The transcript explores a series of personal relationship stories, each highlighting different emotional challenges. One features a woman leaving a birthday dinner due to her boyfriend’s mother’s possessive and disrespectful behavior, which leads to a rift in their relationship. The man fails to support her, showing poor emotional accountability. Another story involves a young man in a hospital suffering a traumatic brain injury, devastated when his girlfriend attends prom with another man, despite his deep commitment. His emotional pain underscores the difficulty of long-distance relationships and the need for mutual support. A third story centers on a board game dispute where a woman ends a three-year relationship after a minor trade in Catan, revealing that while the event was the catalyst, deeper unaddressed emotional issues were at fault. Finally, a story about a best friend’s proposal speech reveals that every detail about the partner’s actions actually describes the narrator, exposing a profound emotional misalignment. These stories collectively emphasize the importance of emotional awareness, communication, and mutual respect in relationships—especially when cultural, familial, or situational dynamics create conflict. Wise is introduced as a financial tool that supports global living through transparent, fair currency exchange, contrasting with the emotional struggles shared in the personal narratives.
Support comes from wise, the smart way to manage the currencies you need around the world. Your life is global. Your money should be too. Some providers promise no fees on overseas transfers. Don't be fooled. Extra costs often hide and blow to exchange rates. Choose wise. You can send, spend, and receive money in over 40 currencies. Count on the exchange rate that you'd usually see on Google. That's how millions save billions on hidden fees. Be smart. Get wise. Visit wise.com. T's and C's apply. This episode of Reddit Stories is sponsored by DoorDash. Got you delivered. DoorDash. Hi. Welcome to Smoshreads Reddit Stories. I'm Shane. And today's theme is Relationships. And I am joined by two lovely people who I think in their life have maybe experienced a relationship, or two, or three. I don't know. Yeah. Maybe. A rock shan Damian are here. Couple, hey everybody. We've had lots of relationships. So we've got a bunch of relationship stories today. I like the producers put in a little note of like very what would you do coded relationship stories. John Kenyones. Okay. It's right over there. Yes. I'm particularly excited for this because I've been watching couples therapy again. Oh, you love them. Oh, cool. I am fascinated by relationships. It was what like inspired me to go study psychology. Oh, really? It's like it's like human behavior, but I really am fascinated by like not like romantic relationships, particularly just relationships between people. Like the connection. The connection communication, like how so much of it is vibes, but so much of it is kind of like simple things that build up. I totally agree. I totally agree. It's just interesting how like, especially in a larger group, how like some people tend to gravitate toward each other and form their own circles. It's just it is it's interesting. It's really cool. And some people are like kind of like the outsider, like the rebel of the group. They kind of marches to the beat of their own drum. Yeah. Yeah. Well, similarly, but actually not at all. I started watching Love Island last night. Oh, yeah. As of recording this, it just started. So by the time this airs in July, all of the cast members will have been cancelled. Is this the American one? Yeah, I am saying this now that I'm like, I shouldn't watch it, but I know by the time this airs, I'm going to be hooked. You have to. The pilot was juicy last night. Already? Uh-huh. Like your season. Everybody's kissed everybody. I will say like just human connection is just as a human you're fast. I am fascinated by it. Yeah. I always love the UK version. And I think that was the version that appealed to me most because people are so polite in general until things blow up. Yeah. I think the moment it became like Love Island US. I'm like, well, yeah, I know what's going to happen. It's coming a little too reality TV at times. Yeah. Still probably going to still iconic. All right. Well, let's see how juicy these stories are. Our first story comes from Am I the asshole? Uh, underscore would I be the asshole? underscore public? There's so many different Am I the asshole? Understand Kingdom Hearts title of that? Yeah. Yeah. Shot hack sign. Um. Yeah. This is supposed to April of 2025. Am I the asshole for leaving my boyfriend B day dinner after his mom took my seat? So am I the asshole for leaving my boyfriend's birthday dinner after his mom took my seat? Okay. Ooh. I love when it's not so clear cut and we get to have a discussion about this. A mom has to wait to one minute from how it's like the mom physically picked me up and threw me. Yeah. And it's not clear cut. And I don't know who's the wrong right. I a 25 year old woman had been dating my boyfriend Matt a 27 year old man for almost two years. His family is very close and his mom in particular has always been a little possessive. I've tried not to make a big deal out of it, but it's clear she doesn't like that I take up his time. And she's made passive aggressive comments like, I hope I don't lose my son to some girl. Even though we've been together for a while and I've made every effort to be kind and respectful to her. Anyway, last weekend was Matt's birthday. He invited me to dinner and his family at a nice restaurant. I dressed up, got him a gift I knew he'd love and was honestly looking forward to the night. When we arrived, I noticed his mom had saved the seat right next to him for herself. That's fine, whatever. I sat on his other side. But right before we ordered, his mom made a joke about how I always need to be next to Matt and said, let's see how you handle a little separation. Then she literally stood up, looked at me and said, scooch sweetie, motioning for me to move down a seat so she could sit between us. Everyone at the table laughed, Matt included. I was so stunned I just quietly got up and moved. For about five minutes I sat there feeling small and humiliated while she leaned over Matt like he was her date. So I stood up, grabbed my bag and said, actually, I think I'm going to head out. Hope you have a great birthday Matt and I left. Matt blew up my phone later saying I completely overreacted embarrassed him in front of his family and can't take a joke. His mom texted me, sorry you were so sensitive message which just made it worse. I need to calm down. I need to calm down. I need to say a lot. It's okay, Roger. It's not clear cut. It's not clear cut. Yeah, this could be this could go anyway. We do not know. We need more context. Not clear cut. It's not clear cut. Now he's not speaking to me until I apologize. I honestly feel like they were the rude ones but it was his birthday dinner. So now I'm second guessing everything. Well, guess what, Matt? It was your last birthday because I'm going to kill you. Damn. That's. I. Yeah. It's not clear cut. It's not clear cut. I think do you think everybody at this birthday just lives in terror of Matt's mom because they all laughed. They all laughed like they're just like, "Ha ha ha ha ha." If that twilight zone episode where the kid can distort reality. So it was like, "Yes, Billy, we all love it, Billy. I understand you to the cornfield again." And she did. One step away from Matt was the proverbial cornfield. Yes. And that's not good. Saying like, "Oh, you're just always hanging around him." It's like, "Yeah, she's his girlfriend." Right. Like, it's a birthday. The girlfriend or boyfriend sits next to. This is the worst. This is the worst kind of thing that comes up in these stories is when there's a mom that is jealous of your kid's partner. Yeah. Like, those are completely different feelings. It's a completely different department. You're blending all of it. You're making it weird. Yeah. Like, by calling it out and being like, "You always want to be next to him." Like, "That's so wild." And sorry, didn't she say that she reserved the seat next to Matt on the other side for herself? Yes. The mom was on one side of Matt. She was here. Yeah. She was here. And then the mom literally was like, "Move down and I'm gonna now switch over to here." Yeah. So clearly was not about the mom being close to Matt. It was about making sure that she's farther away. Yeah. Exactly. But the important part that we need to discuss is that it's still Matt's fault. It is. Yeah. Because Matt didn't say anything. He did not say anything. And everybody laughed. And he laughed too. And then he texted her. Oh. Blaming her for it. You're overreacting. Yeah, I do think this is unfortunately one of those situations. She stood her ground. She basically communicated this like, this is insane. Right. And he's not taking it seriously. So it is one of those things of like, this is gonna take a lot of work for him to unwind. He clearly doesn't want to. So you. Yeah, that's not her joke. You either deal with this forever or you got it. And that I think is such an important point because this is just a birthday dinner. What's the wedding going to be? Oh my god. That would be a nightmare. What's the pregnancy announcement going to look like? Like, you know, if they choose to have kids, like the mom is going to be rushing in being like, "Oh my god, I'm so excited." And she's going to be pushed to the side. I'm actually in labor. I'm do a birthday. Maybe. Yes. Yeah. That's the tough thing about relationships in general. And a lot of people discover it for the first time with like roommates when you're just moving out of, you know, your family home for the first time. Yeah. You are raised in a different environment and the set of rules that you have of like, what is normal is going to be completely different than someone else is normal. So like, we hear this, we go, "Whoa." And OP hears this and goes, "Oh my god, I can't believe this is happening." But everyone around the table is like laughing like, "Yeah, that's how it goes." Yeah. You know, you brought up the like, "Oh, I wonder if they were like, but I feel like in that moment, I'd be looking for anybody's eye contact of like, isn't this fucking crazy? No, are we all seeing this? It's hard because you're just not going to change like nine people's minds. Totally, totally. And you just feel so alone, too, because then you're like, "Then I must be the crazy one." Yeah. If everything isn't reacting like that, but she's certainly not. In fact, I actually really respect the way that she handled it, too. I like that she took a few minutes. And she realized like, I'm feeling shitty. I'm probably going to ruin this dinner if I stay here and like, make a big fuss out of it. That's the worst feeling of like, if I stay, it's going to be awful, but if I go, it's going to make a scene. But she, I think she handled it like in a professional way, truly just being like, "I hope you have a great dinner." Like, I should excuse myself and get out. And it's his birthday. This is his family. But in kind of that way, I mean, this is maybe just how I view things. But like, if I'm at a family event and I bring a friend or like, you know, if I bring my girlfriend, my wife, and I'm like, I kind of do feel responsible. But I'm like, I'm like, this is my family. You're kind of the outside one here. Yeah. So like, we have our norms. We have what's ever. So like, I'm going to take care of this side. So like, being humiliated publicly in front of not your family is so like. Yeah. What is that? Like, sweetie scooch over. No. That's the power. No. That's a stupid power. And like, look, I'm very close with my mom. We've been through a lot.
love my mom. We have a great relationship. And she's like a big part of my life. But never once have I been dating someone and she's been like, they're gonna take you away. Like, it's always been like, hey, if you are happy, I am happy that's all I care about. I hope you get to come visit soon. Because your closeness should not have to do with anybody else in your life. Exactly. Those are completely separate and this mother is like choosing to feel threatened by his girlfriend, which is just weird. It's fucking weird. Yeah, it's I've never understood it because my dynamic with my mom is nothing like that either. But I hear I read these types of stories all the damn time. And I'm just like, what is going on? It's really gross. It's upsetting too, because they've been together for a while. So it's like surely, surely this has had to have come up in some way. And she's had to express like she's not feeling. Yeah. Well, she was saying she's like, I sort of ignored it. Before, was just a breaking point. You know, it's there's I always have a hard time finding that line too of like when to speak up when something is uncomfortable. Or like, you know, ah, maybe I should just let it chill for a second. I want it to call out everything. But like after two years, it turns into this. And this is also again a bigger I think attack. It isn't just like, oh, she was sitting there and I was like upset. Like she literally called her out at this dinner. Yeah, she didn't do and she didn't even throw the first move. The mom attacked her. Yeah. And for partners not standing with her, I ultimately think it's inappropriate. And I think the grounds of leaving totally valid. I think they are at two years if the family dynamic is that toxic. And he is okay with it. Yes. It is like, where do you see this relationship going? He just doesn't see the problem. My hope for this person would be like after, you know, this clearly is going to be a breakup. You know, maybe that happens again in a few years. And then he starts to go, wait a minute. Like, but were they don't learn? And they're just sad forever. And then it's everyone else's fault. Yeah. Or they unfortunately find someone who tolerates it. Like, is afraid. Like, it is important to like stand your ground with these things. Yeah. They do not get better. They absolutely do not get better. In fact, they will, like you mentioned, like the wedding. Like the pregnancy, like, like they are going to get worse and worse. So you have to, you have to take it seriously. Yeah. You have to take it seriously. I think even in the smaller examples before it gets easier. Agreed. Agreed. But there's not zero hope for Matt. I think he could, if there's an update, I think he could possibly understand, realize, and be like, I need to have some conversations with my family and turn it around. Because it's a scary thing to confront your family. Of course. And you also, it takes a lot of unwinding, right? Because it's like, it's like, it's a learned behavior. This was your normal problem. Yes, you didn't know that it was inappropriate. It's always fascinating as you get older, like you meet your friends, families, or you talk to your friends, or especially when you're dating or in a relationship. And you learn how different families can be. Yes. And you also learn, like, whoa, I grew up thinking this was normal. Yeah. And it's like, and it's not. Right. That all totally. I also think he failed her not going after her in that moment of just like, which is like, have a good dinner. I would have had that moment of like, maybe pause and be like, hey guys, I'm so sorry, I'm going to check on her real quick. Right. And then like hop out to the parking lot and be like, hey, what's going on, can we talk as opposed to like 30 minutes later? He's texting me like, think about Matt. He literally just saw that happen went crazy. Anyway, I'll do the duck all around. Okay, and wait, and speaking of the text too, we need to talk about the mom's text of sorry that you are sensitive. Well, yeah, fuck her. She fucking sucks. Yeah, so he's surprised. I, okay, I don't know if I would block a report or call the police. Report. No, here's, here's also the issue. It's like, if we want to take this a deeper level. We do. Imagine if Matt was apologetic and he is cool, but he's like, but this is my mom and I still love her. But like, I hear you, it's like, that is your mother-in-law. Like, that is your potential mother-in-law. Can you handle that? Like, and I think it's fair for people to go, I love my boyfriend, but my god, if his family treats me this way. And this like, can I handle that? And it's like, I don't, I would understand if someone was like, I can't, I can't. Okay, so the verdict, there's no official verdict, but because the subreddit, oh, because the OG subreddit was deleted. This subreddit no longer exists. The mom found it. Yeah. She was like, could you just scourge the trash? But the comments are leaning towards not the asshole, so, which seems fair, comments not the asshole, have you ever talked to your boyfriend about his mother's behavior? If not, then he may see this pettiness on her part as a one-off. However, that doesn't fully excuse his reaction. Don't apologize to anyone if you want to keep seeing your boyfriend, then talk to him about his mother. If he's receptive at all, then it might be worth working things out. If he refuses to hear or accept anything about his mother's behavior, then you might reconsider this relationship. Yeah. Someone said, off. Sorry, you were so sensitive, says it all, at least to me. She didn't acknowledge doing anything wrong. It's too bad that your boyfriend isn't looking out for you in this. Oh, he said, yeah, it's actually crazy. He still hasn't spoken to me, and it's been like two days. What? You're broken by, so I'm going to just drop his things off at his house, and that's the end of this relationship, yeah. That's tough, but at least he made the decision easier. Yeah. Like you said, it would be hard to, you know, you're really into the relationship, but this other factor is like limiting the future. Yeah. This is clear. And can you tell her to like drop his address, like just, you know, for like reference? Yeah. You know, for us. So we know. You know, just so we know where he lives. Lastly, someone said, how could anyone laugh at that? His mother was so damn disrespectful. If I was mad, I would have blurted out what the fuck, because someone said discomfort is why the family laughed. Matt, the mother fucker, will be the topic of family gossip for years after that dinner. Unfortunate wording, but yes. I think that was intentional. Yeah. I think there's something like loosely that's hinted at that I do think is very true about relationships. And I've heard it said before is like a relationship is not tested. Like a strong relationship is not about like if things happen, like if arguments or tips or things happen. It's how you come back together. 100% and Matt has not spoken to her today. So it's like, oh, so you don't come back together. So that is how you guys handle that. And that's more than anything. It is what happened after. Right, because arguments are inevitable. You will always have some sort of conflict. Yeah, it needs to be safe to do so. Absolutely, but it's certainly how you handle it, how you're communicating, how you're like dealing with the other person and advocating for them rather than just being like, I'm right. And clearly he's showing that he's terrible with problem solving. Absolutely. Update. It's a small one, but it's an update. The next day. At least a zip code. So this is the next day. So this will have been the third day that they have not spoken to each other. I dropped his stuff off and he tried to have a talk with me and he was basically saying like, oh, his mom didn't mean any harm with the joke and telling me to chill out and that I'm being dramatic. I told him to go date his mom since she is perfect and y'all understand each other's humor. Woo, yes, queen. Why don't you go date your mom? I'm taking that. I'm going to say it in context that make no sense. Why don't you just go date your mom, bro? I think that's going to be a showstopper for a lot of conversations. I'm like, oh, ew, what? They'll be like, this is clear cut. Okay, yeah, damn. Oh my god, Arosha from Smosh, I'm such a huge fan. Go date your mom, fuck her. Fuck. Hey, I guess so. Someone commented underneath the update saying, imagine having to explain to your next partner how your previous relationship ended. She got upset when my mom forced her out of her seat at my birthday party and then laughed at her. He's not going to ever say that. He's going to say she couldn't take jokes since she was so serious in my family. Just didn't like my family. He's actually not going to have another relationship because he's going to be single and dead. I'm going to kill him and dating his mom is a zombie. Yeah, he's a shitty lifetime movie. Coming to CW for like three episodes. Yeah, zombie boy dating his own. This next story comes from relationship advice. Okay, it was posted in June. This was posted like two days ago. Oh, as of recording, this was posted like two days ago. Okay, happy bread. Happy birthday. Yeah, happy birthday, Matt. My girlfriend, who's 18, is going to prom with another guy while I, 19-year-old boy, I'm stuck in the hospital. Well, I'm stuck in the hospital and I don't know how to handle it. So again, my girlfriend is going to prom with another guy while I'm stuck in the hospital and I don't know how to handle it. Okay, so this is an 18 and 19 year olds. This is probably one of the youngest stories you could possibly read on. This is one of those where I'm like, a lot of the advice is going to be like, "You're young, so I'm just getting that out of my head." Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, I'm trying to put myself back. I didn't go to prom. Same. And I'm also 34, so I have to really, I'm really outside perspective. That's okay, you guys. I got you. Thanks, Aracha. I got you. I'm really struggling right now. I don't know how to talk to my friends about this and I could really use some outside perspective. You guys got me. A few weeks ago, I sold my gaming PC for $900 so I could buy a plane ticket and fly out to attend my girlfriend's prom. I was genuinely excited about it and seeing her. Then I got seriously injured and ended up in the hospital. I suffered a traumatic brain injury from a lacrosse game. Doctors won't let me fly until the swelling in my brain goes down. Her prom is this week, so there's basically no chance I'll make it. My girlfriend still wants to go to prom, which I completely understand. It's her senior prom and I wanted to have an amazing night. I don't want to ruin that experience for her. The problem is that
that she's now going with another guy. She's taking this guy to everything. Pre-prombed stuff, dinner, the dance, after-prombed stuff, and the after-party. He'll basically be there for the entire night. I trust her, and I don't think she's cheating on me, but the thought of waking up in a hospital bed and opening my phone to see prom pictures of my girlfriend dressed up with another guy is genuinely killing me. I've never cried over something she's done before, but I've been in tears over this. I feel guilty because I know it's not her fault, and I don't want to make her feel bad about enjoying her prom. At the same time, I feel hurt and jealous. Adding to all of this, I'm out of nearly $1,000, and I no longer have my gaming PC. I'm stuck in the hospital, and the thing I was most excited for is happening without me. Am I being unreasonable for feeling this upset? How would you handle this situation without making your partner feel guilty for something that isn't really bare-fault? - You sweet bull. - That's the most fun. - Level-headed, 19-year-old, who has a concussion and no games. What if he was an absolute asshole? And then he got a concussion, now he's like, you know, I really see that. I see that it's an out of the situation. - I'm hurt, I'm jealous. I don't want her to feel bad. - But I feel the empathy for her, and I'm new to empathy because I gave it to me. - Also now I can speak Spanish now. - I don't know what sort of episode of house. - Okay, okay, okay, this is sad. - This is really rough. - It's upsetting. - A lot of bull reasons. - I, okay, I'm trying to put myself in the shoes if I am like this guy's older brother or like a friend of his or something, right? - Q. - And I think what's tough is I'm like, okay, you got a long-distance, a long-distance high school relationship. - Good on them. - Damn. - Yeah. - Like long-distance relationships in general tough. - Very difficult. - When I was 19, I had to make the call of, I had like just started college. My girlfriend at the time was graduating college. She was moving back to another state, and I had to make the call of like, I can't do long-distance at 19. What when are we gonna be back together? So like choosing to do it is hard. - Absolutely. - Yeah, absolutely. Look, I didn't have a girlfriend throughout all my teen years. - Same. - Several of my 20s. - Yeah. - But I do think my advice to someone would be like, if you're moving from high school, or you're in high school or you're in college, and you have long-distance, unless there's like a concrete plan of like, we're gonna come, here's what our timeline, when we get back together, I do think it's like, you guys should break up. Like, it's okay. Like, it does come back to like, you're young. It's like, you're so brand new to relationships, and also like, you don't know where your life is going. It's important to give yourself that freedom. - Yeah. - I think it's like, to him in this situation, I'm like, this is really hard. And maybe it's a sign that like, I don't know, this is tough. But also he is right to be upset. - Yeah. - In general. - Oh, oh yeah, for sure. - Bringing it more to like, the accessible situation for anyone, regardless of age. You know, having jealousy of any kind, when you feel that you're really not supposed to, but you still feel that, that's a hard feeling. And it's scary to bring it up too, when you're like, well, there's no fix, it's not her fault, like all these things. But, you know, one of the most important things to learn in a relationship, and I hope that both people can learn it early is it has to be safe to have conflict. It has to be safe to bring something up. Even if it's frustrating, even if it leads to like an argument or misunderstanding, it has to be okay for you to do that. You can't be afraid of that. And so, you know, there could have been a world where he was included a lot more in this, where it's like, you know, this is Kyle, I'm taking him to the prom now, you know, he's a close friend of mine. But, you know, we're going to do this little thing where like, on his boot near, we have like a printout of your face. We're going to like, FaceTime you for the first dance and like, have it at eye level or something like that. Like, get me some goofy, like, this is surrogate, you know, OP for the night. - Sure, sure. Yeah, I think I was also, my mind went straight to the fact that like, I don't know, I guess I totally understand that prom is important for her and obviously something that she's excited for, so I don't fault her for still wanting to do that. But I have to also consider the fact that like, if my boyfriend was in a traumatic brain act, like, it had a traumatic brain injury, that I would want to go there. I don't know that I would be like, well, I want a party, so I'm going to do that. I feel as though, especially because like, the dynamic is that he's selling his gaming PC so as to come see her. - Oh, yeah. That's also a whole, I've got to talk about that. - It feels like she, I don't know, I feel like if my boyfriend was doing something like that, I would also want to be like, well, hold on, he was about to do this huge gesture for me, I need to go be by his side while he's going through this. So I don't think that it's intentional, but it unfortunately reads a little bit selfish to me. - Yeah. - I don't see that. - I am upset that he is in a hospital bed by himself when his girlfriend is with another guy. I love the idea of involving him more in some type of way because again, I think it's a completely okay decision to still go to prom. - Yeah. - But I just also feel as though she's putting more of her devotion to the event and to the party. And for him, it seems like it was just really important because it was important to her. - Yeah. - So maybe people's priorities are just a little mismatch. - That's true, 'cause, I mean, he's 19, so I guess he's not, he's already had a year more mature. - Yeah, he's a year more mature. - He's a grown man. - But yeah, it does seem like, and that's kind of the issue with like the, their age of long distance. Like, you're living your both separate lives. Like, you're not, like, I don't know. That's, I do agree with you. It is kind of like, if I was his friend, I'd be like, hey, maybe she's, like, this is her priorities. - Yeah. - Like, that's not necessarily wrong, but it's like, but it's important for you to go, like, maybe I should think about this, but I don't know. - Right. - It's tough. - I also think, like, you know, there's something about, like, assuming OP is only interested in women and his girlfriend is only interested in men, there's something about having a guy take your place where you're like, I was gonna wear suit like that. Like, that could have been me. You know, I don't know. It's a tough thing to feel specifically not like, my girlfriend's still going with some friends as opposed to that guy is taking my place. - Right. - She has to go with another date. Like, that, again, it's- - It is a date, yeah. - Yeah, and it's like, she clearly wanted this prom experience a certain way. She wanted a date seemingly a guy to, like, take her and do all of these, like, things, the dinner and the pre and the whatever and stuff like that. So for her, it wasn't, like, it has to be my boyfriend. It's really just like, well, as long as there's a guy there, I get my prom experience, and that's fine, 'cause that's what she wants. To speak to, like, the feelings and, like, the long distance of it all and being in high school, what I feel like I can offer there, too, is I know when you are that age, it feels so heavy and real, right? - Oh, so intense. - You're, like, 'cause even just with friends, you're, like, these are my, like, these are the buddies that I'm gonna have for life. - My life forever. - And, oh, my first girlfriend or boyfriend or whatever, like, oh. - I actually hit the jackpot right off the bat. - When came? - Yeah, it feels like the entire world. - I mean, like, I think when you're 19, you can't fathom past 30. So you're, like, this is my life forever. It's like, you have no idea how long life is. - Exactly. So I think that there's some validity, too, in, you know, doing what you can to make it work and, you know, being willing to sacrifice a lot of different things in order for your timeline to work out. So it's a little bit easier for us to comprehend from afar and be like, maybe, maybe don't do long distance. And it's like, no, actually go through that, learn how hard it is. So then in the future, you'll be able to discern, you know, how large your mile radius should be on hinge. - That's it. (laughing) - No, that's, I think, extremely valuable advice. Like, you're living your life, and maybe you have to go through this. - Yeah. - 'Cause I went through so many hurtful things with relationships. And it's like, I look back and I'm like, I think maybe I needed to. - Yeah. - You know, if I could go back in time and say, don't do this, it's like, would I become who I, like, would I end up where I'm at? It's like, maybe you have to deal with this. - I think so. - And his values are great, right? His commitment and stuff. It's like, no, those are valuable things. I'm not saying to not be that way. It's just, but it is also tough. Like, the context, you don't have that context of that age. So it's like, you don't want to also lose those values in the process. - Right, right. - And you're gonna be together and this is what he wants. The only advice I would really give is like, you have to be able to voice it. If a relationship is okay for you. And who knows? This could be, this could be your forever. You don't have the context. - Yeah. - Go for it, live your life, learn it. But like, you have to be able to bring it up. - Right. - Also, I would be remiss if I didn't, gaming PC. 'Cause you're in my world a little bit now too. First of all, that's not just an item. That's like your hobby. That is a connection with friends. If you're playing things online, there's a lot to that. And $900. - I feel really bad that his family, like, you know, his family has to know that he sold his gaming PC in order to get a ticket to go see his girlfriend. And then suffered a traumatic brain injury. - And his butt is still on the screen. - Playing, playing lacrosse. Like, he seems like such an upstanding person. I'm like, man, and he's like, I'm not getting that money back. I'm like, damn, I feel so bad for this guy. - But also, I can't fathom a build that he would have unless it's like multiple, multiple years old. That's worth, if it's a gaming PC, like a desktop, only $900 to sell. I feel like he got fleeced. - Well, and not even dimension the medical bills that he's now gonna have to deal with as well. - Yeah, hopefully. - Like, all of these, like. - It's a lot. This guy, this guy got hit. This is the beginning of one of those coming of age movies. - Yeah, he's gonna have an awesome later. - Like, truly. It could have been an 80s romance teen movie or like, let's have our own hospital program.
And then like, "Dada, da, da, da, did you and I?" Kind of like back on the music. His arch nemesis on Fortnite is like, "Where is he?" Yeah, yeah. He didn't show up to Dead Man's learnin' about it with the girl. And it's the guy she's on the date with. Oh! He bought the PC. Okay, comments. Someone said, "Well, contact the airline ASAP to see if you can get a refund given you're in the hospital. Sometimes they make exceptions for those cases." Someone said, "Dude, you just had a brain injury. You can't be stressed. You need to just let this one go and put yourself first. Heal rest up. There are endless amounts of girls in the world. Your health is the priority." Oh, he said, "Definitely just really bummed about this outcome. Just a total loss." Someone said, "That is really rough, brotato chip. Do not give this girl any more of your time or money." And OP responded, saying, "You're fuckin' loser." I'm kidding. I'm kidding. Sorry, that's the concussion talking, man. Oh, OP responded, saying, "Can't even play the new 007 now." No. Somebody. Can you like find this man? Can we send him a gaming PC, gaming PC brands? Please send this man a free PC. Update. Okay. Let's see if we get some good news for this guy. Please. Who do you rush in the morning? Unfortunately, I wasn't eligible for a refund from Air Canada since I missed the flight. Canada. Tag Air Canada. No, that's great. Because he's in the hospital in Canada. They'll give you money for that. That's true. That's right. So, that's good news that he lives in Canada. Yes. He placed your blood with maple syrup. I wasn't eligible for a refund from Air Canada since I missed the flight and didn't have travel insurance. It sucks, but there's not much I can do about it now. If I recover somewhat, I'm going to try to get a summer job if my doctors clear me for work. Hopefully I can save up enough money to buy a ROG ally so I can at least get back to gaming and ask-- A public of gaming at ASUS brand. Is it a good one? It can be. Okay. Well, at least I can get back to gaming and have some sense of familiarity from all of this. Still a pretty rough situation, but I'm trying to focus on recovering first and figuring everything else out later. I wish we had more context about their relationship, but, you know, it is what it is. My king. Really hard. The fact that he's not talking immediately about, like, you know, I'm going to go see her in the different time. Like, he's just talking about getting a job, healing up. Seems like he might be-- I wonder if more happened. Yeah. Maybe. I'd be curious. Yeah. It's tough. I think it's one of those things that he's like, it's a total loss. And I'm like, it's kind of though one of those things where you look back five years later and you go, "Oh, that was such a growing moment for me." For sure. In ways that you kind of can't comprehend in the moment, but like-- Yeah. He's got a bright future. Yeah. This will, internally, it can make him so much more. Yeah. I don't know. It's so interesting how that works. Oh, man. Yeah. Tough. Really tough. Really bad for the dude. Not bad. No. Okay, our next story comes from the subreddit board games. Oh. Games you play when you're bored. I honestly, when you said that, that was my first thought. Yeah, I knew. My girlfriend just broke up with me over a board game and I'm not even joking. Oh. I do wonder how often board games make people break up. Oh, some people are very confident in that. This could go either way. Yeah, this is not clear cut. Nope. We were playing Catan. I knew it. I was going to say Catan. Yeah. We were playing Catan last night with another couple. She had the longest road. I had an or port. She desperately needed. She offers me a deal. I decline because it helps her more than me. She got silent, scary silent. After our friends left, she goes, you know what your problem is? You care more about winning a fucking board game than making me happy. I laughed because I thought she was joking. She packed a bag and went to her sisters. She texted me this morning that she needs space to think about our relationship over Catan. Am I insane or is she massively overreacting? We've been together three years and she's ending it over a trade in Catan. Genuinely, don't know if this is actually about the board game or something deeper, but either way, what the fuck just happened. Right. I mean, it's got to be something. Right, right. It's got to be. I mean, maybe like, it's layered in that way of like, it's similar circumstances. Like what she said gives us so much. Yeah, yeah. You know, your focus is this rather than making me happy or over making me happy. It also wasn't a one-off of like, I didn't like the way you did that during that game. It was, do you know what your problem is? Yeah. That there's a lot under that. 100%. Yes. That's my inclination. It was the catalyst. It was the catalyst. It had to be. It had to be. Again, some people are incredibly competitive and they do get very fired up when it comes to stuff like that because we all know that feeling too when you're in a game and like sometimes, yeah, you're on top and you need somebody else to help you win in that way. Whether it's like by trade or like, you know, you don't want them to like steal your star or something in Mario Party or something like that. Yeah. And it's like a move like that. If you are really like invested in this game and you're, you know, following through on that plan and then somebody changes it like, sometimes it can get a little heated. Totally. To go so far as to end a three year relationship feels- That's a lot. Oh my gosh. And this was the next day, like the next day she was still mad. Right. Like it wasn't like just that night. It's like, okay, I cooled down. Yeah. The next day she texted saying she needs space to think about their relationship. That's bigger. And he says it's over Catan. She's not saying that. She's. Yeah. But there's a lot going on. This was just the final thing. Yeah. That triggered that same feeling. Yeah. So that context too. Because if he's just like, yeah, it's over a board game. Like there could be so many things he's missing. Yeah. Or not. Maybe it is over a board game. People do get heated. But for context for anyone who doesn't know Catan out there, the game is about like you got a choir resources and you get points at the end based on whether you have the longest road or the most cities. But there's a chance aspect of like rolling a dice to see where you can or rolling a die to see where you can put things down. So sometimes you need something because you just didn't get to settle anywhere near sheep. And someone has all the sheep. And the game is about trading and giving them an offer they can't refuse. And if they do refuse and you're stuck because you don't have sheep, that's the whole point to get. You don't get to win. Right. And that's how it goes. Yeah. And that's a great point in that because he's the one who's reporting this, he's writing it out. He is kind of also saying it just in context of the game. Whereas if she were to write it out, I'm sure she would be like, and this one time he did this, and the second time this, and then when we were playing Catan, this happened and it made me feel like all of this stuff. He's kind of I think just maybe blindsided as he isn't realizing the other time. He's self-aware and he's not even trying to like understand. It doesn't sound like he's trying to understand what else could be going on here. He's not like, okay, so he's, his reaction is like over a board game. That's going, going like, hey, let's talk. Like, what's, what do you feel? Like what's going on? Yeah, let's unpack this. Yeah, which, what's unpack this board game? That also makes me think though is in, in previous situations, like maybe it was also her responsibility though to bring that conflict up. And be like, hey, I have a problem beforehand, like maybe, again, we don't have this context, but it might not be that he's not self-aware. But he literally has never heard anything from her. And this is the first time that she's said, you know what your problem is. And he's like, whoa, well, the only time you're bringing this up is when we play this game. So it has to do with this game. Sure. I also think he would have, you know, if this is a world where, you know, he's trying to say things in his favor and leaving out a lot of things either knowingly or unknowingly, he would have probably said something in the effect of like, yeah, my girlfriend gets really competitive. She often does. Yeah, yeah. But again, if it is truly just this, for me, I love games. I love board games, card games, I play magic, things like that. There is, it is an awful feeling when you know that playing the game to the best of your ability. Being like, oh, I've got a great move. I got a great card to play is going to upset someone and there's therefore a cost to it. Yeah. It makes it hard. It makes it really difficult. Totally. Video games too. Like if someone's going to be like, fuck, like you did the, ah, you guys won this round. It's like, oh, okay. Yeah. I, you know, it's, to this day, I still laugh at it. But I was one time invited to a board game day with some friends, right? And I, most of the people I didn't know that well. But it was one of my friends. Two people I knew pretty well. And then like, my friend's roommate was there and like a bunch of other people were playing this big intense like Catan like game. But even more intense than Catan. Like it was, it was like a five to six hour game. Wow. And there came a part later on in the game where I had a move that I could make that I was like, this is kind of my only move. But by doing it, I was, I was going to eliminate someone. Now mind you, the point of board games is to. Play to win. Beeps are your best. Yes, yeah. Yeah, it's not like, oh, we all won. Scrabble this time. Like it's like you kind of have to do a move. So I was like, okay, I'm going to do this. And it was going to screw over my friend's roommate completely. And so I do it. Because I'm like, yeah, like, I'm like, ha ha, like whatever. Like, all right, like cool. And he luckily wasn't mad at me. He was for some reason mad at my roommate. Because my roommate was kind of like sort of helping me at the time. Like I was asking his advice, whatever. And I'm not kidding, he truly left the room. He left the apartment. He's like, no, it's fine, he's fine. He truly like, as he was leaving, like saying to my friend, he's like, we'll talk about this later. Like whatever. And like, left. Oh, shit. And I was like, oh my god. Sorry. I was like, oh.
And it was definitely like a this kind of happens. - Sure. - And I was like, that's embarrassing as fuck. And watching it happen, I was like, 'cause I am competitive. I've said it on board AF, when we play games, I'm competitive, but I leave it. You leave it on the field. You finish the game and you go. - Yes. - I love playing on you because it's good to be chill, but at the same time, if everybody's like, oh well, I don't care. I'm like, why are you playing this game? - That makes me more mad. - It's worse. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. And be like, I'm doing my best here. And then, oh, I didn't get to win. And you didn't get to, and that's okay. - Yeah, listen, I've also, I've been in that position too. We're like, I was on a family trip a couple of years ago and I was playing Mario Party with my brother and my cousins. And like, listen, I was way ahead, right? And my brother, like, he starts telling our cousins, he's like, guys, we have to team up against a Russia, like, out loud in the room. And so they all like, you know, steal the stars and whatever. And I was like, and why'd you do that? And like, actually, why'd you do that? And I like got upset. - Sure. - And, you know, and my, my sweet brother was like, no, you're right, I shouldn't have teamed up against you. And I was, and it literally, it lasted about two minutes. And then all of a sudden I was like, I can't believe I'm doing this. This is Mario Party. This is a video game, and I'm actually like pissed off at you guys. And we had a huge laugh about it because I had gotten so worked up, but then I all of a sudden was like, wait, nothing matters. It's a video game. - Yeah. - Like the competition aspect, it's so valid, but this idea of leaving it at the table or like, stepping outside of that for a second, zooming out and being like, wait, no one's winning anything. There's no money on the table. Like, I mean, I guess sometimes there is, and sometimes in the context of bets and stuff, it's a bigger stake at the end. - Sure. - But this just sounds like meaningless fun. - Yeah. - There's no reason to get so riled up. - I think I do get a little tilted when there is that vibe of like, team up against them. Like, I play a lot of Magic the Gathering and that's fine because when you play in a four person group, someone's gonna be the threat. Someone's gonna call it out and be like, they're the threat. And then everybody sort of goes in for a minute. But like, I don't know, there was a Smosh Games video a long time ago where we were playing Smash Bros. And if you didn't win, you had to drink a gross smoothie. And I love Smash Bros. It's one game that I think I'm not competitive level at, but I'm pretty good with the average person. And I was like, okay, great, I'm not gonna have to drink the thing. And like almost immediately, they were like, Damien's the threat and team up. And it was my first time like playing it on the channel too, like publicly. - Don't let him play. - Yeah, that's what it kind of feels like. - Yeah, I did. - Like, don't let him play. Everyone's gonna stop on a rosh, his character like, that part sucks, that could be something like, hey, I didn't appreciate that you did that in our group game night, like that kind of sucked. I didn't get to play as opposed to I didn't get to win. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's tricky, but now that we're even talking about it, I'm kind of like, yeah, that games can get a little tense. - Well, we also have the layer of like, oh, like we're trying to make a video together. - Right. - There is also what, where I get most frustrated when we're playing board games or video games is when I'm like, shit, like this moment is boring because the unepic thing didn't get to like, we're trying to make something exciting. So when I'm like, aw, because I lost, there's no, like there's no, what's the climax of this? - Sure. - That's true to you. - But we all wanted to get playing. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - But if I'm playing like outside of work, it's such a different, I play board games so differently. - So much more enjoyable. - I'm definitely more like locked in, but I'm like, I'm just having fun. - Yeah. - But once again, I'm like, once we put the board game away, I'm never mad at. - Totally. - So the comments on this, whatever the catalyst, it's usually because they were other issues that just kept growing until they bubbled over. The spark could have been anything. Someone said, "LMAO said so many men ever." A famous quote, it's never about the dishes. It was never about the game. It sounds like to her, you often chose yourself or what you wanted over doing things she wanted, ways she felt loved, or ways she wanted to be appreciated. It doesn't matter if it was intentional or not. It's how she interpreted the situations and how she felt she was treated. Lastly, someone says, "I think you mistakenly posted your relationships question in a board games forum." And for some reason got better advice than he would have in most relationship related forums. Yeah. - Sure. - Man, the last thing I'll say though is, I've played Catan a few times, and unfortunately the groups I played it with have been people who played plenty of Catan. And man, it makes me think of when I read about ancient history of like, "Oh, you were that nation that's just like, "Well, I guess we're just gonna, "we're fighting for the love of the game." - Yeah. - But boy, things are not looking good. - Totally. - You've seen the Mongol army over there? We're not, we'll just fight the good fight. - Yeah. - I guess like, I'm just like, "Fuck, I can't hear them "over the rumbling. "They are the rumbling." Like, "Oh, got it!" - Oh, shit. - No, like, truly, every time I play Catan, I lose in the initial where you put, where you're on the board. - It's about the resource. - I'm like, holy shit, it's like, okay. - Yeah, it relies so much on like other people working with you and when they do that thing of like, they're winning like, you know, team up against them, nobody trade with them. - And it's like, okay, well, you guys aren't giving me like a good chance and then again, like, real feelings start to come out. And it's like, all right, why am I crying to my cousin right now? - Yeah, it is interesting though. Like, thinking of like the teaming up against people. Like, what I think has happened in every game of Catan, I've played, is the person that everyone goes, "Oh, team up against that person." They never win, but it's because you should be thinking ahead of like, "Well, this other person's gonna win." I feel like that's, it's Peter Baylish, like chaos is a ladder. - Yeah. - But actually it's that little platform at the airport where it makes you walk a little bit faster, but not faster than the dude who's got really long legs next to you. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Yeah. - Yeah, no, like, they need to think about that. Like, that's like ancient history that I read about where they're like, guys, Alexander the Great, we're all teaming up to fight Persia. It's like, should we be worried about this guy? Like, right, right, keep your eyes open. - This guy's so pretty, yeah. Anyways. - I'll tell you this is fine. - Yeah, I know, it's all good. Damien and our roommate and I were playing Mario Party back then, we played on our N64 and boy, I don't know what was going on, my luck was horrible. And there was a moment where I finally got stars. In all the times we played, I just never even had one. And I finally had two. And then a chance time happened and I lost both. And what, actually, it was too funny, but what made me actually upset is Damien and our roommate both looked at me with genuine pity. (laughing) It was that competitive that they looked at me. They were like, "Hey, I'm real sorry, bud." And I was like, "Don't do that!" - No, literally, literally. - 'Cause you make fun of each other throughout. Like Shane would be like four spaces from a Bowser and he'd be rolling. I'd be like, "Hey Shane, don't roll for it!" - And he'd be like, "Roll for it" and I'd be like, "Oh!" - Yeah. - And then he loses all his stars and it's just like, "Hey, I'm real sorry." - I'm real sorry. - I'm real sorry. - I'm real sorry about that. (laughing) - And you're like, "No, don't apologize!" - Stop it! - Throw it in my face, that would be easier. - Maybe we'd die. We gotta move on. Next story. "Our next story comes from true off my chest. "Best friend doesn't know his proposal speech "is actually about me." - What's up? - Hi Reddit, I just really need to air this out somewhere because I have nowhere else I can go with this. I, a 30-year-old woman, my best friend, a 30-year-old man, and his longtime girlfriend, a 26-year-old woman, all teach in a school setting. I'm gonna be vague because I'm terrified of this getting back to either of them. I got my best friend Jim, the job, and he met Mia pretty soon after, and they've been happily dating for seven years. Now about me and Jim. We met in university and have always been super close. Jim is a bit of an air head, but genuinely so emotionally mature and kind, I never minded it, and I was always the one that had everything in order. I would book trips, he would happily tag along, that sort of thing. There are a lot of other things that are just part of our dynamic that I do without even thinking about it. One thing that I started doing right after the pandemic is making sure Jim had something to drink in the morning. He wasn't late to his classes necessarily, but he would always hurry in and not have any time to get settled, fill up his water bottle, et cetera, before his classes start. Meanwhile, I love being one of the first people in the building, so I have all the time in the world to fill his water bottle, power up the ancient work computer, and sometimes I get him a coffee or a tea if I think he may need it. Another thing I do is collect pictures and memes of Jim. The memes I usually make myself during school trips and things like that, I always analyze the pictures for a good reaction meme or a funny face he makes. These I exclusively use with him or Mia, who I am also a good friend and close colleague with. I also additionally smuggle information about him to his mother and Mia for presents, surprises, and those kinds of things. And I always guard the area when Mia and Jim want some alone time during school trips. Now Jim told me recently that he's going to propose to Mia and I was so excited. I went over to his house to proofread the speech he had prepared and my jaw dropped on the floor. I won't upload it here, it's in our native language anyway and also personal to him. But every single example he gave about what he loves about Mia is actually about me. In the speech, he talks about how he started falling for her when she started leaving him warm drinks in winter and filling up his water bottles in summer. How she made so many candid pictures and memes of him and gathered them in a big book for his 30th birthday. She did make the book, but all the pictures were supplied by me. He even mentioned some specific memes that he thinks they are proof that they have the exact same humor. He talks about how she always knows what he is thinking or what he wants and names specific examples of times where I vividly remember having a call with Mia to tell her what is going on in his mind. Now, I don't think he doesn't love me.
me. Nor do I think Mia took credit for any of this on purpose. But I found it so unsettling how the entire speech seemed to be more a description of my behavior and my acts of love towards him than to Mia. And of course, she would notice that too. I tried to get him to change major aspects of it, but didn't dare straight up telling him everything in the speech was me. He sent me the new version of the speech today, and I cannot stop reading it and thinking, "Oh, this situation was me. And this was me. Oh, and this was also me. This is not about credit. I don't want it. I don't need to stand on a soap box and yell that I love him better, because I simply don't think that way. Nor am I asking for advice. I just needed to scream it somewhere and will now hopefully never need to speak of it again. Thank you for reading." Oh, what a roller coaster. Let's start here. Who's named Jim anymore? Well, that's her fake name. The office owns that. Okay. So my initial reaction, he's like, "Hey, can you proofread this?" He's totally wanting her to read it. That's what he's doing. I don't know. He's seven years into it. This is maybe me just like romantic movies have rotted my brain to where I'm like, "Oh, no. He's seven years into a relationship, but before he commits to that, fully, he needs to confess his love." Holy shit. And he's trying to do it suddenly by being like, "Here's my proposal." And then it's like, he's actually proposing to her. But why? I know that's crazy. I'm just saying like that. Why? I'd be dating Mia when clearly there's this other person who's loving and caring for you. Why not shoot your shot earlier? It could be a situation of, I mean, going down that rabbit hole, it could be a situation of like, "Oh, well, we're just best friends, but me and I are like in relationship." Right. I could be with Mia and my best friend will be there too, and I can't be without her. I took this as initially when she's like, "I learned all these things about him and made all these memes." I was like, "Oh, girl, you're either in love with him or it's a very uncomfortable like you're kind of squeezing in on their situation." And when it was like, "Yeah, this proposal is about me." I was like, "Okay, sure, let's hear it." But if it's literally about the shit that she did, that Mia has never specifically taken credit for, like, that's wild. Let's say, for instance, though, taking this at face value, he made a mistake, and Mia's worried about like, hurting his feelings or coming across weird. She, or not me, OP, OP needs to tell him because assuming everything's above board and the people love who they say they love, he's about to make a crazy speech to someone who knows for a fact that they didn't do any of those things. So if we're all on each other's side and being truthful here, he's about to crash and burn with that proposal, that's what makes me think I'm like, is he really going to propose with this? Because like Mia's going to be like, "Oh, why not?" Well, I mean, I guess she kind of did, like, again, the book thing, like, it feels a little vague there, but then, like, the warming of the drinks, that definitely wasn't Mia. So it is a little confusing. I also got that initial idea, too, where, like, she read it and was like, "Oh, my God, wait, guys, this is about me, right?" He's about me, like, a beautiful eyes and beautiful hair. Right. She's describing a woman that he loves, it must be me. But she's talking about, like, no specific instances, like, I would say that she does have to kind of spell it out, but not in the way that's, like, do you love me? No, no. I think it's really. I'm not doing that. I'm going, hey, you're saying, like, you love how she fills up your water bottles, is that? Does she do that also? Are you still talking about Mia? Yeah, like, sort of from, like. This feels weird. And specifically, there's a photo book where she's like, "Oh, I loved how you made that photo book of all those memes." And he's like, "Well, she's like, but I did feel the, I supplied all the photos." Oh, I think you're right. Maybe, like, you said better example, but it just, that's why I'm like, this is a crazy proposal. He's not, he can't be this stupid. She called them their head, but like. Oh, true. But the thing is, like, if he's been with Mia for seven years and they all work at the same place, there's no way, there's no time where they spent the night together, drove in together the next morning, and then he finds a warm drink, like, no, like, in assuming that it's made by the person that he just spent the night and morning with, and got to work at the same time. Like, he'd have to be a, he'd have to really, you know, have to be the world's dumbest man. Yeah. The dumbest motherfucker in the world. No, I think you're right, Shayne, and I think if, if she were to approach it, even with a little bit of just, like, you know, wonder of, like, "Hey, I think I'm the one who did this." I feel like he would also maybe give it up right away and be like. Maybe make it more specific about her. Or, like, "Oh, yeah, you're right, like, I guess you did do that." Or something. Like, maybe more would be revealed if it just, like, follow-up conversation was initiated. If comments, someone said, "He knows what he's doing." Someone said, "You need to chill with your relationship with your friend. I understand you've always been close, but it sounds like you need to learn boundaries. They are building a life together back off." Comments like that are kind of accusing her of leading them on. He's in the relationship. He can also set his fucking boundaries. He's in a relationship and, like, it would be on both. Like, unless it's truly the most healthy, communicative, you know, two people are in a relationship and the third is the best friend that keeps guard when they need a loan time on a school trip. Yeah, wow. I know. That'd be so weird and uncomfortable. There is something there where, like, you know, I don't know, the way she described, like, I'd go through his photos to find reactions and all these things. I'm like, "Okay." That's true. Yeah. But I don't know if I would be like, "Hey, you need to back off." Not that. Right. Right. I guess it would just sort of be like, what is the understanding of everybody in the group? Because something like this has come up, it's clear that maybe stuff is a little blurry. How do people feel about each other? Objectively, Mia and Jim have been together for seven years. So it's like out of respect for that relationship, I think. I also believe that it's up to one of them to communicate if what OP is doing is not okay. I think she's just being a really solid friend and doing all the things. It is, of course, a little relationship-y, but if Jim and Mia aren't complaining and aren't saying, like, you're overstepping, it's like, great, then that just seems like a dynamic that everyone is on board for sure. For sure. It can be. It's entirely possible that that is a thing. My fear is that because we are hearing this from OP and this situation is so unusual in my mind, or in common rather. Unconventional. Unconventional. There's so much room for unreliable narrator stuff where I'm like, what's in general and it gets me in trouble a lot, I tend to lean on distrusting OP. You know? Because I'm just like, hey, you're the one telling the story, so I kind of put the onus on you. You're self-reported. I kind of have to assume there's gaps that you're, when you're saying you're, yeah, it's like not always fair. I'm wrong so many times, but a lot of times also, we get an update and it's like, oh, you're now giving us more information. You didn't give us before and it's filling things in, but with this one, I'm taking it also at face value of like, regardless of her behavior, his proposal is super inappropriate. I'm just like, not super inappropriate, but his proposal is weirding me out. He wrote about the wrong person, but yeah, what's going on? That is weird. What are you doing? If it's literally specifically about things that she did and everybody's being truthful, you have to tell him, oops, you got this wrong. Yeah. It's like, specific things about me. I'm just like, man, after 70, because when I proposed a Courtney, and just like, in any letter I write her, whatever, it's like, yeah, you have plenty of moments to pull from. You're distinctly remembered. >> Right, you're not confused. >> I'm not getting it confused me like, oh, right, sorry, that was, no, that was Ian that did that, yeah. >> Right, even if you are. >> I got that next stop. >> [LAUGH] >> I mean, she described him as emotionally mature and kind and stuff like that. So maybe he is sort of like using this as a move, like the comment said, he knows what he's doing. >> Yeah, which I really don't know. >> Which I fucking hate. That's cheating. >> Of him being like here, what do you think? >> Yeah, like that's emotional cheat, like that's, yeah, he proposed to someone else. >> I'm like, fuck that. >> Right, because, sorry, sorry, I was just going to say because if she isn't interested and she kind of is like, no, change it and whatever, and he gets the message. So he's going to use Mia as the backup then. >> Yeah, that's what it is, it's a last minute hand-made whole lot of people. There are a lot of stories of people before they get married, confessing their love for someone else. >> And then being like, no, there's nothing there. >> And then they go and they get married. I'm like, oh my God. >> No. >> More comments. Someone said, why is it that everything he lists, loving about her, are all things being done for him? He doesn't know what love is if he thinks it's just things that he gets out of it. Does he actually list anything about her personality or anything? Like he loves how happy she gets when insert thing or he loves the way she laughs or literally anything that doesn't have to do with her doing something for him? It's a fair criticism, that's all the context we have. But edit, I now understand I would be horrible if I don't straight up tell him the things I did versus what Mia did. I'm going to call him with new feedback on his speech soon and we'll just casually go through the things he needs to change because I was doing them and come with suggestions of all she does. >> Please tell me there's an update. >> There has to be. There has to be. Don't do this. >> There is an update. >> Yes. Pancakes. >> Okay, okay. Okay. What do we think is happening? >> I'm in gargoyle mode. >> So she's going to deliver the feedback and she's going to be like, hey, this is more about me than Mia. >> Yeah. >> It's a coin flip, either he's going to be like, oh, I didn't realize that. I got to do some thinking or it's like, I know. >> It's definitely going to be. >> I know. >> I know. >> It's got to be. >> Is that going to be my phone? >> I didn't think about that. And a fly goes in here and comes out here. >> Ew.
(laughing) - Okay. - Okay. - Update. I've been crying for hours. Soon after reacting to some comments, I called Jim to tell him he needs to rewrite his speech because the things he mentioned were things I did. Those of you who said he knew that were correct. He said he hoped laying it all out for me would make me realize I truly loved him all along. I guess the gay thing didn't really stick with him because I've been single for four years now. I hung up on him to call Mia before he could change the narrative on me, but Mia is a true trooper for saying she'll believe a sobbing woman over a man any day. We're going to meet up for lunch tomorrow, but I think we're both very done with Jim at this point. Thank you for the truth, bombs and criticism. I don't think I'll update again. - I knew it, Jims do not exist. (laughing) So if I'm reading that correctly, OP is gay. So that she's like, yeah, she's not assuming that at all for obvious reasons. Man. - Jim. - Jim. - Jim, you fucking fool. - Yeah. - I found the behavior. - Well now he lost both of these women. - Yeah. - That sucks. - It puts a lot of context to like, like Mia was not thinking anything of all, like we were talking about the behavior and everything. It's like, Mia's not thinking because she's like, yeah, she's gay, like I'm not worried about that, like. - Right, and Jim's like, I can change. - I can change. (laughing) - Maybe she just hasn't met the right idiot. - Yeah. - It's so great. - That'd be cool. - Yeah. - Man. - Oh, oh god, damn. Also shout out to Mia, like, there are too many stories that we hear where it's like, and now no one believes me in everything's met for me to be like, yup, I got the role. - Mia's like, woman in tears? Yes. - Yes, woman in STEM. - Yeah. (laughing) - I love this, I love this. - Oh, damn, dude. Hmm. - Damn. - Jim. - Jim. - Jim. - You got to move now, Jim. - Yeah, Jim. - You can't do it. - You got that job anymore, you know. - I mean, who's gonna warm his little drinks for him during this summer? - God, careful, because he's gonna die of thirst. - Oh, shit. - He might actually. - Yeah. - 'Cause he's an airhead and he's like, oh, I forgot water. - Oh, I've made it, I've made of it. Oops. Stupid, Jim. - You got to live with that forever. - Yeah. - Like, 'cause he's 30. It's like, okay, like when he's dating someone else, it's like, oh, so why'd your seven-year relationship not work? He's like, well. So. (laughing) - I was really in love with her best friend for seven years. - I just didn't say anything. - And she said she was gay, but. - Both. - What is that? - And she was dating women, but. - Right, but it was all an act. - It was like, 'cause she didn't want me to, she didn't want, you know, she started, yeah. - She was just trying to be polite. - Totally. - I guess we know just how emotionally mature this guy really is. - No, for sure. - Wow. - And that's very little. (laughing) - Very little mature. - Damn. - Okay, our final story comes from the subred relationships. It's supposed in 2018. - Whoa. - The old days. - Yeah. - There's a 28-year-old woman. She writes, "My boyfriend, who's 27 of three years, keeps doing the same comedy routine of trying to impersonate my cat." I know that's a really weird title, but it's kind of a really weird thing. So, last week, something startled the cat and she did this funny jump in surprise. My boyfriend then imitated it. It actually was funny the first couple of times and we were laughing. But ever since then, he's now started copying for lack of a better word. Everything the cat does. He curls up on the couch in the same position as her. He has also tried to perch himself on the back of the couch with his legs and hands tucked under him in that ball position, cats do, and it just looks ridiculous. He plays with the cat toys and scratching posts like she does. He sometimes runs on all fours of the stairs. If he sees she's sleeping, he'll lay down nearby and also pretend he's sleeping. He'll stay like that until she gets up or I nag him to stop because there's like actual adult things he needs to do. He imitates her meows and a couple nights ago, she started yowling downstairs while we were having sex. Right there in the moment, he made the same screeching sound while inside me. It completely ruined the mood for me. - Yeah. - He doesn't, he doesn't do all this like all day 100% of the time, but maybe half the time the cat does something, he'll do it too. If I tell him he's being annoying, he does stop but within a few hours to a day, he just does another cat thing. Like a week ago, I asked why he's constantly acting like a cat. It's weird and childish and he said, "Well, it's my comedy routine. I'm Catman." (laughing) Yeah, dot, dot, dot. I have told him it's really not funny anymore. It was old after the first 10 times but he keeps doing it. Now it came to tonight when I walked into the kitchen to see he put his plate on the floor and was eating off of it with his mouth while the cat was eating her dinner the same way. That was kind of it for me and I snapped at him. I said the cat impressions are seriously annoying, not funny and playing fucking weird at this point. Then he got mad at me for taking it too seriously. He said, "I don't get what the big deal is, who cares?" He stomped upstairs where he's been since then. Is there something I'm missing? Is this a typical sort of humor guys have and I just don't get it? If he'd done this from day one, I guess it wouldn't be as weird but he only started a few days ago. He has not listened to a single time. I've told him how annoying it's become. He even said, "But you thought it was funny." Just because I laughed the first time doesn't mean I wanted this. Am I totally wrong here? What the fuck is going on and how do I make him see I'm sick of his constant cat imitations? - Just to start off here, I do want to say that responding with the phrase, it's my comedy routine. I'm catman. - Catman. - Is objectively deeply funny. - Yeah, and probably the most valid thing he could have responded to. - Sure. - But I'm catman. - Well, right. - Sorry, I am catman. - You kind of art, that is a bit of a checkmate. - And you have to go, "You know what? You're right, you're catman." - I got it back up. - I gotta let you do this. - Listen, he's got that cat in him. - And then he throws up a hairball right in and there. - Yeah, yeah. - I mean. - Okay. - When they were having sex and he imitated a cat, she did have the opportunity to scream at the top of her loans. - Yeah. - To fully be like, "I'm a cat too." Here we go. - Yeah. - And then we're doing the cat thing. - Yeah. - 'Cause I don't know if you have seen that, that's it's crazy. - Cat play? - If you were ever unfortunate enough to hear cats having sex anywhere within a mile radius, it's the sounds of hell. - Right. - Yeah. - And you're saying they should have imitated that? - I was saying she had the opportunity to maybe end this whole thing by being like, "All right, I see your cat noise." - If you're cat on the cat, yeah. - And then go for it. - And then let it happen. - And then let it happen, new for him, which is awesome. - Yeah, and then he's scared. - Look, that sucks a lot. I do think one of the most important things before you live with a partner is know how they talk to animals. Like, I'm serious. Like that could be, that's gonna come up a lot. I don't know, it's another one of those situations where it just has to be safe to bring something up to somebody. Like, you know, "Hey, I actually, I'm so sorry, I don't even know why, but this noise specifically, it really bothers me." Like, you know, I know you're having fun. I'm so sorry, I feel like a jerk for even having to say it, but the noise bugs me, can we adjust? And that's all it should really take. But the fact that she's tried multiple times and he's like, "What do you mean?" And it's like, "Well, then it's funny for who?" 'Cause there's no other audience. - Right. - He put that plate down and was eating off of it without her in the room. That's what. - He's doing this, is he doing this for the cat? Like, does he think-- - Is it man cat? Yeah. - Oh shit. - I think the part that stuck out for me was when she said like, you know, that she has to nag him to go do real adult things. - Yeah. - Oh, there's bigger things going on. There's a lot. - I think this is grounds for me to be talking to somebody. - Yeah. - It feels like, 'cause I don't know that it feels so much of like, yeah, maybe in his head he's justifying it as a comedy routine, but I think, again, like you're saying, if you're doing it without anybody nearby, I think he's genuinely convincing himself that he is one with the cats. And he's behaving in all sorts of ways that isn't for an audience. - You know, I'll say this. I, my cat Freya, when I got her from the rescue or whatever, I won her over. I've told the story before, so I'll tell a fast version, but like, I would take naps like near the sofa while she was also napping. Like, I'd be on the ground doing it to sort of like, gain trust and show where it stays. - Sure in. - And so there's like, some behaviors you can do with an animal that is sort of like, I don't know, part of connecting with them, like curling up with them and taking a nap feels great. That's awesome. Even if it's on the floor in a sunbeam, like, yeah, lay down with your cat. But the idea of him, like, I'm gonna play with her toys, not necessarily with her, but like, I'm gonna play with it. Or, I guess they didn't establish the cat. Like, he's using the scratch posts. - Yes. - Wait, did they say that? - Yeah. - He's using the cat toys. - No, we're good. (all laughing) That's maybe a 51 or 50 or 50 story. - Yeah, I mean, there's also probably, I think, some, there's a chance that this is so tied to the idea of just wanting to make her laugh, the way that she did the first time. And he maybe is just remembering how good that felt. - But she has not laughed in a minute. Watch the SpongeBob ripped pants episode. It's an allegory for exactly this. - Yes, yes.
actually. And then it's like maybe in his brain or the way that his mind is working is he's like, I have to commit that much more to get that laugh again. And so he's like fully immersing himself in it. Yeah. He should go take a clowning workshop. Because we did that and boy, was that harsher than I thought it would be. Right. Where like you do a bit and it makes you laugh and the instructor goes, oh, the audience like that. Oh, where can I keep going? And you do it more and then people stop laughing. And the instructor literally looks you in the face and goes, they're not liking that. That's not going well. They're not finding that funny. Do something else. You got to do something. It was funny, but now we're over it. We got to do something different now. And it's like you're, it's, it is shocking to have someone say it so plainly to you. Yeah. This is actually just a story about how difficult comedy is. Yeah. So we understand you. It is really the worst, the worst thing about comedy is that the same thing does not work forever. Like you do a thing. You're like, oh my god, we hit. Fuck yeah, that hit. Yeah. And that's going to get old. So we got to find a new thing. It's the most brutal aspect of like, it's like, great. We found a funny, awesome thing. Like it's, I feel like whenever we have like a character or like a joke that works here at Smosh. And then you hit like a couple months in and you're like, now we have to find a new one. Yeah, totally, totally. I think the cat thing could still work too. I think he just needs. He needs to refine it a little bit. Yeah, he just needs to make it work. No, because genuinely I was, I was just at a show two nights ago. And this guy was talking about his show where he literally is a cat. And he like, he like shows different careers as a cat. This guy does need to find a production of cats. Yes. And get in it. Right. Like he just needs his specific POV. So, you know, we're at cringe right now because we haven't found it, but there's something there. Put them in the right context. It's no longer cringe. It's art. Absolutely. In the right litter box. Sure. If you will. But very far away from the OP. Got it. So some comments and the top comment, at least he hasn't started using the litter box. Or has he? I listen to perfect person the other day. And there was a caller that like, that's my book, Miles Monson, your name's podcast. If nobody, but you should know, he's awesome. He's guested here too. Yeah, there was an episode where like roommates were using the litter box. And I was like, Oh, that's, you have to send them to jail. I don't know what you do. That feels like a crime. Someone said, this is weird. Are you sure he doesn't have some kind of fetish? I mean, meowing back at the cat or whatever is fairly normal. But putting his plate on the ground to eat off of it with his mouth. There's something else going on here. I mean, you weren't even in the room when he started doing it. So it couldn't have been for his comedy routine. OP said, what kind of fetish would this be? You mean like a furry? If he's into that, there have been no signs whatsoever. I don't think that's a furry thing. No, no, that's, yeah. Lastly, someone said, you obviously need to bark like a dog and chase him up and down the stairs. That's hot. You have to stay and neuter your boyfriend. Sure. Sorry, Bob Barker told me I got to do it. I was watching the prices right. Got to cut off your balls now. I think you'd like it. Yeah. I just am like, you're meowing at your cat. It's so fun to talk to your cats like they're a person. Sure. Sure. But we got to get back to him doing it while they're, while they're having sex. That's a big one. That's a big one. That you don't recover. I don't think I was about to say you don't come back from that. That's over. That's it. There's only before and after. I think I'd literally rather be called a different name than hear a meow. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'll bring it back to, I'll bring it back to couples therapy that show that I love and like they're dealing with all sorts of crazy shit like cheating, horrible like things. But if they were talking and they're like, yeah, he meowed at our cat while we were having sex, I think she'd be like, that's the most fucked up thing I've ever heard my life. Me and him, girl. What the fuck? Yeah. Oh, get them boys. Get them. They're better be an update. There's no update. That's it. What? No. The cat man. What about? What else was cat man going to do? You know, grow older. What's cat men do? What does what cat men do? I'm more worried about OP. Me too. Hopefully she gets out. I mean, listen, it'll be an awesome thing for her comedy routine. Yes. When she discusses her ex-boyfriend. Totally. Yeah. That's her future. Yeah. Anyways, that's it for all of our stories. Wow. Whoa. Yeah. We did it. We did it. But thank you both for being here. Yeah. Thank you. Thank you, Shane. Yeah. This is a delight. Of course. I feel like you guys always have such great takes and advice. Oh, thank you. I'm very level-headed and a great duo. Thanks. Oh, that should be a show. Do you know them, your duos? How many duos do you know in the world do you know? Meow. Bring it back. Nice. Please cut that meow. The dog pooped meow girl. All right. Thank you for watching. We'll see you next week, next Saturday. Goodbye. Bye. Thanks again to DoorDash for sponsoring this episode of Reddit Stories.
Podcast Summary
Key Points:
Wise offers transparent, fee-free international money transfers with exchange rates matching those on Google, helping users avoid hidden fees.
The platform enables sending, spending, and receiving money in over 40 currencies with reliable, fair exchange rates.
A relationship story highlights a woman leaving a birthday dinner after her boyfriend’s mother made a dismissive and possessive comment about her seating.
The incident raises concerns about family dynamics and emotional boundaries, with the mother’s actions seen as disrespectful and controlling.
The man in the story fails to support his partner, leading to a broken relationship, highlighting the importance of emotional accountability in relationships.
A younger couple’s story shows jealousy and emotional pain when the boyfriend is hospitalized and the girlfriend attends prom with another date.
A board game dispute ends a three-year relationship, suggesting that while the incident was minor, deeper emotional issues were at play.
A friendship-turned-love story reveals a man’s proposal speech mistakenly describes the woman’s actions as if they were his own, exposing a deep emotional misalignment.
Summary:
The transcript explores a series of personal relationship stories, each highlighting different emotional challenges. One features a woman leaving a birthday dinner due to her boyfriend’s mother’s possessive and disrespectful behavior, which leads to a rift in their relationship. The man fails to support her, showing poor emotional accountability.
Another story involves a young man in a hospital suffering a traumatic brain injury, devastated when his girlfriend attends prom with another man, despite his deep commitment. His emotional pain underscores the difficulty of long-distance relationships and the need for mutual support. A third story centers on a board game dispute where a woman ends a three-year relationship after a minor trade in Catan, revealing that while the event was the catalyst, deeper unaddressed emotional issues were at fault.
Finally, a story about a best friend’s proposal speech reveals that every detail about the partner’s actions actually describes the narrator, exposing a profound emotional misalignment. These stories collectively emphasize the importance of emotional awareness, communication, and mutual respect in relationships—especially when cultural, familial, or situational dynamics create conflict. Wise is introduced as a financial tool that supports global living through transparent, fair currency exchange, contrasting with the emotional struggles shared in the personal narratives.
FAQs
Wise offers transparent exchange rates similar to what you'd see on Google, helping you save on hidden fees. It supports sending, spending, and receiving money in over 40 currencies, making it ideal for global living.
Yes, some family members, especially mothers, may display jealousy over a partner's relationship, which can lead to uncomfortable or even hurtful behavior, such as taking control of seating at events.
Yes, especially if the event is significant like a prom, and the person feels their relationship or presence was overlooked, even if the partner didn't break their commitment.
They should have an open conversation with their partner about the behavior, and if necessary, consider ending the relationship if the family dynamic is toxic and not improving.
Yes, if the family's behavior is consistently disrespectful or toxic, and the partner does not show willingness to address or change it, it may be necessary to reevaluate the relationship.
While board games can cause tension, a breakup over a game like Catan is rare and usually a symptom of deeper issues such as communication or emotional needs not being met.
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