Speaker 1Welcome to the Ringer Fantasy Football Show, my name is Danny Heifetz and I'm joined by Danny Kelly and Craig Gorlbeck and today we are ranking tight ends, we're putting them in tiers, giving you some sleepers, but first we have a quick announcement, we mentioned last week that we had an announcement and now we can tell you, our next live show is coming up next month, we are going to be in Los Angeles on August 27th, which is a Thursday, so Thursday August 27th at the Fonda Theater in Los Angeles, which Craig, that's Hollywood baby, we're official now, it's Hollywood.
Speaker 2Right in the middle of Hollywood, we're going full Hollywood, Thirsty Thursday, we'll be there, special guest, just kidding, probably not. But it'll be really fun and you can get tickets soon, Heifetz, what's the ticket situation again? Let them know.
Speaker 3DK, do you know when tickets go on sale?
Speaker 1I bet you don't.
Speaker 3I don't, I'm just here to hang out.
Speaker 1You're just the passenger princess.
Speaker 2He just gets in the Uber and the Uber drives him wherever it takes him.
Speaker 3That's pretty much true.
Speaker 1Tickets go on sale this Wednesday, July 15th, well we're recording this July 9th, full disclosure, but you're hearing this next week, so tickets go on sale July 15th at noon Pacific time, and we're using Pacific time because it's in the Pacific time zone. So noon Pacific, and you can get all the details at theringer.com slash events.
Speaker 2Why would you have to specify why you said Pacific time? Because I'm, because I want to. Because he just can't help himself. No, I can't. He cannot live with the idea that PT, he bristles at the idea of using Pacific time.
Speaker 3I do, it does, I don't live there, it's annoying.
Speaker 2The show's in LA, you didn't have to say noon PT, we're saying PT because we'll be on the West Coast.
Speaker 1No, I did. Everyone on the East Coast is like, thank you. Thank you for the solidarity I represent. Anyway, yeah, so theringer.com slash events, tickets will be there at noon Pacific on July 15th, and the show is Thursday, August 27th. All the details are in the episode description, and again, everything is at theringer.com slash events, so check it out there, and we do recommend getting the tickets right at noon Pacific if you want to make sure you can go. So we'll see you there. With that said, we're going to get into tight end rankings. What's so funny, DK?
Speaker 4What's so funny? Your time zone thing is just funny to me. You have an obsession.
Speaker 2Well, I'm sorry, I've been radicalized, but you're calling one. Saying noon PT is fine, that's normal, but then you having to qualify while you said PT is fucking weird. You don't need to do that.
Speaker 1Look, I've been radicalized ever since you guys started just calling the first kickoff of the day of the morning games. It's really radicalized me. That's all I'll say.
Speaker 4We've lived, again, we've lived on the Pacific time zone our whole life.
Speaker 1Okay, I know, and I live in the East Coast.
Speaker 4I've lived all 43 of my years over here, pal.
Speaker 1Everything I do for work. I have to convert everything to West Coast time in my head, and I sometimes, it's just like, okay, I convert it, and that's fine, but I just, when I say it out loud, I always feel dumb, so it's fine. That's it.
Speaker 4Okay, we can move on. Yeah, we can. I will say. Tight end, I enjoy it.
Speaker 2We're going to do tight ends, sleepers, tears, fears, but stick around to the end of the episode. We will be unveiling the first four of the official hot quarterback rankings of the top 16. We're doing 16 to 13 today, so that's after the tight end conversation. The hottest. 16 to 13.
Speaker 4Also, Craig's Millennial Bangers series continues, correct? Of course. Hell yeah.
Speaker 1So, I want to talk about tight ends today, and I wanted to just, a quick note on why we do tears, because we're going to go through rankings, but we're really going to talk about them in tears, and it's really simple. It's just like, when you're doing a draft, rankings are cool and easier for us to make, but realistically, rankings are kind of a flawed thing when you get into the middle of your draft, and you're like, well, they have, this guy's 60th, and this other guy's 61st, and it's like, well, we wish we could see your team, and so the team that's going to win is going to be the team that's going to win. So, tears kind of allow you to track supply and demand as you go, because if you see there's one guy left in a tight end tier you liked, and five guys left in a receiver tier you like, you should probably take the tight end, even if he's two spots below the receiver we ranked. And so, it just helps you, and it just helps, I think you'll hear us as we go, it helps you figure out how you really feel about people, is being able to bucket them. So, it's just, it's honestly the most important exercise I think you could do, is just tiering people in these positions before your draft. I don't, do you guys agree, if you could tell people to give one thing that actually required some time and effort before your draft, I would actually say it's tiering. The positions and players.
Speaker 4Yeah, absolutely, because it, like as you said, it helps you if one tier, say your receiver tier is almost over, and you've got like eight guys in your running back tier, you definitely want to focus on the receiver there, just because you don't want to fall off of that next, into that next tier. So, it's just a construct to help you when you're drafting, get the best value for what you see as, you know, the players at certain positions.
Speaker 2I spend so much time thinking about which sleeper tight end to draft every year. They really are. The quagmire of fantasy football. Yeah. The awkward stepchild. You don't know who, every year I'm like, which guy am I going to take in the middle rounds that's going to pop? And it usually just doesn't matter, and they all end up scoring eight fantasy points per game, other than like the top two. It really, that really is how it goes with tight ends. I'm always like, I'm going to be the guy who round eight, I'm taking Hunter Henry this year, he's going to pop. They all just average eight points per game. Great.
Speaker 4And I, the difference between tight ends, so last year, the difference between tight end six, which was Kyle Pitts, and tight end 17, which was Dalton Schultz, is like one and a half points per game. Totally.
Speaker 2And I think this year specifically, so we talked about quarterbacks last episode with the memento tattoos and about how quarterback's a little bit deeper now, and maybe late round quarterback is back. Over the last like three or four years, my strategy has kind of been like, get one of the elite quarterbacks, wait on tight end, because I kind of think you can't get both. You know, you really want to fill up on running backs and wide receivers in your first like four rounds. So I think getting like a Josh Allen and a Brock Bowers is hard to do while filling out the rest of your roster. But I think this year, like I said, usually I would rather get that elite quarterback and wait on tight end. This year, I think I'm going to switch that. I actually think getting Brock Bowers or Trey McBride in the first three rounds and then waiting on quarterback is going to be my move heading into this year, because I do think tight end is very young. I think it's very hard to predict this year. I'm not, I think outside of Bowers and McBride, you don't. You don't really know. So I, and with quarterback, I think you can go 12, 13, 14 deep and feel pretty confident. So I think this year, Haifetz, do you agree that early tight end and late quarterback is a strategy this year you like?
Speaker 1Probably. I have mixed emotions because I love Brock Bowers. I'm a little scared of how much I love Brock Bowers. I feel like if he falls to me, I want Brock Bowers. But then if he doesn't, I love Trey McBride, but I'm scared of taking a Cardinals player that I think Cardinals would be the worst team in the NFL. And I'm really hesitant of the middle tight ends. I kind of feel like if I don't get Brock Bowers, I actually, I'm pretty, I'm actually pretty content to wait till the end for a tight end. And because of what DK just said, where it's flat. Yeah, that's it. Scott Barrett does a great job. Fantasy points is, I mean, it's a website called fantasy points, but they also write about fantasy points. But Scott Barrett does this great distribution of tight ends where it's like, and sometimes we're guilty of this, of using shorthand for he was the ninth best tight end, but that doesn't matter. What matters is how many points they score for you. And if they were on a graph, you couldn't distinguish the ninth tight end from the 26 tight end very well. It's like you kind of throw in a dart and even that's an average, assuming you played them in some random spike week they had in week four. And if you didn't, then the whole thing's a mess anyway. So I don't think there's a huge gap. So I think to create your point, Craig, if you don't get an elite one, I'm okay waiting. And I'm curious where you guys feel that cutoff is because we can go through it. But that's the part that I'm really interested in. When is the point where you're like, I don't even care anymore. There's no difference to me between these guys and the guys who can get eight tight ends later.
Speaker 4Well, it could be even wider this year to have it's because everybody's sort of following this trend where you have more tight ends on the field and tight ends are a bigger part of your off. Yeah. So you could, you could even have more like it's just playing whackable every week.
Speaker 2I feel like it's why I think Bowers and McBride, I think I'm going to try to get one of those guys this year and I'll wait and I'll take Brock Purdy or Justin Herbert or something.
Speaker 1And it's the, it is the defining. It's one of, it's probably the defining X's and O's real life football strategy story entering this season too. Two tight ends. Yeah. Two tight ends, even three tight ends, you know, without going too deep into it. Basically it was the most two tight end sets we've had in, in decades and decades and three. Multiple tight end sets are just completely back. And ironically it was Sean McVay who really started this last year because Sean McVay sent multiple tight ends off the field. Like when Sean McVay first started with the Rams, it was all three receiver sets. Everything looks the same.
Speaker 5Right.
Speaker 1And in a full way, basically they came back to having more tight ends around the field, but it almost makes it harder to figure out who's who to play. Sometimes it's kind of like whack-a-mole.
Speaker 4So yeah, it is fun. That is a funny point. Heifetz McVay basically, well, he wasn't the only one, but he was a big part. They, they did three receiver sets almost all the time. That was like,
Speaker 1all they did was 98% of the time in 2017.
Speaker 4They were in part, you know, part of the reason that team started shifting to smaller defenses. You get more fast for linebackers. You get more safeties on the field to combat these three receiver sets. And then he's like, actually got you a switch. I'm going to go back to doing three tight. I'm going to run it down your throat, all this stuff. Basically we're going to counter all your small defenses. You stay ahead of the curve.
Speaker 2You set the trend and then you zag against it.
Speaker 4Yeah. It's kind of, it's Belichickian. So I don't know why, but that bothered me. Belichickian, Belichick, Belichickian. It didn't sound right coming out.
Speaker 1It is spelled Belichick. Do you think that it was pronounced that way? And then they just stopped saying it that way. Cause it's like football. They can't say Belichick. I bet it is Belichick.
Speaker 6Yeah.
Speaker 1Is that Jordan, Jordan Hudson? She's the Belichick. Jordan and Belichick. Jordan Belichick. She's Belichick.
Speaker 2Jordan, Jordan Belichick. That's going to be her name.
Speaker 1I don't know.
Speaker 2Are they going to get married?
Speaker 1That's your name? Let's get to the tight end tears. And again, the way this loosely works. is a tier is for better or worse kind of you could move them around in any order and you wouldn't be it wouldn't be crazy but outside the tiers to be a little crazier so tier one it's a good example this which is we have brock bowers first for the raiders and then trade mcbride for the cardinals second we both have them as like top 25 players you can you know we'll see exactly where we end up slotting them as the season goes but dk i've been very high on brock bowers i'm a little weird too high in brock bowers but how do you feel about bowers this year do you think he's like definitively the number one type raiders tight end well i mean i think an nfl tight end i don't
Speaker 4know definitively because it is funny looking back at what uh mcbride did trade mcbride did last year it was absolutely absurd the numbers that he put up i just think we're kind of projecting that he's not going to maybe be able to hit quite those highs this next year with a new offense new offense coordinator potentially more running from that offense all that stuff so i think bowers to start with clint kubiak calling him a football robot from heaven feels good feels like a good right like a first-time player i think he's going to be a good first thing that you really want the head coach to say when he's coming in right and installing a new offense he's a football robot from heaven like imagine if bill simmons was like dk is a podcasting robot from heaven i feel pretty good about myself i feel like i'll be on a lot of pods if that's the case cr is kind of a podcast chris ryan is the podcast robot or van maybe you know he's he's just really versatile um but yeah so i i think i am both simultaneously very excited about brock bowers and also just a little wary about calling him a football robot from heaven the new jsn and the kubiak like j like kubiak's new jsn is kind of like the bull case for who's saying that high fits you've said it a few times it is fun to think about said it the last episodes realistically like he's not he's he's a tight end he's not a receiver he's not going to be used in the same way that jsn is used jsn ran the vast majority of his routes from the outside last year he only ran 17 of his routes from the slot last year bowers is at almost 60 last year it's just a different proposition that i think he's going to be a focal point in this offense especially if you look at the raiders receivers like the raiders receivers you just don't have anyone with any star power no one's going to be you know designing their defensive structure around any of these receivers week in and week out it's going to be how do we stop bowers and i think kubiak is smart enough to know bowers is their top playmaker and he's going to make a big part of the offense move the guy around you're going to have michael mayer be sort of the inline tight end and then bowers can do a little bit of everything but calling him the jsn of the offense is is a little bit of a i think a little misleading because bowers is not being utilized on deep routes nearly as much or probably can't be um and so it's a little bit different but all that being said i'm still
Speaker 1really excited about bowers i'm glad you're checking me on this dk because i think you're right that like i probably been saying that as a shorthand too much i don't mean that brock bowers will literally be used as jackson smith the jigba like he's not the same player he you're right it won't be this depth the same depths of routes and all that stuff what i mean is that clint kubiak make the point of the raiders passing game to get the football to bowers it would be in a different mechanism but the point of the steve's passing game was basically to get the ball to jackson smith and jigba and that's what i'm trying to say is that the reason i like brock bowers so much is i really do think the point of um half of the raiders dropbacks will be just get brock the football god i just trust him to do that it will look differently but i think it will also be i mean brock bowers is rookie year i will never forget him just burning trent mcduffie straight straight up not from inline but from inline and he's going to be the one that's going to be the as a receiver out wide burning trent mcduffie who's the first tmall pro cornerback who just got traded for first run pick to the rams just as a tight end that's kind of what we always talk about but never really happens i i think he's he'll never forget that he'll never forget that
Speaker 4i'll be on my deathbed talking about it bowers had 153 targets as a rookie dude i i think i hear
Speaker 2you guys about being hesitant don't i just don't overthink this yeah what are we his rookie year brock bowers set the tight ends catch record by like 20 catches he had his rookie year this was 12 catches 1100 yards as a fucking rookie tight end on the raiders who he was catching passes from gardner minshu and aiden o'connell that was the situation two years ago and he had 112 catches
Speaker 11100 yards and five touchdowns it was the saying brock bowers had the most catches ever as a rookie for a tight end is underselling it because he had the second most catches for any but for any rookie ever the only including receivers the only rookie who's had more catches than brock bowers in the
Speaker 2rookie year is pukutukua like of all players we have clint kubiak we have what we feel like is a dependable kirk cousins maybe mendoza eventually which i think we have to like that that is a few notches above what the raiders have been dealing with the past two seasons like this is this is
Speaker 1rock solid just take him don't think about it so is the just do it i agree i feel that way strongly my fear is trey so trey mcbride who i mean won the crutch ruple crown basically a tight end last year him as targets and catches and yards and touchdowns he was the number he had almost 100
Speaker 4tight end last year yeah in half ppr that's the fear is he had almost 100 more points there was a lot of uh tight end injuries last year though to be to be clear i think that was part of it he played 17 hours yeah hi if it's continue i i i don't know if you want to get into mcbride but the numbers last year are pretty crazy and it's it's hard to see him kind of recreating that especially in a new offense i think the biggest thing is last year the cardinals and michael fleur comes from arizona or sorry comes to arizona from la and he was with the rams with matt stafford the rams had a 57 pass rate so you know that's like way that's something like 20 something in the league it's a much more balanced type offense i think philosophically they're going to try to run the ball they drafted her running back with a third pick so um i just think the environment is going to change dramatically for mcbride which sucks
Speaker 1they also run a contract thing he wants more money and he's like i was the starter you need to pay me he's and they're like well you went 1 and 11 so we don't want to uh and we'll see how that goes if carson back is quarterback it's gonna be it's gardner minshu from the injury or yeah carson beck who i think carson beck will be playing down the stretch that's the other issue with with trey mcbride where it's like if fernando mendoza is playing i trust fernando mendoza quarterback for the raiders in december or kirk cousins more than i trust the cardinals maybe putting in carson beck which maybe there's a chance that trey mcbride is really good and then you're in your fantasy world and then you're in your fantasy world and then you're in your fantasy world playoffs and carson beck is throwing to trey mcbride because the cardinals are tanking and want to see how carson beck does and that would also suck which i think is that's a perfectly fine tiebreaker but these are the top two tight ends and you know that's i i don't really it's kind of where we slot them among skill players then there's not really a conversation about
Speaker 2that it's just where i think you could go either way i think you probably kick yourself more if the cardinals are terrible and trey mcbride is struggling and you're watching brock bowers catch passes from kirk cousins in the kubiak offense and you're like why didn't i just do that and the cardinals i do agree they brought in isaac say molo the the guard they drafted a guard they drafted jeremiah love they brought in tyler algier like this team is i feel like signaling that they want to run the bar and run the ball more and be more balanced also their schedule is nuts the first like eight games i don't know it just could be a real mess on that team but sometimes you have to look through that and it's not like the cardinals have been great the last three seasons and trey mcbride's been pretty damn good but um and he's way better with brissette than he was with kyler murray we should say that from a touchdown perspective and i think that's a good perspective he had seven touchdowns in 39 games with kyler murray and he had 10 and 12 games with
Speaker 1jacoby brissette so so as we get closer this season we'll figure out where exactly we put these guys but i feel like brock bowers is gonna be the middle of the second round right and it's gonna be a question of like do you take if not rock bowers or yeah you know saquon nico collins marion hampton these guys ashen genti like you know i think if you want to if you want to drop
Speaker 2the pass catcher which one where does the where do you draw the line on wide receivers before you take brock bowers i just think the same yeah you take them over justin jefferson or cd lamb or a monora i mean you talking you're talking about
Speaker 4the kyler murray not being able to throw touchdown passes thing and i'm like oh god maybe i do not want justin jefferson and i do want brock bowers that that was my first thought i was like oh man
Speaker 1is that going to carry over um don't love that i think you're worried about justin jefferson with
Speaker 4no not really but like just you saying that in connection with how high do you take bowers i'm
Speaker 2after that tier of guys like puka monra cd and justin jefferson i think right after that and right before like nico collins drake london rishi rice i think brock bowers that's the right spot
Speaker 1for him yeah that's fine yeah that works for me all right the next tier here we have tyler warren for the colts we have colson loveland for the bears and then we've tucker craft for the packers first of all dk do you agree with this that tyler warren should be ranked over colson loveland
Speaker 4um that's i mean it's tough that's a really hard one i think they're so close in my mind i think colson loveland it's funny because they had an inverse they had inverse seasons as rookies basically tyler warren started out the gate was awesome um he was averaging nine points a game in the first 10 weeks the colts were on fire he had a 21 target rate in that stretch he had 50 catches for 600 yards and three touchdowns
Speaker 1through 10 games sal sal took him in the ringer league in like the sixth round a rookie tight end with like in like 60th overall we were like you're an idiot and then sal immediately looked like a
Speaker 4and i mean so he was doing awesome to start the year and then things fell apart for the colts it wasn't his fault necessarily which i think is what makes me bullish on him going forward is if they can kind of right the ship offensively um but because he had a 20 target rate in the second and from week 11 on he still had a 20 target rate so his target rate only went down one percent
Speaker 1does that matter if it's phil rivers what do you do with that if it's phil rivers i think it does go football for five years what do we do with the target rate um right i don't know but he averaged
Speaker 4five points a game and he's still a target rate so he's still a target rate so he's still a target rate It's as far as he can throw it. I think that's why. tyler warren was getting those targets but i think i think he's a by the dip guy and i didn't i don't
Speaker 1have any problem by the dip what are you talking about you're paying up for him i think by the second half struggles i guess whatever the tip for the third rank guy of a rookie okay maybe i said
Speaker 4that wrong but anyways i think if you're if you're by the peak if you prefer colston loveland over him i'm not like going to throw up i'm not going to put up a stink about that just because i think the way he finished the way that they utilized him in the offense colson loveland for the bears i mean um the way he was used more vertically downfield as a number as a true number one receiver because warren was more of a dump off run after catch guy and loveland was like running legit receiver route so i think if you like that more i don't fault you i just think warren is going to get a shitload of volume this year um that's a big thing i think if i had to to split
Speaker 2hairs i would say warren is a slightly more floor play and loveland is slightly more of a ceiling play i think warren's just a horse out there you know yeah and pitman's gone client sale alec pierce has got this foot injury and the first 10 weeks of the season tyler warren fourth and routes run at the tight end position fourth and touches per game at the tight end position like they were just using him so much he fucking runs in touchdowns he can throw the ball like he can punt i i he might be like the centerpiece of the passing game um for the colts and loveland i think there's a slightly more uncertainty it's like a lot of what loveland did was when roma dunzey was hurt at the end of last year and the offense is going to look we don't know and caleb williams is a little bit more volatile and with roma dunzey luther burden and colson levin like we haven't really seen that trio as you know and what that's going to look like so but i do think like what dk said loveland's the explosion the downfield stuff like i think you could have bigger 130 yard games out of loveland but if you want like five catches for 68 yards in a touchdown every week i feel like tyler warren's
Speaker 1disagreement i mean it's freaking july we've reserved the right to change our minds but this is right now i think one of the bigger disagreements we have with like consensus or whatever among people other people rank fantasy is just that a lot of people have colson loveland third and tyler warren fourth by a pretty good amount actually and i'm surprised by that for a number of reasons uh that we can get into but i mean it's they're going to be tied for their whole careers because colson loveland was the 10th pick out of michigan to the bears and then you know tyler warren was drafted with the colts it was a great tight end draft and they were both in you know tyler warren immediately delivered colson loveland was great down the stretch so they're going to be tied in real life forever but it's funny to me to see such a big gap between them and i don't totally understand it i but i i look at colson loveland you guys know when you're like excited to go get go to a restaurant or get a sandwich or something or ice you're walking around and you're like excited to
Speaker 2go and then you turn the corner excited to get a sandwich i don't know i'm just i'm hungry man i
Speaker 1know where's he going but i'm like you know when you turn the corner and you go and you're going somewhere for whatever and you turn the corner and there was just a giant line yeah and you're like oh my god i'm so excited to get a sandwich and then you turn the corner and there's just a oh my god fuck other people happened to me last night dude what was it where are you going we were
Speaker 2gonna go get ice cream at this place called big jill which was like a very normal like mom and pop ice cream spot that liz grew up with and then it like a year ago somebody like it got big on tiktok and now you cannot go without waiting for 30 minutes to get fucking ice cream happened to
Speaker 1me in florence on my honeymoon i won't name the place because it's overrated and i don't want to be mean but there's this place that went viral we went and we were like what the defeat no the but anyway colston loveland's how i feel about that your big chill ice cream where i'm like i'm in the season i was like man i can't wait to get this guy colson levels are so good the bears ben johnson i love the coach i love the quarterback he's great he was amazing down the stretch and then i like turn the corner and i'm like he's going 38th ahead of joe burrow what what do you do i i can't and i'm like all right it's good but it's not this good i feel like you're waiting for philly cheesesteak in philadelphia i'm like all right pats is not worth a two-hour wait because i i we can go into it but fun fact the first half for colston loveland do you know where he the first eight games of the season do you know where he ranked among tight ends 34th not even close 79th 50th he was the 50th tight end in the first time he had 17 total points in the first eight games of the season yeah he's a rookie tight end who was a backup i know he was a popular sleeper colston loveland's drafted about 100th overall he was like a 10th or 11th but he was a popular sleeper colston loveland's drafted about 100th overall he was like a 10th or 11th but he was a popular sleeper colston loveland's drafted about 100th overall he was like a 10th or 11th but he was a popular sleeper colston loveland's drafted about round pick and if you tattem you almost certainly caught him and then someone else picked him up and then that person got him for the playoffs which is like infuriating so but then down the
Speaker 4kill point he makes a good point here though he was hurt he was uh nursing a shoulder injury in training camp so that's gonna hurt your first half of the year i'm not holding it against him
Speaker 1i'm just saying it was a snip snap year the first i do remember our producer nikhil wants to let you
Speaker 2know hyphus that colston loveland missed most he's like how i'm glad you sir i'm glad nikhil
Speaker 1brought that up at the combine he didn't do any comment stuff his shoulder was immobilized he missed the whole uh otas minicamp everything he was behind we always talk about how rookies missing that stuff in training camp it sets you back on timeline and you're already drinking from a fire hose it really does slow you down and that is what happened with him especially ben johnson offense down the stretch colston love was fantastic but when people have him like as a top 40 player i just feel like at that point now i'm a little worried because he was so good down the stretch he was the second best tight end basically from week nine on but my thing is i feel like it's really important to have a good tight end and i feel like it's really important to have a good all these like underlying models and projections are over indexing the colson loveland's best three games were against like the worst defenses in the nfl like i looked at he had 55 percent of colson loveland's fantasy points were against the bangles the niners and the lions the last two games like the bangles were the worst defense in the league and were the first team to have like two rookie linebackers for a season in like 13 years so the worst defense against tight ends
Speaker 2in like 10 years yeah yeah yeah okay all the defenses are bad couldn't couldn't you bell curve this though couldn't you be like you can do all that and then you could also be like he was the 10th pick in the draft and if you watch him you could fucking good you could he's great absolutely i might be you could and ben johnson is the coordinator yeah but this is why we do tear
Speaker 1yeah exactly i'm just saying it seems like everyone else is i just saying the niners defense had allowed 30 points entering the fourth quarter to phil rivers the week before and the lions were the most injured defense of the nfl i'm just saying that those are the games he's great fresh though so it was fresh well here's my question what with like and to your point roma didn't say it was hurt i i'm confused why there's a 30 like three round difference between loveland and warren and we all looked at this and we're like yeah they're about even and then you check and i'm like i don't really see why colston loveland should be going 38th but tyler warren should be going you know almost in the sixth or seventh round i completely agree that i was talking about
Speaker 2it's a dip i i completely agree with you i i think tucker craft colston loveland and tyler warren should just all be very close to one another and they should be later on you they should be going around like 60th in my opinion but i do believe that loveland belongs in the same tier as tyler warren yeah
Speaker 1yeah and that's the thing is i don't i i it sucks too because like colson i could i agree what you said about ceiling i could see colson loveland and tyler warren both being in the brock bowers mcbride tier next year i can see like four truly elite tight ends in the nfl i just i don't know just
Speaker 2like really high i think there's a little bit of just like the bears are cool and sexy and caleb williams and like they had a bunch of cool plays and the colts are fucking boring colts are lame they have daniel jones and they ended the season with philip rivers and they and it's like if the bears the bears are the most fun team in the nfl caleb williams on the madden cover whoa there's famous people in the bills are on the brown uh bears yeah i think that's a little
Speaker 1bit a little bit of it i just yeah i just i like i like colson loveland it's just a long line that's all can we do a little bit on tucker craft because i do want to mention him i think i do think he
Speaker 2belongs in this tier with loveland and warren tucker craft before he got he tore his acl in week nine week eight week nine uh was that in eight games yeah yeah was the number two tied in in fantasy had was completely was a huge hit like he was a lot of people's sleeper or like you know upside pick coming into last year and it totally paid off he was like first in yards per touch first in epa per target first in yards after the catch he was basically george kittle and even if you combined him with wide receivers like the shit he was doing on a yards per touch he was like alec pierce christian watson jameson williams and tucker craft um and then he tore his acl which is obviously a huge thing he tore it midway through the season he said he expects he said his conditioning is great they always talk about how fast you reach now like in the offseason it's like brandon ayuk was running 22 miles an hour tucker craft i guess hit 21 point whatever miles an hour and the offseason that's cool he says he feels great his quote my quads look great swelling is minimal to none like no weird pains and aches coming out of my treatment and my training so we're really excited to get the ball rolling i plan to start in week one with no pitch count and the acl is a huge thing but if you if you can get the ball convince yourself that like it will be okay man do i like tucker craft like i was talking about my wide receiver upside uh formula i like a lot of what i see with green bay i like the play caller i like the quarterback and i like the volume dobs and wicks are gone that's 130 targets it's a little bit more condensed now i even think the amount of times that green bay threw to tucker craft with all those other guys last year was pretty good so if he's healthy i think tucker graphs is an
Speaker 4awesome pick what do you make of this dk i i think tucker craft could be one of the best tight ends in the nfl so with i want to put that first in that real life or fantasy in in real life like the more tattoos he gets it's like they're powering they're powering up him he is just doing the super mario brothers power up every time he gets a new tattoo it's like george kittle
Speaker 1um he is an excellent tucker craft is an excellent locker and probably you're right about that that the gap between what people think of tucker craft and how good he is is just a real life tight end it's very he's a very very high up in the rankings tight end
Speaker 4uh real life and and so like i want that to be sort of how I start this but I think there is a little bit of risk with him relative to some of the other guys in this range just because of the pure volume that we see he was a little bit dependent on touchdowns and big plays he had a couple of these plays where he I can't remember exactly but he would get free and run for like 70 yards and I think some of those were boosting his play early
Speaker 2on he only averaged four catches per game but they're boosting his play because he's good
Speaker 4like right I know but the point is like how repeatable is that I don't know the question I think maybe if he is George Kittle then yes it's pretty well it's and it's also scheme related
Speaker 2which I think could be repeatable to succeed yeah I don't you're you're I don't doubt him
Speaker 4necessarily I just think he was he was like objectively more reliant on big plays last year and touchdowns so that makes me a little bit nervous but that doesn't mean I don't think he can do it going forward either I think he's just awesome he might also just be really awesome
Speaker 1at football so Tucker Kraft he reminds me of a couple players entering this season and it's like TJ Hawkinson and Sam Laporta and I say Sam Laporta not stylistic I mean Tucker Kraft's a better tight end probably in real life than Sam Laporta Sam Laporta is not a great blocker Tucker Kraft is but it reminds me Sam Laporta's rookie year he had like 900 yards and 10 touchdowns and it was like you can kind of have the exact same season in catches yards and have half the touchdowns by luck and then everyone's really mad that they drafted you what we always say about quarterbacks we're like Baker was Baker Mayfield's going it's like the sixth quarterback last year and we're like he's not gonna throw 40 touchdowns again that's not gonna happen and then he didn't and Tucker Kraft to your point DK my fear is Tucker Kraft could have a perfect ACL recovery like and Stefania Bell who's like the best injury person out there was saying that Tucker Kraft is right in that window for an ACL recovery where he probably be if everything stays to the schedule Tucker Kraft can be fully healed for the season she wrote the great article he's been about that my issue is that Tucker Kraft could have the same season with the same catches same yard same uses in the offense everything but Jane Reed doesn't like break his get a Jones fracture and break his collarbone two weeks into the season and then Tucker Kraft just has the same year but he has five touchdowns on the whole year instead of like being on pace for 13. And then you're kind of mad that you took him over I don't know Jaden Daniels and that's my issue with Tucker Kraft because I think you're both right he's exactly that kind of player but you're taking on the risk that there's any decrease in athleticism off the ACL which even if it doesn't present immediately it could develop in November and December which sometimes is annoying but you're also just like all right but what if he doesn't have the touchdown explosiveness but it's
Speaker 2the same player otherwise yeah I think he's the last quarterback he's the last tight end where I'm truly like I don't really have a lot of notes about like this team or this environment and I feel like he is if he's healthy he's relatively safe if Tucker Kraft never tore
Speaker 1his ACL and did and roughly stayed on a similar pace the rest of the season where would we rank
Speaker 2him he'd be in tier one if Tyler if Tucker Kraft had like a thousand yards and 12 touchdowns he'd
Speaker 1be well fewer the touchdowns came down let's say he'd start he started with 500 yards at six and then he had another 500 yards and then had like two more so if he had a thousand yards and eight
Speaker 2touchdowns I think he'd be in tier one yeah that's the question he tore his ACL Brock Bowers has never had a thousand yards in a touchdown like well I mean that's about as good as it gets for a tight end I guess sometimes they can get higher in the touchdown but Mark but yeah I think he would be above Loveland and Warren and infringe with McBride and Bowers I think that yeah
Speaker 1this is the right ranking the question as we get closer to this I don't know he's going right now
Speaker 2around like Brian Thomas and Carnell Tate like I don't know that that feels like a good pick to me
Speaker 1and I think it's an interesting point because this is the this is the important cutoff is this these top two tiers and then the bottom two tiers and then the bottom two tiers and then the bottom two is like the worst bet in fantasy is like the tier three tight ends that is like eyeball tested it's also actually like if you look at analytics and stats JG Zacharyson did a great uh podcast last year about uh this like tight end dead zone which is trying to fill out the back of the top 10 like the seventh eighth ninth tight end it's like someone's got to sit someone's got to be eighth and it's always you know it's the Kyle Pitts tier it's what it is it's it's usually David and Joker are cooked so now it's Kyle Pitts we have Harold Fannin as on the Browns is the sixth tight end Kyle Pitts is the seventh tight end and Sam Laporte is the eighth tight end and it's weird because all of these guys all had unbelievable rookie seasons as tight ends Harold Fannin only had a rookie season Kyle Pitts has not really been the same since and then the two games last year they're amazing Sam Laporte had an amazing rookie year and then not a great one and we're all they're all kind of similar and like what if they just do the rookie year again but traditionally this has been a very good year for them and they're all kind of similar and like what if they just do the rookie year again but traditionally they're all kind of similar and like what if they
Speaker 4bad bucket of player yes and I think maybe I completely agree is this the year we finally
Speaker 1have more good tight ends so what do we do with Kyle Pitts let's just fucking get to it what do we do with this motherfucker he's the seventh tight end what are we what are we doing with him
Speaker 4I think him being the tight end seven feels like a value even though I know what every year we get excited about Kyle Pitts like based on what he did last year feels exactly right to me it I feel like he has more upside than what we're giving him credit for I guess but the Kevin Stefanski is the new coach there is it going to be uh Tua or is it going to be Penix there's a lot of question marks there but like last year he averaged seven targets a game which was 30 averaged five targets a game or receptions a game which was third and 54 receiving yards a
Speaker 1game which was like he was a top five tight end hits his averages though don't he was Kyle Pitts and Colston Loveland were just feet in the freezer head in the oven and we're calling it averages room temperature but for Colston Loveland it was injury in the Bears offense coming together and for the Penix as the quarterback for the Falcons for the first three months Kyle Pitts was literally the 20th tight end Kyle Pitts was basically worse than useless and then once Kirk Cousins came in Kyle Pitts was better than Colston Loveland Kyle Pitts was the second tight end only to trade McBride once Kirk Cousins came in and so the question to me is who plays if it's Tua how much of Tua can replicate what Kirk Cousins did even though it's a different offense it's not exactly the same but it really comes down to this DK to cut the matter to the bone we have Kyle Pitts ranked right now 78th are you going to take him there or not
Speaker 4I feel like you won't let me add this let me add this taking all personal bias out of it sure no
Speaker 1into it it's your team you're picking no one's going to see what are you doing in private you're going to take him or not in the privacy of your own privacy of your own home when you're sitting
Speaker 2on the toilet drafting on your phone what are you going to do making sure I'm not attached to
Speaker 4bluetooth anywhere in the house yes I'm going to make sure I'm probably not going to draft Kyle Pitts just because of the quarterback situation how far does he have to fall to take him
Speaker 2I don't know I mean I would take him above a round or two I would take him above everybody in that next year but I want to add one thing about high fits his point the like head in the freezer foot in the oven or whatever um yeah Kyle Pitts at that one game right 166 yards and three touchdowns Kyle Pitts only had three games last year where he had more than 70 receiving yards that only happened three times and they were back to back to back all three of those games are when Drake London wasn't playing and it was with Kirk Cousins so I don't know I'm like you know that
Speaker 1same stat exactly I think applies to uh uh Colson Loveland oh yeah well he did everything I said that without
Speaker 2when he missed the last five weeks of the season um so I don't know I'm like with London the quarterback situation I think seventh or eighth is fine can I tell you something I think that's
Speaker 1fine maybe this is unhealthy I loved this ranking for Kyle Pitts and was pretty prepared to target him in this range when he was in a contract year and Kyle Pitts getting part of me is a little like you know there's been questions about him earlier in his career I don't know but I see tagged he was tagged right yes but then he signed an extension because you get the you actually have till July 15th to sign um at a contract extension but he signed a three-year deal which I don't know it usually matters people in contract year like it matters for Kyle Pitts you see the players all the time so I I just feel like honestly I I would be lying if I said I wasn't really colored by my experience in the ringer fantasy league where Kyle Pitts would get me one point and two points and three and one like under four is so insulting it sticks with you but I I that's tight end for you that's but but also two could just pepper him I don't know yeah so we'll see the other ones here Harold Fannin if Harold Fannin was on the Patriots I think he'd be a goddamn phenomenon Harold Fannin yeah but he's not I know he's not but he's
Speaker 4here's the here's the key point he's on the Browns man that's kind of tough one of the
Speaker 1best rookie seasons ever for a tight end after having the most yards per out run in college ever
Speaker 2for a tight end basically the the stink of the Browns is really doing so much to like make you not care about how good Harold Fannin and Quinshawn Judkins looked last year oh yeah like the fact that they have Concepcion they have Boston Fannin and Judkins if they and Judy if sure if they were like had a normal quarterback and were a normal organization I'd be like the Browns are the next team yeah and Monken too like I
Speaker 1mean kind of excited about what Monkey this is why we need name brand we're gonna do the consulting agency where we're gonna like name we need to rebrand the Cleveland Browns as something else
Speaker 2we'd be like look at this team if somebody was like dude Subway has an incredible new sandwich you'd be like I don't know I don't know if I'm gonna trust that is that right Subway has such
Speaker 4a distinctive smell we talked about this in Indianapolis you can smell a Subway a mile away just what other places are like overwhelming smell I think Chipotle has a smell Chipotle's
Speaker 1Subway has a smell yeah you just know when you're near a Subway has a smell yeah I haven't been in and out in a minute yeah we should go when we're in Los Angeles in August we should be sure DK have
Speaker 2you been in and out Pacific Times one time a very long time ago you've only been in and out once yeah in your fucking life yeah holy shit what the hell what have we been doing I don't know
Speaker 1um were you just saying your dad thought that instead of ordering animal style the off-menu thing at In-N-Out he ordered doggy style yeah this was like 40 years ago I don't know I don't know
Speaker 3years ago but yes they never they still talk about it in that in and out it's it's kind of like me and that's not somewhere yeah yeah here I want to get to get back to Fannin
Speaker 4real quick I think the the most important stat with Fannin that I am going to be watching closely and maybe this changes a lot this year because of the way that the rosters change but um last year and this is the problem you have with a lot of path quote pass catching tight ends he only played 52 percent of three receiver sets so he was basically in there when they were doing two tight end sets all the time that was his main thing but then he only was in there about half the time when they were doing three receiver sets which is again still the the the most common receiver or the most common formation in the NFL and by the way he was a child he's 21 years old the Browns drafted two receivers in the draft also yeah but Todd Monken was I mean he was the
Speaker 1offensive coordinator for the Ravens but even before that Georgia he ran the Brock Bowers Darnell Moody Darnell Washington tight end sets like Todd Monken's a pretty big multiple tight end guy I see what you're saying though
Speaker 4well he's 21 he well he's not a real tight end it doesn't even matter how old he is he's not a real tight end he's a pass catcher he's a receiver he's a big receiver should we name that for people
Speaker 1which of these like when defenses look at them whether they actually classify it as too tight like Kyle Pitt I feel like the list is players that they're like not a real tight end aka can't block Bowers I actually think can block but I would say teams look at this entire tier actually that is what they have it's Harold Fannin Kyle Pitts and Sam Laporta are like yeah they're receivers Sam Laporta is a tight end but he sucks at blocking why is that relevant DK
Speaker 2like why for the person drafting why why should they care if he's a wide receiver or a tight end
Speaker 4because if he's only playing in half of the three receiver sets and again there's a lot that could change but he's just not on the field enough I mean like Pitts Warren McBride they all played 90 percent of three receiver sets last year which means they're just on the field all the time basically they are the tight end in their offense it's the Isaiah Likely problem it's basically how dare you is is Fannin gonna be the Isaiah Likely where you like love the talent he flashes every time he gets the ball he's awesome he makes big plays but he's only on the field 60 percent of the snaps or whatever it is um and look Njoku's gone so that's a good start but I don't think he's a real tight end it just depends on what Todd Monken is willing to do is he just gonna run out there with no tight
Speaker 1end so this is a perfect transition to the next tier because Dalton Kincaid the first guy in this next year is Dalton Kincaid for the Bills but to your point Craig about why does this matter I think that because the reason Dalton Kincaid gets drafted in real life in the first round by the Buffalo Bills or say you know all Kyle Pitts and the Falcons went before Jamar Chase what teams tell themselves is if we have a tight end that we can put out there and they match with the linebacker he can he's faster than the linebacker and so when in the passing game but then in the running we'll have an advantage no matter what and what and then you read that in the blurb you're like wait he's a receiver at tight end so that means he's like way better but what actually happens if you're not good enough is you just have the weaknesses of both things you're not fast they treat you like a receiver you're not a good enough blocker to make anyone pay but you're not good enough getting open to make the cornerbacks pay and so you kind of can't play and so it's your run game
Speaker 4yeah and so the coaches don't want to go out there with a guy who can't block exactly and that's where
Speaker 1the league's going so it's like guys who can block first then catch which is how you get Colston Loveland ends up being probably the best receiver in the league and so you're not good enough to play more value because he actually can I mean you know they have all the rookies upside at blockers even Tyler Warren can block a little um and so these guys who can't block kind of end up a little limited so this next year though I mean a lot of these guys are like that Dalton Kincaid is like that Travis Kelsey that's why he's kind of like slowed down as Travis Kelsey is not a blocker but he's not that fast anymore and this whole tier is Jake Ferguson for the Cowboys he's a real tight end Isaiah Likely for the Giants who's a classic example we're talking about he's a receiver Dallas Goddard for the Eagles and then George Kittle for the Niners who's like a classic the classic example of a receiver who's like a receiver who's like a receiver who's like a of a total tight end George Kittle feels low here that's the one thing I noticed about this tier
Speaker 4what I think George Kittle's too low I think he's gonna be a he's gonna freakishly outperform his injury for some reason I agree I just dropped I think we're all afraid that we're all afraid because he's coming off an Achilles tear which is a terrifying injury but I don't know I just feel like Kittle is probably going to be under value or he's he's he's worth more than this
Speaker 2spot right now makes me nervous he yeah I mean we have him ranked as the 14th tight end and you're going like outside the top 100 easily he tore his Achilles in week 12 he'll be 33 in October I would say history is not on your side right that's fair yeah was it week 12
Speaker 4it was late in the season I don't know it was even later was it in the playoffs oh it was in
Speaker 1the playoffs yeah he yes he got hurt and then he came back and he tore his Achilles in the Eagles in the wildcard round that which is you're right that's why it's a cause for concern I do have a question with injury recovery I know there's a lot of like Twitter doctors but um Stefania's the best and she was right she wrote this article at ESPN where basically Kittle had some pretty good comments about his recovery but it's within the context of of you know those kind of injuries it's like Zach Charbonnet tore his you know he shredded not Achilles but he shredded his ACL last playoffs and he didn't come back for a long time Kittle I don't think he's gonna play week one versus Australia it's like does he miss a game or does he miss a month he tore his Achilles
Speaker 2on January 11 2026 oh that's tough
Speaker 1but I I I it's weird we'll have to look into Kittle it's it's weird this whole tier is weird because it's yeah it's it's also it's also the first time there's old guys I mean I don't we haven't really hit this yet but like tight ends kind of been overtaken by Gen Z do you know the first the first person over 26 here is Travis Kelsey who's 10th wow is that right it's literally I mean if you just go through our rankings Brock Bowers is 23 Trey McBride's uh 26 Tyler Warren's 25 Harold Fanning's 21 Kyle Pitts in his fifth season's 25 and Laporte is 25 and then Dalt Cade's 26 and then you get to now it's Kelsey and Ferguson and all these older guys but this is once again I
Speaker 2think I I would be shocked if any of these guys was like a top three tight end but if I but if I
Speaker 1told you one of them was and they just had a great season and then one of them you know really like spark season had like 11 touchdowns who would you pick Greg who's your sleeper it's horrible I don't
Speaker 2know I I guess I'd pick Isaiah likely to be honest that's I don't Dalton Kincaid does not play Dalton Kincaid simply just doesn't play enough
Speaker 1he's a good example of the receiver thing is Kincaid like Kyle Pitts is a tight end who's actually a receiver but when you get injuries and they take away your top end athleticism then suddenly you're not able to beat all the other super athletic defenders but you can't block and so it's like how do we play you let me name some tight ends last year who played a higher
Speaker 2snap percentage than Dalton Kincaid Mitchell Evans Luke Musgrave Oh Elijah Higgins Musker Jeremy Rucker Elijah Higgins I'm shocked that Musgrave played more I guess Davis Allen Austin Hooper Daniel Bellinger I mean he was 54th in tight end snap percentage don't get you know what James Cook led the league in rushing
Speaker 1which is the point we're trying to make totally the bills running back left the league in rushing a
Speaker 2game didn't play it much to counter Dalton Kincaid was first in yards per run like he's efficient and I think he's good but he has a partially torn PCL that they're not going to fix with surgery that he's been battling through and even the way Billy Bean talks it sounds like he's injured or Brandon B not Billy Bean even the way Brandon B talks about him is like yeah we're gonna have to manage his workload but I hope he's healthy so it's like okay hate to hear that yeah that's I don't know about that uh Travis Kelsey uh you know I think you know Jake Ferguson is Kelsey can we do the
Speaker 1annual uh I don't know about that I don't know about that I don't know about that I don't know about that I'm outing you but one of you hasn't seen the league but there's a character in the league called Taco who doesn't do any research doesn't really watch football I know that guy's name shows up once a year once a year to the draft and just he would take Travis Kelsey everyone make fun of him and then he wins the league and it's like Kelsey's the guy where it's like oh yeah we got him 10th and you're like how DK where did he finish in total fantasy points last year like
Speaker 4second or third uh Kelsey was third in half PVR points total even though Mahomes tore his ACL and
Speaker 1month was with like Chris Oladukun and like the worst quarterbacks in years but like Hive it's to
Speaker 2your point how many points did he average per game nine not insignificant no it was not very it was what every other tight end averaged the guy I want to bring up here eight and nine Jawan Johnson averaged eight Dalton Schultz eight Jake Ferguson eight Hunter Henry eight Dalton Kincaid eight like
Speaker 4you can just close your eyes and pick one of these guys it's gonna average eight points
Speaker 1Isaiah likely is the guy to your point he's the best he's the most pop off the the page player especially like who's gonna lead the Giants and targets in September if Malik neighbors starts the season yeah unphysically unable to perform and misses the first month like it's not gonna be Calvin Austin it's not gonna be Darnell Moody it'd be Darius Slate and Isaiah likely it's a really talented players but why Mark Andrews ironically if it's not Isaiah likely I think it's Mark Andrews I think Mark Andrews is actually really undervalued for the Ravens and he's a perfect he hits he checks every box to me because people are sick of him people who just watched the playoffs were like oh that's the guy who drops the balls people have had him in this year sick of him but if you go back sick of him he had a lot of injuries in 2023 that ended his season and then 2024 he was recovering from the um what's the bad name that he had like that uh hip he had a bad kind of hip recovery but then he was in a car accident where he almost died like two weeks before the season and the Ravens kept that real hush hush so he didn't fall down rankings enough but he really lucky to survive that car accident and then last year Lamar was hurt the whole season and so I'm kind of like maybe he's lost a step but I but they gave him a contract extension I look at Mark Andrews he's only 30 over last year he's only 30 over last year he's only likely well that's the thing he's only 30 years old exactly they chose him over likely he's only 30 they have a new offensive coordinator they've never coached yeah 31 okay well all right well you're 31 too all right we're not going to put you out to pasture I'm 30 I know
Speaker 2Actually, I do agree with you. I have him written down here as a deeper... I think people are beyond sick of him. I think he's borderline irrelevant. They've given up. That show's still on? It's like when somebody's like, you still watching the morning show? It's like, that show's still going?
Speaker 4Wait, is that show still going?
Speaker 2Is that show still going? Yeah, morning show's still cooking.
Speaker 1Can I... It's something really embarrassing to you?
Speaker 6Yeah.
Speaker 1So the morning show... First of all, it's been on long enough. There were billboards for it when I still lived in Los Angeles pre-pandemic. And it just said, morning show, Apple TV, Jennifer Aniston, and... Oh, it was Reese Witherspoon, right? And I drove by it. It was on a billboard. So I'm driving. I'm not on my phone. I'm not Googling. I'm like, okay. I'm like, oh, that's so smart of Apple TV. They're going to have a morning show with those two women. That's so smart. Oh, you thought it was just like a real news program. I thought it was like the Today Show. I thought they were paying them a gajillion dollars. And I'm like, yeah, my mom's definitely going to watch Reese Witherspoon and Jennifer Aniston. That's so smart.
Speaker 2Talk about the news.
Speaker 1The whole first season happened. I had no idea it was a scripted television show.
Speaker 4He's a big Billy Crudup fan.
Speaker 2Yeah, Steve Carell. I think they had Matt Lauer and Steve Carell in that show. Oh, tough. But Mark Andrews, I'm kind of sitting here like, everybody's sick of this guy. They got rid of all their tight ends. It used to be like, oh, Mark Andrews is split. Isaiah Likely, gone. Charlie Kohler, gone. Patrick Ricard, gone. And it's like, they brought in Noah. They drafted the third and fourth round rookie wide receiver, Eli Surratt and Jacoby Lane. It's still Zay Flowers. Rashad Bateman, Devontae Walker. I'm kind of like, who's on this team? What if Lamar's good again? He might be pretty, this might not be bad.
Speaker 1I'm ready to be hurt again. There are, I think Mark Andrews, again, he's so cheap. And again, it's like, would you rather, you know, just where people are going. If you wanted to draft, let's just take Kyle Pitts because he's an easy punching bag. You know, in front of Kyle Pitts is like Jackson Dart or Blake Corum, Dak Prescott, Ramondre Stevenson. Like, there are real players going around him. You know what I mean? You know, Chris Godwin, if that's your flavor, I don't know about for me, but the players around Mark Andrews are like, now it's like Jordan Love, Wanda Robinson, Jordan Mason for the Vikings. Like, you know what I mean? Would you rather have Mark Andrews and, you know, Jackson Dart or like Jordan Love?
Speaker 4To go back to your question earlier, I think you asked if one of these guys ends up being a top three tight end and you're not going to be surprised about it. It's going to be Mark Andrews because he's done that before. Exactly. I'm going to be happy for everyone. I'm going to be happy for everyone who drafts him because I think it's logically a smart thing to do.
Speaker 1Yeah, I agree.
Speaker 4So I'm not going to do it.
Speaker 1So we like George Kittle, but we want to see how his rehab, we want to see how training camp goes. We need to see him running it on the field. Right. Yeah. And then let's not talk about Jake Ferguson. It's perfect. The next tier here, I'm going to read a bunch of names and I want each of us to pick up like one.
Speaker 2This is the last real tier.
Speaker 1Yeah. So it's Jawan Johnson for the Saints, Brenton Strange for the Jaguars, who had a good season, but now he's buried in the depth chart. T.J. Hawkinson, for the Vikings, Aranda Gadsden for the Chargers, who had a flash in the pan for a month, but he had a good rookie year. Hunter Henry for the Patriots, Chigokonkwo, who signed with the Commanders this offseason from the Titans, A.J. Barner, who is essential for the Seahawks down the stretches, Kenyon Sadiq, the first run pick out of Oregon for the Jets, Dalton Schultz for the Texans, and then Colby Parkinson and Terrence Ferguson for the Rams. That's a long list, but DK, I'm going to make you go first. You have to pick one sleeper from this group. And if I told you someone in this group ends up like a surprise top six tight end of the year and they were like essential draft pick, which one do you think it is? Who is the most upside? Because that's really all we care about.
Speaker 4Yeah, this is tough. I'm going to pick out a name that is, this is another one that's like, we're just sick of this guy and I'm sick of talking about him every year, but Chigokonkwo for the Commanders. Because again, there's a vacancy at the number two receiver spot for this team. Right now, it's Terry McLaurin and a handful of guys that we don't know who's going to step up. Traylon Burks, probably not. Antonio Williams, maybe, but he's a rookie and he's coming in and he's probably going to just be relegated to the slot. There's a small chance, maybe it's not, I mean, it's not nothing, that Chigokonkwo ends up second on the Commanders and targets and finally realizes his potential. This would not be the first guy who had to go to a new team to finally realize his potential at tight end.
Speaker 1Wait, can I tell you something? Do you know what I have at the top of my notes for Chigokonkwo? Don't talk about this guy. It's from two years ago. Do you know what I wrote? I put it at the top. Rocks for hands. Chigokonkwo cannot catch. I don't care how many targets he has, he cannot catch a football. Yeah. But you're right, though. But he is good. But he has the ball. I'm like, oh, look at that guy.
Speaker 2He can run after the catch? I don't know. I remember that one 70-yard touchdown he had and I was like, whoa.
Speaker 4He's so good. He did sign for a surprising amount of money. I'm going to pull it up. I don't have it off.
Speaker 2He's never had more than three touchdowns in a season.
Speaker 1Well, neither did Trey McBride before last year. That's true. I think that you're right. He checks a few of the boxes you want for a huge breakout, which is definitely an athlete. No one questions the ability. He can't catch. And Jaden Daniels is great. Washington doesn't have players behind McLaurin. You also said upside.
Speaker 4No receiving on that team. You also said upside. And I thought, he's a guy that actually has upside. If you're looking for a floor play, I think Dalton Schultz is maybe the guy in this range. I feel like we kind of look at floor play. He had over 100 targets last year.
Speaker 2Who fucking drafts? Who's looking for a floor play? Pick 180.
Speaker 4I don't know. Well, maybe you didn't draft a tight end before that.
Speaker 2Yes, I guess if you truly need someone. Oh, please. But he'll be on waivers.
Speaker 4If you need seven points a game, draft Dalton Schultz.
Speaker 1Who's your, Craig, if I told you someone in this group exploded, who is it?
Speaker 2It's funny. I think there's more options in this tier than the one above it that has more huge upside potential. I think I would take A.J. Barner on the Seahawks, who could be the second or third pass catcher on this team. I mean, it's basically, it's JSN. And then behind it, it's Rashid Shahid and Cooper. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And whatever you want to think of those two or how they're used in the offense. I'm like, A.J. Barner, 500 yards, six touchdowns last year. He had 50 yards and a touchdown in the Super Bowl. And the new offensive coordinator, Brian Fleury, was the tight ends coach on the Niners for the last four years with George Kittle. I think Barner played a little bit more than I thought when I looked at it. 77% of snaps last year. 12th in routes run per drop back. Played a lot more than Arroyo. And Barner's a good blocker. So I think like he can be on the field. I mean, he was definitely, I've seen as a guy who could do both block and catch. And so I'm like, I don't know. This is an offense that might feature the tight end more. The offensive coordinator makes sense. He can be on the field a lot because he can block. And he's been a guy that they like in the red zone. And he catches a lot of touchdowns.
Speaker 4He's pretty good, man. I think I love everything you said about that. The only concern is really that Arroyo breaks out and they try to use him more. Because he was hurt most of his rookie year, I believe.
Speaker 1I think Arroyo is, again, he's another crazy athlete receiver who just plays tight end. And if he doesn't work out-
Speaker 4He's not really a tight end, yeah.
Speaker 1Yeah, but that's kind of what we saw with Tucker Craft and the Packers. The Packers took Luke Musgrave, who how many sports did he play in college? Like seven or whatever? Luke Musgrave?
Speaker 4Oh yeah, he was like the former skier.
Speaker 1He was like the craziest athlete at tight end. And they took him in the second round. Packers took Tucker Craft in the third round. And you know what? Tucker Craft can actually block and play tight end. So he plays and Luke Musgrave doesn't fucking play. So A.J. Barner has that. I would say there's one guy here that leaps off the page to me and is probably my biggest sleeper in the season. He's kind of like the twin to Mark Andrews. But Mark Andrews is like wins on grit and hustle and this person's actually athletic. T.J. Hawkinson for the Vikings. I think he reminds me of-
Speaker 4The forgotten man, yeah.
Speaker 1I re-listened to the episode we did at the end of the season where we were doing memento tattoos. And we were like, what's the Jonathan Taylor lesson? And Craig said, anyone who's ever been like the best person at their position and is not 30 yet, we should think about, that's T.J. Hawkinson.
Speaker 2I think I said it is not 27, but that's fine.
Speaker 1I was stretching it for my own purposes. Craig, don't go check what you actually said. Hawkinson's 29. He's a first round pick. D.K., is T.J. Hawkinson athletic? Yeah. He was. But he had an ACL injury and then he had a late ACL injury and he talked about how the next season coming into it, it really affected his season. And then coming into last year, I liked him as a sleeper, but then what we didn't foresee is how bad J.J. McCarthy was and the Vikings offense was a mess. And I think that T.J. Hawkinson's been lost in the wash of no one really knows how to put that in context. I don't think it's hard to foresee a situation where considering he's going like, he's like a 14th round pick, where, oh, this guy who was once a top two tight end, now that his knee is healthy and his quarterback is no longer J.J. McCarthy, is like back and being a top eight guy. And I think I'd rather have T.J. Hawkinson, I don't think he's a top 200 pick right now. He's going on waivers after your draft. And at that rate, that is what makes me rethink drafting Harold Fannin or Kyle Pitts or Sam Laporta. I'm like, yeah, I don't know. I agree with that.
Speaker 2He's the second guy on this list of me behind Barner of like guys who I think could pop. Contract year also for T.J. Hawkinson. And the question is like, it's the Kyler Murray question where on one hand, you're like way better than J.J. McCarthy. And on the other hand, you're like Trey McBride. I'll say the stat again, seven touchdowns in 39 games with Kyler Murray, 10 touchdowns in 12 games with Jacoby Brissett. That doesn't mean McBride still wasn't great and was getting a lot of targets. So it's obviously still a huge upgrade. So I agree. I mean, if you're this late in the draft, like this guy's proven it definitely worth a dart throw. There's a lot going on. It's like you have Jefferson, you have Juwan Jennings, you have Jordan Addison.
Speaker 1There's a lot of people there. Yeah. But he's also, but he's literally free. I guess that's what I'm saying. Someone who three or four years ago was the second tight end is free. Okay. So the other people want to mention is the Rams tight ends, Colby Parkinson and Terrence Ferguson, because so Pukunuku is like the third pick. He might be the first pick in some drafts. And then Devonta Adams goes 30th or so. Or 40th, whatever. Yeah. The next Rams players pack. catchers drafted or under there are no other ones drafted it's just like the running backs it's kyle williams and blake quorum no one else is being drafted and so it's like the two tight rims tight colby parkinson i think everyone's like well regression blah blah blah he had nine touchdowns he won't do that again he's gonna just do it again that's the guy this year he's gonna have exactly as many touchdowns this year as he did last year and then terence ferguson's gonna get better too but i think they're gonna both play all the time i have no earthly idea what week you should play them or whatever i think they'll be this year's version of across the season they'll have really good years godspeed on when to play them but i think they're both talented and it will they will be the third and fourth receivers the rams and if anything happens to puka or davante they're gonna be like weekly plays and they're also free but that's that's it so what that says good i like that they're great with that said i want to get a hot quarterback rankings and emails but with having just gone through these tears craig do you think how do you feel from what you said at the start of the show if do you want an elite tight end are you willing to what would you do in your draft if you had to draft right now at tight end i'm i
Speaker 2think i am more likely to go after a top two maybe one of the the tier two guys i like but i think bowers mcbride and a warren loveland craft i think i'm really going to go after that this year or wait till the very end but i i'm more likely to get an elite tight end this year than i think
Speaker 4i have been in years past dk yeah i'm in the exact same boat i think i like that i am just
Speaker 2never does that like i used to never draft gronk travis kelsey i don't know why i didn't like reaching on tight end i do feel like this year i don't know why i didn't like reaching on tight end last year i like bowers and mcbride more than typical years you have potential to have a really
Speaker 4strong uh advantage at your tight end spot it's there's just a yeah it's just so flat after i like
Speaker 1i like bowers i agree with what you guys are saying the flip side is i do think that just the overall youth at the position creates some level of chaos and i just think there are so many i mean again the youth of all these guys i just think there are more tight ends that are viable than there have been not just because there's more tight ends on the field but when we're talking about all these guys who entered the league in the last three seasons i don't know
Speaker 2to me a lot of guys are gonna score eight points but that's true that's probably true yeah well
Speaker 1then i don't know about what do we always say about a tight end that's actually elite super bad it's like having two it's like having two cocks yeah uh we have some we have i wanted i have a hockey meal here but first we have to get to something very important the hot quarterback rankings cannot wait they're here voted on by the seven yes for those who don't know someone asked me what's the seven and i'm like right maybe everyone was we have seven female listeners so we call seven we asked all seven of the women who listened to the show to rank
Speaker 4quarterbacks and they did all seven hundreds of hundreds of them actually responded hundreds of
Speaker 1the seven wrote in and gave us rankings yeah so we actually averaged and way more scientifically than you would ever think actually averaged all these rankings from um uh the all these rankings all seven women who sent us rankings and we last week did the honorable mention so at the top of every week we're going to reveal the next four so today we're going to reveal the beginning of these rankings so we're going to do 13 14 15 and 16 here for the sexy are we doing sexy 16 or no sweet 16 you guys don't why don't you like sexy 16 what is wrong with sexy 16 i don't i don't feel
Speaker 2strongly either i'm not going to push into it it's fine it's fine we're doing the top 16 wait can you remind people who the honorable mentions were 20 to 16 i of course i'm not going to push
Speaker 1of course i can so the honorable mentions the people who did not that just missed the cut in no particular order daniel jones bonix kyler murray sam darnold drake may who uh one comment always looks 12 jared goff fernando mendoza and kirk cousins were uh honorable mentions wait you
Speaker 4named so many there we didn't talk about that many last time no we only did four i was talking
Speaker 2about who the four honorable you named like eight well then i'll go fuck myself okay those are the people who didn't make it he snuck a few in there who are the four who are the first four out who's
Speaker 1drake may who are the first four out who's drake may who are the first four out who's drake may goff and mendoza and cousins it's like the tight ends man some of these things are close and i'll score eight points yeah please okay the middle is squishy so start with 16 okay so this can i get a drum roll it's the 16th hottest quarterback of the 2026 nfl season as voted on by all seven of the women who listen to the ring of fantasy football show is jackson dart quarterback for the new york 16 16 this is shocking i
Speaker 4have a theory uh i'll tell you what i know what your theory is and you're right so much higher
Speaker 2uh well i have two theories one are people gonna say he's a douche or the trump thing both yes
Speaker 1people the he definitely suffered uh you know political alignment has taken a disproportionate uh impact women buy nikes too guys yeah look we're playing for all 50 states i i liberals by nikes women parameters on how they should judge hotness yeah and i definitely will say vibes are a part of it and also yeah and a lot it was very fresh in the minds and a lot of people were upset about that but i i have a bunch of comments here about jackson dart i will admit there was a there were a lot of threes and layups i actually will i'm not going to pull out a lot of data for this sexy contest but i am going to pull it out for jackson dart i want to add my my second theory other than
Speaker 2the trump thing and like the vibes there i also think he's just not that famous and i think that helps a lot like i think guys like joe burrow who like every time he's on the show he's like everyone knows helps and i think there's probably a lot of people who are like this guy like barely played who even is he now he's not that hot but i think fame adds two points to your heart that's
Speaker 1true i don't i can't prove that that's true there is another thing can you think of another reason
Speaker 4that he was i think he's got too much shit on his head he's too many accessories i it's that's
Speaker 2that's one of those old man thing you've ever said take that shit off your head necklace he's got
Speaker 1shit all over his face well it's funny i think i said that because the other thing that dragged people the other reason people had him really low was uh he just looks young and a lot of people that are like it seemed like everyone 29 and older was like that looks like a child he looks like a high schooler um but so dart had the biggest standard deviation of any quarterback he had that's really the that's really funny he's the only quarterback that had more than 50 top 10 votes that had more than 30 bottom 10 votes okay can we say where did you guys have him i had a nice oh i'd have to pull it up i'd have to pull it up i'd have to pull it up i put him 15th can you just look where i had him i think i don't have the high fits had him fifth i think so we were kind of like you did you did have him fifth no no no that's what i'm looking at oh yeah you did fifth yeah i mean i think he's really i mean he's he's a good looking man so let
Speaker 6me can i read you some of the anonymous quotes a little fan bias there what did you have that's
Speaker 1his quarterback that's my quarterback yeah well you're wrong uh can i read you some of the comments with the seven according to this craig's too high on him these are the comments the uh the all seven of our women listeners wrote about jackson dart uh these are all anonymous quotes the nfl's hottest fuck boy yeah looks like he banged looks like he banged my best friend's mom yeah zach wilson corollary seems like a 1980s teen movie villain yeah for sure yep uh him and bo nicks would crush it we haven't brought up the fact he has a mullet yet but as a mullet stereotypically jock probably shoves someone into a locker in high school oh big time yeah nerds and then so to the mullet nerd nerds political activity this one i thought was so funny someone said political activity aside not every guy can look good in a curly mullet dart rocks it and he looks a bit like a yassified matthew stafford okay i don't know how to say that word out loud but it's like you know like people write like yeah like y-a-s-s-s-s yeah yassified i don't know how to say that yassified
Speaker 2i don't say that word a whole lot um yeah look i i think what jackson dart lacks in traditional attractive qualities he makes up for in kind of just like confidence yes he has he's an incredibly
Speaker 4confident he's got swag or whatever what is it uh riz as the kids i feel like it's like
Speaker 2if he's like talking to you at a bar you kind of you kind of could be into it you could be like
Speaker 4you know what this guy's kind of got an energy to him he's tall and really muscular so well
Speaker 1there's that these guys are but yeah no no they're not all tall craig true all the tall ones are in the top 16 so that's my biggest theory i have seen the rankings the full rankings you have not i think height would really change this if we just held the faces to the heights i think a lot of these
Speaker 4would change if you're having to look at them in the eyes a couple other quotes that i thought were
Speaker 1really funny about jackson dart has a dozen red flags and he's proud of all of them uh that's good jackson dart uh so someone said i know it wasn't his choice but someone who spells jackson with an x
Speaker 4cannot be i was gonna ask i was gonna ask if the x makes a difference here
Speaker 1uh someone said what app jackson dart would absolutely ruin my life complimentary
Speaker 2that's perfect girls love a bad boy like one night in a bar you're like you know what let's
Speaker 4fucking go for it i'm not here i'm not here for i'm here for a good time not a long time yeah
Speaker 1is that but yeah so yeah i think hot if you're jimsy so that's 16.
Speaker 4okay uh jackson dart the quotes delivered on that one number 15 do i can i make you guys guess
Speaker 1who do you think is next baker and i'm gonna tell you i bet you won't get it right so with that said can you guess sam darnold no he was already out oh was he out uh jordan love no 15 this person's
Speaker 2ahead of jackson dart so you think this person doesn't deserve it aaron rogers tyler shuck
Speaker 1tyler shuck is really on this list - No. - I don't think they even know that he's like six foot five. - I had Shuck, why? - Tyler Shuck. This is why we did it, boys, because men don't know what women want. Men don't know. And Tyler Shuck might have Shuck 9.
Speaker 2DK might know what women want. DK had Jackson Dart 15th, and the 7 had him 16th. DK had Tyler Shuck 9th.
Speaker 4Wow. I think he's traditionally attractive, and he's tall. He's tall. I don't know if they know that, though.
Speaker 2I would not describe him as traditionally attractive.
Speaker 4You would? I don't know. He's got like a square jawed hair.
Speaker 2I think that he's rich. He has hair. They're rich compared to the other guys. Well, they're all rich.
Speaker 1Come on. Can I read you some of the quotes the 7 wrote in about Tyler Shuck? Wow.
Speaker 4He has kind eyes, Craig. Yeah.
Speaker 1First of all, someone just wrote in about Tyler Shuck, which is so perfect for the photos. Also, if you're listening on Spotify, you can hit video and watch the video of this. Or on Netflix. Put us on Netflix. This is a great segment for Netflix. Someone wrote in and just said, Tyler Shuck, smile more. Smile for me, baby. Which I thought was great. Come on. Someone said, Tyler Shuck, wonder bread looking ass.
Speaker 4Yeah. Now, this picture is good.
Speaker 2Like Jason Segel in Forgetting Sarah Marshall, like dating Kristen Bell. I'm like, Gynormo, get out of the shot.
Speaker 1I think he's like a great hold the purse for your girlfriend guy. Yes. Someone said, I'm sure I've seen this guy on The Bachelor before. Yeah.
Speaker 4Oh, 100%. He's on the whole Bachelor rotation. All the different shows. He's really kind. He's really kind.
Speaker 2And we'll like take photos of his girlfriend. He'll take like 40 versions of the same photo for his girlfriend on Instagram.
Speaker 1And their shoes aren't in any of them. And she's mad about that. Yeah. Someone said, Tyler Shuck, if he wasn't a quarterback, he'd be pulling groupies as the cute front man for a pop punk band at a warehouse party. Definitely. I'm glad. Okay. Someone said, I hate that I find Tyler Shuck attractive. Frat boy in a bad way, but I can't quit him. Wow. Oh. Someone said, sinister frat boy energy. Sinister.
Speaker 2Really? Oh, I don't kiss a sinister energy.
Speaker 3I was going to say, he looks kind of wholesome to me. I agree.
Speaker 2I think he looks. Yeah.
Speaker 1Sinister is such a great word. Someone wrote, I wish he was my math tutor. Oh, geez. And then something I have to ask you guys about that I just is a total blind spot.
Speaker 2This is a nice photo of him. The one we're looking at. He's. Yeah. Okay.
Speaker 1Someone wrote, Tyler Shuck, pretty cute. Points off for being an adult blonde man. Ah. I got to tell you, I didn't know that that was a thing. It's a thing. Can you please tell me about this?
Speaker 3Is it a red flag to be a blonde?
Speaker 2Not like, because I was blonde as a child.
Speaker 3Even I was really blonde as a child.
Speaker 2It's kind of like an unserious hair color for an adult man.
Speaker 3Is that the idea? That's really good. That's so funny. I never thought about that.
Speaker 1You were a blonde child? I was a very blonde. Yeah, I was. Yeah, I was dirty. Yeah, I was actually dirty blonde. Wow. Probably not as blonde. You were blonde. You were really blonde.
Speaker 4I mean, DK, your son is very blonde. Calvin still has blonde hair. Yeah.
Speaker 2Yeah.
Speaker 4He might be guilty of this when he's an adult and has blonde hair.
Speaker 2I think I might be getting a little too overwhelmed. Like, he's 15th on this list. This is still, like, kind of middle average, I would say.
Speaker 1He's not 6th. But average starting quarterback. Someone also said, my wife had to Google image him, this man's a blank sheet of printer paper.
Speaker 2Yeah.
Speaker 1And then the funniest comment was someone just, who wrote long sentences for other quarterbacks, then just wrote, Tyler Shuck, dash, forgettable. Okay. Which was mean. Who's 14?
Speaker 2Who's 14?
Speaker 114. I think this is where I'm going to actually hold my line and say the seven are wrong. Okay. 14. I think it's Jaden Daniels for the Washington Commanders. I think that this is the first real misstep from the seven.
Speaker 2I have him 13, so I'm right on here.
Speaker 1Oh, interesting. Okay. I had him four.
Speaker 2Really? I think he's a good-looking man.
Speaker 3Look at that smile. He's a good-looking man.
Speaker 1I don't know. Tall.
Speaker 3So someone wrote. What do I know?
Speaker 4That's why we consulted the seven.
Speaker 1The comments on Jaden Daniels, beautiful smile, charisma out the ass, clear skin, could stand to gain a few pounds, but that's between him and God. He's a little skinny.
Speaker 4He's a little skinny.
Speaker 1And then someone wrote, he has style confidence. He has cool, effortless demeanor, long lean, fantastic angular bone structure, million-watt smile. I prefer my men a little thick, but Jaden looks great. It's surprising he's only 14, considering some of these compliments. Someone else wrote, I'd smoke a joint with Jaden Daniels, but I wouldn't fuck him.
Speaker 4He does have like that saying, how do you say it? Song Freud. He's. He's just cool under pressure.
Speaker 2He's another guy whose confidence to me elevates his.
Speaker 1Yes, I thought someone nailed this and they just wrote. Oh, I'm sorry. I don't have the exact company. They basically wrote Jaden Daniels has not played in enough games yet for people to realize how hot he was or how he is, which I think is accurate because he had the rookie year and then he missed a lot of time.
Speaker 4Also, I will say, I think some of the some of this is like something that will probably happen with all these guys. But like, it depends on the first picture you see of him. I think there's like an anchoring effect. Yeah, because I must have pulled up one where he was smiling. He has a great smile. Incredible smile. So maybe that was the anchoring effect for him for me.
Speaker 1And can I can I throw out one other thing about Jaden Daniels where the same thing that the height would affect it? There is one thing that would dock him quite a bit that I think if women knew this. Well, what Brandon Ayoub did last week was out of bounds. I will. It is a known thing that Jaden Daniels, his mom is always there. His mom is always like within 30 feet of where they're Jaden Daniels. If he has a game, he's out of whatever. I think I think at some point that might become grading.
Speaker 6The mama's boy situation.
Speaker 1Yeah, I think that that's that's it's I think that that might impact the the hotness rating that he is any social event. He's at the World Cup. He's at whatever. His mom's always there with him.
Speaker 4Yeah. Loving your mom is good, but having her around all the time, not good.
Speaker 1I'm just saying that if it would, it would impact the ratings. People do that.
Speaker 2I love I'm having so much fun with this. I truly have no idea what to expect. He's number 14. Also, all these women, women also notice things I'd never think about.
Speaker 1Someone wrote Jaden Daniels knows how to do his hair right for his face shape. Oh, interesting. I just I'm still working on that myself.
Speaker 2We all are. Sure.
Speaker 4So for the record, we had Jaden Daniels seventh as a composite ranking.
Speaker 1I think I think I'm going to try to fight the women on this one, but I think that one I think I'm going to stick with. OK, the next one, 13th on the the quarterback hot rankings, man, I got no idea.
Speaker 6Where this is.
Speaker 1I think this is Brock Purdy for the Niners.
Speaker 4Oh, that's kind of shocking to me. I had him 32nd.
Speaker 2Why? Because he's like a child.
Speaker 4He looks like he's 12.
Speaker 2I don't know. I had him 10th. Ten. That's wild.
Speaker 1How is that so different?
Speaker 2I think he's a little cutie cutie or cutie patootie.
Speaker 1I think that's a little bop him on the nose.
Speaker 2A sweet little cute guy that you meet in high school and he's really nice and. You know, he's quietly really athletic and strong, but he's like the nice, cute guy in gym class that you run into.
Speaker 1DK, why do you have him? 30 years, probably 30.
Speaker 4I just think he he's he doesn't have a look. He just doesn't look like anything. He's the guy you don't notice in the store. That's exactly what someone wrote to us.
Speaker 1I literally I actually went back and found that email for that woman who emailed us, who works in a Lululemon and Brock Purdy came in and none of them knew he was the quarterback for quite a while.
Speaker 4I just don't I think relative to the. Rest of the guys on this list, he's not noticeable. I mean, I'm not saying he's I don't think he's out of control.
Speaker 130 seconds crazy out of 36 or 40 or what? What? I assume it's not out of 32, 32. He has only four.
Speaker 2Yeah, he has four guys after so pretty out of 36 was hotness rankings.
Speaker 1I don't find him hot. I know. So, DK, it represents something that I also like solid when he does the dance.
Speaker 4I'm like, stop doing that.
Speaker 3This is an age thing as well. When he does like, you know, he does.
Speaker 4Greg, what is it, the gritty or what? Hits it the white. No, no, not the gritty. The Doug Craig.
Speaker 1You got to see what's going on here. One DK hates the 49ers to DK is 12.
Speaker 4That's all that he's doing before. The fact he's wearing a 49ers uniform.
Speaker 1And he kind of hits the doggy.
Speaker 4But no, it's an age thing. I think he looks like a little kid doing it. I'm like, please stop doing that.
Speaker 1A lot of women wrote in and I could tell some people's ages because some people had a giant bucket of like Purdy was bucketed in a lot with Drake May and Kim Ward as young guys, they just would kind of like literally. Yeah. And I think that for people of a certain age, there's a point where they look so young.
Speaker 2We have a 38 year old woman voting here. The kid who looks 20, I get it.
Speaker 1Maybe not. Yeah. So can I read you some of the comments the seven had about Brock Purdy? Sure. Uh, Brock Purdy looks like he wears khakis in his free time.
Speaker 3Yes. Yeah.
Speaker 1Brock Purdy, sweet little Disney Channel original movie quarterback. Exactly.
Speaker 4Um, derogatory and complimentary apparently. I don't know.
Speaker 1Brock Purdy, the friend zone tier. These guys would be fun to hang out with, but would never ever date. Like we can go mini golfing or high five each other.
Speaker 3See, I feel like this is more close to what I was saying. Maybe I was a little harsh.
Speaker 1No Brock Purdy, cute like a puppy or like a kid playing T-ball kid playing T-ball. Someone just wrote Brock Purdy. You little scamp.
Speaker 4Yeah. Well, I do. I do call him a sneaky little shit. Um, and, and that's my most, that's the strongest compliment you can get from me.
Speaker 1Uh, someone just accurately wrote Brock Purdy somehow 26 and not 19, but he cannot grow a lick of facial hair or even stubble has almost no shot at escaping the ranks of the inoffensively cute, which keeps him as just kind of a guy.
Speaker 2Yeah.
Speaker 4I can't believe he's this high.
Speaker 2What? 13th. I think this is right. I think this is the right range.
Speaker 1So one woman put him first and said, he's Mr. Relevant to me. Is this his wife? Is he married?
Speaker 2Girlfriend? If Brock Purdy was in your friend group is he might immediately become the hottest guy in your friend group.
Speaker 4Of course. course so yeah can i and also like he is way more athletic than he looks like yes yeah i think and you know he has the confidence of being the final pick of the draft and he's been awesome he got the big time deal makes 50 million i get it i get it i probably docked him a lot because
Speaker 1like 6-1-2-20 did you guys meet my friend brian at my wedding i don't know if you did he he kind of reminds me of brock purdy because when you meet him you wouldn't expect him to be like a psycho murder competitor like just an absolute gamer but like like he just looks like he's like a very normal looking consultant but then like he i've seen him make half court shots during games because people said he couldn't like craig like craig like it kind of like craig and i'm like you
Speaker 4wouldn't expect that i'm like you know all right i'm being a hater can i can i reach you 30 seconds
Speaker 1fucking that's wild well he just hates the niners dude come on look it's the one team i am allowed to hate all right dude one other comment someone said brock purdy adorable but probably asked permission to hold hands adorable okay so run through 16 through 13 again 13 is brock purdy jayden or sorry yeah 16th is jackson dart 15th is tyler shuck jayden daniels is 14 and brock purdy is 13 so that is 13 to 16
Speaker 2on the top 16 fascinating i'm having a blast with this it's unbelievable you want you want
Speaker 1some analytics on this uh sure well the the real analytic takeover the way rather is that jackson dart was just in a lot of top fives and bottom fives which i think says something about uh modern dating yeah but i think jackson dart's the
Speaker 4most surprising one on here to me maybe well a third of women had brock purdy in their top 10
Speaker 1but only wow uh five percent of women had him in their bottom 10
Speaker 4yeah all right he's safe seahawks fans probably represent
Speaker 2it's you and mina have him in the bottom five question we might get meat on this show she's
Speaker 4so angry oh yeah i want to hear where she has him mina's dude where do you where would you rent kyle shanahan do you think kyle shanahan's hot i feel like he's probably next year we'll
Speaker 1do coaches yeah next year we were 1000 doing coaches a hundred percent we're doing coaches yeah uh yeah women listening please start sharpening your ranking your coach rankings now we're gonna do next year absolutely okay so we're gonna do these at the top of every week right craig so next week we're gonna have 12 to 9 um and yeah so we'll do those at the top of each
Speaker 4week through i gotta say the seven have delivered this seven above and beyond yeah thank you for
Speaker 1this uh okay can i read you i'll read you one email we'll get out of here yeah let's do it these are just i love that we're just like doing hockey history i had to go back to wayne gretzky for a second gordie howe wayne gretzky love it so first of all the oilers won
Speaker 2the gretzky trade
Speaker 1that's that's you know what yeah you're probably right actually it is crazy that they traded away wayne gretzky for money and then won another stanley cup and the kings never won so this is this email is from brendan be bone i'm not gonna read the whole thing all right but i his his breakfast is low-fat greek yogurt with dried cranberries roasted sunflower seeds and almonds with a cup of black coffee oh that sounds good oh you're an almond person hyphens i didn't realize
Speaker 7that you say almond almond yeah almond there's an l in there almond the almond brothers almond yeah there's an l i've never said that in my life almond almond bro almonds it's so new york almond i know people who say almonds say
Speaker 2pillow instead of pillow usually pillow yeah that's good oh hyphens is pillow where are you
Speaker 1pillow pillow like or like milk you know milk almonds almond uh no what almonds is that an accent or is the l silent i need to know now oh if the l isn't silent but i there are people who say almond what about like what what about like in church p-s-a-l-m psalm you pronounce the l yeah yeah psalm maybe it's
Speaker 7new york psalm psalm psalm psalm almond you say psalm psalm i'm jewish i don't fucking know that's
Speaker 1yeah psalms that's yeah psalms
Speaker 4almond anyway wayne gritsky when you start saying it when you start saying it how it should be said though it does kind of make you sound like dave chapelle impersonating a white person
Speaker 1almond psalms psalms listen here now yeah uh okay wayne gritsky there's just a bunch of other stats about how good wayne gritsky was yeah because uh brandon felt we didn't fully understand i mean we probably don't we definitely don't well i this one
Speaker 2don't know this one went a long way is the worst at this this one went a long way why am i the
Speaker 4worst because you're saying they lost the trade well well the kings lost objectively what's the
Speaker 2what's the point of of playing sports to win a ring fair so wayne gritsky played like 20 seasons
Speaker 1if you look at if you just took the last 20 mvps in hockey like the last 20 seasons if you just took the mvp from each of those seasons uh wayne gritsky had more points in his 20 seasons than those mvps combined wow literally that's his last his entire career was better than the last 20 best person in hockey
Speaker 2that's crazy so he's literally basically he's just the mvp every single year statistically
Speaker 1average to them be better than that craig he's better than the mvp every single year superior to the mvp uh great wayne gritsky i mean more multi-point games than games with no points at all uh this one is other if you other than one player wayne gritsky scored 2 000 points faster than every nhl player scored 1200 points wow the only person in the middle is mario lemieux but other than mario lemieux gritsky got to 2000 faster than anane wells got to 1200 he was basically
Speaker 2working twice as fast as everybody else in the history yes hockey which similarly wayne gritsky
Speaker 1is obviously the fastest player to a thousand points in hockey but he the second fastest to a thousand points is also wayne gritsky going from one thousand to two thousand wow jerry asked
Speaker 2jerry rice ass stats uh maybe the kings i don't know anything did the kings just not do a good job building around him or did they just like lose in the playoffs they didn't have any i wish
Speaker 1someone had done a documentary on this that we could like dive into that would be that would
Speaker 2be helpful i why did the kings fail him they must have did something they must have so wayne gritsky
Speaker 1was the only player to ever have 200 points in a season and he did it four times jerry rice yeah so there's a lot yeah great he's pretty good the jerry rice where it's like so much
Speaker 4it's it's you know exponentially better than but even like second best player i want someone to
Speaker 1explain to me why wayne gritsky was so good jerry west just start jerry this is what i was talking about also at the forefront of like you know the west coast offense and it was part of that he was it was also like bill walsh and everything happening around the niners so i want someone to explain to me how wayne gritsky was this much better than everybody else who's ever lived i don't understand why because i didn't realize that he's not actually that big yeah he's like
Speaker 4six foot six one yeah well that was the thing he was small it was like a it was a problem it's like
Speaker 2a messy situation kind of can i get a can i get it wayne gritsky was a problem cut up i'd love to
Speaker 1see that oh my god did you see darren peterson the the the second pick in the draft at kansas you went to the jazz and they're like yeah yeah so like the coaches told me on defense they want me to watch this this football player this old football player like he's on the ravens he's on the ravens i remember his name they're like ray lewis he's like no um he eventually got there and i think ed reed and i need someone to make a cut up of that into just ed reed highlights over like some 2000s rap song uh that was humbling but also actually that is how we should play defense and then i started watching ed reed videos but yeah should we have a wayne gretzky is a problem video or should we have an
Speaker 4ed reed i want to see wayne gretzky was a problem wayne gretzky was a problem i'm fascinated by the wayne gretzky's of sports it's just insane like hyphen said how is he so much better well
Speaker 1now that we don't know hurling you know what the other sport we can have people email in i think hurling now that we've gone there i do you guys disagree the sport we understand the least is cricket yeah so if someone wants to tell us about cricket i would also hear about the wayne gretzky cricket someone wants to explain that yeah uh okay thank you dk thank you craig thank you cam thank you austin thank you nikhil thank you carlos thank you boo thank you everyone for listening thank you to the seven all seven of you for sending your rankings uh we're also next episode dk we're gonna do movie club we're gonna do transformers you have to watch it and we're gonna do the transformers review okay and so i'll take notes
Speaker 2we're gonna do it thank you lord lord millennial bangers continues today i will be offering you we're going back a little earlier at 2006 vintage this is the 20-year anniversary of a song called every time we touch by cascada fuck out you dog who look let me tell you something about i don't know that off the top of my head sailor toss it on spotify i'm so upset every time we work at spotify and we can't play the songs i'm
Speaker 1tone deaf so i think that i am transformate i'm gonna transform the product every time we touch i get this feeling yeah i mean yeah i feel alive
Speaker 2yeah yeah it's something like that i here's the thing about cascada this song came out in 06 i don't i don't know who cascades it is no never heard of that i don't know if it's a person or a band i think it's a blonde woman pseudonym yeah i it's funny that this song was so good and was such a banger and is the ultimate headbang song from this from this era it's fucking just rips you can't help but get sucked into it
Speaker 4i don't know who this person is they it's a dance music trio from germany i thought it was i thought it was a blonde lady that's crazy every time we touch is a song by german dance trio cascada or cascada or whatever there's a high level of song that you're a dance there's a level of song i dare you to like and you will run through a wall i mean i'm sure i know it i'm sure i recognize it
Speaker 2some songs a breathy female voice going i still hear your voice and you're like oh let's go let's go it's so good they also have one other song called evacuate the dance floor from 2000 oh i know that song also fucking good yeah that song i'm very aware trying to remember wonder evacuate the dance floor stop this beat is killing me
Speaker 1that was a big song that one i know but the other one was bigger the other like every time we touch was truly huge i mean i definitely know the other one but the
Speaker 4the evacuate the dance floor means more i'm surprised you don't know
Speaker 1every time we touch because you were still you know living life six
Speaker 2thick of it were you traveling europe at this time i was this wasn't in your underground probably
Speaker 4heard it in that in the krakow like uh dance club that i was in at the time you're in ruins bars
Speaker 2hungary can you play the chorus to yourself so you familiarize yourself with this i need you to hear the chorus yeah you need to play okay hold on go to like go to like second 22 start there but for the record it is a blonde woman perhaps is the lead of this yes group i don't know who it is though who is this woman who is she who is she cascada natalie horler nat nat she's only 44 right now all right i'm hearing it i can i definitely know this song
Speaker 6i'm aware of this song get ready dk's head's gonna start oh no i i'm already i i i'm i'm
Speaker 4there craig i definitely recognize this yeah yeah it they don't do them like that we're not
Speaker 2doing that anymore we're not making songs like that right you know what i mean it's simple yeah look this the beat is killing her it's too good do you have a specific memory of this song craig uh every time we touch yeah we used to do um we used to do a thing in high school called lip sync oh yeah yeah where like each each class puts on like a 10 minute lip sync performance lip sync battle like 500 people and you do like it's like little like skits one minute skits um and this was one of them um it's just one of those songs that like no one talks about and every time it comes on people are like fuck yeah this song no one would ever be like oh my top 10 song every time we touch and the second it comes on everybody knows it jumping up and down sweaty in a bar it's great
Speaker 4craig in 2010 i'm seeing this from wikipedia in 2010 and again in 2014 cascada's music was second most popular song in the world and it's one of the most popular songs in the world and downloaded in the dance category only after David Guetta, who I think you did last week. I mean, he solved racism, so I mean, that's no
Speaker 1harm there. Second's an honor. Anyway, shouts out Cascada
Speaker 2and Natalie Horler. Shout out Nat. She really fucking did it in the aughts. She did it. Good for her.
Speaker 4Good for them. Cascada, it's Spanish for waterfall, apparently, according to what I'm reading here.
Speaker 1That's one of those where it's probably Cascada in a different language, but it's Cascada. It's gotta
Speaker 4be Cascada. You can say it however you want. I'm fine with that. Almond. We'll be back next
Speaker 2episode with another Millennial Banger. I got a couple in the holster I'm excited to get into.
Speaker 1Goodbye, everyone. We'll be right back. We'll be right back.
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