The Blockchain Strategy | Eps 13

We do need to be authentic and it is okay for men to have bad days and it is okay for you to express your emotions in a constructive and positive way. There's a lot of people that give this concept of stoicism wrong. That it's the suppression of emotion. That's not how I interpret stoicism. To me it's understanding your emotions and then formulating a response or behavior that will move your life in the right direction. Kid, what's up man? Great to have you here on this Friday afternoon, trying to close out the week and we've got a big, big lacrosse tournament. My two oldest boys are big into lacrosse and they won their first game last night and my oldest had 10 points so he had four goals and six assists so he tore it up yesterday. He did really well. And he almost killed a kid which was kind of hilarious. It's funny because since it's a tournament, the team that was playing next after them was on the sideline that the teams aren't. And lacrosse, both teams are on the same side of the field. So the other side of the field is completely open and so they were warming up and stuff on the other side. And lacrosse is cool because for the most part teams are really cool to each other and they support each other and they like to jack jaw of course and they're competitive but they also like to cheer each other on and my oldest Brecken laid this kid out. Clean check, laid this, I mean absolutely, like picked him up off the ground, decleated him. He fell down, he whacked the back of his head and he kind of just like went limp. And all the guys on the sideline are like, "Ooh, that was awesome." And the kids just sprawled out, almost unconscious, laid there and he did get up on his own volition but I was like, "I think my son just killed a kid." Yeah, I remember one of my older boys, he played lacrosse in his first year. It was funny because he's enjoying it. Like he's like, "This is fun." And then he learns that he can actually check people as long as he's holding the stick correctly. And then also like his face lit up. He's like, "Ah, like his enjoyment and lacrosse drastically changed once he realized he could do that." Because at first he was getting it analyzed and stuff and he was like, "This sucks." And then he realized like, "Oh, I just need to hold my stick correctly." I mean that's all it is. Make sure the other player has the ball and then you can just whack him as hard as you want. And just about anyway, like you can't hit him in the head, you gotta have your hands together. There's things like that, but you could poke check him, literally jab him in the stomach or the ribs, like there's all sorts of stuff that you can. They call it a crowbar and Brecken did this to a kid last year. And I did think the kid was dead or paralyzed. But he got a crowbar is when you get your stick under their arms, the player's arms, and you lift them in the air. And so this is what he did. He got it and he put it under his arms, lifted him in the air, and basically power bomb the kid. And the kid just crumbled, just like withered and wilted. And I was behind the goal because I was taking pictures. I'm like, "Oh no, that kid is seriously hurt." And he did. He started to literally crawl off the field. And he eventually got back up and got back in the game. But man, Brecken can be a. Both of them actually. Brecken and my second Eli can be real menaces and it's really fun to see. Brecken utilizes some of those powerlifting techniques on the lacrosse field. Hooks it all under his legs, man. He's got a huge leg, a huge leg, a huge butt, and he can just generate a lot of power from those things. So he knows how to use it. Oh man, that's good. Is the tournament all day today and tomorrow, like just a three day kind of event? Three days. So they've got one game this afternoon. It's Friday right now. Has it this recording and then Saturday tomorrow. They've got two or three games all day tomorrow. So it'll be a busy weekend. It'll be a lot of fun. Yeah, I love it, man. I love it. Well, we got some good. We got some listener questions. I was just going to say that. Yeah, we got some good questions. So let's just kind of chat into these. So Danny Skolnik. He says, "How much AI chat GPT assistance do each of you use to write your material in emails, marketing, or social media?" And he's asking around writing materials. Maybe we just expand it a little bit. Even AI use for other things, even not content Christian. I actually don't use. I've never really used AI for content creation. I don't make a social media post using AI. I don't think I ever have. I have been accused of that. It's interesting because I had a post a week or two ago and I used a hyphen and it was an appropriate use of a hyphen. And somebody had to use this in all the time. All the time. Yeah. Right. So somebody commented back and we're like, "Oh, that's AI." I'm like, "What makes you say that?" And she said, "Well, because of a hyphen, that's not how people talk." I'm like, "Well, that is how people talk." And that is the appropriate use of a hyphen. And this is not AI generated. She's like, "Oh, I'm sorry." Like she was cool about it. She's like, "It's so weird that we even have to consider whether something was created or whether it was generated in AI." But I don't use it that way. I think it's a little disingenuous, but I have used it for researching podcast guests. That's been a tremendous use for me, is podcast guests. Also generating some additional ideas or fleshing out a Friday field notes. And I might come up with a topic and say, "Okay, this is the angle. Give me a couple of bullet points that I hadn't considered." Or, "Can you give me some statistics on this talking point?" So I've definitely used it for that. And then just clarification. Even if I see a post that I'm from somebody else that I question, I fact check with AI. And so, like, "Hey, is this true or what about this is true or am I missing something here?" I'll even put my own filter, my own comments and commentary through it. And I'll say, "Okay, what did I get right? What did I get wrong?" And then it's kind of interesting. There's some unique perspective there that I enjoy. Yeah. I use this similar. I mean, I'll usually create content. And then I'm like, "Were this better?" Or, like, I remember I did a keynote a couple months ago. And it was just so typical keynote BS. I'm so amazing, but I'm like, "I don't like it." And so I put the whole thing into chat GPT and said, "Re-write this bio in a way that's funny." And I pokes out my elements of my youth and my upbringing and have fun with it. And it came up with some clever things. I'm like, "Oh, I like that." And then I'd fine-tune it. So I guess that is kind of content creation I've used it for. But it's interesting, right? Because, like, the person that made the comment about the hyphen, this happened to Vanderbilt University. It was actually one of our clients, one of my clients actually a couple years ago. And there was like a shooting on campus or something. And they got a lot of heat because they had a public announcement that they released around the shooting. And it's interesting because what they said could be true for them, right? They could say, "Yes. This represents us correctly." But they utilized AI to generate the response. And people's human nature is what? Well, it must not be true if you generated it. And so there's an interesting element here, maybe a lesson for us to realize that like, "Yes, we can automate things. We can create things." But as humans, we still think it means something. If it comes from Ryan versus if it's generated, we're the Ryan agrees with it or not. And it's just an interesting concept for us to consider as we utilize these tools in day-to-day interactions. I think it is interesting, but it's not surprising. I mean, we're all tribal. And that's really what it comes down to. So anytime there's something that's off, just a little off, it's like, "Oh, threat. That's not part of our tribe. We need to. That's ostracized. We're getting rid of that." So it could be AI when somebody sees AI that are like, "That's not how Ryan talks." Threat, not interested. Another arena that you see this in is, and we'll see this more and more. And I think it will give betters probably not the right word, but a little bit more realistic, is robotics. Humanoid robots. There's going to be such a level of distrust, especially upfront and disdain, because I know that's not a human being. Like even this thing with Jim Carey, like, have you seen this thing going on with Jim Carey? Yeah, what? I think it's Jim Carey. I think he just had a lot of surgery at once. And it either hasn't healed right or it wasn't done very well. But the amount of people that are like, "Oh, that's a clone." And they actually believe that. Or that's a mask. It's threatening. Subconsciously, it's threatening. That person is not like us. Therefore threat. Therefore not part of our tribe. And this is why this is the power, I think, of authenticity, because you can trust it. You say, "Oh, that's authentic." Whether it's inferior or not, you know what you're getting because you believe that that's aligned with that individual. When there's a lack of authenticity, whether it's visual like that or in content creation, you start questioning who you're getting. And is it really them or not? It's not really about the quality of it as much as the trust of it and trust through authenticity is important. Well, I think this is, and look, I don't want to get into the weeds on this about like, whether you like them or don't like them politics or not. But this is part of the charm. And again, just here what I'm saying, like, let's not make this a part of the charm of Trump. Now, a lot of people are like, "He's a liar. He's a piece of shit." And all that could be true. I don't know. But what I do know is that he speaks his mind and the thought toward filter is broken, which is part of the charm. You know what you're going to get. And so when he opens his mouth and he makes fun of whoever he decides to make fun of for the day, you're like, "Yeah, that's Trump. At least I can appreciate that he's speaking what's on his mind, even if I don't agree with what he's saying." Totally. What, and this is like, presidential, well polished, don't know if that's really what they feel and how they communicate or authentic, egotistical guy. People trust the one, right? Because they trust that it's him, right? And it's consistent and it's not polished, right? And that's the power of authenticity. I mean, this is crazy. For me, it's an opinion, right? It's not subjective. Everybody has different versions of what they think is authentic. But this is part of the reason I kind of scoff when people say that Obama was such a great orator. I don't think he was a great orator at all. Great writers. I think I don't even think that. I don't think he really ever said anything that was like very compelling or inspiring. And it all sound the same. It all sound flat. Like there was no dilemma, no conflict in what he said. Like he was not a great speaker that way. And it made it seem just stuffy. Now, there's millions of people who would disagree with me. And that's fine. And it might be my own political bias that changes my interpretation of him. But I just thought he was very disingenuous. And you know, years ago, this was a long time ago. I was, I was probably, I don't know, 20 or 21 years old. And I was working in the mall at Journey Shoestor. And I don't know why I remember this. It is interesting. There was this young woman who worked across the mall at Clairs, the jewelry store Clairs. And we, like we would talk on our breaks and like, I don't know, Flurder or whatever, you know, across the stores or whatever, right. And she said to me one time, she's like, I don't trust you. And she's kind of joking, but also kind of not. And I'm like, what do you mean? She's like, you're always happy. And I was like, okay, so you don't trust me because of that. She's like, yeah, because I don't know if you're faking it. And I remember having this conversation. I was like, well, what? What would make you believe that I was being real? She's like, if you had a bad day and you actually were angry or upset or bothered. And I can see that you were having a bad day. I'm like, that's interesting. I mean, that was 25 years ago. And I still remember that conversation. And she wasn't being mean spirited. She was just making an observation. And I thought it was really, really interesting. Yeah. This is part of the reason I think when it comes to this is we do need to be authentic. And it is okay for men to have bad days. And it is okay for you to express your emotions in a constructive and positive way. There's a lot of people that get this concept of stoicism wrong that it's the suppression of emotion. To me, it's understanding your emotions and then formulating a response or a behavior that will move your life in the right direction. But I can use emotion very powerfully. You know, you think it's some of the greatest orators that we've known whether it's Abraham Lincoln with the Gettysburg address or Martin Luther King. I have a dream even to Tony Robbins when he does a seminars. You don't, don't for a second think that they don't know how to use emotional hooks to get you vested in their vision. Of course, that's what they're doing. So when you're having a bad day, I actually think it's worthwhile to you get home and you're like, hey kids, just want to let you know I'm having a bad day. Today didn't go well because of this and that and this and I might seem a little off tonight. And I just wanted to let you know I've got to do some processing and tomorrow we're getting back to work and we're getting things figured out, but just want to keep you in the loop. I actually think that's a healthy expression of emotion because now your kids are going to see, oh, dad has bad days and most importantly, he knows how to regulate them and your kids and your wife and the people in your life need to see that you can be emotional, but you can also regulate the emotional emotion properly. Yeah, totally or they end up growing up and going, man, I'm mad all the time something's wrong with me. What's wrong with because what's wrong with me because dad never dealt with this and it's like, oh, sorry son, I never actually involved you and the whole time I was pissed off and I just managed it really well. So it's their way of modeling it, right? Is there any other, any other tools for Danny that you utilize on the AI front? I mean, the podcast I'm assuming editor utilizes AI to for clips and video and graphics as well or no? Yeah, graphics. I even pull some graphics for Instagram on I use mid journey for that. Josh uses graphics or I don't know what program AI he uses, but yeah, he pulls different clips and features and I don't really I don't know I don't know that side of things those guys are doing it. I'm sure, but AI now I mean, I could take a podcast like this I could drop it even into Riverside, which is what we're using and Riverside will generate 45 second to 60 second clips automatically. It's a little wonky. They take out the umbs and the a's and the silent and they like silence out some of the background noise, which makes the volume up and it still has room for improvement on Riverside. But it's pretty impressive what it can do. Yeah, totally. I've started utilizing Claude. Have you heard of Claude yet? I've heard of it. Yeah, but I never used it. Pretty pretty amazing. Like what is what is what is it do think think of it as the gap between what a developer used to do from a process automation perspective and Claude. You could utilize Claude to automate systems and connections and hooks into different things and process data. It's actually super intelligent. It's impressive and it will actually give you the breakdown of what it's processing. So like when you ask something, you're like, all right, I need to do this. Then it like you'll see the text like, oh, well this and this and like I literally had it. I had I utilized it yesterday or not yesterday or the day before to create a leadership gap assessment for me based upon research data. And it literally created the assessment created all the HTML necessary for the form to work correctly generated the hooks for to integrate within my existing systems. And I just plopped it into the website. Yeah, it's crazy. It was it was wild. And at one point the code broke. The the submit button broke. And I was like, and I just said, hey, the submit buttons no longer working. And then it's like, and then it's like, let us let me evaluate the code. And the right patch or whatever. Yeah, there's a there's a bug in the code. Let me fix this code. This bracket was missing. I've updated it. Now test it. And I test it like it's working. I was like, dude, that's crazy. Yeah, that's amazing. Yeah. Wild time. There's a guy Dan Martell that I follow. I'm trying to actually get him on the podcast, but he's got. He talks a lot about AI and how to use it properly for business. So if you're looking for another cool podcast, Dan Martell. He's a he's a coach. He's very successful. But he talks a lot about how to use it properly. And that's where I learn about a lot of this stuff. Yeah. All right, David doll. So this is kind of a funny question because I'm like, I'm wondering if our response for David back in what July of last year or actually a couple years ended up being bad advice or not. I don't remember how our advice was. He says, but Ryan and Kip, good morning, gentlemen. I've probably asked a question regarding staying together for the kids, which you guys tackled on the podcast back in 2023. You both gave similar answers, which I took into consideration and implanted in my relationship fast forward. Just last month I ended the relationship with my ex. So I'm like, no, shit, did we was that good advice or not, right? He says, I ended the relationship with my ex. Our kids are 14 and five years old now. I've had custody of them during this time. As I have a family attorney with the ball rolling for court ordered custody with them. Now my question is this Ryan. How did you stay afloat? Physically, mentally and emotionally while going through your divorce, I'm learning firsthand the intricacies of similar situation involving children. Do you have any advice? Yeah, I've got lots of advice. You know, for better or worse, I guess based on the question you may have asked, I don't think we, I don't, I can't remember what he asked, but I assume based on the way he's framing the question that well, I can't remember what we what we gave as far as feedback. But based on the way he framed the question, I would say that, hey, you need to try to make it work. Yeah. If not for the kids for your own well being because you need to be able to look the man in the mirror and say, I did everything I could and I'm still in integrity. If I had to guess what I said, that's probably what I said because that's what I believe even now. That and that may result in a divorce or not, you can't control the other party, but you control you. So it matters how you show up. And that's what I think that's really important to know is that I could give you the best advice that was ever given in a history of mankind and it could still not work out. Yeah. And and we have to be aware of that because we as men want our agency, we want our autonomy, we want our sovereignty. Are we willing to acknowledge that others want that as well? That could mean your wife or your kids or clients and business partners and every other person in your life. If you want that, then you have to respect the fact that they probably do too and they can make decisions that are not always in alignment with what you would like to see and it sucks, but it is what it is. Our goal as men when it comes to these types of things is to stack the deck in our favor. That's it. For example, there's going to be a percentage of men listening to this podcast who over the next 10 to 20 years or longer are going to be diagnosed with cancer. Flat out. And some of it might be self-imposed. You know, if you chew tobacco or smoke, okay, well, you're increasing your risks of cancer. And others, I mean, I had a friend. I don't want to get too specific, but I had a friend in the military who, you know, he never, never drank, never smoked, never chewed tobacco. And when we were in Iraq, he actually ended up having cancer in the back of his mouth. And I think it went down to his throat. And if I remember correctly, they had to take out part of his tongue. He had to learn how to retalk. Part of his, I don't know, like he had skin grafts and it was crazy. And this was a guy that was healthy. He was in shape. He took care of his body. He didn't put objects into his body that just happened. So we need to come to terms with the fact that we don't have as much control over our lives as we think, but you can stack the deck. And that means to eat healthy and to get exercise and not to drink and smoke and chew and do all these other things that will certainly stack the deck against you. So David could have done everything right and still didn't work out. But okay, so there's my little rant on that. I mean, how do you stay afloat? Really, there's a couple of things that I think are at the core of how you stay afloat. So these are not in any order, but number one is to get really reflective about your part to play in the relationship. And I know that's going to be really painful because there's going to be things that you're going to have to sit with in guilt and shame. But you can't move forward properly until you address that. And I see and I was guilty of this a little bit. I see a lot of men fall into this where they don't actually address the problems and then they get into a relationship and the same problem comes up and then a new relationship and the same problem comes up. So at some point you got to imagine that you are the common denominator in this equation. Why does this keep coming up for you? What are you doing or not doing that's creating the problem. So yeah, you got to sit in some shit and ask yourself, what did I do? What could I have done better? How could I have showed up? How will I show up in the future? And that process is journaling. Therapy might help to some degree, you know, not as hopped up on therapy as everybody else, but therapy to some degree, self reflection, having other men in your corner that can bounce ideas off of. I've had conversations with you personal conversations about relationships. And when you speak to me, it just sounds so simple like, duh, why did I think of that? Well, the reason is is because I'm emotionally attached to the outcome of the scenario and you are not. Which means that you can see it in a way, a perspective that I just can't see myself. And this is the power of having other men in your corner who you allow to speak into you and you accept not blindly, but accept what they have to share. Another thing is I always say, make yourself the project. Men love projects. We absolutely love projects. We like to build. We like to work with our hands. We like to find problems. We like to work in the yard. We like to clean thing. Like we just, we like to fix the truck. We like to build the, we just love projects. That's in our nature. So make yourself the project. If you're 240 pounds right now and you should be sitting right around 200, okay, project number one, I've got to lose 40 pounds. How do I do that? Reverse engineer? Okay, I've got to eat healthy. How do I do that? Oh, okay, I've got to do some meal prep on Sundays. Cool. That becomes part of your routine. Every Sunday, you're doing meal prep and then you're going to eat healthier or I've got to come up with a workout program. And so you spend some time in Chad G PT or you hire a trainer and put together a workout program. Whatever you do, you just make yourself the project and you dive fully into what you're doing. Too many people don't go all the way. I was thinking about this concept. I'm really rambling here, but I hope this helps. When I was in the military, I was in in artillery, artillery, artillery, excuse me. And there was a term that we would use when we wanted to destroy an enemy position or a movement or something and it was called fire for effect. And fire for effect is a command that we would give to our guns. And those guns would then fire maximum effective dose to suppress the enemy. And I got thinking about this yesterday, we don't do this in our own lives. What most of us do is fire for in effect. Like just enough where it seems like we might be doing something or we might be perceived as if we're moving the needle and people congratulate us for nothing really. Really, it's like masturbation. It feels really good, but ultimately doesn't get the job done. And what I want guys to do is I want them to fire for effect. Man, go all in on something, pick something and be the best at it. Jiu Jitsu, training, painting, photography, carpentry, dancing. I don't care what it is. Pick something and just pour yourself into it. And you'll learn a lot from that. So you know, there's a few things. Make yourself the project. Do some self reflection. Force yourself to be around other good people. And stay in the fight. Yeah, what thoughts do you have? Rind them around letting go of the expectations. I think sometimes that stops guys from dealing in reality. Right. Like why shouldn't have to and it shouldn't be this way. And so what advice would you have around just letting go of of those judgments and preconceived notions of the way it should have. The way it should have ended up, right? Yeah. I think that just takes time. Part of it. Part of it comes when you heal. And then you start to realize, oh, I'm in a much better position than I was before. And if you're in a worse position than you were before, it's going to be really difficult for you to let go of the way it should have been. You're going to feel slighted. You're going to feel regret and sorrow and shame and guilt. You're going to feel animosity because somebody took something away from you. Yeah. So if you if you really learn to heal, then you can go back and say, okay, that wasn't ideal. And if I could do it over again, I would. I can't. But my condolence is or my my consolation is that I'm a better man today than I was. I'm making more money. I'm in a new relationship. I'm connected deeply with my children. I'm happier. I'm sober. Like whatever the thing is, it's it's pretty hard to look at the past and be frustrated when you're in a better spot than you were before. And I think, you know, I might be able to share a lot of tactics and everything with you. But at the end of the day, your life has to be better than what it was for you to get over what you were dealing with. Yeah, grow and learn from it. I love it. One of the one of the courses that you have in the iron council right now is divorce not death. Maybe what does that look like for guys that aren't part of the iron council. Obviously, you know, you know, David, if you don't know, now you know, divorce not death is a course in the I see. So you should be actually attending that. That's obviously a great resource. But what does that resource look like for guys outside of the iron council Ryan? Yeah. So essentially what divorce not death is, it's an eight week course that you can go through. It's it's not it will be self guided at some point. But right now it's actually it's better because it's not self guided. It's done with me and the rest of the guys that are going through going through the process of divorce. You know, maybe they were just told maybe like David, they are the ones who made the decision. Maybe they're 12 months post divorce. And that's really who it's for and we go through eight modules one every week on things from new roles, new rules to hiring your legal team and protecting your rights as a father, David's dealing with that with custody right now to how to manage the financial aspect of things to how to communicate effectively as a co parent. That one of the last modules we get into is getting back into the dating space and what that looks like. And so healing that's another one like how do you heal yourself what are the thought process to get better. So we have experts come in and teach some of this stuff. It's actually really powerful. So it's open. In fact, well, as of this recording Friday, we're doing a class today is our first class. So divorce not death calm. You can get signed up for that. Or if you join the iron council, it's included in your iron council membership. Awesome. Thank you. All right. Will Pennell surface level question, right? We don't get these service level ones too often, but he's just kind of not from will. Yeah, about the about the store t shirts designs are their new designs in the works. I think we'll just look for some swag. So good. Yeah, let's do anything you want to do. So I just talked with Josh. He's he's our designer. And so he's putting together an endurance shirt based on Ernest Shackleton's ill-fated trip across the Antarctic. So that one's called endurance. That should be out in about two or three weeks. And we've got another one he just showed me yesterday called the blueprint and it's basically our logo and it's deconstructed and it's a representation of what I just said, making yourself the project. We have to build ourselves as men from the ground up when we come into this earth. We are a collection of raw ingredients and then resources ingredients potential. It's up to us initially our parents and whether or not they do a good job is to be determined. But then at some point it becomes our job to build ourselves into into a structure into something useful into something powerful into something that can stand the test of time that has legacy around it. So that's the blueprint shirt. And then I've got another one. This one will be probably a month or two out called blood sweat and tears because that's what that's what's required for you to be successful. I mean, you cannot be successful in life without literally bleeding sweating and tears like it just doesn't happen. So we've got the blood sweat and tear shirt coming out to. Okay, buying that swag store dot order of man calm. So and keep stay updated on what swag is up showing up. All right, Douglas Ed, what ideas are you willing to kill for? Interesting question. That is interesting. What ideas? Ideals, I'm sorry. Hopefully you're not killing for it. I have ideas. Ideals. Yeah. Ideals. Ideal, I mean, my family and my faith, right? Faith family country, I would say. I mean, it's as simple as that. You know, somebody. Am I my own freedom in liberty? I would say that to you. Like if your own life is at risk. Yeah. Yeah, I would I would kill to, you know, protect my own liberty. Absolutely. Yeah, I'd kill if somebody was threatening that against my kids or somebody that I love. I've also thought about like property. Would I kill for property? I don't know. I don't know. I think I guess it depends on on what like if somebody was stealing from my garage and, you know, they just like I caught them and they ran like what I shoot them or can like no, probably not. I don't know if I can just with their grabbing. But if, yeah, I mean, if they're grabbing some tools, maybe if they're grabbing, I don't know, like the meat out of my freezer, I might. Yeah, yeah. You're like all the other stuff. You're like, good riddance. Thank you. You know, I was trying to get rid of that crap for years. No, but I think that's that's it. You know, faith, country, family and my own personal liberty. I can't really think about anything that would even faith is an interesting one. Would I kill for my faith? It depends on the context, right? Like, yeah, it's hard for me to figure out a way a reason why I would need to do that. But to defend my faith. Again, that comes back to my liberty. Yeah, absolutely. If somebody's going to threaten me or my family. Yeah, I would kill for that. Absolutely. All right, Nick, Nick, would you would you add anything to the list? Kip on that. No, and not only would I not add to the list, I think that list is solid, but there's so much gray in it, right? You know, to be honest, like how often it's like, well, was I really at risk and you don't mean like and there's to be honest with you, like liberty is in that gray space too, right? Like our liberty liberties are being threatened all the time internally. And you know, I mean, where do you draw the line? And it's messy, you know, it's I think it's all tricky. Right. I mean, yeah, here's just to get a little tactical or a little visceral on that. If I'm speeding down the road at 75 miles an hour in a 45. And I get pulled over, you could argue that a police enforcing that law is infringing on my liberty. You could absolutely make that argument. So would I kill him for it? No, unfortunately, some people would. I wouldn't. So would I kill for all of my liberties? No, but certain. Yeah, absolutely. Yeah, yeah, that's good analogy. All right, Nick, Nick, Elroy, in a world where violence has never changed just the method in which it is perceived. How do you teach someone this concept? I don't really understand the point of the question. Okay, so in a world that violence has never changed only the method. How do you teach somebody that concept? Yeah. I'm trying to think. I mean, what was interesting that stood out is the method in which it's perceived. I don't really know what he's saying there because it's not the way it's perceived. It actually is. I mean, thousands of years ago, we were using rocks and sticks to throw and fling at people when we wanted to hurt them or protect our tribe. And now we use high powered elistics with gunpowder to do it. So that's not a perceived change. That's an actual change. Well, and maybe, I mean, we can riff on this, but like, you know, I don't agree with it, but society thinks other things are violent that aren't violent, right? That, okay, that's a good point. Like silence and violence. Or violence. Yeah, they're perceiving things as violence that it really isn't violence. That's actually probably what he, I didn't consider that. That's probably what he's talking about. Yeah, those are the things you hear. Silence is violence words are violent. This is why it's important. We don't like, I'll never say he was attacking me when somebody gets upset with me online. Because I might say verbal insulting or verbal assault. I would never say verbal attack because that's not that's not an attack. Like let's not conflate language and confuse people. It's not an attack words are not violent unless, unless I'm actively calling for violence. If I tell my listeners, hey, here's Kip's address. And I want you to go and I want you to pull them out of his house and I want you to, you know, kill him. Okay, that would be violent rhetoric. But if I say, hey, this guy Kip, we got into an argument. I don't like him. And here's why I don't like him. And here's why I think he's wrong. And here's why he thinks I'm wrong. And here's why I think it's, it's a dangerous ideology. I'm not calling for violence on anybody. Totally. So I think the words that we use are important. Go ahead. Yeah. Well, I was going to ask you, what's break down why this is so important? Because there's a couple elements of why we don't want to do this. Well, it becomes dangerous very, very quickly, right? So if I, okay, so if I believe that your point of view threatens me, does that give me less or more of a justification to eliminate you speaking that way about me violently more? It allows me to justify physical violence with you if I take your words as violent. And this has happened throughout all of human history. Every genocide can probably be traced back to this in some way. Is that a group of people were turned into the villains. And once a group of people is unjustly turned into the villain, then we have a reason. And that's, this is why people say Trump is Hitler. If he's true, okay, let's go back in time. Let's say to go back to that killing thing that you had an opportunity to kill Hitler. Would you, would you do it? And I think most people would say, yeah, absolutely. I would do it. Okay. I think you can justify why you do that. Now, fast forward today. If Trump is Hitler, does that give you more of a reason or justification to take him out? Yes, which is why we see political violence on the left and right. Mostly the left, I think, you know, you can look at the statistics and data. I think it's mostly the left. But yeah, it's, it's, it is dangerous ideology. It's not always violent, but, and you're not always culpable in what you say. But what you say certainly elevates the, the, the violence, the danger. And so I think as Americans, we ought to explore concepts and ideas respectfully, thoughtfully, intelligently, in good faith. That's something that a lot of people don't do in good faith. You know, when people ask questions, I can immediately tell whether they're being genuine or disingenuous. And if they're asking me a question and I say, that's a disingenuous question, I don't get into that. They're like, well, no, no, I really mean it. I'm like, I've been doing this long enough and I know that you don't mean it because every time I answer what I think is a disingenuous question, then they're like, see, this was what? And I'm like, okay, you didn't want to actually have the discussion. So yeah, it's, it is dangerous to increase the temperature of our rhetoric. You know, but the other side of it is, is people that they probably do perceive Trump, for example, as being dangerous. And so I don't think that's the case, but yeah, it's, it's hard. This is why this is why it was Charlie, like Charlie Kirk, you know, I think about him and why his mission to talk about things and communicate and be intelligent and debate was the basis for growth. And I think it defuses the temperature when we engage in that in good faith. Yeah, I mean, he's the prime example of this, right? Like what, once you make them violent, their words is violent, then it makes it difficult for us to have discourse and arguments and, and to work out issues. So now it's just be quiet. Don't express, don't challenge, right? And that's not going to not going to help society as a, as a whole, either. Well, ironically, when you don't talk, then people will say, well, silence is violence. Okay, I don't, I don't know what you, if I express an opinion, I'm being dangerous. If I don't express it, then I'm being silent and also participating in violence. And, you know, for example, I hear this all the time. People are like, oh, well, you were quiet about this one. I bring up a subject that I, that I'm interested in and, or frustrated about. Well, you didn't talk about this thing a year ago. Oh, I'm sorry. Was I obligated to talk about all the problems that ever existed every time I opened my mouth? Or was I obligated to address a problem that I don't perceive as a problem, but you do? You should talk about that. Like, I don't have to have contrary to popular belief and what people might think about me, an opinion about everything all the time, any given day of the week. I don't think I just don't feel irrelevant. Some things aren't a problem for me. And if they're a problem for you, great. You talk about it. But I don't need to talk about it. Yeah, totally, totally. All right. Jake Thompson, Ryan, I hear you talk a lot about brotherhood and having men in your corner. But I've spent most of my life doing things alone. And honestly, I'm used to it. How does a guy start building a brotherhood when he doesn't really have one to begin with? Yeah, I mean, being used to it is complacency. Right? Okay. So imagine being at work. And I hate this phrase, "Kip, I'm sure you do too." And I'm sure everybody who's ever heard it hates it. You come to the boss with a good idea or the supervisor, whoever. And they're like, "Well, you know, this is just the way we've always done it." It's such a dumb thing to say. It's so lazy. That's what it is. It's intellectually lazy. It's such a dumb thing to say. Don't say that. If you have a real reason for it, then explain the real reason. But this is the way we've always done it. It's not a reason for doing a thing. And that's a little bit what Jake might be falling into is, "Okay, just because you're comfortable with it doesn't make it a good reason to engage in it. I could be comfortable with a lot of things that are antithetical to my growth and development. So should I continue to engage in it? No." You know, pornography is a good one. A lot of guys are comfortable with watching pornography all the time. Does that mean that's a good thing for them? No? Quite the opposite, actually. So you have to ask yourself, "Is comfort and complacency more important to me or as growth in progress more important to me?" And if it's growth in progress, and don't just pay a lip service because I know you're going to say growth in progress, everybody would when asked that question. But what would really prove to me that that actually had some weight is if you pushed yourself outside of your comfort zone. And just by the nature of you asking the question, let's me know that you know being in a brotherhood is more important than being isolated. A Friday field notes came out today called, "Why the lone wolf dies." So if you haven't listened to it, go back to last week's Friday field notes and check it out. And I talk about the reasons it's so important. And I also talk about why modern culture and society incentivize men to be lonely. We're easier to control when we're isolated. We consume more as a way of distraction, pornography, substance abuse, video games, binge watching TV. We're definitely more likely to engage in consumerism as opposed to producing more. So there's some real reasons why the government and institutions would love for us to be isolated and alone. Together, we're significantly more powerful. So how do you do it? Go back and listen to that podcast. We're talking about three main ways. And there's only three. There's the gym. Actually, I'll say there's four, but there's the gym. There's business functions and there's church functions. And then the other that I identified is hobbies. Communities around hobbies. That's it. I can't think of something that falls outside of that. And when I say the gym, it might be Jiu-Jitsu. It might be a running club. It might be a hiking club. Physical fitness is what I'm saying. That's the gym. Maybe you really love to shoot pistols or archery or hunting or maybe you do like to paint or photography. I've got friends who are photographers and they'll do photography classes or other photographers in Zion National Park. I live at the base of Zion. So that's a community that they've built. Church functions, business outings, rotary, chamber of commerce. How do you do it? You go where the people are. And then you start having conversations asking questions. It's not a difficult thing. And it's not even a complicated thing. You know, everybody says, "Oh, it's simple, but I'm not easy." No, it's actually both. It's simple and it's easy. You find what you're interested in. You get on your phone and you're like, "I'm interested in Jiu-Jitsu." And you pull Jiu-Jitsu up in Southern Utah. And then the three academies come up and you say, "Okay, well, that one meets Tuesday at seven. Perfect. Let me call them." It's not hard. If you make it hard, it's only because you're trying to be complacent. People do that all the time. We make simple things complex so we can excuse ourselves of doing what we know we ought to be doing. Yeah, we dramatize the outcome to justify the inaction. Not even the outcome, just the amount of work it will take. And it doesn't see it. But you know what I mean? It's like, "Oh, well, I don't know those guys." And people, you know, it'll be hard. And like, we come up with all the stuff, right? And then use that to justify the inaction of the decision. That's why I'm really cautious when I hear people say, "Oh, that's hard." I'm like, "Is it, though?" Yeah. Like, let's stop and really ask ourselves, "Is it hard?" Well, yeah, it's hard because of this and that. No, no, no, no, no, hold on. Let's actually ask ourselves, like, are we just saying that? Or is it actually hard? I think a lot of the things that we say are hard or not hard. We just think they are. We believe they are. Or we tell ourselves they are. Yeah. The other glaring option is really just join the Iron Council, like my name guys that are focused on that are aligned with your values. Right? So that's your other option, Jake, is, you know, if you don't want to take those three, then join the fourth and just join us in the Iron Council and get on a battle team and start getting after it with guys that are on the same path as you, wanting to improve them, become better versions of themselves. Which, to be honest with you, I think is superior anyway because sometimes, you know, I train with some guys, I respect them on the mats, but I'm not getting marriage advice from those guys. Right? Because they're probably not in the best space to be giving that advice. And then there's guys at church that are lazy and don't go to, you know, don't take care of their bodies and they're not getting after it on the physical side. And so, you know, it's going to probably take multiple angles, right? For you to get around the tribe that is or the brotherhood that's going to lift you up. Yeah. When you talked about church, this has always been fascinating to me. And in the past, I may not have said this because it seems like it's judgmental and it's too harsh. I'm like, no, we should talk about this. If you are a church goer, if you're spiritual and religious, you have no excuse to be fat. You just don't. Like, if you really believed that God gave you this incredible body and this incredible, I'm not saying you have to be the epitome of health. Yeah, but if you're 50 or 100 pounds overweight and you're standing in front of a pulpit in front of your congregation and you're telling them about being appreciative of what God offers and honoring our bodies and being disciplined and being committed to something that helps us be better in the community and you're 100 pounds overweight. You that's that's hypocritical and I'm not I don't want to beat you up, but I do want to say get it together. Yeah. I mean, I've seen so many bishops and pastors and priests where it's like, I can't trust you, man. But you can't lose weight and I know people will hear that and be like, well, Ryan, you mess, of course I do. And I would want to be held accountable too. That's why I have the brotherhood of the Iron Council. So guys like you, Kip can hold me accountable and say, Hey, dude, what's going on? You're messing up. So yeah, if you are that way and you're like, you know what Ryan, that's right. Actually, then then band with us. I'll walk that journey with you. I'll give you the tools you need to get your fitness and check and imagine the amount of power. Like if you really believe that your voice is an instrument for God. And I believe it is if you really believe that then don't you think that losing weight and getting in shape will not only amplify your voice, but give you more influence and lives of the people that you want to serve. You have an obligation to do that. Absolutely. And I just need to say that. And the correlation between that and parenthood is the same. Same. Right. Oh, you care about your kids well being awesome. Guess what the number one thing you should be doing. They can care of your health. If you if you really care, if you really care. But yet it's like, I care about their health, but not mine. No, no, that's not how it works. Right. Your health and how you lived will dictate the nutrition and health of your children more than any other factor. Yeah, you want some weight. There it is. All right. One more question. Cause I got a prep for our afternoon call and council. Yeah. After this. So what do we get Marcus Bennett? You, sorry, my scrolling's off here. You often say men need to take extreme ownership of their lives. But what does that actually look like when you feel stuck in a job you hate and you've got a family depending on your income. This. Okay. So I like this question. Taking ownership actually might mean sacrificing. There's a cause. Sometimes you do. Yeah. Right. Yeah. You could be in a job you hate and and but that's ownership. You're like, but I have a mortgage to pay. So this is my this is my hand right now. So I actually don't think the two red odds like being in a job you hate, but you have to pay for your family's well being and their considerations and food and that's ownership. That's extreme ownership. That's ultimate ownership. Now that said, there's a lot of things that you can do with your current organization. There's a lot of things that you can do personally that will help line you up for something better. You can take night classes if a degree is something that you need. Maybe it's a credential or a certification when I was doing financial planning. I was busy all day, right? I was busy meeting with clients and making calls and doing plans for people. In my off hours, I was studying for new licenses, new new credentials, new letters behind my name so that I could be a better financial advisor and be better at the work that I was doing. Another thing that I was doing is I was learning about business structures and taxes and hiring people because I knew eventually I was going to start my own financial planning practice. So while I was there doing that work, which was not ideal at the time, I was doing stuff over here positioning myself for success. The other one I often talk about is you better be a good networker. I can't tell you how many times we talk with guys who were like, I got laid off, I didn't even see it coming and I don't have anything lined up. That's a you problem. Why weren't you networking? Why weren't you meeting industry people? Why weren't you serving other people, making connections, being a mover in a shake or going to church? Going to chamber, going to rotary. Why weren't you doing those things? Because I'll tell you what, if this one away order of man went away today, fine. I'll use all my connections to either build something else or to get hired some, I'll go work in McDonald's if I have to to make ends meet. It's not ultimately what I want to do, but I'll do it because that's what is required. But you better believe I'm always going to be improving my station. Rudy Reyes came on the podcast last week and he's a marine recon and an incredible, incredible human being. And he talked about one of the principles of battle, infantry, being improve your position always. This is actually probably a jiu-jitsu concept too, right? We hear about position over submission, like improve your position. If you're here, get to hear. Always do the little things to improve your position and you'll never find yourself. I shouldn't say never. Very rarely will you find yourself in a position, a compromising position, I'll say. Yeah, I love that. There's layers to ownership too, Ryan. You might find yourself saying part of ownership is my current condition is not what I want. I'm going to do these extra things and take back control of my livelihood and what I'm doing for work. But inside of that, you might be saying, well, am I owning my job or am I sitting back in my job and waiting to be told what to do, right? And I love this analogy is you're the CEO that it's really interesting. We do this in our jobs. We go, you know, we take full ownership to accept the position. Right. So if Ryan has an open rack and I apply and we have alignment, this is a partnership. And then the minute I accept the job, I all said and become the passenger. And I give over ownership to Ryan to manage me. And it's like, dude, never do that. You're the CEO. And so if, for instance, I'm working for you, Ryan, I should be asking myself all the time. Ryan's not my boss. He is my client. What is winning in my role? How do I ensure Ryan and his company generates a profit or efficiency off how I'm showing up? And if I'm not getting what I need from Ryan to do that, guess what I do? I demand it from him. Ryan, you want me to win? You want this from me? This is what I need from you for me to make that possible. I need that clarity. I want those things. And it's interesting because sometimes we'll talk about like, oh, we need great leaders. I at least I say it all the time. We need great leaders. But if you don't have a great leader, if you're not getting the clarity, what are you doing about it? And you demand it. And you take back ownership of the position that you're working in and you get what you need to be successful. And that translates everything. Oh, I don't like my church group. Awesome. What are you doing about it? Have you brought up what you don't like? Are you showing up in a way? Oh, I don't like the way my marriage is going right now. We seem like roommates. Got it. Or are you waiting and hoping for someone else to change? That shows up in all areas of life. And so there's layers of this that we need to consider. When you were talking about that, Kip, I wrote a couple things down here. I can't tell you how often in previous jobs, employment positions that I've got promotions because of exactly what you're talking about. How often do you hear a guy say, they don't pay me enough to do that. Or here's another one. That's not my job description. You know how many times I've got promoted. You know how many raises I've got? You know how many business opportunities I've created and partnerships I've developed. Because I did things they didn't pay me to do. Yeah. Because I did things that weren't exactly in my job description. And then people not always not in the acute necessarily. But generally people begin to notice that and you become a valuable player. So when you're asked to do something, if it's an alignment with who you are and what you want to do, then do it. Look for things that you're not getting paid for to do. And the other one that I often hear is like, oh, you know, my company won't pay for my education. Okay. They won't pay for that certain credential or degree. Can you do it still? Yeah. Well, then go do it. Well, they won't pay for it. Then you pay for it. But why wouldn't you? There's a couple of people in my life that come to mind that are in the legal field paralegals in particular. And yeah, they weren't getting paid to go get their schooling and their paralegal certificate. And they did it anyways on their own dime. That's the behavior that we need to show up as men is like, yeah, okay. So the person didn't give you the thing you want to just go get it. If it's important, you do it. Yeah, take ownership. Absolutely. Absolutely. So a couple call the action, right? I mean, divorce not death.com, right? If you're in that same place as David. And that's actually part of being a member of the Iron Council. And so if you're on the fence of joining the Iron Council and banding with us anyway, just join us on the Iron Council. Then you can get part of that course, but divorce the divorce not death.com as well as order man.com slash iron council to learn more about the brotherhood. There it is, guys. You've got your marching orders. We're also doing a preview call on March 18th. You can check out at 8 p.m. Eastern. If you go to the iron council.com slash preview. You can get registered and get a Google calendar invite as well. So that's the iron council.com slash preview. All right, guys. Good questions. They appreciate you. Hopefully we gave you some good answers. And hopefully we didn't lead. Who was it? David astray six months ago. It's actually 2023. So that was like three years ago. Whoa, I thought I said three months ago was three years ago. It's like three years ago. Yeah. Sounds like based on what I think I would have said. It sounds like you made a valiant effort. And I hope my hope is that you can look yourself in the mirror and say, "No, I tried it for the kids. I tried to do everything I could. And I can't." And that's the nature of it sometimes. Anyways, guys, we'll be back next week. No, we'll be back on Friday for your Friday field notes until then go out there, take action and come and invite you. Thank you for listening to the Order of Man podcast. You're ready to take charge of your life and be more of a man you were meant to be. We invite you to join the order at orderofman.com.