Simon Bolivar & Wok n Rollin In Venezuela | History Hyenas

Babes we got a great episode the first one of 2026. We're going to be talking about Simone Bolivar What's going on Nicholas Maduro and one of Yannis's old co-hosts calls in yes, Mariana Tensio the esteemed Venezuelan journalist who used To be my co-host that fusion calls in and gives us the scoop the real scoop on what's going on with Maduro And how actual Venezuelans feel about it? You can catch me on the road this weekend in Calgary, Alberta Whoa, and then you can catch me in Royal Oak, Michigan, which is a little it's a safe reported Detroit It's what it is and you can see me this Saturday. I am in Charlestown, West Virginia I'm at Casino in Charlestown, West Virginia. Why I've sold so few tickets. I had to give money back to the venison Enjoy the episode That's just a true story patreon.com slash history hyenas [Music] It's a lot of dumb whitebrow to blackwoods. It's what it is and that's how we're starting the episode Welcome to the first episode of the new year. We are we're just talking about how There aren't a lot of dumb Asian people. There's a lot of very smart Asian people and I'll tell you where most of them are in the New York City area They are at the steakhouse Peter Lugers in Brooklyn the most amount it felt like little Shanghai I almost left calling it Peter Rougers. Yeah They're there. They're in casinos. They're everywhere in San Francisco It looks like China invaded ten years ago. It's what it is. Welcome to 2026 new year new me the year of the dragon This is the year of the dragon and make no mistake. We're changing the concept of the show now rather than coming in with prepared history bits We're just gonna ask Groc and react to what Groc tells us and we're gonna learn along with you And that is the new show and suck my ass if you don't like it because I mean Yeah, I mean, we didn't officially change it to that we were gonna try it, but let's officially change this officially made a statement Okay, yeah, we basically said hey listen We are we're tired to do it research because we never really get it right anyway So why don't we just learn it with you at the same time because we are as dumb as the audience So might as well just become the audience It's you and that's what it is and I also saw on one of those like revolving AI websites Whatever that I always talk about like the doom and gloom of AI that in the top 10 jobs that will be probably not needed within the next decade One of them like number eight. What's historian right historians? They're just saying are not needed because I mean all the history It's just in the chat GPT's brain right I could just talk to it up like today. I was talking to it about some own Bolivar right Right, right. Yeah, we just don't yeah historians anymore at all. Yeah, we need our people who know how to Juice up history a little bit. We need people who know how to fictionalize it. We know the facts. It's what it is We know what Hitler did. Yeah, we need a nice closeted gay kid like Nick Fuentes to tell us that the kid had a rock Yeah, that the kid was cool. Yeah, we want to angle. We didn't think of we want an angle that the hundred thousand historians that studied Original sources didn't come up with and that's yeah Tell you something to we're just bet we're back in our our studio and we just saw our good friend who owns a Chris Italia Who told me before the holidays that he was gonna focus on losing weight and I just saw him and he did not take that advice I mean that kid is falling ball. It was a New Year's resolution that turned into a new years and not happening Yeah, which is a lot of what happens with New Year's resolutions. It's just what it is I made a New Year's resolution that I was gonna get down to my range of cute Which is between 195 and 204 10 pants nine pounds past cute is where you were Ending off last year and then I ended up going to 15 pounds past cute, which is when I was in the 220s I got food poisoning this weekend in San Francisco that shot me right back down to 214 So I don't know what you guys had on Kalashy, but Food poisoning probably wasn't in your thinking and in your guessing in your Hypothesis for your gamble on what Yani would look like, but the kids back to 214 So I am solidly obese. Yeah, but not dangerously. Now here's the thing is I was talking to while you were there in San Francisco Shadow told the history and his fans that went out to see Yani and San friend now I was talking to you during this time and what I was actually Because you were telling me how you felt light headed and you don't know if you can get through it and you power through it Which I as I told you I mean I look up to that I couldn't believe that you could do that I wouldn't be able to do that, but it would have been fun. I would have really hoping for You to go do the shows and then get light headed and nearly pass out on stage because then that would mean and you're a 20-year career You might be the first comedian ever to be carted out of his own show twice on the stretcher Because you were carted out of the comedy connection Providence, Rhode Island in 2019 Artistretcher I got a call from your wife. Is there anything funny to get in carted out? Artistretcher from a comedy club, but there's nothing physically wrong with you. Yeah, yeah I think from now on my comedy shows should just have an EMT on site just like at a marathon. Yeah I'll never forget. I was at my own gig. Okay. I was at my own gig I believe I was in Baltimore and I get I look at my phone and I have three missed calls from your wife And then I go to call her back. She doesn't pick up and then I check my notifications I was on Twitter at the time and about seven people said yo, Yani just went down and they were tagging me and I said what happened I thought maybe got shot. I had no idea and then Brittany was like hey, Yani's just passed out on Stage, um, do you know like if he took any medicine like that? I said the kids wild is all I know I am I actually didn't go down. I hope you know, I've never gone down. I never faded So you never knock me down, right? Yeah, you never know could you imagine paying you know You got your girl there your wife. You got a couple of drinks. You're there to see on your excited And then with the 90 seconds of your table on a stretcher. I got carted out on a stretcher. It's a 10 out of 10 Yeah, at a sold out show at the comedy connection where as I was leaving a Greek guy handed me an icon and they stood up and Clap like I was a football player. Yeah getting getting let off the field. It was not one of my finer moments. Yeah, I mean No, when you strapped in like around the chapter, yeah, it's a 10 That's when we you know, we talked about that. He's the first right right? Yeah, and new members here and like we've Marcus really said You never stepped in the same river twice. Yeah, and so that's where we came up with now We can listen to the story without bubbling anger. Yeah That's where we came up with nets no nets and that's right Yes, we're hold and then we decided to do a series called no net Johnny Nets. Yeah, did what was Shane goes before he was huge. Yes, which we're gonna re-release to use his name in the out Yeah, why don't we take that down and re-release it as if it's new what's grand about Shane Is he such like a comedy guy and a com comedian through and through is that he would even with all success He would come back and do the show. He will be just and they'll say the same things. He doesn't care Now he'll say the same which I love yeah, but we could always just re-release I think we had him on like three times. Yeah, yeah, I mean, dude I didn't episode with him. He was just sitting in my hotel room. Yeah, we can re-release the one with Nate Which was one of the worst episodes we ever had it was just me and him fighting. Yeah, I don't think I was there No, you weren't there. No, it was just me and him having weird energy. Yeah, so but we I love Nate Yeah, so so that's how I started my new that's how you started you knew you're with but but here's the thing is is want give it what You know what give it also take it away because what do you mean what it Jesus Christ give it to Jesus give it all day? Yeah, so I think that I because you did say to me that and it's an interesting thing You said that you weren't sure if it was food poisoning or just the fact you landed in San Francisco And it's just a high-managed Chinese people Way song she ain't yeah, here's the thing. I was in San Fran and I was like what I'm gonna power through it Yeah, there's a lot of power bottoms in the city if they can take a big cock I can take a little food They got things going into their ass. I had things coming out of my ass Which one of us was in worst shape really? Yeah, yeah, so I just powered through it like I was a little Hairless Thai boy in the cash row. It's what is took it and you took it because you got a little thing Like to call yellow fever Way song she ain't Just kidding Nick didn't laugh at that tear our Loads of Chinese people there and they're beautiful people there that look like they want to have a conversation with you Yeah, some of the things that you might have yeah, we did yeah, they just want to talk to you about your tweets They walk around like they have concerns about some of your opinions. Yeah, it's just what it is I texted you on it. I said you got to be happy to come at home big big big you said cuz I had a stomach bug big and had to Muscle through shows it was like the Jordan flu game But meant absolutely nothing and nobody cared garbage on side of the stage and diarrhea all day and hotel room during the rain I said yeah I said worst things got to be anxiety going through the roof to get through shows and you said being good at this just doesn't matter anymore The audience had a great time but the hyena the hyena fans all wearing merch love them, but everybody just wants to be talked to I Said yeah, the whole art form has become crowd work. What can you do and then and then we said oh Then what oh and then you actually we are the sideline reporter NFL sideline reporter Laura Rutledge was on the fly This is for the patreon right? But right, but I can say I'm just saying she was she was especially she was on the flight She was on the flight and that's all we talked about so we talked about that's all we talked about and then you said Yeah, I didn't go into the patreon too early. Let me just say this and then what let me just say this and then Jeff He just put this because that little bit was fun fun fun History of you know, we will read it. We will read so I'm gonna read it now and just edit this and put this at patreon.com Such history ain't is but it's just what yeah, that's getting clipped out. Yeah, it's clipped out about that patreon Yeah, if you heard that was all the main and we clipped it out we moved it We did a little thing called the Maduro. We took it from its home. Yeah, and we put it on a patchy helicopter And we moved it safely to the United States of America, which is patriotic. Yeah, I'm slash history Yeah, you said you said and this also be a patreon. You said no, but there was yeah, the kid that opened for me was his kid Paul very cool Kid, he's a six seven kid used to hoop right from Sacramento very funny, right and Chelsea featured as well And she was extremely extremely funny. Yeah, yeah, yeah, so it was a good time the shows were great History hyena fans were great one of the history hyena fans gave Chelsea the opener of five dollars for some reason and he gave her Presence for me some yeah, don't eat any of the just so if you if we really appreciate the Presence, but if you bake anything or make anything from your house We just legally can't eat it. Yeah, I just can't take the chance. Yeah, it was about 10 to 15 people at the show in merch shirts Yes, so thank you for buying the merch. Thank you for buying the merch I mean, I don't even know do we get the money from I don't even know how that works though the merch I don't know where it is or how to access it. I just know that the guy who runs there I just know that the guy who runs a merch company keeps wanting to have calls and I don't want to call it to anyone I just don't want to deal with it the merch is just not fucking worth it But it's there for you if you're good. We don't really make that much money off of it But it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. Get the merch. Yeah, you know, it's at patreon comms. It's at Our website. It's at history hyenas is back.com. Yeah history. I mean, or history hyenas pod.com It's what it is now. I just just quickly just to catch up because we haven't been you know We haven't seen anybody we took a week off. We took a week off So I'm so happy back. I do want to check in on Jesse and Nick's new years Jesse. How was New Year's for you? What's going on in the Jewish community? I have Jewish happy. Can I guess your New Year's first? Yeah, go ahead Okay, woke up at about nine 17 and 30 seconds. Yeah, brush your teeth went to the refrigerator Got a bunch of the regular ordered smoothie material, which is a Apple love apples. I love eating an apple because apple Tangerine a couple bananas. Yeah, some some weight protein like weight proteins Cut. Yeah, put a little put a little creatine the creatine low zinc in there low zinc mix it up Had a little smoothie right nodded to the nodded to the common law. Yeah, said how you doing got on the bike put the helmet on Went to the studio sat there ate a tangerine A to Tangerine loves Tangerine loves Tangerine to kids like Tangerine Bleep that out. How many Tangerines do you have in your house right now Jesse? I'm actually off Tangerine some big on apples Back and he likes to call a night. He likes to call him nice crisp apple. He goes what a nice crisp apple. Yeah, yeah Nice honey crisp apple. Yeah, we too little fruit. Yeah, he stares at his paintings a little bit Right, he's got a podcast on in the background Not a care in the world not an anxiety in the world waiting to have inspiration and he'll get a little bit now tell me tell me how that's not a wealthy rich life tell me how that's not a better life than 99.9 percent of the human population. That is a better life Tell me he's not living a better life than Jeff Bezos right now the only person living a better life than him on New Year's Day Who what I'm basically saying is Jesse stuck to his routine and he will no matter what which I which is it's longevity that equals longevity The only person who had a better New Year's day than Jesse is our friend Nick Nick The stick yes, Nick the stick because the Nick the stick woke up. He woke up at about 3.45 pm not from partying the night before just from staying up and watching wrestling in Japan Yeah, where the time difference is different now Nick I want to hear about Nick's New Year's and how I remember what stone He was stone, but I also I want I want to hear about everything besides the fact besides so many protests You want you to protest the arrest of Nicholas Maduro. I don't care about that Haven't done fucking anything. I haven't left the house. This is the first time I've left the house since New Year's Are you serious? Yeah, why would you get that lot of 14th? That's smooth. Oh, I got it from From Steve. Oh, yeah Steve Chikoni rice Aroni. Fuck yeah. Yeah, great hat. Have those. We'll take a picture of them. What are those are there? Oh, you get a lot of 14 hat too. Yeah. Yeah, so what so what are you being actually serious right now? You have not today's January Six big day. Have you have you not have you have you not Left the house in January first for real five days now I have and I've gone to key food and that's it I have nowhere else to go and today is also three the three kings day. Oh, that's right special day for all of us That's right. Yeah, three kings day me. It's the Spanish. It's like the Puerto Rican Christmas Yeah, I mean, it's what it is right. Yeah, but let's be honest January 6th is really your Christmas That's my Christmas. Yeah, that's what I tell the people what you do on January six what Chris likes to do is he likes to get a Nancy Pelosi Pinyana. Yeah, and he likes to put it up in the room and then he has the kids in it and then Then the relatives come over and you and the kids like to zip tie all the relatives. Yeah, it's a recreation of very holy night Yeah, what we do is on January six now is we watch a show called the Saints where they do all these autobiographies of the Saints And that's on Fox Nation Fox notes. So we sit around we watch that and then also this is also the year I've been engaged now for one year because I got engaged last year on January 6th if you recall I don't recall But that makes sense because it is a holy day. Yeah, and this is what we call a Puerto Rican marriage where you just stay engaged I've never get married Right today is going to be a day where we talk all things Latin American all things Nick the stick No, we'll call it this is a big episode for Nick the stick and his constituents his canica wins is because is is is we are Nick is Nick's fan group is called the Nick is So Nick and his nick is are They're gonna like this one because we're gonna talk about all about Simone Bolivar Which not to be confused with Simone Biles who are crack open she will get cracked open the only The only problem with Simone Biles is she's so little she's a squid. She's like four six four seven Yeah, so you really got to hold her up and put her on it. Yeah, but I'd still like to Um now here's the interesting thing about Simone Bolivar first of all I was confusing him my whole life with Sergio's boy Jay I always would get them confused, but you know Simone Bolivar was born in 1793. He's a colonial kid He's a good you know that yeah, and he's also what they call a Creole kid Which is another way to say he was a white kid. Yeah, he was just a white Spanish kid But much like the Montreal Quebecers the main land peninsula What what peninsula ours or whatever they called them were the real Spanish looked at them like they were trash Trash just the same way the French look at the Quebec Yeah, like trash now Simone Bolivar Which I'll call the liberator know Ella libertador the liberator right Nick? So he what's interesting about him is the kid he had a big idea because he wanted to make all the Latin American countries You know Columbia, Venezuela. He was born in Caracas, Venezuela in 1793 He wanted to make all these countries Ecuador Peru all he wanted to make them like the United States the Estados in Needles, but they they couldn't get it together and they couldn't become a country Just like we almost didn't become a country a unified country We there was a chance that the United States could have just been a bunch of different countries on the same landmass Like South America is yeah, you know a lot simpler for George Washington to do it first of all because Everyone was Protestant. Yeah, there wasn't that many cultures or languages everyone spoke English besides Native Americans. Yeah, and They Yeah, and they were leaving he was like the Spanish George Washington He was to the a lot of the Jorge Washington. Yeah, he was and the North American Hamilton Yeah, the North Americans had much much lower population and also They didn't have the Andes mountains to kind of separate all these people because you know what I like in Andes mint You have one of those. No, talk to Andes mint. No, I like it Griffith. Yeah. Yeah. I like Andy Garcia And show land man. Yeah, he's a good guy. Yeah. Yeah, he was terrible though in the godfather 14 or whatever it was Just didn't work. It was one too many so now you know because because here's the thing about Spain Yeah, there's a lot of people forget that's back home because for this episode call me primo primo Yeah, so primo do you know like Spain a lot of people don't Don't remember that Spain was very very bad, too. They were the original whites like bad whites Yeah, okay, so like when you say white people are bad Do you mean the Spaniards because they were the ones? First of all, everybody that speaks Spanish in Colombia in Peru and Bolivia in Ecuador and Venezuela Why do they speak Spanish because the Spanish Empire raped it into them? Yes, right if it was French It would be French if it was England would have been English, so don't get mad at me primo, right? Okay, the Spaniards are the one who did that to you puppy not me. Yeah, they all would are weekends They were all indigenous types of native People that have their own languages and cultures and this and that but somehow it's white people stop Yeah, just if you're going to be a hateful a beast. Pacific okay, it was the Spanish that did that to you the mainland Spanish primo your trans-american slave trade Spanish Portuguese. Yeah, no, no Blanco. You did nothing to the South Americans. You did it to the Jews. I yes If you didn't be mad at me if your last name is Finkelstein, I'll support you right I get that gripe but other than that. No. Yeah, I love Spanish people so much. I've made more of them Yeah, that's the thing it always gets confused Spanish, Spanish, what is it? And you know, it's been interesting the Spanish people from Europe. They've done a nifty little thing When they're in America, they've gone, oh, I'm Spanish and people just go, oh that must mean you're Hispanic That must mean you're a protected group. They do a nice little thing that the Muslims like to do I'm a protected group now. It's go whoa, you're Spanish. Yeah, you're not Puerto Rican. Yeah, you're from Spain Yeah, you're like a conquistador. You have a lot of money. You're like a white person with an accent Yeah, but what Americans are so stupid. They just go he speaks Spanish. He must be a protected group It's like no, no European Spanish. Yeah, that's the bad Spanish. Yeah, there's bad Spanish Europeans are the bad Spanish The bad bunny is not one of the bad spanish. He's not one of the bad Spanish often adult is one of the bad Spanish Yeah, Carmen Lynch is one of the bad Spanish. I'm a a have a bar damn bad Spanish Ontario, bandana's good Spanish. It's easy. Yeah, I thought he's from bad Spanish. Oh, maybe he's bad Spanish. Oh, who's the other one? Penelope and cruise bad Spanish bad Spanish. No bad Spanish, but he's so del Toro. Good Spanish Puerto Rican is good Spanish Good Spanish bad Spanish. Yes, he's an Argentina bad Spanish bad Spanish. These are the colonial Spanish powers So, you know, Venezuela Columbia, Ecuador, Peru, Bolivia. I'd be mad at them. Yes, if you're mad at them if you're from Venezuela Colombia, Ecuador, Peru, or Bolivia, you cannot be bad. Yes, you are only good. Yes, because of the colonial period and we judge all of history and the rankings on the moral purity test Based on whether you're a victim or a perpetrator of the colonial error and that's just how fucking history works There was no history before colonialism It just wasn't and then here's the thing Jesse I'm sending this to you right now because a lot of people have been hitting me up asking if this is me and I'm I just want to clearly say that it that it is not and I'm going to show you that this is not me right after this break from Frick and whoever Because you know about fuel H.U.E.L. Oh, do I been taking it? Yeah, and let me tell you something you can get it in your local target All right, if you're focusing on protein right now, which I am because I felt like I got fat fat fat So high protein intake is going to help me lose that weight Fuel gets all your protein in a delicious shake. That's why I started using the high protein starter kit from you It's five black edition ready to drinks plus the black edition chocolate powder And it's honestly the first thing that made it easy for me to stay consistent cuz you know me when I'm talking about anything I like the black edition including guys. That's what it is and did you know, Chrissy? Did I hear this right? That H.U.E.L. just launched in target nation. Why? Yeah, and I already said that you're sundown So what you need is a little fuel you I didn't see the thing is I didn't take my fuel this morning what it is Yeah, so on days that I'm running out the door heading to the gym I just grab a black edition ready to drink. It's a complete meal 35 grams of protein 27 essential vitamins and minerals No artificial sweeteners and it actually does taste really good now The only thing the only danger here is when you grab the black edition ready to drink that has 35 grams of protein 27 events essential vitamins and minerals no artificial sweeteners, but when you grab that black edition You have to really really focus do not put it in your ass Because I know you're gonna see black edition and say this goes in my ass. It goes in your mouth We always have to tell our fans. Yes, because the fans just sometimes don't know they just get their orifices confuse the law Especially if they're in a hurry. Yeah, they say oh, it's black edition. I know where this goes So if you want to try and grab a bottle at target or get the full high protein starter kit online with our code Hyena 20 for 20% off at huill.com slash hyena 20 Thank you to huill for partnering and supporting the history hyenas Because you know me and my favorite singer of all time is Ray Jay and he's got the earbuds the Raycon earbuds And I love them and I like to stick them in my ears and watch some of the work. He's done with Kim Kardashian That's a great way to actually what I do. Yeah, I listen to his music and I watch his videos That's a great way to use them. I wish I had mine with me right now Yeah, but they're always with me when I go on the road. They're so good, you know regular ear blood buds block everything Out you can't hear someone calling your name a car honking anything actually dangerous. Yeah, so these Raycon ones sit just outside Your ear canal, so you get a really clear sound But you can actually hear if someone yells aliyah bar. That's what it is Yeah, and that awareness is perfect for tackling your fitness resolutions safely or anybody yelling aliyah bar You might have tackled exactly so Raycon has over three billion customers and the sound quality is just as good as The way more expensive brands. That's the thing. It's a really high quality product But it doesn't break the bank is what I'm trying to say they're half the price because you're not paying for the same type of celebrity Endorsements all over the place and all that retail markup stuff Yeah, and they got 36 hours of battery life eight hours of playtime and 36 hours of battery with the charging case You charge them maybe once a week that's it and that and I'm telling you I use those things a lot And I use it for a lot of different purposes and I only got to charge it once a week Because yeah, and you can connect to multiple devices switch seamlessly without hassle It's really great. So just go listen to the essential open ear buds are now here to help you crush your new year's goals Go to buy Raycon dot com slash hyenas open to get 20% off of everything Thanks Raycon for sponsoring the history hyenas. We love you Ray Jay Cuz while he finds it, let me just say Nicholas Maduro had a rough night of sleep. Yeah, that's rough, right? Yes, all you're doing is you're sleeping. Here we go That does look like you that does and it's just and this is this was in San Francisco while I was in San Francisco Yeah, and we just have no volume in the studio. We're gonna get it. Just get the volume going We're gonna get because this is what people are This what we call a bit of a mental illness. I mean this guy Yeah That was just me in my yard He's reading it straight from Google translate. Yes, the funniest thing ever. He's a white guy I mean, so people are to have just lost their brains. It is leaked out We got a new series. We're starting on patreon.com slash history hyenas our community. It's for our community It's gonna be called leaky where we'll be picking someone Whose roof is fully blown off and talking about them. Yeah, I mean that you know, it's a people from history So we'll make it fun, but it is just interesting to see all these like white people protesting About this Maduro stuff when 80% of the Venezuelan people are happy about this. Yes, right and also Kamala Harris and Joe Biden had a also to 25 million dollar bounty on his head. So what's the deal, baby? We've lost you on it now because right now you might have another family member in crisis now because right now my old co-host from fusion Mario Natanzio who is from ven as well as text me so I said can I call you now and talk about Maduro because that would be fun She's Venezuela, but is she gonna get upset if we're in the pod? I'm saying we are on the podcast right now What is she talking to you about and you talk she's an actual like a P body award-winning journalist, right? She's talking piece. We're just gonna take a little call. Maybe we'll plug this in you never know. Okay, so we're back Yeah, we're gonna. We're gonna. We're gonna find out from actually someone who knows Mariana attention. How are you? My love. I haven't spoken to you so much Johnny I miss you so much Thank you so much for having me on such a fan of what you guys are doing and the second I saw your clip. I'm like I have to tell him how great this is me. I'm more than me. Corazon Vivita we I miss you, but we were sitting here. We're talking about Nicholas Maduro And we wanted to know from somebody who's actually an esteemed journalist a P body award-winning general journalist an actual Venezuelan and I'm gonna try to pronounce this right what is the actual situation with Listen, he didn't get the memo. He didn't think that Trump was actually gonna do it and today we found out actually Trump Trump that it was his little dancing mocking Trump's dance that finally threw Trump over the edge and was like This is so disrespectful. I'm gonna pull the pull the trigger on this operation So I I actually think that he didn't think that Trump was gonna do it. It really caught him by surprise They got John as they got them out of bed in the middle of the night He 24 hours before was Doing the little dance gave this podcast interview, which is like a sort of like a ridiculous carpool karaoke type interview that he does Saying that his bunker was insensible and that the Americans were not gonna come and now look at what happened So I think he's really screwed. He's looking at Life the rest of his life in jail Because he's over 50 years old and these charges are gonna amount to at least 30 years of not more and this is just also by the way the tip of the iceberg i've been covering this regime for the last fifteen years this is just what we know i think that we're but we're gonna uncover that these people have done are just truly atrocities in terms of human rights and and corruption and drug trafficking right you are venezuelan what is sort of the overall sentiment amongst venezuelans i mean the majority of venezuelans are they upset about this are they happy about this i know my amies lit right now no every single venezuelan young is truly or the vast majority are ecstatic we've been trying to get rid of this guy for years we've been trying to do it the democratic way he lost the elections last year he just wouldn't give up power and were made it that that he's out of Venezuela we are just really concerned about the fact that the the machine it's still there and if you look at what it was behavior i mean this guy was a buffoon he you know it's like you left the circus with up the cloud but the circus is still down there and uh. you know they just issued a bunch of decrees because i have as you know my my family a bunch of my friends down there cousins uncles they just issued a decree saying that they're gonna start kind of cleaning house and figuring out who helped the Americans that anyone they're doing kind of like these they have like people with long guns and masks doing random traffic stops anyone that is caught with stuff on their phone talking about what happened praising from could go to jail so i think we're gonna see a wave of repression and that's why you've seen my amie lit like cities across the world Madrid except but nobody in venezuela can go to the streets and celebrate it's a lot of just kind of fear and silence because the worst people are the ones that are left now and now they know what the United States capable of doing so i think i think i think a wave of repression and fear is going to follow and i really do hope that eventually Trump gets fed up with the vp he left in office and and sort of the other three power brokers and gets them out because that's really the only way that we're gonna transition to to a full democracy i want the Nobel Peace Prize winner to assume uh. whole as the rightful leader that we chose but i also understand Trump that it would have been a bit reckless to just yank out you know the whole system that has been in place for 25 years with the Cubans as you know heavily involved in security and oil and all that and just putting this woman in place when she doesn't control the military or the money yeah now what do you what do you think what's your opinion on how the american media has been covering this have they been covering it with a full understanding of the situation the nuance the uh. opinion of the majority of the Venezuelan people in mind one of the things that i have to call them out for and really frustrates me as a Venezuelan is that they show they're like well not everybody because and mostly because this is obviously uh. part of the issue as with everything in this country right there like not every Venezuelan is happy look at these protesters against what they did to maduro and then there's not a single Venezuelan in those protests like are they actually like interviewing real Venezuelans about this so i think the lack of Venezuelan voices is something i want to call the media out on uh. portraying like protesters in favor of maduro where there is a single Venezuelan is not really reflective of how we feel as a community and then other things like continuing to call my little president he's not the president he lost in last year's election the united states said he lost they didn't recognize him so like the new york times keeps saying president and first lady and that's not accurate unfortunately right he was he was kind of voted out and not kind of he was voted out he was voted out so you can say tyrant autocrat de facto leader uh. but stopped granting him the title president because uh. and if you look at what happened in court yesterday that was the first thing that he said maduro he's just like i'm still the president of the country do you never or the president of the country you lost in the last leg you're a dictator right right uh. uh. one more question and that question is how and then i think my co-host christis definitely has a question but i want to ask what do you think china iran russia cuba what how will they respond and how true is it that they were sort of uh. cozying up to maduro and um helping him and was it true that they were investing all this money in venezuelan in return getting uh. cheap gas hundred percent yeah and we weren't even getting gas so i know the rich nation venezuelan's had to line up for gas because we were giving all of our cheap gas to cuba russia china iran so that's why i actually so glad you brought this up i posted a sub-step article about this like about the oil people like when some says like we're gonna take your oil i would gladly welcome american companies coming in and rebuilding an industry and having that bring us back into the fold of like western nations instead of giving our oil to cuba china and iran to further repression and and and internally and keeping these regimes ideologically aligned with literal right absolutely and last question um do you think that venezuelan women are the hottest latin america women in south america because i believe that that may be true you better you better believe that i will not hear otherwise from you because you have first hand evidence i do i use the we work together i sat right there with you for a full year in miami and i saw it right there you are one of the most beautiful moment one of the most well informed one of the most respected journalists on this planet and it's good to hear from you and thank you so much for enlightening us uh. with the perspective uh. and informed perspective from a very swede thank you yana thank you for your questions and i want to thank your audience for listening in and caring truly i feel because we've been dealing with this for twenty five years again and now the world is finally also paying attention and i really want to thank people for even caring and wanting to get better informed i'm mariana this is chris uh. de Stefano yana says co-host i envy you chris oh um well i appreciate that and i just want to say thank you so much for bringing your unbelievable knowledge um and education to this podcast your articulation on this topic you're so smart and so beautiful and i would ruin my life to have an empanada with you in downtown caracas that is a promise that you know free karakas we're going to do yes you may even host a podcast episode down there who knows yes we may and i'm just praying to the gods of the united states of venezuela of anything that my wife doesn't hear this podcast because i'm actively in love with you i gotta go go to all our fans go follow mariana attention on instagram go check out her sub stack and you can see all her videos uh. on her instagram from her uh. media appearances and her coverage on venezuela and whatever she covers in the future and if and if you see any direct messages from at christie comedy asking to use to see your feet just now i was hacked it wasn't me i love you guys glad to come on anytime thanks mariana bye mariana she is a piece as you know i mean we are the same age yeah she is a fucking he's a piece she's also very smart she went to columbia she's a p-body award-winning journalist she's a real career my amie she lives in my amie and she's i think she's single i know she's divorced out i think she has a no she's not she has a spousal no i'm getting married yeah so it is what it is but i was just having a little fun god god please don't hear that yeah i can hear that okay peace so let's see venezuela what i would like to do is i listen is there a compromise yeah which i understand like fine we give maduro back that's what people want but then all venezuela women come here that's what we do that trade maduro goes back but then it's a country of maduro and only men and then every venezuela woman yeah that's kind of like the new ice is date we get them to the border and then we just have a little bit of a we just judge you know like not a judge but we just kind of look at them and we kind of can admit you entry or you go back i yeah i mean what about that like you know like some of the like she's coming yes come yes you're in yes yes here's the thing is nine million of them already left yeah and we what we want to do is we want to make it good so the guys go it's good to go back and the ladies want to say yeah yeah it is just have all the yeah venezuela women yeah now Nick what Nick you're not going to sway and i know that so but what is your position on Nicholas maduro being taken out of power because it seems like the Latin American community has different opinions on this but there were a lot of tiktok videos and a lot of instagram videos which i watched over the weekend that were very funny with venezuelans with spanish accent she's talking about people white people they go white people stay out you don't don't stay you don't stay you're not from my country you don't understand get out of my get out don't keep your mouth closed key your mouth cut how many of those videos do you guys say you saw those dick yeah so what's your opinion on Nicolas maduro because right now let's be honest president Trump has Nicholas Maduro on toast yes just if you like maduro how about trying to my toast oh yeah you know what leave us alone okay you got our guy so now leave us the fuck I don't know, you're always gonna get different opinions from, you know, 'cause you can't lump us all together. We're all different people. We're all gonna have different opinions. Personally, this is all I know. History has just shown we invade other countries. We fuck with them. That's all we do. And then we create more refugees. And everyone's gonna be like, oh, now the Venezuelans are coming to here. They're coming on my town. They're not coming to fucking Farmingdale. You know where they're gonna go? Where? My neighborhood. Roseville Avenue. And I can't fucking stand it. 'Cause I don't have any fucking room. Wow, it's real, but what you will get is a nice increase in prostitution. Yeah. It's already happening. You guys should come. Wow. That's why Nick hasn't left the house because the people just came to visit him. Yeah. Nick wants Venezuelans out of his fucking neighborhood. Wow. Nick just got very Italian. He said, don't come to my fucking neighborhood. Yeah. I mean, you know, they're in Miami because bubbles. Nick does have a point that we kind of just destabilized yet another region. And then we're gonna get mad when the immigrants want to come here. And it's like, we're the ones who destabilized. Yeah. I mean, there's a good argument to be made that it never really works out exactly the way we want it. Yeah. But there are a lot of Venezuelans who are happy about it. Supposedly they voted them out. Supposedly. And so what is the deal? He is not because because they say that he actually didn't win the 2024 election. And that's why the United States government is able to take him because there is a law and international law like you can't take ahead of state. Well, he was, he was indicted in New York as a drug trafficker. So he was actually wanted by the United States legal system, him and a few other of them. So I guess Intel and evidence showed that he was allowing drug trafficking routes through Venezuela to get drugs into the country. Right. And so Trump just took that and ran with it. The other countries, the other administration is before we're saying the same thing. Biden actually put a bounty on his head for what 15 mil 25 mil something like that. But Trump just went in and took him and obviously the larger picture is about how much he's been cozy enough to China. I ran. Yeah. And so Trump say we're not doing that anymore. This is our hemisphere. Right. So he's saying get out of my neighbor. Trump is basically saying what Nick said about Queens. Yeah. He's saying get out of my neighborhood to Iranians, Russians and Chinese. Now, how is it going to end? What is going to happen with Maduro? I mean, he can't kill him. That's not going to happen is he going to stay in the federal prison for the rest of the life. I think he's playing patty cake with Diddy right now talking about the different type of oils that were confiscated from what it is. Yeah. I think that's all that has what what a what a celebrity row prison. You got Maduro's in there. You got Diddy's in there. You got Luigi Mangione's in there. Yeah. You got a few guys in there. You got Takashi six nine is going in. Got a taxi says nine in there. And you had Jeffrey Epstein used to be in there. What a nice one. And that that prison is in sunset park. It's in sunset park. And probably the owners of the stand will be in this soon. That's right near Jesse. Who knows what golfing studio. Yeah. Who knows. Jesse could get killed by accidental helicopter gun machine gun fire. Cause if Venezuela retaliates, it could happen. Cause if Jesse ever dies before us, what we'll do is every Monday, we'll just go put a tangerine on his gravestone. We just will. Yeah. But what this did, I think also show was like it was a little like a little show of strength from America going like, Hey, we still we still can operate with precision because it was a crazy operation extraction. Yeah, they say that I heard some some theorists online that this is not as crazy as you think that there was some kind of secret deal made. And the guys just let American Tim, but I don't think that's true. I think there probably was some of that. I think there was probably, but they killed this whole security team. Yeah. Which is great. But I think there was also some kind of he's not a very popular guy in Venezuela. Anyone who's, uh, supports him is kind of, you know, been brainwashed or is lives in fear or kind of, you know, the majority of people don't like him. They voted him out. I think the latest polling like 2024 or something like that. It's like 80% event as well as didn't like them. Obviously, the one of the largest, um, uh, refugee crisis is because of him. 9 million fled the country because of him. So that's 13 comes out of Venezuela. Yeah. So the diaspora of Venezuelans hate him. Right. And so, um, they all wanted them out. So I'm pretty sure there was some assets on the ground that had some knowledge of it. Some intelligence assets that were like, we'll stand down. I mean, his military definitely stand out. You can't just extract the president, uh, extract the president of a country, uh, that easily without, without, without. I believe that like 12 guys over there. Yeah. I mean, it was like, it was like 12 dudes went in there. Just took the president. Yeah. I mean, it was basically Joe Rogan's fucking security detail got in a helicopter and fucking got this guy. Yeah. Watching an episode of lioness and it's the United States. So, you know, you know, that half army was trans. Exactly. You just got taken by some trans kids. A couple of kids rolled up and skirts with fucking semi automatic weapons and took Maduro and put him on toes. Yeah. That's another, that's another funny thing you sent with the, yeah, you. Another funny text to wait up and send us one of you. Yeah. Hold on. Hold on. Yeah. I mean, we can actually throw that one up because it's very, very funny. What you just say, wait, hold on. Hold on. Hold on. I'll send you the text. I got a preface. It hold on. So the extraction made it look big. It was carried out by elite US forces, uh, the army's Delta Force and 160th Special Operations Aviation Aviation Regiment called the Night Stalkers. You don't want to fuck with the Night Stalkers house. Yeah. And they had a little assistance from an FBI unit. Um, the raid involved more than 150 aircraft. So they, I think they kind of, like, they kind of confused them. They swarmed with 150 aircraft fighters, bombers, tilt rotors launching from 20 different damn land, sea bases to suppress vent as well in air defenses and provided cover for the ground to you. US forces entered Maduro's heavily fortified compound at 1 a.m. and encounter significant resistance, brief firefight, the team captured Maduro's and his wife. Yeah. So two and a half hours. They were in and out. So I, and I said to Janice, I said, well, this is going to have big implications because now US took Venezuela, China might take Taiwan as some strategize, whatever, a kind of tip for tat. And Janice said, not if these two ladies got anything to say about it. Yeah. Yeah. So that's just what it is. That's at one point. These were people leading our military. So these two ladies right here are going to stop all forms of war against the United States. And if you want to mess with us, you got to mess with these two ladies. You got to admit, it's a little bit of a different vibe on the military scene between the Biden administration. And it's rough. It is. Yeah. Pete. Yeah. Pete Hegseth has Catholic crosses and death to all Muslims tattooed in his body. And then Biden had these two ladies. It's a little bit of a different vibe for sure. Yeah. When it comes to Taiwan, it's interesting because I think the fear is like, oh, they're going to retaliate and take Taiwan. But you can, I think also make the opposite argument and go like, they're looking at Trump going, this guy just does not give a fuck. Yeah. And he will resist. Some of it is some of it, some of it, whether you hate Trump or like Trump, it's irrelevant. You got to just admit that some of this has to put fear in other countries. Without it. This guy just went in and took somebody's president that without a doubt. I think I think it goes like, he's not just, you know, if Biden was all talk, you can't deny that. He just was all talk. It was more containment. I don't think just by yeah, maybe Biden, you could say that. But I think it was just containment. I think it was like, it got to the point where I think that like I said again, I don't even think the heads of state matter as much as the people who are constantly in government, constantly in advance going like, all right, this is what's been happening in South America with China and Iran and Russia. And we're losing, we're losing influence down there. And it's time to say we've been trying to negotiate, we've been trying to contain, but the Chinese are rolling forward. Yeah. And so we got no choice Chinese are walking rolling. A lot of 14 might be the name of the episode. Just wanted Chinese are walking rolling. Yeah. And we may need to just go from containment to actual rollback. Yeah. And what they're doing now is, I mean, Trump, there's no question, all the bullshit you're online, this is about China, Russia and Iran. It's what it is about. Yes, it's about oil, blah, blah, blah. But it's really about like, they're not going to have it. We're going to, well, we're not going to be able to go in there and get the Iranian leader like we did. No, no way. That would be like an actual ground scale for real war. That would be a problem. You're not going to get him. Yeah. What we're basically saying is if it's in our hemisphere, it's ours. And we want you out. So we China is fucking big in Latin America. And what China has done is given Nicholas Maduro a trillion dollars. And in exchange, Venezuela has given, as alone, and in exchange, Maduro is giving them oil. So now who's going to get China still owed oil? So who's going to give them the oil? That's yet to be seen. But whoever's calling the shots has an American flag been on their jack what it is. Yeah. It's what it is. So I know a big conglomerate of US businessmen are going and women are going down to Venezuela this week because they said there's just like a lot of opportunity down there now. Yeah. And the stocks went up too. Stock market went up. So people in the business are like, good. Yeah. I mean, I'm not, you know, I know it destabilizes people, but it's just people's numbers one up. I mean, listen, if we end up controlling the oil or whatever, bad thing for business today, bad. It ain't bad. It ain't bad. I mean, somebody's got to control it. And here's the thing, people go, oh, the Venezuelan people were, no, they weren't. No, they weren't getting any of it. It was just all fucking going out. So basically China and Russia and Iran were going, hey, we're gonna invest all this money in your country, we're gonna protect you, we're gonna do all this, just give us that free oil. So he was actually just, he wasn't even paying them back with money, he was paying them back with Venezuelan's oil. So it's like, the real world operates like this, pick your poison, which evil do you want? You want the Americans or do you want the Russian Chinese and Iranians? Yeah. Miniculous Maduro chose them. And we said, no, you choose us. It's just what we chose us for us. Yeah, it's for you. It's what it is. And we're just doing this to balance out a little guy named so wrong, mom Donnie. We just want to get him to balance it. It was funny on the group chat. Oh yeah, well, I'll tell you what my boy said in the group chat right after this. Cause here's the thing. Yeah. You know me. Yeah. And you know what I got everybody for Christmas, right? Yeah. Yeah, I got a hard cox. Everybody opened up a hard cock, a dick in a box. It's Justin Timberlake would say, and I got those hard cox from Blue Choo. Cause I have been having sexual dysfunction in my life. I haven't been able to get it up. I've just kind of had a sloppy, just kind of half mush dick. Yeah. But then Blue Choo came into my life. Yeah. And cause I am rock hard. I was watching Landman yesterday. And every time, uh, fucking Billy Bob Donnie came on, I had a stiffie. The thing about it is it's not only good, right? If you have a little ED or whatever, or you know, you like to have, you're more of a people pleaser and you have performance anxiety. Sure. It's also good for married guys who just need a little help getting up for their nine to five. Yeah. Nine to five. Yeah. It's just what it is. Yeah. It's just having sex with the wife after 11 years. It's just a nine to five. Just a nine to five. And it's just like a cup of coffee by the water cooler. Blue Choo. It's just there. It dissolves under your tongue. It works as it has little as 15 minutes. That means you can get it on quicker and stay in the game longer elevation without hesitation. I mean, Blue Choo cause and it just, it's what it is. I mean, the other day, I saw a tank Sinatra and he had a mustache and I just taken a blue Choo. And it was like kind of like a Hitler stash. And I said, cause I'm sorry. Don't mind me. I just took a blue Choo. Now I'm looking at your Hitler stash and my dick is hailing. We got a special deal for our listeners get 10% off your first month. Blue Choo gold with the code hyenas. That's promo code hyenas. Visit bluechoo.com for more details and important safety info. And we thank Blue Choo for sponsoring us. I also want to mention blue Choo gold is the newest innovation from the number one chewable ED brand. The St. and Grand Puzz little blue pill. This is the four in one beast that's setting the gold standard for performance. We're talking two ingredients for blood flow to keep that rocket cock pumping mixed with apple morphine and oxytocin to turn up the arousal and the connection in your brain and body. So on the group chat the other day and then we'll get back to Simone Bolivar. It was funny because they were you know when he got sworn in. So I'm done. He got sworn in. I believe on January 1st. It was all this chatter. They were yelling. They were like, I can't believe he's going to get sworn in on the Quran. This kid's going to get sworn on the Quran. And then I said, well, Mayor Bloomberg got sworn in on a Jewish Bible and then nobody responded. Nobody just anything. And then they just the next text was from pounding five balls. He went, wow, giant suck. So it's just what it is. Well, the Jewish Bible is old testament. Yeah. So yeah, I think that's sworn in on a Bible on the old test on the old testament. So I guess kids were just looking for a way to be like, this is a travesty. But then you say, well, other people didn't have it done on the Catholic Bible. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Just what it is. It's what it is. Yeah. It's what it is. Now Simone Bolivar. Yeah. What I what was funny interesting about him is the kid like like Zoran and like a lot of others, which is very like Teddy Roosevelt. He grew up very wealthy. Yeah. So that to me, what is it about wealthy kids? Because you understand why a kid who's brought up in poverty would want to go and unite all his countries and be the leader, the military leader of a country. But when a kid's got a lot of money, well, why do they want to do it for? Because they're the only ones that have enough time to sit around and think about injustices. Right. Or people are just trying to survive. That's good. They also have the means to try to make something happen. Now this kid was unstoppable there. Simone Bolivar, I mean, this kid, I mean, they tried to assassinate him a bunch of times. He married some chick who ended up dying a yellow fever at 21. He never remarried the real yellow fever. Yeah. And not the con. Yani had it. Sam Fred. That's exactly right. Then he had a long-term affair with this chick who was a revolutionary. And this bitch was tough as nails. There was actually an assassination team that came into his house to try to kill him. And this bitch fought them off with pistols and she got hit and head with swords. So that's just now you're going to want to bang that lady out. That's kind of hot. She is fucking loyal and hot. Revolutionary pus. Revolutionary Latina is a fiery. But this kid was a self-taught general basically. And he was a military mastermind. And what he did was he liberated all these regions from the Spanish crowd. And guess what? It ties in to Venezuela because he was born to a Creole family in Cacas. So he was Venezuelan. He was Venezuelan. And that's why Simone Bolivar mostly identified with Venezuela, but also Colombia big because he was he is credited with leading the charge to liberate them in 1819. That's that's why Colombia is free from Spanish rule because Bolivar did it. And like I said, Bolivar wanted to unite all these countries and make like a Spanish federation just like the United States. And he actually invited United States delegates at the time. James Monroe was present and he invited the United States delegation to the little delegate to the conference they were having to unite the Spanish people. And the United States showed up two weeks late. Yeah. Well, they just didn't come. Were they black? That's yeah. Way song she ain't. It's possible. They just showed up a little late. And they said, sorry, we thought we were on black time. Live 14. So his whole one of his the most famous things he's known for is the famous 1819 was the year crossing of the Andes, which I just said. Yeah. Oh, you just say that. Checked out. I was checked out. Yeah. Yeah. Cause you're just thinking about wait. Did you just say that? I just said the crossing of the Andes, which led to the Colombia being free. Yeah. That's right. And I also said that he was born in Venezuela. Caracas, Venezuela about 25 minutes ago. So I have checked out. Just what is the kids just checked out? You're on snooze. I want to I'm waiting to hear get this call from Mariana. I want to talk to her. Yeah. You're just thinking about her feet, but he wanted to unite Venezuela. All these countries and he but the problem was too too much too diverse too much in fighting. And so he thought he goes, look, all these Latin countries aren't ready for democracy. So he said, I want to make myself the dictator, a benign dictator until Latin America can mature into democracy. He didn't think they were ready. He said they needed strong centralized authority. But that eventually avoided. And that eventually caused chaos. It didn't it didn't work. The people were just not united. It was too many different languages, too many different races. It's a lot different regions. But the United States was able to do it because they were able to do it because they had less people. And like I said, it was just Protestants. They also were like landowners and, you know, sometimes let's be honest, you just kind of let the white guys figure it out. Lot of 14. That's probably why the US work. They just said, you know what? Let's just let the white guys figure it out for a hundred years. Way song she ain't. And then we'll start to give other people rights, but just can you just let the white guys figure it out? Lot of 14. It's a simple way. I mean, I just, I'd be at a dick, but you know, you know, sometimes, you know, just let these guys figure it out, huh? And then we'll come in when we're ready. And then everything's nice. Everything's set up nice. Yeah, I just set it up as what you say. You know, set it up. It's like, you know, sometimes the kids are going crazy in the kitchen. And I say, kids, once you just go watch TV, yeah, go throw on SpongeBob for you. Throw on K-pop and the demon out there for the 19,000 time. Let me my set up to set it up. Yeah, set up the table. Yeah, everyone come in when they're ready. This way, nobody's pouring their drinks. No, you know, supposedly Simone Bolivier had, he had similar opinions. Yeah. And he was just like, all right, yeah, he was, he had a paternalistic opinion. He was saying let the whites, let the Spaniards basically, he was saying let the elites, let the Creole handle it, figure it out, let the elites handle is the word I should be the elites. He had no problem having the, uh, mistizos at the natives and the blacks fighting his army. Yeah, unfortunately. But when I came to planning, he was like, you guys just can't, he said, can't work this guy. Look, listen to me. I understand everybody, you know, Greg Colombia, we want to have this one Spanish, you know, uh, United States, version of the United States. And it's a beautiful thing. But for now, I'm just going to ask anybody who's just got a leaf around their dick if they could just wait outside. Waysong she ain't anybody who came in here with a spear and just leaf leaves for underwear. I'm just going to have to ask you to just, if you go back to the end, these mountains for a minute, and then we will contact you, we'll send a smoke signal, one, two, three. Waysong she ain't it says that's just kind of, I mean, just a little bit, a little bit. It's what they say. It's just a little bit. They said this kid came in here riding a goat. He's just got to go. You know we can't have anybody with a chieftain hat on right now and war paint. We just need you guys to just come in here a little bit more civilized. Yeah. Yeah. He had big dreams and he thought it could all work. He advocated for Republican government. The abolitionist slavery, a quality before the law, all the good stuff that he saw in the French Revolution. Sure. In the American Revolution, which obviously he was inspired by. And he wanted to build what he called the Gran Colombia. But it just didn't work out. It was a little too chaotic. And uh, he ended up dying with no money. He gave all his money to the call. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And died at 47. Died at 47 of tuberculosis. Um, that and they think it had a lot of other health problems. But yeah, it's just hard. You know, it's just hard in that region. to try to get a United States of the Spanish Americas when you have guys out there that say the only way that you can really come to a decision is somebody has to go to the top of staircase and get their head cut off. (laughs) - You're uncackled that I like it, that's just summed. It's just unfortunately, it was already the 1840s and they said we can't have guys out there staying, we gotta wait till Fumun and cut somebody's hair off. - Glad to see you. - Unfortunately that's not how we get the vote, it's time. - So they complicate things. - Go back, let's go back and we'll send for you. - Yeah, right. - But they wouldn't do that and then the whole thing just fell apart and then the kid died of tuberculosis. - Cultural differences, racial differences. - So I'm saying, regional differences seem to really, really, we're a big thorn in his dream. - It's just what it is. - It didn't work out the way that he thought. - Yeah. - And unfortunately he died kind of politically isolated and it didn't work out and sort of, yeah you can't, unfortunately you're not gonna get far when you got people asking do Mule's count his currency. (laughing) - Glad to see you. - It's not gonna work, they're not trying to bar it, it's the 1830s, they said guys we're trying to have a constitution here, we're trying to be like the United States. - Right, right. - I'm coming in here, you know, with spears and sandals, it's not gonna work. - You're gonna need it with 14 ears of corn, I don't know what to do with that. - I don't know what to do with that. - Yeah. - And no, I can't count your wildlife, I can't count your livestock as people, okay? You got a monkey with this face painted the same as you, it's not gonna work for us, okay? You got your kids in a basket on your head, unfortunately, we're trying to do real stuff here when uniforms. - You're right. (laughing) - Right, right. So. - Nick, am I wrong? - Yeah, he has to say you're wrong. - Tell me the truth. - Yeah. - Am I wrong about that? - You're right. - Thank you. (laughing) - Um, yeah, I mean it's just so, that's just how it happened. It didn't go down the same way George Washington went down, but he is basically the George Washington of South America if George Washington had failed. - Yeah. - And it's just we are not saying we're right or wrong here, I understand that people can disagree, we're just reporting the facts as we see them. - At the way we see them. - History. - That's the important part. It's the way we see. - History is interpreted all differently. I mean, the facts are the same, but the interpretation is what makes a historian a historian. - That's what it is. So that's what I think happened a little bit. And then, you know, but we did get the nation of Bolivia, it's named after a volleyball. - It is, and that's nice. - It's an absolute, uh, Banana Republic. - Yeah. - And Venezuela is absolutely in trouble. Colombia is not that great. - Yeah, I think Peru does good. - Now, the Peru does pretty good. - Chile does good, right? They got gas, I think. - Yeah. - They got coffee. - Colombia does great. - Is Colombia doing great? - Colombia doesn't do great. - Not great. - I mean, well, it's great if you want to go down there for a little batch of party to Medellin. - Yeah. - You're always doing good. - 99% energy efficient. - So much energy they're sharing with Argentina and Brazil. - Yeah. - Wow. - So those, well, Brazil's doing great. They're part of those out. What's at blocks? The new currency. - Bricks. - Bricks, sorry. They're not doing as good as Argentina's rebounding kind of night. - Argentina's, who's number one Latin American country economy? - I can't. - Is it Argentina? - No, it's either Chile or Uruguay or Uruguay. Which one is doing the best? Maybe Argentina is the biggest. - Right. - I mean, Brazil definitely has-- - So Uruguay is safe to go to. Uruguay is good. - First world country, right? - Yeah. - Yeah. - Yeah, the biggest economy is Brazil. - Well, that's 'cause it's the biggest country. - I think I've got the biggest bots. - Yeah. Do you know that there's, it's like 300 million people. - Brazil's big points. It's the youngest country. I've never been out there, I've never been out there. - Oh, okay. - No. - Long flight. - No, do you ever want to go? - No, I don't know. Maybe. I would go with the family. I don't want to go like by myself. - Yeah. - Mexico's doing good. - Yeah. - Central by myself. - Central by nature. - Nades. - So, I would, I just would. - I know. - I would. - I bring AIDS back to my family. - Yeah. - So, I think, yeah, 'cause, and you know, in a way, keep scrolling, Jesse, I'm curious. - Let's see. - How about per capita? Which country's doing the best per capita? - Per capita, yeah. Uruguay, I didn't realize they were doing it that well. That's good to know. - Yeah. I mean, Guyana is the best. - Oh, Guyana, 'cause they got, they're right next to Brazil. - Yeah, those, those are Indians. You know, the Guyanese are the ones who rule it or-- - Dude, we'll find an ex-girlfriend who was Guyana. - Yeah. - It was a little Guyana as a big part of Queens. - Yeah, they got, what, they have some natural resource. What did they find? - They, they border with Venezuela. - Yeah, and they got, they have, they-- - Oh, do they, am I wrong about that? Or they border with Brazil? - No, they border with Venezuela. You're right. And there's actually some dispute. There was actually some dispute about the discovered oil off of Guyana that Maduro wanted it. - Yeah. - So, Guyana's got oil. - Guyana's girl says, Guyana's girls can be pieces. - Yes, yes. - Guyana is now Guyana is a country that Indian, they were the native people and the slave population became a race. - Yeah. - There was a big, big, big Guyana needs, like revolt. Guy, I'm telling you, my ex-girlfriend is Guyana. She's gorgeous. She's Indian. They look Indian. - Yeah, and they speak. - Quick, like, like, like, like, like-- - Yeah, they speak like a Trinidad de Bego. - Trinidad. - Goodbye. - Rambaroti. - Yeah, that's like a mixture of booty, booty, booty, booty. And, booty, booty, booty, booty, booty, booty, booty, booty. - One, two, three, I know. - So, you know, I'm not in. - So, you're a guy. - Nick is right. Uruguay stands out as the safest country in Latin America, lowest homicide rate in the reason. Strongest democratic institutions, low corruption, highest or near highest GDP per capita in Latin America, strong middle class, universal healthcare, solid education, stable banking system, not prone to extreme booms or busts. The trade off a small market, stable, slower growth, but it's stable. And then, like I said, Chile, economically strong, most developed infrastructure in South America, high GDP, strong institutions trade, integration. They had a little social unrest in 2019 that hurts the ability. But other than that, Chile could be number one. - Chile, the smartest girl in my physical therapy class was from Chile. - Take a look at this Costa Rica, safest, but much smaller economy. So, Costa Rica is the safest. - The boys went down to Costa Rica and let me tell you they had a good time. They had a good time down there, huh? - Yeah, and I saw some pictures and it looked like great time. What did you see? - I saw some loopholes. - You saw a couple of loopholes. - Yes, I saw some fruit loopholes. - Yeah, now, cause, and also, too, on the Patreon, I want to talk a little bit about James Monroe, with you know, Monroe Doctrine, how it ties into Nicholas Maduro. - Yeah. - So, and we have a lot of fun stuff at the Patreon. A lot of things we had to cut out this episode and we, me and Janice Redd, I ran out the text that Janice and I had this weekend. And those are only at patreon.com/historyinus for everyone's safety, so go listen. - And yeah, I mean, the Monroe Doctrine was a thing that was, you know, James Monroe did. And now it seems like we're in the Don Road, Doctrine. - Yeah, we're in the Donald Trump Doctrine and it's probably not as good, but it's a lot more fun if you're on our side. - It's definitely the memes are better. - Yeah, okay, so as always, as we did all of last year, we'll continue this year. You join at patreon.com/historyinus. You make a funny name, you get it read out at the end of the episode, the winner, the PPW, the pseudo penis of the week. And then at the end of the year, we will pick the grand winner of them all, but in order to win or be involved in any of this, you got to join patreon.com/historyinus. So, welcome to the matriarchy. Wife puts on the earmuffs and blindfold when she goes down on me. We call it doing the Helen Coward. - Put her on the list. Wow, so we have somebody coming out of the game for the number, that's a good start to the year. It's the very first name off the list, the very first name gets on the list. - That's a great omen for our 2020 things. Harbinger, not an omen. Colin, operated Frisbee, Michelle Brito, Thomas Adams, Latter-day Taint, okay, great. - Latter-day Taint's a chicken finger. - There it is, like the Latter-day Saints. - Yep, Preston Karen, Michael Torres, Bert Kreischer's liver looks like a leaboy, okay? - Waysong Shea. - Braxler. - Braxler. - Steamy, dreamy R and Cheney. - So cute. - Orange Cheney balls are nice. - Yeah, there's cute. - It kind of looks like a piece, too. - Yeah. - We need another category called cute, the girls. That was cute one. Jesus and the Lady Brain Boys fixed my leaky roof. - The Lady Brain Boys. - They call us the Lady Brain Boys. That's very funny. - Very funny, yeah. The Lady Brain Boys, I'm gonna drag so that. - That's right, all right. - We're the Lady Brain Boys? - Yeah, we're the Lady Brain Boys. - I like the Lady Brain Boys. - Have you heard that before? - No. They said Jesus and the Lady Brain Boys fixed my leaky roof. - I'm putting that on the list, actually. - I'm like wow. - Calling me and you, the Lady Brain Boys. - It's funny. - Instead of the hearty boys. - Yeah. - It's a goody. - Funny. - Then we got, don't tell my dad. - Okay. - Yeah. - Yeah. - Spaghetti, blowing gaze, Zeus with the moose knuckle, Jared from Subway, not the salmon chop, just a kid who's always commuting. (laughing) - Drexler. - Drexler, it's funny. - Very funny. - Marcus Hill, oh, got a black kid. - Yeah. - Nice, welcome. - Hard R Cafe. - Okay, that's Woken One. - Wow, you know what I'm sorry about that? - Yep. - Eastern Hemie, salsa monkey, AK, walked into one. - Good, oh, that's a good one. - Yeah, what is it in Wild? How like I say, walk and roll. - Yeah. - And then there's walked into one. I didn't see this. - And it happens almost every episode. Something we said that we think is for the first, it's like the Simpsons, how they predict stuff. - Yeah, it means it's in the air, means you're tuned in. - Tuned in. - Means you may be on the beam, even though you think you're off. - Even though I'm off. And you know what actually was very comforting, 'cause I was really, I literally cried in the gym yesterday. I literally, I have like a little space in my house where I have a little gym in there, you know, like weights or whatever. And I was crying looking in the mirror and Jasmine came in and was like, Like, what's going on? Why were you crying in your program? Because I really, I put on weight. I felt like I got myself back in shape a few months ago and I said, I won't let myself slip again. And then I slipped and I said, I can't control it. What's happening to me? Do I need to go on GLPs? I don't know. And I just was like, it was like one of those things, like Heather Graham putting the cupcakes in her face and just screaming at the mirror. And she just came down, rub my back. She had brought me some biscuits that, so she didn't give those to me. And so she said, why don't you do this, Chris? Why don't you take some pressure off yourself? You're doing good. She was like, okay, I still think you look great. Why don't you just, it's January 5th. She was like, why don't you just give yourself to March 15th, these next two months to just get back into the place that you were feeling a few months ago. It'll still be winter. You don't have to get in shape right now tomorrow for anything. So why don't you just give yourself some grace and that really helped me to just say, you know what, okay, maybe I gotta slow down a little bit. I have two questions. Go things, go. Now subconsciously, do you think it's possible that you were crying because it was January 5th, which is almost the eve of the anniversary of January 6th and January 6th didn't work. And so you're sad about that. Could be that. And then my second question is, if you're sitting in your home gym, crying in the mirror. Yeah. At any point do you think yourself, this might be a time where I need to go Google where some therapists are. Yeah, I mean, maybe it's time for roof check. Well, it's January 6th and I've already cried three times this year. So that's not great. Now, are we thinking about maybe just a roof? Well, a roof, I think a couple of shingles might be loose. Well, also too, I've realized that every single day since Christmas Eve, I've had at least one sip of alcohol. So that's not great either. And that's also not like me. That's 13, 14 days. I mean, yesterday I went to Peter Lucas and I smashed two German brews. Well, out of nowhere. By the way, it's not like we're going out to dinner. I mean, I went out to dinner with my family, but it's not like we're celebrating anything. I'm just having brews. Right. Does that ever happen to you? No. Jesse, you drink a cocktail every day, right? I used to. I just actually stopped doing that. Yeah, I was doing that for a really long time and then-- Seven days a week. Yeah, I would have a drink every night when I came home before dinner. Jesse's throwing hands with Sergio now. Yeah, throwing hands. Which is available to all our fans. If you want to get your shape and you live in New York or Westchester, go throw hands with Sergio. Go throw hands with Sergio and ask your money, but it's worth it. And I could tell you from experience, me, Jesse, and Yannis knowing Sergio for upwards of 15 years and us being very, very close friends to him, I can comfortably tell you that he does not give discounts. No, he does not give discounts at all. He also, if you're really serious about it, he will punch in the face 'cause after you left, we sparred. I took a jab squarely into the nose to the point where I stopped and I said, "I'll sue you." Yeah, yeah, yeah, I told you. I said, "I'll sue you." Did I not tell you he was in a bad mood that day? He said, "I have a white client and I will sue you." Yeah, because what happened was is I was sparring with Sergio the session before Yannis and I warned Yannis, 'cause I was three clock session, he was the four clock session. I said, "He's searching in a bad mood, be careful." And then he punched you in the face. 'Cause he punched, I caught a jab straight to the nose that it made my eyes tear and I turned around, I wanted to cry. Yeah, I actually wanted to cry. It's what it is. It hurt. Yeah, yeah, 'cause Sergio, I'm gonna sue you. I'm gonna sue you. I'm gonna sue you. Yeah, I hope that your tactics aren't good 'cause Tulsi Gabbard's a fan of the pod. Yeah. Okay, so here we go. All right, so we're back. Isn't it funny though that I really do believe she's listening right now? Yeah, and she's a patient, I love her. She followed Chris and me at the same time and that must mean she's tuning in. So how you doing? You will get fucking cracked open! Fourteen. Hot. Eastern Hemi, salsa monkey, AK walked into one. Is that on the list? Walked into one? That's the one. That's the one. That's the one. That's the one. That's the one. We got sucking the fed at out of Yannis's lamb skewer. Okay. Then we got Rufi Leakey. How funny is it that we just had a call? That's media now. I mean, she was just on fucking MSNBC and then we just went to that fucking. Yeah, so that's in YouTube and then yeah, if you just heard that, we're bouncing back and forth here. Jesse's got what we call a job to do. Take that and plug that Maduro that into where we were talking about Maduro. Yeah, Jesse's gonna need a Tangerine to calm the fuck down after this episode. Now we got Mamdani's meat missile. Wait, that's a chicken finger. Chicken finger. Then we have Italian and Texas, call me Hente Vinny. Okay. Hente Vinny, I like Hente Vinny. I like that chicken finger. Rock hard on her ring camera. Say for it, please text me back. Okay. Dustin Oaks, Chris Cipriano, David Hromos. Each bind, I'm Jude and history hyenas. Uba Alstuth from Fuirland. Okay, we read that flawlessly off instinct. I think it's just in me, right? In there, yeah. Visiting Greece to see the sights and sea necks. Okay. Wow, 14, sea necks. You know, that's a walked into one, but that's one that you created. Yes, that's one of the sand castles you built. Yeah. Shabbat Shalom, I'm here for the Frisbee orgy in your home. Oh, hi, Jesse. (laughs) It's not 14. Rexler. Straight to the back, but gang in both holes. Okay. Put them on the list. There it is. Interesting. Yeah, 'cause some people are gay in only one hole. They only do blow. He's our guys. Yeah, but he does both. 'Cause are you gay in one hole? I'm gay in one hole. 'Cause I think I'm not doing it in the butt. Yeah, our fans help us sometimes with some of the jargon. That is now going into the history of how you did his lexicon. Sabrina the Ahina, gay in both holes. Gay in both holes means he's a fully charged $3 bill. Yeah. And gay in one hole means he's bicurious. What it is. Found out my wife used to love purple crayons. It's what it is. I don't know what that means. It's funny. Okay. Sookrit Tripathi, Francisco Gamboa. Brett Bukola-Tur, Joseph Polatowski, A.K. Parogi Monkey. Jocelyn Sing Carpet Rides to the White Boy Fred party. Okay. What's up for a friend? I'll have to do a part. Got it. You fired it again. I fired it twice. Yeah, we're gonna, we're gonna Drexler, but it was really funny. Should I put that on the list? No, it's just a little hard. It's a little challenging, a friend. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Chrissy Cum Shot, Matthew Baskol. When Yanni tucks back, his front bomb has fumes. Okay. Jay The Wizard, Chrissy Chlamidian. Oh, like Chlamidian Chlamidian. Good try. Good try. Very good try. What the hell did I sign up for? That's an interesting question. That's a good question. Yeah. It's gonna be a wild ride, my friend. Corey Stazin, Paul Maynard Jr., Mexican Jumping Bean, A.K. Border Bunny. Okay. Okay. Daniel Clark, Akasha is wide. Oh, Daniel Clark. It might be, I worked with him in fusion, and he was also on some, he was, that show that, if it's actually Daniel Clark, he was on the show that, that, what's the rapper from Canada? I'm just blanking. From Drake? Drake. The one that Drake was on when he was a little. Oh, yeah. He was on that show? He was one of the homestrops from that show. Look, Daniel Clark. And you could be his guy. That was friends with him. Yeah. It's a hottie. Yeah, there he is. Now he's a news producer, and we worked their fusion together. Which is funny, 'cause we just had Mariano. There it is, Daniel Clark. He's a professor in dipettus moment. You're in. If it's the real Daniel Clark. And he does you do comedy, too? No, no, that's another day. No, Marit Hart, then we got Aakonsha's wife's cheeks get more claps than his standup. That's what it is. That's what we do. That's what we do. Then his standup. We can't do it. Yes, sorry. It's a good roast joke. And we're dispressed. This isn't a friend in here. It's not a court of law. So we don't, we can't condone. We can't make a judgment on that. Yeah, if it's just no, I'll tell you this. I'll do this. If we, if there is something that we get invited to the roast of Aakonshaing, we will use that as a joke. We will use it as a joke, 'cause it is a good one. Politicus. Then we got Epstein and Maxwell Vacation Rental Service. Then we got Ethan Cock. Like Ethan Hawke. Ethan Cock? Okay. Saudi's own more comedians than oil. That's true. Okay, very true. Gumadio Chalmers, aka Miami Feet Glue Guy. Like Mario Chalmers. Gumadio Chalmers. Rex, the big time. A little too inside, 'cause a lot of people don't know who Mario Chalmers is. Gosh, do you want to go to Miami and just do a live show down there? Yeah. Y'all. Just go down there. Gosh. Cesar Hoolacha, sky burns, then I'll come and pad C.U. in a different way. Okay. Derek Gonzalez, Malik Black. Oh, there you go. John Chrissie walked into hard pasta monkey cock Alvarez. David Schmidt. Then we got voted for Mamdani because my wife got fat. What about the list? Yeah, I mean, that's a 10, I mean a lot of fat ladies like Mamdani. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. So, um, each New York parogi monkey watching Planet of the Apes PS, I don't have a TV. Okay. Oh, shit. Yeah, I thought it was okay. We don't condone that. Stop it. Stop that. Michael Napp and Frank's checker board. My dick. Wait, I'm trying to figure that one out. Checker's board. Yeah. And Frank's checker's board. I don't know. No. No. My dick don't reach, but she calls it a piece, something don't add up cause, okay? Abum music. Kids got a small piece in his opinion, but she says it's a fish. So what it is. Yeah. Abum using shrimp as a Bluetooth earpiece. It's at least. I think I've already put on a list. Yeah. I think you got to list that. Just funny visual. Yeah. Um. Hail. Glua. Captain Navarro. Fisbee on Staten, Towel in Manhattan, Waysung Shiite. Waysung Shiite on its own would have been on the list. Yeah. My AI girlfriend left me for a Leroy. Very funny Drexler. Blood, Banco Dracula, Mamdani's personal six year old ham candle. Waysung Shiite. - You can't do it. - Muslim reference, no good. - Shannon Fleming. - Can't do that for our safety reasons. - Lil Chombie, but a Dece Beaver beater. - Really like it. - Beaver beater's funny. - Beaver beater's funny, it's a Drexler. - Okay. - Brandon Gaskowian, new Jew in your shoe, leaving new Jew glue, Lada 14. New Jew in your shoe alone would have been good. - Yeah, but yeah, almost. - Ebenees are splouged in not so tiny Tim Dylan. - Okay. - Tomorrow, Charlie Kurt. - That would've got a big laugh at it, Nick. I saw his stomach start to jingle. - Which one, Bill Moral? - No, the Tim Dylan. - Tim Dylan. - Read one more time. I wanna see if he moves again. (laughing) (laughing) - God. - Oh shit, they got me with a curve watch. - Shit, I didn't wanna read that. - All right, smooth masterbator. The Joe Chode gang experience. Omar Valencia, Ugly Waffle. The Leroy got my bike for Christmas. Oh. - Okay. - Another one walk. - Waysong she ain't. - Black baby, no dad that's called a cocoa felon. - Waysong she ain't. - Not good, walked into one. - Not great, but hold up a second. Hold up a second. Just hold up one second. - Lada 14. - Okay. - That is the best one so far. Playing on cocoa melons. - Yeah, I mean, it's tough to you 'cause it's your call, but it's a walked in one. - It is definitely a walked in one. What do you do there? That is the funniest one. - Jesse's laughing hard. - He's losing it. Nick, not so much. What is that called? - Nick Lyster is that one. - Thumbs up. - Thumbs up. - All right, thanks on it's on. - I mean, sometimes you just gotta supersede the walked in one 'cause it's just too good. - It's good, good, yeah. - Undisputed bento boxer, Ville Garago. Hitler's undescended right testicle. - I like that. - Muhammad, my foreskin didn't stand a chance, Rashad. - Dressler. Fumails, daycare, sorry, no vacancy. AG to FYI. The boys are back like Oasis. - Yeah. - Sam Roberts undescended testicle. - It's a lot of undescended testicles. Jackie Onassis and Titz got brain on Zacute Film. Oz Pearl Necklace. - Or Oz Pearl Necklace. - Yeah. - A story of a kid, Tuddy's Tax Attorney. Yani gains a chromosome when he shaves. - Okay, that look retarded with a beard. - Yeah. - 'Cause is AOC that Latin fume piece in the rep house. - Wow. - Paris Morales. Donnie T. Please build the UK a wall major sandstorm. (laughing) - And that's walked in one, I bite you not whatever. - Momu, Hamid, Moe problems. - A lot of 14. - Yes. - Yeah. - What do we do at that? - I mean, we just gotta let that one go. - Gotta let go. - Yeah. - Jose, Josh Mann, Savage, Richard Sass. Make no mistake, Weiner Dogs are for the table. Evading lunacy. White Walker closed the gate behind me. - I like that. - Yeah. - I'm gonna put that on the list. - Okay. - If you don't remember from the first rite, a white walker, someone who lives on the other side of the wall. - Yeah. - A Mexican. - Yeah. - Max Galanti, then we got branded Van No Strind. Elon Musk is South African, hide your frisbees. - Jappine, call him a microwaveable burrito. - Sean. - Oh, that's walked in one night. - Yeah. - Yeah, I mean 14. - That's definitely from the fire house. Some of these are coming directly from the fire house. - That's what it is. - It's hefty, shlong, dinger. - Captain now, daycare center, closed until further notice. And then last but not least, frankly, laser beams are awful at customer service. - A lot of 14. - Okay. - We read enough names, right, you think? - Got it now. - Yeah. - All right, so here's the list so far. Voted from Mamdani because my wife got fat. A bum using shrimp as a Bluetooth earpiece. What, that was good. - Wife puts on the earmuffs and blindfolded. Wife puts on the earmuffs and blindfolded when she goes down on me. We call it doing the Helen Keller. Jesus and the ladybrain boys fix my leaky roof. Straight to the back, but gain both holes. - It's a good one. - Black baby, no dad, that's called a cocoa felon. And white walker close the gate behind me. - Okay, okay. Let's start from the top here. We're going to start Drax luring. - Voted from Mamdani because my wife got fat. - It's a goody, but we're going to drax luring. - Okay. It is true though. - A lot of, you know, a bum using shrimp as a Bluetooth earpiece. - We're going to keep that around. - Okay. - We're going to Drax luring, but welcome to the lexicon. We are the ladybrain boys. - That's the new name, that could be the new name of the pond. - Yeah. - Wife puts on the earmuffs and blindfolded when she goes down on me. - We're going to Drax luring. - Okay. - Any other day, guys. - That's a good one. We're going to Drax luring, but welcome to the lexicon. - Yeah, good. Black baby no dad, that's called a cocoa felon. - Unfortunately, we got to keep that one around. - What is? - And then white walker closed the gate behind me. - We're going to, we're going to dress for that. - Hard to do. - So then it is between a bum using, I'm sorry, it's between a bum using shrimp as a Bluetooth earpiece. - Yeah. It is a black baby no dad, that's called a cocoa felon. That's, I'm sorry, those are the two. It's between black baby no dad, that's called a cocoa felon. And a bum using shrimp as a Bluetooth earpiece. - You know what, I'm just going for funny here. I'm not going for morality or political correctness. - Okay. - In my opinion, am I wrong? I'm just going to-- - It may just, it broke, Jesse. - Yeah, Nick of the two. - Yeah, that's the cocoa felon. - Yeah. - Guys, we do comedy here. That's all that it is, it's just a joke, you know? But congratulations, you are the first winner of 2026, black baby no dad, that's called a cocoa felon. You are the PPWC, you name up in lights at history. Hyenas is back.com. Go get the merch, tell your friends. This episode continues at Patreon.