Tay Lautner: The Realities of Pregnancy

what is up daddy gang it is your founding father alex cooper with call her tay lotner welcome to call her daddy thank you we both just start crying no no guys we just got in the room together and like the pregnancy hormones we both were like i feel so safe yeah i know that if one of us has to pee during this yeah because right now i last um the time i was in my doctor she was like oh girl like that baby is right on your bladder and i was like perfect yeah so it's a safe space perfect whatever you i will let you know i realized last time we were together you and your husband came on you guys were newlyweds and matt and i weren't even married that's kind of crazy and now we're pregnant we were like in like completely different stages of life right yeah and now look at us i remember when you announced and i was obviously pregnant for you and taylor and my first thought was oh my god i'm so happy for them and then my second thought was oh my god are our kids gonna be like friends at the lake together okay that's i can't see she's crying no literally oh stop i know they're gonna be like little in the little life little vest jacket thing okay yep okay next point keep going so i just was like oh my god so for anyone that doesn't know tay and i have lake houses like right basically next to each other and i just couldn't help but think like oh my god it's gonna be great so summer you're gonna be by the lake talk to me about what an ideal lake day looks like for you as my pregnant friend oh my gosh i mean i'm i feel like i'm kind of turning into more of a lake girl than a beach girl 100 like i'm really enjoying the lake i honestly think like a really nice i love a sprite so either like a crisp little sprite with lime or like a cutie little mocktail my mocktail game i have been thriving i said the other day to someone i was like i just miss a spicy margarita and they're like you can make it without the alcohol alex and i was like you're so right what a thought on the rim like no taylor just made it's a lychee mocktail i don't know he looked it up but it's literally like a lychee soda thing like soda water and then it's pineapple concentrate and frozen pineapples with a tahini rim i also and i don't know about you i've been like loving not drinking yeah i've been like loving not drinking i've been like loving not drinking i will say though being around people that are drinking i'm a little bit more like okay this is gonna remind me never to drink again in my life yeah the tolerance is like to be around the whole thing okay if you're by the lake is taylor cooking are you cooking like who's the chef oh taylor's definitely cooking honestly taylor there's hot dogs on the grill because i've hot dog has been my new hot dogs and hamburgers the hamburgers yeah okay what are some like random cravings you've been having recently yeah i think i've been having a lot of cravings lately i think the most recent one has been girl scout cookies because i just got girl scout cookies and what kind i can't even the samoa is the one with the peanut butter thing in them any girl scout cookie is gonna hit right where we need it yeah another thing that matt said and i thought it was so cute is when i told him that you guys were pregnant he was like oh my god i feel like me and taylor are really gonna bond because i feel like we're both gonna be really good with kids and activities and i was like why are they so giving like camp counselor like taylor's out there and i'm like oh my god i feel like we're both gonna be really good with kids and activities they're getting the boat yeah like i feel like literally that's gonna be the vibe they i feel like they will will completely thrive in that what kind of dad do you think taylor is gonna be we always say he's gonna be the parent that gives the kids what they want like i say no and he says yes really yeah so i'm really curious to see like how that plays out if that actually happens that's actually interesting because matt and i've talked about that and i'm like i think in the younger years i'm gonna say yes and matt's gonna say no but then the minute they get into like socializing in terms of like middle school to high school yeah i'm gonna be the one that's like psychologically analyzing like you're not going to the party because of this and then matt's i'm like i don't care do whatever you want yeah so we'll it will flip at one point yeah but for now you think you're gonna be a little bit more i think so okay yeah i think so why do i also feel like taylor is going to teach my child how to do a backflip probably let's start with a cartwheel i know okay tell me everything like when you found out what was your reaction um yeah so we it was honestly special because so i guess before like rewinding to finding out i was pregnant um we weren't trying i mean we weren't doing anything to like prevent it and had it honestly for a while and i was just like you know i wasn't at the place where i was like i'm ready i wasn't tracking my ovulation anything like that um and i have pcos which is now pmos but pcos um and so my periods have been irregular for a long time so my cycle before I got pregnant was 40 days long so like I literally went 40 days without a period and then this next one happened and I was on day maybe like 36 so I wasn't technically like late and I wasn't really feeling anything uh like weird uh but I had a microneedling appointment and you can't do that if you're pregnant you cannot and I was just like let me just take a test just to be sure I was like I'm not gonna tell Taylor I'm not gonna like because I had a pregnancy scare last January like I fully thought I was pregnant and like cried to Taylor after a podcast taping I was like holding it in for like two weeks I was like if I don't get my period by this date then I'm telling Taylor and we had to go to CVS I ended up not being pregnant but that showed me that the next morning I woke up and I wasn't pregnant I was like oh I'm actually like sad that I'm not pregnant I think I'm ready took me a whole year fast forward to the following January um but anyways I didn't tell him and he like went to go he's the chef so he went to the butcher shop to go pick up meats for dinner and I took the test while he was gone pee on the stick I go do my whole like skincare routine of like the face like just like very in-depth like everything I don't I like forget that the test is there like I'm not thinking about it because I don't think I'm pregnant but I'm like let me just make sure right because we got our microneedling yeah there can always be a chance um and it said pregnant and I was like no I literally like froze for like five seconds and I was like okay and then I Google the can you have a false positive and it basically was like no and I was like okay so I took another one and then it also said pregnant this whole time Taylor's gone I'm not texting him because I'm not gonna text him and tell him and so I'm just like standing there just kind of in shock and like obviously excited because I know that's we're married and that's what we want so but I'm literally just like frozen and he gets home I literally he brings like the groceries in I throw everything in the fridge and I just pull the test out and hand it to him and he's just standing there and he's like what is this and I was like uh-huh he goes how did this happen and I was like okay well you know how that happened I know wait how did this happen you're like how do you think it happened Taylor like well this one day um so we didn't get to experience finding out together which like after the fact you know telling him it was like we still got to like celebrate and have like you know four days of us just kind of like being in shock and being like okay like we're doing this so when it came to the gender reveal I was so excited to get to like do that together and it truly was like the most like the most fun thing to get to do I love going to gender reveal parties but I literally could never like have one for me that pressure is just like okay so how did you do it so we literally just looked online on the test we got the test we actually had it for probably like probably like a week when you didn't look we why the minute the minute I got mine I was like I want to know I think it was just because like I don't I don't even know I feel like we were both kind of just like not scared but we were just like oh my gosh like it was just gonna make it so much more real that's so true I think um but uh finding out and like seeing girl on there it was Taylor really wants girls like he's like girl dad he wants all girls I was kind of I didn't really care um but it was like truly the sweetest moment ever like it was like the most like the coolest thing I think we're ever gonna get to do obviously when I birthed the baby that's gonna be very special and probably even more special but it's the coolest thing it makes me emo when you're talking about this because I agree with you there's something so nerve-wracking when you're going to find out the sex and I was similar to you I found out without Matt and so I was in the bathroom same thing like took the test like wasn't really sure didn't think it was gonna end then when it happened I had that same thing where you're like it's a little bit of mix of shock yeah and I think it doesn't take it takes a second to like set in yeah um but the. but the gender makes it so real and I cannot believe you sat on that for a week when I tell you my doctor was like somewhere that there wasn't good service and she's like Alex I tried to call you to talk because I told her like just call me yeah and she's like I I feel bad like I don't want to just text it to you and I was like text it and she's like no Alex like she's like texting back like no no I can call you in about 20 I was like text it like no do it I was like and so I'm laying there and I remember I got the document yeah and I'm like okay breathe breathe breathe breathe click on the document I see the sex and Matt's in a meeting And I text Matt and I'm like, come home. And he's like, I've got a couple more meetings. And I was like, do you want to know the gender of your baby? And he calls me immediately. And he's like, what? I'm in the middle of a meeting. There's like 20 people in the room. And I was like, do you want to know the gender? You better get in the car. He leaves the meeting racing home because I was like, I'm not telling you over text. So the fact that you guys got to be together, that's so, oh, my God, I'm so happy for you. That's really exciting. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. After you and Taylor found out about the pregnancy, who did you tell first? We told first we told two of our couple best friends. We were actually going on a birthday trip for Taylor. And I was like very much in first trimester trenches. So we kind of had to tell them we were also going somewhere where there was like wine. So like that. And I wouldn't be drinking. So we kind of had to tell them. But I also did want to tell them because I've walked through miscarriage with like multiple of my friends in both sides of like not knowing they were pregnant and them having to tell me that they lost they were pregnant and lost the baby. And then the other side of finding out they were pregnant and then them like getting to like have that together and then them having to tell me so after kind of like walking through those both. Taylor and I decided I was like, I need to just tell like a couple of my close friends because God forbid, like, you know, anything does happen. I don't want to have to deliver like the happy and sad news at the same time. So we were going to tell them anyways. But that's who we told first. Isn't that so it's so crazy, just the emotional aspect. And I think everyone has to do it at their own time. I think it's so crazy when people are like, you can't you should not tell people before the X amount mark. And it's like I think. It's so crazy. It's so crazy. It's so crazy. It's so crazy. I think it's so crazy. It's so crazy. It's so crazy. It's so crazy. It's so crazy. It's so crazy. like three to five okay yeah was there any consideration of naming your child taylor it may be in the mix we will find out when the baby comes it's also just like so much pressure naming a human like this is like the name of this human's gonna have for the rest of their life and there's like so much public like conversation already around it for you guys it's like no i feel like if i don't name my baby taylor the internet's literally gonna cancel me i'm gonna get like you had the perfect opportunity but i'm like guys are they really gonna want that name i think you get a little confusing because it's already confusing right like do we have taylor and then we have tay tay jr baby we used to always joke that if we were having a boy we'd name him taylor and call him tj i'm so stressed for you guys honestly in that we'll see um what did it feel like finally announcing and sharing your pregnancy to the world because friends is one thing girl yeah and then hitting upload on that talk to me it was truly like a weight lifted off my shoulders i think i was just so stressed someone was gonna like leak it honestly i think i was a little scarred from our wedding because our like first look someone was like photographed us having our first look no and like i didn't know that yeah and it came out like the day after the wedding and it was like that was the first time i'd ever experienced a baby and i was like oh my god i'm so stressed i'm so stressed i'm so stressed i've never experienced obviously you know paparazzi and stuff has followed us around before but that was the first time it was really something that was so intimate i'm so sorry so personal so that was like that was not fun for me um so i think that kind of was like understand it right it was making me nervous like every time i go see my ob like i you know taylor has come with me to every appointment and i'm like there's obviously like girls my age in the office and so i'm so happy that you were able to control the narrative and do it that way because i agree with you like you have having an experience that is it's an invasion of privacy right that was like a moment between the two of you that you and also a first look like yeah it's not even like a shot into like the the after party it's like your first look between the two of you so pregnancy and that oh my god i'm i'm so happy that it didn't get leaked for you um let's talk about the first because i don't know about you but no one could have prepared me no and there's like almost give me one word to describe your first trimester that's horrific trauma literally just hell at anything bad tough yeah one symptom i know you have talked about on your podcast is your nausea and i also had i don't even like to talk about it almost because yeah um that nausea was so traumatizing truly like it felt hard to live my life while experiencing that um can you talk to me a little bit about how it impacted your day-to-day and just overall the first trimester oh yeah i think that and i honestly feel like since i've been pregnant i've kind of been shitting on pregnancy but i think that's just because i had such a skewed view of pregnancy from what i saw online like i just feel like it's supposed to be what i what i saw and what i was going to be you know this most beautiful thing and i'm going to be glowing and i'm going to feel the best i've ever felt and be so confident and blah blah blah like all that i have not felt any of those things and it took me a while to like feel comfortable to say that but i really think because the internet is just so quick to be like oh you're not grateful you're pregnant do you know how many women would like kill to be pregnant and i completely understand that but i think two things can be true like obviously i'm so grateful and excited to be having this baby with like my favorite human in the world but i don't like what it's doing to my body like it's not an enjoyable experience i feel like in my life i've seen so many women obviously be pregnant right and you see them on the street you have friends you have family but nothing prepares you and now i look at pregnancy so differently like when i see a woman on the street now i'm like i need to do something for her immediately no truly it just changes your perspective and i agree with you there's so many hardships that you have to go through and there's so many hardships that you come with it um and it feels weird to talk about i agree because of how many women struggle to even get pregnant so to be pregnant there's like this pressure to just shut up and be grateful yeah um talking about the nausea because i i also was like i don't know how women work in their first trimester no i'm like can the mat leave needs to be there needs to be like a first mat leave and then maybe there's like three months where you can do stuff in the middle and then the mat and leave needs to like yeah because it's like hard to do anything no my my best friend is a labor and delivery nurse and i like i mean i couldn't imagine still like working in the hospital having my nursing job doing this and i'm like she's like my my best friend's literally holding like women's legs up as they're pushing a baby and she worked until like maybe like two weeks before she gave birth she is and i'm just like but the whole time she was in her first trimester she was dying in the hospital and like she's throwing up in between like seeing her patients and i'm like how how does this work you um you talked about because yes there's the nausea but then there's the hunger you shared that you would wake up starving in the middle of the night what meals were you able to have during your first trimester and then what were you also like repulsed by yeah i feel like there was a good three weeks where i had like food aversions to literally just everything and all i could eat was carbs it was just like crackers a grilled cheese toast and watermelon was my that was like the refreshing like i needed cold i also never drink ice water but my first trimester like i just i just like pour a glass of water i've never been like i need ice i was like so much ice everywhere i would even chew on ice at times i was like this shit slaps so hard no i lived in my migraine cat it was just like i just was not you're you're not present like you're literally just trying to get like through the day and then it's like you can't even think about the next day what pregnancy symptoms have surprised you skin tags the little things i have like a couple on my neck but they're like tiny like you can't see them but i can feel them i feel one like i was feeling one on my side today and i'm like what is that good to know no that's apparently something they are supposed to go away after that one it's just like so many your nipples changing so early on i was not expecting my boobs i'm like no i'm i'm a double d and there's no milk in me yet and i'm really scared thank you to clavio for sponsoring today's segment so one of the most incredible parts of my job has been watching the community that has formed first from call her daddy and then expanding the unwell world pretty early on i started thinking okay how do we actually get everyone together like physically in a space and that is why when we started unwell the media company one of the first things that I knew we wanted to build out was our live events business basically that would be a way to bring this community together in real life and create experiences that people could be a part of we want people to walk through those doors of one of our unwell live events and we want them to feel like they have been transported somewhere completely different we have red carpets photo moments creators you love merch free products once the event is ready to announce that is when basically we have to reach the daddy gang and let everyone know this is what's happening and you can be a part of it and this is where a partner like Klaviyo has been so important for us as a company at unwell the size of this community has grown beyond what just like let's say a traditional email list or a manual outreach could ever handle and so we needed a way to make sure that everyone has the opportunity to know when an event is happening Klaviyo has also helped us just build an email marketing system that allows us to communicate with this incredible community at scale so no one feels left out and everyone has the opportunity to be a part of the next unwell event and so many people which is one of my favorite parts come to our unwell events alone knowing that they will meet like-minded other women when they arrived one of my favorite examples shout-out is the Boston daddy gang these women met through one of our live events they created a group chat and to this day there's a group of women who are still friends from meeting at an unwell event and they have gone on group trips together even which I love so much but I could not do this without my incredible team at unwell and partners like Klaviyo who help us scale these experiences right to reach more people thank you to my team at unwell and thank you to Klaviyo for helping us make these moments possible and I will say this is just the beginning as call her daddy continues to grow staying connected to the daddy gang will always be one of the most important parts of what we do you can build more personalized valuable customer relationships with Klaviyo you on your podcast were open about well you have always been open about your own mental health struggles and then recently you kind of alluded to this low moment that you experienced during your first trimester are you comfortable kind of sharing a little bit more about that moment yeah I'm kind of like on a mission to talk about this more because I obviously share so much about my mental health and everything I've walked through and having PTSD and depression and everything I've gone through that and when I talked about this and I honestly didn't even like really share much it was the most like dms and messages from women I've ever received in my like entire time doing the internet like truly it was so crazy how many women really feel that same way and I think it's because we're not expecting our bodies to change as quickly especially for me so like first trimester I have emetophobia and I hate throwing up like I have a fear of throwing up so every time I would get nauseous I would eat so I never threw up in my first trimester but every time I was not just I would eat and so I gained like 12 to 15 pounds in like three weeks maybe and so nothing fit so early on and I was just felt just like I I mean I cried I was like literally standing naked in front of the mirror I think I was like about to get in the shower and Taylor was in the bathroom with me and I literally just like started crying so you just don't recognize yourself and I think we don't talk about this because we're not supposed to talk about the first trimester because you're not supposed to talk about it till you know everything is safe and fine but then you kind of have amnesia and forget that that even happened because you're just to have the pregnancy brain and you're thinking about the future but I mean it's it continues to happen to me even now like now that I fully like have a bump it feels better which sounds like funny but I think for so long it was just kind of like fluff and I just like could not recognize my body like it was just everything thank you for sharing that because I agree with you that like again no one I don't my whole algorithm I feel like right now is pregnancy and there's so much that is so beautiful that I'm seeing but I'm also like oh my god like I I'm not seeing any of the more honest shit that I'm talking about with my girlfriends who have had children or are pregnant right now and that reality of looking yourself in the mirror and being like honestly like scared of it I don't know I don't know I don't know I don't know I'm scared because you're like and I'm not saying you're thinking again like I'm prefacing it because it's like we're grateful but it's like I'm not saying that you're not saying like oh my god I don't want to be pregnant yeah but you have that feeling where you're like what did I do like this is so scary like what is happening to me and you're so it's you're so out of control of your body and you really are out of control it with your emotions and like mental health and everything that's going on and it's hard like my husband's been amazing it sounds like Taylor's been so amazing but there's also only so much that like a man and also just someone who's not in your body can do for you yeah like how has he been supportive during this time yeah no I mean you know Taylor he's literally just like the nicest human and is so it's been it's honestly been so cool to walk through this time together because I'm I think similar to you like we are both like very independent people and even even my therapist is like you should rely on Taylor more but I'm like I'm just like only child I'm like hard working I'm like very driven I'm like no like I if I can do it I'm gonna do it like I don't want to even if you know I should have Taylor do it I'm gonna do it so it really made me because I I just could not I I couldn't move for a while it really made me have to rely on him to do stuff for me and it was the first time like obviously you know he we have a great partnership but I just I just do things on my own and it was really special to get to do that with him it was sweet it is beautiful to like watch your partnership evolve in a way that you could have never anticipated because you didn't know you were going to be laid up and like down bad and then all of a sudden you're looking at him in a different light it really makes you just so appreciate the partner that you choose in it oh my god I think that's like the one of the biggest things I would scream and Kylie Kelsey talked about this on her podcast and I heard it like sometime last year and she was just like your husband is the only person in your family you choose like you don't choose your siblings you don't choose your parents you don't choose your kids like you choose who you're gonna marry and I always say like when I married Taylor I married him because I know he's gonna be great with kids and I know like he's gonna be like that's like I see that right I want to talk about this a little bit more because something I was thinking about is and I saw a woman post about this I think on TikTok and it made me just have an aha moment where it was like she basically said I have never had more people comment on my body so freely than when you're pregnant and it's either like oh you're carrying well or like oh my gosh don't worry like I gained 20 pounds in my first trimester so you're like so are you calling me fat like yeah oh you're oh your face doesn't look as like there's such a commentary that people feel so comfortable oh the bump is this or that and you're like wait and so it it's such an odd feeling where everyone feels entitled to kind of comment on how a woman is carrying yeah and it's very strange not that we don't already do that to non-pregnant women but it feels heightened when you are pregnant and so um I want to talk about I know you were just kind of like alluding to like you know when you were looking in the mirror and everything but like did you have any experience like when you were pregnant with your like had expectations of your body and your pregnancy that ended up going very differently and like what are some examples of that for you oh yeah everything I didn't think I was I mean I've already gained 35 pounds so I'm like I didn't think I was gonna gain that much weight which I don't even I think also just because my mom she was one of those people that you could not even tell she was pregnant and had a great pregnancy and just like from the back she was just like I wear dresses she wore when she was pregnant with me like not pregnant like in before pregnancy you're comparing yeah no there's I think there's so much comparison and I still do it now I mean obviously I have a better relationship with it because the more I've been open and talking about it the more I feel better about it but still like I just was not I wasn't expecting to like almost not even fit in Taylor's jeans like it's just it's yeah it's just a really interesting thing my girlfriend and I were just talking about she's also pregnant I'm so thankful I have a few girlfriends that are pregnant and were like right around the same time and so it's been really special to like be able to like text each other like how we're feeling can we eat this like is does anyone have this happening yet so I'm so thankful for it but she was telling me how she which is something me and our other friend are both experienced of people telling her like oh my gosh I knew you're like when like after she announced oh my gosh I knew you were pregnant and like she's like oh like how and they're like I could just tell like and not get in like just commenting that she'd gained weight so it's like okay so you're you're telling me that you thought I like look fat yeah and it was just like so many people and I've the more I've talked about this with some of my girlfriends the more it actually like really does because when you start to tell people your clothes are snug on you So it's just like, why are we like, give another like, give another example. Like I thought me and my girlfriend, Natasha, we both we both knew had a feeling the other was pregnant because of the symptoms we were having. We would hang out and we were both just like, but like not telling the other one yet. Or like it was just very similar vibes of what we were doing or we were texting about bloating, but we hadn't told each other we were pregnant. So we're like, give an example of like, don't just say I just had a feeling like you looked you looked pregnant. I also I'm kind of struggling with the glowing thing. I feel better with it now. But when someone's like, you're glowing, I'm like, no, I just have gained 30 pounds and my face is fuller. No, no, no. Thank you. But glowing because I'm like, I know my skin doesn't look great. She does not look like I woke up this morning and I was like, I think there's like five pounds of makeup on this one just giant situation. At the right here. And I'm like, I know it's not. I'm actually physically glowing. Yeah. So explain to me what you mean by that. Yeah. What do you mean by glowing? Why? Let's get into that. No, that's such a good point. And it's it is so crazy because I also understand to anyone that's watching that isn't pregnant is like, oh, my God, you're you're probably thinking like and maybe I don't know. I've never I've never made a comment about a woman's like pregnant body before. But I'm looking back before I experienced pregnancy. I don't think I had an appreciation for the amount that a woman is going through with her body. And so I now look at those comments as a pregnant woman. And before I would have been like, oh, she just said you're glowing like it's like. Yeah. But now I'm like, no, no, no, no, no. What you don't understand about a woman who's pregnant is like everything is in turmoil in her head and in her body. And so for you to say anything about her physical appearance, it's just even if you say like she's looking great and she's not feeling great. Yeah. Just shut up. Yeah. But it's hard for people to not comment. I feel like it's kind of like, you know, people don't really know what to say if someone's grieving, if there's been a loss or something. I honestly feel like there's some similarity of if you haven't walked through it. I also have been getting really stressed out when people are like, it's going to go by so fast. Enjoy every moment because I had a full blown panic attack the night before our wedding because so many people like had told me they're like tomorrow's going to go by so quick it's going to be over. And I was like. I was so panicked because I was like, I don't want it to go by like I wanted to I want to remember all of these moments. And so when people have been telling me that I'm like, like I told I think it was probably like a couple of months ago, I like I now have like I'm normally a very chill. It takes a lot to make me mad. I'm like so even keel, like nothing pisses me off. And now the hormones, I'm like, I'm done. But you're like, goodbye. I snapped a tailor for the first time last week and I felt so bad. Over what? Literally nothing. It's just it's no, literally, we were leaving my obese office and I hadn't had enough food, I think was partially the problem and he's just like, so sweet. He drops me off and I run in and like grab the food and then I run back out to the car because it's a busy street. Don't worry, everyone. He would get that. He would be getting the food if it wasn't a busy street. So I run in and grab it and then I run back out and the door is locked and he rolls the window down and I'm like standing there trying to open the door and he's like, you're going to need to grab utensils. I was like, I did. And I was like, my God. I got in the car and I was like, oh my gosh. And he was like, for the rest of the ride, I'm your chauffeur. We're not going to talk in five minutes. Go by. I was like, I'm sorry. Wait. Also, I love that. That's your version of snapping at him. I did. No. I'm not. I'm like, so I'm the most you guys, Taylor and I have never like been in an argue. Like we don't like, I'm just like, it was just like talk through things. It takes a lot to piss me off. You gave him the demon eyes. I know I did. He in it. Like, I think it's like he was like, I am your Uber today. He made a shocked face. I was singing. I was singing about that too. I know. And I remember when I interviewed you guys, Taylor has publicly talked about his own body image struggles. Has he been able, I know it's not comparable, but like, has he been able at all to talk to you and, and relate with you in any capacity that's been helpful in that realm? Yeah, no, I think there's definitely a level of relatability there, even though it is something that's completely different. Um, but it is something that I've struggled with, you know, posting my body. Publicly or like how I go about that, but it's really sweet. I was talking about laying out at the lake and I was saying how I'm just, I, I said something along the lines of like, I'm just going to be a big pregnant lady laying out there and he goes, no, you're just a pregnant lady. And I was like, oh, that's really nice. I was like, I need to talk to myself that way more. I think that's honestly the biggest thing. And that's something I keep trying to tell myself and every time I don't, I just like smack myself on the wrist. But. I think that's the biggest thing. So I always like think about all the time where I talk about like Taylor and I will be like, which parent do you think they're going to be like annoyed at more? Who's going to like do that? Like we always just talk about that. So I feel like it's good to kind of like I've always been like thinking about it, being aware. But I mean, I think I think I'm just excited, really excited to be a parent. I mean, I've always wanted to be a mom growing up. I'm an only child. So growing up, I was like, I want to be a mom. I want five kids. I don't want five kids anymore. Now, honestly, once I went through nursing school and I watched a vaginal birth, I was like, I literally went home and I told Taylor, I was like, we're not having children until I forget what that looks like. Because this is the only angle I ever want to see. The receiving end is like as a 22 year old, I think I was in school, like seeing that, like I was like, I was like, oh, my gosh. No, no, no. It's eye opening. You're like, I didn't need to see that. I want to live it. Yeah. And like just like pretend. Yeah. But I want to see it. Yeah. I feel like I agree with you that as you get closer. Like you start to for me, I've also started to think about like, what did my parents get right? Yeah. That I want to emulate. And then what are things that I want to do differently? Like, is there anything from you and Taylor's childhoods that you guys are like, oh, we really loved how our parents did that? Or like, oh, we want to like try to like change it up on this angle. Yeah. I mean, I think just putting our kids and as many like sports activities as possible. I was just talking with my mom because I both my parents worked like my whole life. And so I. I went to after school daycare for that until like I was in high school, junior high and Taylor didn't have. Well, I mean, granted, he also started working. We just had very different childhoods. Come on. He was busy. So he wasn't going to after school daycare. But my mom was talking about it. She was like, you know, obviously we were working, but also we didn't want to just put you home with a babysitter because you were like you're an only child. So you had exposure to playing with kids and having all those interactions. And I did like every sport under the sun. And I think that's something that we really like want to just introduce our kids to like everything. And I completely agree with you. I also think with the rise of like technology for kids, I have never felt more adamant of like we need to put our kids in sports because I think there was so much that it taught me. Like, even if you're not good at the sport, like there's community and there's resilience and grit and determination and like just there's so much that a kid is taught through that experience. That I feel like I am very grateful to look back on the amount that my parents, but it's also a sacrifice from the parents. Right. Like I remember parents that I grew up with would be like, oh, my God, why do you have your kids in that sport? That means you have to like travel for it or that means you have to like you can't go away for the whole summer. And my mom was like, well, my kid loves it. And there were certain parents that were like, no, no, we wouldn't do that. Like we want to go to the beach house or like we want to go to the beach for the summer. And that means kids don't have a summer sport. And I took. To each their own. But I think that's where I want to knowing how much my parents invested in us as kids to do what we loved. I feel so fortunate that I'm like, I want to be there on that sideline with the cooler cheering like a psychopath. So on the other day I had like packed. I don't even remember what it was for. Oh, golfing. I had like packed a bag with like all of my snacks and stuff for Taylor and a friend we were with was like he was like, you're going to be such a great soccer mom. And I was like, oh, that's like the best couple that I've ever had. Truly. Like, thank you. It's so special. We played the game who's more likely to when you and Taylor came on the show. And now I want to play parenting edition. And you're going to either say mom, Taylor or dad, Taylor. Who is more likely to be down to go? All out for a family Halloween costume. Dad, Taylor. Do you think you could ever convince Taylor to do a family twilight costume? It's a good question. I mean, honestly, if I would, I probably. Oh, my gosh. We would just would not. We wouldn't post it. It would be like a I could convince him to do it in private for sure. And share with our close friends. Honestly, I love you're like, let me know when you do. I'm like, let me know. OK, who is more likely to be more calm during delivery? Oh, I would say me, Momtay, because I'm very calm in high stress situations. But also I could see it being the complete opposite. And Taylor just really like calming me. I was like, we had to like figure out like some breathing. Like I have to he has to figure out how to like, how do you figure there? I have so many questions. There's so much to go. Like, how do we practice that? Like, how does how is he equipped? I don't know. I'm also picturing Taylor to anyone that doesn't know this. And I remember when we were at the lake and we were talking and I literally pointed this out and he was like, oh, my God, you remembered it. Taylor has this tendency to stretch when he's like, what do you say? Like, not anxious, but like, just like it's like he's thinking it's either when he's nervous or he's like thinking because I had put him on the spot to tell you about his show. And he then just like spread. I can't tell you. That's actually one of my favorite moments to ever exist. Like, it's so sweet that you even remembered that. And when you were like, oh, my God, he's doing it. And I was like, wait, he actually is doing it. It was like the first time I ever interviewed you guys. It was like after the interview, basically, Taylor was like or Tay, you were like, he like does this thing when he gets a little anxious that he like stretches like a year later. I see you guys again. And I'm like watching this man stretch like on deck. And I'm like, you're stretching right now. And his leg was up on me. Like ledge. And I'm like, Taylor Lautner, put your leg down and calm down. And he literally was like, how did you notice that? And how did you remember that? And I'm like, well, first of all, your groin is up. Yeah. Groin up. Leg is up. He's so funny. Why can I see him doing that in delivery room? He's like stretching out. He's going to have to like paint. Oh, my gosh. I'll let you know if that happens. That would be so funny. OK. Who is more likely to spoil the kids? Oh, dad, Taylor. OK. Who is more likely to do it? Document every milestone. Mom. Cute. Yeah. Who is more likely to be the first person to volunteer to change a diaper? Oh, mom. I've changed diapers before. So I think that I have a leg up. Who's more likely to cheer the loudest at your kids activities? Dad, Taylor. Is there a specific sport or activity you guys like really want them to try? I mean, I obviously want to put them in dance because that was like my main thing. But also, Taylor was telling me because he's, do you know that he's like a world champion martial artist? Of course, I do. That's why I said he's going to teach my kid to do a backflip. So I like forget that was a thing. But he was like, we could put our kids in martial arts. And then I was like them and like the little white. So, yeah, probably running around in her little outfit. Now, all of all of my girlfriends are like, we're putting our kids like because they're all they're all going to be so close in age. So we're just going to like put them in the little sports and soccer, too. I think that was I did soccer for like that was I had. I did both at the same time. And then I had to pick one. So I picked dance. But I think just like seeing them like run around. Seeing your child at a martial arts class with Taylor Lautner. Oh, my God. And then one day them like doing by. Yeah. Who is more likely to splurge on unnecessary things? Like, are you buying a lot right now? Mom? Yes and no. Because everyone's like, just don't don't stress because you're going to. Honestly, I haven't had one person told me like to buy. Every everyone's been like, you're going to use a quarter of the stuff you actually have. It's actually weird because I feel like I'm such I'm so type a planner. But with this, I've been so like not doing research and not like doing stuff. I finally went into BabyList and like, if you haven't got it, it's like actually getting to like see a stroller because like, I don't know where to start. And I'm reading this stuff online. I'm like, this is so confusing. I don't know what I want. Right. And also, like, there's that. And then also, like, I'm having I'm fully prepared. I'm preparing to like, I'm going to try to breastfeed, but I'm fully like, I'm going into it thinking that this may not work because everyone may not work. So I'm having formula just like ready. So I'm prepping for both. I love that you just said that because from what I've understood, and obviously we're not there yet, but everyone talks about how there is this enormous pressure to breastfeed. And I have had friends who are like the nurse that I was working with even pressured me when I was like, it just doesn't feel right. And they're like, you have to do it. You have to do it for six months. And I just feel so passionate of not even being there yet, but knowing that you need to do whatever your body is telling you to do. That's where I think it's like, why do we do that to women? It's like, we're already going to be going through so much postpartum that to then put that pressure and like shame on a woman of like, I've had friends that are like, oh, I would like go to mom groups. And they're like, oh, are you breastfeeding? And they're like, no. And they're like, oh, yeah, that that pisses. It makes me so mad because it's like it's. Also, I was talking with someone about this recently. It's like you your baby will benefit from a mom who is present and mentally well in the head. And if breastfeeding is it has is having a negative effect on your mental health, then you need to listen to your body. Then you got. Yeah. Marriage in terms of bringing a child into this world. I think there's a lot of changes that a relationship can go through. Have you and Taylor just talked about? the impact on your marriage of like, okay, we're bringing this baby into the world. how are we going to still prioritize ourselves like what do you think yeah no i definitely think that's something we're trying to implement because that's been a really big thing that a lot of my friends have told me is like you're like people say like say goodbye to your marriage say goodbye to whatever and i'm like no like actually like taylor and i've been together for eight and a half years like i've i like hanging out with just him like we do everything together so that's something that we're definitely preparing for i think too we're also just talking about it more like we have good communication but i definitely just like hold things i'm like a pusher downer with things and it's actually funny because before i got pregnant i was telling my therapist that i want to get better bringing things up when i'm even it's weird because i'll bring things up if i'm struggling mentally with something but if it's something that i want to like something that taylor and i need to talk about or something that like something deeper i really struggle with like bringing it up i don't know why like i didn't come from my family it's like you're not going to be able to do it if you don't have a partner you're not going to be able to do it conflict so i think that's why but he was like my therapist was like this is a muscle and you can work through this and like we're going to start working on it and now with the pregnancy hormones i'm like great this is like i just gonna like say whatever's on my mind because i feel like more like i just i don't have as much patience or i'm just like i feel i don't think i feel more confident saying it but i'm like there's less of the like me being scared to say it so i feel like we're having a lot of just like we're just talking openly about what things will look like and we're having like we're just talking so much more and i think it's bringing us even closer before the baby comes which is going to be special and i want my kids to like see see a marriage that is like a healthy marriage and see like i'd see you know my parents are high school sweethearts too so like it's cool like i want them to see a marriage that it's the husband and wife like and the kids like it's not just us not together and i was just giving everything to the kids it's not just us not together and i was just giving everything to the kids it's not just such a good point like it's almost like that's why parenting is so crazy because when you are young and you have or you're having a young child in your head people understandably could be like we need to pour into this kid and then you can lose sight of your partner right yeah but then the kid grows up and is like i didn't really have an example of love in my household it was like my parents were very present but like they were a little disconnected and so it's like everything affects the child at different stages of life and so you're so right like seeing love in a home especially when this kid is high school college out of college searching for a life partner yeah like you talking about your parents i feel so fortunate i have a similar situation they weren't high school sweethearts but they're still together they're so in love and i know that's a rarity and i hold on to that and cherish that and i matt and i talk about that all the time that we're so fortunate to have both of our parents still together but with that comes a lot of fucking work and a lot of communication and i think that's a really important thing to and so like i love that your hormones are making you be like and another thing like that's great but taylor loves it too because you know it took us a while because when we first started and he's just someone that knows what he wants and he's very confident what he wants to say he wants to talk about it now the first time that ever happened which i also didn't have conflict in my previous even dating relationships i was like oh like it's the end of like it's just the brain turns off it's the end of the world i can't even process a thought like i'm just frozen in shock and i need 24 hours and when taylor and i first started dating he took my silence as like oh so you like don't care about what i'm saying and really it's just quite the opposite like i can't even really process what he's saying and now now it's really sweet because he'll like he'll talk to me like okay do you like need a minute like i'm gonna go take a shower and then we come back down and finish you want to talk about it now what do you like it's just it's really cool and we have such an amazing relationship where we can communicate how we're feeling that is the best and i hope for everyone watching and listening that you get to that point where like you know you're in a really positive healthy relationship when you learn each other's patterns essentially and you learn how each other copes and how you process things and i was the same with matt we're like i needed a minute and he would be like let's talk it through and i'd be like i can't talk about this right now and that in the beginning of our relationship was our like thing and now we do the same exact thing that you guys are saying yeah he's like okay like let's give a second and i feel like i've had a lot of people write in that will always say like we just can't seem to like make it work in that category and i think a lot of that just comes from genuine respect and willingness to see the other person and recognize that in order to actually progress and get over this argument or whatever it was you need to respect the other person and how they process and you have to meet in the middle to some degree and sometimes that also means you need to be the one that is a little bit more lenient and the other because when you look at it as like wins and you can't go into it being like wanting to like dig the dagger and deeper and i'm so thankful taylor and i have never like i we just we just want we want to be heard we want the other to hear us and i'm not trying to make him feel bad for something and even if one of us does something that the other doesn't like it's like like this you did this like i don't want to make you feel bad but this is how it made me feel like just like like productive fighting is i think what needs to happen like you can't i want taylor to feel happy and i want him to feel seen and heard i make him feel worse no and the goal is resolution not a win yes we're gonna do a little rapid fire to close out are you ready yeah my dogs have been very extra needy do you think your dogs know you're pregnant that's a really good question and that's not a rapid fire answer i think they knew that i was really struggling in my first trimester because they were really cuddly because i was not leaving the couch and they were like really chill but i am trying to figure out if they do if they do now yeah one of my dogs definitely wouldn't know because she's like a house cat and i feel like she's not that with it the other one yeah okay what is something you cried over while pregnant that you can laugh about now oh god um like everything oh god just like even the smallest things honestly probably me crying for the first time seeing my dog and i'm like oh my god i'm like oh my god i'm like oh my god myself in the mirror like i'm just i i can laugh about it now because even though i'm still there it's just like i'm just laughing through the pain okay perfect what is something you wish people would stop asking pregnant women i'm just gonna say how are you feeling but i don't know what a better question honestly that is good like how do you think i'm feeling oh i have had some people that i don't know touch my belly though and i'm like oh and god bless my i my close friends like even my mom every time before she touches she's like can i touch your belly i'm like thanks mom like and i'm fine like my girlfriend's not like i have like my close friends i'm fine if they're they touch my belly but if i don't know you being like oh you're like that is that is such a good one it's similar to like how people feel so comfortable to talk about our bodies when we're pregnant the touching is fucking crazy you're like do you want to touch my tits too i'm just realizing this i actually can relate to taylor now because women would just come up and literally touch his abs you're gonna go home be like babe another thing we relate on that we're gonna connect over different body shapes they're touching your abs and my abs that are like now separated have yours separated yet i had my legs up on the wall the other night and i like sat up to grab something and right here goes down but this is like squishy in the middle that has not happened to me but when i tell you my ribs i feel have you had heartburn oh yeah the heartburn that i'm experiencing under like yeah here and then like right in the rib here oh my god like i've been like rubbing my rib this episode because i'm literally like oh it's happening right here and i'm like i don't like the way that this feels yeah um what has been your experience with pregnancy brain it's been a struggle i actually was even gonna ask you this because i feel like it's hard for me obviously one being someone who's so driven i've really had to i like pride myself on being able to do like five things at once and like remember all of these things and do all this stuff and when that's over i'm like oh my god i'm like oh my god i'm like oh my god i'm like oh my god i'm like oh my god i'm like oh my god i'm like oh my god i'm like oh my god i'm like oh my god i was like oh okay like it really made me have to like sit down and just accept it i think that's probably something i cried over and now i'm like okay with it and i think it's good that i'm it's making me chill a little more because i need to but even like with the podcast like how every time and i feel like it's harder for you because you have the paper i have my laptop so i will erase a question if i ask it because i then can't remember if i ask a question and i was just doing an event yesterday with cue cards and i was like moderating these two panels and i was like you bouncing around you know like if there's if i bring up something then you go to that topic and i was doing that and i was like wait i actually can't remember if i asked this who said what like no no i will say like i i love that you brought that up because it's almost like i haven't wanted to admit it to myself yeah i remember like two specific interviews i had i was so frustrated with myself because i was like trying so hard to lock in and i couldn't lock in the way that i'm used to and so every day is different for me like yesterday i did an interview and i was like oh my god i'm so locked in today i'm more relaxed because i'm like i knew i could slip up i know i could be like can you just sit here in silence like i feel so comfortable with you but it is frustrating and i agree with you i'm not there yet i need to get there of like giving myself more grace because i love my job so much but also my job is weird where like my whole goal is to make people feel comfortable and make it feel seamless and flow and not have them even feel like i'm interviewing them so that has if anything been something where it's like when i have interviews now i'm trying to make my days less of like i had meetings in the morning and meetings after the interview so that i can just the whole day is focused on the person sitting in this chair and giving them all of the brain power i humanly possibly have because the minute after i finish interviews now i'm like goodbye everyone anyone need anything from me okay perfect it makes me feel i'm like i am paying attention but it's like i just i can't it's not there it's it's hard and part of me you know i used to at the beginning doing stuff in first trimester like it's easy because like you know this this is our job like this it's this it's sitting like we're not like my best friend you know delivering babies for a living so like that's something i'm so grateful for but then it's like oh like i actually like this does require a lot of brain power and i never actually mental like realize that no we are doing ping pong right now and i feel like we're doing okay as two pregnant ladies sitting here this is great i i mean they we may look over and everyone seemed like i mean we're like in our own world of productions in the back like uh me already forgetting i was supposed to be doing rapid fire with you i'm like wait okay what has been the most recommended pregnancy item to you by friends i think the i mean my biggest one of my biggest saviors has been like the migraine cap because i had the worst headaches in my first trimester and even now i'll like do it if i'm feeling overwhelmed or just like i would sleep with it every night even if i didn't have a migraine because i was so warm i would just would like sleep on it that i have like a little nausea stick that's like a scent thing which i actually originally got from boating on the lake because i would get like seasick but not on the boat it was weird it's like the after when you have like the sea legs that's what would get me and so i had it for motion sickness and i literally have one in like every bag everywhere it's the best thing a little portable fan oh yeah i like that yeah is any part of you nesting yet and like what are some things that you're preparing i finally cleaned out the room that's going to be the nursery which um i that that took me a minute to finally do but then i was like you know people like does the baby even really use the nursery like in the beginning so i'm like if it's a little late it's fine um yeah no definitely nesting but then also part of me is like i'm always nesting because i that's what i do and i'm stressed as i clean and organize and do that kind of stuff of course um you have your podcast to squeeze and i know you said that not all of your episodes will be pregnancy related but also that is the reality of what you are going through how are you going to continue to like share your journey yeah i think i yeah i mean it definitely is starting to be more pregnancy heavy than i was expecting but also that's i think that's honestly where a lot of my audience is at ironically um so no i'm just i think it's so special and i haven't enjoyed sharing about my struggles this much ever before because it's just it's it's such a unique experience and it's so special and um kind of like how we were talking about earlier like i just did like you don't know what to expect and i even say now like i was i was such a bad friend to my friends that have been pregnant and our moms because like you just like you truly don't know and i used to roll my eyes all the time and my mom would say that to me like as a kid and now i'm like oh no there's actually like truth to that i will never be able to unsee it and unfeel it it's like whoa this is so much more than i ever understood again because the glamorization we think a woman just oh she's pregnant she looks great pops it out oh when you get underneath the hood of it and the amount that goes into living the experience damn um last question to anyone who is just finding out they're pregnant this week last week whatever it is they're entering this first trimester what advice do you have for them honestly just go into it prepared i think i just wasn't prepared i was expecting it to be a lot less worse than it was and i think if i was better prepared than i would have been able to maybe mentally handle it a little better so i would i would also add to that and to give you some grace like the mental and physical toll it takes i also think that there's only so much preparing you can do yeah and i as women i we are so incredible because our bodies we we we just forget and we keep it moving to survive and i believe that like when women talk about birth and they're like right after like that was the hardest thing in the world and then you ask them a couple months later and they're like it wasn't that bad yeah we there's an amnesia part of it that during the first trimester it's literally just like day by day just get through but when i got to like my halfway point i like forgot i had to do like vaginal progesterone for the first month which was just weird i did not like having to do that um i had like a weird heart thing like i had so many things happening that i'm like oh i like i forgot i wore a heart monitor for two weeks like i'm like there's just so many little things that i like forget now and i don't say that to like minimize how anyone's feeling but it helps get through yeah just you got it you gotta just hold on i can't thank you enough for coming on i we didn't cry go us we i love how we sat down and we almost started crying just by talking like we were like hi and then by the end we're like we were so strong yeah we were so on it but seriously thank you so much for coming on i'm so happy for you i just oh my god your little girl is going to be the cutest ever and i'm just so happy for you and taylor and just all the good vibes and energy to you on this next chapter of your life thank you so much for oh my gosh same i can't wait for our little lake babies so fun love you