The comparison trap and how its keeping you stuck | BYF SERIES #8

(upbeat music) - Hello, my beautiful humans. Welcome to the last episode of the Build Your Foundation. Series, okay, this episode is all about focus, okay? 'Cause y'all keep losing it. Okay, so if we wanna feel the most empowered we've ever filled within ourselves, okay? We need to stop fucking watching others. Okay, we need to put the blinders on and we need to begin watering out our own grass, okay? And I am so fucking serious, like I could not be more serious. I could not be more serious. Also, something else I'm very serious about is how the hell is at the middle of September? End of September, middle, yeah. I'm just looking at when I'm releasing this episode. Like, the end of September is near, okay? Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way. Oh, I found it, it's around the corner. Okay, sand is nearly here, so don't be a naughty little girl and continue watering someone else's grass. Let's start watering our fucking own so Santa can actually have a really nice place to land when he comes to give us our gifts, okay? Really serious. The comparison trap. All right, let's talk about it, okay? And this is where we're ending this series because it is the last bit of the brick so we can start to build our house and it starts to thrive and it starts to grow. The comparison trap gets a lot of people. And I've spoken about this many, many times before, it's not a bad thing. Comparison's not a bad thing, but most of you are letting it dictate your reality. Okay, this is why it's becoming a bad thing and do I blame social media for a lot of this shit? Yeah, fucking do. Yeah, I do. I do. And the fact that it really kills me, it's really weird duality kind of thing of like I use social media for my business but I also would like pray that it disappears tomorrow. So like, that doesn't make sense to me, but I know I'd figure it out. And if there's one thing, I'd just, yeah, take me back to when we just had little nock ears. That was life. Think about life then, how fucking good was it? Oh, life's good now too. But social media is ruining a lot of things. It really is, but that's still a choice. That is still a choice of whether you let it or not, whether you got sucked in to the bullshit. Conspiracy theory is what I did like. Whoa, we're going in a wrong direction again. Not conspiracy theories. Comparison, I don't know why my brain went there when I went to say comparison. Comparison in the form of inspiration and allowing others to be a complete permission slip for you doing better for yourself is a good thing. Okay, this is exactly how we all learn that there is so much more available to us that we have so much more potential that we're kind of skipping on. Every single day is we see someone else in their potential doing great things, being the running example of how good things get to be and we go, fuck, I want that cool. I'm going to start showing up like that in my life. How that's going to look is going to look different. And this is where we can start to get it a little bit skewed. But that is comparison is not necessarily a bad thing. It can be used and is used. It can be used for really empowering yourself. But where things go wrong is that you compare yourself to someone else and become entitled. Okay, thinking that their results are yours to have tomorrow. You forget that there is a lot going on behind the scenes that you don't see within that person's life. Yet you think you know everything about this person and that their results should be your result without you doing anything that they've done to get that. Okay, all the work that you don't see, yet you still believe you should have it without the work that is entitlement. That is you saying, oh well, this person isn't experiencing what I'm experiencing so it just couldn't happen. No, you are becoming entitled. You are also now playing victim to your circumstances just like that other person. Someone pointing the finger at you doesn't know you from a fucking bar of soap, they don't know you. They don't know the things you're never getting behind the scenes. They don't know the things that is happening in your life just as much as you don't know much about the next person. It's just a choice whether they choose to play victim to it or not or they choose to rise above it and it becomes the reason why they're doing the things. Okay, someone else's excuses is another person's reason why. And I know that deeply true to my core in the cells of my body, I know that. Okay, when we speak about grief and a lot of people use grief when they play victim to it and everyone else is like everyone's navigating it in their own way, but I know for a fact people will continue to play victim to it and they'll use it as a reason why they can't. Yet I can guarantee you when you use it as a reason why you do life starts to become better. And that is something that I personally have navigated myself, I don't want this to become a reason why I don't, I don't want it to control me. I don't want it to dictate my life. I want to use it as a reason why I do, why I make that person proud. Okay, the person I've been watching over me, my mum watching over me, why I make her proud. That's the reason why. So I don't choose to use it as a victim. So this is the entitlement of looking at, okay, all this person doesn't have this, this, this and this. No, you're becoming, you're using this to play a victim of oh, I couldn't have those results because I've got these things going on. No, you're just not choosing to show up and put in the work. You're comparing yourself to someone else's circumstances thinking it leads to look the exact same. And it doesn't. You're just not finding the pieces of the areas and the places in your life where you are wasting your time or where you could be showing up better. You're not willing to look there because you're too busy sitting on the fence, watching someone else and playing victim to your circumstances. You're not in there in the game trying to figure it all out. So that's where things go wrong. Is you start to compare yourself to someone else and become entitled thinking their results are yours to have tomorrow. This is where comparison can take a really toxic turn. The next thing is comparing your day one to someone else's day one hundred, okay? You need to start somewhere, that's a fact, okay? That person at day hundred also had a day one, okay? Regardless, like it doesn't matter how shit you are or whatever it is, you've got to start somewhere. Like you actually have to, that's an actual fact. So if you don't start, you won't ever get better. Ever, you won't ever reach day one hundred because you've fucking running through day one again and again and again and again and again because I'll start Monday, I'll start again Monday. I'll start again next week, I'll start again here. Ah, you know, okay, if you don't start, you won't ever get better. Most people out there saying, oh, it's too hard after trying for two weeks. When the person they've been watching and comparing themselves to has been taking action for years, years. Izzy, how do you, I want to look like you, I want to have the lifestyle like you have, like how do you do that, how are you so consistent? I've been doing it for 10 plus fucking years. I haven't been perfect throughout that entire time. I failed more times than you've probably tried. That's what you need to understand. Is out people out there being afraid of failure, not understanding that the people that have success have failed more times than they've tried? Are you willing to confront that part of yourself that is not willing to fail because, oh, if it makes me feel not worthy, no actually complete opposite the reason why you don't feel worthy is because you aren't actually trying. And every time you do try and fall flat on your ass, you don't pick yourself back up again and continue. You quit. That's connected to your worth. You trying and failing, isn't actually connected to your worth whatsoever. The fact that you quit is, so your day one, someone else is day 100. You're comparing yourself to day 100 saying, oh my god, I wish I could have all those results tomorrow, not realizing they started at day one and they've been climbing for a really long time. Next part is comparing timelines, which is kind of the same thing, day one, day 100, comparing timelines. Okay, all of our paths are different. All of our lives are different. The only thing in your control is what's ahead from this day forward. The next minute, the next hour, the next day, the next week, the next month, that is all that you can focus on. That's in your control. You cannot go back. You cannot change what has happened. You can only make a different decision moving forward. That is what's in your control. There is always going to be people in front of you. Always, there are always going to be people in front of you at all stages. Okay, there's always going to be people better than you. There's always going to be people further ahead than you. There's always going to be people when I'm talking like day timelines in terms of, like, oh, this person's such a successful this, whatever picture, whatever popped into your head, this person's doing so well in this. Cool. Yeah, that person's probably been doing it for a little bit longer. Letting that stop you from starting, though, is so, if I can silly, is so silly. Letting the fact that there is people in front of you, let's stop you from starting is the silliest thing ever because time's going to go no matter what. Three months is going to go past no matter what. You could be three months further down the track than you were from making a better decision of saying I'm going to start now. Two years is going to go past and you're going to say two years has gone past. Think about the last two years and how quick those have gone. Imagine if you started two years ago. Cool, use that energy and say, fuck, I don't want to be feeling the feeling I'm feeling right now. Two years ahead. of time. So I'm going to take the lesson of shit. Two years has just gone that quickly, even five years, think of five years. It's just gone so quickly. I don't want to be feeling what I'm feeling right now in another five years time. So I'm going to make a different decision today that I didn't make five years ago. So the fact that someone is further ahead than you and you're comparing yourself to that and using it as an example and a reason to not start at all because I'm going to look silly and I'm going to be the newbie. I'm going to be the beginner. Yeah, you have to be. You have to be. But in three months time, you're not going to be the newbie or the beginner anymore. You're going to be three months more advanced, six months, 12 months, five years, but you have to start. Next piece is comparing bodies. Can you instead of focusing on being the strongest version of you and however that looks and loving her, you're focused on, I want to look like that person. Why? Because that will actually make me happy because she looks happy and confident and people love her. So maybe that's how I want to look, even if it means destroying my body to get there because I want the results tomorrow, not realizing that that person's been working at that physique for a really long period of time. So I'm going to destroy myself in the process to try and get there really quickly. Make it make fucking sense. Okay, everyone's going to look different. We're not all built the same. So this is why idolizing one body type is dangerous and destructive and also trying to achieve a body that takes years to build in a couple months. In a couple months, not even that, some of you wanted in two weeks and that is called impatience. That is called choosing the easy way out. That is being so short term focused that you're missing the bigger picture. Comparing bodies is probably and like there was that trend on, it's not really trend, but I keep seeing it pop up from time to time. If people being like make sure you follow the people that are the same height and weight as you and body type as you and how about just follow people who are like really fucking good at taking care of themselves? Follow people who want to be stronger, follow people who are doing better in their lives, wanting to empower you, inspire you, make you feel good, not following people that make you feel like shit. How about that? Because at the end of the day, there is not one person and one example in this world of a body where you go, "I want to look like that." No, you can absolutely feel inspired by someone and go, "Fuck, they look great." I would love to look like that in what makes sense to my body. I'm so focused on being the strongest, healthiest, most energetic version of me that I, in the process, have realized holy shit I've built myself into an absolute weapon because I've been so focused on me and the decisions I have to make on a day-to-day basis instead of watching and going, "What's she doing? What's she changing? What's she doing?" When it's a waste of time because she's in a completely different stage to you. She's in a completely different lifestyle to you. So comparing yourself to someone else and saying, "I wish, I wish, I wish." It's like me. I love CrossFit and I love the effort. I have a good friend who is very high up in, she competes in CrossFit and she's so good at it and I could sit and watch her all day long. She's like not actually five foot, but like I'm just using an example. She's shorter than me. She's much shorter than me. If I wasted my entire life hoping and wishing that I could look like her, muscle looks different on her than it does to me because I'm taller. If I spent my entire life comparing myself to her and hating the fact that I was never achieving or looking as the way she looks, I'd hate myself. I would hate myself and I would waste time instead of going, she's strong, she's energetic, she's powerful, she's an absolute fucking weapon. How about I look at the similar habits that she's doing, she's strength training, she's eating really well, she's feeling her body, she's doing all these things. You know what? How about I start to replicate that in my own life? And then, "Oh Bob Drunkle, what? Oh my god, we've landed. I'm all these days down the track because I've been so focused on me that oh, actually now I'm starting to reap the benefits of consistency. Oh, because I've actually been taking action, action, action instead of wasting my time and trying to choose habits from a real short term perspective. Okay, go back to last episode where I say when you start to realize that fitness is for life you stop worrying about how long it's going to take. Then you actually start to reap the benefits of consistency because you've actually been taking action for longer than a couple weeks. Stopping and starting every couple weeks or so, no, you've actually been doing it for a really long time. Oh my god, what happens? Now you're the person, five years down the track that someone on day one is looking at going, okay, I'm going to start today because I want to look like that on day 100. I want to feel like that on day 100. I want, you've now become the permission slip. Okay, now why this is so, so, so, so, so important is because you forget to live your own life sometimes. Okay, you spend more time watching others live theirs and you forget to actually take action in your own and action is the only thing that's going to provide results. Thinking, wishing, hoping, manifesting, affirmation your life away, journaling, praying, all these things may provide insight and a great feeling, but the only thing that is going to generate results is taking a fucking step is taking action. I know all the things I have to do, okay, will then do them, do them and apply them in a way that makes sense in your life. Okay, I also gave this example in the previous episode, speaking about how you've got your daily non-negotiable standards. Okay, they're the basic human needs for survival, right? It's what our body needs to thrive. Do those, how you apply those, how I apply them to all of my different clients' lives and situations and places are different. It looks different. If I had, it's not a cookie cutter, one fits all kind of thing, it's not. It's absolutely not. It's them coming to me and saying, this is my circumstances, this is my life and I go, okay, cool, let's start building. This is where we're going to start. This is what we're going to adjust and this is what we're going to build on over time. So it looks different. So if you spend a lot of your time trying to replicate and do it exactly as someone else does and it feels like you've got this constant resistance all the time of like, it doesn't feel right. Yeah, probably isn't. You probably need to adjust the way that you're doing it in your life so that it actually makes sense for you. Put the blinders on for a second and go inward to yourself. Okay, what is it that you actually need to focus on? How do you feel? What's a reality for you and what isn't? Then you want to start, what do you want to actually start working on? Okay, is your grass green? Oh, fuck, no, it's actually not. It's brown and dry as fuck. I can't need to start actually watering it because at the end of the day, that's the only person that matters. The only person in your life that matters is you. It doesn't matter what someone else is doing. It doesn't matter what they look like. It doesn't matter how they feel. It doesn't matter what they're doing. It doesn't matter what stage they're at. It doesn't matter if they work themselves out up from this level or they had fucking everything served them on a platter or they bought their results or they didn't or they lived this life and they live here, this person's in the country. This is in the city. This is what they do for food. This is what someone else does for food. This is this. It doesn't matter. The only thing that matters is you, your life, what makes sense for you. Applying the standards and the non-negotiables to your life, what makes sense? Okay, me personally. All right, all these standards. Cool. I'm not training to compete. Okay, I'm not an athlete. Cool. What makes sense for me for my everyday life? I can't really busy right now. So, going in the morning at 6am every single day for an hour and a half does not work for me. At all, I would not show up. I would not do it. Cool. So, three to four days a week for 30 to 40 minutes. That makes sense. Yep, that makes perfect sense. I can fit that in. These are the times I'm going to fit it in. Oh, everyone's training at 5am in the morning. Yeah, that doesn't make sense for me. I'm not going to fucking do that. Okay, I'm actually starting to focus on me and what makes sense for me. Oh, okay, right now I don't have the capacity to go to a gym. Okay, well, can I get two dumbbells? Yeah, I can. Okay, well, can you train at home and just do some dumbbell workouts at home? Yeah, I can. Okay, well, that makes sense for you. But everyone's group training at the moment. Everyone's going to rebel training in F-45 and fucking all the group training places. So, I should be doing that. No, you shouldn't be doing that. You should be prioritizing what makes sense for you to apply movement to your life. That's what makes fucking sense. There's going to be a season where adapting and making it make sense for you is where what you're going to be asking of yourself. Can you do that? Okay, the end of the day, the only person that matters is you so focus on her. That's it. Use other people for mission. Absolutely. Use people as like, you know what? Hell yeah. If she can do it, fucking oath I can do it. Absolutely. Use people as permission slips to pull you higher. Okay, when it comes to building your own standards and things like that, okay, well, what works for you? Go and try things. Okay, it might not be what you like, but you don't know until you try it. And it doesn't matter if someone else loves it and you don't, you don't have to like it because someone else does. Okay, be your own person for fuck's sake. Why are we all trying to be the same? Why when someone says I don't like that, do you say, oh, you should? No, I don't fucking like it. It's like me. I try to pretend I like running for a really long time. I don't fucking like running. I don't like it. Everyone's running a marathon. I don't want to run a marathon. I don't feel the need to. I don't want to. I'm not going to. Will I change my mind in the future? Maybe depending because I will make that decision. Right now running a marathon makes no fucking sense. Going for a run because it benefits me and it provides me with health benefits, y'all choose to do that, though, when it makes sense for me. Be your own person. Everyone goes to run clubs on Sunday, but I would rather go ride my dirt bike, yeah, fucking me too. That's what I'm going to go do. I'm going to go ride my dirt bike. I want to go do the things that make sense in my life. I don't know how you ride dirt bikes, like how could you, because I like it. You don't have to like it since that's okay. That's fine. Be your own person, same as all the other tiny little things. I made this recipe. It was so good. I didn't really like it. What do you mean? It's like the easiest thing to make. Okay, well, I've got my other ways of doing it. Cool. Perfect. Okay. Your standards are yours for a reason. Okay. They are what you need to get you where you want to be. Okay. And this is going to be different person to person. Measuring success differently to everyone's got a different version of success. Let it be. Okay. I realized I was chasing a life for a really, really long time that I didn't even want. Okay. I was because I was so consumed by others. Okay. My consumption was through the fucking roof. And I thought, oh, this is what everyone's going to being a coach, specifically in the coaching industry. This is what everyone wants to be. This is what you, if you do this, you'll actually be seen as a good coach. I got so consumed by that. And I realized, I don't want to spit at that. I don't want a bit of that. I don't even want to contribute to a bit of that. Okay. And it's because I wasn't listening to what I wanted. It wasn't listening. I wasn't listening to what made sense for me in the kind of life I wanted to live and then applying it that way. And that's the beautiful thing when you follow people who break that stigma, if it's got to look this way and this way and that way, no, it's got to look what actually makes sense to me. And I love that. I love when you get the biggest permission slip to make it work the way that you want to why because who says there's any fucking rules with this society said, yeah, fuck society. Okay. That's not the way that it needs to be. And being someone that steps outside of that and goes, I'm applying this the way that makes sense to me because I have a passionate and I want to do this. And I got told it needs to look this, this and this, no. And I love when you come across the people who are that permission. That's why I say comparisons on a bad thing because there are people out there when you follow them, you realize, oh, they're going against the grain here. And that is epic because it is showing me that the ideas and the things that I wanted to have weren't crazy at all. What I wanted to do is not crazy at all. This idea of success in my mind and the life that I wanted to live is not crazy at all because it makes sense to me. And that's really as far as I need to go with questioning that. Okay. Your life completely shifts when you start living for your own. Okay. Instead of comparing your life to everyone else, comparing yourself from day one to someone's day 100, it's understanding and going, okay. I always my life right now. Where do I want it to be? What do I need to do? What are the steps I need to take to get there? That's the only thing that fucking matters. My fitness isn't where I need to be. Okay. Well, how do I get my fitness to where I want it to be? I start taking action. How's that going to work? Cool. I need a strength train. I need to move more. And I need to eat whole foods. Okay. Amazing. What am I not doing right now? And how can I start getting myself to doing that consistently throughout the week? And that becoming a lifestyle for me. How does that make sense for me and how can I do it? In the season that I'm in, the routine that I have, the lifestyle I'm living now, how can I start to make that work for me and adjust to it over time? That's all you have to worry about. Your life will completely shift for the better when you start living for your own instead of comparing to everyone else's. The people out there that are convincing, like feeling bad for saying, for example, I want to live a quiet, simple life. And people are like, oh, why do you want to live that? That's so old school, don't have to apologize for wanting to live a quiet, simple life. You don't have to be a badass, hustle, fucking CEO, queen if you don't want to be. But if you also want to be, then run at home, sis, go for gold and you achieve that because that is possible for you. What is it that you want? And that is the best part about actually, like the best part about life is going, okay, cool. I'm sitting on my fence and I'm watching all these people do their thing, why don't I have it? Oh, because I'm not actually prioritizing any of it. I'm too busy watching someone else that I didn't realize I can actually be creating the life that makes sense for me. That is the best part about it is you get to choose what makes sense for you and you don't have to explain that for a fucking second. That's for sure. I know one consistent thing that everyone should be doing in their lives and that's honoring the fuck out of their body, that is taking care of their body, that is becoming the strongest, most energetic, confident version of themselves, not from a place of abandonment, depletion and destruction, but from a place of inspiration, empowerment, strength, and being well fed. Okay, if you want to achieve the physique, if you want to achieve a level of strength and fitness, watching someone else do the works, not going to get you there. I'll tell you that for free. So this gets me to the reflection takeaway action part of this episode, reflection piece. If no one else's journey was visible, what would success look like to you? If no one else's lifestyle was visible, what would success look like to you? Really start to ponder this. Okay, if I couldn't see what everyone else was doing, what would I want to do in my life? If everyone else could not see my life on a day to day basis, this is the whole social media thing, if everyone couldn't see what I was doing on a day to day basis, would I still want to be living the life that I'm chasing? Ask yourself that question. If everything just went to shit tomorrow and we lost all connection, I'd still want to live the life that I'm living because I've created it for me. I'm creating it for me. That's where you start to get a whole nother level of confidence and empowerment within yourself. Take away action. Take a break from comparison for the next 48 hours, okay? And obviously, it's easier said than done. But I want you to unfollow or mute any accounts that leave you feeling behind and instead write down three wins from your own journey no matter how small. Now, if you really struggle, really struggle to do this, a multitude of things, I'll go through the list. So, if take a break from comparison, if you struggle to do this, put some really hard boundaries with social media on for a second, get one of those apps where you can block it for a day, get off social media for a day, give yourself a chance to have a break when you are on it and you're consuming. Take note of any accounts that make you feel like shit, that make you feel rushed, that make you feel like it should be anything other than focusing on the way you feel. mute them, unfollow them, whatever. If you really struggle to find wins, I want you to do this from a really empowering place. When you write, struggle to write down your three wins, cool, no worries, say you've been in a really big season of abandoning yourself and you know that and you're feeling the disappointment within yourself for that, I don't want you to run away from that again. I want you to lean into that. I want you to write down the things that you haven't been doing. I want you to write down the emotions connected to that saying I haven't been doing these things. I feel like there are no wins in my life. I can probably guarantee that are so dig deep and find some. There are little wins everywhere but if you feel like there's not, I'm in a big season of abandoning myself, I want to turn it around, this is how you do it. Write them down, write the emotions down that are associated with that and say thank you. Say thank you for showing me exactly where I get to do better and what choices in my hands because if we'd run away from those emotions again for the 50th time, you're going to re-loop back to this place again. To be an emotionally intelligent human, we need to feel all emotions so you need to learn to sit with your disappointment, you need to learn to sit with the shame of abandoning yourself for the last couple of months or however long it's been. You also need to practice kindness and compassion, say you've gone through a really hard season, you've gone through a shift, it's a different season to what you'll usually have experienced. Give yourself the kindness and compassion and go wow, I haven't actually experienced this before and I'm just learning to navigate something new. I want to be someone that's able to navigate new seasons without abandoning myself in the process and it's starting with understanding and having compassion to yourself that you're not meant to feel good all the time. This is the thing about social media too, is a lot of people think everyone feels so happy and good all the time. No, but we're not really going to capture the really hard bits because it's really not nice to consume that but also sometimes it might help. It might help people really understand that everyone's not feeling good 24/7 and that's not the point. It's not about feeling good 24/7, it's about not abandoning yourself when you feel bad. That's the point. So if you really want to be someone that is able to navigate harder seasons and not abandon themselves in the process, it starts with you sitting with the discomfort of the fact that you've done it. And being like, you know what, I can finally sit here and accept that yes, that was me. It wasn't work. It wasn't my kids. It wasn't my partner. It wasn't family. It wasn't all these things. It was the fact that I took for granted the choices that I had. Yeah, that makes me feel like shit. Have a vomit. Makes you feel so sick to the point you want to vomit because it makes you that sick to admit those things to yourself. Cool. Go have a little vomit. I always say to my clients, get the bucket. Does that make you sick admitting that to yourself? Yeah, get the bucket. Have a little vomit. Have your moment because you need it. You need to sit with it and you need to accept it. Why? Because then you can say thank you. You can say thank you to yourself for being able to look at the parts of where you've let yourself down because there's only up from there. Thank you for showing me exactly where I can start to do better because beforehand I ignored these emotions so I was never giving myself a chance to see where I could do better. I was running away from it and I was always looping back. So thank you for giving me the opportunity to see that and I know that none of this is attached to my capability or my worth. It's showing me exactly where I have the power to do more and I do have exactly that. Taking it one step at a time and then that's where you don't go to the comparison loop. You don't go all this person to this and this way. Today is my day one. Tomorrow is my day two. Take it a day at a time. Get the support where you need. Absolutely. That absolutely helps to have someone in your corner but you need to learn to sit with it because if you don't you won't be able to see where you can be doing better and you'll always be pointing the finger at all the other places where it's the reason why you can't do it. When reality it's actually you and that's probably the most empowering thing is taking your control back. Alrighty my loves. That is the end of the build your foundation series. I'm going to have to think of another series because you guys have been thriving and loving this series. So I feel like it's a really cool way to deliver and talk about different things instead of not like trying to go build your foundation and it's one episode. This is a really cool way to kind of break them all up. So I actually really loved it and I loved the way that this worked. So there will be a few episodes like in between this series but I definitely think I'm going to do another series because yeah I actually loved that. That was really fun. Anyway my loves. If this episode hit home and you want to keep these conversations going don't forget to hit the follow button and share this episode. It really helps me out and it helps me get to a place where I can start to expand these episodes. I can start to do better. We can start to take this to the next level because I love the idea of that. So following it, sharing it really does help and boost this podcast to the next level. And I appreciate every single one of you that do it as always. This is the growth mindset podcast. I'll chat to you guys in the next episode. Until then keep tracing your highest self like she owes you your happiest life because she does. You just got to put the work in. It's up to you. Take your control back. Love you, bye.