Ryan Hamilton w/ Sam Morril & Mark Normand - We Might Be Drunk Podcast

Yo! Hey, hey! We're here. We're sweaty. It's hot. We're sweaty. Oh, was it 90-something? Yeah, 95. And the trains went down for like the first time. You didn't get hit with that. You're uptown. I was uptown, but I was coming crosstown and I got lucky in a cab. Oh, the cab. There was no traffic. What is this, 88? Taking cabs in New York. I don't know. I got lucky in a cab once. Her name was, uh, no. No, but, yeah, no, the train was like. Her name was Bob. It was a man. I was flated by a man in a taxi cab. No, uh, no, we, you know, the train, it's like, it feels like it never goes down. So you kind of, this happens and you're like, ah, I'm kind of grateful this never happens. I know, but it was creeping, which was the way it was just going just like an inch a mile, you know? And I was texting you and I didn't get, I was stuck in a no-service zone, so I was trying to text you, like, what's going on with you? Yeah. But. Yeah, right. No service. It's also crazy to think that, sorry, we'll get into this. Yeah, I love this. Crazy to think that, uh. Ryan's whole special is about how he was hit by a bus. We were like, we were delayed by a train. Yeah. Almost as bad. It's horrible. It's the worst, but crazy to think we used to not have cell phone service in the train. You just have to sit there and just, like, think and read. I remember when we got cell phone service in the train, I was like, my life's going to be so different. Yes, yes. You know? Hell, it's not. Yeah. They used to not tell you the time. You used to just go down there and be like, could be a minute, could be 20 minutes. Here's how our life is different. Some dude is watching, like, Waffle House fights next to you without headphones. And you're like, oh, that's not the technological advancement I was hoping for. I know. The casino gang, ting-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding. God, do you need the ting-a-ding? Sorry, Chinatown. Just saying. Enough. So Ryan, our good friend, Ryan Hamilton, who we've known for a long time. Long time. Yes, sir. New special on Netflix. This just hit me. It is killer. Killer. Very funny. This is the one. Just dense and like. Great ideas. Great angle. Great takes. How do you think of getting hit by a bus? That's a great idea. No, I mean, you say that at one point in the special. You're like, was it worth it? No. We'll tell that to Tracy Morgan. That was a truck, but still. Yeah, that was my first thought is, did he sue? Because you don't address that. Oh, yeah. Well, I have a joke that I say. I own a small shuttle bus company. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. But, yeah, I mean, that was obviously not like a bit of an exaggeration. But, yeah, we had a lawsuit, you know. Everybody said you got to do something. But I couldn't even deal with it for like a year mentally. I was just like, I don't want to think about it. So we did do it. But the company went out of business like a week after the accident. What? A week after. And my attorneys go, this is not unusual. It was called Jim's Shuttle Bus. And he thinks that they just like, this is bad. We're going to start a new company. It was a one-man band. I don't know. Jim was driving the bus. I don't know who it was. But, you know, they have an insurance company that's still like. Okay. So it wasn't, you know, it wasn't life-changing, anything like that. What? But the day that we filed the lawsuit, the insurance company came back. The day. Like, we filed in the morning. It's like they were waiting for it for a year. And they were like, here it is. This is the most we can do without going to trial. And my attorneys were like, this is the best. This is the best possible outcome. You don't want to go to trial. Oh, okay. Great. Yeah. But if you did, you could have wheeled in Hannibal Lecter style. Yeah. Like Weinstein. What about, yeah, I mean, 10 broken ribs. Yeah. Wow. Yeah. I didn't know there was 12 ribs either. So when you did that joke, I was like, 10 out of 12 you broke. Collapsed lung. Yeah. Yeah. Couldn't breathe. The lung heals fast, I learned. It's real interesting. The lung is. Unless you're David Tell. That one. It's good for him, right? Yeah. Yeah. Five of the ribs were in two places. Wow. So a couple of them healed like this. But I got really lucky because there was no, like sometimes they say ribs heal in a way that causes pain and then they have to go in and put like a plate like I have in my arm in your ribs. But I didn't have any of that. Nice. Yeah. So you didn't get, you weren't on your phone or anything. You just walked out and got. No, I was, you know, it was late. It was like I watched the ball drop and it was like, I don't know, two or something in the morning. You know, I'd been in a hotel for 10 days with COVID. Sure. In LA. Quarantining. Yeah. Quarantining. And so January 1 was my. My first day out. And I ate an entire pizza and I celebrated. I'm like out of here. Yeah. And I wasn't flying because flying was so crazy. I was just trying to get home to Idaho for the holidays. And even though the holidays were over, but I walked to pick up a rental car. I just thought I'm going to go do it. This place is open 24 hours. I got to the intersection, hit the button, watch the light change. And I just started walking and I didn't see or hear anything. Oh God. Yeah. This guy was making a left hand turn. He was up high. He'd just dropped. He dropped people off, I think. And. Did you go out immediately when you hit me? Were you knocked out? No, I didn't. I never lost consciousness. No, he got up. Yeah. That was like one of the biggest laughs of the special. Oh, that's right. You freaked him out by. You say, I got up and they were like, what the hell? Yeah. Yeah, exactly. It really freaks people out. And yeah, I mean, I remember it all. I just remember everything. But there was a point where I was like, okay, I got to make my whole priority to not pass out. Wow. But you felt the lung. Yeah. I was standing up. And, you know, I talk about this in the special where I had my hand there, but I couldn't see it, but I knew it was there. Whoa. And then I realized that my hand was behind my back. Whoa. And that's when I went, oh, and the line was, that's the punch line to that. My God. You know, even the jackass guys were like, that guy's a badass. That's crazy. Yeah. Except this was not intentional. Yeah. But it's, yeah, it almost feels old fashioned to get hit by a car. It's scrolling. It feels like most people probably get hit now scrolling. Yeah, it's interesting. I got a lot of, you know, I learned a little bit about during COVID, a lot of pedestrian accidents went way up. The numbers went way up. Because you think the roads are completely open. Yeah, I guess. And people are just more distracted, stressful. I don't know what it is. They don't really know why, but they went way up. Interesting. Yeah. Pedestrian accidents. I feel like I think people get a little reckless in the city streets during COVID. I knew everyone I knew was like getting a scooter. Yeah. That's true. And then Monroe Martin. Monroe Martin lost his two front teeth. And I was like. Is that right? Yeah, because it's not just other people you got to worry about. It's like potholes and stuff. It could be anything that could send you flying. But yeah. Wow. So many people. I was thinking about getting a scooter. And then I heard about the accidents. I was like, fuck that. Yeah. But it was fun for a minute. Like the idea of just zipping through a ghost town. Oh, I was going up and down Broadway alone on my moped. It was awesome. Wow. Everybody either got a scooter or a dog. Or had a baby. Or had a baby. And then when COVID ended, they were like, I hate all these. I regret everything. Wow. Oh, man. A lot of COVID cohabitation. A lot of people just moving in together. I mean, I did that, too. I mean. Yeah. Some marriages. Yeah. Crazy. Yeah. Yikes. Yeah. This was at the very end. This was like during the Omicron variant. Oh, sure. It was like my first gig back. I was coming from Hawaii. It was like 40 years ago. I know. It's insane. Sounds like the Avengers. It was the Omicron sequel. The blip. Yeah. The good thing is. Well, horrible thing. But I'm always hung over on January 1st. And I always see people walking around. I'm like, look at these loser nerds out there. And now I'm glad I'm hung over. Because you're getting hit on January 1st. Yeah. Yeah. It was. Yeah. Do you have to fight? Because your jokes are all clean. There's definitely. You're clean in the way like Gaffigan's clean. Where there is like an edge to it. There's a bite. There's a bite. Yeah. But do you have to fight certain thoughts when something that bad happens to you? To, you know. Because if that happened to me, I'd be like, fuck these people. Yeah. I guess it dies down. You see the comedy soon enough. But are there jokes that you have to like fight off? You have to think positively. Does that help the healing even? I don't know. That's just how it came out. Honestly, I couldn't think about it comedically for like months. Like three or four months. It was like, it was weird. The first day, I was like, okay, jokes, jokes. Because that's where we're at in our life. Right, right, right. And then I didn't realize what had happened to me really. Yes. And then I'm laying in the hospital after the surgery. Actually, Tommy Johnigan came to visit me the first day. He somehow got into the hospital. He was like, I saw this silhouette. I didn't have my glasses on in the door. And it looked like my doctor. And I go, Dr. Lee? And Tommy walks up. He goes, I'm your brother now. Because that's what he had to get in the hospital. It was full of COVID. And he brought me a notebook. So we started like working on ideas. What a friend. What a guy. Yeah. And then I thought, well, this is really interesting. And then the next day, I realized I can't do jokes right now. Like I just was like absorbing what happened. It's too much. You've got to be a human for a second. And you need to like, so when something like traumatic happens, I feel like you have to like take a step back and look at yourself. You can't just be like, joke, joke, joke. Yes, yes. Yeah, yeah, exactly. Even with like a breakup, even something that simple. Yeah. I think your mind goes, yeah. But sometimes, I don't know how it goes with you guys, but sometimes my mind goes like too dark and it'll be funny to me. But they're just like, whoa. Oh, that was a big part of developing this material is like in the beginning, it was like, this is funny, but it was hard for people to enjoy it. And I had to figure out a lot of my stuff is like that. I got to figure out a way to bring it palette, make it palatable. Yes, yes, totally. So it's like this evolution. And eventually you go, okay, now people are having fun. They're thinking about it, but it's not bumming them out. But there's also so much pressure. Anytime something crazy happens, people go, oh, you're going to get eight hours out of that. You're going to get a half hour out of that. You're like, oh, am I? Now I have to? And now you're worried about it. And you're like, I'm a shitty comic because I can't think of anything. But that's why it takes a minute. The pressure on top of it sucks. Yeah. But what you do really well in this is you play with tension. You can tell that a lot of those people those jokes didn't work at first because of how much you're letting lines hang out. Oh, you know, good air. Interesting. Yeah, yeah. yeah it is true it was like it's it was in the beginning it was like i don't know if this is gonna work or not like i can't figure it out but then eventually but it was also like i couldn't not talk about you gotta talk i'd never had a thing in my life like i'd gone through my whole career going oh that's interesting what do i want to talk about this was totally different my audience knew about it it was impossible not to talk about it well the crazy thing was seeing ryan work it out at the cellar and then you know doing 15 minutes on getting hit by a bus and then you'd come back another night and you're like that's a different 15 about getting hit yeah you had a lot of material a lot of bus stuff it was hard to work it out in short sets because it turned into this long thing so i would do it in different wow that's impressive yeah i don't know how that it just kind of happened and then there was a point where it was like okay i think i'm i just can't think about this anymore and people were like no you gotta make a one-man show right kind of thing like it becomes unfunny but then it becomes even funnier again because you keep going with it right right right and then right when when we got the deal and i started going okay it's an hour i got it i was like oh i gotta add some stuff here so i added this part the part with the hand and the part about um getting marijuana with my mom that was all like really new nice so like yeah you get the weirdos reaching out like i got hit by a bus too you get like i meet so many people after shows yeah who talk about it i never met anyone before but now you know once you say it people come out of the woodwork yeah his audience takes a long time to load in these days yeah are you scared of buses i'm more scared of driving actually that's the thing that stuck with me it's like interesting you know i think twice about taking road trips now just because i don't know it put into me something like anything can happen at any moment and when you're driving you start if that's your mindset you're like there's stuff happening all over the place who knows what that guy's doing crazy it's like the concept of driving is bananas the fact that these painted lines are keeping us safe at 68 miles an hour with kids in the car i'm drinking it's horrible it's a crazy concept but it works kind of right i know mark's hour is going to be he killed a guy crossing the street and then i hit him that's my title whoa yeah yeah yeah so is it what was the process like having nate bargazzi direct the special oh i mean question well what was great about it is that nate just you know i wanted to nate kept going i want to produce your hour and i kept going i'm trying to sell it i want to try to sell it you know he wanted to put it up on youtube or whatever it's like he was building that platform so i said i'm gonna i nobody was biting but i thought i'm gonna put up the money produce it myself if i can't if i can't get it out there if i can't sell it then let's talk and then nate called me like a week later and was like let's do it at netflix i go what do you mean he goes i called netflix and they want to do it okay that's fantastic because i'd be i go i've been talking to netflix for like a year ah that's frustrating yeah but then nate really got behind it and um i just was happy that he believed in it you know believed in me as a comedian and the material and and uh so that was really great that is great and he just kind of let me do whatever i want you know nate gave me he's just like whatever you you know whatever you want to do good yeah it's cool though when a comedian directs because you know uh jerry directed the colin quinn one yes colin quinn's directing the new dan soda one is that right yeah so there's something cool in it because like what is really directing a special it's like yeah no director's gonna be better at it than a comic right agreed we know where to put the cameras yeah you know yeah i directed mine they had a director and i was like why what are you gonna do you got a big bugle horn and a clipboard and a chair and a beret like what is i'm just gonna stand there and tell the jokes i directed mine to my new one too because i just figured like yeah i know i know where to do it yeah you get a good dp and you're and you're all set yeah exactly that's kind of how i felt going through it it was like you know i talked to people jerry uh was really like helpful and i had so many conversations with him and the title is his credit he came up with the title you know and he was really helpful with the material and he'd seen it was familiar with a lot of it so wow you know talking to him and talking through it he was just like and he'd talked about producing it for a while he was like let's talk about this let's do it he was so busy with the movie and everything and then nicky was like let me do it for a while everyone's fighting over you that's a good sign you know it was just kind of like everybody's so busy and then i'm like well i'm gonna do it and then at the last minute nate was like let's try it so yeah the beauty of nate letting you do whatever you want to do yeah also means he has to do nothing yeah you know which is great for comics we're like you go you i believe in you i'll be here not answering the phone but great for him to produce it and call netflix and netflix just just accept things when we when we try to give them to you stop waiting for a famous rich guy to call what's the difference the special's on either way yeah yeah who knows what i don't know what's going on i think they put the name on it they put nate bergazzi on it maybe i don't know actually you get another guy uh pushing it though why not you know another comedian's pushing the special it's a good thing yeah but imagine if i was like hey uh sam goes up and talks to some hot lady at a bar and she's like no and then nate's like you should fuck sam i've actually i've had maybe i will do that before actually oh really he's done that for me a few times it just doesn't make sense but i'm a cunt what do i know okay i mean that's what happened us back in the day on comedy central is they wanted to give him those hours if amy schumer didn't just call them and say give him an hour completely so i mean that you know if that's what it takes you know some people are going to luck out and some people are not so many of our breaks in this business i i don't know if people know come from each other other comedians you know all these people these gatekeepers decision makers whatever but it's like once somebody gets something then they're like how can i get these people involved who i know yes you know and you know what's a great compliment to you is i saw your special when the day it came out it hit number 10 and you're like hey ryan's in the top 10 great news all right and then it bumped up to seven yeah that's rare is it yeah i don't follow these rankings but that's what everybody keeps telling me that that's huge yeah it was up there i think it was seven for a couple days then i went back down to nine and then i was like oh my god i'm gonna be like oh my god i'm gonna be like oh my god and then it was gone i think but yeah it was um yeah i was happy to hear it that's that's great that means enough people were like word of mouthing about it right that more people saw it right that's that's a huge it's so weird you have no concept of how it's going i mean you hear online and like whatever but you can't you don't really know we're gonna talk about in 20 years ago man remember netflix they paid us the bare minimum then we didn't know the numbers for years and all this and we're gonna go what the hell were you thinking but that's how it is you know yeah yeah everything it changes a lot and it changes quickly now yes yeah that's the crazy thing is like i heard someone make a joke about cso and quibi the other day and i was like oh shit remember that oh and i was dying i was clawing to get on we were pitching the show mark joe listen i pitched a show to to uh quibi back in the day yeah called jokes jokes jokes so it's just like short sets with a bunch of comedians doing jokes and they were like we're listening and then they were like getting a call from your agent quibi passed yeah yeah and we were like no we're finished quibi i just watched chipotle i couldn't afford it oh fuck but we made a cool sizzle i mean the sizzle's out there still somewhere oh yeah we felt like it was cool to do like because that was not in the heels but like the blue collar comedy tour was so big right like oh we should just do our own thing and then our agents were like just three white guys telling jokes we're like yeah i guess it's not a good time it was like it was like 2018 when everyone's like like we're good on white guys we're just like they were like add some diversity and we're like yeah we just threw down the toilet yeah well i remember because i didn't know anything about show business so they would send us a list of comments like you should use these people i'm like she sucks and they're like yeah but we need diversity i was like but she's terrible and i was like we can get you good diversity so that turned into a thing where we were like okay we'd host the the pilot episode then we just book a bunch of funny new york people exactly or la people whatever but uh but it was a glimpse into that world of like she's a black woman so you put it you're like but she's the worst kind of comic in the city yeah we're like we literally gave them a list of like funny black women yeah oh we don't know them we're like this is your job to know exactly exactly right they're clueless yeah that's why they're gone quibs see you in hell still still upset about quibble it never goes away i saw i saw an interview from way back in the day chris rock talking about the comic strip and i forgot i think it was like lucian the booker back in the day and they asked him about lucian and chris rock was like well he thought this guy was funnier than me and i was like holy shit i'm not gonna be able to do that i'm not gonna be able to do that i'm not gonna be able to do that wow but you hold it with you of course of course yeah yeah it's like that guy's just like conquered stand-up the most right yeah right and then he's like this fucking one club dude i know i've been really trying to focus on like what can i control you know that's it we get so crazy but it's like basically if you just create and keep writing something will happen eventually and and it's so stressful to think about all the other stuff so it's just like if you focus on that that's the best way to be happy i think in this i think you're right the next special is i got caught under a train is that why they were so slow today no it's i hear what you're saying though it's like you kept a good attitude about it but it's uh it's interesting also you you were really good at milking as much like certain people you gallman gaffigan yes it's weird that i'm thinking it's a hot air balloon bit that was seven eight minutes that was a classic hot air balloon bit look it up that's your that's your hot pockets i get that yeah i'm doing this crazy thing you might guys might be interested in this now sometimes if i have to do like an encore or at the end of the show if it's really great or whatever i have never been asked for an encore you know what i'm talking about you know when you get done and like everybody's there and you're like let's just hang out for a minute right um the gym cancellation bit and the hotter balloon bit are the ones that people go i want to hear that and i've been doing this crazy thing where i do them at the same time and i go back and forth i cut back and forth between them and every comic who sees it goes this is wild that it works and i can't even believe that it works wait a minute how does that make sense though you like remixed you like dj remixing your jokes yes so yes exactly i call it a mash-up and and it just happened naturally one night when it was like in this crazy insane audience in this small room and it was just like you could do whatever you want and i'm backstage and the stage manager goes i think you're gonna go back out there it was like the only time in my career where they were like they just kept going and i went back out and i didn't have anything and then i was like these are the two jokes i know you want to hear and something was just like let's just see what happened they were so good i felt so free and they were so familiar so i just went back and forth and i just cut it up so it works you know you end on a punch line then you start another thing and when you start the other thing they laugh because they're like oh we remember right right oh that's funny yeah yeah that's kind of a new you invented like a new isn't that wild it's crazy that a comic who doesn't do drugs came up with this idea yeah it feels like such a like a guy who had too many drinks and he stumbles into something really good it sounds like a really bad idea maybe it is i don't know if it sounds like it kills it works it's a speedball it kind of surprises me yeah but it's interesting yeah i don't know but i find when you this idea about like getting stuff stretched out it's like i've always thought and maybe it is like when you're working in this broad kind of observational way you get some momentum is so much more valuable than it's so much easier to keep it going and start a new yes yes so that's it's kind of like i see it as like a lazy thing i'm just like i got it let's just keep it going it's so much easier yeah like doing what like hedberg would do like that is really hard that's so hard artist you're starting to zero every joke yeah he's over to meet you martin he had a scroll with these little bullet points on it i was like god what a nightmare right exactly it's a hard way to work so this is like you know that's a good point yeah list always said a premise is harder to come up with than a than a line so once you got the premise just get everything you can out of it because i think that's the same yeah they come out of thin air you know joe used to write much shorter he definitely that's true i mean i guess we all kind of i yeah yeah too i think you get that's a skill for a while and you're like i gotta fill time yeah you've got some great stories right yeah i know uh yeah well it's like it's funny you said that people come out of the woodwork about about who have been in car crashes or anything got hit by a car because i get all these rat people now oh really weird audience they're like i had a rat well everybody's had a rat once yeah so it's not everybody in their house i've never had you never had a rat in your house oh most people don't have rats in their homes okay mice yeah mice is nothing i guess i'm thinking mouse rat okay no they're dude once you have one in your home ain't the same yeah that's true a rat is terrifying the teeth they're big that crazy tail i had another rat in my place whoa can i tell you this and he left and we found the hole but i was like i don't need another i don't need a part two to this no well maybe you do maybe you do god saw me struggling with jokes he's like yeah let me throw you yeah damn the rat the rat saga yeah you don't choose what you know what hits you of course of course right and you never know it's kind of like going viral you never know what's going to happen you never know what's going to happen you never know what's going to pop you know the rat thing who would have thought that would be your thing it's not even out yet but i was doing enough at live shows that people would hit me up but that yeah that's not even that's in the one i just taped but if they hit you up now imagine when that thing goes global you're gonna be the rat guy you're gonna have that big rat king the rat we got you a movie it's it's you and a bunch of rats isn't that willard yeah willard too that looked weird as hell oh yeah i just i never wanted to watch rats nah no thank you now are you in that i need new material phase oh yeah i put the thing out i'm back to square one yeah that's where i'm at which to me you know it got me thinking about the cycle and i think this is the most fun part of the cycle oh no i disagree i hate it i think it's it depends the editing part's so tedious yeah and this part the discovery part is the most rewarding i think because you you just grab something during the day and then you take it to the club and and if it works it's like that's the best feeling yeah when you have like an hour and you're like how do i get this ready to put on tape yeah that's to me just exhausting and also you feel fraudulent a little bit because you're like yeah kill but it's supposed to kill i'm about to take who cares sure it's a lot of who cares sets tinkering you're right it's boring and if you lower your bar for these new sets and you just go in there and you get one line or one bit you're like all right i guess that was a win yeah that's a huge win but you said momentum i feel like i have no momentum with the new yeah it's yeah it's true it's it's it's stressful when you're like on the road and everybody's there to see yes that's very stressful and it's like why did i give up my act yes that's the safety of that act seinfeld talks about boleros he's like i walk into there with like full ammunition when you have an hour and i'm like yes i love that feeling but now i got like a cap gun and a slingshot i'm like trying to fight off uh the the crips and the bloods but those but you do it for those nights like your closing bit is a callback and that hit you on stage probably did it hit you on stage or was it something that like you were just interesting it was like um i had that joke i i the the first callback where i say uh um he looks young from up here came because i was doing i did that joke on the tonight show and i remember that's a great end yeah and i was like walking around one day and i just was like wow that's because i'd never put those jokes together like yeah yeah and then in a tonight show you're forced to and then i got wow that's good and then i was like i'll close with that but i didn't have the bus line as the like they're two callbacks right so and uh actually the bus hey phil hanley shut up buy his book yep yeah i was like what do i got i can't get i can't tie it together and then he said i had a second thing yeah you used to always say have even on late night sets phil used to always say have two in the chamber as in like as i have a second closer if one line kills leave on that right but if it doesn't get the pop you want you have a second one hey that's good like a gun in your boot yeah you like save that you save a bit right or you don't save a bit but i like it save a bit you got to walk off which is nice i had the thing once on the tonight show where you do a lot it gets a big pop you're ending it gets a big pop you get an applause and then i did the tag and i got nothing and i was like ah i should have done the tag i could have walked into the sunset like a hero i think that happens a lot on late night because you end up getting a bigger reaction than normal yes yes and you're like normally i need to do this other line but exactly you know exactly yeah and also you're kind of like just doing the this is how i say yes yes yes yeah you find it too when you move a joke around a set like you're like this tag kills mid-set but if you move it to a closer because late nights you're tinkering with order it's yeah totally right totally for sure i know i just did the tonight show and it was like oh yeah i remember it's kind of like a lost art completely i think it's like knowing latin yeah knowing how to kill fallon you're like you're like it's like you're like this is i guess this is good like once a year maybe someone thinks it's cool really impress yeah like a girl on a date yeah you're like i get a latin all right the tonight show but it's still fun it's so fun it's fun yeah and that pressure is good for you you know you're standing back there behind that curtain and you're like wow this feels like show business yes cool thing 30 rock yeah suit on yeah yeah the only problem i guess the times are changing i did uh seth meyers i don't know a couple months ago to promote my special and i'm walking around like what are all these people doing here we don't we need seth meyer we need one lady to get coffee and a guy on the lights all these people have clipboards headsets i'm like this is all a waste of money no wonder the internet's winning right i think they're all union and whatnot no there's a lot of employees a lot of employees it's it's yeah it's unnecessary you need a makeup person you know uh the lighting guy the camera guy and seth right what are we doing here you got a time machine almost completely yeah because yeah it's it's i mean that's why they run so well those shows because it's like they've so many people i guess so but but then you leave and you do one of these on your phone it gets more views this is not a not a good sign for the uh the showbiz part yeah it's hard i mean if you build something if you put something on the platform yourself it feels like it generates you know your followers get if they put something and then it's you're you're trying to grab their followers you know i guess so yeah and there is a legitimacy aspect to it like oh you're on seth meyers on tonight's show today oh you feel kind of cool yeah but it does bug me and i know i'm a dude but when they cut a line they cut a line for my myers thing they got a big pop but it was like too spicy and you're like what am i doing here right i came here to give you me i gave you me it hit yeah that's my whole thing is to do well right it went well it's too spicy for you guys so you cut it so you're like i'll just do the internet it happened to me too once i did daily show and i got a huge laugh on a trans joke you got an applause break wow it was a it was a good bit on the daily show of all places and i and they it was like my biggest pop of the set and they cut it and i think they probably cut it maybe because trevor left oh i wonder if they were like this is not good for him to laugh at this yeah you don't want to live maybe they were like yeah we should cut that yeah it's better of safe than sorry they're like what do we get out of him getting a laugh you know but it was like the joke for my special that you've changed joke it's a good joke great joke but uh yeah you're right i mean it's but that's what they're competing with now so you're competing with a thing where like well these other shows aren't going to censor anything yes but i do really miss like not just panel but the stand-up like the excitement of like anything live crowd is so fun doing panel is fun yeah oh it's so fun because you get to work it's literally what we do yeah but yeah it's it feels like it doesn't have much longer i know well you know just like has that great line where he's like the what is it something is the getting away with it the goal is getting away with not just not just being edgy and offensive it's getting the laugh on it so when you get that's why it's annoying that's why it's annoying because you get the laugh and you're like all right it worked i did i took the risk i stuck my neck out and it worked and then you cut it yeah so you're like i got away i did my part that's why it's a panel when they cut it yeah panel i was cooking because the stand-up is all pre-approved generally so you kind of know right they tinker dude oh yeah oh no at your level you've been doing this for long is it annoying how much they're tinkering with the set or is it kind of just clean they did not tinker with my set at all he's pretty you know uh yeah they they requested a joke they go we love this joke we've seen you do it oh you do that joke so i kind of built the set around that i go yeah and and this whole set was not in the special which was unusual for me it was just like happened wow so that it was all fresh from the special but but is that weird because like you could why do you cut those jokes yeah because i taped them and i i probably pulled out i don't know 15 minutes from the special that i just was like these are good jokes let's put them in there but then when i'm doing the edit it's like why make it longer it wasn't adding to the flow they were good but it wasn't like you know how there's a rhythm to an hour set and it's like let's kind of make it shorter than longer like the goal is to get people to watch the whole thing it's so hard anyway right so it was like these jokes are good they're good but they're not adding anything to whatever you want to call it a narrative or wow or anything that's impressive i just took them out but it's also like it's so valuable because yes i need this stuff to share so i remember like louis would be promoting something he would go on snl and he would work on an snl set i was like wow he's so good that he's like gonna write 11 new minutes for snl monologue and then he still has an hour that's well the hardest thing about the snl monologue is those crowds are fucking brutal yeah this was back you know 10 years ago when they were when they were a little little looser yeah but i feel like man i've seen some great comics going there crazy and you see the jokes kill all week at the cellar crazy on there and you're like that's all they got on that they're so nervous it's like weirdly conservative you're like an old lady with the the pearl necklace like you're like you're supposed to be the fun young kids the live they're scared to be on camera laughing i guess so maybe yeah it's yeah that's really the only place you do stand up live live right it's like being broadcast good point everything else is pre-taped live yeah you know the sebastian story he did the tonight show and just froze he just went mentally blank and he was like ah and this is a big arena comic going mentally blank it's like a get for them and he was just like jimmy i don't know my line wow and then he kind of like after he said that he's like i got it i got it and they edited it but he's like my career's over i'm fucked he talked about it on a podcast but they figured it out and tweaked it i think that's i had a panic moment this last one i did i couldn't believe it you know i've been through it a bunch of times where i'm like okay good i wasn't nervous i look fine this the way you look to me is the most stressful part of the thing it's like if i get the suit together then i'm like okay i'm fine that's funny and i felt okay that way and then i'm backstage behind the curtain you know and you go through your set a hundred times and they make you do the bullet points which i never like the bullet points because i'm like i know what i'm doing but they want i think they feel better if you have the bullet points and then so it kind of got in my head like what's the second bullet point and i'm like i don't know what i'm doing but they want i think they feel better if you have and then i'm standing behind the stage looking good you pulled it off it's okay yeah it's great suit is so hard for me to get we could talk suits that's sharp as hell yeah you like it yeah yeah you're one of the best dressed comics uh working what the hell are you talking i text you yeah about like someone's i'm getting an outfit you're one of my go-to's you own a yacht you look great oh good if i need something for a tv thing i after tan france ryan's probably you have to go to the gate i've learned a lot about suits and color actually over the years and because i could never fit anything off the rack this is the first suit that i've ever worn off the rack on tv and it actually looked okay no no uh tailoring i mean we took it in on the sides but like i didn't have it made that's a good pick yeah wow and um showbiz but i forgot my second line behind the i'm like i know that i'm like i don't know what the second thing is and i started panicking and i felt my heart rate go up and then i just thought once you say the first thing i you're gonna click into the second thing and that's what i told myself and i went out there and that's what happened but i didn't know it as i was walking out i'm like do you ever get this before you tape a special this happens to me almost every time i'm like i don't know my joke all the time all the time i have to listen to the set and i'm like i don't i still don't know them all the time then you go out you just know them it's muscle memory but you really do go blank yeah yeah and it's like as if there's not enough stress taping something with you know netflix or whoever there and then you're just like i don't know any of these it's completely weird the rhythm gets me back in i start telling the first thing you're like oh that's how it goes you can't think about it it's like a boner if you think about it too much it's not gonna come you gotta let it just happen yeah and it's so scary because you're like i'm just gonna trust that but what if i go out there you know but that's why you do the road and that's why you do all the sets but dude i've been there so many times where i'm like not only do i write out the set list yeah each big show you're like all right let me write it all down just so i have the notes right i feel like just using a pen it's like muscle yeah it's muscle memory but then you also just it's good for memorization right yeah but i go blank man i do too i think it's normal it's weird it's happened a few times but this one was like wow i'm scared i was actually legit like scared funny thing is if you fucking broke it probably get more views i know so true that's the sad truth of it but i mean you don't want those views but right right right yeah yeah it's still there's something there's still an art to killing on late night there's hell yeah really cool like complete tightrope moment i love when i see a young comic kill on late night yeah there's something very cool about that that's very cool because you know it's huge for them yes like it legit it goes from the point in your career where you're like everybody's going what are you doing with your life to finally you can go like they can go oh you're actually a comedian exactly it's almost like stage acting yes versus like yeah because it's like all right it's not going to get the eyeballs right but like a real comic should be able to do this yeah yeah good good point right you know what the worst part about late night is though is you know what the worst part about late night is you know what the worst part about late night is you know what the worst part about late night is you know what the - You don't have that? - I know what you're saying. - All right, all right. - You wanna overdo it, but if you feel, yeah, I mean, don't feel comfortable because it's new but if you felt like yeah i mean i've seen you rock a suit to gigs i've seen you rock uh you know you did it on tonight's show you did it like tonight's show you're supposed to i feel like but like milaney's a suit every night yeah at the theater which is i'm not knocking it i'm just saying i have a thing where i'm like i can't i'm a child i think it makes me you you perform different you're i do think you the way you dress affects the way you perform a little bit i think i act differently in a suit than i do it makes me stand up a certain way it makes me go like i gotta be this guy which sometimes is really good for the performance yeah and i if i'm just wearing a t-shirt i'm a little more relaxed or whatever so it is a consideration either way i'm not saying either way is right or wrong but i do feel there that happens maybe i'll wear a suit see what happens maybe i'll try it don't let those guys get to you they're getting they've been getting me for 42 years we should call ari and be like no fuck you dude it's everybody it's list it's you it's uh i wore a suit i can't wear a suit in my last two specials that's true that's true you look great you look good i just taped it you look great you look good and i made a point not to go look at the suit guy over here because i don't want people to do that to me i'm just like i don't care a tear comes i will say you got to get the right one and it's a lot of work for some people you gotta find the right one gotta fit right the fit is everything the fit and the drape i think for a cool gig i'd like yeah i just wanted it's gonna live forever so yeah but then also you don't want to be too different than as you're saying it's gonna live forever so yeah but then also you don't want to every night so right but yeah but bringing a suit on the road if you're doing like like i was on the bus dealing with like it's a lot of work that's a lot yeah it's a lot so i wouldn't do that but yeah but sometimes you bring a yeah you know depends it was silly blazer like i'd be in miami i'd rock like a light blue one or something you know well yeah that was cool it's fun i told you my fonzie moment what was your oh this is this is exactly what i'm talking about hey fabletics i love me some fabletics i'm wearing them right now these are fabletics pants i get tired of constantly buying clothes that cost a fortune and don't fit right that's why i've been checking out fabletics when you sign up as a new vip you get 70 to 80 off everything so instead of buying one overpriced shirt you can actually stock up on shorts workout gear travel clothes and stuff you wear every day what surprised me most was the quality it feels like the expensive activewear brands but without paying premium prices everything is lightweight breathable comfortable and actually holds up ain't that the truth best part is i don't wear it i don't wear it just wear it to the gym it's 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hymns.com slash drunk not available in all 50 states prescription required see website for details restrictions and important safety information sildenafil is a generic version of viagra viagra is a registered trademark with viatras especially llc hymns is not affiliated with or endorsed by viatras so i bought a leather jacket i've always wanted a leather jacket but i can't wear i can't i'm not a leather jacket guy i think you've even said to me before like you where did you get that jacket i want to try something like yeah yeah good leather jacket you have good style yeah i've been trying pull up some some ryan images because this guy is underrated is this the one about the other guy getting stolen no no worse worse what happened but i actually got that one back by the way uh so i i bought this leather jacket from italy yeah i really went in and found the right jacket from rome you guys know that brand italy well i'm just saying it's uh important yeah it's good stuff yeah so uh i bought a leather jacket from italy i got it tailored it fits like a glove i look great the wife's like you look hot here we go but i never wear it because i'm it's a leather jacket so i went to do it and i'm like oh my god i'm gonna wear it and i'm like oh my god i'm gonna wear it in canada and i said i'm putting the leather jacket in the suitcase so i have to wear it yeah it's cold there i'm forcing myself to wear it i couldn't wear it on the plane could wear the uber but it's it's in the bag yeah so i got to canada i put the leather jacket on i'm doing this big theater i walk out and somebody goes nice jacket fonzie within like six minutes of me performing ari flew out just to dig you nice jacket fonzie and it got my head the whole set of laughs wow it killed it killed he was right wow and uh yeah but you know what there's the problem oh that's a great joke i bet it was i bet it was a big fan maybe you talk about this shit i knew he could get to you well he got to me it worked we telegraph these thoughts to the audience sometimes i i it's weird one time i was on a show this was a long long time ago i was on the road with ari spears for this competition that we won and i'm hosting at all of the improvs and i was always worried about time and so i went out and i bought a jacket and i was like oh my god i'm gonna wear it and i bought a watch and i never wear a watch and i bought this like august is the perfect time to reset before the fall rush and your closet is a good place to start that's why i love shopping at quince quince is all about fewer better pieces their clothes are made with premium materials built to last and designed to become the things you wear every day they have ultra soft organic cotton tees and premium mongolian cashmere sweaters you can take them from a casual work day to dinner perfectly and if you're hanging on to worn out basics quince makes it easy to upgrade with premium denim and tailored chinos starting at just sixty dollars everything at quince is priced at 50 to 80 percent less than similar brands and they work directly with ethical factories and cut out the middlemen i love quince you know mark and i wear this stuff all the time it's uh quality stuff it's nice we get compliments on it they're like look at you you look like not a piece of shit and i say i'm not a piece of shit that's why i look that way so really nice uh sweater i got a nice button down short sleeve tee that i've been getting a lot of compliments on looks nice and quince offers more than clothing they have hotel quality bedding bath essentials premium cookware and the travel must-haves upgrade your everyday go to quince.com slash wmbd for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns now available in canada and the uk too that's q-u-i-n-c-e.com slash wmbd for free shipping and 365 day returns quince.com slash wmbd digital watch and i'm doing my set and somebody goes nice watch it was the first day i ever wore it oh god it was just like that yeah like i couldn't recover they know they somehow they can send they know they know but if you wore it with confidence if you were comfortable with it i bet they would never they it's weird it also sucks that like mark's honing these jokes he's working really hard on and nice jacket fonzie crushes crushes that's so annoying fonzie really yeah ego yeah through the floor right then fonzie oh god now you now you really can't wear a leather jacket because people are gonna listen to this that's true i'll be fonzie forget them you can wear a denim jacket nice jacket leno yeah i think you could i do that i think that jacket looks cool as fuck all right those all look great those are great looks that's a suede jacket i got that at the mall great i think for this stage yeah suede is very nice yeah suede is a nice jacket i think for this stage yeah suede is very nice yeah suede is a nice It's not crazy. crazy cool guy but it's not it's still a little elevated but not too much yeah all right get off me well yeah this is this is nice jacket indiana jones yeah exactly nice jacket tombstone it is funny because you do think about that like oh i mean just going to the cellar you're like what would keith robinson say exactly that's what i'm talking about we all have that one well it's like it's you're that's the first target for anything is what you're wearing you don't think i'm sick of nick shirts i can't take i can't mix it up at this point yeah you know the derosa story he walked in with his new leather jacket 10 15 years ago and and uh big j goes ah derosa got his attitude jacket you know why it hurts so bad because they're right it cuts to the bone you're in my head you're getting roasted by a guy with fingerless gloves because he's comfortable in the fingerless gloves yeah exactly because you can say to him he's like he's like yeah i like him and you're like oh shit exactly comfort is is key comfort wins yes because you go hey nice gloves he's like yeah i like him yeah damn it it didn't work didn't get him derosa you could tell us because derosa is actually a pretty good dresser yeah not bad he's kind of like a sneaky good dresser yes but uh yeah you could tell that that's so funny so anyone who takes a risk oh completely you can't take a risk in this biz yeah and you need that a little i'm not even saying it's all bad i'm saying a little bullying is good right but uh not going all the way yeah well don't let him get you down i think you should wear a suit i bet you'd look great in a suit you do man you've seen you i've seen you do it looks good yeah i'll throw a suit on in the theater not in a club yeah we're starting to go a little gray too in our hair it's like you can't just rock a bomber jacket forever it's a good point it's a good point you can't be you can't be 60 and like a fucking yeah seinfeld always says your little zip ups yeah look at you you look good there man oh thank with the banana yeah seinfeld calls him i had to ruin it i was feeling weird the suit so like all right i gotta yuck it up you're in a tie you're holding a dildo mark why couldn't you just smile on the suit i know uh sorry i cut you off seinfeld always calls them uh our rake and leaves jackets wow these bombers are kind of nice rake and leave what's he raking leaves in yeah gucci well jerry do you see that when he was wearing the kith stuff he looked kind of cool on it oh they look great the thing about a suit too is like it's evergreen so you're never gonna be dated right unless but you do watch the guys in the 90s and the style was baggier than yeah way back a little bit where you're like dude double you're like double breasted and kind of like baggy shoulders yeah yeah oh while we got you here we got to get to the bottom of the private jet from la he was there oh yeah on the jet i was on that jet and and you guys i saw you talking about it on the episode and yeah we were waiting for you come on no i i met jerry at the way they thought we were gonna come yeah well i'm i'm at the airport and then jerry jerry goes uh guess who's on the flight and i go who it was mark and sam and i go oh this is gonna be fun yeah yeah damn uh well you want to paint the picture because i thought it was a fake invite no it wasn't a fake invite i guess and then jessica came later and she said she filled us in or whatever i don't know damn that would have been fun yeah it would have been fun damn it yeah whatever it's no big deal there'll be other opportunities yeah yeah it's cool anything good happened on the plane did we miss any any fomo stuff uh no we i mean we just it was fun because i i was hanging out with jerry uh jerry and jessica at the same time which i don't get a lot of time with them together so that was fun so there was just a lot of recapping you know so much happened at the festival sure i didn't go to that dinner or whatever but oh the party i was hearing about that oh yeah the the afternoon brunch thing yeah uh yeah what i don't know jerry and i were just on our way to work so we we you do you tour with jerry a bit and his routine is like uh because i remember you did some with jerry and gaffigan whoa yeah i did one of those shows when they were touring together yeah how was that or a weekend or something yeah what do they have different styles like yeah yeah i've worked with i've opened for i've been on the road with gaffigan too just on his own tour yeah yeah they're both different it's interesting jerry is thinks of the road as like this is enjoyable let's have fun and this is the schedule and we get to do the show and we'll work a little but gaffigan i think thinks of the road like this is where i get i'm i'm working oh interesting so he's like always going over stuff and we get to the venue like way early three four hours early and he works that's his time to work oh really yeah he's in a room listening to sets listening writing and he'll just wander into your room he would just wander and he wouldn't even go just start into a line and then and then i'd go yeah wow turn around and come like start writing again yeah he's he's uh he's amazing cut to us hung over waddling in like i'm at the wrong door oh boy good for gaffigan yeah i pull up right before the show starts same it's impressive yeah yeah yeah um but jerry's like a movie guy on the road right yeah so we go uh we do the show friday and then we go to the next city and then saturday morning have breakfast and then we go to breakfast at nine o'clock and then we go everybody loves hearing this and i love it because it's nine o'clock it's a little it doesn't matter where you are like it's always nine and then um go to breakfast and go to a movie that's pre-planned and then we go to lunch and then we go for a walk what a day that sounds great it's great what's great about it is that um light lifting you your mind's free you don't have to think like what are we doing today you know every going to this thing in this city are we gonna go to this restaurant we just everything you eat breakfast in the hotel or close lunch is just kind of we find a spot the movie's all set up you're just free you know to just hang out i do kind of like shut your brain off tours because like it's rare that we're on someone else's tour at this point but i've done some dates with adam sandler and yeah he's always people are like why is he always in like shorts and basketball shorts because he might hoop at any moment wow a game like so like when you're on tour with him you're just like oh i guess i'm just going to start dressing like adam because so i just i'm wearing basketball shorts and basketball sneakers right because i'm just like oh he might want to play now yeah there's not a lot of so you're like that's why he dresses like that yeah oh interesting i think there is kind of an art you know like all these roles you fill as comedians in this world there is a there is a role that's like i'm on tour with someone and i'm the support act which is more than just what you do on stage totally it's like you know you want to be fun yeah you want to be fun you want to be a hangout and it's like a great guy but i want to be fun it's my tour to make sure everyone's having fun you know yeah yeah man i guess i'm lazy if i'm on tour i'm like i'll see at the show well that's really that's great too that's your thing and depending on who it is yeah yeah yeah i'm like that too i i don't go out that much but well i think with gaffigan he's got five kids so he's probably like i gotta write here i can't really get anything done at home there's school there's activities there's you know dinner and everything i think that might be it too yeah a road movie i feel a little guilty sometimes me too i feel like really i just feel that night i'm like i gotta have something topical so you want to work on i want to i want to have some new bit ideas but uh not just topple maybe some jokes about the town you're in too totally yes i want something but uh yeah but i but jerry's probably been in those towns a million times probably has his jokes yeah yeah i remember i was in oh sorry no i was in bakersfield one night doing like a bar show or like a rock club and they were like oh seinfeld was here last night i was like seinfeld's at bakersfield you know but yeah he's doing it on the road yeah he's running around where he goes everywhere yeah uh that's the road but that's another great thing about having the routine you can do it anywhere so you're like any city that you're in it's the same that's true that's kind of you gotta try to mix it up a little bit because i do have that thing sometimes when i go back to the same city and like i'm doing the exact same thing i was in comfort to that but you're like all right i'm in rochester i'm going to highland park diner again you know i just know where i want to go yeah but then also i'm like i should do other shit i feel like it's bad for your brain repetition to a point is is comforting but to another point you're like yeah i need life experience yeah yeah plus you have that thing for like life is just fleeting it's just i'm back here right years have gone by and i'm just back at the same spot that that bums me out a little bit right yeah the road's interesting the road is like you just gotta adapt to it because that's our life that's it and you gotta figure it out i love the luxury yeah yeah if you don't like the road this is a tough that's true and there's a lot of people that hate the road yeah yeah a lot of people ryan has a line in his act that i've heard where you say like to the crowd you're the first people i've talked to today oh yeah that's like a great comedian road joke right that's like holy shit because that's been me before on the road we were just totally this is crazy it is it was a real thing i just realized like it had been a it was a club i'd been to a bunch of times and i just had this thought like you know i order an uber don't say anything he knows where i'm going yep i i got my boarding pass i don't have to talk to anybody i you know i get in the car i know the club so when i get to the club i walk right to the green room and then it's like there's the audience yeah yeah and you went from zero to 500 or a thousand whatever yeah mike lawrence had that great line where i saw him at an open mic and he goes i had dinner with my parents tonight so this is my second performance of the night and i remember like oh that hits home boy that's good he's so good he has dinner with his parents he's like i get a bit out of this right you know yeah he's he's always working he's always working he's always always moving right yeah i i think about your act sometimes in the road when i'm having like a rough like late show or something like oh i can curse and be like ryan keeps it clean here Well, I just think it's got to be tough to do some of those when you're starting out and they're not there for you and you're doing a late show and they're rowdy and they're drunk. And then you're like, I'm staying clean. I'm staying. Yeah, I got the way that I came up. I did these really rough one nighters and something in me got programmed where it's like if I can do what I want to do and make it work in this room, then I know it's great. Yeah. And so that just helped me. So it's like been that way from the beginning where I still kind of think about that. If I can make what I want to do work here, then that's how I get use out of this show, you know. Right. But I still have it. And it's tough. The late shows have always been tough for me. Really? Getting people there is tough. Sure. You know. What about like a drunk crowd who you can tell are like, talk about pussy. Yeah, it's hard for me, you know, because I'm like. Because the dirty stuff kills, you know. Sometimes I'll talk about my life. That's his life jacket, Fonz. Talk about pussy, dude. He's like, you know that's not the show. Right. But it really, you're talking about these trivial, you know, a lot of my stuff is so trivial and just like, it's, you seem like a nerd, you know, because you're like up there going, like, what's an example? I don't know. Like, I'm talking about getting a haircut, you know. It's like, no, talk about life. Right. We want to be entertained right now. But you do talk about life. Yeah. Yeah. But, you know. I know what you mean. It's, you feel like a, if they're not your fans, especially, and they showed up to the late show, they're like, this is dumb. This is dumb. This is dumb. This is dumb. Not what we, you know. They want an action movie. They want a, yeah. And you're playing, like, my dinner with Andre, you know. But yeah, I know what you mean. I had a set in Irvine, and I do like the family chunk up front. It's like 12 minutes or whatever. And then at the end, a lady goes, talk more about your family. And the whole crowd went, boo. Like, no more family. Wow. Talk about fun stuff. Right. Exciting stuff. Right. Dark shit or whatever. Yeah. So that was eye opening. Wow. Yeah, that's interesting. Yeah. You get, so do you feel, I remember, I was, I ran into Robert Kelly at the Nashville Comedy Festival one time. He's like, how was your show? I was like, great. And he goes, wow, it must be nice to just not have to worry about being dirty all the time or something like that. And I was like, wow, that's interesting that you think of that way. Because I think, you know, we all want to be something we're not. You don't have to talk about your dick, Bobby. You don't. Yeah, yeah. That's true. But I think his audience. These damn handcuffs. But we have to put ourselves in these lanes. At a certain point, you're like, I'm 90% this. Yeah. So, like, that's just how the business works. Like, you're like, that's who I am. That's how I'm marketed. And there's no escaping it, really. But also, you're being you, too. Yeah. That's how you all are just hanging out. Right. It's not really an act. No. Sure. But I just mean the way that people see you and perceive you. Like, if you're 95% something, you just, you got to be 100% something, you know? Right. You know. Yeah. And sometimes when they see you being you, they're like, that's it. That's what he showed up for. Right. That guy. Right. Right. Yeah. But, yeah, I've been doing these shows, and I notice one show is always weak. And I'm like, is that because- Out of what, five or six? Yeah. Out of five. And I'm like, one show is always less than the rest. And I'm like, is that because these are the randos? But then I go, I should be able to make randos laugh. Right. So then I toil with that. But- I just don't think you're going to bat 1,000, I think. Maybe, yeah. You got to- I'm with you. I feel like there's always one weird one, too. Yeah. I mean, sometimes there's two. Yeah. Exactly. I mean, it depends where you're from. It depends where you are. Sometimes it's like, you know, certain cities are more, in your mind, bulletproof. Yeah. Like, yeah, I'm always going to do well in Chicago. But then sometimes you go to Chicago, and you're like, man, that wasn't as good as normally. Yeah. I've had this thing lately where, like, if I'm doing a club Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Thursday's the best. Interesting. I think it's because- I find it always is, too. Yeah. Really? I think it's partly because I'm loose, looser. Out of the gate, you're loose? I'm looser at the end of the weekend. Well, I feel like I'm more real, because I haven't repeated this thing. Oh. Five times. Oh, interesting. But also, don't you think the people that are coming out on a non-weekend night are kind of the most diehard? Yeah. Yeah. They're also maybe a better audience. But I feel like, for whatever reason, like, my material is longer on Thursday than it is on Saturday. Because it's like- Because they're laughing harder. I'm taking more time. Right. And I'm thinking about, and it just comes out more authentically for some reason. Wow. And then by Saturday, I'm dialed. The thing with expectations is, you know, it's difficult. I think you look at weekends, you're like, this is my Saturday. This is my Saturday night. Right. It's like the way people look at New Year's. That's why New Year's sucks. It's the highest of expectations. And weekends, you just have expectations. I mean, you ever go- Yeah. You ever do like a- When I was on the tour bus, I would do like a Monday in Montreal, and I'd be like, holy shit, that crowd was amazing. Right. Right. They came on a Monday. They didn't expect their Monday to be good. Right. Yeah, true. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, maybe you're right. Saturday night's date night. They're a little drunk. They're like putting all their chips on you. Yeah. Well, you addressed it in the opening of your special, where you say, like, some of you don't know who I am, and then the people who brought you are under a lot of pressure right now. Right. And that is the most of those people probably on a weekend, right? That's how my shows always work. It's like there are so many people. They did buy tickets to see me, but they bought them because someone else told them to. Yeah. I love when comics do that. That's a great move. Yeah. Like Shane Gillis has that joke in his special where he goes, I got a bunch of dudes here, and they're girlfriends. And I know they didn't want to see me, but the guy's like, no, no, he's funny. And she's like- And he's like, is he? And he does the whole act out. But he's aware, and I think the women go, he's right. Yeah. Wow, he knows he got us. And now he's got the women. Exactly. It's a good move. Self-awareness is, I mean- Huge. It's huge. I mean, I try to be self-aware when I'm bombing. I let them know, I'm like, okay, I don't want you to think I suck, and I'm not aware. Right. Exactly. And then they go, oh, he's aware. And then that gets a laugh. Yeah. Yeah, I love Seinfeld's thing. The first time I saw it, it blew my mind in telling you for the last time, when he gets in a standing ovation, he goes, I know there's always that one guy I don't want to do it. He's like, oh, we're doing this now? And he has to do a little get up. I love that, because as a kid, I was like, he knows, I don't want to do it. It's also funny that Jerry's brain works as, I can't fully enjoy the standing ovation. Yeah, yeah, that's comedy. You're getting the standing ovation, he's like, something's wrong with this. There's one guy I don't want to do it. It's fun that that's where his mind goes. Right, right. Exactly. It's like Larry David, I feel like it's the same way, where even when something's great, he'll find a way to ruin it. Yeah, completely. And something to me, that's very comedic. Oh, yeah. Somebody will show up with a gift, and he's like, you brought this last year. It's like, I gave you a gift. But it's like, did you see the Larry David thing recently, where apparently he and Obama, in his new show, Obama's in it? No. And he and Obama had like, he was giving Obama notes on something. What? And Obama was trying to give him notes back, and he was like, mm. That's very Larry David to be like. Yes, yes. Because you know what, Obama, you're not a comedian. Yeah. If you're on his show, he is. Right. He's the president. Right. He's the president of this situation. Yeah. Right. Well, he's the best at finding, like that episode where he's at a birthday party, and they're all singing Happy Birthday, and he's like, I don't do the birthday song. And they're like, what? Everybody's like, I don't care for it. So he found a way to make the birthday song a problem. Wow. It's funny. Yeah, what bothers you? Do you have peeves? Oh. Peeves. In the comedy world, or anywhere? Yeah, I was thinking about this in prep. Sure, things bother me. I mean, here's one. that's really like i can't believe i did this i would like so uh feel like an old man but i wrote a huge long uh comment on a new york times article whoa about um helicopter noise i really i hate it oh i hate the helicopter noise i walk around and i look up and i'm like and when you learn about it it's really infuriating because it's like 40 of it is just tourists right most of it's coming from new jersey or a lot of it and and the city has no control because it's all the airspace all controlled federally by the faa so we can't limit it and so and and the complaints to 311 have gone like 2 000 times really insane amounts and numbers of complaints and the city shut down two of the heads of the city and they're like oh my god we're gonna have to do this again and they're like we're gonna have to do this again and they're like oh my god we're gonna have to do this again and they're like oh my god we're gonna have to do this again and they're like oh my god we're gonna have to do this again and they're like oh my god we're gonna have to do this again for tourists but they have one and they've limited the hours but you can't control what new jersey does so right you get these helicopters constantly up and down the hudson they just sit over central park while you're trying to enjoy central park and they're just tourists looking out it's just like tourists it's like 15 people who got ripped off in new jersey all right they drove all the and i've heard these horror stories they drive out to new jersey and they go well if you want to see the park it's actually this much more and they already bought like a ticket and they went all you know somebody somebody hit him up in times square or something oh it's like and then the whole city's like looking up for these six people so this helicopter company could make a hundred bucks off each one of them or something right that's a great piece it's like annoying it also freaks me out a little bit because you do they do crash all the time it's like yeah they could one of these companies one of the new jersey companies they were the one that had a crash in 2018 and five people died oh my god yeah yeah yeah yeah in the hudson river that guy oliver tree just died that was a helicopter awful crazy yeah so there was this article about electric uh air taxis and how the federal government wants to uh you know get them going and get the and so i thought and that's what i wrote this this comment like if you really want to get these the innovation of these air taxis gone because it's supposed that they're much quieter get rid of the regulation or regulate the helicopter what a specific peeve very good peeve very specific peeve i just i walk it's every day i'm like i look up at them and it's just once you notice it it's almost like i don't want to tell people about it yeah because once it's in your life you're like you hate it it's like a buzzing gnat and covet i heard them all the time that's when it really became crazy because every Everybody was at home, and I started to notice how awful these were. Right. Interesting. You ever ridden one? Yeah. I've been in a helicopter in Hawaii once. Ooh. Like one of those tours that I hate. Yeah. You were the guy. What were you doing in one? I was opening for Schumer. That's what I took one. Yeah, we took it from New York to Philly. Oh, cool. We got there quickly. It works. You get it. Yeah, we did L.A. to San Diego. Wow. Yeah. It's weird because the train in L.A. to San Diego is so easy, too. Same with Philly, but I guess when time's that important to you. I have a theory, because I've known her for years, that sometimes she would be late, so we'd have to take a crazy vehicle. Oh, intentionally? Yeah, I don't even know if she knew it, but she was like, oh, I'm running behind. Guess we'll have to take a PJ. Oh, guess we'll have to take an elevator. That's a helicopter. That's like the taxi for most people. I know. You're like, yeah, helicopter. That's true, yeah. I mean, most of the traffic is the tourist traffic that really drives me bonkers. But here's a more relatable one. Okay, okay. That was a good one. Interesting. I think the way people treat bags in the overhead on the plane drives me crazy. They won't stand them upright if they do that, or they'll take up too much space, or they'll keep their bag with them. And I've been thinking, so many people I've seen say, if you return your grocery cart, you're a really good person. Yes. Okay. But I think a better test is what you do with your bag on the airplane, because that really is affecting all the people around you. Right. The grocery cart is just, you know, they're paying a kid to do it. You're just helping the business. That's it. Yeah. It's like being courteous. But the bag thing, if you take up all the space in there, someone else has to check their bag. Not only that, how about the double bagger? And the double, they sneak it in. Drives me crazy. Yeah. Yeah. So you're saying, flip it up like a book, and don't lay it flat. Well, it says right there. Some of them don't flip on the tiny planes that don't work that way, but I'm with you. If it fits, you got to flip it. Yeah. And it says right there. And they say a hundred times, put it like a book. And everybody just throws three bags up there and sits down. Like, to me, they're like, I have no awareness of anybody else. I'm not even worried about that. Yeah. And maybe it's because we're on planes so much that, like, you know, it's easier for us to think about it. But that's one. That's a good one. Yeah. I don't understand these people. My wife will do the thing where she's, like, shoves her purse down in the seat. I'm like, man, I want that leg room. I don't know how you live like this. Oh, if you have a second bag, you got to do it. I guess you got to do it, but, like, I would throw it up there. If there's space, throw it up there. But she'll put it down by the feet. If there's space. Yeah, yeah. I do this thing where I put my, after we take off, I put it behind my legs. Oh, that's better. And then you got the, you can do that. That's better. You got to take off with it down there. Right, right, right. I wrote a peep down. I got a peep going. You got a peep? I got a peep. I got a peep. All right. Soft blueberries. Oh, the rotten ones. Oh, my God. Well, sometimes you get, well, sometimes you have to buy them with the tape on, so you can't test them. Yes. So I'm all excited to eat these blueberries. It's the summer. It's a refreshing little thing. Someone's like to throw it in my yogurt. Yeah. You want to get the day. Yeah. Soft. And I bought two packs. So it was all the same. It's a huge difference. You bite into a crisp blueberry, it explodes in your mouth. Yes. It's so much better. Love it. Love a snap. Yeah, so a toast to the fresh blueberries. Oh, yeah. And a big fuck you to the soft ones. I mean, I was devastated. I'm with you. My kid eats blueberries, so I'm buying them all day long, and I pop a few in. When you get that mushy one, ugh, it's a bummer. My sister, this is like a joke in our family. When she was really young, my mom would buy grapes, and my sister would go, did you get the tight grapes? Tight grapes. You need tight. Same with grapes. Yeah, this peep goes for grapes. I mean, if it's a thing you can't test, that's the thing, right? Yeah, right. Don't worry, you're taking their word for it. Right. Yeah. Interesting. We sound like women. Soft. Sucks. How about this guy? This is specific. All right. I get the guy who tells me I'm slipping when he thought of something that I wouldn't even have thought of. Okay, here's an example. I do a lot of puns as a goof, and I'll be like, oh, this guy spayed his cat. And the other guy goes, David Spade. Come on, man, you're slipping. Come on, you missed that one. I'm like, I don't even like that. I don't even like that one. This is definitely about Salicu's, by the way. No, no. I guess he's probably done it. But I don't like a guy telling me I'm slipping when he thought of something that I didn't even think was that good. It's the guy who's trying to be funny because he's in front of a comedian. Right. And then he's like, I got you. Yeah, yeah. Come on. I'm slipping? That sucked. That's terrible. Yeah. You're slipping. Yeah. Don't tell me I'm slipping. You're slipping. Yeah. You forced the David Spade thing in there. Yeah. That wasn't natural? No, completely. Yeah. But now all of a sudden, I'm slipping. It's not lacking because he came up with something. Right. That annoys me. That's a good one. He's very specific. I hate plastic water bottles. And I don't know why we. I hate plastic. You can right there. Yeah. The can is the answer. Why do we have to have the plastic water bottle? Everywhere we go, someone hands you a plastic water bottle. They taste bad. All the microplastic stuff. Who knows what's going on? Very bad for you. Is it? Yeah. They say a lot of testosterone is lower and all this stuff is lower. We're learning a lot about it. We don't know a lot. But it's like, why do we have to deal with it everywhere? And then the aluminum is much better recycled. It's infinitely recyclable. You can turn a can into another can. When you recycle a bottle, it gets downgraded. That's why you get clothing made out of plastic bottles. They can't make another bottle out of a bottle. Oh. I didn't know that. Yeah. I just learned that because I had to come up with pet peeves for this. But the can is pretty new for water. Yeah. That's pretty recent. Like, we've had cans around forever. I think it's a superior way. You can't cap the can. True. But you've got to drink it all in one spot. And the glass bottle stresses me out a little bit. You drop it, but you're stepping on glass. Right. And apparently, there's just as much plastic in glass because of the lid. Whoa. I learned that, too. Eh, we're going to die. It's going to end anyway. You don't want to be that queef with the fucking jug. You know, he's got the metal jug on his belt. Oh, yeah, yeah. Or the backpack. Or the person with the bottle that's big. I know they say stay hydrated. But this is a situation here. You're going to be peeing all day. Yeah. Right, right. Get a canteen at this point. I'm already peeing nonstop. Between the water and the coffee. I can't do it. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know. I'm with you. All right. Well, hey, watch Ryan's special. It just hit me on Netflix. It's out there, baby. This just hit me. Ryan Hamilton. Look at that. The eyes are popping. The hair has got a nice gel in it. The suit looks great. It looks sharp. Thank you. The watch is peeking out. Oh, great. Thank you. Love it. Love it. It's really funny. It's a true story. It's personal. It's clean. It's great. Thank you. And there's a lot of other stuff in there. Yeah, it's great. Go see Ryan on tour, Ryan. Where are you going to be? Oh, man. I got a bunch of dates coming up. I don't know. Des Moines. Yeah. Cincinnati. I don't even know. But we're announcing a big tour in a couple weeks. I don't know when this is dropping, but I'll have a lot more theater dates in the fall and next year. So look at that. RyanHamiltonLive.com. Yeah. Are you feeling a bump? Did you feel like, oh, okay, people are hitting me up. People are watching. Am I? Yeah, I'm getting, you know, I'm getting nice things online. I don't know if it's translating. I think it will. We'll see. It's hard to tell. I don't know. The road will tell when those shows sell out and all that. We'll see. We'll see what happens. I got a Bray Improv just added August 21st through 23rd. Then we're hitting Europe, Lisbon, Athens, Budapest, Zagreb, Vienna, Warsaw added a show there, Helsinki, Sweden. We're going to do Stockholm and Copenhagen. I'm going to add a bunch more dates coming soon, so please check punchup.live/samorelle/tours/shows. I don't know. Just go to the Punch Up. Give it a go. Are you bringing anybody? Just a friend. We're just going to hang out. Oh, okay. Yeah. Nice. All right. All right. Seattle. Emerald City. I heard it's a great club. I've never been. Tampa, baby. Sidesplitters. Cobb's Comedy Club. Love San Fran. Seattle. I've never been. Tampa, baby. Sidesplitters. Cobb's Comedy Club. Love San Fran. Love San Fran. Love San Fran. Love San Fran. Sidesplitters. Cobb's Comedy Club. Travel the worlds of Netflix IRL. Inspired by fan favorites like Stranger Things and Squid Game. Brave the upside down. Face off with the front man. Play leveled up arcade games. Shop exclusive merch. And enjoy themed food and drinks. Beat the heat. Play, eat, and shop on repeat at Netflix House at Galleria Dallas. Bring your crew and save. Get your tickets today at netflix.com slash house.