Tarot Therapy: Tarot as a Transitional Object, Space, & Phenomena

[Music] You are listening to the Tera diagnosis. I'm your host, Shannon. I'm a licensed psychotherapist and I also happen to have a love for Tera. Each episode I invite to reflect with me as I work to demystify the Tera and the human experience, all while exploring Tera's connection to mental and emotional health. While this podcast may feel therapeutic, it is not meant to take the place of psychotherapy. So, grab your cards and join me as I work to create a pathway to better understand ourselves and those around us. We're getting a bit nerdy on the podcast today because we're going to be talking about themes of developmental psychology and Tera as a transitional object and more broadly transitional phenomena and transitional space. These are all concepts from psychoanalyst Donald Winnecott that explain how we use certain objects or experiences to bridge what's happening inside of us with what's happening outside of us. And of course Tera can work in the same way. Tera becomes a bridge between our inner world and our outer world, bridging our thoughts and feelings with external patterns and symbols and ways we make meaning with the world. I'm particularly excited about this podcast today because it was inspired by a very good friend of mine who is brilliant and whose views on Tera are always so refreshing and enlightening. So, many things in love to my friend Rob for introducing me to the concept of Tera as a transitional object, which of course inspired today's episode as well as a recent workshop I hosted inside the symposium. So, let's get into it. [Music] So, like I mentioned a moment ago, the person who first defined the concept of the transitional object was Donald Winnecott. And he was both a pediatrician and a psychoanalyst because that was possible back in the day. And he came up with these really important ideas about how children grow and develop and first wrote about them back in the 1950s and then later expanded on them in the 70s in his book "Playing in Reality." And even now decades later his concepts are pretty central psychoanalysis and developmental theory. I mean, if you've ever taken an intro to psychology class or I mean a developmental psychology class or if you work with a children in any capacity, you've probably read about or studied Winnecott's work in some way. And you've probably heard of the concept of a comfort item. I would be surprised if you hadn't. And these are things like a blanket or a stuffed animal in Winnecott all referred to these as transitional objects. He noticed that things, you know, like blankets and stuffed animals actually helped children move from complete dependence on a caregiver towards moments of independence. Winnecott found that these transitional objects and childhood were usually special familiar items that the child chose. And they were something that the child gave meaning to because it helped them feel safe, especially when they were apart from a parent or caregiver. So you can kind of think of it as a bridge. So on one side of the bridge, the child is completely dependent on their caretaker. And then on the other side of the bridge, they're having the experience of being on their own without the comfort and attachment of the parent or caregiver. And transitional objects are what give them the strength and the ability to cross that bridge. And because these objects are, you know, familiar and comforting and really taking on an important role, especially emotionally, they do a lot of heavy lifting when it comes to emotional regulation and self-suiting. And through the lens of child development, they give the child a sense of security, kind of like, you know, a piece of the caregiver, a piece of home that they can hold onto where they feel safe and secure. And like I mentioned, these are usually blankets, stuffed animals, but also think like pacifiers, dolls, toys. And it's funny when I was when I was reflecting on this, and I was thinking about my own transitional objects growing up. I had two. One, that is kind of like outside the norm because I definitely had a blanket. I mean, I feel like most children do growing up. And it's not uncommon to name these transitional objects. Like for me, my blanket, I called it my night night because I couldn't fall asleep without it. But besides taking it to bed, I mean, it went everywhere with me. And you know, it was one of those transitional objects that eventually over time was just so tattered and warm to shreds and ripped. You know, and eventually, you know, only had one tiny, you know, ripped, frayed corner existing of it. But another transitional object that, you know, kind of came flooding back, that I had a vivid memory of was being in preschool. And my mom would spray a tissue with her perfume and then put it in a little Ziploc baggie. And so when I was, you know, in preschool, if I started missing her or if, you know, that shift from home to school felt a little too destabilizing or overwhelming, I could open the bag, the little baggie, and instantly kind of feel comforted because it's, it smells just like my mom. And so kind of felt like she was right there with me. When it caught took this concept of the transitional object much further though. And he explored something much bigger, what he called the transitional phenomena. And this is probably my favorite aspect of the concept and developmental theories of transitional objects because transitional phenomena is the emotional and kind of psychological and developmental experience that if we're still looking at this through the lens of child development, that a child has while holding on to their transitional object, their comfort item. And it's not just the transitional object that creates the experience. I think that's what's really exciting about transitional phenomena. It's what happens within the child's inner world when they use that transitional object to feel safe or soothed or connected to someone or something. What's interesting about the kind of connection between, you know, Taro and this theory of transitional objects is in kind of the same way with Taro as a therapeutic tool, the power and magic of transitional phenomena in Taro doesn't lie in the cards themselves. So if you've been listening to me for a while, if you follow my work, you know that I approach the cards through a therapeutic secular lens. And so, you know, when we're talking about this concept of transitional objects and transitional phenomena, the phenomena emerges in the way that we relate to the card. You know, it's the emotions and all those feelings that come up when we have an experience with an archetype like I think maybe just an easy universal experience here is when we pull the tower during, you know, a moment of crisis or when we feel like everything's kind of falling apart around us or when maybe after the tower moment we then pull the star because we're able to experience that phenomena of hope and tenderness and nurturing and care. It's also the moments of, you know, having an epiphany that we maybe weren't expecting to have when we pull a card, you know, it's that kind of aha moment where something clicks and then, you know, our internal world kind of shifts and there's this really unique experience that happens between us and the cards. I think it's, you know, that sense of being seen, that sense of being, you know, felt and held and even immersed in wisdom, you know, it's also our inner world being reflected back to us, you know, through the cards. That's what happens that helps facilitate the experience of transitional phenomena. And I think another component here that's important to remember because when we're reading for ourselves or really just in general, there's so much projection that happens with tarot and, you know, that's kind of part of the process. And so the transitional phenomena that occurs with tarot is also about projection where we're assigning meaning to, you know, this object, this card in a way that bridges, you know, our self with, you know, maybe the outside world. It's similar to, you know, to go back to kind of these developmental theories of transitional objects where children imagine that their stuffed animal, you know, misses them. You know, or they sit down and have like a tea party with their toys and they talk to them and they're, you know, kind of exploring the world through their transitional objects. It's similar with us with our tarot cards, you know. It just looks different and maybe perhaps more refined. You know, we say things like, oh, the skirt card is really speaking to me. Or, you know, if we have a particular deck that we enjoy based on, you know, kind of what we need in, you know, different areas of our life, we might say things like, oh, you know, this particular deck over here I use when I'm feeling really happy. Or, you know, this one over here I use when I'm sad or feeling lonely and each one knows me so well. Or I think the most common phrase we can all relate to is when we say things like, oh, the cards read me to filth today. You know, these aren't, you're rational statements. They're valid and they are true to you. And they're the kind of epitome of how transitional phenomena works. You know, these cards give form to our emotions and they make our kind of internal world tangible. It brings the internal to the external. Another fascinating component to all of this is what Winocont described as transitional space. So we can think of this as kind of like that in between area. It's the psychological space where the transitional phenomena is experienced. So through developmental cyclans, it's the space that usually exists between parent and child or between inner and outer reality. And it's in that space that Winocont also theorize that culture, creativity and play are all born, which I think is really cool. And it's where the child's imagination starts to meet the outside world and where their relationship to reality can start to take shape. And this idea of transitional space, just like transitional objects and transitional phenomena does not disappear once we become an adult. It's still that in between place where imagination and reality meets, it's this super personal intimate space where our creativity and our healing and our meaning making all kind of a live. And especially when we step into a space of pulling cards. When I was reflecting on these concepts and how transitional objects evolve with us into adulthood, along with transitional space and transitional phenomena, I ended up coming across an article that was published probably about 10 years ago where I psychologist Mark Brenner called transitional objects in adulthood sacred keepsakes, which I thought was such an accurate representation of how transitional objects evolve with us, especially as we move into adulthood. And our keepsakes might look a little different than a child's blanket or teddy bear, but they serve the same purpose. And beyond tarot, these sacred keepsakes could also be these childhood toys. It could be a stuffed animal that you have still held onto. And in times of deep nostalgia or emotional need, you still gravitate towards. It could be a photo of really important piece of jewelry, a family heirloom. Even a song, I think songs are big transitional objects, especially when we think about how this concept evolves with us over time. We could have a song that represents different parts of our life, different decades that we tend to seek out based on how we're feeling or what we're going through, also clothing. But I think maybe more universally right now, all of us, I think use our cell phones as probably the most prominent transitional object. And what's interesting, especially when we think about the use of our cell phones as a transitional object, when we lose these items or when we forget them somewhere here or we just don't have access to them, it leaves us feeling pretty unsettled. In the same way that we would feel upset or unsettled in childhood if we couldn't find our blanket or our stuffed animal. Although hopefully now has adults our ability to regulate our emotional response is a little bit different than when we were children. But I think it's that kind of universal unsettled feeling that happens across the lifespan. We don't have access to that transitional object that really does show how deeply these items function as anchors for our emotional stability and our need to have a sense of calm and comfort and security. And I would take a guess that if you're listening to this podcast right now, tarot is probably one of your own adult transitional objects that's that item that helps you feel a sense of calm helps you regulate your nervous system because it becomes this bridge between what's going on inside of you and what's happening outside of you. When we work with tarot, the cards are essentially holding in our mirrors of our internal world, our inner thoughts and our feelings, things that we are conscious of and not conscious of. And yet at the same time they also reflect the symbols and the archetypes and the patterns of our external world. And it's universal in that anybody could pick up a deck of tarot cards and be able to relate to them in some way. So they're both deeply personal to us and yet totally separate from us at the same time. And actually that is a whole other concept that when a cop talked about in terms of transitional objects, this idea of being both personal and separate is what he referred to as me, not me, which I feel like is so tarot coded because like I said, anyone can pick up these cards and see themselves in the cards. And yet they are not the cards. We can have a very personal relationship to the cards and someone else can take those same exact cards. It's same deck you were just using and have their own very unique personal experience with them. And so that's a perfect example and shows how the cards naturally create that in between space, that transitional space I was talking about earlier. They give us room to explore difficult stuff. They allow us to process emotions that maybe we didn't know how to or maybe even provide the language to process and explore feelings or experiences that we didn't have the words for prior. And I think the cards also help us slowly make sense of how we exist in the world, how we exist in relationships, as well as better understand the realities that we're facing. I think another kind of important note too, especially for a lot of the folks that tend to use tarot or engage with this content, you can even think of the transitional space as being where you conduct ritual. I talked about witchcraft a psycho drama a while back on the podcast. This transitional witchcraft is absolutely an example of transitional space. We're doing kind of meaning making and tarot lives in that space naturally. And these practices all give form to what's happening inside of us. Well, hopefully also keeping us connected to reality and the outside world. So I was thinking about concrete ways that tarot functions as a transitional object. And I came up with a list and I just want to go through the list real quick. As I'm sharing this list, I encourage you to make your own. I want you to think about as you're listening and just engaging with the cards and just how you engage with them personally, how they show up for you as a transitional object. So the first thing that came to my mind when I was thinking about how tarot functions as a transitional object was a year ahead card. Because this card bridges one year to the next. Think about when we do the numerology, we're in a hermit year this year. We're about to be in a Wheel of Fortune year next. How we sit with and embrace and engage with that archetype to help us cope with what might be in store. Also birth cards helping us navigate solar return. If you are someone who pulls a weekly card to help your energy, focus, I do this each week and then I turn the card into an affirmation and then I create a sigil out of that affirmation. That's a pretty clear, straightforward example of the transitional objects, the transitional space and then the transitional phenomena all in one succinct experience. But the cards can also anchor you through major life changes. They can guide you through grief and loss. There are transitional objects if you use them to open or close a ritual or a therapy session for journaling. If you are someone who carries a card with you in your bag or even if you have like an image of a card as your background screen on your phone, that would absolutely count as a transitional object. Also just like the tarantile experience of shuffling, even if you are not pulling a card and you are needing to kind of fidget with something, these are all ways that tarot functions as a transitional object. I mentioned at the beginning of this episode that this topic was also inspired a workshop that I recently did inside the symposium and part of that workshop was multiple exercises and spreads related to this. I thought, "You know what, I'm going to also bring that to this episode." We're not going to go through all of them. If you're interested in that, you can join the community. The recordings are always available. I want to take a moment to guide you through a brief three card spread inspired by this whole concept. I'm calling it the container spread because transitional objects and transitional space really feel like a container for me. They're holding our conscious and our subconscious feelings. They're comforting us and they're giving us the opportunity to step outside of our comfort zone. What I'm going to do is I'll read the positions of all three cards first and then pull cards with all of you. If you've signed up to receive emails from me and the tarot diagnosis, then you already have this spread image in your inbox. You grab that also side note about emails. If you do receive my emails but don't open them often, then they'll probably end up in your spam folders. I've had a few people reach out to me and say, "I don't see your emails anymore. Are you still sending newsletters?" Yes, yes I am. But you have to open them. Otherwise, your email provider or my email provider thinks you don't want them. Every once in a while, just open an email for me so you don't miss when I share spreads like this with my episode announcements. So, I'm going to pull and read this as a collective reading. For all of you listening right now, it'll just be just a general collective reading for this. I'm just going to read the positions of the cards and then I'll reread the positions of the cards as I pull them. Card one is what feels too heavy right now that needs to be held or contained? Card two is the representation of the transitional object or in this case a transitional archetype because it's a tarot card. And that's going to act as the container that's holding what we pull in card one. It's too heavy. And we're just going to reflect on what it would look like to allow that archetype to be a container. And then card three is going to be more action oriented. So, what can we do while this feeling or experience is being held or contained? Okay. So, I actually reached for my pagan other world's deck today. I've been thinking about it quite a bit recently. I can't even remember last time I pulled from it. It's been a while, but it's on my desk. So, I see it pretty regularly. But yeah, it was calling out to me today. So, that's what we're using. I feel like I get a lot of depth when I use the stack. I feel like if I want to get really deep in my head and kind of feel a connection to something outside of me too, this is the deck I gravitate towards. So, all right, card one. What feels too heavy right now that needs to be held or contained? Okay. Kind of swords. Yeah, ouch. So, traditionally, we know that this card is about or can be about, I should say, feeling trapped. And because it's a sword suit, often we attribute it to feeling trapped by our thoughts, kind of self-limiting beliefs. So, from more of a therapeutic lens, you know, this might, and especially in terms of what's too heavy right now, because that's what this card is for, what's too heavy, it could be all of our thoughts, our intrusive thoughts, our thought loops, rumination, distorted beliefs, and also just the heaviness of everything that's happening around us in the world right now, everything that we are witnessing and reading about. All of that lives inside of us, you know, thinking about how much we're exposed to when we open social media and we scroll, and all of that is contained within us and can absolutely, especially in the state of the world that we're in right now, make us feel trapped and unsure of how to escape our mind and what's happening. So, that feels unbrand. All right, so card two is the container card. So this is the transitional object that is going to act as the container that holds the eight of swords for us. Let's see, let's see what's going to hold the eight of swords. Oh, the queen of swords, the queen of swords is the container for the eight of swords. I love this. I knew, I knew this deck would show up for me today. Look at that. I'm even using the language that I explored with you earlier about this being a transitional object. Oh, the queen of swords. She is my favorite card in the whole deck. I love her so much. She is all about setting boundaries, clarity. She's so ready to discern. I think it's a transitional archetype. She definitely offers this psychological container, especially one that is lined with rationality and logic and unapologetic truth. I think allowing her to hold onto the heaviness of the eight of swords might, might be about kind of externalizing everything that's within us. Because the queen of swords is unoffrained to hear things. I look at her as someone who's kind of heard it all. The queen of swords is unfazed. Like, okay, that's what you're thinking. Yeah, here, hand it over. I've heard it before. Type of thing. This might look like allowing those thoughts to live outside of you for a moment, so naming them, writing them down. I feel like the queen of swords would totally challenge them. That's an archetype where they're going to be like, let's find the evidence that supports this type of thing. I think this archetype would also be willing to be totally brutally honest in the sense of, yeah, everything that you're thinking and feeling right now is true. Let me just hold on to it for you for a bit. Well, you figure out what to do with it. The queen of swords might say something like, I'll hold on to this for you right now, but I'm not going to do the work for you. But I'm also not going to let it distort your reality. I'm also not going to let it kind of take over your internal world. From a therapeutic perspective, this is a very similar to cognitive restructuring. So interesting, the queen of swords holding the eight of swords. Okay, let's hold the third card. This is going to be again, the action card. What can you do while your queen of swords is holding your eight of swords? Basically, what's your responsibility while that's being held? These are kind of heavy cards, say, okay, nine of ones, paying another world is not missing around. So, this makes sense though. The nine of ones, typically in traditional, right-o-way, Smith imagery, the person depicted in the card, you know, does a look pretty worn down and pagan other worlds, there's no figure. It's just the ones. It's more of a pip deck. So, I still think it's important to acknowledge that kind of feeling run down, but there's, in the sense of fatigue that this card represents, but it's also a card of endurance. And, ooh, you know, paired with the Queen of Swords, there's a lot of like kind of keep going here, don't give up. The Queen of Swords being willing to kind of hold some of the burden while you figure out how to kind of maintain or reestablish boundaries. 'Cause both of these cards feeling boundary cards for me, like the Queen of Swords, absolutely a boundary card, but the nine of ones too, like they've literally built this wall of ones up and they're standing guard. So, I think it's important to look at, you know, what would it look like, you know, if my fears and my worries were being held, but when I have the ability to do in order to protect myself right now. So, you know, small acts of coping and self-protection so that we can prevent overwhelm and collapse, which that's exactly the whole point of a transitional object. (laughs) Oh wow, so the card showed up for us today. It seems like, well, I hope that you all enjoyed this developmental psych slash tarot intersection episode. And as always, you can sign up for my email list for all kinds of tarot goodness and you can pre-order my upcoming book, Dark Shadow Golden Shadow, or I have lots of media exercises and ways to explore your shadow and your golden shadow and safe and healthy ways. Thank you so much for listening to the tarot diagnosis. For more tarot and mental health content, follow the tarot diagnosis on Instagram. You can also subscribe to the podcast so you never miss an episode and sign up to receive the tarot diagnosis emails where you'll have access to exclusive spreads and exciting announcements. To join an incredible community of tarot and psychology enthusiasts, join the tarot diagnosis membership community, the symposium, by visiting thetarotagnests.com. (upbeat music)