Thank You The Privilege

- For decades, a shadowy organization called The Lemonati has kept lemon on top and lime in the shadows. Look around, lemon-forward sodas, even lemon-forward songs. We ran the tracks, slowed them down, reversed them, and squeezed out the truth. ♪ All hail the lemon ♪ - That's lemon propaganda right there. But now, 7UP is fighting back with their new lime-lemon soda. Join the 7 uprising. Flip the sip. - Ugh, I hate Mondays. - King's Hawaiian Cinnamon Swirl Bite? - Taylor Hansen? Sure, I'll try one. Mmm. ♪ Bites, ba-du-ba-da-ba ♪ - Hey, let's get back to work, please. - But Taylor Hansen's making my day way better with these new soft and swirly King's Hawaiian Cinnamon Bites. - Taylor Hansen? Nice. - Try one. - Mmm. ♪ Bites, ba-du-ba-da-ba-doo ♪ - King's Hawaiian Cinnamon Bites. ♪ Don't you love 'em ♪ - There's nothing like it. ♪ Sweet, swirly ♪ ♪ He's so good ♪ - So, Rob, my cat, he was supposed to be in the video today. He was supposed to be in the studio. - I heard. - Couldn't make it. Tried to get him in the car. We had to turn right back around. - He was making noise? - Yeah, he was screaming bloody murder. - He's a diva. - I appreciate the feedback. - Yeah. - But-- - Was it real screams? - Yeah. - You know how cats can go-- - It's not any sort of meow or, it's a scream, it's a guttural scream. - He doesn't like the car? - Hates the, I mean, I think he thinks he's going to the vet. He's never been in a car for a good reason, you know? - Yeah. - He's either going to the hospital for multiple blood transfusions or going to the vet. - Or escaping a fire. - No, he wasn't around for that. - Oh. - That was just John. - So he has no idea. - But if everyone had the current pets. Sorry, I'm going to have a little bit of a hard time like getting the words out today, I think. - I know. - But know that they're inside of me. - Let them out. - If everybody who evacuated for the fires with me had the current pets that they have, we would have had about like 16 cats and two dogs in one house and that would have been scary. But all this is-- - To be said. - I'm trying to basically, what I'm trying to say, is that I ended things with my situation, Chip. - What? - Yup. Ended things. It was on and off for a long time, but I'm ready to settle down and really commit to that one partner who is the whole package. - I'm glad 'cause you've been really all over the place recently. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - It's nice to see you settling down. - I'm finally committing. This partner really gives me everything that I need and want in a relationship. - Good, Brooke. - So, I'm talking a little bit more. - Oh. - And then double it. - And kind of up and through. - Yeah, yeah. - That's great. - So, I'm talking about PetSmart. - She's talking about PetSmart, y'all. It's nice that you found your partner here, but there's no way they have flexible auto ship and same day delivery. - I'm talking flexible auto ship. I'm talking same day delivery. I'm talking I can go into the store. What more could you want from a partner? I'm talking about the whole package. - You're not talking about this. - I'm not. - And you're not talking about this. - I'm not talking about this. - I'm talking about this. Okay, got it. - All right. - You made it very clear. So, break up with the other guy. PetSmart's waiting. It's time. Visit PetSmart.com and set up auto ship today. Your pet deserves a full package and so do you. - I want to flag again that I'm doing a really fun thing this week that requires a lot of talking. And so right now during the podcast and maybe for the future, I might be broken. I just want to let everyone know the words are struggling to come out in the way that I would love them to. And I feel a little bit embarrassed and I just want to disclaim. - Got there eventually. - And that's it. And that's it. It might be, I might be a little bit different than you're used to today and maybe I won't be, but I already have been. So, it's been pretty difficult. - We'll get you there. Don't you worry about it. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Hi and welcome back to Brooke and Connor Make a Podcast. - Oh, sorry. Hi. - No, it's important. - It's important to disclaim at the top. - Yeah, I love disclaimers. - Just to set expectations. - I love that. I love setting expectations and disclaiming. - So. - So, hi? - Yeah, you could say that, period. On the ship. - Do you have anything you want to-- - Your haircut? - Say to me? No, but thank you, you didn't say anything. What do you think about it? - I like it. - Thanks, but no. - Your slippers? - No. - Your wicker slippers? - No, not my wickers. - Your holes in your knees of your pants? - No, God, thank you so much. You're nailing it across the board and I appreciate all those things that you're noticing. - Is it physical? - It's my half. - Your half? - Yeah, it's my half. - Happy frickin' half. Oh, I'm mortified that I didn't have that written in my Hobonichi. - This is something that you can put in for next year. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Just so everyone knows, March 11th, that's gonna be my half. - Oh, what did you do for my half? - Oh my God, well, you do like your space, so I did give you your space on your half. - Appreciate you. - Yeah. - Yeah. My full is coming up, which-- - I know it is, I saw it in your hobo. - I have a, I'm so aware of my own mortality. - Yeah, we don't need to, me too. - In a very scary way and I think it's the impending, you know, everything is impending and shit like that, but you know what doesn't help? There's a new app. Have you seen Death Clock? - Death Clock hasn't come across my desk. What could it be? - It's some, I've been getting ads for it because my phone is also in my brain. Some sort of like AI death estimator based off of things about you. - Like your lifestyle? - Based on lifestyle and other family history, I would assume, and other shit. It makes an educated guess about when the day you will die. - Super awesome. - And how, yeah. Oh, I love that. - Wait, that's cool. - Oh, why do I agree? - That's really cool. - Yeah. - Okay, getting now, running-- - Okay, okay, downloading now on Autoship. - Run, don't walk, and download Death Clock. - Yeah, yeah, it's just like a feel good type of thing. - The thing is, why not? One, let your hair down and find out when you'll perish. Two, that, it also doesn't calculate if you were to get hit by a car. - I was gonna say, if I could tell you, if you had to choose between me telling you how you're gonna die or when you're gonna die, which would you rather know? - How or when? Hmm, it's hard because if you were to tell me you're gonna drown, what am I not supposed to go swimming? One of my few very, very, very simple pleasures in this life, swimming, vanilla ice cream. - I will say, all of the books I've read where the plot line is like somebody knowing when and how they're gonna die and avoiding the very thing that is gonna kill them, in avoiding it, that's how they meet what kills them. - And you know what? - So you're gonna die regardless. - You still-- - Like you stay home and a tree crashes through the window. - Yeah, that's Final Destination. - Yeah. - Yeah. - That's your life. - You have to. You literally have to. - Yeah, I don't know that an app could be like, hey, this is how it's gonna happen. It could say, I guess it could say when, but that's the same as anything else. What if it was like 140 years from now? I'd be like, hang on. - I wonder if our lifespan, if the human lifespan will increase by the time we get there. By there, I mean like 100. - It'd be a damn shame if like, these are awesome bodies now. These tight little things. And then like, when we get real saggy, they're gonna be like, oh, by the way, we can extend your life and be like, and I have my balls are touching my knees. Like for what? I got to throw them over my shoulders to go to the store. - Yeah. - I don't know if I want to extend this. - Right. I get that. - Yeah. - I feel like 100 years is pretty solid. - It's fine, given what-- - 90 is solid. - Given what we know. - Yeah. - Yeah. - Sure. - Sure. - Anyway. - Yeah, we can, I mean, we can wrap that up. I do want to say a couple of things really, really quick on that. No, I don't at all, actually. I have so much random lore for today. - Oh, I do too. I mean, the first note in my Hobonichi is jade walnuts. - Walk me through jade. Jade does. - I'm on jade walnut talk. Basically, if you take two walnuts and just rub them together, kind of like this in your hand. And like, I mean, I think it, my understanding is that it could take years, but you just keep rubbing and rubbing, and then eventually they turn into jade walnuts. - Perfect. - Which are like-- - I was hoping they would. - You actually wouldn't believe the transformation of regular walnut to jade walnut. It's like very matte, a regular walnut, you know? - Yeah. - There's no shine to it. These are like jewels, the jade walnuts. They're glistening. - Can I see a jade walnut, please? - Yeah. - The more, you just keep rubbing them together. really awesome for years i mean i'm sitting in my bed at night just watching people rub walnuts together bro you should make this happen for yourself okay so polishing my fancy walnuts into those are already she's been polishing those you can tell she's been at it yeah she's been at it they're already starting to have that particular type of shine to them well this is something that i can wrap my head around only because i i was really into fidget spinners and those little dot things that you push through yeah and out yeah so like this could be something maybe that could land on my desk no i'm really excited i've been actively like looking for walnuts are there walnuts in la i think that you could probably go to the grove and go to that little farmer's market area i want to find one like in a natural way like i want to like meet someone in the wild you know meet meet a walnut yeah it's like i don't like buying a walnut from the farmer's market is the equivalent of like date using a dating app you know i want to meet a walnut now naturally in the wild i don't know what trees produce walnuts and are they native to our home i was wondering you know uh it's not an oak tree that's a oak is acorn oak is acorn pine is pine cone could it be elm i don't think elms are like something we come across day to day oh the juggling yes from the family juggling that she ah ah yes juggling that she they oh it's the walnut tree yeah yeah uh we don't have walnut trees we do this you have to break those things apart no no no they land oh yeah they are it's a fruit what huh hang on um okay so this feels like too much for today i don't think that we need to be just with everything going on it feels like so much happening in the world and walnuts are a fruit feels like too much leave us alone california central valley where is that like is that like in the valley no it's where is california central valley i think that maybe we could start there um yeah it's right in the middle and it is pretty much i would call that the central valley the san joaquin valley good to know are we in it no god no sacramento we could find that at our sacramento show oh hey which is coming up yeah i don't know i don't know i don't know i don't know hey if y'all are coming to the sacramento hey all you people oh yeah if anyone is coming to the sacramento show and find a walnut in the wild if you end up having four walnuts burning a hole in your pocket we are on the market in the market as well in and around the market yeah for two walnuts yeah yes we're stepping into our jade era yes via walnut and we will take them off your hands thanks what a fun thing yeah that's who is it hurting for us to make some jade walnuts can i be honest yeah here's something what does nato stand for i'm bringing it back across your desk no no i am because i know now do not do this brooke what does nato stand for that's really brooke hit me like that bass tell me what nato stands for national no come on north american no you want one of those america american north yes north alliance no north association north you're colder ah no north did i say alliance north ass north do i know the word you do know the word and it's very easy is it more like on the in the vein of america or alliance so say association it's like not neither it's neither i really want you to get there i know words are maybe this is a good exercise to find the words today north i know people are screaming at their thing today they're like let me skip a okay treaty yep organization yep north blank treaty organization okay north associates no north think about the word i would use in every day you we have used it we've used it quite a bit we've had a conversation about it north it's really just like not it's not it's not man-made you know like this it's not like a artificial no okay no now we're getting cold sorry you were right in that sense but come on north come on now application no north i want you to go again away from man north out altadena north altitude north okay that's you're getting that's closer north is no al north allegiance no north oh no north owl you're getting cold you're getting warmer ally ally no no no no that's a man-made situation oh i'm getting confused when you're bringing north act at at north attention no north at come on think about what it is it i yeah it's a like a union organization organization it's a union we've already covered that we know that so we don't need to do alliance organization uh you said at at at at north at there's no way north not attack north attachment north academy nope north north at i'm gonna try to north north north at you like that yeah i like that a lot i like north at uh north at uh north at i mean i i this is like torture oh you're so north it's really it's really you're gonna get blue balls when you i have them north i i almost think i might not give me a little bit more atlantic yeah north no it's atlanta no it's not it's north atlanta treaty organization atlanta yeah no it's not connor atlantic north atlantic treaty organization i honestly connor that i like obviously i should have gotten that but atlantic like really wouldn't know and that's what gives people a lot of trouble and i don't want to hear it okay because it it's hard and you said keep keep you you spit spit it out for me now you with the man-made that was confusing atlantic well i mean it's not a it's i'm not doing an alliance it's not between two two folks it's it's it's uh it's an ocean right all right what about it i just wanted to see if you knew you remembered it because it was such a huge heavy topic for us that one time well what matters is that i know what it is how many countries are in it don't that's not like i would not no one is expected to know that off the top of their head i know 40s i would say yeah 42 32 32 yeah yeah but it's confusing the ones that are like albany is in it and it's like okay i get that yeah yeah france is in it yeah you wonder how the atlantic is involved at all you know they're all touching um there are some things that we just like can't get into today and get off me get off me walnuts being a fruit walnuts we're way more in a wheelhouse than albania and the nitty gritty of the atlantic listen it's big yes yes the lemonati has spent decades keeping lemon on top and lime in the shadows their lemon agenda has infiltrated everything even our music that hit song named after the color of lemons not a coincidence big lemon has been pulling strings in the industry for years think about it but now seven up is fighting back with their new lime lemon soda now lime comes first seven up flip the sip i hate mondays king's hawaiian cinnamon swirl bite taylor hansen sure i'll try one hey let's get back to work please but taylor hansen's making my day way better with these new soft and swirly king's hawaiian cinnamon bites taylor hansen nice try one king's hawaiian cinnamon bites there's nothing like it daylight savings we are still doing that bullshit and we're gonna stop soon do you know what's like thank you the clock i want to get that once this episode try it i have been it's funny because i was thinking about it and then i saw someone say it and i was almost there with my thought but someone finished it for me and i was like thank you but someone was like they're letting us have they're letting us it's so nice that they're letting us see the sun for an extra hour now and it's like they they are their whole they are the ones that change it it's kind of like how brands pay youtube to have ads and then we pay youtube to take the ads away yeah yeah hey wait what is it thank you blank yeah like it has to come naturally i know so sorry i'm getting but it's thank you i already i forgot thank you thank you blank yeah well thank you thank you that's that's what i was yeah but it's also like something like an over overarching like thank you the clock yes okay thank you that okay thank you the sun well you have to like when you know you know i know i know dude it will come dude finally like i'm hand i'm giving you one of these things i know i know i know one of these like yeah a little tongue twister thanks yeah i like i do love this daylight savings though like i love getting that extra hour of sun and when it gets darker later but i'm so jet lagged but in the reverse way well you lost an hour i can't go to sleep yeah why am i staying up till like one whereas i used to go to bed at nine how does the four what nine to ten because you're watching people play with like what's the four hour what is that that don't that doesn't make sense to it ain't right no okay yeah but i think that i'm obviously so tired walnut tuck is walnut talk is you gotta stop talking thank you the walnut almost no you could be like thank you the creator like for like creating providing the walnut god oh i thought you meant god wait what did you mean oh like the content creator when you think about it god is the first content creator god is just a fancy word for content creator oh yeah talking about creation talking about big bang thank you the creation getting colder you're getting it less oh it's really hard okay i'll get there yeah you will okay speaking of content yeah i had a show on sunday oh yeah in brooklyn thank you if you came um and i have been taking a page out of your book another common brook w today um sorry i'm crying a little bit no worries and thank you the tear ducts okay it's just like sure you know i think it's best if i just stop trying well it's yeah yeah i'm like almost like not gauging like daylight savings and then the clock technically sure but it was like i feel like if i don't walk you through it you'll get there it's real okay sorry i'm not gonna do it it was like too directly yeah you need like one degree removed and it's like i totally get that that's where i'm that's the issue for me yeah it's a sticking point okay sorry brooklyn show yeah so i um you know like when i write jokes i put them in my notes yeah my app because i'll get those things and then when i write the actual joke when i flesh it out i put it in a journal and i told you that like all of my journals i have stacks and stacks of these um that's like where i flesh out the jokes and i go through and it's kind of like an audit of the jokes but some of them are when i've like started journaling and i'm writing down like day to day right and i wrote a bunch of new material yeah this show i wrote like 25 minutes of new material oh wow yeah it was great and then pages did something like that take up like six wow yeah and i i don't i'm usually off book for these shows uh-huh but this one i was like i'm gonna give myself some grace these are brand new jokes a lot of material i'm gonna bring the journal out a lot of comics i've seen have their yeah pages the the concept of the show also that we're doing is a work it out so it's like new stuff and we flesh it out we talk to people and like the jokes change um because we haven't done that before so i go out and i go on the stage and i pop open my notebook guess which guess which journal i brought the wrong one the one that has like my journal entries like your diary yeah yeah mm-hmm that's almost like worst nightmare vibes like imagine just sitting like reading from it in front of a crowd when i tell you i'm sitting there i get to a point where i'm like all right i'm gonna do some new jokes and i whatever i open it and it says today was another hard one i actually genuinely have a solution to all your problems what is it louise carmen who is it no no i don't even know i was gonna thank louise but it's this really bougie journal place in paris that all of the journal i was just there ah but i like i would have to go and with it it's like a leather organizer and within it is multiple books yeah it's a like one of those just like experiences well within it like it's a it's an entire ecosystem in one so like you have multiple notebooks in one and you can keep your passport in there too and stuff people are going to be like oh my god i'm gonna really obsessed and i need a i need it pretty significant oh that's pretty is it just a leather wrap it's pretty much a leather wrap but like and it just goes around highly coveted oh i mean it's very julia mervis just got one she was in paris i was gonna say it's very chic it's yeah yeah yeah i i really need one um like that would be my ideal brand trip a leather wrap is to go instead of like tart and like saint bart's it's louise carmen and some twine um that's cool thanks well i didn't do that i think my issue is that i need them to be color-coded i can't have a bunch of black moleskins stacked up in my apartment you can totally color code them within the louise oh you don't have to put louise notebooks inside of the louise carmen i i need to show you anyways people people were very nice someone i've never gotten more names that are like i can't tell if you were doing a bit there's so many awkward moments but you saved them all and i was like you know how you go out to things like this and you're like at least no one will know if you you're the only one that will know if you're if you're messing up right people caught on yeah but like that's what those types of shows are for yes and i actually think like you haven't really done these no like you almost missed a step like you went right to like grand tour yeah so like i think this is really cool i was doing those shows that i was hosting and there were nights remember i would come in here i'm like i bombed right and like i think it's you missed that like key workshop era yeah i'm getting very comfortable you were thrown right to the sharks i'm getting very comfortable going out and being like well what sucks is i go out and do shows like i talked about the there was a day yesterday in new york where or not yesterday sunday in new york where i was walking around in soho and i'm not kidding i saw 50 dudes that have now found their new personality in love story jfk jr you know i had stopped watching did you the same way i have never i'm too you know i'm too in pain and knowing they're about gonna die like i can't i can't continue to me the show ends when they meet or when they start dating i'm thinking about maybe going to the wedding but like i think that will just hurt more yeah i mean yeah if that's gonna hurt you like that yeah i i want to say that yesterday i watched titanic on the plane flying here and i was getting a lot of flack people are like this is not a plane movie i'm like when you've seen it as many times okay i got a spiel when you've seen it as many times as i have i would call myself titanic the movie aficionado like i definitely am very well versed in this movie i know obviously i know what's gonna happen historically i know it's a story i have this was a cathartic experience for me even my 80th time watching this movie on this plane that is crazy like i can't put my i can't my i go into fight or flight when titanic is on i had a sweater on a that didn't have a hood which i need to not stop flying with out like a hood apparatus i need to always have a hood apparatus so i had to put my hoodie take my hoodie up put it over my face because i was sobbing again and i kept coughing and the woman next to me was this older diane keaton looking woman rest in peace and every time i coughed she'd go and i'm like okay easy i'm not like hot i wasn't like i was like and she'd go and by the way we're in like pretty severe turbulence i'm coughing and that's when she jumps you were coughing from the turbulence no i was coughing because i was crying oh i have one thing that i got fired up yesterday about it's when people come on and they're like my hot take is that rose and jack could have fit on that floating door i'm sorry no they couldn't have are you even watching the movie have you ever floated on anything you should open your shows with that what do you know about buoyancy seriously have you ever tried to get on a kayak alone the kayak doesn't want you in it you know it'll flip it's hard to get back in a kayak sorry could you imagine getting on a floating door that door doesn't want to be in the water it's not supposed to float i think the issue for me is that like let's both get on it and like if we drown we drown together loved her so much that he and he's from wisconsin so he's like oh i'm i think he was thinking i can handle this i can handle this but also he was willing to dive her he was a romantic yes of course the surface area on the thing it can they could fit on it but it's not buoyant enough for two people it frustrates me so much i i i think you should have gotten on it i i if i were her after everything they've been through i don't really need to go on living if he's not on the door on the door with me what i don't think what i appreciate about her is that like he didn't exist to anybody he was an orphan yes he was nomad he didn't there was no record of him anywhere she didn't even have a photograph she took his last name and now is bearing children yeah and carried on the Dawson legacy yeah now one thing I did notice is that plenty of people are dying way earlier than him there's several other floating objects you know like I'm seeing myself craft a bit of a floating apparatus like while we're on the boat so look at all these supplies so you genuinely fully believe like without a doubt you would have survived the Titanic no I think that if I was in fight-or-flight mode I would die just because I like I would die and he just passed away closed his eyes and just died and you know like everyone else's eyes they're like he's like a baby like an like a like I've never I've never seen it I've never seen the death oh he falls I mean he just like falls asleep on the door no I mean he's shivering with her and then she wakes up and trying to wake him up it's and I'm not I don't know what's what's worse than him dying is a speech that he gives her where it's like you need to go out and live and you need to have a bunch of babies and you need to grow old with them and you need to watch them grow and and and then I feel sick the one thing I noticed in this one and I'll stop talking about this but you know I you know I heart symbolism I know this is the this is the first time I've watched and I'm like he shows her his drawings and he talks and she's you know there's a lot of naked women in it she's like certainly you had a love affair with these women and he's like no not at all I love this one this one-legged prostitutes hands I love a fair maybe with her hands and there's several drawings hands hands hands and then there was a big draw like there was a big a lot of close-ups when they're like hooking up for the first time their hands hands touching hands grasping and then at the end the last thing is never let go and it's their hands and so I think that there is some sort of symbolism with the hands I couldn't figure I think that it might just be like look at you look at you tragic look at you but I don't want to hear no one ever come to me with they both could have fit get out of my seriously get out of my face you're right they both could have fit it's an issue of buoyancy yeah if yeah if it was sitting on sand we could both fit in that chair right would it float no right right right right right right was it crispy anyways that was a crispy right about JFK the thing that I was saying that's so fascinating is I'm seeing all these young men who have no sense of self and they finally found themselves and these are the most standard JP looking young men that you've ever seen they work in finance there's they they do like uniformity just like any you know they've you join a fraternity and like now these are my brothers and then you join there's a ladder that you it's finance you do this you do this private equity now they're like oh my god they're seeing someone who's essentially like a royalty on tv and they go that's me yeah I'm him hat backwards yeah button-up shirt maybe a vest yeah and then they're venmo requesting someone six dollars for the uber last night how do you feel about people taking pictures with their apartment I've been seeing a lot of discourse about that I don't know it's probably a historical apartment right I don't know I I there's an apartment in west village that every time I walk by it people are outside taking pictures and I saw the man come out one day he's like people live here by the way right it's not like a picture place I do this all the time I'm like oh my god I think that if it's that big of an issue like maybe the city makes it a historical landmark and it's like an well this is hard to say but it's like a maybe like a little bit of a museum if it's that important to like the American people I don't think it's just like where two people lived like it's like very much not like it's like a Kennedy I was gonna say in Frank House yeah it's very much not that I know no I agree people are weird I don't know but you want to hear a funny yeah I do so there's one time when I I don't think I lived in New York yet or I just moved there and I had had a can and I had an empty stomach can so I was a little bit high and I was walking over to a buddy's place and I hadn't understood yet the buzz I'm buzzing you up I'm buzzing you up and I said no you're not I'm out here I'm on the street I had walked to on the map friend's apartment oh it took me a second just the friends the apartment from friends I was like in my head I'm like oh cool it's like navigating me to my buddy's house friend's apartment you know they filmed in LA they just use the outside of it yeah that's crazy well now it's crazy to film a show like that in LA I agree they pulled it off though they did they sure did the Lemonati has spent decades keeping lemon on top and lime in the shadows their lemon agenda has infiltrated everything even our music that hit song named after the color of lemons not a coincidence big lemon has been pulling strings in the industry for years think about it but now 7up is fighting back with their new lime lemon soda now lime comes first 7up flip the sip I hate Mondays King's Hawaiian cinnamon swirl by Taylor Hansen sure I'll try one mmm hey let's get back to work please but Taylor Hansen's making my day way better with these new soft and swirly King's Hawaiian cinnamon bites Taylor Hansen nice try one King's Hawaiian cinnamon bites there's nothing like it anyways that's my probably 10 cents okay all all worth noting thank you for sharing I have a few things that I could talk about hit me have you listened to Harry's album at all yeah okay last week we posted the clip of me saying I'd really like to boogie and everyone's like yeah I have an album for me as if I didn't listen to it I really enjoy it I said when that first song came out what is it called aperture no okay it was there was only one song that came out oh well then it was that one and that's the one I'm understanding from everybody is a flop I actually I've that's really I think one of my least favorites is aperture hang on am I saying aperture right aperture yeah see like if you don't like this I like Rufus DeSalle and that's what the vibe it's giving to me I'm about Rufus DeSalle I'm talking about DeSalle comma Rufus and I really like those young men and I am I'm that's it's the same vibe and if you know that one's not my favorite I love it I do I I'll be honest my first time listening to it I was like oh my god this is the one I'm listening to and this happens to me with a lot of Harry like Harry is someone that I need to listen over and over again I was like oh I almost might not like any of these second listen I found like one or two that I liked I really like American girls yeah and then like third fourth fifth listen like I think I really love them all except aperture except aperture well I really like it that's so nice that he's he's making music for you beautiful but that's more slow I don't know if you could necessarily boogie to it okay I can boogie to just about anything pop is really good that you can boogie I don't know the names but I oh that one uh no I haven't I don't know that one you'll boogie to are you listening yet you could boogie to you know that one I don't know the word I don't know the names of the songs I listened to it on a playlist while I ran the waiting game is also gorgeous so I mean they're all great paint season two weight loss I actually like I couldn't tell you that season two weight loss weight loss I couldn't tell you how that one goes right now sorry that's the waiting game he subscribed to the Lana Del Rey school of naming music season two waiting room weight loss season two weight loss and waiting game I will say whatever he performed whatever song that was and he did a dance aperture really pissed me off aperture why it was because it gave me like the ick yeah yeah I get that I wanted to tell him it's okay to not do all that I do I I everyone gives him shit for like him not dancing and his stage presence and now I think it's like okay we appreciate you trying oh so other people agree with me I think so okay that was that was like seeing that was like seeing like your teacher at the pep rally and it's like we raise enough money and now like coach martin is gonna twerk for us and it was like okay hang on stop stop coach martin yeah it's it's not I I prefer him singing I really do let's let's just say that oh yikes yeah it looks animatronic I love the guy I really do love the guy though oh in the mouth that that's the part that I saw Harry Styles doesn't need to do that yeah yeah that's gotta stop I will say his hairline looks great he tried he didn't need to that's what I'm saying but exactly and that's why it's even more meaningful that he did I wish he would have gone into a very close maybe close friends and said should I do this I've gotten some feedback because I guarantee you it would have been unanimous but I do wonder if now we're talking I don't know if we would have talked about him in depth like this I want to get to his hairline because I think his hairline looks great I'm happy that Harry is Harry yeah do you he made a joke about it on royal court did he yeah what do you say uh something about turkey or not at all or something about his hairline yeah he just referenced he just referenced it like in passing and was like I'm kidding like he was making fun of he was making fun of the rumor that people oh it wasn't a rumor his hairline was receding and he fixed it for a fact I don't I don't know if I believe it. I just don't know. I could do that Mongolian throat singing. Oh, let me see that like fourth picture I see. Right. Yeah. Yeah. Well, your hair could also just land differently. I don't know if his hair is just falling in front of his face more there. Anyways, we don't need to speculate about his hairline. I do think he did it. It doesn't matter either way. He could be bald. I had like something I wanted to go into today. That's like a little bit more like serious and vulnerable and kind of like therapy, but I don't think today is the day. Okay. That's fine. Because my mind is my brain. Is it not a hundred hundred and I would want it to be for this. Okay. Maybe I want to talk about art. Okay. And it. Producing it and reception to it. Okay. But I don't think I can today. So maybe next week. Table it. I'll table it. I'll move it into the next page of my hope in each. Nice. Like there's no point in me even saying what I, my stuff is the dumbest stuff ever. I, I watched, I'm very excited to remember. I was really excited about that dinosaurs show on. Oh yeah. What is that? I saw it. It's basically planet earth, but it goes through like. from the beginning like you know how we always see those pictures of like that lizard then crawling out of the ocean and now it has legs it was cool like i watched the whole thing in one evening while i was cleaning and it was awesome it was awesome awesome awesome i think i'd like it if you got really high yeah maybe um i really really liked it it's just making me look at birds differently because basically everything was a bird or a lizard yeah you know we always say everything's a cat or a dog like birds or cats and what's the dinosaur's most recent common ancestor is it a lizard or a bird or boat depending on the dinosaur it's a bird yeah definitely for the pterodactyl but like it's it's crazy that i'm watching this show about these velociraptors that are just nightmarish that used to run around town like thugs and they used to rip other animals apart and then i'm watching these seagulls on the beach this morning um. fight over a bag of hot cheetos i mean how far you've come and you've evolved backwards to eat hot cheetos you guys stick your chest out remember where you came from you are not like this remember your roots i don't know much about dinosaurs sure which may shock a lot of people okay but is there and i don't mean to feed into conspiracy theories but is there like a wide-held belief that dinosaurs never existed by anyone um is there a group of people that are dinosaur deniers there are dinosaur deniers and i i think in the same vein that there's everything deniers i think there's a lot of people that believe that we we did it all wrong and the bones are all constructed differently like we just found out that these huge dinosaurs have feathers right and they always had feathers oh some people think that the bones were planted there's no way i mean just like well one thing i did see is that and this is great this is nuts but i looked into dinosaurs a little bit after i watched the whole thing and someone said that oil and gas is called fossil fuels because of the bones and the pressure that is put on them much like jade walnuts except it's pressured them all to basically juice them into oil and gas and that's what we drill and someone has come out and said no oil and gas is is a is a endless resource that's like replenishable and earth produces oil and gas and there's no way that the bones of dinosaurs being pressurized for so many years is creating this thing that and so that was the only thing that i've heard and then it led to a lot of people that were like yeah well dinosaurs never even existed bones are planted etc and there's a guy that just found a leg of a mammoth in like arkansas and it was just like sitting in a river and people like that's the whole it doesn't help one thing i'll never understand as a person and a woman oil that's it's fine though like what's cool about that is a you don't have to worry about that and i'm not going we're on different but like that is just something that every time someone tries to explain it to me in one out the other can i really quickly circle back to the dinosaurs thing yeah so i'm watching this show i think you would like it actually okay i like like david attenborough stuff okay this is morgan freeman i almost said morgan wallen morgan wallen narrating the dinosaur show i bet he would be a dinosaur denier i don't think he gives a if dinosaurs are like you know you'd be like i don't care now one thing that's so amazing about these shows is that they they have the bones they have these things they're talking the rest don't matter but it and it doesn't but the thing about these okay i'm just going to get right to it storytelling is alive and well in the dinosaur documentary that they produce they're talking 17 million years ago yeah they have found these bones and they're saying come and hide from the triceratops with mama they have a mama little dinosaur that's two feet tall and it has babies and they're talking about and now only the sister is alive to tell the story and it's like how do you know and it's like this thing is how do you know that no you need to watch the show actually now that i'm thinking i want to and it's narrated by morgan freeman i want to know i think obviously it's because of his voice that he's chosen for these roles because it's so soothing yeah of course and it demands so much power his voice but i think he's got a voice he has this whole for for he's kind of you know what i'm you know a voice that will carry you home you know who and you know what it takes you all the way to bed a voice will wake you up in the morning put you to bed at night a voice that orders for the table if you know what i mean what to be i do too i'm gonna hold it i don't know if i can i've gotten like quiet get a uti with mama no i don't want to i don't want a uti come on i think i've gotten quiet because i have to pee and there's really something in my throat oh at least it's in your throat what do you mean there's plenty of places that something could be and it wouldn't be in your throat wait let me finish it doesn't matter who gives a what i have to say i do come on have i told you i got a bidet are you using it my dad came to install it dad came to it was my birthday present thanks rich dad oh thanks the rich dad so much rich daddy i love it i love my bidet i don't know how i lived without my bidet my royal throne it keeps my butt nice and warm it's heated seat hi richie your daddy may swim on the duck may swim on the lake but my daddy flew here to install my bidet and he owns the lake thank you thank you i just like i it is true that like once you go bidet you never go you like you you really can't go back hell no hell no well that's really awesome i would look for i've had i've stayed in hotels that have bidets in like vancouver and you really look forward to going home and letting it rip that it because it's like grown i will say um i've noticed that my friends are more comfortable really doing something in my restroom wait what'd you say i said i've noticed that my friends have gotten really comfortable with the bidet oh i see and just i mean letting it rip as as you would say because they know they have that in layman's terms sure layman's terms they know they have that security there uh something i've noticed and i want them to feel comfortable sometimes i i don't want everyone to get too comfortable if you know what i mean are they spending a lot of time in there it's just like tristan channing for sure tristan tristan did one pretty significant number he took a long phone call he took a zoom meeting uh he did this in my place you know what oh i'm very familiar i think he he started a deck in mine and finished the deck and was able to present it to a team did a pitch deck and get feedback yup stayed long enough for the feedback yes i said go ahead and bring in a rum and candle with you yeah because nothing i own is going to be able to take this away what you've done let's just say patrick has not been an angel either patrick is the devil on my bidet let's just say that if you know what a girl means holy moly let's move on i stubbed my toe last night yeah and it got me oh i'm sorry it got me thinking two days thank you the show no there's nothing to thank the toe for now maybe hang on let me get you there let me get you there let me get you there let me get you there so obviously i put my suitcase next to my bed because i needed the other space for earlier in the day so i put it next to my bed and i'm like i i know it's here i'm gonna go to bed i'm not gonna move it out of the way i go pee at in the middle of the night like two in the morning i walk back stub it it hurts yeah and now i have to get into bed and just you know i'm i was about to i had the sleepy so i was holding on to the sleep so you get back in knock but no i'm awake i'm thinking about it i'm going ouch ouch ouch first of all the thing about subbing your toe is i wasn't moving that fast why does this hurt so bad you know i thought you were moving faster than you thought you were but like it's just an unnecessary relation between how fast i was moving and how much pain my toes in two it got me thinking about something wait can you explain what i could have done i'm getting there okay i'm gonna get you there i'm gonna go full circle and i'm gonna okay i'm gonna i'm gonna reconnect the dots for you so then i'm thinking what a privilege it is to have a foot that i'm and and moving legs that were able to stub my toe and the reason the human body thank you the privilege you are so talented it just that wouldn't have occurred to me you will get there i promise you i'm scared that i won't you will thank you it's been two weeks now yeah thank you privilege and that goes beyond of having legs of being able to walk of having a foot that can be stuck thank you the honor thank you the honor of a lifetime yeah you like that yeah that was good okay yeah and now if you can seamlessly integrate it into your life you can do it yeah that's gonna be cherry on top okay sure and then the reason i've been thinking like that is because the other day i posted an instagram story of my dryer yes and it's in my apartment of course i have in in unit washer dryer that like i and it's if it's not clear to people it's not usable because it takes 12 hours to do one small load of laundry because of and it's just it's not an efficient use of electricity and water because it goes and goes it goes because it's the same unit that does both thank you the privilege of course thank you but someone i put i put on my story because it shakes my whole kitchen and all the glasses clink and i had a coffee on the counter it looked like an earthquake and i just posted i was like using my dryer lol and someone was like at least you have legs to walk yeah they skipped at least you have a dryer no two people sent me that said i'm not gonna do the other one the other one was very dark but i was like that's true at least you have legs i was like privilege yeah thank you the privilege thank you the privilege i if i don't pee now like it is gonna happen in the kelly clarkson that's fine you can go i have stuff i can talk well i would like to talk about it with you so how about we just pause okay so how was your pee wait i'm flagging really quickly that now i have a cough drop okay in my mouth so i'm sorry you guys but there's something in my throat there's something in my throat is the second thing yeah i think i need to go to the bladder doctor because i've been noticing recently the frequency in which i have to pee has increased okay by a lot but like not a lot of pee is coming out it's just like an urge do you think it's like age do you ever you ever had this like am i getting old have you ever had this certain urge to put a whole bag of jelly beans up your ass thank you uh yeah it is an age thing thank you i've been getting gray hair aging is a blessing thank you the privilege i should like i wanted to get there myself and i can't you will now that you have that that's a stepping stone to success right at least like using it in the right context right yeah i agree what were you going to say about milking farm earlier then i'm going to read it i'm going to give you your space once again like i did on your half and i'm going to read it and if anyone wants to join me on my milking farm journey i'm going to start on monday well you know the reason i had to press pause is because i needed to start crescent city because i had a dream that akatar was about to be the new akatar was about to be announced wait did alex cooper have her on the podcast yes sarah j mass yes okay do you like is that not like pretty weird did she not have a sarah j massive announcement to give she oh she absolutely did she what was it but before i even get into that is that not like let's acknowledge that like me having that dream and then me having to pause milking farm because i needed to start crescent city right is weird timing let's acknowledge that it's like dust let's acknowledge that yeah no i i do want to do that and i think yeah i'm acknowledging it that's crazy do you understand like what what's like do you know what crescent city is you know what i'm talking about that's her other series that a lot of people have been putting off because it's just very dense okay but you kind of need information from there to continue into the akatar space okay so i had to do that and then i had to do that and then i had to do that and then i had to do that and then i had to do that and then i had to do that and then i had to do that and then i had to a dream an offshoot it's an offshoot okay but there's believed to be an interconnectedness there that would help you and benefit you in the future akatar okay so i had a dream that i was telling you about like a month or so ago i said i have to press pause on milking farm because i think it's time for me to read crescent city because i feel an akatar six announcement coming right a few weeks later yeah my clockwork not only did we get an akatar six announcement we got an akatar seven announcement and then we got an akatar six announcement and then we got an akatar seven announcement and acknowledgement of an akatar eight what how what a cool spot for sarah j mass to be in where she's just like hmm i'm bored let me write seven six and seven and eight well they're really one story but she doesn't want to be bound by the glue that holds pages together so she's introduced she's publishing this same story do you think i do solomons no imagine wanting to be bound by the glue thank you the elmers oh my god you've strayed from the creator's light embarrassed stop i'm embarrassed but you should watch her on call her daddy okay a lot of people like i think that are we're unfamiliar with her or like she's weird or not weird like just like intense like i don't know people are like off put but what people are not realizing i'm in love with this woman yeah by the way like in a way that i've never been in love with a woman yeah yeah yeah yeah what people are not realizing is that she's a nerd trapped in a really really hot person's body and i think that i've seen that several times that's what's throwing everyone off yeah is that you wouldn't question her if she looked more you know she kind of looks like what um frick what's that girl's name i just said frick uh megan pay he pay he yeah she is really does yeah she's extremely beautiful and i think it's throwing a lot of people for a loop yeah she's gorgeous she kind of looks like hillary duff too she's like oh my god speaking of hillary yeah i saw that what oh what did you see just the mic that she was using the other day did you see did anyone see that no it is like crazy what they've done to microphones now like you can because there was like a big back oh do you want me to do this now or should you do you want to finish uh i have something to say about hillary duff but you can do it if you want to do it if you talk about her microphone if you need no no i just saw this discourse online about like they're now making mics because everyone's like no the mic is on like as you can see because people were lip syncing and now they have built the auto-tune and pitch correction into the handheld microphone now how ironic isn't it isn't it ironic and someone was like it's crazy that the thing that ruined jessica simpson's career is now like the norm yeah must be hard but jessica simpson has a very successful line of shoes yeah she's a very successful line of shoes she will be okay um hillary duff went on i think it was jay shetty's podcast the other day yeah and she was talking about how she's had to go no contact with a lot of members of her family particularly hayley duff her sister yeah and i think her dad but i have i had been in a fight with my sister we had we have not spoken in two weeks this is the first time that we like really haven't spoken in two weeks spoken and so i took a pretty big risk comedically and i sent her we had we had been no contact for two i sent her a clip of hillary on jay shetty like with dramatic music playing in the background being like my sister and i are no contact and so i sent that to her and then immediately i went my stomach dropped and i was like i think that wasn't i think it's not gonna land because it was a it was a pretty damn big risk to take yeah freaking slam dunk like that's my sister again now that's awesome yeah so oh that's so fun when you take 100 you miss 100 of the shots you don't take kobe yeah that's so that's so that was really cool i'm happy i actually like i'm sharing that win with you that's amazing one yeah and now have you started talking yeah oh we're completely back i got like a six years ago today thing of me and my sister and i was like this might be the fugliest photo i've ever seen of both of you and she said yuck and that was our conversation yesterday it is kind of just like boom boom sometimes you don't need a lot of words it's she actually said holy yuck holy yuck i like holy yuck yeah holy yuck holy yuck did you see okay wait this is like a fun one this is like a fun one for us to keep up with a space to watch if you will people are seeing bigfoot no no i'm serious for all the people that said nothing ever happens with this you're eating you're about to eat your words for breakfast lunch and supper people are seeing bigfoot there's been like eight sightings in a row and it's real is bigfoot also aka sasquatch yeah but is that like a slur now i mean if it's like an if it's like a person bigfoot the slur if you have bigfoot if you have one bigfoot um i mean it probably will were in like eighth grade if you were being called bigfoot i'm just talking about like the bigfoot community i feel like one of the terms is not accepted anymore it might be sasquatch wait like that that community is like please don't use this word oh well yeah sorry no i'm not i i'm not coming for you i'm just like which one is it i wonder i feel comfortable saying it i do too yeah but i could be open to learning we have always been open to yeah i would like to have a sasquatch or bigfoot expert on but wait can we type in i want to see if this is real like so like it's been coming up a lot like this is like unless i'm on as always as always i'm on like conspiracy theory tiktok which like a big one right now has been people are saying that wisdom teeth actually have a lot of sim cells that help your brain and heart repair themselves i don't know about that i still have mine your heart is fine i'm talking about my brain reports of 10 foot hairy teeth in the ohio woods have bigfoot watchers buzzing so there's been a strange a string of strange sightings that's hard a strange a string of a string of strange sighting whoa a string of a string of saint i'll be the same keep going till you get it thank you the language barrier a string of sightings of large dark and hairy figures in ohio has bigfoot investigators more riled up than they've been in decades according to the bigfoot society so bigfoot is it it's okay it's yeah yeah yeah it's major if the society is saying it it must be okay thank you the bigfoot society that felt better that did feel better no i think you'd say i think you'd say like what is the society like what has brought these people together what is the society for 400 as of tuesday morning at least six locals have reported spotting something in the woods that could be a giant hairy ape man that feels like a slur that does oh my gosh even okay what's crazy okay now i have a connection what i got a text apple is releasing a bigfoot emoji soon they just they just released their emoji list and one of them is oh cool a big hairy man i really like emoji maybe this is like oh no do you think this is press for their new emoji oh the bigfoot sightings yeah honestly connor maybe damn well also like we don't know which one came first the chicken or the egg did the bigfoot sightings come first or did the emoji just like no one ever gives a shit when this team releases a collection of emojis it's like i i agree that it's pr it's emoji pr march 6 in mantua a nine foot brown male spotted near s how do they know it's a male that seems problematic hi i don't chill have you ever considered the fact that bigfoot could be a woman they said ape man right but how would they know good question so it's just something to think about like we always think about bigfoot as a boy and the loctus monster as a girl nessie yeah because of ness yeah who by the way i believe in much more than bigfoot 95 of the ocean is unexplored and it might even be it's in the lake or it's in the lock which is a lake yeah thank you the language barrier yeah it is 100 i'm just saying i meant like waters you know i'm much more likely to believe there's something in the water mine tastes like dust and okay another one an eight foot figure with a deep vibrating grunt oh absolutely thank you the north atlantic that why did you say that i was about five minutes late with messy okay march 9th garrettsville a hiker encountered an eight foot sasquatch in black fur headwaters trail 10 foot and this is on march 9th as well uh an hour and 40 minutes after headwaters trail 10 foot black figure with a stilt like gate and musky odor this is musky odor because how closer and no pictures by the way oh this is pr a six foot brown figure spotted running with an impossibly long stride we need your help if you're in windham garrettsville or the trumbull county line be our eyes and ears check trail cams and security footage listen for deep grunts whoops or hard wood knocks report sightings immediately witness privacy is our priority okay this is pr yeah for big emoji yeah i'm sorry i mean that is a bummer or is it a distraction from the epstein files everything is a distraction from the epstein files yeah stop laughing stupid get this oh my gosh we need to smoke with bigfoot oh that could be hot but get this remember i was telling you about my terrible neighbor yeah i'm almost like scared of like what she could do to me why because i met for the first time one of my other neighbors who like lives in my like my apartment is kind of like someone lives on top of me so i met and i'm like oh my gosh i'm scared of what she could do to me and i'm like him for the first time and he was like excuse me and i obviously always think i'm getting in trouble yeah but he was like um you turn around like what i was like yeah he was asking if i've ever had any issues yeah with the neighbor and i was like yes like i got these notes all over my car just like horrible vibes like she's always calling the police on set like just like horrible apparently she's been calling him slurs and so he asked me if i if it would be okay if he put a pride flag out i started sobbing i said i'm embarrassed that i don't already have one out and then i just ordered a pack of 40 and i'm gonna plant them i might be this is when you're schooling and the way you were raised comes back to play you can be so progressive that it's a bit homophobic to have 40 pride i think so yeah i think they cancel each other out okay then what can i do just i think one would be great okay and i'll just save 39 for for a rainy day yeah thank you the community don't okay i'm okay i will just do the one i don't want to i don't want to yeah 40s well it came in a pack of 40 that's not my maybe put them on her door that is like i could she will she would get me arrested she's cameras everywhere sure but what a horrible person yeah that's painful well you hadn't you had a you had a gut feeling about her oh she's terrible so stay vigilant vigilant that is what i'll say yeah and i'll let you also how could you live in west hollywood and be homophobic that's what i want to know good question it's just statistically your neighbors will be gay statistically speaking right you're just and hers are it's just a numbers game at this point so i love my neighbor good it was nice to talk to him right of course yeah so i'll keep you updated right thank you the connection and let me know if you if anyone here needs a pride flag that's really special are we i think we're wrapping right no oh all right oh well thank you guys for listening i sure had fun in the studio today we never even said that being here oh yeah you're in the studio yeah if you guys are listening audio i'm sitting my fat ass down and listening i'm also contributing and speaking as well thank you guys for listening we'll see you so soon appreciate you tuned appreciate you watch you and um watch the space appreciate you and we'll let you go see ya coca-cola for the big for the small the short and the tall peacemakers risk takers for the optimists pessimists for long distance love for introverts and extroverts the thinkers and 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