Session 130: Lisa Barlow

You're just baby gorgeous. Your energy is magic magic. Well, many is back for another intro because we got another housewife on therapy. Yes, the ball of the queen. And I have Lisa Barlow from many and I is talk about Lisa Barlow is important to God. Lisa Barlow is God for us. Lisa Barlow is God. I think she is one of the most important people in my life. Me too. Me too. She inspires me. She motivates me. She really motivates me. Me too. And I, you know, some people stray from certain housewives when they do something that they don't like. And all I have to say is you need to watch episode one of the latest season where Lisa Barlow is not in it because she was doing big and important things. Yes. And she was mentioned like how many times over 60 times in the episode was it because that's how important she is to the show. Yeah. No. And there, it felt like a big loss that episode. There was something missing. There is no Salt Lake without Lisa Barlow. I agree. I just think what I love about her is that she is so unapologetically herself. Yes. She could have six different housewives looking her dead in the eye saying you are wrong and she will look right back at you and say, I'm right. Nope. She believes everything she feels and says with such conviction and that's what's inspiring about her is that she's like, this is me. This is my truth. This is how I feel. Take it or leave it. I don't care. And she's so funny. I know. She is so amazing singer. And an amazing singer. And she's got so much better. She's gotten so much better. We talk about this episode that she's done vocal lessons. We talk about her vocal warm ups. Her debut single, Baby Gorgeous is out now. Oh, also I don't know if you guys saw on my Instagram, but I'm doing a giveaway with headcount because voting is one of the most important rights we have in this country. So just click the link in my bio for a chance to win a base time from me, like a little fun therapist session from me and a PR package from Cauches. Once again, voting is vital and extremely important and headcount is an organization that makes sure that we all have access to that. Also in the giveaway package is the Puskasino Cauches merch that we wore in Vegas that I don't think we're ever gonna sell. So you get to take action and have the chance to win fun things. And also be reminded that voting is extremely important. Thank you headcount again for working with me and getting the word out of how important it is to vote and making sure everybody can. And tonight on Therapists, we have Lisa Barlow. Hi Pussies. Welcome back to Therapists. Tonight we have on the Queen of Salt Lake and New York. Baby Gorgeous Lisa Barlow. Oh my gosh, I love that word together. I love that word together. You're like me made to be together. We're like kids, Matt, we're all the things. I miss you. I miss you too. How's life been? Tell me everything about this new single. Oh my gosh, do you love Baby Gorgeous? Your energy is magic, magic. I mean, you haven't warmed up my voice yet, but I could do better. I promise. No, you sound amazing. What was it like recorded? You know, it was okay. So this is so crazy. You're going to see this on season seven, but my first time in the studio ever recording anything musically related was on camera. So you're going to watch the whole thing, but it was like a little like, oh, I guess we're doing this and there's cameras here. I can't really like mess up. You know, it was wild. Was Meredith like, how was Meredith supportive of your musical journey? Meredith is always supportive. I think, and like I'm supportive of her musical stylings by Meredith Marks, too. We have some funny moments this season that you're going to like love. Let me just put this out there, hypocrisy and bullshit, bullshit. You're going to like want that in your head all the time through season seven because it becomes a thing. What was season seven? What was filming? My favorite season I've ever filmed ever. I actually enjoyed the whole entire thing. I was sad when it ended because I loved it and I loved it. It was like my favorite season. What did you love about it? Our production crew. We're amazing. Oh my god. I'm so happy because last time we spoke after season six, you were like, yeah, you were like, I can't. Maybe I'm done. No. No. I mean, that's how I felt. After season six, I kind of was like, I have a really nice life and why do I jack it up once a year. There's parts of me that loves it because it makes you see yourself in a different way. You push yourself. You create new boundaries, new guardrails. That's what I liked about doing the show, but then you watch the edits and you're like, who the fuck is that on TV? You know what I mean? This season I felt like I was 100% free in me. I felt like a total sad girl like living my best life, having the best time. Yes. And I felt like I got to be free this year. And there's so much drama. There's so much of what people love from Salt Lake, but in such a different way. And it's so good. What's different about the drama this season than the other seasons? Listen, they're all so crazy. So like, were you on good terms with right now? You know, it was in flows. I can, I can mitigate any situation in any dynamic. I think me and Meredith are like going to be really solid forever and ever and ever. I mean, it would take like so much like chain saws and like crazy stuff to split us up. I love my dynamic with Meredith, but I can kind of like move through the group. How is your relationship with Angie? Um, it's like the same. So not that. You know, like you'll have to see the journey of it, but it's like the same. Yeah. There's so many things they want to ask you about. Can we go? Can we just like, okay, let's take it all the way back to season one. Okay. When they were casting for the show, who were you closest with? You know, um, I helped bring the show to Salt Lake. So I had already had a reality show pilot filmed on me. And I like love the experience. We had our different restaurant. I think they were like, oh, she's like a young Lisa Vanderpomp. And we're going to do this with her. And because of like my relationship with different, um, like networks for Sundance, I think people, and I don't just do Sundance. I do like so many other things too. But, um, I think they were like, oh, there's a good TV show. We have to film her and do this. So I did the whole pilot. Henry was so little that we were up in Park City filming. And I could hear him upstairs with our nanny crying for me. And I finished the pilot. And then I was like, I'm giving it to God. Like if it works out, it's meant to be if not, it's not in the timing for sure. Wasn't right. So like, I always kind of knew something was going to happen in that realm. And John and I were taking a walk by the golf course behind our house. And I'm like, I'm going to have a TV show this year. And he's like, okay, you're going to have a TV show this year. And I'm like, yeah, I am. And then literally the star is a line in three people called me with the same person's number. Randomly, they didn't know each other. And they're like, you have to talk to my Gleene. And I'm like, this is so crazy. I keep being told I need to talk to my Gleene. I was in LA. I was actually here for like the AFI awards. And, um, like, she's like, can you meet me before? And I'm like, sure, but I got to be ready to go in a glam. So I got like an hour and a half. And we met and she's like, we're doing this. And I sent her like hundreds of names and like, just go down the rabbit hole with each one of them. But like, I help kind of assemble the cast too. Everybody's connected in some way or another through one of my friends or a friend and stuff. So in the beginning, it was Meredith. Like Mary. That was your. That was my girl. So she moved to Park City from Chicago. Her gay bestie was best friends with my gay bestie. And now they're married. And they're like, yeah, they got married. Happy Pride. Happy Pride. And, um, so we knew they had great taste when they tried to like pair us together. We're like, oh, it's fate. We're meant to be together. So then me and Meredith were like, okay, we're doing this. And then she does not like to be tied down. Like Meredith does not like one zip code. It's just not. It's just Sagittarius too. So if we like to fly, like it's, I, if I didn't have a Cap Moonsine, like I would be out of Salt Lake. Right. Yeah, I'd be like a Scalowag or what, how do you say that Scalowag? Or, you know, like that word for people that just like go all over the place. Yeah, like a nomad, but in high school, like history, they're like, there's Scalowags. And so like, she doesn't like to be tied down. So she was, you know, living. I think she was back in Chicago, still had a place in Park City. So I'm like, you should do this with me. Let's do this. And it just kind of worked out. So it was like really good. I mean, I feel like you guys are my family. Like we are. I think you are. Like, well, you're my father. We're sure related. Yeah. Well, you were related. But like, you know, you did, but later time in life, the show really kicked off when Jen was arrested. Yeah, it was wild. Like, wild. Did you understand how big of a deal it was? was in that moment when the FBI surrounded the sprinter. - No, you forget cameras are around you. I always forgot, like since season one, like I forgot a mic, that's why I had a hot mic moment. Like, you forget all of that stuff, but I remember sitting in the van and I was like, she got up, her energy was really off. And then when she got that phone call, it was like, I have to leave. We're like, okay, what's going on? Like, nobody would have ever in a million years got like Homeland Security, the FBI and my PD was going to show up. And she had told me this crazy story about this guy that got locked away on like, I mean, like Alcatraz type of situation, like he was locked away. He was never going to see her again. And I was like, oh my gosh, you got out of jail and he's coming to kill Jen. Like, that's the first thing that went through my head. It's like this guy that she helped lock up is free. And her life is in danger. I thought it was to protect her. Do you, would you be open to film me with her again? Or is everyone like, no, no? I think that Jen has a lot of charisma. And she's really funny. And when you get around a great day, she's like the most fun person ever. We used to have long chats at night. We're like, I got massages like every Sunday and Wednesday. So Jen would call me through all my massages. And like, I put her on speaker phone and we'd laugh with her. Like, my massage therapist loves her. And it's like, she's crazy, but she's so funny. So she has this charisma about her. And it's like, really natural and neat. She's fun. But I don't know if it's a good thing for her, any of us. Right. But no, I wanted to be happy. I wanted to be thriving. I wanted to be like, you know, with her children and her husband and her mother and everybody else. Like, I think that's important. And I think she's, you know, if she's really sorry, she did restitution and she's paying for her mistakes. So she's out, right? Yeah, she's out. She's a free woman. Have you seen her since? No, not at all. [LAUGHS] Has anyone in Salt Lake seen her? No, I think she talks to Meredith every now and then. Wow. Yeah, I think they'll like, she'll call Meredith randomly or Meredith will check in with her. But I don't think anyone has like a deep friendship with her. OK, you mentioned the hot mic moment. Yes. Did you know in that moment, you were like, oh, fuck. Or did you-- Oh my gosh, no. So I left the table because my feelings were so hurt. And I was like, you can see I'm like sitting next to Meredith and I'm like rolling my eyes. But I didn't like, you know, in my interview, they asked me, did you make up all that stuff about Meredith, or is it true? No, Jen almost beat me up on the van on the way down there. And Jen was saying the craziest things about Meredith. She's like, you're fucking best friend. Who does this, this, and this? And then said all the same things at the table while we were eating dinner. And then Meredith and Jen were in a full-on fight at dinner. So I didn't come up with these things. I was so upset with Meredith that I was like, you're not my fucking friend. You can't even stand up for me. Like, I'm always alone, but I always defend you. And so I almost got beat up for it. And I don't think Meredith understood the magnitude. Yeah. For me, I just left that table. I took my mic off. I'm really good at that. I know what to do. So I took my mic off and they said they boomed my door. But I was walking around like a crazy person. So the next day is when I figured out, like, I ranted. And so that's when you realized, like, you were fine. Oh, yeah. And then I was like, what else did I say? And then I didn't think about it. And then I remember feeling really, really hurt by her. And then I went down to the room and like, Meredith and I got into it. And I'm like, you're the fucking liar. Like, is I'm like, I didn't say anything about your dad because that was coming from two other girls. But I thought she realized I thought she only heard the hot mic when the episode aired. Oh, that's the only time any of us heard it. And what was that like when that came out, were you like, oh, my God. I don't really like the night two nights before the reunion. Right. I was sobbing. I couldn't even talk to Meredith. I called her and I said, go watch episode 18. You're going to hate me. And I just hung up. And she always let me go watch. And I'm like, you're going to hate me. And then I didn't hear from her. Right. Yeah. How did you guys make up? We had it to have two years ago. The hardest hitting conversation. I literally sat in a Walmart parking lot on the phone with her for like an hour and a half. And we just had the hardest hitting conversation. And then there were subsequent hard hitting conversations where we just talk through everything and gave context to our feelings, the situation. When you're in that situation too, her feelings were obviously her. I think if it came from anyone else, it wouldn't have bothered her as much. You had been like, I just, you're whatever. I think because it was me, it was like worse. But if you listened to the way things were being said, it makes sense. Like her and Jen were going at it at the dinner table. And if you really hear what Jen was saying in the van at the dinner table at my Vita tequila food court party, it's all the stuff I said in my hot mic moment. It's just, I kept hearing it and shutting it down, hearing it and shutting it down. And then I just was so hurt. I was like, well, maybe this is true and blah, blah, blah, blah. And you know, just, you know, lost my mind. Right. I remember it. So I mean, it made for great television. And I'm happy that you and Meredith are now. I'm human. Oh, yeah, and I'm human. I mean, I can't like that about John Barlow on the daily. Like, I'll be walking to my room like, oh, I don't know. You're also from New York. People forgot. Oh, yeah, we verbalized all of our emotions. Right. Feelings like when I moved to Utah to go to school, my mom's like, you have to leave here immediately. No one thinks you're pretty. They all think you're ugly because nobody did what they do in New York, where you walk down the streets and they're like, hey, girl, hey, my mom's like, no one even cares about you here. You need to leave immediately. And like, I think when you come from a culture where it is, it's my DNA, like all of New England, the East Coast is very different than the West Coast, where people just say exactly what they mean. You get over it, you move on. I would say the bad truth is better than a good lie. Oh, I love that. Yeah, my hot mic moment was not any-- there's no truth to it. But my feelings were raw. I was hurt. And I think that's just the way I grew up. You say things you move on. And I think it's way better to just get it out than to sit with it and then just give people bad vibes. Right. Right. You can feel that. Yeah. No bad energy. How is Brittany been this season? She's like butterflies and ladybugs. Yeah, I love-- I mean, she's chasing rainbows in her head. She's somewhere over the rainbow. So she's not here? She's here. She's here. But I want to say physically, mentally, she's in a different place. And I think that, like, people are going to have to tune in to watch what happens with Brittany. But like, she's, you know, part of me, like-- I was like rooting for Brittany. And I think last year, with the whole plane incident, with them making up this ridiculous story about what happened on the plane, it really made me see people very different. Like, I could never just both lie about somebody. What happened on the plane? Nothing. Meredith vented to me. Meredith sat by me the entire flight. So Heather was across the aisle. We had Whitney Mary here, Brittany in front of us, and then-- Wait, so we painted for me. OK. So here's me and Meredith on the-- looking, coming down the aisle, if I were like, you know, the flight host, I would be to the left. Heather was across the aisle for me. But if you're looking forward, like, out of the plane, it's like me and Meredith, Heather here. Whitney, Mary, Brittany, stranger, Angie up front, production right behind me. And so what happened? Meredith was really upset because Brittany on below deck came into our cabin and kept being like, gassing Meredith up and being like, Meredith did look hot in her bikini. So she's like, you look so hot in your bikini. Oh my god, I'm in love. Like, you look so good. I just love you so much. So Meredith is like, just stop messing with me. She's like, basically, stop fucking with me and we're fine. And then when Brittany came out at dinner saying, like, oh, your husband was in an Uber and I think he's cheating on you. But I'm just trying to be a good girl's girl. Meredith was like, we're done. And so I was in a villa with Meredith before we flew out. And she woke me up early the next morning. She's like, we've got to fly out. We've got to get ready to go. And she's like, I'm still very upset about last night. And I'm like, I get it. I understand how you feel that way. And then we had to take this crazy 1960s prop plane to another island to catch like a real flight to New York and on the flight. Because you know, it's a far away island. It's not like an easy to get to. If you have a super yacht, if you're Jeff Bezos, it's perfect. Right. Or Michael Jordan. It's a great island to go to. But like for us, it was a little rough to get to. And so she just vented to me the whole time. She's like, she's like, I got set up. I'm so upset. She was emotional. She was crying on the plane. Yeah, she was just only talking to me. Brittany had headphones on. And Gina behind us couldn't hear. So I got up during one part of the flight and said, hey, Gina, Meredith's really upset. I think you should call our showrunner and let her know. Meredith's super upset. Like, I feel horrible for her. And I think someone who needs to talk to her when we get back to Salt Lake. And she's like, OK, and I'm like, can you hear her? And she's like, not at all. So not even a little bit. But the only person Meredith talked to is me. What about the shaking of the sea and the water spelling? didn't happen. No, not not while I was awake. Right. Not at all. Okay. Not that I saw, not that I experienced. I don't see Meredith doing that. Could you see it possibly happening while you were asleep? No. I just don't, Meredith's not that type. Okay. Meredith is just just even really, it takes a lot to get her to yell. So like the, you know, she said some mean things about Britney to me. You know, just some other stuff she felt. Yeah. Yeah. And so, but like it was to me and it's not like she was screaming it. Like you would have to try to listen to Hero. Got it. Got it. Okay. And so the plane was, well, the plane was like the crux of that season. Oh, yeah. And so like the fact that they all were like, okay, now we're going to use this as a chance to like fake rally around Britney, uses as an excuse to like treat me and Meredith badly. That was the problem last year. And that's, like it made me just totally shift my energy. How I felt about how they handle situations, how they treat me. Because I mean, like I was getting it pretty bad. The first half of the season, they were trying to convince convinced Meredith that I'm this horrible human being in this bad friend. And she shouldn't be friends with me. And it's just like the, you know, like incite divide kind of tactics. And so it just kind of got old. And so this season I went into it with like, okay, we have zero fucks now. Right. Like you're, do you feel like you are, you've become immune to criticism from outside world? Cause you're like, oh, beyond, beyond immune. Yeah. Yeah. And when other people get upset, when they're in a situation where they have to just like answer simple questions, I'm like, you have no idea what I've gone through. Like this is nothing. But I am so immune. I mean, the public can be really mean too. So you just get like, you know, like I've always had thick skin. And I have like an innate sense of self. So, you know, last season, some things got to me for the first time ever. Like I didn't love it. I had a hard time. How did you bring yourself back to being like, I can do this. This is my job. This is who I am. I'm here for a reason. Well, I woke up and I was like, I'm just baby gorgeous. You are just baby gorgeous. But now what kind of helped me to like, remember like, it's so cliche, but just like, remember who I am. Like, you know, and then I get in the van and I tell the girls, I'm like, nobody is like really real here. Like, I was like, I don't really know that much about you guys. Like, I like depth and dimension in my relationships. Like, I want more. I give more. I'll give as much as you guys want me to give as long as like, you're like hearing it. You're receiving it. And like, we're all in this together. But like, I, all my relationships are deep. I don't have shallow relationships. I'm friends with all my friends from kindergarten. I'm friends, best friends with all my friends from college. Like when baby gorgeous came out, like my kindergarten friends were messaging me. My sixth grade bestie was messaging me. Like, all my mom's friends, you know, and so I'm like, I'm used to that. It's like so different for me to be around like such shallow relationships. So I wanted more and I feel like I'm getting, I feel like I'm getting more of that. How is your relationship with Heather? Because at the beginning of season six, it was great. Complicated. And then at the end of season six, it was not so great. She complicated it. I like was all in and she has, you'll see coming up soon on ultimate girls trip and on housewives. Like, like, I'm a very forgiving person. And when I forgive, I move on and I don't go backwards. Right. She made it hard for me to want to do that. Why? You'll see very soon. Oh, I'm so excited. Who's on it? You Heather? No, me Kyle Richards, Jizzell, Portia, Theresa, Vicki, I'm missing somebody. Luan. Did Alicia not do it from Rhode Island? No. But you know what, we, you're gonna see like we get to meet all the Rhode Island girls along the way. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, that's what I'm thinking of. Yeah. So yeah, she's really cool. They came out of the gate. Like, when I met them for the first time, I'm like, oh, yeah, this is going to be epic to watch them because they have no filters. Have you, have you been watching parts of it? I wish I could watch more of my schedules, but not, but I see a lot on social, you know, I think like just with how crazy my schedule has been to sit down and watch a full episode has been hard, but they're amazing. They're amazing. Oh, yeah. They're amazing. I think they're so great. I think it reminds me of home. Like, it's how I'm used to like interacting with people. You say what you mean. You get over it. There's so much history. It cuts a little deeper, but then forgiveness is bigger because you've had such deep roots with these people. You've known them your whole life. And I think that that like the show creates one bond, but when you have like long term relationships with people and you start doing something like this, you have a different kind of bond that doesn't ever go away. It probably, there's times where they'll probably think they're like, never going to make up, but they all will. Right. You can tell. Was there a moment for you where you're like, I am never making up with this person ever? Yeah. I'll make a show every season. And then stop how you do. Yeah, but I don't like to sit in negativity either. I just think it's so harmful for our bodies, but I do have guardrails. I do have like, you know, walls that I've put up with certain people where like I can be fine with them, but we'll never be friends. Right. Not like the way we used to be. Right. Yeah. There's there's a couple of them that I'm like, you will never know me. You'll know surface me. You'll never know me. With me. You know, there was a time when I think Whitney was going through some really hard stuff. And I'm glad that like we could have a good friendship there. But I mean, I just I just require different things than I did five, six, seven years ago. Thank you, Seakyk for sponsoring tonight's episode. You guys, it's the World Cup. It's the World Cup. And the World Cup is taking place in America. And the best place to get tickets for the World Cup is on Seakyk. My friend just went to England versus Panama and said he had the best time of his life. And it made me want to go to a World Cup game so badly. Brett went to one the other week like Julia went to one. Everyone is going to the World Cup. It looks so much fun. What I learned from basketball is that sports games are so fun. And the best place to get tickets for these sports games are on Seakyk. You can also use my code therapist for 10% off your order. If you click the link in the description and download the app it automatically applies the code so you can have 10% off your order. Seakyk is the best place to get tickets for any event. Whether it be sporting, whether it be music, Gracie Abrams is going on tour. Ariana Grande is on tour. Ryan Beady just announced his tour. There are so many incredible people on tour. 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My personal favorites are strawberry lemon, cherry lime made, cherry lime is my all-time favorite. So I just poppy. And it's a better for you soda with only 5 grams of sugar. Poppy. So does back. But so much better. Thank you poppy for sponsoring this episode. I support all their businesses. So Meredith's caviar. Oh Mace, I love her caviar. And then what? I love her caviar. And Meredith makes beautiful jewelry. Right. Yes. Yes. Yes. Oh you have a great stack going. I always have something Meredith Marksson. One of these is hers. And I thought this was hers. No, it's not. I love a stack. How's John Barlow? John Barlow is amazing. Is he, you know, he's my favorite house husband. Oh my gosh. In your his favorite ever, ever. I die for him. He loves you too. I love him. He's doing amazing. I think, you know, John never really gives a lot on the show because he's always been like, this is your thing. And he'll be there to like, he brings like humor to the show and he's really witty and dry humor. But this season, I think like, he opens up a lot more. He did a lot last season too. Yeah. And I think you'll see like a continuation of that and like where he was coming from. And like a way that was shocking to me. Right. Like literally like, it's all over my face. You're like, we'll talk later. Yeah. Like I was like, oh my gosh, we need to talk later. Yeah. I'm going to take a week off. Right. Yeah. Like I'm taking a week off, maybe a month. And we're going to have a conversation. Right. But it was like really good for both of us, I think. I'm married and together for a very long time and has he so you grew up Jewish? Yeah, I'm Jewish by heritage Kind of my dad was agnostic and my mom was just always searching for Faith like I think that was a big thing. So when the Mormon missionaries knocked on our door. She's literally was like I've been praying for you two cute boys and suits what like wild and it took my dad a long time to convert like he was Not like it wasn't his thing. I don't think it was something he he didn't miss it. He never had it. He didn't You know his mom died when he was seven and a half and I think that you know He kind of like found a way to like you know my grandfather's amazing and he my dad had amazing family members that stepped in when his mom died But he didn't have like Somebody that was like we love God and like let's focus on faith and like structured religion and my mom didn't really either but like want today and so that's when you convert it to Mormonism That's when we converted to Mormonism and then how do you juxtapose? being Mormon and also Doing things that are inherently not Mormon. Okay, like none orthodox like you know like you know, Seth Marx is the one that came up with Mormon 2.0 Uh-huh, and but I always say I'm not an orthodox. So I've never had Like I just live my life and I think that's what God wants like from a religious standpoint Like I love God. I give everything to God like I have prayers answered every single day. I'd like believe it I'm like a true believer in God and I think that for me I don't think God judges me. I think you know church is an open door. Everyone's welcome I've never put I didn't grow up in Utah either, but I've never put religious pressure on myself It's more like my I put pressure on myself to be just show up in a good way I like God like I just want to be myself and I think All faiths evolve like the Mormon church You know, it's like there was stored gospel of Jesus Christ and Mormons is a nickname But the name of the church is like the church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints Mormons love Jews, by the way Mormons I think are very Jewish with the exception of like accepting Christ as like the Savior instead of a rebel rabbi So like that's I mean, it's a big deal But Mormons like are like love Jews, so I think for me. I'm like I'm double-blast Yeah, you are double blast double blast But I think you know, it's not hard for me I just want to be myself and even with Jack going on a mission We did our best raising Jack Jack has to make his own decisions the mission We never talked to him about it. That was a hundred percent his decision He kept it so private and we just had like a really like great mom's son talk Three days ago where he's like mom you were done raising me long time ago I make decisions based on my beliefs not yours. I make decisions based on who I am not based on who you are And I was like I love this so much like you don't even understand. I love hearing this from you It makes me feel resolved as a mother like that You like feel so confident in your ability to make decisions for yourself and you're like you know like how you're choosing to live your life Like that makes me so happy, you know, how's his life post mission amazing? Oh, you're gonna be seeing a lot of Jack soon. I'm so excited. He's his own project without me and John and it's so good and He's happy he's bilingual like fluently completely fluent. He works really really hard He works he moonlights at our lounge works his brand fresh wolf. He's shredded. He's so cute. How is the lounge the bit the lounge is amazing We need to do your birthday party there. I know that's what I'm saying. I want to fly everyone out to Utah And I want to do my birthday party at the beach to kill out making this happen. And it'll be the best end of my life The best night of our life. I don't know if you can tap Europe your Europe trip look pretty amazing It looks amazing So much phomo I wanted to be running down the streets of Monaco with I think we were running down the streets clubs every night I know I felt it with you. You were at what's it called? Oh my gosh. What club did you go to? It's a lilies and then we went to some other first-name club. Oh my gosh. Yeah, I know and it's like the best one I know exactly where it is. I saw you guys running through the streets and I literally was like I need to be there Oh, he would have been perfect with you there. It looks so fun. Oh my gosh. It looks so fun. I'm going to Paris for the first time this Sunday I've never been to Paris. Oh, you're gonna thrive in Paris. I'm so excited I'm sure you're gonna thrive. What are you doing in Paris? I'm going to the Dior show. Yeah, amazing Thank you. Yes, you're amazing. You're amazing. Oh my gosh You know you're my favorite housewives of all time. Oh my gosh. Thank you. You know what's funny is like That's such a nice sweet thing to say and I love you so much for that I forgot I'm even on housewives a lot of times. Wait. What do you mean? Like is that crazy? Oh because you're just like I'm her Yeah, like you know, oh my gosh speaking of her do you have you heard that country song be her? Oh yeah, by L.O. Langley. Yes. Are you obsessed with that? Can you sing it for me? She drinks wine by the glass I gotta take a I gotta take a sip real quick. Okay. I love this song. We should turn it on and sing it. Uh-huh Not by the bottle. I just got nervous and I never get nervous. No, no, no. The lyrics here. I'll turn around. But She drinks wine by the glass. Not by the bottle. She ain't Stuck in the past ain't worried about tomorrow. You know who she's thinking That about I'm convinced it's her self Oh, what do you mean? I think that song is about her When she's like I just want to be her so bad at her so bad to me when L.O. sings that song it's really about her self And she's like oh yeah, it's like who she really is Oh, I love that so introspective. Yeah, I feel like when I listen to it it reminds me of my mother too Like I called my mom and I'm like this song is about you when I hear the song I think of you Because she's so authentically herself and like if she were on the show people would be obsessed with her She's so cool your mom. Yeah, she'll never do it. She wouldn't even let me stand next to her in public But wait, why won't she do the show? She um, she just loves her privacy. Okay, but she is like a hundred percent her But when I heard L.O. Langley singing that I was like she's singing this about herself How in what it's like the way she sees herself to me right right when she sings that I'm like I feel it so strongly I want to ask her someday but like I'm like she has to be singing that about herself the way she really sees herself What else are you listening to right now besides baby gorgeous You know what's so funny we went to the AMA's and I was like My nieces love Katzai and they are so hot and their outfits are the cutest thing ever But like I kind of like I'm like I never thought I would be into Katzai. I like love them I like love country right now love country. Yeah, I like love country music right now And like I love the way L.O. Langley's doing it too because it's like a cross popovery Kind of thing, but that song ice cream sing in the car and I like love it so much my favorite is choosing texas. Oh, yeah She's from texas. I can tell by the way. She's stepping down the room That's like such a good one too, but all of our songs are so good I haven't warmed up my voice where I would full-on sing for you. I've been in vocal lessons for two years What three years? Yes. Yes, and I do this whole warm-up thing You know if you blow bubbles and your drink you can sing better if you just warm up like this Like sing your favorite song with bubbles in your glass Okay, it'll open up your throat so much. I'm not kidding you and then you'll be able to when you start singing You're gonna sound so good It like stretches the muscles in the back of your throat. It's so good. She's from oh wow. It's clearer Yes, yeah, you do that for like three sing the song three times through and blow bubbles. It's like amazing I do I do blow bubbles every single morning not this morning because I couldn't get Coke on fountain Wait, I got it from a glass bottle at the hotel and that you don't you hate that no, I hated that yeah You need it from a fountain. I needed from 7/11 or similar. Yeah, are your Wendy's diehard die coke Wendy sounds so good. It does what's your Wendy's order for those that don't know oh my gosh Well, I love the nuggets. They can't sound best nuggets ever if you get your nuggets anywhere else. It's sad Because then you're just getting grease balls with a little chicken inside and that's gross There's a difference. I like eating everywhere. I'm a connoisseur Dave's single burger is unbelievable. They have all the accoutrements on that on that burger Like it's like the perfect Mayo lettuce onion everything blind. That's like next level So like the burgers so good the attendees are amazing their cookies are supreme. How are you not the face of Wendy's? I am you're the face of Wendy's right now kind of Yeah, I've five years. I have like commercials with them four times a year. Oh, that's amazing And you have your Wendy's cash? Um, yes I like love Wendy's. It's like my favorite place to go every single day. I'm there like they know me by name Right. I don't even have to like I drive through they know my order already they hear our voice They see our car roll up and they just know. Does John love Wendy's as much as you know what I mean? Oh yeah, John's there too. How did you and John meet? Um, okay, so John went on a Mormon mission and he his dad went on one to John's adopted. He has like a crazy Like adoption story um, and he was adopted by a great family his dad went on my mission to Paris where you're going yes and missions were really long back then now they're like two years I think it was like three years back then or two and a half his dad's like 80 and John thought he was gonna go to Paris and so my sister you know we're in New York we have no idea who this John Barlow guy is obviously never met and so she's dreaming of going to Paris on her mission and you don't get to pick where you go so she gets called the Vegas and I think she wanted to be like I'm not going and and John got the same call he got called because he was he grew up all over like Germany Florida Texas California Chicago his dad was an exec with IBM so then when he got called to Vegas he's like are you kidding me like I think he was like all my friends are going somewhere cool I'm going to Vegas so they met on their mission and she we would hear about John Barlow non-stop to the point where I was like I hate John Barlow and I haven't even met him wait why just like hearing like this cute guy John so cute and he's like perfect and he's amazing and blah blah blah blah and so I was at BYU she came out she finished her mission was at BYU John was off his mission at BYU and one night she's like let's go over to John Barlow's house I'm like I hate John Barlow like I don't want to go and she's like he's a cute friend you should come so I bought ice cream brought it over the friend annoyed me so bad I literally got my ice cream out of the freezer and walked home because I was like I can't stand being around this guy and and she was like crushing on John but he didn't like her so he went on like one day and like I think they kissed once like nothing like serious and he was like not we're not meant to be together he actually got married to somebody else and I remember like he sent like an announcement to like our house and I remember opening it and thinking I could have married him and just throwing the announcement like on the bed and like you know seven years later I run into John in Utah and my sisters like you guys we should all go to a baseball game and I'm like I'm not I didn't want to go because I didn't like him because he didn't like my sister somewhere I don't know loyalty thing you know with your family yeah so we end up going to a baseball game and we started hanging out we were just like platonic best friends and one day I'm like I love you and he's like I love you and now we've done together for 25 years wow yeah it's been a long time so what was BYU like amazing when I was there it was like the best school on earth like the best school on earth could you break the rules and drink everybody broke the rules okay yeah like everybody broke the rules like all like I lived off campus I lived in like the most killer townhouse and then moved into the sickest condo we went to Vegas every weekend some girl had a hook up down there so we drive this guy Jordans like sick cars down on Friday night come back Sunday night before school and like spend like the weekend laying out by the pool like I don't even know what my friends were doing I still don't want to know what they were doing we'd go to other frat parties for other colleges and like would anyone else try to like get you guys in trouble with the school no never okay I mean I didn't hang out with any of the Utah kids like all of my friends were from like Boston, Connecticut, New York, LA, like San Francisco, Texas like none of my friends were born and raised in Utah it was like such a separation between like the born and raised kids and then the like kids from out of town Lisa what are you therapist about today oh my gosh so many things tell me everything I hate showers that don't have really good wands like water pressure no like you know the wand to like like if you stay like the first thing I do when I check into a hotel is I check to make sure the shower has like really good wand system and like jets do you like it what do you mean a jet like you know how they have the sprayers like for your body like on the side of the side yeah and like a wand so like oh yeah I'm not a wand person I care about water pressure my water pressure my shower is atrocious is it bad so bad wait what like it's like spring I don't know I need help like I don't know what you do I think we can get you help today somebody like shaker shower head with like it's like sprinkling down I have to like you have to call a plumber okay the plumber yeah you have to call a plumber like immediately you need a new shower head and they need to like check your hot water heaters okay you need multiple okay so you're like with showers as there it is to bats oh yeah I'm neurotic about my showers like if they don't have a one day like want to check out immediately I don't like you know like summer it's Carlton's don't even have a wand you're like who's not updating your bathrooms right like that kind of stuff makes me really mad I 100% get that yeah this episode of Thera place is brought to you by booking dot com booking dot yeah the other day I was on my phone and I was talking to my best friend Alice and we were looking at old photos of when we were in Santa Barbara together and it made me really really really want to go back so after now planning a trip to go back to Santa Barbara with booking dot com we both have very very very specific needs we like to make sure that we're able to walk because I can't drive so it's always nice to be able to walk into town we I liked it I need air conditioning we both need air conditioning a lot of it and so these are things that we are able to put into booking dot com to help us find the best place to stay we can also rent a car on booking dot com we can make the trip full-rounded and I need all the help we can get every trip I take we always use booking dot com because it makes it the easiest possible way to book the trip it helps us really get from the idea to the actual destination which is sometimes difficult so we are gonna go on booking dot com and find the perfect place to stay at in Santa Barbara because we are not just letting this be an idea go on book that trip it's easy a booking dot com booking dot yeah book today on the cider in the app you know I went into the season and I'm like this is what I did for myself that I think made me feel so good I was so enabled they just let us do what we needed to do uh-huh to like tell our story and that for me was the best thing that could have ever happened to me I'm so excited to see the season I loved it and you know people I hate me and I don't care I just was like I I'm never cared but like now I really genuinely don't and I just feel like you know you know I got accused of doing so many things I've never done I wouldn't even think to do like my brand doesn't even work that way and then to like have the freedom to just be me be her you know I will Langley said of us just be her felt so good take me rock to that boat trip when everyone was accusing you of shed and you went out on the deck and called John and now one of the most famous scenes and Salt Lake history I was so hurt yeah like I that those were such genuine feelings and cries of hurt and I talked about it at the reunion it didn't make it into the show I mean there's so much only so much time but we you know to get to a destination they can when we were there early so you stay on the island for two days before you got on the boat so Heather was having a hard time we took Heather to the Tiki bar I got a golf cart picked her up snuck her out of her room we were like doing karaoke and having the time of our life before we got on the boat so I was shocked when she's like you're the source I'm like I'm the source you're the one that has all the issues right me I I have issues but I they're I don't care about I don't care enough about them to raise them like you're the one that cares more you're the one that was crying you're the one we took out of your bedroom and like so how am I the source and when Bronwyn actually got on the boat she accused Whitney of being the one that leaked the stuff about her she's like I was told by some blogger it's like a well-known blogger that it's Whitney and so I was defending Whitney and then Whitney turned it on me and then Heather turned it on me that night and that trip was awful for me like I was like literally by myself like I felt so isolated how do you deal with the fact that Meredith doesn't defend you in that situation Meredith I understand her so she it's not like we grew up so differently that like I do what I need to do and Meredith can do what she needs to do I'm like I set it at the reunion I'm like I can I can go fucking solo like I can I can Lisa Barlow take I can speak for myself I can take care of myself I'm fine and you know sometimes my feeling you know there have been times where my feeling gets hurt and I talk through them but I think for me I've I have just learned to do this in a way that feels so comfortable for me now and like so like like I'm at peace with so much that you know I can interact the way I want to interact and get what I need from it yeah yeah does that make sense that makes sense yeah but you can't I can't put expectations on people where like it's like when people are like you get so defensive and I'm like I'm defensive because I'm mad and because it's offensive you know and so for me I've just like you know just figured things out and stuff but I can't Meredith is gonna always be Meredith and I'm always gonna be me and I think and I think I like you know one thing that I told John last week in the car that I really need from the show more is individuality because I value individuality. Like I think it's so fun to have our fans that are individuals that align with us and feel us and like, you know, like you and I have like a natural like connection and like we get each other in such a natural way. And I'm like when you have that with someone it's so great but I don't wanna skin you and wear you, I just love you for you and you same with me. And I think like on the show when you're in a smaller group, I think like for me one thing I've really craved and like work really hard at is just like seeing how people are real individuals and like what I love about them as an individual if we're getting along or not getting along and I just really wanna just be me. Yeah. Like that's my power is like just being me. Be her. Yeah, be her. And I think when I feel like that's jeopardized, that's when I'm like the most defensive. Yeah. And then that show gets hard. Yeah. Well I'm so grateful that you had such a good experience during season seven. I mean I don't know how that is gonna be but I had so much fun doing it. And I never get mad at the edits 'cause you can fix it at the reunion. And like I don't prep for the reunion. I just have to show up and remember either through remember how I felt or how I would feel and I'm fine. Right. I have a really good memory too. Yeah. Oh you do? The helps, oh yeah. Well it's something you can memorize that like other people can't. I don't know if I can remember things but like Meredith is always like if you wanna know what happened just ask Lisa 'cause she'll remember it in detail. Right. And I pick up on weird details too. Right. Like interesting details. Things I think are interesting. So. Manie is the number one fan of this show besides me. Do you have any questions for Lisa before we get into the tummy what's wrongs? Every time I hear you speak in any interview or like any little clip I see online you have or you seem like you have such self love and like such confidence. And I know this is like kind of like a broad question and also I feel like a very like common question but I really like feel it from you. How did you like cultivate that? How do you have such self love and like do you have any advice for someone that doesn't not me a friend? Yeah. Yeah. (laughing) You know when I wrote Baby Gorgeous you're gonna see the process on the show and like I cried throughout it because oh I don't want to get emotional. Hold on, I'm gonna, I was bite the inside of my cheek so I don't. I used to think emotion and crying was weakness. It's a superpower. It's a superpower. All of our most successful friends, like billionaire friends that are sold, and I'm not bragging, I'm not dropping names I could but my closest friends, they all cry when they talk about something they care about because and you can't be successful if you can't feel. Like I don't want to be around someone that doesn't have feelings. Like just done. Like if you have no, if you're on a permanent beta blocker like not one you need but like one that you just don't feel it's sad and it's like draining. But when I was writing Baby Gorgeous I sat with Jett and Jake and I'm like I'm gonna give you a pep talk because everybody goes through it. Like you're gonna see John goes through it and John is like handsome and bold and strong and witty. Everybody goes through something where they're like jarred like where their self confidence is jarred, right? Or their like ability to see who they actually are as jarred and so I'm like I'm gonna give you a pep talk and I just started talking and it became the lyrics of the song and I was like you're entering I was you know giving it to my two friends like that I'm co-writing the song with and I'm like your energy is magic if you feel it happens you have the power to like make anything happen and we turn it into a song but I think since I was a little girl I'll never forget going to this girl Michelle's house and her mom had me over I swear just to tell me how ugly I was and like just to be mean I was in fourth grade and like I'll never forget it I remember being that little dress I had on what her mother was wearing, what room where we were in the yellow ugly pillows on the couch and and feeling sorry for her mother that she felt like she had a little like I knew I was a kid and I knew she should know better. I felt sorry for her mom and I still feel it to this day that the only way she could feel good about her child was to make me feel like shit and I had another girl Tina in high school her mom did the same thing in ninth grade we were all at their summer house and she was the mom relentlessly every chance she got and I just put up a wall and was like I am better than this like for real and not better than people I'm better than this like and it just doesn't impact me and I think like you know I give a lot of it to God I'm like seriously like love God and I have like such a good relationship with God like when I said I'm important to God like everyone should feel important to God like you should feel that you should 100% feel it like I matter what I think matters how I feel matters I matter and I think when people get so caught in the chaos of like life in the world you forget that like it's easy to forget like oh my gosh I matter you know even with baby gorgeous it's so fun like one girl is like sent me a video and she's like I'm crying listening to like the lyrics it makes me like a little emotional 'cause I'm like and I'm like people should feel good about themselves like do you know what I mean? It's like you should wake up and feel good like it's special my you know what I follow a lot of on TikTok my nephew has he has cerebral palsy and it's not bad and I watch all these kids with cerebral palsy like talking about their story and my nephews is in like yeah thanks Jake, you're like what do I do with these? But I watch my nephew and like the struggles he's had like I remember him saying like oh my gosh no one's ever gonna love me and I'm like any so gorgeous and it didn't affect his speech it affected his arm when he's born and he's so cute and I watch all these kids on TikTok talking about their cerebral palsy and like how it's hard for them to talk and they're like I'm grilling it inside but I have a hard way expressing it and I'm like that's so beautiful and like they find beauty in everything and I think you said to find like you know God made all of us like some of you have harder hardships they have health issues they have physical impairments or deformities and stuff but there's beauty in everybody and everything and I think like when you start to feel that about yourself it's hard you have to remind yourself like it's a beautiful thing and I've just like never allowed other people's thoughts about me when I know me to change it that's why like in my song it's like people think you're lost out in the dark but you're just shining like in the stars like it's really powerful and I really wanted people to hear that and like just get that in your head 'cause even if you don't really hear the words at first it's just like a catchy Bob then you really start to hear the lyrics and it's like no like you are like people that judge you online chain they don't know you they don't know your magic they don't know your energy they don't get to experience what we all get to experience with you that you're like funny and witty and charming and cool and like everything they just like want to take from you and then it's like easy when you learn like no you don't get to take from me I this is beautiful and special about me and we all like the weirdest things make some of us the coolest people and I think it's just like embracing all of that and like understanding that and like I am so much more accepting of other people because of that like I feel like you know I don't really look at other people's weaknesses as weaknesses I just am like oh that's like that's rough I'm sad for you or like you know or like you're never gonna get a piece of me again like you know what I mean but I think it's I think it's I think some people have to work harder on it but it's also like allowing your mind to open up to the point where you're just like that doesn't matter it doesn't matter yeah I matter I matter to me I know who I am and everyone has special gifts too like not everyone gets the same ones we all get special ones oh that makes me think of the song in such a different light yeah like it really has so much depth it's like a good pride song too you know what I mean and it's like don't let anyone tell you who you are don't let anyone mess with your you're like entitled to and what you deserve you know and people are gonna judge you but it doesn't matter and like this way it's like we don't walk we strut you know like you can go your own way if you have something bad to say and just remember that if you read something negative you just be like go your own way and you're just baby gorgeous yeah you don't belong here baby gorgeous is just some people write me things to me and I'm like oh you have bad energy bad energy you're not baby gorgeous your energy is really bad thank you for sharing that yeah and I just like like I hate being like a crybaby about it but I think like so many people need to be reminded like I want to write a book for kids on confidence oh my god that would be amazing just like a little cool book that would be amazing about like how to build your confidence and like where to be confident you know because I think like it's like something we all need to remind of our world is mean it you should not be this mean because you didn't have to hide behind cheeto stained fingers and like a keyboard like you had to say things to people's faces you had to see the reactions you had to see the hurt on their faces you had to deal with the repercussions to your actions so you would feel bad like I remember everyone I was mean to right and like I regret it and like feel bad I mean I 10 years ago I made apologies to people where I'm like I said this I don't know if you remember but I'll never forget it and I feel bad you know you like you took ownership of oh yeah because i'm like it was wrong because you remember their reaction but now everyone can just hit sad and forget about it but they don't like the way it makes them feel when someone's mean to them but they have no problem doing it to somebody else but i think like i like love john will always tell me he's like you'll always come home and say oh my gosh i'm met this person and i'm obsessed with him you're going to be obsessed with them and he's like you find all these like crazy unique things about them and then when i meet him i'm like i see them differently or like i'm like oh i would have never picked up on that and i think it's just like finding that in other people and then it makes you love yourself more in the process i really but i and i know you said that like you didn't want to cry but i think when you cry like it makes you human it makes you so much more human because like a lot of people like see reality i always feel like people see reality television stars as characters but it's like at the end of the day it's real it's real television and that's what you were saying it's real life and so i like every time when i see you cry on television like i feel it and i know that's real oh yeah and it's and like i said too it's like i used to think it was such a weakness i'd be so embarrassed if i cried and i'm like no it's like feeling you're being in tune with like you know your feelings about yourself but i think it's like i think people i think you guys are gonna love watching John's story this year too i'm excited i've never been this involved he liked the show and it was like so good for us i think as individuals and for our marriage i think it was so good are you nervous for his how he is gonna like receive i think he's gonna hate it he's gonna hate it but i'm but i'm like we're so like obsessed we're like in our own little bubble like i like last night i had to sleep at the hotel without him and i we cross legs when we sleep like we're locked and it was like i'm like oh my gosh i missed your leg on mine and we don't have a perfect marriage i mean we fight like last season i thought when i watched that one scene of us having lunch when we filmed it it didn't bother me at all i didn't think twice about it when i watched it i was like do you love me right like i literally was like you don't love me anymore you would have never quipped at me if you love me i'm like john you don't love me anymore what are you talking about i always talk to you like that and i'm like no but it felt different when i watched it back it like broke my heart like i cried for three weeks what's it like watching yourself back like that like you come out of your own body and like that view yourself is not when i watch that's the only scene my hot mic moment took me out like i mean i really like shit there's no i mean for like six months after when ray finds was me and much what happens live quoting the whole thing i tied i was like do i love do i cry what do i do do i is this like an honor like it's ray five it is an honor it's an honor and it's like great television it was wrong human and we all vent that's the best way to get it all out and move on yeah that's why when i saw that my hot mic moment i was like fuck like now i'm glad it happens i think me and marita are in such a better place and like such a real authentic place and so that was good i mean like i i would never want to hurt her but like we got to like a really deep level a friendship because of that right and then like last season when i watch that scene with john like i at the reunion when i'm talking about it and i'm like no i cried for like three weeks and everyone's like you didn't seem that bad and i'm like no but i know my partner right yeah so yeah it was bad did you feel did you feel ghastlet by like the woman at the reunion yeah when they were telling me how i felt yeah yeah beyond i was like i that's why i was like i'm not saying i mean you guys can't hear everything i say so it's added down but i kept saying i'm not talking i'm not saying another word you guys are telling me how i feel i'm telling you what's real and you're telling me how i feel well we saw marita say to you you said what you needed to say you're good you don't need to keep fighting back against everyone yeah all of them yeah so it was wild wild i kind of miss when it was you maritith and heather though do you remember that you guys had that in my wrong didn't they have like a threesome well we were good for like a few months but i i just think it's like i think some no i don't i'm i'm totally good yeah yeah i'm totally good i know where i know how i'm friends with heather i know how i'm friends with everybody like i know like yeah okay you're ready to do that tell me what's wrong yeah just the pluses right in and they tell us what's wrong and we give them advice okay i love that and i think you'll give some really good advice i hope so i have fallen in love with my roommate and don't know what to do we're both gay and she knows i have feelings for her but says i would make things but says it would make things complicated how do i go about living with her do i keep pretending that everything she does is a sign or do i have to disassociate and neglect these feelings it's not a sign like everything she does is her just being kind it's not a sign you need to get a new roommate because this is painful for you yeah yeah this is so painful you have to move right get a new roommate i kind of agree it's like you said you're in love with her and there's no coming back from that no no she knows and she it's not reciprocated and it's only gonna hurt you yeah it's gonna it's and you know what it's a blessing into skies because that means it's not your person you'll find your person we all have to have one big heart break before we can find like the love of our life like for sure maybe even two big heart breaks so that you can really appreciate like the person you end up with i remember sitting on a nail salon in this girl was like trying to find a sign and everything with a sky to the point where i finally turned around i'm like he doesn't like you he's not calling you because he doesn't like you like you need to move on like i'm listening to the whole thing there's your friend is trying to be nice to you right now he does not like you right men that like girls or girls that like girls or guys that like guys show it yeah yeah if they like you back you're you'd be together yeah and you wouldn't have to question it and there's somebody amazing waiting for you that's gonna appreciate your love want to reciprocate your love and you're gonna be like thank god that didn't work out right yes it's always thank god that didn't work out thank god it didn't work out thank god for unanswered prayers right yes for sure my part of a country song yes i can't remember which one but i know it is i want to make like a nix and five rhyme with baby gorgeous oh let's do it like Lisa Barlow hive baby gorgeous vibe nix and five oh i love it right i just came up with that right now yeah i just go with that just yes Lisa Barlow hive baby gorgeous five nix and five yes are you next fan love the next our friend Jordan Clarkson plays for the next time obsessed with him he played for Utah he is such a good human being i love his whole entire family and great dad like love them and when he went to the next i was like if we were gonna lose you from the jazz to anyone thank god you at home right die hard nix fan die hard it would i mean being in the city for the next day yet sure it's who you are i cannot believe you were there i like literally you've had the best few weeks it was like Jake i know i know that's why you have haters but i had a great fucking time i loved watching you have a great time i had a great fucking time i live vicariously through you in europe and new york you deserve all of that thank you yeah when you're front row at the dior show i've never been to paris so i'm like log every fucking second of this trip right every fucking second okay i would be like an adior hi bitches yeah everything i yeah they're gonna hate either way so my boyfriend loves his mom almost to an overbearing degree weird done break up i just started to notice this and it's all fine for now but what if we're to get married and i'm his second favorite woman in his life like what they have a great relationship and their best friend so it's just weird for me when they spend more time together than with me i mean red flag all over the place i love my children more than my i would give them my organs you need my kidneys three years no weird yeah say goodbye goodbye yes just break up we're done we're done yeah my family misplaced my birth certificate like they just fucking lost it i needed it recently and my mom was like oh you know what where is that and it's just gone so i technically have no real proof of citizenship i looked it up and you can replace it but my real issue is how the fuck were they so careless with something so important like it feels like i'm invisible okay you're not invisible how many kids is your mom have maybe you're the only one you know what maybe my mom misplaced stuff on the regular on the regular and my mom literally when i was 17 gave me my social security card my birth certificate and said it's no longer my responsibility because if it's mine it's going to disappear right yes and she's an organized neat free in my my house smells like bleach when you walk into it so we're super clean super organized and she could barely keep track of my birth certificate you're not invisible that you're in your head about this everybody loves you you know what is so cool something good is gonna come from this like the journey to get your birth certificate is gonna open some other crazy drive that you're gonna be like oh thank god i lost my birth certificate right because stuff like that happens to me all day i'll be like where is my one goiard wallet and then i'll be looking for it and i'll find five other good things right yes this is like a little magic thing that's happening for you all my parents lose shit all the time for me like my dad forgets my birthday all the time my dad calls me my brothers name all the time like yeah i feel like we're in like this era where people are like helicopter parenting their kids hard and like they know where everything is and If I call my parents right now, it's at Worst Labor or Certificate, they'd be like, I don't know I don't know because I don't know when I would need that and you're very visible. Yes. Yes, you're everyone loves you, honey You're good. Well, you know what? If no one loves me at least Lisa Barlow loves me, and that's what's the most important I love love you. I love you more. Cheers. I Might love love my best friend from childhood and I used to talk every single day even after I moved away years and years ago We've completely drifted which happens. I got busy with college and my career and he stayed in the town He always said he always said he wanted to do that I've tried calling him a couple of times recently and he isn't picking up which is very unlike him I just learned through mutual friend recently that apparently he thinks I became this asshole New York State New York hot shot And I'm icing him out. How do I tell him I've just been busy? Will you pick up the phone and column or text him if he's not picking up I think you should write him a letter Like handwritten. Yeah, I handwrite a letter and just be like I miss you bitch or something like yeah for real Yeah, just write him a letter and I just think people It's probably his it sounds like it's his own insecurity. He's projecting because he stayed in the town You went out and did other things and like moved on and instead of being like Like I love this life for you enjoy that I like kept like you know stay true to what I wanted It's just a projection. Yeah, most things are you guys got a bump into each other. Yeah, I mean if you if the friendship is real It'll come back around. There's no way that friendship's not real. Yeah, when your friends that long You just you just have to see each other right. That's what I always say about me my best friend Julia fight all the And then you just need to see each other. We're fine. Yeah. Yeah, we love each other. Why were we mad? Right? Why were we like I we've literally scream cried that's why I'm like I love housewives so much. I'm like this in my life Hi Jake and special guest It feels like I'm the only one in my life who is trying to keep relationships alive when I stop trying or don't show Initiative the relationship dies and I the problem or just unlucky with friends. No, you're special I think that people that are so amazing usually have One to three friends. It's not you just keep vibing keeping you you're not the problem They're not meant for you. You're rejecting them energetically You know quality is better than quantity and you're not the problem. You just haven't found your people yet Yes, yes Enough said like the most special people have very small circles. I completely agree You don't have a big circle if you like to have the biggest fucking circle and I was so run ragged and I'm like I literally they were sucking you dry like I need my body was like yeah literally giving up on me. Yes My best friend and I have a lot of fun together, but she will randomly make negative comments about me Like bringing up my ex or things I am insecure about to people we hang out with not your friend, right? Yeah, bye I don't have a ton of friends so I don't know whether to drop her or not and it sucks because she's really fucking funny But it always uses me as the butt of the joke. Nope. Nope. Bye. Not your friend. Not your friend. Not your friend. Nope Yeah, I mean, there's like a million quotes. I could send that girl. Right, or I have a quote I have a quote above my bad my favorite quote many painted it for me. She's a painter. Yeah, she could I need one to know what she's a very talented. She painted a painting for my parents. Yeah Yeah, she's very talented It says um, but yeah, it's you need a quote and Lisa can send you quotes. Yes. What's a quote you would give her right now? Manny or this girl this girl. Oh, I was like one to paint or one to go You know, I think it's the thing about the eagle flying, you know like when you know The only way to take out an eagle. There's another bird that like what is it the crow will attach itself to the eagle and the eagle doesn't React it just flies higher and then the crow Like falls off, you know like just fly higher just keep being yourself like You know, don't worry about other people, but someone someone that's being passive aggressive to you under the guise of humor does not like you They're jealous of you. It's a trigger And I think that person needs to figure out what you trigger in them But you need to know that you are a trigger for this person because if you weren't they wouldn't be path being passive aggressive with nasty comments about you Right, I don't know what the quote is right now, but just keep flying higher and find your friends. Yeah, don't let the crow bring you down I had been best friends with this guy for four years We hung out all the time face time to every night and told each other everything but a few months ago Everything changed when he started dating this girl He would spend all of his time texting and calling her well that makes sense because they're dating Yes, and he didn't tell me that they were dating until I confronted him about it Oh, so you're in love with him now He ignores me doesn't tell me anything and I've turned into the evil girl best friend He's moved on. I think he has a new best friend Respectfully she was a little in love with him. They don't want to admit it and Right and you guys think no hundred percent. Yeah, I think you have a crush. You're Twitter pated by him and You're what Twitter pated like you know when you get those butterflies in your stomach. Oh, I love that word I really get Twitter pated. I love that Twitter pated feeling. I saw it with John But like I think she probably crushing hard. Yeah, move on move on. Yeah I'm bad at sex and it's becoming a real issue I was a little bit of a late bloomer, but I'm 25 and should maybe have a better handle on this During one night's standard hookups I never know what to say or what to do after and I'm just really uncordinated in general I have an active sex life too. So is it just like practice makes perfect? No No, practice is not make perfect. Wait, so what do you think she should do? I think you need to just find your person and get into a rhythm Okay, you need a better rhythm and you'll find it with your person But practice doesn't make perfect because then you're just having sex You're not having sex because you want to listen. I tell my kids is all the time Like not all the time, but like when we talk about like sex and stuff I'm like there is nothing better than having intimacy with your person when you love someone everything so much better like I'm Like I'm probably going to sound weird right now. I'm so anti-pornography. I've told my kids in saber little I told Jack pornography is bad. It'll ruin your brain. It's worse than drugs and it does and they guess he got older I'm like Jack you don't ever want to look at porn or get addicted to porn because you will never have great sex If you watch porn or anything and I think it's not about with this girl in her situation. It's not about quantity and like being like I need to be good at sex. You can't be great at sex with someone You're just meeting and practicing on like great sex comes from having a rhythm and being in love and like Feeling someone and knowing their body and appreciating their body and like the energy you guys have together That's like great like that's when you know your great at sex like you're not bad at this person is not bad You're not bad at sex right? You're not having you're having sex with the wrong people like save yourself For the right one and then it will just work. Yes. Yes. It'll just work. You get great advice. I hope so you should have like an advice Doctor Ruth. Yes No, but it's true though it works and like I think a lot of people put crazy pressures on themselves I'm like what is good sex like what is bad sex? If you're having drunk sex like it's probably it might be good for in the moment, then you might wake up and you hate it like but having that quality person and saving yourself for like someone where it's like that intense like euphoric like Twitter-pated amazing feeling is so much better than Rando's you're not gonna have good sex and you're gonna think you suck. But you don't suck. You do not suck. You just need to find your person. Yeah, it's impossible to suck it sex Really? Yeah, I think so. Okay. I think if you're into the person if it's like a stranger and you're like Don't care. I think it's like there's so many extraneous factors that I think when you and your person aren't together It's impossible to have bad sex love that when it's your person agreed. I haven't found my person yet, but I will okay I will. Do we like anybody? Crushing. I hope I want to find a Paris lover. You're just it's gonna be kiss Matt. Okay, please put it out there for me. Put it out there for me. Do you know what I told my friend Julia? She got married. We were at Chaconis like four years ago. Oh, that's what started in the world. Yeah, and she was like I'm never gonna find anyone I'm like I don't even know what's going on and she's so gorgeous. She's so smart and successful I go just talk openly to God all the way home. She was living in Santa Monica. I'm like tell God what you want She did the whole way home and I'm like just keep telling God every day until he gives you your person. She had her person It was like six weeks later. So she they're married. Yeah, it's put it out there Just all you have to do is keep saying I'm gonna find my person. I'm gonna find who I should be with in Paris. Yes, in Paris It's Paris, right? Yep, and yes, yes, we need a Parisian. I'm gonna text you updates. I'm gonna face time you with updates. Oh, I'm gonna face me Oh, my gosh, we don't go to the roof. We need to text more. I know send me video messages. I will I'll send you some video messages every day. Oh, you have to I love getting sometimes I get video messages from Lisa And I feel really special means that's how I send you messages. Yes, and once I'm many and I were watching Salt Lake And I was like I just call Lisa. Yeah, I mean, he was like no way and I was like swear I think she'll pick up and I did I did and then he was for me now. I will always pick up for you unless I'm in a position where I can't yes, I will always pick up Lisa What did we learn today? - That we love each other so much. - Yes, we do, and Baby Gorgeous is Loki a pride anthem. - Yeah it is, it's a pride anthem, it's an anthem for self. - Yeah. - And I think it's a mantra that everyone should live by, and that you're gonna be having the time. You are having the summer of your life. Do you realize this? - No, I don't, and I need to. - Wait, do you realize this? Like think about it, you were at the next game. - Right. - The most epic game of all time. - Of art like generation, you were there. A week before that, where were you? And it's super yacht in the Mediterranean. - Yeah. - Your life is good, we learned that your life is great and you deserve it all. - Thank you. - Yes, you deserve it all. - And you deserve it all. - Thank you. - I love you. - Bye, Pussies. (upbeat music) (upbeat music)