so happy that we were able to do one that got this level of reaction. Yes Where did it air something the rundown? Hi early. It was like kind of the early. Yeah, it was the first pre-tap It was the Lauren likes it digital shorts yeah, I'm just saying we know the difference. Yeah I also just want to give credit to how nice a piece of writing it is that John Buttoned each beat by saying Sarah Jeter the camera. Uh, it's a funny way for every beat to end And it's the perfect ending for the whole piece. Yeah, it's a great idea It took me a long time to get the timing right of that too because you guys were always like it's got to look and say it And I was always seeing it when I was looking at it. I wasn't doing it right. Well, you were so cold You were so cold and you were out of breath. I was so cold. I couldn't do it. I just wasn't getting it right And I get frustrated when I don't get anything right on like the third take. I'm like god And I do my stupid like what is this? Why am I not doing it right? Well, especially if you're covered in slime I have no memory of that John, but uh, but you did nail it whenever whatever we got Yeah, they only use the good ones so think uh, yeah So this came right out of uh, uh, don't make me sing. Oh wow And so no commercial break and that's just you know, look you can't have a better act in SNL history Then don't make me sing into the crash. I think you could, but it's still good. It's a good one. I'm sorry That's that's impeachably great. You can't you can have one's as good, but I don't think you have a better act Maybe maybe unimpeachably great, but okay. Yeah, it's some peach. It's got some peach on it I have a question for both uh ham and and and this is an actor question Because obviously you guys have been in the edits. You've been in edit rooms, especially you Andy Obviously, but but you and him as well Uh, do you ever because you know how much fucking time an editor is gonna be looking at your face whether it's a movie or TV show Do you ever look at the camera and actually say anything like Tiffany had as she used to do this thing where she would turn to the camera and just go Hey, Mr Edit them make me look good, but do you guys ever talk to the editor because you know they're gonna be looking at your face First of all, I'm so glad that that question had a name drop in the middle of it. Um, no Secondly, yes But more like on something like Brooklyn 99 where I I knew them actually yeah, so and then I would be like sorry Doug I would you say like uh don't use that I would be like I'm so sorry Courtney Like if I was fucking up or something like yeah Or I'd be like definitely use that take Courtney you have to use that And I'll be so pissed and I'll come down to your bungalow No, I've never done that uh, I've never been like uh, I guess confident enough to have that conversation But uh, yeah, well just know that people look at your face for like I guess you should do fucking months on it You heard it here first everyone. I in one small way and more confident than John ham Let's hear the voice down. All right, let's do it. What's up guys? It's Akiva Quaid army big fan love the pod John ham so sorry to miss you Your flesh is the best flesh. Okay, let's get into this. So I'm in LA I'm working on writing with Spicer, Winkler and Jonah Hill And I am having the weird experience of some sorts that I have nothing to do with being on tv for the first time So it just feels a little a little weird to me And this one is arguably the best one that you guys day without me and And it's really good and it's very funny and with all that said, I remember having some issues with the filmmaking and I love Chrysel, but an Andy remembers it as I'm sure he's talked about already or is about to and I'm sure I didn't behave the way you should, which would just be unbridled positivity and keep my opinions to myself, but I apparently couldn't help myself and for that, I apologize and I just rewatched it expecting not to be able to know what bothered me, but it actually was glaringly obvious about what bothered me and it's all nitpicky filmmaking stuff. It is not about the comedy or the performances or that it plays and is great. That's nice. Okay, at one minute and three seconds in, you jump the eyeline. So this is Sergio has just broken through the wall of the business room, the board room and Andy is in wide and he looks right to left where the smoke cloud is coming in to the foreground. Then it goes to Andy's close up and now he's looking left to right. Then it cuts back to Sergio and Sergio is on the far right of the frame, which just even further disorients me. Then when it cuts to the board members, they're looking in the right direction, ish, but it's vague rather than like cleanly set up where you know where everybody is in the geography like in, let's look at like a, in our rain wheels and business meeting one or something where you know exactly where the things are. And so I just found it distracting because I'm a stickler for eyelines working. Then at the end of it, Andy's like, "Marcy, Steve," and it's back to the correct eyeline there. So at this point, I just know we're not in control. This wasn't a choice. Sometimes we will break the eyeline on purpose to disorient you in like a horror way or in a, I don't know, recommend a dream or something. I don't know, but this is not on purpose. So this is where now we're in uncharted water here. These are not reliable filmmakers. These people don't know what they're doing. That's what I know. Then in the Jenny Slate date scene, again, we've set up the wine pouring shot on one side of the scene, setting up that that's the side we're on and that's where the eyeline will be. Then when Sergio comes in through the wall, that's fine. It's the two-shot he goes from the back kind of resetting what side we might be on. Then it goes to the two-shot of you and Jenny were on the other side totally disorienting me. Then Jenny gets up, exits frame left, and when she returns, she enters the same frame left on the reverse of Sergio, making it seem like she's jumped over to the other side of the Sergio, which is just, there's no excuse for this. This is not on purpose. This is just sloppy and wrong. Then my last thing, I'll just leave a pause here for a moment to be mad at me. The reason I disagree with this is because there's fantasy involved. That's the reason why. Yes. That's fair. It's a good sketch again, like I said. Give us your last one, Keith, and your voice now. Then the color correction. The cameras at that time, and sometimes the Alexis still does this, or maybe it was the red, I forget it was the red. But they gave everything kind of this yellow, jaundiced look where everything's washed out and has this beige over it that I recognize as very flat. You have to do a little work in color correction to pull that away to get rid of that shit so that it looks like a finished piece of work. This just looks like raw footage to me. So it kind of looked unfinished and amatory. Anyways, love your crystal. Yeah, sure. And I know the quads are going to agree with me on this one because there was one comment on the last video that said, I like it when Keith nerds out. So take that. Anyways, love you guys. Love the pod. Love everything you do. Later Arnold. Lay the quail, no, you want to end the show there. Cool. Which is a great way to end it. But here's the reason that that voice note gives me a little bit of PTSD is because I remember while I was trying to edit my grubber, Keith calling me and complaining and being like, what are you doing? You've got to get over there. And like, like you being very upset that I wasn't taking charge. You're seeing the curse air? No, this was like during the week. He was really nervous about it. And then I remember him like, like we were sending him edits as it was going. And he was like, I can't remember how it worked. But like, I just remember the feeling of that guilt of like, I want to end this movie. And he was like, what are you doing? Like, here's what I'll say. It's all born. Keith, I love you. We love you. Yeah, it's of course. Obviously that's. And you're of course right. Of course. Well, I don't know. We need Chrysler to chime in, honestly, because there's an art. It seemed like his problem was consistent in terms of breaking the line that could have been a choice that Chrysler was making. I don't know that it was. I agree with that. It was only like one in the Jenny Slade beat that I was like, but like, but to me, like the moment a guy comes through the walls, like I'm like, I'm fine. Yeah. It kind of goes. Now it's like, are we now in Sergio world where you break the line on purpose to disorient people? Yes. But that's a choice. And I will only say that I, I don't like it now. You don't like the short anymore? Yeah. You completely want to. You got Keith, brother. I got Keith. You got straight up Keith. All right, let equates. Never let Keith tell you what he thinks about your wife, because your life will end. I'm not, he I'm not talking about me. I'm still the other of my wife, because he likes her. Otherwise, if he didn't, we wouldn't be together. I'm so sorry. I mean, I'm glad he made his speech and are winning. Oh, it was true. We all know true. I'm so fucked. I remember he he was that he was at dinner once with Alexi and he kept complaining because she would leave the table and then come back in from the other side, exactly, which is just disorienting. He didn't know where to look. Yeah, I didn't know where to look. I feel like your wife breaks the line a lot. Well, I think we have to release the Keith cut. I think he's got to take another pass at this flip a few, you know, yeah, flip a few negs and color time it to his satisfaction. And we'll run side by side. We'll see if it's better or worse. So it's not amateur. Here's here's my very generous takeaway. Keve cares a lot. And this is something we all built together. And even though it was his choice to completely fucking abandon me and go work on a movie, he's never came out, which never came out. So we're not his fault, but still so we're not just a vacation in LA for him. So I understand the feeling of like, I want to do both things. I want to be there. This is the thing we built together. This is also my legacy. I want to make sure it's how I would want it to be. I have all those feelings about things when the issue is on the other foot. Is that how you say it when it's the other way around is probably clear. But yeah, I don't know. I don't know that anyone else has ever cared about the things that he just noted, but hit us in the tittest. I'd be curious. Well, can I add on to that too? Is that in addition to what Andy just said, I've learned to be a more meticulous person, not even director meticulous person, which I'm still not like, but both me and Andy, but both me and Eddie, like, I think learned how to be better filmmakers through. I've already referenced the latter or else I would jump in and you can write like, I'm fine with that. I'm very confident. I think you're just differently meticulous. If I can say that, yeah, borderline tongue twister, differently meticulous and ridiculous. Tell the funky homo sapien. Your rap name was Rick meticulous. Rick meticulous. That's right. You remember a rith meticulous, Rick meticulously differently meticulous, a rith meticulous. Okay. So, but yes, Jorman, I absolutely agree. I'm so much better at editing because of Akiva and writing all the things. He's our guy. We learned from him. He learned from us. We did it all together. It's beautiful. That said, shut up, bro. And I will say, the SNL digital short logo was a point of pride and that that is part of it. What goes in there has to have a certain. Yes. Yes. Yeah. It's very funny that I mean, and I know that's very real and you were not saying that it's a joke at all because it is the as we've established, it's like the flatest opening logo. You guys are boring. Do not let that flag touch the ground generic. There's three people who for sure know that it means that it's us and it's us. Yeah. There you go. But if we talk about it a lot on this podcast, I think. Yeah, hopefully more people don't know. So all of that, I mean, for me when he had his issues, I was like, it's the reason that I wanted to bring up how it felt on the floor watching it air that pride I felt of having pulled one off with neither of them there. And to get that reaction from the audience and to do right by ham and to like, have done it with chrysal, who I was really just starting to work with, I was like, fuck, man. I feel like we just did really good. I was so happy at the after party. And you being sick, you being very sick and very tired and me being very cool. Yeah. Don't forget about how chilly ham was. And Andy, were you like, fuck those guys? Kind of like you're just like, no, I don't need those guys at all. I just assumed he was right and it was bad in a way. I didn't understand. Then you hung up, you hung up the phone and you made the same horse face that you made at the end of Sergio, right? Get the wide angle, man. Stereo gilly of me. Maybe he's right. Mostly when you when you sit with these things too, there is a lesson to learn of like if anybody's trying to make films for the first time is like, sometimes those mistakes are egregious and sometimes you can live with them. Yeah. You know, it's they're not always, you know, because we've all been on set shooting something and it's like, well, we could get it from over here, but we'd kind of be jumping online and it's like, well, there's a time and a place where you can do that that's not going to completely pull somebody out of the scene. And I think that's a good lesson to learn too. It's also - Yes, you know, sometimes it's not too bad. - Yep, yep, I know. - I did ask Christy. for voice nobody hasn't had time to get one to us yet but maybe for next time I would love to hear what he has to say about it. I mean he's got to hear keys and then just shots fired. Well get to white but I asked Fortate for a voice note that he said he would have no problem getting by 4 p.m. and it's almost eight. Was he talking about West Coast though maybe Hawaiian time? No he's out he's he's got. He's right on. Yeah was this was this closet organizer? Yeah so again. God damn. This is how good this show is. Every time I hear from him he references that sketch. We refer to each other by our names so no. So wait before we move on. Okay please Seth, Yoram. Yeah. Cam it's a little loaded for you is the curse criterion. 100% no hesitation. I mean I think so. No hesitation and I think anything that not anything that made it into the 100 digital short but like there's a reason it's in the 100th digital short. Yes. Agreed. Also I was around even though I wasn't like hosting anything but I was around when the tournament happened. I think I filled out a bracket and I'm sure it went pretty far in the bracket. It was in there. Yeah for sure. I would be surprised if it didn't make the sweet 16th 16th final final 16 if not eight. I think it was it went pretty far but also it just felt like it kind of had it you know Sergio was kind of kept going as a as a thing people you know whatever I had life in its own. Agreed and I heard about it a lot after as well. I mean him you've had some pretty amazingly sticky characters with that Don Draper guy. Like we're like with with Sergio. How do you get both just our eyes rolled out of our skull? What are you talking about? Why? He said sticky and it's sticky. Why are you suddenly trying to be like a normal host? I'm a shock shock like the shock shock shock. They have different kinds of modes. I have a list of questions for this. Did you prepare your sticky care routine? My question is how often do people reference Sergio on the strut a lot lots a lot a lot a lot a lot you know especially you know in the couple what you said this was 2010 yeah yeah yeah I mean this January 2010 it had a good run of people like coming up to be on the street and you know Sergio. And follow up how many of them bring up the jumping the line. Sergio you fucked it up and on on second minute one of the three. What's up with the color correction though. Hey Sergio you're a great sex guy but a shitty film maker. Sergio does it break your heart. Does it break your heart up close to K. Sergio you're so close to it then you fucked it. I was sure you did. Why are you so washed out. I didn't recognize you. I thought you were Sergio but your colors not fucked up. Oh my god. All right can we can we jump on then Andy? Well I had some more sincere stuff to say. Let's move on. Well okay I just want to pick up. What's up dude? I'm okay thank you. My son came in with two things which was he told me to stop yelling and ask me if I wanted a beef steak. He's a good dude. Okay and sure. Yeah I'm sorry and stop yelling do you want a beef steak. Okay so this just this just time stamps where we are in the world. The next sketch you play Scott Brown. Oh boy yeah. Conte Senator. New Senator. That was a fun one too. Then we have Michael Buble Sings his first song and then update then Greg is not an alien for the second time. Yeah that's built as the sports anchors definitely alien. Oh god I forgot about those. Greg is definitely an alien. He was definitely. Keenan is a as a host of a sports show. First time caller a long time listener which is wanted to say Greg is definitely an alien. Yeah the whole sketch. Hello and welcome to another edition of Game Time with Randy and Greg. You'll one stop shop for sports talk. I'm former NFL running back Randy Dukes and with me as always is my co-host Greg. Greg is not an alien and today we're going to be talking about. It's great. Really funny. I also feel like was this before or after I feel like this was had been kind of done or maybe it was we did it first this one did it first anyway was where there was the multiplicity thing happening. Yeah this was. They did it with the Falconer. Yes that was Falconer was first but this was the I think the second Greg's an alien and yes you started multiplying. So I think Michael Bryan shows up. Brian Tucker shows up as an alien. All dressed like Greg. Yeah. Do you remember who you play in this sketch John? Stan Van Gundy do I play I play coach? You play Frank Reich the coach of the coach of the bills a coach who gets attacked by Greg and then returns to the show as an alien. Yeah. Then we're off into a Sess Corner. Neworms sing us in real quick. Sess Corner. Here's the part of the show that Sess talks about what he did that week. You know what? I'm going to come right back at you and say like here's another this is a maybe even more impressive. This is a three sketch act that I put up against anything. Ham and Bubley is the next sketch which is John Ham and Michael Bubley have opened a ham and a champagne restaurant. I get a lot of that one man. That was a good one. Is it called Ham and Bubley or Ham and Bubley? No it's Ham and Bubley and then John is a very menacing guy and over the course of the sketch you realize that he's kidnapped Michael Bubley and he insists and Michael does try to say it's actually pronounced Bubley and he's like and John like very menacingly says that's not. No no no no it's Bubley. His eyes went black and he smacked my face. And he sings songs he's singing and every time it's like I know what you're thinking and I agree this is a bad idea for a restaurant. Oh no he's coming back when I get a chance I'll explain how he came to this. This is the John Ham's John Ham unofficial sequel. Yes. Yes. Also Michael Bubley was not at the table. I didn't we all know I can't sing and I had to sing the Michael Bubley part at the table read on Wednesday. Hey, made the show. Not great. I remember today because maybe laughing so hard he was choking but it made the show. Made the show. I was going to say today because what it died to do the Bubley parts. I know but I couldn't well I was very worried about this getting the sketch in of the jokes right at the table. I knew I could sing the jokes. Fair fair fair. Well not a thing. But the thing I had forgotten was at one point John says like the deal now is a and if you like entertainment with your meal you're in luck. Every night at Ham and Bubley Mr. Michael Bubley will perform two shows. In the 8 p.m. show Michael is a ventriloquist. At 11 p.m. he does a one man show about William Falker. Don't you think it would just be better if I sang in the shows? Excuse me. That sound means another delicious ham is ready. And then Michael Bubley like goes wouldn't it be better if I just sang and you just like stare at him? It's really great. All right then we go into Closet Organa this year which is a pre-tap and again in order to get a three-sketch act you need a pre-tap in the middle. So it's a late night television ad for a Closet Organizer. It's exceptional work by Sidacus only doing the voice over because like hey it's a Closet Organizer. It's just a really funny dumb voice and it's basically will forte dressed in a blue bodysuit standing in a closet and he organized your closet and then there just people keep off camera you never see anybody are throwing things at him and he's organizing him to the closet but he immediately isn't catching them and it's just a mess. The idea is that you throw things at this person who lives in your closet and he puts them away neatly for you. He's your closet organizer but it immediately goes off for us. Blue Spandex suit. Yeah. Blue Spandex suit with a head covering. Perfect for today. He's a blue, he's a blue shape. I want to make sure I think all you need to give him is a little bit of food and water and a bucket for him to do his business in. And then it cuts to him. His pants are still on but he's squatting over a bucket. It's a lot of water. Like some of the things in the Closet Organizer water just for the joy of seeing him splash with water. Marbles and then at the end it goes pies, pies, pies, pies. And he just keeps getting his pies. This is pure forte solemn. One thousand percent John and God damn it John and Will. Will is very good physically. It's so fun. And again I reached out to them and they were they said oh my god definitely when you need it by and it's four hours past then. But let's just watch it. Yeah. Yeah. Weren't there three pieces of it? Two. Only two. There were three pieces of finger and butts. Excuse me? Does this happen to you? Is your closet an absolute mess? Are you way too stupid to keep your closet clean? Introducing the new Zipco Closet Organizer, great for shoes, sweaters, belts, hats, parcels, jeans, underwear, socks, socks. That's a very fortitude. Blackets, plants, trophies, marble, oh bucks, additional water, lose peanut butter, pie, pie, pie, pie, pie, pie. He pockets the underwear. He pockets the underwear right out of the gate. Oh god damn it. There's more to say about that. But first then we go to the third of this hat trick is Fred's stenographer character, a lid. Oh my god. Oh crackers. Maybe it was and golden. I mean, it's an and golden episode. Yeah, this is a killer, man. Um, it made me laugh so hard. And again, it's like it from a bygone era, this Fred character. It's also the most Fred and James Anderson sketch. I think it was I was asking you this set because did he do another version of this or did he do this? Yes, I think it's the second one of these. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. That's what it thought. Um, because I remember there was one where he couldn't find his chapstick and then another this one time you can't find his crackers. I'm not we're not going to watch all of it, but I would just like to watch just the beginning of this sketch because the fun of like the Fred reveal also takes his time. Thank you, Mrs. Shanklin. Your witness. So Mrs. Shanklin on the night Mr. Green was murdered. You saw a suspicious vehicle. I did. Can you describe this vehicle? I remember it very clearly. It was a white Ford S court with a dent in the driver's side door. Oh, it's a sketch from it's a sketch from 50 years ago. It's like it's like it would not have been out of place on your show of show. Yeah, but it's like it's too big for Carol Burnett. Yeah. And it's not it's a completely different world. And there's no notes have been given to any other performers to do anything differently. Is there any way you can type more quietly? It's not me. It's the machine. Why are you using a typewriter instead of a set a graph? I don't know how to do that. I'll be fine. I'll be fine. This is this just and then this part is something that my wife and I still say all the time. I can't find my crackers. Yeah, I can't find my crack. By the way, being in a sketch with Fred 101 without breaking do not make eye contact with that. Well, you're done. Wow. Then there's this weird like just the most James writing that comes out of nowhere because you go and you address keen in the judge. And this is also does not fit in the sketch at all, but it delights me. Excuse me. Sorry. Your honor. Is there something we can do about the court stenographer? Do you have an issue with the Linda? I don't want to say that she's bad at her job, but she's typing what we're saying right now. Listen, no one is good at their job. I mean, you're not a good lawyer. I'm not a good judge. I mean, it's jury doesn't look like they know what they're doing. But who cares? We're just figuring out if people go to jail or not. Anyway, it's again, it's perfect act. And now like you think at this point, there's not more you can ask about the show. Also, I want to say that we've come into we're not living in this world, right? When you when the response to somebody being terrible at their job is, listen, no one's good at their job. This is the world where it's very very ahead of its time. We've come all the way around to actually living in a Linda's world. I mean, specifically deciding if people go to jail, it was prophetic. Is there not a second closet organizer piece? Yeah. And we're going to watch it. I'm so sorry. But this is again, you had a plan and I fucked it. No, this was the exact plan. But at this point, again, this show does not need anything else to make it a perfect show. And yet we have this coming. And this was the five to one. Yeah. God damn it. I love them. John's sitting alone at a bar. Will enters. Yeah, Jen and Tonic, please. Jen and Tonic, on the way. Jen and Tonic, hell of a drink. Yeah, I'm not gay. I'm not either broke. Cheers. Sorry, just a long day. None taken. Yeah, I didn't say no offense. None taken. That is the most forte and solemn reminder. To have somebody say none taken. Without anybody saying no offense. Like being in a writer's room with them. There's more to come. You look familiar. Do I know you from somewhere? I don't know. Probably not. Where'd you go to high school? Salt Lake City. Pleasant Valley Beavers. No. I'm from Israel. Jerusalem Tigers. By the way, as a as a 10 to one or everything that's happened so far is perfectly fine. And again, at the table, when you're listening to this table, you're like, oh, this is one of those forte pieces. Yeah. That's going to be about two people talking weird. And I'm here for it. And it's going to be the use of language like we've never heard before and moves like that. But there's more. Yes, not then. No, I know you from somewhere. Are you on TV? No, I'm on a bar stool. That's a really good joke. So no, seriously. How do I know you? Wait a second. You're the freaking closet organizer guy, aren't you? Oh, God, that's you, right? From the commercial, the blue suit. That's me. Yeah, your hair kind of threw me. Not wearing the head. I can't believe I'm talking to the closet organizer. I have a name, actually. Oh, God, I'm sorry. All right. Before we get to the names, four-taste performance as a guy who gets this all the time is just marvelous. I'm not just blowing smoke. I'm buying ham's performance as well. Hold on. Can I just show this is my mom trying not to be seen? She's crawling on the floor. So she's not seen. Just get on here. You know, these people. Hi. Hi. You know Seth and John Hammond. We're having an argument on whether your Ms. Nike sweatpants are 100% cotton. So I have to what? I get it. I get it. Yeah. We've all been there. We've all been in that exact situation. Hundreds of times. With your arm. She's 74. She was crawling on the floor so she wouldn't be seen in the butt. She's rubbing it in your face, how mobile she is. I like that even she can't believe we don't have video on our podcast. Yep. All right. So John mentioned earlier, he alluded to the fact that we're about to hear two of the greatest sketch names of all time. Oh, God, I'm sorry. Tarky. Tarky Fencington. Tarky Fencington. Tarky Fencington. Resident Boner. It's real honor. Real honor. Man. Now I know you probably get this all the time, but would you mind doing a little bit for me? I don't know. I mean, ah, come on. Please. Fine. Okay. Socks. Armels. All right. That's so awesome. Oh, my God. Thank you. Oh, man. Hey. What are you doing right now? You want to head over to my place and maybe watch the office or something? Oh, come on. It'll be fun. We could order pizza, drink some beer. It'll be fun. Okay. Maybe. Yeah. You know, play some video games. You know, maybe after you could help me organize my closet. There it is. Thanks, Resident. What? I'm not going to help you organize your closet. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. I was joking. Well, it wasn't funny. I'm sorry. Yeah. You are sorry. Because you don't know what it's like to be me, okay? If you're talking to someone who tries to buy you a drink or wants to be your friend or wants to make love to you, you have to ask yourself, are they doing this? Because you're Tarky Benzington? Or because you're. Eyes. Socks. Marbles. I had no idea. Yeah. No, you didn't. Goodbye, Resident. I hope you died in it. Hey, was that the closet organizer guy? No, that was Tarky. Yeah, that was the closet. This. Tarky Benzington. I mean, I think in the same way, I do feel like this had the same fun of the end of the curse, which is like the audience was so appreciative of the amount of structural integrity of these two things. There was a big laugh when it's revealed. And it's such a, right? It's such an edifying laugh of like, "Oh, it's very fun when the show does things like this, where it references itself within the episode." Yeah. Sorry. Is your last name? Your name is Resden Bonair. Bonair. Bonair. Is it? Bonair. Can you do in it? Just clarify. Great writing. The Jerusalem Tigers. We're wrapping it up, guys. This is good. Oh, I just want to say real quick, little housekeeping. Kenward and Joost wrote the weird L. I want to make sure Kenward also gets credit for that impenetrable sketch. Oh, the hey kids are heading down to Shay. Yeah. Oh, nice. Thank you for cleaning that up. A very nice note about pod. Congrats on the enormity of your success. Yorm and the gang, which is what my cousin calls this podcast for some reason. Nice, my character. My character has been rising to the ranks, guys. - Oh my God, I'm in your head. - Andy, I'm wondering what you think about this comic, 'cause I think there's some truth to it. Keve organizing a special screening of Way of Water, but also not remembering the Sigourney Weaver was in the first movie is a real distillation of avatars overall place in the culture. - Oh wow, that's a-- - I mean, I really think that really resonated with me. - Really? - I think a lot of people would agree with that. - Yeah. - I happen to not be one of them, but I can't deny anyone else's experience of which I've been told about many. - I don't know. Keve not remembering that to me has been the biggest shock of this entire podcast that he didn't remember that. And you know what, I want to say, guys. John, you've had such sticky characters. - Oh, boy. - Okay, fine, no one wants to hear me. I'm the most popular character on the pod, guys. - Now-- - It's me being on your movie gang, guys. I've been enjoying it. - When Matt Winer pitched it to you, was he like, "This character's sticky." - "Dream of sticky." - "You got me, baby, you're gonna wanna be in this show." - Johnny, hey, the last thing I wanted to say that I've totally forgot was when I went, when I was back at SNL, I was hanging out with the writers, and I was hanging out with a lot of the young writers. A bunch of them said this podcast was more helpful in telling them how the show worked than anything anybody at the show has told them. - Is that true? (laughing) - Well, hello, everyone, we love you. - Yeah, we love you, guys. - Thanks for listening. - Wait, hey, we got you here. Anything else that you remember from that week, anything you wanna bless us with about your SNL experience? - Other than just how, it was not the usual being terrified that you had no, 'cause like you said, nobody really tells you what you're just supposed to follow along kind of blindly. So I at least had a template of what I kind of thought might happen, and then I knew I was gonna, I was happy that I was getting all the opportunities to do so many great sketches, and as everybody knows, like, you know, table is five hours long, and it was a long table. It was jam packed with awesome stuff, and it was hard to pick the show, but it was so fun, and it just, it was great to come back, and it was so fun that I came back, I think in the same calendar year, which was even more fun, and we tried to get some more stuff in it. - And did you hook up with anyone? - Yeah, did you hit that? - No. - Do you have a question anyone in the cast? - Eddie, you got me sick. You got me sick when we mouthed. - While we're on the subject, Seth, I still think it's fucked out whenever I fucked up. - I did, too. - I remember him just kept saying he was too cold to hook up that week, so don't get on call. - He's way too chilly. I'm so sorry. - Don't get on me. I'm too greasy. - You're lovely. I'm just so chilly. - The bill is my ham. - Just hold me. - I think that John and Will wrote that cause of the organizer, the last act of the cause of the organizer, as a comment on how difficult it was to beat Don Draper in the world. That's what I'll all say, you know? - Yeah, yeah. - That's the meta of it all. - You'd been on the other side of that a lot of times. - Yeah, it made sense to me. I got it. - You got it. - Your performance was based in reality. Yeah, true experience. - I'd say this with no exaggeration. John Hamm, you were in a golden host from An Golden Era. - I loved it. It was so fun. It's still fun. It only took me 15 years to get back on it, but man, it was fun. - It was fun. - It was fun when you were back in the movie. - Oh my God, you were a killer on it. - Woo, wee. - But I think every era of show has, it's like a go-to host, and we were so lucky that we overlap to do. - Well, that's kind of you to say. - And Seth, you watched the last episode. What was your least favorite sketch of this whole episode? - Of the last episode that just aired. Sabrina Carpenter, least favorite sketch. (laughing) - To tell. - Now that we know all the writers are listening. - You want to add this as a thing every week? - We all know how hard it is to work there, but we don't like it work there no more, dude. Let's shit on it, right? - Dish. - Do it. - And then we'll cut it out, and we'll, and everyone won't do what it was. - Yeah, just believe it, Seth. All right, Jellot. (laughing) All right, let's get out of here. Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait, sorry. Andy, theme song. ♪ Falling bee ♪ (laughing) ♪ Falling bee ♪ Andy, what'd you do in the bee today? - I got Motherfucking Queen bee clean. - All right. (whistling) - Thanks for listening, guys. - I want you to hear this criticism. It's very stressful. You and I share a bee's every day. You're way better than me. And like when I tell you, and I'm honest with you, about the words I miss, you're always like, "Oh, fuck, you must be so fucking bummed." You're just not, you know what you are? You're keave about the curse with me about the bee. - No, but it's because I know you can do better. - Is that Keith too? - Yeah. - Is that what he thinks when he says mean things? - Kind of. - Anyway, congrats on the bee. All right, let's try it one more time. - So it's, you got clean bee is what you got. - I got clean bee. - Quimmy. - Oh, yeah. - And I missed a yawned. And what else did I miss? It was something else dumb. Oh, do me. - Come on. - Like the belp of the bowstone? - Yeah, do me. - Do me. - Baby. - It's the belp of the- - Do me. - Do me. - It was Motown Philly on it today. - Yeah, I got into web series 'cause those guys were so great. - We've now entered Shaggy Tale. - God damn it. - Shaggy Tale. - Or good. - I'm like, "Shaggy Tales" and I can't not lie. (laughing) - I remember. - All right, love you guys. - Love you guys. - Love you, buddy. - Later Arnold. - Later quates. - Son of a bitch stole my line.