S1 Ep15: Pregnancy in Mexico City, what’s involved?

[Music] Hello and welcome to another Mexico edition of our podcast. - "Lexico City Edition" - Where's Paul Smith? - Oh, Paul. - On this every single time. - I'm not the consistency one, right? So it's our Mexico City edition of my surrogacy journey, the podcast, but I'll let you carry on with your intro. - I am just gonna let that go. I'm gonna let you have that one. But welcome everybody. If you're viewing and watching us on YouTube, you'll see this gorgeous backdrop here in Pellanco in Mexico City, where our offices are based. This is episode number 15. - Well, I'll introduce myself now. So I'm Wes. I'm the other host of this podcast and I am the other co-founder and husband to Michael. When we created my surrogacy journey, one of the kind of guiding principles of the whole thing of what we do is about educating. And the topic today, I'm not gonna spoil it, but I'm really excited about this topic and our guest as well, she is an amazing clinician and I think the person this is today is gonna get a really good understanding. But it is all about educating people because-- - It is, it is. - Particularly if you are doing a journey in Mexico City and you're not particularly used to the process-- - Well, the health care system. - Well, the health care system, even now, they're given it away, but the podcast and all of the episodes are really designed to give you a really good understanding of the whole Mexico City journey. So without further ado, let us introduce our guest. - Hello. - Hello. - Tell us who you are and what you do and what you're here to talk about. - So first, thanks for having me. I'm very excited about this conversation. My name is Dr. Florent and Seco Varroias. I'm a board certified obstetrician and oncologist specialist. I was born and raised in Mexico City. I went through medical school here and did my residence program here in Mexico. And now I'm very excited to take care of your surrogates in new IPs. - Yes. - And we are very excited that you're-- - Ah, very excited. - I am to look after this gorgeous part of the journey. - So this episode today really is gonna focus on pregnancy in Mexico City, is what the process is once is a confirmed pregnancy, all the way up until the birth and what type of care surrogates and intending parents can expect from that process. - Yep. - Now I know some of you listening or watching may be unfamiliar with what that whole process is and going through this process in a different country without your support network, if you might be quite intimidating or worryful or anxiety-ridden. I'm hoping that Dr. Florent and I'm absolutely sure Dr. Florent is going to give that. - Oh, we're going to. - To give that. Now let's just kind of pedal back a little bit because we worked really hard when we started this process about finding a doctor and hospital who was going to consider not only surrogates and give the surrogates all of the spot they need but intending parents. And that was really important to us. - And some of that came from our only experience as parents through surrogacy, ensuring that everyone felt included. - It did and I think, you know, we're going to talk about a bit more detail but I think we've got a really robust and considered support network through you and your team, Dr. Florent. And I'm really excited to talk about it but it is about considering everything. And I know that you have a friend who has done surrogacy so you are very familiar with the components of it and how everyone feels. And I think what I really appreciate from you working with is that we kind of approach this together and look at what does everyone need and what's going to be the best for everyone. And I think we've really, are we're about to develop a really good program that is going to really consider everyone. - Yeah. - So I always tell my patients that this is the most important project in your life. And I'm pleased to go along with them and to make this process as easy and as joyful as we can. With all the stress that comes with the pregnancy, I've been pregnant myself and always find that having a good professional that comes along with you, that walks with you, takes some of this stress out. That's what we try to do with surrogates and eyepiece. - So let's talk about that first interaction then, okay? Surrogates and intending parents would typically start to work with you at what point? - So at around 12 weeks after the first 12 weeks scan, the fertility clinic will send the patient or the surrogate to me. And then me and my team, whose all obstetrics certified gynecologists will take care of them through the whole pregnancy. So how the pre-nail control works. First, the objective is to find if there's something abnormal in the lab work in the ultrasound that we can correct since the beginning of the pregnancy, just to avoid this to be a problem during the pregnancy. That's why we see surrogates once a month. Once they come to the office, we do like a complete physical exam with her blood pressure, her weight, her vital signs. We do an ultrasound so we can check the baby's growth and then we answer some questions. The way we do it is in Spanish for the surrogate, but also we like to have a FaceTime call with the IPC, they like that. So I can explain also in English. Hopefully you'll hear us. So a little bit French. OK, that could be useful. That would be very hard. Very good. So Spanish for the surrogate, English for the IPs. Amazing. We can have some videos of the ultrasound so they can listen to the baby's heart. And then we all answer questions because I'm sure the surrogate will have questions about her body and the pregnancy, but also the IPs about their baby. Just how amazing was it? You know what I mean? No, no, it is. But again, you recognize Dr. that that is what's needed and that is what is in the best interest of everyone, right? So I can't imagine being pregnant without knowing what's happening with your body or with the baby. And I can't imagine being an IP waiting for a baby and then not knowing if everything is OK. Yeah. When I first met you, one of the real appeals of why I was drawn to you as a professional was your passion to provide inclusivity on someone's route to parenthood. You were so and are so passionate about ensuring, first and foremost, the baby and the surrogate are well and not being exploited. And second of all, making sure that everyone enjoys this journey. And that's exactly one of your principles just for their you and your team work. But these people on this journey are all treated with so much respect and dignity along this particular pregnancy. So as you was mentioned, I'd had one of my best friends went through surrogacy and didn't have like a very good experience. So I lived that very close to me. And it was very painful to see how his experience was. Taking care of the experience of everyone who's involved just makes the whole pregnancy easier and happier. Totally. Yes. It's easy to do, right? It's like doing the right thing. And why would you want to make this most important chapter of your life really difficult? So I think it takes from me the same effort to be kind, that to be harsh and rude. So then I prefer to be kind. Yes. I mean, do you get presents when you're going to people? Yeah. And I also think that, you know, I know that throughout this process, you're always going to respect the surrogate's privacy. She's going to need time and a run. But what I like about this is that both parties get what they need from this, that everyone's getting this part they need. They all get the information that they need. But they all also get the ability to share it as well. Sure. We try to be as clear as we can with the information. I can't explain with medical terms to the surrogate or to the IPs what's going with the pregnancy. So we try to be very clear with the information to answer every question they have. So there's no doubt. And in case I always tell them, if when you cross the door, you have more questions than you can contact me. Because sometimes you'll speak to your family or to your neighbors and then they just ask some questions. What about this? How about that? Yeah. Tell us about your team because you have a phenomenal team. So let's hear a bit about them. And what do they all do? My team with obstetrics team, we're all women. We try to look as well. We're all women. Yes. It's a great team. We're all born certified. We have experience taking care and taking the experience through pregnancy, the very best experience for the pregnant patient and the APs. Then we partner with some specialists, obstetrics and gynecology subspecialists. That's a fetal maternal specialist who's taking care and ruling out chromosomeic and genetic abnormalities. She does three scans during the pregnancy. Then the neonatologist who's taking care of the baby when the baby's born. And like his very breastfeeding oriented and he loves to include the surrogate, include the IPs, we are all in the same path of giving everyone who's involved a great experience. Amazing, by the way. And one of the questions we get let's down the topic of breastfeeding because there are in some of the intended mothers that may want to do induced lactation. What's your views and how would that be considered? So I love breastfeeding. I breastfed my baby. It was very hard. So that's why I think everyone who wants to breastfeed needs lactation consultant. The intended mothers who want to breastfeed need to prepare a few months before the baby's born. So we can do that. Yes. Of course. Just like that. Just like that. Just that easy. I know. But that's why this is so special because it's like, yeah, of course we can. Well, she can, she can pig whatever she wants. But if you, if you want to do it and no one to say no about that. Of course. Of course. So the list might be thinking about, what is the quality of the hospital? What is the quality of the care? No, and I think people have this. misconception that this is Mexico City, that it's not going to be an adequate healthcare facility. And I think when you put that into perspective about, you know, we have a great health and national health service in the UK, but it has its challenges. And you know, sometimes you don't always get the level of care that you should tell us a little bit about what people should expect from the healthcare systems in Mexico. They're all private, right? Yeah, so I'm lucky to see that I run a private practice. Honestly, it's very different to the institutional medicine that's going on in Mexico City. This is completely different in level of care in the building and the hospital and the services that the hospital gives us. El Spitalankele Spitalankele is one of the best hospitals in Mexico City, if not the best one. It has some new rooms for labor and delivery. It has a nursery that I know you're not familiar with. But this is where babies can spend the night. There is a new and atologist on call the whole night. So there's always like a professional taking care of them. And I've seen it. We've seen it. Yes. So the hospital is impressive installation. It's phenomenal. It is. I mean, like Mike and I have both been separately to the hospital. We've had the pleasure of being shown around. We've seen all the facilities. They are world class facilities. And look, our intended parents and our surrogates deserve the best level of care. And that's what's really important about this is that we really care about the service, the care and the professionals that partner with us. We want to make sure that everyone gets access to the best level of care. That it is, isn't it? You know, it's one of the best medical instruments you've ever been in. It's stunning. So when you first go in, it's beautiful. But honestly, the services and the quality of services they give. Of course, in every pregnancy, we try to take care of the surrogate, take care of the baby to reduce the risks as much as we can. But in case something comes up, that's the hospital where you want to be. I want to be yes. And Dr. Explained was why that hospital is important because they're, you know, for pregnancy and for birth. There are some really key components that I can really imagine if I'm an amazing part of you. Just talk to us about those. So most pregnancies go healthy and well, until birth. But in case we have some complications, the most common could be bleeding. And that's why we need a blood bank. And the, so if the surrogate needs a transfusion, we have a blood bank in hospital and kill us. In case the baby needs some extra care, then we have the intensive care unit for neonatal for babies neonatal intensive care unit. Yeah. And in case the surrogate needs intensive care unit, we also have the adults intensive care unit. And I do remember when we were looking at all of the hospitals that we were potentially could work with. That was the key consideration, wasn't it? Yeah. Does it have all of the vital components that are going to make sure that we're safe guys? And it was supposing how many did it, wasn't it? There were a few that didn't have blood bank. Sure. For example, and it had to be all the requirements, didn't it? It did. And that was important to us. And I remember talking to Dr. Raleigh Elyon. And it was really clear that the path for that you provide the team that you have in the hospital you work in kind of had everything that we needed to. And then we had the added benefit that you were a really compassionate doctor. But also you've got experience of surrogacy and you have a friend so you have a connection with it and you appreciate it. And that really ticks all of the boxes for us. And I think in tending parents, answer rougets can be assured that we're providing the best level of care for everyone. But also the inclusive nature of the care. That's what really strikes me. And I think is one thing that a lot of intending parents potentially may worry about. Let's talk about the birth itself. Let's step back a little bit. Let's talk about the preparation up to birth because we as an organisation typically tell intending parents that they should come to Mexico City two weeks before to prepare for birth. Now we all know that you're going to have that relationship with the intending parents all the way through from 12 weeks. And correct me if I wrong. If we anticipate that the birth may be premature or it might make them early, we would then start working with the intending parents to say, well, maybe we might want to consider being out earlier than two weeks before. Sure. So unfortunately, babies do what they want. Don't they, Joseph? Maybe you've seen. When we can predict that we will have a preterm baby, then we can arrange some dates on when would you predict that? What point? So at the half of the pregnancy, with screen for the length of the cervix, that gives us some risk if the surrogate can have contractions earlier, but also if the water breaks or if it's a baby that's not growing accordingly to what we plan to or we're already expecting, then there are some differences in the prenatal control that getting to the end of the pregnancy can like bring a yellow flag, not a red flag, but something to look after. So we sometimes hear that surrogates are encouraged to get bedrassed. And then I know we've talked about this extensively before. What show of you and that doctor? And I know that we've seen some of the contracts where there's elements in the contracts that kind of prepare for and allow for bedrassed. And I personally believe that that's not always in the best interest of the intending parents, but obviously we're always considering the surrogate and making sure that she has what she needs. What show of you on bedrassed? Well when should it be needed? What are the cases? Because I know that some organizations they they recommend that the surrogate is going to bedrassed really early and it's just something that seems to be quite common with some organizations. That's the professional. So of course, every case has to be individualized, but it's not that common. We even know with evidence, with scientific evidence that bedrassed can do more harm than good to the pregnancy, because a woman who's at rest, her hormones can lead to thrombosis or like clad in her bloodstream. So we try not to have them at bedrassed. Some exceptions might be maybe bleeding, maybe contractions before time, but we most of this time just ask the patient to slow down with whatever her activities are, but not complete bedrassed. So Dr. Let's talk about the decision making process throughout the pregnancy. Now obviously the surrogate always has a total autonomy of the body and I know that you would absolutely have got that. How do we create an environment where in any parents are informed and that decisions are made collectively? So we're all a team. So the medical team, the surrogate and the A piece, we're all part of the same team. We want healthy surrogate, healthy baby, right? So every decision has to come with that in our minds and in our thoughts. If I detect something that's abnormal, they have to speak to the surrogate, explain what's happening to the A piece, what's happening, and then I can explain the options we have or what I expect to happen and then we make a decision. But I agree with you and that's why I think we're working together, but that the surrogate has the last word about her body. Yeah, absolutely. I think we're all lined. It's it is about a team collective approach, but ultimately this is the surrogate's body. She has autonomy over it and respect it. She has to feel comfortable. She has to have that ability and know that she's got you on her side to be able to advocate for and that and again that's one of the reasons that we're we want to work with you because I think it is about safeguarding that and making sure everyone has a really positive experience. In honestly, if we're all the team, I don't see like a lot of situations where we would contradict each other. So maybe a surrogate wants something most probably the A piece two and myself two. There shouldn't be many surprises because of the way our team all worked together in terms of ensuring everyone is all on the same page. They shouldn't really be any unpleasant surprises. I think we're all we're all. We're all good with that. Final question is there is there is there anything that you think the antenna parents need to consider to prepare for this process because I think or to expect or miss. Yeah, because I think that often in tiny parents, you know, it's often been on a really long journey. Sometimes it's really exciting and they get to the point of having a confirmed pregnancy. What are some of the things that they should kind of prepare for and plan for, particularly with a journey in Mexico City? So with my team in the hospital, every question they have, most and should and will be answered. Mexican people are very kind and very supporting and I think they'll and we all try to make this the very best experience for pregnancy. I'm not sure. What else do you have in mind? No, that's perfect. That's perfect. No, but you're really relaxed on this. I love it. It's just like really easy to talk to you. I know just love the fact that you're going to be delivering all of these gorgeous babies for all of our IPs. That is just wonderful. So just thank you for all that you and your team do and we're really thrilled to be working with you. I think the world needs more doctor for renters and doctors. I don't know. Particularly in this field, you know, it's really important was that everyone gets that autonomy and everyone feels including and part of it because birth and pregnancy is very special, isn't it? It's so personal. It's so personal and particularly with those building their families for surrogacy, often it's not an easy it's not an easy road and often there's been a lot of challenges to get to this point. So these babies are so so wanted and I think it's such a special time to be involved with the pregnancy, but also to work with such a supportive team. So thank you. I think it's very easy for the surrogate to feel alone and also the IPs to feel that this is a journey that they're going through alone. So we will I think we all will try to make them feel otherwise there. We have a saying in the UK where we act as the scaffolding around these people to keep them up. You know, when it gets tough and you are a huge extending. - I'm sure that's got something. - Yes, and then also just one of the points is that our surrogate team will always accompany our surrogates to the hospital appointments. They'll make sure they get there and back safely and they'll be there to support them. I'm sure they won't need it because your team is there, but I just think it's important that they do have someone if they can't bring someone with them. - Yeah, always supported. - Well that was a really good play. - That was a good play. I knew this was gonna be nice. I just knew it. - I hope that the listener of the person watching really gets a sense of the consideration that's been put into this whole process. And I'm sure you will feel the warmth and energy from Dr. Friendsy and a team. And just how serious and considered this is, I don't wanna keep going over the top of my team. - No, I think it's a really important part and particularly if you're doing it outside of your comfort zone in a country where you're not familiar with and sometimes it's quite intimidating, but you're gonna make it the best game and you're gonna make it the best for them. Thank you. - So if you loved this episode, we're motoring towards the end of this special edition Mexico City, whatever I should say. But if you want more from this, you can head to our website at mysorrogsyjourney.com or you can head over to our socials to our, wherever you get your podcast, basically. - Well, I was just about to jump in and don't forget there's another episode available soon. - There is. - Hopefully the one after this will be covering the bath. - So it would flow really nicely, wouldn't it? So whether you're listening to this on our app, or via Spotify, Apple Podcast, Google, or YouTube, there's still time to get another fix. - There is. So thank you very much. - Thanks everybody, see you soon. - That's the lower guy. - Today's podcast was brought to you by Taluila and the Jude Productions. (upbeat music) (upbeat music)