Scott Hanson, NFL Week 1 Picks And Preview, Drake Maye's Terrible 4th Quarter, 49ers Beat The Timezones Plus Fyre Fest Of The Week

hey pardon my take listeners you can find every episode on apple podcasts and spotify prime members can listen ad free on amazon music on game day get sub stacked high at jersey mics like the number 13 original italian loaded with meats cheese and toppings or the number 56 big kahuna cheese steak with grilled steak peppers onions and mushrooms topped with jalapenos and melty cheese get your sub fix on game day and order in store or the jersey mics app on today's part of my take presented by draft kings football is back and the 2026 nfl season is off and running we're going to talk about wednesday night's game drake may's horrendous fourth quarter seahawks one and oh the rams and niners in australia the niners beat time and demolished the game the rams we also have scott hansen on the show brings the energy to get you excited for week one of the nfl season we do all of our picks in preview we have fire fest of the week and on top of all of that new sponsor alert new sponsor alert kings 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kings hawaiian they're the perfect football food go visit right now kings hawaiian.com okay let's go welcome to part of my take presented by draft kings the crown is yours today is friday september 11th and football is back so back probably the last time we'll say that no we're gonna say it on monday no but monday will be boomers and we're then we're gonna say football is back yeah true true true true yeah football's back back we have our week one preview coming uh every single game scott hansen fire fest a great i i actually was while we were taping this show because we taped a lot of it earlier in the day i was smiling because i was just getting to talk ball with with my best boys it's so good like we're you know we've been doing it for the last month or so but it's mostly just been using our imagination correct it's like i wonder what the season's going to look like max why is jill and hertz not throwing enough picks you know like that sort of stuff now it's like we got actual shit to talk about right like drake may throwing three fourth quarter interceptions and maybe the worst throw of his career that you you said that yeah worst game of his career worst throw of his career hank you seem like you almost can't football season on wednesday night that's what it felt like uh it sucks playing the first game of the year and then having that you know be the end result obviously this is a sunday at one o'clock game it it doesn't get talked about as much as it has in the past 24 hours but rightfully so it was it was uh it was a horrific loss yeah there's no there's no there's no two ways about it yeah i've got some stats if you want to buy the numbers i got stats too okay oh okay oh you go first let's you want to go set for set yeah all right we'll be the rest of us will be the judge on who wins the staff or stat go for it who's going up first now you go first who's got a coin flip a coin to see who has to go for all means hank you go first all right here comes max he's flipping a lucy i got a lucy all right flip it the heads up top yeah we understand what heads and tails are for that all right who's calling it hank heads heads it is so are you deferring first yeah for the second half yep okay okay so i'm defending i'll take this this side all right here we go uh stat number one every pass that drake may has thrown over 15 yards this season has been intercepted whoa that can't be true three of them yeah wow okay hey the last five quarterbacks to throw three interceptions in the season opener matthew stafford 2022 joe burrow 2022 josh allen 2023 drake it's a good good group to be in it's a good thing so none of those guys went to the super bowl that year you're not in this well no we're judging we're judging i'm just pft wins that stat yeah pft one round yeah i mean well no but that was that's just in a row yeah that's that also you guys who didn't go to the goals i was like the best quarterbacks in the league yeah but those guys didn't go to the super bowl that year and they didn't win the mvp that year you sure about that yeah i mean joe burrow's never won an mvp matthew stafford's first mvp was last year i remember josh allen's mvp wait was that 2024 that was the 2023 new orleans super bowl it says the eagles that's it's 2024 okay so but not super bowl so mvp max all right uh tie whoa i still say so that 2022 season was after they won the super bowl went to the super no i know i know that's what i'm saying yeah they didn't go to the super bowl that year okay next stat that just shows you no and you can't interrupt and that was matt stafford did jump off sides there matt stafford and joe burrow both did it the only reason it didn't happen at donald's because he got hurt but that just shows you that's just that you get to the super bowl it's kind of a rite of passage you throw three picks you're saying sam donald if he had played the whole game would have got thrown three yeah without a doubt well not it happened it's just a super bowl stat you wouldn't know okay okay how many times did tom brady do that he's spicy i like i got tom brady stats keep it um by the way you can't jump off side by the way i'm at this point max you award a touchdown max uh and and zach uh let's judge this boxing rules you know i mean like i like 10-9 one of them we'll tabulate after okay that was round one okay of the last 22 patriots opponents 11 have fired their head coach 12 have played a quarterback who is back up or benched only five out of the patriots last 22 games have not been against a bench quarterback or a fired head coach whoa say that again it's a lot of words of the patriots last 22 opponents okay 11 have fired their head coach and 12 in that game played a quarterback who was either a backup or a quarterback who had been benched who returned got it okay so only five of the patriots last 22 games were not against either a coach who was about to be fired because the team was so bad uh or a backup quarterback that was from scott casmar okay tom brady year three week one had four interceptions in the first game and got benched okay okay so so to answer your tom brady's bench drake may is that what you're saying no i'm just saying like these things i'm judging these i'm here to bench drake no it just means that one bad game the first first first week of the season okay but you're saying that like maybe if you you bench tom brady and he got better how did you play in the last game that he played the seahawks defense is phenomenal don't worry don't worry let's not yeah hold on i'm i listen i'm i'm grading these uh rounds that was round two so we're gonna unveil the card at the end yeah yeah you gotta unveil the card at the end round three uh drake may is the first quarterback in nfl history to play two opponents back to back and have the best fourth quarter of his career in the first game and the worst fourth quarter of his career in the second game oh and then what happened in both those games he okay okay uh josh allen in 2023 week one had three interceptions against the jets and lost the game wasn't this you already did that stat nope what year was that 2023 well yeah wait josh allen has still three interceptions twice in the week one different stat wait when did josh allen throw three interceptions well one one was a collective stat about the quarterback no no no but i need to know when josh allen well the loss of the game was an add-on add-on wait but you double dipped on the same stat and also you might have screwed up my point of not winning the mvp that year because that you're now you're saying it was 2023 i said that the first time you said it's 2024 no i didn't it was opening night 9 11 11, Aaron Rodgers, Torres, Achilles. Did he not say 2024 last time? Nope. To start the show? I have a stat. Okay, so Josh Allen did not win an MVP the year that he threw three interceptions to open the season. Okay. Okay, halftime show. Okay, Max, your stat. I only have one more stat. Can I do the halftime show stat? Yeah. I'm done with this. It's bad ball. Why? All right, so that's a TKO for PFT. I can keep going. In the last two games, he has thrown more interceptions than Jalen Hurts threw in the 2024 season. Okay, all right. And one less interception than he threw last year. Now we're good. All right, what was your last stat? A lot of Patriots fans were liking to talk about A.J. Brown finally getting a good quarterback. This isn't about the Eagles. Not everything's about the birds, Max. That's fucked up, dude. He's hurt. You just liver-shotted Hank. He's out, body shots. What was your last one? It's been five years since we've seen as bad of an interception situationally as Drake May threw on that last pick. Wow. Down by three, less than a minute left inside of the 20-yard line. Last time we saw a pick that bad, Kyler Murray, week eight, 2021, which was, I do believe, a Modern Warfare double XP weekend. Mm-hmm. So, Hank, first of all, you lost that stat off. Mm-hmm. You gave up. Mm-hmm. You didn't come out for round four. It was a – everyone's boxing was rigged. I had you 10-9 in round two. Drake May's last five games. Right here. Right here. Seven touchdowns, 11 turnovers. Seven picks, four fumbles lost. 24 sacks. 143 yards lost on sacks. Six yards per attempt. Five and a half net yards per attempt. I mean, now he's just being mean. He's cut. He's bloody. I mean, Drake May, Josh McDaniels, it was horrible play calling the entire night. It was super conservative. It was tough to watch, even before they gave up the lead and before the interceptions. That was like – And the sacks are an offensive line stat. Yeah, as much as it's a Drake May stat. If I were Joe Rogan going to the center of the ring, I'd just put the microphone in PFT's face. He'd just hit me with another stat. Mm-hmm. He's like, shout out this last stat. I can do another one. Okay. Okay, Will Campbell, shortest arms in the NFL for an offensive tackle. Drake May, smallest hands. Bad combination. Combination! I think you went one too far on the stats. That one wasn't – that was more editorializing. That wasn't so much a stat. The last one before, it was really good. Yeah. Hank, it's week one. It's week one. Yeah, exactly. Like, A.J. Brown injuries suck. Sam Darnold injuries sucks. Drew Locke, by the way, we should give him a little bit of credit. Like, that did – it felt like the Patriots thought they were going to win that game with 10 points when Drew Locke came in. And they played that way. They were very conservative. It felt like the end of first half. It just is like – but you can never – the Seahawks defense is so fucking good. They'll always keep a team – their team in the game. Yeah, and this is actually like a legit stat credit to the Seahawks defense. Like, Ramondre Stevenson, he had 50 yards after contact. He had one yard before contact. Damn. So, they were hitting him as soon as he got the ball in his hand. Yeah, they fly around. They're everywhere. They made the big plays. That interception by Jobe getting his feet down, I know it was a bad throw, but it was also like a very impressive interception. That is the Patriot way. Do your Jobe. Yeah. JSN. Like, that – JSN is everything you want in a number one receiver and the fact that he could be – he could be – he could be – he could be a number one receiver. Quiet for a while and then just one catch and he changes the game. Yeah. Like, that's – that's the type of special player he is where he just outruns everyone. They need – Why'd you take off your headphones? Just – Just relax. You don't like what Max is going to say? He didn't say anything. I didn't say anything. He wasn't even looking at you. Hank, it's week one, dude. You got the green dot, Hank. You have to keep the headset on. It's week one. Yeah, it's week one. It's week one. Stuff happens. This was a world-class defense. The crowd – The crowd was fired up. It was – it was banner night. Like, the eyes of the world were upon you. Everybody has a bad game sometimes. It gets better. I talked to Drake Maylover after the game. I was like, what's the spin? We employ him for anyone who doesn't know. Well, yeah. What's the party line here? I need to know what we're saying. It's kind of similar to what Hank said. Like, this is Josh McDaniel's fault. Terrible. Terrible game plan. Terrible. Yeah, Drake Maylover last night after said, blitz me, I don't care. And just was like, give me everything. Yeah. Hank, you tweeted after complete disaster, we might be in for a long season. It's week one. This wasn't a game. Did you think – I mean – Going into this game, did you think you were going to win? Like, obviously, you get pumped up for it. But, like, when you look at the schedule, you're like, that's the Seahawks. That's the – you're playing in Seattle, banner night, the best defense in the league. You had to expect that it was going to be a very tough game. If you were looking at my personal brain win probability chart, it was under 50% to start the game. Sam Darnold went out, and it went up to, like, 90%. You didn't believe in Drew Locke. I didn't believe in Drew Locke. Drew Locke threw some darts. Drew Locke is the rare backup quarterback that is a true gunslinger. You get, like, long-term backup quarterbacks that are more the game manager type, and they stick around a long time, and they coast, and God bless them. There's a reason why most backups kind of fit that role. Drew Locke is the rare guy that will go in, and he'll put a few balls up to be intercepted, but he'll throw the fuck out of a couple corner flags. Yeah, like, I love Drew Locke for that. I love Drew Locke for that, because when you see a backup quarterback come in, and they just take checkdowns, and they're really safe, it can drive you insane. It's funny that Drew Locke is on the Seahawks, because it's actually a bad pairing. Yeah. Like, the one thing, like, if you don't make mistakes with that Seahawks defense, you're going to probably win. He didn't make a mistake, so I guess that's credit to Drew Locke. I mean, he had a couple balls that probably could have been picked off. Yeah. But that's what you're going to get with Drew Locke. He's going to take some shots. That's it. Like, the Seahawks defense is so dominant that it's like, just don't give the other team short. Short fields with bad turnovers, and they'll keep you in the game and give you a chance. Yeah, so the Sam Darnold situation, not great. I guess it could have been a lot worse. People were thinking maybe it was a broken hip. It doesn't look like it was broken. He's getting all the tests done. You've got to be careful with Sam Darnold, I would say. Like, you don't need to rush him back. They've got a brutal schedule picking up in the second half in October. So, you know, get him 100%, then bring him back. And, Hank, you know what? I got you. I got your back. I'm going to avenge this loss for you. Week three. I got you. All right? Thanks. Yeah, you're welcome. That's huge. Yeah. Good guy. Hank, what was going through your head when Drake May was throwing picks in the fourth quarter while Stu Feiner was sitting next to you watching promos of himself? I had to plug my ears, like, for the last, like, probably 10 minutes because Stu was just not even watching the game, talking about God knows what. And the game was falling apart. Yeah. He was going on a riff about how Drake May was throwing picks. Drake May has half a man's tongue. Yeah. I think he's got a normal tongue. Yeah, I think it was a bad angle on the tongue. Yeah, but that's never going to get out of my head now. No. Whenever I see the tongue. I'm always going to be like, yeah, you can't win with half a man's tongue. Tiny tongue. How are you going to do that? Can't do it. All right, so are you feeling better today? No. Oh, worse? Yeah. Oh, why? So AJ Brown's out for, what, at least four weeks? Four to six. High ankle sprain? That was tough. Romeo Dobbs. Brule drop. Was nowhere to be found really all game. Again, that might have more to do with McDaniels, but he had a wide open catch first down. Just dropped it. Yeah. What do you think Eagles fans are thinking watching AJ Brown? Do we know any Eagles fans? Yeah, let's get on the phone with one. Okay. Too small of a sample size. I mean, he had 27 yards in the first half, but it's only a half a football. Do you think, now you know AJ a lot better than Hank does. The underthrow on the flea flicker was horrendous. Okay, so what do you think AJ was thinking before he got hurt? Too early to tell. I don't think that's what you were saying last night, Max. I didn't say anything last night. To the underthrow. I don't want to hear. No, I saw Nate Tice, who I mean, he's a friend of the program, guest of the show, recurring guest. He did, and Nate Tice is one of those guys. Everything he says, I'm like, he just made me smarter about football. He wasn't excusing the underthrow, but he said, a flea flicker like that is so dependent on perfect timing, and it looked like Ramondre Stevenson pitched it late to Drake May. So all the timing was off. Yeah. I mean, I'm just telling you what he said. I'm just telling you what he said. That sounds like an excuse. Okay. Okay, we won't make it. Hey, I didn't say. You got it. You got it. That guy. Good thing I didn't make the excuse. Nate Tice did. I think you got to hit that guy, but the pitch back was late. Nate Tice made that excuse. Take it up with Nate Tice. He's going to be like, why did you? There'll be people tagging him being like, they fucking name checked you. We love Nate. We're going to have him back on this year. Every now and again, we get reminded. We've had, I think, a pretty successful podcast the last 10 years. We like to think that we know what we're doing, but we get reminded that we're not on the Mount Rushmore. And last night, that hit me right between the eyes. Skip Bayless tweeted out Drake, maybe. Yeah. And I was like, God damn. He stole that from Cousin Sal, actually. No, no. Skip did that all the way back in Drake May's rookie year. Oh, okay. Yeah. So there is a big back and forth. Who's got the IP to Drake? A big battle on the internet. I did look deeper into that than I'm proud to say. And it does appear that Skip Bayless was first. He was the first? I think they came up with it independently. That would be very funny if that was a missed type. and autocorrect yeah he's like fuck i gotta go with it drake maybe is just a just a banger of a nickname unfortunately what do you think hank skip yeah skip do you you respect skip i respect skip yeah he's good at what he does troll um the the men's health article that came out i thought was actually pretty cool drake may does seem like a good guy he he drinks what like five pina coladas a year yeah that so he yeah five pina coladas doesn't drink beer doesn't drink alcohol i uh as much as you want to like be like what a loser he's an nfl starting quarterback and i think if you told anyone in the world like hey don't drink any beer you'd be an nfl not obviously that's not why he's nfl starting quarterback but he's clearly doing something right he also said it's because his dad like he grew up he's like never really saw his dad drink his older brother doesn't drink so he's like yeah i was just following you know yeah yeah my role in the nfl and he's like yeah i was just following you know my role in the nfl and he's and shout out pina colada i was saying i'm a daiquiri guy but getting getting like pool or beach drunk on just daiquiris or pina coladas is a top tier experience can't do it every day i do it maybe once a year but it is a great i did it at max's bachelor party just got fucked up on some strawberry daiquiris yeah you get the mix you get the miami vice going yeah that's just being like you know what i'm gonna have five of these while i'm at the pool and then i'm gonna get out of the pool i'm not gonna be able to walk it's the worst the worst too oh terrible terrible but in the moment it's the best vibes you have a really good time drinking them you're basically drinking candy and you can't you can't be upset if you've got a pina colada glass that's got like maybe the orange slice on it yeah and the garnish like you can't be upset while you're drinking that you're just having a good time um so yeah i got no problem with him not drinking alcohol it has worked out really well for him um but i would like my quarterback to have a thirst for champagne that's the difference good point maybe add that to the hank prediction on the uh by the way we should have mentioned this uh we did a group bet before the season where we took all of our teams uh win total overs we adjusted some of them so i think it ended up i'll pull it up it's uh it's all of our teams plus the chargers for shane and it's a group bet that we're gonna split i think we put we put a decent amount on it uh with draft kings it was let's see bears over seven and a half so we we we toggled a couple of them down bears over seven and a half uh chargers over eight and a half bucks over six and a half commanders over six and a half patriots over eight and a half eagles over eight and a half jets over four and a half we thought it'd be a fun thing we're gonna get a big board track it someone is probably gonna screw the bet for everyone else hank you immediately afterwards were wrote in the group chat like this bet like this stinks you're like that was that it's over what was the exact thing you said this bet is dead this bet is dead yeah it's not dead what do you think the patriots record is gonna be i don't know why are you this down about it did you watch the game like what the fuck they're talking the seahawks are super bowl champions okay that's just a fact a bonus point for that fact good stat i think it's fair to be like i don't know how you walk away from that game and like yeah we can win 10 games well you're not gonna play the seahawks every week i think the bigger question would be what it was seahawks with drew lock it was seahawks but the defense i'm saying you're saying that like drew lock is a pile of shit you just see it yeah that wasn't the seahawks seahawks drew lock do you have any existential questions right now about drake may because it was no the playoffs weren't great and then playoffs were going to the super bowl no no but his play i'm saying i can read back the stat of his last five games if you want i'm good he's okay josh mcdaniel's yeah i what i was gonna try to come around to is like i don't think you should the seahawks are an incredible defense i know yeah so don't be so down right max is being kind of i mean i'm not down on drake may of the team like again like i don't know it's week one week one is the week one but i mean the seahawks that's a terrible loss it's a terrible yeah i mean yeah three interceptions like but you keep saying like you keep yeah you keep saying like oh it's a seahawks seahawks you're winning the game you're winning the game you're winning the game you're winning the game against drew lock you let drew lock come back and win that football game terrible loss week one is really what you should be saying right now right not seahawks seahawks well you guys are so fucking annoying it's like oh like fast forward uh preview for like 10 minutes like week one we're not gonna overreact we're totally gonna yeah we do say that just said it's week one and it's also very much you just you just agreed with what i just said no but like you said there you go you go week one let's say we're not gonna wreck but we're totally gonna overreact and then it's like i'm overreacting guys like whoa like what how could you just overreact it's like you think yeah yeah not for sure but this is this is your friends telling you not to overreact yeah we're trying to be good friends yeah okay thanks guys so we're saying that you're welcome this is why you're in that seat you're overreacting this is why having standalone games is the absolute worst yeah it's the worst yeah you the world doesn't need to have an opinion on your favorite team yeah after week one yeah i'm ready to just watch more football this weekend and then and then we'll worry about this remember the vikings uh bears game monday night last year i was fucking down in the dumps yeah question for him yeah pft uh henry oh you're fucking dead naming henry uh next week against the steelers is that a must-win game no okay okay start off on two if you lose that is jaguars that jaguars a must-win game yeah okay there's some bad stats though like you don't want to i think steelers is most one i think uh oh october 18th there's 12 o'clock noon game jets at patriots is that a must-win game yep that's gotta be a must-win yeah all right yeah we need we need nine you it's time to lock in all right the other game the 49ers i mean we not we are not smart people no one's listening to this show for uh football acumen but sometimes we are smart and repeatedly saying it makes no sense what the rams are planning on doing flying in the day before and the 49ers have been there for a week and a half turns out to be exactly correct because the rams looked awful super team they looked so bad pooper team pooper team stafford looked off and credit to the niners the niners like their blocking scheme was was awesome to to deal with the rams front they uh brock purdy yeah he had one doy doy play but other than that like he looked like great he looked like great he looked like great brock purdy where he was you know extending plays in the pocket making you know big time throws the the touchdown pass to to demarcus robinson yeah the niners are the niners are good team like i don't know we probably didn't give them enough uh love going into the season just because they time and time and again they have the top end talent it's like can they stay healthy they had a couple more injuries tonight shriveling i think is out uh that looked like an achilles but super team super team off to a bad start turns out maybe you should have done that you should have done that try to beat time so here here's the thing um it was a terrible idea that sean mcfay tried to do but i i have to respect how much of an all-time fuck it move it was yeah to just pretend that time zones don't exist correct he was just like you know what fuck it we're not gonna we're not gonna adapt we're gonna fly in fly out fuck it not not only to pretend the time zones don't exist but to pretend that a 15-hour flight has no effect on a body no effect whatsoever like i take a three-hour flight and i'm i'm not gonna fly in i'm not gonna fly out i'm not gonna fly out i'm not gonna i'm like i feel like shit they 15-hour flight and you play a football game less than a day and a half later 15-hour flight with no wi-fi is that true there's no wi-fi on that jet yeah did they do that on purpose so people would sleep i think it that you had to do a trade-off and the jet that they got is like the most comfortable that's yeah they had all the lay flat ones but that particular model of plane does not have wi-fi also i have a question because i know lay flat like i'm a larger man but i'm not an nfl football player i barely fit in the lay flats how did any of these guys fit in a late like how did an offensive lineman fit in a lay flat maybe just a like a blow-up mattress that you put in the aisle yeah i guess i don't know but yeah no that's a fair point because i mean i gotta be honest the lay flats i fit perfectly yeah that's like you're snug as a bug a hundred percent like a glove yeah no i'm when i do the lay flat it's like either my head is touching the wall or my feet are like you know bent yeah i can't do both i can't imagine that matt stafford who had to like sleep in a med bed outside the ramps facility and training camp last year yeah he could have loved that he probably didn't enjoy the old back probably didn't enjoy that but yeah terrible idea by sean mcveigh we we knew it because i guess we're not that stupid where we can figure out yeah you probably should try to acclimate a little bit that said i think it's it's going to be better for them on the back end than it is for the niners who right now will have to fly back and then get re-acclimated to united states time yeah i don't think the rams are going to have to do that so i think it's going to be better for them on the back end than it is for the yeah you kind of like trade one for the other but this was uh it was kind of a no doubter the niners looked much much better their run game is always going to be awesome it was awesome and the uh the the dump offs to mccaffrey the short passing game was great debo looked fast as shit he did and physical um it was great seeing kittle out there yes that first hit that he took you could see like some relief when he got hit the first time and he bounced back up he was like okay i'm back in it now yeah um it's kind of crazy that uh george kittle by the way and we're obviously very biased we love him to death but he it's crazy he tore his achilles and he missed Four quarters of football He tore his Achilles in January He missed one game Yeah Because they He won game He missed the game against the Seahawks Yeah It's fucking nuts Give the substation some credit Yeah Maybe it's not all bad He's just an absolute beast But yeah There was a couple injuries in this game In Australia tonight And there's got to be no worse feeling in the world Than having to fly back 15 hours With like a torn Achilles Shoot me like a horse That would be Like I'm not coming back Boys aren't coming back Unless they give you Like you get the good stuff Before you get on the plane Yeah Then you fall asleep But still They usually don't let you fly If you've got Like a Recently broken bone Right If you're swelling up They won't let you do it Now So that's got That's by far the worst flight home I would say would be Landman Who looked like he He fucked up his forearm Yeah I got a question for you PFT Are we going to If the 49ers lose week two And the Rams win Are we going to say the Rams Maybe got it right Because that was part of it Yeah That it's going to be hard For the 49ers To adjust back The Rams will be able To get right back in there Because they never Changed time zones The Rams Or the 49ers also Do get to play the Dolphins And then I think The Rams Have the Cardinals No they have the Giants The Giants The 49ers have Dolphins And Cardinals So the 49ers Should be A 3-0 team They could be I think it's really Going to fuck with them Going back But they have But they have some time They got a little bit of time To recuperate And maybe more time Because they're playing the Dolphins I think that's That's probably more likely What this case was And that's Sean McVay saying One game I'm not This is one game It's a stupid expansion thing But it's not It's one game But it's a divisional game It does count It's pretty fucking important It does count So Especially when you have A division that You know Last year came down to All three teams Were in it Until the last Two weeks of the season Right? Right That's not A divisional game Isn't nothing I don't think that Stafford looked great tonight In fact I think he looked pretty bad For most of the game Yeah I am willing to Chalk a lot of that up To the 15 hours on a plane Yeah Yeah But super team That status My ass Super team my ass Maybe on hold a little bit Miles Garrett Absent This game I don't think he even played Much of the second half at all Yeah Kilometers Garrett As they call him in Australia Aaron Donald Smartest guy ever Yep Coming back There was a guy On the Niners That got cut After he made it To Australia Or I guess Maybe moved to the Practice squad Okay Yeah Yeah but that That's fine Because the Niners Were there for so long Like I saw guys In track suits On the Niners Sideline And at first I was like Why the fuck Are they there And then I remembered Oh they've been there For a week and a half Rams That would be devastating That would be pretty bad Yeah Yeah They should have Actually brought Like If the Rams were smart They should have brought A coach they were Planning on firing anyway That would have rocked And just been like You know Just leave them over there I also would like to talk To you Because like Schrager I think Said this You know The Rams sent A couple scouts Over the summer To like test run this I've got the The exact quote right here I would like to talk To these people Yeah Two years Yeah he said Two years This isn't some Trial and error approach They've sent 15 staffers Over the last two years And have tracked their bodies And sleep rhythms That's That's an insane pun Oh yeah Oh shit Yeah You thinking What I'm thinking Yeah Oh my god I couldn't even Get the P word Out of my mouth Punishment You wouldn't do that I mean If we all agreed to So what would it be You get to fly To Australia And you get to stay there For one day You do the Rams trip You do the Rams trip No Wi-Fi on the plane Oh I think we'd have to do Wi-Fi on the plane So we'd have to like Update I don't know Would we Or first bus They left Tuesday They left Tuesday And they They're getting back Back when I don't know Like I'm thinking about episodes Although it would be funny If you had to do the episode From Australia Or from the plane No yeah From Australia The one day you were in Australia Yeah I mean No It would be Leave Thursday It would be Leave Thursday Come back Sunday Yeah I do Leave Thursday I don't know how Let's not get into the times Yeah we can't do that right now But let's put it on the table And we can discuss later I think that It was also I felt like I was feeling Some of the Rams Pain Because We watched at night here And that game was so God damn bright Yeah That was the brightest sun That I've seen In the NFL game In a long time I felt like I got jet lagged Just from watching the game Yeah It was weird It was also I saw 57 degrees I was like Man That's good That's good shit We're about to have that Yeah It's fall day Do we have to have concerts At every standalone game now Is that a rule Yeah I think so We also flag cucked them Ours was just a little bit Bigger It was bigger And I liked it The people in the stands Were wearing like They all got into the shape Of their American flag For a little bit Yeah It was kind of cool And also that stadium Was just the worst stadium Ever for football Yeah We were so far away So far away Yeah the cricket ground Yeah If you're If you're in the first level You just can't see anything Mm-hmm So good job Roger Thanks so much We grew the game today A little bit Yeah we did Seventh Seventh biggest game In NFL history What Yeah Seventh most people In attendance Oh wow In NFL history Okay Let's go We did it Now if you're gonna have a game In Australia I feel like this is This was the opportunity For ACDC to play halftime Mm-hmm Agreed History made Football's back boys A hundred thousand people Before we get into our week One picks and previews We're gonna go through every game Barry Melrose We should mention Legend of the game Passed away Very sad He was the face of hockey He was the face of hockey Like Yeah Through and through For a long time Just the swaggiest Coolest guy You see on TV Seemed like everyone You know the stories That come out He seemed like the best guy There were years Where ESPN had Had no Business or broadcasting Interest in hockey Whatsoever Yeah And they would still bring Barry on To talk a little puck Because He was that captivating Seems like a great guy Never got a chance To meet him But yeah Mount Rushmore Of TV Mullet For sure Absolutely And yeah Just an all-time All-time hockey guy So it's very sad I feel like He was He was hockey To a lot of people Growing up In the United States That didn't necessarily Come from a hockey town Yeah Yeah Alright Should we Get to our week Week one Picks and preview And then we have Scott Hansen Let's do it Let's do it Okay before we get to Picks and preview For week one DraftKings The wait is over Football's here And so is DraftKings The DraftKings 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Zach, did you put these out? Can't go wrong With the combo right there Thank you so much These are I Like, these are the perfect Uh Candy Snack Everything Right here In this In this sleeve Right here Reese's and Oreos It's so, so good When they decided to do this I actually Like I actually was bummed When they When they made it Because it's like What else is there in life? This is it This is the pinnacle They reached the pinnacle With the Reese's Oreos combo But Reese's Is the 1-1 pick Uh For everyone's Mount Rushmore We're doing picks in preview It's our 1-1 pick For week one We're gonna have Reese's Everywhere It is the Seattle Seahawks Of candy That's a fact Great offense Great defense Yeah And you know what? Even if you can't get that Uh The Reese's Oreo The backup's not bad either Yes Have to go with the regular Yes So Reese's The official candy partner Of Barstool Sports Go get Reese's Wherever you shop Alright boys It is Week one In the NFL We're gonna have a full slate on Sunday I'm so excited Uh How's everyone feeling? We're gonna go So we're gonna go through every game We're gonna do our picks We'll have to figure out a punishment Two picks each How's everyone feeling? I'm feeling really good It's the best time of year This is bar none The best time of year Everything's possible Everything's on the table You have the highest expectations For your guys Your team could go undefeated Yeah Except for Hank. But theoretically, most people's teams could go undefeated not you or max well no they can't both tie you could tie yeah true good point yeah you could tie checkmate you get a point for a tie i think jake marsh actually had his time oh okay yeah okay max honestly i'll offer you a draw if you want it i will not i will not take that all right uh by the way pft thank you for the gift you got me you're welcome i will be wearing it on sunday you're welcome i went um i was uh i've mentioned this before but sometimes early in the morning if you catch me if somebody sends me a product or something comes across like a targeted ad if it's before i get out of bed i am uh extremely impulsive with my purchases early in the morning so i got you the uh the uh caleb and ben johnson t-shirt and then i got uh hank the patriot stone cold steve austin jersey um the caleb and ben johnson by the way is like a weird mashup where it's ben johnson giving the finger so i think that's the dick a finger but then caleb smoking a cigarette which is the cutler cigarette yeah yeah it's all over it's kind of just like there's a little it's almost like a taylor swift song where there's easter eggs to bears past yeah it's it's all over the place so you know just a little something to get the boys back into the the nfl spirit i'm very much looking forward to on sunday morning the text hopefully we get it again from from boom oh yeah that you which is just basically wishing us a happy nfl season yeah and that's uh that's one of the highlights of my year but i'm i'm so excited i'm so excited we gotta we gotta figure out the the tv we'll get we're gonna go through every game where where the games are gonna be should we give ourselves a little warning and i'm not going to listen to my own warning but don't overreact to week one i don't agree to that yeah no i don't either i'm just telling me as right now we're sitting here it's thursday uh morning come sunday night when we're recording this show i will absolutely overreact but if if if anyone wants to like you know heed my advice from uh past me i was looking at it last year week one um we had the patriots lose to the raiders the raiders went on to be the worst team in the league yeah and the patriots went to the super bowl maybe that'll happen to the seahawks this year and then the patriots go right back yeah don't overreact how about uh do you guys remember there was a shootout in the meadowlands the jets and the steelers played in a shootout and we thought oh my god 34 32 that was one of the most exciting games we watched week one we're like justin fields aaron rogers this is going to be these teams are going to be awesome to watch yeah that didn't turn out to be uh the case it was a sliding doors moment that was uh memes could have had an awesome season last year if they won that game yeah and then uh on that monday night game week one so this is why i'm really bringing it up because it's it's it's a message to myself jj mccarthy beat caleb williams and it looked like jj mccarthy was going to be the the vikings future and uh now he's qb3 for the vikings correction uh jj mccarthy lost the first three quarters against the bears nine beat the bears in the fourth quarter but the point is uh week one there will be some weird shit that happens week one we'll look back and be like wow that was that was fucking bizarre if you were to draw it up on a map how would you plan out where your team would play in week one because i think i think the correct answer is right down the dick of sunday 12 o'clock 1 p.m games i got it yeah but the bears have it this year yeah bears at panthers yeah noon game yeah just buried in couldn't couldn't ask for a better nestle in there it's kind of like you're in a cozy spot it's like a nice warm blanket of all the other games wrapped around like in terms of the national uh audience the bears are somewhere between like the third and fifth most exciting game and that's in that window i would not want to be so perfect i would not want to be first i wouldn't want to be i wouldn't want to be first i wouldn't be last yeah you don't want the monday night game that's that's tough too you also don't want like the bills and texans that noon game like they're they are the premier noon game yep you don't want to be uh sunday night either because then you're surrounded by a bunch of people that have just won potentially and then now all eyes on you and the story is you yeah the story is you at that point for an entire monday uh i think i think game of the week sunday afternoon not great not a great spot to be but it could be worse yeah not great i think you want a noon you want you want a nude against a team that you have no like you you i want yeah that's exactly you have bears like enough to get like a little bit excited because like you know the panthers were in the playoffs last year kind of so like i'm worried about this game i think the panthers are going to be like a decent team i'm not saying that the bears are going to win this game but it's not i don't know any panthers fans in my life i don't like there's no they're not in the division now mix that's true and the the guy uh who sings who's fucking awesome if i had him oh yeah yeah that guy yeah uh steph curry yep best basketball player ever from akron that is true i actually did meet him remember at tahoe when marty fish was like hey this is big cat and he was like oh what's up and then he just walked away yeah so i don't know what to do with him i don't know what to do with him i don't know what to do with him so i i do know steph curry your friend you're a good friend yeah yeah just a kid from akron yeah uh okay uh one last thing before we get to the games i have uh each team's week one record since 2000 do you guys want to guess who's number one and who's dead last best week one team in the nfl since 2000 i could i could maybe make a better guess if it was since 2020 um but i'll just go with those same teams that i would have guessed in the last six or so years i'll say the fluffy eagles they are number one all right 18 and 8 let's go max ringling patriots are 17 and 9 i actually don't know if it's been updated since last night so they might be 17 and 10 okay all right good to know and then oh that's right they lost yeah um for the worst this one should be in week one i'm gonna guess the bengals no the cleveland browns oh three and 22 and one fucking joke that's crazy they've won joke of a city three times in week one since 2000 that's crazy and they keep going back god bless them i love i love browns fans by the way we should give a little context here hank is a little extra salty we obviously already talked about the patriots game but he did text this morning being like i'm injured i'm not coming in uh because the patriots lost and my assistant dom who is a diehard cleveland all ohio cleveland sports fan uh replied which is very uncharacteristic of him replied to the entire group chat text with the rock gif saying shut up bitch yeah yeah very out of character for don he doesn't talk in there often but i don't think that there's been a more liked message in the group oh it was great like instantly everybody just slammed it dom's been feeling himself a little bit recently well it's because they haven't the browns haven't had to play a game yet that's it it's they got lebron this is last week oh no fuck oh i saw him he went up to max the other day and he he berated max he told max to lock in because max didn't know the sixers preseason schedule oh he was like if you're going to take if if i'm giving you lebron if you're now in charge and he's yours i need you to take better care of him and to know the preseason schedule max he was really mad he was like that's going to be the first time and he's right he is right take care of his boy it's going to be the first time you see lebron in a sixers uniform you gotta be locked in on the preseason yeah oh man i was like i didn't say whatever yeah but yeah so shut up bitch shut up bitch yeah yeah listen i mean i i like this is also yesterday open nfl opening day he was yelling at me for not knowing nba preseason he's fired up yeah nfl opening day until the browns play they're they're like they're gonna be what three they're at least third to last place the the problem that you have max and this is this is mostly my fault i told i told dom like six months ago i said do not talk to me about lebron so he's got to talk to someone else about him so he's just i'm no i'm happy i'm bringing up lebron i was like we're not a lebron show i don't know that he's an ally though he's like an over-involved ex yeah that's like jess making sure that you know how she likes you know she likes her baths not too hot but kind of hot he's a medium bubbles he's a helicopter mom trying to go out for like a dinner and telling the babysitter like oh no no don't do that like she's crazy she likes her feet rubbed before bed max if you can you know take care of my girl oh do not let do not let him eat that pirate's booty i have you looked at the back i need to know these things though okay let's do the games first up uh i think this will be a prominently displayed game because it's one of the best you guys agree bills texans is going to be the main tv yeah but this one's going to be a fun game uh tempe buccaneers at cincinnati bangles bangles are minus three and a half over under 50 and a half baker mayfield got paid is that good or bad because obviously it's good we're big we're a baker show we're happy you got paid i'm just saying is it good or bad because now he might not have the same chip on his shoulder i don't think that that's going to be a factor for baker i don't they could have you know what it is they did a secret extension i know so uh they were working on it behind the scenes baker didn't know about it his agent like kind of kept it from a little bit i don't know why that that all went down that way but i i think that since there's a secret extension baker just might be like oh you didn't think i could handle knowing how the negotiation we're gonna go yeah and sometimes agents will do this they don't want to over inform the players about how it's going because some of the offers might be it might not feel good to hear what the the lowball offers are at the beginning until you get to the final number so baker's like what am i a child you don't think i could handle yeah knowing what was going on back and forth yeah the adults are talking yeah so now baker might be just pissed off at his agent and at the at the bucks for not keeping him informed and again this is just baker trying to find something to be pissed off you gotta find something gotta find something but uh yeah i think uh if you look at these two teams recent history bangles very slow starters but i think they're going to be very slow starters because they're going to be very slow starters They started 2-0 last year So I know that that is is a narrative and i think i'm actually going to go against that narrative now because i the fact they started 2-0 last year the fact that they played their starters at least somewhat in the preseason which they hadn't been doing and that was part of the part of joe burrow sorry so and also joe burrow has just been injured so many times that i think this is the first time he's had an off season where he didn't have to deal with something remember he had the foot he talked about he's like i'm gonna use my legs again like i feel a hundred percent i that has to account for something the fact that he's finally had a clean off season not an off season of rehabbing getting ready everything that goes into it had a full camp he had a full camp got a full camp going zach how are you feeling about this game i feel good about the game uh baker was pumped up in the press conference yesterday excited to stay with the team so i'm not too worried about him getting paid leading to like a lull in the season uh everybody a lot of guys are healthy ready to hit the field i feel good about the game i'm i was high and i am high on joe burrow this season but i would like to see timmy buccaneers obviously defeat them yeah i'm not saying i'm gonna bet the bengals because i think three and a half is probably too much but i'm just i i expect the bengals to to to come out to start the season better than they have and again they started 2-0 last year it was a close win against the browns remember that weird jaguars game um i just i i think they they put a lot of focus on it and it does feel like one of those years where it's like everyone's kind of everything's on the table for the bengals like they yeah if things don't go well they're not going to win i think they're going to win i think they're going to win well is joe burrow gonna stay i know he said that he wants to stay is you know t higgins zach taylor all this stuff so if if you look at the bengals they do have that recent history and if you look at the uh the point total i believe they're one in five uh to the over so i guess that'd be five and one to the under uh in week ones recently and they are uh one in five against the spread in season opens a lot of that does have to do with the fact of injuries yeah and just they're notoriously yeah they have started that they've been getting off to and then the bucks i'm sure you've heard steven chay say this but todd bulls yeah four and oh week one as a head coach they've won uh they've won five consecutive so that even goes back to bruce ariens but yes he has said that to me very a ton of times very much yeah very much the one thing i am looking at like this the total of this game it feels like it's too early in the season to have that high of a total i agree uh but i am also nervous i i do think both of these defenses are going to be bet like we saw the end of last year the bucks defense kind of fell off a cliff i think they're going to be better and i the bangles defense got better at the end of the year and they added dexter lawrence i think that's going to be better than people realize because like that's you know you can always just say oh the bangles defense sucks i think that's kind of a slightly dated narrative i expect them to be more middle of the pack uh defense this year yeah how's ruben bain feeling right now probably good because that's a guy i if i were to pick like a defensive rookie of the year i think i'm looking at bane right now and that might also just be cope because i really don't want the cowboys to have found the safety of the future but uh bane i feel like is just a a monster waiting to play yeah i agree i agree all right so uh wait what are you gonna say zach room bane's ready to inflict pain pft yeah he said that ready for me he didn't say that but in the clips i can see it in his mannerisms good yeah good you can see it also david bailey exists yeah i knew i saw you memes talking with the mic not on being like what about david bailey what about arvel reese well i did i did i saw a headline on uh on joe bucks fan that just said ruben bain wants to create a new level of football oh so that's terrifying that's fucking terror i'm i'm kind of happy with the current level of football we have right now but if it's created like ruben bain it's probably gonna be violent so simon yeah he's wearing the bane face mask so he could turn into a villain yep a new level of football would be awesome that's what they said about travis hunter too right like he's gonna change the entire sport yeah hank is are the bucks part of your hungry dog nope what are you doing just getting ready let's prep i'm doing the hungry dog as we oh i love it all right will you let us know as soon as you have it yeah okay uh next up saints at lions lions minus seven over under 49 and a half i was thinking about this uh this is one of those weird matchups i don't have any memories of the saints playing at the lions and i looked it up yeah i do 2020 was the last time they played saints at lions do you know who the leading rusher for the lions was because this one shocked me and i had memory of the whole thing 2020 it was stafford versus uh drew breeze i remember the game 2020 saints at lions who is the leading rusher for the detroit lions adrian peterson yes bang fucking insane i just forgot i know he jumped around to a million oh there you go get the high five i never get those right yeah that was great i had completely forgot that he was because he jumped around to so many teams at the end and also i think he was leading rusher with like 34 yards so it wasn't exactly uh a memorable performance but yeah these teams i i don't have many memories of them playing in detroit so they have played uh 27 times in the all-time series okay the saints of the lions right now it's tied 13 13 and one oh wow so maybe grudge match huge grudge match of the week it is also a dan campbell not really a revenge game but he used to coach for the saints yeah it's a game it's a game it's a game between games a revenge game like two likable enough teams i think if you're not in the same division you're not in the same division you're not in the same division as either one of these you don't have a problem with either team or on game ball watch right now for kellen moore uh so he's probably what what do you say like he gives out was it six or seven eight game balls again yes i'm trying to remember the interview where hank farted how many how many game balls he gave away well you don't understand the pelicans facility was right there it was right there it was right next also if you saw the chair hey get in the mix here what do you got what do you want we're trying to poke you we're trying to get you up let us poke get you up i'm here it's week one dude yeah i'm excited football's back football's so fucking back okay um uh jared goff dome yep he doesn't play a cold weather game until late december week 17 the bears i also i feel like the the i'm high on the lions this year yep and part of the reason why i'm high on the lions is that like before the season is starting the biggest quote i could find about this game and like from lions camp was jared goff talking about his trip to the detroit zoo and he's like i'm high on the lions this year and i'm high on the lions this year and i'm high on his daughter i love that so that that that's actually a good place to be in as a team he said i was blown away by how many animals they have and how big it is the tiger was cool right there on the glass the polar bear the grizzly bears are massive i was shocked maybe i underestimate the capabilities of detroit zoo yeah don't do that wow underestimate that zoo at your own peril yeah i think he just was had he had jared ever been to a zoo before i don't i think he in his mind i don't want to jared i'm gonna text him i'm gonna ask him if he'd ever been to a zoo but this is i think it might be flashbacks to um you remember 2016 when he he wasn't aware that the sun rose in the east and set in the west on hard knocks in his mind i could i could see him thinking that the only animals they'd have at the detroit zoo would be like animals that you would find in nature in michigan yeah like oh look they got they got the black squirrels here i also will say uh jared goff is a cali kid i feel like they don't besides sandy diego i feel like cali kids they just go out they go outside yeah they don't go to zoos yeah no and also what what we can say isn't like san diego i said besides san diego it is the best i gotta lock in you gotta lock in but you can't say you can't say california yeah they have the biggest i agree if you're from california uh you should in theory know that like but he's from norcal it rocks bro but you can't norcal bros are so different than socal bros there's like one zoo that i know and it happens to be in california right so you can't just like you know hey you don't got you got a face there you know one zoo you only know like one like famous zoo you know lots of zoos i guess like the cincinnati zoo because of harambe yeah you know uh we talked about like a mile away we talked about 20 zoos on this podcast i know people i'm saying like nationally recognized zoos bronx zoo bronx zoo bronx zoo how about that yeah song bronx that's local zoo that's an that's a an author zootopia that's a movie yeah you know that's not that's probably sounds like you know it so that's a movie yeah that's a movie yeah that's not that's probably sounds like you know it zoolander oh that's also a movie madagascar right mark who mark zoom off six years legend legendary broadcaster all right i'll update you if jared texts me back but i was blown away by how many animals they have and how big it is tiger was cool right there on the glass polar bear the grizzly bears are massive i was shocked i've been his first zoo that to me i'd like to see more nfl teams taking group trips to the zoo yeah before things get you can learn a lot from those animals uh by the way last thing on this game we are obviously laddering tyler shuck yep 100 oh yeah oh 100 i'm also to the moon tyler shuck i'm also i'm very high on the lines this year yeah i mean their their their schedule is they should be a team that's in the playoffs and i think they probably will win the nfc north in theory this is like i mean the lines are as healthy as they're going to be all season well and they they they were the teeth they were the snakebitten team last year where they lost a bunch of games and were like how the fuck did they lose that game yeah i think they're gonna be really good are the lions on crosby watch oh interesting didn't even think about that like what do what do they have to do to get to get crosby interested in going to the lions and i guess it's not really up to him it would have to be the raiders yeah i don't know what their pick situation is either how many picks they would be willing to trade all i'm saying is they're on i think them and maybe the cowboys might cross me watch i had a dream last night this is the crosby show we'll call it this is gonna be really pathetic to say out loud i had a dream last night that that the Bears traded Tyson Bajan for the Seahawks' first-round pick. Fleeced. I was like, damn, I like Tyson Bajan, but got to fucking do that. Honestly, fleeced. First-round pick. Okay, next up, Jets at Titans. Titans minus one and a half, over under 38 and a half. The Robert Salah revenge game. Memes? I know we said we weren't going to do overreactions. I think this is the biggest game of Aaron Glenn's life. Okay. No, that's not an overreaction. It's because it's not a reaction. True. The game hasn't happened yet. Yeah, I think he needs to prove that he can coach better than the guy he replaced. It's a pre-action. Yeah, it's a pre-action. You're over-preacting right now. And will you think that it's the biggest game of his life if they lose or if they win? Or both? Both. He needs to win the game. No matter what happens, it's going to be the biggest game of his life. Yeah, because if they lose, then in all Jets fans' heads, it's like, we just replaced Bob with a guy who's worse than him, and Bob's not a good coach, so we just have a bad coach. Yeah. Right. So losing the locker room, potentially. Both of these teams. Losing the fan locker room. Yeah. Both of these teams, obviously, are not expected to be in the playoffs. You never know what happens in the NFL season. This might be the most important. This might be the most important game of week one, because there's the level of, like, there could be a devastating loss here if one team gets blown out. I do think that. Like, that's devastating. Whichever team loses, they might immediately go into tank mode. Right. Like, right off the bat. Because they're both eyeing each other, being like, we're not as bad as you. We're not as bad as you. It's going to be a wake-up call for whoever loses this game. Yeah. It's a really, really, like, like, you, in a weird way, you would rather start the season playing the Ravens. And it's like, well. Oh, we're never going to win that game. We still have a long season. You play the Titans. It's very similar to Raiders-Dolphins. That's a staring match of, like, whoever loses that game, like, you stink, buddy. Yeah, no. Season's probably over if you lose to the Titans. Yeah. I think they're thinking the exact same thing about the Jets. There's only a handful of teams out there that, when their logo pops up on your schedule, you're happy to see those logos. And I think this is two matchups of two teams that are very happy to see each other's logos. And I count myself. I count myself in that handful of teams as well. But, yeah. You can't lose this game, Ames. Can't lose. And you have to get a pick, too. There's no better venue to get a pick than against Cam Ward. The defense feels good. Like, it should be better. You got to set the tone. I always forget that we didn't have an interception last year. Yeah. Well, no, you don't because you bring it up all the time. Yeah, true. It is the first. I feel like you guys bring it up a lot. No, but he brings it up a lot, too. Yeah. It's a crazy stat. He literally. When they got the preseason interception, he's like, yeah, we got an interception. Yeah, it's fired up. We got a bunch of interceptions. Yeah. If our memes guy was not memes and our memes guy was a fan of a different team, I think that individual would probably be encouraged to make a lot of stats that said things like this is the first week one game of a team that intercepted zero passes last year. Like, everything they do for the first time this season. That was the first time out by a team that intercepted zero passes in 2025. I think that would probably happen if it wasn't. Yeah, probably. I might have some in my drafts that are like that, but the good thing you got going for you memes is the Titans have their new jerseys. And I think, like, whenever you wear a new jersey, I don't take you as a real football team for a few weeks. You know, like, this is a made up team, but we can maybe sneak them. What if everything's different in these jerseys? I thought about that. Yeah, true. I took the Jets in my Survivor League. It's ballsy. You like that memes? I love it. Yeah. The Jets. I think the Jets are going to be good. Memes. I kind of like the Jets this week, too. I love the Jets this week. Oh, man. I don't know. We all love the Jets. I have my most boring stat of the week. Okay. You ready for this? No, that's too exciting of a sound. We got to think of a more boring sound for the most boring stat of the week. Okay. The Tennessee Titans are traveling. 18,157 miles this year. Whoa. Did you get a magazine with the information on teams traveling? Is this your new? No, I literally saw one graphic of travel stats this year. So I actually compared that to last year for the Titans and for the Patriots. We're going to get even more boring. Yeah, no. No, no. You did this for a lot of teams. No, it was literally these two. The Tennessee Titans total travel distance in 2025 was 18,157 miles. All right. That's crazy. They're traveling the exact same amount of miles. That's wild. Back to back years. That's wild. That's pretty fucking wild. That's wild. Apologize for doubting the stat. That's not a boring stat. I didn't say it was boring. PFT did. Apologize to yourself. I'd like to apologize to the listeners for underselling just how exciting that stat would be. Play the sound again, big cat. Pretty good stat. Okay. Memes, you're going to win this game. I think there's a top three game of the week. Um, okay. Disagree. I think for you. No, I think for everybody. Just like last year, it's going to be the same thing. Okay. Sell this on it. High scoring. Yep. Both defenses could be bad. Yep. That's pretty much it. Okay. I'm seeing more than two games that are better. Name them. Chiefs Broncos. No. Patrick Mahomes washed. Okay. Texans Bills. Defense. Defense. Defensive game. Probably like 1310 final score. Okay. Bucks Bengals. Great game. That's one. That's one. Vikings Packers. Yeah. Yeah. Another low scoring game. Commanders Eagles. For the podcast. Great. All right. We're done doing this. All right. Ravens minus three and a half at the Colts over under 47 and a half. The Baltimore Ravens. Lamar Jackson is 20 and six against the spread on turf in his career. Mm-hmm. If you want to step, that's a good stat. I'm, I'm high on the Ravens this year. We do have a brotherly battle going on. Did you guys see this? Declan Doyle, new OC for the Baltimore Ravens. His brother, younger brother, Dylan Doyle is the Colts defensive quality control coach. And when they asked him about it, Declan said they haven't taught. He hasn't talked to Dylan for a while. He said, I love my brother, but it is what it is. That feels a little, a little much for a week. One game where you're, your brother's not even the defensive coordinator. Yeah. I don't know about that. We haven't talked in a while. Like we're like, we can't talk. We, we, we have to end this relationship. Enemies. Yeah. No, here's your defensive quality control and no relation to Jack Doyle from the Colts. I'm assuming. I don't think so. Different Doyle family. Yes. Yeah. I mean, Lamar Jackson loves playing on turf. He loves playing at the Colts as well. Yup. It's a good stadium for him to run around. Also. I believe. With Lou and Arumo defenses, Lamar Jackson tends to feast in the past. So I, I, I like the Colts. I am high on the Colts this year. I don't know about week one though. Yeah. I feel like this, I think I might be taking the Ravens in this one, but also I believe that there is a new, this is our Colts that just came out from Seth to flow Erskine's. Okay. And he's got a very special guest. What'd he say? Do we want to listen to it? It literally just came out. He was. I love it. He's been teasing it all week. Are you guys ready? Yeah. It's the Purdue varsity. Oh my God. Wow. This is our Colts. We love them. One, two. Colts. Let's bring them on tomorrow. This is our Colts. This is our Colts. This is our Colts. This is our team. Okay. Go Colts. I love it. I love it. So that was the Purdue varsity glee club was the special guests. I let those guys get a lot of pussy. We just got done telling you that we liked the Ravens in this. I might flip. What? What, Max? Did you guys know you could go JV and glee? Wait, it's JV? This is varsity. Oh yeah. True. True. The implication. Yeah. JV. Freshman. Those guys actually probably do clean up. I think I actually think in a place like they definitely clean up at a place like Purdue. It's like Purdue has no everything is the opposite. Yeah, but they yeah, they might clean up more than the football. I agree. I'm pretty sure Purdue is like 85% male. It's you got that for me. It's like 60%. I have maybe made it. Definitely. Like, yes, I made it seem like it's like all an all male college, but I think these guys do. I think these guys are the cock of the walk. I'm looking at the Glee. Glee Club in the background. It's it's all dudes in the Glee Club. Yeah, but you don't think there's groupies. There might be like a female. Oh, there's the corral. I guess if it's horses. Yes. But then they step to the female Glee Club. The she club. Yeah. I have a headache club. Okay. 59%. Yeah. So yeah, basically 85%. Yeah. Okay. Well, I'm glad that we watch this because I think I'm changing my pick to the to the goals. Okay. Yeah. - Also, before we started taping, I did log in gone to the Colts website because I was not sure if I had season tickets or not. This year. Do not have season tickets. Okay, good. This year, so we don't have to give any tickets away. Are you sure? Yeah, I mean, I just looked at my account. I got a lot of Akron season tickets. Yeah, I just got Akron parking passes in my mailbox. No one gives a fuck about Akron or wants to go to the football games. Oh, God. Yep. I like that. That's more shotsy, Tom. Did you guys see? We had our quote of the week. You want to get the quote of the week sound, Hank? Quote of the week. Whoa, okay. There's the parentheses. Okay, okay. Quote of the week comes. We should have put that in the audio book. That was a deaf child. Was it open parentheses or closed parentheses? I was opening any clothing. It was like. Okay, all right. We'll open it before he gives. Quote of the week. This is quote of the week from Roquan Smith. He said. He said, uh, Lamar Jackson and the Ravens offense can beat defenses with their run game or go bombs over Baghdad. Actually, it's not the quote of the week. It's a clarification of the week. Can you give us a sound for that? Great sound. So Roquan Smith said we could beat defenses with their run game or go bombs over Baghdad. Then he later clarified he was referencing military history, not outcast lore. Uh. So I don't know. He was actually talking about literal bombs over Baghdad. That was a close one. Yeah. For anyone who was getting confused. He could have been talking about Andre 3000 and not Colin Powell. Yes. So not great song because he was talking about the actual bombs. It is a great song. Yeah, but he was talking about the. There's your clarification of the week. I just loved it. He was like, just so we're clear, guys, the very popular song that would make this lighthearted and very fun. We're not talking about that. We're talking about death and war. Yeah, I like this from a defense. A player. Yeah. Good clarification from a defensive player. If this came from a running back, offensive lineman, wide receiver, I'd be like, that's kind of fucked up what's going on. Yeah. But the fact that he plays the position he plays, I think it's helpful that he meant war. Yeah. Yeah. Really, really helpful. Um, all right. Before we get some more games. PFT. Let's talk about King's wine real quick. I'd love to talk about our favorite. It's the best. What do you think is the toughest part of football season? It used to be figuring out what to eat on game day. But not this year. Thanks to King's Hawaiian. It's the best slider in football. They have it all from original Hawaiian sweet to savory butter and pretzel sliders. You can literally make anything on them and you know, it's going to be delicious. I personally love the original Hawaiian sweet. They make the best Buffalo chicken sliders and I make the best bacon cheeseburger sliders on their original slider rolls. You crush about a dozen every Sunday. Hank, they even have a salt salty version just for you. Oh, awesome. You could make a ham and cheese slider on the pretzel slide. Slider buns. That sounds delicious. You're a salty guy. You'd love them. And I love ham. I go ham. Whatever you're craving. King's Hawaiian is the best slider in football for a reason. They elevate game day. They're sure to be a crowd pleaser. So before next game day, go pick up King's Hawaiian and make the best slider in football and make it all season long. Okay, you guys ready to get back some more games? It's just so much fun talking ball. Just so excited reading like all this stuff and just getting excited about everything. It's a lot and I'm so happy for it. I'm so happy for us. I can't wait for the I love this for us for that moment and it's every year at 1220 when we're in the middle. We got all the games going and we're just going to be overwhelmed by football. We should take a picture. We should take a picture five minutes before and just say I love this for us. Yeah. Yeah. I'm booked and busy this weekend. All right. Falcons at Steelers Steelers minus three and a half over under is 42 and a half to a to a there's some some new news coming out about to I saw it was a Florio. It was a Florio is a Florio on the eve of the season opener. Yes, Florio takes to the takes to the airwaves and puts out a report that if things don't go well for to even as early as week one. He might get cut. Yep. That is not a good spot for to a to start the season that is under threat of his job before he takes a snap for the Falcons. No. So to a is it's actually if you want to spin zone it. It's like maybe this is a maybe this good way. It's like almost a Mr. Beast challenge like be good at quarterback or lose your job. It's kind of fun. Yeah, you know, like like actually lose your job, not just lose your job playing quarterback lose your employment status with the Atlanta Falcons. Yeah, it it could be motivating. It could be motivated. It could be if from what you know about to a do you think that it will be? No, no, no, no to it to a a he said that he the expectation I put on myself is to go out there and score one more point than the other team. I feel like you could maybe do more than just one more point. Like, you know, I mean like that. I get it. One more point is the bare minimum, but shoot for the stars. And if you miss you, you'll be a moon. I think shoot for the moon. Well, you're kind of right. You miss you'll land in the stars never made sense because stars are so much better. I think that's what what screwed me up. Yeah, you were actually right. Yeah, and screwing that statement up, right? But to a shoot for let's try. Let's try scoring two more points. Yeah, then the seal right that way if you're wrong by 50% guess what you still win. Yeah. He also said that I don't have anything to prove to anyone on the outside. You actually do. Yeah, definitely have a lot to prove to all of us. Probably every other team. Yeah, but then again to up he got paid. You got paid and he had to and on for a long time. Yeah, I do think Kevin Stefanski from his quotes. I think we're gonna see a lot of run game. I'm excited to see him unleash Bijan and it's gonna be I like I said, I'm not high on the Falcons this year. I'm high on Kevin Stefanski as a coach. I'm high on the Falcons like some of the talent they have going forward. It's just I don't know what the quarterback situation is going to look like. Yeah, it kind of strikes me almost like their quarterback situation going into the season is what we found out about the Michigan quarterback situation after right week one, right? Where Stefanski is like putting this out there and two has no idea that his job might even be in jeopardy right now. I'm very excited to see what the Steelers office looks like. Yeah, and it's a very low bar for you to convince me that it's different from years past. All it takes is really just one play. Yeah, if they have one play like a deep cross across the middle and Aaron Rodgers hits DK in stride. I'll just think it's a completely new team and they might be an explosive offense this year. Yeah, I agree. Now if it starts out the first pass that he throws, is a like a dump off on third down to Jalen Warren at that point. I'm just going to book it and say this is the same Steelers that we've seen. Yeah, a dump off with with six Falcons just waiting to tackle. It's it's that that will bother me and I hope Jersey Jerry will agree with us when we say, hey, that's bad. Yeah, no, he'll be the first person to say it. I also think Aaron Rodgers like some of his quotes. I think this actually might be the end. He said something like it was something about how it's it's more than just football and winning games. Who's going to be there at your Hall of Fame ceremony? Who's going to carry your casket? The relationships? Yeah, I don't know if that's a good or bad quote when you're going into a season kind of is a kind of sentimental about his football career before he plays a season. Who is he saying is going to carry his casket on the Steelers? I don't know. He said, yeah, I don't know if it's Steelers or somewhere else. Maybe it's Mike McCarthy. If you just get out of out of this the money and the accolades you're missing the main point of this whole thing football and that's the relationship. Who's carrying your casket? Who's at your Hall of Fame speech? I mean, I would want Mike McCarthy to use my casket as a motivational tool like smash a casket to get the boys pumped up with a sledgehammer before the game. Also, I can I can I say right now I apply I'll carry his casket. You would be the guys from Uganda. I'll do it dancing with it. No, I mean Rogers we're good now. It's it's so it feels like years ago that he was on the Packers, doesn't it? It does. It's been it's like it's a it does feel like a long time even though it's been only what four or five years, but it's going to feel more like it because he's back with McCarthy. Yeah, like seeing those two like staring at each other. It is going to be weird to see them like getting along. Yeah, and collaborating on shit. Yeah. Yeah, it's going to be it's going to be very interesting to see the Steelers offense. I'm excited about that. And then also Mike Tomlin kind of got in on dunking on two or two. Okay, so Mike Tomlin. Oh, yeah, I saw that made a comment about like his ass might get fried. Yep. So things don't seem to be pointing in the right direction at quarterback for the Falcons, but I do think I think they could surprise some people this year. I mean Bajan is like he's he's the best surprise how I think that they might win me worse than you thought. No, I think that there's be a funny surprise if it's all about like if Pinnock's can get back. Yeah, if they have somebody besides to a playing quarterback I can see them winning nine games because that could be like to it could be worse than I expect. That would be a surprise. How would that be possible? Oh, he could definitely do it. What if he throws nine picks? Yeah, hilarious surprise shoot for the Grand Canyon. If you miss you might wind up in a toilet. Oh man. All right. I like to I like to steal it. This is the Steelers Falcons is my sucker bet of the of the week because I just I'm going to bet the Steelers and it's it's probably always it. Oh, no. as part of your hungry dog? Can you tell us who else saw that? It's Falcons, Jets. Who's the third? Commanders? Fuck. Giants, New York. Wow. Oh, leaving you something for the end of the night. I like that. Yeah, everyone saw it. Myself included. Cowboys, Cowboys, Cowboys. This is their year. I think the Giants, Big Cat, super high on the Giants. And the Cowboys. Memes super high on the Jets. Depending on what week we're talking about. And I'm just a sucker for a shitty lefty. Oh, for Tua. Yeah. Okay. Did you see her singing at the Grand Ole Opry the other day? No. A shitty lefty. Yeah. Oh, I like her. She's good. Oh, cool. She's not shitty. Industry plant. Yeah, that's true. I still don't really understand what industry plant means. The music industry is literally like the music industry is a garden. Everyone's a plant. Right. Yeah. But also, like, is it just that your dad was a billionaire? I found out more about it yesterday. So she got started. She became popular because she had 15 second snippets of her songs that went viral on TikTok all the time. Okay. And then after that, she made an album. I don't know if she had a full song before she had, or if she just wrote to like 15 seconds. Yeah. But so everyone paid attention to her 15 seconds on TikTok. And that is where the wealthy father could probably come in because you can get your daughter signed to some sort of big representation deal that has connections that push. Got it. Your shit to the top of the TikTok algorithms. Hey, you might want to play this song. And by the way. I think her music is catchy. And well, yeah, the music. Well, isn't it? Isn't it just no con? Because yeah, she copies other hit songs. Which again, music industry. That is literally the music industry. The Beatles. I like it. Yeah. You can like it. Just relax, dude. Forget it. Why don't you marry her, dude? It's been a while. It's been a while since you had a wedding. Yeah. No more marriage. I'm done. I just. Well, I'm still married. We should. We should say that calling her dad wealthy is wrong. He's he started Groupon. He's like Billy. Yeah. Yeah. Wealthy would be. Yeah. Like, oh, he's got 20 million. He's got a nice little house in Lake Forest. No, no. They're still left the industry plan. Again, don't understand. If you like the music, you like the music. Who the fuck cares? But it is fun to just say industry plant without like it's very loaded and I don't really know what it means. There's definitely. He's got to be some NFL players that are industry plants for sure. Yeah. Well, there's definitely industry plants like in the broadcasting world. Go on. Collins were a son. No Eagle like that shit is, you know, I think there's a difference though between Nepo and industry plant. It can be related. Like, I think she's an industry plant because her dad had the money. Oh, that's true. Yeah. Yeah. Make her industry plant. Yeah. Yeah. Like they boot the money to boost her and basically buy her way to that. Ross Tucker industry. She was her dad wasn't in music. Right. Yeah. I miss miss misunderstood. Oh, industry plant. No, that's I misunderstood. Industry plant cream team. You come from a long line of cream teamers. Okay. Bears did sit by the way. I did. Oh, it's a man, by the way. He's part of this. He's a silent member of the cream team. I did see an accusation that Zach is industry plant the other day, which is a very funny. That's honestly a compliment to Zach. Like, I'll take it. Zach, what is it about you? What is it about you that you think that these things happen? Like, do you remember when I had to genuinely ask you? I was like, have you been in prison? Because there was like someone in our office was like, Zach might have been in prison. Well, that was wrong because of the tattoo. Yeah, it is a prison tattoo, no prison on body or prison time spent. I'm so far on the side. But like industry plant prison. Like, it's kind of funny that you get these things thrown at you. The Venn diagram doesn't make much sense to me. But you rolled the punches. I got it. Well, I got to tell that story because I was telling it to someone else. And it just makes me laugh because Ron, one of my good friends and he or he called. He talked to PFT and he called me and was like, I had a one on one conversation with Hank. Like, I don't I don't think he's been in prison, but Ron thinks like definitely he might have been in prison. So like, should we? But Ron's also like a very sarcastic, like ball buster. Like, a lot of the conversations are like tongue in cheek. And like. We're joking. And it's like, yeah, I was like, surely he's not serious. He's like, no, dead serious. Like, we got to check on H.R. Because like, those are like gang prison tattoos. And I was like, you're joking, right? Like, this is a joke. I can see Zach. No, I'm dead serious. I can see him playing a video game. And then one of the guys in the video game is in prison, has that tattoo. And Zach's like, I like that tattoo. Hey, we're taping part of my take right now. When you started the rumor that Zach was in prison because of his prison tattoo, were you being serious? Well, I just figured that he did time. I feel like with those specific markings have like a very significant gang suggestion. And I would check. Have you guys ever seen his elbows? I would check his elbows for some kind of like spider web tattoo. Elbows are clean. Because we were just randomly. We're doing a week one preview. And we got on to the idea of industry plants. And Zach's being accused of being an industry plant. And then I brought up. I was like, remember the time when I had to ask you if you had been in prison? And yeah, it's not the beginning of the departed when they put him in prison for a little bit. So he has a good backstory. Yeah. And check underneath his shoulders. If there's if there's stars on the front of his shoulders, he's a Russian disinformation asset. Just keep an eye on it. Ron, I did notice that he has a teardrop, but I think the teardrop might be chocolate syrup. Is the chocolate syrup? Chilled in. Yeah. Maybe that's just. That is a homie who did something. Okay. Yeah. All right. Hey, Ron. Good to talk to you. Just maybe cook up in the next couple of weeks. Just another wild tale of Zach. And we'll get it going. Yeah, maybe. And maybe you won't even see it coming. Yeah. Hopefully it gets implanted from the back end. Enjoy the episode. All right. See you. Bye. Why would I want to get industry planted into prison? That'd be bad. It's like worst place to get planted. No, that's what they did in. In Blackbird. In the movie. New guy. Got the guy. You got the son of a bitch. Yeah. They sent him. He was a nerd in school. Then they send him. He goes to prison. Then comes back, changes his hair, takes off his glasses. Cool guy. She's all that. I love the idea of Zach living out departed. And he basically, they had to send him to prison, then send him. I guess what would it be? It would be maybe you're doing this to then take down another podcast. Oh, it's a long game. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Bad friends. Like if we started a fake rumor that you're going to date Rudy and bad friends or like the Rosillo draft, I go over there and then take them out. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. All right. Back to games. He would fuck you up. Bears minus three Panthers at the Panthers over under 46 and a half. How many times are you going to show the trade graphic? Yeah. A lot. I had twice once before the game, once during the game. And if there's a blowout either way, they might show it as well. Yeah. So you got Caleb Darnell, right? DJ more Luther burden, Tyreek Stevenson and Tori Taylor for Bryce Young. Essentially. Who do you think won that trade? I want to say the bears. I'm not going to, I'm biased here. You guys can, you guys can say who you think won that trade. I'm going to wait till all the facts come out. Okay. That's fair. That's fair. Yeah. Darnell, right? Just got a, a big contract extension. Luther burden. I, I said this, I believe on Wednesday show this season is, uh, I'm not going to say it. I'm going into it knowing that the defense is probably not going to be good unless there's an absolute miracle. Uh, so like the regression conversation, totally agree with it on the defensive side. I need the regression not to happen on the offensive side to be a success. So I need it to be progression on offense. Like there's a world where the bears don't make the playoffs, but they're a top five offense. And our defense is so bad that I can almost like, I would be very upset, but I could deal with it. They'll. The world that would be an abject failure of this season is if the defense is bad and the offense is also bad, that would be a problem. A step back. Now, how would you feel if we would look back on this game and the defense gives up, uh, 400 yards, but, but you create three turnovers. If we give up 400 yards to the Panthers offense, we're going to be in a lot of trouble. I, both sides are going to look at it and be like, it's, it's out of control. It's actually a, it's, it's kind of a game within a game. It's almost like the jets in the Titans game where the Panthers offense is looking at the bears defense. Like we got to get them. Yeah. And the bears defense is looking at the Panthers offense and be like, we, if we can't stop them, what, what else? Like what happens when we play some like explosive offenses? Yeah. I'm just, I'm wondering because that to me might be one of the more frustrating positions to be in where you're not sure if your defense is good or not, or if you're just really lucky at creating turnovers. Well, I will say, I do think there is. Like this used to happen with lovey Smith teams where it's like, Oh, the, the turnover is like, there is a way to coach it. I do think Al Harris does do that. Like, I think he's very, very good at coaching, playing on the ball and getting the ball and taking the ball away. I do expect, I don't, I I'm not like going into the season being like, Oh, the defense might be good. I think the defense I'm going into the season being like, the defense is not good. Just how not good is it? If that makes sense. But this, I feel like you might be able to, if you get a lead. in this game. yeah no i think i think the defense might look good i think we're gonna be a fun team in the fact that i a lot of these games are gonna have to probably be shootouts yeah and so caleb looking taking that next step forward luther uh roma dunes a colson loving who i think is going to be an absolute superstar that these are the things that need to happen and it starts with with this one you got to do it i mean the pit like i i don't think this is an easy game because the panthers aren't as bad as they have been and yeah but i like we started with this whole entire conversation i'm excited that this is the game we start with it's a perfect time team everything so it's not overlooking the panthers it's more just i don't have to deal with any panthers fans in my life so uh david tepper he addressed the media for the first time in a very long time and talked about expectations for the team and for for his quarterback he said i'd like to see a string together two winning seasons together for the first time in a very long time first time in this franchise's history so that's this year and next year wait that's true that's success that can't be true is that true it's it sounded like something that's not true but i thought back the cam newton era they got to the playoffs at least once with a losing record they went 15 and one they fall off that bad the year after i think they got to the playoffs with at least it was 500 or maybe maybe a losing record god because ron rivera i think he's the first team to ever get two different teams to the playoff with losing records oh my god it's true yeah the the best they did was they had uh 2005 when they went to the conference uh nfc uh they went 11 and 5 the next year they went 8 and 8 yep that's that's crazy i never realized that pretty crazy right holy shit yep and they're not even yes so they're not even doing it this year they can't even complete it they can't do it this year so now that's even though they went to the playoffs last year yeah they had they have to do one winning season right now and then another winning season next year then they'll have two in a row okay so that's a high goal high why didn't he just say let's get a winning season then we'll deal with next year because he wants to or just like shoot for the moon so that that is the confusing part because they went to the playoffs three years in a row yeah they went 12 and 4 7 8 and 1 yep 15 and 1 that's basically two winning seasons in a row it feels like more honestly it feels like yeah kind of like a dynasty yeah at that point okay uh next game we're going to the bills at texans this will be main tv bills minus one and a half texans uh at the texans over under 44 and a half josh allen it feels like houston is a house of horrors for him he's never won in houston and we've also had some like bad moments he remember last year he got absolutely smushed that was the game that we did the case race and people texans fans were very upset at us for that remember that yeah we were hammered we were so hammered we gotta do a case race again uh yeah demico ryan's defense have given him problems i don't this is my i don't know game i have no idea i i i kind of lean the bills but i have no idea like maybe this is just we don't know what it's going to look like we don't know what brady's offense is necessarily going to look like in it excuse me in its entirety with dj moore i don't know what i think it's gonna be good jim leonard's defense is gonna look like the aggressiveness like they're not gonna be as maybe vanilla as sean mcdermott had it i think i would take the uh the texans just based on the fact that he's been in hell when he's been in houston oh and three in houston he did beat the texans in 2021 40 to nothing at home um and i i believe this is true said it's been 20 years since the bills have won a game in houston wow long time uh i do like the texans in this just because it feels a little bit disrespectful yeah that that the bills will be favored on the road against a team that that kind of beat the fuck out of him last year yeah i don't really i guess maybe people were just like uh you know jayden higgins got hurt so now it's just nico collins what's the what's the montgomery like everyone knows the texan defense gonna be they're they're fucking awesome there's dudes everywhere they don't even have to like domico ryan's doesn't have to do exotic shit he just can be like our guys are better than your guys yeah will anderson called it a afc championship preview oh all right an afc championship type game i think is what he said okay i need to figure out what cj stroud's doing with his thumbs and his eyes before games yeah i don't know i don't know is that a mental reset is that resetting the neurons what is he is that strictly just for eyes i would like to know as well because whatever he's doing i'm like i see somebody doing that it looks like they they're onto something i want to know what it is yeah yeah did you guys see also sean mcdermott doing a couple we gotta have sean mcdermott on again now that uh i think he's been doing a little bit of media but he said that part of what he's been doing since he got fired by the bills is uh talking to people that were in the building and being like what what is the stuff that i didn't know what's the stuff that never got elevated to me which that has to suck yeah to just basically be like what was everyone saying behind my back that's the most that's gotta suck i think that's the most fired football coach move yeah i respect that no no you have to do it i'm not saying that it's not the right it's the 100 right thing to do to get your blind spots figure them out he's doing i'm just saying on himself to to have to like go back and and have people be like yeah we thought this when you did this that's gotta just you're basically that's he's gonna be better for it but it's torture in the in the moment now if if like he hits you up and you're on the bills that's got to be uncomfortable to be like hey here's honestly what people said about you right that's what i'm saying you think that people you have to know somebody that would be honest and willing to share that that's what i'm saying that's that is that has to be just not a fun there's always those people that wanted that want to feel like they want to let you know though oh yeah like this is my moment we should actually have him on and tell him what he did on our interviews with us what we thought about him yeah how come you didn't bring up the 9-11 thing with us yeah why didn't you talk about that yeah he's probably busy today putting together a powerpoint or something do you think anyone said to him like hey man the 9-11 thing was a little weird yeah yeah i think so yeah okay well no i'm saying maybe not because it didn't it didn't come out until like years later right which would probably imply that it was somebody that was no longer in the building that i don't know it feels like maybe that should be your sign as head 9-11 comparison in a positive manner and nobody checks you in that moment you're surrounded by yes men yeah but also hank he kind of got the backlash for that do you think that like some if you ask someone like give me the honest truth they're probably like well he already knows about the 9-11 thing they're probably not gonna say it again right it gets thrown in there like yeah and the 9-11 thing oh it's like a da da da like yeah oh yeah and that whole like 9-11 thing that some people did some things is what you're saying yeah yeah um okay before we get to afternoon slate twisted tea we love twisted tea football season is back it's the moment we've all been waiting for football season is back in full swing which means we'll be posted up with an ice cold tea until further notice twisted tea is a refreshing hard ice tea made with real brewed tea five percent alcohol in the twisted tea party pack has a little something for everyone with original half and half raspberry and peach it's got the refreshing taste with a little kick it goes down smooth making it the perfect drink to keep the good times going at the tailgate all day and all football season long whether you're tailgating at the stadium crushing teas in your man cave or grilling out with your friends twisted tea is there to turn your day up a notch and make a good time a great time we love the half and half the original grab a refreshing twisted tea today keep it twisted with twisted tea okay afternoon boys dolphins raiders raiders minus three over under a 40 and a half clint kubiak's already kind of pissing me off in what way well the whole brock bowers thing that was crazy that that is weird the report that came out yesterday being like he's brock bowers needs a little trim a little trimmy of his meniscus they treated no big deal they treated his knee like it was uh sideburns i said it was a haircut he described it like it's it's not a big deal just needs to take a little off the top right so yeah clint kubiak did a press conference said that uh everyone's ready to go they asked specifically about max crosby and brock bowers like he's good to go hour later oh yeah actually he had a little minor surgery he's not good to go that pisses me off it was just a little cleanup though that's the thing it's no big deal uh and he should be back he should miss more than like a few maybe four yeah maybe five weeks why is everybody freaking out why is everyone freaking out it's not a big deal stop saying it's a big deal it is kind of a dirty move to pull yeah i don't want to make like gambling seem like it's the end of the road but the league fantasy yeah fantasy the league does have a shitload of gambling sponsors and they're like hey sign up for this sign up for that and then they have an injury report that's supposed to be legit yes and then it seems like this is certainly something they knew about yeah uh did you guys know a fun little fact about the miami dolphins they're the only team in recorded history uh to have more they're paying players more that are not on the roster than players on the active roster and it's mostly two it's two uh yeah two uh tyree kill uh i think i think there's some minka fitzpatrick in there um what is two like 54 mil yeah 54 mil uh yeah there's a lot there's a lot so 183 million dollars going to dead cap players that are uh not on the active roster 104 on the roster what would you guess uh since 1999 these teams have played a bunch they've played uh 16 times since 1999 what would you guess the record is between the two of them 16 times they played 16 times since when since 1999 how could i make how could i tell you the stat where both teams somehow have a losing record uh it's it's actually not one team's been dominant oh really matchup yeah all right i was surprised uh the dolphins dolphins fucking own them yeah 13 and 3 against the raiders since 1999 wow i'm gonna i'm gonna guess that's probably their best record against any team in the yeah in that time span uh that's crazy i do think i know everyone's saying that the dolphins the roster is uh not looking good well it's young at all they have uh in their secondary yeah starting they have a combined uh 17 nfl starts total and and 11 of the 17 are from one guy juju brentz but i think i think being young in this situation is actually not the worst thing i think you're going to find some guys that can play and you're going to find some guys that can play and you're going to find some guys that can play and you're going to find some guys that can play and you're going to find some guys that can play also they don't have any bad memories of all the dumb shit that that organization's done in the past yeah i mean it's better than just keep doing the same thing over and over and and not getting anywhere yeah yeah i agree with that and i i don't know if it's just the uh the coaching that he had last year but i'm kind of high on malik willis just over certainly over where he was a couple years ago yeah but like i don't think he's a bad quarterback no no i agree um not having the same talent around him that he had on the packers we'll see what that looks like but i agree i mean he was he was dynamic when he came in for the pack yeah so i i don't know i don't know what the uh the offense is going to look like in miami but if anything like the packers offense i think it's a good fit for him look and if you want if you want to know how far malik willis has come remember two years ago when he played i think he had to start like what was like week two or three and you're like bet against malik willis no matter what he's come this far yeah true yeah he's won me over yeah uh by the way i missed a game in the early slate but you're gonna love hank that i missed a game uh the browns at the jaguars that's early okay yeah so we could talk about that right now yeah browns and jaguars jaguars minus eight and a half over under 39 and a half not to not to toot my own horn but in terms of predictions looking good right away my uh least improved player deshaun watson got arrested for or got stopped for speeding he's somehow becoming a worse person so that's a pretty good start son of a i think he was going like 20 miles it wasn't that bad it was 86 and a 60 he was going you've definitely gone 80 you may have gone 86 and a 60 today okay so max is deshaun watson defender yeah wow got it wow 86 and a 60 is not that bad i haven't seen you this fired up about okay well you were just trying to do victory laps on no no no and then i saw it and i was like this is nothing through two like least improved player and and that's a hard thing to do because he's really really bad in a bad person big improvement from rubbing tugs no no who's saying he's he stopped doing that i don't think that this is behavior this he was not leaving a rubbing tug you're not driving 20 miles an hour you know he's going to stress you know he's going to what if he's what if he's going to practice and he can't wait to get there i'm just saying he he could end up beat like if he just starts picking up it's an improvement from miles garrett tickets left and right he's just a worse person miles garrett isn't he's a fast driver but again i think that goes back i i don't you should never drive over the speed limit i don't think i think having a defensive lineman going fast is one thing having a quarterback going fast that's another you gotta take that position by position 186 and a 60 uh it was school zone no what is that lebron school that doesn't exist school right next to the highway you guys i just remember i saw your tweet i was like holy shit what did deshaun watson do and then the more i read it i was like there's gotta be i'm not saying it's crazy i'm just saying that he like 24 hours later he's just adding another thing i'm not saying it's crazy i'm just saying that he like 24 hours later he's just adding another thing not a good guy maybe starting to think he might not be a good guy so you're saying if you go 86 and 60 you're a bad guy i didn't say that i said i'm starting to think he's not a good guy it is a bad guy they say he was a bad guy i mean he is i'm gonna start i'm gonna start keeping track of all driving infractions okay i did he is a bad guy bad guy this isn't a good example of that no but it's when you have the other stuff you add it on regular citizen going 86 and 60 it's like it's like this is the final straw yeah right i put up with a lot deshaun yeah and you know the small stuff adds up to correct correct uh i think the jaguars are not getting any respect or talked about a lot i think they're gonna be really good this year they could win the south i think trevor lawrence is gonna like it's gonna keep going forward also if you saw if you're a conspiracy theorist the super bowl graphic trevor lawrence was closest to the super bowl graphic and he's gonna be the closest to the super bowl to the color of the the green type thing yeah yeah this is so uh these two teams you might not remember too much about the jaguars and the browns playing against each other but that is the bottle gate game yeah 2001 it was the uh jaguars they won 15 to 10 and uh every browns fan threw thousands of plastic bottles onto the field and that's why scumbags that's why i had uh at nfl games we're not allowed to have the bottle caps on our bottles anymore did it again hank just did it again what was that look he stared at you i looked over you were talking what do you mean i was talking i was not talking you just like in the middle of when they were saying you just looked over so slowly and gave me the most menacing look why did you do that we have to get menacing i laughed so hard watching that clip again where max is like i'm not gonna fucking back down we gotta get the divider you guys aren't allowed to look at each other during the show i just don't know why we put a cone on on hank it's bad yeah why did you do that hank show me the look what was it about the the bottle story that told you this is a good time i over at this is crazy that i have to do like the like max's max is just not locked in because and you were talking you were saying something when i looked over me talking about going 100 going 100 miles an hour i like to go fast okay uh sometimes pft says something that make me laugh and i look over to see if i'm like my and pft was like oh i remember is the bottle gate game from 2001 and i was like well we're not 100 years old so i looked over to you max was thinking the same thing and then he was like you gave me the meanest look of all time it's like all right no you guys gotta lock in we gotta lock in we gotta lock the bottle gate game is actually it's a big moment you know i know nothing about it it's an american history no because max you're not allowed to have bottles just the way you said it was funny where you're like oh i don't remember the bottle yeah you've always wondered how come they won't give me the tops on my fucking bottle when i get out of the concert yeah scumbag cleveland pieces of shit grounds jaguars game from 25 years ago that's why honestly yeah yeah no you're right that's on me lock in but also lock in lock in oh if this if that happened in philly they would have built statues of the people throwing the bottles that's that's for sure yeah that makes no sense yeah continue they would have been throwing my kids yeah or santa hmm that would have made more sense throwing my kids no of pft saying oh if you know you would have been but to statue you didn't say anything i said if that happened in philly they would have they would have plotted it like hey look at us we made the rule no actually that's that i'm gonna side with max that's very wrong pft because they only make statues of fictional characters that's true yeah so this actually happened yeah it's a metaphor so if this happened in draft day in the movie and then they make a statue of all the fans throwing bottles this is rivalry week between you two it's gotta gotta amp it up grudge match gotta amp it up it's too early for this it's too that you wish you're playing the panthers at noon max is gonna stay nice and calm love to be playing i can't wait to see how calm you are on sunday i'm not gonna be calm i never said i was gonna be calm okay back to the afternoon sorry for that brief uh jaguars grounds got a little heated there packers at vikings vikings minus one and a half over under is 46 and a half what do you guys think kyler murray do we think he's going to be this is it for kyler right yeah like he's got to be good i mean to unpack the analogy a little bit more some people are foster parents for dogs some people are are adoptive forever homes for dogs and i think that the viking i think koc is good at taking dogs rehoming them might have grown up in a bad environment quarterbacks that might have had a bad experience teaching them hey this is how you go to the bathroom in the house this is how we eat calmly this is where we sleep at night in our crate this is how we walk on a leash teaches them how to be good quarterbacks so the next place that they go they're awesome yeah i don't know that he's great at solving the problem he's great at solving the problem he's great at solving the problem he's great at selecting his own purebred quarterback right like he did with jj i think that this is a great spot it it's good it's a perfect spot for kyler murray i don't know that it's a perfect spot for the vikings to be in yeah um but i think that he's going to get the absolute best out of kyler murray that he possibly can at this point which i think should be good enough to be a pretty good team this year yeah i mean listen you also like there's two parts of the game there are two sides of the ball like brian flores against the packers offensive line that is maybe going to be the weaker part of their team that will be interesting who's going to step up and be the packers like best receiver is gonna be matthew golden is gonna be christian watson i don't know josh jacobs isn't playing so this might be the good time to get him you know like this might be the time tucker craft is is is back michael parsons not going to be back for another four weeks like this is the time if you're kyler murray and this vikings team to play the packers harrison smith back harrison smith back year 15 yeah he just decided i think that it was a plan all along. He's like, I don't want to do training camp in preseason. I'll just come back. Yeah. He's probably earned that at this point. Hmm. Okay. What do we got? Anything else in this game? Overs 21 and four for the Packers when played as I don't like that stat. Cancel that stat. Matt LaFleur 17 and four against the spread first three games of the season. That's a good stat. Comes out strong. This would be a good game. Very good game. Yeah. And Kyler's going to look so small. Yeah. Tiny, tiny, tiny Kyler. I went back to how we reacted when we first saw Kirk Cousins. Yeah. In the Vikings uniform. We thought he looked small in the Vikings uniforms. Kyler is going to look itty bitty. He's going to look so cute. I would love to see Kyler wearing a guardian cap, big purple helmet, tiny little purple uniform. It'd be adorable. Yeah. What do you think, Hank? I think he'll be cute. I think he's going to be good. I think he's going to be good-ish. I think. Which could be good enough. Yeah. That's kind of where I'm at. Good-ish could be good enough for this Vikings team. Is there any. Oh, when GTA comes out, though, that's when you flip on the Vikings. Yeah. I feel like Kyler's going to be. Well, it's never coming out. Is he a GTA guy? He's got to be, right? Like a gamer of his level. His everything. No matter what he likes to play, he has to. Everyone's a GTA guy. Give yourself two weeks for GTA. Well, unless you like playing video games that are out. Yeah, but everyone. Everyone that. Yeah. Everyone played GTA in their life. When's it coming out? It got pushed again. Yeah, it pushed it again. Again? Yeah, it had some. Wait, was that a recent push? Recent push. How recent? They got guys who used to work on the dev team coming out and being like, hey, it's not coming out when you think it is. They also had a guy holding the game for ransom. Did you hear about that? Yeah. That was kind of wild. Do you think there is anyone on. Is it a situation where we're getting close enough that there could be a kid whose parent worked on it? And now the kid is like old enough to work on it? It's like. How long has it been? GTA 5. It's been more than like a decade. Okay. Yeah, so maybe. So yeah, we're getting kind of close. And there's like no incentive for them to really even drop it because every year is GTA's highest grossing year. Yeah. Since launch. Which is crazy. Unreal. But yeah, I feel like whenever that comes out, pencil Kyler in for a down week. Yeah, I'd agree. Okay, before we get to Commander's Eagles, we've got a special delivery from King's Wines, Chef Greg here. Here we go. Greg, thank you. What do you got for us here? Talk to the mic and tell me. You're talking to Hank's mic. Talking to Hank's mic? Yeah, Hank's mic. I'll take this. So what I just handed you is our take on a Chicago Italian beef, number 34. Love it. A little bit of sweet Italian for Walter's sweetness, Peyton. And then. Love that. For the Commander's, a hog slider. You got five pork deli meats. For the linemen that did Joe Gibbs proud. Love it. Thank you, Chef Greg. He said five different pork deli meats for the hogs. We're eating major tutty today. And I got a lobster. I got lobster rolls. You got lobster rolls? All right. These are incredible. So King's Wine is making the claim that they are the best slider in football, but Eli isn't buying it. In fact, he's setting out on a full-blown mission to prove that he is the real best slider in the sport, no matter how hard he tries. Eli can't outrun the undeniable truth. King's Wine will always be the best slider in the sport. Whether it's at the stadium, the tailgate, or at home, no football-watching experience is complete without King's Hawaiian sliders. Chef Greg hooked us up here. King's Hawaiian sliders are undefeated on game day. For more information about King's Hawaiian products and details on where to purchase them, visit www.kingshawaiian.com. This is the best lobster roll I've ever had. Did it again, Chef Greg. This is really good. I got roast pork sliders back here with broccoli and bacon. I got broccoli rabe and some sharp provolone. Really good. This is absolutely delicious. Oh, this beef is so good. I love any deli sandwich that's got all the Italian meats on it that says all of them. And nice little hibiscus flowers on the side here. You know what this is, BFT? Dude, it's so good. You thinking what I'm thinking? This is out of bounds. It's out of bounds. Out of bounds. I know an Italian that would love yours, BFT. Yes. Who? It relates to this game. Yeah. Big Dom. Mm. Mm-hmm. All right. Well, thank you to King's Hawaiian. King's Hawaiian, incredible sponsor. We're going to be doing more stuff with them all football season. Go get them today. They're the best. The absolute best. And get some sliders. Chef Greg makes us some incredible sliders. Okay. Game of the week. Commanders versus Eagles, boys. Yeah. How are you feeling? Are we feeling good? I'm feeling great about it. I can't wait to watch my favorite team play football on Sunday. Commanders fans are going to take over the hard rock in Philadelphia again. We got to. Hell yeah. You got to storm it and take that shit over. That worked well the last time. You got to take it. Well, there were some fumbles. Yeah. There was a fumble that changed everything. Three fumbles. Take over the hard rock and then stop fumbling. Those are my two big keys to the game. What are. All right. So I'll start with you, PFT. What are you expecting in terms of this game? Like, if you don't win, what are you looking for? I'm looking for everybody to be healthy. Okay. And I'm looking for it to be a competitive game. Okay. That's what I'm looking for. Really, it's. I don't know what to expect out of either offense because we don't. Mannion and Blau. Yeah. It's like, who's. We can expect these guys to be going head-to-head for the next 20, 30 years. And this is just going to kind of set the tone for it. Yeah. I agree. Max, you? Um. Win? I'm going to say right now, I'm not going to overreact to anything on Sunday, but I will overreact big time if they lose this game, especially if the offense looks bad. Okay. If they lose and, like, the defense doesn't look great, and the offense looks really good, I would be better with that loss because it's like, okay, I think the defense. Like, there's enough talent on the defense. Vic Fangio has earned our trust. Like, they'll figure it out. If the offense comes out and looks like it did against, you know, maybe the Bears game last year, that'll be a huge red flag, and I will be overreacting. Okay. What do you think? Is there any distraction in this game because of. Because of that rat snitch, Emmanuel Acho, who, again, we. The Giants are the team that. I thought we were going to do the Giants preview later. Yeah, that's true. Any. No, we're focused on football. The NFL is investigating Big Dom. Emmanuel Acho is an absolute loser who goes to the teacher at the end of class and be like, hey, you didn't give us any homework. Mm-hmm. Like, sorry, he. Allegedly, if this is all true, he's probably lying anyway, and it's probably not even Big Dom, but why would you be mad about a guy who helped you out? Yeah, I think. It makes no fucking sense. Why would you rat out a guy who helped you out? Max, I'm going to just give you. Allegedly, if that's true. I'm going to give you some advice. The line from you should just be, he's a liar. Yeah. He's a liar. And he's a liar. Because he is a liar. There you go. And it's also a fucking fender bet. Like, who gives a. See, now you keep talking. He's a liar. As your attorney, if I was your lawyer, I'd punch you in the face right now. Oh, yeah. Just shut up. I'd put you in a Hannibal Lecter mask. He's a lawyer. And he's a liar. Shut the fuck up Friday. Which is not the issue. Oh. What's the issue? What's the issue, Hank? Falsifying police reports. Sounds like you're siding with Emmanuel Ochoa. Yeah. Sounds like you're a loser. Are you a loser, Hank? I believe Emmanuel Ochoa's a liar. I'm just pointing out, like, Max saying, it's a fender bender. Who cares? If it were true, which I don't think it is, I think Big Dom's a stand-up guy. Also, I don't think Emmanuel Ochoa was ever good enough for Team Security to step in and falsify a police report for. That's true. If you. If you have that position, you save that for people that actually contribute to winning. Mm-hmm. Emmanuel Ochoa, he just wants his. He's the worst. He just wants people to start. Keep talking about fucking Emmanuel Ochoa. Yeah. And we're not going to talk at all about fucking Emmanuel Ochoa. Never. Yeah, and it never even happened. Right. And he's a liar. And he's a liar. Okay. And if it did happen, it's a fender bender. No, it didn't even happen. I don't even know why I entertained the idea if it did happen. But regardless. It didn't happen. Right. Okay. So, realistically, I am looking for the offense to look good. I think that it might look really good. I think Jaden Daniels, he's as healthy as he's been since the start of last season. And he did have a few good games last year when he was healthy. I think that he's going to remind a lot of people who he is. Yeah. That's what I think. I think the bad man might be back. I think that he probably doesn't even have the internet. So, I don't know that he's even experienced what the last couple weeks have been like with people making fun of number five. Why doesn't he have the internet? He seems like a guy that just doesn't go online. You think his mom says no screens in the house? I think she has the internet for him. That's pretty good. I think that he tries to log on and she's on the phone. Yeah. And she's like, sorry, Jaden, you can't log on. I'm talking. What's the deal with the offensive line? How's that situation looking? Great question, Max. Thanks for asking that question. It's a fine offensive line. All this shit, I got so triggered yesterday. That these motherfuckers at NFL.com, and you're not supposed to get upset about power. Yeah. Power rankings. Yeah. I got very upset about power rankings. They had the fucking commanders second to last in the NFL because of one tweet about one bad practice that Hank amplified on a national sports podcast. It was one bad practice. And Hank, I told you at the time, and you didn't clarify your report. It was just about all back up. Not my report. It is your fault, Hank. No, you reported on the podcast. Therefore, it becomes your report. I read the tweet as was written. Minus context. text. I read the tweet as it You omitted the context that it was a backup offensive line featuring even some third-stringers. That should have been said in the tweet, and I would have read that. I tried to inform you of the context. Hank declined to apply the context. So on the podcast, the context was there. So the people writing this report heard the context. But Hank, you know how many Hank stans there are out there. They only listen to what you say. Yeah. Hank, you did this. So you're saying the people at NFL.com heard the report only on this podcast and ignored the context that you provided. Yes. And it's my fault for reading a tweet as written. Yes, you are the media. You have a bigger responsibility than that. There's a lot of people out there that listen to this show. I'm not a journalist. Well, I think some people would disagree with that. Who? The people at NFL.com that used you as a source. You seem like a journalist. The entire explanation for ranking them 31st was because of a bad practice. Yeah, and that you spread. That Hank spread. That then was followed up by a bad preseason game. Not even talking about a regular season. We're talking. about a preseason game in that game 40 of the best players didn't even play and that's the reason why the commanders are the second worst team in the nfl i think that there are they're going to surprise some people i think the offense is going to be back and really really good i think that the defense might confuse some people because we've got a new defensive coordinator that seems like the new exotica king you're gonna have here's my prediction you're gonna have guys coming from directions that you didn't think guys could come from oh like he is going to load up that box it's going to be crazy they're coming from everywhere it's where are they coming from all different left right middle every time you turn your head there's a guy coming and it's going to be you're going to say please stop yeah i need to stop time out too many guys are coming at me so you're telling me on sunday i'm going to be like these guys got to stop coming yeah yeah you're gonna have to take off your glasses because they're going to come then so i'm going to be watching this game i'm going to be like these guys are coming everywhere i'm drowning i'm drowning in what come no no no no guys what are you talking about guys i'm talking about my bad my bad i'm talking about blitzes yeah blitzes i'm talking about sending guys from different angles right getting in the box sticking your nose and they're going to come from behind they're going to come from in front penetrate behind yeah yeah yeah oh yeah penetration like you've never imagined jalen hurts turns his back oh they're guys gonna be guys yeah that's it that's it he shows his ass guy coming i do i do think that there's gonna be a lot of guys coming i do yeah because dorante jones he seems like maybe the next iteration of dr heat maybe maybe even a mad scientist type defensive coordinator yeah uh so i'm looking forward to what he's going to do with that because this is a defense that uh is not going to be one of the best in the league but maybe we can thrive on turnovers and guys coming and guys coming from directions that you don't expect if you lead the league and guys coming you will definitely you'll at least you'll at least announce your presence yeah yeah it's hard to yeah it's hard to ignore that yeah right uh so yeah i i do think that the defense is won't be as good as the offense but i think it could be serviceable uh and it's like the it's a hallmark of a coach that's really desperate to change something up switching from like a four three to a three four because they did a whole off season of study and you realize you might get more turnovers yeah and a three four we've heard a lot of football guys kind of go down that road before and that's kind of what dan quinn's trying to do with the defense this year it was terrible historically bad last year uh and i think that's i think if we had a average defense last year and jayden was healthy it would have been a perfectly average team uh instead it was the doomsday scenario which i don't think that we're going to get two years in a row and i think jayden's healthy and i think he's going to remind a lot of people that the bad man's still here and also a little fun stat he's the bad man the bad man okay in this in this monologue that i'm giving trying to pump myself up for the season he's he's a bad man um the last time we had a rematch a super bowl rematch in week one and we had a rematch dan quinn took a team to the super bowl as head coach oh and we have a super bowl rematch because that already happened because that already happened right so if if that if that holds if that pattern holds then yeah look for the commanders in the super bowl this year don't ask what happened in the super bowl right but still but still he got there so that's that's where i'm at um now i'm excited to watch with you guys in reality the eagles are probably going to win 35 to 10 no don't say that that's just kind of what happens and the eagles jalen hurts especially great week one quarterback eagles are a good week one team um but we got to see it's brand new offense could take a little bit to you know get situated yeah yeah i couldn't think of the right word but whatever it's fine that was close enough the penn state all-time leading rusher is going up against taekwon barkley this weekend pretty cool that is pretty cool yeah that's correct yeah all right uh last sunday afternoon game cardinals and chargers all i got for this is jim harbaugh's quote which was so fucking awesome he said it's september it's time to play our first game and i support no cause foreign or domestic other than the greatness of the los angeles chargers yep that is yes that is harbaugh's annual quote that he's given probably going back to when he was in san diego yep um but he he looks at a football team as a sovereign country as a nation of its own and he is their leader and he takes an annual oath of office every summer before it starts we're talking to sam schwartzen about this a while ago that's like his favorite thing to say yeah is foreign and domestic yes uh this is a must win for the chargers do we all agree you got to win this game yep yes have to win this game yep have to win this game uh i'm excited to see mike mcdaniel how that looks with justin herbert and that offense jim harbaugh did say that uh mike patino reminds him of a young jimmy harbaugh how about that yeah he carries around a pencil when he's around mcdaniel yeah just to write down his quotes yeah and then they followed up and asked did you ever dress like mike mcdaniel he said no i think that's probably fair to say it's absolutely fair to say uh jeremiah loves uh q uh rb2 which i don't think matters i think michael for even said like don't even look into that i think he's gonna i think they're it seems like the cardinals are going to try to use jeremiah love a good amount but not too much because why would you waste him in a year that probably is not going to end up in the playoffs so get him ready and we'll see you ready get get him going but don't don't have him be like uh 250 carry guy yeah this is it is though a must win for the chargers 100 without a doubt you have to win this game um i asked blutman liam blutman if he had any fun facts about any players because he just remembers everything that's ever been said about any player on any college broadcast ever uh in this game he said diane henley's dad is eugene big u henley who was the leader of the rolling 60s crips that's pretty cool so that's pretty cool that's his fun fact of the day that is very cool uh all right should we do sunday night football and then we'll do some picks so sunday night football cowboys at giants giants plus three over under 48 and a half this is hungry dog you said dac does own the the giants it feels like doesn't it he's uh i saw the stat this is actually the 13th time that the cowboys will begin a game again uh the season with the giants they are 11 and 1 and they're going to be the first to win the game and they're going to be the first to in the previous 12 games and dac uh in his career against nfc east foes is 37 and 10 straight up so he's good against all the nfc he is yeah east do you know do you know how long it's been since the giants have scored a touchdown in a week one game three years it's been four years four years it's been four years damn uh so 2022 i guess four years as of right now but just it would be just barely over four years if and when they do score their first touchdown okay so we're looking for a giant's touchdown we're gonna get one we're definitely going to get one this week obj yeah the catch rematch uh rematch he looks great how many times are you going to show that catch at least once has to be i was in the car for that catch i don't remember where i was going but i was listening to it on radio how did they describe it they were just like oh my god i can't i just remember like them getting home being like oh shit that was a sick catch if that catch happened right now how how much attention do you think it would get a lot a lot of the same amount yeah as did before i don't remember is that catch was it incomplete no it was it was it was an and one yeah it was because he got it yeah i'm just thinking that because we've gotten kind of desensitized to one-handed catches and there's been a lot of yeah like really incredible catches that catch we talked about that catch for like a week non-stop i think yeah it was the number one topic was sunday night football that was why i feel like yeah yeah um okay should we do our picks and we also have to do our parlay right so draft kings draft kings the weight is over football's here no and so is draft kings draft kings sports app is now live in all 50 states that means from texas to california to florida every fan is in on the excitement and this september draft kings is giving customers the boosted every football game day that's right every game day 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Event contract trading involves risk of loss. Predictions offer void in New York. Non-withdrawable rewards issued as $50 click the claims every seven days for 21 days. One single use boost per customer per day. Expires at the end of the final select game when offered. Valid for select football transactions on the platform for which it's been issued. Terms at DKNG.co slash offer. Limited time offer. Nationwide based on sportsbook predictions and free-to-play sports contest availability. Varies by state. Limited time offer. Touchdown parlay. Let's do that first. So me, Hank, PFT. If someone doesn't get it, they're subbed out and Max is subbed in. Hank? I was going to take Jeremiah Love until you just talked about it and now I'm scared. I'm going to go Devonta Smith. Okay. Devonta Smith. PFT. I'm going to go Aaron Jones. Aaron Jones. Yeah. Okay. Do you guys want to get a little crazy or no? Do you want to get a little crazy? Get a little crazy. All right. It's not that crazy. With Brock Bowers out, I'm going to go Michael Mayer. Okay. Yeah. So those are all afternoon. Wait, do we have a night game? Shit. We don't have a Sunday night. $10 pays $242.76 for that parlay. Whoa. Whoa. Should we do our picks? What are we going to do for punishment? Do we have any ideas? We can always decide a little bit later. We could always run back, drive to LA. Drive to LA was kind of fun last time. Yeah. Except for the night in Memphis. That was bad. We could also rollerblade to San Diego. That was my idea. Mine was also something with rollerblading. Okay. Just rollerblade week. Only roller. Get around on blades. Yeah. Oh, man. That sounds kind of cool. I said to memes that for the entire off season, the loser has to muck bang every time they get fast food. Make a video of yourself muck banging. What is muck banging again? It's literally just eating a meal and then describing what you're eating. And you place it out in front of you. You've seen them. You put it in front of you and you're like, I'm going to eat the fries now. These are fries from McDonald's. That's crispy fries. Got it. Wow. Shock o'clock. So every time you get fast food, got to make a video. Okay. What about a bobblehead week? You just wear a helmet and a guardian cab all week. I like that. Not a bad idea. I thought of a chain together scavenger hunt. Oh, so second place and last place goes on. We, the four winners give clues to people. Let's say Jerry O'Connell. You have to find Jerry O'Connell in LA. He has a key. He gives you the key and a clue to the next key. And then so on and so forth. I was thinking, what about, uh, who, you know, depending on who it is, they have to, and maybe like get, you can get like prosthetic makeup to a celebrity that they look the most like, and then go walk around the Hollywood walk of fame for like three hours and take pictures with people. Okay. Okay. What about losers or loser in second place has to fix Jerry O'Connell's driveway? That's not a bad, I was going to say the actual, like you have to get cement and like mix it. I was going to say loser stay at Jerry O'Connell's house, but also fix his driveway. Yeah. I feel like fixing the driveway. Oh, it's doable. It's definitely already fixed. Okay. Then maybe you have to, you have to break it. You have to break it and then fix it and then refix it. Yeah. I like that. Okay. The second place person gets to, has to break it. The last place person has to fix. What about the second? What about the last place person has to fix Jerry O'Connell's driveway? While the second place person has to swim. Can't put their feet on the bottom of this pool. I would much over. I would, I would die. Yeah. Tread water. That'd be hours. Yeah. Water. No, I don't think that's possible. I kind of like the idea of, of maybe a sleepover and fixing. Don't sleep over. Dom just said, drive the OJ pursuit, uh, drive the OJ pursuit route in Vanny. Same speed. That's not driving, isn't it? Yeah, but that's going pretty slow. Slow. If the Broncos are in the Superbowl, then maybe. Yeah. I don't like that. Did Dom have to mansplain something to you? Uh, he was like, can I explain why I said that? I said no. And then he just proceeded being the, the shut the fuck up bitch. And then he just proceeded to explain it while I was standing there. And I was like, I thought it was pretty good. I don't have to explain the explanation. It was, it was like Hank was being a bitch and he, I wanted to tell him to shut up. Oh, okay. Oh, by the way, I have breaking moose. I can report, uh, that that was the first zoo Jared Goff had been to as an adult. He said over 20 years. Crazy. So that was why he was just like, whoa, this is crazy. That is kind of animals everywhere. Said it rock though. Said it was awesome time. He said it was a good zoo. That let that be a lesson. Zoos are for adults too. Yeah. I guess that makes sense. Like you probably have a pretty big gap in going to a zoo between being a kid and maybe having a kid that it's like, I didn't go to a zoo. I've been to one zoo as an adult. Was it fun? Great time. Yeah. Zoos are awesome. You want to know where it was? Where California, San Diego, San Diego. Well, okay. So you didn't, you, you buried the lead there. I said, I, I specifically said San Diego zoo, take that out. You live like a half mile from the Chicago zoo. Never been there. Never been. And actually I've walked or I've, yeah, I've never gone inside of the, the grounds of it. I've, I've seen some of the animals walking through the park though. You've stalked the perimeter. Yeah. On, if you walk around the perimeter, you can see some of them. So you're like, oh, I'm getting some free looks at these animals, even though the zoo itself is free. Well, I just haven't like gone through the effort of going into the free. Yeah. Cause that's, that's how they get you. Yeah. Once you get inside, then nothing is ever free. You have popcorn pretzels, everything. Saw pretzels. Yeah. Really good ones. Airbrush t-shirts. Really good. A little choo-choo train that you get to drive around aren't as big here as whatever. It's fine. Okay. Uh, uh, some also additional clarification on the Falcon Steelers game to, uh, has hurt his back. Oh no. So there was a report that he grabbed his back and then sat down on the grass at practice. Doesn't sound good. Cooper rush, I think took every snap of the ones. So we're not, we might get Cooper rush. We might get Cooper rush. Against the Steelers this weekend. And if so, maybe a good move by Tua. Yeah. After being, you know, threatened with his job. He's like, fine, I won't play for bad performance. He's like, fine. Maybe, maybe I'm just hurt. Yeah. And so fuck you pay me. Smart move. Yep. All right. Picks. Everyone's got to pick a spread in an over under two picks aside. Uh, let's start with memes. So we'll just go in order from that way. Memes. I will go with Pittsburgh Steelers minus three and a half. Hmm. Hmm. That feels like that was way up for you. The Tua news. Although I think you'd rather have to a start. Yeah, for sure. If you bet Steelers, you'd rather have to a start. No. Yep. That's what I was thinking. Yeah. Now Cooper rush stinks too. He had that one game, dude. Watermelon game. That was the watermelon. It was 10 years ago. It was not 10 years ago. Yeah. No. Cooper rush doesn't stink. All right. Eight years ago. I don't know how many years ago it was. Don't ask me about the years. All right, Max. I'm going with the jets plus one and a half. Jets plus one and a half. Okay. I'm going to go with the Ravens minus three and a half. Okay. PFT. I am going to go with I'm going to go with the Houston Texans plus one and a half. Hmm. I'm going to take, is it, what's the line right now on? I'm seeing conflicting lines. I want to make sure I'm exactly right. I would take Cowboys minus three and take the Browns plus eight and a half. Ooh. And stinky. And, and I'm going to take the under in the Cowboys giants, 48 and a half. Okay. I'm going to take the stinkiest one. Tune into Barstool Sports Advisors back Friday. Dolphins Raiders over 40 and a half. Yeah. Gross, right? Yeah. You like that? You like how gross I got? Oh, no. Yeah. I got dirty. Yeah. Where are those points? What are you looking at me like that for memes? That's a terrible over. Yeah. Yeah. That's why I like it. That reaction is why I like it. No business going over. Yeah. No business. Team stink. I'm going to take the under in Chargers Cardinals, 47 and a half. I like that. I'm going to take the over in the Jets Titans, 38 and a half. Ooh, you're getting stinky with me. Stinky. That's not stinky. Those are just two high powered offenses. We're bigger on teams. Max. Okay. Um, I'll be taking the over, uh, 46 and a half bears Panthers. I like it. I know. I have to stall. Okay. Cause I wanted the Jets times over. Oh, that's all. Also, a jet sternum is stalling. You don't want to do that. It's a little aviation humor. Try to keep up, memes. The Buffalo Bills, Houston Texans. Over 44 and a half. All right. We're off and running, boys. We're off and running. Can't wait. Let's get to our interview with Scott Hanson. He jacks us up for some football. Gets us so excited. PFT, before we do that, you got a quick ad? Before we get to our good friend, Scott Hanson. He's brought to you by Chevy. We love Chevy here on Part of My Take. They are the fullback of trucks. They're the official truck sponsor of Part of My Take. They're the truck that got us to and fro the Super Bowl in Los Angeles last time it was there. They got best-in-class standard torque, most functional bed, and advanced tech. It's football guy approved. So, whether you're grinding through the week or if you're gearing up for kickoff, there's one ride that's always game ready. That is the Chevy Silverado. Silverado keeps that heartbeat strong. It is the heartbeat of America. So, if you're towing, if you're hauling, if you're tailgating, Silverado will let you show up strong and tackle any task. Check out the current offers on the 2026 Silverado at Chevy.com. That is Chevy.com, the heartbeat of America. Chevrolet. And now, here is Scott Hanson. Okay, we now welcome on a very, very special guest. We are so excited for football to be back. It is host of Red Zone, Scott Hanson, the man. He's here with Lowe's, which I walked into the office, I think it was yesterday, Scott. And I just saw on the ground, I was like, oh, there's a Lowe's Chicago Bears toolbox for me. I'm not a tool guy, but now I might have to be. Dude, it's a receptacle. Find something to do with it, even if it's not a wrench. Yes. These things are awesome. First of all. First of all, Big Cat and PFT, it is great to be back with you boys. It's been several years, I believe, since we've been reunited. Happy New Year to one and all. Yeah, let me talk about Lowe's real quick, and then we're going to get into all the football, I'm sure. So, yeah, I'm partnered with Lowe's again this year, and Lowe's has their Earn Your Sunday campaign. The concept is this. We all got stuff around the house we got to do, whether it's a tiny little project or a massive renovation. Well, the concept is you go to Lowe's. During the weekday, you get your tools, you get your supplies, you get everything taken care of on Thursday, Friday, Saturday, so that you have earned your Sunday and can plop your butt on the couch to watch TV for, let's just say, seven hours of a Red Zone Sunday, and you have earned your Sunday. And Lowe's has partnered with some of the biggest names in the game to get that messaging out there. Dak Prescott, Christian McCaffrey, Justin Jefferson, Jordan Lowe. And Lowe is new this year, and new this year, a rookie on the Lowe's home team, one of the greatest defenders of his generation, Miles Garrett, will be featured in some of the marketing stuff. So, yeah, it's going to be a fun campaign. And beyond that, you just said it, Big Cat, the toolboxes. Check out this. The folks at Lowe's, honestly, the folks at Lowe's love football the way you guys and I love football. So, they want fans to all, you know, to get into the space. spirit and whatnot they partner with cobalt to make these mini nfl toolboxes it's a steel toolbox just the way you would have in your shop or garage or your basement or whatever all 32 teams available courtesy of lowes you go to lowes.com and check those out all right so scott i love it i and you're exactly right like there's always uh some things you got to take care of on sunday morning before you get and sit on the couch all day what's your sunday morning look like because you're you're west coast time right so correct what time are you waking up on sunday before we we just rip some red zone all day yeah so the problem with me is i get so worked up and you guys know my energy i can't go to sleep on saturday night the night that i need the most rest i can't do it i've been studying nfl facts for an entire week all day on saturday i've got for those watching and not just listening i've got my media wall over here i'm grinding on five college games hell yeah all every three hours i got the best five college games on i got my computers going on getting all my notes so i can't go to sleep on sunday i get to sleep maybe around midnight maybe one o'clock the alarm is set for 4 30 a.m pacific time i'm in los angeles 4 30 a.m pacific time i usually my body wakes me up around four o'clock 4 15 i don't even need the alarm jump into the shower i don't drink coffee this energy is natural don't need the caffeine head into the studio i like to be the first one in there a little after 5 a.m i get the same salty dense protein breakfast from the chefs at the network so i can retain water so i can famously not go to the bathroom for seven straight hours we have a production meeting we go over the last little things we rehearse the top of the show right before and then you guys watch red zone you know the countdown clock that we start like 15 minutes before the show with the nfl films music yep when you're watching the countdown clock uncle scott's in the men's room going for the final time shutting it down and then it's the willpower of a ninja and focus on the touchdowns for seven straight hours that's uh it's my favorite time of the week when i see that clock the red zone clock for the first time in a year i can't even describe the feeling that it that it puts to me just excitement is an understatement at that point and then after the games can i can i ask you something i gotta ask you a question sure put you on the spot do you remember the first time i was ever on your show i do yeah do you remember the first question you ever asked me i don't know big cat you remember what pft i would imagine is do you ever do you ever pissed during the during an nfl sunday no you guys were so keyed up about red zone and the greatness of it remember the verbiage because i now have the best answer it stunned me at the time shocker that pft stunned me the first thing you ever asked me was scott when when you went to the octobox for the first time did it move yeah it moves and i'm like what do you mean did it move me emotionally did it move me yeah i was a little slow on the uptake but after all these years i have an answer for you pft it moved so much it needed to fill out a change of address form it's the best it's so exciting it does move and then when it's all over i gotta take a nap it's it's yeah you know there's a lot of similarities there at the end of it when the day is over do you just crash do you do is it just you hit a wall or do you have to wind down dude i'm i'm a nut job so i i i finish my bladder is so well trained when i finish the touchdown montage right the music video with all 60 whatever touchdowns on it i pop my earpiece i take the microphone off i don't even have to go to the bathroom then i go take my makeup off get out of my suit jump in the car drive back home here to my place in la and put on sunday night football but then so i got five tvs sunday night football on in the big screen that's a 70 incher these are 50 inchers flanking here i'll put nfl network highlights show on there espn's highlights over here over on the far screens i'll have news and then like a movie marvel movie or a star wars movie on mute that i've already seen before and i can still have all of that stimulation and that's how i unwind yeah after it's more tv yeah yeah i love it that's a perfect sunday that's undoubtedly why i'm single and no one will ever have me that's there listen that's a perfect sunday that you just described i also it's dawning on me now you might be the only person and correct me if i'm wrong who isn't upset when they do i because we we gripe about this all the time when the nfl does a schedule where it's like eight games early three games late that's probably good for you to be able to to pace the day i hate it i think it always leaves us wanting more in the afternoon and if one if one or two of those games a blowout we're just stuck in the middle of the night and then we're like oh my god i'm gonna be like oh my with it that's where you come in and you can you can get us back and forth but i do you like that or would you like there to be more even on a sunday yeah so uh i reached over here because i just grabbed something to show your audience here uh when the schedule release comes out i always say this all politics and schedule releases are local right the coaches look for who do we play week one right the players look for the bye week or cold weather or something like that and they're like oh my god i'm gonna be like oh my god games in december right the red zone host looks for oh you have it the splits yeah oh so we've got all week uh week one early window is eight late window is four i literally make this on the day the schedule gets released and obviously we got some planks because the flexes and stuff that happened in mid to late december there but that's that's how i look at the schedule and um four games is fine it's fine three feels slow two is death death yes okay so you agree with us so all right so that's good like i see the seven three sundays and i'm like man i wish we had an extra game there because you just run the risk of like if one of these games is a blowout yeah And it always, to us, our Sundays are similar to yours where we all come in and we're in the office and we have all the games on, and it's like the anticipation and excitement when the first games kick off and you ride that wave and then you crash a little bit at the end of the witching hour. And then the Cardinals come on. Yeah, and then the Cardinals are getting 20-pieced and the Seahawks are beating up on someone and you're like, man, I want another game. I stand up for the entire early window. You know when that crash hits when you're on the couch maybe catching some Zs or whatever and maybe some of the higher-profile teams are playing in that late window? I sit down for the first time. And when I sit down, the energy kind of changes in the studio, I think, a little bit. I mean, we ride it as best we can, but that train's down the tracks, guys. I'm sure you've explained to your audience why it's that way because people tell me, you've got 12 games on Red Zone week one. Why isn't it 6-6? Let me just explain it if the audience doesn't know it. Please do. The reason is because the NFL wants a pseudo-national game in the late window. We all notice that the game in a three-game late window in the middle of October is going to feature, I don't want to name teams that are lower. Well, it's going to feature low-profile team in a smaller market versus low-profiler team in a smaller market. Same, same. And then Giants-Cowboys. Right. Bills-Chiefs, right? With Romo and Nance, or Nance or Romo or whoever is broadcasting that. Kind of stepped on that one a little bit. You know, the national game. And they want to deliver one huge audience to a large swath of the country for their partnership with CBS and Fox. So that's why there is, lesser inventory in the late window. Yeah, it makes sense. We're still going to complain about it when it's on because we just want more football. And also my dream would be to have a slightly staggered start times like college football where it was, we had, we're in central time in Chicago, like a noon kickoff, a 1.30 kickoff. So you like, you never stop, you know, like there will always be that random time where one of the games are going to overtime or a weather delay and you'll, you'll get that like bonus game in the afternoon. It's like, oh, this game's still going on. I love it. So I wish we were a little more staggered. Well, they did create the Sunday morning specials for us. Here is the entire NFL schedule. Oh, look at this. In, in grid form, the white and black rectangles are red zone games. That's Sunday, one o'clock, four o'clock. Any color on there is a standalone national game or, an international location broadcast. So that's a visual representation of what it, what it looks like. Did you make that yourself or did you have somebody print that up for you? One of the great chaps at NFL media research kind of puts that out for us. I'll send an image online or send it to you if you like. I love it. Yeah. I laminate mine because, you know, I live by it for the next five months. It's great. Yeah. We got a guy like that here at Jeff D low. He, he puts everything in grid format, laminates everything. That's how he does it. He keeps track of everything. I think you and him will get along really well. I want to go into something that I hear all the time about you, which is like, all right, just in general, there should be a red zone for blank. It's almost like you can take any sport and people are like, oh, there should be a red zone for hockey. There should be a red zone for baseball. How many different sports and things I'm like election night. I've heard there should be a red zone for election night. How many different ones have you been pitched? And are there any that you would actually be interested in doing? If somebody could put them together? That's a great question. And I think I've heard all of them. I've actually participated in some, I am. I am the primetime host of gold zone for NBC and Peacock for the Olympics. Every two years. I did the Paris games for a summer and then just did the Milan Cortina games. And gold zone is what you think it is. It is red zone for the Olympics, right? 30 different events going on in 15 different venues. Let's take it. We're going to get a wherever and, and that's fun. It's a little harder to memorize. It's just lava skittish Vili's stats than it is. Patrick Mahomes is, but gold zone for the Olympics has been a good one. The other major team sports though, guys, it's not conducive to it. Yeah. The secret sauce for red zone, honestly, is the 42nd play clock. Because I can get you to Dallas and show you what Dak Prescott just did and sneak in a Jordan love highlight. And then maybe even something else from Detroit or wherever, and get you back for the next Cowboys snap. And you didn't miss anything. Yeah. Baseball can't do that. Basketball, hockey can't do that. College football now is very intriguing. Yeah. And especially with the NFL. I don't know if this is super publicly known, but with the NFL, Disney merger, Disney ESPN got the rights to the red zone brand. So if they want to start college red zone and call it college red zone, they're able to. I'm in. Yeah, I'm in. Yes. Right. Yes. A little different feel because you don't, when you bounce from Lions Packers to Giants Eagles, right? It's, it's big, big, all that. You might be bouncing from Michigan, Ohio state to Akron versus, you know, Mississippi state. Yeah. Somebody never. Yeah. But. But fans would find it and it would, I think it would find an audience. Yeah. How are we doing? You guys got any suggestions? Cause if it, Hey, I'm looking at green zone here. If it makes money. There you go. Yeah. Like I'll try out for it. Yeah. College football would be great. Uh, I would, I would love to watch that. Baseball is very tough to do. I think basketball would be interesting. Just cause like, you know, like it's almost like the March madness. You cut in live, uh, how it used to be when, when like way back in the day, when you only could watch one March madness game and they would cut into it. But yeah, football is built for it. How are we doing, Scott? I know the last time we had you on, uh, I might've had a gripe or two about, uh, gambling etiquette. How are we doing with that? I know that most people don't care, but I do think there is a, you know, there can be a blowout and, and, and you're not giving us the same juice when a score happens that hits the over or a score happens that covers a spread. Like those are, those are important. Well, look at you guys knew when it was years ago, when, when we had that discussion, I had a little bit of handcuffs on because the NFL hadn't embraced gambling yet. Now the NFL has multiple gaming partners and of course, you know, the, the tail follows the dog. I'm allowed to say things more overtly than I would before. I will say this. And we were presented by DraftKings sports book for the last few years, right? The title sponsor. Um, I will look at something. When a crazy play happens at the end of a game, I'll look at my, my right-hand man, Tim Galanians. And I'll be like, was that off camera off microphone? Was that a bad beat? Cause I want to, I want to say something about it. Like I don't gamble. I don't even look at the point spreads to be honest. I don't want that in my head, but if it's on the backside where I know my audience is howling about it at home, like, Oh my God, they kicked a field goal. They could have just took a knee and they kicked a field goal instead. And that pushed it over or whatever. I want to, I want to at least give a nudge, nudge, wink, wink. Yeah. We're with you. We understood what that consequence was. Right. You kick it over to, yeah, that's what we need. Yeah. Yeah. The spreads. Yeah. But I'm not going to, but, but it's not gambling zone. It's not, it's, you know, agreed. It's, it's not, it's not gambling zone. Cause I think that people should be able to watch football and if they don't gamble, they should have an outlet that does not focus on that because they'll be able to trust me. If you were gambling on the games, you can figure it out on your own. If it was a bad beat. Yeah. 35 to three game, 35 to three in the fourth quarter, we're not showing it unless a guy does a cartwheel, a three 60 spin and lands backwards in the end zone. We're not showing a play from that game. But if that game is 35 to three and the number is 38 and a half and the other team decides to boot a field goal at the end, it doesn't mean anything to any football, but I get it. It's, you know, significant to some as our friend Scott Van Pelt says. Yeah. Football first. And then whenever there's, you know, a moment, it looks like, Hey, this doesn't matter. It does matter to some. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. All right. I think you've done a better job. Big cat, big cat. Yeah. You of all people. Yeah. No. How influential you are to red zone as an entity and a production. You know what I'm talking about? Are you saying witching hour? Witching hour was Francesa. I will not, I will not take credit for, but you pushed it. You pushed it. Yes. Yes. Yes. And it is. And I told you we have the actuality. I told you that I will, I'll call it the witching hour next week and run up the flagpole. And it is, it truly is. We say it in the, like in the gambling cave, we will get to that moment on Sunday. We'll be like, here we go. Witching hour. And you'll just feel like you said, the energy shift where games start to flip and Oh, this team looks like they're in control and now they're not. And it's like anything can happen in the witching hour. It really is the most chaotic hour of everyone's week. It's the best. Yeah. It's the best hour in sports. I mean, if there's a better one, show it to me 'cause I'll watch it. it's it's the best hour on sports tv and and hey props to francesa i've heard his soundbite of being with brent musburger and jimmy the greek and all that back in the day and whatnot and and doing that thing and props if that's where it came from but yeah it's in the it's in the zeitgeist now it's not going anywhere i think we gave it some some turbo juice to to to bring it to a new audience and it does you you do you say it at just the right time yeah every week it does feel like that's right when i start to lose i hear you come on the screen i'm like this mother everything goes to shit right when you say yeah can i tell you that we have a bit of a formula we don't do the witching hour by wristwatch i know no it's not yeah this is probably the first time i'm saying this in public so this is good breaking news yeah it's not don't it's not no i know i'm actually i'm very interested do you want to guess as to how we determine when we should say the witching hour do you want to guess i would imagine it's something about however many games have to be in the fourth quarter basically okay if we have an eight game early window my producer and i shout out todd mossberg mossy great best in the biz uh mossy and i will be like all right we got eight games four of them have just hit zeros at the end of the third quarter or one's already there when we get about half of the games in any given window into the fourth quarter or at the end of the third quarter commercial break we're like let's start let's look can we call it the witching hour in the next 90 seconds or so but what we're trying to do on the back side because when we do witching hour i go to the scoreboard ladies and gentlemen eight games going on across the national football league five of them are one possession games in detroit in new england in miami in atlanta and in wherever kansas city and it's the witching hour when wins become losses and losses become wins boom we want to cut to one of those games that's a one possession game in the fourth quarter has to be looking at the off ramp for the witching hour you would think it's just a simple thing that oh yeah get into the fourth quarter no it's it's a it is air traffic control trying to line up all the pieces to the right right place but that's how we call the witching hour how we determine what it is yeah i am told there are text threads across the world and the nfl imports red zone to every country that gets nfl football in fact it's the number one way to watch football in a lot of countries i'm told there are text threads around the world that explode when they say if you're doing laundry or whatever get your ass to the couch yep hansen just called the witching hour sitting on the couch watching tv is our number one export yeah as americans and we're damn proud of it hell yeah by the way like that's that's what we do better than anybody we're the best we're the best in the world come at us bro how sick were you at changing the channel with a remote back in the day is this something that you always you always had that skill you know the first nfl red zone episode ever i called my mom up and i'm like mom you know i'm hosted this new show red zone i think this could be a vehicle for my career so she only watches football like when i'm involved with it or something like that so she watches and she's and i call her up i'm like isn't it awesome isn't it sweet we jump around she's like scott you act like you haven't been doing this since you were five years old she goes you don't remember you would watch the living room with a cable swinging behind it in in and try and get a different game on that next to the family room tv and then you go on the radio i'm an old man so i go back to when you were finding games on radio try and get a different game and then you'd have a magazine and a newspaper in front of you the whole time and you would say i'm like yeah you know that's right mom i actually did used to do that so yeah i guess i've i've always been slick with it when it comes to football multitasking every year there's you know the nfl changes which is what makes it so beautiful why we love it so much are there any names that are keeping you up at night any new names how so i missed it any new names like player names that you're going to be called to say on the spot if they score a touchdown standby standby so me mr laminar your buddy low what was his name yeah jeff d low yeah jeff d low yo jeff yeah okay no i actually know you uh laminate here's your first round of the nfl draft right yeah yep and who have i who have i been stuck on the um the penn state guard first pick of the baltimore ravens vega i gotta i got my uh phonetics over on the other computer here i i own a i forget his name um yeah there's a couple of first rounders that i know i'm gonna be doing they gotta make plays for a little while uh the arizona state offensive tackle uh i end a chore i oh i i gotta i gotta yeah i got i got work to do it's right it's pre-season for for red zone two pre-season bro and i will be there or or i'll just say his first name if i have to yeah yeah just initials work too how uh is there a certain team that you like in studying and everything you're like extra excited to to have you know this season and be like this team i expect to be explosive yeah i mean there's a couple of teams it's the nfl so nobody knows nothing if you would have had me on this show 365 days ago and i go guys guys i got this i've run the numbers it's seahawks patriots in the super bowl right so so yeah you look at me like i'm nuts so nobody knows nothing however teams where the offensive talent seems to outweigh the defensive talent are grist for the mill when it comes to red zone so i'm looking at the dallas cowboys when they're on red zone they're on national tv as much as you can be right but when they're on red zone dallas although their defense should be improved the cincinnati bengals are a team that is going to score 31 points a game whether they give up 30 or 32 points a game is the question of their win-loss record uh detroit lions a little bit like that their defense suffered you know tons of injuries last year but the offense is capable of putting up numbers i kind of look at those teams and i'm like yeah we're going to see them on red zone in the red zone on offense putting up numbers with some exciting fantasy players should be kind of fun yeah do you have bears are in that category by the way bad defense good offense yeah yeah yeah they lived on turnovers last year bud yeah and that's cyclical we all know that's cyclical you cannot expect that to happen this year although they're ahead of schedule by all accounts it'll be a fun year in chicago do you have any uh any statistics for the red zone for like the players names that you've said the most like who scored the most the most red zone channel touchdowns because we've got some great players obviously that play in the nfl since you get on the air but i think a lot of them they end up playing a large amount of prime time games yeah for national audiences that sort of thing so i was just curious if you if there were any deep dives and like uh you know uh deep statistics about the best players in the the 1 p.m games yeah i i'll have to hit up i don't have the answer off the table to me right here but tim galanians brian laravy my right-hand men that literally sit next to me with their computers they have spreadsheets going back years and they could tell you how many touchdowns were scored in week four of 2012 right um the players names i think tim maybe did it i want to say it's like derrick henry is up there um cmc is one of the leading touchdown scorers we've ever had because we started in 2009 this is season 18 for us so you got to think of longevity of career and an excellent player over the longer course of that i think it was derrick henry is the player that scored the most touchdowns on nfl red zone over the course of our course of our show i'll check though rob gronkowski was up there for a while all the patriots always had tons of prime time games yeah uh the usual suspects quite frankly yeah uh well scott this has been awesome i got one last question for you it's a roback question r-h-o-b-a-c-k.com promo code take 20 off your first purchase q-zips polos hoodies joggers shorts roback.com promo code take your excitement has me just like i i'm ready to go you that's what you dude that's why you're so good at your job you sound like football like getting you you just being on this show right now and just being excited has me just fucking amped up for that first sunday i've i've thought about it we're we actually have a lot of people that have been in our gambling cave we we are getting new couches and i held off putting in the new couches until the the first sunday so we're gonna have a whole experience of like hey we're we're walking in a little makeover yeah it's it's a special day i gotta get in there someday i'll never get in there on a red zone sunday but if if there's a march madness or something i will get my butt there i would i've watched your socials yeah i would love to do it it would be awesome all right zach you're up you got a question for scott i do scott i do have a quick question for you uh with almost two decades of red zone coverage under your belt have you converted any other aspects of your life to like strictly you know highlight basis oh that's a good one that's a good one um what sometimes this is so bizarre sometimes if i'm not much of a cook but when i cook i'll look at my stovetop with four burners and i'll be like oh quad box honestly like it's like it's like stupid stuff like that will hit me uh i do a lot of shout out videos like on cameo and whatnot and i get asked to do like bachelor parties and weddings and stuff like that so nfl wed zone is is a term that I've coined that there was a woman who incorporated allowing her husband to watch Red Zone in her wedding vows at the altar, right? So it's seeped into every area of my life and a lot of fans' lives, too. I love that. Yeah, good one, Zach. I like that. I love that. Good question, Zach. Well, Scott. Good question, Zach. Thank you. Scott, good luck this season. We'll be watching. We love everything you do, and thanks for coming on. You really do sound like football. It's like the Pavlov's dog thing. I hear you, and I want pizza, and I want to be screaming at a TV somewhere. I'm back in. I'm back in. 12 days, boys. 12 days. Can't wait to see it. I love the tweets, too. The two Sundays. Two Sundays. Oh, man. Get me fired up. Football's back. Thanks, guys. Thank you, Scott. Scott Hanson was brought to you by Morgan & Morgan, also sponsoring Firefest of the Week. It's important who you hire. If you want a job done right you got to make the right hire. If you need somebody to kick a field goal maybe don't hire a defensive back to do it. They might be too athletic, won't be able to kick the ball correctly. You don't want to make the wrong hire. It can be disastrous, but that's where Morgan & Morgan comes in. If you're ever injured by the negligence of another Morgan & Morgan is America's largest injury firm for a reason. They've been helping people with their own Firefests for over 35 years. Over 100 offices nationwide. More than 1,000 lawyers. With over $30 billion recovered for over 500,000 clients. Morgan & Morgan has a proven track record of fighting to get you full and fair compensation. If you're ever injured, you can check out Morgan & Morgan. The fee is free unless they win. For more information, go to ForThePeople.com slash PMT or dial pound law. That's pound 529 from your phone. That's ForThePeople.com slash PMT or you can dial pound law. That's pound 529. This is a paid advertisement. All right, Firefests of the Week. Hank, what do you got? Anything good? Yes, decent one. Yeah? Tuesday night, parcel after dark. We did a field goal kicking stream. You were great until you got injured? Yeah, I was like probably over 50% in my first 20. Probably. And then I got dead foot. I like hit a nerve or something on the top of my foot. Yeah. Essentially how I describe it is like if you tap your left foot, tap your right foot, I could tap my left foot, I could not lift up my toes with my right foot. I could lift my knee, I could walk fine, but it's like if your hand falls asleep, your leg falls asleep, you know it's there, but I couldn't feel anything on my foot, specifically like lifting up my toes, my tootsies. Yeah. And I was driving home afterwards. It was late, and I pulled into my building, into the garage, slowed down, and I like went to go transfer from gas to brake, and I realized this after the fact, but obviously like driving is a lot of just lifting up your toes, switching from one to the other. That's a fact. And my brain was like, hey, lift up your toe. My toe was dead. My foot was dead. It did not respond quick enough, and I was going slow. I was going like five miles an hour, but I did not stop quick enough. And just like I hit my garage. I hit the garage in my building, and then- With your car. With my car. That's crazy. Car was fine. No damage to my car. Just ran into something in the parking lot. The garage went up, and then it wouldn't come back down. The guy that was in the garage was freaking out. The maintenance guy had already left. Spent like 45 minutes with him trying to figure out how to get the garage door down. And then the next day they fixed it, but I talked to my building like, oh, yeah, we have the garage people coming. Also, there might have been some damage to the roof, so we have the roof people coming. We'll let you know what the bill is. But later, the garage people came and fixed it real quick. I have not gotten the bill yet, but I don't think- I was worried they're going to have to completely take the garage down, put up a new garage door. There was no visual damage to the garage door, but it just wasn't- It was not- It's an automatic garage, and it was going up, and it was not coming down. So you hit the garage door and broke the garage door of your building, which- With hundreds of people in it. For probably- It was fixed the next morning. It's like if I broke my garage door, the only person who did inconvenience is me and my wife. Well, there's two garage doors. Oh. Yeah. There's an in and an out. But no one could go in? Well, no. It's happened before where they're doing maintenance or whatever, where they turn it into an in and out. Everyone comes in, everyone goes out. They combine it. But the next morning, everything was fixed. So it was not- I was worried that it was going to be like a long-term damage thing that I was going to get. People would start talking like, who did this? Oh, it was a guy with a dead leg. It was only like eight hours, you're saying? Yeah. Okay. Yeah. So it was like 11 o'clock at night. It seemed basically like by the time the maintenance guy came back the next morning, it was fixed pretty quickly. So why again did you drive into your door? Dead foot. My foot was dead from kicking. I have a video of it right here. Did you think about taking your other foot and using it on the break? In hindsight, I should have. I should have done that. How did you get home? I can lift my leg. So I just wasn't- It was just like I wasn't- When I was driving, I was lifting my leg and I just kind of- It's a short turn. This might be what happened with Deshaun. Look at the video that he sent to me. You can see his left foot, he can tap it the whole time. And then he tries to go to his right foot. Nothing. But he lifts it. Yeah. Now, can you tap now? Yeah. So that's the best he could do. With his right foot. Yeah. So, Hank- The feeling has come back. As someone who's kicked some footballs in my life before, what you're describing is not like- It's not super uncommon, but you usually have to kick a lot more than just- How many did you kick? 11 for 20. 11 for 20? Yeah. Pre-dead foot, yeah. And it's not like a nerve. It's just like your ligaments are tired. Your foot was just tired. Yeah, I'm not a foot-based athlete. I never played soccer. Never played football. Never kicked in my life. So, I kind of knew I was going to be bad at kicking. And I was actually pretty good until my foot died. You were 11 for 20. Basically as good as Max, is what you told me. In the beginning, yeah. We were like neck and neck. Is that true, Max? Max was actually pretty good. We all were. Max was pretty good. I was okay. For the record, I've also never kicked a field goal before in my life. Hank, you were so lucky that- Rika was there. But, yeah, I mean, even if Rika wasn't there, our team would have won. Like, I was getting them in the, in the, in the, through the uprights. I guess we'll never know. Until my foot died. Yeah. But the last, yeah, the last 30, I was, I was, I was still trying to kick them. I was being a warrior. You are a warrior. Probably made it a lot worse. You, you must have been doing some weird form, like, I don't understand how that happened. Like, the, what, what happened? What were you doing to get that result? I was hitting, I think I just hit, like, I don't know how, you know, the, the nerves on the top of your feet work, but I was, I was hitting- He's got weak ankles. My legs are cooked, right? You were kicking, you were kicking toe balls. I was trying to kick like a kicker. He's got weak ankle muscles. That's the, there's no nerves. He didn't hit a nerve. Yeah. His foot's just weak. Mm-hmm. My foot's okay. The, the feeling is back. We're, we're recovering. He's a weak guy. Yeah. Well, no, weak feet. Weak tootsies. Yeah. I'm not a, I'm not a foot-based, foot-based athlete. Not a foot-based, yeah. Mm-hmm. Never will be. 20 kicks. You're not into feet. 20 kicks. You made 11 of them. Over 50%. Over 50%. Until you got hurt. Until the deadline. But then you kept kicking. And those stats, unfortunately, do count, too. Right, but not, you know, it's all asterisks. So what are those stats? Besides breaking one garage. I'd have to look it up. That's, we're talking about getting into some deep numbers here, because most people just take the original 11 for 20 when Hank was, before he hurt himself. Right. I think it was like 11. 11 for 50 or something. 11 for 50? Yeah, I think it was about 11 for 50, so. Yeah. So you didn't make another kick. 22%. No. And you broke a garage. Temporarily, yeah. Temporary break. All right, let's see. What was the number? Go back. So you, did you stop kicking? Oh, so you were 11 for 46. So you. My foot died. Wait, 11 for 46? Yeah, he was 11 for 20. That's 26 kicks of heart. I was kicking with my heart. Can you go back a little more? Do you make sure that he was actually 11 for 20? I don't think they were updating it. They weren't? Oh. Actually, I have no idea. Yeah, no, they were. You weren't. All right, so he's three for 14 there. That's before you hurt yourself. Okay. Three for 14. That's unfortunate that we found that. Yeah, three for 14. I like the narrative. But that also means that he made. Oh, wait, no. You can't go from three for 14 to 11 for 20. That's actually impossible. Yeah, that fuzzy math. But it does sound like Hank got better the more hurt he got. Yeah. You just weren't hurt enough, buddy. So you weren't hurt for three for 14, correct? Yeah, but I had never kicked before, so it took me probably five to. I was also seven for nine at this point. Oh, three for six. Okay. All right. So maybe then that's when I got hurt. Yeah, that's when you got hurt. Oh, we got to see. Yeah. The stats on if they updated it. all right there you go right there that is three for 11 okay you're getting worse and then you were trying to find it oh here we go here's one where to go where to go here we go six for 21 that's not bad so 11 for 20 was not was never never happened that was rough yeah that was that was rough that happened to be just one over 50 so we're just thinking back to the first six kicks literally the the first six you got 50 you were three for six and then you're like oh my foot died yeah again just from overuse from kicking the ball six times but then yeah like 25 kicks of heart of heart all none of them made and a garage yeah and then you drove into your house and possibly a roof yeah yeah yeah how did you damage the roof i don't know like yeah we got the garage guy coming in the roof guy i was like uh i think if you're about to like be buying this building if you hit the garage door hard enough it might just send it up into the roof yeah reverberated yeah so no one could leave you you trapped everybody in your oh there you go that was your 11 11 for 36 well that was post injury yeah yeah that's when it was all hard yeah but you had been walking around telling everyone who could hear 11 for 20 yeah ish it is true all right pft what's your firefest i've had firefesting good firefest i've had a pretty good week mine is is the other side of that coin where i feel like dangerously good it's been probably three years since i've kicked a football maybe two years i feel good after that tuesday night stream to the point where like i'm ready to get back in the lab yeah back feels good the fact that i i survived that entire thing without pulling something again we're stacking small victories right now yeah um but rapoli pick up the phone because let's go i i might not be mr 35 anymore i might be mr 34 fuck it maybe mr 35 um give me some time i'm i'm back i'm back as a kicker are you worried about a dead leg no my leg feels great okay my leg field it felt stronger but i'm like see like i didn't participate in the stream and uh i'll never kick a football again after hearing what hank went through i mean yeah it's deadly yeah all it takes is one wrong kick and then you're a menace behind the wheel you're doing a five finished 84 for 87 damn no pretty now granted they were uh they were the old extra points so 20 yards still but still like i feel like and i wasn't i wasn't trying to kick it too hard i think that most of those probably could have been good from 30 which sounds awesome to say uh i think i can get 35 maybe 40 you get me back in the gym get the back still feeling good i might be fully back now this is very dangerous thing for me to answer like next week i yeah i tear a quad um but we're feeling good rico went seven for 76 i was just about to say it thank god for him seven for 76 is so good that's so funny chat things 11 for 46 isn't really that bad in comparison yeah you did okay um okay uh my fire fest uh it's listen football's back excited for football to be back i'm trying to plan to not gain weight this football season and i know that i'm already losing the battle because last night we had wings uh tonight i'm sure we'll have something else and pizza and i had a couple of balls in the ice cream um i don't know what we're gonna do but we got to figure it out i max and i were talking about potentially doing like dog fences the electrical dog fences where we just fence off the kitchen and put on the collars because the problem is i just stand up i go take a piss boom blackout i've had 10 wigs sometimes i do a thing where i go i'm i'll i'm like oh i'm gonna go make a coffee just so i can stand in there and pick while i'm making the maybe we need to put the food somewhere else i don't hate that yeah yeah maybe like put it somewhere that's in the back in this back kitchen harder to get i love that i love that idea yeah i love that idea you have that's actually what we should do you have to make an intentional destination right to the back kitchen there's no you have to really walk you never have you never casually walk past it right by accident you have to be going to the ice cream machine to get the coat of the food this could change our our the future of our lives i completely agree just this one little switch tell jack mccarthy that's the time right now right now what memes state your case means it's not gonna work why not it might work for max i don't know why he said why it's not gonna work for me you i've seen the way you eat you pick it you just grab no on the yeah that's what i do yeah but if there's not pizza you'll just go candy or snack oh you know they'll just eat yeah no because i gotta open no you'll find a way no it's probably not gonna work for either of us but i like trying it we just need to take out all the food in this office what if we play basketball before sundays i'm down listen i'm gonna try to get on the treadmill before kickoff i've been i've been going to the gym for over two and a half days and i feel good i feel really good i was really good about going to the gym when i got back from the honeymoon and then the kicking happened and my legs have been in shambles ever since so it's like i'm not going to the gym when i'm already this sore i just would love to just do one football season where i don't gain 15 pounds you can do it we can do this i'm gonna be in the best shape of my life by the end of football season same same i swear to god same wait what the fuck what is he listening who he's jack is is being did you text him kick him out kick him out i just said we've made a decision about football food and he says nope your fat asses can just not eat it it's staying up up front learn self-control fatties okay we'll tell jack get ready to learn fired jack has a spray tan yeah tell jack uh jerry's got something in his car he'd like to share with yeah we can go talk we can go talk to jerry if you want to play that game yeah all right zach finish this off uh we could just put hoodies on though just to speak to the dude that's the problem zach because i know hoodie season is i'm about to buy a bunch of new hoodies and then i'm like oh i'm fine you can't think like that we gotta stay in front of it this year stay in front of it what happens is this conversation always happens in like november where we're like oh it's gotten so bad let's get in front of it speaking of hoodies what the heat up wore hoodies it's like a sauna yeah we're like wrestlers yeah don't hate that it's like watching football how do we get in front of it it's basically a workout at that point yeah and we we quit after like three weeks dude yeah we're not doing that this year that's the problem getting married but that's the problem is we keep doing weight loss challenges why don't we just change our habits i think the food going in the back is huge huge there's no way i'm walking back there food's going he keeps saying no he i don't think he has he has the right to say no to this not to me that's what i'm saying right okay zach how did he how did he know that i think he just knows that we're just talking about but he knew exactly our plan yeah all right zach my fire phase this week is uh i've been looking into getting being a bike guy as of yet tuesday really uh motorcycle no just like pedal bike or electric bike because i had a pretty sobering moment uh in a ride share that reminded me that rangers and you shouldn't trust everyone that you just take a ride home with okay uh had a great day at work great week really so this isn't too much but hop straight into the ride share took a couple minutes to go around the office where i got my backpack and then the driver was just watching pornography oh so it's pretty uncomfortable kind i i just saw like just flash of sex and i that was it was it on uh when on a phone yeah just on a cell phone and then he kind of shuffled i thought about making a joke about it i was like let's be light-hearted and then he was like oh my god i'm then he just started talking about messy to soldier field so we got past it pretty quick but i might just be out on ride share for a little bit so wait when he started talking about messy were you like just put the porn back on dude i don't hate that move because he was talking about really excited yeah then the draw yeah the field something to think about but so zach you've just had two times in the last week and a half where you have just been uh like sex has been thrown in your face and you're not a sex guy yeah one physical though one just like virtual virtual that's okay that's whatever but yeah so you're gonna do you know how to ride a bike oh definitely well i mean i haven't done in a while but yeah that what do they say it's like riding a bike you always know how to ride a bike yeah yeah yeah that's what they do i think that's what they you haven't done it since you moved here maybe what probably not when's the last time you rode a bike i can ride a bike are you sure i don't like where this is yeah definitely we're gonna need to we're gonna need to see you ride a bike i might go one hand you know i might be able to tricks on it one hand is not hard you're like you like have to be able to do one hand so you can tell people behind you where you're going yeah well i've never done like transit bike riding so like i never had to experiment with the signal did you but regardless that's not a trick that's an extreme trick i was just talking the you know one-handed was the x games you never seen the one yeah or the four leaf clover you ever done the what's that two off top feet off the pedals you do that no but yeah it's a great video okay so you're going to start biking so that you don't accidentally oh yeah this kid i remember so you don't get accidentally hit with porn anymore that's the that's the mission it was more so just a reminder of like oh you're too comfortable just getting into strangers' cars. That was the Rizzler. Yeah, that was the Rizzler. That's an all-time bad. Fucking badass. All right, so you're a bike guy. I need you. Very important question. You know what this question is. Probably not. Maybe. I mean, I think you should. I think I should, too. What's the question? But it's going to look very funny. Yeah, but it's safe. Helmet or no helmet. People can't drive here. I think you need to wear a helmet. I'm definitely going to wear a helmet. Can we put stickers on your helmet? Yeah, there's space on there. We could come to an agreement. Get him, like, a shark helmet or something. Something really cool. Oh, a helmet with a visor? Yeah, you need a helmet. You think tinted? We can't get you getting hurt. All right? Yeah, guys drive too crazy out here. Like, in a different place, maybe not. But here, definitely got to go helmet. I want to get into the ways and means of how I. I don't know how I acquired this thing, but I did happen to acquire one of those tiny dirt bikes. Oh, yeah, those things are sick. The real small ones? Yes. Zach, would you like a tiny dirt bike? Oh. Motorized? Sure, I'm definitely down to hold that for a little bit. Okay. Hell yeah. I think that might be the best way for you to get to and fro work. If I one-hand that, that's a trick, though, right? That's a trick. Confirmed trick, yeah. Or no. Also, does he need a license for that? Probably not. Okay. Wait, we're not going to look that up, so we can. We can plead ignorance if we have to. Okay. But I'll get it charged, ready to roll for you. Let's go, Zach. Tear shit up on this thing, Zach. That's huge. On a mini bike. Hell yeah. All right, good show, boys. Week one. Tune in. Boomers coming back Sunday night. Get excited. We'll be streaming all weekend. Let's do numbers. Five. Three. Seven. 55. 17. We're going to take. The commanders. 80. Eight. 88. Shout out. Shout out. America's pervert. Stu Feiner. Yep. Self-proclaimed America's pervert. Love it. I am America's pervert. Yes, you are. Hurry up, Shane. Shane, how's your dick feeling? How's your dick feeling? Dick's okay. Okay. Back to normal. Oh. So just okay. Just okay. Numbers, guys. Numbers. 15. 15 for Shane. Colton, Jacob. 18. 18. 69. 69. It's been 69. Go five for the commanders. Oh, there we go. 80. 80. Fuck. Oh. I said 80. And then I added eight onto it. Oh. Yeah. Dang it. Dang it. So you didn't get it. I didn't get it. No. I didn't get it. Kind of like you, memes. You've never fucking gotten it. Either it's PFC or Colt. I didn't get it. Yeah, that's fine. So you admit. All right. Thank you. You admit it. I was just very open about not getting shit. That was close. You did just mean it. Let's go, commanders. Five. 55. Win three, memes. Win three. I'm on your side. 47. I do. If you were locked in, I'd do that every single episode. Lock in, Max. Max, you need to fucking lock in, dude. Not locked. Happy birthday to Dan Quinn. Happy birthday to Zay Flowers. Happy birthday to Bear Bryant, Ed Reed, Tom Landry, Andrew Luck. Whoa. Happy birthday to Yao Ming. Happy birthday to. 2 Chainz and Sidney Sweeney. True. Love you guys. Check out offers on the 2026 Silverado at