I have the most incredible gift in the person of Jesus. Like he's given us everything we need. And yet we go through the season acting like Moore's gonna make us happy. - Uh-huh. (upbeat music) - Hello there, you're listening to The Girl Talk Podcast. My name is Carol. - I'm Kelly. - I'm Trisha. - And we're so glad you've joined us today. We're gonna be talking about Advent. I have to, like, admit to you girls that before a couple of years ago, I really hadn't heard of Advent. I didn't know what it was about. - Right, I've heard the word. - Yeah. - Not really understood it. Not known what it meant to me and my family. - Absolutely. - I grew up in the Methodist Church, and so Advent was a big deal. So maybe you're more qualified to tell us kind of explain all about all that, but I can just certainly tell you that the religious piece of it, you know? It was, there was definitely more of that tradition, more, I shouldn't say pomp and circumstance, 'cause that's not really it, but definitely pauses and intentionality in what we did. So every Sunday, we would, we had an Advent wreath, and we would light a new candle on the Advent wreath. We, there would always be a message that would go along with just the anticipation and the waiting and the preparation of our hearts for the coming Messiah. And so it was methodical, as the Methodist Church has a tendency to do, which is beautiful in its own way. And, yeah, such a good tradition for us to do as a family when we were growing up as well. - Yeah, and each of the weeks represents something, right? - Right, yeah. - So hope and joy, peace, love, and then the Christ Cross. - Sure. - The Christ candle that's in the middle. But the whole heart of Advent is preparing yourself, right? And I think that's kind of where I wanna go with this. This is not so much an episode about Advent, but preparing ourselves for Christmas, because I don't know about you, but that is one of the hardest things to do. As far as preparing myself to celebrate Christ during Christmas, and you may be looking at me with a side eye right now, and that's okay, but in the midst of all the hustle and bustle, it's hard to slow down, to pause, to think about the real reason that we're celebrating, and to not get distracted by all the other things. - Oh, yeah, 'cause there's so many opportunities to get distracted with things, and so many things that are going on during Christmas that are not about Jesus. - Yes, absolutely. - That are about family, or about gatherings, or about food, or about parties, or, you know, about Santa Claus. - Reservations. - Yes. - Yes. - Yes. - It's about preparing the heart, not the to-do list. - Yeah. - Right. - Yeah, and it certainly should be. - Yeah. - Preparing the heart, not the food. - Yeah. - That's right. - 'Cause I think, you know, we get, we get hung up in the tasks of it, like you were saying. - Right. - So how do we prepare well as we head into getting ready for Christmas? And what does that, how can that look differently, both for us as individuals, and maybe for our families this year, as we prepare to celebrate Christmas? What do you guys, when I say that, what do you guys think about, as you look at your schedule, as you look at the way that you spend your time, maybe a lot of people have a lot more time off during this time of the year. So how can we prepare and get to Christmas with a real appreciation and celebration of what Christmas really is? - I mean, I think first of it, the first thing to do is knock off the to-do list now. - Yeah. - Make sure you have intentional space. Block time on your calendar now for time of reflection and time for just dwelling in what God is doing. Grab yourself a really good advent calendar that's gonna remind you of scriptures that you could pray or just keeps pointing you to Jesus day after day after day and go ahead and prepare now to be present then. - Yeah, there's a ton of advent devotionals out right now and they have become very popular and they kind of lead you in that. I had some friends that every night of December, they would gather and read a devotion and light a candle on their log. You know, they had one of the big logs every day. - A you'll log. - Yeah, you'll log, yes. But they were intentional and they would call me and say, you're gonna come over tonight and light the candle with us, you know, and so that was neat to be a part of that. I won't ever admit to being that, you know, planned out and dedicated where every evening we have something, you know, but I think it can look differently for us this year when you talk about, you know, slowing down and reflecting, this is one of my favorite pastimes ever at Christmas time. It is to turn out all the lights and just have the Christmas tree lights on. - Yes. - Yes. - Maybe it's instrumental music playing in the background. - Yes. - That does more for my soul than a lot of different things. - Why do you think that is? - I think because it's quiet, even if there's instrumental playing in the background, I think it's still quiet. And I think it just, it forces me to stop. I can't see all the things I need to do. I can't see all the things I forgot to do. I can't say, you know, it's just a quietness that we've referred to it on this podcast before about, you know, if you dip a jar of water out of the creek, what you're gonna have is some dirty water and some stuff floating around. But if you set it on the counter and let it settle, you know, and that for me, nothing but the Christmas lights is allowing my soul to settle and allowing all those things to kind of calm down. - Yeah. - And to just know that there are any demands on my time, there are any demands that anybody needs anything for me right now and I can just sit there and enjoy the tree and get a nice warm beverage and, you know, just enjoy all the, yeah, absolutely no, not agnog. I'm not an agnog girl, you love me some agnog. I'll drink yours. - Okay, okay. - You can have it, but a cup of coffee or, you know, some tea or something. - Russian tea. - Yeah, Russian tea is another one I favor it. - That's a good one. - So I just think it's important that you set aside that time. And I'll say this, now that my parents are gone, I wish that I had done that more. Just like sat with them and enjoyed that time. And, but we were so busy and my daughter was younger and we were running from here to there and Christmas plays and parties and yaddy, yaddy, yaddy. And now, I wish I had all that time back to be able to sit down and do that. So, as a word of warning to you, maybe you wanna spend time with your parents during this time, you know. - I think you're hitting on something that God's been putting on my heart, which is more of a simplicity, more of a quiet, a quieter celebration of this time period. I'm never gonna be that person who gets the Christmas stuff done early. I just, I don't know why I wanna be. I really respect it. But I'm always gonna be running around getting the last minute things. I don't know, I'm just kind of a little bit more scattered, but if I can simplify things, I think it's better because then I'm prioritizing those relationships and I'm prioritizing the time to really reflect on what really matters during this season. It's the turning off of the lights on my schedule, which is just like a, don't look around at all the other things. Look at Jesus, look at what He did. Look at how He's brought us together. Look at this moment that we can celebrate His love. So, the turning off of the lights around me is a good analogy, I think, for just simplifying this season. It doesn't have to be crazy, organized or crazy, packed full, it can just be full of love. And it's taken me a long time to get to that place. - I think there's so much pressure for you to have the Pinterest Christmas tree and the Pinterest drafts. - Sure, that decoration. - If y'all, I am so terrible wrapping packages. Like, I, I mean, they're probably toddlers who could do a better job than me. I think just because I get distracted and I wanna do something else, I'm like, this is not fun anymore. And so, honest. - Bring Him to my house. I will do them with you. - I will have community. - I will not do them with you. You will do them and I will fight you 'cause that's what I've done in the last few years. - You know, you can pay me in Russian tea. That's what gift bags are all about. - Exactly. - That's why God created gift bags. - I had to stop doing that 'cause my family was giving me such a hard time about it 'cause it was like gift bag polusa under my Christmas tree. - I got a spot underneath our stairway with all the gift bags that are just stacked. And we actually, we actually have something funny where we don't care what the holiday says on the gift bag. We will give you Christmas for birthday or a baby shower for Christmas. We don't care. We think it's kind of funny. - Okay, it's funny. - That is a wrong gift bag. So, that's what we do. - Yeah. And I know a lot of people have simplified the gift giving and they do, I saw one family on Instagram. I think it was, they got, I don't know if it was for Christmas or not, but for some holiday, they got all of, everybody else a wig. So, they brought one wig to the party and wrapped it up and everybody had to wear that wig for the balance of the evening and the photos and they had the biggest time with that. It was so fun to watch. - Yes, that sounds like a blast. - 'Cause this bald guy opens up a long black wig, like an Elvira, a wig, and he was wearing it around. It was just so fun. I know a lot of other people.
people do crazy t-shirts, you know, just get a crazy t-shirt and everybody's gonna wear their t-shirt and they open it. So, you know, there are lots of fun and easy ways, practical ways because I mean, honestly, do we need another thing? No. No, we were actually just this past weekend celebrating Thanksgiving with my family. And we started talking about what, you know, what do you want for Christmas? What are you kind of thinking about? What would you like to have as your presence? And nobody really had any answers. Everybody's oversaturated with stuff. Even the kids were like, I don't know, I don't care. And it's like, we need to rethink this whole gift giving thing in general and not make square pegs fit in round holes and again, bring it all back to Jesus and focus on Jesus instead of on what am I going to give you or what are you going to get for Christmas or how are we going to have the right food or the right party. It's, let's just bring it back to Jesus. So, that's exactly the thing I want to bring out. You know, when you don't need anything because you have everything, but then you don't appreciate anything. Like, I feel like that's where I've gotten to at Christmas. Like, I have the most incredible gift in the person of Jesus. Like, he's giving us everything we need. And yet, we go through the season acting like more is going to make us happy. And we don't appreciate it. And honestly, I mean, if I'm honest, that has described me more times than not a couple of years ago, I went into this store and I was course buying presents, but they had a, a, a beautiful box, like one of those ornate boxes, you know, but it was wrapped and it was, it was gorgeous. And it had a top that you could take off. And there was nothing inside the box, except this little card. And the little card, I've lost it now. I don't know where it is. But this little card basically said, God just wants you. Wow. That's the greatest gift you can give him and put this under your tree so that you remember that the greatest gift that you can give back to God for the greatest gift that he's given you is you and your heart. You know, and it was there for a couple of years, a reminder of that simple thing. And maybe that's something you want to do at your house. You know, just wrap up an empty box that people can open and go, why does you have an empty box? Start gospel conversations about like we have everything we need. And unfortunately, I have lived a lot of my life saying, oh, it's Christmas. We got this gathering to go to, we got to go to that party and got this thing at church. And you know, it just becomes a list of things. And I don't want that. No, I get to where I dread it. Yeah. Yeah. And that's not good. I think how that would grieve the heart of God. Sure. He's doing the celebration of the birth of Jesus. That's the wrong approach. Yeah. I don't want to be like that. So I think about the most fun birthday parties I've ever been to. And then I think about what happens if we throw a party like that on Christmas. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Because essentially it is. Yeah. Right. Yeah. What if we just throw a fun birthday party for Jesus, you know, and even that, even in doing that, just to continually shift your focus back, back, back, back, back to Jesus. So how do we do that, though? Let's talk about that because I'm like here, you're saying, yes, I want that. I want that. But when I leave this room or when I move into the next phase, am I going to get wrapped up in the to do list again? How do I not do that? I think intentionality, you started there. Yeah. But I think that truly is the key. I think it is in the holding each other accountable, you know, and having friends to go alongside and do it with you. Yeah. Yeah. And yeah, that's the kicker too is making sure you can convince other people to do it with you. Yeah. Family probably. Yeah. Most importantly, right. Convincing those people to give up all the things. I'm getting a wig. I'm going to give you another idea because this was the most fun. It wasn't at Christmas. But I don't remember what holiday was. Maybe it was Christmas. Anyway, we got to the party. And of course, nobody bought a gift because it was just a fun get together. And the host said, okay, we're going to go out to your car and shop your car. And you have to bring in a gift to wrap and put under the tree for some. It was the most fun. I think I've ever had at a party get together thing because you had like half empty things of lotion and like I got a Tom Cellic magnet. Yeah, I don't know why that was a surprise car. I had a like a, I think someone given it to me. It was like a toboggan with earphones in it like really cheap. So I wrapped that up. I mean, there was just so many fun things. Somebody gave like a can of oil. It was hysterical. And we just had the best time doing that. And I was like, this is what it's all about, you know, just enjoy each other, have fun. Yeah, eat some Christmas cookies and just enjoy it. Christmas parties have you been to that you can't remember anything about at this time because they were the same old same old and everybody brought a gift. And you know, how many Christmases have we had even with our family where we're like, I don't even remember what you got me for Christmas last year. And, you know, did it matter what I got you for Christmas last year, but that kind of thing just something crazy and wild. And, you know, wearing the wigs or shopping your car or just brings it back to a level of, you know, fun, but then also gives you the space. Again, it's getting back to the space of being able to prepare and focus on Jesus during the season instead of the checklist of things to do if we can just remove the checklist. Yeah, yeah, and do things differently. Like shop your car. I love it. Yeah, it was so fun. Yeah, more unique to your family. Yeah, it has special. I wonder too, if we couldn't come up with some meaningful things to start conversations during, like because we all share meals or, you know, or derives or whatever. But, but to share some, like because Advent is about waiting and about preparing for, maybe we ask, what are you waiting for right now? What are you waiting for? What are you preparing for? You know, a lot of people probably say, oh, I can't wait for the new year. I'm going to go to New York. We're actually going on a trip this year at the first part with my sister's dance. My sister's dance. Not my sister's dance. It's my daughter's dance. My sister does it. Yeah, anyway, we're going. So that's going to really be our Christmas. And I've completely lost my train of thought. I don't know where I was going with that. But anyway, I think it's just important that as we wait and as we prepare, you could ask, what are you waiting for? And that will give you a little, I mean, especially if you have people in your family who aren't believers, that will give you a jumping off point to say, what is it about that that you're anticipating? And then to tie it back into the to the birth of Christ. When you think about the concept of waiting, we don't have to wait in our culture for anything anymore. I think as you go to the doctor's office, the DMV. I will say the DMV. Not the DMV. I had a good experience. You did. I did not. But okay, but waiting is a foreign concept. If you want to hear a song, you bring it up on your phone. You want to have a particular kind of food. Somebody will deliver it to you. We don't have to wait anymore. But there is something very precious sacred, I would say, about waiting. And it is, I think it's a level of surrender. And we don't, that concept to us is not one that we want. But God, I think, calls us to learn how to wait, to learn how to surrender. Not only our time, but our thoughts, and our wishes, and our hopes, and to him and his timing. And so there's something very sacred about waiting. Wait on the Lord, be of good courage, and you will strengthen your heart. I love that verse. I like that. You don't think about how strong the Jews' hearts were when Jesus finally came. They'd been waiting for 400 years. Can you imagine having to wait for anything for 400 years, for multiple generation after generation after generation in the anticipation that was building up. And then also, at the same time, not knowing when it was going to be fulfilled, that would be, that's hard waiting. That's really hard waiting. With us for Christmas, we see an end, we know an end, but we see somewhat of a finish line of Christmas. It has a day, it has a date on the calendar, but the Jews didn't have that. They had to wait and wait and wait with no knowledge of when the promise was going to be fulfilled. It was a promise. It was going to be fulfilled and they trusted that, but they didn't know when, and they waited in silence. There was nothing. It was, you know, I think about waiting for that long and hearing nothing. Like, how hard would it be to trust God in that? Right? Yeah. Like, it would no doubt, nobody lived to be 400 years old now, but, you know, in that day, who knows, but not me because we weren't there to know, to not hear anything for 400 years, you know. Waiting is active. It's not, it's not passive. Waiting well, anyway, waiting appropriately. It takes, it takes active faith. Talk about that. Let's talk about that for a second. What does active waiting look like? For me, active waiting is reminding myself frequently of God's goodness, of His promises, of His faithfulness, not just allowing my mind to go in whatever direction it wants to go in, but going down the road,
road of God has been faithful in the past and he's going to be faithful again, and so I can wait. I can wait on him because I know his character. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, in those reminders too, of just how good he is and how his will and his desires and his plan is so much better. Yeah. Then we could ever dream up for ourselves that it didn't, you know, I'm going to always fall short. My dreams are going to fall short short of the amazing goodness and perfect plan and perfect outcome that he has. And he, like you said, he's been faithful time after time after time to me, but then also to lots of people I've known or stories I've read in the Bible or, you know, throughout history, you can see just time after time after time of God delivering on his promises of showing up in just the right moments. Right. And being faithful, but remembering that is not the default. Yeah. Oh, yeah. That's the aspect of it. Christmas or not. Yeah. So being active in reminding yourself of that. And I will say this as well because I think when we talk about the goodness of God, we talk about maybe what he does. I think getting to know his character too. Yeah. Because that is kind of the building block of seeing the goodness of God is knowing who he is and what his character is. And so I would just add that to the conversations and other thing that you might want to visit. If you're having trouble, you know, with that and waiting on God and you're like, I've been praying for this for a lot of a lot. I get it. There was a girl I ran into at a concert one time and she said, I think it was 15 years. I've been praying for my husband for 15 years. I was like, wow. And she said, he wouldn't have anything to do with church. Didn't believe in God. None of that. She said, for 15 years, I prayed for him. And she said, do you know what? And I was like, no, what? And she goes, he's teaching Sunday school tomorrow. You know, and I was just like, ooh. And she was like, there are a lot of days where I didn't think God was going to answer that prayer. But I just kept trusting his character. Just kept trusting his character. And that's essentially what we're talking about. As we prepare our hearts for what God's going to do today and in the future. And as we prepare our hearts to celebrate the birth of Jesus, this has been such a great discussion. I feel encouraged to slow down, to slow my pace, and to pause, and to reflect, and to spend some time with just the Christmas tree light. So I hope you do too. Hey, we'd love to hear from you. If you've got thoughts or suggestions or ways that you slow your family down and intentionally prepare your hearts for the celebration of Christmas, we'd love to hear all about it. You can email us at
[email protected], check in on the Facebook pages. However you get in touch, we will do a happy dance because we love hearing from you. And you know what? We'll see you next time we gather around these microphones for the next Girl Talk podcast.
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