Steve Gerben Returns!

- Welcome to another exciting edition of "Are You Gobbage?" The show where you find out if your favorite comedians are classy individuals or absolute trash. Now here are your hosts, Kevin Ryan and H. Foley. - Hey everybody out there and welcome back to everybody's favorite podcast. This is "Are You Gobbage?" - Oh yeah. - It's that little show we sit down with your favorite comedians and we find that after you're to be classy. - Yeah. - They're just a big old piece of trash. - Trash trash trash. - I'm your host H. Foley coming at you on a beautiful day. We're out back here at Toadies in a new edition. Saw her wearing a neck brace. - Okay. Don't know what's going on, but I hope she's okay. - Uh huh. - Probably lawyer-in-up. - I'm sure she is. - Michael's coming in from right next to me. He is the CEO of "Are You Gobbage?" an international businessman, my best pal in the whole wide world, King of the Burbs, King of the Boards, Kevin James Ryan, everybody. - What up gang, shout out to you as always. Make sure you rate, if you subscribe, and I tune this full video available on YouTube, full video available over there on Spotify and the boys are climbing the brick-and-charts right now. - And the charts over there, Gerby. - Is that good, is that right? - Yeah, what do you mean? - Has that right? - It's a popular program. - That's fantastic. - Yeah, that's what you should be. - Obviously, the greatest website of all time, www.patreon.com/rugarbagego over there. Get all that bonus content. And we got a comedy special drop in September 13th on our YouTube channel right here. Get it? - And gang, we couldn't be more excited that we're incredibly, and I mean incredibly special. We'll guess back with us again today. One of our good pals, one of the funnest guys we know, one of the best, one of the most interesting, one of the stars and creators of Tires, season three is out right now on Netflix. Give it up for Steve Gerby. - All right, thank you, thank you for having me back. - Has an artichoke pizza on its way, ladies and gentlemen. - Yes, first time ever. - What's that? - A first time ever in the studio. - Well, 'cause I wanted to time it out, and I don't wanna not eat it. - Okay, listen, what is your first temperature on that? That's like, what a rapper would do. Like, hey, I'm coming in by the way I'm getting some pizza. - I gotta be honest, it just gives me more respect for him, Gerby's moves the way he moves and it's fantastic. - He does. - His own pace. - For anybody unfamiliar, I guess that's the camera, I'm looking at it. I just scanned his five cameras. - Where's my close up? - There's a, I guess, so there's a pizza place in Manhattan called Artichoke, and they make this white pizza that is-- - Artichoke pizza. - Is that what it is? I don't even know what I'm eating. (laughing) - It's for college shicks on the weekend, and he's that and throw it up. No one gets it at noon on a Wednesday. - Yeah, it is a journey. - That's a Gerby move. - It's a drunk slice. - Is it? - Yeah, I think, I don't think it started as that. I think it was like a good, artisanal zah, and then they've opened up more locations and like, there's one on Bleaker Street or McDougal Street. - Yeah, I could never eat it 'cause we see it thrown up on the side. (laughing) - Well, I mean, we're gonna try it. - Yeah, no, for sure, I'm in. How did you, so he comes in and goes, "Hey, by the way, there's pizza can't deliver to 12.50." It's noon right now, so that's, and we run an hour, so that's perfect. - Sure. - Which I said, did you get a whole pie? And he said, "Yes." And I was like, "You're gonna take it home?" And he's like, "No, maybe we'll all eat it." But I know that's not true. (laughing) You're bringing that back to a certain person. - No, if I was bringing it back to a certain person, it would be me. (laughing) - I'll get you to know. - Yeah, I mean, maybe I'll take a slice home, but it is incredibly filling. And, you know, it's not gonna want to eat more than one. - Right, I don't have like one and a half maybe one later, but then, you know, it's just too much. - Yeah, well, I think it's a very sweet. I mean, sometimes people have come in and be like, "Oh, there's pastries, or here's this, or whatever." So I, you know, I think it's a very, very nice move. - Oh, okay. - When I go to Delaware, I get a grotto pizza and bring that back. - Is that right? - Yeah, you know, grotto pizza? - No. (laughing) - No, it stinks. I'm an art teacher, man. - Everybody knows that about garbage. All right, this is, I think a very good way to start off. You're coming here, you're a guest here, you're bringing a gift. Let's say you were coming, oh, you were coming, I was having a dinner party. - He wasn't bringing a gift. - You got enough for everybody. - That's what I bring home, Kevin. I think you can only order a large pizza. - I know, you could have stopped and got a slice, or you could have went afterward. Fair enough, fair enough. But I, it's just sifting this out, correct? - Yeah, it's really hard to move this. - I was trying to be nice to the guy, all right. I think it only has to be to go and move and I respect it. - Well, it's creepy about it. - I'm joking. - I can't, I can't. - He's bringing Artichoke Pika back to his friend. Back to his lady. - Totally, I'm not. - I don't, yeah, I don't, I mean. - Yeah. - I would, if she, I'm not. - He's busted cold. (laughing) - They do slices. - They do? - Yeah. - I'm surprised. - He's broad enough for the class. - That's all I'm saying is he's bringing, he's brought, maybe, listen, there's a buy product of him, of having to order a pie, which we apparently, you do not have to, is pizza for the class, which I think is a nice move. That's awesome. - And we appreciate it. - Great. (laughing) - Now I feel my pizza invitation was just invoked if I may not, although I agree with ya. What, if you were going over someone's house for dinner, right, someone invited you over, maybe, just single couple, whatever. Are you showing up empty handed? Are you showing up with something? - Typically empty handed. (laughing) - Yeah. - Which we learned is the smart move from the etiquette specialist. You don't bring wine 'cause you don't know what they're serving. You don't bring dessert for the sake of rule. - Was that a rule? - Yeah. She said bring flowers or champagne. - But that's not empty handed. - No, I know. - Okay. - But don't bring the typical stuff or bring nothing is what she said. That was the first thing she said. And if you're gonna bring something, bring flowers or champagne. Or artichoke pizza. (laughing) - That's actually, yeah, flowers or champagne. - That sounds, have you ever done that? - No. - No, you've never done that. - Neither have I. - Do you do a lot of dinner parties? - Of course not. - See, I could have saw that maybe. - Yeah, right? - Really? - Yeah. - You got the country club friends, you know? - You're a suburban baby. - Yeah, no, that is a, that's a transactional. Most, I mean, not that I don't really like some of the guy, I really like something, but there's no dinner parties going on. - Okay, yeah. - I'm not a dinner party guy. That would sort of, I don't like to eat and talk. - We had to show up to a podcast with a pizza, then. (laughing) - I mean, eat it afterwards. I will watch you eat it. And I will go, right? That's, I'm gonna eat it, but-- - It's good, right? - Yeah, I'm gonna go, mm, I'm spitting it out. - That's funny. - Do you ever, but I feel like, you know, you're eating, first of all, and, you know, it's like I eat disgusting. So I have this problem where I eat-- - I pack. - Yeah, I pack my cheeks like a chipmunk. - Yeah, me too. - You do it? - I chew with my mouth open, and I get yelled out loud. (laughing) - I mean, I'm a slob, I spit stuff. - Yeah, and it's like, you know, we're too old to, I've tried to just put small portions in my mouth and swallow them, and I, then I start thinking about-- - Look even weirder. - Yes. - And it just feels, it's like really small. - Yeah, and it throws off my rhythm, I-- - I think, when people, when I try to think about slowing down and not putting so, it's like, then that's all I'm thinking about. I'm going, how long have I been chewing, is this too much? And then I'm going, I'm so out of it. This is so not enjoyable. - Like the way Europeans eat. Very slow. - Yeah, my wife stinks. - A dinner party I could do once or twice. That's performative. You gotta go in there and work the table and shit. But to do that all the time, I don't know how people do it. No, me neither. - Yeah, and I wouldn't think with the boys, but maybe outside friends in the neighborhood or whatever. So you don't mix and mingle with any of them? - No, I like eating over a sink, standing up just-- - Right on the, this guy's moving. That's got a lot going on. - Yeah. - But the kids in the neighborhood know you, you said they cut through your yard. - Yeah. - All right, yeah. - I'm not gonna have a dinner party with guests. (laughing) - Why did you move? - That's Old Man Gurbans, please. - No, no. - That's funny. - Okay. Are you doing coffee in the morning? Can't back you as a coffee guy. - Oh, you bet wrong. - Wow. - Big time coffee guy. - Big time coffee. - Makes it at the house. - Yeah. - Holy 20 coffee guy now, high class, I guess you'd say. Hit me. - Nespresso machine. - Love it. - I kept saying-- - I wanna switch. - Yeah, we've been talking about that since LA. - Really? - 'Cause I said, you know I'm a trip guy and I, this is, you don't need to be spending the money and then every time I'd run out of the pods, I'd go, let me just give one more round of pot. And now I said, that's it. - I'm spending the money. - It's superior to a caric, for sure. - I suppose. - Well, I think the idea is that it runs through metal. There's more metal than plastic. It carries very plastic. There's this new thing I wanna try these frozen pellets. - Okay. - And you pour hot water of 'em and that makes, it's supposed to be supposedly the best. At least that's what Instagram tells me. - None of us has seen them. We think Kevin's crazy. (laughing) - I am slightly losing my mind. - Yeah. But yes, morning coffee guy that, you know, little hazelnut cream and then-- - A poop. - Gentlemen. - Also oatmeal. - Oh, I haven't thought that oatmeal a while. - Really? - Really disgusting. Or so I've been told breakfast. - I do peas and rice. - Yeah. - Moths' real cheese egg. - What are you, a sick dog? - That's crazy. - You're a kid. (laughing) - Peas and rice. - Wait, start over. And how did that, okay. You're making peas in the morning? Are they're made in-- - They're frozen peas. - But you're heating 'em up. - Yeah. - In a pot or the microwave. - In a pan. - You're heating frozen peas. You put water in there. - Hot water in there? - You're sauteing it. - Is the rice already done? - We gotta slow down with the question. - The rice. - They do the process. - All right, so the rice gets made once every four days, let's say. - Okay. - Okay, so, boom. Pan, a little bit of oil. Frozen peas, the rice. - Okay. - Stirring a little bit until it heats up. Two eggs, egg whites. - Oh, eggs, all right. - Yeah, and then moths' real cheese. And then we're just mixing and doing what have you. - Like a fried rice almost. - Yeah. And yeah, I don't hate it. It's more of a whole. That's that is just slightly Yeah, it's definitely he lead he led with peas if you want I do I do I do rags and rice and you didn't mention the exit first I thought I did, but what's wrong with peas? That's the that's been the sticking piece Peace is not a breakfast food. What time do you eat breakfast? Good point? It could be new if it's new. Oh It's people I think people if it's all a little off putting the people because if you remember peas in the morning I'm sure I have probably at some point, but it's not on a menu at I hop you can't go Oh, and I'll do the bake I want to sub the bacon for a side of peas no one's ever said that fair enough Uh-huh, but but it makes the cooking process easy sure why is that? Because I feel like you know if we're talking about the frosting broccoli, it's like we're gonna be here I don't know he went with another he went with another green protein, which which like I thought he was gonna go bake in who wasn't a mess It's like sure It's got time for Pat get some veg in there. Uh-huh. It's where we love you. Yeah, very unique I dig it liked an espresso move plus Clooney backs it. Is that right? Did you know you didn't know that? I think I did know that That's one of the reasons why I like it feel like Clooney I'm drinking a character we did it because we we've been curing guys, but then we got to the house We stayed in the lay had it and we had no no choice but to Empire man by the second or third day we were all like I like the one with a little Are used in the purple because there was like an assortment. We're like using a purple one using a green one Try the try the gold. We were all over it. Yes That's it. We're getting one for any one criticism was it doesn't get hot that doesn't stay that hot Interesting. Yeah, I didn't notice it. So I I drink mine with a silicone straw because my teeth absorb the coffee like nobody's business And I kind of just I get it in me just suck it in more than That makes the peas even weird It's just so silicon's up close to the straw as well Got you how many of those straws do you have? I got an assortment assortment. Yeah, you don't got a metal one I but I know not the metal ones because the Bite a little softer. Yes softer on the two. Yeah, good teeth though. Thank you Are you been told that your teeth absorb the coffee more so than an normal person? No, they if like you know I go for a dental cleaning and I drink coffee regularly. I'll get a line on my teeth Just this is what it is is a very calculated guy. Yeah. Yeah, how often do you go to the dentist once every or twice a year really? Yeah, as long as I'm gonna dentist kippy Luke, I actually my mom paid for one for like six months ago They just texted me again. You don't have dental. We got it now. It was before that kicked in you got dental the fuck of my paint Yeah, you're that kids got dental. We're doing all right over. Yeah, let's paint you up that complicit Okay, congrats on season three. Obviously. Yes. Thank you very much. I congrats to you in it I know you haven't seen it yet. Thank you for having me. You are so good. Oh stop and we're so lucky to have you chain text of me how funny you are and Dude you're gonna like I don't know. I don't want to but you're gonna love it. I think you know, I saw bits of pieces. I'm of course I'm gonna love it. Yeah, the first two episodes we saw at the premiere blew me away. Oh, that's all The world the way everything tied in together the beats. I mean that place was popping bang bang bang Yeah, that's McEver. Yeah, yeah, he is just Doing what we all knew he could do and it's so cool. Yeah, but to do that John is a genius for sure Yeah, you wouldn't chain your relationship and those characters have really solidified and come together and are so Perfect with each other very odd couple as it feels great. Yeah, it's good stuff. Yeah us Very excited for everybody see it. Yeah, yeah Great great things from everybody involved talking to everybody's like it's fucking. It's a home run awesome Huh all that aside. Yes You're gonna find out if you're a dirtbag or not, sure P's in the morning. P's in the morning's a top. I've never heard that what appliances are on the kitchen counter right now Got the Nispresso. Do you have a toaster a micro? What's on the counter? Don't even completely crazy with that I don't keep anything on the counter The Nispresso is like in the I have like a tiny little table in the laundry room I just keep it there. You keep the coffee machine in the laundry room. Yeah What else is in the laundry room? It's like a doctor's office There's a microwave over there What? No one stops at the coffee urban It makes sense when you see it You know what I put my socks in there how much of my honestly microwaving sure this you know this thing that I don't think looks great I just put it in there and then I said, well you know this room for the Nispresso and so now I just have like a psycho's kitchen That's just empty pretty much, but that's the style these things keep it clean. Yeah, is it minimalistic? I respect that the microwave in the laundry room. Yeah, huh Restaurant style back at the house. I'll show you a picture. I'll send you a picture. I don't think it's weird It's I mean it's gonna have to be how many steps from the kitchen great question Three Eight that's already far now eight eight It's sort of like kitchen dining table laundry room. Is that a nice laundry room? No How old's washer and dryer? I wash your dryers like five years old. Okay. Yeah, are they stacked or next to each that it's an organized laundry room It's not like you know the kind that smells differently than the rest of the house. Mm-hmm. Smells like coffee Is there a bathtub sink in there? What are they called stationary stationery? There is a half bath in there Yeah, wait a half bath in the laundry room. Yeah, with walls around it There's a toilet in a sink Is there is it separated by a door in the lawn? So I walk into the laundry room. Yes, and then there is a door grab a cup of coffee Yeah, I'd grab a cup of coffee. Yeah, eat up some leftover art joke pizza. That's right And then there's another door to get to the bathroom where it's all in one room correct. There's another door Is that lead to a garage? There's another door to the garage. It's somewhat of a larger laundry room There's more like a mud room maybe mud room. Mudroom would be a better way to do it. Yeah, mudroom with a micro Violence or mud room. It's my grave my cat tree, you know There's a whole set up. Where are there shoes in there? No, I keep my shoes in the garage before you go. Yeah Is there a rack or they just like is there a pile of shoes? How many how what what what's that there is a rack and then there are auxiliary issues What if you go through the front door which I've only ever seen you use? I ran it. That's only been a couple of times. Yeah, it just like kick them off forever. Okay. All right, Garben Squirrely from the outside the house looks normal. Thank you, but then you go and I imagine will you want to lose there? No, it's I respect it. You got you know, I can see in the bay window your chair. You got your chair. Yeah Do I yeah look a lot of look at oh? What really yeah, they changed out my entire living room to look like a different living room. Oh, I didn't you filmed in there. Yeah, that's a little extra paycheck for gerbys Smart man. I like to hear it spread that around spread around Do you have an electric toothbrush of course? Do you ever use it when it's not charged? Yes, okay? Great question. Mm-hmm What I'm surprised God it would have by the way my favorite things you guys did and I keep I go back and rewatch I still can't figure out the wording, but it's about a gatorade Mmm-hmm. What's your favorite? Yeah, you said the color. You know classy, but you said the color of trash Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's it. That's like one of the first. That's like such an indicator. It's so funny Here we have a key in a rock. You know the fake rock no one up What was the last time you were on a boat? I would love to be on a boat Go to a couple dinner parties you might get invited. Yeah, yeah, can you remember the last time? Can I remember that it was probably a ferry? I would have to assume you were like going you're like crossing the channel or something Yeah, what ferry would you be taking? Oh? Yeah, maybe no Liberty stand Island ferry statue or what is that you live? Huh boat? Okay, you saw the statue of Liberty recently. No No, that's why I can't remember I have actually have you yeah, I went like to you last year two years ago Oh, does it? It's fine. Okay. It's crazy. Oh, what's it like? Yeah, yeah, you just zip I didn't go there. Okay, I'm not an asshole. You just zip by it No, so you didn't go I'm not going to the Statue of Liberty. So you don't really go you drove by it. Yeah, very misleading Hey, I'm not on trial. It's a lot of love being told at this table. This guy's microwave and stuff in his bathroom slash laundry room Where he keeps his shoes or all your screens intact in the house anything ripped the screens in a window They're intact Do you change those every season the storm windows to the screens? No No storm windows. I don't believe so. You think about getting some save on heating. Okay. Kippy done. I don't Very important this episode is sponsored by better health. Yes. As everybody knows, Kippie and I are well on our mental health journey. And where do we start? Better health. That's right. Better health, comfort of your own home, fraction of the cost. If you don't have a specialist in your town, you get them on there. If you got something going on, bigger, small, do yourself a favor, talk therapy works. Yeah, we've talked about it for a long time. You know, listen, you can go to betterhelp.com/reviews and see the amazing customer reviews they have in real time. 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Visit betterhelp.com/garbage. That's better help. H-E-L-P.com/garbage. Do it. I don't think we did this. Correct me if I'm wrong. Who was the most famous person you met growing up? I think it was like Dave, something or other from AccuWeather. Dave Thomas. Dave Thomas. Dave hurricane Schwartz. No, Dave, something. Yeah, but I think that was it. I think it was Dave Thomas. Good looking guy. Kind of with the blonde hair slick back. I was incredibly young. I don't. Yeah. Dave Donbeck. No, that's not. Action news, Philly. Dave. I think it's Thomas. No, that's the Wendy's guy. Yeah. Well, it wasn't Jim Gardner. So it doesn't really count. Certainly it was not Jim Gardner. Jim Gardner, Vernon Odom, and Dave Roberts. Dave Roberts! I grew up near him. I think I went to school with his daughters. No shit. Those people make a lot of cash. That's his little Tyson's cake dub. I'm a bicycle. I'm a bicycle. Me too. I feel like he's doing another show in Jackson. These guys are good. I just love language like that. Like I learned about dog walking somebody. What's that? Oh, you don't know that? It's like if you beat somebody really bad, it's like fucking dogwalk. Yeah, you got dogwalk. Never heard that one. It's one off to start using that. Like it's my own around the younger crowd. Yes. Oh, opt. These last time you stole. I don't think I've ever stolen. See that? Yeah. I knew that good guy. Derby's don't steal. I mean, let's see. Yep. You know, maybe something from Amazon. I got a pair of shoes from Amazon. And then they said, Somebody's porch? No, porch pirate. But you know, it's like one of those. I didn't get them. So they refunded me the money. And then I got them. That's all fair and loved. That's how they operate, which is crazy. Yeah, I like how that hangs, you know, himorally he felt like this is a little dirt. This isn't, you know, but I respect it. Have you ever clap on a plane landed? Probably. Really? Doesn't like the fly. No, I think I'm getting better. That's good. Yeah. Any vacations since the last time we saw you? No. You haven't gone anywhere. No. You play golf? Yeah. That's like a vacation. Yeah. No. Have you tried to go play golf? No. You really just play your course. And then yeah, if there's like ones in the area or something, yeah. What's the last time you was here, like six months ago? Yeah, it was your last. You haven't got any vacation. No, where am I going? I don't know the beach. I went to the, I mean, I went to the beach for a day. Where? Not the Margate. Very nice. Drove down and drove back. Yeah, it's trash. What? It's sandy. That's crazy. It's crazy. It's real. A wet bathing suit on the AC expressway. One of those guys. That's a rash waiting to happen at the end of the beach putting your shoes on. But we just went to we just went to Charleston for the premiere. That's work. That's. I'll give you that. So did you stay for a couple of extra days? Would you leave on Sunday? I left the media. He said he left first thing Sunday. And he had pizza. He didn't even go out to eat down there. We went out to eat. That's a restaurant city. Did you go to Fort Sumner? No. Well, you know, I got a lot going. Okay. I think you're doing a nice vacation. What would it? Is there anywhere you would want to go? No, no. Where should I go? I don't know. What do I like to do? Golf. Okay. I mean like the Carolinas are great for all springs. Fair enough. But then it's like, I'm surprised like no golf trip. Because that's big now. Like, you know, and you see guy, yeah, a bunch of a bunch of guy. Yeah, going on. Yeah, not even that. I mean, you go, Pinehurst is down inside. Don't play Pinehurst. You got to carry those clubs down. I can't imagine. Exactly. And you look like an idiot walking through the airport. Yeah. I don't know. I listen. I'm not to convention. I want. Okay. I wish I was the type of person that wanted to travel. I have the type of brain currently. Maybe that'll change as I get better at flying. That right wants to see other stuff. But every time I go somewhere new, I just go, I don't care. I get it. Yeah. Okay. I'll give you that. You do a road trip. You like driving? No. Sorry. I need me to be that aggressive. I like it. I love it. It needs to be slapped around a little bit. Okay. I have a question. Maybe not an artichoke pizza because it's creamy. But say you got a regular pizza delivered to the house. You don't finish it. You're going to have it the next day. Do you put it in the fridge or do you put it in the oven in the box and let it sit overnight? Fridge. Real. Yeah. Take it out of the box. Yeah. Put it in tin foil. Wait, I'm crazy. That's crazy that you thought he would not do that. You thought he would leave. But you're on the same page as me. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah. For sure. We didn't really just leave it in the box. Yeah. It's fine. It's going to be good. You can have a cold in the morning. It's a, it becomes a different product. Sure. Interesting. I'm not, listen, I'm not for it, but it happens. And it's fine. Why don't you take it out of the box and put it in tin foil. It gets weird when it's like two slices. That's my mom's move. Yeah. Hate it. But you got to refrigerate it slow down bacteria. Yeah. You're rolling the dice a little bit. Yeah. But there's nothing in me that can't handle it. It's in the oven. Totally agree. It's like there's flies in anything. Yeah. Maybe I'll live on the edge a little bit. No, you won't. No. Now I'm just trying to fit in with you guys. I'm trying to seem like a hard day as a friend of my friends. Yeah. Do you still own any DVD? I'm just checking. It looks like there's some issue at the pizza parlour. They're waiting for the order. There we go. Waiting for the order. I do not own DVDs. No DVDs. No. Any collection of any, like, is there anything you're, you feel you're not even a collection. Yeah. I acquired this. I feel really stupid. But there was this one toy that I had growing up that it's called like a rumble rock rumble and roll or something. It was like a little truck. Okay. Rumble rock truck. Anyway, you would like pull the pull a little string and it would start the ignition. Rumble rock and roll. Sounds familiar. Yeah. Or something like that. And I'm getting the wording wrong. I could look it up for you actually because then I did there was there was three that they offered. Is it the van? I just freaked out. So I had the red truck and then I ordered the van and I'm thinking about ordering the blue Jeep just to complete the collection. Did you have the whole set when you were a kid? Yeah. I only had the red one. I gotta be honest, a bunch of vibrators are coming up when you put rumble and roll toy. Flex and bend. The rumble rumble do a rumble rumble want. That was that was one thing. I thought let me get it on eBay. Yeah. Yeah. Well, that sent you back. It was like $90. Okay. Yeah. That's good. Yeah. That's a nice minute condition. It was it was misleading. They said it was stupid like cover of it came off. So I look it up or yeah. Go forward. Of course. I'd love to get eyes on it. I can multitask. Yeah. Do you show it? Like is it out? Like on a shelf? It is displayed. It's displayed. It's displayed with other like figurines for my child. Where at? On a bookshelf in the living room. The den. Yes. In the den. The den. Is that different from the living room? I think so. Do you step down into the den by any chance? No. Is there a TV in there? Yes. Is there a TV in the living room? No. Really? That's old school of yeah. That's why I can then a gerby. Buy it again. Oh, buy it. Oh, yeah. Here's a couple shirts that did work out. Off eBay. Off eBay. Rock and rollers. Tommy rip rock and rollers. Monster truck. I never heard of it. Was this in the 90s? Yeah. Or in 1988. Sorry. The 80s. Okay. Let's see. Oh, yeah. I remember I remember that specifically. The package. Yeah. Rip rock and rollers. I remember that. Yeah. What one is it? What color? Well, so the only one that I don't have right now is the blue Jeep. I didn't know you acquired multiple. Well, I had the red ones this challenge. Acquired the you kept that one all the way through. Yeah. I just it's something about that toy. I loved it. That's really cool. What do you said other? Not trinkets I forget the other word what figurine. You mean action figures no like it eagles like what were those? You know, oh, I know what you're talking about now not the bobble head what the fuck would they come in the little like like major leagues or something like People would collect them the box with the clear plastic in the front. You know we're talking about I know they were like in position Yes, yeah, so I got Reggie White and Jerome Brown great ones. Yeah, great one. I don't remember. They had a specific name. You got anything Luke? That's gonna be probably a tough one to get now. They were huge interesting Display you ever play with it? No Garbin no, I mean when like my nephew, you know like for the toys. Yeah, but No, nothing. Oh, you know what I did get recently as a pellet gun Really had one growing up. Yeah, yeah, and talked about so and I just got it's yeah, what are you doing with it shooting cans, but now I just bought like a target In the backyard. Yeah, it's actually very fun to do. Is there any is there a house behind you or no? No, okay. Yeah, that's safety first Would you ever shoot a squirrel or a round hog or anything like that? Even if they were what about a possum? No, no, no, no, scum possums. No wolf absolutely not no possum You could get it. No, it can't. I don't think they're the sweetest. What possums? No, look at possums They take they like they're great animals and they don't attack people. They just make a crazy face if you pick them up Yeah, they look weird. Yeah, yeah, yeah, with that. No thanks. Hmm. Ah Have you ever gone to a high school reunion? No, no plans either. That's not your cup of tea. Okay. What high school did you go to? Constega kind of still go. Can we check a no he says it sounds like I'm fact check it We do we find out if you're on the notable alum on Wikipedia do you know if you are? Oh, I may be because my friend Dan listened to this last time And then went there to try and add I think there we go What was the last time you went to a trivia? See if Dan's got any swag. He's gerbin. Let's go Actor-producer writer right below Todd glass. Ah, you want to go with time glass the same high school ass. Oh, yeah trivia night trivia night was oh, yeah, probably not too long ago. Probably really. Yeah, that you'll do socially Yeah, cuz well, so this my girlfriend at the time I played with her and her friend and I won the You know funniest name of the night thing, which was what? Nancy Pelosi's big fat It's because it was like when that Teddy pick her came out and then I was in the the bathroom. I thought it was going to be clever That's good. Yeah, are you good at trivia? Horrible But that's something you do socially that heavy lifting. I will do it socially. Yeah, it's not I don't seek it out to do it Yeah, with the ladies friends, I think I'd rather blow my brains out I enjoy a good quiz though. We always have how you play a couple it's just the reason to get drunk on a Tuesday the bird usually drink Specials you go there. It's like dollar beaters. I don't like the people to tracks. Well, who was it? What type of people Guys that he pees for breakfast Nancy Pelosi's big fat. That's when you watch TV. Do you have the close captioning on? I do I try to turn it off everybody that I've watched it with always seems to want it on Interesting. Yeah. Kevin, how do you feel about that? My wife is English is like a language. So I'm just I it's on now all the time. Very sorry. I just have to live with it Have you ever want to chain wallet? Sure, definitely really yeah, here's we talking Probably early 90s. That was your style It was yeah, I did it as well for a little bit. Yeah, yeah, it's probably something I bought at the beach Then I had a zip a lighter. I would be like, you know, you come back with trinkets. Did you smoke? No, you just had a zip one Yeah, they were big. Yeah, early night branding was fucking they must have got an influx of private equity Yeah, they did come back. You learn to like snap it open What beach did you grow up going to ocean city chat up to it chatterbox? What's that? You don't know the chatterbox? No I don't think I'll place you dance in the 1950s the chatterbox. It's a famous diner in ocean city. Oh, they don't serve peas there fair enough Well you send a Venmo request if someone owes you money. No Okay, who's gonna own money? I don't know if you'll play around the golf or somebody like I got it just Venmo me. Yeah, no, would you just pick it up? Ask about it. Yes, huh? Yep. What's the last thing we picked up dinner picked up dinner pick like picking up a long trip I mean if you go to dinner usually picking up to check how many people are we talking? What is it? Is everybody bringing the girlfriends? What's happening? Another couple another couple? Yeah, sure Does it depend on you? I have not been known. Well, I haven't done a couple date and frankly I would really Heels in the mud about doing it about going on the date. Yeah, yeah, you don't like a double date. Don't like a double What if you knew both of the other couple? Yeah, then that's never the case though What's that did no in both of them? I feel like I feel like it would be rare. Yeah, we're going with Laurie and her husband You remember him right right stinks. Whoever he is All right I obviously is there any faux pas on the golf course that really take you off slow play slow play. Mm-hmm. That's it We uh, we uh, we uh, we have a comment if you're we uh, we a play through Well, I mean if if offered but I might I Might gesture in a way. What's that look like? I know I don't know the four arm flap, but if I go like my hands like that Wait, do it again. I'm so proud of T to the green So they're in the fairway And you're on the tea box. Yeah, they might have my head up a little bit, you know, sort of that's not enough I'm not gonna go for our flat. I'm not gonna do confrontational. What's considered slow peg Luke? You got it you got to be keeping up with the guys Very you know when you see it. Yeah, what'd you complain to the starter? No, I would I I was in the group. I would be like We can play should we Hey listen, I think these guys I did the head nod twice. They didn't pick up on it. I think it's intentional. I'm on TV an upset Is there someone that can help me? Is my assistant here? That's great. Okay. We are you the kind of guy? Well if you see a tea and like the tea box, will you pick it up and keep it? If I need it if you need it. Yeah, what about balls? Will you take balls? You sure really? Yeah, cuz I have a little like a shag bag at home bucket of balls Yes, huh just to like chip around out back and I think it animals taking some of them. It's I got the impossible Okay, do you have the thing you have the shag bag to pick the balls? I do that's really that's I knew a guy who had that my mom's balls had that at one point Do you have the super long stick where you can get the balls out of the water? No, okay. Yeah, I wanted to get that night I was told explicitly tell us go pick their back ball They're still good. Yeah, that was I worked at a country and that was I would just steal the range bowl I mean we they would they they pull the the lake or whatever Yeah, once in a while they would do it. Yeah, yeah, two times a season or whatever and then I would just I had a trunk full of just stolen range Which which which North Hampton Country Club, okay in a box County, Pennsylvania All right, I was always petrified of the pond on the golf course Yeah, it's something in there really I don't know just looks murky. I would go in that shit. It's just Gusha It is true. Yeah, it's enough to keep me away That's it. I'm done if you went to a diner and they had mince out front how many mince do you think are acceptable to take Before it's too much. He's not touching them. I could see him. I could tie the red and white ones. I could see him for sure Not the old the rat ones. Yeah, yeah, they're rat. I would here's it. I would say one per person And then maybe you know what extra just Having your pocket. Yeah, very good. Great. You have a big business meeting. Come on. You take a toothpick If they offer him sure I get food wedged in there Rapidly The word choice wedged in there rapid is like I love it. Let's say it's rhythmic We just I this has to be no will you send food back in a no no matter what no matter what I mean if it's a totally different order Sure, I think there's a miscommunication. I didn't fucking order this Get back there and get your shit together. Okay Will you point at a menu for order and like I'll do the chicken parmesan almost always almost always But it's the last time we go to restaurant Not never no no I do uh Westchester Pennsylvania is great restaurants Go out to dinner. Yeah with one other person or maybe yourself. Yeah, go by yourself like a date like a date Do you eat by yourself? No, I wouldn't go to a restaurant by myself. I respect that. Yeah. Yeah, thank you. I think it's weird to you never Yeah, never do you never could do that? Yeah, yeah, no, I don't Only time I ever do it as an airport if I'm like killing time by myself. I'm traveling sure something I always feel like a detective or something like that. It's just weird. I Don't I never I wouldn't know what to do where to look. Yes, I wouldn't know I just got my hair cut and I had it every time she let it. She like look down See if it was like even I would close on panic and close my eye. I wouldn't know what to do Yeah, leave the menu. Please. Yeah, just too much. Yeah Have you I'm sorry. What was the last book you read? Oh, boy. It's it's probably just like a golf instructional book I'm an idiot. I haven't read a book. You don't read not anymore. Yeah, I know I just I ordered Norwegian wood and read like a page of it and said that's a book that was a Beatles song No, it's I think it is and also a book. What's it about? I don't even know is it fiction? It is What are you watching on TV them? I feel like it's a black and white TV. It's not I'm just saying it's not as old It's all upset So door dash He's approaching. Oh my god Who knows what that name is anyway, so it ain't Gary So I watch a lot of YouTube golf. Okay, who do you like the Brian bros? Okay, Grant Horvath shot I know Grant. Do you put it on the TV? I don't know You know, Graham. Yeah, I don't do you probably get on one of them channels. I've been tried They've got a lot of DMs for well they eat at a DM for me, but I haven't heard anything back, but get your people on that I've tried Yeah, I know. I'll get you on there. Will you now try I mean jean what the fuck am I doing? Yeah, I know But yeah, they have I just the three of them together are fantastic and anyway outside of that maybe a movie or what nothing you should see it You should see their fire they do they have great fire. It's just I don't know. I've got a I've got to give a better review But I love them. That's great. Yeah, good golf content. Yeah. All right. Yeah, but he's doing his thing urban's Garibon Hmm What's the last time we were at a garage sale? As a child Okay, see I could see him no Ziggs when he should. Yeah, that's a name. Well, if you're a garage sale guy go it like the awkward conversation I don't like being watched when I'm looking at stuff You like looking I don't be I don't like being looked at yeah, I could see it I can understand you're not being the pellet gun you live alone in the house The microwaves in the larger room. Yeah, yeah, I could see a garage sale or a storage auction Interesting hmm, but uh, let's say you're at a urinal do you unzip unbuttoned unzip or do you go over the top? I think I unbuttoned unzip. I have to yeah, yeah nice unit on it No, no, I don't have a nice penis, but I do have to I can't go in through the zipper. No, that's not easy Yeah, you need more defense. Yeah, no, I don't know anyone doing right. What's the point of them dude? I was I was paying next to my my boy's dad. We run a bar and he had shorts on and he went Through the bottom of my shorts. I just got a hog on it. What the shit is even that through the bottom? God damn wow I can't do that. I can't unbuttoned unzip because I'm scared my pants will fall down Hey, I just keep my belt Done and I go over to top rope interesting. Yeah My belts are heavy and I'll drag my jeans right to the ground Like it's like an anchor and I don't want to underwear so then I'm the fact I would just pants down and think what a urinal Not a good look. I have a narrow urethra so And I would have done peeing. I have to get Some urine out and the way to get it out is to like Yeah, trust a little bit. You got thrust or like compress the head of the penis Which with your hand. Yeah, wait, so you squeezed do you go? I do you like like that? What's the motion? The motion is you gotta make sure nobody sees you doing this The problem, but ideally it's either you could apply pressure to Just prostate. Yes And you know what? No, okay, so then no, I thought the prostate was something at least do it in a dog will Rundle so yeah, you mean the taint. Yes You apply a little pressure there. There's got to be one person that's seen this online you have I have you do like Yeah, you can on the golf channel I embrace yeah, but don't they're very fairly friendly. We can't make say don't be close. I swear it's my bed You just wrote it. It's not these spiral when I'm at home. What is this undiagnosed the narrow urethra? It is definitely self-prescribed. Yeah, I haven't talked to me to be your prostate. You can't check that out really have your prostate check No, haven't how did you land on narrow urethra? I think I googled it Yeah, that is a odd Man, that's a urban right because if I don't yeah, well So okay, so you you get you got to clear out the pipes a little bit more otherwise what it dribbles? Yeah, it'll then you know two seconds later when I put my pants just like I'll piss my pants not piss I understand damn that's hardcore Just gonna check and see what he's up to oh Details of your no contact It was dropped off. Sure. Sure The pizza is in the building. We got it. Yeah, that's so exciting. I you know because when I was in the car He's never he's doing so much. Yeah, it's just a work. I said see what do you mean? You know like is it gonna create a lot of confusion or are people gonna have to you know You know, let's just you know what you mean within the studio. Yeah or New York City. It's a hole It's been a topic of conversation No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no problem. Maybe he's trying to be man. Derbing gridlocks, New York holy shit this guy ordered a pizza Okay, I mean Okay, so pants down pants you you on button that you do the whole night. Yes I I've realized when if I do go over the top and I don't clear the pipes completely that is more I don't know if there's like a kink or something with the top of the paint. Mm-hmm, but that prevents the final there's more Trip there's more drip-age if I go over the top interesting. I've just started to accept that. Okay. I got pee in my jeans Not my worst prop. You don't like at home You won't use a little bit of toilet paper and dab and then no, I'm even worse at home I've realized over the years. I thought it was my fatness, but I've been told recently that I Stand too far away from the toilet to pee and I always get pee on the floor. No, no Wait, I've seen it. Not bad. No, I don't know what it is. I stand too far away. Definitely no clean up there Oh, you gotta it's gotta clean it up and sometimes I'll just pee in the shower. Even if I'm not sure of course No, even if I'm not in the shower. Oh interesting. Yeah. Oh, do you run water? Sometimes that's us. Oh, no hotel Hotel. Yeah I would run some water. Yeah, fair enough. Yeah He's this garbage That's the question, you know, he's he's a specific kind of guy. Do you have a cleaning lady? I do now Okay, we talked about that last time. Yeah, I do now. Do you clean in between? What's the time you're in the vacuum? I do I I have a Dyson that I sorry They are but I'll Dyson occasionally. Okay cat hair. How many cats do you have one it's an outdoor cat? No, it's a both She's she has like an indoor outdoor space, but she can't roam around. It's all caged in. Yeah, you built this thing for her Well, no, she she just not go over the fence. She just doesn't climb out of it. So I just have like a normal person fence. Really? Yeah A normal person face. Yeah, is it D Claude? No, okay. No, you wouldn't do that. No, I agree. How do you feel about avocados? I could get in on them Do you keep them at the house? I don't they got to be just soft and not too soft not too hard They got to be a little bit a little bit of give to them. Okay. There was a place in Philly that used to put them in like a breakfast burrito Delicious, they do it all over the world. I like how he was like dude. You'll never know what this Mexican restaurant did That's not she'd said a piece. I'll get because they had potato and then peppers who did this burrito? Yeah, yeah That's no one shot in Philadelphia. Yeah, that's really you asked for pieces that we use. No, no I didn't ask for peace. No, that could you have a cato in the morning. Yeah All right stick with your piece you like peas do but you know changed up a little bit. I do love cheese and potato Red blood of the American right what I don't know what to tell you. Yeah, but you said you put rice. There's no potato No, it's just on the fly. I'm thinking about adding given the avocado conversation and now maybe a new dish This is a whole second dish. We had you would do avocado rice. No He would lose the rice lose the rice. You made it for the week What you made it for the week. Oh, yeah, we'll have to do something else with it Yeah, you know they say that's good for you when you make it and refrigerate it good It does something to the starch or something like that. I don't know how I've been doing that heavy I said it last week. I'm pretty heavy on cold baked potatoes at the moment really yeah I respect that uh-huh will you eat anything cold out of the fridge? There's a gotta be heated up pretty much got to be heated up. I'm trying to think Yeah, it's got to be heated up. Do you have anything but water and I like is there anything other than a water based beverages in your fridge You have any soda any iced tea and he's lemon there. No, yeah, we got booze. Oh unsweetened cranberry unsweetened cranberry. What do you mean unsweetened like the organic stuff? It's there's just no added sure so it's like very tart, but I'll put a pinch of that in some vodka ocean spray We're talking. I don't know if they make it. Yeah, I think yeah, but I don't know I had such a giant there's like a place and I just grab it and put it in a dough probably I was brought for the day of this lake view organic stuff You get when you have a UTI it's brutal. Oh brutal. Yeah, that'd be good. Yeah, really? It's pretty tart. Huh, okay Have you ever owned a copy of boondock Saints? No Do you own any DVDs? No, we went over there. That's right. Not lying to you about it. Have seen it You've seen it. Did you enjoy it? Where's where you the kind of guy where you're like, this is not my personality or no? No, you know, but I've done that with so many movies Such as please fear and loathing in Las Vegas Was Hunterous Thompson for like two two days three days without taking drugs and shout Yeah, just I don't know if you're really in a shit Of course, of course any action movie when I was a child, you know the grifter series Marvel series I had two toy guns The Marvel series. I think it was Marvel when you were a kid. Yeah, who were you? Grifter his name is grifter. You were like a face mask. I know who you're talking about and that's an odd choice again The boondock Saints trash. Mm-hmm. Any posters on the wall while you were growing up. Yeah Phillies it was it was like movie posters died out of the vengeance. Okay. Yeah, I think but last I mentioned I had a hooter's calendar And oh the Riddler I was thinking about after you left the Jim Carrey is the Riddler. That's a good one. Yeah, yeah. Yeah Oh, he was great in that that movie gets trashed all the time. Yeah, that bass Assume you're not a massage manicure pedicure kind of guy. No, you don't like people touching you probably. I do like missages Oh, you don't get them or like just from like a loved one you loved one. Okay What I'll get them sure if my grandmother's around Hey person that I've sexually active Are you a romantic guy? I think sometimes sure flowers candy rose petals. No, no, no, no, no I think a woman's hand time to time. Yeah, so I suppose not but I would say romantic and so far is trying to you know get pussy Be comforting and yeah, and I got you soft and sweet. Yeah, yeah, I got you and yeah attentive Very important these these ladies like the attentiveness Hmm I knew when your family have a breathalyzer in their car My brother That was the moon show. It was but it was his own purchase. Oh Wasn't state-man did like statement to no case. He's if he has a couple to know if he's drunk or yeah, yeah, yeah, she's it Those are expensive as shit Yeah, no, he's like a handhold one. Yeah, which we use my my boy had one in his car like the interlock system by the state And then he would have a private one to be like am I am I you know, can I start this Yeah, the idea that Josh my brother would have a actual like statement Got it a police auction It's also just yeah for him to go. Yeah, my brother had not like to assume the fun kind And not the oh, we're gonna take your kids kind Ha Very very interesting is it starters or appetizers appetizers, okay, that's a great question. Thank you Kevin Yeah, you guys I can't tell you how much I love your podcast. Oh, thank you. We've been working on your questions Well, some people have some people have doubted my work ethic. I got your your cards. I got your cards I bought the cards everybody should give you them for free Yeah, we have the first edition. What you have the first edition. I think so I'm just learning to make multiple editions. Yeah, yeah, so yeah, it's thank you very much. Thank you. Yeah I think Gerber was perfect for this line of questioning as well. Yeah, how do you feel about Buffalo chicken dip? Not into it. Not really anything buffalo flavored You don't like wings? No Buffalo pizza. He doesn't do the bone buffalo chicken sandwich. I mean he's You put it on a shoe. I ain't gonna touch it Is it too spicy? I just it's a spider maybe it's a little texture style. I don't know. I've just never been a My brain says no thanks. Do you like Sriracha? Yes, I can't get enough of that. Oh, that's right You said that you like Frank's and all the other hot sauces not as much, but I'll I'll do it How do you like a cheese steak? The chicken cheese steak. Do a chicken cheese steak. Yeah, I can see I just got into eating steaks Reason like meat red meat. Yeah, I didn't for a while and then I where where are you doing them at the house? Are you going out to get to go? What's the order? I'm your waiter. Hey, Mr. Gerber. How are you? I go could I get the um, and then I would go what's it called? I wouldn't do this. I would say what are the different fillet the fillet you get a fillet man eight ounce ten ounce Whatever Whatever makes me look cooler. Let's flip it up. How do you get it? I do I go medium-well Which I know is appalling to a lot of people. Yeah, that's okay. Fuck him. Yeah, fuck him. Fuck him. You're paying for it. Yeah Just a little bit of pink in there. Yeah I'm with you and what do you like do you like a side when you go out to get that you do like the potatoes potatoes? Yeah, mashed Sure. Cream spinach. Absolutely not Really? Cream spinach Wow, that's I'd never even heard of that frankly. I believe I'm a little upset He also never heard of breakfast burritos or other countries No, there's that one place in Philly that makes him Huh, Gerber. Do you have a grill at the house? I do We'll use it. No Is it a pro-pinger grill charcoal? It's tapped into the get the hard-wired hard-wired. No shit hard-piped in grill I come with the house. Uh, no. No, you put that in there. Yeah, that seems dangerous Yeah, no, of course. Yeah I don't know that's going directly into the house. What do you mean? Yeah, but it's in the house already Yeah, fair enough. Yeah, that's it. You're stoked you got fucking a lot of gas in it. Yeah Oh, I should use it more. He should. Yeah I'll come over. I'm not bringing anything You ever donated to a mega-church? A mega no, okay. I want you to first smoke pot I was a freshman in high school college So put me in 18. Yeah, where'd you go to college again? I started at George Washington. Okay. GW. Yeah, that you failed out. Yeah, huh, then went to Dalor County Community College That fell out of there and then finished at Truxel Yeah, that's a lot turned do we ask you that last time? I don't think so. I think so How the fuck do you get? How do you make that move? How do you fell out of community college? Get into Truxel That's a good school. Oh because I had in high school written a screenplay and the director of that program Had what your max Fisher from fucking rush more. I love it And I don't know if I should name Java, but I mean, he's retired either Abrams just such a sweet man that when I He remembered me from that and so then I went and met with it and he was like he got in. Yeah After flunking at a delco, mm-hmm, man look at you Something else. Did you live at Truxel? Would you commute I commuted because at that point then I was Working for my dad and I had flunked out at two school. Yeah, yeah, yeah Fair enough. Yeah, I flunked out of college too. I'm surprised you did though. I know I'm a sleeper on that everybody like Smart guy thinks that yeah, you are smart guy. No, I think I'm smart in like certain ways like I can read when somebody is upset that I'm playing slowly. Let's say like I like You pick up I can pick up on the head nod social key such and such. I think so I thought you're gonna say you're good at reading in public, which I'm terrible at. No, I can't either hate that going around the room And everyone's reading the paragraph. Oh, oh my god. I will fuck it up I feel like an idiot. Oh, we're gonna do a table read. Oh, no table reads I can do. Oh, yeah Now give him a give him like a fucking change it last minute and drag monologue. Yeah, but I can do now but drop it on your last minute. No problem I'm playing one with it. What the fuck? I'll totally fuck it up Man huh, hmm. What's the verdict there, Kip? I mean, yeah, you know Same as last time. It's like he why said like he walks in both worlds. Do you remember when the first time you had lobster? Have you ever had lobster? I've tried different fishes Oh, it's ever said no one's ever responded It's like I've tried shellfish. It's just not for me and then yeah, yeah, and I want to like it because you know I was like a bulk phase like trying to pack on a mass Which like I'd still like to do ideally What he says you know I was in a bulk face like like it was in men's health Just like trying to you know, okay, what were you eating the bulk up chicken? So I wanted to add, you know, I was watching like the rock talk about God and Sam and I just can't enjoy it Huh, yeah, so so it's a no on lobster and also I'm just Bowling in a live sort of thing is a little upsetting sure really yeah, huh. I respect that I mean, you know I think it's the same like I don't want to say odd. I don't want to say weird Interesting Interesting specific niches of trash. Yes That carries himself in a pretty well-rounded respected way at the same time for sure walks in both worlds I think is the the official verdict micro even the lingerie That's I mean what an honor what an honor to walk in your curbing. Yeah, we just like urbaned We did we just got Gerby Yeah, buddy. Thanks for coming. Yeah, I appreciate you Three tires is out now on Netflix and it's so much fun. Anything else you want to folks to know no There's no pizza for you. Okay, do what you got for them guys special come out a big special All are you garbage that we shot in Tampa it's gonna be on Right here on our YouTube channel so subscribe if you're an audio listener and check it out when it drops baby Garbon, we love you. Yeah. Love you guys. Kang, we love you and we'll see you in three days.