Session 98: Kaia Gerber

Coca-Cola. For the big. For the small. The short and the tall. Peacemakers. Risk-takers. For the optimists. Pessimists. For long-distance love. For introverts and extroverts. The thinkers and the doers. For old friends and new. Coca-Cola. For everyone. Pick up some Coca-Cola at a store near you. Hi, pussies! Tonight on Therapist, we have on one of my best friends, Kaya Gerber. She is one of the nicest, greatest, smartest, funniest people I've ever met. I just adore her. We've gotten so close over the years. Over this past year. And I am so grateful. And like, randomly, we have so many. We've traveled a bunch together. Last weekend, we were in Austin. We went to Portland together. So we just have like a bunch of memories in such a short amount of time. And I'm just very grateful for her. I think she is so talented. She is one of the smartest people I've ever met. She runs a book club called Library Science. You have to check it out. It's incredible. It's inspired me to read. I'm almost there. I haven't started reading yet, but I'm almost there. She is the star of the new Givenchy campaign, and she was recently cast in Ryan Murphy's The Shards. She was in Overcompensating Season 1. You may recognize her from Bottom, Saturday Night. She is everywhere. She is so incredible. So talented. You can also catch her in Season 2 of Palm Royale on Apple TV, coming out soon, which is also incredible. She stars alongside Kristen Wiig, who, you know, I'm just. Is. Is. An idol of mine. She's one of the coolest people I've ever met, and she's humble and smart and caring, and most of all, she's an incredible friend. I feel like this has just been like two minutes of me complimenting her, but she deserves it. To submit Tell Me What's Wrongs, go to PassThatPuss.com and click Tell Me What's Wrong. Leave a name and number if you're feeling fancy. Okay. Enjoy the episode. Love you, pussies. Hi, pussies. Welcome back to Therapist. Tonight we have on actress, supermodel. Whoa. Wait. Sorry. Keep going. What else? Go, go. Leader of her own book club. Okay. Kai Gerber. Hi. Did I miss anything? No. That's too much. Actually, you did too much. And great friend. Great friend. Great friend. Which, by the way. Okay, so for those that don't know, we actually filmed this episode. Almost a year ago. Almost a year ago. And the episode got lost. And it's the only time it's happened. It's the only time it's ever happened. The episode got lost. But now it was almost like a blessing because we actually became really close friends in between then and now. Yeah. So now this makes more sense. I was. I could tell you were stressed when you texted me that the episode was lost. And I truly celebrated. You were happy. I was thrilled. I could not have been happier. It was. I blacked out. I had slept the night before, like an hour. And I was shaking. And I had met you once before. Once. And I left. One time. I was like, that's so bad. That's going to be bad. Well, now this makes more sense because we actually have so many experiences to talk about. We've lived so much life together now. We have because, as I say, you are my most adventurous friend. It's. You say this to me all the time and it's upsetting because I'm sorry. You got me out of the house on a Wednesday. That's true. I do that. I also, like, whenever I come to your house, I appreciate more so when you come meet me on the east side because it's not close. I prefer. The east side, I think. I know, but you live. I mean, it's nice over here. I understand. It's quiet. It's quiet. I was born close by. You were. Yes. It's nice. It's just, you know, but, like, I love a long Uber ride because I obviously don't drive. And I, like. I actually, by the way, I think you're onto something. I think I'm done driving. Really? I'm done. I've done it enough. You know what? What? I get it. I'm over it. I get it and I don't even drive. I don't. I'm over it. I've driven so much. I'm a bad driver. You're not a bad driver. Jake, have I driven you? No. How do you know? Wait, yes, you have. Have I? No. No, you haven't. No. No. Yes. No. I'm trying to think every time it's not you driving. No, no, no. That's because I'm bad at it and if there's someone else that can drive, I have them do it. Right, okay. So, yeah, I wouldn't drive either. I think I'm going to be done. I get it. I've retired. I'm done. Okay. I did drive here. Okay. I can drive you tonight. And we're driving to dinner. It is so funny that, like, we know each other so well and the second we start doing this, I feel like I've never met you before. I know. I feel the same way. We know each other. We know each other. Really well. So, we've traveled. We just took a trip together. We were in Portland together. We were in Portland together and we had the best time. It was so fun. I mean, well, you took me to nature. For the first time. I've never done that before, you guys. Kaya was like, Will was there too. And they were like, okay, like, let's go to a watering hole. What was it? Yeah, a swimming hole. A swimming hole in Portland. We wanted you to get in the hole. I got in once. And you got in the hole. And then I was like, I'm done. It was so wonderful to see you in nature. I have such great videos of you trying to walk down a steep hill. But that wasn't even really nature. That was nature in the middle of a city. Well, it's because I kept being like, okay, I'm in nature. I'm in nature. Yeah. And then I would look out and there was a Holiday Inn Express and we were under a highway. We were like two minutes from a McDonald's. So, I was like, I'm in nature. I'm in nature. So, I was like, okay, this isn't the nature that I was sold. Right. But, like, if anything, it's better. We sold you the dream and we under-delivered and I'm sorry. No, you guys were jumping off cliffs. I did jump off a cliff. Did you injure yourself? No, Kyle did. Yeah, I was about to say, Kyle hurt himself, right? Because when you see a cliff, you're like, I got to try that, right? And it doesn't look as high as it feels. And you do it once and it's amazing. And then to want to do it again, to return to it is crazy. Like, he jumped multiple times, which I was like, that's a mistake. You do it once, you're safe, you're grateful, you had the experience, and then you swim to shore. But they were jumping it multiple times and that's, I think, why the injury happened. Where did he get injured? His shoulder. I have great videos of you guys jumping on my little camcorder. Really? Yeah, I need to. Oh, yeah, you were vlogging. I was vlogging. I totally forgot about that and I need to get them on my phone. Jake was, like, fully clothed, video camera out. Like, flip, it flipped out. And you were just sitting up on a rock at, like, the highest peak, sort of in a huddle, trying not to be on your phone, which I really appreciated. And then after five minutes, Jake looks at me and is like, okay, what am I supposed to do now? I didn't get it. And then, like, also, like, we were sitting there and then I couldn't, I hadn't, like, I didn't want to ruin anyone's vibe. So I didn't want to say, like, hey, when are we going? You said, when are we going? Starting 20 minutes in. Right. So 20 minutes in, I eventually started saying. And when, what's the vibe? Like, we should go. And no one agreed with me because everyone was enjoying themselves in nature. And we saw, and we saw weapons, which was my type of day. We, that was actually, was that the same day as the swimming hole? No, I, you know, I can't do both. That was too much. That was too many activities. We did, we did weapons and then swimming. We did weapons and then swimming hole. We did weapons on Saturday, swimming pool on Sunday. That was really, really, really a great weekend. It was the best weekend ever. It was the most wholesome. It was so fun. And then we got dinner Monday night. Yeah. And then you left. And then we left. That was depressing for me. You are such a star. Can I just say? You are. You are. No, because. No, you are. No, I'm just going to do it once and then I'm not going to do it again. No, I mean, you can do it more times. I know, and you're going to love it. You, I got to see you on set. And my favorite part about seeing you on set was that everyone was coming up to me. Like, I didn't already know how incredible you are. And, like, delivering the news to me that you're a superstar and are going to have this huge, massive career. And that they never want to make a movie without you. And I was like, you're telling me who is his self-proclaimed best friend, which you can say that I'm not, but I. No, you are. We had a discussion. We had a discussion about it. I said, like, hey, is it okay if I refer to you as my best friend? And you said, I've been doing that already. Yeah, so it works. But you, they just were obsessed with you and kept adding you to things. And it was your first movie. It was my first movie. It was amazing. And it was so fun. And you're so funny. It was so. It was like the most. Do you want to know how I knew I was having a good time? How? That room we were in for the scenes that I was shooting on Monday was so hot. I got locked in that room. Do you remember how hot that room was? Did you hear me complain once? No. Not once. Yeah, and you hate being hot. I hate being hot. Don't you sleep with your. Yep, I sleep. I got it just got a fan delivered. With your mattress at, like, minus 10. Yep. Yes. I have the same mattress as you. You have an eight sleep? Of course. Oh, I'll sleep over. You will? Yes. Because you can turn yours down on your side of the bed. Wait. I. Didn't know you had an eight sleep. Of course I do. I'll sleep over. And I have a Lola now, too. Okay. We are Lola girls. We are Lola girls. I was sleeping with one unknowingly. Oh. I had one, but I didn't know what it was. And I was just like, this is so soft. And then you started talking to me about the Lola. And then I ordered one, and it came, and it was the exact same. Because Charlie and I were like, it's a lifestyle. But the XL changes everything. The XL. It's heavy. You know what's low-key kind of weight? It's a weighted blanket. It's like a Lola app. It's weighted. It's good for my anxiety. I also don't use a comforter anymore. Wait. I don't either. I literally use this. I only use my Lola. It's the best. Sometimes it's. Because it slides off in the middle of the night. Oh, always. But that just shows you how soft it is. It's part of the fun because then I like wake up and I'm like. Right. And then you pull it back on and then you get to wake up and be like, oh my God, it's 3 a.m. I have a few hours left. Yeah. I also know that you hate being hot and that room was so warm. Not one complaint. And the worst lighting ever. And you didn't complain once. And then you left and I was like, I'm just going to use Jake's room because you had the nicest room of anyone. It was a really nice room. You had the nicest room. And then I got locked in there because they started shooting towards the door and I couldn't leave. So I did a bunch of research on Puxatawney Phil. Oh. Do you know about Puxatawney Phil? The groundhog. Yeah. Do you know I used to do Puss Hog Day? Wait, what is Puss Hog Day? I would wake up and decide if it was spring or not. That was it. That was it. I'll show you videos of it. It was electric. Wait, I saw you doing the like 0.99% of germs. Did you like that one? Oh my God. That one came to me in a vision. It was so funny. Yeah. Thank you. It was so funny. I just sit and watch because people are really inventive. They are really inventive. And then you really take it to the next level. It's really funny. The Mary Magdalene one too. The Mary Magdalene ones were my favorite series I've ever done. That was great. And then also Noah's Ark. The Partiful. The Partiful. The Partiful for Noah's Ark. It was so funny. It was incredible. Oh, and you want to know my favorite part of that whole shoot? What? Was you remember when I shot the scene, it was Louis and Maya in the car. Yeah. And I. I ran away and then they called me back and they, because we were improv-ing, but I didn't know we were improv-ing. Yeah. That was confusing because you were, you were running out of that shot. Right. And I don't know where you were going, but somewhere far on a busy street. It was down a hill. And then I just hear like, come back, come back. And you came back so confused. Because Graham was like, they're calling you. They're calling you. And I was like, I don't have my phone. And then I, I walked back in and I think like, and I, and I was like, what? And then he was like, no, you're in the scene. And I was like, oh. And I'm ready now. And it was great. You put your glasses back on and you said, I'm locked in. It was so funny. But I think you have one of the hardest jobs on that movie, which is coming in once it's already been established and everyone knows each other. Right. It's scary. And getting thrown into an environment that you haven't been acclimated to yet. It's scary. And you did such a good job. Thank you. They literally couldn't get enough. They kept adding stuff. I know. And remember, I tried to stay. I was like, I can stay for the week. I wanted you to stay so bad. I wanted to stay so bad. Once you left, I just was really sad. It's crazy that that all came from my crash out over a boy. It was that crash out that got you that job. He got me a role in a movie. So like, we're not going to thank him because he doesn't deserve to be thanked. Because it was really you that got yourself the role in the movie. We were like, I was letting it rip for like 60 minutes. Yeah. And Graham was just sitting there like. And then I started a movie. And then you got a role in a movie. And then I got a role in a movie. Speaking of roles and things, you are in the Shards. I am. Have you read it? No. And it's in my room next to my bed. No, it's fine. No, it's in my room next to my bed and I'm going to read it. Zero preparation for the interview is crazy. No, I'm really excited. You know reading's hard for me. You can listen to it. No, I'm going to read. Okay. And I'm really excited. Reading's not hard for you. Yes, it is. Why is it hard for you? Because I have the attention span of a goldfish. Yeah. It's crazy to me how much you read. It is one of the most underrated things about you. I have no idea how much you read. Yeah, I do read. Do you like read in your sleep? Because sometimes you'll tell me like, oh, I read this book, I read this book. And I'm like, when? Because I've hung out with you all week and there was no reading involved. But somehow you're finding the time to read these books. I mean, it's hard to read around a lot of people. Well, of course. That's what I'm saying. But you find the time. Yeah, I'll read it before bed or in the morning or on planes. Okay. I just took your breath away. In the morning. It's just like, I can't imagine. I can't imagine waking up and reading. Oh, that's actually great. That's the best time. Tell me why. Because usually you're like grabbing your phone. Yeah. And then your day is just already intruded upon by all these people. Yeah. And when you read, no one can reach you. Wow. And I actually think reading is a muscle. And the more you do it, the better your attention span gets. Okay. Because it's hard. If I take a week off, I go back to read and I have like 20 minutes before I'm like, okay, I need to do something else. Okay. Yeah. So now you saying that, that it's a muscle has made me believe that I can do it. You can 100% do it. Anyone can do it. You got it. Well, maybe not. Anyone can do it. No. Oh. Lea Michele can do it. She can read. That was the best when you got her to read. Dude. It's crazy because manifestation's real. Aren't you the biggest Glee fan? Yes. By the way, speaking of Ryan Murphy. Glee. Glee. Have you ever spoken to him about Glee? No. And I need to. You need to. Because that show raised me in a huge way. Well, I, before we did. I did that interview. In my head, I had this moment where I was like, I'm not going to ask her about the reading. I'm just not. I'm not that type of person. Like, I'm not going to ask her. You want to do so bad. In my manifestation dreams, I hope that she picks up the tell me what's wrong and starts reading. I swear to God. And she did it. And in that moment, the room, you could hear a pin drop. It was so powerful. It was so powerful. It was so powerful. It was my shining moment. It was amazing. Next question. Wait, but so are you, when do you, when do you start? How are you, how are you prepping for the shards? How do you prep for a role? Um, it's different for everything. I just got the first two episodes. So before that, it was just reading the book. Like that was the nice thing about it being based on other material is like there's, you have access to, you know, I don't know how much they're going to stay true to it and how much they're going to change, but like you have access to at least some kind of starting point. Um, yeah. But I don't know. I'm playing like an LA kid. So it's not that I don't know how different it will be from myself, but it's in the eighties, right? It's in the eighties, which I wasn't alive for. See some research. Yeah. You know, I think it's going to be fun. And honestly, I love Ryan Murphy. Like I didn't realize Glee was camp when I watched it cause I was probably too young to understand camp, but he does that so well. He, yeah. He's like the master of camp and television camp, like intellectual camp, like scream Queens. Oh my, that's a genius show. I've never seen Nip Tuck though. And I really want to see it. Neither have I. And I would like to see it. Are you a TV person? I am. I used to be more than now, but I'm like a very, you watch everything you read watching scandal. I watch for the third time. You've seen it in its entirety. I've seen it. I've seen it. Okay. So I watched it when I was a kid up to season four. Then I stopped. Then I rewatched it during COVID in its entirety. And before COVID, I had rewatched season one and two. So this must be like the third time. I've rewatched it all. I see. But I don't understand how you have time. Like if you have time to watch this many TV shows, you would read more books than I know. I know. But something about, have you ever seen scandal phone while you're sometimes. Okay. That's it. I understand the rewatch when you want to have phone time and also have noise. Have you ever seen scandal? No. Okay. I think you're going to say it's the best show in the world. No, it's not. It's not. Okay. There's just like, I've never felt those emotions about a show before like that. I do about scandal. What do you mean? Like strong emotions there? Like the tension between Kerry Washington and Tony Goldwyn. Is he the president? Yes. It is like something I've never witnessed in television before. You know which president I love in TV? James Marston. Oh, in paradise. Oh. We will. That is a show we bonded. My president. I loved him in that show. I was actually talking about that show today with my brother. I feel like you're the only other person that I know that watched it. No, that show, that show changed my life. It was so good. And it was such a random. Like that's so not the kind of show I would watch, but I found it. And when there's that drone shot at the end that then, I don't want to give any spoilers away, but that the ending of the first episode, I was like. And the needle drop of what was it? Like another day in paradise or something. So sick. Great music in that show too. Season two of that show is going to be so different than season one now and I'm so excited. Also Julianne Nicholson. I was talking about her today. She's so good. She's so good. And in Hacks too. She's in Hacks and she's really good in Blonde. What's Blonde? The Marilyn Monroe movie. I've never seen it. Andrew Dominic. Have you seen any Andrew Dominic movie? He did these, this two part film series for Nick Cave and it's so wonderful. Have you seen it, Nolan? All I know is Killing Them Softly. Okay. Also great. Yeah. He, there are these like beautiful set of films that he did for Nick Cave that I love. Who's Nick Cave? I love you. Who is Nick Cave? I thought you were talking about. Sometimes I'm like, we're so similar and then sometimes our tastes just could not be more opposite. It's like, I'm watching Scandal. You're reading books. Right. I'm rewatching The Office. Still. Yeah. Have you seen it? No, I've never seen The Office. You are a comedian. I know. Oh, thank you. You are. Thank you. I've never seen The Office. What do you call yourself? A comedian? A person. I would like. You're not a personality. I mean, you have a personality. I don't. I would like to say comedian. Like comedian is what I aspire to say, but I'm scared that someone will be like, no, he's not. So I just don't say it. No, you're a comedian. Thank you. I don't care what anyone says. That's insane. Well, Kaya said it. So you're a comedian. What camera do I look? That's a comedian. You heard it from her. You are. And you're not going to disagree with her. So you should watch, though, one more time with feeling. And I think the other one, as I know, this much is true. OK, it's they're really sad, but they're beautiful and really cool films. But then Andrew, how did I get on this? Andrew Dominic directed Blonde, which Julianne Nicholson is in. And she's really wonderful. She plays Norma Jean's mom. Norma Jean is Marilyn Monroe. Right. Yes Okay Next question Next question This is going well. Sometimes I just feel like I don't know anything, but I know everything. You know everything that you need to know. You know what I learned about you while we were in Portland? What? People work out on the weekends, you guys. People work out on the weekends. Yeah. We worked out together. You work out. I mean, you actually- Never on the weekends. No, no, no. You lasted five minutes. I lasted five minutes, and then I said- But your headphones died. My headphones- Well, the first time I did 12, 330. Which, by the way, I've never successfully gotten through a 12, 330. It's hard. I do 12, 320. Okay. It's hard. I can't do 30. 30's hard. But then day two, headphones gone. It was a Sunday. I was like, this isn't happening. It was overly ambitious to try to work out on the weekend, but I was glad that we did it. Me too. It was fun, and I liked seeing you in the gym. You actually look so good. Really? Yeah. And I've seen you in every state and with as little clothing as possible, and you look amazing. You have, haven't you? Yeah, I've seen you basically naked. Basically, yeah. And you look very good. I feel like I've really been working out. Look at that weight. Just show it. Don't, yeah. Look at that. Like. Is that Louie? Yeah, that's Louie. You look so good. I did 55s today. I've never lifted anything that heavy. It was hard. Sometimes a child will ask me to pick them up. You're like, I can't. And I'm like, no, I can't. Right. I can't do that. You are like, you know what's crazy? Back to you being my most adventurous friend. It's insane that you think that, but yeah. Do you remember the 4th of July too? I was also in nature. Yeah, we scaled a mountain together. You realize I don't do that. Like, I don't know. I don't know how to like emphasize that enough. When you say that I'm your most adventurous friend, do you mean like I'm cool party adventurous or I'm like nature adventurous? They're all the same to me. So across the board. Across the board. I'm your most adventurous friend. Like it's Tuesday night and you're like, come meet us at blank. And I'm like, it's Tuesday. I'm like, okay, I'm leaving the house, I guess. Yeah, but you do it. You come. I know. I know. You show up. I show up. And you're like the most entertaining person ever. It's so fun to watch people meet you for the first time. You know what? I was thinking. I was thinking about this on the drive here. I have never heard someone say something bad about you ever. Oh my God. Never. People have. No. People. Well, not to me. Maybe they know that I would kill them if they did. Thank you. Probably because I have this look where it's like, don't even think. Well, I love all your friends and I love making Louis laugh. He is very generous with his laughter, but you do have to earn it. But once it comes, it's so gratifying. That's why I put on the show because like when we're out at dinner and he starts laughing, I'm like. I'm like, okay, I'm going to keep it going. I'm going to keep it going. He always says to me and we're like, how are you and Will single? But then I think about the people in the world that are available or that at least I know that are available and they're not worthy. Dating in LA is really hard for me. Just as a gay guy. It's really hard for me. Yeah. I mean, what do you think you are looking for? Do you want more of a like, like, do you want a monogamous relationship? Do you want like a more traditional relationship? I think just to start, look, I'm so open to anything eventually. But I think for my first boyfriend, I'd like it to be monogamous. Well, also, I think in order to be open, you have to have trust and to have trust, you have to get to know each other and know that you can be monogamous. My thing is just like, I don't know. I feel like I'm so selfish and so busy that it's like hard for me to like give someone else my attention. Right. But I do think totally. But I think that's a really actually great quality to have because I used to be the opposite way where like I would completely just. Just change my personality and my values for someone. A hundred percent. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I always dated people that were older than me. And so I was very willing to give up everything. Like I was like, I can show you I love you by completely giving up my life for you, which is actually not how you build respect and trust and is not good in the long run. Because then you start to like bring a little bit more of who you really are into the relationship. And they're like, no, I liked that person before. But that wasn't your fault. It's like my fault. But yeah. Well. It's also their fault. They're not. They're not. They're not all, you know, innocent. But yeah, I think that that's a big thing. And I also like I was already talking about this the other day with Lou, where we were like, the amazing thing about you is the person that ends up loving you is going to be so obsessed with you because you are such a specific person that they're just going to like die for you and die for every single part of you. I believe this so much. And if they don't, then like, like, don't you dare shave your legs? Oh, my God. I want to shave my legs so badly. I texted Kaya the other day and I was like, how do I like. How do I remember? How do I remove the hair? How do I remove the hair from my body? Don't you dare. I saw this TikTok and it was like, you need to shave your legs. And I was like, damn. OK. I shaved like a patch. I told you. What did you did you shave it with a razor? No, I just did like a little. Did you do a near test? I did a little like a like I did this razor and it's so bumpy now. Don't do it. I mean, obviously do whatever makes you happy, but don't do it because maybe I'll trim it. OK, this is I truly believe. This they are lucky to even be in the position where you would have sex with them. So they can't then start putting like parameters up of like or, you know, non-negotiables. That's insane. I know it was. They should be so lucky. It was crazy, but I should be like licking your leg hair. Oh, thank you. And swallowing it. OK, that's what I think. I want to wax it so bad just to see what it's like. But I think you're going to feel really naked. Do guys do actors like wax themselves for TVs and movies, though? Yes. Right. You're asking me. I'm asking you because I've dated a lot of actors. No, I'm asking you because you're an actress. Well, it's different. I'm sure for I think it depends what the role requires. I wouldn't shave my legs for a role. I mean, I shave my legs for myself sometimes if I'm feeling like it. You know what I love is an everything shower. Do you know what that is? I do, but I never do it because. Well, actually. What? I've started skin care recently. What do you mean? Like on the. I've never washed my face before. You have perfect skin. It's always the people. It's always the people that don't wash their faces that have good skin. So I never wash my face, but I started using Rode. Okay. I really fuck with it. I saw you post a picture wearing Rode and your skin was glowing. Glowing. Look at it right now. Are you wearing it right now? The glazing milk. Okay. And I use the face wash, the glazing milk, and then I do the spray. The pineapple face wash? Yes. I use that too. It takes your makeup off really well. It's really. I pointed at you and said your makeup. No, but. No, you know what? I would use it, though. No, I use. Topple, row, and drag. Yes. No, well. Nothing took that makeup off. I had a black eyeliner under my eye and I was like, yeah, this is what you guys are getting and I'm really sorry about it. Sometimes your life is so funny. It's so insane. It's so. Yeah. Like, well, you saw what I texted you today. About. Oh, about. Mm-hmm. Somebody texted me. Oh, my God. Oh, yeah. Somebody texted me. I will not name this person, but like they texted me, happy birthday. And I said, oh, my God, blank. I miss you, but it's not my birthday. And they said, oh, so when's your birthday? And I said, October 27th. Why? And they said, because usually the people that say they miss me, I would know their birthday. Who is this? And I said, um, this is Jake. And they said, oh, shit. Wrong number. You're not Kiki Palmer. And I said, what? It's so funny. It was actually, that's a real conversation I had today. But that's like normal for you. And I was like, damn, it was one of the funnier things that I'd. Happened to me in the past week. I got a really lovely happy birthday text a month ago. And it was not my birthday, but it was so nice. And it said, happy birthday, Kaya. They didn't think I was Kiki Palmer. Oh, they didn't think you were Kiki Palmer. They said, happy birthday, Kaya. And like all these amazing, lovely things. And I literally just said, thank you so much. Oh, you didn't tell them? No. Maybe I shouldn't have told them. Well, no, because then maybe like that person actually now can reach out to Kiki Palmer because maybe it is her birthday. Is it Kiki Palmer's birthday? I think she's a Virgo. It is Kiki Palmer's birthday. Happy birthday, Kiki. Happy birthday, Kiki Palmer. Wow. Yeah, no, that was crazy. That is so funny. But also like Kiki Palmer deserves more than just a happy birthday. No, no exclamation point. There was nothing. It was just happy birthday. You know, when you say congrats or congratulations, it automatically sends confetti. Yeah, I love it. And also, how do you turn the thing off of Zoom where it sells? It celebrates for you. What? You know where, if you do a certain hand gesture. And it goes, gives you the thumbs up. I was on a Zoom where someone was telling me a really personal sad story. Oh, Jesus Christ. And it was a director. And it was really like lovely that they were opening up in that way. And I was listening really intently. And I think I just went like this or something. And balloons started flying. No, no, no, no. It was the laser show. And it got dark all around me. And then it was rave lasers. And I literally was like, I'm so sorry. Did they laugh? No, they were like, it's okay. Okay, like, got it. I was like, this is the worst thing that could have happened right now. And I'm so sorry. It was terrible. I don't know. I don't think you can turn that off. I mean, you should be able to because it's really inappropriate sometimes when it happens. It was the worst. It was horrible. I didn't get that job, obviously. I don't know how you actors do it. Well, you do because you're auditioning now. I am. And it really hurts every time. It doesn't stop hurting. But you give the best advice about it. Like, it's not meant for you. I give the advice that I wish I listened to. When it comes to me, there's no consoling me. Right. But it does make me feel slightly better. Like, all the rejection is worth it when I can actually give you advice on it. But I do believe that, like, either a role was always yours or never yours. That's true. Do you, like, do you think that, like, it hurts more when you're closer to it and you don't get it? - A hundred percent. - Okay. self-tape and don't hear anything back you're like well yeah you know who cares right when they're like they're really interested do another one you're you start to get excited even if it's a project that you weren't excited about before suddenly you start caring about things that you didn't actually care about right um and then they're like and we actually sold it we saw more of you and we don't like it then you're like oh okay it hurts it hurts i don't know if i'm very good at auditioning um but i think you're also the kind of actor that like you're just gonna get roles because you're so right for it well i don't think i can do something that's not doesn't check out with like my i don't think people would buy it like what like i don't think i could remember the other day i tried to play straight and i you were like just do it i was like i don't think anyone's gonna buy this i didn't get it so i mean people say that i can't play straight either what yeah that was my big feedback when i did bottoms as they were like my one note is that like we don't believe that kaya's straight i mean i didn't think my character was straight she was written straight so i didn't think she was straight so i didn't think she was but i definitely was not believing it was bottoms the first acting thing you ever did no i did american horror story ryan murphy i forgot about that and was that was it what like were you like did you grow up watching american horror story yes i watched every season which is your favorite okay i have two okay i love i love the first season it's like near and dear and also the twins in the beginning bodie and kai i went to school with them so that was huge in my town it was like bodie and kai have hit it big they're an american horror story Then I love Colt, which is, I know, weird. Wait. When Evan Peters has blue hair. Did I watch Colt? I watched Coven. No, I didn't watch Colt. I watched Coven. Especially now in today's climate, it's actually so good. You should watch Colt. It's really scary because it's like super realistic. What's it about? It's about like a political campaign and a cult. Oh yes, I never saw this. You should. Evan Peters is so good in it. Okay, I need to watch it. And I was freaking out because I'm like the biggest American horror story fan. And they kind of pitched the character that I was playing to me. I mean, they didn't pitch it to me. I auditioned. But then they explained the character. But then when they explained the character, they were like, it's kind of like the modern Tate, who was Evan Peters in season one. And I was like, don't do this to me. And I got to wear the same shirt that says normal people scare me. And I freaked out. My performance didn't hit the same as Evan Peters' performance. Well, don't say that. It didn't. And that's okay. We learn and we grow. But I loved doing that show. And I'm such a fan. And then I also loved Freak Show. Did you watch that one? That was the circus one, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I did actually watch. I watched some of that one. Where Sarah Paulson plays the conjoined twins. Yes. Perfect. You've seen Coven, right? Yes. That was like my. That was your favorite. That was my big one. I love that show so much. It's just exceptional. It's exceptional. And now you get to work with him again. And now I get to work with him again. It's very exciting. Yeah, I love him. And the premise of the. So I keep interrupting you. Have you noticed that? I don't think that you're interrupting me. I think we're having a normal conversation. Thank you so much. Thank you so much. So what is the concept of the shards? It's that it takes place in the 80s and there is a murder and you go to Beverly Hills High. Yes. No, that's not correct. But the premise of the shards, it's kind of auto fiction. Okay. So auto fiction. Auto fiction is it's like autobiography slash fiction. So it's like when people kind of retell. Next time I'll use context clues. Yeah, it's like a retelling of someone's life with fiction. Got it. So it's Brett Easton Ellis's life story or in high school when he was was around the time he was writing less than zero. But it's obviously like heightened and kind of imagined. But the names are real people that he went to high school with. He went to Buckley. So it's it's sort of based in truth. And it's about a group of wealthy kids who go to Buckley High. And they there starts being. Murders and people start going missing. And the main character, Brett, sort of is figure trying to figure out who did it. He thinks it's this new kid at school, Robert Mallory. And and then kind of how chaos ensues within the friend group and the city of Los Angeles. Not to be so toxic because I know that that's there's murder. But how interesting would your have your high school have been if there was a murder mystery and you were solving it within your friend group? So interesting. That sounds fascinating. Not that I. Don't wish that upon anyone. But it I think that's kind of why I don't know if there was actually a murder at Buckley in the 80s. But I think that's kind of Brett was like, let me retell my high school experience in a little more of like an interesting and right and creepy way. And it's scary. The book is really scary. And oh, that's my type of book. OK, you know what? I'm going to start it tonight. It's scary. After the dinner that I'm making you go to with me. You're not making me. I'm excited. Really? I make you come out all the time with me. Yeah, but I have fun. All of our best friends moved to New York. So we sort of ended up together accidentally. But I'm grateful. And it was a good pairing. It's the best pairing. We met at Travis's wig party, who is now also in New York. Yeah. Well, he's here right now. Oh, he is here right now. Didn't you see him this weekend? I did. Oh, I love Travis. I love Travis. My king. I went to school with Travis. Oh, you. We met in middle school. How'd you guys meet? Um. Like class. He he was friends with this boy named Chris. And they invited me. I was friends with the cool girls, but I was not cool. At all. And he invited us to Chris's house and we like hung out. And then I remember on the first week or it was maybe homecoming of sixth grade. He Snapchat messaged me. Are you coming to the game tonight? To which I responded. Why? Because. Do you think he was asking you on a date? No, I just thought that they were trying to play a prank on me because boys didn't invite me places. So I was very sort of suspicious of the invite or of the ask. And I was like, why? What are you going to do to me there? And now he's my best friend. Well, you and him are my best friends for life. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He's he knows where all the bodies are buried. Friends like those are scary, but great. He could ruin my life. Right. That's what I think about some of my best friends. He knows exactly where it would hurt the most. I mean, truly. But he but he doesn't. Thankfully, that's my Alice. Is that your Alice? Yeah. Alice. Alice knows all. Who's your longest friend? Probably my she. I used to have her babysit me because she was so cool. She was a senior when I was in seventh grade. But like, I just want to hang out with her. But she would only hang out with me when I would. She would babysit me. Amani. But we talk every day now. Oh, she has known me since I was 12. OK. That's probably my longest. Are you the same person that you were at 12? I can feel that from the same exact person. I'm so glad I see videos of you when you're younger. And I'm like, you literally haven't changed at all in the best way. You know what? There's a lot of things I'll critique about myself. I am the same person. And I and I appreciate that I've stayed true to myself. You 100 percent have. And then. And then finally, people just caught on to you. I feel this way about like Charlie XCX. I'm writing you and Charlie XCX. Right. Because Charlie always just stayed true to herself. And then finally, people caught up to her. But she was way ahead of everyone. Do you did you listen to her? Like, what's your favorite album by her? I mean, I loved like obviously like I love it. And all of the. Yeah. All the pop bangers. But I think like the most recent really, really grabbed me in a way that I wasn't expecting. But I've always loved her so much. And I think like it just took people a second to catch up to her. And I think like your success has been people just catching on to you rather than like you adjusting for people. I really try to remind myself of that all the time. I'm really. Yeah. Every time I feel myself adjusting, I'm like, I can't do this. But it's hard because a lot of your videos are based off of comments. Right. Yeah. So do you have to read the comments? Um. Yeah. And like, even if I didn't, I would anyway. Do you read comments? I don't let people comment on my Instagram. Got it. Did you? Was that always the case? No. I'm just too sensitive. Yeah. I, I did for a long time and then I stopped. My therapist was like, stop. And so I did stop. But it's so it's too tempting, like not because I think I'm better than anyone. I'm actually very weak and I would read all of them if they were there. So I just don't. I don't. I can't. Have you ever let like one comment ruin your entire day? Of course. Yeah. Especially when they point out an insecurity you hadn't thought of before. Mine is like. You can call. You can say I'm ugly. You can say whatever you want. When they like critique my character. But how do they know your character? They don't. But they'll critique it anyway. And like, that's what hurts the most. Yeah. Yes. Yeah. Where they're like, this guy seems. Yeah. Like a bad guy. That's insane. That's like what kills me. But like that, because I have such bad OCD and I know this sounds stupid, but one of like my OCDs is that, um, like, and I, I thought I didn't know this until I saw it on TikTok. Somebody was like, no, it's a symptom of OCD. It's thinking you're a bad person all the time or like thinking like you're gonna, you, you are not like, just thinking you're a bad person, like thinking your intentions are bad. It's like a symptom of OCD. Oh, thinking that you did something. Yeah. Intentionally. Yeah. And so like that is. I've always had that. And so when I read that, it like really, it like really upsets me. Yeah. I'm, I truly, I'm like the friend that the next morning has to hear that they're not mad that the people that were with me the night before were not mad at me. Yeah. Everyone's mad at me all the time. All the time. I've never thought you were mad at me or no, I've never, I've never heard of anyone ever being mad at you. They have been. Okay. It happened. The worst is when you think someone's mad at you and they are. Cause you're like, fuck, I was right. What else have I been right about? Literally. Then you go probably the 400 other people that I think are mad at me. I don't even know 400 people. And I assume that at any given moment, 400 people are mad at me. Right. It's the worst. I mean, I have friends who will just text me once a day, not Maddie. you because they know that i probably think that they are it's a really nice thing to do for the people that you care about i'll do it to you can you but you never think i'm mad at you and i honestly would never get mad at you but i don't know maybe can you start doing it yeah i'll do it i feel like lewis like takes care of you so well and like you know what i mean like he would be the type of text you're not mad at you oh yeah you know what i mean it is so nice i mean one especially in portland i felt like he was all of our boyfriend yeah he was my boyfriend he was the group's boyfriend yeah he loves you and will so much he's my everything like i really feel like a lot of the appeal to me was you guys like he was like your friends are amazing and i was like it's a shock that they want to hang out with me um but i'm definitely a lot is being healed in this relationship i can feel it by the way he is like you guys are like healthy i'm gonna cry no it's true we didn't mean it thanks it's true it is i i really feel like if you have the opportunity to date a friend do it because like it just is so much better yeah like i never want to fight with my friends i never want to be mad at my friends i respect my friends it just is like a whole other thing and i think sometimes you forget that you like someone when you love them so i've never heard someone explain it that way so it's like you don't want to fight with your friends but when you view someone as like just a boyfriend or just like i can like i'll fight with you like i truly feel like sometimes in relationships and i know you've never been in one but you will learn this um you get to a place where it's almost impossible to understand how love can get you there like you're like how can we get brought here by love right and like what like how how is this love like how is love the thing that carried us to this point of like hurt and pain and anger and all and resentment and all those things when like love is supposed to be a really beautiful thing um so i really think like if you can date your friends you should or date someone that you would be friends with anyways right don't date someone just because you're like sexually attracted to them and uh are in lust with them you should sleep with those people right for sure right but you don't need to make them your partners thank you c geek for sponsoring tonight's episode um my code has changed because the other one got leaked to people that do not watch this podcast it is now just therapist for 10 off your c geek order and with that being said let me tell you why you should use it there are so many concerts happening right now there's lord on the ultrasound tour there's renee on the bite me tour there's megan maroney on the mi okay tour she only has eight shows left i'm about to personally see it myself this thursday in la i cannot wait um but there are just so many people on tour oh tate mispossessive world tour i've seen it now twice it is quite literally one of the best shows i've ever seen in my entire life there are so many shows to see in such little time c geek makes it possible to see all of them by providing you with the best deals on the best seats if you go to the app and you put in where you are they will show you popular events in your area that could be sporting that could be a play that could be a musical that could be a concert that could be a comedy show and then when you scroll and it shows you the seats it'll give you um a little uh ranker from one to ten one being not the best ten being the best and that's how you know if you're getting a good deal on those seats there are so many incredible artists on tour right now and c geek really does make it so simple to just see all of them at an affordable price in great seats once again that's code therapist for ten percent off your order you can click the link in the description of this video and it'll download the app and automatically add the code to your account to use that's code therapist for ten percent off your order thank you c geek for sponsoring tonight's episode wait so it's about to be your birthday so i guess when this comes out it'll be past your birthday oh also i'm taking the 11 p.m on the third so you can come to dinner 7 30 great i'll be there can i bring my luggage of course do you care not at all why would i care cool i'm so happy you'll be there i'll be there i need my best friend there i and i need to go to my best friend's birthday it sounds good doesn't it it feels good it feels so good yeah i can go and i'll leave at nine or i'll leave at like 8 30 but i'll go but you'll come yeah maybe i'll come to your house before that's cute let's do that yeah okay gorgeous thank god i'm so excited are you so excited for life of a show girl like you already know like it's gonna change we were at dinner when the announcement happened and you had to excuse yourself i said everybody well first of all i told everybody i said i'm just letting everyone know uh i think it was 9 p.m i am gonna have to leave dinner no it was it was 9 12 for us it was i'm gonna have to leave dinner for five minutes to experience this it was also so funny because it was a group of boys only who didn't understand the gravity and what it meant to you right and so you had to excuse yourself and they were all kind of like what's going on do you remember and then do you remember i was guessing what it was gonna be before yeah i was like you were so wrong i was so off what was the name that you guessed it was like cosmic cosmic love love cosmic cosmic burn like because i was like it's orange it's like it's reds it's orange it's cosmic it's life of a show girl so i was so excited i was off and are you happy about the engagement i threw up i almost threw up like i almost threw up i almost threw up i almost threw up i it's just because it's she's been singing about wanting this for so long so like seeing it come to fruition is so awesome you can find love you can find love yeah it doesn't matter how long it takes so much heartbreak and you can still find love it's so true and i think she's the champion of that she is it's like you can date as many people as you want you can make as many mistakes as you want and like eventually you're gonna find that person it doesn't matter how long it takes also like the way that their love story played out i thought was really sweet he'd literally just like shot his shot on his podcast said i made her a friendship bracelet she didn't get it and then that's how they started do you not know that no that's how they started dating wait what did he do he went on his podcast if i'm remembering correctly and was like i made taylor swift a friendship bracelet because she performed at i think it was arrowhead stadium wherever he wherever he plays he went he was like i made a friendship bracelet and which was part of the whole friendship yes and i didn't get to give it to her and so i remember seeing like the news travis kelsey says like he didn't get to give to her and she heard yeah they're engaged now they're engaged so never say never shoot your shot have you ever slid into someone's dms yeah and i and honestly it's never worked out in my favor so i've stopped i do think like and you're on dating apps too yeah i should just how do you know if you don't know their personality you that's what i think well that's why this guy i'm going on a date with in new york i didn't go on a date with him but then i ran into him somewhere oh and we read like i felt we vibed right it's really hard to tell like sometimes you see someone and you're like no not for me and then you meet them and you're like whoa for me for me right please well that's the issue with dating apps i think is that it's sometimes hard to like just look at someone and be like yes no yes no yes what's your worst date story date story probably the time i went on the date and was this denim on denim yeah and he told me this isn't it it's not a date because i was just so embarrassed okay but i don't think that's your fault but i was embarrassed like i was really embarrassed this is what this is what makes me very sad is like when something like that happens we get embarrassed even though the other person should be embarrassed right like yeah i've been stood up and i was so embarrassed you've been stood up no way wait but it was an accident okay it was an accident he fell asleep okay um but i was like sitting at a bar waiting waiting and i was like this is the most embarrassing thing i'll never recover from this right and then i was like why am i embarrassed but it's like it happens i feel this way also like when people get cheated on and like you feel embarrassed and it's like but why are you embarrassed the other people should be embarrassed right that's so true i feel like it's just like a pride thing maybe yeah or you're like how did i not catch on to that but honestly no it's the other person's fault and it is the the denim on denim boy that was his fault but at the time i was like did i misread things and i don't think i did no no no no no i really don't think i did i mean didn't you meet on a dating app no we met at an after party but it was flirty like i know yeah you're not crazy also you're not someone who thinks that everyone's no i never think people are flirting with yeah i don't think that ever no you know like i'm actually the polar opposite of it and i have to have someone be like no i think they're flirting with you yeah i like you yeah so for me to like think this like no there were had to have been signs some vibes one time the first date i ever went on we went on a second date and he was 40 minutes late but he showed up he showed up but it was 40 minutes late and i was like this just isn't it for me yeah that's also first date you should be on best behavior so if it's already not going well then like it's only gonna get worse but i'm excited to go i like dating in new york a lot more than i like dating in la well i think maybe you have more uh there's more gay people maybe yeah more gay people in new york no i think that it's just in la you tend to only date people who have the same job as you look at me um you it's just it's just it's just it's just it's just it's better it's it's nice to be like there's more options in new york that you're around people who do all different kinds of things did you like living in new york when you lived in i loved it i loved it i came back when the pandemic happened that's when you came back yeah i would have honestly stayed and then i've just been working here which is really nice and like i'm from here but i would like to go back i think but i would never leave you here okay cool i would never do that and you can't leave me no i'm not leaving you here because i was about to say la is about to have a moment i know because there was there was it's Stock is low right now, and the best time to invest is when someone's stock is low. okay it's true no because like i was talking about investments the other day and they were like the stock market's so bad but they're like no but that's the best time you buy when it's low and then and then and la i just have this gut feeling that like we're about to get this like resurgence of like real like pre-pandemic la i hope so i feel it i'm i am enjoying it here right now i like i am loving it here it is i'm having fun nights yeah i drove around out on the street right i mean it will that one wine bar we go to it stayed up until three something i am the other day i know it's so fun and people are like smoking cigarettes out on the street which i don't condone but it just feels like not la at all it's not like new york yeah i know it felt like new york i'm i see good vibes for it hopefully i hope so because you and i are holding it down here we are holding it while everyone leaves down well and charlie and i don't think will and charlie are gonna leave i don't think so either do you think travis will ever come back god i hope so i think so i gotta find my husband here so he comes back quick i know i know do you and travis ever make like a marriage pact we we don't have a marriage pact but i do see like a domestic partnership where we raise our children in the same at least vicinity of each other right um i i hope i have a child that's exactly like travis oh like i truly believe that if i have a son that is exactly like travis i will be the happiest woman on earth you need a gay son i need a gay you are like meant to have a gay son i i'll be dead i'll do everything in my power to make sure you are meant to have a gay son that's what i want i want it so bad of course i'll love my child no matter what their sexual preference is but i would be very happy with a gay son i think that's a really big green flag i always say that one thing i will say about my relationship with travis i don't know if you have this with will or charlie is i'm like some of the people i've dated have gotten off so easy because most of the things that i would require from a partner travis does like he picks me up from the airport got it he's like taking me to doctor's appointments he's the first person i call with like good or bad news so i'm like i kind of have had i rely on him for more things than my partners usually right but now that he's in new york we're being forced to have some independence which is really hard but i think good for us was it sad when he left um it kind of like just happened i that well he because that's what i felt like too it wasn't like like when julianne payton left it was a big to do like i we were crying like i ran after their car like it was really did you actually cry yeah i cried was that the first time in a while in a really long time i was so good and cathartic well i wasn't like sobbing but i was like tears were falling that's great it felt great i love crying i was just sad like because i've lived with julia for four years or three years so i was like when you live with someone and they move it's like oh my god what the fuck is happening no but you also travel so much yeah i go to new york all the time i i also see him all the time we've done like long stints apart it's okay but it was it was kind of like happened during a very busy time and then i was in la with a week of nothing to do and i was like oh he's not i have no other relationships outside of this but now i have you best friends best friends best friends which i think would have happened regardless of travis date or not i don't want you to think that you're like the replacement no and i don't want you to think you're it's okay if i am no but it's okay if those are big shoes to fill that's how i feel about travis we can have all of them in our lives exactly and that's the beautiful thing do you want to get into the tell me what's wrong yeah are we supposed to do therapists oh my god sometimes i forget kaya listens to therapists no no no you don't understand jake i have listened to every episode at least twice it's crazy that you because she'll know she just said nolan and i was like wait how do you know that also was shocked by that really yeah nolan i wouldn't forget you after the whole debacle with the last oh i forgot nemesis number one i would never forget an enemy no actually he's my hero so what are you therapist about i watched barbarian the other night and i had never seen it have you seen it so good i'm therapist that more people aren't talking about justin long and barbarian i love justin long that is the performance of a lifetime did you see his cameo in weapons of course but it didn't mean as much to me because i hadn't seen barbarian yet he's amazing because also he's so funny he's so funny and he seems like such a nice guy so when he plays such an asshole and plays it off well i know it's that much more impressive and when he's was is like down in the basement with the tape measure getting the square footage oh yeah yeah it's i was crying laughing he's so funny so that's what i'm therapist about i think that's what i'm he didn't get enough credit for no like the candles should always stay lit for justin long that's how i feel what else is he and was he in like some 2000s rom-coms i think so is that where i'm like remembering him from he was in new girl what is it he was not in new girl yes he was yes he is wait who is he a new girl uh genslinger oh he's the other teacher yeah he's the other teacher he's like the nerdy teacher on um the turkey day he there's like a thanksgiving episode and don't they find a dead body yes i've never seen new girl i've seen like two episodes i know i know you have to watch it have you ever seen search party no that's cole isn't cola scola and that i need to watch it is the funniest show i've ever seen who else is in search party you don't know it's okay i don't know but it's a really great group of people i need to watch it search party have you seen the other two yes you actually told me to watch that i love so funny what are you therapist about what am i therapist about um a hush pose maybe maybe that i don't know what for dinner yet i think we should go to santo i want to go to santo i think that's what we should i want to go to santo let's do that but i don't want to force lewis to do something that he doesn't want to do you won't be but one time i had sushi from because one time we were at secco and they made me sushi at santo do you remember that now you worked the room until you got exactly what you wanted and i was so impressed i came back to the table with a plate of sushi and it was really good which is why i had like eight pieces of sushi and i was like okay at midnight are you a hillstone girl no okay so i notoriously used to hate it and i've fallen in love with it what do you get there salmon nigiri it's the best salmon nigiri in los angeles at hillstone yep really yep you would be shocked okay will you take me yes i will take you okay so should we i can't believe you remember therapist no one ever remembers that not even julia or them i when i tell you i don't like being in silence because i don't want the thoughts to start creeping in and so i just listen to therapist over and over again and when you released two episodes last week i was yes what did you listen to willis of course how good was well you were unwell i i've never seen you like that i had like i've never been so hung over and i what did you do was that the night after wait when did you record that it was then was it after we went out and then you went out after we went no yep it was that night it was that night yeah that was that night that's brave to do an episode the next day it was that night yeah and um yeah i was terrified i woke up terrified that's the worst feeling i haven't had a drink in three weeks and i have to say my anxiety is better and my sleep is better i'm not drinking this week okay and i feel great am i and i feel great isn't your sleep better yes i just was like oh you everyone wakes up with crippling anxiety and then i was like no no that's alcohol actually turns out i do miss weed though i've been thinking about it a lot i was quite the stoner and i just um you gave up i gave up it didn't it never agreed with me but i just thought it will eventually start agreeing with me right it only got worse i think that's how i felt too right like you can you can like convince your body that it likes it eventually but it made me creative at points which i needed okay but i think that was creative in a way where you revisited it and you were like that's a terrible idea well i don't know because when tucker came on he was telling me like that's what i used to tell myself and it's not true he's like i used to tell myself that it made me more creative that it made me this that and third and like it just wasn't true wait you know what else i'm therapists are out what when you brought you were the original sally girl and no one more time about it you were the original sally girl and like natalie portman was so cute as sally i watched that video so many times great she was amazing but you were the number one sally girl tucker likes to forget don't i'm not letting anyone forget tucker likes to forget he ranked his favorite sally's the other day stop were you in there no wait what was the ranking i forget what was the ranking i forget but i wasn't in there and i was like oh he's kidding he's just it's a joke it must be he is very funny i don't know i don't he's hysterical he's funny he's hysterical but i think about the fact that you were the original sally girl thank you you started a big trend thank you you know what i think about it following in your footsteps i think about it a lot too i i'd be lying if i say i did if i said i didn't and i i do think about it i would think about it all the time i was like damn like i did that where where was the concert where were you in dallas and it was right after my show in dallas and i went to go see him and he he wanted to he has a song called slut interlude and he wanted to dance around me like one one less lonely girl and so i was like oh that sounds great yeah but then he was like no actually come on for sally and like jump around and i was like that feels anxiety inducing so that's why i was on for so short because i went on and i was like oh i can't do this anymore and i jumped off because it was scary no one had done it before i haven't been asked yet so you haven't no you would make a great sally thank you i think so too the offer hasn't come in yet but it'll it'll come eventually it'll come he's done with tour it's never happening by the way what if we were sally's together don't play with me should we yes should we see if he's coming here yes just coming on our lolas jumping around it's low-key really scary at least for me it was But now I don't know if it is because people know what to do. Let's get into the tell me what songs. So my boyfriend is leaving for college nine hours away and we are staying together and doing long distance. When I was saying goodbye and helping him pack up, I found a box of condoms in his bag. I'm not going with him. We've been together for a year and have done long distance before. Should I kill him or tread lightly? Okay. Should I take it? I mean, you know I can. Unfortunately, I think I should take this one. I think I'm going to first play devil's advocate and then I'm going to decimate his character. Okay. So I think there's a world where he was bringing them with him so that when she comes to visit, he has condoms unless they don't use a condom. And in that case, run. Right. What I will say is if there is any suspicion of cheating, leave, go. Like that's enough. There's this wonderful column called Dear Sugar. When I was in a similar situation, my friend showed me this advice column and there's this thing, there's this like kind of poem that she wrote where she's like, go because you want to, because wanting to leave is enough. One more time. I thought you were so moved by it that you had to take a moment of silence. No, no, no. I picked up on it for a second and then, okay, it's go because you want to. So in it, she's like, go even though you love him. Go even though he's your best friend and you're his. And then the end is go because. Because you want to, because wanting to leave is enough. Like, I don't think, I think that's enough proof for this person. Right. Like, if you feel it, your instinct is usually right. If you feel it, like, don't second guess your intuition. So leave. Leave. I mean, yeah. If he's bringing a pack of condoms and you're nine hours away. There's no reason for him to have that. You know what I prescribe? What? The Other Woman. Ah! It's a great movie. I love you so much. I love you! You know that's my favorite movie. That's my favorite prescription to give. Really? Yes! Leslie Mann should have gotten an Oscar for that movie. Yeah. Nicki Minaj, too. Nicki Minaj, too. Put Nicki Minaj in more movies, honestly. She killed it. She's a theater kid. She's a LaGuardia kid. Is she? Yeah, she went to LaGuardia. All the greats go to LaGuardia. Nicki Minaj went to LaGuardia? Yes. Who else went to LaGuardia? Sombra went to LaGuardia. Azealia Banks went to LaGuardia. Wait, this is an insane roster. Who else? Timothee Chalamet went to LaGuardia. Right? Did I make that up? I think I might have made that up. No, I didn't make that up. No, I think he. No, he went to LaGuardia. Did he? He went to LaGuardia. I'll fact check. Give me. Nolan. Will you get me a list of people that went to LaGuardia? Because it is extensive. But you didn't. Where did you go? You went to school in the city. I went to school in the city. I went to the school called Calhoun. Calhoun? And it was like. We had no walls. It sounds like an improv troupe. I think it was an improv school. Like it felt like everyone was improv-ing? No, it felt like the school. Like they didn't really know what they were doing? No, yes. Okay, great. Did you call your teachers by their first names? Yeah, of course. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Timothy Chalamet did go to LaGuardia. Michael Shea, Zazie Beetz, Awkwafina, Jennifer Aniston. Ooh. Lots of people. Ansel Elgort. Oh. Omar Epps. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. Al Pacino. Oh, wow. Wow. Wow. I was just diagnosed with. You know what I would prescribe, actually? Leave Get Out by JoJo. Yep. Yep. I was just diagnosed with OCD at the age of. At the age of 37, it feels so strange that many of my patterns and behaviors had had a connection for the entirety of my life so far. Nothing's terribly wrong, but I just feel strange with this new information. What tips or tricks do you have post-diagnosis of something like this? You're diagnosed with OCD? Yes. I knew, though, like since I was seven. Yeah. I've never been diagnosed, but I exhibit all the behaviors. Right. Yeah. I think, if anything, it should give you some peace that like, you're like, okay, that makes sense. Like, maybe this person feels like frustrated that they didn't catch it sooner, but like. Yeah, but I think like. It's hard to catch a mental illness. Yeah. Take the information and like, at least now you have context for it. Yeah. And there's things to help you. I'm restarting exposure therapy soon. What do you do in exposure therapy? So, like, I have a hard time. I used to have a hard time adding songs to a playlist. Why? Which sounds really silly, but I used to have to add it four times. Add it, delete it, add it, delete it, add it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And so, like, for example, during exposure therapy, they would just have me add it and I'd have to sit there. Yeah. In the uncomfortability and like, have it be added, which sounds so stupid. I would be so bad at that. No, it doesn't. It was really hard. Because I was like, now I just knock on wood, but it. I feel like if I talk about it, it's going to come back, but it's fine. No, don't. Honestly. Or am I going to give it to you? That's what I'm scared about. I just used to have to say something if I thought a bad thought, but then saying it once wasn't enough, so I had to do it three times. Oh, I've done that. And then I had to do it three times, three times. Yes. And it was just very consuming, time consuming. So, like, in exposure therapy, they'd have you think that bad thought and then not say that. And it's scary, but it's the most helpful therapy I've ever done in my entire life. Oh, amazing. Ever in my entire life. It changed my life. Okay. And I stopped too soon, but I'm going to restart it soon. Yeah. I'm excited. Great. One of the participants in a thruple I'm a part of just got pregnant. Me and the other participant, if you will, are now torn on whether or not we want to find out who the father is. Wait. Wait. So, two boys. One woman. One girl. I'm on the side of clarity while the other guy doesn't want to know and wants to just raise the kid all together. What do you think we should do? Oh, no. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. Oh, I would watch Mamma Mia. Oh. One or two? One. Two. That's. Both. Yeah. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. Think about the kid. What do you think the kid will want? What's best for the child? I mean, I think when the kid comes out, you'll know who the father is. True. You will know. That's true. You will know. Yeah, that's tough. My boyfriend just got a pet snake and is obsessed with it, and I'm not even kidding. It's affecting my ability to finish with him in bed. Like, how do I suck up the ick because that doesn't even make any sense? Help. I think she's icked out that her boyfriend got a snake. Oh, I would think that is so sweet. I would find it so. Like, I'm like, if you have a pet rat, absolutely. What? A rat? I love a weird animal. Okay. Okay. I mean, I had a pet squirrel for a while. I didn't know you could domesticate those. You can't. It was a biter, Banjo. Okay. I miss her. Was this when you grew up? It was not as long ago as I wish it was. When was this? It was like four years ago. And how did you have Banjo? Banjo was a sugar glider. Banjo and Turbo was a brother and sister. And where did you find Banjo and Turbo? Nashville. Like, in Nashville? In the wild. No, no, no, no. They were pets, but you can't really domesticate them. They're nocturnal. I'm just the wrong person for this because I love weird animals. Right. But I do think that I am like the person who has like the longest ick list ever. But I do think if you actually like someone, icks don't really apply. You've told me that before. And I think you're correct. Like, let yourself be surprised because sometimes an ick is just that you're over the person. And like you're looking for. For any reason. Because I think if you were madly in love with someone and they got a snake, you'd be like, aw. They got a snake. That's so endearing. I think it's sweet. I love when like boys get nerdy about that stuff. I know. What do we prescribe? Is there like a. A snake's on a plane. That's. That movie gave me nightmares. I've never seen it, but I prescribe it. Is it good? I couldn't fly for so long. There's a scene where a snake comes up from the toilet. What? And I literally couldn't use the bathroom on a plane for the longest time because I was like, the snake's going to come and bite me. Sorry. Now that we're talking about movies again, you need to watch this. And I know that it's a TV show. I'm just like thinking about how you haven't seen it. And it is so mind blowing to me. Like, do you like soap operas? I don't know if I've really watched. I mean, I watched Grey's Anatomy. You would love Scandal. Oh my God. It's the best. It's made by the same person. I promise. Do you like Grey's Anatomy? Oh, is it Shondaland? Yes, it's Shonda. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Sorry. And you know what? Dare I say Scandal is better than Grey's Anatomy? Well, careful. No. Careful. I'm telling you it's better. Is there a musical episode of Scandal? Because there is in Grey's Anatomy. No, there's not. But the music, the needle drops in Scandal are all like jazz songs. Oh. No, and they're so good. Okay. Okay. Like there's one scene where they're like, you know, okay, do you know like the premise of the show? It's like the president and Olivia are like in love, right? Like you know that, right? They're in love or they're having just like a sexual affair? Like a torrid affair. Oh, okay. And there's a scene that's so heated with them. Did you learn torrid affair from Taylor Swift? Yeah. I did. I fucking did. There's a scene where like he's like, like watch me earn you. Like watch me choose you and what's the song playing in the background of it? It's like, I think it's Sam Cooke's Nothing Can Change This Love. Nolan just. Like my nipples are hard. Like it seriously. Mine too kind of. Like it. And they played the most beautiful rendition of Bridge Over Troubled Water the other day. No, it's amazing. Okay. Okay. It's amazing. You love a needle drop. You love, you love, you love. More than anything. I'll tell you my favorite. I'll tell you my favorites right now if you would really like to know. Yeah, yeah. I want to know. Girls season one, episode three, Robin dancing on my own. Oh, yeah, yeah. What about, okay, there's a really good Fiona Apple song, Valentine and girls when they're all dancing in a bar. You know, I've never really listened to Fiona Apple and I know I need to. I know I need to. We have to. It's okay. We can be different. I know I know I need to. I know she's like one of the greatest of all time. She is. And I think especially like the girls that you love now are all influenced by Fiona Apple. Right. You should. You should. I'm going to. Yeah. Do you have a favorite needle drop? No. Should I? No. I can't. I don't. I mean, no, I don't. You never watched Mr. Robot, right? No. You've been telling me. There's a scene in Mr. Robot in season three. I think it's season three, episode seven. and they have this song called In Time by Robby Robb, and one of my favorite needle drops I've ever heard in my life. Also, Crowded Places by Banks and Girls was amazing. Oh, wait, isn't 212 and the Bling Ring? Yeah, iconic. Iconic. Iconic. Also, this isn't a needle drop, but there's, in the movie The Skeleton Twins, have you seen this? No. Bill Hader and Kristen Wiig, my two favorite people in the whole world. Wait, I've heard of this movie. What is it about? You will love it. They're twins, and he tries to take his own life and then moves back in with her, and it's like when she still lives in their hometown, and he revisits this teacher that he had an affair with when he was a student, and it's devastating and so funny, and they're just so electric in it. I love when comedians play drama. Oh, my gosh. It's so good. They're both such great actors, and there's a scene where they sing. Fuck, what is the song? Oh, Nancy, we're crazy. Oh, my God. We can build this, whatever. We can build this world together. Nothing's gonna stop us. I think it is that song. Okay. Whatever. It's really, really good, and that's one of my favorite musical numbers in a movie of all time. Also, what's the one in Grey's Anatomy when Katherine Heigl is running after Danny? Is it How to Save a Life? Yeah. Is it? No, it's Chasing Cars. Those, to me, feel like the same song. Yeah, for sure. Are they both The Fray? No, one's. Nolan, you would know this. It's Chasing Cars. Snow Patrol. Snow Patrol. Snow Patrol and How to Save a Life is The Fray. Yeah. And then I'm trying to think of other, like, I'm just like a whore for a good needle drop. Yeah. Oh, the finale of, have you ever seen The Hills? No. They do an acoustic version of Unwritten in the finale of The Hills. It's amazing. Oh, the OC when they play the Image and Heap song. Oh, what? Yeah. Yeah, Hide and Seek. I've never seen the OC, but I know that scene. Wait, is it the Image and Heap song? No, no, no, they play Hallelujah. No, and they do the Image and Heap song. They do both. You were right. It's so good. I love Hallelujah. So many versions. My boyfriend. I love Hallelujah. My boyfriend of over a year is slash was kind of addicted to weed. He recently claimed to quit for me, but one of our mutuals told me he smokes a lot behind my back. What do I do? The problem. Oh, hi, Emily. The problem is not the weed smoking. The problem is the lying. It's a jinx. Yeah. Jinx. I agree. And also, like, quitting for someone, I've never. That doesn't. Like, when I quit weed, I quit for myself. You can't quit for someone else. Yeah. You resent them, and then it's too much pressure. You have to choose for yourself. So if he quit for you, that's like. He didn't really want to quit. He didn't really quit either. Yeah. Have you ever seen the show Dope Sick? Yes. With Caitlyn, who you had on, who I love. Changed my life. It's. That show is so upsetting. So upsetting. Have you seen Birdman? No. No. Is that the one that was, like, shot in one shot or something? Oh, my God. It's so good. Is he in it? Yes. He's the Birdman. Okay. Got it. He is Birdman. I'll give it a watch. Also, in the same. This is not to compare opioids and weed, but warning, this drug may kill you. Oh, I've never seen that. What's that about? It's so sad. It's about the opioid epidemic in the U.S. Just to bring the mood down a little bit. Right. But it's really good. Is it a documentary or a movie? Documentary. Okay. Oh, interesting. I'm going to watch it. Yeah, watch it. I used to watch, like, so many documentaries about that. It was, like, a weird phase. I was going through a weird time. I have this almost strange supernatural ability that almost every single curb, wet floor, or slushy is. Wait. What? I don't understand this one, and it's giving me OCD, and I can't. Okay. She's saying that, like, she trips on everything. So do I. Like, wait, I think. Hold on. What's the problem? Yeah, that is what she's saying. That is what she's saying? Yeah. She's like, how do I deal with embarrassment? Not the fact. Oh, I don't know. The problem. The problem is. Oh, I have a good one for this. Okay. Should I finish reading it? Yeah. Okay. Just to give her the floor. Yeah. I have this almost strange supernatural ability that almost every single curb, wet floor, or slushy is either being tripped or on or tripped into. Like, I am the clumsiest bitch in America. It has nothing to do with anything. Eyesight, contacts, mentality, mentally. Sorry. And I just have to do with me having zero spatial awareness. It ruined graduation. It's ruining dates, and everybody finds it funny, but, like, I'm so sick of it. I might be hopeless, but please help. Okay. This is not a real problem. Right? It's not a real problem. Everyone trips all the time. It is embarrassing to trip when you're not with friends, because. Right. You know people saw, and you. But here's. This is what I do. If I trip, I just look at the nearest person, and I say, are you okay? Do you really do that? And are they like, what? It just confuses them. Yeah. And then it, like, gets the attention off you. So if you trip, just look at the person next to you and go, are you okay? Are you the type of person where if someone's arguing with you and they say something really mean, do you go, what did you say? So they have to repeat what they said. That's a really good tactic. No. I've never. I just feel like you would be emotionally intelligent enough to do that. I do a version of that on set sometimes. Like, if someone asks me to do a pose that I don't want to do, I'm totally outing myself, but no one that I work with is probably going to listen to this. I think it's okay. Where if they're like, can you do this pose? I go, I don't understand. Can you show me? And then they try to do it, and they're like, never mind. Because it's weird. Because it's weird. Right. Yeah. Kaya, what did we learn today? Oh, my God. Oh, my God. It happened so fast. This was amazing. It was so fun. Dare I say, one of the best. Stop. It was so good. Oh, Nolan never says that. You have to say that, Nolan. I don't have to. Nolan, have you been nervous in front of anyone? Yeah, who have you been nervous in front of? Benny Blanco, because I'm a huge fan. Yeah. Charlie. Yeah, I was nervous in front of Charlie, too. XCX. Ed Sheeran. Ed Sheeran's my favorite. Yeah, I love Ed Sheeran. I just love him. He's amazing. That episode is so funny. That was the first house call we ever made. That was like the first. First, when we did Tate McRae for the first time, we had done two episodes with friends. Oh, yeah. I was nervous for that. I was like shitting bricks. And Glenn Powell was one of the first. I was nervous for Glenn. But he's so disarming and sweet. Even though I love Glenn, but I was nervous because he was the first actor we had on. Oh, yeah. Yeah. So I was nervous. Well, besides Rene, but Rene was promoting music. He was promoting a movie. Yeah. So what did we learn today? I learned that your husband's going to love you so much. Thank you. He's not going to love you as much as I love you. But he's out there. There's time for you to find your husband. That's what I learned. I learned that I have to watch Scandal. You need to watch Scandal. And I learned that I have to watch Birdman and I also have to watch Blonde. Yes. And I have to read The Shards. Please. Which I already knew I was going to read, but you've sold it on me. If it. I wouldn't recommend you a book that I didn't think you'd like because I don't need you to hate reading any more than you already do, but I think you'll love it. Have you ever read A Little Life? Yes. Is it as sad as people say it is? Yes. Okay, I need to read that. You. You're reading that book and you go, can't get. Things can't get worse. That's what everyone says. And then they do. And there was. I was sitting at the pool the other day and the woman next to me was reading it and she was about halfway through and I literally looked at her and I go, you have no idea what's coming for you. She was like, la, la, la, la, la, la. And then I was just like, you're about to get wrecked. Will just read it, right? Yes. Got it. Oh, where's Will? We should invite him tonight. Yeah, double date. That's why it's gorgeous. Well. What did you learn? Oh. You know what? You just might be. You're my favorite guest ever. Don't say that to me. What did I learn? I learned. I'm glad I was so impactful. No, I learned. I learned. Fuck. No, there was something you said that really. That just. Oh, oh. I learned that reading is a muscle. Yes. And that you have to practice. You're not just good at reading. Yes. And date your friends if you can. Date your friends. If you can. And. Yeah. And I love you. And I'm not mad at you. And you're not mad at me. Thank you so much. I was waiting for that. Thank you. I love you. I love you. Do you want to give a little bye, pussies? Where do I look? There? Where? Right there. Where? Oh. Bye, pussies. Yay! Yeah! Bye! Bye! Bye!