Sadie Robertson: How to Stop Needing Everyone to Like You

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What have you learned over the years from where true confidence comes from? You're not going to get your confidence by hitting a certain number of followers, by having enough comments that tell you you're awesome, enough likes. It has to be. Deeper than that. I know earlier this year, you guys had a terrifying season and experience with one of your daughters. Yeah, it was deeply terrifying. She completely started to turn blue. It was literally the most terrifying moment of our life. CPR, whole nine yards, ambulance was calling. Two weeks later, she choked again. I have never had to have this much dependency on the Lord as I have in this season of my life. One of the most common questions I get asked is, well, what's God's will for my life? Like, how do I know what God's will is for my life? I want to encourage you by saying, you don't and you won't. 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Tickets are on sale right now at BryceCrawford.org. Or click the link in the description below to grab your seats. And please, the only way to buy is through this official site. I recommend not trusting any random resellers. I genuinely believe that this is going to be a night people carry with them for a long time and I'd love to see you there. All right, let's get into this episode. What's going on, guys? Welcome back to another episode of the Bryce Crawford Podcast. I'm Bryce and today I am with Sadie Robertson-Huff. I'm so stoked. This is awesome. Is it weird that nobody ever adds the Huff on the end? Yeah. I put the Huff out there. I'm like, I'm Sadie Robertson-Huff, okay? I'm throwing it out there to the world. But I get it. I mean, because my family was known, I feel like Robertson just kind of stuck for everybody and my Instagram's like Sadie Robb. But I have definitely put the Huff. I mean, the Huff's on the book, okay? Yeah, it's there. The Huff's out there. I like Huff. I mean, if I was a girl and my husband was Christian, I would want the Huff too. Exactly. And you and Christian are bros. We are. I appreciate that. Yeah, y'all, the other day I walked outside. It was like 10 in the morning and I was going to ask Christian something and y'all were on FaceTime. Or was it in the morning? Yeah, I was getting that wisdom. And I was like, hey. And y'all were just like straight up in a like bro iron sharpening iron. And it was awesome. Yeah, he was dropping the wisdom on me. It was epic. It was really cool. So, okay, before we get into this. So when we were at Movement earlier this year, that was the first time I'd ever met Willie. And he punched me so hard when you were preaching. He punched you? I say like punch, but you know how like, you know how like country people are like really, you know, they're expressive and, you know, they got that thing. You were preaching some heat and he hit me so hard when you said something like he grabbed me on the shoulder because he was sitting next to me. He was writing notes and he would lean over to me like every now and then and be like, that's right. Like, that's my daughter. She's going crazy. And then at the end, he like hit me really hard and like grabbed me on the shoulder and was like, that's how you preach a sermon, son. And then he got up. I walked away. That was the last time I saw him at the conference. And I was like, wow, this is awesome. Every time people say that I was just with your dad, I'm just bracing for what they're going to say because my dad is so funny and he is that guy. Like he just, he's like everybody's friend, you know, and he's just a good guy. But you know what was so sweet about that? So you said he was taking notes and he actually wrote me a letter, which was like so sweet during that sermon about like just preaching the gospel and legacy. And his dad had wrote him something like a letter in his book, Gospeler, about like preaching the gospel right before he passed away. And that letter like means a lot to him. And so he was like, I want to write you a letter about preaching the gospel. And it was like really, really cool. I don't know why I just wanted to share that because that was just an interesting thing. Like he's never done that before. And I was thinking people might be like, oh, your dad was taking notes for your sermon. That's so sweet, which is sweet, but it was really cool because he actually wrote me this letter that now I have about like preaching the gospel and doing the thing. So it was really cool. Well, he was so in your corner. I mean, he was hooting and hollering from the seat. It was awesome. It was so cool. But yeah, he, and I love how unimpressed he is by people. Oh, yeah. Like that is such a good quality to have. Yeah. But yeah, he was hilarious. So he just, he hit me really hard and then walking away, that's the last time I saw him. Then I think he went to like a Luke Bryan concert. It was like, it was like, so yeah, he was, he was so fun. He's so funny. Someone said this the other day, they were like, your dad is such a, like when he walks around, he has like the bandana and the boots and like security guard. I'm like, yeah, you must've seen him at a like event or something because actually he does not have aura. Like when we're at a hotel, he'll literally straight up go downstairs in his pajamas, no shoes on, hair crazy. Like people have often mistaken him as homeless. So it just makes me laugh because I'm like, yeah, there's the Willie Robertson and then there's like his country roots, like who he is. So that's just funny. Well, I long to have facial hair like him because I think that's where I'm at. Well, hey, Christian thought he would never be that guy and he's that guy now. So it's possible. But he's got like the thick beard. I'm just not committed to using like all the tools, you know, like the old beard oil and all that stuff. I'm just like, I'm not really into that. I don't know if I see that for you. I feel like your look is good. Well, I just tried to grow out a goatee. Did you? You could only see if the light hit it right though because it's blonde. You know, it was like really bad. It was really bad. Anyways, anyways. Nonetheless. I'm curious to know, because when you were, I think you were 14 or something when Duck Dynasty came out. And I'm just, what was it like having so many people know who you are and know a lot about your life at such a young age? Yeah, it was, you know, it's crazy though. Part of me wants to say, oh, it was so crazy. But the other part of me is like at 14, I didn't realize that people didn't know who we were as much because we lived in Louisiana. We were almost sheltered from how massive the show was at first. I remember hearing, you know, the numbers and that it's doing really well. And, you know, obviously knowing that it was doing well because of that. But we stayed in Louisiana, so we didn't see it as much. Now my parents, they're going all out and about. They're doing events and stuff. And so they were seeing it more. So my life didn't change as much that first year, even though the show exploded the way that it did. But I remember come the following year, probably by the time I was a sophomore in high school, we started filming. A lot for the show. And at this point was when even in my hometown, things started to change. Like people were showing up to my basketball games. People were showing up to track meets. People were just like showing up. And it was like, oh, this is weird. Like, this is interesting. I remember going to Walmart and like our family was just everywhere in Walmart, like all over the TVs, but not even just that, like products all in Walmart and just like slowly realizing, oh, wow, this is really a big deal. And then by the time I was 17, that's really whenever my life really changed because I was a junior in high school at this point. And that's whenever I was on Dancing with the Stars. I feel like before then I was kind of in the shadow of my family and I don't say that in like a, oh, poor me. I was, that was fine. I was just, you know, grateful to be a part. And just in my family, I was just the Duck Dynasty kid. People would come up to me and be like, oh, are you Willie's daughter? Are you the Duck Dynasty girl? But like, people didn't know who I was. But Dancing with the Stars, it was like, whoa, now there's this spotlight on you. I'm me. And that's whenever I think it got more hard because that's whenever my life really like got shaken up. Now there were so many blessings in that too, but I feel like I felt the effects of fame at that point more than I had before because I was just in a famous family. And then all of a sudden it was like, oh, we know you. And that was crazy. - What was it like at school? Like what did people think around you at school? Were they hype about it? Were they not hype about it? - I gotta be careful 'cause my 10-year reunion's coming up and I'm definitely going. - Wait, you're gonna go to your school reunion? - Heck yeah, I'm going to my school reunion. - I didn't even know they still did those. - Oh yeah, I'm making Christian go too. We're going. It'll be fun, it'll be sweet. But there's so much, so many people that I love and I'm so grateful for. But at the time it was actually really, really hard. I had gone to the same school since I was in pre-K. It was one of those schools where you're like K through 12, 12th grade, and so we really like grew up together. And I was known by the same group of people all the way until I was, you know, at the stage of the world knowing me. And it felt really hard because I feel like everybody was like, oh, you know, you're changing, you're changing, this is changing. And people started to not like that. And in my mind, I'm like, I'm not changing. Like, my life is changing, but I'm not. Like, I need friends. I need help. I need community. And it just felt like they did not understand what I was going through. And now I look back and I'm like, how could they? Like, that was so crazy. It's different if you live in L.A. and, like, you're famous. A lot of people are. When you live in Louisiana and all of a sudden there's, like, this massive spotlight on your family and your life looks different, it's not necessarily received the same way. It's because it's so out there. It's so different. And so it was super hard. Like, I remember just, like, little things that were hard. I remember, like, after dance school starts, coming back to school and someone being like, hey, no one wants to hear about it. Like, don't mention it. And I remember being like, what? Like, that was just, like, so weird. And then I realized, oh, people really don't want to hear about it. Like, people were so rude about it, so mean about it, did not talk about it. I remember this comedian came to our school and it was, like, for our prom thing, but it was just, like, a banquet at the school I went to. And he was making jokes and he, like, made this joke about me being in dance with the stars. And it was, like, crickets. Like, it was the most awkward. I just wanted to, like, run and hide. And then I was still playing basketball. So like people were showing up to my games with like duck calls. And every time I would dribble, they would quack and they would like, it was just, it was brutal. Like, and I, I know that's silly, but I remember just like crying during halftime and being like, this is not fun anymore, you know? And so that was a really interesting time in my life because I say it like this. It was like, everyone knew who I was, but I didn't even like know who I was. And so it was messy, like really struggled with anxiety, insecurity, um, a lot of things that most high schoolers struggle with, but just on, in an interesting way. And so, you know, looking back though, I can see how the Lord used it. And I think now the reason I preach the way that I preach, right, the way that I write podcasts, the way I podcast is like, I'm trying to be there for people who feel those same ways. Like those, that anxiety. That insecurity. And that's why I always say like, I never wanted to be famous. I never tried to be famous. I'm trying to be a sister and a friend to those who don't have one because when I was famous, I didn't feel like I had that. And so that was just, yeah, a super crazy time of life. High school was so weird. It was so weird. It is for so many people, but that dynamic made it really interesting. Yeah. What, what actually changed in your everyday life once things, because you, you were talking about how people were saying you were changing, you were changing when really nothing was changing. Yeah. What, what stuff actually had to change? I think the truth is like my life did change completely. I just didn't feel like I changed. And I think that was the struggle. It was like, oh, I can see that everything has changed, but I'm still me. Like I still, I just want to be friends. I just want to hang out. But it's really, I, now I look back, I'm like, how weird was that? I was just on Disney with stars. Now I'm just trying to go to lunch, like at the lunch table. Like it's, that is weird. I give it to them. Like that is weird. But like for me, we were filming our show. So I literally missed. It's 75 days of school, like 75 days of school. So we had to have a separate tutor. So I'm going to school, but I'm filming the next day. So I'm hardly ever there. Like my life looked so different than it did the year before. Like my life totally changed. I was going to events with my parents and going to different, like, I'm sure from social media, it looked a certain way. I mean, looking back, oh, Facebook has a way of humbling you that, that dang app when it's like 10 years ago today, you said this. And I'm like, good Lord. No wonder why people didn't like me. Cause it's like, it'll be like 10 years ago today. And I'm like at some event and I'm like, and it looks like I'm bragging. Like, it looks like I'm like, look at what I'm getting to do. Where meanwhile, I'm like, I can see what it looked like now at that time. I didn't realize that. So I'm like, why does everyone think my life is so different? And I'm like, oh, well, yeah, because look at what I was sharing on social media. And so, you know, time has a way of humbling you as well as social media has a way of humbling you. But yeah, it was just. It was wild. My life did change. And I think I tried to, I didn't want it to, I wanted to say the same because it felt scary to change. But at the end of the day, it was, it did. Yeah. It just did. When you said the Facebook thing, I thought you were talking about, uh, do you ever see those like AI news things about like the Christians, but it's like totally fake. Yeah. You know what I'm talking about? AI on Facebook is out of control. Every time I get on, it's like my uncle died. My, every time it's like uncle side died. He didn't. He's still living. He's still thriving. Um, it's like my parents had adopted another child. I look like a completely different person. I'm like crying over something like AI is crazy. I'm like, no, I'm talking about no AI. I'm talking about straight up. You posted this 10 years ago. Nobody edited that. And I'm like, Oh Lord, why did I do that? How did, how did being in that spotlight, I guess, from the show growing up influence your relationship with Jesus? Because I mean, your family was publicly Christian as well. Yeah. So, I mean, I can't even, I think, I guess when I think of like social media now, people like want to advertise their relationship with Jesus online. Some people do for maybe some people, good intent, some people with bad intent, but that's like a popular thing, but your whole family and then now your faith and growing up in that is being displayed online in front of people pre social media. What was that like? Yeah, that was definitely not a thing whenever we were. We were just starting, I mean, social media was barely a thing. I remember getting Instagram, like my seventh grade year, I think, and we started filming the show eighth grade year. So it was around. And when I say I was getting Instagram, I think like a lot of people were, it was like very new. TikTok was not around. Snapchat was very much so a thing, but you know, it was the earlier days where it's so different than it is now. And here's what I'll say about my family and our faith. There was never like a question of, are we going to share faith or not? I think. I think our family, that is genuinely who we are. Like our faith is number one, most important thing in our life. And that's something my parents always told us. If you're going to choose Jesus, that's not a decision you're going to make today and decide when or where you're going to share that. Like that's a commitment for your life that like he's the Lord of your life, you know? And so they would tell us like, if, if we get famous, that's what you're going to do. If you're not, especially if you go into your school, that's what you're going to do. Like, that's a decision that's a 24/7 relationship. And so not only did they tell it. Tell us that growing up. But then I really got to see them model that when their life changed, you know, and every scenario that they went through, their faith was the foundation of their life. And so I grew up knowing that, seeing that being impacted by that. And again, we grew up so different than what people's perspective of us is. We grew up in a very small town, Louisiana. My dad was a youth pastor. My mom was a children's pastor minister. And my dad did a lot of the maintenance at the summer camp that our family was a part of running. And then they decided to take on the duck call business. And so again, this is not like the dynasty fame cameras, like that was my life until I was in middle school. And so I grew up loving Jesus, loving the Lord and literally praying that like God would give me an opportunity to share someone who like, if someone never heard about Jesus, I want to tell that person about them because I didn't know anybody who didn't know Jesus. Everyone around me did. I was kind of sheltered in that way. And then when I was in seventh grade, this is so cool. And this is like. Oh Lord, this is so good. And when you look back at your life, you're like, Whoa, I can see how he was working. I got the opportunity to play basketball overseas and I, my parents couldn't afford to come. And so I had to like go by myself. So I went to Austria in seventh grade by myself. Didn't know any of my teammates until I got there. I know. Crazy. Seventh grade? Seventh grade. I was just like 13, went by myself and when I got there, like had to like fly all the way there. I was like, I can't. And looking back, I'm like, that was so crazy. However, the Lord so used it. So it was a junior Olympic thing going on. So it was like all these countries and I like met my team when I got there and none of them were believers. This is like my first time to be around unbelievers. And I remember like my teammate's name, her last name was Lazarus and I go, Oh my gosh, like, that's so cool. That's your last name. And she was like, why is that cool? Like, because like, Lazarus, you know, like who Jesus raised from the dead. She's like, Oh my gosh, that's so cool. Like, she was like, Oh, I don't know that. Like, I don't know. What is that? So I was like, Oh, this is so cool. So I tell her about the story. And then like over the next 10 days, we were there for 10 days, I got to like talk to people who had never heard about God. And it was like the most incredible thing for me to realize, Oh, my faith isn't my parents' faith. Like I really believe this. I'm across the world. They don't even know what I'm doing. I could do anything right now. And there are parties every night. There are things going on. I would go to the parties and I'd sit at the door and I'd wait for anyone who just wanted to talk. And I was like, Oh, this is so cool. This is what I believe in. This is what I feel passionate about. And, um, really cool. The coach ended up really encouraging me. She wasn't a believer, but she was like, I've never seen some, a kid come over and like stand for their faith. And I felt like the Lord just used that time to establish something in me. So going into Duck Dynasty, I was like, Oh, this is cool. I'm going to get to tell you about Jesus. You don't know about Jesus. Like I had that mindset. But then of course, you know, I was like, Oh, this is so cool. But then of course, I was like, Oh, this is so cool. But then of course, fast forward to 17 and now having like the biggest opportunity to and now I'm like more anxious than I've ever been, more insecure than I've ever been. it's like game time. And I'm like, oh gosh, I don't know if I can do this. And so the Lord met me in those places and like a messier way than you would have thought. Like on one hand, it might look like I was just like, yeah, going for it, Lord, I'm going to share them. And I did it. And I did do it in a lot of ways. And I'm thankful for that, but it was, it was a little messy. And yet at the same time, I look back at that 17, 18 year old space that was really dark for a lot of reasons. And I'm like, man, but that was where God met me, molded me, spoke to me. And the things that he spoke in that time are still the things I'm talking about 11 years later and what fueled me to do what I do. So it was definitely, God met me in such cool ways. Would you say that you were following Jesus in Austria or like following Jesus 17, 18, like which? I think that's a really good question. I think that I was following Jesus at 13 in Austria. I wanted to tell people about Jesus and I'd gotten, baptized right after I came back from Austria. And I was like, oh, I'm ready to like do this thing. But then when I was 17, I think, again, my life looked completely different than I was 13. Not just because I'm a 17 year old versus 13 year old. I was a small town kid, like parents, you know, youth pastors working at camp to like, oh, the whole, it felt like, like, they, like people know my name. I mean, when I was on Dancing with the Stars, I gained a million followers in a month. Like my life went like dramatically different. Oh my gosh. And so I, it was, it doesn't seem like rapid fame because I had technically been since I was 14, but it was rapid to me because again, I was just the kid. Now people know me. And I think that's whenever I like, so my life just changed a lot. And I was in relationships that were not healthy for me. I was, and it's not just the people I was dating's fault. I was, it was my fault. Like I did not, I wasn't living that godly lifestyle. The things that I had said and proclaimed and wanted to be the example. And I had now fallen in. So then I felt like a hypocrite and I'm like, I want to stand for Jesus, but I'm not even really living for him in my private life. So I wrestled with that. And, and so I just had like a, oh, okay, God, like I want you to use me, but can I still be used by you? Because I've messed this up. Can I still be used by you? Cause I'm so anxious and I have panic attacks about even just like getting on an airplane, how I'm ever going to. Preach like, and I didn't even think about preaching. Cause I'd actually never even seen a woman preach. I grew up in a really traditional church background. So like, I didn't even have any of that on the horizon. So I think at 17, 18, like dark, dark time of my life, wrestling it out with the Lord. But I think by like the end of that, like 18 year old self, I really feel like I understood what it meant to have the Holy spirit and like receive the Holy spirit. I didn't understand that before. Um, I went to church and I was like, I'm going to preach. I'm going to preach. I'm going to preach. I went through like repenting for things I need to repent for confessing things like changing, actually like changing my lifestyle and letting the Lord change it from the inside out. And so I followed him at a young age, but that was the time that I think I like surrendered my life to him. And I was like, like change me, mold me, use me for your glory. And, um, that was a, yeah, very, very, very pivotal difference. So that's a good question. No, I think, well, I think that's interesting. Cause I mean, I grew up, I went to private Christian school and I was like, never really, I was like a big stickler for the rules. I was just never like the guy that would just like break rules. So we, and then we had this thing where we would go on a mission trip the week before spring break with like, and it would either be, you know, citywide or statewide or countrywide. And there were just a few people that went like out of the country. And so I even know where I knew Jesus, I knew Bible verses. I knew the more moral standard of God. I, I would go and like tell people about Jesus. We were putting water filters and butt like attached to those home Depot buckets and these slums of different countries. And then, but it liked it at the end of the day for me, it was just like, Oh, I was just doing the, I was doing the right thing, even though I didn't, I wasn't really following Jesus. And I think that, I think it's easy to, I wanted to ask that because I think it can be easy sometimes to fall into this trap of like, Oh yeah. Well, like, you know, like I go to church on Sunday and I know Jesus. And like, that's what it looks like. And you hear things about God and you, you, you, you know, things about Jesus, but like you can't, you can't take away like, Oh no, I cried with Jesus. Like I confessed to him. Like he knows like inner parts of me. You can't, you can't take that away. That, that fascinates me. Is there, is there like a specific moment like at 17 that led you to be like, no, this is why I'm going. You know, it's so crazy. I just remember when you were talking, I remember hearing your testimony and I remember you were like, you hadn't said how old you were yet. And I was like, he's going to say he was 17. Like, I was just like, he's going to say he was 17. And wasn't it? You were 17. I was on, I was on winter break. Yes. So, and I think because I, I mean, everything you were saying, I related to so much. And I just remember that it was years ago when I heard you, you share that maybe at VU conference or something. And yeah, I was 17 and I went to the summer camp. I actually maybe had just turned 18. And, um, well, I'm 17 on December 1st. So then I just turned 18 when I went to the summer camp and I, it was a, it was like a different camp than what I had grown up in. It was more like non-nominational and I grew up in a, in a more, um, yeah, like I mentioned traditional background. So it was just going to like stretch me a little bit in how people worshiped and even just the way people had talked and everything. And I remember going into it and someone was like, Hey, this is, you know, this is what I'm going to do. And I'm like, okay, I'm going to do this. And I'm like, I'm going to do this. So I was like, okay, here I am, Lord. And I was, I was praying some messy prayers at the time. I was like, God, I was actually really mad at God. And I'm laughing because now looking back, I'm like, that is so funny to me that I like said those things to God, but he's so, he always say this. It makes me cry. He's so much more gracious than you think he is. He's so much more kind than you think he is. He's so much more for you than you think he is. Cause I was thinking, I messed this thing up. And, and I, and I was actually like, I don't even want to do this. Like, I actually don't even want to be this good example because I felt so burdened by it. And so again, like caught in this kind of lie. And so. Was that because of the pressure of like, oh, you know, we're all about Jesus and stuff like that. And then, you know, kind of what was going on. Yeah. It was like, people put me as like the poster child for Christianity and my lifestyle on the day to day that no one knew was really, really not that. And so I was, I mean, I remember being at an event one time and someone like asked me a question on purity and like wanted me to say all this. And I was like, I just felt like shame. Like, I was like, I don't, I don't want to answer that question. I don't want to be this person. I didn't ask to be this person. I'm, I'm not living a perfect life. I'm a teenager. I'm messing up. I'm not like, and, but of course I didn't say that, you know, I'm just like, yeah, we should be. And I said what I knew I should say. And then I just like ate me up and I'm like, oh, I hated that. And so I just felt so, burdened by it. And I was like, I don't want to, I don't want to be that. And it's so sad because I didn't want to be that. I just wasn't being honest. And so I remember praying to God. I was like, God, cause I was about to go into my senior year of high school and I didn't know what I wanted to do in life because everything I thought I wanted to do just got totally shaken up because now again, like these followers happen like super fast. And all of a sudden I'm getting all this opportunity in Hollywood, like, like really big opportunities. People were trying to cast me in an audition for like, people were just like, it was, it was like doors opening like crazy, but I didn't feel like that was the path I wanted to take. And then I didn't really know what the other path and alternative would be. Cause the other path is like, I go back to school and people don't like me. So like, what do I do? So I remember praying and being like, God, I don't, I don't want to be famous. Why did you do this? Like any other teenage girl would have wanted this. I just don't like you, you should have chose someone else. Like, why did you choose me? And here I am at this camp, like praying these prayers. I'm like, you're going to have to show me, like, show me how to do this. Show me what to do. And it was the first time I ever saw a woman preach. The woman that was preaching that night, her name is Alex Seeley. And she shared this message about David's anointing versus King Saul's anointing. And the whole message just spoke like, so, I mean, it was exactly what I needed to hear, but more than even what I needed to hear the way she said it, I was like, Oh, like I'm so impacted by her faith. And I thought to myself, like, what if I could do that? For other people? Like, what if, what if I could say words that really mattered and impact people about my faith? And I looked at my friend and I was like, maybe I'll like do something like, like that. Like that was so amazing. And I remember she laughed at me because she knew me and, uh, I had been doing like events because of Duck Dynasty and I hated them. I hated the microphone, hated doing stuff in front of people. Actually, the first time I ever spoke as like a 15 year old kid, as a Duck Dynasty kid, the people straight up asked for their money. And I was like, money back? No, true story. I was supposed to speak for 25 minutes and I only spoke for five because I had a straight panic attack. And I was like, God bless you. Goodbye. Like walk off stage. Wait, was it like a, was it like a sermon or was it like a supposed to be like an encouragement? And I was just like, I don't even know what to say. God loves you. Like, it was just like, Oh no, so awkward. It was for a Christian college. I got invited to speak. I didn't even know. I didn't have context for what they even meant. And so all I had to say, like for me to say that my friends don't even like, you don't do that kind of stuff. And I was like, yeah, but at the same time, same time back to, I've always wanted to tell people about Jesus. And when you go back to me at five years old, there's videos of me preaching on the countertop. Like I, that is who I am. But again, living in sin will make you question who you are. So now I'm like, I don't know if that's who I am. Here I am going, no, that's it. That's a picture of what I want to be. So then I feel, you know, when they do the altar call and everyone always says like, if your heart's racing and like you feel like nervous and this is you and I'm like, oh my gosh, my heart's like racing. And I'm like, it's like, I'm like crying, but this is a church camp, right? So it's really like, you're just like malnourished and like, and like everybody, like, but this is the thing, like everybody in there knew who I was. And again, I'm supposed to be this poster child for Christianity. And I'm feeling like I need to like respond to this altar call. Oh, I felt like, I felt like really embarrassed, like, but, but more than embarrassed, I felt convicted. And so I was like, okay, so I go to the front and I get on my knees and Yeah. I, when I tell you, Bryce, it was the coolest moment of my life. Like I will, I go back to that as the moment that really changed my life because I didn't even think at once I got to the altar, I didn't think about anybody else being there. And, and that was a big deal for me because I felt like for years I felt eyes on me, you know, like I, I knew people were watching me and I felt pressure by that. And I did not care in that moment. And I didn't even feel eyes on me. I literally just felt like God was, speaking to me. And one, I just surrendered my life to him again. I'd had before again. And I said, God, I don't really know what to do with this, but Lord, I want you to use me in any way that you want, want to use me. And that was the first time I ever felt like the Lord spoke to me and I'd never heard the Lord speak. And this was not audible, but I'm talking like to my heart. I knew the Lord said, I'm not calling you to be famous. I'm calling you to be a sister and friend to those who don't have one. And the Lord, showed me a vision. I never had a vision before. And the Lord showed me a vision of Instagram. And it was like my following increasing. And I was like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. And God said, not about you, about me. And it was like, to me that showed me, oh, I can use this for your glory. And so I started doing that. So I made like my first little YouTube video and I was like, no makeup, hair wet, like, Hey guys, here I am. And here's what I struggle with. And here's what I believe the Lord sees when he looks at us, not the outward appearance, but the heart. And to this day, that was actually like my most viewed video on YouTube. Um, I started doing things on social media. It's just like sharing the gospel. And I don't know how different it would have looked for people at the time, because again, I was being that light. I was being that, but it, everything was different in my heart. And I felt the freedom to do that. Now it wasn't running from the shame that I have felt from the ways that I was living. I was like, I was owning it. I was just confessing it to people. I was just being vulnerable. Yeah. And then I saw, man, people relate to that. And so one thing led to another and now I'm still doing that just in different ways. That's so cool. Was the church camp, like the kind of camp that would take your phones away? No. Okay. Cause I went to those. That's the camp I grew up at though. I went to those. And I love that. It was brutal. Yeah. Yeah. No. Well, I was curious because I think now, and that was something I really wanted to talk. One of the things I wanted to talk to you about today was like social media. Like we, we obviously try to use social media, uh, for God's sake. For God's glory. That's why, that's why we have the podcast. That's why we do certain things. And like, at least for me, the burden on my heart a couple of years ago were so many people were looking at bad role models that were being pushed. And so like, I can only speak from a guy's perspective. It's like, oh, there was toxic masculinity. There was, oh, get the Lamborghini, make all the money, get the girls, the lustful temptation, like everything being pushed. And so kind of like our heart was, well, if these people don't even want to go to church, like we got to infiltrate that so that you can kind of like kind of like, I don't know, maybe you can be the thing that hits beats, beats that to the punch or whatever. Um, but, but even, even then, like what, what are you kind of seeing as the biggest downfall of social media? Cause more and more every day I want to get it off my phone. No, so real. So true. I mean, I think that that there's a lot, you know, there's a lot of downfalls when it comes to social media and a lot of them have been the started and a lot of them are new to today's day. Like when we started, I would say like comparisons, obviously the number one, I think that still reigns true. I mean, you're seeing people's lives that they're living and you're envious, jealous, all this stuff, but not even just that. You see people's body. I mean like for women, the amount, uh, and obviously that's a struggle for men too, but women in their own way to see that and compare themselves. I remember at the time, like as a teenager, seeing couples that were like really, really cute, but kind of inappropriate, you know, and being like, those are everyone's goals. So do I need to be like that? Or if I'm going to get guys attention who's around me, then I need to like show myself in the way everybody else is. So like, yeah, all of that is there and still there. But then also now you have like the fight with the algorithm. So now it's like everyone's striving because you're like, well, I got to get, I got to produce, I got to, I got to get more content out. And they're trying to like gain this following for maybe their own glory, their own success. And then you're just like in this hustle and bustle of striving. So there's so many different things that come with social media. It's very hard to guard your heart. It's very hard to do it the right way. My approach to social media is this, like, I want to give something to it. I don't want to take something from it. And I think a lot of people go to social media to take, I want to receive likes. I want to receive the acknowledgement from other people. I want the algorithm to love me. I want to take, take, take, but I'm like, no, I don't need anything from social media. I'm filled. I'm satisfied. I got living water. I don't have to keep going back to empty wells. So when I go to social media, I'm going to give something to it. I'm going to bless people. I'm going to encourage people. I want when people to see my page, they feel better about themselves. They see something about my life that they go, man, that's kind of cool. I've never thought about that in that way. I want to, I want to know Jesus more because she knows Jesus. She seems like she's, you know, content with life or whatever. And so, yeah, I think, I think about the woman at the well, because I think it's like going back to the well for water. That's actually like going to keep making you come back for more. And yet Jesus says, Hey, you don't have to keep coming back to this well that's empty. I can give you something today that will satisfy your soul, that you're never going to have to, you know, come back for more. This is living water. And I feel like once you taste and see that, then you can go back to those wells and you can bless other people with the overflow that you have in your heart. And so I feel very passionate about that for other people. Cause if, if imagine that the world approached social media, like we're going to give something to it, not take, you would have a completely different algorithm. You have a completely different feeling when you scroll, when you get something. And so I feel passionate about that. I actually wrote a whole book, not this book, but called, who are you following? About the importance of who we follow in social media, how we approach it. It's kind of a messy one because I felt like not a lot of people are speaking to how to do social media the right way. And what is the right way? Christian and I talk about this all the time, you know, like what's the right way? Like, how do you do it well? And so I wrote that book as an attempt to, you know, encourage people to just think about it. Like, how can we do this the right way? How can we do this and be a light in the midst of the darkness of Jesus says like, you are the light of the world. Do that. And so I don't think the answer is like delete it. I think there are times that you need to delete it to like take maybe mental cleanses and stuff. But I think it was like, okay, how do I do this right, Lord? Like use me in such a way that I would actually be the light in the world. Use me in such a way that I would bless people and not take from people. Use me in such a way that I could encourage people on this little app that they spend so many hours scrolling through. That is such an encouragement in my heart. Cause that was why, that's why I hate it. Cause I found so much time that I was wasting on it and how subconsciously, how much like I would just open up my phone and go to it automatically, even after just getting off of it. And so the amount of times that I'll delete it to be like, oh, it's gone. And then I'll be like, okay, I went a few days. I kind of got rid of that. Then I'll redownload the thing and I can conquer it. And then again, and again, just the wasted time. I hated that. But also too, I feel like so many people are losing critical thinking skills now, just leaning on not just social media, but like AI, which I'm not even like a, like a AI, like a complete AI hater. I just like, so many dangers of like, people are picking up AI more than they are the word of God, or even just like, even just using the, the common sense God gives them. Um, which is, but the, the time thing is such an interesting thing. Cause there's only so many times I know it's bad if I delete social media and I like open up my phone in five minutes and then I opened the weather app 20 times. Like there's only like a certain amount of time. And it's like, okay, there's a deeper problem here than just like the social media. Well, it's obviously addicting, you know, like obviously it's addicting. We've all can acknowledge that our phones and, but it's cool. Like that's why the summer camp where you get rid of your phone is like, it's actually does well because it's out of sight. It is out of mind, but if it's there, like you're picking up and you're scrolling. So yeah, that's totally real. And I think again, one of the things why I wrote, who are you following is like, who you're following is who's influencing you. Who's influencing you is obviously the kind of lifestyle that you're going to start living. You're going to start like, for instance, if you hang out with a friend who talks a certain way, you're going to start talking like that friend. That's just what you do. Well, we got to realize in the same way, like what we're listening to is influencing the way we act. So it's very important. Who's in your ear. It's very important. What podcast you listen to is very important. What songs you listen to. And that's not in a legalistic way. It's in a lifestyle way. What does the fruit of your life want? What do you want the fruit of your life to look like? And so if I'm going to scroll and I'm actually going to waste time, how can I change that from wasted time to beneficial time? Cause not all screen time is time. There are people on there that actually are putting up really good things that are really good to see. So like follow the right people, listen to the right voices, turn on the right things. I just think that people, it's almost like we don't want to be legalistic. So we don't want to be like, only listen to this music, only do that. It's like, you know, it's not actually legalism. It's like that will bless your life. Like listen to the right things, look at the right things. Like there are some apps that I don't have on my phone because I think that it's too hard to have self-control in and not a self-control like, oh, it's going to tempt me. It's too hard in the sense that that app is not even created in a way that I can protect what I'm going to see. Like for instance, TikTok, like if it's all the Explorer page and like, I can't control what the algorithm is going to feed me. So I don't really need to scroll that because I don't know what's going to come next. So like maybe I don't need to spend as much time on that. Whereas Instagram, I have a little bit more control. I can, you know, turn off seeing other people's things. I'm really actually going to see who I'm following. I think Snapchat to me, like, I don't think a lot of good comes from Snapchat. I don't think anything good is done in the darkness. I think Snapchat is created for hidden things. I think also like. So like the news things that they put out are just like very bent towards sexual things that make you think certain things and then go into hidden photos. Not a good combo. So like use wisdom, you know, like use wisdom because again, if you're going to be on your screen, like set some boundaries up for yourself to have like, you know, productive scroll time. Yeah. What have you learned over the years from where true confidence comes from then? Because I mean, people find that from social media. I know in my life, I've learned. I've learned the hard way of a thousand people can say something good about you and it just puffs you up with pride and there can be one bad comment and it's louder than the thousand good and it just shatters your heart like a glass house in a hillside. It's like the biggest double-edged sword on the planet. How have you been able to redirect like even in those moments of your life going back to where confidence comes from and where do you think that true confidence comes from? This is such an important question. This is such an important. This is such an important question because if I go back to me at 17 on one hand, you're like, oh, you should be so confident. I had a million followers, you know, and it's like all these comments at the time everyone's like was saying your goals, goals, goals. I'm like, so that's like one person's perspective of me. I look back and I'm like, oh gosh, I was like deeply insecure. I like did not feel like people liked me. I so that goes to show you're not going to get your confidence by hitting a certain number of followers by having enough comments that tell you you're awesome enough likes that's just not good. That's not going to that's not going to do it for you. It has to be deeper than that. And for me, obviously, I found my confidence in the Lord and you can truly see the difference. I went from people asking for their money back because I couldn't speak longer than five minutes because I was so insecure and anxious to now. I mean, give me 45 minutes. I'm going to go over because I can't stop talking about the Lord. So it's like I'm not but I'm no longer I'm no longer trying to gain confidence in myself. My confidence is in Christ. When I talk about God and what he's done and what he's done in me, I could talk about all day long. But if you want me to talk about myself, I don't even want to talk about myself. There's like there's no good in that. Like the confidence is 100 percent in Christ and who he is in me. And so when you receive Christ and like the grace of Christ on your life and all that, you know, you know who you are without him. You know who you are in him. That's where confidence comes from. Like this book's called It's Not Personal and the not slash out. And the idea of it is like we take things so personally like that one comment. It's like crushes you. So it's like but actually like that's not personal. They don't even know you. But we have to take our relationship with Christ personal. Like our relationship with Jesus has to be the most personal thing. Like it has to it has to pierce you in your soul. And when you take that personally, then you don't take the conversation with man personally. Because why would I take something from someone who does not know who I am? When the God of the universe who created me and my mother's name says something different about me. That's established. That's sealed. And so, man, I love talking about this. Because I'm like, if someone's watching this and they're like, how could she say that? How could she sit here as a woman and be like, I'm so confident and actually mean it and believe it. I want to say to them, you can say that, too. You can feel that, too, and actually believe the words that you're saying. And it has nothing to do with you. Has nothing to do with what you're going to achieve in life, what you can look like, what how many followers you're to get, what comments you're going to get people even liking you. It's going to have everything to do with you actually believing that God is real. That God is God and that Jesus did what he said that that it says he did and that he took away all your sins. He rose again so that you could have hope in an eternal life with God who created you. And you're that crazy loved. If you actually believe that, it will absolutely change everything about your life. And my brother in law, we had this conversation the other day and he said, do you think that if you were to say like what Paul said when Paul was like, imitate me as I imitate Christ, that it would come off cocky these days? Like what people would be like? Like, who are they to say something like that? Like, how did Paul get away with saying that? I said, I don't think so, because I think if it was clear, like Paul was very clear that imitate me as I imitate Christ was not him saying I do everything perfect. He was honest about all of those things. But he was saying, like, Christ is the best life. And I'm confident I have to tell people, like, follow me because I'm following Christ. And as I was telling him, like, in the same way, I would never want it to come off cocky. It's the last anything but cocky when I say I'm confident as a woman. Because it has nothing to do with me. It has everything to do with Christ. And the message is so important that you preach that when you feel that, because that is so different than what anybody in the world is preaching or feeling or could even confidently say. Because I just think you only find it in Christ. But the beauty is that's available for everyone. And that's available for everyone today. And so take it from me at 17 being super insecure and feeling that way for years. And now at 29 being like, man, I'm so grateful that I can. You know, sit here and say that. And it's not fluff. So your personal life is what inspired inspired you to write the book. Yeah. Just like struggling with that. Like the confidence, the things like that. It's all about the woman at the well. So the woman at the well, I just saw myself in her in such like a really cool way, because I think like I always heard her preach. And it was about how she was married, you know, four times. And this is her fifth husband. And I really know, like, I can relate to her so much necessarily because our life was very different. But as I read her. Her story with the context of my brokenness, my insecurity for this woman, like she was someone who wanted to go to the well at noon. She didn't want to go when the other women were going. She was going by herself. So like she obviously we can take feels insecure. She doesn't want to be seen by everybody. She feels eyes looking at her for a different reason than maybe I did. But but she feels that she feels that judgment. And she goes to this well. She's exhausted. She doesn't want to have to go to this well. She keeps going back to for water. But she has to. Because she's, you know, in need of it. And yet Jesus says and she doesn't know Jesus is the Messiah yet. But Jesus comes and he's like, hey, you don't have to keep doing this. Like, I have something better. I can offer you living water. And she was curious about it. She's like, OK. And he's like, come here and bring your husband here. And she's like, I don't have a husband, you know. And he goes, you're right. And saying that you've had five, you know, and the one you're with now is not your husband. It's like, holy cow. And when you read that, it's like so much confidence, confrontation. And we want to know what's going on. We want to go like, oh, my gosh, like that is so uncomfy. Jesus, like, why would you say that? Why did you have to do that? Like she wanted living water. Just give her the living water. Why are you going to talk about the husband thing? But I love that he did that because and I love her response to it. It wasn't to shame her. It was literally to tell her, I know you. I know everything about you. And yet I'm still willing to sit here with you, drink from your cup. Like everything he was doing was positioned to tell her, I love you. And then he reveals to her for the first time to anyone that he's the Messiah because she said, when the Messiah comes to, she's longing. She's like, oh, I just wish all this would be better. And then he says, I who am speaking to you, I'm he. And that woman, that same woman that was just insecure, just living in the shame of her past, just living all that, drops her water jug, runs back to the town, the same town she was hiding from, runs back and starts preaching, testifying, saying, y'all going to come meet a man who told me everything I ever did. Now, that testimony right there, that wasn't great. Like, that wasn't some crazy. She didn't say, come meet a man. We just performed a miracle. Come meet a man who just busted open the well and like showed me living water. She's like, come meet a man who told me everything I ever did. That's it. That man knows me. That man loves me. That testimony changed her from the inside out so much so that she had a confidence she didn't have two seconds before. She had shame break off of her life that she was just carrying. And she started preaching this community. And then that community's life was totally changed. And then they said, it's not just because of your testimony that we know he's the Christ because what we've. Now seen for our own eyes. And I'm like, I want my life to be like that. Like, I want to be like, you got to come meet a man who told me everything I ever did it. I used to be the person insecure. I used to be the person running for this. I used to be the person like, I don't want to be famous. I don't want to do this. I feel so much pressure. I feel so much burden. And now I'm like, thank you, God, that you would give me so much grace that you would allow me to stand before people and boast in you, like, and just boast in Christ and actually tell people about the fruit of who you are, which is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness. Like. Everything the world's craving is who you are. It's what's inside of me. It's what's flowing out of me. Am I perfect? Far from it. Do I still struggle at days? Absolutely. Do I have anxiety? Yes. The world is scary. Do I have insecurity some days? Absolutely. But man, I can boast in Christ. Like he satisfies my soul. And in a world of so many people searching for things that you can only find in Christ, what an honor it is to tell people where to find him. I hope that my my lifestyle that my my social media whatever people follow me on it's that it's like thank you like it was your testimony but like now it's my own like thank you for your testimony but now I know him personally now I've met Christ and now I have my own story to tell I have my own transformation to tell and I just want to say to people like 17 I wasn't I was not all automatically living this way at 18 like it took time took years of walking with Christ I'm still not where I want to be. I hope that, you know, 10 years from now when I'm 39, I'm looking back at my 29 year old self's like, oh my gosh, can't believe the little worries that I had, the things that I stressed over and all that. Like we're always going to be, you know, being made into his image and there's so much to change, but man, he's so good. And that, yeah, that's the message I'm preaching. Why do you think people have to act like they're okay when they're really struggling? Why do you think people feel that way? You know, that is such an interesting question because I don't know sometimes, like when I look back at myself and I say that, of course we know, like we know we struggle with, maybe it's pride. Maybe we don't want people to look down on us or maybe it's not pride. Maybe it's just like fear. Maybe it's like deep shame. Maybe it's depression. They're very real things we feel. But why I say I don't know is because every time I convince myself, I can't tell anybody this because they'll think, I'm like, how did I just let the enemy convince me of that again every time I've seen when we confess our sins to one another, we're healed. Like the word literally says, when we confess our sins to one another, we are healed. And I've actually seen that. So why the next time I'm struggling, do I hesitate to share when I've seen one healing from confession, when I've seen two vulnerability, vulnerability, vulnerability, vulnerability and empathy lead to such joy. And, um, so, so I say, I don't know, not because I don't know. Of course, I know. Of course I know the struggle and I still struggle with those things, but I don't know how we convince ourselves of that when the word is so clear and when the word I've actually seen is true. So I just want to say to that person who might be in that, like every time you confess your sins to someone else, uh, first of all, there's no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. So if someone condemned you and you felt shame in the past, maybe confess to another person who can hear it with the right, with the right ears and plead the Jesus over you. And then two, like if it's because of some anxiety that you're feeling or shame, like anything that comes into the light, you know, it, it expels the darkness. Right. And so you're going to find healing in that you're going to find breakthrough in that. And so don't let the enemy convince you that staying quiet is the best. It just leaves you in a trap. Um, once you come out with it, it's amazing what the Lord can do with it. Um, but that's a real struggle. I still feel that way. And I know what's true. I know what you were talking about earlier, like confidence coming from the Lord and things like that, but has becoming a mom and having kids like helped with your confidence. A hundred percent, a hundred percent. And, and I, I say that too, with a lot of, um, empathy, knowing a lot of moms haven't experienced that. And so I want to encourage moms out there. Like I know that motherhood can come with its own baggage, you know, its own struggles. But I think for me, having three girls has certainly helped me. It's definitely been a huge accountability in my life and brought forth those convictions in my life. I was literally telling Christian this morning, I said, I feel like we've been in the phase for five years of like having kids. And now we're in the phase, like we're raising kids. Like, you know, we have a five-year-old and she's watching us. She's asking really good questions. She's a three-year-old too. But when you're five, you can articulate it a little bit more. Our one-year-old also, she can't articulate it at all yet, but like we're raising kids. And I was telling him like, what kind of example do I want to be for our kids weighs on me and little decisions and big decisions. And, um, one of the things that we always say is we're, we've said this since the day we got married, but like this house will set the tone. This house will set the tone for our ministry, for our life, for our public life. Like whatever happens in this house sets the tone for whatever happens out there. And whatever happens out there is overflow from this home. So I say there's deep conviction in like my heart for what example I want to set with for my girls. And a lot of that is internal stuff, not just external stuff. Like I want to be confident because I want to show them that you can be a woman one day, a girl, and actually be confident and not compare yourself from the left and the right and not compare yourself to your sisters, but actually champion your sisters and really believe it when you say it. I want to show them that you don't have to live in jealousy. You don't have to live in comparison. You don't have to live in anxiety. Like you can live fully in Christ. Um, but part of showing them that is confessing when I do feel that way, like telling them, I feel scared sometimes, you know, Oh, mommy feels like this or whatever. And like showing them how I'm overcoming that with Christ. And so all that to say, I think it's, it's helped me gain confidence because it keeps me on my convictions. It keeps me accountable. And I'm really, really grateful for that. I think I used to would have just, you know, if, if you only think that your life affects you, you're less willing to change, but when you know, your life affects other people, then there's a little bit more of an oomph to that. Now, motherhood is not the only thing that should make us do that. Our life does affect other people. Period. Everybody listening to this podcast, your life has an effect on other people. And an awareness of that helps you to make the changes you need to make to be a blessing to others. I know earlier this year, you guys had a terrifying season and experience with one of your daughters, Kit. Can you kind of walk me through what was happening? Yeah, it was, um, deeply terrifying. So, um, my daughter Kit was born really healthy and she was, you know, really thriving, like doing all the things that she should be doing as, as a little one. But the only thing is she had this like funny breathing noise. And, um, we had asked our pediatrician about it and he had told us that it was called, um, laryngomalacia is what she probably has, but we can't necessarily prove it unless we did a scope. And he said, it's really not that big of a deal. Typically, most kids grow out of it. And he said, one kid he's ever had in his life. And he was like, okay, nothing really to worry about. She'll grow out of it by the time she's one. Well, she was close to eight months old at the time, just now kind of starting to do solids. And we were at setter in her little high chair, gave her some puffs. And within just a couple of minutes of that, she completely, um, started to turn blue. And so she was choky, but we didn't know really why, how, what was happening. And so it was literally the most terrifying moment of our life. Um, CPR, whole nine yards ambulance was called everything. And truly the Lord and his, you know, goodness and kindness in that moment was gave her breath. And we were just like completely overwhelmed, so grateful, but didn't know what happened. So I remember at the hospital that night, like asking them what that was, you know, I was like, I just don't think she just choked. And they were like, no, like mama, she ate food. She choked, you know, it's fine. Like, don't overthink it. And I was like, I just feel like there was something, like more than that. Don't overthink it. Don't overthink it. Well, okay. So trying to overthink it, I go back home the next day, like just really traumatized, but like trying to just like lean into the Lord. Um, God was really cool in that moment, literally the whole way to the hospital, the ambulance, like there was a rainbow over us, like so many things that I felt like the Lord was showing me he was there, but still just like a horrible thing to walk through. Two weeks later, she choked again, did the same thing, same scene. And so, um, now I knew like something's wrong. So we ended up taking her down south, finding out she, her laryngo was like very serious, literally Malaysia was very serious. So had surgery and, um, then felt like, okay, we're, we made it through that. That was really hard, really terrifying, but like we made it through after that, she started having these breath holding episodes where she will like pass out, uh, when she gets triggered by something, probably because of the choking, uh, something I did too as a kid. And so, so I like to say like, you know, it wasn't just like one and done, thing is like been such a journey of overcoming this really terrifying thing. Cause every time she passes out and she still continues to, we're praying that that will stop. Every time she passes out, it mimics the choking thing. So it's like reliving trauma. And I will say I have never had to have this much dependency on the Lord as I have in this season of my life. Um, same time that was happening were some really crazy moments in our life where, I was asked to speak at these like very crazy, big opportunities. And it was like in the middle of such a hard season. So there was dependency on like, Lord, I don't know how I'm going to like do this. I don't know. I don't even know if I should be doing this. I just really want to just really be here with her. And yet the Lord continued to carry us at every single stage, whether that was in our home or on a stage, on a platform. And. People keep telling me this summer, like you're like preaching different. Like your, your voice sounds different whenever you preach. And I hear that. And I agree with that. And I think it's because I am hanging on to the hope that I have claimed wholeheartedly. Like it's just a different conviction. It's just a different belief. And if I didn't 100% believe in what I'm saying and that it would encourage and change the lives of others, I just wouldn't do it. I would just stay home. Because I love being a mom. It's my favorite thing in the entire world. And I would, I would love that. I would be great with that. And I. I've asked the Lord so many times, should I just do that, you know? But I really do believe in the power of the gospel being shared. And I'm really, really grateful for the opportunities I have. And again, our house sets the tone of that. And so I get to do that with my girls and get to do it with other people. And there's so many people whose story didn't turn out the way ours did. You know, there's so many people whose baby didn't start breathing again. And I just don't know what you'd do with that if you didn't have the hope of heaven. And so I'm very grateful to share that with other people because it's so needed. You need to hear that. You need to hear that this world is not the end. You need to hear that whatever happens to you in your life, whatever is happening to you in your life is not the end. This world's not our home. We're just passing through. That God is good even when life is hard, that he's present and near even when you don't understand circumstances and that he has something better in time to come. And so I think that just woke me up in a new way. You know, you mentioned, you know, like that was a hard season for you. I know like a lot of people like Gen Z high schoolers, younger people that are trying to follow Jesus. One of the harder seasons in their life is trying to figure out what God's will is for their life. And I mean, you were literally talking about, I mean, grew up on TV. We're doing speaking events before really surrendering to Jesus. And then after surrendering to Jesus, you go, I think this is what I think I'm supposed to do. Whereas like a lot of people don't really have that light switch moment. I think one of the most common questions I get asked is, well, what's God's will for my life? Like, how do I know what's, God's will is for my life. And I'm just curious how you knew at 17 going like, oh, no, I'm going to do this thing when that was something that you really hated. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I want to say to those who are struggling with that, because that's actually the number one question I get asked to on my podcast. Anytime we open it up for questions, it's like, I don't know God's will for my life. I want to encourage you by saying, you don't and you won't in the grand scheme of, if you think it has to do with what your job is going to be. Because that is, I don't think that is God's will for your life. I think God's will for our life is what Jesus said when he summed up the whole lot of this. Love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul and mind and strength. Love your neighbor as yourself. I think that is God's will for everybody's life. I think that is God's will for our life when we become Christians. I think then you go on to other verses, whatever you do, do unto the Lord as if you're doing to the Lord, not for man. So like with that, in mind, okay, whatever I do, I'm going to do for the glory of God, not for man. And I'm going to love God in it and I'm going to love people in it. And so that takes the stress off of going like, hey, it's not like this job or that job. It's not like this college or that college. It's not, you're not going to mess it up. God's so much bigger than that. In Proverbs it says, man makes his plans, but the Lord establishes his steps. In other words, like you can make your plans, but the Lord has to establish your steps. And if the will of God, if you think the will of God can be dumbed down to something that can change in your life, like as far as like, okay, when the pandemic happened, well, if somebody thought the will of God for their life was like to have this certain job, and then in 2020, like that job was no longer available, but all of a sudden, do you think that you messed up the will of God for your life when you had absolutely nothing to do to control that? No, God's so much bigger than that. Like he knew the pandemic was going to happen and he has greater plans. And so therefore it has to be, your purpose has to be bigger than something that can just be taken away. It has to be something, that can remain in every season. And so I didn't know at 17 that I would start a podcast and I would be preaching on stages. I mean, I saw that vision. I thought that would be a great one. I didn't know how that was going to play out. Never would have thought I would preach at like passion conference. Like that would have, if you would have told me, actually someone did say one time at a young age, do you think I'd ever speak at passion? I was like, maybe like when I'm 30, like if I keep going in that direction, like never, like you don't know those things. Again, like just keep loving God, loving people and doing whatever in your heart you feel passionate about. There's a message by Louis Giglio and it's called Passion, Purpose and Designer Genes. One of the most helpful sermons that I heard at that time to go, hey, even if it's like, you're so passionate about designer genes and like do that for the glory of God. And so my life looks like this because those are the things that I love and who I am. Now you mentioned I hated it. I didn't hate it because again, I didn't hate it because it wasn't in my personality. I hated it because I wasn't living it. I hated it because it wasn't true. I think I was hating it because I felt like a hypocrite in it. But like I said, when you go back to my younger self and you see my home videos and I'm going, this is the Sadie Robertson show and now I'll have a podcast. Like there are elements to my personality that God was going to use it and it's just the enemy distorted it for a time. So I encourage you, look at yourself. What do you love to do? What do you feel passionate about doing? Do it for the glory of God and in it, love God and love people. And in that, you're doing the will of God for your life. But don't put, don't put so much pressure on yourself. Man, life changes in ways you couldn't expect and it's not your fault. Most of the time when life changes. Yeah, I think you just hit on that because the sidebar question is, well, what if I make the wrong decision? Like, well, what if I turn left and I was supposed to go right? Or, you know, what if the person says, you know, I was called to, you know, I don't know, pastor a church, but out of comfortability, I went and took a job that I had to commit to for two years and things like that. I remember feeling that way and Pastor Louie, he was preaching a sermon at a passion conference. And he's got so many good nuggets and just like things that are like, oh man, I've taken them with me. He said, he just like, he preached this amazing sermon at the passion conference and then he sidebarred on this thing for like two minutes. And that's what I took. That's what I took. He just randomly was like, yeah, you know, some college student asked me like, how do I make a decision for the glory of God? And if it's, should I go to Georgia Tech or Stanford or something for grad school? And he was like, I don't care where you go. And I was like, what the heck? And then he said, as long as you make the decision that sets you up best spiritually. Yeah, that's good. And I thought that was so cool because I was like, dang, like, does God really care all the time? Like where I go, what I do? And I mean, I think that, you know, he does care in that sense of like, am I honoring him spiritually and setting myself up better spiritually? And I just, I really held onto that in that wrong decision because I get that paranoia of making that wrong decision. I think that paralyzes a lot of people. And they're so scared of making a wrong decision. They don't make any decision. And that's the last thing God wants you to do. I don't think you're, I think God is so good at redirecting, you know, and he's, he's so much bigger than you are. He's so much stronger than you. You can't even imagine the ways that he moves, right? And so I don't, I think if your heart posture is to honor the Lord and to follow him, you can't mess it up. Like you're not going to mess it up. Go read the Old Testament. Like the life of Moses really encourages us. It encourages me because like God set Moses up. Like God, God set Moses up in so many cool ways. Like in a basket, you know, Pharaoh's daughter picks him up, like so crazy. Then he's raised in Pharaoh's house. And then what does he do? Like he messes it up. He murders someone. Like he actually, he messed it up. Like he could have messed it up. If anybody messes up, this guy messed it up. He like sit, he murdered someone. And so now he's running away. So now like the person God was going to use to speak to Pharaoh, who was once in Pharaoh's house, that would have been probably more ideal if he was still in Pharaoh's house, is now like on some mountain somewhere. And yet God still doesn't let him mess it up. God shows up where he's at with a burning bush and calls him by name and redirects him. Hey, I had a plan for you. I hear the cry of your people and you're the guy to do it. I'm going to send you back to Pharaoh. And what does Moses say? No. Moses is like, I have a speech impediment. And then God's like, I made your mouth. I understand. Like I know all these things. Like you're, you didn't mess it up. You're not too dumb for the job. You're not too like, just, just trust me. And then Moses is like, well, who am I that I could do this? And God doesn't spend time telling Moses all the reasons why it should be Moses and who he is. God simply redirects to himself and says, I am who I am. And you're going to go back and you're going to tell them that the great I am sent you. And so what God did was lift, lift Moses' eyes off of him and onto God. And when Moses' eyes got off of his insecurity, off of the sins he had committed, committed in the past, off of his shame, he was like, I can do that, right? I can go back and do it for your glory. And so all I have to say, like, I take such comfort in stories like that because like, I'm that person. I'm like, God's calling me and I'm like, I messed it up and I did this. And then like all of a sudden God's like, redirect. Like, let me remind you, I am who I am. Go tell people about me, not about you. Let me, let me use you for my glory. Let me, this is so not about you, Moses. This is actually about an entire generation coming out of slavery, like so much bigger than that. And so again, like lift your eyes a little higher, like lift your eyes, but you know, I love it. Lift your eyes upon the hills. I was thinking about that. We watched the David movie a lot in our house. I'm like hearing it sung, but it's like, just like get your head up. You know, it's, it's so much bigger than just this college or that college. And at the end of the day, like it's for the glory of God. It's for a bigger purpose. And you're just, if your heart is towards him, you're not going to mess it up. And even if your heart is not, I mean, Moses, like, you know, I don't know what Moses was doing out there. Maybe he was praying, maybe he wasn't. God is sovereign. He's so good, you know? And that's why I just want people to understand, like, he's not up there, like waiting for you to make the wrong decision. He's leading you. He's guiding you. Read the word. Your word is a lamp unto my feet, a light into my path. Let it guide you in your next step, in your next direction. I got to ask you about relationships. I think, I think it's fun specifically about Christian. I just want to blast him on here for like 10 minutes. So he's in the room. Yeah. Yeah. yeah no we're just gonna gossip about you 15 minutes with you in the room um i'm curious about when you started because you mentioned like earlier in the conversation about how like you were just in relationships where both parties you and those people at the time weren't like not maybe the best example not healthy when you started dating christian what was it about him that made you think he was somebody you could marry yeah that's a great question so when i met christian i had actually just broken up with the guy i was dating the day i met him i didn't know i was gonna meet christian that day but i broke up with this guy and um or the day before i met him sorry and i told my friends like finally it was just like hey guys like i'm i'm on a loop here like i'm going into all these relationships the same way it is not working and everybody obviously saw that and could have said that to me but i needed to like say it out loud this is like confessing to my best friends we're at the on a beach drive and i was like i gotta i gotta pump the brakes like i gotta stop dating because until i figure out how to date well like i'm i'm done and so they literally video me say i'm done dating i gotta like get my heart right all this stuff and so they had this video well the very next day we're walking on the beach and i see christian and i'm like oh my gosh that's the cutest guy i've ever seen in my life so i like turned to my friends and i go with my shirt on my shirt was on sure it was i just saw that face i was like oh shoot now the funny thing is my sister knew christian so i've no i knew who christian was from the context of my sister but i didn't like i don't know i just wasn't paying attention i guess because when i saw him on the beach i was like oh gosh so i looked at my best friend i said delete that video and literally as we're walking up and my friends like don't even talk to him no you're done dating like don't and i was like and i literally think to myself like why would i why did i say that like gosh this guy's so cute i'm about to miss this opportunity he could be my husband for all we know and so i was like oh my gosh i'm so sorry i'm so sorry i'm so sorry i'm so anyways i avoided christian all night because i really was trying to stick to what i said and i knew like i did need a change like that that was true what i said was honest well christian i started talking that night and um he mentioned that i didn't follow him on instagram and i followed his cousin and his brother and all this stuff and i did because my sister was friends with them dang you stalker boy you're looking at the following list dude come on bro he's like imagine like hey i was checking your following list you don't even follow that's crazy especially back in instagram's like fairly like fairly new and like you know yeah i'm like calling christian old right now like you get what i mean that's a crazy bars like hey you don't even follow me yeah it actually was crazy and he like to this day we laugh that he did that because that was one so out of character for him now that i know him like so well i'm like that is actually crazy you did that and too like that was crazy and but it worked so then i kind of felt bad so i was like okay so i followed him and when i hit follow that night i waited till obviously i got home wasn't gonna like follow him right in front of his face so i waited and then i got a dm and i was like oh my gosh like he was probably just saying nice to meet you whatever so i click on it and the dm was from a year and a half ago i'd never seen him because i only get dms from like people that follow and so i was like oh my gosh and he saw me speak of passion and he was like hey um i just saw you speak of passion and i think it's like really cool what god's doing in your life i think you're doing amazing things like cheering you on and then he added and i think you're the most beautiful girl in the world and i was like oh my gosh so all of this is not why i knew christian was the man i was going to marry but it is what helped us start dating dude have you ever seen that meme of steph curry like shooting the basketball from the moon you know what i mean that is crazy a year and a half later and then it just it just appeared in the dms the timing was right did that freak you out a little bit well i remember thinking oh gosh because i just told her i wasn't gonna date anybody and i if i engage what am i gonna say like he he told me i was so beautiful like it was setting me up to be like you know want to like him or date him or like say something oh you did like that he said i liked it because i was i already thought he was really cute and then he said this and i was like oh man but then i was thinking about my friends and i was like they're gonna be so mad at me and i was thinking about my sister because she's friends with christian and his family and you know me was a couple years because when my sister met christian christian was in his era of living his wildlife so my sister hadn't seen him like as a changed person and so it wasn't like people were like oh y'all should date it was like like my sister was like oh what i knew of christian would not be someone that you probably should date and i just told everybody i don't need to be dating so i i just was all this was going through my mind so i gave it three days of considering if i should respond or not and i talked to my sister my mom about it i was like okay look i really don't need to date i don't even think me and christian are that similar like from what i'd heard and i was like but i might as well just get to know him because this is making me laugh now because i'm sure everyone was like yeah right like you totally like him but i was like i just want to get to know him because like billy you know him like y'all are all friends like i want to be y'all's friend too so we started dming within a week and we weren't flirting we were literally just like talking about random things like he was like have you heard this sermon have you read this and then um then he asked me on a date like a week later and then i told him hey i actually think you're awesome but i kind of am in this time where i just like need a little space like i don't need to date anyone and so i gave him a date that i would go on a date with him and it was two months later like two months past the time he asked he's like that's two months away i was like yeah i if we you know get to know each other in these two months and then we want to go on a date then that would be awesome let's just get to know each other that was so important that that was pivotal for me because i hadn't like gotten to know someone before i just jumped into dating them which i think is different than how things are now that people say in that you know what do they call it is it like now at kroger your points add up to more ways to save every trip use them your way to take dollars off groceries at checkout or save at the pump you can even save up to 35 dollars on your next fill up same points more choices and with low prices on fresh quality food plus digital and personalized offers tailored to how you shop your dollar goes further redeem your points online or in the app kroger fresh for everyone restrictions apply c-site or store for details yeah they're like talking stage yeah and so yeah for me i guess like i would just jump into dating people really fast and like we'd go just like i would just say i love you i didn't even mean it i didn't even know what that was yeah me and christian like for two months really got to know each other and i was like i don't know what that was and i was like i don't know what that was and we started reading like the same book and we would talk about that because like we were trying not to flirt so we would like talk about god we talk about books we were reading through proverbs at the time funny enough like sweet enough like that's actually where honey's name came from was when we were dating we read through proverbs and proverbs 16 talked about how gracious words are like honey sweetens the soul and healing to the bones and we had this vulnerable conversation i was like i've had so many words really hurt me and made me insecure in my life and i said your words are like honey to me they're very like healing to me from like people i dated in the past like words that were spoken over me that really hurt me and so i told him i was like your words are like honey to me and i put the little honey pot emoji by his you know that was like his emoji by his name on my phone and then our first daughter we named honey so like just like things there that were just foundational to our relationship and then when we started dating this is when i knew i was going to marry him is whenever i went to break up with him plot twist because i started totally getting in my head and i was so scared i was going to do what i had done in the past and dating and i was like i was going to be in this really and it had nothing to do with him he was great everything he did in pursuing me was amazing i loved our first date we had gone on at this point i thought he was wonderful i just i think i was scared of myself i was just like i don't want to i don't want to do it wrong again and i don't want to i don't want it to distract me from now i'm finally living the life god has called me to live i was like on this tour i was preaching i felt very i just felt set free of so much in the past and i just did not want to do it again and i just felt like i was distracted and i didn't want to be a distraction to him like he was going into his junior year of college so anyways i started talking myself out of a good thing so i call him and i was gonna let him know that i thought he was awesome but i'm gonna have to end this relationship well before i even got to the point i was rambling so much about all the reasons that i was about to end this relationship because i'm going on tour and he's in college blah blah blah and he just literally told me to stop talking he's like stop talking and then he said first of all stop apologizing for what god's doing in your life because i kept saying i'm so sorry i'm so busy i'm going to be on tour i'm going to be doing this and one that was huge for me because i had been i think i had been saying sorry a lot to like even my friends like sorry that i'm missing this i'm sorry that i'm doing this i'm sorry and it was all things god was doing in my life but i think i was so scared of like what happened in high school that like people wouldn't like me because my life was changing that i kind of like dumbed down what god was doing in my life and like i wouldn't tell people about exciting opportunities or like i just was so afraid of that happening again and when he said that i was like i needed to hear that like i need to stop apologizing for what god's doing i need to be proud of this and like own it and then he said sadie if it's a win for you and if it's a win for the kingdom it's a win for me so you don't have to be sorry that you're gonna not be able to come visit me at auburn you don't have to be sorry that you're gonna you know be your life is different than what most girls i would date because i had had people in the past say like it's like you know Like no one else would date you because your life is so, complicated because of all the things that come with your life and like I believe that so I didn't want to do that to him and he's like that's that's not true like that's toxic thinking that's not the thinking God have for you so it was the first time in a relationship that I really saw like a man leading me spiritually and speaking truth over my life and making me feel more confident in myself and not even in myself but more confident in what God have for me and it's so cool because the irony of it is the moment I was going to break out with him is actually the moment I realized I was going to marry him and even the words he said to me like all those words ended up in our vows like I remember saying to him like if it's a win for you if it's a win for the kingdom it's a win for me and like that was something he said two months into knowing him you know so he's he's an amazing man big shout out to him for uh not hiding behind the dms and actually talking to you face to face because that's the that's the new thing is you know you talk all this smack you know online on text on snapchat then like you can't even look at them in the eye you know when you see them so a mad respect to Christian and that's so crazy too that you guys did so Maddie and I met at a bible study and then we did it it was November 1st we met and we didn't start dating like dating until like late January and we always hung out in group settings we went on a friend's road trip together like Arizona and back to go to Waffle House and church and like come back and all these things and like getting to like actually getting to know her because I did the same thing like I I would never get to know people um I would just kind of like you know jump into this like weird little like flirtatious like I'm trying to fill a void in my heart kind of thing um and so Maddie was Maddie was so different and we read uh we read we read a book together when we first started and we read single dating engaged we did too did you really literally shout out to Ben Stewart single dating engaged married no joke like that's the best thing I've ever read in my life I've ever read in my life I've ever read that okay so the whole this is really funny because this was such a sly move of his so to get out of the dms he goes hey I want to send you this link to this sermon but it's not letting me send it through the dm so could I have your number you were you lying he might have been fabricating the truth so when he texted me my first text from Christian Huff is single dating engaged married sermon by Ben Stewart and I'm like that's kind of old and then dishing out free game like I know and then we eventually read that book did we we didn't read that when we were dating though but we read that book single dating engaged married we listened to the sermon series when we were dating and then or when we were kind of talking we listened to the sermon series and yeah we read through Proverbs so I remember like us actually reading through that which is really good because if you make it to Proverbs 31 reading through someone that's that's a good sign you know I had tried the Proverbs challenge with other people and I never made 31 now I'm 31 hey that doesn't always stay on but it did work for us that's so sick I like uh yeah I think uh the the Proverbs 31 woman is like they think of uh charms deceitful beauty is fleeting but there's like a butt ton of verses like way before that and uh there's like multiple books men should read women get a chapter because you know and then men get like multiple books that they they should read well I really appreciate you coming on this has been awesome yeah so fun yeah I would love uh so typically we pray at the end of that every episode I would love for you to pray for everyone watching I would love to thanks Bryce I appreciate it so much God thank you thank you so much Lord you are so good you are so kind you are um just like we've said in this podcast and declared like you're you're so much greater than we could ever imagine God the angels who surround you all they can say is holy holy holy and God we just join them in their praise of you and say you're so holy thank you for how you love us God thank you that you sent your one and only son to die for us and thank you that he conquered death in their grave uh God thank you that anything we're afraid of you've conquered and so Lord to the people out there who feel fear right now God I pray that in Jesus name as I trust in you believe in you take heart in you God that anxieties would lift from their life that depression would lift God that the joy of who you are would be a strength in their life in the days to come God I pray that you would lift God that you would bless your people God that you would encounter them Lord we do pray in dreams and visions through angels in whatever way you want to grab the attention of your sons and daughters God I thank you for Bryce and Maddie and I just thank you so much for this couple you've raised up in this generation to unapologetically preach the gospel I thank you for their boldness I thank you for their compassion for their love for people I thank you for them continuing to put out things in the world that are going to bless others they try to do it for you and I thank you truly bring more to social media and they take and Lord I just pray that you would continue to bless their family bless their lives bless their ministry anything they put their hands to God but you continue to strengthen their hands purify their hearts God we just love you we honor you we bless every listener God I pray that this podcast would be at just the perfect time in their life when they hear it God God I pray it would fall on good soil and they look back at this as a marker of their life of when they begin to hear your voice so God we love you and it's in your name now at Kroger your points add up to more ways to save every trip use them your way to take dollars off groceries at checkout or save at the pump you can even save up to $35 on your next fill up same points more choices and with low prices on fresh quality food plus digital and personalized offers tailored to how you shop your dollar goes further redeem your points online or in the app Kroger fresh for everyone restrictions apply see cider store for details man amen