"Sandra Bullock"

(upbeat music) Okay, so the secret to a peanut butter sandwich, I don't do the jelly, don't even start. I get the knife and I stir up the peanut butter and then on the bread, you have to wipe it all the way to the edge and you put the other pizza bread on, you slice it right down the middle, don't do corners, don't do fours, and then you wash it down with a nice cold glass of smartness, welcome to smartness. - Smart, smart, smart, smart, smart, smart, smart, smart, smart, smart, smart, smart. - Jason, I just got a phone with Amanda, I can't believe you were in the airport for 18 hours, is that right? - Oh, yeah, it wasn't fantastic. There was a, I'm gonna leave now. - Before you start, I can't believe you got off the phone with Amanda. - Okay, go ahead Jason. - No, that was 19 hours, the plane flight to Iceland was just 18. - Oh, my intuition, what happened? - 'Cause it was delayed, is that right? - Just a delay, a bunch of weather in New York and then we couldn't take off from LA and then there was a layover once we got to New York and these are all, no one's complaining, we're out here, we're living our dream here in Iceland. - And Iceland, you can't believe you're there. What time is it? - Right now, it is 4.30 in the afternoon. - Okay. - Are you exhausted? - Yes, yes. But you know, I've got just a beak full of schnitz. - Oh, I'm ready to go. - Yeah, I've got, yeah, I've got piped into some great Icelandic stuff. - Oh no, you're doing so great all these. - Oh, it's just, everything's white here. So it's just like, give me a bag of that. - You can't tell. - What's white? - Yeah, no, I'm up for it. I'm into it. - Wow. - I'm glad you made it. - Yeah, how are you guys today? Will is not run out of gum. This is great news. (laughing) - I'm trying to keep it warm. - I'm trying to keep it warm. - You know, they've got lozenges and I think some cream. They've got nicotine cream. - I know. - Is that nicotine gum for real? - Of course it is. - No, I've got the pouch in and then I use gum 'cause I need to kind of cut it with the gum. - Sure, wait a second. So you have a pouch, you have a pouch in your mouth and-- - And regular gum, regular gum. - A regular gum. - That kind of cuts it for me. - What do you mean cuts it like makes it less, less powerful? - Yeah, and just like the taste of it. - The taste of it 'cause you get a little bit of like some of that thing that I don't really enjoy. - I'll do a glass of water and a glass of apple juice and I cut the juice with the water. 'Cause sometimes the apple juice is too strong for you. - Yeah, it is, yeah. - But do you find that if you drink both that your pull ups get full early, like do you have to leave? (laughing) - My adult pull ups. - Yeah. - Oh my God, Sean, I just love him so much. - Oh no, I know. - He is a teddy bear with a heart. He drinks full whole milk, right? It's always full. - No, no, no, it's usually skim milk. I'll drink whole milk but it's usually skim, yeah. - What's the difference between skim milk and 2%? - Well, the skim tastes a little bit, the whole milk smells a little funny. It's in a taste a little too thick for me. - Sure. - But I like a milkshake. - With whole milk, Sean. - Yeah, no, I know that. But what about, but 2% versus skim, do we know is it just a different name for the same thing? - Well, it's less fat. - It's like half, I think it's like a step between, isn't it? - It's less fat. - Well, which is less? - The skim milk is zero fat. - Oh really? - Yeah. - 2% leaves still leaves a little bit on top. Has not been fully skimmed. - I think that's right. - I think that's right, yeah. - Listen, are you still with us? - Yeah. (laughing) - I also never understood why. And I also never understood like 1%, 2%, is it really that much different? Like, one difference between 1% and 2%, isn't that much in life? - Well, two is double, yeah. - And the thickness of the cheese cloth, what you drag across the top of the 10-pale. - Would you be upset if I had t-shirts made to say I like milkshakes? - No, I would, I would, I would wear one. - Okay. - I would totally wear one. - And on back, can I print skimmy? (laughing) - Go ahead and skimmy. - Hey, I went to the Hollywood Bowl two nights ago. It was gorgeous. - Hang on, Will Sean's got a bit. Hold on, Sean. - No, no. - No, but other than, I was there literally two nights ago, and I was listening to Bazae and like, Carmen and stuff. And I looked up at the station like, we're gonna be there October 17th. And I was like, it didn't feel that scary. Like in my mind, it's scary. But then when I was there, I was like, okay, it's a little less scary. - But did you turn around and look at the crowds behind you? - Yes. - That would be our perspective. That's where it gets scary. - I know, my stomach dropped a little bit then. But yeah, it's a big shot. - Well, I hope there's more than just friends and family sitting in that big huge bowl. - I know. - You hear that, this story? - Listen, or get yourself a ticket and just help us out a little bit. 'Cause it's gonna be, it's gonna be scary. And it'd be less scary if there's friends. - October 17th. - Guys, you're gonna be less scary today because it's somebody we all know might not know. - Sorry, wait, just remind me so I don't miss it. When do I need to be at the bowl? What day is that? - October 17th. - October 17th. - That's a Saturday. - At the Hollywood Bowl. - That's a Saturday, so if you're coming from out of town that you have plenty of time to get there after work Friday. You know, you can come Saturday morning if you want, if you want to drive that way. - Yeah, sleep at our house. - And then when you're coming from the East Coast, you got the time difference. I mean, you leave on a 9 a.m. flight, you're here by noon. - Yeah. - So three are a net difference. - Yeah. - What if the three of us slept like the old people Charlie and the chocolate factory in one bed, one big wide bed? - One big wide bed. - In the head. - Oh, God, if we ever do another doc that we got to do a shot of that. - All right, guys, my guest, you're gonna love this person. - Okay. - You already do. - Yeah. - You already do. - No. - She's very close to us. My guest today, she spent 12 years taking a piano lesson. She says she hated every minute of it. Her mother's work kept the family moving back and forth between Virginia and Europe. She left college, three credits short of graduating and waited tables in New York before. Eventually took her, before her dreams took her west. (laughing) - Whoa. - I came back. (laughing) - Wait, is it Cindy? - Wait. - Oh, let's see this. I got the laugh. I got the laugh. There it is. - Wait a minute. - Wait, this is the best line. - She once shared her home with two rescue dogs who had five legs between them. - And she turned, it's definitely Sandy. I think she's still got the one with the three legs. - It's Sandra. - We love her. - We love her. - Sandra. - Sandra. - Sandra. - I tried my own life. (laughing) - I heard the laugh. - That's horrible. - I'm here, I'm here. - That's Sandy laughing. - Oh my god. - That was the worst intro ever. - It was Sandy's day. - Do you guys, but here's my question. I was listening to you guys conversed. Do you guys really, is this how you guys speak to and with each other when no one else is listening? Are these the subjects that you guys cover? Like milk, fat content, things like that? - It was just that bad. And somehow we thought this might be worth monetizing. - Yeah. - Oh, is that what you're doing? You're sort of putting something out there so you get a little shawnt. Shawnt's the only one who drinks some milk in this group so you'll get the free cases. - Yeah. - Organic, right? You prefer organic? - Well yeah, I don't want to know. - No, he doesn't. - What non-organic look like? I mean, talk to me about that. Nobody. - It doesn't have the smell. - Yeah. - Shawntie, do you do your own grocery shopping? - Sometimes I hate. I don't like grocery shopping. - Do you order online or do you go? - No, I go. I don't like grocery shopping, stopping for gas or doing the dishes. - Oh. - Listen to me being a normal person. - Yeah. - Yeah. - You like to have staff doing all those things? - Yeah, what do you want? - Or a bond. - Or a bond. - Or a bond. - Or a bond. - Or a bond. - Or a bond. - Yeah. - Jewels. (laughing) - Or like gold bars. - He's honest. He's not trying to be humble. - Right. That's why I got an electric car. So, stop for gas anymore. - Now, Sandy, you. - Yeah. - The thing that's always impressed me about you is that you're a great big huge ass star. But you get out there with the people. You don't care. - Yes, you always do. - You don't care. - When you say I don't care, what does that mean? - Oh, you don't care about being stopped and being looked. - You don't care. (laughing) - About engaging with the public and people saying, "Hi, I love you." - What do you do? - Do you stand off-ish? - No, no, no, no. But I mean, we know people mutually that I think have our every bit as famous as you, but feel like they might not be able to get out there and into it. I mean, I can think of a dozen people that I know. - Is it for safety that they don't feel? - It could be. - I mean, might be safety. - Well, but you've had your brushes with things that are unsafe. Yet you still. - They seem to come to my house. So it's my house, that's insane. - Sandra Bullock, where are you right now? - Hi, cutie-putty. I'm in Jackson Hole, Wyoming. - Oh, it's very warm. - It's so pretty there. I love it. - It's so great. The kids are on the water. They're fishing this way. - I love that. Last year, by the way, I listened to your previous episode that you did for us and. - What did we talk about? - I know. Well, I was not mentally there during that show, so I don't even know what we talked about. - Five years ago. - Yeah. - Was that one of our first, what, 50 episodes probably? - Something like that. - Yeah. - Yeah. - Why was your head not there? I forget, Sandy. - Because it was the whole brand thing. The whole thing. - Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. - Yeah. - Yeah. - I was going to get there and. - Yeah. I don't remember anything. - We were. We were COVID-19, too, weren't we? - Yeah. - Somewhere, probably. - Yeah. Talk about how isolated. - Now, do you. Well, I'm going to jump ahead so we. - First of all, home, before you go too far, is that a legit shelf stock behind you? Or is that just for camera? It's because. it's fabulously stopped. Oh, well, it's, it's a, it's a mess. It's just like, no, but it's, it feels very curated and a nice mess, nice. Yeah, it's, well, I got little grogu right there. I see that. Is that Paulson? It looks like Sarah Paulson. Now it's Sarah Paulson and the Emmy on the other side. This is from Adam Driver. This is, I don't know what that is. That's an Emmy. Oh, that's an Emmy. Oh, that's an Emmy. This is a, this is a print of. Any facts is coming through. Any facts is coming through right now. You are checked the fastest way, but I think you've corrected, you've corrected us before. That is only one of your Emmys. This is correct. They're all, like, I, I can't pan. What do you, I know. Have you forgotten how many Emmys you have? How many do you have? I, I can't. I, we don't have time. Oh, God. It's just incredible for you. Yeah. By the way, you know, the sad part is nobody knows who won anything ever. Okay. So they know what you were. I was going to wait, Sandy, but I'm going to go back and get everything else. But let's get into practical magic, too, because I just saw it. You did. Because Sandy's a friend and I got a link and I got a little secret something. Oh, and it was cool. I fucking loved it. Did you really, you're not just saying that? No, are you? Well, first of all, I'm big as nerd. I like fantasy sci-fi, you know, that kind of stuff. Harry Potter. I can tell when she's lying. He's not lying. No, I loved it so much. And I love it. I'm so. Your performance, Nicole, Diane Weist, um, Stocker Channing. Yeah, all the kids. I can't ever want to rewatch the first one. Joey and Maisie. Yeah. Yeah. So good. Do you recommend rewatching the first one before the second one? Yeah. Well, you don't have to call back. You don't have to. But there are some callbacks. Yeah, definitely some callbacks. But if you've never seen the first, you don't, you don't, you can pick up. And the first one was like, you know, it wasn't like a massive gigantic hip, but then it became one later. It was became this like cold thing. Yeah. And so it made sense to do the sequel because it's like, oh, it's really cool. I loved it so much. And I love how long did how long did you guys wait in between each one? I mean, a couple decades. Yeah. Wow. Awesome. I mean, I mean, when the first one came out, we were eviscerated. We were by the critic. Oh, really? No. It was. How many women do you need in film? You know, how many tones do you need in film comedy and draw my end magic? And like, it was, it was a slight, I found myself like crouching down by the end of the junk. And you could just see I was like this, a C shape. And then you did so. Okay. That was we thought we were doing something really original and meaningful. And and not until like, I'd say it turns out you did. We did, but it for for the audience to find it, we needed social media. Yeah. So they could find each other and all of a sudden through social media, everyone found each other and then generation after generation, like, you know, my generation grew up and then had children and they watched it with their mothers and the grandmothers with their kids. Like, your kids that are 10 going, oh my god, it's my favorite movie because I watch it with my mom and my grandmother. And it's like, we don't get a lot of multi generational things like that. So that was a surprise to me and all of us. And last year you said you, last year you were, you were telling you had to tell everybody that every Sandra Bullock Instagram account was fake. You had to like, oh, no, that's fake. That's like, and then 14 months later, you graced us with your presence on Instagram, which is super fun for people like me, that's the friend of yours and everybody else to see what's up. And it's a great, it's a great tool. So only 14 months ago, did you start Instagram? No, like a few months ago, I started Instagram, but like about about a year and a half ago, I had to because there were people that were using my name and likeness to scam money out of people saying like, my sister would have people reaching out to her saying, your sister took thousands of dollars from me. I'm, I'm, my bags are packed. I'm meeting her like, and it, the harm that it was causing families going, we don't know how to not tell this person, it's fake, you know, and I would have people call them, say, it's fake, it's not real. So finally, you know, I had no intention of ever going on social media. Like, it's not, it wasn't my, my calling. And then once I did that, it stopped a little bit, but it doesn't really, I mean, there's just, it's just never ending. Yeah, I know. The stuff that you've had to deal with and handle and come out the other side and you're just, I mean, I don't know how much we're going to get into on this one. But I just, you're, you're spirit. It's just so commendable and it is. I just, I love, I love being close to you. Yeah. You're one of the strongest humans I know. Yeah. Not even man or woman. You're just one of the strongest humans I've ever known. And, and you know, going back to the movie. Thank you. I thank you. Yeah. What's that? I said, thank you. I think. Yeah. It's the biceps mostly. Is it, is it? I'm working on it. I kind of let myself go the past six months in front of a computer with this film and I was like, what has happened? I don't know, no, no. But I remember you being out in London the same time. I was doing good and I asked her you were shooting practical magic too and you came over. We had dinner and it's cool to have seen you in London and I'll then see the movie to see all the work that you've done and all the great work. And, and it's shot beautifully. Anyways, can't go on enough about it. But I love the whole idea at the center of the movie that the Owens women have this curse where it's a great like a rule or whatever. Where falling in love can mean losing the person they love, right? It's a great metaphor for a lot of things. A lot of things. And so I don't want to give anything away. But one of my favorite lines in the movie that you say is you say, I'm so happy you're free to love now, free to love exactly the way you want. Where you want. And that notice that I lean towards Maisie when I say that. Yes, I love that. And that made me think about something you and I talked about before you came on. You told me you're ready to talk a little bit about Brian. I know some of the story and some of it. I feel safe to talk to you guys about Brian. Yeah, because it's just us. No one's listening. It's just no one else. But it's it's it's it's safety. Yes, very it's true. And as it relates to everything we were just talking about and Jason was talking about, can you tell me a little bit about that relationship, what became difficult toward the end of both the relationship and sadly Brian's life and how you reconcile those difficult parts with loving someone so deeply. Yeah, yeah, that's a that's a very deep and great question. Yeah. And please don't feel feel free to say as much as little. Of course. No, absolutely. No, I'm so appreciate being open to it. The way I look at it and it's not so much looking at it is I know that this is, you know, there's a reason for everything I got. Sometimes it's not. It's just horrible. But what I where I sit now, what I have now, I would not have to share had I not gone through that. I would not ever want to go through it again, though you never know life, you know, is like life is, it's tricky. But I wasn't allowed to speak about it. That was the request and I tried to I honored it, which his illness. Yes, he asked me not to share and and I have my I know why he asked me not and it it isolated me in the process. And plus the entire world was locked in with a pandemic. It was literally like the the final diagnosis, even though I mean, he was ill for half of our relationship. And the diagnosed came almost at the same time with the cloak of the pandemic. So as a pandemic came down and I have a child with severe asthma, I was panicking. And then we were trying to navigate all the tests because with amiotrophic lateral sclerosis, you or amiotrophic lateral sclerosis, people wave around how they want to say it, which is a neurological disease where your signals just stop. The acronym commonly known as ALS. ALS. Yeah, Lugiarics disease. Yeah. You you don't go, oh, you have these symptoms. You have ALS. It is literally like the process of elimination over the course of a year and some where you keep going back and they give you all these milestones, these things to do these grips, these these breath tests, all these things. What's happening because ALS appears in different in different ways. His was not hereditary, which is I think a huge sigh of relief. But it was about a year and some of watching it to see what it is. It could have been this, could have been this, but what I saw, I knew. I knew it and you have to quietly plan. And I'm a very good planner with illness. And because my father was ill and he was had horrible accidents and my mother, I can't, I feel like I'm very comfortable in a setting where somebody is is is ill. It doesn't scare me. Not the illness itself. It doesn't scare me. I can see and be around just about anything, but I had two young kids that were navigating, especially a little girl who who saw him as a father figure. So with COVID and all of that and being asked not to talk and I wasn't even allowed to tell Amanda, I was not to tell anybody. My sister was the only one who knew for for a while. And I, and at first I go, oh, I can handle that. I can be quiet. But it really, it really, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's not having the help outside of like Merrick Kudkowicz, who was, who was the head of mass general over in Boston. She oversees all the trial drugs. I was able to find someone to find if he could get on the list of the trial drugs. And, and we, thankfully, the privilege that I have is we got there to at least be of service in, in this process because the outcome is final. One day it won't be final. There are some who are living with ALS still that I've only now discovered after Brian's passing because I didn't dare go So on, you know, my Finsta and look at, you know, I was so scared that I would get in trouble for speaking, you know, because someone will say something because it's because of my job, it's kind of like Sally Owens, I have a curse. I walk with this curse that knowledge is payment for somebody. It is information that is valuable. And so that's why I keep very isolated because I don't want to harm others because of what I do. Like, not talking for a while was good and then when the physical illness was then coupled with the mental health aspect of things, and it's something that people don't talk about. And it doesn't happen to everybody, but it was a trifecta that was pretty dark. And I had incredible nurses, like the guys that were like, they're like four big brothers in my kitchen every morning. I knew what they ate. I knew they all like banana bread. I knew their allergies or likes or dislikes, you know, and we became students at the same time. You know, while trying to keep the kids away from it or not away, depending on whatever they wanted, and I had an amazing child therapist who dealt with terminal illnesses to sort of help guide me with each and both of my kids are very different. But the kids were aware to a certain, right, completely aware, absolutely aware because eventually, once there is a situation where you're bedridden, you know, it's, we all have to go there. It's like it was in my house and I did my best to set up whatever I could. And I am lucky in that I had the means to pay for it, you know. Yeah. We'll be right back. And back to the show. And what were those conversations like, if I might, again, to the sense that you're comfortable? Yeah. What were those conversations like with the kids when you first sort of say, hey, this is what's going on? And how did you prepare yourself to approach them? Well, they could see. They have eyes and they are very, very astute kids, very astute because they not only see the physical change. There's a behavior that changes and all of us. You know, I'm hyper-vigilant. I became manic like in my vigilance because I had to not only make sure he was okay. I had to make sure we could keep the nurses because anyone who's had the privilege of having in-home care knows that the cycle of nurses and I found them during a pandemic and I found four men that were strong enough because Brian is six, two, two, twenty. And that isn't anomaly. I don't know how. I reached out to one doctor that I knew and I begged her, I said, please do not tell anybody but I need help in finding this. Don't tell them, I'm looking, don't you know, it was the most covert CIA operation known to man and I got very like we, you do lose nurses, especially during a pandemic and the understanding that I now have of caregiving for those who are in the caregiving position, they are left alone. I had no idea what to do. I didn't know how to do it. I didn't know who to call. Then there's pain management. You need to do it all on your own. Yeah, because the caregivers need care themselves. Yeah. Absolutely. And I am so grateful to them but there is the toll of mental health. It was both for me and absolutely for Brian and most importantly, the kids. And so when I would bring things up to them back to your question, well, it was when they asked and when I could see them see it and ask them what it is that they want to do in this situation. How do you want to handle what you just saw or where you are here? And Louis handled it very different than Lila. About two years before Brian passed, it was, he saw it was a dynamic that wasn't healthy for him to be around. So he's very evolved. He's like, you know what? I'm here for you. I'm here for, you know, he's sort of, I didn't want him to become the man of the family at the age. That's not my job is to be both at that time. And I want him to be a kid during a pandemic when everything is already fucked anyway and people are suffering everywhere. So me asking for help, it already, I felt the guilt because everyone else was already suffering. But he chose to just sort of be there and support and help me on the things that were easy. But he smartly disengaged himself and said, this is a safer space for me to sit and sit. Absolutely you go. I got this. Lila on the other hand was more bonded until about six months out. And then she says, I, can you please say no when they call me over to go visit? And I said, absolutely. And I said, but if you do want to go visit, I will come with you and I will be right there. And if you tap out, I am right there. So how do the kids avoid the situation living in the house? The way that my house is, I was able to sort of wall off a whole section and make it a different entrance where it had an outside garden and all these kind of things where, because I wouldn't let anyone in and out of the house without severe COVID tests. There was a whole, no, no, no family was allowed to come unless you are over at the, you know, the hotel for a two weeks, because that's when it was. It was the two week thing for the long time. And just to make sure everyone was clean because I didn't want, I mean, a respiratory, you know, illness would have, would have taken them out. I mean, to add, to add that on top of this, you know, what you're dealing with already in and of itself, the pressure and all of that stuff and the kids and trying to manage all of that and, and Brian, et cetera, and then to add that unknown and, of course, none of us really knew what that was when it was happening at the time. And everybody's, now we sort of look back and we're all Monday morning. Well, that makes sense why she was great. Look at my skin. I'm like, I am now gray, no, no, but, but I mean, that is, that is your, your juggling so many big ticket items at once, emotionally, that, that, you know, the, the idea that you on top of all of that, that you're duty bound to not express the, the pressure that you're under and to not be able to have an outlet for that, whether it's your good girlfriend's like Amanda or whomever and go, hey, this is what could just sharing that with another human being, relieve some of that weight with somebody who loves you. It is. Yeah. And I, I just didn't want to get them in trouble because I, I didn't, I just felt there was this black shroud over me going, if, if my curse, which is the minute I say something about this, I don't want anyone else to be blamed for something if they didn't you know, they wouldn't have said a word. They didn't end up saying a word once I did, I remember where I was like we, we had shot lost city. Love that movie. Love that movie. It was, it was fun, wasn't it? I love that movie. Oh my gosh. It's one of the funniest things. Joy and a sparkly jumpsuit, you know, and the hysterical chanting and Brad doing us the favor. And you pull the leeches off his ass in the second day of shooting. Oh my god. First day. First day shooting. I had no problem with that. Oh, yes, sorry, he's so gay, he's so gay. But I remember we were editing and it, it, it grinded already like, it was, it was already in a, in a bad place and I was in this room upstairs and I had the monitor and we're editing and Amanda and Jen were, and I don't know why we got on a call for something. And I think, if I look back on it, I would say it was Amanda and Jen going we need to spearhead because we need her to start talking and we need to talk. I think Amanda had, I don't even remember anymore. But I remember they came on and it makes me start crying. I saw their face and Jen's kitchen, you know, her little desk and her little kitchen behind her where we always all, we all get our food. And I just saw them because they didn't really speak. They just got on. They were like, hi. And I could tell and I was just like, it was relieved to go, I don't care what happens at this point. I need that and it was, it was amazing. And but I did panic once I did it because I was like, and I said, I hate that I'm having to say this, but I have the fear of God in myself that if this gets out, I can't follow through this journey and take Brian to where I know he's going and where I know I can take him, you know, and help him and help him. So it was, you know, the most important thing were the kids, period. What was the, what was the thing behind, I mean, again, if I may and we can cut it, why, why was it so important that you were under this sort of this gag order, if you will, to not say that you'd have to ask Brian. But I think where he was in his journey, both physically and mentally, I started grieving Brian four years before he passed, like something, and I said, start the grieving now because I knew I would be the caregiver. And I could see like the bright eyes that I knew, literally, like you say, you know someone through their eyes and there was something that had shifted and I go, it is a traumatic diagnosis. Anyone who can prevail through a diagnosis like that, I bow down, bow down. You know, my mother had cancer, we always had hope. You always have hope that there's something, you know, but I could see that there was a darkness and in mind you also, you know, he'd been sober for 14 years and you need medication. And I'm like, I don't give a shit, give him what he needs. It's like the man is suffering, give it. And so this, That selfish part of me, my person left a lot earlier than the body left. And I had to, I don't think I ever dealt with that until after he passed because you're just on this treadmill, you know, I had to release a film at the same time and talk about gray. I saw myself on the red carpet and I was like, you just look at my face and I am, I'm a woodblock. Well, it's similar to Alzheimer's because I would say my mom, you know, anybody suffering from being a caretaker with someone with Alzheimer's is they die twice, just like you're saying. Yeah. The mental part goes and then you mourn that so that you prepare yourself more when the physical goes. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well, Sandy, I don't know if you were aware of any massive growth in yourself during all of this incredible challenge, but I bet you've had time to reflect on it now, is it, was there, as I think you actually started saying this, like you wouldn't have what you have today, and I'm sure you were mentioned, you were meaning inner sort of strength and all that stuff. Had you not gone through the adversity you've gone through over the past few years and beyond. Like what have you, have you noticed that you've like become this superhero, like the things you can take on now, I would imagine would be just like what could you not, yeah, what could you not handle? I'm not handled. Yeah. Right. Anything with my kids, you know what I mean, it's like I, I'm always a shoe's going to drop. I'm not a look at the life through. I'm going to be really calm. But you're not a pessimistic person. You're like, you're so consistent. I'm a repair light and full of sunshine. You're always incredibly well prepared. You're just like, like if we were, if we needed to mount a war and I'd to pick one friend to who's going to be the general, like, right, so, but, but we'll, like, but you will like it. That's what I mean. Not me. Before, before you were like that, you're on top of that. You just, you got, but by the way, remember Sandy used to drive, Sandy used to drive by my house. We lived on the same street until a couple, until last year. And then she texted me and she got, are you ever going to water the plants on the upstairs? This is incredible house. And there are these gorgeous window boxes in these dead brown ass mines hanging up the thing. I'm like, dude, you're leaving your house. Look up. We're going to pull back in after the full drop. That is ugly. Like, Sandy, what do you think, like, what are you, are you, like, do you, are you looking at the rest of your life? It's like, okay, I've got this incredible sports car, you know, at my disposal, what roads can I drive it on? I'm sorry for the metaphor there, but like we all love cars, we love cars. No, you know what? That actually is a really great metaphor because I am oddly a very fear, fearful person. I am, and I think that's probably, you know, why you all, why you all chose comedy is because it's a great leveler. It makes comfort in your space, in an unknown space, very quickly. And if you go, if I make people feel comfortable at my expense, I, I'm, you know, I can get the lay of the land. Yeah. Yeah. What almost relaxes you. Yeah. You know. And so, so the thing with my journey with Brie is that I, you know, I didn't stop feeling guilt for as a mother with my kids until I'd say about a year ago, oddly, like there was things that I didn't process. I didn't kill because you didn't think you were there enough for them. Because it happened. Because it happened. And then someone said to me, you know, if you believe children choose you, they also choose this journey. Yeah. This this journey is for them as well. Oh. And I went, okay, thank you. Thank you. I sort of took a little weight off my shoulders, but you, as a mom, you go, I'm sorry that this happened, you know? And he had his family. Yeah. Because think about how much can be put in front of them now with, with arguably the higher lives in front of them. Yeah. That's the center of the lining. That is not going to knock them on balance. That's a great balance. You guys have gotten really good at this. You guys are like really grown up now. Well, it's true and they can, and you can, yeah, because you can kind of go two ways with it, because I think that there is, and we live in a world now where we're able to talk about stuff and maybe a generation ago or more, things would happen that would be traumatic and you don't deal with it. You don't talk about it yet. And that trauma sort of surfaces in other ways. But we live in a world now and I know the way that you are in talking about, talking to your kids and being open, you give them such a better chance for this to become their superpower. That's right. And if you weren't, I grew up with a very strong mom. And because of all my trauma and all the bullshit that I grew up with, if I didn't have a strong mom, I wouldn't have been, I wouldn't have learned how to navigate life. And because you are such a strong mom, if you weren't as strong as you were, Alilah and Louis, you know, may have gone in a different direction, but they are steadfast like they're on the right path because of you. They know who they are. That's a great book. Because I look at my kids and I go, we had dinner last night with three of Louis friends and they're, we're just talking and I go, he knows himself so well because I said, what is everyone grateful for? And he says, just to be alive, just to have this life and I went, oh my God, you know, and Alilah's fearless in being who they know themselves to be versus their mom who's only come to that. I'd say in the last year and a half, two years, just sort of now I can stop in life and I now look back and I go, wow, look at all this shit that happened. Yeah, but think about all the things that they've been able to observe you handle. Because I mean, I think, you know, as good appearance as we try to be and the things we try to say that are smart, it really is so much about example. They really pick up so much from just watching and they think about the stuff they've seen you go through. Yeah. I'm a lucky one. I'm a lucky one. You both are. But there's so, as Jason said, they're so lucky to see you go through it and to be again, to be open and set that example, that's going to just help them to grow even more as people and become great people. And I, isn't it an interesting at this age like to continue to feel like I was saying to somebody the other day, I feel even more now than ever, I feel like I'm just firmly in the student section. Right. Right. It's like, I'm just learning, you know, it's fucking crazy. I don't know anything. I said the other day, I'm a recovering know-it-all. It's great. You were. You were. But now you're not done. Thank you. It's true. My sister, for my birthday, gave me this beautiful little pewter box and it said, Leo Nutter Da Vinci, a quote by him at like 87, he says, I'm still learning. And I went, that's why I think, I'm glad you said it because I have just such happiness in my chest. Yeah. Other things can frustrate me. Things can upset me. I get pissed off. I get petty. There's a, I'm so happy and I feel like I'm a kid for the first time in my life, as I'm seeing things that I've seen a million times before. But now I see them with such like a love that I didn't have before. And it's just, you know, yes, I have a great therapist, yes, I think I did the right thing with the kids. Yes, I did usher Brian out the way a human being deserves to be ushered out. And I, I didn't take care of myself then, but I so take care of myself now. There was a moment when I just wasn't feeling great. I'd gotten COVID after we did the, the press job and I was like, oh, shit, what am I going to do? So I'm in a room above the nurses where they are and I'm bubble wrapping myself and running because I still had to cook dinner for the nurses, you know, so I mean, all the kids go away and I'm bubble wrapped and I'm, you know, near service and then I just didn't feel right afterwards and I was like, you know, as a woman, I'm like, something is wrong. And I said, oh my God, if all this dress gave me like cancer, I'm going to be, that's when I'm going to get mad. Not anything else is that I'm going to be pissed if I've made myself sick and I remember being in the doctor going, she sees me coming all amped up and wrapped in bubble wrap. You know, and I said, if I'm okay, I swear to God, she goes, you'll take care of yourself now. And I said, yes. I swear to God, I will. And when she, she called me up, she goes, you're fine. And I was like, newly sunlight, you know, and it was seeing your own body break down sort of was the big messenger. Yeah. And you like it, you got like a second chance. Yeah. Totally. Totally. Oh, that's so great. We'll be right back. And now back to the show. You know, it's so funny that you started but early on you were saying that, you know, everything happens for a reason and sometimes it doesn't. But if you think about it, even just now hearing you say all that, the sort of the flip side of this really tragic time in your life and obviously in Brian's life and his passing all that stuff, the flip side of it is, again, what we talked about, the growth and the universe that turns out, didn't serve you more than you could handle it, never does. You focus, you did all the right stuff, you did it the right way, you honored him, you stay connected to the kids and help them navigate through it. Think about how great that is. And now as you sit here and you say you're so happy in it, you can see it, Sandy, you are a different person. It's incredible. And so in a way, it does happen for a reason, you know. Well, that reasoning happened. for me, for my growth, you know? Yeah, yes, absolutely. And I mean, I do see the bigger reason in all of this is that I had all this information that no one was able to give to me for the caregiver. And it's like apparatus is tricks. How do you get a wheelchair up and downstairs? Oh my God, Amazon. You're like, say what you want about Amazon? Amazon saved my life. And because I had to quietly do it. And the office was like, why are you ordering ramps? Oh, the kids want something to go up and down the stair. You know, like at the lies that I told, but-- Will has ordered so many stuff secret off of Amazon. It's crazy. They come in a little brown packet. Only a lot of ramps. Remember, we used to go by a drive by an LA Bezos' house, which wasn't too far from the corner. In a very different situation. And I'd see the Amazon trucks parked in front. And you're like, oh, why? I also want to go to the driver like, hey, man, handle this one with care, bro. Really careful, you know who those are. Well, Sandy, most of us got to know you before we got to know you through what you do on screen. Yeah. And how nice, Jason. How nice. Yeah, here I come. How-- From the release date. Oh, no. For actual magnitude. Bringing this full circle of love. We also talked about first and foremost since we were talking about kids. How fabulous Jason's kids are. Like, I feel like if there's a child missing, I took them. Yep. I took them. Yeah, Franny's here in Iceland with me, completing the-- Yeah, she's been with me for the whole shoot. And now we're finishing up together. It's great. And Maple-- Maple. Maple, Maple's with Wyla. Yeah. That's so great. Yeah. So cool. We're going to see them a week. Maple and Wyla have grown up together in the things that they have done. Oh, my god. They are. But you had a fan question, Jason. Yes, she's trying to deflect. I'm going to bring it back to her. Where does that incredible other part of you that we haven't even talked about yet, this incredible presence on screen? Where does that-- what role does that play for you? No pun intended in your life now? What do you mean? Well, work wise. Yeah, what work represented before a lot of these challenges was probably one thing. And does it play a different role for you now and going forward as far as the challenge that it presents you, the release that presents you, the family that presents you, or any of those things? You don't need to stack them all and order them all. But what's the first thing you think about now when you think about doing what you love to do? I mean, yeah, I mean, you're right. It is chapters. When I didn't have kids, it was like three, four films a year. And I was just so happy to work. You're a working actor. It's like, I'll take it. I'll fix it. I'll try and make lemonade with some of them. And other ones were surprised, benefits and successes. And then I started producing. And then I felt I had more control over the narrative. Or just the quality going, if it's going to fail, it's going to fail because I failed, not because I had no control. And then I had kids and everything shifted. Everything stopped. I don't look at my career as-- I mean, I wasn't supposed to work this long. Every penny that I had went into real estate, I was like, well, I'm good at this. I can restore and lease it out. And then I'll have something to do. And that's why I obsessively just put every penny into a structure that I could restore and bring to life. Very smart. And then the kiddies came. And then they are my life and work a second. And that's period. And because it's just me, I've always been a single parent. And then when Brian got sick after Lossi, I was like, I thought I was going to have a little bit of a mental issue. I was like, I can't. I can't. I mean, the last-- what was funny, but not so funny, was the very last shot of our film in Lossi City. We couldn't shoot when we were in the DR. And we had to reshoot like a couple months later on. And I came home and I was just full on lifting care to all the things that you do. And I came for the reshoot on a couple of hours of sleep. And I remember walking in. And everyone went, did you not sleep? I looked so bad. And when I say so bad, my face, it was horrific. And I could maybe manage four hours of the reshoot. And they were like, can you just give us one else? I can't. I got to go home. I got to go home. And I went home, the amount of money that they had to spend to fix my face, to match the rest of the film. Digitally, it was a horror show. And I have good friends that are in the hair and makeup department. And I'm like, OK, there's not enough putty to tackle that thing. So I did that. And then I just pulled the plug. I said, I can't anymore. I have nothing to give right now, nothing zero. But then you turned to a practical magic was the next big thing that you took on. And took on a lot of it. You could have narrowed your scope of work on that if you wanted to. I'm not able to narrow my scope. That's really the truth. I can't. Well, you're so good at taking on a ton. And you succeed at everything that you take on. But I mean, that's kind of why I'll ask the question in a different way. Like, what are you looking forward to doing next, work-wise, and-- Comedy, I want to do funny. I want to do something that goes back to a time where you can tell a story and let humor be the thing. Like, they used to make films like that. I know. They had pathos and humor and fun and weren't slapsticky. Like, I can't do that. I'm good in between a rock and a hard place. Like, I want life to be tricky because it is. Life has 17 different tones. In the course of 24 hours, I've been witness to it. Right. And the humor comes from the challenge is that the characters go through as opposed to the jokes that they say. Totally. Yes. Right. And I watch back the things that would happen during the course of the day, even with Brian. I'm like, the sweetest moment was there was this beautiful trainer that I'd hired for the kids just to be there in the PE during homeschooling in the backyard. And he was so buff and fabulous. And then I went, I should probably do something. I should probably move. And he's like, OK, so we'd be outside, masked, 90 degree weather, doing exercises. And he finally said, you know what? I just want you to lie down on the sports court for a second. I'm just going to play some wave noises and some, you know, wail noises, you know. And I said, OK, OK, because just lay down for a second because I was really manic. Yeah, yeah. And so I lay down, he goes, I'm just, you know, and then all of a sudden my phone rang. And I sit up because when my phone rang, that means I had to run to that room over there and help the nurses with something. And I got up so full of rage and I went, I just want five minutes to sleep. And then I ran into the house, fixed the lunch, fixed whatever it was they got, whatever the minute it was, gave it to them and run back to the sports court. And I laid it back down and I go, OK, I'm going to do it and he goes, we're done. I go, no, no, no, please, please, just give me, I said, it was only five minutes. He goes, you have been asleep for 45 minutes. He goes, I had to go up and see if you were still breathing. I thought you had to, I just passed out. And I go, the fact that he gave me this little safe space to pass out on a sports court with my little mask in 90 degrees, you know. And it's like, if you can, it's like, we can figure it out, it's, there's nice people out and he didn't know what was going on either. He just knew that the mom to these kids was dealing with something, but he gave me grace to just, he knew I was unraveling and he was like, this, this lady needs some help. Speak, yes, I want to, we're running out of time and I just want to make sure you can leave us in them. these four people are going to be like, this is a domestic show. - No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no >> No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. I just so uplifted it. But, but, but this I wrote down and I wanted to make sure that's it because the chickens you have, you name them after female comedians accept. >> He's like, we have Wuppie Goldberg and we have the Golden Girls and- >> So one's named Carol Burnett, one's name's Wanda Sykes and another's name is- >> Phyllis Diller, yeah, but she was a rooster originally. >> Yes, Phyll Diller, you being Phyllis Diller, but he was all Phyllis. And we should have just kept it Phyllis because he was, he was proud- >> Yeah, he was a sass- >> He was a sass- >> He was proud, he got that white hair, he was, oh, he was, yeah, he was fresh. >> And then talk about- >> Not fresh hasn't I ate him, I didn't- >> But then talk about these dogs, like that I said in the opening, which made me laugh. >> You had two rescue dogs, Poppy and Ruby, Poppy with three legs. >> Poppy was my rider die, yeah, they say they're soul dogs. She was, she was a three-legged Chihuahua mix of some kind. She was the greatest human-like animal, like she, she was my protector, like if I had an issue, she would go after somebody to, like, she was, then there was Rubitela Versace, she walked on her hind legs and she always looked like she was working the runway. >> Julia, two legs. >> Two legs, she was on her hind legs. >> I love it, I love it because life wasn't hard enough, let me take care of these two dogs. >> And I had them for 14 years. >> It's unbelievable. >> Yeah, but you know what, it's like you need, you need a nice four-legged Golden Retriever and a sitcom. >> You know what, that's what the kids asked for. Once the dogs died, they said, can we get a dog that chases a ball? And I'm like, sure. >> And then I get, I rescue this poodle who'd been part of a puppy mill for like three years, they shoved spoons down her throat to collapse her vocal cords. She had all kinds of emotional issues. Couldn't care less about a ball, couldn't care less, like she's my dog. And then I was like, okay, well, she's got, my dogs have to have an impediment, you know. We just can't have a straightforward, really simple, loving, good listening dog. And then there was a dog that was re-homed and he was about 10 months old and I go, anything wrong with him? And there was like, when he's got four legs, he loves a ball. And I go, okay, I'll give this to the kids. It'll be like, nothing's wrong, dog, kids, ball. Turns out he's blind close up. He'll run to it and then he'll leap right over and keep going. So he's very smart-sighted. Yeah, yeah, he's far-sighted. Get him some glasses. Yeah, I took him to a doggy ophthalmologist and they said, we can outfit him with goggles. I'm like, oh, hey, oh, no, you're not. No, please do that. No, please do that. But his eyes are just a little close and can you imagine the goggles? No, you have to do that. That's such a, I can't be seen in public with that. I just, that's just no. Let him be blind. How does he do that? How does he do the eye test? Like, when they're like, you want to read the fourth line, better one, better two, better two, better four. We're looking at the thing. Behead him, we had several tests. Yes, yes. All right, A or B, B, okay, now B, better fours, better fours, better fours, better fours. Sandy, Sandra, Bullock, we love you. Thank you for sharing all of that with us. Nice have a conversation with you. That's not around food. I mean, it's weird. Right. Man, but truly, I mean, we love you. I love you so very much. Thank you for being so open and sharing. Always, you know what? It's like the one thing that does come out of this is that you get information that you can give to other people that wouldn't have access to it. So I've had a good amount of people that I've met that said, you know, my, my mother has ALS. And I'm like, and I have the whole list of what to get during it. And I can pass off the list. And it's, it's just, I have the list. I'm lucky because I have the list. And there's people that need the list. So you guys will never need it, thankfully, but if you know someone that needs it, I got it. I love that. I love you guys. Thank you guys. Thanks, thanks from road adjacent, you from Emia Jason, you from Iceland, adjacent, give Francesca big smooch. Well, I'll see you, we'll see you in a week with me. Yeah, I'll see you guys when we see a good performance. We're going to see our girls perform. Yeah, that's great. Yeah. I love you so much. Thanks for sharing and always, always, always, always. Bye, honey. Bye. I see you soon. Love you. Well, well, I feel uplifted and, um, I mean, I, I, I, why do I love it when I cry on this, on this damn podcast, it's so joyful. But like, even when I cry, it feels joyful. I just, she's just incredible. Well, like you said, you know, those are the times when it's dark and just awful. Those are the moments that life gives you to learn from and grow from, right? You don't know it in the moment, but later on, you know, it's, it's, it's, it's such a gift in a way. It's horrible in the moment, but a gift later on the people that have been so generous to share some of these things with us on this show. Like, I was just thinking about Michael Lewis. Yeah. That incredible story he told us. And, um, and there, there's, there's been a few or I found myself getting weepy in such a joyful sort of setting as this is sometimes. But, um, yeah, I just, I feel so lucky, um, to have her, uh, as a friend and to, to hear her stories and to watch her go through what she goes through and she, she could have told another hour on another, um, really trying episode that she's been through in her life. And then another hour and another hour, and I mean, it sound like, you know, she was sandy because, um, you know, she's certainly had, uh, incredible fortune in her life as well. But man, the way she goes through this life, um, I, I forget because she always does shower us with so much sunshine when we're around. Yeah. Right. Really forget like, yeah, the, the, the, the, the, the feet are paddling like hell underneath the water sometimes with some of these things and, uh, it's really admirable. And it really goes to show really highlights that you, you never know what people are going through. Uh, this is one of those things that you think about like when you go through the world and you say, like, somebody's cuts you off of their being an asshole. And now as I get older, I go, I don't know what their days like. I don't know what they're going through. Yeah. I don't know what pressure they're under. I don't know where they're coming from. And, and, and, and you can call me. I probably know. Yeah. I know that you can tell a lot of people. Sure. Yeah. But, but as you say, JB, the next time I have questions about, uh, Matt, uh, fat content and milk on that come to you. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You never know how much you never know fat content. You can solve a lot of problems. Yeah. It's tricky. For sure. Yeah. You just, you know, all me, I mean, you know, I probably know a lot. I think that probably when you're, when you're sitting in front of the dairy, I'll, uh, Sean, and you're presented with the option of all these different, I know, say, you're probably, you probably just don't know which one to buy. Smartless is 100% organic and artistically handcrafted by Bennett Barberco, Michael Grant Terry, and Rob Amjurff. Smartless.