Roxana Baldovin: Directing Globally, Project Greenlight, and Music Videos

[Music] You are now listening to Fenmer Guard podcast with Tessa Markle and Carolina Alparez. Mmm, fam. Hey fam fam, welcome back to another episode on the Fenmer Guard podcast. We so appreciate you guys as our listenership and as always if you rate our podcast and subscribe to it that really helps our show and helps us you know. No you guys listen to this shit. I was like why am I not gonna curse this but no it really does help us know who's out there and you know any reviews you know it's it's always great to hear back feedback and we're just excited to bring another guest on today whom I met at the UCSB Women in Media Conference. I'm just trying to get all the ladies who are on the panel with me on the show because they were so well spoken. Yeah. Each have their own like super power. Let's call it that you know and today we have a music director queen Roxanne and Baldwin on the show who you know that was that has been her bread and butter. She's worked with legendary celebrities like Doja Cat with Calipa, Snoop Dogg, a lot of legatona artists that we get into my arson not well that was not really in the morning. I got a warm up and she's Maluma. Oh for Le Mandering. There's just some she's she's just worked with such amazing high-profile celebrity artists and we get to kind of hear the T.O. music videos which we haven't gone into in such a long time and so it was really cool to hear that landscape and the differences between music video work and commercial work which she's also done and she's now very focused on narrative works and even stepping in as an actress. So Signora de Rectora, she goes by on Instagram. She's like feeling a relaunch because as a lot of us on the show we do more than one thing right so it's uh we're very excited for her and I think you guys will have a lot of fun listening to this. We also step into some reality TV as she was on HBO's Project Greenlight you know pitching to Queens like Israe. So we give it to so much and she's just was so fun to talk to. Yeah and I love that she you know sometimes you see people go through the career changes like doing different mediums of its music videos, commercials, narrative, whatever and it's kind of like you know they're stepping stones like they start with this and then they move into this but I love that she's still embracing all of it. She's still doing all of it you know and she's just breaking into these different areas to I don't want to say just try them out that sounds like it's blooping like but she's getting to try all of these different things and getting to still experience all the cool successes with all of them so I love that and I think this is also a really great episode that talks about like really using your own creativity to be unique you know whether it's coming from your own life story and experiences and background and culture or just some really cool creative ideas that you shouldn't be afraid to just step outside of the box because that's what's really gonna make you stand out and make you unique and chances are people are gonna eat a relate they're gonna really love it and be surprised by it and all of the good things so like don't be afraid to step outside the box and be creative. Yes so would that fan enjoy the show? Roxy what's up you're in Poland right now that's so crazy. Poland yes my mom's here so spending so it's so crazy you're with your mom right now the familiar um we love it all this mom. Apparently it always finds the Polish people I love it so funny. I know it's actually really crazy how we connected on that because I was not usually if someone says they're Polish they don't speak Polish so I was like oh my god okay my idea of China let's go. We should tell the story actually on the putt how we met it was it was really like that connection was so amazing to have in the moment which we had it um we were fam we were at the women in media UCSB Supreme Conference this is another guest from the conference we just had a haveland on um and I I was up there telling everyone about my latest projects and how I like to use like my cultural backgrounds into my films and projects and with sync as some of you might know my actual Polish mother her she plays my mom in the film and so you hear us having Polish conversations shout out to Sophia um Bojena but Sophia and so okay. Everyone's like that's so Latina but like yeah she made herself more Latina in the US yeah yeah Bojena is like and my boyfriend actually for the first time last night found out that was her actual first name. I guess Coziana doesn't really have a translation in English right so she just like no like what would it be Barbara? No, I think there is a Barbara there's Basha. Basha. I think it's Barbara. I think so. I love the Basha's the Caches and I know so much. I know so many so many guys. But yeah I was mentioning that on the stand and and I was like yes it would speak Polish in the film and Roxy just like just shouts it out like stop and I forgot what you said in Polish to me. I think that you just let me call it go that you speak Polish like I was like what? Yeah and then I was just like yep and we just started talking on the stand and it was hilarious because I agree like I don't think you meet many who speak black actual language and have a straight up Polish mom like growing up in that household is really fun and and I just think it's like why she was such a fun character to like bring it on to the film because I don't know like it wasn't so much of statement of like being Polish but coming from my and this is so funny because my character is from Brooklyn and you are from Brooklyn. Yes but that is a community that's there and a lot of first generation Americans are there so I think that's actually a like nice little segue I think to you know speaking on your cultural background because you're not only Polish and and you are Brooklyn based so like let's get into that what's your little melting pot. Yeah so um that's the key. I grew up in Brighton Beach which I didn't even realize in Brighton Beach that it's like very famous to anyone who's from like the former Soviet Union because basically like um I mean my mom came in 1968 she was like 16 but the biggest immigration came in like 1991 around like 89 to 93 of like after the Soviet Union crashed and it's like all my friends growing up were like Georgia, Kazakhstan or maybe like Ukraine whatever like from different parts of the Soviet Union for Soviet Union and it was like my mom was born in Ukraine so my grandmother would speak to me in Russian but then my mom was cold as she grew up in Poland because she was Poland when she was five and so she was more Polish and then my dad was an Italian American like super Brooklyn Italian like exactly what you see in the movies with the accent and everything and so it was like for like the kids in my neighborhood I was like too Polish I wasn't really fully Russian because I was more Polish but then like um or like American right and then I went to high school in like you know more like in Park Slob another part of Brooklyn that's more like you know where the hipster is live and everybody there was American so to them I was like the trashy Russian girl like you know from like you know they wouldn't even like know my neighborhood correctly because it was like there was Bay Ridge there was sheep said Bay and I'm like no I'm not from Bay Ridge and from sheep said Bay thank you um see as I definitely grew up like a very like even though both my parents were European it still felt like a very mixed household because like my mom was Jewish right that was Protestant um so I never really felt like fully like I belonged in one and then like within my mom's own cultural background she still was mixed you know it was very much like a hodgepodge of things so yeah um and then you know growing up in New York everybody's a first generation something um so you know I had a lot of Latino friends like from Puerto Rico and to make her public um like grew up listening to a lot of Degaton and then I don't know like I guess in college I kind of like forgot about it whatever um and then after college like you know bad bunny started coming out and I was like oh my god there was music that I used to love so much um and yeah I um started spending a lot more time in Puerto Rico and DR like I was like working on a lot of videos um in like you know the American space then and then I was like I really want to work with these people over there and so I kind of like start from the bottom again you know like $5,000 music videos again just to like like it was like so cool for me to like work with this guy Kimiko in DR he's like a local Dominican rapper but like I mean and in the art when we were shooting our video like everybody on the streets like taking photos like he's not necessarily known like outside of the scene um yeah and I was on it before everybody helped on it you know and then like and then you know Colin Tilly started doing the videos for the Latinos and it just like blew up into this global phenomenon but yeah I spent all the time Puerto Rico I bought a house there a couple years ago so yeah so you were doing well that's that's incredible that you went from you know a space where you really felt comfortable but you wanted to push yourself outside of that into something that actually like really called to you it felt like in the music and I just want to back it up because I feel like you did the did you do the jump outs like after college yeah yeah of course so I was definitely not directing I mean now I started directing I guess my senior year of college I did a company called statewide and then you know I did some music videos um but yeah now I would say this was when I was 27 and my Saturn return is when I uh there we go wait I'm a Caribbean baby I need to go to work with you and it was like crazy because I remember um my first time flying to dr to do a video um I was still not like a hundred percent confident in my Spanish and dr is not like like first of all Dominican Spanish is like a whole other bowl of soup because like they cut the um you know they like I love the way it sounds like they cut like all their the ends of their words and like their metaphors are so beautiful you know and but I was scared because I was like you know in Puerto Rico I was able like everyone speaks English in Puerto Rico in Puerto Rico like it's just it's America you know but you are like nobody's spoke English so like I was like directing like I you know I have to like comment like I had just like half a confidence like directly in Spanish like you know who gives a fuck about your accent because you're only gonna get better at speaking a language if you practice it you know when that's a percent yeah like yeah and so it would get to a point where like some of my friends that were a Puerto Rican and Dominican by um blood like they'd be like like they would be less confident in their Spanish than me or like I would like you teaching them words and I'm just like you just have to try because I beg you could do it you know like don't like you can't care about like if they're gonna think you're a good anger or whatever like just speak your truth with and that's how I got my name to senior I didn't thought out because on NDR they had never really seen a female director for so senior I see yeah and I will get stopped on the street on the islands and a big senior I love that how did you learn Spanish then like probably I learned it in high school I'm from like seven great to like college I took it that's like a basic understanding but I don't really feel like that's like knowing Spanish you know yeah well there yeah yeah you know what I mean like is we like immerse yourself in a culture and I was like listening to alifoca like the Dominican radio show it's like the Dominican breakfast club probably just listen to it and like obviously you know like reading the lyrics of like a bad bunny song um some boys sprinkled in between always have all the great ways to learn yes and I didn't kind of recommend so I don't doubt there and really like you know being the only female director these people have ever seen like that kind of really blossomed your career um but you would mention that you are already directing music videos before then too like how did you even start there now I was doing doja cat and was califa and calani and like all these a-listers in america and I was like I want to be on an island speaking Spanish and like sent this you know doing that I get along because of the music of my soul yeah but yeah now hop um no that's in it but that's an outstanding career to have to work with such high alice liberties here what got you what got your first steps into music videos and and getting to work with those liberties was it you know doing a bunch of spec music videos was working with other artists um you know talk a little bit to that for anyone who's looking to break in to the music video in the story I think that if you have anyone like in your um immediate circle or not even necessarily immediate circle but if you because now it's social media it's like so much more attainable you know like you find an artist that you like that has like 10,000 followers chances are if you DM them they'll see it you know and yeah music video um their first video only had like 10,000 views and then the video I did for them their second video ended up getting 12 million views and then I worked with them um a lot uh in my early career like I worked with a few local Brooklyn artists uh phony people and learned her sheers primarily um phony people is like every artist's favorite artist you know they're like chance the rapper loves them like you know mad people I've ever I'm like always like call you cheese like they were on tour of princess no key I like I don't like you look I love college yeah yeah yeah so um yeah they're like more like R&B and like they're like a live band like six of them um and then under a t-berg of rappers so I was working with both of them and then we had a video it's so crazy because like in the beginning of your career when like you really have to scrap for everything I feel like you're so creative and so we shot a video in Washington Square Park um I had like five PAs that were just like standing like making sure that people like know the park was locked we had like a hundred extras and um you know there were fans of them because they had had a following at this point like a a cult following they were like the first rappers to do like third eye rap you know and uh so yeah one of the girls that came out she was an internet-atlantic records and so she was like hey I would love to show your stuff to my boss but that process from like her showing her stuff to her boss and then me actually getting a video from her boss was still a year and a half um and the first video that we did with them was um little hussie bird pees and pews but like I remember the first time they uh that uh she sent um a stolly music video for ten thousand dollars I was like oh my god I made it like it's just it's culture remember those wins you know yeah absolutely that's the thing you always got to remember where you came from and still celebrate those you know even if it's like you get to a point where that feels small like that's huge for somebody's just starting out you know it's the always have to like remember that we're all came from also it's like there was like a not only a shitson of rejection in that year and a half because like first of all she was our only contact contact like now obviously I know like a million commissioners um but at the time that was like my only like for reigned oh my god like you know and honestly I wouldn't have a career without her um manny she works a capital now um if you listen to the net if you ever saw the young thug nass car video um there's a voice note in it where uh huh young thug is like and then manny was like and that's the manny she actually sent us that um boy note to write the music video for that song and then video came out I was so happy that I didn't do it because I don't know if you guys saw it it's a great video it's one of my favorites um even sing it uh basically uh thug never showed up on set but the but the director still like created a video out of him oh my god oh my god what I was in my career at that time I don't think I would have been able to pull off what he did you know like sick video of like like he's just really going behind the scenes of everything so yeah oh that's crazy oh my god I would have been like mortified like wait what do you mean that the music video that artist I'm making for they're not unsat we put it we figure it out but instead like that's like you said like for someone you wants to actually do it the normal like human the artist is that for their first time for sure sure the guy that did it um yeah he was definitely a few years older and like in the game for longer and able to handle that whereas that was like me still like chicken without a head like where do I love you know but yeah so in that year and a half um she's probably I don't know how many brief she sent like I wrote on so much so many things that I didn't get and separate of that also like every time I would do something new I would send it to her too so like I always remember um you know to keep people informed on what you're doing because like I want to ask you about that there's so many directors like you think you're special but like they'll replace you like that you know so just be annoying be in their ear like hey the worst they could do is not respond you know well that's what I wanted to ask you because I feel like this is such great advice for anyone who's trying to still grow the even if you have some experience like just still even leveling it up you kind of have to still find you know network and do this kind of connecting and updating so in that you're gonna have to be a little more micro with it like were you just sending her updates and would she respond to all of them would she not respond like what kept you going because I know me like that's really hard for me sometimes when I'm like okay they respond like I guess I'm gonna move on like I don't want to bother them you know what was that line for you all the time it was like 2015 to 2016 but I think um that she was like I was definitely I was on Craigslist all the time so I was like getting all these like little fashion gigs off of Craigslist like little videos like I don't know like you know be little BTS like a random commercial whatever um and also doing local stuff for artists but like more um investing then really making anything off it just like enhancing your your resume as you do when you're younger um but yeah I feel like she would respond and then like send briefs we just wouldn't get them I don't know I was relentless I was like there's no way I'm working on fucking office my part so I was like no way that's gonna happen is if I'm doing this but I was also like um yeah I had a really tight relationship with with that uh thunder cheaters those rappers and so I continued like making videos for them and I think that you know just being like in the local Brooklyn scene but honestly um when I moved to LA was when things started to really pop off because at that time I was still like living at home not paying rent you know like more flexible but then when I when I moved to LA it was crazy was like within a month or so that she gave us like seven videos in a row oh wow and I like that did wow damn that was like one within the span of a month I did or like six weeks I did Uzi Kalani loopy fiasco five videos for Tray songs P&B rock Gucci main and I was all like within you know that's huge oh my god well obviously she like grew a lot of respect for you and like the thing the work you were doing to just like that shows that she was like I have the confidence in you entirely like here you go like it wasn't like here's one project like let's see how this goes kind of thing you know so that's a that is a testament to your hustle and kind of how you showed yourself that professionally which is fucking phenomenal um what what goes into I know nothing use a video why it's like you do you're saying you do briefs like how it's it feels like is it like making a mini short film that's how I I think of it so you might explain the process a little bit like I like have made a note that I did one short and I didn't even write it um which I mean obviously they'll do short so they don't write but I didn't really have control in the short I did because I was like I'm not gonna put money into this if they're not if it's writer and like producers not really gonna put anything into this like Jesus take the wheel um which is what I said I'm like gonna be very specific about what I shoot that I don't write if it's narrative to you know um anyways I digress um yeah so music videos are like the wild wild west I don't know if you've ever heard that analogy for music videos but like there's really no rules whatsoever there's no um like there's not spoken things obviously but like things can change for so many reasons like you really have to be like the most adaptable person in the world to work in music videos because um yeah so like you know sometimes they'll send you a song and they'll be like okay we have $50,000 and the shoot is in New York and they want to make it Barbie themed and everything has to be pink and this is the brief and they give you a page of things that the artist already wants that's okay and sometimes it'll happen and the artist will get 10 briefs of pink Barbie and then the video that comes out is about spaceships because they probably get so like think of all the Barbie video of Barbie things right away I just want this analogy but I do have a rep a video like similar of like what they wanted versus what they got was like okay well that wasn't really oh wow um but uh or sometimes I'll just like the brief is open you could do whatever you want and you have $80,000 but it shoots next week you know so they can do that sometimes or or they can feel like you know 250 um they really wanted to be stylish and edgy that's it stylish and edgy it's like so across the board like everything is like project to project where it's like you never know like you really don't know where it's gonna land and also it's like a lot of discernment too because like like at some times they'll send you a brief where they know what they want and then in the end the artist goes left anyways and it's like actually my creative director is gonna shoot it and we're gonna do it on my mom's basement or they just don't show up yeah or like you know like I did I you know sometimes like you'll be on like twice actually in my career I like have face sense with the artist you think you're doing the video you're talking about the brief and they fuck with you right one time the the song came out and the label decided they didn't want to put money into that song anymore so they never did a video and then the other time yeah the songs didn't perform as well as they wanted to they also didn't put money into the video so it's like I think it's still in films that like our other love financing what's like you don't really know like the deal's not done until the deal's done right you know but it sounds even more crazy of course because then I'll do something and then it doesn't come out either but that's also like happens in commercials I don't know I did this commercial I was really excited about last year thought it was amazing best thing I ever shot like so different from anything I ever did but it was to even though it was their concept because in commercials do you do commercials ever no no we have it okay at least for the production side okay commercials are also different because commercials are very streamlined they will always trick like more or less you'll always it'll always be three people that write on it you know whereas like in a music video it could be 20 people you don't know so it's always three people that they're talking to and you know the schedule is the schedule if they say September 25th you're shooting in September 16th you're flying in like that's gonna be the date whereas in music videos the date is bullshit every time you see a date it's so rare um but yeah I did a commercial last year and you know so with commercials like you're kind of just directing what they're already telling you you know like you don't really it's weird like their commercials are a lot are a lot easier in terms of like you know you're not really comfortable you're just kind of taking their idea and looking up we're not developing more than what's already like getting more money for a way yeah really not as much work but a lot more like busy work and housekeeping that is like necessary you know you'll sit in like 10 30-minute meetings you know um but you know uh anyways yeah I did this commercial and um yeah the brand was like oh this is uh the still too crazy for us so we don't know it was Barbara cigarettes and so Barbara too edgy were you too edgy it was so cool man and like I don't know like I mean I don't care if you use this I guess it was such a cool commercial it was called symphony of flavor and so it was like they literally let me make a crop circle in the middle of the tobacco farm yeah we had like a bunch of musicians like crafting a song and while the musician was crafting the song we were also telling the story of like the tobacco leaves and the way the farmers blend the tobacco leaves and it was like right after Oppenheimer came out so like I was doing all these like beautiful macros shots of leaves and like oh that footage was to die for but I don't have it on my vast fortitude hunt they said they might do something with it but it won't be that so they too of course that's how I was just thinking what they went with too if that was like too crazy I know that sounds like gorgeous and cool like so with cigarette stuff it can only live on their website but apparently Marrow has four billion monthly viewers like a really loyal fan base but I think their fan base is all like 65 year old taboos you know what I mean so yeah that tracks me that's a little woe for them you know like electronic music whoa you know they just needed like a farmer just like going through the field you know and then a tractor and call it a day oh my gosh well that's that it thanks for breaking down like the differences because it is so different you know going from something that's more structured and outlined and you're kind of just like working with something that's very been it's been prepped so well for you almost then then like the music video and to yeah I didn't know it was such a such a jungle I would be like oh no like we are we're doing this I planned to and of course like well the thing with music videos though too is that like if you write something in the brief I mean if you write something in a treatment more often than not it's gonna happen you know what I mean I'm like I do I prefer music videos in a creative way I prefer music videos more the commercials because a lot of times it is my idea and I get to like build the world and the artist will just go with it whereas like in the car show it's like you know they hire you for your like it was really a learning curve for me to start doing commercial because like they hire you for your creative but then you like start talking about it and they're like no way that doesn't go with the brand guidelines at all you don't get to edit your own commercial either oh yeah rare so yeah I think it's really so weird yeah writing your own content and doing that that's the vibes I think yeah yeah commercial world is so weird I've only been like in that world as an actor but even that it's like they'll tell you you know we want you to be natural and this and that and not selling and then they you see the commercial come out that you didn't book and they're like welcome to blah blah and it's like really right why didn't you even bother to tell me this or it's gonna be the same as everything else like it's just yeah it's a weird world to be in but it doesn't yeah it doesn't always feel like you get to be creative with it so I'm glad that you get to have that in the music video world and as well as like the narrative world because you've done a bit of that as well right or you know I'm exactly but I've definitely been writing since I look like you know a kid um and uh but no I haven't actually like I'm starting to produce my own stuff now um and I'm like very determined to do that now because I feel like I yeah you know you just time goes by and then like you're like oh I'm gonna wait to get finance or like oh I don't want to put my own money into this or like you know you like and then you're like oh shit wait I wrote that three years ago so this year I'm very much more focused on putting out my original stories because I feel like I have a lot more to say than what I've been doing before you know like that's just yeah like yeah doing music videos is fun and it's pretty and it's cool um but how much can you really say when you're like talking through someone else you know so yeah no for sure and like props to anyone who just wants to stay in that lane but this is a filmmaker podcast so chances are you want to tell your own stories and like that could be a great way to develop skills and connections and all of that make money and then like oh yeah now you're like you've hit you're kind of glass ceiling with it where you're like I can't I I want to do more I want to say more with your own words yeah and maybe I'll get thrown in there but you know you know you can add that you can add that of course well I do want to highlight that you've been recently a part of HBO's project green light emerging as one of the nine women selected out of a full of six thousand hello um to have a million dollar movie pitch uh to luminaries like he's a ray and uh just so many amazing people like what what what is that what was that experience then and my friend Johnny Hernandez he's also a producer he destruction of his cult classic um he apparently sent that to me and like like the um you know the flyer like all their casting or whatever apparently he sends that to me in like six other email directors and I was the only one that actually applied which is like crazy um yeah but yeah I was like the only music video director on it um okay there was one other girl that like you know had done music videos like that wasn't like her bread and butter you know right was so yeah that was cool to me that I was like the token music video director girl you know yeah well yeah it was a crazy experience being on reality TV's insane because like I don't know if you guys walk the jinks with Robert Durst yes you know it just watched it actually like last week okay so you know how the last scene of the first season he's in the bathroom and the mic is on and he goes I killed those people of course I killed them so I went to the bathroom when I was doing project Greenland they're like oh you can't take that off and I was like oh my god so that is real like how Robert Durst out called you can't take your mic off you are in the bathroom so we were locked to know who we're at the Universal Studios Charitant in three days um with the mics on for the whole three days and we shot two scenes that were deleted of me like I was the only director with a glam squad like I like made my hair my best friends and stylist and my makeup artist I mean one of my best friends is a makeup artist and she happens to do my makeup when I want it but you know um but I like yeah and it was during COVID so they were like oh they need to get a COVID test and like that's fine we're making it happen no way I'm gonna be on on TV without getting glam without so yeah just like they told me doing this way I'm like they're could have been like I'm dead I wish that I'd negotiated my contract to like get the footage but like you kind of have I mean at least like I don't know like at the time it was like scarcity mindset of like oh my god if I ask for too many things are they gonna replace me like oh no no I want to make it all it's all the contract so yeah yeah we're ladies and just ask for more always since yeah the worst they could do is say no because another girl on the show I mean she didn't ask for that she asked for like the rights to her film or something um they gave it her so definitely get her to ask that's actually an even more intimidating answer sometimes like question is like can I just please have the rights can't we read and like you're always like I don't know they purposely like kind don't want you to have it so it's a weird question but amazing lifelong friends from that show like um you know other directors uh women directors uh so that's amazing um and yeah I mean it was like kind of a shitty time because it came out like during the strike so they couldn't really like promote it or anything but the experience itself was like so cool and also like even directing so this is they gave us $5,000 to direct a scene oh yeah and you know I got all in credit from mid 90s to be in it I like saw him at a party and I was like do you want to be on this HBO thing but doing um creating that I put some Spanish in it actually you know like I because if we weren't allowed to change any of the words in the script but I don't know because I was like okay but can we translate them and they're like you know and so like I had like Latin music in the background like I made the and that was cool to do um but yeah doing that experience like definitely just only more solidified like oh my god I want to do narrative stuff more you know that's amazing taking like the skill set that I feel like I learned the most from directing music videos and commercials is like the importance of production design and styling and like just like building a world like I'm really interested just like building a world that is not like our own world you know and so yeah I saw myself doing that in the HBO thing too like in its own way but it was like the styling that I had and like the lighting I had was because it was like a CD neighborhood she was like a CD neighbor and so like I made it like cyber punky kind of and like a little you know dark and dystopian so yeah we love that shout out to Sikh right no we we love like genre film and world building like that so I totally get it it's a really fun place as a creative to like that's I think that's the joy for me is like coming up with your own creation and concept is that's it's the part of enjoying movies it's like the world we can relate to but it's heightened in a way to tell a mess it could be a singular message it could be an emotion whatever it is that you want to say as a director but that's like I feel like one of the most fun things about telling a story is is the world building as I absolutely yeah and getting creative with it really makes you stand out too you know like even when you said about like can't change the words but you translated them instead like I'm sure you're the only one that did that that makes you stand out you know oh it was the only one that did that so that was cool um and yeah I don't know you guys should check out the the episode on HBO uh okay yeah yeah really it's just like my popcorn tonight you like yeah it was like um it was crazy because it was also like have you ever pitched a movie to a studio before not you guys don't know how is this crazy because it's like it was my first time ever pitching a movie and like doing it to them and on camera like I definitely blacked out but like the only thing that I didn't do I had all these notes and the only thing that I didn't do was like talk about like oh it's gonna be like the matrix in the scene in natural warm killers with broadening danger building I didn't say any of my references and I mean not that it would have changed the outcome everything I was for a reason but it's just like that was like the only part that I glossed over because I was like everybody's gonna say the matrix cut to nobody's hit the matrix you know what I mean yeah yeah that like your ideas are your own um like I like saw that I saw the edit in my head which was like self-sabotaging in a way and the edit I saw my head was like the matrix the matrix the matrix the matrix no one yeah no one you were like this is so obvious like it has to be the matrix yeah like I saw a lot I really saw a lot of visual references that I didn't really discuss and like even in like in the edit of it it just like seems like I'm just like I'm gonna be the best which is like you know we were I was in there for 30 minutes and it's like a minute that they cut so also like right right right I was talking about things that was just like the characters they made me out to be but I can so see that this girl with glam and she's like I'm gonna be the best I need to launch this absolutely because yeah you are obviously so talented and had all these ideas but like reality TV they got to have a character for you yeah I'd be like the girl who only wants to talk about bagels and pizza because I once lived in New York and New Jersey so you know that's what would be because I was on the wheel of fortunes so that's that'd be a few more days did you win anyone I won a couple grand yeah I like that way it was the worst experience when was that during the pandemic that's cool yeah I mean if you're in LA it's really not that hard to get on any of those shows to be you and pop up all over your culture jeopardy team they're doing it you uh with jeopardy that's pop culture you want to be my team player sure I would do it I will literally send you the code because you have to apply as a team of three and like I did I get a house I don't have a third person so I did what it was actually harder than I thought it would be to be fair and that's the thing it was really hard it was not easy it was very stressful it was not like a day on set which for me is like it's stressed but it's like I'm there and I get it it's my world I'm comfortable TV like that and they're telling you to spend this heavy ass wheel and Dylan be happy be excited and you're like where's Tequila right now this is so but you know I it was fun at the end of the day I'm really glad I did it and it was just inexperience but I was on a court TV show so those aren't real I'm done that too oh really which was really I was on uh America's part with Judge Ross and my character was suing the other character for like defamation wherever like basically being embarrassed because over a vibrator so I was on morning TV talking about a vibrator in court I did not know this oh yeah that is crazy mine was I was the best friend of a girl that was like in a domestic violence situation and um we were like suing the guy for stealing the couch or something like it was like a really one of those yeah I was on Judge Meablyn Judge Meablyn okay I spent yeah I was like really but it was funny because like they wanted me to be like the battered woman and then when they were me they were like no no no no no you're the friend you're the friend getting a pack for your that's like thank you thank you you are you know yeah I'm dead well you know sign me up we can do we can try it out again you know one of those things but I yeah that was it was crazy TV it's a it's a time it's a time I don't know I don't know um going back to it let's talk we're back to it more about your pitch like because about your pitch because you know as audience members watching the show like you said they oh my god to see like one little tiny slice of it like so you had mentioned you wish you would have done more references but like what else did you include in the pitch like what do you think makes for a good catch for something yeah so you know I was talking about like the way I saw the script and the way I saw the characters like it was a mother daughter relationship you know and I definitely wanted a cultural element so I wanted them to be black Russians because there's like half a million black Russians in the world and people don't really talk about it because in the 1980s a lot of Africans came to the so we've union studying college and so now I was like and also because the the mother character is like she could be a little verbally abusive and stuff and I was like if this if if there's random lines in Russian this is gonna splash you know um yeah yeah and then well I definitely talked about the world doing through like a sci-fi sci-fi thing um and honestly like I still think like damn I could have made a fire ask movie like a lot of the girls were complaining about the script I actually really like I thought I could do well with the script um so basically it was like um it was a movie about it it is on so the winner did create the movie it's called brain matter it is on HBL you can watch it the movie that was made of that yeah the movie that was made um like no she to me go she did a good job but like I the script felt so different to me I was like is this the script that I read because I don't see any of that like I guess like I think that I'm a stylized director and so like anything that I made is inherently gonna be stylized in some way like I saw a lot of like holy mountain like you know there was like a lot of trippy weirdness that could have been done in it of like just the characters were like I don't know I felt like it was sci-fi dystopian like there was like basically like this like I was called a well spring and it was like this energy that is where the character like the character is like had superpowers the mom and the daughter and the trying to protect the daughter from knowing she had superpowers but by doing that like the girl was just not able to control her superpowers basically and so there was this thing called the wellspring where they get their powers from and like you know I imagine it is like this like you know like white like sci-fi building like men and black with like these like power lines going through and like you know like not stormtroopers but like you know like men in these like weird uniforms like standing like in a row like very like kind of stuff yet also I did want to make like Soviet avant-garde references in it um I think I definitely said all that in the pitch but it's fine I you know but your ability like even communicating all this to us right now we can we see it visually like by listening to you you know and I'm getting and I'm getting your cultural background as a director like the influences that you bring to it specifically which makes you unique right and like brings your because that's a thing like when you get hired on as a director it's coming from a place again what you spoke about before it's like your creativity but also who you are and like what you're bringing to story so they know you know I know I want to work with Roxana Balobee um that she's gonna want to bring her her diverse background and culture in a unique way that really we like hasn't been seen before like and love everything you told us about historically like you're able to call back to that and speak so eloquently to that so that's really unique and anyone who's listening like if you're still trying to find your voice and like what's going to make you stand out like it's really just you and like what you're looking and how you communicate your truth to a story and that's that's why for me it was like you know my mom in the film it's it's just like I want to show the diverse culture I was brought up in in a household because that was like that's America to me like that's what it feels real and it might feel super random to other people but I'm like again like this is most of America like if you didn't notice it's not everyone speaking the same language in a household another feature that I'm working on right now um I'm probably just gonna like like I had the outline but I'm probably gonna like deck it out and then like that financing to fully write it but um the character is uh she's half Egyptian Muslim and half Russian Jewish because like also like you know and her name is ISIS nice oh shit we're taking it back baby ISIS was a goddess is something like that like it's never gonna be the same thing twice because I feel like yeah I have a tattoo that says earthling on it because I really just feel very like connected to a lot of different parts of the world like even through my own lens you know like even like watching for me like that felt more close to my culture than like watching something that's like weathe Miller you know what I mean because I'm running out of it so you know like yeah I'm not the Far East and not the Middle East and not Muslim but like there's a lot of overlap in our cultures you know just from like being Eastern European being Jewish like so I think I Is he Palestinian in Egyptian Muslim like I don't know it felt very Turkish in the show like the read like a lot of Turkish elements in uh where I'm from and in my culture and stuff like that and so like that was very similar to like oh well Turkey is like next to Egypt and then like you know the Jewish world there and like the turkeys like next to Russia you know the world is all active basically no it's very true 100% relate to me the that movie again not at all my culture but just being brought up here was Minari and like the struggles that family but through it's Korean Minari's me Minari's Korean and like oh my god watch it oh cry and it's like so beautifully done and like it's just like you know the grandma is like my bavcha but not at all like the grandma's a little different but because again Eastern European we have different your cultures but like my grandma was a prominent part of my family you know so it's just it doesn't have to be the same culture and I say this I've said this a couple times in the Pottwee time Lebanese directors on it's it's just just the the immigrant or first generation American experience that I want to see stories like that because that is relatable to me and my existence in the world you know and I think a lot of others so I think it's it's a really great and way as I think as a director for us to kind of share and and I think you knight a lot of people I'm not not really that's our you first generation I'm not so my great grandparents came over from Italy on my mom's side so my mom is fully Italian my dad is like a mix of so many different things to the point where like we only have some of it and like I've been in America for so long so he just embraces the Italian side so I usually just say it's cool yeah yeah nice yeah my dad's grand her is also okay yeah yeah yeah it's so funny to you with Italian culture it's like you can be removed by so many generations and it's still so embraced like Italian you're Italian I know I like hate going to Italy because I like speak to me in Italian and I'm like so far low in italiano but I don't know she understands a little bit his Spanish right but I think I'm like I think a little bit of Italian I literally know it's not enough so don't know like I've taken full loop in Italy and in Brazil both like you just speak Spanish and like you they'll speak back to you in Portuguese or Italian and like you're having a full-blown vocation yeah yeah yeah great so when I'm in Italy I'll just speak Spanish my my broken Spanish amazing yeah honestly okay well sign me up I I want to go so bad I haven't been and it's been my dream so I also just want to own a barata farm you know one day yeah I would love to use how they even make broth like you know cow and this is what I think let me break it down this is like what I have vision we got the fields we got some cows we got some others yes and then we have a bucket and then somehow we paste the cheese milk into another bucket of water that solidifies it and you have fresh broth it and you grow some tomatoes and I'm just gonna sell it to all those people in California he's making that they're rolling over in their grave right now we're quite literally rolling in the dough yeah how do you get that bouy center you know yeah do you know the process of the bouy center I guess we'll find out on your farm you're gonna find out you guys are welcome I can't share all my secrets okay or there's there's some process well we know you're gonna be making your own narrative you're you're going towards narratives and we are so here for this journey please keep us posted I know yes we'll chat um but what what else is on the horizon for you that you want to leave our listeners with and like yeah it's there anything I was excited that you want to mention yeah I'm doing a one woman show so doing some filming some prerecorded skits for it um like later this month when I get back to New York um I was going to before we had friends this this like this month but then families will happen so I'll probably be performing it in LA later in the year in like October, November that's my plan so I will let you guys know yeah basically I'm in the process of selling jimama stupi we're crossing her fingers I'm in the process of selling two tv shows right now and so the one woman show is based off of one of those it's like the stage version of one of those shows because like that's like amazing model the baby reindeer model you know those started off one full shows so I'm like really big in the solo show community right now in LA which is really cool um I'm actually going to London next week and I'm gonna go see a solo show on the west end so that's exciting yeah one thing about one people's shows is that like none of them are alike like every person is so individually creating it um and so I saw one woman show when I was in um LA you know I've seen a vibe and like watching a lot just to see what people do but um my friend Kim Cooper she did a show her's called Transracial I don't know she was adopted by white parents but she's Korean and so her whole show is also about like you know and she grew up in the Midwest and Iowa the only Korean like her show is great yeah she did a lot of pre-recorded skits and I was like oh my god this is the fucking thing you know um and she said she was like yeah like even doing that you're saving yourself time on stage because you don't have to be like running around all the time and I got home and the next day I wrote 10 pages of my show I was like yeah really I really haven't seen a lot of people do the pre-recorded skit thing and I'm like I haven't I'm like that is genius like number one you're production now you number two you're like chilling you know there's just a lot more leeway in that so yeah that's smart and again another thing that's gonna send to a part you know because it isn't something common you see exactly exactly so it's really interesting you will always see like um a little of hang of uh creativity from everyone person show you see and like how they interpret the stage for themselves it sounds like you really have all this control and ability to do it whichever way you want to do it and that's incredible so um I definitely like want to learn more and definitely gonna see your one of them in shows of congrats that's amazing yeah I think it was like meant to be uh from e-naught to do it in June because like I need to see her show and it like expanded my consciousness of like where I'm gonna see my show um yeah I've like written all these random scenes I don't know if you do that but like I've had like one-off scenes that I've written but like not really necessarily for anything and now they're like being put in the show you know so that's perfect yeah which is why people write shit down even if it's like okay I can't I don't know if this is going to be a full feature anything and like sometimes I'm like why did I even do this but you just never know when that is gonna come back into your life and how you can use it so if you're feeling the strike of inspiration like go write it down because yeah it's it's something that you can always go back to later on and it's that's really cool that you've been able to do that with all things you've written well um I'm working with WMU right now as a writer um and uh you know I had a meeting with my managers and I went through my ebber note I don't know if you guys use ebber note if you don't you shun it's an ebber note wait I think I've heard of it yeah so I I got it in like 2011 like pre my iCloud days you know and so now the notes are a little better obviously the note up but I still find myself using ebber note but anyways um I was gathering like all my ideas together for our conversation and yeah I was like wow I don't remember writing this at all like I'm like whoa I wrote this what it is you know so it's always good to like write down any idea that comes into your head even if you don't understand it later that's fine if it's meant to be a full form exactly exactly well I don't know what I don't know tell our listeners where they can find you so obviously they need to watch the show on HBO um but if they want to follow your journey and see more of your work and all of that let us know you know social media website anything you'd like to share you can find me on instagram and youtube as well under cnjora de la thought up uh s-e-n-o-r-a director with an a I think I might be changing that soon because I feel like I'm getting more into acting and I'm posting and I feel a little uh limited by that name but um transitioning is tough so for now that's the name um yeah my website's just rocksanabaldovein.com so catch me there it's a bomb task website by the way thank you I also have a podcast called do you boo um you're also inspiring me to maybe relaunch it I was I was like doing it on instagram live um but river tide seems like so easy to do on the zoom so we'll come over and get them out but you guys can find my episodes on spotify as well so amazing but thank you roxy for coming on the show today this was such a blast like just so far to spill the tea on so we're gonna thanks yeah so thanks for listening to femmer guard podcasts if you like what you hear tune in every friday for more tips on the filmmaking business and insightful conversations with industry professionals we can only grow with your support so please subscribe share rate and review you can also join the fem fam on patreon for more on us check us out at femmer guard.com you're listening to the geekscape at work