Summer S’pouses Episode 1

Some responses with Conan O'Brien, Sonum of Cessian, and Mack Gourley, and Eliza Paolo O'Brien, Tak Barayan, and Amanda Lund. Hey there, and welcome to Conan O'Brien, needs a friend. We're doing something different today. Let me take you back in time for a number of years now. In the summer, we have done a series, a segment called "Summer Smores." I think it began as an offshoot of my bitter complaint that I thought "Smores" was a terrible failure as a dessert and a snack. I think it's a failure. Failure. We don't need to navigate this again. We're not going to let it go. You can dislike it, but you can't say it's a failure. We're not going to let it go again. Thank you. But you can say, you don't like it. The response I had on the internet was fantastic. People said I agree with you, Conan. It's a snack that no one really enjoys, but they pretend they do. It's like Atlantic City. You're supposed to enjoy it. Then you get there, and it's terrible. It's not the same as Atlantic City. Bucket of Diaria. Here we go. Oh, not a failure. Okay. So any hoots? Yeah. But a failure. But anyway, my point is that that was a series, and then it grew into us doing all kinds of mostly drinking. There's a lot of drinking in summer s'mores. You met with, unveiled these incredible cocktails. Sony, you would go to town on these cocktails. And then after you had a team, many martinis, you would, we would say and do things. People really enjoyed it. And we did that for a number of years, and it was fun while it lasted. Yeah. We thought, let's try something different this time around. And so, ladies and gentlemen, I bring you the beginning of an exciting new series. It's exclusive to this summer, 2026, and it's called summer spouses. Just like summer s'mores, but spouses, S, and then the little apostrophe, spouses, which I guess we're saying is really the full title of summer, some more spouses, yeah, some spouses. So if you're going off the s'mores thing, when you, the s'mores are s'mores because it's S apostrophe more, yeah, some more, some more, some questions. Yeah, when you took us down this little island, did you know it would be a dead end or in your case a dud end or this was me just taking a bullet to get you guys off fucking arguing about s'mores. Yeah. Yeah. We were off that. Yeah. If you listen to the tape, you'll find that we were safely a new territory. I find you guilty on all counts, and Sona smores bad. So here we are at summer spouses. Is it spouses or spouses? Oh my god. Okay, I'm just going to plow ahead without you. I am dissolving this, this parliament and I'm charging ahead. I have now like Napoleon. I'm just going to make myself emperor. Should we explain what this is and how it will unfold? How about that? We are going to chat amongst ourselves. Then we are going to one episode at a time, bring one of our spouses in here. And so we are going to bring in Amanda, Matt, we're going to bring in Tak, Sona and Liza has agreed to come in and join the podcast for the first time, providing she doesn't have to be married to me anymore. Oh, okay. Finally. She was on once to plug her podcast. Oh, that's right. She was on it. Okay. All right. So she has technically been on once. But anyway, so this is going to be exciting and I'm looking forward to it. I don't know what's going to happen. And we should also mention there are two episodes past that. So it's just us. Then each one of them gets an individual episode and then the fifth episode is just the three of them without us. Yes. It's going to be Tak, Amanda and Liza, just them in a room talking. And then I think for the final episode, it's us, them and a bunch of attorneys. It's going to be a long episode, but you're really going to get, you're going to see all of our assets, which is pretty cool. Pretty cool. Oh, I'm looking forward to that. So are we going to drink? No, there's no drinking in this one, but you can take as many gummies as you like. And again, shout out to our gummy friends. What's their name again? Camino. I'm going to go to town on this. Have you? Yeah. I haven't really. I have not. I'm still cautiously waiting. Oh, my God. I'm cautiously waiting. I thought it was like wine. I have a gummy seller. No. It's the opposite. They're just going to turn into weird little husks. Okay. You're going to hang your gummies, age? Yeah. I have a little gummy rack in my basement and I go down and I'm like, well, these ones are, these mellow me. Now, these are chill over here. He's smoking some of them. And then you blow dust off them when you take them out. This gummy was from 1844, was owned by James K. Polk. Yeah. Do you imagine a gummy sommelier coming to your table and he's talking to you about what you want. He's thinking and then he brings you a tiny, tiny little shred of gummy for the tasting. For the taste and you swish it around in your mouth. Yeah. And then you spit it out and then he slaps you. I don't know. I just bet you you're going poo and him slapping you. It's just, it's part of the tradition anyway. This is, um, this was, I believe Matt, if I'm correct, this was your brain child. I suppose so. Uh, I like this. I think it's fascinating. It's real shit's going to get real. Yeah. How do you think it's going to go? Like, what do you, what do you think, uh, are we going to make it through this? Is it going to be just lighthearted or are we going to, you know, I think well tax nervous. Why is he nervous? Cause he, first of all, uh, he is an incredibly genial, funny guy. He seems like a natural. Why would tack me nervous? Because this is outside of his wheelhouse. This is weird for him. But also, you know, every time you mention him, it's either you're talking about him being responsible for Chernobyl. No. No, wait a minute. I didn't say he was responsible. I never said he was responsible. You did say he was responsible. I said that he went to it. He went to a summer camp near Chernobyl. Well, yeah. I never said it was his fault. Let me just make a note to ask him if he is indeed a responsible for Chernobyl. If there's tape, I want to roll it of you saying he's responsible for Ukraine. But I also don't want anyone to do work. So if we can't, I'm looking at you like, what the hell are you doing? No, no. I never said that. I know you did. Yes, what? Now I suspect he was. Oh, yeah. There is a bit of a lady doth. He was playing softball near the near Chernobyl and hit a high fly. It went into the quarry actor, Melta. This is exactly what I don't want you to do. And why did you bring this up because I'm laying out rules to make him tell me what I can't do because then I'll do it. Okay. But it's like when I read ads on the show, they always give me three sheets that say, don't say this product will kill you. Don't say this product is responsible for the deaths of 10. And I'm thinking, why are they that would never have occurred to me, but now that they put it in my head, yeah, jacks are murderers. Oh, I don't say, I don't want you to say chop when you talk about karate. Like I don't want you to say, Oh, chop in the air, we only he's a karate, he's a karate champion. He just got his black belt. And I've just always pictured him saying, I chop, I chop you as he chops. I know. Can you just not say the word chop when you talk about what is wrong with you? You brought what you keep putting these things in my head that you tell me not to think about. Okay. And it's like that episode where Germans come and stay at faulty towers and they keep saying to John, please don't mention the war. And as like at the end, he loses his mind and starts goose tipping around the dining room. That's what you're doing right now. You're planting this in my head. So stop it. Just stop it. Okay. I love tack. He's really funny. Yes. Multi-talented. He said that you and and tack are the JFK and Jackie of the Armenian set. You really are. Very glamorous. Cool. Cool. Cooler Armenian couple than you guys. There's a lot of really cool ones. Probably. I just haven't looked into it. I don't know. I don't want to know a lot. Now, okay. So I think he's going to be great. I really do. And I'm a massive fan of his Matt. Let's talk about. I mean, first of all, you've this beautiful wife, very talented Amanda has. She's a performer. She's a natural. I think that she'd be built for this. Oh, I think so. She's very breezy and comfortable in these situations. I think she'll have a blast with tack and Liza. She's done many podcasts of her own. We're some kind of weird podcasting family. I think there's a good chance now that I'm thinking about tack, thinking about Amanda. Liza is incredibly smart and funny. I'm thinking now that they will replace us. That's what I was saying. And there's a real danger of losing this. This is stupid. I wish we had married Dunderheads and idiots. You know what I mean? Yeah. Just this was a mistake. I think you might be right. But we've announced it. It's going to happen. And I also believe in the freedom of the marketplace here in capitalism. If we can't hang onto this podcast, we deserve to lose it. But maybe it's the perfect plan because we lose it, but the money still stays in the family. We don't have to work. I'm pretty sure my wife would immediately set up a separate account. Liza comes from Scottish. They're very, her dad, super smart, frugal. Yeah. I think she would start. What are you saying about the Scottish? I'm curious. Yeah. Don't you know this old song about the Scottish? Oh, they're quite tight with their money. They're very careful with their money. And that's a compliment. They're really, they can make their money last a very long time. Oh, good for them. Yes. That's a famous old stereotype. And if it's all. If it's a stereotype that's a really old one and it's about white people you're allowed to have fun with that's true Boy those Scottish people are cheap. I'm in his very fun goal too So she might she's the frugal one in our family as she gets a scotch blood in her I can really double down on it. Yeah, well, I'm gonna get sued by some Scottish guy What are they gonna come after me? I don't think so yeah with this cast of train spotting is after me What am I gonna do? Wait, we won't even understand them in court now. They're coming. Yeah, now they're coming They try and sneak up. Oh, I'm not worried about them coming because they'll try and sneak up on me They'll drop their bagpipes. I know there. You always know they're coming 20 minutes beforehand Anyway This Scottish slander on their bingo card. I loved your Scottish. I'm telling you. This is my new rule If it's about a white group of people who you know have been around for thousands and thousands of years go to town Yeah, those Lutherans Well, don't get me started on the Welsh Yeah, I think this is this is a worthwhile experiment. We have fans also I'm gonna bring this up Oh, people see us is just these remote Figures who have unattainable fame. They look at Sona and Gorillia myself and they just think of us You know like oh those are like founding fathers of podcast comedy. They're unapproachable. They're up in the clouds They're made of marble. There's too perfect our spouses will for the first time bring us to life Yeah, you'll start to maybe hear about some of the foibles we have. That's right. We may have foibles We may even have I don't know. Maybe you guys have a flaw We might hear about some things that make us human bring us down from Mount Olympus and We might bring maybe breathe some life into it After years of listening to People think we're flawless I maintain that we have we have held ourselves up with this impossible ideal Do you know what I mean? Oh my god. Just people picture us like wearing togas Staining a stride of clouds. I've never had more dirty laundry air to my life than on this goddamn dog in pony show How many times my family has been embarrassed by me like just the things I've said I'm saying is we were just talking about how I get drunk a lot On summer s'mores, so yeah, that's why I mean we were gonna do another summer, but your counts that are talked to us So did the law Just your doctor feel good We are there with me. I am excited about this. I am honestly a little bit anxious. Yeah, I don't know what's gonna happen and But lies is not going to discuss my bed wetting. I think that's what I think will be the most candid of the three of them That's interesting Amanda you think so mm-hmm. Yeah, I was thinking maybe lies, but maybe not wise will be very candid Yeah, yeah, and I think she may see this as you know summer spouses the revenge. Yeah time to get some things on record Yeah, yeah, she may see this as a chance What if this ends up becoming some like admissible evidence and court somehow, you know, let me be being court Well like we're getting first of all growing the Scott you're taking us, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, so all of Scotland is taking me in and You know, but you know, I think I can handle them. No one will understand their dresses Drunken Conan. Oh my god. I am my Tarzan I am Scottish. I don't even know why I'm sitting here taking this, you know because you're just What are you gonna do? What is your by the way? What is your yeah, what is your genetic makeup? And that's a fair question to ask people. Yeah, what are you made of? Are you how much how Scotch are you? Because Liza? I think is She's a good dose of Scottish. She's like half. Well, I think she's a mixture of Scottish Welsh Well, she'll tell us what am I doing? She'll tell us I'm Scots Irish, which is really mostly Scottish and then English Right, so you have a tiny bit of Irish. I have I think it was like 16 or 20 percent I wrote so exotic. Yeah, I don't know. It's laughing the artist. Yeah, it is to me it is When you're 100.000 percent Irish. I know and this guy comes in. I'm like whoa, it's a rostrifier Hey, man An exotic blend of Welsh Irish Scottish Three villages that were eight miles from each other It's basically you're describing a bog. Yeah, it's what you're describing. I'm looking forward to this I think it's going to be good. Now here's the big question. Who's looking after kids? My kids are in their late 50s That is not a concern for a big thing for us. I don't know about you But both my girls are coming here and luckily Adam's daughter is going to play with my oldest daughter Glenn and then Sarah who's also been on the summer There's more series before along with Amanda. Your daughter was shout out. She's doing good to Adam speak up. Yes Golda my 11-year-old daughter loves loves loves little kids She's gotten to hang out with Glenn before and like she's just in heaven when she gets to play with little kids And so she and we had a little bit of a crisis moment We were trying to figure out how do we how do we make sure that everyone has their kids handled? Yeah, and I was like oh, I asked Golda would you want to you know come to the office and play with Glenn and she'd like flipped out It's true. It's so worked out for everybody and then my sister in law Sarah is watching our six-month-old Here I have a private detective watching my kid Who are on the east coast right now, but he keeps a safe distance and and Sonna What have you arranged for child care? What are those monsters up to well? You know, you know, we have very involved grandparent oh, I know so I went to drop my boys off at my parents house And I thought it was just gonna be my dad and it was my dad my mom and my in-laws So they heard the boys were gonna be there and they just came to the house so the boys are we got a two-to-one ratio Right now which is what you need with those kids now. Yeah. Oh my god making Charlie are I mean, they're a force to be reckoned with they are They're just non-stop. It's just like constant energy. I can't keep up anymore. I'm done. I'm gonna call it You're gonna call it. Yeah, I'm just gonna you're tapping out. I'm tapping out. I think I'm done. Okay They love you. They'll swing by occasionally They'll say hi. It's just the third reason we're going to court. Okay. All right, so what happens now? Do I have more business to to lay out here? Do we have questions to ask them? Are we going into this with a plan or are we are we doing a Summersmoor's way, baby. Yeah, man. Yeah, man. We get we've given them some content for their episode alone Figuring we're seasoned podcasting professionals like you said podcast. I think we're killing it right now. I went on a 30-minute Scottish brand Talked about how tack maybe hit a softball into Chernobyl other than that. I mean, I this is good stuff This is solid stuff. I'm gonna say this is great a chop right now chop beef get it out. Yeah, get it out Does he ever when he's striking someone with his karate hands say I chop you I chop you he does not say I chop you You've asked this before can I say something when I watch World Cup and you've seen this at word Oh you and I have watched some World Cup games together all I do is narrate the people playing and all they're saying is I kick it No, I kick it. I kick I kick I kick I kick and I'm watching with it now. I've grown to like it Yeah, and also in the balls in the air and they're doing headers like I'll No, you don't like this I do You know what if someone watches soccer with me or it's I like to call it because I'm a citizen of the world the football Um, I make all these noises and I narrate different guys and different voices saying I kick I kick now I kick I kick I kick back I kick I do that and I know later on when they're watching it alone my voice comes into their head sometimes has that Happened yet at wordo. I don't think it's happened Well, you just need more time with me more time with me. Ah the World Cup is over. Oh, don't worry They're gonna have more of these matches. No, there's no more soccer. Oh, yeah, it's all done Yeah, I'm calling what I'm calling soccer - so this is um, you know, this is a a worthy moment for our podcast We're gonna become real human figures. Not the remote Greek gods. You've known to love and I think I think fear to some degree You'll see us as flesh and blood for the first time, you know, and don't act like you're bored with my speech This is a good speech. Is it a good speech? It's a really good speech repeat. I know we just heard 10 minutes ago I looked around. I thought I'd give you another pass at it Why don't you read this speech? Oh, okay. He's handing me the rap sign right now. Okay. We're going to We're gonna wind this down, but you've got to stay tuned next week because that's when the fun Really begins tell us what's gonna happen in that episode first up. It's my wife Amanda Amanda, and would you like to give her last name? Lund. Yeah, Lund. Did she take your last name? She did legally. She took it and then threw it The dog eat some soap accidentally. It spits it out She took it for eight seconds and then went bruh A goryly came out and rattled on the floor like some rusty key chains bruh clang That's a beautiful name Not that goryly isn't a beautiful name. Oh her name. Yeah. It's much better. It is Liza. I'm gonna say this in Liza defense, she has a beautiful name, Liza Powell, and with one L, because she's come from this storied family, Philadelphia, the revolution, that, you know, she's related to like these historic figures. And, and then I was like, well, guess what? Now you're, oh, Brian. Let's throw punctuation in there. Yeah, let's throw some punctuation in there. It never comes up right on a hotel reservation. We're sorry. We don't have you here. Try there. Try out apostrophe. Nope. Our computer doesn't take apostrophe or Irish. So stay tuned because next week, Matt, a man is coming to town and we're going to find out some stuff. Oh, stay tuned. Summer spouses, summer sip, spouses on the way. It's not better. It's much better. I win. It's not more as bad. It's terrible. Quiet. You're fired. I win. Cutter. Cutting it, Mike. Three, two, one. Conan O'Brien needs a friend with Conan O'Brien, Sonom of Sessian, and Mac Gourley, produced by me, Mac Gourley, executive produced by Adam Sachs, Jeff Ross, and Nick Leo, theme song by The White Stripes, incidental music by Jimmy Vivino. Take it away, Jimmy. Our supervising producer is Aaron Blair, and our associate talent producer is Jennifer Samples. Engineering and mixing by Eduardo Perez and Brendan Burns, additional production support by Mars Melnick, talent booking by Paula Davis, Gina Batista, and Britt Conn. You can rate and review this show on Apple podcasts and you might find your review read on a future episode. Got a question for Conan? Call the team Coco Hotline at 669-587-2847 and leave a message. It, too, could be featured on a future episode. You can also get three free months of Sirius XM when you sign up at SiriusXM.com/Colon. And if you haven't already, please subscribe to Conan O'Brien, Needs a Friend, wherever fine podcasts are downloaded.