The Council Of Distractible (Part 3)

Good evening, gentle listeners or watchers and welcome to Destractable! This fifth birthday episode, Warhead in Wade refuses reporting his sex life and violates amendments. Their ping-bomb buys James a Jeep, raises Robotnik, thinks of the future and proposes splashing the cash. Man for Mark's puppy goes side-borg, he struggles with sheet, fax changes and wants bounty hunting. From trapped gases, to phallus poltergeisting, it's time for the Council of Destractable. Part 3. Now sit back and prepare to be distracted and enjoy the show. Hello everyone and welcome back to another episode of Destractable! It's been so long since I've hosted I forgot the name of our show. Here I am in the rightful seat at the rightful time to give you all. Mark and Bob doing stuff and me doing nothing, which is what we do even whenever I'm not the host. How are you? I'm about to burm! I didn't know what you were about to do. It's stuck, it's literally stuck, it's stuck. I burped before we started. Oh man, it's stuck right here. Look at my shirt, it's not the Destractable and it's what the bear is getting blown up! You know what helps if you get a burp stuck though? Do you know the technique? What's that? You need to put your elbows in against your ribs. Not like hard, but it's like in and then go tilt side to side because it like squishes your. Are you just making them show off as boobs? No, no, no. Oh, okay. It like shimmies the guests around and then you got to get it out. It's like a baby, you got to work it out. It's not coming out. My sphincters are too strong. No one's got sphincter strengths like me. Maybe you need to heimlich it out. Can you self heimlich? I could, but I won't do it on camera. How high can you climb? I don't want to, I don't want to, I'm embarrassed. Well, I guess it just has to be an adult. Exciting announcement. This episode, I believe, if I did my math correctly, which I oftentimes do not, should come out one day after our five-year anniversary of Destractable hence the shirts Bob and I are wearing. Here here! Eh! Editors, transform a gum into a shirt, look at all this. Shit. Kewa, aw, that is. Yeah, that doesn't mean we're going to do anything any differently. We're still going to do things in normal way, which means we start with small talk. Woo, small talk. Yeah. Anything new? Yes, many, many things, many things are new. Any of them good? No. *laughs* What the fuck? It is fucking falling apart. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, man. *laughs* What have I done? Oh, fuck, I hope this isn't another bad email. *laughs* Oh, god, it's so locked. It doesn't, your phone never do that. I was like, "I don't like your face anymore. I'm not opening for you." Oh, all the time. I hold it up not perfectly vertically and it's like sideways. Yeah, you look different. I don't know if our phones ever go through and like adjust to our aging process, but like my phone over the years has had to take me from looking like that to this. So I don't know how my phone even knows who I am. Could any bald guy just get into my phone? Probably, actually. Yeah. Like, how does it know I'm me? Still. Science. I'll get into my, uh, I just actually got, like, that was a good Texas from Amy saying that, uh, Sandy's leg appointment has been scheduled for her new leg! Nice! That's not how that works. Robotic leg? No, it's a consultation to see what to do. So we've taken to her few appointments because if you, if people don't know, Sandy's are new pup from Ty Street Paws in Songcloud, Thailand. That's not the, how you pronounce it? But it wasn't offensive. It's pronounced "Thyland." Which part did you pronounce? I thought I really had you there. Say it again. I'm the host, man. I'm just gonna mark that down. Editors, make him say it. Make his lips move to him saying it. Anyway, so that's good. It'll be an evaluation to see, uh, because previous consultations said that there is something to be done for the leg. There might be some lingering thing, you know, but the doctors are optimistic about getting mobility back. Not that she isn't really good at moving with three legs. Right now, she's very fast. Um, completely shocked us. Could you be like, she has a limp, but when she's running, she six-bolt of her legs are going to go, "Don't, don't, don't, don't!" And she's very quick. But, uh, yeah, the know that that's good. But the rest of my life is in shambles. But that's, that's at least going well. Yeah, for Sandy. Glad that at least one thing in your life isn't in shambles. I can allude to the rest of it, but it's, it's a complicated situation, because by the time this episode comes out, my video talking about the situation will have been yesterday, but I haven't deduced the correct wordage to be, you know, how brave are you feeling in this small talk? In the time when we are now, you don't know what we will have said, but in the time that we are, then you do will have known what you had said, and you meant it. And I will have let emotions ebb and flow enough to which I could say things logically and reasonably, and right now I want to do anything unreasonable. I want every unreasonable thing possible to exude from my body, every orifice, especially my mouth. Amen at Wade. Wade, you're about to receive all of my unreason. Oh, editors dissolve me. Look at me, if it doesn't. You could have said editors clean me or something. Oh, it's all right. It's been a whole thing trying to get, you know, iron lungs released. That's what it's all about. There's been setbacks, but, you know, also some interesting discoveries that I didn't know, but I just feel like I thought the systems would be more sophisticated. But it turns out like the same kind of tech we're used, we used to figure out the website map, which is what any figured out, which is just a spreadsheet with a bunch of, you know, coordinates. Same thing for movies, just put a bunch of bullshit in a spreadsheet, and you put in there, and that's the only way to get it up. Somebody should show those guys about computing technology. They all look computer shoved over into the AI corner. All the computers reserved for all that. And we're scuzz over here left with spreadsheets and diagrams and bones that we got a roll around. They wonder what rating this movie should be. It's like those dogs that predict playoffs. It's like, wait, does they do that for the movies? Like, which movie should come out? Well, bones went to the left ball, so I guess I had lung asked to wait another month. Oh my god. It's been so long. And it's like, I know everybody, please, I know. It was all explained in the video. They came out yesterday. It was all explained, but I haven't worked. I do a motion. You can. It was all will be explained. You want to know why this drink doesn't have a lid? Mark, you're not drinking it without a lid, are you? Because I dropped it. That's it. That's the first one. Oh, wait, wait, yeah. It fell on the carpet where the all the dog hair is. And I reached out and picked it up like, oh, man. And then I did that thing where you grab a lid and it just squishes through your fingers because it kind of wet because from when I opened it, I just scooted across the floor. And I'm like, oh, it's more dog hair. I just keep grabbing and scooting. That's how I picked it up. It was like half dog hair, so I threw it away. That's my story. Give me some points. Oh, don't worry. You've got some points. Somebody's going to be really confusing later on to read, but I'm sure we'll remember. Oh, well, usually they make so much sense. I have a lot of stuff going on too, okay. My life is very complicated. James got a power wheels. You don't know what power wheels is. It's a car that a toddler can drive. It does little plastic cars. And no, I did not buy it from the store. Yes, I found one that someone was literally trying to like, throw away and rescue it. And man, does it make you feel I literally could not have done less to rescue this thing from the trash. But I still feel like I invented electricity. And James loved it, which was hilarious. Bob is innocent. But like literally it was like, it's all these cars that come with lead acid batteries in them, which wear out and stink. And this one just the battery was dead. But the battery was just soldered into the thing, right? So it's like, I guess you just throw it away. And I was like, well, if I just snip these wires and buy it for $10 on Amazon, a little thing that adapts my RIOB tool batteries into the, because they're 18 volt battery. But boom, literally I cut it. James helped me. I was like, look, bud, look, you put the wires. You stripped the wire. And he was like, uh-huh, uh-huh. When do I drive it? And I was like, we're getting there, man. We'll screw it together, put a battery in. And I was like, please don't burst into flames. God, flicked it on, pushed the gas pedal. And it moved. And literally James started jumping up and down, and just be like, yeah, you did it. And I was like, God, damn it. I'm the best dad that's ever lived. Put the seat on there. And he drove it around for like an hour. And he did this thing. I don't know if all kids do this, but the James has this thing where like, he realizes the same thing over and over again when it's something that's like a prolonged thing he loves that's happening. And he's like sitting in his car just like, driving around the driveway, whatever. And then he just stops and sits for a second. And I'm like, oh, you okay? Yeah. And he's like, I'm driving my Jeep for it. God, damn it. He just keeps re-realizing. He's driving a Jeep around his own driveway and being like, it's great. And it's immediately a problem. Because you have to stop playing with it. that at some point. And so he knows the Jeep exists. And every moment it we're not playing with the Jeep. It's like, Dan, there's a Jeep in the garage. You remember the Jeep? Can we drive it? No, dude. It's eight in the morning. We're not playing Jeep right now. Like to eat your cereal, but very fun, very fun. Whatever that face was was fantastic. It was like the slow realization of an evil mastermind that his plan might actually work. If I'm honest, I was going for Jim Carrey's Grinch smirk. That's pretty on par. That's not kind of an evil mastermind. When it grows real big, artificially, might I say AI of the early 2000s, if we can all say that. Yeah, I generated. I can't believe it. I still love the movie. I'm not gonna say anything critical about Jim Carrey. Have you guys seen the Sonic movies? Only the first one. I want to see the new, apparently there's a fourth one announced now. I haven't seen the movies, but have you seen the dance break that Jim Carrey does with Jim Carrey? I think the third one. Yeah, I have. Yeah. It keeps recommending it to me on YouTube. I haven't watched it. I want to see the movies, but I know it exists. God, it's great. I don't think it spoils anything. It's great. Yeah. Barely, he filmed both parts because it's him and then it's like his dad, older robot and a camera, whatever the hell the story is of the movie, but God, it's good. That man get dance. Plus that song slaps. It's all good. It's a good thing. I keep thinking like I keep hearing things like Jim Carrey's retired. Then it's like new Sonic movie. Jim Carrey will return. It's like, I hope he's I don't want to be back for the fourth one or not, but like I keep hearing he's not doing anymore. And then like he keeps coming back. It's like, yes. Yeah, I think he did it with any make it joke. Like, didn't he retire a while ago? And he was like, I'm not doing movies anymore. I'm done. And then he like came back and did the Sonic movie and was like, I ran out of money. So I'm robotic now. I hadn't seen that. But that wouldn't surprise me. I don't know if that was a joke or a sincere thing. But I swear, I thought I saw that that like he was basically like, well, you need money, turns out they paid me. So I did it. Sorry, there's a important message. Like I said, my sadness depends on it. All right. Great. Come on. Make Mark said, do it. Editors, can we get a description of Mark slowly increasingly sadness face? No, it's helping my sadness. Yeah. Oh, okay. Oh, good. Good. Never mind. I'll describe it then. Less one. Like this, I just keep talking to Amy and we we talked about for it. Like this would have been so much easier if we just made like a Shopify. And I sold an MP4 for like five bucks. Or it would have been a link to an unlisted video on my channel. It's like that's the only thing that I send over is like, if you want to hear it is, that would be shared like wildfire. No, they would never. No, but that's the thing about Mark's Mark's audience, though, is like people would absolutely just get it and immediately start watching it. But if not right away within the first couple days, they'd be like, well, I should go spend them and they would go and they would pay the five bucks or whatever it was just to be like, there. I did it because they're not they're good people and they would not do that. They would not steal because they're so nice. They wouldn't do me like that. I agree that some of them would. They wouldn't none of them would do that. They wouldn't do that. They would them? Well, this isn't them. These assholes might. Some of this is them. No, no, no. This is not them. None of Mark's audience watches this podcast. Some of you is them. There is zero overlap. Markiplier, distractable is no overlap. I'm actually feeling way better about distractable. We're very successful, then. I didn't realize it was so separate. It is. Well, distractable is very successful. Uh-huh. Thanks, Mickey. Calm down, Mickey. He's very very successful. Mickey never lies. I feel proud. Legally unable to lie on the label. But every time we hear Mark do a Mickey, anything a reference Mickey, I just think of the thing. You want to see what's under the gloves, Donald? What a good comic. Haunted me for 14 years. God, penis. Speaking of penis. That's right. That's true. Sagway point. No. Nice try, though. As this is the anniversary episode, I got to give a shout out to one of our Reddit posters. Theater Mom 2016 has made a written out version of the distractable constitution. Which the the accuracy of which we do not endorse, it could be filled with any number of false or misleading statements. But probably it's perfect. There's a whole thread of people offering corrections and amendments and stuff to it in the comments below. So I'm sure it's been corrected in as perfect and exactly what we said and intended. So what we're going to do today for our fifth year anniversary episode is read a really long document together. All right. Yeah. I love document. It's like it's like a legal proceeding. You have to read it out loud word for word. Start to finish. No skipping. No. Oh yeah. I don't I don't want to do that. I'm not going to lie. I don't want to do that. That does not. That does not interest me very much. I want to delete some shit out of this, though. I want to cut some fat. There is no way we have this many rules. It's 10 pages of this. Why is it written double column like this is weird? That the the amendments. Honestly, I think it's stylistic as much as anything. But now that's how we said it. We said it like this. We said it double column. So we don't have to go through and read the whole thing word for word. But I figure we go through and see what rules we have that we've completely forgotten about. What we might want to change is our constitution episodes. Now that this is all typed out, theater mom went through and posted it. We're going to change everything. Oh, the listeners are did clicking off right now. We're going to say things out loud. I'm just going to type. This is the last word I'm going to say right now. What I do. Bob, that's out loud. You can't say that. So this is my inner thoughts. I'm not talking what happened. I had a keyboard shortcut or something in my whole computer with black for a second. It's I'm not going to do that anymore. That's good stuff. Good stuff. What I've gathered from my quick glancing over this so far is that we are called distractable. You mocking the host right now? I'm sorry. No, I had something in my throat. Oh, okay. Just making sure because don't fucking do that again. I'm very sad, man. I'm crying. That's how I cry. It's my true cry. The true cry. Oh, God. It's crying like a PS2 character. So unbelievably accurate. All right. Look, I've been thinking about this. If we're going to add, if we're going to add anything to the costusion, I think we need to add a way to delete shit off the wheel. And I have a concept. So we have the wheel of victory, right? Whatever. The red bonus points wheel. I like it. I liked it. There's a lot of stuff on it. You know what I don't like is when we click spin and something comes up and we look at it and we're like skeleton dancing. Oh, no. I think if we if we land on something and we can't remember what it is, deleted, deleted. I'm glad you brought that up, Bob. I'm giving you a point for it. I was already going to vote to delete stuff from the wheel because I've had some family that watched the podcast approach like wait, please don't tell me the last time you had sex. Oh, I'm definitely going to remember that one. That's not getting deleted. I have had so many people, like friends and fed them like, dude, I really don't want to know. What is there any contingency? I don't really care. But is there any contingency if like all of us pretend to not remember it? Like we all are like, oh, I don't know. And it's kind of obvious that we're kind of faking it. Should that still go through? There is no test of sincerity. We need a test of sincerity. No shit. No, that's not. We're not adding that. I don't know what that is, but I don't like it. We'll have a group lie detector test. What is it called? A poly polygraph. Yeah, we'll get polygraph every episode that we wanted to delete. We have to submit for polygraph testing. We'll get our our our our distractable writer, wink on that to figure out what that's about. Look, next season's going to be a banger. It's going to get crazy. Game changers, you're fucked. Yeah. More importantly, change gamers, you're extra fucked. Evansurus, we may or may not reach out. We forgot. So we don't know if anything happened there. Sorry. If we ever talk or do anything together, this is a taste you've been warned. No, so is that a unanimous adoption of the if we can't remember it, it's deleted. And the remembering can be however it if we all say we don't remember that we don't remember. There's no dick measure. I vote yes. Just make it so subreddit person. Article five of this says something about a flag system. I thought we abolished the flag system because it didn't make any sense that we replaced it with the the thing that I'm not going to say. The thing yes, yes, yes, yes. Did we never did we not get rid of the flag system? Do we just leave it? We probably didn't remember that there was a flag system. And so we thought the coin was like this brilliant new idea. Yeah. Yeah. Or something like that. I don't know. Wait, was the coin flipping a part of that? Fuck that. I vote we strike Article five. And if there is something about this coin and a word, it now becomes article five and loses its place somewhere of the the fuck it was. - I think possibly, I think possibly it's an amendment. - Well, look through the amendments when we get there. But for now, I agree flags. We've already got a system for that flags can go. I agree. - Aye. - Aye. I forgot to honor the second amendment. - Oh. - Every, every inaugural, every boat episode, which is technically this is a boat episode, I think there has to be a fart joke. Oh, wait, no. The boat episode is unrelated to the cost. They just happened to overlap, right? - Yeah. - This is a boat episode. Boats like a celebratory company event, you know? God, we should really get more staff. Fuck, we don't have any staff. - No, we need like a congress and staffers, we're like management. - I got it. We actually do finally reach out to a vantress and we kidnap them. We put them in a basement. We make them be our staff. We make the hosts, the actual participants, not their staff. We don't take their staff. We take the hosts. - I love this. I lie, I, I, they can take their staff to work under them but they still have to be our staff. - Oh my God, when did we make this? Fourth amendment, June 10th, 2024, from the inaugural boat episode apparently, if there is a guest, whether they are human, animal, or robot, they are required to read an advertisement script if there is one pending. So guests have to do ad reads. What did we do with that? What? - What? - Oh, that's so specific. - Well, I didn't think of that. - I was reading the first articles, not the amendment. I forgot that the articles stay in the amendments 'cause it's so they need to stay. Legally, they're all the same. You could literally write an amendment that says article five don't count or you can just delete it. It's okay. Whatever Mark wanted to have happen, that's what happens. - Okay, yeah. You all know my meaning. Wait, we abolished handshake deals, but we still do this. Why is Bob's immortality an amendment? That's crazy. I know how that became an amendment, but I'm not gonna. - What's the punishment if you break it? - If I die, you guys could kick me off the show. I think that's fair. - Yeah, because it would be impossible in this game and show for you not to be immortal therefore, it would break the universe and we'd all be expunished. - I don't think we should look at the document. - I think we should talk about our wants and our desires and our dreams for this show. - I agree. I like it. - I also think we should add, maybe this is too much chaos. I think we should add a way to instantly modify the constitution. I think it should be a living, breathing document. I don't know if it's coin based or if it's just votes, like maybe a unanimous vote, we could just be like, get rid of that, all three of us vote. - Wait, what if it's not unanimous? Then do we have to flip a coin or just majority? - Well, if it's not unanimous, then we could do the special word that triggers a coin flip, which then the coin could decide that our vote was incorrect and remedy the situation on its own. - Like a veto of fate. If we do that and get all tails and it will be made doubly fair, I'm not really clear what exactly that means in terms of modifying the cut, but I don't really care, 'cause I think that's pretty funny. - Well, cross that bridge when we get to it, it'll never happen. - There's no way that's gonna happen. There's no way that's gonna happen. - There's no way that that would happen. - If the name of our constitution should be we'll cross that bridge when we get to it. - That could, you know, our constitution could just be that sentence. Constitution, article one, we'll cross that bridge when we get to it. And then we're just out here crossing bridges every episode. Then you don't have to think about it too much. - Yeah, I'm down with always being able to change it, but it shouldn't be willing, nilly. There should be, but we already have the word, but I feel like we need something further or is the word enough to instigate it? Could a coin flip be the moment where I was like, ah, we must change it, or is it like an impasse? That must be addressed. We could just leave that to the coin flip, I guess. The coin makes good decisions. So we just need to add a thing that says, you can challenge parts of the constitution in the form of a coin flip declaration. - Hmm, but that would leave it so one person has the power to make a constitutional change. And I feel like that has to be an agreed upon action. A lot of power in this lot of power. Constitutional changes can be made by unanimous vote or by majority with exception of a coin flip prevention. It's a lot to remember and we're never going to, but it needs to be shorter and funnier. - Yeah, it needs to be shorter and funnier. And something we'll actually remember. - Us, yay, no loses. - What if it's a wheel? And it's a wheel with our three names on it, and each of us gets a vote. So it's the wheel can be unanimous or the wheel can be two thirds one thing, two thirds the other or one thirds the other thing, right? So if we, if two of us want to get rid of something, but one of us is protesting, then the wheel has a two out of a two thirds chance to land on a yes vote, but a one third chance to land on a veto vote. - But how does that propose, how do we start the propose? - It could be, could it be to initiate an amendment? It's a host power, right? It's a host base power. So only the hosts can start it, but they only get like, we could go back to the flag thing where there's only one, you can make one per season. Two, three, two, one, three, two, one, two. - Less than 20. What if it's like a, you can make an amendment, but if it gets vetoed, you lose it. - Yeah, it's like sports. It's like sports challenges. If your challenge succeeds, you keep it, but if you fail. - This is probably the same thing we said about the flex. Like yeah, if it wins, it's the same thing, but it's for amendments. Two per season, if they're both right, you can keep going, if one's wrong, that's all you get to those two. But it's only the hosts can do it. 'Cause it's the competitors that say the other thing, so this is like a, who knows if the host wants to do it, they're gonna vote yes on the wheel. So they at least have a one in three vote to do what they want, but they could have everyone on their side if they have a strong case. - Yeah, yeah. And it needs to be a super majority, a unanimous or it needs to be at least just two out of three. - I think it needs to be, well, I think the wheel can decide. So like it just needs to be our three names and each of us decides before I had what our vote is and whoever it lands on, it goes their way. But like so that the probability is, you know, if two of us vote yes, one votes no, then yes has a better chance, but it's not a guaranteed win. How do we bring lobbyists into this? How do we get people to pay money? Do we also each get at least one like veto to ensure that two of us don't just flat out be like, all right, what if Bob has to this entire season blindfolded? - No, that's a thing. - And Bob's like, no, no, no. - This is just to delete. This is not to add, this is to delete. All this does is get rid of something. - The host promote is just for deletion. - Yeah, so the host can be like, I want to get rid of the entire coin flip section. - It would never pass, Congress. - Well, how do we add? Is adding have to be unanimous? - Do we need congressional districts for this or something? - Okay, we each start our own Patreon and the amount of money that we get monthly there are turbines our voting power. - I claim Mark's name. - Hey, my super PAC is gonna be called "Markiplier 4 Distractable." (laughing) - Hey, what? - You guys are better politics than me. Hold on. - You can have many in your Lordship, you can have one of those too. - My super PAC's gonna be called Ted Cruz for Congress. He's popular, right? - Oh, yeah. Oh, oh. - Definitely amongst our podcasting audience, probably. - Everybody loves Ted. So the host can initiate a deletion. We do the wheel. He just, whatever, whomever the wheel lands on, their vote is the one that counts, but everyone declares their votes. So it's like a probability thing. And it can be unanimous. It doesn't really matter. I think if both competitors want to veto it maybe, but they have to be in alignment, is your saying maybe there should be a veto? No, I don't know if we need a veto. - Well, I was thinking for adding stuff. If we're just deleting stuff, I think it was just deleting. I don't think we need like a veto thing. I think it can just go to the. - No, I agree for deletion, I agree. I was thinking if we were adding something, I said one person being ganged up on, we would never do that. We're very sure. - You can say fair, you can fair is not a ban term. - Just fair, just fair, just regular fair, and no other part of it. This is not meant to be a discrimination either, but I'm gonna say, Wade, you don't get this power of this episode. It starts. - No, that, that, I agree. - Yeah, all things start in the next one, yeah. - The Constitution episode should definitely be more collaborative than us first them. - It's a battle. - In fact, should a Constitution episode always just end with a wheel spin to see who hosts the next one? - Man, we don't remember how we did in the last one, and we can't be bothered to look it up. - No winner is to be announced for the boat meeting episode. Thus, no points will be assigned. No additional showing between official recordings. The winning count will continue into the episode that follows. The winner who won the episode before the boat episode will host the next one. So, Wade still hosts the next one. - Ha, ha. - Well, that's, I'm fine with that, but is that boat or Constitution? 'Cause we're. - I think this is, I think this is meant to be a Constitution episode. I think they're, well, the letter of the law only states boat. It is the, we can change it now, but it won't apply until the next. So, how do we wanna handle the Constitution? We're doing it the same way. We wanna, we don't want to be the hosts. Points again, how do we wanna handle this? I mean, I guess you're the host, so you could decide. You have congressional power because you are presiding over. That's true. - You have the power, the power of the mercs. - But this does apply to all of us, so I still welcome opinions. You guys, it's like Supreme Court. I might be the one that's a bad reference to the state. - Why do I get a bus? If we're the Supreme Court, how do I get my bus? - Isn't it Star Bolivore? You can pay like $70,000 and get a star. Maybe you just pay me money and you get a bus. - I see, I see. Is that how much is? - I don't know, I saw this thing about it, but maybe it was not true. - Your Honor, may I approach the bench? - Oh, the flashbacks. Yeah, man, of course. - Oh, God, that can be second hand cringe again. I don't laugh, make sure you don't laugh. - You've hardly acknowledged my boo-boo. I just wanna point out, no one's acknowledged yet. - Your camera won't focus on it until you had one. - It's here, my boo-boo. You've hardly noticed my boo-boo. - I'm sorry about your boo-boo, what happened to your boo-boo? - I cut my finger. - On, a knife. - I'm gonna assume it was an accident, not a cult ritual. - I see on to my story. - All right, well, I'm sorry about your boo-boo. I hope it heals up. - Did you have to get stitches? Do you need stitches? - No, I think I got it quick enough. - Is that how stitches works? (laughs) - If you're too slow, getting a bad night on there, you progress to needing stitches? - Well, see, I've learned this a while ago, but I think in terms of healing, the old mentality was that, you know, keep it, it wouldn't dry and dry it out. Should be like the Sahara in there, dry, keep it dry. And then we realized that it needs to be gushy, gushy, wet to really heal, 'cause when I burn my hands, I don't have horrible scarring, because I kept ripping the bandages off and re-opening the wounds, and then slapping a bunch of bassatracin on it, and it worked, so it's perfectly good. So I was like, "Oh, I'll do the same here." And they make these new, like, well, I don't know how new they are, but they're like gel bandages. They're kind of like, got this kind of rubbery texture to it. And it's got like a strip of basically neosporant gel that it just plops on there. I think it'll, I mean, I always chop it all the way off, but I think it'll heal right back up. So yeah, it's like turning darker on the tip. That's because it's necrotizing. - That's probably fine. - You don't wanna have a dead tip. - I think I heard I can grow it back with pig bladder, only one way to find out. - I think I heard that from us. - I might have mentioned this here. - Yeah, I think I heard that from Mark, actually, to be very specifically. - Dear Jam, I can't believe this happened to Mark. - Ugh, what was Jam again? - Journal of a, oh, uh, American medicine. (laughing) - I don't know if it was the Journal of American Medicine of America. - Right, and there was a distractable plus five years ago, but we're back again. It's like, you're coming back to the same thing. It was like, "Buy a medical engineering PhD, or please don't chop your finger, and rub pig bladder powder on it." How would you know? Have you ever tried it? Which is probably the exact same thing I said then. Ah, never said, yeah, yeah, yeah. - There's probably an association. One of the two ways is probably association, or associates, or. - Sorry, I distracted us. Should there be something in the, why, we should have something in the constitution about being distracted. Bonus points, probably, to them of our podcast. - Yeah, but I mean, yeah, it's gotta be something that incentivizes it more. We need, like, tax incentives to be able to do more distractions, right? - We can see if the IRS will give us a tax break, I guess. - I feel like we should have a call line, a phone line where viewers and listeners can dial in, but it's like, they don't know when we're recording. (laughing) - Yeah, middle of the night, hang on, Molly, I'm with someone's calling. - Hey, you said the fair rule. - Oh, sorry, we're not recording right now, click. - I love that thing in shows, like the horrifying game changers that we hate, where they have the contestants do things off show, right? Like, Taskmaster does it, where they have them doing a thing, in the interim and they film it. I love shit like that. Why don't we do that? Our show should be so good. Why don't we try? - Well, if I'm getting really real, I think it's because we all still have other things, like our only thing we do isn't the show, whereas people that live and breathe their show, they put their all. I mean, you just made a fucking movie. - I'm not making it now. - It sounds like you're making something. What's that behind you? - Oh no, it's done. - If we can disc make it to fine, then I'll run it. - They'll run on their own, but we can make this show something great. - We can do that. - We can be top 10. We can be number one, you know? I don't know if we need constitutional amendments about that, we could just do, we could just do. - We declare that we must be the number one podcast. - I don't think we're so. - How often do the top podcast post, are we not higher up because we only post once or twice a week? - And they're like 13 Joe Rogan episodes a week. I don't even know. - I don't know. I don't know what determines that. - What if there's a thing where you can steal an episode if you have a bit, an outside the show bit that you record and bring in and you just start playing it and you can like like hijack the episode. - I feel like it would have to be a mission that gets sent out for like the next episode 'cause it's like the host, I feel like, or it could be just completely random, it's really right. It's like me when I recorded all those, you know, intro, intros that I did for various random segments that I did. - Yeah. - We'd have to have a lot more forethought in our planning and also we'd have to know what each other are up to. Like if Mark's like, hey, I'm going on a honeymoon and we're like, well, while you're there. - I would do it. - We could do like Taskmasker though, right? Where it's like, we could just have a list and then it's like from the episode where we declare that list. If you bring in a bit to an episode, you get like a bunch of points or you can hijack the episode or like you win by default or something. - I love these things where it's like, we say things a while ago and 'cause we're so bad at remembering. If we remember and we say like, it has to be a minimum number of weeks ahead or episodes ahead. Like there's a bounty board for like five episodes ahead to do this. - I mean, it could be this season. Like we could at the start of the season, we'd be like, all right, here's a bounty board. Maybe we can update this if we start burning through stuff but like the start of the season, we put out a bounty board and it's like, if you do one of these missions, film it, bring it in as a bit. We play it on the show, hijacked. I don't know what the reward, what's a good reward? - Automatic five points or something like that. Like big points that actually could change the course of that whole episode. 'Cause I feel like we are very competitive but it's like, I want that extra proactive steppender to do something. And it doesn't have to be big. This is why I want GoPro to fucking talk to me. So fucking badly. (all laughing) - This is all but an ad for Ghost first talk too. - I don't know, I didn't want it, they won't. But it's like, that's what I need, right? 'Cause even the DJI thing, it's nice, but it's in its case and you gotta undo it and you gotta feel like a fucking doofus. It's kinda delicate, yeah, you gotta, yeah. - As opposed to just picking it up and hitting, you can hit the, on all the GoPro's, you can just hit the record button and then pick it up, it starts going, right? That's the level of convenience I want is like, I want to, they don't talk to me and I think they're getting sold. - Yeah, well, they were in trouble, right? Wasn't there kind of a Hail Mary with this generation, with the cinema sensors and the-- - Come amateur's been buying up a lot of people lately. - That sounds really bad. (all laughing) - How was that supposed to be good? - Oh, GoPro, come amateur's. - GoPro, come amateur. - Yeah, the joke was there until the words came out and then I realized how bad it sounded based on your two's expression and just really felt like it was somewhere. - Let's say I'm a nowhere. (all laughing) - 'Cause I want to veto that name. - It's too late now, man, it's too late. You're gonna, no, I think in the Constitution needs to be included, you must film the mission on a come amateur camera. - I don't wanna, I don't wanna. - All right, bounty, bounty for this year, Wade has to get a brain scan of some kind. I don't think a full MRI doesn't have to be this like, he has to have electrodes to his brain and then he has to like show us what his thought process is. Like go through some bits, bounty. I apply, I submit for the bounty board. - I like that, I think that's good. Did they make like home kits where you could scan your own brain at home? There's no way. - All right, you're talking less MRI and more so like, they hook stuff up and like, they see what parts of my brain light up to different prompts. Are those invasive? - No, it's literally just electrodes taped on your head. - You are actually perfect for it. - 'Cause you have no hair. - You don't have hair. - Yeah, that's right, that's true. You can go right on there. - Okay, if they offer that here in Cincinnati, I'll try to find a way. But I'd be fascinated to know how my, maybe I just need to go to therapy and then record my sessions. - Oh, that'd be great. - Do therapy with that on and have like a lot of, recording of your brain as it's happening? - They find some deep-seated trauma. You guys are like, "Ah, that's how it's brain working." Like, "Gramma." - No, dig into it, dig into it. I like the idea of like multi-part missions where it's like, you have to go and get some specific thing and then you pull it out in the episode, right? You're like, you have to go, maybe it's like food or, I want the bounties to be good. And not just like a video of me going to Kroger to buy an apple, I bought an apple at the store. - All right, because they can be on the list, but they're not done, we could make it fan participation. They could have a weekly roundup of like, voting up a bounty or submitting things. And then we could have our moderators or whatever submitted to a list. - We could post there doing of the bounties too. - No, quit this. - Never mind. - Oh, it has to be a nice thing. - Yeah, stupid. - Whoa, whoa, whoa. We get to monetize it. Come on, it's us, it's us, it's us. - Stupid dinkle, my hair, stupid dinkle, my. - Oh, I have one that needs to be on the bounty board. It's kind of unfair. - Ah! - Oh! - Wait, you have to decide. You have to decide. - Here you're the host. - So you declared unfair on. - The thing I was about to say, I guess. - So either nothing happens. - You get the rent. really doubly say it. I don't know what that means. Or your ideas, this bounty could be worth double points. Oh, yeah, I think that's, I think that makes sense. Either if it's, if it is unfair, the bounty doesn't go on the board. If it's fair, if it's doubly fair, it's just work double points because it's such a good bounty. All right. So heads is in favor. You declared it. So heads. Three heads means it's a really good bounty. It's work double. Three tails means it doesn't go on the board. All right. I'm an idiot. Oh, I got heads heads. Fails. Ah, that's good. That means my idiot mistake didn't cost the same thing. Anyway, I was going to say for all three of us, I feel like it should be a bounty. If you're in public and someone recognizes you, get a video with them to be like and have them like explain or you explain if they don't want to be on camera. But like, get a video to bring in to be like, hey, they want this is a watcher or a listener or whatever, right? Like, I just like that because I think it's funny. I always feel really awkward when someone comes up and it's like, I love distracted and I just want to be like, can I have a video? Can we take a picture? I know you're just in your everyday life, but can we do this, right? And they'll immediately be like, oh, I don't want to do that. So what do I still feel? But if they walk up to me, they're like, hey, are you Bob from Markiplier? I think there's something to that. But it needs to be more specific. You have to say yes, and you have to go with it, but you can, you can get credit for that. Yeah, there's got to be something that we, like, I like the idea of that, but they have to know the bit. They have to know something because they listen to this. So it has to be something that they say or do or have on them. You know, like, and what does that show with like the three doors in Wayne Brady? And it's like, did anyone bring a spoon? Cause I, oh, yeah, I want to make a deal. Yeah, I want to make a deal. It's like someone like that where the audience has to do that. And if we meet in life and they have that, then we know they're a real fan, and that completes the bounty. What if it's a coin, and if they have to have a coin, and then they have to flip it. And if they get heads, you succeed at the bounty. But if they get tails, you fail at the bounty. So they have to have the coin to begin with, but then you still have to win the coin flip to actually get the bounty. How many of these, like, let's say you run into like three different people. Can you film it three different times in one go? I mean, look, if that's the life you want to live, I guess, I would say if it's like a group of three people, I guess, and they all meet you all at once. Like, they come, that's like one encounter, which gives you more odds of them having a coin, but you only get one coin flip. I'd say if there's more than one fan, they all have to flip though. And it has to be majority, the majority gets heads. Because that, if there's so many that it gets into your favor. So we got to balance it out, right? If it's three separate events throughout like the course of a week, if it's three, I mean, but this is a thing, right? This, this happens to be once in a while, not a ton. But like, if it's at different times, at different, if it's unrelated, I think each one is just its own thing, right? And if you happen to be out at the mall and it's like, you run into someone 20 minutes later, you run into someone three hours later, you. If all we have on us is our phone phone quality, okay? For this kind of recording. Oh, yeah. However you get it. That's up to you. If you want the point, you got to keep your, your recorders on you. And I, maybe we could keep it like one per day per person per each of us, one event of meeting fans. I don't think I'll typically have to worry about that too much. But yeah, yeah, I'm okay with the cap because I think that pretty much exclusively affects Mark. Yeah, yeah. Make it fair. Make it fair. We're like, Mark, this month, we had one fan interaction. Mark's like, dude, here's my list of the last hour scroll. I've been saving them. I've eight videos from yesterday of fans flipping and getting heads. Most of them didn't get heads. Dude, I haven't talked about how going back to Cincinnati is way more, like, getting recognized in anywhere else I go to. I was walking around like Europe and nobody, this fine, which is cool. Like, it's totally fine. Usually it's not that bad in even L.A. I walk around, it's totally fine. But in Cincinnati, it's crazy. Everyone. I think anyway, little everyone, yeah. You're a Cincinnati man. Thank you. I try to be. Anyway, you're greatest in Cincinnati. Yeah, we are. That's a good one. That could be it practically. It's own amended by itself instead of just a bounty. If you have a fan interaction, you have to get, they have to have a coin and you have to get a video of the coin flip. And if it's heads, you click, is it once it's claimed by one of us, it's claimed and that's it. Probably or that's one I could see repeating, but it's like, also, it should have a cool down. It's if it should or else it every week, we might like, what if both, like, what if both competitors bring in the same bounty for that particular episode? Yeah, share the points split the points. Okay. How many points is a bounty worth? I kind of like, I feel like five points is a good amount for the range. Like, I think I tend to give the most points and five points would still sway mine pretty substantially almost all the time. And for like Mark, Mark, sometimes you only get like five, six, seven points. So it would be like a huge swing potentially. Yeah. I feel like five makes sense. And we can, we can look, we can adjust that if we decide we need to. We ever decide on how we want to end the constitution episodes, whether it's just the host again, or whether we want to spend a wheel or how we want to do that. Why, you in a rush? You want to get out of here? Yeah. We're having a great time. Come on. Well, no, but I still wanted to answer that before I forgot. Well, across that virtual, we get to it. Okay. We will revisit this in approximately 10 minutes. Hey, that was our thing. I thought we were doing that. I thought that was the thing. It was, it was well done. I got. We're going to have like, maybe a weekly post where it's like this week's bounties suggestions. And then we'll have, we'll ask the mods maybe to aggregate them into like a master list of bounties. Yeah, yeah. I think, I think we do need maybe to be able to say like, oh, that one doesn't count or something, like if, because I, I trust the mods generally, but if one gets on their words, like, well, go to an in and out. Yeah. If it's too easy, it can't be too easy. Yeah. But we can't all do that. Oh, okay. All right. Yeah. Okay. It can't be too easy. If it was a shake shack, there is one of those here, but that's maybe in the small talk round, we should just have a quick little segment to be like. And these are the bounties we're adding to the list. And we could check them over for that. That would be us. We could have a segment. We have a segment. The bounty segment sponsored by Intel sponsored by bounty paper towels. If we do this and that doesn't happen, I will never recover. I like this. I like that they're optional because I'm very lazy and I will only sporadically even want to do them. Yeah. Wait. It's never going to do this. This is just extra competition between me and Mark Wade's not going to engage with this at all. 100%. It means I will lose even more often, but I'm excited for it. We could put a bounty on there that would be like Wade has to go to his basement on purpose and take a video of himself saying, I claim the bounty where I went to my basement for no other reason than this. And you would still not do it. Don't make it my basement because that's where I'm at right now. Make it like goes outside. No, but see you're in their basement because we were going to record you'd have to be done recording go upstairs to the rest of your house. Then consciously choose to go down some stairs to the basement. I still think that's too easy for me. You have to at least make me like go a place I wouldn't normally go anyway. I feel like you wouldn't do it. I'd be willing to put that on there just to see if you do it or not because I feel like you'd forget about it and never do it. And it'd be fine. I also want the system where we could be given secret bounties like that others don't know about that only we know and they're limited time, right? Like in the next four episodes, you could do XYZ and it's something that specifically one of us could do. We could have the distractable writer give us things because that would be something that none of us would know except whom Stever was told. Homest. I'm so excited for you guys to do this stuff. Wait, it's going to be a hell of a show for you, man. Just you wait. He's playing it cool now. He really, he really. My bounties are going to be like, wait, show up and don't look like you just rolled out of bed. Wait, don't order DoorDash during episode. It's at fail. We don't have to talk about that. You see, what do you mean don't have to suffer? You literally announced whenever you have to do it every episode. I don't say the place by name. They're not paying me. I'm paying them. I just say food is on the way, gentlemen. I like this. I think we have to have an official vote on this. All that stuff we just said, I vote aye. And then adding in some extra being like this system is in progress. It's beta and it will this amendment will be in flux over the next few weeks as we feel it out. This is a broad constitutional amendment. We will work on the regulations as we go. Okay, the regs can change and it's fully optional. None of us has to do anything, but we are welcome to and it will definitely give us an edge. It's not optional to be subject to the system. It's just optional to participate. Yes, agree. Exactly. Hi, hi. What if it's fun? What if it's like go to a Brazilian steakhouse and eat your own weight in meat? I can't do that anymore. I can eat a lot. I got out eaten by one of my nephews recently. It's ironic because if I weighed less, I would probably eat less, but because I'm such an eater, I feel like I could do it, but I weigh so much it might not be physically possible. I've been actively trying to vary up my diet a little bit and I've eaten more salads. Anyways, that's not he either here nor there. I've been trying to be a little bit better. I like this. I like this a lot. I know Mark will do this and he'll edit his own thing and it will be this beautiful thing. I'm going to need to like have an editor fix mine because it's going to be a bunch of shaky ass footage of me being like, "God, good guys, I met you very much." Like Sam fix it. You'll be like, "Wait, read a book." And I'm gonna have my toe, my toes holding my phone up, watching me read a book. He's like, "Oh God, wait, it's just a crunch." I was like, "Well, just trust me, bro, it's there." - You got it? That's why you need the GoPro's 'cause they're hypersmooth technology. - My GoPro's literally sitting right there waiting for action. - Waiting for action. - You got a mission before me. - No, I didn't have a mission. I was filming James's trains with it, I'm gonna be honest. He makes train tracks, and then he's like, "Video, my train, go around the track." And I make, I have to do it, 'cause-- - I feel bad because I don't even have a GoPro here, and I always used to. I don't even know where my DJI pocket is. - You always had 'em around, I'm surprised, you don't. - I saw empty boxes at my storage, and it was just, I don't know, we're there. I replaced 'em all with my higher quality cameras. That's my problem. I got a gap doing my phone and my big cameras, and I need to, I want you to GoPro you, please. Stick around long enough to give me the fucking camera. - Come expert. - Come expert? - Is that better, right? - No, what's the good setting for come? Or another end of 'em? - Just don't try it. - Approach, approach expert. - Approach me, expert. (laughing) - Wentcon, I gotta bust out the old Wentcon for this film. The problem word is come just to be clear, Wade. - Well, no, I got it, but the combination was particularly heinous. I mean, it's not heinous, it's just distasteful. And contextually, it was misunderstood, which actually made us laugh really hard. - It's true, if you weren't the host, it probably would have got you some points, something. - Well, that's a good thing I'm the host here. Okay, so we all voted in favor of the bounties. We're trying to get sponsored by GoPro. I think we've covered all the important things. Anything else we need to go over about the constitution? - I don't, there's nothing else that burns at me where I'm like, "God, why do we do this? Why do we do this?" - I think we're, I think it's in a pretty good spot. Oh, I was thinking about this. Do we want to have Eddie, does it matter if we want to have rules about like bottle episodes or do we want to just do that completely ad hoc? Like, 'cause I'm thinking like if I have a dream in a vision and I'm working with people to put together like tabletop one shot type things, where it's like, it'll be a complete bottle episode. And it's just like, you know, it's just us screwing around doing like some tabletop misadventure type thing. It could just be when I host, I do that. But it could also be like, if we wanted to do a series, you know, if it turned out we recorded for three hours because it was really fun. And it could just be a multi-part. We don't need like a rule for that, right? It's like, if the episode continues, we could just split it into multiple parts and it's just like whoever wins hosts the next one. - I'm fine with to be continued episodes if there's a reason for something to go on for multi-parts. I think that should all come out together 'cause otherwise it gets- - Yeah, you know what, split it into ones for that. So yeah, so I mean, I'm fine with that. We just get to the end of whatever that is and then we'll do the- - I just have this vision that I'm trying to make actually come to life and it might lead to that. But I don't, I think it's fine. We'll do it with that, that'll be fine. - No, I like that. I think that we should all prep the audience to explore the concepts of what audio-visual podcasts can be 'cause the host can do whatever they want, right? - I will say too, I'm eventually gonna move out of my panel of trash. I have a room, a room that's unfinished down to the studs that I plan on customizing and developing into an actual studio instead of a bedroom I pile my stuff into. And I want it to look nice. I don't know if I'm capable of achieving that, but I could find, like Mark is, Mark must know someone who can help, so I have a goal. Like the walking every mile every day, I reach my goals. - I wanna do that too. It's so hard to do that on my knee right now, but man, I wanna be outside. It's such beautiful weather in Cincinnati right now. - Go to Europe, you just walk around a lot. - Been high 60s, low 70s, like last week or so. It's been so gorgeous. And like, apparently you can't go from not playing basketball to just jumping around like a maniac for two hours and expect your knees to be fine, I guess. - Who knew? - If we're voting for Bob's proposal of the continuation of episodes, I. - I. - Oh, I. - I have a proposal. It's if I want to treat the audience like Congress, and I think we should allocate them a discretionary budget that they can vote what they spend on. - On a monthly or weekly basis. - Hold on, hold on, we're good for us to incorporate into the show, right? So it's not a lot, it's not a lot. It's like, you can tell that we're thin on the money fret right now, we're like audience. - No, they're not giving the money. - No, we're giving them our money. - No, wait, hold on, no veto. - Wait, it's not gonna, I'll cover yours, man. It's not gonna be a lot. I see the vision. I see where this is going, I like it. - I think we should allocate like 500 bucks a month to the discretionary concepting and idea budget that they get to spend or make us spend. - If the subreddit can coalesce around an idea. - Yes. - We will spend each, 500 each on. - All right, hold on. - Or is it total? Is it total? - I'm saying it's total, but all right, okay, all right. Okay, 500 each, 500 each. - Well, I would do, I would do 500 each, but I'm not trying to force you guys. - If it was total, that's also cool. But I feel like 500 each would be like, 'cause some, I'm imagining there's gonna be some bits, right? Where it's like, each of you spend a hundred to a couple hundred bucks on this thing and that's like a bit like a costume or I don't know what, right? But, and I don't know if there needs to be a, well, this is your thing, I'm sort of taking it over. I just really like it. I think it's a good idea. - I think that we should have some rules about it. The predominant purge purpose of the item, despite its actual purpose, should be for the improvement and/or content of the show. And it must be something that we could obtain without Undo-burden. - I like the legal terms like that, you know? - Yeah, Undo-burdened people. - Basically, if we like it, we'll do it, if we don't, we won't. - And it must fit in the view of the camera. - And none of our cameras look out windows, so there's no including of outdoor spaces in that. I suppose we should modify that one, but it's like, it must be film-uple without Undo-burden. - So look, so this, I was gonna get to like, I don't think we need like a vote number or something. This isn't like a hard thing. But it needs to be like, there needs to be clear consensus that like enough people are excited about something. And we are part of the, we are we the people, right? We are still people here. So we can like, we can lobby Congress. We can be the lobbyists we want to be in the world. Or we can, you know, we could be the Supreme Court and just say, yes, yes. Whatever you said, except how we say it and change the laws arbitrarily, however we see fit. Or we could be like the president and just executive order whatever we want into existence and say that the people wanted that. We can be all three branches of government here because we really are, yeah, we'll do it on the fly, right? We'll make it work, it has to work. Are you sure we're cool with 500 each a month? 'Cause that is a lot. I was gonna say originally like 100 each a month. But then like that might not be quite enough to do cool, cool. - It's just depending on whether it's an each thing or a pool thing. - What's like, we do like a pool of 600 so it'd be 200 each a month. - Yeah, what if it's 200 each a month? But it's like, we could all pool together. - It doesn't have to hit that amount. It can be left. - One big thing if it's like, well, you know, one of us has to do it or something. Well, we'll put it at a tester of like 600 total ish 200 a month of each of us. And then it'll be a loose delineation. We'll see what they get and then adjust from there. - You know, immediately the ideas are gonna be like, go to Guam and fill an episode in a bounce house. Can you get that for 600 bucks? How much are flights to Guam? - Can I fit a bounce house in about five square feet? Okay, wait for wheels of cheese to appear in a moment. Fucking episode. Oh, any wheels of cheese. Can you get for 600 bucks? - I am not filling my room with Styrofoam. I will veto that ahead of time. - I like this. I like this. It's gonna get the subrate. - Royal Bup. - We are literally creating the world's greatest podcast. This is the season. - I can't wait to veto every idea. I'm excited. - We don't have ultimate veto power. We're gonna have to play what we're gonna have to work within the system by which I mean, make up our own rules. But we're gonna have to appease the people or they will revolt. And we're officially declaring, I guess, to the subreddit is the place, right? - There's no, 'cause there is like a discord and that we are looking at the subreddit. The subreddit is the hub of political activity. - There might be a need for more real-time communication. Again, we'll figure it out. Lucy, can we make the discord the place? - I just feel like the subreddit has much more activity generally. - That's because we appeal to them a lot, but we start appealing to the discord. Maybe they'd go there. Where you guys willing to go? Let us know. - You guys figure it out. We can't do everything for you. Come on. The subreddit has a whole thing and they're like, we want the discord and it's everyone's time. Yeah, I mean, we maybe just adjust that on the fly. - Yeah, yeah. It's like by what they need more than anything. It's like if they need. - Discord is easier communication. They're ready to feel like it's easier to see overall topics. - Well, but the discord has a threads thing now too, right? So you basically can't have a discord where you also have reddit threads where it's like, it's a more permanent chronological record of a discussion as opposed to like scrolling chats and chats and chats, it does exist. It's a thing. - It's also a little temporary. I think it deletes after a while, but only, I think it may only be based on inactivity. So I might auto-delete if it's not reactive, which might be a good thing. - Well, which is perfect, 'cause. - If you're not talking about it, we're not gonna do it. - Yeah, exactly. - I like this. This is interesting. This is dangerous. This might be the greatest constitution episode we've ever had. three weeks from now. Can't be fucking believe this shit. God damn it. I think that's why it's exciting because part of me is like this is definitely going to go wrong in a way we're not understanding right now and it's going to be it's hopefully going to be really funny but especially going to be just a huge paid in the ass and we're going to be like never mind. We're not doing that party more back to normal. We always have the ability we can make it we can make anything work or not work in accordance with their needs. Plus Wade has to participate in that part. He might not want to do bounties. I want to do bounties. I think that sounds funny, but you have to participate in the political system we've invented. We'll see about that. No, you have to. I'll see if I find a way out. We'll see that's fun too. We'll see if you find a way out. Are there any other any other declarations or proposals? I'm empty. I'm I'm satisfied. I'm just really excited. I'm just thinking about stuff. I can't wait for the I can't wait for this to come out. So we could see how big of a mistake it is. Well, in that case, I've got one final one. And is that the bridge we've come to guys? Look, the bridge. Guess we'll cross it. I think Wade has to host the next one. Yeah, I think yes. I think there's no winner here. We just did our civic duties to the distractible populace and and then we're back back to the normal timeline next time. So constitution episodes, the host will there always host the following episode as well. Can't disrupt the chain of succession. Yes. And it's then it's just arbitrary. Aside from the fact that the first ever host was completely arbitrary, I'm sure that the chain of succession back to the beginning of time of distractible is completely pure and undisturbed. I'm sure it's perfect. So do we skip wheels and all that then? Yeah, well, there's no winner. There's no points. I mean, if you wrote down points, you want to say, I guess I did write down points. I can go through. They don't mean anything, but you can say them if you like them. Well, they mean something. Trust me. All right, Mark, you got points for sandy leg acid orifices, putting Google on blast. F of the system, drink with no lid audience optimism. Good. Interesting. Okay, article, maybe good article, good article points, because we were going through the articles of the amendment at one point. Flags, but better boo, boo, too fast for stitches. And then I didn't give any more points because we determined they basically wouldn't matter. So I just kind of quit at that point. Bob, you got two points for drum rolls. You got a point for James Power wheels. Bob is Edison, the slide James smile. You pulled off of whenever he was. Didn't you say Bob is Edison? Yeah, but I gave you a point because you inspired me. Okay, I'll take it. I'll take it. You got a Jim Carey point. You saved Mark with the PS2 cry, deleting things from wheel. I liked that. You gave some good amendment points. And I gave you a point for cross that bridge when we get to it. How many points they are? It doesn't matter because I also gave myself points that says more than them. So I win fair. Well, you don't win, but that's, but you do host the next one because you already won, but this is not another win just to be clear for the host. I can't think I call it a win, right? You know what? You can, but it goes on last season. This is the after today. A new season is begun. That means I made last place by less than. Yeah. Yeah. So it has no effect on anything, but you can have a win. You have the last win of last season. That's the one thing I can say about last season is I at least got one win at the end. Yeah. Who won? Oh, I bet the subreddit knows. I know it's not me. There is. Oh, where is it? There is a person who does update every week now. They do update the charts. Oh, is that actually? No. Yes. As of that one, America versus Europe, I might have eaked it 37 to 36 with either 36. No, wait, you're 31. Oh, I bet the 30s. Yeah, you're in the 30s. You weren't that far behind. Oh, it felt like it. I had nose that in two months. Wait, who posted that? I can't find it. Where to go? It's in the comments of the America versus Europe. Right, right, right, right. They do it in the comments. Right, right, right, right, right. Five, two. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Far right or six, five, nine, two, I will. I will concede that I trust their numbers. They seem to be very thorough. I think they do an honorable job. So in that case, the final score is Mark 37, Bob 36, Wade 32. Can I just say I really love that they keep statistics on the season? Mark, Mark has 37. I have 36, Wade 32. But Wade has so few wheel spin points that it's not surprised. I've gotten 717 points off of wheel spins. Mark has gotten 677. Wade has 604 wheel spin points on the season. No, without wheel spin points. Oh, I read those backwards. Oh, Wade has the most. Wade has the most wheel spin points. You got 60. And I got 51 and Mark got 49. Yeah. So he's an outlier. I, I depend on the wheel. I only, you just suck. Yeah. Well, at least I can declare myself a winner. But that means I lost on wins, but I had the most points on the season. I had 700. I had 40 more points than Mark did on the season, which I think goes to show that I'm not that low of a score. Am I because it if I'm scoring a weight scoring, but both of us think Wade doesn't deserve points. That's true. Yeah. I left as one thing I've learned is that also I really like that they kept the number of times on the bonus number of bonus spins. 46 three spins, 35 two spins, 24 one spins, those are supposed to have an equal chance on the wheel that we spend that is weighted. It's weighted per choice. It's like it incrementally gives it another chance. I get the cup. You do. Congratulations, Mark, on winning that season. One of these seasons, we're totally going to actually, you know what, if there was a season we were going to, I should, we should do the cup. This I should send you an actual trophy. We'll make one. Maybe the congressional budget will go towards getting us a goddamn trophy. Who's won the previous seasons? I don't even know who our seasonal winners have been. I think we've each won once. Yes. I think that's true actually at a four. Well, so the first season is like the pre video era, which I don't know if we had people tracking that so closely and it was kind of a whole different kind of wild west compared to the more structured season, but we did have winners, but I don't know. But I think in the last three years, it's been each of us has one. I think that's right. Because I think you won the last one, didn't you, Wade? I couldn't tell you. I don't remember. I've at least won one. I know I won one of them. I think I won two years ago, and I think Mark won the first season post video era. I don't recall, but someone out there will tell us some some of it. Defend one of us. How much is choked on my cop drop? Bob, you're immortal. You don't want to lose that point. Just immediately kicked off the podcast if I die embarrassing. I couldn't ever. At my funeral, I expect you to come busting in a stadium full of weeping mourners. It's celebrating my life and Mark and Wade just, he's off the show. He's not takedown the banners. He's not one of us. We just graffiti the headstone with shame. If you don't do it, I'll haunt your dicks. All of our dicks? The back you'll be alternating weekends or something. You know, it would be like child custody situation. All right, well, that said, no winter speeches, no loser speeches. That's our constitution. So congrats to us for five years. We've done it. We've made episodes. We've stuck with it for five years. I am so sick of you guys. I can't wait to be over with this. He's not joking. These shirts might be probably gone. They're probably already gone. In this one, we are doing it slightly differently. The 4xLs appear to be sold out. Never fucking mind. I don't know. Look, I don't know. I give you a point for that if I could. But it's funny. Anyway, yeah, distraughtable.shop. Go. It's there. You can get the stuff. Get the stuff. Get the stuff. If you haven't already, go follow Bob at my skirmark at Markiplier me at minion 7777 or Lord minion 7777. There was a post that told me I didn't even know how many sevens were in my name. So I want to make sure I got it right that time. This is distraughtable. All of the podcasts. Keep up with us. Check out the discord. Check out the right it. Check out the merch. And I guess I'll have another banger episode for you next time where the points will mean a lot more. Until then, podcast. Out.